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#Also huge giant bonus points
fiendishfables · 2 months
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Camillo Carmine x Reader
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General Headcanons (SFW + NSFW)
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warnings: nsfw, mentions of blood, mentions of biting, cursing
words: 1.4k+
a/n: this was a highly requested work, so enjoy and have fun with the little bonus at the end! This is not really an x reader, but it could be read as such, so oh well. Let me know your thoughts on Camillo's character, and/or if you'd like to see more of him in the near future <3
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SFW
✧˚ · . Camillo is basically like a big cat
✧˚ · . Tall motherfucker, standing at approximately 8,2
✧˚ · . The guy is very calm, silent, and sneaky all at once. If anything, he would make an excellent spy and has been offered positions before in that line of work
✧˚ · . Very independent; wont work for anybody but himself and is beyond stubborn
✧˚ · . He is a hardass, but underneath his tough, strong front, is an individual who is a giant kid at heart, who is so deeply loyal and giving that it hurts, and who takes all relationships he makes very seriously, as in he would gladly put his life on the line for someone he cares about; questioning his loyalty is the worst you can do
✧˚ · . Favorite colors consist of greys and purples of any shade; it always struck him as having more of an elegant, dancer sort of vibe, and the display of the colors usually help him to relax in times of distress. His whole bedroom is centered around that color palette and it hasn't been changed since he and Camilla have inherited the mansion
✧˚ · . On the subject of Camilla, he likes to annoy her. His real personality can start to be seen the more time he spends around his sister; they behave just like any normal pair of siblings would. The two have had a love hate relationship growing up and it still is that way, even if just a bit more watered down now. The two like to joke and hang around together every now and again when they aren't off busy with their own lives
✧˚ · . What a Carmine lacks in affection, they make up for in loyalty
✧˚ · . If you wanna talk about dancers, he is one. He loves dancing in his spare time and even uses the Carmine manor as a spot to host dancing lessons amongst sinners willing/wanting to learn
✧˚ · . His silvery pointed dancing shoes are like his literal children, and he always goes into a slight panic whenever he can't find them. They provide him with that sense of security, as dancing is a huge part of his life and he could never stand to be without it; they were also a gift from his mother
✧˚ · . Never likes to ask anyone for anything, especially not help. He likes to cover up his needs with smart-ass comments and handsome smirks that most can't stay mad at for too long
✧˚ · . Has been told he has a very punchable face
✧˚ · . His fangs make for a great, sarcastic smile; his face either consists of a frown or that signature smirk. He uses his fangs for a lot of things, including biting people when they get on his nerves
✧˚ · . Can totally play the piano; claims its a very calming and dignified instrument. He doesn't play it often but when he does, its a gift to anyone around to hear
✧˚ · . On the asexuality spectrum, identifying as demisexual and biromantic. It takes him a little longer than the average sinner to develop feelings for someone, let alone sexual feelings
✧˚ · . As stated before, his relationships are one of the most important things in his life and he handles them with great seriousness
✧˚ · . The epitome of that one secretive, mysterious, tall and mysterious stranger everyone wants to be friends with, but are too afraid to approach directly to ask
NSFW
✧˚ · . It's very difficult to get anything verbal out of this man when he's in the process of being intimate with someone, even if they're his s/o
✧˚ · . The most you can expect is some pleasured grunts, maybe some low groans if you're lucky
✧˚ · . It's not that he isn't enjoying whatever is being brought upon him, he is just one to closely guard his feelings and never really express them too vividly; yes that ends up following him into his sex life
✧˚ · . 9 times out of 10 he prefers to give pleasure rather than receive it
✧˚ · . Loves to degrade and use pet names with his partner; sweetheart, doll, slut, and whore tending to be some of his personal favorites to use
✧˚ · . Big on consent. If you are ever not comfortable with anything he proposes or is in the middle of doing to you, then he will stop instantly and get you anything you need. He may seem like an asshat sometimes, but he is a decent person (if that comes as such a shock)
✧˚ · . Into some form of pet play/leashes, no negotiation
✧˚ · . He always likes to be in control and rarely ever is the submissive one during intimacy.
✧˚ · . Will speak Spanish in bed, usually doing so in order to fluster his partner; it often gets him a positive response
✧˚ · . Being blindfolded is a big kink of his. As a dancer, he is used to having to be accustomed to other senses, so when they are heightened after his sight is temporarily taken from him, he will have a ball of a time
✧˚ · . One of his top favorite things is watching his partner ride him. Just the sight of his cock being sheathed inside your body over and over again as he watches you get off on his lap all on your own
✧˚ · . Dirty dancing is something he is much too fond of. The act of getting all worked up from dancing with one another, teasing each other all the while, then getting to fuck his partner into the ground, whispering praises to them about how well they danced with/for him; he is all too eager to teach you more of what he knows about the dancing world
✧˚ · . The little shit is one of the biggest teases you will ever meet. He honestly has a sex drive that's more so on the lower side and does not need sex as often as most sinners seem to
✧˚ · . But, be prepared when he does have the energy to pleasure you, for he is astounding at it.
✧˚ · . Kissing, biting, steamy makeout sessions, eating you out, fucking you raw; he can do it all and excel in the process
✧˚ · . His fangs usually come into play a lot during sex; a huge fan of biting and leaving marks on his partner to let others know that they have already been claimed
✧˚ · . Camillo is one of those demons you'd be lucky to have sex with. It's not even an egotistical thing, he's just not very sex-coded when it comes to relationships or really anything in general. He believes in a true connection with someone first before engaging in any sorts of those activities, hence his sexuality
✧˚ · . Sex with Camillo is always very serious and passionate. He never allows himself to be as vulnerable as he would be right now, so better to cherish it whilst it lasts
✧˚ · . It's almost like he picks one mate for life, then he's done looking, like some species do
✧˚ · . Thinking of it, when he really gets into action and the rare times he wants to have sex, he fucks like a wild animal. He does have his vanilla, gentle side where he will care for you nothing short of a husband, but if he has the chance or some pent up anger to release, you better prepare to go for multiple rounds of very rough sex
✧˚ · . To top things off, he does have a praise kink. It may be hard to pick up on at first, but if you praise him, let him know how good he's making you feel, he's a mess (at least internally). Nothing really gets him going more than knowing he is fulfilling his job as a partner; making you feel good in every aspect that he can. It gives him purpose and that's really all he needs when he's with his s/o
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BONUS~
✧˚ · . One of Camillo's wildest fantasies is to have his lover cockwarming him whilst he plays a song for them on his piano. He can imagine struggling to not fumble over the keys, not let his fingers slip, as he feels you clench around him, biting his lip or your shoulder hard enough to draw blood in order to stifle any noises that may find their way past his lips. That vulnerability is something he knowingly holds sacred; you could potentially be the one to coax it out of him.
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seat-safety-switch · 2 years
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When you're a Pope, nobody is going to say no to you. You can walk right into any car dealership, point to your goofy huge hat, and drive off in anything fresh and new that catches your eye. Unfortunately, I'm not (currently) a Pope. There are a lot of reasons for this, ranging from the spiritual (not Catholic) to the physical (horrific neck injury in high school causing lack of giant hat-wearing ability.) So I have to buy my new cars just like anyone else does: by waiting 45 to 50 years after their release and then pulling them out of a frozen-over swamp.
Now, depending on what part of the world you're from, you may be wondering why I specified a frozen swamp. Doesn't snow and cold make it much harder to do everything, and cause an unbroken line of scarring pain and profanity to emerge the first time you bonk your flimsy flesh hand on a piece of cold, unyielding metal in the vicinity? Yes, but it also means that I don't have to put on my swim trunks, the image of which many popular mens' fashion magazines have defined as "unsettling." As a side bonus, whatever used to live inside the car is probably dead by now, or at least Encino Man'd out the yin-yang. Most likely, we'll find out for sure about that last one in mid-April when everything in the trunk thaws out.
There's another problem, of course. These cars aren't always "free." If you are not particularly attuned to the unique nature of shitbox-gathering, you might be surprised at this fact. Aren't I helping these poor farmers dispose of a decrepit automobile? Won't they be grateful for my hard effort? Unlikely: you don't become a tax-break-gathering petit-bourgeois hobby farmer without being aware of the value of a buck, and you don't obtain a harem of fine Detroit pseudosteel unless you're willing to be a hard negotiator at the auctions in the first place. This, like the Pope thing, is a fact of life. Which is also why you have to do the extraction in the dark, and hope that they don't have night-vision goggles.
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barblaz-arts · 3 months
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Hey! Since you mentioned "Soul Eater" before, can I ask what you think about it? From the anime, from the manga (if you read it), the powers, the story in general, the ships, the chops, the humor, etc.
The anime was stunning! I love that it managed to translate the gothic but campy vibe the manga had. The soundtrack was insane too. I used to be so obsessed with Paper Moon and the second ED. Even the character OSTs like Kidd's theme and BlackStar's theme were really good, even if the lyrics didn't make a lot of sense.
The character designs and powers/fighting style for each character was soooo cool btw. The aesthetic for this whole show was just so good. Like. If Tim Burton and Doctor Seuss went and collaborated on an anime idk what I'm saying.
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And the animation for the fight scenes were just mesmerizing. Bones(the animation studio) are just real damn good at what they do.
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Seeing Maka fight with that giant scythe changed my life. At the time shounen rather than shoujo/slice of life anime were my thing. It was my first time seeing a female main protag for a shounen anime, that was probably one of the reasons I was as obsessed with the show as I was. I saw myself in maka for many reasons, i loved her a lot.
I had my gripes with the anime. Like. The ending was a lil weird with how they defeated Asura, but I did love that it had Maka also be a weapon. Also the fact that Crona was alive and well by the end is a nice bonus.
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I vividly remember being obsessed with this scene in particular. I had such a huge crush on them lmao
Also not to like out my cringey 12 yo self, but I used to ship Crona/Kidd. Looking back it's so funny.
Soul/Maka is still one of my favorites anime ships ever tho. Ships that start off being besties that gradually turn romantic are just always gonna be my favorite i guess
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Also just... Soul's dedication to always keep Maka safe was so dang sweet??? He'd catch a sword on the chest for her. He'd break her fall for her. He'd really do anything for her. Like damn...
As for the manga, yes I did read it! I think it ended when I was in high school? I followed the manga as it updated along with other mangas like Pandora Hearts and Reborn etc. Soul Eater was the only shounen I finished reading (Unless PH counts as shounen. I don't think it does...).
The direction it went with was so painful. Crona leaving Maka and going back to Medusa was my NaruSaku fallout istg. It sucks that things didn't end happily for Crona in the manga, but I still enjoyed the journey it put me through. As dark as it was, the chapter where Crona finally kills Medusa was kinda cathartic.
And although the manga didn't have weapon!Maka, i like the upgrade when she honed the abilities of her grigori soul. Maka riding scythe!Soul like Cardcaptor Sakura with her magic staff was so cool. And the way she had Soul's blade turn into piano keys and turned the black blood into a dress was kinda badass. I wish we get to see these in reboot FMA brotherhood style someday
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The humor was great. My brothers and I still quote/reference a lot of the funny stuff from it. I just wish it wasn't one of those animes that can get so pervy to the point it's uncomfortable....
Anyways, loved it a lot. Sorry I probably could have talked about Kidd and BlackStar too and I love them, but this reply would be a lot longer than i have the energy to do lol. They're popular anyways. This show had one of the best female anime characters in Maka and it will probably always have a special place in my heart.
And the chops? Great as always
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ctitan98official · 4 months
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Anonymous: How dare you break my heart like that with the latest Alcina fic. I demand (but in a polite way. Like a really polite way) that you make a fluffy one with maid!reader who's quite strong and Alcina has a big ass crush on them so the girls would constantly ask for help lifting the most random stuff whenever Alcina is around so she would gay panic (uno reverse card tall vampire lady!) and it doesn't help that reader is also a big flirt but only with her. Bonus points if the reader is also quite tall and is actually strong enough to lift Alcina. I saw a post with Alcina being a blushing mess and now I want more so there's that. Thank you!
I must confess that I have no idea what fic is being referenced at the beginning of this ask lol. But, this is a really great prompt! Reader, as usual, is gender neutral. Let’s get into it!
You had been working at the castle for a few days. It’s kind of an intense environment. There is always work to be done, but you have definitely been given a lot of the tasks that involve heavy lifting… Okay, damn near every task that requires a lot of physical labor. You don’t mind. It feels nice to have something you’re good at.
You have always been a bit of a misfit in the village. You’re incredibly tall compared to pretty much everyone. You also have a very muscular form from working various jobs such as carpentry and farming. You can come off as very… Intimidating, shall we say? However, you’re really just secretly longing for company.
One morning, you have your first encounter with Lady Dimitrescu’s daughters: Bela, Cassandra, and Daniela. They are… Interesting.
“Holy crap, Hercules! Anyone ever teach you to fight with these massive paws?!” Cassandra says as she compares how large your hand is in relation to her own.
You instantly blanch at the comment which makes Daniela coo at how shy you are. “Oh, It’s okay, tough stuff.” She says, patting your shoulder. “Cassie is just being mean!” She says and sticks her tongue out at her sister. “I bet you’re a gentle giant!” She gushes.
Your cheeks are now flaming red. “I… I, um-” You stammer.
“Cool it, you two!” Bela admonishes her sisters before turning to you apologetically. “I am so sorry about my crazy sisters.” She says and gestures at the brunette and redhead. “I’m Bela. What’s your name?” She asks warmly.
You smile at her, thankful to not be gawked at. “I’m Y/N.” You say.
“Oh, now I get it. I heard Mother talking about you! She never remembers any of the castle staff.” Dani says. “I heard her ask one of the maids to tell her more about a certain ‘Huge and strong servant’. You’re definitely her type.” Dani giggles wildly.
Your stance becomes rigid and you clench your teeth in discomfort. Lady Dimitrescu… You’d seen her around the castle and… She’s definitely your type. But, you’d never let yourself become emotionally invested. She’s your boss and off-limits. It doesn’t matter if you think she’s gorgeous because she’d never give you the time of day. Alright? Feelings appropriately squashed? Great. Let’s continue.
Suddenly, a very devilish look overcomes Bela… The sister who you thought was the most well-adjusted. She eagerly pulls Dani and Cass away from you and the three huddle in a nearby corner to talk.
You assume that you have been dismissed so you return to your daily tasks. What a crazy trio.
Over the next couple of days, you start getting bizarre requests from the sisters.
“Y/N, can you pick up this couch and move it to the other side of the room?” Cassandra orders one day.
You raise an eyebrow, but quickly nod your head. “Of course.” You say. You easily grab the couch around its middle and carry it all the way across the room. When you’re finished, you look up to see… Lady Dimitrescu… Right in front of you… Face-to-face. When did she get here?
Alcina did not expect to get so turned on by someone she barely knows. This is torture. Her usually calm but commanding presence is failing her.
Your thoughts are all over the place, but you take in the sight of Alcina’s red cheeks. She looks completely flushed. She must be hot! Do something, Y/N!
“My Lady, may I go grab you a glass of cold water? You look a bit peaked.” You say, hoping you haven’t offended her.
Alcina’s face only becomes hotter as she hears your voice. To be honest, she’s been fervently imagining what it sounds like. But your real voice is even better than in her dreams. Alcina finally snaps out of her gay panic as you look at her before clearing her throat. “I… Um, I just need… Some air, that’s all.” She squeaks out and leaves as fast as possible.
Before you can ask Cassandra what that was all about, she swarms away. Of course. You hope you didn’t just fuck things up.
Later on, Alcina and Bela are playing chess and you are assigned to bring them tea. Everything seems to be going fine right now. Alcina looks better than she did earlier. However, at one point in the game, Bela “Accidentally” drops one of her pawns on the floor and it rolls underneath a giant grandfather clock not too far away.
Bela clucks her tongue before asking if you wouldn’t mind moving the clock to get the piece.
Alcina’s eyebrows shoot up at this. “Bela, that clock is easily hundreds of pounds-” She begins.
But, you easily lift the clock up and move it over. “Here it is, Lady Bela!” You say, happy to have found the little pawn. You hand it back to Bela, who can’t help the self-satisfied grin she’s wearing. She’s a genius.
Alcina is red hot. Again. Just how strong are you?! She tries to continue playing and focus on the game, but on the inside she is freaking out. Her mind eventually wanders to the idea of you easily scooping her up into your arms in a show of romantic passion. She’s certain you could hold her without breaking a sweat and that feels… Nice. Normal. She hasn’t been held in so long. It’s torment to have you to rile up these deep fantasies, but… She just knows you would take excellent care of her.
Alcina looks to you out of the corner of her eye, before politely excusing herself from the game with the lame reasoning of needing to get work done.
Bela smiles and nods at her mother. Mission accomplished. Just wait till her sisters find out about this!
You and Alcina are both completely smitten with each other… What could the future hold?
Masterlist
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thegoldenshi-shi · 2 months
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am I hallucinating or did Deathsaurus not have a wife named Esmereal?
if he did, Rest in Piece Cliffjumper You gotta somehow defeat or straight up lie to his equally terrifying and bigger final boss of a wife *cue the boss music*
(feel free to ignore this but I find it a little funny over the pain that Cliffjumper is going through of being called the wrong name and mistaken for the wrong person. also I am tired and vaguely remember a fanart of Esmereal asking Cliffjumper of what exactly happened to Deathsaurus)
He was, in fact married.
I love the idea of him being weirdly domestic and loving when not out doing evil Decepticon things. Especially when what little we see of Esmeral she was a polite, sweet looking, giant dragon lady. And a civilian apparently? Since she never appeared outside the Decepticon fortress, I'm guessing she didn't have any combat training.
Also, I know it was just the comic style, but her ridiculously girly face makes me laugh.
Now I can see Cliffjumper leaving the hospital after the events of Probat. While he's freaking out over how crazy his life's just gotten, he gets stopped by a huge lady who mistook him as a hospital worker and wants to know where her husband is.
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"Your husband??"
"Ambassador Deathsaurus. Do you know where his room is?"
Bonus points if he's afraid of her because she's so scary looking, but she's like the epitome of sweetness. Esmeral's just really upset and wants to go to her comatose husband.
Also, she doesn't know that the jumpy hospital worker is the one who sent her precious husband into a coma, or else she might have gone just as crazy as he did on Probat.
Thank you so much for your ask! I had forgotten about Esmeral and how much I enjoyed her concept.
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kenmaiii · 1 year
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MOOVEEE IM CURIOUS!! please do tell why you think each of the boys would flop in dating I'd love to hear an indepth! like as a huge levi fan I'm extremely patient with him as is because same hat with stuff he goes and struggles through but just know I have to put my foot down because he'll eventually be too much and won't accept we definitely got some unhealthy dynamic going on down the line
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YOU'VE COME TO THE RIGHT PLACE ANON. kind of a coin toss here tho cuz I think every character in any property should have flaws to some degree! Even if they are a 'perfect' character bcuz no one can actually be entirely 'perfect', but its like. a double edged sword with OM cuz thats either admitting that the writers kind of did their thing for once OR is it just that they completely fumbled in approaching these flaws properly
and reminder this is not me saying they wouldnt have ANY good dateable qualities at all, just pointing out why you'd look at one of them and think Hm. This Is Kinda. Not As Fun As I Wouldve Thought.
BUT YEA. WHY I THINK CHARACTERS WOULD FLOP AT DATING U
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LUCIFER: oh boy where do i start. I dont know about the rest of you but I fear that this old man is way TOO strict and domineering most of the time. (not always.................. of course. he has a silly side for sure but good lord...) 😒 like I am nawt trying to date a prison warden can you ease up off me a bit sir... I know the game has taken more care to editing his dialogue in a respectful way but my gawd does this guy demand things from you so much. Like VERY demanding in not tolerating certain things from you, literally it's his way or the highway and you have GOT to do it right too or else. he's like that with everyone sure but with the MC? dating? yeesh! I think if you are the type that doesn't like being told what to do or being talked over you'd get annoyed with him very quickly.
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Like the writers unfortunately nailed having someone be so prideful to such blazing smoldering degrees that it ended up overshadowing a lot of his good parts. Getting him to admit things/wrongdoings is so very hard. He's VERY emotionally constipated as hell on top of that. I know he can actually set aside the time to say things to you while being genuine. occasionally. rarely. but he's way more likely to mainly ONLY be open while DRUNK. and while i think its kind of cute as a trait somewhat, are YOU willing to wait for him to be extremely real mainly when he's too drunk to possibly remember every time.
Speaking of getting drunk though he's also like- ridiculously horny a lot which?F?DSf is a bonus if you like that but it can come across as him being overly pushy in many many cases. but once again i can acknowledge the writers/translators have been better at adding in clear consent to choices. 👍🏿 Another thing is that you'd have to deal with him always being busy and overworking himself. and constantly. And as someone that also has very questionable sleeping/eating/overworking habits you are going to have a very hard time getting through to him about this bcuz he puts way too much responsibility on himself AND he has a tendency to forget that he hasnt slept/eaten. It would be a very nasty combo if youre ALSO like that (even if he would scold you for doing the same and take care of you)
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Also he cares about them sure but he's most definitely always gonna be complaining about his brothers and Diavolo to you constantly. Are you ready to sit through that. More than usual that is.
Speaking of the brothers being a package deal they will most definitely interrupt any peace and quiet you and the eldest both rarely get, like the mood will just nawt be right im sorry.
Oh and if youre not a dog person I cannot imagine how you are even going to tackle time with him and a giant three-headed demon dog bcuz that would also have to be your baby by default. Walks must be absolutely something! Like I love dogs but really think about it. An actual life-sized Clifford. But a demon dog. I do not have the strength to deal with regularly sized dogs even
MAMMON: he was one of the slightly higher ones on that 'worst to date' poll (nowhere near Luci or Belphie ofc), but it was only people listing about money problems or going 'Ha. imagine sharing a bank account with that guy. it'd be drained so fast'. And yea sure I hear that. u-u All that guy really needs is someone to properly manage and limit his funds and advise him really (but I mentioned before that Mammon shouldnt just be limited to money or material valuable like the writers always do. His fatal flaw is his greed! and greed can encompass many things not just material (There's power, love, friendships, food etc).
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His flop when dating you, I would think is being too overprotective and possessive of your time. As much as I love him he DOES overstep quite a bit with the 'being your first'. Sometimes he simply does not consider YOUR feelings on situations and schemes first. Though that's a flaw of most of the people in the devildom have by law of the Main Character Curse™. You must be put into situations I get that -w- But like I said yea he really does have a really big problem with possessiveness and always wanting your time and attention. Which- could get tiring if you're not in the frame of mind to deal with clinginess or possessiveness! Because I totally get that it's a lot for some people.
Harking back to the money thing though I genuinely dont think it'd actually be a SUPER DUPER MAJOR problem with your relationship? He's shown to be quite considerate on that aspect when it really comes down to it. Like he HAS worked a couple extra shifts at a job in canon just to save up and buy gifts before. And he's literally a highly sought after model! And surprisingly good at math when he has the opportunity (though it def still has to relate to him positively $$$) so he could stack his dough pretty normally. He just needs someone to keep an eye on his funds + other sources to balance out his Greed more! 😅
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Somehow he manages to be both capable and completely hopeless also which is very impressive! You would have to help him out with a lot of things since he IS used to being spoiled, in a way. He does get treated very poorly by a lot of the characters BUT he clearly still has very lavish tastes and was both a very high-ranking angel AND demon so combined with greed he's used to the good stuff (thus me thinking he's fairly spoiled still- so he will expect a lot of you lowkey) Also I know I said he's well capable of finding his own source of income but he IS canonically bad at saving... and added with the thing above ^ well... If you've watched Abbott Elementary at all he WILL be the Tariq to your Janine, sorry!
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TBH.. I cant really think of any other flaws atm besides over-asserting himself to your time and attention
LEVI: grabbing you by the shoulders- THATS IT THATS EXACTLY WHY ANON!!!! his flopping is mainly coming from the fact that he always puts himself down so very much!!! his head is literally his biggest enemy! its natural for people to have insecurities or doubts about things. and that can be especially heightened in relationships; whether platonic or romantic! but oh mein gottness does that guy put himself down so much.
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I also struggle with the same things (believe it or not Levi was my wife for a good while like he used to make me teehee giggle like crazy so i get it i relate heavily). But at some point you ARE going to feel a bit drained or tired constantly hearing negative things about someone you care about and love! Supporting and providing reassurance or denying the negative stuff is a given, and can go on for as long as time would permit! But at some point you have got to start believing in yourself a little more and serve cuntress or something, Levi!
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If levi was able to work on believing himself more and being more confident (which he has shown himself to do in quite a few cases) I think it can flop a little less!
His gaming time might cut quite a bit into your romantic time as well, especially if youre not the type thats super into gaming. Also considering that this is definitely his first real relationship (compared to the others) and not an ingame one I feel like there would need to be a serious chat at some point over ideals and expectations that he's picked up in game. Or how things possibly work irl. I must be honest, while it is cute for him to get so excited or irl achievements and progress with you he does unintentionally compare that to his gaming experiences quite a bit (even out loud in front of you). Not babying him or shaming him but it's still nice to talk about the things you expect or want relationship-wise and I know he'd be out of his depth with that.
his only other flaw (to some, not me 🤔) might be his avid infodumping and explaining of shows/anime/games/manga IF you arent interested in hearing about that a lot. What else do you guys have in common that you can relate with I suppose? A very minor thing though as I think many of us like a little infodumping nerd as long as they arent being pretentious about it! ^_^
<- she is not going into detail on Rurichan since there's too much debating on if its weird or simply his special interest/comfort character. them artists (especially in the anime) really keep trying to set him up tho..
SATAN: oooh boy. I recognize that Satan's character (ignoring Nightbringer) is for the most part stuck in a limbo of constantly having ties to Luci and his insecurities around that. Not necessarily a flop since I do believe that he would confide in you about it a fair amount buttttt he definitely loses points for constantly bringing up Lucifer. -100 EXP
People are always making him out to be extremely angry at the drop of a pin, which yea does get angry about things, but also he? don't be getting angry all that often? especially when he gets his little annual pockets of character development? angry and annoyed occasionally sure but its not his ONLY trait. now if he's raging 24/7 and could barely have a convo with anyone that'd be red flag dating flop city! but since he is not we can slide him further down the least to being less of a dating flop with you. (we're ignoring the NB version of him btw)
Now an actual flaw I can actually point out is he's also quite selfish... but he can surprisingly own up to it most of the time. sorta. kinda. well-
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and to a degree he definitely seems to be lacking in awareness in certain social aspects. He's just a silly guy on the spectrum like most of his brothers tho: he gets a pass. Plus he's a socialite he's got a lot of fun connections, what does it matter that he can meow on command in the middle of this fancy dinner. Sure the other guests are looking at us weird and he's a little bit of a freak but he can meow-
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His biggest flaw is being funny actually. That pisses me off stop making me laugh ✋🏿🙄 and if you hate him making cat puns i suppaws that would get under your skin too
ASMO: Asmo's insecurities are gonna get the better of him every now n again also, so while he's not quite in the same self-deprecating league as Levi, he definitely needs a lot of reassurance and compliments to stay grounded. So if that's not something you can keep up with it could prove to be a lot considering he's so obsessed with himself. Just like Mammon he has a lot of possessive tendencies, but it comes out in interesting ways unlike Mammon's ig. He's covertly silly with it since he'd say it with a cute smile on his face. He's a little insane also. I think it's just cuz the version of Asmo I have in my head is drenched in blood I hope you understand. Something isn't right up there (affectionate) so you would also have to get used to the most insane things being said with a smile. Not a flaw to most people of course but to ppl that are normal... well... it would be a lot
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But Imagine youre dating him, you walk into his room and you see him quietly mumbling to himself in a ring of mirrors to cheer himself up. I'd be like hey um. Do we need to talk about this.
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And to finish it off he does have a quite a bit of selfish moments considering he loves to put himself first (common theme with the ppl in the devildom hm...) and a lot of times where he gets unreasonably angry! But to be fair I love selfish angry characters IF they fit the right boxes, so I cheer whenever he gets like that bcuz I love studying him 🔍. Dealing with it in real life tho well... hm. who's to say how one would handle that! He's still my little sweetie tho and he would eat up the romancing and wining & dining and know HOW you need to be loved, there's just the other things to deal with when it comes to dating him!
BEEL: he's on the LEAST likely to flop while dating you scale honestly cuz he's literally just a chill sweet guy when he's trying his best. I think his only problem would be in not understanding you sometimes. Im sure he listens but will he really GET everything. Bcuz there are a few moments in game where Beel seems to be a lot more internally insightful even if he's not as vocal about his thoughts. And he's clearly very considerate abt the people he cares about, but ultimately there's a lot he just wouldn't get unless you sit down and clearly explain it to him. Bcuz otherwise it could come off as him not caring or being indifferent since he's pretty nonchalant. Blunt at times but still, easy-going and fairly perceptive.
And he's very much also a guy that just charges into things, though it's kind of a give-or-take thing. He is equally the guy that worries and stresses about something in silence if it's serious enough or he does not dwell on something for too long at all- which! could possibly be something that annoys you as once again, it could come off as him seeming too nonchalant or unintentionally dismissive. Or well. the things he charges into might have to be something you talk him out of. You're gonna hear shit like this on the regular and he's gonna wonder why youre staring at him funny
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Another flaw is his sin i supposeeeeee but i'd rather not just dumb him down to guy who eats a lot cant stop eating food food food yknow -w- but well yknow. just how much WOULD his sin get in the way of things, bcuz it seems to consume him in a way thats wayyyy more intense than any of the other brothers sins interestingly enough
You'd have to deal with Belphie by extension too since they LOVE having the twins as a set that simply cannot be separated...... That also means having to always be dealing with Beel babying Belphie even though that man is very well GROWN. -100 EXP
he's crazy for saying this kinda thing all casual like also. do that in private man ☝🏿
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Belphie: Sorry I have to bring it up again even tho i know ppl are dead tired of hearing about but i STILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL think there shouldve been an actual proper talk and the appropriate amount of time given abt the killing instead of them moving right past it and MC being like 'it was just a lil oopsie we all have our bad days teehee ^-^'. if i got into a relationship with someone that tried and SUCCEEDED in killing me in this little magicverse i'd be like um. can we idk. talk about this in depth. You're not gonna kill me again in the future somehow right. Right?
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Also I see and understand people saying that quality time, words of affirmation and acts of service are very clearly things Belphie likes since he's constantly asking to be around you/hear our opinions on things and ask if you need help with things (even tho he can be kinda lousy at helping out honestly -_-) but he also has a problem with demanding things of the player.. not quite in the same way as Lucifer, but it's close. Like if I do not want you to head over to my room to sleep together (literal sleeping) then why are you inviting yourself over? 🗣️📣📣📣📣LISTEN TO MEEEEEEE & STAY IN YA ROOM❗ ❗ ❗❗
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He's a spoiled brat also! Like actual brat! Youngest syndrome is so very real with him, so if you're alright with being the main. well. person that has to do nearly everything then good'onya. I cannot imagine getting this dude dressed AND lugging this dude to classes all bcuz he wants to sleep in a little more ☝🏿 GET UP but if youre into being the main caregiver then shrugs
-10 MILLION POINTS DEDUCTED for being funnier than me also. thats a mistake no one should ever make ☝🏿
DIAVOLO: well. you see. so. there's. well. so um.
I do think he has a bittttt of an issue with choosing to completely overlook things. Diavolo is on a very thin line to me as a character bcuz I do think he is silly and fun at times and not 'AS' quick to read the room... and really is just essentially like... experiencing things for the first time and causing unintentional chaos because he's been so tied to his duties all his life but he's also like? Still very grown, smart and capable of quiet observation of others. (gestures to NB currently)
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I feel like he would be analyzing you all the time whether you realize it or not (for good or bad). He's just a lot more observant about things than you realize so while he WOULD use this for good to spoil you he would probably be reading into you as a person way too much. But in a lowkey manner. Not manipulatively per se just,,, I think you are still mainly like an intriguing pet to him at times, or something to study and take note of. Like he really just does whatever the hell he wants for his own pleasure. He made an entire fake beach and sun just cuz he wanted a beach day yknow what the hell. I get it but how did he do that. What other powers do you have
Impressing you could come off as belitting you unintentionally (not always but sometimes). OKAY WALK WITH ME HERE- for example. That one scene from Ouran High School when Tamaki is making a big show of trying 'commoners coffee'. I know what youre saying ur sayin 'But Carly that sounds more like something Mephisto would do' nonono I shake my head. Mephisto is not going to make a show of trying it he'll just outright be recommending YOU a specially made blend of his tastes to put YOU onto better things FIRST. Diavolo's DIVING IN first though. Dia would absolutely think it's some great big fun adventure to try 'normal' human world tea or coffee and comment on it. But like, if i was sitting across from this big hulking guy complimenting tea I drink normally in a 'Wow, so this is what humans drink. How inspiring.' I'd want to shake him since it unintentionally sounds like im being belittled -_-. Give me back my damn instant blend! ❗ ❗ He's thinking he's bonding with you and trying something from your culture (which yes he is), but does it warrant such grand showboating and amazement. It's just tea man. Just silently enjoy a cuppa instead of patting yourself on the back for being brave enough to try human tea </3
Or. Or. demanding your time on his schedule at the wrong times. He's The Prince why wouldn't you wanna drop everything and have dinner with him. 'Oh,,, you're busy 👉👈 oh what a shame.👉👈 we (Barbatos) prepared a nice lovely dinner! 👉👈 However, I suppose its quite alright if you do what you need to do. 👉👈 Eating alone tonight, be safe 👉👈' And then he sends a picture of the meal with eye emojis, do you get what im putting down
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One big flop for certain tho is him always being oh so busy. Like sit there and really imagine it. Dating a royal is already something but a Prince? Soon to be King? thats a lot of responsibility to juggle I know it'd get crazy balancing attention and schedules.
Also lets be real yall he's so used to being babied quite a bit, mainly by Barbatos. Barbatos is tough on him at times for his own good sure but he more-so spoils him still (hypocrite that he is!). are you ready to unintentionally be compared to that in terms of being able to care for Diavolo. Barbatos won't technically be competing with you either but as his main caregiver he'll still be inserting a lot of himself between the two of you. Also, that man is lowkey needy and has some lingering childhood issues you will have to be very careful with talking abt and comforting him for once he gets to a point to actually open up about it- so be mindful of these things
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Also he's insane. But if you're into insanity it's probably whatever.
BARBATOS: I know I am '''''''''barbatos ceo''''''''' so i have been very very very delusional about him but aside from being so very 'malewifecore' i'd place him on a scale of 1 -10 at a 8.5 (1 being worst mostl likely to flop partner ever, 10 being best). Looking at his character he's very much set on keeping a very decent distance between him and the player for quite some time so i think dating wise there's just so many things he'd never properly open up about. Or it'd take so very impossibly long.
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I remember reading his wiki one day and seeing this ^ (which btw theres a lot going on there.) so I feel like, even if he did really like you, he would most definitely always prioritize his work to the royal family first so.... he might potentially? be on the fence about further pursuing things with you even at one point??? Not to say that he isn't caring and attentive but I think he would greatly struggle with balancing his openness and affection towards you. And we must keep in mind that just like Mammon he ALSO has the Greed sin. He is a lot less likely to show it around others but he is very secretly possessive and makes it known occasionally so if you have problems with that it'd be interesting finding a balance with him. Secretly he 'will he or wont he' dude internally. But yea I've always thought it's so interesting that he'd say he just gives up. Makes you wonder and think more... but yet he wants to be bound by his lover. Very conflicting right? Which explains his struggles with desires and duty very well!
More on his duties though he's gonna overwork himself like crazy and it would be so tricky making plans or spending time together. Also he lowkey has insecurities about ONLY being tied to the butler role, much like how Leviathan will always bring up being a shut in. Like you are more than that cmon -_- youre gonna make MC feel bad! He must still be reassured a fair amount!
Something is also terribly wrong with him. but if you are insane like me you find that fun. Like oh he's tortured people? God forbid women do anything in this economy 🙄
Actual in person dating though <- she would be perplexed by his mysterious unnerving ways
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SIMEON: Simeon definitely high on the scale of being a good partner so he's A LOT less likely to flop on this list. BUT, he definitely seems to hold back on sharing his opinions or opening up about certain things with himself quite a bit. 😮 And I feel like he might be the type to try and keep the mood content and peaceful so it would be a bit hard to talk about the unpleasant things. He CAN talk about unpleasant things, dont get me wrong, but I get the feeling he'd be good at dodging certain things and saying what you feel like should be said. Especially if he isn't particularly ready to talk about something YET. Big emphasis on the YET. I imagine as his partner, if you are aware that he's constantly being a bit dodgy about certain topics constantly you would feel some way about it since it's easy to recognize when he's doing it. This isn't to say he's manipulative or a dishonest character, but I find that it would take a long time to really get to his core even if things are genuinely sweet and easygoing between you two.
Also its a genuine pet-peeve for some people to deal with others that arent all that tech savvy? If you show him a meme on your phone he's gonna grab the whole thing, not get it at all, say 'who is this?' in confusion, try to zoom in and when he taps the screen it's gonna switch to a different picture/app and he'll be like 'What happened to it :(' which I think is hilarious and cute; but once again, could be something that genuinely annoys ppl, and annoyances over little quirks DO build up over time! Still adore him tho mwah
SOLOMON: Something is wrong with him. 🚶🏿‍♀️ That's his flaw. 🚶🏿‍♀️ Like something is just deeply wrong with him and he's way too casual about it. 🚶🏿‍♀️ He's literally that post where it's like 'yea something happened to your boyfriend and he came back all wrong. yea. sorry. we don't know what happened.'
If you're the type that stresses about things or worries a lot or finds that very easy-going people annoy you then well... Solomon will annoy you.
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Im not saying he's not going to be attentive to you because he's shown to be very active and forward in a lot of ways, but I'm talking more along the lines of unintentionally dismissing things. Like for me personally I need a bit of guidance and structure and direction and if I don't see that I will be forced to take the lead. Just depends on how you are as a person really!
Let's get the most obvious thing out of the way though he can never cook you a fancy meal. Not everyone can cook we all have our different strengths that is for certain but if you don't tell him straight up, or constantly You're Going To Have To Eat His Food.
He may or may not be the reason you constantly get into situations also, in between Levi's games and Diavolo's chaos, Solomon is pretty much the main reason so many situations happen in events!? fhskfs I think that would increase in dating him even if he does actually do his best to look out for you in his own way.
But he's also like. Just a guy to me. Which is crazy because besides the mental illness + genuinely being playful with the MC, there is surprisingly a lot to him that is just. not touched on writing wise. or not explored. so I can admit there are other things that aren't coming to mind really. He's just there to me.
Apparently he's very forgetful with important dates also so if thats something that bothers you then well </3
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MEPHY: of course in comparison to the others we do not know AS much abt Mephisto but looking a mile away you know his elitism is his main flaw. He would be very uppity with you and not realize whats wrong with that per se, even though he's so quick to call out the rudeness or impoliteness of others
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his main flop is that he's going to be dramatic as hell at some point whether intentionally or not. he is definitely the guy to tell you he's fine while he's visibly shaking fists clenched trying to act unbothered when he really wants to complain to someone. He may very well go running to Satan or Dia for advice regarding the two of you if he really needs a second opinion without directly consulting you. So yes, those guys will also be privy to your business by extension. I know Belphie's also in the anti-luci league but can we really count on him for advice when Satan is most definitely the more dependable choice? anyways
Mephisto is also literally the image of the boyfriend walking with his girlfriend looking back at another girl. But the other girl is Dia. He's looking back at Dia sorry... that's his childhood buddy. He's so obsessed with that guy.............. You're gonna hear him going woe is me a lot over losing his buddy to his duties and the Prince always having his attention on Luci.... it just is what it is :/ Me personally also I just feel like I would get into mini arguments with him a lot. he is my rival and my bestie in my mind that I want to strangle whenever he opens his mouth
Like he is a BRAGGER by nature. And if you do not like people that brag about the littlest things he is going to get on your nerves. And since he also seems to come from a royal/rich background he is most definitely spoiled and parades through life with the expectation that others will treat him with appropriate amounts of respect. And due to his riches he could indirectly insult you at some point no matter what your financial status is, he may unintentionally make a comment that's in poor taste. Like if you take him to your favorite hole in the wall restaurant for a chill date he's going to say things even if he doesn't actually mean to come off as prudish.
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He'd make an effort at least if youre getting him to try new things and he's not necessarily THAT uptight. He gets involved with things and has fun still!.... sometimes! But in reference to what I mentioned about Dia earlier with the whole commoners coffee thing this is another example to compare. Dia trying a burger for the first time would be like: "Ah! So this is what it's like to enjoy something this simple. The taste is rather interesting but I quite like it! Perhaps I will ask Barbatos if he can add this homestyle method to our regular menu :D" Whereas Meph is taking bites with his knife and fork like: "Hm. They really ought to improve the production cost and quality for these things. Oh, No I never said i disliked it, I'm merely making a note of something. Not bad though."
RAPHAEL: once again in comparison to the others we do not know AS much about him compared to the 'main' group. so im going off the little that i have witnessed in game and trying my hardest not to confuse that with fanposts but... He's so terribly blunt and unaware of things. He's a bit similar to Beel in that regard that he dives first into things and seems rather uncaring or dismissive about something due to his bluntness. But he's like BLUNT blunt, like blunt to the max even. Like this is crazy to me. how is it that LUCIFER is saying you're too much for him.
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So he would most definitely struggle with being way too blunt towards YOU... it would take awhile for him to ease up on that I believe.
I'll be honest he kinda just. Sits there quietly really. I imagine trying to talk to him can feel a little bit like dealing with a brick wall, because I think it would be hard to understand what's going on in his mind at times, not to mention being tied down with his strictness.
And not to mention his sense of justice and penchant for casually mentioning violence seems to completely overpower him at the flip of a switch. I mean if you're cool with him threatening to use his spear on people that annoy you then so be it.
I don't know really, he's just so neurodivergent to me so i cant really call him a flop for that he just exhibits so many of those traits, it's just something you'd have to work on with him or get accustomed to
-ONE BILLION TRILLION POINTS DEDUCTED FOR LIKING SOLOMONS FOOD THO 100000000000000 EXP
THIRTEEN: once again in comparison to the others we do not know AS much about her compared to the 'main' group.
but she is most def on the LEAST likely to flop at dating you end of the list, cuz she quite LITERALLY is upfront about liking the player a lot more quickly than the others. she's literally so cute and just minds her business until OTHER people bother her peace. She does have tsundere-like qualities sure, but if you're direct with her she does eventually come around to expressing why she does what she does. And I don't think she would ever mess with the length of your lifespan just bcuz the two of you have a little disagreement or something. To someone else though for fun, sure:
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that aside tho i can't particularly point out any major flaws in the moment i love her so bad. someone would have to sell me on it, but also why arent you supporting womens wrongs hm? 🤨🤨🤨🤨
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tortadecereji · 1 year
Text
So, me and my friend @megamispe rewatched Monters vs Alians lately. My first thought? Why not make a komaeda centred au based on that lol. My computer broke, so I haven't drawn all the characters, but here's some doodles.
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I'm having lots of fun with this au, so ill probably post more of it later. (Feel free to ask me about it if you'd like!)
Also, check Mega's twitter account, she gave me a lot of ideas for this au!!
The story would follow the same line as the movie, except that I added some stuff, so here's about the characters for now if you'd like to know:
Nagito Komaeda: Pretty much the same thing that happens to Susan in the movie, except... he's Komaeda...
Nagito was supposed to marry Byakuya the day a large meteor hit him. Said meteor contained a large amount of radiation that Komaeda ended up absorbing at the impact. Of course, he survived the incident due to his luck.
However, the radiation began affecting his body during the ceremony, which caused his previously light brown hair to turn white and his height to increase unbelievably huge. With that the wedding has been ruined, the guests were scared for their lives, Byakuya was grossed out by him now, and a monster containment organization has been called to capture him. The only ones who did worry about Nagito were Sonia and Gundham, but they could do nothing to stop him from being captured. Komaeda blames himself and his luck for ruining what should be the happiest day of his life and convinced himself that no matter what he tried, his chances of having the loving family he always longed for would always be taken away from him.
Byakuya Togami: He's the heir of the Togami corporation—just like in canon— and was about to marry Komaeda more for status and money than love. Nagito's family was loaded and had control over many interesting businesses for Togami, that's why he chose to marry Nagito, who was the only person left in his family. But once the radiation took over Komaeda, Byakuya gave up on the idea instantly. He did not want to deal with a giant-sized Komaeda, thinking that would ruin his image and career. It's not like Nagito has his family's assets now that he's a monster, so he's not interesting to Byakuya anymore. (Togami is a fucking asshole in this au, I'm sorry, Togami fans)
Sonia Nevermind + Gundham Tanaka: They're Nagito's best friends. Since Nagito's parents are dead, they're the ones who always help him out, including at his wedding. They were the only ones who were more for Komaeda himself after the meteor episode. Gundham even tried to stop some of the soldiers from the organization, but that was in vain, he and Sonia were pulled out of the area as well as the rest of the guests.
Eventually, when the monsters get Mukuro's permission to leave the containment base, Komeada goes directly to Gundham and Sonia's house so they know he's okay. Both Sonia and Gundham don't mind his new form, they're just happy to have their best friend back safe and sound.
Bonus: Gundham says that Nagito has reached his true form and that he knew from the start that Nagito wasn't entirely human. Komaeda shrugged it off as he knows it's just Gundham's dramatic way of speaking.
Mukuro Ikusaba: She takes the role of R. Monger.
Mukuro is a very talented soldier who got promoted to be in charge of area fifty-something(yes, the same as the movie. I'm not creative), where the monsters are being kept. She's cold looking and very straight to the point, but she also has a soft spot for the monsters she takes care of. That being said, she goes on her way to make sure they're comfortable in their new forever home, even if they can't escape to the outside world due to how humans would react.
After some months after Nagito's containment, Mukuro received the information that a huge alien robot bear had arrived on earth and proved to be a threat as it was killing innocent people and causing despair all over the place. Mukuro convinced the government to use the monsters to fight the robot since not even the armed force could, and in exchange, the monsters could finally be free.
Needless to say that Mukuro cared a lot for them, so she was very nervous about this decision as they could get hurt or even die.
Chiaki Nanami: Chiaki is a werebat. She has been in area fifty-something since she was 15. She's now 23.
Nanami has been found by the monster containment organization with one of her wings broken, so it was easier for them to capture her. It was a scary experience, she hated it there, but things improved when she met the Ultimate Hope, who she only calls Hajime(or Izuru if he's in control), they got attached very quickly as they noticed they were both very lonely and had problems socializing with the others monsters in the facility.
When she was 18, Mukuro got her promotion. Chiaki was cautious about her at first, but that soon changed as Ikusaba showed the monsters genuine care. Mukuro even gifted Chiaki a portable game console, which led to Nanami hyperfixation on games.
Nanami got interested in Nagito almost instantly, when he got into the facility, because of her curiosity. She surely hadn't planned that, but after some months, she and Hajime had developed a very strong bond with the white-haired man.
Hajime/Izuru(Ultimate Hope): The Ultimate Hope was born from a failed experiment a mad scientist performed on his son—Hajime Hinata— when the boy was 5 years old to try and stuff all talents known in the child's brain. That resulted in the creation of Izuru, however, the scientist hadn't expected Hajime's memories and soul to still be alive after the experiment. The Ultimate Hope was captured by the monster containment organization right after said experiment when they ended up killing their father in a post-trauma rage assessment.
Hajime and Izuru, despite showing different personalities, are the same person. They have the same feelings, same memories, same body... if, somehow, they were to be split apart, it'd be similar to cutting off a body member.
Hajime and Izuru intercalate who's in control of their body depending on the situation, Hajime being more in control during social and support situations, and Izuru during situations that require a bit more logic. Usually, Hajime's the one in control and izuru appears as his shadow. The same happens when Izuru takes control, but Hajime's the one being his shadow.
As previously mentioned, they take interest in Nagito and decide to approach him alongside Chiaki.
Akane Owari: She's a werewolf. Surprisingly the most difficult one to capture.
Akane has been found in a small village scaring some villagers away so she could steal their food and bring them to her younger siblings.
The monster containment organization tried to capture her more than once, but she always escaped using her inhuman speed. She also put up a fight leaving many soldiers harmed, but never killed them. She has only been captured one day when she came back to her cave and couldn't find her siblings anywhere. She lost the will to fight and let herself be captured.
She still don't know where they are, and that worries her very much, but she allowed herself to enjoy her new life since she not only got free food in the facility, but also got along pretty well with the other monsters.
King Monokuma: It is a gigantic alien robot that Junko sent to earth, in Japan to be precise, to torment the humans and bring them despair. However, King Monokuma is merely a distraction from her actual takeover plan.
She knew that the robot bear would get the world's attention, having most of the countries send resources that they believed would help take it down, as King Monokuma was believed to be a menace not only to Japan, but to the rest of the world too.
Still, even with how strong the robot was, it was defeated by the monsters strangely easily.
Junko Enoshima: Junko is an alien that destroyed her own planet. She's completely in love with despair and wants every living being to feel it.
It's always the same plan, she sends one of her Monokumas to scare the inhabitants of the planet she chose, and kills a bunch of people, only sparing a few that she thought that'd make wonderful remnants of despair and make them destroy their home planet themselves...
She'd watch the chaos and also plan more despairing things to do with the planet's inhabitants, like different types of killing games, until she gets bored and went to the next planet.
But earth is a little special for her, as it would not be the first time she'd be there. This time, she's eager to see a certain soldier again, but not only that, she wants the amount of power that had been contained within Komaeda(of course she doesn't knows that he's the one who has been hit by that meteor...yet).
Bonus thingy: Hajime/Izuru and Chiaki teach Nagito how to feel love. The trio + Mukuro and Akane become a founding family!!!
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lamnwar · 2 years
Note
Hello!! I was wondering if I could get some headcanons with Kiyoshi and murasakibara about you meeting their family for the first time? (Reader and characters are in a relationship)
Thank you so much (⊃。•́‿•̀。)⊃
Hiiii 🥰 loved that you've requested two of my favourite boys so this is so fun to me <3 hope you enjoy it too!
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AREN'T THEY LOVELY? // KNB Headcanons
Context: you meet your boyfriend's family for the first time, how does it go?
Pairings: Kiyoshi + Murasakibara x gn! Reader
Warnings: none, fluffy fluff, mention of marriage even because yeah 🤭
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KIYOSHI
He's so hyped to make you meet his grandparents!
It's so cute, because he's been talking about you to them since day 1, so they're really impatient to meet you
They're also the only family he has so it's very important for him that you meet them
Which makes you fairly nervous, you understand how much this matters to Teppei
You'll probably go have lunch to their place (they insisted on it)
It'll be love at first sight for them too
They will shower you in compliments (now you see where your boyfriend got it), telling you that you are so beautiful and cute
And don't count on Kiyoshi to stop them from praising you, if anything, he'll encourage it
His grandma will certainly insist on showing you Teppei's childhood's pictures
They're very jovial people so you're guaranteed to laugh a lot in their presence
You'll definitely get bonus points for helping them around (even though they beg you to sit down and enjoy)
Won't let you leave without boxes of food
They'll basically adopt you because this is just how much they love you
Will probably have a serious talk with Teppei to tell him that he should think of marriage because they are convinced that you are the one
That will fluster you a bit, but they might be right, you know?
MURASAKIBARA
Now, see, he has a huge family (both literally and figuratively)
So you're intimidated when he brings it up
Not to mention that he's very casual about it
"You're coming for diner at my parents' tomorrow?"
Literally, he'll ask it like it's nothing
You say yes, but you are frankly quite nervous
What you aprehend the most is if his siblings will like you
He doesn't talk much about them, but you know that Atsushi matters a lot to his siblings since he's the last one
So when you go to his family house of the first time, you are scared
Imagine being surrounded by a bunch of giants with bored eyes and purple hair
But the fear doesn't last long
His siblings are less unexpressive than him, so they show easily that they like you
Same goes for his parents, they appreciate that you are so good at loving their boy <3
They will feed you so well!
Overall you'll win over all of their hearts, because there's no reason for them not to love you
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steampoweredwerehog · 5 months
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oooo is there any lore you can drop about Seiv and the crew?
After doing some more brainstorming, indeed there is!
“Giant Country” is separated from the rest of society by something called The Stepp—a huge tectonic plate boundary that forms a 1,000ft cliff across the entire length of the continent. Giants used to be more wide-spread, but moved atop the cliff as smaller humanoid populations exploded.
Thaddeus is the prince of a human kingdom, but the world also has dwarves, elves, etc. Thad has 2 elves & a dwarf with him (naming them soon.) The relic he’s looking for is known in legend, but most common people doubt it exists. If his family or the giants’ elite find it, war could break out. This is precisely what Thaddeus wants to prevent.
Giant Lore~: Giants tend to live in small towns & only have a few major cities. Food has huge cultural importance, to the point that stealing from someone’s plate is super rude & fancy dinners are a common form of courting. Seiv works at a bakery, but loves cooking most. This bish would absolutely have a cooking tiktok, those artsy ones with just music. He’s always has a soft spot & fascination with smaller people, one he’s learned to keep to himself over the years. Thaddeus is guilty of the inverse. Bonus tidbit: Their mattresses are slightly rounded cuz giants like to make blanket nests <3
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an-angels-fury · 1 year
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About the 'Creature's appearence' Discourse
SIDE 1:
"Why do adaptations always make the Frankenstein's Creature so ugly?! Victor said in the book he only selected the most beautiful and simmetrical human parts to build him! There was clearly something uncanny and unnatural about the Creature's appearence since, you know, he was still a 8-foot tall guy with yellow skin and creepy yellow eyes, but it doesn't really mean he was aesthethically ugly!"
SIDE 2:
"Uh have any of you truly read the book?! The Creature's described multiple times, by Frankenstein, Walton and himself, as a hideous, mummy-like and deformed being! His yellow skin was translucent enough to see the veins and arteries in his body! Victor TRIED to make him beautiful but the huge constrast between all those parts put together only made him look even more scary! It was his monstrous appearence that caused every people he met to react in extreme violence towards him!"
YOU KNOW WHAT?! ENOUGH! MY BRAIN'S ABOUT TO EXPLODE 'CAUSE I CAN'T TAKE THIS SHIT ANY LONGER!
I LOVE YOU 'GIANT MUMMY' ADAM 💀💛
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And
I LOVE YOU 'GOTH PRINCE' ADAM 💜🖤
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YOU ALL ARE FUCKING FABULOUS AND PERFECT 😍😍😍
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Also, as a little bonus:
I LOVE YOU 'BALD-AND-STITCHED' ADAM 🪡🧵
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I LOVE YOU 'GREEN MONSTER' ADAM 💚 🔩
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I LOVE YOU 'FUNNY BLUE MONSTER' ADAM 💙
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I LOVE YOU 'CRAZY WEIRDO' ADAM 🤡
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I LOVE YOU 'MUSICAL SEXY' ADAM 😎 🎶
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Basically, my point is: In the end of the day, everyone will have their own image of how our baby Creech looked in the novel and their favorite depiction of the character.
I don't expect my post to end this endless discourse, but I think I need to remind some people that all the interpretations of the Creature (and Frankenstein in general) are totally valid (one of the things that makes this story and fandom so amazing) and just because someone see things differently from you, it doesn't mean the other person is wrong or idiot.
That's it. Thanks for your attention, FrankieFreaks. Love ya 😘
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monstersdownthepath · 7 months
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Lord of Vengeance and Cold: Kostchtchie, the Deathless Frost
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CR 26
Chaotic Evil Huge Outsider
Bestiary 4, pg. 48-49
Let's clear up the most important bit first: There's actually two official pronunciations for this repugnant Demon Lord's name, so use whichever one you see fit: KOSH-chuh-chai, or kosh-TIK-ti-kai. I prefer the first, as it's closer to his real-world folkloric inspiration in Koschei the Deathless, with whom he shares far more than just a name. Unlike his real-world inspiration, though, Kostchtchie (which I'll be shortening to Kostch from now on) actually DID eventually run afoul of Baba Yaga, and what happened is likely to surprise no one. Already a powerful and feared warlord, Kostch had conquered every enemy he had ever faced except the looming specter of death, and demanded that Baba Yaga make him immortal. Rather than slaying him outright for his impolite request, refusing him service, or transforming him into an unliving yet unaging material, the Queen of Witches was for some reason moved to grant him his request... but, as these stories go, not in the way he wanted.
She tore apart his soul, twisted his body, and broke his mind. Being turned into a statue would have, perhaps, been more merciful.
Portions of his soul were sealed inside of a torc which, while sustaining him like a lich's reliquary, could also be used to command him. The body he was proud of became infused with the essence of the Abyss to turn him into the demonic brute Baba Yaga saw him as. When these torments concluded, she left him to pick up the shattered remains of his ego. Given that she immediately discarded the Torc for someone else to find, granted him demonic resilience and might, and fermented his hatred for giants into a hatred for humanity and turned him from a warlord into a force of nature, it's difficult to say if Baba Yaga did any of this to punish him, or as part of a plan to punish everyone else for allowing such a man to exist. Perhaps, like many of her more eccentric actions, she did it on a whim, or perhaps she did it as part of a plan for the future. Kostch doesn't care one way or another; all he desires now is vengeance, and achieving this vengeance requires nothing less than the destruction of Baba Yaga and everything she's ever created... along with every single other powerful woman in existence out of pure misogynistic spite.
Fun fact: Kostch is such a raging woman-hater that it actually grants him mechanical benefit. He has Favored Enemy, granting him +4 to a suite of checks and rolls against humans (not Humanoids! specifically humans) and Giants, but this bonus is doubled to +8 against women. It's more than a little funny (in a miserable sort of way) to me that he's so pathetically hate-filled because a woman 'dared to best him,' and I have much more to say on the subject--some of which involves pointing out the size of his arms and the jokes I could make on it--but to go further with the joke would take away from Kostch's legitimately threatening kit. So, let's take a look...
Kostch calling himself "Deathless" is not an empty boast. Unlike pretty much every other Outsider in existence, Kostch did not actually die, nor has he once been slain during his ascension to the rank of Demon Lord. He was transformed into a demonic shape by Baba Yaga, and fled to the Abyss willingly to fill the cracks in his body and mind with its essence, going from human to mutant to demon without his soul fleeing its corporeal vessel even once. He retains his (heavily twisted) human appearance, a perfect memory of his life from before, and all the skills he once had, and all of these worry other demons, because if he could do it, maybe more people could. While he's incredibly young for a Demon Lord at only 2500 years old, others are nonetheless wary of him because he ascended to his Lord rank so quickly, and because of his relatively short tenure, very few are aware of the full extents of his power or what tricks he may yet be hiding from them.
"Frost" isn't an exaggeration of his talents either (please keep all 'best served cold' jokes to yourself). Though he has no means to penetrate Cold Resistance or Immunity, he has no real need due to the quality of his frost spells: At-will Cone of Cold to blast a 60ft area with 15d6 Cold damage whenever he wishes, a 3/day Polar Ray to shoot a single target for 25d6 Cold damage and some paltry Dex drain, and most dangerously Polar Midnight 1/day to engulf an area in freezing, murderous darkness. That last one is why he has no reason or need to pierce Cold resistance; if he did, he couldn't drop that spell into his own space and punish anyone who tried to stand and Full-Attack him while safe from the majority of the spell's effects. Anyone who doesn't move at all on their turn while they're inside Polar Midnight is instantly, unavoidably frozen over, trapped in a layer of ice until someone frees them (as they're rendered helpless). Since Kostch has a permanent Freedom of Movement and can Greater Teleport at will as a spell-like ability, he has no issue freeing himself if he ends up hoist by his own petard in the spell's area... or he can avoid it entirely and just take a move action each round while keeping up his DPS via Greater Vital Strike.
Even creatures immune to Cold can still be trapped by Polar Midnight's freezing effect, or his 1/day Mass Icy Prison, a spell that can potentially paralyze or entangle an entire party at once. Even if one succeeds the save, they're still entangled and taking 26 Cold damage every round until something scrapes the ice from them. Once a victim is frozen over or, hell, even when they're perfectly fine and not really inconvenienced by his magic, Kostch enters the fray to do what he REALLY wants: Hit you over and over again with a really, really big hammer. Sorcery is fine and all, it can be convenient when someone won't hold still, and his endless supply of thrown boulders (2d8+13) are alright for buzzing annoyances at a range, but Kostch began his life as a warlord beating people to death with a hunk of iron on a stick, and by god has he gotten really good at it over the years.
This is no mere hunk of iron, though, this is a +5 Adamantine Icy Burst Warhammer sized for a Huge creature and wielded by a creature with a 15ft space and reach. It weighs well over a ton and appropriately hits like a car upwards to four times a round, every blow dealing 3d6+24 +1d6 Cold damage (+4 vs humans and Giants, +8 vs women)... Or, rather, 3d6+40, since Kostch's lore block states he more or less ALWAYS uses his Power Attack, taking a meager -8 penalty to his stacked attack rolls in favor of more damage, which works well with his warhammer's x3 damage if it critically strikes. If he can't Full-Attack, he can use Greater Vital Strike to throw out a single devastating swing for 12d6+40 +1d6 Cold damage! Given that he can wield that intimidating weapon in just one hand, his other hand is open to weave in a single slam each round for 1d8+19 damage, but we'll get to why that's much better than it looks in just a moment.
It should be said that Kostch has a particularly jarring ability: Vengeful Strike. Once per round, he can AoO any creature that hits him in melee. It's a very simple ability that nonetheless allows him to keep piling on damage even outside of his turn, akin to the Legendary Actions of 5e! Compared to most Demon Lords, Kostch's statblock is rather plain, but some of the abilities he DOES have are doozies with multiple moving parts. The first is Crushing Blow, something he can use once a round with his hammer. It's one of those abilities he must declare before he rolls his attack and is wasted if he misses, but given that he's got a +53 (usually +45 due to Power Attack) to the first attack roll he makes with it a round, he's unlikely to miss anything but the most ridiculously buffed Heavy Armor + Tower Shield Enjoyer. Upon hitting with the Crushing Blow, the attack ignores both hardness and DR AND he gets to make a free trip attempt (+52) versus the victim at no risk to himself and without any restrictions based on size. A victim crushed by the blow also has to make a DC 44 Fortitude save or be stunned for 1 round and staggered for 1d4 more, but even if they succeed they're staggered, which can severely cut down on their ability to fight back or escape him. A major problem, because like most Demon Lords he's only vulnerable to a scant handful of attacks (DR 20/Cold Iron, Epic, and Good, and 30 Regeneration only shut down by deific or Mythic sources), attacks you really want to be able to throw out multiple of every round. There's no per-day limit to his Crushing Blow and no immunity clause built in if you succeed your save, so he can just keep using it round after round to stun and stagger so long as he keeps hitting successfully.
The second and objectively the way funnier important ability in his kit is Clutch Foe, which he can use as part of the Grab attached to his slam attack. When he uses just one hand to grapple a Medium or smaller target, he can choose to lift that creature off their feet and hold them in his grip. This has the side-effect of making his grapple easier to escape, imposing a -20 penalty to his grapple checks... which means it goes from +56 to +36, giving him a decent chance to keep hold of most martial characters and almost certainly lets him clutch casters. Each round as a swift action, Kostch can then choose one of three options: Crush his foe, dealing his slam damage plus an extra 1d8+28 damage; throw his foe in any direction he wants (which is treated as a bull rush, a maneuver he gets +54 to); or the last and most hysterical option: wielding his victim as an improvised weapon. A Medium creature wielded in this manner deals 3d6+19 (weapon sized for a Huge creature + his Str mod) damage to anything it hits, and the victim themselves takes half that damage back, doubling the number of creatures being harmed every time Kostch swings around his new Club of Screaming Pain.
If you think it's unlikely he'll be able to hold onto someone long enough to use them as a bludgeon, remember that he has more than a few ways to render someone helpless via icy entanglement... And also Power Word Stun. Or he can just teleport or Time Stop and walk to the weakest person in the party and grab them like a squeaky toy. I appreciate that he has Catch Off-Guard to make sure he's not penalized for attacking with an improvised wizard, but if I were to improve his kit, I'd give him the Two-Weapon Fighting line to allow him iterative attacks with a grappled foe. I just think it'd be funny.
You can read more about him here.
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bigsnzstanacct · 1 month
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Just thinking about dialogue snippets where a character teases a Giant!Sneezer about their condition or berates/humiliates them for having sneezes that are just TOO huge and dramatic. Like:
"Ugh, your buildup is way too exaggerated, why can't you just go outside and blow down some trees like a normal person. No need to cause a windstorm and warn the entire neighbour every time you feel a little tickle!"
"No. We might both have huge, maybe even Gigantic, sneezes. but there's a difference between a nice, big, well controlled sneeze like mine and your freak of nature explosions that could leave a demolition company out of job.
Some people may say "there's no such a thing as too big when it comes to sneezes" but you'd send them flying if they ever decided to watch one of yours. "
"Jeez, watch where you aim that nose of yours! I know having truly big sneezes is difficult, and in your case, holding them back only makes them even bigger,
But if you can't even stop them long enough to find a deserted alleyway, in a few years we might need to live in a deserted island and pray your sneezes don't cause a hurricane in whatever poor country's direction you happen to blow in!"
(Bonus points if the character teasing them for said Giant!sneezes eventually gets a new allergy or a growth spurt that when associated to prideful denial leads to even more catastrophic results than the sneezes they one day judged.)
AHHHHHHH Anon I am so into this I am a little stressed about reading it in public, like especially the second one?? I honestly have A Thing about big sneeze shaming/humiliation and specifically the word “freak” around that like… yeah. It’s pushing some buttons for me. Whew! Honestly it’s hot as a sincere thing but also so hot to me in a BDSM context? Giant sneezer being shamed for how big and dangerous they sneeze and their inability to hold back etc etc
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cogneato-inc · 8 months
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The Gang+ Roadtrip Headcanons
(Unfinished and never going to be but I wanted to post what I have </3-)
Absolutely loves road trips, is packed days in advance, needs to see every tourist trap and truck stop:
Brett
Is PUMPED - he loves everything about road trips
Sitting in the passenger seat giving directions, driving and jamming with the music as loud as possible, sitting in the back and pointing out animals and funny signs
Very susceptible to billboards - if he’s driving he stops at every tourist attraction/interesting truck stop/sightseeing platform and loves it Every Time
Buys a souvenir from every state he goes through (but it’s always something Huge and Inconvenient to keep in the car, like a cowboy hat or a big ass sign that everyone tells him not to buy)
His road trip playlists are Elite - always classics, or a mix of everyone’s favorites so no one can complain too much
Glenn
Takes his kids on road trips !!! It kills his back but he loves taking them to historical monuments and whatnot
(Not relevant but he absolutely seems like the kind of man who Fucking Loves historical re-enactments ?? He’s out there I know it in my heart)
Everyone hates when he’s allowed to drive because he has terrible road rage and refuses to stop for bathroom breaks or food - not to make good time, but just because he likes The Power
But he’s also good at keeping himself awake so he’s usually the driver at night when the roads are empty
(He still manages to find the one other person on the road and gets cut off or something, curses them out and wakes everyone up-)
Andre
Big fan of terrible roadside attractions - shit like ugly dinosaur sculptures and giant household objects in the middle of nowhere
Loves ridiculous billboards, his camera roll is 90% billboard pictures after the trip
You might think he’s in charge of the snacks but you’d be WRONG
He Will Forget Them
Or only pack edibles and wait for everyone else to realize
Likes to get to the destination as fast as possible, groans every time the others ask to stop:
Reagan
I headcanon she gets carsick super easily and hates the cramped feeling of having to sit near all of the bags/other people
So by the time the trip is over she is LAUNCHING herself out of the car
In the driver’s seat most of the time to avoid the worst of her carsickness (enjoys the added bonus of being able to threaten the others by withholding stops for snacks-)
Robotus
Would probably enjoy it more if he could get out of the car </3
If he’s repaired and has some sort of disguise he actually really likes stopping at the little sightseeing spots (and some of the ridiculous tourist traps but he’ll never admit it)
Makes a snarky comment abt EVERY religious billboard he sees - is absolutely insufferable when going through rural areas
J.R.
I’m not sure how you would even get this man to go on a road trip ???
‘Why can’t I just take my private jet >:(‘
It takes a lot of convincing, I would not be surprised if he’s straight up Never been on a road trip
And he doesn’t,, hate it ? If it’s just the two of you he has fun - but he makes Frequent comments abt how much faster you could have been at your destination (and also probably just,, better destinations that you can’t drive to) if you’d flown
If the rest of The Gang is there he’s miserable - being surrounded by people the whole time has him So So Carsick, he insists on driving as much as possible
Hates it, complains the whole trip:
Myc
He can’t get out of the car, he isn’t allowed to drive (for Several reasons), and No One will let him play his podcast when it’s his turn with the aux
He is Complaining or Sleeping the entire time
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Text
𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐎𝐃𝐔𝐂𝐈𝐍𝐆… 𝐌𝐘 𝐋𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐄𝐑𝐀 𝐎𝐑𝐈𝐆𝐈𝐍𝐀𝐋 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐑, 𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐋𝐀 𝐆𝐎𝐌𝐄𝐙
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❝ Ever since she was a young witch, No Maj-born and new to this magical world, being taught in the halls of Ilvermorny School, Mariela had longed to see Hogwarts. She had heard the stories her teachers told about it and listened to the tales spouted by her classmates who had magical family in the United Kingdom, her attention fully focused on the descriptions of the huge castle in the Scottish highlands with its constantly shifting staircases and huge lake that housed a giant squid. And though she loved her own school, loved being in Thunderbird house and learning all about this secret wonderful world that she’d been unaware of for the first eleven years of her life, there was still a significant part of her that wanted to experience Hogwarts’s magnificence someday.
And so, many years after she’d graduated Ilvermorny and become a teacher at it herself, Mariela was unable to resist when she heard that Hogwarts was seeking a new teacher for their Muggle Studies course. She’d put in her application, packed her bags, and moved to England, and blessedly found that not only was Hogwarts all she’d dreamed it would be, but that she took to her new position like a fish to water. She got along well with her students, who loved the amount of respect and consideration she had for them (as well as her seemingly endless supply of American candy) and having grown up in a non-magical household, it was agreed among both students and her fellow faculty that she was incredibly well-suited for teaching her subject.
Mariela also managed to get along quite well with her fellow teachers, in particular the new Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher. (And with the exception of the surly Potions professor, since Mariela never hesitated to take points away from any disrespectful students from his house, but she didn’t think much of him anyway.) Remus Lupin, as quiet and withdrawn as he was, was also kind and intelligent and incredibly interesting to talk to, and Mariela liked him instantly. He seemed to like her as well, which was always a bonus, and with all the nights they spent together chatting in her office, sipping tea and talking about everything and nothing - or, well, Remus sipped tea, Mariela sipped coffee and refused to even have a drop of what she called “hot leaf water” - it wasn’t exactly a surprise that Mariela found herself developing deeper feelings for him.
But then Mariela discovered two things that forever changed the way she saw Remus. First, that he was a werewolf, which wasn’t a problem for her at all; second, that he apparently knew the supposedly crazed and murderous fugitive the whole of Hogwarts had been fearing all year, and was definitely in love with him, which was a problem. Mariela did her best to not be crushed by this knowledge; after all, she had no claim to Remus and really just wanted him to happy, and Sirius Black actually seemed like a pretty good guy, despite what everyone seemed to think about him. Plus, it turned out that he was actually innocent of the crimes he’d been convicted of and was in fact the Savior of the Wizarding World’s godfather, so there was also that.
And though Mariela was understandably upset when Remus was forced to resign and leave Hogwarts, she made a promise to him that she would look out for Harry Potter and his friends, since she would have done almost anything for him. But in an unexpected turn of events, it turned out that making that promise also wound up tasking her with looking after Sirius Black in the form of a large dog as he hid out in a cave close to Hogwarts, bringing him food when she could and occasionally just popping in to check if he were still alive and hadn’t yet been found by the wizarding authorities. It wasn’t always an easy task, but Mariela wasn’t complaining; it soothed Remus’s anxiety, which was her goal, and besides, Sirius was actually very funny and nice to talk to, when he was in human form.
The only thing is, the more time Mariela spends in the cave talking to Sirius, the more she finds herself feeling something deeper for him. The same something she felt about Remus, and still feels about Remus. And all this in the midst of a growing darkness in the Wizarding World, a war ended over a decade ago potentially coming back for a second act, and Mariela trying her best to keep an incredibly selflessly reckless young man and his two friends from getting themselves killed every other week.
Mariela never thought she’d say this, but she’s starting to wish she’d left Hogwarts alone. ❞
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Wizarding World Taglist: @manyfandomocs, @of-asters-and-roses.
General Taglist: @hiddenqveendom, @foxesandmagic, @artemisocs, @reyofluke-ocs,
@endless-oc-creations, @stanshollaand, @ginnystilinski-reblogs, @luucypevensie,
@ginger-grimm, @arrthurpendragon, @fakedatings, @impales, @claryxjackson,
@dancingsunflowers-ocs, @eddysocs, @lucys-chen, @ocappreciationtag.
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centaurisolarflare · 1 year
Note
Im just imagining königs family are all tall-ass giraffes and youre the only shorty in that group. And youre always the target for short jokes whether you like it or not.
You want könig? Gotta power through the short jokes man!
But on the plus side, they'll defend and protect you when someone else mocks you for your height. Theyre the only ones who can bully you >:3
OKAY OKAY BUT LIKE. YOU'RE SO RIGHT. They just think you're so cute and they're not really used to someone so short being around regularly.
They'd absolutely give you shit at every possible opportunity; if there's ever even the slightest chance to make a short joke one of them is going to turn to you with a shit-eating grin and take it. I think at first König would try to shield you as best he could from it – asking his older relatives to please not be rude, scolding his younger siblings/cousins, etc – but as soon as he knows you're fine with it there's no restraining anyones comments.
I think it'd be extra funny if you also work in the military because like, you've been trained to kill – not just kill though, this isn't amateur hour, you take people and organizations out with precision – and these giants are just cooing over you. Same vibes as holding an angry cat out at arms length and calling it 'just the cutest little baby ever'.
If you ever make a joke about your height, they're going to fucking loose it. Start snarking back about them being "tall-ass giraffes" and they're going to propose to you on König's behalf. His brother is like "König this is my sibling-in-law now" with his arm slung over your shoulders, and König is like 'what the fuck happened, I just left to run into town', and it's all because you just spent the past fifteen minutes going back and forth with their dad just absolutely roasting each other while making lunch.
There's defiantly at least one family member, like that particularly uncontainable cousin or clever auntie, who just stood there and rattled off every joke they could think of until they were like "okay I think it's all out of my system for now" and you just about cried laughing over it. That moment probably did a lot to ease König's worry about you getting along with his family.
HOWEVER. As soon as anyone else so much as snickers about it they'd automatically go into this ultra over-protective, "how dare you insult our small one" mode. The person is absolutely fucking terrified because like, they thought they were just joining in on this joke and they laughed, just a little bit, and now there's several startlingly huge people standing around them and glaring and demanding to know where they get off thinking they can insult you and they're regretting every single decision they've made today. Bonus points if König's family was sitting down when this situation started so this person doesn't really know how tall they all are until they're all fangs-bared defending you.
I think it would be so funny if like, his parents were telling a friend of theirs about you and it gets mentioned how tiny you are so this friend is expecting an abnormally short person and when they meet you they're like. this. this is an average sized human being. and König's parents are like hAhaHaha yEaH.
Also, you're going to forever be getting hand-me-downs from family members. If you're keen on mending some farm-work related holes and rips you could have an entire collection of oversized flannels.
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mawofthemagnetar · 8 months
Note
What animal in your opinion would be the hardest to put pants on in your opinion? Bonus Question: What pants would make them look the most fashionable?
you think I'm gonna say snakes. You're wrong. Snakes are easy to pant up, as long as you have a small belt and a single pant leg.
The answer is orcas, no contest. For a start: they don't have legs, and have a giant tail fin that makes putting pants on the normal way all but impossible. you'd need to add buttons to wrap it around the whale, and at that point it's not really pants anymore, is it? Plus, I think we can all agree that the front flippers are basically just arms, and you can't wear pants on your arms, that's just silly. Orcas are also MASSIVE, so you'd need a truly LUDICROUS pant leg to make it fit. Finally, Orcas are frighteningly intelligent, huge, and have massive teeth, so if at any point in getting your orca dressed the whale decided it didn't want to be clothed anymore, you're getting tailslapped into low earth orbit.
As for the kind of pants, I think you're pretty much up a creek either way, so just go for jeans! I think an orca in jeans would be stylin'.
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