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#Anyways I am SO glad to finally illustrate this scene
nonuggetshere · 1 year
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Ruh Roh!
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thenightling · 6 months
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How I got into The Sandman
The first time I read The Sandman was in 2017. First let me backtrack a bit. Back in 1999 I ran a Labyrinth role playing game on AOL and I played Jareth. I had to flesh out his personality since the movie didn't elaborate on much. I had to speculate and use sources like the novelization. As my friends and I played, a few tried to talk me into reading The Sandman. One described him as "Goth Jareth." This didn't work quite as well she hoped. She showed me some illustrations of him but that was all. I was / am a Goth and usually dressed in black. And for a while I wore an ankh pendant. I had seen one in an episode of "Are you Afraid of the Dark?" where the episode said it meant eternal life. I actually had several ankhs but one by one lost them because I'd give them to my brother as talismans to protect him against night terrors. My brother was prone to violent nightmares. Sleep disorders ran in my family. My mother slept walked, my brother had Night Terrors, and I still get bouts of insomnia and find I sleep better with an inverted sleep schedule. Anyway, I had shoulder length dark hair, dressed in black t-shirts and leggings, and wore an ankh. This must have driven my Sandman loving friends crazy because I still hadn't read it. I was told I looked like Death and "Death is so cute." But that was not how you should get me to read something. I don't care if a character is cute. Tell me about their personalities. Tell me about the horror hosts turned nightmare entities residing in The Dreaming. Tell me about Morpheus's love of Halloween aesthetics. Tell me about Morpheus being a screw up trying to set right his own wrongs. That would have appealed to me. Anyway, by 2017 I still had not read it. There were just a few things I knew about it. I knew that Lucifer of the Fox (not yet Netflix) TV show originated in The Sandman and that's where he quits ruling Hell. I knew that Death was Morpheus's sister. And she was a cute Goth girl. And I knew that Morpheus was like a "Goth Jareth." That's all I knew.
Now in 2017 my friends started a DC comics themed role playing game as some of them were very into the Arrowverse. And I really liked the Fox TV show was Lucifer. So I was to play the DC version of Lucifer but all I knew about him came from the Fox TV show. I like to research my role when I play a canon character for a role playing game. I knew he first appeared in The Sandman and I knew he was designed to look like rock star, David Bowie. So I decided to start there in The Sandman. I found out his first appearance was issue 4 so I figured, Okay, I may as well start from the beginning and work my way to him. I read it in digital format first because I didn't want physical copies of The Sandman unless I found i loved it. I fully anticipated skimming and skipping combat scenes and explosions since "all comics have those." Boy, was I wrong! I'd read many comics over the years but explosions and fight scenes were always the norm with Marvel and DC. And I always found those parts boring. So I'd skim them. By the time I got to "The Oldest Game" in issue 4 I finally realized "This was no ordinary comic book." The explosions and drawn out fight scenes I'd come to expect were no where to be found. When Morpheus said "I am Hope." I knew I had something special.
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I was thirty-five-years-old when I finally read The Sandman and I had been seventeen the first time it had been recommended to me. I went back and re-read those first four issues carefully, and with a more open mind to what I was getting into. By strange coincidence, the following day when I was reading Dream of a Thousand Cats, that was when I went to the animal shelter and adopted Loki and Vlad. I was hooked. I was now much more interested in Morpheus than in Lucifer. And I'm glad I discovered The Sandman when I did. Imagine waiting decades for the first TV adaptation. I only had to wait two years. (It was 2019 when the Netflix show was announced even though it didn't get released until 2021.)
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armoricaroyalty · 11 months
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can I just say that I love how mary has been dressing in the more recent posts? Is this her being more comfortable with/exploring her identity as a lesbian?
hehe thank you! to answer your questions, YES!, and it makes me very happy that someone noticed!
Mary's arc is very much about coming out and coming into one's queer identity. This wasn't necessarily intentional on my part! About a year ago, I had her in skirts and feminine styles, but she dropped out of the narrative for a while given the focus on Jacques and Vivi's wedding and all the attendant drama. when it came time to dress her for more-recent scenes, the feminine styles just didn't feel right for her.
It's not uncommon for people to make themselves over after coming out, and I think that's probably what Mary did, offscreen. I think we're seeing a version of her that is a lot more confident than the character we were first introduced to, and that's something that's reflective of my own experiences and those of friends -- being closeted is a tremendous psychological weight and a source of perpetual, ongoing anxiety, and coming out means getting to set that all aside. Even if you have other stressors as a result of coming out, the freedom of finally being yourself is transformative. Mary's arc was always meant to have a little bit of that, and I'm glad her personal style emerged as such an easy way to illustrate that change in her.
I guess this is also a great excuse to say that Mary is butch, and it's okay to use that term to describe her! I think people outside of queer communities sometimes shy away from that word, worried that it's pejorative, a reclaimed slur, or otherwise inappropriate for them to use, but it is not! butch is a really beautiful, loving word and the people that use it by and large chose it affirmatively for themselves. Mary is one such person :) Anyway, butch is not just a style of dress, it's also an attitude and a set of values. it's kind of hard to describe exactly what it's all about, but chivalry is generally very big for butches, and I think that's true of Mary!
Mary is also someone who would self-identify as a dyke and make a lot of duke/dyke puns but I don't think I will ever include that detail explicitly in the story because it would make the most annoying people on the planet VERY ANGRY with me. but if you have read this far, i trust you, we're cool.
also thank you so much for the question. I am so grateful for the interesting, thoughtful questions I've been getting the last few days! It's so joyful getting to answer questions and say "you are picking up what I am putting down!" genuinely, I'm gushing at the quality of my anons, i gotta have the best readers out there :sob:
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shadlad24 · 2 years
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EF#12: More, Then
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“Do you want to go back for the horse? It’s bound to be a collector’s item.”
“Only if you’re gonna pull it.”
“Nah.”
#
In a scene that was a bit too much like déjà vu for Xena’s comfort, she watched her friend dully stare into their campfire. “Hey! How about a story, huh?” the warrior princess asked, grimacing at having startled the girl and at her own hollow tone of excitement. To her horror, Gabrielle merely sniffled and shook her head.
“I don’t have any stories in me tonight,” came the soft reply. “I- They-”
Xena forced herself to laugh. “Helen’s face disappointed you that bad, huh?”
“Well, Per-” Green-blue eyes snapped into focus. “Huh?” Gabrielle echoed with much more gusto. Then she tried to grin but unexpectedly found herself even closer to tears.
Her friend leapt to her feet. “Hold on!” But Xena stalled by Argo, biting her lip.
“What is it?”
The hint of wonder in the girl’s voice convinced the woman to go ahead and make her sacrifice. Hiding what she’d retrieved behind her back, Xena returned to her sidekick. Finally dropping the thing onto Gabrielle’s lap and falling not long after it at the girl’s feet, Xena snatched her knees to her chest and then waited.
But Gabrielle did not move. “Xena?” she breathed.
“What?” The warrior princess shrugged. “It needs a comb-through after all that fighting.” Her lower lip gained deeper teeth impressions and her throat spasmed to keep in a groan when Gabrielle reverently stroked her hair once and then even more tenderly began to brush her long, dark locks. The things I do for love, she mused just before choking on the thought.
“Xena?” the girl yelped rather than asked. “Are you alright?” Immediately, her warm hand went to pat and rub her warrior’s strong back.
“Fine. Ahem. Sorry about that,” Xena grunted through a blush she was very glad that Gabrielle could not see. “Just… And then, maybe, you could… write a letter home or something.” The words were mumbled into her forearm, both wanting and not wanting to be heard.
Gabrielle put down the hairbrush, hesitated, and then slowly hugged her from behind. “Thank you,” she whispered into tresses they both knew reminded her of Lila.
A somewhat clumsy hand lifted to pat her cheek and then her shoulder. “Anytime, kid. … ’Cept for days that end in ‘Y’s. That’s the only rule.” She beamed at the same time Gabrielle did, more than relieved to feel laughter washing over her rather than tears.
.
So. Yup. Title change since no part of this collection can truly be called a “drabble.” (I’ll change everything later; ’tis nearly 7 AM my time, and I still haven’t gone to bed yet. 😑 Ahem.) This bit comes in at 400 words, 300 over the defined count. Ah well. Anyway, here are the previous installments:
#1 #1 (Truncated) #2 #3 #4 #4 (Alternate) #5 #6 #7 #8 #9 #10 #11
Bear in mind that this series intends to match the show, chapter-for-episodes. Then again, the FFLMs had the same goal but have since been abandoned due to lack of interaction for now. Ah well. That full collection up to this point (plus the bonus posts) is as follows:
Season 1: #1 #2 #3 #4 #5 #6 #7 #8 #9 #10 #11 #12 [#1]
#13 #14 #15 #16 #17 #18 #19 #20 #21 #22 #23 #24 [#2]
Season 2: #25 #26 #27 #28 #29 #30 #31 #32 #33 #34
And if you’re completely new to my stuff, then…
EF = Episodic Ficlets (as opposed to the previous acronym DDs, or “Daily Drabbles”);
FFLM = Five Funny Little Moments, a series highlighting overlooked silly things from each episode, illustrated in pictures and cracksubs; aaand
bonus posts (MFLMs) = More Funny Little Moments, summation posts showcasing additional funny moments from each episode, in half-season chunks.
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doakaptan · 3 years
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code lyoko: a hidden gem of early 2000s cartoons
pov: the year is 2009, every day you come home from school to watch an unidentified cartoon on channel JoJo; only for it to disappear and never come back to tv ever again.
Hello, it is that time of the week again. I will cut the chase for you so- Basically, this semester greatly tired me and in order to go along until the school year ends, I watch shows that evoke nostalgia to get high on the feeling of temporary happiness and dissociate for a while. I am not even addressing the monstrosity that is the midterm, father-son and the holy spirit help a bro out, please. And well, Code Lyoko is exactly that show.
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(from left to right: Yumi, Jeremie, Aelita, Ulrich <3 and Odd) (there is also William in later seasons but I don’t claim him)
Originally released in 2003 but, received international release just as it was canceled in 2007, Code Lyoko is a French cartoon that graced everyone’s televisions at least once before it completely disappeared from it. For my experience, I encountered Code Lyoko on a channel called JoJo while I was waiting for Yugioh GX to start.
At first glance, it honestly looked horrifying with how children had comically big foreheads but, the story and the visuals hooked me right in. First of all, I could look past the giant foreheads because the characters were good-looking for my 8-year-old taste and, the background illustrations are still beautiful regardless. Despite being beautiful, the places didn’t change much and we only saw the school, dorms and the forest that was behind it along with the old factory and the word of Lyoko but, the budget for the show was not the biggest so most of the scenes were used and reused again and again throughout the seasons.
I’m not going to lie the visuals were not as pretty as I make them out to be but, I was 8 years old and it was the first time that I ever saw a cartoon that had both 2d and 3d animation.
Also, I fell in love with Ulrich but I’ll get to that. 
No, no I won’t
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This is also a call-out post to me because apparently, I love everything that came before the internet and being online 24/7. Just like in How I Met Your Mother, as we are watching the world is introduced to the internet and what being online means so if I were to say that the third season is an inquiry on what the internet is and, how it works, I would not be that far off. 
( Also recently Code Lyoko was added to Netflix so yeah go stream it )
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To dive right into the plot: a Japanese, and 3 French(???) middle school students walked into an abandoned factory through a sewage canal and discover a supercomputer that had an artificial world (Lyoko) in it with another artificial intelligence in the name of Aelita trapped in it. By contacting Aelita they alerted an evil system that lived within the Lyoko called X.A.N.A that manipulates and hacks electronic devices through the powers of Lyoko. So as any other logical human being would do they materialized Aelita into the real world and created her a fake identity to make her study with them while they fight against X.A.N.A in both the real world and the artificial one, Lyoko. Then the school principal asks, "Why did you do that?" And the overly intelligent 12-year old that somehow hacked into the national security system and created a fake identity for an artificial intelligence replied, "Well I am a classic nerd that fell in love with an artificial intelligence I had to make her real at some point!".
Yeah... that was not funny.....
Anyways, so this is basically the entire plot of the Code Lyoko brought to you by a walked into a bar joke that did not escalate!
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4 friends along with their new materialized friend Aelita try to protect the world against X.A.N.A and whatever it is trying to achieve... Is it ever clear what X.A.N.A desires? I’m not sure. I’m currently rewatching the show and I’m on season 3 but I’m kind of lost on the plot since I only care about what’s going to happen between Ulrich and Yumi...
SO, the kids spent most of their time trying to defend their school, friends, or themselves against X.A.N.A and honestly it looks like a tiring job. They miss important days, quizzes, exams... man... I don’t think they are even attending school... But worry not! Lyoko has a program called "Return to the Past" and when they are successful in defending the world against X.A.N.A in Lyoko, they get to return to the past and not miss whatever that they dropped to reach the abandoned factory. 
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I vividly remember wishing, praying, crying myself to sleep to have a computer like that when I was a child. I still do actually. It would be great if I were to spend the whole day beating up various machines in a virtual world then set back the time to retake an exam that I already know the questions of. Ah, a university student can only wish...
Code Lyoko was mostly sloppy in animation due to the budget cuts that had to be made in order for the show the survive but, it made up with the heart and soul it carried. The characters are all fleshed out, just like the locations and you can sense how much thought went into each and every detail the show carried. I don’t know if it's still available on the internet but I would suggest everyone who read until this point to look into the bible of the show. It is one of the greatest bibles I’ve had the pleasure of reading through. 
The show aired in Turkey in 2009 on channel JoJo. The entirety of the first season and a few episodes from the second season were aired but it was pulled from airing shortly after to give Yugioh GX more slots since it entered its final season. One of the reasons was probably because JoJo pulled most of its audience from airing Yugioh. I would not blame them since I discovered Code Lyoko while I was waiting for Yugioh as well. 
After Code Lyoko was pulled off from airing I forgot about it and did not think about it until recently. During our first year, while I was talking Asya’s ear off about an unrelated cartoon, I randomly remembered the theme song of Code Lyoko, and all came back to me. The sweet nostalgia. I also remember making my friends at the table watch a few episodes of it during our lunchbreak. 
I am honestly glad that Code Lyoko was not one of the cartoons that got away from me. Aside from the addicting nostalgia, it gives me, it holds such a special place in my heart that I don’t think any other show can fill (maybe Yugioh GX can fill it but I will have to debate it with myself for a while).
So please, if you have time give this low-budget french cartoon a chance it will not disappoint you.
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(also just a warning ulrich and yumi’s pining is one of the slowest of burns I’ve ever witnessed so be careful while rooting for them)
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ae0nx · 3 years
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FRUITS BASKET S3 EPISODE 1 + 2 RECAP!
Yayyy! Season 3! Finally! I’m hoping this season will make me understand/sympathise with Akito and maybe even Shigure a little bit more because... honestly? My opinions on episode 2?... I might get some flack for my opinions on them...  😬
But, first: I’d like to appreciate how on the Funimation app we got a little interview/message from a few of the english dub VAs! Specifically Colleen Clinkenbeard, Jerry Jewell, Eric Vale, Ian Sinclair and Brina Palencia (Akito, Kyo, Yuki, Kureno and Isuzu). And it was nice seeing some of their opinions of the characters they play and how much they’re emotionally invested in the story. (Ian’s such a nerd ‘I wanna see giant mechs later this season’ 😂 - I lowkey stan him lol)
You should definitely check it out if you’re interested in what they would have to say!
ANYWAYS, let’s get into it...
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EPISODE 1
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I really love this depiction of the original zodiac and how you can just tell from the tone of the scene how desperately the God of the Zodiac was clinging on to these connections that they had with the participants in the banquet. How much they clung on to and loved the cat... Also, interesting how Tohru’s narrating this scene... almost like she can relate to the desperation of wanting to keep things the same... but we’ll get to that later. But also, Tohru is a God
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This new opening is beautiful, I love the way that camera moves around the still illustrations and how the general tone just hammers down that... this season is gonna be some real shit lol (which makes me nervous for the opening for the second half 😳). It’s so warped and the general blue, grey and black tone that follows around every Akito scene we get in the anime has bled into every scene in this opening concerning the rest of the zodiac. Almost... like something is decaying. It’s great, it’s just very sad lol. I love the song tho, issa bop.
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One of my favourite things in stories is when we get a bigger villain than the ‘pronounced’ villain of the story. Ren’s introduction through a manicured outstretched hand towards Kureno and Hatori is so weirdly gross in what it insinuates (especially when you apply her connection with Shigure) but again... I wanna know why she’s such an asshole to Akito specifically besides the bad mental health management within the Sohma compound. I have an inkling of what it is through memory of the manga, but like Akito and Shigure... I just wanna understand why.
Also, Ren is gorgeous and I’m sorry for simping. 
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I mean... she’s kinda got a point? She just didn’t need to be so mean about it lol. It’s pretty clear that the connection the zodiac have to each other is real and something they cannot control. BUT, wouldn’t it be easier if this connection wasn’t perpetuated by outer circles of the family and if Akito herself wasn’t so cruel about it? But, I guess Akito - through her relationship with her mother - kinda doesn’t know how to genuinely show love and affection. (Which brings me into my thoughts of how the manga ends and how I kinda... have a few problems with it which I will get to... when that comes lol)
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Lol - weeeeeeeee! (flashes back to Tohru being yeeted into the river). Is this a part of Akito’s god-like powers?!
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Again. She’s got a point! They’ve both got a point. But, they’re both the source of the problem. It’s really painful to see two mentally ill people duke it out. This whole institution is just rotten.
- I am super curious about what Akira’s relationship was like with the zodiac and if it was just as dark. I’m gonna assume it slightly already was, as the exclusion and degradation of the cat curse is already dark in itself but maybe the rest of the zodiac were just fine with how things were? I dunno if we actually will get the full backstory of Akira and his zodiac but I’m definitely intrigued
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Ok, but if four crying children came up to me after I’d just consummated with my partner to reach out at my stomach chanting ‘we’ve been waiting for you’. That would disturb me and scar me for a while too so... 😂. I know it’s supposed to be ethereal and spiritual but... dude, wtf lol
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...I don’t like how much I’m into Ren being such a Villain™  😅
- Akito being seen as a crying child by the older zodiac members has always been interesting to me because yes, they could see her as that through mainly the age gap, general empathy and the way she sometimes irrationally acts out. But, also the depiction of Gods being seen as children having tantrums has being reflected in many different beliefs and myths (especially Greek Mythology) and I just like the fact that this all powerful, all knowing being would be compared to a child. It gives you a different perspective on power.
- Is the paper note in the CD case that Kureno gave back to Tohru an extra addition or was it always there?...
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Mannnn... I really wanted Isuzu to fuck shit up after seeing Tohru so upset but... *le sigh* (outfit’s still on point)
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But, I’m so glad we get an equal Ethereal Goddess to save Tohru! HANAJIMA! We love her, we stan her. <3
- ‘Tohru will be in my custody’ 🤣 I personally think Hana’s bluntness was a kindness in her conversation with Yuki because if I found Tohru upset? I’d automatically start firing metaphorical shots at everyone in that house
- Shigure fearing Hana makes me sleep better at night <3
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Hana’s just like ‘hmm... sounds like someone I know... 👀’ I’m here for this parallel between Tohru and Kureno in the hopes that Tohru doesn’t ever get in as bad a situation as Kureno. Ahhh... Kureno... (Also, Laura Bailey was killing it in this scene as always)
- Hmmm... there’s something terribly poetic about Kyo saving Tohru’s scarf from oncoming traffic... but also, Kyo can’t help himself aha
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KWEEEN! I love this look for Uo, it’s very Kyoko. I already said this in Season 1 but I STILL need to get wool-lined jacket. Outfit Appreciation goes to her - 3.5 stars.
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<3<3<3 Friendship is magic!
- Megumi is such a good egg as always! From him going to get Uo to him being so wise with his outlook on love and how it takes time to really flourish. The best!
- This whole episode ends really nicely from Tohru’s return home and Kyo washing and returning Tohru’s scarf and Yuki being happy to see Tohru and Shigure being somewhat decent. It was nice to get a bit of relief after the tornado of emotions
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Also, this was a nice screencap! Even Kyo is smiling!!! :))))
EPISODE 2
*takes sip of wine* ...ok.
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👀... later lol
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This scene really highlighted how Tohru is starting to see Shigure and the whole zodiac curse in a new and darker way. For the first time, it felt like Tohru was a little bit more guarded around Shigure and I hope they delve more into this season. Her description of her feeling around the curse being like a ‘dark well with no bottom in sight’ is pretty spot on. Ugh.
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Aw! Is this the last we’re getting of Small!Momiji?! I love them :3 (Momiji’s shorts look a little shorter too, like he’s growing out of them ahaha)
- I haven’t found the Yuki fan club funny since their first scene in the anime but their poor disguises made me chuckle
- Yayyy! Kyo has an obsessive fan club too? ...Yay?? 😅 haha
- ‘I won’t kill them but they can go to hell’ why is Kyo speaking like me?! 😂
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The fact that we got a scene of Yuki kinda admirably looking at a group of friends (boys and girls) playfully physically interacting and he unconsciously reaches out to Machi almost like he forgot about the curse? Heart eyes... 🥰
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Again. Relatable. 😂 God, Yuki. You really are an airhead. Bless your soul. <3
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And that look says it all. Damn. Kyo’s sense of hopelessness is heartbreaking but I still stand by it being understandable considering his circumstances.
Kyo freaking out about Tohru being visually upset was super cute but I couldn’t even appreciate the fluff because the whole scene had such a morbid tone to it, despite it being so visually romantic:
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KYO’S FACE!!! 💔 Ahhh, my emotions!!!! Also, that shot from Tohru’s perspective under her bangs is great.
- Poor Mitsuru, I’d ask for extra pay just for dealing with Shigure’s ass.
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Hahah - what a great metaphor!
- Now that Shigure’s ‘true form’, so to speak, has been fully exposed all his comments that are supposed to be teasing come off so much more awful. Him insinuating Mitsuru wasn’t ‘upper class’ enough for Ritsu was awful
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COLLLDDDD. AS. IIIIIIICE. But seriously, Shigure this whole episode was cold in many different ways but I definitely felt this personally since I’ve been told something like this by a family member before... 😕 Also, it’s just gross how both Shigure and Akito are taking their own personal issues and mistrust of each other out on to other people. The curse and the institution behind the curse complicates a lot of feelings for sure, but there’s a difference between wrong and right and I get the general feeling that they both are just using the muddy waters to their advantage. Although, I feel like Shigure is taking more advantage of this than Akito but I’ll get into that in a bit.
- There’s also something about this episode that made me sympathise a lot more with Kureno in a more understandable way. But, it also makes me question the ending of this whole story and the resolutions that happen and what life for the whole Sohma institution/family looks like after the curse has broken.. I guess, I should read ‘Fruits Basket Another’ after this, huh?
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😳... Shigure is so petty, man. Really?!
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So...
I hate this relationship. I’m sorry. I know there are loads of people who like this relationship. And I’m still giving myself space for the show and the story to convince me why it’s worth it. But... I really don’t like this relationship. It’s so toxic. In so many ways. And in a weird way, this scene made me feel a LITTLE bit more for Akito than Shigure. It feels like Shigure gaslights everyone in his life but none no more than Akito, herself. I hate the fact that he keeps saying he loves her while hurting her or disregarding her. You know, almost like he’s treating her like a child. But on the other hand, I hate the fact that Akito has lowkey gaslighted herself into thinking she can treat people however she wants because she is ‘God’. I understand this is part of the way she was brought up and it seems like life in the Sohma compound has been very isolating for her so there’s been no one really to show her better (or have the confidence to show her better). But, at least I can be a little bit more sympathetic on her side than Shigure’s. I dunno... it’s just all very ugly and toxic and I’m hoping that it’ll turn around somehow.
I just hope it’s not one of those relationships that are ‘so good cos it’s so bad’.
...I’ll briefly talk about the ending theme to end this on a good note lol:
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I really like this ending! I dunno if they’re gonna have two endings and two openings for this season but this ending definitely feels like it should’ve gone in the second half as it’s almost spoiler-y? But, then again what anime opening and ending isn’t packed with spoilers lol
All the illustrations are gorgeous, I’m assuming they were drawn by Takaya-sensei herself as it seems very much in her current style of artistry but my favourite illustrations are definitely the ones shown above! <3
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Ahhh! Fin! Sorry, about this one being super long and you probably having to scroll past a whole lot on your dash 😝 As usual, I had a lot to say. I’m open to hearing from people who actually like Shigure and Akito’s relationship btw, it’s just that everything before and episode 2 just really didn’t sail the ship for me, personally. I do want to understand! Haha
See you soooon!
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TGF Thoughts: 5x05-- And the firm had two partners...
Hello and happy season 6 renewal! I think I assumed TGF would last three years when it premiered—not five, and certainly not six (this assumption was because I thought the CBS All Access experiment would fail and it would take three seasons for them to admit defeat). Now, I kinda think TGF might just run as long as the people involved want to do it. The way I’ve come to think of TGF is that, because it has no overarching arc or plot and because it is always topical, it is a show without a clear end point. That’s why it’s still fresh even though it is a spin-off in its fifth season. I could see it still feeling fresh in its tenth season if it continues to evolve and change. Anyway, here’s to season six!  
Thoughts on season five, episode five, which I didn’t really love, under the cut.
The episode kicks off with TikTok and Jay’s hallucinations... yay. I’m hooked.  
Look, before we get further into this episode, I’m going to comment on Jay’s plot as a whole. I am really, really glad this show decided to dedicate screentime to showing how horrific COVID is, and especially how horrific the disparities in treatment by race and class were. The hallucinations pay off about as well as they could. And I still do not like anything about this plot. I wish I could say I did.  
Rivi is now out of the hospital and suing Harbor Hospital. He claims that his daughter died of COVID due to their improper care.  
I’m intrigued by Rivi’s wife. She’s deaf and reads lips, and her first scene—where she reads the lips of Harbor Hospital’s lawyers privately discussing settlement—establishes that she’s a partner to Rivi and not “just a wife.” (I think this is going to also help distinguish Rivi from Bishop. Both care about families, but we all know Bishop had his wife killed.)  
Julius and Diane talk about Kurt’s case. Diane looks incredulous when Julius floats the idea of Kurt taking a deal. I almost laughed at Diane’s expression because, well, she’s talking to Julius, her former client who spent time in prison for something he didn’t do. Luckily the show remembers its history, and Julius notes this to Diane.  
Julius also points out that Diane is acting more like Kurt’s wife than his lawyer in this situation, and he won’t share things that are relevant to her personal life but not her professional life.
I am also not going to recap too much of the COVID stuff. Everything I have to say about it is going to be a variation on what I said above-- I'm glad they’re spotlighting important themes but I still don’t like this plot.
I do like that Jay notices Carmen saying “darn” instead of “damn.” She blames parental training and notes she also starts every email with “Dear.”
I do not like that Jay now hallucinates a woman who is literally credited as “naked woman” to illustrate that he has a little bit of a crush on Carmen.  
Why are they already bringing the suit before they have found any evidence of discrimination at Harbor Hospital and before they’ve looked into what type of care Pia Rivi actually received?  
Jay asks Carmen if she wants to join a group of RL staffers for drinks. Carmen says she’ll think about it. Yay for Carmen plots that bring her into the firm’s social circle.
I also don’t think I’ll have much to say about the Diane and Kurt plot. These FBI investigation plots are always the same: a lot of rehashing of the same fights, lots of new twists and turns where it always feels like the facts are changing, and a clean slate when all is said and done. I was thinking about this the other day and was like, “Ah, wouldn’t it be nice to go back to the good old days before the stakes got so high that the FBI was always investigating one of the regulars”? And then I remembered that season 1 of Wife has a plotline (which ends up being mostly inconsequential) in which the FBI investigate Peter.  
The FBI’s investigation of Peter in season 1 is so inconsequential, in fact, that it brings us Elsbeth’s first appearance and I STILL see people thinking that Executive Order 13224 in season 3 is her first appearance. It is forgettable enough that people manage to forget ELSBETH TASCIONI.
Anyway my point here is just that this feels like familiar territory and until the writers prove to me they have something new to say, about Jan 6 or about the FBI or about Diane and Kurt’s marriage, I... am not that invested.
Julius calls Diane out on being part of every conversation with Kurt. This is a good point. This is something that I would like to see the show address more. Didn’t Kurt ask Diane last episode not to be involved? Why don’t we get to see the fallout of that decision and how it impacts their marriage? I know this show is not character driven in the way I’d like it to be, and I know that is part of why it always feels fresh. It just tries my patience sometimes.  
Diane looks really red in this scene.  
LOL @ the stock footage of an ambulance pulling up in front of Harbor Hospital that clearly says “LOS ANGELES CITY FIRE DEPARTMENT.”  
One problem I have with Jay’s plot in this episode is that it feels very, very similar to the hospital episode of Evil. This is only a problem because the episode of Evil is much better. The hospital episode of Evil uses horror to show racism in the healthcare system; it’s very innovative and suspenseful. This episode wants to do the same thing... but I don’t think the writers found the exact right tone to pull it off. I can see what they are trying to do and admire that they are trying, at least.
I am struggling to articulate why I dislike this plot so much! The best I can say is that something just isn’t clicking. And, honestly, this may just be a problem with how little I’ve ever understood the hype around Jay. I’m not sure if I’ve ever said this before, but the show seems more enamored with Jay than I am, and I’m always at a little bit of a distance from the character. (I suspect it’s an acting thing, not a writing thing.)
There is also just a LOT going on in all of the Jay/hospital scenes, probably more than is needed to get the point across. It’s like the episode can’t decide if it’s all in on being horror, if it’s trying to be surreal, if it’s trying to be quirky, if it’s trying to be heartfelt, if it’s trying to be pointed, or if it’s trying to be about Jay’s emotions. I actually think this plot would’ve worked better if it were a little toned down.  
Starkey is in Diane’s office and it’s time for one of those scenes that happens in all of these FBI plots where the FBI agent is annoying and then the person they’re annoying walks away and is sassy towards the FBI. This scene feels like a mix of the one in the season two premiere where Starkey tries this strategy on Maia and some of the clunkier moments of the TGW series finale.
Danny Pino is on The Good Fight now! I’m excited to see him! He’s super charismatic; I see why they had him playing a politician on BrainDead. On this show, he insists everyone call him Racehorse.  
Racehorse is now representing the hospital, and Carmen is a little outmatched.  
Predictably, Racehorse’s strategy is to try to force Rivi to testify by bringing a countersuit. Testifying is obviously bad for Rivi since he runs a criminal enterprise and would have to answer questions under oath.  
Really long pause before the credits. Also, I don’t like this thing where we don’t get to see Liz until after the credits. I demand more Liz!  
This episode is called “And the firm had two partners” but has nothing to do with Diane and Liz and the drama about who should be a name partner. It barely even has anything to do with Liz! Misleading.  
Yay for Nikki M. James, who directed this episode!
Okay, I saw a post on Reddit about how everyone looks red in this episode and didn’t think anything of it, but on rewatch? That post is spot-on; everyone looks red. The scenes in Diane’s home are particularly bad. Kurt looks like he has an awful sunburn.
I’m glad to see Diane’s home also has a kitchen; I was getting concerned it really was just that one room.
I love Diane and Kurt but sometimes their plots rely too heavily on just being like, she’s a liberal! He's a conservative! Tension ensues!  
This episode is, sadly, Wackner free and very light on Marissa. I am fine without Wackner for an episode (sometimes a break from gimmick is nice) but I really miss Marissa’s energy.  
Diane asks Marissa to investigate something related to Kurt’s case. Marissa’s not thrilled, seeing as she is no longer an investigator and has two other jobs, but she agrees anyway.  
Diane doesn’t learn, does she? Two scenes ago she was apologizing to Kurt for meddling and revealing info he didn’t want her to reveal (the name of the rioter) and now she’s trying to get more information so she can... put herself in a position where she can act on more information Kurt doesn’t want her to act on? Cool.
LIZ!!!!!! FINALLY!!!!!!!!!!!
Rivi and Isabel want to talk to Liz without Carmen present. Isabel, wisely, wants Liz to be on the case along with Carmen. Liz protests, but Isabel insists. She notes that she could see some associates using a racial slur against Rivi... and Liz knows she has to join the case to keep Rivi on as a client. She apologizes and then fires all three associates involved in the joke.  
There’s a whole subplot about a doctor who posts TikToks that allege racism at Harbor Hospital, but also silly TikToks to boost her follower count. I do like that they allow this doctor to be both someone who wanted to do good and someone who wanted fame.
After this, though, we lose the thread of the TikTok dancer (and of the COTW, kind of) because the plot becomes more about Jay. That’s fine, though it’s a little bit clunky.  
There’s a reveal that Jay’s hallucination of Frederick Douglass is actually a fellow patient who was in the COVID pit at Harbor Hospital with him. As I said before, this is the best payoff for the hallucinations possible, but there were still too many scenes of the hallucinations.
Wow, I actively do not want to watch these scenes a second time.
NRA lady from the season 2 panel (with Adrian, Mr. Elk, the Florrick fan, etc.) is back. She is friends with Kurt, because of course she is, and could speak up and defend him. She doesn’t want to.  
God, I hope he isn’t fucking her. I can barely do another one of these FBI plots—don't make me sit through another Kurt Likes Pretty Ladies with Guns plot.
Even though NRA lady doesn’t want to speak up, Marissa has followed Kurt and identified her.
More stuff happens with Jay.  
What if the hallucinations don’t end with this episode? I like showing that Jay is a long hauler but omg do I loathe these hallucinations.  
I do like that Jay clues Carmen in on the hallucinations.  
Why is Julius even allowing Diane to tag along on visits to Starkey, and why must this gag with the dead birds keep going?!?  
More Jay stuff.  
I just don’t get why they’re asking about the Pit, where Jay and lots of other black or brown people with COVID were held, before they have any idea where Pia Rivi was held in the hospital. Are they just trying to fact-find?  
Shockingly, Pia Rivi was never sent to the Pit and actually received special care because no one wanted to anger Rivi. I... would have assumed this from the start or looked into this before bringing the suit? I know the whole point of this case is to get to explore Jay’s experience in the hospital and shine light on disparities in healthcare but I can still nitpick!  
Jay recalls hearing someone say that he was taken out of the Pit and given better care after the hospital received a call. He asks Liz if she made that call—she didn’t. She says she wishes it had been her, but she didn’t know the situation was that bad. I’m a little surprised we didn’t get references to Adrian or Marissa here. If they could’ve made a call, they absolutely would’ve. Adrian’s like a father to Jay, and Marissa is a loyal friend. Adrian has enough sway to get Jay better care, and you KNOW Marissa is resourceful and connected enough to get him good care.
I really love this Liz and Carmen scene where Carmen asks Liz for advice and Liz helps her out. I like that Carmen still has things to learn—and knows it—even as she’s a great, capable, talented lawyer.
Carmen starts to leave, then turns around and says, “I want to learn from you. I don’t... My attitude is knowing, but it’s just my attitude. It’s not who I am.” YES! I’m so glad we’re getting lines like this that make Carmen’s personality clearer. She’s not a malicious sociopath who wants to defend drug dealers and help bad people get away with horrible crimes. She’s a new lawyer who wants to be ready to handle anything, make a name for herself, and come across as untouchable. This line makes everything click into place: this is why she’s willing to represent Rivi, put forward her own strategies, and be so polite it's rude to Liz... and why she also would rather stay at RL than go work full time for Lester.  
Liz smiles, realizing she’s gotten through. “Carmen. When I was your age, I acted exactly the same way. I wanted to be perfect. So, I acted like I was perfect. Because bluff is always a part of it, but just... just let me help you, when I can. Ask questions.” I believe it. And now I really just want to see an episode where young Liz and young Alicia face off. My guess is Liz tried to project boldness and fearlessness, while Alicia tried to project hyper competence and that’s why they clashed (and why Alicia was thought to lack a “killer instinct”). Okay, okay, I’ll stop talking about Alicia.  
Racehorse deposes Rivi and it ends with Rivi beating the crap out of Racehorse. I assume this is setting up a longer arc. You don’t introduce a personality as big as Racehorse played by a Kings-favorite like Danny Pino without having plans.  
Also, it’s heavily implied that Isabel is a huge part of the leadership of Rivi’s drug empire. I’m no longer surprised by “actually the wife isn’t so innocent and is also a criminal!” reveals, but I still like this. I think it works better because there’s never any implication that Isabel is an unknowing innocent. Rivi treats her like his equal from their first scene together; she clearly is aware and okay with his prison time and the accusations against him.
We spend a lot of time on how the whole fight was caught on camera. Wonder if that will come back. (I can’t remember—did that accidental sex tape of Maia and the DNC girl ever come back into play?)
Diane threatens NRA lady until she agrees to help Kurt out.  
Jay asks Diane if she made the call to help him. She didn’t. Like Liz, she’s apologetic that it wasn’t her.  
Turns out it was David Lee. He claims it was a business decision. Sure, David. This is so fitting with David Lee’s character—he's always doing stuff like this. And he always likes to say it was about business. I think he secretly has a heart, though.  
(I don’t have much to say about this reveal since it’s familiar territory for David Lee.)  
I like that Jay’s hallucination appears to him as his friend, rather than Frederick Douglass, in his last scene of the episode. I hope that is the end of the hallucination plot.
Kurt gets the news that NRA lady is going to speak up for him. He tells Diane and says “it’s amazing how close we came to disaster right then,” as they have a drink. KURT AND DIANE, YOU SHOULD KNOW BETTER—IT IS NOT OVER UNTIL IT’S OVER. And this? Is not over! Does anyone really think this is over!? It will be more surprising to me if NRA lady actually follows through and this all gets wrapped up than if there’s a Big Twist.  
I know these writers and I know these arcs. They are meandering and full of twists and turns and add up to a complete picture that doesn’t really hold together. That’s why I’m so negative on this episode even though I’ve been positive on the arc in the past. This feels like the mid-season misdirection that it almost certainly is, and I was hoping this arc would be a little more about commentary and a little less about convoluted plot nonsense.  
Diane and Kurt dancing at the end of the episode HAS to be a reference to Diane and Will’s post-victory dances, right?  
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vampiresuns · 3 years
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Fine Arts and Equally Fine People
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1,845 words. In which Cadenza and Dante decide to have a little competition to woo Amparo Cassano, but Dante’s attention is taken away by someone else. Anatole flexes his language abilities for someone, and Milenko runs after a certain Countess.
Cadenza and Dante belong to @arcanecadenza​.
Dante and Cadenza looked at the poster announcing the play they came to see in Vesuvia’s Community Theatre. A painted poster depicting a scene with the characters of the Operetta, announcing “La Cassano'' as the main character above the name of the play. 
“That’s her,” Dante said, Cadenza still silently looking at the poster, her eyes tracing the lines of Amparo’s smile.
“It is. Let’s get in.”
The siblings got inside, showing the tickets they had already purchased, in the standing Yard. Cadenza would’ve preferred to be sitting in one of the galleries, but they had been told by the cast of the play (and Amparo herself) that many of the acts and intermissions were interactive, so a Yard position might be more fun, if they desired to experience the play in full. Besides, the play had already been going for some time, so it wouldn’t be as packed as it was during the first weeks of it. 
“Did you bring her anything?” Dante asked as they handed their coats in the coat check. “I wasn’t really sure of what the exact Vesuvian custom is, and then I thought everyone must bring her flowers, then I didn’t know who to ask and books were not very illustrative on the matter—”
“So?”
“So I brought her a self-refilling pen. Actors need to mark scripts all the time, don’t they?”
Cadenza hummed as she gave a coin to an usher in exchange for a program for the play. “I brought her tea. Asra said she always asked him to brew her some tea when she was over?”
Dante gave her a betrayed look. 
“What? He’s a friend of hers.”
“That’s cheating.”
“I would’ve brought her tea anyway.” 
“That’s still cheating.”
Cadenza decided to focus on the program, which explained the basic argument of the play, had a list of the dramatis personae and the name of whom they were played by, as well as other tidbits here and there. It was useful to take her away from her nerves. Cadenza didn’t exactly know what she was doing, even if she was confident enough in herself. It felt almost like a date without being a date (and with her brother there), not to mention gift-giving had never been her forte. She had been too busy to compose something for Amparo, but she had wanted to. Maybe she would be able to later. 
She hoped she was. She had been beautiful and so sure of herself in her flowing dress; her lips were defined and always curving up slightly, her hands soft as they had brushed with Cadenza’s, telling her how she wished she could make it to the play, not just for herself but for the play’s sake. 
“But I do hope I’m reason enough,” she had added, clearly flirting. Cadenza had told her she would be better company than her brother in a streak of competitiveness, making Amparo laugh. 
Cadenza found herself playing with the corners of the program, dog earring them; she frowned at it and offered it to her brother. 
Her brother didn’t respond. 
“Dante? Dante. Dante.” She rolled her eyes, leaning her shoulder against her brother’s. 
“Uh? Oh, I wasn’t looking.”
A blush began to bloom on Dante’s cheeks, Cadenza giving him a funny look as he began fidgeting, throwing one last glance in the general direction he had been looking, before taking the program out of Cadenza’s hands. Cadenza followed the direction of her brother’s gaze and finally saw him, recognition dawning on her. He was as blond as ever, animatedly talking to a man with dark, bronze brown curls, dressed in black. 
She couldn’t help but to give a curious look to her brother. “I didn’t know you knew Anatole.”
“You know him too?”
“Dante, I’m pretty sure half of Vesuvia knows who he is, but yes, we have tea together sometimes. Well, I have tea, I’ve only ever seen him drink coffee. He’s a friend.” She paused, in the background the orchestra still played. “Where do you know him from?” 
“The palace library,” the program was now completely forgotten in Dante’s hands. “I run into him from time to time, but we never visit the same sections. We talk sometimes, he’s, hm, very charming.”
The play began not very long after, the siblings dropping the subject altogether, even if Dante still seemed to steal looks towards the box Anatole was sitting in. The play was everything it promised to be and more: Amparo had been right, standing on the yard was never tedious, tiring. Something was always happening that took your attention away from standing on your feet — an actor would run through, someone would begin in an Aria in the middle of the crowd, leaving you to wonder when they got there. 
Amparo herself was stunning. Her voice was clear and melodic, capable of softness and drama; when she danced, the stage moved with her, the lights dancing to her lead. She transformed on stage, and Cadenza felt herself be transformed with it.
The crowd clapped, the siblings joining the ovation, and eventually the theatre began being evacuated. The siblings did as Amparo had told them too: they went backstage, announcing themselves. One of the lyricists of the Opera volunteered to go let Amparo know, and as soon as she cleared them, the lyricist came back to guide them through the hecticness which was the backstage of Vesuvia’s community theatre, asking them their opinion on the play. 
“We don’t really have private changing rooms but this is La Cassano, she’s too delightful not to let her get away with a little of this. Not that I need to tell you two, hm?” She said, cheeky. 
Amparo emerged from beyond a curtain. “Zinovia, don’t torment my guests! Only I can do that.” As a hello she winked to the siblings, holding the curtain open for them to come in. “I’m so glad you too could make it! Please, make yourself comfortable.”
The changing room, which was really just a space separated by dividers and colourful curtains, was not very personalised. Zinovia had been right when she said this wasn’t Amparo’s own changing room and in fact had space for more people. It was still cozy, if a little messy, with puffs to sit as well as a patched up armchair. 
Amparo sat in the chair of one of the vanities in the room, wearing a well loved, dark blue robe. 
“I do have my own changing room in the other theatre, so I hope you’re not put off by people announcing themselves in and out. If you’d prefer more privacy, we could always grab drinks afterward, I think I know just the place.”
With the mention of drinks, Cadenza mentioned the tea, saying it was inside the pockets of her coat. Amparo, lightly touching her arm, told her not to worry, she could send someone to retrieve the coats. “It’s nothing, I promise.” 
Before she could do anything, a voice came from beyond the robe. It was Anatole’s. “Are you decent and are you available, Lele?” 
Amparo snorted. “I’m not decent, but I’m wearing clothes, if that’s what you’re wondering.” She opened the curtain with one swift motion. “And almost always available for you two. Cadenza, Dante, these are Anatole and Milenko — my cousins.” 
“Oh, I do know both of you,” Anatole added with a smile.
“I don’t!” Milenko said cheerily. “Hi!”
While Milenko gave Amparo a quick kiss on her temple, congratulating her for the performance, Anatole gave Cadenza a friendly wave, but, to the latter’s amusement, focused on her brother. “Non sapevo che fosse tuo fratello, Cadenza. Dante, è un piacere, come sempre,” he took Dante’s hand to bring his knuckles to his lips. “I also didn’t know you two liked Opera, what a delightful coincidence. Amparo, Lenko, should we all go to get something to drink afterwards.”
Milenko had his head poking outside of the curtains, and was yelling a thank you back at someone. “I have to run.”
Anatole raised his eyebrows at him. Amparo gave him a quizzical, yet amused look “Because...?” She said.
“Apparently the Countess was discreetly watching the play with one of her sisters, and they’re leaving, so I have to go like, right now, I’m going, I’m gone.” 
Amparo’s and Anatole’s attention was taken away from the Alighieri siblings, as they encouraged Milenko and wished him luck, telling him to run fast and to go already, watching him get through the backstage crowd as he turned to yell back at his cousins that Nadia was what beauty itself should look like. Amparo laughed, and Anatole rolled his eyes.
“So,” Cadenza began, sitting on the armchair and straightening the nonexisting wrinkles in her dress, “you talk sometimes.”
“We’ve only talked, Cadenza.” 
“I win then?”
Dante paused. He looked at his sister, then at Anatole, who was talking about something he couldn’t make out with Amparo. “Okay, fine you win.”
“I did say she would find I’m better company.”
Dante didn’t have a chance to argue, because Amparo and Anatole had their attention back on them, asking them if they would like to go for drinks with them afterwards. Neither Cadenza nor Dante found a reason to complain. 
Soon enough their coats were retrieved. Dante took out the self-refilling pen, but Amparo politely declined. “I do mark up my scripts all the time, but I am sure Anatole will find that a little more useful. He collects quills after all.”
“You do?”
“I do,” his smile was inviting, bright, his eyes curious, looking between Dante’s face and his hands.
“Take it then, it’s yours.” 
With Dante’s attention otherwise occupied, Amparo took her chance to sit closer to Cadenza. She played with her own hair, taking it to the side so it fell over her shoulder.
“Thank you,” she said, leaning forward, resting her chin on her hand, her arm propped over her knee. “The tea smells fantastic. Did you enjoy the play?”
“Very much, your singing is stunning.”
Amparo smiled, her playful intensity folding over and away, a quiet kind coming in its replacement as her dark, green eyes scanned Cadenza’s face. “Thank you,” her tongue poked out between her lips when she said ‘thanks’. “I like it very much that you could come. Let me finish changing, and we’ll be on our way, is that alright?”
“Alright.”
“Alright,” Amparo repeated as she stood up, a smile reserved only for Cadenza on her face. 
In the background, the sounds of the backstage crowd of technics, direction and actors blended with Dante’s impassioned conversation with Anatole about the principles of transmutation. Cadenza was sure she had heard Anatole say before that alchemy is nothing he is very versed at, yet he seemed to be holding the conversation just fine. Perhaps she’d ask the next time she saw him, perhaps she’d forget to. Right now, following Amparo as she got behind a divider to get dressed and talk about the play and the rest of their night with her seemed like a much better prospect. 
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season 6 thoughts
hey quick question why the FUCK did you start with that
like on the one hand i’m glad that now i know what happened right after the end of “that’s too much man!”. on the other hand… ow
the mountain bojack climbs is called “metaphor mountain” God bless Lisa Hanawalt
i LOVE the way the episodes are framed… like you get one flashback to bojack drinking and you think that was the first time then it’s like NOPE he was even younger
CINDY CRAWFISH AKSHDJDSF
AND BABY BOJACK SNUGGLING UP TO HIS MOTHER… TRYING TO FEEL AN EMBRACE SHE WOULD NEVER GIVE… CATCH ME CRYING IN THE CLUB
WHO THE FUCK CAME UP WITH THIS NEW INTRO
AND THE WAY IT HAS ALL THOSE FLASHBACK SCENES BUT IT STILL ENDS WITH HIM FALLING INTO THE POOL AND DIANE AND PEANUTBUTTER CHECKING TO SEE IF HES OK AND THEN HES JSUT LOUNGING IN HIS APPLE SHORTS;;; it’s just,, he’s going back home in the end, going back to the place where he started, as if everything will go back to the way it was before and he’ll find himself stuck in the same cycles he tried so hard to escape… all im saying is, i dont think this season is gonna end well
and how it dwells on his past, everything he did wrong, all the most heartwrenching moments, and there aren’t any changes to the intro (as far as i could tell) until episode 8… nothing changes if all you do is look back.
I am LOVING the Mr. Peanutbutter we’re getting this season. I was never really attached to him before; it’s not that I hated him, just that I liked all the other main characters better. and now that they’ve had him do something really bad and reckon with that,, he’s plumbing new depths, exploring those dark places, questioning if he’s truly as happy as he says he is
and bonding with bojack??? who would have guessed
bojack keeps giving advice that is, at best, the kind he doesn’t follow himself, and at worst, bringing others down into the well of self-pity that he’s been stuck in the whole series
Someone give Princess Carolyn a break…
SHE NAMED HER DAUGHTER RUTHIE IM CRYING
Guy seems like a cool guy but I feel like they’re setting him up to seem nice so that it’s more surprising when it’s revealed he’s not. I’m probably being too suspicious, but also we don’t know much of the details about his divorce, do we? Lakeith Stanfield's great tho
EPISODE 4 WAS COMEDY GOLD
The return of Queefburglar69
I WANNA WRAP PICKLES UP IN A BLANKET LIKE A BURRITO AND TELL HER EVERYTHINGS OKAY
Oh man Pickles talking about how her subscribers will always be there for her… like… it’s not one person, it’s a cloud of people, the contents and shape of which changes, might even be completely different and unrecognizable from one year to the next, but they’re all still there as this nebulous support system. and it reminded me of what bojack said to young sarah lynn about how her fans are the only things she can count on
Todd is babey.
Also him wearing the ace colors under his hoodie!!
I knew Diane’s rationale for going to chicago was bullshit. she said it makes her feel good, but “it doesn’t matter where you are, it’s who you are,” and she still dwells on her bad feelings and hates herself just as much in chicago as she did in LA. moving somewhere else isn’t necessarily gonna change those tendencies, she has to work on it herself.
OH MAN AND WHEN BOJACK GETS DR CHAMP DRUNK AGAIN… THROWING THE BOTTLE OUT THE WINDOW WAS A WAY TO AVOID RUINING ANOTHER LIFE AND HE ENDS UP DOING THE EXACT THING HE HOPED HE WOULD NEVER DO AGAIN
was honestly kinda hoping that Dr Champ was just pretending he got drunk to show how bad bojack could get if he relapsed but at the end when he was like “stay…” that’s how i knew that shit was real.
todd is so fucking stupid i love him
ngl am kinda disappointed that todd’s confirmed white, cause i’ve kinda been picturing him as latino for a long time and i know rbw said he doesn’t want to alienate latino viewers who relate to todd. but it makes a  lot of sense, cause he always gets away with stupid shit and gets to the top of things without even having to try just because he knows a guy. and maybe the reason he’s so positive all the time is because it’s so easy for him to be, he never has to worry about shit bc of the privilege his whiteness affords him. also I love that we got to learn more about his backstory
THE CONTRAST BTWN “all the shitty things I did that I can barely even remember because I was high or drunk or it was thirty years ago” and “I remember everything. I’m sober now.” !!!!!!!!!!!!!
sharona sounds like a cross btwn princess carolyn and margo martindale
I have… mixed feelings about the haircut
Oh man Mr. Peanutbutter had a moment… he finally got that crossover episode… I was kinda hoping for a joke that went “Mr. Peanutbutter and BoJack Horseman in the same room? What is this, Philbert?” or “What is this, a short-lived show on a streaming network that got canceled because the star got addicted to painkillers and strangled his costar in a drugged haze?” but this is SO MUCH BETTER. I've never seen him cry before and the way he reacts to himself crying suggests that maybe he’s never cried before at all, and that’s why he just keeps laughing, almost like it’s forced, cause this is supposed to be his happiest moment and it’s not supposed to make him so sad. fucking,, character development
and the cold open of ep 8… you can forgive yourself and move on from your past wrongs but it doesn’t erase the things you did, the effects they have on people, and the trauma they’ve suffered. and then like, how can you forgive yourself if they never forgive you? how do you maintain that balance? why should you move forward if they can’t?
its weird to have an episode consisting entirely of guest stars but it also illustrates the extensive world they’ve built and i applaud that… also where the fuck is ana spanakopita
GINA RETURNS!!! HELL YEAH
her quote about not wanting to be defined by what bojack did to her has always stuck with me, and i feel like now, that quote has sort of come true. like, her saying that made us avoid reducing her to what happened to her, and thats why i wanted to see her come back this season, hopefully moving past it. but she can’t. it traumatized her. and everyone can see the effects of it but she feels like she can’t come forward, cause if she does she’ll be punished. shit like that changes you.
and it’s another instance on the show where someone chooses to advance their career & preserve their reputation over doing the right thing (like what bojack does with herb & sharona), but bojack does it out of self-interest, and gina does it so she doesn’t have to relive her trauma every time she gets interviewed or recognized by a fan. but even when she keeps quiet about it she’s still reliving her trauma
noah fence but what a waste of the once-per-season fuck word. youre really gonna use it in an episode IN WHICH BOJACK DOES NOT EVEN APPEAR, and not only that, but RECYCLE AN OLD SENTENCE FROM A PREVIOUS EPISODE
netflix places no limits on a show’s use of the fuck word (i think), so… fingers crossed for something better in the second part?
OH MY GOD PETE REPEAT INTRODUCED HIMSELF AS PETER ITS ALMOST LIKE HES TRYING TO FORGET THAT TIME & THAT PERSON HE WAS (im probably reading into it too much, I’m sure it’s mostly so we wouldn’t figure out who it was immediately. maybe im just like the kid with the coffee cup.)
and just… ppl describe this show as “family guy or the simpsons except the protagonist faces consequences for his actions” but bojack has gotten away with everything.
you ever just like… you ever watch a scene and feel the cliffhanger vibes creeping up and you just know it’s gonna end there and leave you unsatisfied and begging for more but at the same time that’s what makes it such a good place to end it. that was me with this. (and also the ending of undone)
the thing about this show is, it illustrates what it’s like to be a toxic person. and sure, he has it hard, but the show never asserts that he has it any worse than his victims, even if bojack himself does so. and he only does it so he can feel better about himself. he deserves a reckoning, he needs to pay for his bad deeds. but then, when you know what made him this way and what goes on inside his mind and that he wants to get better, it makes you feel for him, and forces you to ask if he deserves to get better and forgive himself and move forward. but even if he does, it doesn’t change the things he did. it doesn’t fix the lives he’s ruined.
anyway sound off if you think bojack’s gonna die at the end. hopefully not by suicide
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connan-l · 3 years
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All right, so now that I finally digested the final a little I have some random messy thoughts about Fruits Basket 2019. It got really long lol, but this has been stuck in my head for a while so I needed to get it out!
Honestly, it was a very good adaptation and I’m still in awe I was able able to see the whole manga animated. Fruits Basket is pretty important to me, as I read it for the first time when I was around twelve and it was definitely one of the series that impacted me the most — the way it tackles themes of cycle of abuse, loneliness, grief and moving forward still feel very special to me even now (I briefly wrote a post about it months ago after rereading the manga), so of course I was delighted upon hearing the reboot announced and for the most part, it didn’t disappoint. I’d never truly thought I’d be able to see characters like Rin or Machi actually move on screen in my lifetime so in a way it still feel surreal lmao (RIP to Komaki though). It was really refreshing to revisit the story in that way, especially given amusingly enough I am myself in the middle of some big changes in my life where I have to leave things behind so it felt sort of... well, I won’t say empowering per se, but quite encouraging and satisfying to watch Furuba, and especially its final, at this timing, in a way. It wasn’t perfect, there are certainly a lot of flawed directive choices that I question and unfortunately quite some important cut contents — but even at its lowest it stayed all in all good. I’m genuinely a bit stunned there are people who thinks the entire thing is worthless or a failure, because man, I have seen what a bad anime adaptation looks like, and Fruits Basket 2019 definitely isn’t one. Natsuki Takaya herself was clearly very invested and satisfied in that adaptation — I mean, just the fact she drew arts for every single episodes or for the season 3 ending really shows that I think. And while there’s a part of me who will always have a soft spot for the 2001 anime, there’s no contest that the 2019 one is the superior one and more representative of the original manga as a whole.
I believe some people really don’t realize how... uncommon it is to get such a consistently good-looking and complete anime adaptation for a shojo manga? Shojo really aren’t lucky in that prospect usually; they rarely get animated, and when they do they’re usually very bland or outright bad, or they get one short season of like 13 episodes that never receive any follow-ups — even shojo considered like classics tend to get poor treatment, unless they’re Sailor Moon of course or a long-running magical girls franchise like Precure (and even then we could have a discussion about the way Sailor Moon’s treated compared to say Dragon Ball for example, but that’s another topic entirely). So yeah it is quite awesome we were able to get this kind of anime adaptation that covers the full manga with good quality from start to finish, and I am so, so glad it exists and that it managed to revive and makes the series so popular again. (Hopefully its success means we’ll be able to get more good anime adaptation of shojo manga from now on!)
But yeah, that doesn’t mean there wasn’t problems with it and I also understand why some of the manga fans had issues. We were kind of hyped with the fact this would be a complete adaptation and in the end we only got a... sort-of-complete one lol. The art and animation stayed fine during the run (there certainly were some episodes that were uhhh, lacking in that sense, but that’s just how it is sometimes with productions and budget), but I admit I was a bit letdown regarding the direction, where it often seemed… a bit uncreative or heavy-handed. There was some very beautiful and smart shots here and there, but on the whole I really had an issue with the adaptation failing to actually take more ambitious decisions on its visual aspect, especially compared to the pretty pannelling of the manga — and when it did take these decisions it just was… kind of obnoxious and in-your-face, like the show is trying to hold the watcher’s hand (with unnecessary things like Kyo’s father record player derailing or the whole big ropes symbolizing the curse that often slapped you all over the screen, which usually just made me want to roll my eyes because of how annoying it felt.) Multiple people also pointed out the overdramatization of some scenes like the Kyo and Tohru’s confrontation at the end of season 1 or Akito and Ren’s fight which was, indeed, not very good and a weird choice. Fruits Basket is already a pretty dramatic show and these scenes are already intense, there was no need for such over-the-top theatrical display of emotions that only made them comes off as comedic. I’m probably nitpicking here but it also bothered me some characters’ expressions didn’t feel properly retranscribed (Shigure especially, whose characterization depends a lot on that, really suffered from this), or that odd habit of making some big panorama plans instead of focusing on the faces and bodies, which particularly sucks during emotional scenes (like the backgrounds were pretty I guess, but that’s not what was important here lmao).
Also that might be just a personal thing, but can I point out that the openings were pretty disappointing to me... They're not bad, but they all looked so... bland. The songs are fine but the rest feel so uninspired and it's kind of sad... I dunno, I wasn't asking for much but I just think they could've done more than just scrolling each character looking vaguely melancholic or making them walk randomly one after another :/ The endings have at least pretty illustrations and I'm okay with them (I liked what they did with Kyoko’s photo in season 3 too), but the OPs kind of feel as if they ran out of budget and ideas for them or something. I kind of feel the same with the OST as well, where they’re generally fine but were a bit lackluster, and sometimes… they were kind of played at bad times? I remember the Rin episode in season 2 were the music felt a bit out of place and took me out of the immersion, which is a shame cause it was otherwise a pretty good episode. But that might just be a me-thing here lol. The voice actors were awesome though! (The Japanese ones, at least, I didn’t watch any other dubs). I’ve said it before but special kudos to Maaya Sakamoto cause damn she’s so perfect as Akito, and Shimazaki as Yuki and Toyosaki as Rin truly delivered too. I didn’t know Manaka Iwami at all but I was really impressed by her Tohru, especially in season 3 — she really was good at capturing her character’s subtle emotional turmoils (I think she makes a better Tohru than Yui Horie too, although I admit I missed Horie a little lol.)
Anyway, on the topic of lack of ambition, that might be an unpopular opinion but there’s also the fact that I’m sad they didn’t actually... try to change or add more original scenes. By which I mean, obviously we had some changes, but not ones that were really interesting (when they’re not actively detrimental to the story). For example, I was really hoping that we’d be able to get at least one original episode focused on Ritsu (and Mitsuru too why not) in season 2 or 3, or on Kagura or Kisa; I dunno, it would’ve been a good occasion to give something more to the characters that got sidelined in the original manga, or add some moments that would’ve been nice to develop like about Akito post-cliff confrontation, but we never got that. And well, that makes sense now that we know they seemingly had an episode restriction (at least on season 3), but, yeah, that’s still a shame. Honestly in the end Ritsu’s character made even less sense in the anime, because like, it was nice they tried to adapt his introduction episode so that it feels less “you have to adapt to gender norms to feel better about yourself,” (the gender non-confirmity is definitely one of the bits that aged the less well in FB) but then they still made him cut off his hair and give his feminine clothes to Kagura at the end so why lol. (And speaking of his episode introduction, I dislike that they cut off his conversation with Tohru after the suicide attempt, not only for Ritsu but also for Tohru cause it is one of the small instances bringing up her issues that is set up early on and that is crucial to her, but I’ll come back to this later.)
And now about the biggest problem to me being, the cut content and episodes rearangement. So, just so we’re clear, I definitely don’t think an anime adaptation needs to be a page-by-page adaptation of the manga to be good. Every decent adaptation needs to have changes, and the ones that tries to just follow the source material without any heart often tend to get pretty bad. So changes are good! Cut content are needed sometimes. But in Furuba 19, it really... wasn’t the case.
And the most unfortunate thing being that the one suffering the most from this is the show’s main character herself, Tohru.
So, obviously other characters also got done dirty by this; Yuki and Machi’s relationship was so incredibly shifted in the background and rushed it’s almost funny. I’m one of the people who thinks that, while I do think they’re cute, I definitely agree on the fact their relationship was a bit underdeveloped in the manga — and that Machi’s character especially suffered as a result by being a bit reduced to just "Yuki’s love interest" when she was a character with so much more to offer (and as a whole I also tend to agree with the fact that Yuki probably didn’t need a romance at all and that his arc is more meaningful while focusing on his platonic relationships, but that’s another topic entirely) — but man, if the manga already underdevelopped them, then ohhh boy, the anime just completely dropped the ball. It feels very odd because to me it seemed like season 2 was taking their time with setting them up, so if they knew they had only 13 episodes for season 3 then they should’ve started the changes there; instead we got 1 nice Yuki/Machi/Kakeru episode, and then it’s like "Yep, they’re in love, just trust me." (It does makes me wonder if season 3 wasn’t originally supposed to be longer but then got restrained because of budget or covid or something…) Kakeru also very much suffered because of them cutting off his girlfriend and his complicated relationship with Tohru… Now, to be honest, I’ve always found the Kakeru/Komaki/Tohru subplot pretty... contrived and useless, and Komaki’s not so much a character more than a device for Kakeru’s development, but it does have some good moments relevant to the story’s themes (I like the ‘‘you can’t play suffering olympics with people’s pain’’morale) and it is important to his character (and Komaki is cute, I admit), so it was still sad they shafted it entirely. (Also I kind of like the tense relationship between Tohru and Kakeru. The fact they both seem to not appreciate each other even afterwards feel sort of refreshing even if it’s never explored unfortunately orz.) I was still surprised they didn’t actually try to make a Komaki cameo at the end? Cause I think it would’ve fitted and Kakeru’s girlfriend had already been mentioned in season 2 but... for some reason they... didn’t. (Mayyybe we’ll get an OAV like with Kyoko and Katsuya? Who knows.)
One scene that was skipped/rearranged that I’m very bitter over is the whole Tohru/Kagura confrontation and Kagura/Rin scene — it might not seem like much, but the moment of Tohru refusing to forgive Kagura is very important, and I was pretty annoyed they turned Rin’s trauma response to Kagura’s violence and her subsequent apology/hug to a gag, it legit felt tasteless. The Tohrin scene they removed at the very end too was frustating; it was great they managed to fit in the "Rin doesn’t want to forgive Akito" bit at least (I was afraid they’d cut it off entirely), but it was so essential for her to say to Tohru, not to Haru and Momiji (plus the way they put it in felt very random and awkwardly placed there, when they were initially talking about Tohru before orz). OH AND the Akito/Hana friendship too! Yeah I know it’s not a Big deal but I absolutely love the little glimpses of their friendship and it’s very important to me so I’m disappointed over them not including the ‘Ah-chan’ scene… (It was kind of weird that the show sort-of implied Hana and Kazuma got together too cause that’s… not the vibe at all from the manga… oh well.)
Most people I’ve seen generally only bring up season 3 regarding the cuts/rearangement because it’s the most obvious and the biggest offender, but I personally think there were already problems with season 2 and 1. At first glance I didn’t have much issue with some of the rearrangement, because early Furuba can indeed be pretty episodic, but thinking back on it as a whole I think it might’ve been better to leave some stuff, like Hana and Uo’s episodes for example, to season 2 (I do wonder if they did this specifically so the reboot would offer original content and differ from 2001 early on...) and cut off other not-so-important things from S1 & S2 — because as a result season 2 kind of suffer a bit by being The Yuki Season, which, for as much as I love Yuki, did end up being a bit annoying and made his development feel less natural and gradual, as well as the fact it sidelined the other characters a little and left them with not much conclusion in its final. So this added to how much they ended up cutting in season 3, it makes the show as a whole feels really unequal. I think they did overall a good job in season 3 with what they had, and they really nailed some of the dramatic and Kyoru moments (the sheets scene, cliff confrontation and post-hospital confession were practically perfect), but it is a shame that it ended up as an extremely marathoned emotional roller-caster rather than a more well-paced watch that we would’ve had if it had been 20 or so episodes. (I know others argued that season 3 was what it was because there wasn’t enough content left to cover for 22 or 24 episodes, but I disagree and even if there weren’t, it would’ve been the perfect occasion to add original episodes then. But I think it was more of a budget and Covid issue personally.)
But anyway, all of this isn’t actually what I’m the most annoyed with (and YES that’s a already a lot lmao), those are stuff I can live with, but like I said earlier the most problematic is what they cut off from Tohru’s character. And that indeed includes her parents’ backstory.
So, just so I get this out of the way; yes, I do understand why people were relieved to not see Kyoko and Katsuya’s relationship play out on screen, and yes the age gap and teacher-student thing is creepy and I do kind of wish it hadn’t been written that way. (Though I was a bit amused by people who thought we didn’t get the backstory because of the questionable age gap when, uh... you know I very much doubt the anime industry has an issue with that. Like, to start with, we wouldn’t have had Uo and Kureno’s romance if that was the case (even if Uo and Kureno is less problematic, it’s still the same basis of a underage high school girl/20+ adult man relationship), and second there was a literal romcom anime about a high school girl and an adult man that was broadcasted at the same time as Furuba season 3 lmao. So nah, it wasn’t there the problem to them, it was just time and episode restriction, which was pretty much confirmed with the announcement of the OAV focused on them.)
So, Kyoko and Katsuya is definitely Problematic and I agree on their relationship being uncomfortable; however, I’m a bit baffled that people were literally cheering on not having that part in the show, because it is... it is not just like a small bit of family trivia, it is Extremely important and actively essential to Tohru’s character and Fruits Basket’s themes and narrative as a whole. It’s very important to understand Kyoko’s character, of course; to humanize her and finally present her as a very flawed person and not just the idealized mother that Tohru project upon her, and it is extremely important simply to understand Tohru herself as well; to understand where her way of thinking, her trauma and attitude stems from, and this in a way that just isn’t possible to see with the little fragments of that flashback we got or the bits of Kyo and Kyoko’s interactions.
See, Tohru’s character is principally constructed around two things; her grief over her mother and her almost-pathological selflesness and people-pleaser needs that comes from her abandonment issues and loneliness, and her arc is very much about letting go of both of these things and finally moving forward and letting her life change. There’s this perception of Tohru I see sometimes that she’s not a very interesting character especially compared to others like Yuki or Kyo, or that she ‘‘stays the same kindhearted, naive girl from start to finish,’’ and while I deeply disagree with this I know where it comes from. The thing with Tohru is that she is firstly an extremely emotionally repressed character, and so a lot of her depth and development is made through small, gradual details scattered throughout the manga. It’s done in such a way that except for some obvious scenes those small, apparently insignificant moments are easy to miss or disregarded, and unfortunately it is a lot of these details that the 2019 anime cut, or rearanged in a way that feel less impactful or makes less sense; such as, like I pointed out earlier, her conversation with Ritsu after his suicide attempt. As I’ve seen others point out, this result in altering Tohru’s portrayal and rendering her character mostly about her romance, undercutting and downplaying all of her small, subtle character moments and developments, and miss a bit the second part of the story where the narrative actively challenge the ‘savior/therapist/mom’ that other characters and Tohru herself projected upon her.
And as a result it also means undermining things like her parallel and relationship to Akito, which idealistically should’ve been slowly built up throughout the last season but because of how rushed season 3 was in the end felt a little flat. (Akito’s character in general had some issues also because of the unequal pacing and rearranged scenes, though admittedly I think this was also an issue present in the original manga.) Kyo’s character and his romance with Tohru is the one element that managed to get out of this mostly unscathed (although Kyo also does suffer a bit from it), but because of what was removed from Tohru’s character it still inevitably impacted them by making their characters as individuals lacking. It’s not like it is a complete failure, mind you; I think the anime at least did a decent job at showing Tohru is Not Okay even at the beginning in season 1 (they certainly did a better job at it than the 2001 one lol) and managed to roughly portray her issues well enough overall, but it is just… lacking in the subtlety and nuances that, to me, makes her character and writing really special and unique.
(This post explains what I’ve tried to say here in a much more eloquent and better way that I ever could, and this all put into perspective what I basically love so much about Tohru and Fruits Basket in general.)
And, you know, it would’ve been sad but comprehensible with any other character, but here we’re talking about the story’s literal protagonist, which is why it is the part of the adaptation that makes me feel the most bitter. Tohru and her story is truly amazing and well-written, the thing I was looking forward to the most with this reboot — and while I do understand the episode restriction and I do believe they still did their best with what they had — her arc still deserved to receive a full proper adaptation, not a kind-of-half one.
So, yes, I am at least glad they’ll adapt Kyoko and Katsuya’s story in OAV, but the fact that it will never be included in the actual main narrative is still actively detrimental to it, and it will never have the same effect that if it had been played out before the Kyoru sheets scene where it should’ve been. (I hope they also won’t cut the fact that their story is narrated by Kyo, because that is also a very important detail for both Kyo and the story, but I have the feeling they will…)
Welp, that was quite a long, messy rambling. Not sure if anyone will actually read all of it but if you did then congrats lol. I feel in the end I’ve been really harsh and negative with the reboot… I do love it a lot! If someone asked me I would wholeheartedly recommend it (though I guess I would still argue to read the manga first if you really want to experience the story in all its nuances). I think they truly did an impressive job — even with season 3, which a lot of its episodes were beautifully done and did make me tear up a few times lol. I’m just sad it couldn’t actually offer a better, more nuanced delivery of the story’s depths and of one of my favorite manga protagonists that means a lot to me. But that’s an adaptation that so many fans wanted for years and I’m happy and grateful it’s here cause Fruits Basket deserved at least that much!
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bthump · 3 years
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If you could rewrite Berserk (or maybe parts of it), what would you change? I love the way you interpret this story. The way you interpret this work, makes it so much more powerful, than how some other side of the fandom understand it.
thank you so much, i’m glad my interpretations resonate with you!
tbh my ideal version of Berserk is basically a much shorter story that begins with the Black Swordsman arc and ends on this shot:
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more specifically I’d open on a similar panel of Guts fighting ghosts, seen far above, and alone. I’d include a version of the Lost Children arc in the Black Swordsman arc after chapter 2, between Snake Baron and Count Slug, also introducing Skull Knight. I’d make some kind of pointed visual comparison between Skull Knight and Vargas, illustrating that they’re both similarly consumed by revenge and cautionary tales for Guts.
This version of Lost Children is even sadder and more depressing - Jill and Rosine’s friendship is highlighted as positive, the scene where they fly together is beautiful and uplifting, and it’s suggested that if Jill did stay with Rosine her influence could remake the creepy Land of the Elves into less of a horror show and more of an actual place of refuge sans monster transformations. Yk, Rosine is open to Jill’s suggestions basically.
Guts still has his humanizing moments with Jill but he’s shown at his most monstrous too when he kills Rosine. Jill returning to her abusive home isn’t uplifting or hopeful, it’s tragic. Guts’ “this is your paradise” bit isn’t an objective statement, it’s a sign of Guts’ depressed cynicism and increasingly monstrous mindset. Oh and despite the Land of Elves being fucked up (in my version it would at least be sliiiiightly less fucked up), Guts destroying it would have some thematic echoes in the destruction of the Hawks. Maybe the raid we see on the Hawks after they’re declared traitors involves a lot more fire and forest burning down. Maybe some of the elf monster kids try to save each other and one of them gets Guts with a thrown knife lol a la Judeau protecting Casca. Idk, something.
Also the Peekaf story is cut, as is Rosine’s tragic flight home, as emotional as it was in the manga. She dies with Jill here. I’m kinda downplaying the dreams as escapes theme wrt Jill’s flight with Rosine and the land of the elves because I don’t think it works in this arc due to, yk, the alternative being abusive homes.
Afterwards ghosts still taunt Guts about becoming like Femto, but without the “your friend” description bc that gives too much away. Skull Knight picks up Rosine’s behelit and has his suggestive “hm this could be Guts eventually” internal monologue even though Guts doesn’t have a behelit yet.
Count Slug arc is essentially the same. I would turn the fetus into some kind of pathetic looking misshapen dog demon (like the Beast of Darkness but in much less cool form, bc that’s essentially what the fetus was before Miura overwrote it) who follows Guts around and reminds him of what he’s in danger of becoming. Guts picking up Slug’s behelit is the last shot before the Golden Age begins.
Theresia is a more angry version of Jill, and they’re both examples of Black Swordsman Guts ruining lives wherever he goes, along with the zombie girl in chapter 2 - it’s all variations on a theme of Guts sort of creating mini versions of himself bc of his traumatized lashing out. Zombie kid is most metaphorical in becoming a monster after listening to Guts’ cynical take on dying by the sword; Jill goes back to her abusive Gambino-esque father when her potential escape, Rosine, is killed; Theresia swears vengeance when Guts kills her father who couldn’t sacrifice her to save himself.
(this mini me thing would parallel Slug and Rosine’s abilities to create their own monsters, btw. Cycle of violence kinda thing.)
Everything else follows the manga up until Guts and Casca start getting romancey. I’d cut that out completely. They can have a burgeoning friendship but there’s no romantic undertones and no sex and no meddling Judeau etc. Casca still fights Guts and stabs him and yells at him about Griff but there’s no sucide attempt. She still confesses to her crush on Griffith because it’s a good griffguts parallel, but definitely doesn’t say she was lying to Guts and herself when she said she wanted to be Griffith’s sword. But I do want that “Griffith’s not a god... and I am a woman” line in there because it’s such a good parallel.
Guts monologues about his newfound dream to Godo in a flashback during the Wyald fight instead, then does the waterfall log thing and breaks several bones, then gets told off by Erika who points out he just wants to fight Zodd again. I’d maybe move some of Godo’s lines about Guts metaphorically being a nicked sword to here too. Also show the dragonslayer leaning up against a wall lol.
Guts still tells Casca at some point that he fully intends to leave again. Maybe during the rescue mission. Because yk we still need that moment where Griffith overhears someone telling Guts to leave.
Finally the last change is that Casca dies with Judeau, Guts manages to survive until Femto wakes up, they have a moment staring each other down, there’s a clear parallel to a moment of Guts’ childhood - I’m thinkin Guts asks “Why?” and there’s a shot of Femto, shadowed so we only see one eye, a la:
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Apostles begin to descend on Guts chanting shit like ‘sacrifice’ and ‘ours,’ (comparison to bb!Guts facing down the wolves btw, Guts is resigned) and then Skull Knight appears and rescues him and we get that last shot of Femto.
The End.
The implication is that Guts and Griffith are alone and monstrous without each other, violence begets violence, relationships are a positive contrast to that but they keep fucking those up, etc. There would still be a slight ray of hope though in comparisons to Jill/Rosine and Slug’s inability to sacrifice Theresia, and Femto lowering his hand, showing that, yk, even monsters have potential. It would be a very thin ray though bc Guts killed those monsters lol so the implication would still be that Guts is kind of doomed to roam the world alone with his sword like Skull Knight or Zodd.
Also... I’d fuck around with the world building and astral plane stuff because Guts and Femto being metaphysically separated doesn’t work for this. I want that thin ray of hope even if it necessarily comes to nothing lol, if only because if I was alternate universe Miura I’d want people to write Femto/apostle Guts fanfic. So no mention that the Godhand can only appear when someone uses a behelit, maybe even imply somehow that Femto could show himself to Guts at any time, he’s just snubbing him.
Anyway yeah, ty for asking.
also if you’re interested I once wrote a very long and involved post here about what I’d change if I had free range to adapt Berserk if you want a longer answer with more details that follows the actual story much more closely (including a less involved take on my answer here lol).
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yume-fanfare · 3 years
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hi i am that anon from like 29th Dec (last dang year) who said i read ur tsuki no hime and loved it and that u understand Aizou. i have read more of ur stuff since then and now i NEED to ask you for writing advice, on both characterization and general writing tips since I didnt mention it before. Sorry about that! i just forgot i sent an ask and i do not get notifs at all (or does anon asks not get notifs?) Also, ART STUDENT! That's why the nice art and art leaning!! I feel smart for sensing it
oh yup, tumblr doesn't send notifs for anon asks! but i'm glad you did see the answer anyway
this post is hideously long, so answer under the cut!
so, on characterization: it is mostly a matter of what would they say, rather than what you want them to say. the joke about "the characters do what they want to" instead of what the writer wants is pretty much true if you want them to be in character lol (that's why sometimes a little bit of OoC isn't too bad)
checking the source material is the most important thing: look at prior similar interactions the characters have had and how they reacted
this is kind of hard with LIPxLIP, as there aren't that many translated texts about them but with honeyworks the most canon and reliable thing to use as reference are the mvs. the mvs are drawn in a way that can pretty much be understood even if you don't have the lyrics, and sometimes it's even better if you can't read them, to properly focus on the images better
look at their expressions closely: while aizou is always explosive in his anger, yuujirou often has a more indifferent expression. so, when they fight, aizou is probably the one to blow up first while yuujirou maintains his composure better. it's kind of the classic "this was only a brief passing panel but i am going to expand on it" www
but the thing about fanfiction is that it's always a bit of a character analysis in itself. you don't start writing having already a color-coded folder of possible situations and reactions a character would have for each setting. you just throw the characters in a scenario and then think from there onwards, and eventually you'll be able to have the folder of situations and what you think their reactions would be like. (though, this links back to the prior point, if the characters have gone through a similar situation in canon, use that as guide! plus, finding little references to canon when reading is always fun)
for general writing, i'm going to mostly talk about my own experiences and process! i'm in no way a professional though
the basic is reading a lot. not just books but also fanfic. in fact, since you're writing fanfic, i Encourage you to read fanfic. even if your story ends up novel length, the way of treating the story is different from that of an actual novel. for example, because you're working under the premise that everyone knows the characters already. the general style of fics is different as well.
in fact, the style is the main reason i'm saying this slfkslfkslkf
read a lot of stuff and find a style you like. think of it as sewing together pieces from here and there to make a frankenstein amalgamation: this person's metaphors, the comparisons from here, the descriptions from there
personally, i adore the "long one-shot with a long title formatted (like this)" fics that are mostly feelings and descriptions and as little dialogue as possible, and some that occasionally play with the "show don't tell" rule, and some months ago i read a book whose descriptions amazed me because you could feel what the character was focusing on the most, rather than being general descriptions of the situation (i actually have a lot of thoughts about descriptions but that's a post for another day). but also i really like dialogue and plot-driven stories, descriptions can get boring and before trying to break rules, you have to be really good at following them
but, let's go step by step: developing an idea
for this i'm going to mostly reference the multichap i finished a while ago as an example
i started with just a few vague concepts in mind: non-idol au with aizou who does some sport and likes music but is insecure about his singing and yuujirou who does some music related thing and encourages him to sing in a way that's somehow related to the hozier song to noisemaking (sing), because it's what inspired me to write in the first place
then, from then onwards i wrote down what would happen in the first chapter of the story bullet-point-list-style, including things like the roommates part or the clubs the boys were in (at first yuujirou was in the choir club lol the change was a last second decision that idk why i took) and then bits of dialogue here and there that would be The Turning Points. those first dialogues were for the fight at the end of ch 1, the apology-date in ch 3 and then some vaguely unused ones for the "yuujirou encourages aizou" part, as those were the first key moments i thought of
because, since it's enemies to friends to lovers, an important aspect was character development
not all fics have character development bc not all of them are long enough (if you're aiming for short and sweet then there's no need). but if they do, i recommend you write down how the character was at the beginning of the story and then how they were at the end and then fill in the middle later, think of what those key turning points that made the character change were (the more little things you add, the more gradual it'll be)
samishigariya illustrates this very nicely: the song starts and finishes with the same lines, but the ending ones feel more light-hearted. the beginning has pre-arisa ken and pre-getting-along-with-yuujirou aizou, when they were the lonely people the title mentioned, and the ending, when they're not lonely anymore. the in between can be seen in depth during the other songs: ken before arisa was a playboy who didn't take love seriously, but after meeting her he realized that games were not all there was to love; and aizou used to be quite cranky and high-key a loner, but then he "meets precious things and knows of love". i will not elaborate on that because this isn't an aiyuu post but Oh You Know
for the fic, aizou would go through that same process, more or less: someone who doesn't really form meaningful connections with people but who, in the end, would end up having quite a bunch of people who care about him as his relationship with yuujirou advances too
since the relationship was the main focus, i wrote a very simple outline for how it would develop throughout 5 hypothetical chapters that was just: 1. civil w each other but mostly bad > 2. bad > 3. half friends > 4. pining > 5. date
and then with that in mind and the bullet point list, the final basic outline ended up like this:
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there were scraped ideas and ideas that made it in later, but i believe having a simple outline, a bare skeleton to add things to, is important. stories need continuity, development requires a prior buildup
it's especially important in multichapter fics where you post as you write, you need to have a more or less clear idea of what's going to happen because you can't ignore scenes you've already posted
shorter stories don't need it as much, you can think as you go, but it's still helpful to know where you're going with things to avoid getting stuck
and, on getting stuck: don't be afraid of deleting things. if you can't figure out how to continue things, then delete the situation and start again. it might feel like you'd be wasting time but in the end, it is so much better than being stuck on the same scene for weeks
in fact, you don't have to write in order. jump to the next scene and you'll figure it out later. you Can write the scene you want to write and then build everything else around it
it's normal to write a scene and then realize it would make more sense later in the story, or that it would be better if you added another scene earlier, or sometimes you just find it easier to jump from one part of the story to another. rely on your outline to keep track of what you've written, what you have left to write and what's the best way to arrange your story. make your story understandable
which bring us to editing
there's a lot of much better posts on editing stories, but yeah ctrl+f is your best friend: don't repeat yourself too much. and be sure to vary sentence and paragraph length, as well as sentence structure, to give dynamism to the writing
now, i've mentioned before the show, don't tell rule, but i'm going to talk a bit more about it because it's quite important
once again there's a lot of posts that explain more in depth what it is, so i'm not going to expand too much on that, but, very basically, try to avoid things like "then some time passed and they became friends". explain it: what happened exactly? how did they become friends? if it's important, show it to us, instead of summarizing
since things like these make the story longer, it also gives room for more development and proper explanation for things that happen
for example, the fic was originally going to start with them already in the room, and the whole situation would have been explained in a single paragraph somewhere, but by actually adding the scene where they first arrive to the dorms and argue with the lady at the main desk, the story flows better and it let me actually describe their first meeting
and uuuhhh i think that's all? this took super long to write i hope i didn't forget any super basic stuff lol
i want to add that for enemies to lovers i greatly recommend this post bc it's super good but yeah i think that's basically it, if you have any more specific questions just shoot me an ask
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miss-m-winks · 3 years
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Didn’t actually finish nanowrimo but that's fine, lol.
Anyway here's the first chapter super rough rough draft.
The sun brushed against the treetops, sending shadows and orange light across the ground. It illuminated the drifting smoke emerging from a hole in the roof of a huge wooden longhouse, carrying the sounds of conversation and laughter into the air. Beside the enormous round entrance, Morianten waited, his black dog Sitla ever patiently sitting nearby. He shivered and pulled his feathered wings tighter around his body as the autumn evening sent a chill wind rushing past. The black costume he was wearing for the funeral dance left his legs exposed, but at least he could tuck his arms in beneath the loose top.
The longhouse behind him was crowded with orcs and a surprising number of dwarves, alongside many other local community members of varying races. They were waiting too, for the return of the corpse bearers. Morianten could feel the warmth of the indoor party on his backside, the fire at the center of the room combining its heat with that of every body there. But he wanted to be the first to welcome back the corpse bearers, to greet his friend K'arik, grandson of the deceased He'esh, and a fellow dancer.
As the sun dipped lower, Morianten began to stomp his feet quickly on the ground to keep his legs from getting too cold. He sighed with shaky breath, turning towards the door for just a moment when he finally noticed movement on the road leading to the longhouse. The corpse bearers and funeral guide were back at last, just in time.
The funeral guide could be heard even at this distance, the rattles and bells on their raven mask and walking stick jingling with every step. Behind them, the corpse bearers could be seen in their wolf masks and fur cloaks, six orcs walking two by two. The corpse bearers began to remove their masks as they drew closer to the longhouse, breaking formation and walking more casually to join the party within. K'arik jogged forward to greet Morianten, hooking his wolf mask on his belt to free his hands and sign a hello.
He was nearly twice Morianten's height, grinning around his tusks as he approached his little feathered friend.
"K'arik!" Morianten smiled as he moved his hands, angular and snappy, the name sign that meant 'tree breaker'. "I am glad to see you again."
"I am glad to see you too, Mori." Morianten's name sign fluttered out from the orc's fingers, roughly translating to 'little dancing bird'. "You should be getting ready to dance. Let us walk together." He gestured for Morianten to come along, making his way to the dancers' entrance.
"I wanted to wait for you." Mori signed back, then quickly signaled his dog Sitla to go into the party and join his wife, Evelyn. Sitla's unnatural milky white eyes blinked once in acknowledgement before she slinked off like a shadow.
"Your dog still makes me nervous," K'arik signed when Morianten caught up to him, "she is too smart." Morianten laughed, then sighed in relief as they entered the warm longhouse.
"She really is." He signed back. They moved into the changing room where the wolf dancers were already nearly finished changing into their costumes. Eight of them in all, mostly orcs but a few were dwarves and there was one elf.
K'arik took off his fur cloak and started to put on his costume, all white and blue with many streamers and glittering beads. He would play the role of a spirit, since he was a close relative to the deceased.
Morianten was already wearing the main part of his costume, the black hide and feathers covered his front torso loosely so he could tuck his arms away, with only some close fitting shorts and a long strip of decorated cloth hanging from a belt to cover his legs. His feet were wrapped in black hide as well, little bells hanging from the ankles. He found his mask on the shelf, carved and painted wood made to resemble a raven skull, black hide and feathers hanging off the sides to hide his real head.
"Mori, need help with your wings?" One of the wolf dancers called out; it was K'arik's cousin Kr'resh, all dressed to dance aside from her mask.
"Yes, thank you. It's hard to reach the back sides on my own." He pulled out the bucket of charcoal powder and started to carefully work it into the sky blue and black striped feathers of his inner wings. Kr'resh and one other wolf dancer Morianten didn't know came over to start working on the deep green and beige striped backs of his wings, as well as his tail. Morianten glanced up once to see that K'arik was getting help with his face paint and the bark cloth shroud that he would wear over his costume.
As the dancers all finished up their last minute touches, they could hear the funeral guide out on the stage finishing the opening ceremony. Half of the wolf dancers left the room to go through the hall behind the stage and wait at their entrance, with K'arik following because he would open the dance at center stage. Morianten dusted his hands off on a damp cloth and put on the raven skull mask, thanking the other dancers who helped him color his wings. He stood ahead of the wolves, tucking his arms into the loose top of his costume as he waited for his cue.
The funeral guide, an elderly orc wearing a more elaborate raven costume than Morianten's, left the stage and the room was silent. K'arik moved forward out of the shadows, seemingly appearing from thin air all covered in the bark cloth shroud. He couldn't hear any sound but the deepest rumbling noises, but he knew his cues well and began his dance as he felt the vibration of the largest drum move through him.
The shroud was dropped, an empty husk of a body as the spirit remained standing, the white cloth and face paint almost glowing in the firelight. K'arik turned one way and the other, stepping rhythmically and moving his arms as if to search for something in the distance. Morianten took the beat of the music into himself as he counted out his cue, bouncing softly on his heels.
Then he moved forward onto the stage, stepping quickly and bobbing his head with the beat. He hopped, he folded his wings and then unfurled them forward for a brief moment, the bells at his ankles and the metal feathers on the sides of his mask jingling with every motion. He was the raven, guide of spirits and scavengers alike. Charcoal dust fell off his feathers in little clouds with every movement.
He turned a circle around K'arik, who turned in the opposite direction. Morianten bent down to make the raven mask poke at the bark cloth shroud a few times, did the circle in the other direction, and then poked the shroud again. He twirled to face the rest of the room and bent his head low, then stood as all as he could, shaking his head to make the metal feathers clatter loudly. His wings flared out straight and brushed the floor each time he bent low and then raised toward the ceiling each time he stood back up.
The wolf dancers called out in howling voices as they emerged from the side entrances, called by the raven to the scene of death. Morianten twirled around again, flaring and flapping his wings. He turned one last circle around K'arik and then gestured for him to follow, crouching low and hopping to the back of the stage with his wings close to the ground. K'arik followed with toe-first steps, gliding back into the shadows behind the raven figure with the wolves arriving at the center stage.
The wolves leaped and crouched, coming together at the middle to circle the abandoned shroud, sometimes twirling as they circled. Their dance appeared chaotic and disjointed, but it was perfectly synchronized and totally in line with the rhythm of the drums. The large circle of wolves divided and weaved into two smaller circles, moving in opposite directions. Circles in circles, separate and then weaving chaotically only to return to circles again.
They picked up the shroud and passed it around, taking it apart and attaching it to their own costumes. Life consumes death, dies, feeds the next living things. Morianten loved this part of the dance. The wolves moved in such a mesmerizing way, illustrating their symbolic role so beautifully.
But he couldn't just watch and enjoy it, he had a second cue to watch for. At a certain point, he snuck back onto stage and carefully worked his way through the spinning circles of the wolves, crouching at the center. The wolves stopped their whirling dance and all dropped to the floor at once while the raven leapt to his feet and raised his wings as high as he could stretch them.
The funeral dance was over with the huge room full of people stomping and shouting their approval. The dancers all stood and bowed, then left the stage quickly to remove their costumes and join the party. Mori was using a damp cloth to wipe the charcoal from his wings when he felt the gentle double tap on his shoulder from K'arik. He turned with a smile and waved a hand at his friend to signal he was ready to chat.
"Thank you for dancing with me tonight," K'arik signed, "you make a great raven."
"I am always honored to dance the part," Morianten replied, "especially when I get to share the stage with such a dear friend." K'arik grinned.
"Do you need help with your wings?"
"Yes, thank you." K'arik knelt down and grabbed a second cloth to wipe the charcoal from Morianten's feathers. Morianten was in a hurry to join the party and find his wife and the rest of his family, so despite two sets of hands clearing off the charcoal, his feathers were still streaked with it when he and K'arik left the changing room.
Conversation curled around the longhouse like a spring breeze, all laughter and warm smiles, or almost all. Tones of sorrow and wistful nostalgia accompanied every happy recollection of the life they all were here to celebrate. He'esh, the old orc that had been so well liked for his humor and his tall hunting tales. The stage was free for anyone to come up and tell a story of He'esh, as exaggerated as they pleased, to the cries and laughter of the other partygoers.
Morianten weaved his way through the crowd, trying to stick to the wall as much as he could. He was stopped several times by people complimenting his dance.
"You're one of the best raven dancers we've had, Morianten." He heard from several orcs. All he could do was smile and say thank you in reply, more focused on finding his wife than stopping to chat just yet.
She made herself easy to find, standing near a wall with Sitla sitting by her feet. Evelyn was a gnome, much much shorter than most of the crowd, but her posture and muscular build always made her seem a little taller than she really was. Her smile gleamed in the dim light as she noticed Morianten making his way towards her. She closed the distance with Sitla following right behind.
"You danced wonderfully, as usual," she said, embracing her feathery husband and kissing the scar on the side of his mouth.
"Thanks Ev." Morianten rubbed his cheek feathers against her face, turning to gently nip at her cheek in his own approximation of a kiss with the beak-like tooth that jutted out from below his upper lip. "I think if I didn't enjoy it so much I'd be a little annoyed by now about how everyone always asks me to play bird roles in dances though." He and Evelyn laughed together and made their way to the food table.
"You are the only one here with wings, after all."
"Sure would be nice if some other people with wings just moved here wouldn't it?" Morianten grabbed a plate and piled it high with dried and roasted fish. "Then I might have complaining buddies to talk to about how hard it is to get paint out of feathers."
"You didn't have to agree to that, you know." Evelyn remarked with a smirk. "Someone else could have danced the goose at that harvest festival."
"But the goose dance is so fun! And the haufin dances are some of the only ones where I'm taller than everyone else," he fake pouted as he swallowed a whole roasted trout. Dancing always made him so hungry.
"Oh you poor small thing," Evelyn jabbed him with her elbow and put a few small desserts on her plate.
"I recall a trip He'esh once made-" someone stated from the stage, "up north to a cousin clan of ours. He was caught in the midst of three moose fighting each other!" The speaker was another relative of K'arik that Morianten recognized but didn't know the name of. As the orc spoke, Kr'resh hopped up beside him and joined in the telling of the story.
"And just then as he was wrestling the three moose with his bare hands and winning, a wolf pack came out of nowhere!" Morianten laughed as they both described a bizarre scenario of moose, wolves, and one old orc who could kill a moose with a single punch and tame a wolf pack with a stern word. They told the story in speech and sign, as was custom. Their hand motions emphasized their words, building on the ever more elaborate imagery.
"He'esh the generous donated the meat and hides to our cousin clan, and dismissed his new wolf pack, of course."
"And our cousin clan in turn gave him back just one of the moose hides! Or he wouldn't have had any evidence to prove his great skill." The crowd was all full with laughter, some called out corrections to the story that no it was five moose and two wolf packs, or there was a puma involved, or some other over the top detail.
"When I die, I want a funeral like an orc," morianten said, "just toss my corpse in the middle of the woods and have a party where everyone can laugh about me." Evelyn shook her head with a grin.
"You married a gnome and your family is almost entirely elves," she replied, "you'll be buried under a tree like an elf, with a shroud of protective symbols like a gnome. And then I will stay up all night crying and eating gross food, and we will hold a party in the morning and then everyone can laugh about you." Morianten chuckled.
"Well so long as I get laughed about, that's what really matters." He and Evelyn stood back listening to a few more hilarious anecdotes and eating what they had on their plates.
"A pity Kaen and Raisha were out of town this week," Evelyn said, "I mean I like having the house to ourselves, but I know Kaen probably would have had a story to tell."
"Yeah probably. Speaking of my sister, have you seen the rest of the family? I haven't spotted them yet."
"They're around somewhere." Evelyn tried to look around but the crowd was quite dense. "Probably all scattered around the room."
"Hm." Morianten gulped down one last bite of fish and handed his empty plate over to Evelyn. "Well, I want to find K'arik again and talk to him. I didn't get much of a chance earlier. And then I want to go home because I'm starting to feel that dance and a belly full of fish teaming up to knock me out."
"It is getting very late," Evelyn remarked, "go on then, I can at least try to locate Ayana and let her know we're headed home."
"Thanks." Morianten gave her a quick peck on the cheek and walked off to find his friend.
K'arik was standing alone in one of the smaller side entrances of the longhouse. Even from behind, Morianten was easily able to recognize him. He liked to wear a beaded leather strip woven into his braid, a small gift from the dwarf clan his family had been friends with for generations. K'arik's shoulders seemed to be slouching a little as he stared out into the evening sky, ignoring the party behind him.
Morianten gently tapped K'arik twice on the elbow, waving at him when he turned to see.
"Are you alright?" Morianten signed. K'arik made an attempt to smile but faltered and glanced away. Morianten could see a few other people outside, taking similar breaks from the boisterous party. K'arik turned back to make eye contact again.
"I will be okay. But I miss him."
"Your grandfather was a great man." Morianten hesitated, hands paused in the air as he tried to think of anything else he could say. "You take after him a lot. Your kindness and ambition."
"Thank you." K'arik could smile a little easier now, but he still hung close to the doorframe, tense and shrinking into himself.
"I will leave you be, if you want time alone."
"Stay." Morianten only nodded in reply and took K'arik's hand when it was offered. They stood in the doorway together for a few moments, staring at the stars and the moons beyond the glimmering stripe of the ring around their world.
K'arik knelt suddenly, opening his arms. Morianten responded immediately with a hug, reaching up to wrap his arms around his friend's neck and his wings around his torso, embracing him as tightly as he could. Stories and laughter could never entirely prevent sorrow, but that wasn't the point. Sorrow and laughter went hand in hand at a funeral, especially tonight.
Morianten wasn't sure how long they stayed there holding each other, but eventually K'arik released him and stood up again.
"Thank you, Mori. I didn't mean to keep you from Evelyn. But I did need that."
"This was more important than going home quickly." Morianten glanced around and spotted Evelyn waiting quietly not so far away. "I am ready for some sleep though," he said with a grin, "I will see you tomorrow, my friend."
"Yes. Safe travels, and goodnight." K'arik patted his shoulder briefly and then waved at Evelyn. Morianten touched K'arik's arm one last time before he turned away and went back to his wife.
"Is he alright then?" She asked.
"Yeah, he just needed a good hug."
"You do give the best hugs."
"This is true," Morianten said with a laugh. "Let's go home, I'm exhausted." Evelyn nodded and they held hands as they walked out into the cold night.
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diteach · 3 years
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2020 in review
I was tagged by @apeironaxiomaton to look back at 2020 and pretty much to try and not hate it so much! Thank you!!
Also I’m stealing the idea of putting everything under a cut, which I have never done in my life (and probably should start doing) bc it makes things neat as heck. Almost none of these are in a particular order.
Top 5 movies I saw this year:
Volevo Nascondermi by Giorgio Diritti - this movie is REALLY good AND I have good memories tied to the protagonist for Reasons I’m gonna cry bye (a shame that I’ve only watched this other excellent movie starring Elio Germano tonight bc it should be on this list)
Emma (2020)
The King’s Speech
Spirited Away or Porco Rosso - I had watched the first before and never the second so I think the fairer choice would be Porco Rosso but I’m not entirely convinced of it
The Wolf of Wall Street - look, I simply have a weak spot for stories that are so absurd they can be nothing but real (see “the other Elio Germano movie”)
Top 5 TV shows I watched this year:
Murdoch Mysteries - it will stay engraved in the first place of EVERY chart in saecula saeculorum and NO nothing can take its place I don’t care
Peaky Blinders
Alias Grace - which I was sure was a movie? I was so shocked to discover it isn’t like was it really six hours long what the
The Queen’s Gambit
Suburra: Blood on Rome - “The series was developed by Daniele Cesarano and Barbara Petronio for Netflix, making it its first Italian-language original television series.” I’ll be honest, some bits were a little bit hmm-inducing. Not the best tv series I’ve ever seen, but it managed to be fun and easy to watch. Suspenseful even!
Top 5 Songs:
So there’s a reason why Spotify said I’m an octogenarian this year and for as much as I complain about it... it’s right... Spotify’s right. And it will only get worse, I’m afraid. All the songs are from the same playlist which was my most listened to (and is the most interesting to share imo). I swear I have listened to other, newer things as well.
Shake That Thing by The Abe Lyman’s California Orchestra
Night Hawk Blues by The Coon-Sander’s Nighthawk Original Orchestra
Where the Sweet Forget-Me-Nots Remember by Merle Johnston and His Ceco Couriers (I’ve loved these flowers since I was a kid it was so nice to find a song with them in the title!!)
Dew Dew Dewey Day by Nat Shilkret
The Panic is On by Mezz Mezzrow And His Swing Band
Top 5 Books I Read This Year:
so this is embarrassing,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,I “bought” an insane amount of books and read a grand total of...like...t w o. It was actually like four and some short stories (which I hated and are therefore banished from the good boy list) so I’m gonna list my silly little titles and make my silly little comments about them all. From “””””best””””” to “worst” we have:
The Adventures of a Modest Man by Robert W. Chambers - I literally cannot shut up about this book and, yes, it is the one tied to this illustration, about which I equally cannot shut up about. It’s so horrible that it makes a 360 and comes back as good, but not before hitting you with a cardboard tube for a laugh and subsequently stabbing you in the kidneys just because it can. I think we can confidently state that we are in the “I didn’t say it was good, I said I liked it” realm. I have so many questions about this book. Why was it written? Was it taking itself seriously? Was it commissioned by someone? Why is it so gay but only if you know that the author is a man? Maybe it’s a parody? Was it an experiment made by the author to test his own skill? I know jack about literature, unfortunately, so grain of salt here but it made me feel strong feels. Not that I could identify any of them if you asked, but they’re definitely there.
Old Possum’s Book of Practical Cats by T.S. Eliot - I’m counting this in bc what is a book if not a patchwork of silly little paragraphs anyway so yes, we have a collection of poems. Not only do I know jack about literature; as a matter of fact, I know jack about poetry as well! All I’m gonna say is: I like cute things, I like cats, the poems were cute AND about cats. I really liked it! I often find myself going back and reading again specific parts just for the delight it is to read them out loud! I also may or may not have named the cats you can adopt in Stardew Valley after some of Eliot’s cats. The movie Cats (2019) did one good thing: making me read this.
How You Can Keep Fit by Rudolph Valentino - Yes, that is correct. A book on fitness written (in English!) by silent movie superstar Rodolfo Valentino. It is less than 100 pages on real, actual exercises that the reader can replicate in the comfort of their own house with little to no equipment. With a sprinkle of old timey manly manner of speaking, a few anecdotes from the author’s childhood in ye merry Italian countryside, a dusting of precious advice against ice-cream, and a dash of genuine intrigue for these newly discovered “vitamins” everyone is talking about. Overall a fascinating read that I treasure dearly! Valentino also wrote a book of poems, which I am absolutely thrilled to read this year.
For Whom the Bell Tolls by Ernest Hemingway - Hmm.. I have mixed feelings about this one. Whenever the original language of a book is English, I instinctively want to read it in that language. Because I can! And because that way I get to read exactly what the author wrote. If it was another language, I’d get a translation, make peace with the fact that selling my soul to acquire perfect knowledge of all things is morally questionable, and call it a day. Problem: I’m a sucker for old books. And old books I did find indeed. There were three books by Hemingway for sale, very pretty, and for an almost symbolic price too so I bought them. They are Italian translations from the late 50s and my plan was to go through one in Italian, one in English, and after that, decide in which language to read the last one. I believe it was a mistake for me to start with Italian in Hemingway’s case. He’s known for having a very, VERY peculiar style that is integral to how the novels are perceived and I feel like I've robbed myself of literal peace of mind. For as much as I found the story interesting, I could not ignore the voice in the back of my head that kept wondering “was it necessary to render it like this?”. It did make me feel feels and think thoughts, but honestly? It was partially for the wrong reasons imo. It’s one of those books you should read at least once in your life, I guess, so I’m definitely glad I did it! Surprisingly, it captured me more than I expected and trapped me into its little world. I could clearly imagine the scenes in my head, which hadn’t happened in years! I’m really excited to move on to the next two books and finally be able to say if I appreciate his style or not.
Top 5 positive things that happened to me in 2020:
Visited Rome and took a stroll around on my own (sort of) for the first time in my life. I had never seen it at night :) Right after that I celebrated my birthday and got some cute gifts, including sweets that were sent all the way from Australia!!
Managed to buy my mom a gift, which is possibly the only real Accomplishment of 2020.
Took a bizarre trip this summer (I know, guilty) and fell in love with Slovenia
Discovering I like textile arts kinda gave me hope for myself and for the future. I say kinda for I dare not think concretely of anything too positive lest it should be prematurely taken from me. I shan’t elaborate. It is what it is.
Therapy!!!
The last few months of 2020 really hit me hard whereas in the beginning nothing was too bad so it was nice to see the list growing and growing! So many tiny good things happened and it’s worth to cling onto them. I’m tagging @sonicysuchillydog, @nurmilintunen, @alfonzone and anyone else who’d like to participate!! “Tell them I sent you” lol. Guys.............if you don’t feel like going thru your 2020 feel free to ignore bc......I get it............................
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Rapunzel and the Lost Lagoon
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As soon as I heard about this book, I put it on my birthday wishlist. But alas, my birthday had come and gone. No Lost Lagoon. Apparently my mom didn’t see it on the wishlist, so that’s why. Flash forward to Christmas Day and I held the book in my hands, which were trembling with excitement. Not really, but you get the idea. I had been waiting to devour this book for months on end and I did. So without further ado, I will present to you this handy-dandy post that encapsulates my thoughts on Lost Lagoon before, during, and after reading. I thought it would be fun to record my expectations and compare them to what I discovered. If you’ve read Lost Lagoon, what did you think? I’d love to hear your thoughts! ❤️
Before Reading
honestly, I’m not quite sure what to expect. All I know is that there’s a lot of moments between Raps and Cass and I am ready for them!
maybe it explains how Cass came to be Raps’ lady-in-waiting? (I hope so because I���ve always wondered this...)
I think I’ll like the book as a whole (I’m hoping I’ll love it)
I’m guessing that it is cute, funny, serious, and adventurous all in one
maybe we’ll learn more about Cass?
will Raps tell Cass about her life in the tower?
what will be the ratio of lighthearted to serious moments? Am I more likely to laugh or cry? Probably both 😅😂😂
this book’s design is absolutely gorgeous! 😍😍😍 I literally just stared at it for a while beginning to read it
During Reading
Rapunzel’s hair hasn’t grown back yet? Oh, it’s her first week in Corona. Okay...
“Something was missing. I was hoping painting would help me find whatever that was, or at least help me end the afternoon on a happy note.” (is this relatable or what? I know not to chase after the elusive beast referred to as happiness, but I do often strive to end the day on a good note because I feel like Satan wins if I don’t)
Friedborg is Arianna’s lady-in-waiting? That makes more sense now. I always feel bad not knowing much about her or her background. I hope she makes some appearances in the book (no sooner did I type this than I look down and skim the scene where she teaches Raps how to sit. Crazy, right?)
Eugene referring to Rapunzel as “my girl” (so sweet 🥰)
“Eugene’s warm brown eyes and mischievous smile are irresistible from any angle” (she’s head over heels, ya’ll 😂💕😂)
first look at Cass 🥰 That’s my girl! Not only does she want to be part of the guard, but she wants to succeed her father as Captain! Go after your dreams, girl! I support you ❤️
“I’d rather shovel sheep dung than mend clothes and gossip.” Mood 😂😂
she recently discovered a hidden spot by using maps of an ancient underground tunnel system? How cool!
okay, but Cass’ animosity towards Raps is fair. And the fact that she refers to her as “that girl”? Priceless
names of nearby nations? Like, yes please!
the irony of Cass piquing Raps’ interest in her by leaving as soon as she can after throwing the shot put 😅😂😂
Cass worrying she got herself in trouble by practicing shot put. Poor thing!
the angst Cass feels towards her dad because he wants her to be a lady-in-waiting when she clearly doesn’t... so relatable (it’s tough when a parent’s expectations and our own dreams/desires don’t match)
I didn’t realize Cass created the maps herself! She’s so determined to prove herself to her dad, it hurts 😭😭
I wonder if the pools in Yultadore are what make up the lost lagoon...
“Her enthusiasm was so shiny and bright I had to squint” (I totally understand this)
pretty boy Eugene and his quips 😂😂
Cass trying to keep her distance from Raps by calling her “Princess” and firmly saying “Goodbye” before shutting and locking the door behind her
So that’s how Cass and Eugene met... okay, cool. Nothing too crazy or weird. I don’t know what I expected but it’s nice to know how their battle of wits began
I’m noticing a pattern in the words used to describe Cass: knowledgeable, brave, etc. I think that’s cool because I feel like her pessimism gets a lot more attention in the series. It’s nice to acknowledge her other qualities as well.
Arianna chose Cass to be Raps’ lady-in-waiting. I always wondered how she got the position. I’m loving how many little things this book is explaining 🥰
Also, just noticed the bird illustrations on the page of every new chapter. I wonder if there’s a pattern...
OWL!!! 😍😍 he literally “senses her distress”. I wish we got to hear about how they met
I wanted to cry for Cass. Poor thing just wants to follow her dreams. I like the way the finality of the decision was described. It’s so tragic 💔
“When Cassandra saw him [Eugene], her face clouded over like a stormy afternoon” 😂😂 I love how Cass doesn’t try to hide her feelings about people. It’s true that she keeps personal things close to her chest, but not when it comes to what she thinks of others. Honesty is the best policy, right?
I love how Cass continuously prompts Raps to keep reading the poem. She’s like, “Yeah, yeah, just get to the good stuff” 😂
about that poem... maybe it’s from Herz Der Sonne’s perspective. Could the “truth sealed in precious stones” be a reference to Zhan Tiri’s disciples and how they were trapped within stones? And what about the three gems? What’s the emerald tapestry supposed to be? Does it reference Saporia? I HAVE TOO MANY UNANSWERED QUESTIONS
“A few times I thought I heard some rustling behind me, but I kept going” (me: yeah, Raps is definitely following her) 😂
me when I realize the “emerald tapestry” is grass: 🙃
why is Cass so fearful around water? Did someone try to drown her? someone please tell me who is responsible so I can PUNCH THEM IN THE FACE 😅🤣
painfully ironic how Rapunzel can swim despite being locked in a tower all her life and Cass can’t
Raps nonchalantly offering to teach Cass how to swim just warms my heart 🥰❤️
okay, so Cass is responsible for her fear of water. That’s almost worse because it invites shame and self-hatred, which makes it more difficult to push against that fear or overcome it 😔
the importance of Raps agreeing to help Cass even after realizing she doesn’t want to be her lady-in-waiting is HUGE. This is something I feel like should have happened throughout Season 1 but never did (Raps supporting Cass and trusting that she has a good reason for things even if she doesn’t understand)
“But now I have to teach you which fork to eat your waffles with and stuff” 😂
the first time they call each other Cass and Raps 🥰😍🥰😍
woah, I didn’t expect there to be a time jump. I should have known because I kept wondering why they would depict Rapunzel with her blonde hair on the cover if this takes place before it comes back. Anyways...
I forgot to take notes as I read the majority of part 2. I’m currently a chapter or two away from part 3 and all I have to say is that something bad is about to happen. I can feel it. Dahlia’s definitely shady and so is Marco. I suspected Marie earlier but now I’m not sure. She wasn’t obvious until she was but now she’s not again so maybe she is guilty after all? Either way, Raps is making dumb decisions and I’m over here yelling at her to get her life together before she gets killed or kidnapped (whichever comes first, I guess) 😅🙃
Cass is absolutely roasting Rapunzel and I am here for it! Don’t mind me just munching away on my popcorn over here 🍿
Cass said she’s finally gonna leave Corona so I bet Raps will fess up and tell her that Dahlia’s been helping her with the painting for Cass so Cass will let her guard down and think Dahlia’s okay after all. But... she won’t be and they’re gonna realize she was the bad guy after all 😎
didn’t think Cass would get attacked 😅 also, the fact that she is highly skilled and powerful yet trips and twists her ankle is such a mood. Like, that’s literally me in a nutshell. She is beauty, she is grace, and she falls flat on her face 🤣🤣 while I’m here, I’m guessing Marco is her attacker because he probably has a rough voice
Okay, so I guess Dahlia really is innocent then... idk, I still think she could be up to something
I WAS RIGHT!
Marco’s the bad guy and things just escalated quickly cause now he’s got a knife against Cass’ throat 😳😬😵
so Dahlia’s innocent after all... I thought she or Marie might be working with Marco but I guess not (kinda disappointed to be honest)
okay so this Dahlia chick is exasperatingly hilarious 😂😂 she legit took part of Raps’ bookcase to use for an art piece. Like, who does that?
“Pascal shook his head, totally fed up” me too bud, me too 🤣
After Reading
so I did get to see how Cass and Raps first met (also how she first met Eugene as well)
I like how they combined their talents and passions at the end to create the map painting
There were a bunch of lines that made me laugh, although there were just as many that hit me like a knife to the chest (pretty much anything angsty from Cass’ POV) so I like how it made me feel all the feels (I felt like an investigator trying to figure out who the bad guy was and that was a blast 😆)
overall it was pretty good. I did feel like the characters were off (Arianna seemed like she swapped personalities with Frederick at times and Eugene apologized for joking Cass- as if!), but other than that I enjoyed it. There were a bunch of new characters being introduced so it was somewhat hard to tell who was bad and who wasn’t but I guessed correctly in the end. I was hoping there would be more than one bad guy but oh well.
I’m glad I read it because now I know a few extra things about Corona and its surrounding countries (plus I can finally read through all the Lost Lagoon related tumblr posts I saved for later... I was waiting until I read the book and here I am!)
If anyone needs me, I’ll be going through LL tumblr posts. I should definitely be sleeping but that’s not important 😅😂😂
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senzanomeor · 4 years
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It’s Okay Not to Be Okay; Spoilers (Ep. 16)
Waaah, I’ve finally watched the last two episodes of “It’s Okay Not to Be Okay” and I’m shedding tears like a beautiful maiden seeing her lover off to war. I absolutely love the ending, it felt perfect in every possible way. Moon-Young publishing the last book. Kang-tae going on a road trip. Sang-tae becoming an illustrator. 
That last scene, though. That scene straight up killed me. Sang-tae leaving the nest. Hugging Kang-tae. Thanking Kang-tae. I cannot, for the life of me. I cannot. Kang-tae crying. Just. The whole moment. 
I even warmed up to Joo-ri by the end, and Mr. Lee too. I genuinely hope they find happiness together. I squealed when he touched her hand in that scene in front of the hospital, on the steps. Her smile at his nervousness was everything. So cute! I have to admit though, I’m kind of glad “Witch of the West” manuscript was saved and I’m feeling guilty about it, yes. I’m sooo curious about it, I legitimately want to read that book, I wish it existed. 
Anyhoo, an amazing drama, 10/10 would delete my memory so I could watch it again. The whole story. The character development. I am a big fan of character development. It is my jam. The characters. I didn’t think I would fall in love with Sang-tae this much, but here I am. He is the cutest, the bestest, the kindest ever and I love him. Moon-Young and Kang-tae too. Just. Everyone.
Okay, I’m embarrassing myself now, so that’s that, and yeah. Until next obsession, anyway.
(I do hope they had many sons later. Sang-tae would be a cool uncle.)
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