#Bc i feel so much and i want to talk about everything. Thats why i somewhat hesitate to say some things

[perilegs]

sometimes, just for a moment, an old habit kicks in and i think i'd be easier to love if i wasn't trans, but, to whom would i be easier to love?

#like genuinely. ok boohoo i would have a loving mom if i wasnt trans but also why do i want the love of someone who isnt willing to give it #also sometimes some part of me goes through LAYERS of transphobia and sexism and thinks i could never be ''man enough'' #to date women. whichm that so fucking dumb it's funny #first of all im not going to unpack that. 2nd. i'm 5'8 and an effeminate bisexual with birthing hips inherited from my father #no amount of being a cis guy could make me masc #but my main point being. why would i want the love of these hypothetical people of theyre only willing to give it under the condition #of cisness. like? hello??? #leevi talks #im in a weird mood today so you guys have to bear with me and my posts #also i have to admit. what made that thought come into my head was me being sad that there probably aren't many #women who'd want to peg me. bc i feel like the amount would be higher if i was cis #but that's still silly #but yea its weird getting a momentarily thought riddled with so much internalized transphobia and sexism etc. it makes you pause #and re evaluate everything about how you were raised bc i know thats not me but a part of me did believe something like that oncr

[orcelito]

read a fic earlier that's just like infiltrated my brain. i am thinking about it so fucking much. i keep remembering it and kicking my feet and giggling like an anime schoolgirl over some severely undernegotiated hardcore bdsm smut like MAN it was neither safe nor sane but it SURE WAS FUN.......................

#speculation nation #me so thoroughly enjoying the angst and the sadomasochism in the fic and being like #oooooooh so Thats why my writing is like that................ #like i been knew ykno i fucking Love making my characters suffer #but the utter Glee that this fic makes me feel. it makes ITNL 15 Make Sense lmfao #drawing hearts in my mind's eye around the concept of branding initials over the Eye's tattoo and also accidentally breaking his neck. #like Whoopsie! sorry. heres ur juice. ur better now. Heart #ok but real talk vash doing Whatever ww wants without regard to what HE wants so that ww is having a fucking religious experience over here #but vash ends up rly freaked out bc of uhhhhhhhh well ya kno he sure did accidentally take that Pretty Far Huh #but he had his juice he's better now. but also vash is like 'ok if we do anything like this again we r gonna do this My way' #which is understandable! and how things should be for them to both have fun with it. #but also im just obsessed with everything about this fic. vash freaking out afterwards and just totally breaking down #like OUGHHHHHHHHHHHH it's so fucking good. it's so much fun. i will be thinking about this fic for my Entire fucking life

[lepidopterium]

~~~

#like i dont have the energy to try and get myself into a routine. work business as usual so future me doesnt have to #catch up with everything ive fallen behind and let fall apart #i dont have the energy to reassure anyone that im suicidal but i will be okay. i dont know that. i dont want to promise that #and i dont have the energy to talk to anyone. barely have the energy to leave the house but i cant stand being here so thats what helps #i already have a plan but im trying not to go through with it for the sake of my brothers. but im having trouble caring either. #i cant talk to anyone. i cant lie and tell them im managing bc im not. not even a little. #listening to music isnt working. getting high isnt working. sleeping and eating isnt working. going out for air isnt working #i dont know how to pull myself out of this. i dont know why this last fight with my mother was my breaking point but it was #and i regret reaching out for help because it only #it only showed me that no one will help me get out of this house. i have to do it myself. no one can save me from this. #and i feel all the less human for it #and im heartbroken because here are two adults. so called parents. put me through years of abuse and horror who i still manage to care for #and worry about. all while im not human to them. thats what breaks my heart. thats what hurts #i cant swallow it all up anymore. my body is just racked with terror all the time. i cant pretend to be happy and engaged when i feel so #incredibly fucking alone with this awful horror thats just always clinging to every part of my body. #i dont want to hurt anyone. i dont want to hurt anyone. i dont want to hurt anyone. i dont know what to do. #everyone loves me because ive given it my all to not base my actions on how much rage and hurt im carrying. or with family bc i stay in #the closet and turn the other cheek. because i take all my wants and i put them aside and i act based on not inconveniencing anyone #and thats such a stupid thing bc look where i am now. #no one sees me. no one knows how to help me. no one can help me. and i cant keep enduring this. i cant keep relinquishing choice. #i cant get myself to believe anything otherwise. and i want to be selfish. i want to do the most selfish thing i could ever do to others.

[southerngothicaf]

Ohh no.

#ignore #clownery ahead #i may be fucked. this concert and this whole trip has like solidified my feelings for my best friend. #like before they were like there and i knew and it was def growing bc of living together and stuff #but i was getting on top of it and being careful and smart about it. ive done it before and everything #but man this whole thing. the way we've interacted #its a level of comfortability we havent really done before. #idfk why maybe bc of like natural progression of friendship idk #i wrapped my arm around her shoulder more today than i probably have in my whole life #we were so touchy at the concert bc yknow we're having fun dancing and singing and stuff. sitting close to each other #but the way my insides go crazy at every touch. whether its her touching my arm with the back of her hand to get my attention and resting #it there for a moment. or the hug we had after the concert that was so fucking strong bc we were both emotional. #i go wild inside im like a fool. all butterflies and warmth and that shit #thats not good to feel about my best friend and roommate 😐 and i know and i gotta work on it and find some solution. #but bro if we keep being this touchy. like if this is just how our friendship is now. #it will be the best and worst thing to happen. because it feels amazing but it will never progress further and god do i want it to #and i gotta stop being jealous abt every dumb guy. its bc of insecurity and i know it. i instantly compare myself in the most painful way #every time she talks abt her crush it hurts so much and i gotta stop myself from thinking those thoughts or lamenting that she will never #talk that way about me or feel that way about me #fuck this is gonna be a rough one #but i am still choosing to not let that tarnish the amazing time i had seeing taylor swift. she was the first artist i ever wanted to see #in concert bc she was like the first artist i ever became a fan of as a lil 6 year old #and i finally got to see her and it was incredible and i wish it had never ended #(and it wouldnt have been as amazing as it was if she hadnt come with me)

[dolls-self-ships]

hey guys, I've been having a hard time lately and it's really hitting me hard today, would any of y'all mind maybe dropping a comforting message in my inbox? Could be from an f/o or just you I don't mind either way, I just need to feel like I'm not alone right now ;-;

#my ocd has been flaring up so so bad lately and my medication isnt working as well as it used to #and i had to leave work like... 5 times this month abd I just feel so ashamed and guilty #and then when I got home for some reason my sister wasnt home even though she usually is bc its unlike her to go out unprompted #ohhhh wait as in typing this Im just remembering she had to go to the mall today #thats why shws not hime #anyway in my panic attack haze I thought bc my managers texts werent getting through to me even tho she said she had texted me just so i #could let her know I got home safe #shes super sweet- they werent getting through to me so like I started freaking out 'wait what if im dead and it happened on the walk home' #bc before I kept saying 'I wish I was dead' when really that just means 'I want to be ok and normal and not whatever this is' #so I thought I had manifested it somehow and thats why my managers texts werent getting through and why my sister wasbt home #idk why Im explaining all this in here I just need to vent I think ;-; #but im like.. gonna try to do some laundry maybe that'll take my mind off things #oh I called her by calling the store and everything was good so #and like.. my logic brain knows that Im not dead and that my sister is just getting her ipad fixed and Im able to contact the outside world #just fine but my anxiety brain is telling me that im just fabricating this all in my head and im actually dead irl #which is so dumb and out of nowhere ik but I think the whole 'careful what you wish for' thing is so ingrained into my head #and that isnt even what my ocd is about its an entirley different topic that I am just too scared to even talk about #reading this back and realizing all the typos I made is filling me with so much embarassment Im sorry for your eyes my hands are shaky

[just-a-simple-dyke]

Kp is so good when they take themselves seriously i wish they did that more often

#torture scenes are a prime example #this show does visceral and cruel so well but only when it wants to!! i hate that theres so much comedy and slapstick in there #if they dialed down on the comedy for like 80% i knowwww they could achieve so much more in terms of plot and interaction with it #the occasional cinematic genius undermined by all the comedy makes me sew mad you do Not need that many tonal shifts😭😭 #porsches bathroom breakdown. when kinn let him go in the woods. the torture scenes. bathroom hj. ep 1 bar talk. most of ep 7 #tankhuns comedy i enjoy and think is a great breather bc it fits his scenes!! i dont think they should get rid of all comedy but like #keep it where it fits only otherwise it just upsets the mood flow #gdjdgdjd ok im okay again whatever. i refuse to call this a bad show bc theres so much good stuff in there it just needs more balance #and it needs more correction on certain narratives like please acknowledge big and ken hello?? why are u not doing a check of all staff #when you KNOW theres been a mole this should affect your security measures #i think if they really committed to the 'gritty mafia show' it wouldve worked out a lot better! obviously still keep in tankhuns wit #and the breathers of the honeymoon phase and porsche and chay together and such #but swap the slapstick for more insight into how each character feels about everything thats happened or more reflection yknow #anyway this is not necessarily in regards to ep 10 its just a general observation because sometimes this show goes !!!! #and other times its like. well. that was a choice #do i want to tag this......i dont think so

[be-good-to-bugs]

in another life id of done wrestling

#the bin #literally always wanted to. maybe cause im a lesbian lol #but alas i have joint disorder and also other disorders so its not possible :( #its fun. i did some once and it was fun and i always wanted to do more but didnt have the opportunity #literally i dont think anybody would guess this about me based of how i am usually bc of my demeanor but like #ugh. it makes me sad #i have like 0 interest in most wrestling stuff bc theres just. so many issues with it (misogyny for the most part) but womens wrestling is #cool a lot of the time. idk. wrestling that really puts the performance part into it. cause its like. not just ppl beating each other up #tho it is that too (and thats fun also lol) #i dont talk abt it much anywhere but i should more i think #my sisters sort-of-ex-boyfriend/current best friend is really into wrestling and its made her interested so ive been thinking abt it more #bc im finally gonna have someone to be into ut with me #like. just LOOK at womens wrestling and tell me its not cool. u cant. its gr8 #and the clothes are super cool like wow #also its like so fucking gay like oh my god #why does god hate me and everything i wish to do and be? #me as a child deciding not to do wrestling bc my body is in constant pain for some reason and i feel dizzy a lot so itd a bad idea #and then doing gymnastics instead which just fucked up my joints real bad #well. at least i didnt get to do ballet. i wanted to so bad but itd of messed me up even worse 4 sure #tbh the main reason i didnt do wrestling is bc i knew my mom wouldnt get it and would prob say no and think its weird cause she had #expressed that she didnt get it before. but i guess in the long run its good #ugh whyd my childhood crush have to do gymnastics. my being gay only made my joints worse! noooooooo

[skeletxr]

:

#rambling in the tags about smthn i dont want ppl to misinterpret #but as much as aromanticism is valid and everything #i think we should start talking about the fine line and overlays of aro specs and ppl who have avoidant/disorganized attachment styles #for 10 years i thought i was aro #or demiromantic or something bc i didnt think i had much capability of loving nor was i interested in it #but no now im realizing no i want to be romantic i want it so bad i want affection i want all of that #i just have a fearful avoidant attachment style so its difficult for me to really REALIZE and accept my feelings #all the while being terrified of being abandoned and forgotten about and unloved #had no clue what attacment styles were until a few months ago and im like oh thats why i feel that way. it makes more sense #than saying im aro #not saying its impossible to have a dismissive or fearful avoidant attachment AND be aro. #i 100% believe my mom is aro but she is also dismissive avoidant. shess okay without love and affection in her life #she feels too suffocated when love is too much #bht no sir not i not my fearful avoidant ass. #and i think its important to educate people on that esp if they feel like arospec isnt an identity they feel comfy with #bc its like? but AM i really that?? #i could explain this better but not quite sure how to LMAO jts still early #just felt like rambking about that. arospecs u are soooo valid #anyone questioning if theyre arospec look up attachment styles. its rreally helped me out #text

[pizzapizzadickz]

I feel a lil bit better today after getting some rest in. I always feel better when I can spend a day at home. I think tomorrow I'll wear my noise cancelling headphones or something so I can chill even more.

...funny how my way to chill is just trying to eliminate all external stimuli

(Pt 1 for description rant)

#diary #personal #i rly wanna book a therapy appointment but im having a rly hard time trying to get myself to do that bc i need to check i can vid call #cuz my computer monitor is broke and havent fixed it yetttt ugh. #i rly feel like researching autism again. idk. i saw a video about communication badges being used at furry conventions #and by god that sounds so fun ;-; like. i really struggle with interaction with others and talking is sometimes really hard. #mainly bc if theres a lot of noise i usually wanna block it out and if i gotta take my earbuds out to comunicate all the time its not fun #idk. i just wish i could go around writting shit out for ppl to read and thats that. no need to speak to clerks or crap. #bc imma be honest. i have a hard time hearing too. like in crowded places. its so overwhelming all the time. #its both a good and a bad thing that im giving myself the permission to be overwhelmed in situations #but its also making it much more difficult to actually be in those situations. #idk. i used to force myself through it. tell myself i like it or whatever. but by god everything just hurts nowadays #like. i dont like leaving my house mostly bc of the sensory overload. #i wonder how things'll change in the future. just how much more accepting will i and society be. i dont know. #but i hope i learn to cope more. bc life is really hard and imma be honest im struggling at best. #idk. i find it so hard to work lately. i love my thoughts. they are so fluid. and just. language doesnt keep up. #everything i say or write isnt quite right. and it bothers me. i sorta wished telepathy existed just soley so i could comunicate #idk maybe someday ill learn sign language. and maybe that could help. but it wouldnt help when im shut down. or having a meltdown #yknow. i find face to face human to human contacr really scary. i worry theyll want to do something and i wont #i worry i wont be able to get across my reasoning as to why. i worry that theyll see just how odd my behaviour can be. #and above all i just sorta worry they wont work with me to meet me halfway. like. im stuck with my family i dont want that with friends too #i hope if i visit them itll be okay. that like. i wont cause a problem or accidentally offend them or something? #idk. i wanna make friends n hang out. but as ive gotten older ive discovered just how much i hate that. #like i saw a rly cool tik tok about how they set up their home for all their autistic friends when they come over. #like. its established you can just stop talking and remove urself if you wanna. and theres stim toys n plushies n shit. and low lighting #and just. that sounds like heaven. i struggle so much in social situations. bc i eventually get tired. #and it makes me feel sorta burnt out/depressed. so itd be nice if i could just remove myself from a stituation whenever. #or just lay my head down on someones lap and silently observe. #i wish i knew what to do when i get overwhelmed in public. bc it happens a lot. and i freeze. and idk what to do. #and ill cry and get overwhelmed and shutdown or meltdown. and i start to aimlessly wander and its sorta dangerous tbh?

[mrfoox]

Uh.... Kinda brought up an topic which was tough but it was okay....?

#miranda talking shit #As usual i never said all i thought bc i always have so much on my mind #But ... Basically mentioned that people but is the recent case oliver can feel like hes too careful with me #So ofc he clarified that he doesnt and just generally liked to be nice and not rude and i buy that but kept on saying #That people in my past also have thought i am more fragile and maybe proper than i actually am #And that im a very uncomplicated person when it comes to some things. For example how i feel about other people #They can tell me and do anything and that wont make me suddenly dislike them or drop them. If i like a person already #... Theres a point where i do not care what else they have done or do? At least ive not encountered anything that have changed it for me #Ive never met someone who killed someone or something but... Who have opinions or have done things or do things which i dont care about #For example drugs. I havent tried anything and probably wont but i know multiple who have or are using and that doesnt make me... Think #Less of them? So. I explained that and said that he had never said something to me that has hurt me or something. Or then i brought up #The incident a few weeks ago and said that time i got hurt. But then i cried for an hour and realized he probably said what he said #Bc he was scared and worried. And it wasnt about me at all. So then i was just ... Fine. I wasnt planning to say anything about that even #But told him anyway. And then touched on the topic that i... Do things... Without thinking about it in the moment #And then realize afterwards its somewhat intentional? And its not something i like to say bc i feel like a bad person? #We didn't discuss that much bc he had to go so idk if ill even bring that up again unless the topic is close but yeah. #He said it was a good talk and i agree. Im always worried to share anything i think or how i work with people bc i fear they'll think im #Weird. But i did it and he seemed fine and i was stable enough. I think he wont care and thats what i like about him but also #I know bc we are so different... It's more likely we misunderstand each other. And honestly i cant shake the feeling i scare him a bit #Bc i feel so much and i want to talk about everything. Thats why i somewhat hesitate to say some things #He also said he have a history of. Dropping people or having his opinion of someone shift bc of something. Thus then it make sense #He got freaked out by me that time. Bc he thinks in his terms and for him others can be changed by small incidents so he thought i had #Changed mine. Thus the 'ive ruined it. I ruined our relationship and it was so good' It should scare me more that he said that his opinion #Of others can change so quickly and big. Bc... Im anxious but for some reason i.. Dont feel worried about that? Maybe bc i have always had #The mindset that people will leave me in the end no matter what and that i always care more about someone than they me. So i dont expect #Anything of anyone i like... But today was interesting talk tbh. I love discussing things with him. He's so different from me it's fresh #Possibly my autistic ass being hyperfocused on him and intrested bc of that. This is kinda how i was with Fabian at some point #He felt like an interesting individual bc he was so different from me so i was obsessed with talking with him about things #I enjoy it and i wont share how i think so i dont scare anyone so.... Should be okay

[echo-s-land]

Relating to the "eldest daughter syndrome" while not being the eldest is something

#i dont know. i think i should talk to the actual eldest about it one day #like. my father doesnt know (and dont put efforts into it bc why would he) how to make my brother calm down #(or any of us since my parents' way of teaching us how to control our emotions is to not interact with us and leave us alone until we're #calm again) #and everytime he turns to me and asks me to do it ? bc i 'do it better' ? maybe but thats not my job #and i spent my entire childhood feeling guilty (and still do) not helping my sister with her mental health. while she infodumped me about #her problems #not going to talk about everything my father thought was ok to show me bc 'im so mature! so smart!' #my mom said i was the most easy to raise bc i was the calmest since the start #i understand i was a calm baby and theres no reason behind it. i just was #but after.. none of them know about any abuse/trauma i went through sometime i want to laugh at their faces #i forced myself to not have problems. to be close to perfection. to not make them worry. to take care of me myself. to not make them #have problems #since they already had to much to deal with #never told them about anything. had to deal with everything myself. and thats something i still do bc i just never learnt how to ask for #help #everytime i try words dont come out

[imwetforyourmom]

hi can u do headcannons (or a fic idm) of like people pleaser!reader and bf!matt who like stands up for her or tells people off on her behalf?

I really hope this makes even the slightest bit of sense

thank you so much, I love ur writing sm🤍🫶🏼

people pleaser!reader x matt headcannons!

(I have never done hcs ever, so if its bad thats mb, also I didnt know if you wanted nsfw but I js didnt bc I dont rllt know how to nsfw people pleaser x matt but if tou want me to retry it dont hesitate to ask!!)

warnings: angst, swearing

a/n: I dont rlly know how to write people pleasers and such so thats why its short, but I can try again if you’d like, I also love this idea, thank you anon!! <33

~

- the second someone pushes you around and or walks all over you hes quick to shut it down.

“alright listen man, it was one thing when you told her to fuck off, but telling her to shut the fuck up is another. I need you to leave.”

- when matt notices that someone is using you to their advantage or even notices you going out of your way to please them on several occasions hes getting it done and over with, quick.

“okay. enough y/n, come sit with me. you dont need to do everything for that asshole, k?”

^ he made sure to say it extra loud so the guy heard what matt had said about him.

- after matt had told someone off for being rude to you, you sat down next to him with your head hung low and your eyes filled with tears of guilt.

“baby, whats wrong?” he asked, his arm coming over to your back and rubbing your shoulder.

“that wasnt nice of you to yell at him.. look at him, I feel guilty now.” you spoke, your voice slightly shaky as you motioned to the man whom was anxiously biting his lip with his mouth closed shut, after matt had told him to keep it shut.

“it also wasnt nice of him to yell at you and call you names, was it?” he grumbled, just looking at the guy made him angrier, especially knowing you felt bad for him.

- “no, no, if you want me to. I can!” you spoke, a soft smile on your face as you talked to the girl infront of you, in which the girl had a smirk on her face, catching onto your patterns.. doing anything for the sake of pleasing her.

matt, on the other hand, stood behind you and glared at the girl, his jaw clenching with pure irritation. matt cleared his throat, trying to get the girls attention. and once her eyes met his he brought his hand up and flipped her off.

- in ways of showing you he wasnt happy with what you were doing he’d do subtle motions with his hands or look at you a certain way. you’ve learned that his jaw clenched tightly shut and his eyes glaring at you, then a quick look at the person you were currently giving your everything, is a way of him indicating he wanted you stop what you were doing.

- watching you adapt someone elses personality to try and seem more approachable and less weird truly angers him, despite knowing he cant do anything about it. he feels you should know that you’re perfect just the way you are and dont need to be accepted by everyone, they should like you for who you are.

- “oh..” you mumble, your head hung low as somone insults you and your interests. you cant say anything nor do anything, its not in your nature. you just have to sit there and take it, in fear of disappointing them. and since matt wasnt with you, there wasnt any way in stopping the next few minutes of being insulted.

later that day, when you come home your cheeks are tear-stained, you have mascara running down your cheeks and your breathing is uneven.. theres no way in hell you’re hiding this from matt. you take gentle steps as you walk to his room, slowly pushing his door open and taking small sniffles.

with hearing the door creak open matts lips turn into a grin, that is, until he lifts his head up to the sight of you, looking like you just bawled for hours on end. he quickly tosses his phone on his bed and walks over to you, engulfing you in his arms. already knowing what was going on he didnt ask anything, instead just comforted you.

- “ok! im fucking tired of your shit dude! you’ve been bossing, walking all over her, degrading and just overall being a total dickhead to her!” matt yelled, finally getting enough of this kid being rude to his girlfriend. he stood up from his chair and walked over to carlos. he stood tall and high infront of him. y/n moved behind matt and grabbed his hand, holding it and lightly squeezing, at an attempt to calm him down.

“matt, baby, its okay. im fine. dont yell at him.” y/n whispered, your voice quiet as you spoke. you avoided eye contact with carlos. “no, its not okay! hes being a total asshole to you, y/n. you dont deserve to be treated like that.” he turned around to face you. his voice no longer being loud as he spoke with sincerity towards you.

- you being treated rudely didnt always end up with him yelling at someone. when he wasnt fuming with anger, he would grab your hand and hold it, rubbing his thumb gently over your skin, then pull you into him, in a sense of protection and to tell you ‘enough’ without speaking.

- matt would act almost immediately when he even sees the beginning signs of you starting to act and do everything possible for the person you’re talking to. he would lean down in your ear and mumble quietly, “relax, my love.”

- again, he would make sure to be extra loud about shit talking someone when calling you over to him just to make sure that they know what matt thinks of them.

“cmon baby, that poor excuse of a friend doesnt deserve you.”

“hes being an asshole, my love. dont suck up to him.”

tags

@luverboychris @chrissturniolosfavoritesexdoll @meg-sturniolo @junnniiieee07 @genshin-addict @mels22lunchbox @ssilentzom @haunted-headset @dollyspsychoxo @sturnib-tch @b2cute @livvy4realll @graysturns

#sturniolo #matt sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #sturniolo fanfic #the sturniolo triplets #matthew bernard sturniolo #matt sturniolo x reader #matt x reader #matt girl #matt #sturniolo triplets imagine #sturniolo triplets fanfic #headcannons #hcs #matt sturniolo angst #angsty #angst ig #angst #light angst #mollys requests

[br4tphobia]

# — 𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐃𝐑𝐄𝐒𝐒 𝐒𝐄𝐀𝐒𝐎𝐍 !

𝐓𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐂𝐀𝐔𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 ! : 1.6k wordzz, connie x black fem ! reader, shorttt, proof read? nah. reader is wearing a sundress obvi, petnames (princess, ma/mama, baby ) you/your pronouns useddd 𝐍𝐒𝟒𝐖 + unprotected sex (condoms yall condoms!!), con talks you through yo orgassmmm, smut with not much plot obvi, fingering (f received) boob suckinn, choking, cowgirl, tummy bulgeeee, car sex, missionary, and dirty talk as always!!

𝐕𝐀𝐋𝐒 𝐒𝐏𝐄𝐀𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆 ! : oh did i tell yall this from experience? yhh 🥴 (NO THAT NIGGA DID NOT NUT IN ME.) @digitalreblogs here bby!!

a sigh fell from your lips, you miss him already and its only been an hour. you cant be this hooked onto this boy! right now, youre on the phone with your friend, liv. telling her everything that happened last night when he came over. until you get another notification from him, immediately making you smile.

“girl why is he tellin me to get readyyy!” you laughed at reading out the message connie sent you to liv. “girll get ready right neow!!”

“i sho am, hello??” you prop up your phone as liv watches your scavenge through your drawers and closet, you was becoming upset about having nothing to wear until you found this sundress, it was simple and cute, you could style it with anything. but you only threw a simple jean jacket ontop with your favorite fair of fuzzy slippers.

“oo shit girl you look cutee!”

“furreal? bc if im lookin bummy and you let me leave like this imma beat yo ass.” you’d pout, liv laughed. “puhleasee girl y’know i would nevaa”

“yeayeaaa..”

you stared at him coming closer on maps, which made your stomach sink deeper. “boo im kinda scared” — “why?? all that nasty shit yall did last night, you wasnt scared then?”

“girl. thats the point!” hearing another laugh from liv, “im sure youll be fineee.” — “girl i hop—“ the sound of your doorbell rung throughout the house, you swear your heart dropped to your ass. “what happened???” her eyebrows pinched together in confusion, “hes here girl.. ill call you back!” — “oh! ok have funnnn”

you both shared your goodbyes as you rush to the door, not hesitating to open it. “hey princess” a small smile was on his face, “hi con” he went in for a hug, your gladly took that offer, his cologne clouding your nostrils. he smelt good (like always.)

connie led you to his car, opening the door for you.

once he got in his eyes are immediately on you. the way the dress hugged your body perfectly, displaying every curve and dip. it wasnt long before he pulled over by a curbside.

you notice connie eyeing your beautiful physique again before unbuttoning his pants. “c’mere.” his voice was deep, seeing his semi-hard sitting in his boxers, which made you not hesitate to climb onto his lap, immediately having his lips touch yours. your tongue running over his as you both roam your hands on eachother. you feel his hands pull your dress up to your waist as he started playing with your clothed clit. humming out in pleasure. trailing down your neck with kisses, all you could do is grind on his lap waiting for the main thing you wanted. he knew it too although he wanted to make you wait.

“c-con..” his fingers playing through your folds making you choke on your words. “you can wait.” inserting his middle and ring into your slicked sex, earning a moan out of you. already going to work inside your walls, with his thumb reaching up to rub your clit. you reach your hand down to his now-hard dick, stroking him a few times, hearing connie let out a groan. his fingers still pumping and scissoring inside of you so good youre damn near riding his hand. letting out honey sweet moans in his ear, muffling them in the crook of his neck. you curse at his sly fingers bringing you closer to the edge with every flick of his wrists. “g’na cum already? youre getting wetter princess..” you felt embarrassed, how he could turn you into

“y—yes oh my god..” bucking your hips against his fingers eagerly for your orgasm inching closer to you, “cmon..give it to me, pretty.” his voice caressing your ears, hearing his cute sounds as you jerk him off slowly. “like that! shitt” your head flew back with a string a moans from your throat.

“a little more..fuckk” youre pulsing on his fingers, feeling your release coming. “make a mess, mama.” connies voice triggering your orgasm, gripping on his shoulders as he talks you through it. whispering sweet nothings in your ear while kissing on your neck. “fuck..con..” broken whines passing your lips, coming down from your high. “there you go..” his thumb still rubbing your pretty pearl, your cum stained thighs shaking from overstimulation.

“ready mama?” you didnt know what he was talking about until your felt his tip slide through your wet folds. a small gasp left your lips as you immediately hum a response. “words, princess.” — “mm…yes” you can feel him smile against your neck as he inserts his tip, holding a grip on your hips to help you sink down on his 7 inches, you both sharing a moan.

sitting there for a while to adjust to his size, his hands slid to your ass guiding you. “ouu shit..” your back arched, your breasts so close to his face. he just cant help but tug the upper part of your dress down and take a nipple in his mouth, suckling on it like there was no tomorrow. adding more sensations throughout your body, bouncing on his dick with his hand slapping your ass — he wishes he could see the ripples display like water waving.

“fuck...” your arms sat around his neck, head lowered right by his ear so he could hear all your sweet sounds he loves oh so much. the way your tongue carries the vowels of his name will never be attractive to him.

he started to thrust up into you a bit, his tip kissing your cervix sweetly as you already feel your second orgasm approaching. “shit g’na cum again ..” another pornographic sound leaving your mouth, along with your nipple leaving his.

“my godd..” you slow down, basically grinding on him to ride out your second high. “shit.. mama.” he’d groan with his head burried in the crook of your neck, feeling his breath fanning. he pulled away and pecked your lips before you started riding again, overstimulation clouding your mind, but it feels so good you cant stop.

“yo shit so creamy ma.. fuckk” groanin back into your neck as you continue your pleasing motions. you know hes about to cum by the way hes panting and getting louder. “cmon make cum princess..y’know how to fuck me..” moans and groans are sharing together throughout the car.

it wasnt long until you felt his cut spurting inside your walls drawn out with a groan. humming at the soothing feeling, cock warming him for a while before he slapped your ass. “get in the back.” a smile crept on your face as you pulled his dick out of you, seeing a thick ring around his shaft. a few droplets of his seed dripping onto the arm rest while climbing into the back seat before laying down. connie, who is trailing behind you.

“whatchu smilin fo’?” — “oh n—nothing..” he slid his tip inside you, causing you to choke on your words once again. a small laugh erupting from his chest.

his hips met the back of your thighs with your legs on his shoulders, “ouu shit..” gripping on his bicep with his strokes deep and slow, already hitting your g-spot deliciously. “you like that? when i fuck you deep like this?” your eyes rolling at his voice, “yes! yess fuck..” he leans down and touches his lips with yours, immediately swirling tongues around eachother, moaning in his mouth as you feel his thumb on your clit.

“oh shittt” muffled into his mouth, he pulled away and started speeding up his thrusting. aiming for the roof of your pussy, seeing a tummy bulge appear. your moans turning into a silent scream as you grip on anything in reach. connie only watches in awe on how he could please you so good.

only thing heard is the squelching of your pussy, along with small gasps and moans. he knew he was fucking you good and loved it, seeing every facial expression on your face. your brain feels like mush, your mind only on him and his dick. “mmm dont stop..! cumming again!” that signaled him to go deeper, with his hand slithering around your throat, holding a small grip.

“baby..baby! ohh my goddd.” — “i know, i know.” slowing down his thrusts, rolling his hips into yours with passion. “y’so wet mama..” followed with a small moan from him. you swear youre seeing stars, slurirng your inaudible words. “wanna gimmie one more? i know you can princess.” you hum out another response just you have your face grabbed, “words” — “y—yes.. i can.” your voice cracking as you focus on your pleasure. sticky lips parting to let out the sweetest sounds hes thriving on. running your hands over his skin layered with thin sweat ontop.

“fuckfuckfuck..” cursing at the rhythm of his pace, you can feel it near, its so far yet so close. “dont stop dont stop dont fuckin’ stop..” you both maintain eye contact, his are low — heart eyes would appear if they could. “you so pretty ma..” a another smile, showing off your pretty whites with your mouth forming into an ‘O’ soon from the spots hes hitting. “mmmfuhhck!” your wrap your arms around his neck, staring into his pretty hazel eyes.

“m’close baby..” — “yea? cmon princess, im there with you.” he switches both of your legs on his right shoulder, hitting the perfect spot you never knew existed. the wet sounds of your pussy growing louder by the second along with your whines. “hold out f’me.” — “i gotchu, mama.” cursing under his breath as he removes your arms and holds your hands. “a little more m’soso close..” your whole body feels like jelly, every stroke is like small sparks of electricity that pushes a moan out of you every time.

“shitshitshitt m’cumming..cum wimmie please..” pulsing around his dick, with the ring around his shaft thicker. he gave you a few more thrusts before sinking into you, you knew he was cumming the way you both shared moans together.

he kissed you, before he pulled out. “sorry. you look good s’all.” panting as you look at him with disbelief, only to see a goofy ass smile on his face.

#connie x black y/n #aot connie x black reader #connie smut #connie springer x black reader #connie springer smut #connie springer x black!reader #connie springer x reader #snk connie #connie x black!reader #connie x black reader #connie x y/n #connie x you #connie aot #aot connie #connie x reader smut #aot smut #x black fem reader

[livinahey]

aaaaaastrobs-essions (jk) .・゜゜・

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i'm back :)

.・。.・゜✭・.・。.・゜✭・»»————>

if you struggling with low self esteem go to fire sun/earth mars/venus in angles (1h/4h/7h/10). They will cheer you up and remind you that you deserve fine things in life 💅✨🧚‍♀️ just dont fake your insecurities to them or theyll disgusted by you

speak of self esteem, someone that have their asteroid medusa (149) in your 2nd are the one that silently judge and mock you. the one that try to attack your self esteem. the one that underestimate you; and will start to think "whats cool about them?" if you get great achievement in life. EVEN think that you dont deserve that and it should be them because they think theyre way much better than you 😹😹 what a bitch. beware of them try to steal your great things as a result ‼️😒👹💥💥

asteroid nemesis (128) in house shows ab whats hurt you then you develop animosity/hatred to it, check the theme of the house

1h - hatred towards self identity, hatred towards how people see you, you can hate your looks :(

2h - hatred towards possessions. You may lacks of material possessions, feel less than others in that area and you hate it

3h - hatred towards sibling, neighbor

4h - hatred towards family

5h - hatred towards "spotlight", flings, drama, childlike spirit

6h - hatred towards coworker, health (you may feel youre less healthy than others)

7h - hatred towards partner (✋💀💀), partnership itself. you likely wanna do everything alone

8h - hatred towards mystery. you hate it when someone hides something from you, not clear ab something, keeping something from you, being secretive

9h - hatred towards um.... tw religions. sorry you probably hate particular beliefs. hatred towards travelling, inlaws are also possible

10h - hatred towards public image, fame. you can hate public figures, famous person 😹😹 (im laughing because yeah we all know public figure often are not what they show on the media aka theyre fake)

11h - hatred towards friend, hatred towards what you see on internet. can be indicator of someone that dont like to use social media, or you give hate speech/comments on social media

12h - hatred towards whats "out of reach"

cardinal moons are pure souls that surrounded by "darkness". they can easily influenced by negativity from their surrounding so they MUST, i say MUST to keep good ppl around them or....bye (aka they can turn themselves into the evil)

what's with sag venus and having interest in things that they shouldnt be interested to

taurus women have this fiery strong badass facade to them, while the men looks like cute puppy (and wise???) lmao (for sun moon mars)

mutable mercury in first decan (0°-9°) why are you like to lie for no reason. are prone to say what they dont really mean. go seek better hobbies!

some of leo sun men are gay but they hide it by having love relationship with women... that's very weird (and irritating) of you

undeveloped earth venus only falls for/want to dating popular goodlooking mf even if in personality wise theyre not that best and it can leads to unfulfilling relationship 💁‍♀️

talk ab earth venus, i see them always fall for fixed sign venus (no im not referring them fixed venus as bad one that i mentioned above)

developed earth venus? they dont need to be with someone to increase their status, they simply being the (true) great person they are 🤩 (they know how to and do get the good life by themselves!!)

what i like ab fire moon is theyre so passionate but sometimes it can be too passionate where it leads to them making unnecessary drama 😭😭

water suns are prone to being delusional 😹😹

air venus stop giving mixed signals

i cant help but think ab where sagittarius in your chart shows what's "wild", "crazy" about you. thats why pluto in sag generations being seen as scary bcs the power (pluto rules ab power) they have.... 😹😹

moon-neptune aspects 🤝 say something then regret it

libra big 6 placements 🤝 attract petty ppl (and then get attacked, being seen as bad one when they just want to defend/protect themselves :()

undeveloped fixed moon 🤝 being petty

pluto in earth house (2h/6h/10h) are the brat but loved lmao

aqua mars 🤝 makes ppl amazed

air sign jupiter give the vibes of unstoppable teenagers (in a good way). see blackpink lisa (aqua jupiter), nct jaemin (gemini jupiter), newjeans hanni (libra jupiter), or another air sign jupiter you know! 😉

saturn-sun aspect are prone to experience unexpected loss :(

there's nothing more i hate in synastry than squaring to venus aspect... bc i feel unwanted there 🧍‍♀️🪓

#astro notes #astrology #astrology observations #astroblr #asteroid astrology #venus astrology #taurus #mercury astrology #sagittarius #houses in astrology #libra #pluto astrology #synastry #venus synastry #astrology chart #synastry chart #natal chart

[prosciuttoon]

Toshiro/Shuro is overhated

(mirror of my thread on twitter)

ever wanted to talk abt something so bad but u have so many thoughts so u cant even begin to organize a sentence. thats me abt shuro and its why i cant give my thoughts on him. i NEED to get this out of my system bc its takign up so much memory in my brain i need that space for thinking.

so i was really surprised to find so much hate for him even tho he seems pretty normal and rational out of the whole cast. ive deducted that its mostly abt his laios fight and that the ppl who hate him probably had bad experiences w social cues and relationships w neurotypicals bc of that. theres no way to avoid it bc its pretty much Right In Your Face that laios is ND. but thats not the only factor in why their relationship is rocky. its also the culture barrier. u have to understand toshiro was raised as JAPANESE NOBILITY ofc he would be a little conservative

also culture shock. idk if u know this but jp culture is very Mind Your Own Business like a lot of other asian cultures . ofc hes gonna be weirded out by a stranger invading his space. also his names not even Shuro. its just yt ppl not pronouncing his name right and settling for whats easiest.

img src: fan translation by savaralyn2 , i think its from the adventurers bible Complete Edition bc i dont remember it in the old one

ok you get the gist of the culture aspect of it. lets go into the ND/NT clash aspect of it. yes i understand its pretty hurtful to never be told when youre acting inappropriately. i am autistic too lmao. but you have to understand that shiro is one guy and he even does realize that repressing things is one of his fatal flaws. again. asian culture. non confrontational. that sorta thing. but these are genuine frustrations. if i were him id be annoyed too but id speak out about it. set boundaries. bc im blunt. shiros not. he was taught crazy strict manners (hierarchies, respect, politeness, etc).

his problem isnt ableism its a culmination of culture barriers, how he was raised to behave, and terrible lack of communication as thing caused by "all of the above" plus he just generally keeps to himself a lot which means repressing frustrations that will explode leading to a pathetic fistfight while hes starved, exhausted, and dehydrated. also. if he was ableist he would hate laios. he doesnt hate laios. at the end of the day, they are friends. NT and ND ppl can be friends u know. there will be rifts (like their fight) but you just have to communicate misunderstandings. theyre gonna be fine lol

anyways that was my whole spiel abt it. i think i got everything out that i wanted to? my head still feels a little full so i may add more later when i remember something

also i think its a little unfair to rule out the possibility of laios and him just being 2 very different kinds of ND bc its very common for misunderstandings to occur even then. EVERYONE IS DIFFERENT BUT WE NEED TO COMMUNICATE TO UNDERSTAND EACH OTHER! but for the sake of interpreting the Fight as a commentary on NT social rules and ND frustration, ill say toshiros NT. will we ever know? hes so far in the sidelines... youd really have to dig in the extra content to see the intricacies of his character.... please give him a chance

#dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #toshiro nakamoto #shuro dungeon meshi

[hazyhae]

getting high with nct dream 00z + mark

repost bc my settings were messed up when i first posted and i wanted to fix the formatting but this is the beginning to me writing on here :) thank you to all the lovely writers on here <3

warnings: smoking/marijuana use, suggestive content, making out, mentions of sex, teasing/mean-ish behavior from jeno, jealous haechan and jaemin

18+ content minors dni

☁︎ mark

- him in that jcc with johnny and doyoung in chicago but it’s you instead of johnny

- always initiates and smokes you out

- suuuper cuddly and laughs at everything

- like once he starts laughing you’re both done for

- starts talking about philosophical shit until you’re both lost but for some reason it makes sense (you’re just high)

- looks at you with red hooded eyes

- his legs are spread and you are straddling him on the couch taking turns shotgunning until it just turns into making out

- you just lie together feeling the other’s skin and hands are wandering

- depending on the vibe you either fall into the deepest sleep or slow lazy love making and then the deepest sleep

- will probably only go a round or two before you both start getting groggy

- will order food after if you both have enough energy but most of the time it ends in post sex cuddles and soft snores

☁︎ renjun

- one hit wonder and he’s already hanging off of you

- just stares and zones out about how cute you are and how much he loves you

- until he starts saying it out loud

- he just can’t get enough of you and you can’t get enough of him

- goes into a long paragraph of why he’s so grateful to have you etc everytime he gets high and almost tears up

- til eventually you just take that as your cue to kiss him and he’s more than happy to reciprocate

- loving cutie renjun turns into horny loving cutie renjun

- a little sloppy when high but so SO eager to please you and make you feel good

- will look at you like you’re an angel on earth when you offer to go down on him

- always stops and makes sure you finish first tho bc he WILL knock out as soon as he cums

☁︎ jeno

- will always outsmoke you i dont make the rules sorry

- he’s rolling the 3rd joint of the night and you’re in another universe while he’s just ( ◜‿◝ )

- you’re turned on when you see him lick the wrapping paper

- he notices you staring and starts messing with you

- soft touches here and there, groaning after he takes another hit, flexing his hands

- until it gets to be too much for you and your hands start to wander under his shirt

- he stops you and waits until you use your words to tell him how badly you want him

- will make a move when you’ve basically started begging

- high or not, jeno will leave you SOOORE

- mind clouded with weed and sex he leaves marks in places neither of you remember the next day

- his sex drive is already crazy but when high you both lose track of time and end up going at it til you both knock out

- aka you both are not getting out of bed for the entire next day

☁︎ haechan

- hes your childhood crush and bestie and you started smoking at the same time after learning from a mutual friend

- you both become known in your circle for being stoner besties, partners in high if you will

- super platonic until he texts you to come smoke with him and you tell him you’re at jaemin’s place smoking already

- he thought that was something special for the two of you :(

- next time you smoke he gets oddly whiny and cuddly

- “can you like, not smoke with someone who isnt me???”

- you laugh at his pouting and tease him further

- “but jaemin was sooooo fun, he has a queen sized bed and his pillows were so comfy”

- he looks at you with your sleepy eyes and dazed state

- “i really dont want anyone else to see you like this”

- haechan snaps at the thought of you not only high without him but high in a bed thats not his and kisses you

- he’s surprised at himself but even more surprised when you pull him in for a longer one

- “took you long enough”

☁︎ jaemin

- originally your plug then fwb

- got upset when you started buying from someone else and it resulted in him becoming your bf and forever plug

- always brings you his new strains to test, rolls your joints, packs the bowl, lighter always ready like a true gentleman

- royalty treatment - has everything you need prepared

- your fave snacks, comfy clothes, and protection for when you start getting handsy with him

- feels a sense of pride when you get just as good at smoking as him

- “who have you been smoking out??? 🤨🤨🤨” even though he knows there are only a handful of people you smoke with

- knows your high habits like the back of his hand so he can take one look at you and know how bad you need him

- still will tease you to say what you want from him

- he’s already mapped out his entire plan for the two of you

- sit back and relax he will treat you so good <3

- high jaemin in the zone can go for hours

#nct smut #nct dream smut #mark smut #mark lee smut #renjun smut #jeno smut #haechan smut #jaemin smut #hard thoughts #coco works #stoner!nct