#I dont even need to really explain much for that

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for not telling a girl her boyfriend is cheating on her

My ( 17F) best friend (17M) recently got back together with his ex girlfriend. The broke up for the first time about a year ago after a six month relationship and then got back together two months ago im pretty sure . She is a very sweet girl , admittedly i dont know her that well but she seems nice , while my best friend , despite how much i love him , has made a lot of mistakes in his life and he cas been a real jerk in the past . For some reason she decided she wanted him back , even if the break up was very terrible and she started flirting with him again .About two months ago , when they where in the talking stage me and that friend hooked up . I didnt think much of it because they werent officially back together and handt talked about being exclusive , despite there being a lot of rumors of them dating again

Couple weeks from the hook up pass and he texts me very late at night drunk out of his mind , asking me to come over to his appartment. He and the girl at that point had officially gone on a couple of dates and where in am exlusive relationship. I wrote it off again , thinking he was drunk and stupid and that the relationship was new and he still had a little room for making mistakes like that

Another week passes and he texts me again asking me to come to his apartment to hook up , only this time he was very sober . I reject him again , only that time i mentioned his girlfriend and i told him that dming girls asking for hook ups is borderline cheating and that if he wants things to work out with his girlfriend he needs to stop it with the booty calls . He apologized imidietly and said hed never hit on me again

I thought that was the end of that , that he had finally settled down amd would stop with the hitting on random women . Well last night he texts me again explaining how hes dming this chick who is not his girlfriend , who i know for a fact he really really wants to fuck and hes asking me for advive and asking me how he can play it so she agrees to go out with him .

To my knowledge he hasnt hooked up with anyone since getting back together with his girlfriend , but i have proof in screenshots that he has hit on other girls with the intentions of sleeping with them . I dont particularly care about his girlfriend, and even though hes a jerk i really care about him , and we have a complicated history and i would feel very bad if i ruined this relationship for him . I have at multiple times tried to convince him to break up , or even ask for an open relationship but he wont listen . If i send the screenshots to his girlfriend our friendship would be ruined , and also its not really my place at all , shes the one who wanted to get back together with a man shw knew for a fact to be a jerk , she knew what he was like , they dated for a long time when the first got together and he had very similar behaviours . I think i should just let her discover it on her own .

#aita #am i the asshole

[goomyloid]

PLEASE explain your thoughts on kriselle in full detail

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS 100% UNPROMPTED ASK! I SHALL EXPLAIN

i hate toby fox. why did he do this to us. he really put it better than anyone else. not really romantic not really platonic but…. something else… some secret more sinister more heartfelt more absurd third thing

i wonder at what point should i clarify that i dont even really seek out kriselle in a romantic context… DONT GET ME WRONG i have zero issues with the ship whatsoever and all of the krisellers out there are living their best (most painful) lives and i SEE THE APPEAL. BUT when i rotate them in my brain i dont need them to kiss or anything like that i just need them to sit down and sadly hold hands and stay like that forever and ever. in case you couldnt gauge that from my art so far

tldr i dont think i ship them in the traditional sense at least …. the things that i usually fixate on for any romantic ship are not there with these two. there are no romantic feelings there In my mind. and all at the same time i start screaming and throwing up and killing myself (all positive) whenever i see them even in the same image together. hngh

ive tried explaining this to people before and they usually suggest something along the lines of a QPR and even that doesnt feel right to me. truly the best way i can put it is… that red string of fate man… which i almost hesitate on saying too because i dont actually know if noelle is Quite an important enough character to the story to warrant a connection like that. WHICH IS A CRAZY THING TO SAY. I KNOW. DO NOT EVEN THINK ABOUT GETTING ME WRONG i think dess and her connections to gaster and her usage as a stepping stone into the weird route are all VERY important… but in my brain its just not kris/knight/asriel/every other mysterious main focus of the story Important. i didnt mean to get into deltarune theorizing here i hope nobody’s blood is boiling rn

so yeah in the end. toby fox once again put it best. they are friends, but they are also something else.

back to the actual pairing though… sometimes i think im going overboard and overestimating how close kris and noelle were as children because noelle will go and say things like “i wonder if we were ever really friends at all.” which is kind of a fair statement considering the circumstances. sure they played together and all and tagged along with their siblings to do stuff together but when dess went missing… it all kind of stopped. kris is just a kid, they dont know what to do or even how to process it, much like noelle. asriel is probably dealing with his own feelings, he just lost his friend and likely old enough to understand the weight of what happened. while noelle and kris cant say much to each other at all.

im always back and forth on speaking headcanons for kris but the one that i always seem to come back to is selective mutism… to me kris had a lot of trouble communicating well as a child and could only grow comfortable around certain people, asriel and noelle being clear examples because they’re both so patient with them. maybe because of this noelle felt like they could understand each other without really needing words, and just physical interaction was enough to achieve some form of closeness… or maybe that was all just on her end, she thinks when kris goes to play the piano. but if that’s the case, why does it feel like a concert just for her…?

jesus dont even get me start on them as teenagers either. noelle has lost her sister, and now kris has lost their brother… but not in the same way. they look at each other and wonder if they’re the same now. or, maybe thats too cruel. maybe its not the same thing at all. asriel’s coming back soon, after all. it will all be over soon, kris won’t have to feel this way for much longer, right? so then, why does kris look so miserable, sitting in the corner over there? all noelle feels like she can do is sit next to them quietly. to be there, and to somehow, vaguely, messily help each other. the misfit kids that dont really know how to talk to each other and yet understand each other regardless

thats why the dark world feels like such a dream to her. these crazy city lights, fantastical creatures, susie’s there, and she actually might have the means to defend herself and stand her ground, whether it be verbally or… otherwise

and most of all, much like with kris offering an adventurous haven to susie in ch1, the same is extended to noelle. by kris’s side, no less. it feels like theyre doing things together again, and its fun, and nostalgic… she wants to bring dess. and i think its okay to assume kris wants to bring asriel, too. recreating the make-believe world they lost so long ago… is it really possible?

no… how can it really be possible, when this isnt kris? something is wrong. its almost perfect, except kris… it’s them, but it’s not. she sees their face, their expressions, their laughs, their worries. and yet the voice that comes from them… isnt them. and it scares her! even if nothing particularly bad happened as a result. and if something bad DID happen, well…

she just wants what they had before back. is it really so impossible? can they reconcile after all these years? does kris want to? is kris capable of doing so? maybe they just need to hug again. will it feel like a real hug? the person she thought she understood is acting in ways she doesnt understand. they’re telling her to do weird things. they cycle through actions as if they just want to know what happens. and they cant even play piano anymore.

#mailbox #im gonna kill myself #kriselle #long post

[late-tothe-party-07]

*ahem * *picks up notes *

Leo is strategy smart

Donnie is science smart

Mikey is emotional smart

Raph is support smart

In this essay I will-

#save rise of the tmnt #2012 tmnt #2012 leo #2012 donatello #2012 mikey #2012 raph #No cause I was thinking about it #Mikey is the best with navigating emotions #He's always the first to get through #whether that be to make friends #Or calm people down #Leo has a million plans and backup plans #He is quite literally always either on fight mode #Or planning for a fight mode #His main hobby us training #Come on #Donnie is very obviously science smart #I dont even need to really explain much for that #Raph gets overlooked but hes defintely supportive smart #no no no shut up #listen #He's the one who told Mikey he didnt need Bradford #Hes the one who has on multiple occations #pulled Leo out of spiralling in anxiety and overthinking #He's the one the boys looked to when Leo was out #He was the one who stood guard #Hes the one who whacks the others upside the head when they do smth stupid #but ultimately he just wants them to be safe #He doesnt know emotions very well #But he can be a physical comfort

[fujii-draws]

OKAY! Chatot rant in tags below! Read at your own discretion.

#okay starting from the beginning of where ppl usually dislike him. apple woods chapter. #he doesn’t give hero/partner the CHANCE to explain themselves despite them being relatively good recruits up until that point. #and that legit might be my only gripe with that chapter bc!!! stories need conflict! I LIKE the conflict in apple woods!!! #hero and partner being punished so something they didn’t do! #the misunderstanding! how team skull (Skuntank) actually outplays the main duo with a clever yet rotten trick. I LOVE that it segways into- #one of the more sweeter scenes of guild members looking out for eachother. I LIKE APPLE WOODS CONFLICT. #but chatot just. not giving them a chance. is so dumb. #I’d personally fix this by having a lil montage of hero/partner fucking up on jobs. A LOT. and chatot giving them a pass every time. #and let the perfect apple incident BE the one where he puts his foot down and doesn’t listen to them. bc he’d given them loads of chances. #and doesn’t want to hear any excuse. #but yeah. I legit dont mind him during that chapter except for that really stupid and frustrating moment. #NOW. CHAPTER 17. #UGGGGHHH WHERE DO I BEGIN #Him not believing hero and Partner about Grovyle and the future being in ruin? FINE. ACTUALLY GOOD. BC CHATOT WOULD BE SKEPTIC. #IT FITS HIS CHARACTER!! #BUT WHAT DOES SUCK. IS HIM GOING ‘Dusknoir isn’t the bad guy. he didn’t do anything wrong’ #WHEN HE LITERALLY KIDNAPPED HERO AND PARTNER RIGHT I N F R O N T OF HIM. #(​NO LITERALLY. HIS CHARACTER IS IN THE FRONT ROW WHEN IT HAPPENED.) #and him. having the GALL to tell hero and partner they must’ve been ‘seeing things’ and downplaying the HELL they went through. #despite them being missing for hours/days. his own guild recruits. and his angry sprite showing up. #like. I think that’s when I genuinely despised him. #that and him going ‘OH I BELIEVED YOU THE WHOLE TIME HEEHOO :)’ shit was so fucking annoying. #just playing it off as a joke the second the guild started to believe hero and partner. #IMAGINE IF HE W A S ACTUALLY TESTING THE GUILD’S TRUST. SHOWCASING HIM AS THE MORE RESPONSIBLE AND RESPECTFUL RIGHT HAND OF THE GUILD. #and yes. Brine cave he saves hero and partner. but at that point I just didn’t care anymore. #he fucked those two over so much. that I didn’t care what ‘valiant’ sacrifice he had. #and he grills Team Skull for what they did OFF SCREEN. they couldn’t even give us THAT. #<<< THAT or him outright saying sorry would’ve been nice. IKIK his ‘actions’ or whatever but. #eughh again this is all imo. I’m not trying to make people hate him or change their mind. #I’ll get into positives in the second post cause I’m running out of tags

[ra-vio]

semester is almost over. im dying

#my oc #rune #mori #i have a project due tomorrow and its finally scared me back into drawing #even though i should be working on this project but im SO SO SO TIRED #i went on an outing like 2 weeks ago the same week that i walked everywhere cause i was desperately #trying to get my taxes done but thats a different story but the point is i was walking a lot and i went on an outing where i stood all day #and then i had to go to class the very next day thinking i was fine but i wasnt. #and that same day after i walked across the city because i absolutely had to pick a thing up. i think the same week i met up with my mom #a couple of times but i was walking the whole way there. my point is that for 2 weeks straight i have been rigorously walking everywhere #and on my feet all the time with little breaks in between and my feet fucking hurt man #i need this semester to be OVER i need to sleep for a MONTH #but i cant because i have to scrape together SOME of this project and finals are next week #this class this project is for fucking sucks. all semester ive been teetering the line between pass and fail #and its not even my fucking fault. im so burnt out so i dont want to do this project. but i might fail if i dont #i need to at least demo it but i have like. one thing done and i dunno what to tell my TA about i #how do i tell my TA and prof that everything is too much for me so i absolutely could work on this project #my laptop is broken so im afraid to use it. the server kept going down last month so i was afraid to use that #so many stupid little things keep piling up and i'd sound really weird trying to explain why i cant do my work #because my desk is on the floor and it makes me really sad so no i cant do my hw. my fave candy has red40 in it so i had to stop eating it #but now i cant do my work because i was using it to help me focus on my hw. LIFE SUCKS BRO #anyway whatever happens. i cant wait to play video games again

[rat-rosemary]

Sometimes I want to talk about my horror road trip au where C!Dream and Quackity are best friends and then I remember that au is pure nonsense

#the dog barks #dreblr #Quackity is reincarnated and had no memories of the dsmp #C!Dream isnt. and lives kinda... trying to keep a parallel reality stable? #everyone was reborn and C!Dream needs to deal with all the weird paranormal shit they left behind #and then Quackity accidentally drives right into it #C!Dream is just... look I dont like the guy but he's going to die if I dont help him. Hes not even the same guy!! <-ignoring his trauma #so Dream sneaks into Quackity's car. but he's kinda stuck as his prison body because he's stupid and very much still traumatized #so he tells Quackity to not look behind him. and Quackity is terrified so he doesn't #so Quackity just has SOMETHING in the backseat of his car guiding him through hell or wherever the fuck he is #anyway. yeah it doesn't make much sense and I dont explain it really well here #dreamwastaken #c!dream #... im scared of properly tagging Q #ask me about this au please

[i-bring-crack]

Alright yeah fuck it. If you dont have characters that will be beloved by the people who read it then the stories dont last long in a fandom or sometimes even have an impact on people. Fuck the premise fuck the storyline fuck your worldbuilding becuase Ive seen so many, MANY, stories that are great have no one else to talk about simply because the characters were either too little screentime or none at all to be explored.

And now more than ever more people will define their liking of a story to whenever or not the characters are solid on their own instead of everything else. Its why much of the retellings or the same genre tropes are played out over and over again instead of new things compromising around the same idea.

And its not bad, but its also dumb for someone to go ahead and call another work of art, of whatever kind but im mostly talking about stories here, as a 'lesser work' simply because theres no characters that fit into neat molds or are hot and you can quickly get attached to, completely ignoring everything else about what it is and just deciding everyone who likes it has horrible tastes.

#rant #another personal rant oh boi #but honestly ive been looking at this obbession with fandoms lately. and even im the culprit of it. #where now a story is less defined by its content and instead defined by tropes #and its most consistent on characters as if you have to fit all of them into molds and let your characters be the best versions ever becaus #it will attract more people to come over and ship your works or have enough attraction to these characters that will make the readers buy #more of their content. merch. whatever #yeah specially in anime #and so specifically in isekai to the point where the character only needs to be physiscally attractive--- #but im getting out of the point #the thing is that so much art in general has been constantly linked to having this parasocial relationships with the ones who interact with #it that to some extent its fine but to the worst its litterally chaining people to spend away their lives and profits for something thats #just art. #i really dont know how to explain this to you without going over the basics of blah blah capitalism and the entretainment industry and #people linking their traumas and using parasocial relationships as coping mechanisms for their miserable lives and thats why so many #character driven stories sell so well nowadays. #without so so fucking much needed to be told but I just think it needs to be talked about at some point. #and to be clear again im also one of the people who IS stuck with those parasocial relationships #but ive seen worse and im genuenlly scare of what that could possibly meant for the future

[hotsugarbyglassanimals]

i know im not breaking new ground for saying legend of korra is disappointing but so much of the series is genuinely off putting to me. the setting, the tone, how the narrative tortures korra it feels like

which is a shame because I love korra as a character (even if her writing isn't The best at times). but there are so many aspects of the show I don't like. fuck there's so many characters in the show I dont even like either

#says a lot how even when im not rewatching atla in its entirety i enjoy watching clips of it from time to time or analysis videos on whats #good about the show... #i have not touched TLOK since i watched the show finale when it aired #i cant stand mako. i dont even really like bolin much either #i feel like the biggest aspect of TLOK that holds it back is the fact that it wanted to be more 'mature' #ignoring the fact that the og series -was- quite mature. as in it knew when to take itself seriously! TLOK has a superficial idea of- #-maturity it feels like. like 'ohhh ohhhhh look we showed an airbender do killing isnt that cool!!" what the fuck EVER #I DONT CARE. i dont care when it feels like a slog to get thru the show and when u add things that mess w/ the allure - #- of the og show. I dont WANT to know how the first avatar came to be or why the spirit world exists #THE MYSTIQUE WAS WHAT MADE IT SO APPEALING #THE EXISTENCE OF BENDING WAS EXPLAINED BY PEOPLE OBSERVING NATURE AND IMITATING IT. OR BEING TAUGHT SPECIFIC ANIMALS #NOT BECAUSE OOHH LOOK THE LION TURTLES GAVE IT TO PPL TO TRAVERSE THE SPIRIT WILDS.... lame!! LAME!! #im angrier about this than i need to be lmao #the whole lion turtle thing just sounds like the show runners felt insecure about the finale of the OG series lol

[ff2-soda-pop]

I'm starting to question if I should even bother with the stupid paper.... I'm probably just gonna fail anyways lmao

#ive been running around stuck on Babysitter Duty for the past three days and the teacher only gave us any instructions on thursday yet #somehow expected a full paper done and edited by sunday. even if i wasnt stuck on babysitter duty she'd get a shitty paper just due to how #little TIME that is to get things done. but because i am on babysitter duty uhhh..... well so far there's no paper #ive been spending practically full days having to take care of my sister and i cant just Ignore Her so i havent done my paper while watchin #her because again: my focus needs to be on Her. and shes incredibly loud which makes it super hard to focus. fun combo /s #so i was like 'i'll just stay up Really Late and do it then' but that hasn't worked because my sister WONT GO TO BED if im awake. i was up #until 4am last night hoping she'd fall asleep and shut up and i could work but Nope! #and then i got too tired to even care anymore #i've tried explaining this to others and they're just like 'ok well you just need to find a way to make it work :/' which is very much #easier said than done! and im scared about this paper because this teacher doesnt accept late work at all for pretty much any reason #and im sure she wont understand my situation. because shes also the teacher that didnt understand that i didnt have the textbook on time #because it was still being shipped and i dont control the rate at which book ships and she was like #'..........okay well you still need to have the book by tomorrow at least <3' when i told her the book had Just shipped and idk when i'd ge #the dumb thing. so yknow i dont have high hopes about this #also just as extra 'make stuff more difficult' i have zero accommodations because my mom cant keep track of my fucking IEPs and they wont #let me have accommodations unless i have that and idk how to get a copy anymore. so i've also been running around with no help in that area #and it's not great </3 #idk im just stressed out and frustrated and i Want To Cry :) #vent

[doodlebloo]

Do you guys ever think about how (as far as we know) c!Tubbo arguably made the right choice by deciding to never open up to c!Ranboo... Because c!Ranboo (when Enderwalking) retains all his memories and works alongside c!Dream anyway. So although c!Tubbo doesn't know it, his paranoia is actually keeping him safe, because the less info c!Ranboo knows the less he has the ability to tell c!Dream... Not that c!Ranboo necessarily would, but it sucks that like... c!Tubbo probably beats himself up for not wanting to share anything with his sweet and loyal husband, not even knowing that sharing the wrong stray detail about c!Tommy could have caused something disastrous. Like c!Tubbo was right to be a closed book and that shit hurts to think about!!!

#i need Ranboo to explain cRanboo so bad. #one of the only things i care about anymore. pls just tell me why a version of cRanboo with all his memories WHICH BTW #HIS MEMORIES WOULD INCLUDE THE DISC FINALE. Why that version of cRanboo would willingly help cDream. #Even IF cDream went ''oh i wasnt really gonna kill Tubbo it was staged also its good that New Lmanberg was exploded by me'' #and even IF cRanboo wasnt told why the prison tnt needed to be set off & therefore didnt know hed be hurting cTommy #how could he work with someone who he knows has hurt cTubbo like that. If he genuinely cared. #and i think about that a LOT a lot bc like. We see all these glimpses of cRanboo just... not listening to what cTubbo is saying. #the warning about cWilbur in ho16 is a good example but also just about history and Lmanberg in general... cRanboo sort of gives off the #vibe that he thinks he knows better than cTubbo does. That he thinks he knows what cTubbo needs and what's best for him #but also that he like... idk i just have thought about it a lot and worryingly i think he could become similar to c!Technoblade eventually. #Not in the ''violence is the only universal language'' way but in the way of like ''as soon as someone doesnt agree w my ideals and feels #differently than I do they have lost my respect and protection until they Prove themself and Earn it back'' type deal. not NOW i dont think #cRanboo is like that NOW but... Everyone always says ''cRanboo grow a backbone'' but he DID... While enderwalking. #ew!Ranboo is him with a backbone and apparently the him with a backbone does not care if he hurts his loved ones. #like cRanboo is part of the problem of people brushing aside cTubbo's grief and pain like it doesnt matter. cRanboo helping cDream has the #same energy as cJack trying to kill cTommy. this sort of ''he'll get over it'' mentality about cTubbo that assumes that just because he HAS #in the past been able to ''bounce back'' from indescribable loss that means things dont bother him or he can do it easily #so like. i do believe cRanboo isnt unsalvageable. i think the parts of him WE see are very much just misguided and not intentionally #hurtful. but sometimes i think abt Ranboo saying he was gonna make it so no one could be an apologist for cRanboo and I think like #what Memory does ew!Ranboo regaun that suddenly makes it fine for him to hurt his loved ones? for ''Dream Is The Reason'' to completely #disappear for him? is cDream offering him something he cant refuse or god forbid does ew!Ranboo just AGREE with him? #that to me is like. Once i know that i can be at peace. thats like one of the only things I'll be genuinely upset if it isnt explained #bc when i tell you it has been haunting me for like a year. #ok sorry for the rant and sorry boobers if i messed up some lore details lol #doodle.txt

[toastsnaffler]

ykw actually I am angry + disappointed w them. I've been pushing how I feel aside and trying to make it my own fault so it's all contained but I think theyve just been mean. and they really should know me better ik I try to pretend I don't expect more from them so I feel less hurt when they do things that upset me but we've been friends for years by this point. like come on.

#just got home and went to put my shit away but my flatmate was in the kitchen and i got suddenly so mad i had to walk back out #not going to do or say anything while im this upset. i need to be a lot calmer before i can even be in the same room as her #like okay. so originally it was just the two of them getting drinks and theyd rather it was just them bc i dont drink. thats cool #it wouldve been difficult for me to join them after work bc travel. and ik theyd done this before just the 2 of them and had fun #i can fully respect that its why i said no and stuck by that decision when she asked again #but to not mention she was taking the day off work and btw i just found out that BOTH of our other old flatmates joined in too #to not mention that they were travelling that entire distance and that it wasnt just drinks it was a whole day out together #thats just mean. why wouldnt you tell me that why did none of them say anything. #and the fact they did the exact same fucking thing last weekend too i didnt know about that at all #like i need to stop trying to justify it. im allowed to feel unwanted and excluded bc thats exactly what theyre doing. #im tired of feeling like other people dont want me around. i know i can be difficult and annoying sometimes. but im really not that bad #and we're meant to be friends!!!!!! like youre supposed to like your friends. and want to spend time with them. or at least i do #and yeah everyones annoying sometimes thats just part of being alive ur supposed to tolerate it if ur friends #im allowed to want to feel like im wanted. im allowed to want ppl to care abt me. that shouldnt be too much to ask for #but the overwhelming message im getting at the moment is they dont want me around. and when i am around them i feel like they dont listen #to me and that they dont really care how i feel unless it directly involves them or theyre responsible for it #i feel like they dont see me as a real person that exists. only a version they have in their heads and they base all their assumptions and #decisions off that version instead of directly communicating with me. and constantly avoid me under the guise of 'giving me space' #when im upset or having a difficult time and most need support from other people. i just feel really unseen #and ik that part of how i feel IS exacerbated by insecurity and depression. like they do care to some degree #but also a lot of it is evidenced in the way they act towards me. mainly my roommate bc shes the person i interact with most #and personally i find the most direct ways of showing u care abt someone are showing up for them. and making them feel seen #and maybe not everyone feels the same way. but thats how it works for me anyway #so to repeatedly exclude me and avoid acknowledging that ive been having a difficult time is the opposite of that to me #which is the point im trying to arrive at... sorry ik ive probably said similar things repeatedly the last few weeks but i feel like its #crystallising a bit like this is the core reason why im so sensitive and reactive atm and why i got so upset by it #idk. not tonight bc im still very emotionally raw but maybe tomorrow if im calmer i should explain that i was upset + why to her #i avoid doing that so often when im upset bc i dont think theres much point in having a conversation abt it unless u expect some kind of #resolution from it. or if you want an apology but idrc abt being apologised to the crucial thing is what theyre going to do different #and i love her but shes very resistant to changing her behaviour bc of other ppl being upset by it. and like i said before she has

[kimmkitsuragi]

look this will be extremely 2016-core of me to say but. 16 year old me would genuinely cry if she saw dan and phil announcing their gaming channel is back with a video featuring jacksepticeye

#i know their gaming channel was still active in 2016 BUT DO U GET MY POINT???? #im ngl i do not keep up with these guys anymore the last time i actually try to keep up was when they came out #and then i started to not enjoy their recent videos :( so i stopped #hopefully i have enough cringe living inside of me so that i can still watch their gaming videos :3 #once again im ngl even if i dont keep up w these guys anymore they still mean so much to me tbh like....... #it's s hard to explain #above all else; they literally taught me english!!! 😭😭 not even kidding!!!!! #i remember i started watching their videos while i still couldnt really understand english that much sdhfbdfh especially not spoken english #WITH accents mind u #and im 100% serious the moment i realized 'HOLY SHIT i can actually understand spoken english to a good extent rn????' #i was literally watching a dnp video at that exact moment #so yeah dnp literally taught me english. this is only one of the reasons why i care abt them deeply still #let's not get into the more emotional reasons #anyway another thing is sean was THE reason i got into gaming im not even kidding 😭 #i just realized i was so fucking real in middle school. a non-english speaker whose fave youtubers are #3 english-speaking dudes with Hard Accents. hell yeah #i need this exact energy with german rn #anywayyyyy i was also gonna say something else sbhsdbfdbfs im sorry for rambling but #everytime i open up sims 4 my thoughts are always related to dnp gaming channel fr #🗒 #sorry to be cringe or whatever btw #dnp

[iztopher]

on that note. a week or two ago i swapped out some info in my about to list my gender as genderqueer as a super low stakes way of feeling it out lol

ive spent pretty much my whole life w/ my gender on a sliding scale from "agender" to "gnc cis girl" and while i definitely still feel more connected to the former than the latter rn i like. really appreciate genderqueer as a term that captures every stage of that

#dear mel #i know its okay to change ur identity but i kind of am tired of feeling like i need a new way to describe my gender every year and a half #i like having a word that feels like its described me at every point in the last fifteen years & will for the forseeable future #if i wanna get more specific and granular at any point in time well i can do that too #and i also feel like the idea of queering gender is like. central to how i relate to it #how else do i describe feeling overall genderless but also such bitter disappointment at the idea of my gnc traits being explained away #as oh im not Really a Girl TM which is why i dont want these things girls want #like no. even if i was a cis woman i would not want to be a mother or a wife and i would want to dress masc and present masc/androgynous #which is i think why i have such issues w applying the idea of dysphoria to myself? #because for me its so much more complicated than (x) trait is associated with (y) gender im assumed to be and am not #and i know dysphoria is more complicated than that too but thats often how i see conceptualized and i dont want it applied that way to me y

[garbage-floof]

do yall see one of your friends being a massive jerk and doing something slightly offensive and you fucking have a verbal fight w them in your head

like, you're a great friend! but if you don't shut the fick up and listen why this is offensive then we can't even be friends anymore

#adam's vent tag #this needs a lot of context in too tired to write #but #implying (in a joking manner no less) that someone in the room (metaphorically) is gay/trans to very obviously homo/transphobic classmates #does so much harm #like if someone comes out to you you keep your mouth shut even if they're a walking pride flag #just shut the fuck up #it's not that difficult #another small ick i have w this friend #is that i told him i wasn't very comfortable with my classmates jokes #(they were 'joking' about killing and shooting boys that wear dresses) #and that i also didn't feel safe around them #and he responded w 'theyre just joking. why are you taking them seriously?' #with a straight fucking face #do i even need to explain why this is fucked up to say to a trans kid? (or anyone) #i could give a million different examples of this #you can literally excuse an bad behaviour with this logic #if you can do that then i dont really trust you #anyway im ranting and rambling #and i want to strangle him!!!

[sashasluggo]

dont mind me just venting in the tags

I don't expect anyone to read these or to try to comfort me or anything

I just word vomited mostly and it's a bit all over the place

tw parental trauma, religious trauma a lil

#vent post #I need to block my parents numbers but I cant get myself to do it #i haven't messaged them since february and they're still harassing me and trying to make me feel bad #and i don't have the energy to really explain everything #but long story short I told them I'm trans and things went downhill ever since #and im tired #im tired im tired im tired #im tired of feeling like im a bad person for standing up for myself #im tired of feeling like a bad person cause my mom keeps reminding me of how much “I” made her cry #i just #i wish i had normal parents #who didn't keep falling for right wing bs #and that didnt use religion as their only moral compass #they keep trying to guilt trip me #and they keep going off about how selfish and mean I'm being #and basically implying that the stress “I” caused her is killing her?????? #im tired #and even without all the trans related stuff #my parents are the reason im traumatize #traumatized* #my parents are the reason im scared of having needs #why i dont value my own needs #why im scared of people #and im slowly getting better #but it's hard #i feel alone

[theclosetedskeleton]

just got this random hatred for myself ANYWAYSSS sorry if i start posting about needful things/the dark half a lot

#TGERE ARE THE DARK HALF REFERENCESIN NEEDFUL THINGS #THERE IS A SHORT PART WHERE ALAN HAS A DREAM AND FUCKING GEORGE STARK SHOWS UP #I cant really explain it bc tdh spoilers & you'd need context BJT THIS MADE ME HAPPY #i dont even really like george stark that much but YAYY #i think thad beaumont is mentioned in bag of bones by stephen king but i forgor #closet rambles again on tumblr #the castle rock hyperfix... its so over