sheviolentlyher

[sheviolentlyher]

a place of power within you

˖ ִֶָ་࣪˖ ִֶָ་࣪ °˖ ִֶָ*·.｡.° ·｡.·*˖ ִֶָ་· ࣪˖ ִֶָ་༘･࿐

[sheviolentlyher]

[sheviolentlyher]

i am so tired of feeling like a house bitch.

i am so tired of being a house bitch.

i want a house bitch of my own.

but i am the only house bitch.

ask a man what kind of qualities he wants in a women and he would describe a slave.

i am becoming my mother, my grandmother, probably my great grandmother, and the ones before them— unappreciated tools we have become.

if i go out and make a name for myself it would be out of spite, not spirit, and that’s why i remain a submissive house bitch. nothing good is ever manifested out of masculine energy in a woman.

humbled by calling it a privilege.

-x

#fucking mood #at least the sun is out #housewife psychosis #girl interrupted #diary #tumblr diary #diaryposting #personal diary #poetic #writeblr #writing #writers and poets #poetry #poetry blog

[sheviolentlyher]

i desire nothing.

-x

[sheviolentlyher]

i think i just want to go somewhere other than here and read a book, drink a soda.

-x

#diary

[sheviolentlyher]

Toshio Saeki

#art #forever mood #girl interrupted

[sheviolentlyher]

rising on tuesday, fuck, I have the dentist tomorrow.

hello,

woke up to a rush of old feelings trying to wreck me, but I remembered that I am not in pursuit of my sadness, but in pursuit of truth, beauty and love. there is no sadness, there is nothing haunting me, just motivating me to stay where I am, because I am right where I need to be.

I have not had a lot of experience with men, just fantasies. I have not let my soul open to the sun, so I will do that today, leave it open to everything I know but don't realize. I remain grateful for what I have experienced not bitter.

I still feel a bit vulnerable but I am not afraid. I am tired of trying to fix the kinks of the world, it is impossible, but impressionable. I am still thinking nothing matters, but everything matters. it just depends on how zoomed in or out you are. I like to always think my perspective is unique, I like to think everyone's perspective is unique. there lays golden goose eggs in all, and it's up to you to know when it is rotten.

The place I left is now a barren desert, a wasteland full of nothing but atomic air. maybe I am not jaded, but maybe I am seeker of the truth, which seems to be impossible in a world built on lies, participating in someone else's dream world, led by science, law, invention and gravity.

anyways, no more babble bullshit. I am ready to spend another day with myself, I am ready to hear myself think. I am ready to activate the core. I no longer shove information into my brain, it is tasted and well chewed before swallowed, and I don't know if that is a defense mechanism or an offense mechanism. No one ever wants to talk about the offense, people are always ready to fight but not forge. lots of talk no walk.

everyone keeps waiting for a fiery apocalypse, but its been here since 2004, in the form of a computer chip and sugared candy. ah here I go again. I know it seems soooo bad attitude of me, but see this is exactly what I am talking about when I say people are definitely asleep. They want you to be driven by your fantasies, you know, the ones we have about humanity and god, your fantasies are bad, theirs are good, because you know, theirs made it into the books, into the teachings, into the veins of this fucking place. now its to far gone and the collateral damage is unrepairable. So we have no choice but to move forward, loosing pieces as we creep the battle grounds, which looks very much like walking into a grocery store. we all are silently at battle, but me? ----

I AM AT WAR.

do not let them use your fantasies against you, --- you want fiery apocalypse, and they shake their heads up and down sayin "yesssssss, that's exactly what it looks like" so they can keep fucking killing us slowly by a means that you have never even dreamed of.

swear to god, the more time spend just observing, the more I am rewarded, no need to actively be good to receive reward, THE REWARD IS BEING ABLE TO BE THE OBSERVER IN A WORLD THAT IS BLIND. anything else after that, well, consider yourself lucky, consider yourself a messenger, it is up to you to construct a mosaic view of the world, and help other people through truth, beauty and love. it is our duty as fellow earth walkers.

I do not see another planet as lit as earth right now. It's fucking trending. I have never been this fucking ready before.

-x

#its tuesday #okay yeah #todays mood #forever mood #girl interrupted #morning thoughts #random thoughts #diary #tumblr diary #diaryposting #personal diary #poetic #writeblr #writing #writers and poets #poetry #poetry blog #spilled thoughts #thoughts #thinking #life #feelings #existence #expectations #girl rant #rant post #personal rant #free writing #free write

[sheviolentlyher]

if you only knew.

-x

#diary #girl interrupted

[sheviolentlyher]

monday night

the sounds of night have officially begun, making me feel like I am somewhere deep inside nothing. yes there is a huge void inside of me, were I am relaxed and probably slowly dying.

i don’t know what this feeling is- i keep getting the word violation. my space feels violated, so i take away everything that can see it, there peeping Tom eyes — into my life.

how do i want to present myself to the world? how do i want to present my life to the world. WHY do i need/want to present my life to the world? and i don’t ask these because i want to “please” the world, but i would like to be ,at the very least, aesthetically pleasing. i want it to be an uncorrupted ideology. i want no inspiration but my own. i am trying to strip the layers and once i think i get down to the bud, I suddenly blossom with each new experience— the layers are never ending.

i have been thinking about words. and what they mean. i have been resonating with the word flaccid. which is a perfect word to describe the general sense of words. they hold no validity unless they are backed with action, motion, or manifestation— otherwise they are flaccid and manipulated.

pay close attention what words they are using- and what the words mean to you- is it manifestion or manipulation? Yes, propaganda is everywhere, there are too many words that mean too many different things, which I didn’t know was even fucking possible, or why they ever made that possible.

no I may not use my words all the time because I know that I cannot back it with action, I will wait until I can properly support my words into manifestation. I like yo think that you can also manipulate and lie to yourself if you are not willing to take action, or let alone accountability for your thoughts and words.

i just a girl, living in twenty first century America, please someone needs to write a book about the mundane undertones of living, and how the only thing that saves us is our fantasies, superficial talk and sentimental delusions.

fin.

-x

#diary #monday mood #forever mood #deep writing #this is deep #flash thoughts #late night thoughts #thoughts in my head #girl interrupted #tumblr diary #diaryposting #personal diary #poetic #writeblr #writing #writers and poets #poetry #poetry blog #thoughts into the void #fucking mood #raw thoughts #sheviolentlyher #deep thoughts #girlblogging #this is a girlblog #earth angel

[sheviolentlyher]

Frankie and Johnny (1991)

Michelle Pfeiffer and Al Pacino

#forever mood #90s aesthetic #90s movies #90s nostalgia #90s #diary #tumblr diary #diaryposting #personal diary

[sheviolentlyher]

hi.

monday- can’t believe we are here again so quickly, you almost can’t get lost in the weekend sauce because by the time monday comes you aren’t ready- swear we need more than forty eight fucking hours to rest.

anyways don’t want to start on a bad note 🎵— tuning into the world as my body wakes

feeling secure in my feminine, with my masculine energy always surrounding me, a bubble 🫧

this is something that i am used to- regulating which energy takes over.

no sun- more rain but things are greener than ever, flowers are blooming and I can’t help but think about how much the earth has been rehydrated- I will take the gray sky and warm air with grace.

it’s a wonderful day to have a wonderful day.

-x

#grand rising #monday mood #let’s get it #diary #hyper feminine #tumblr diary #diaryposting #personal diary #poetic #writeblr #writing #writers and poets #poetry #poetry blog

[sheviolentlyher]

ascension.

I can’t believe how extremely interpersonal this book is. — if you have been reading my blog, then you would know what book- I feel like I have the golden ticket right now.

he has become a piece of mosaic are in my many pieces of building an image of the world.

he falls under truth, beauty and love- no matter - take your feels away- look at him as a person, a person who keenly observed humanity and the way we are abused by a system who knows nothing when it comes time to apply it to the masses— to reality.

most importantly- he has taught me HOW to read. — this I cannot explain- or better yet he as validated the way I read is the correct way— not reading to KNOW- but reading to add to the mosaic mental picture of one’s world.

i don’t read this to berate people with useless information, everything i read is for personal gain to this mental mosaic depiction of the world I live in.

finally someone eccentric enough to understand the concept of applying what you read to how you approach everything. i find others to be superficial unless they can prove otherwise— the way they communicate knowledge is key. are they using it to defend themselves or are they using it to give you perspective?

this man is full of it. a perspective that maybe the majority of masses couldn’t comprehend.

i lay my head down to sleep violently informed.

-x

#goodnight my love #flash thoughts #idle chatter #idle thoughts #i am the muse #diary #tumblr diary #diaryposting #personal diary #poetic #writeblr #writing #writers and poets #poetry #poetry blog

[sheviolentlyher]

Sunday

clear mind and stable heart.

violently happy.

-x

#violently happy #fuck yes #self concept #diary #tumblr diary #diaryposting #personal diary #poetic #writeblr #writing #writers and poets #poetry #poetry blog

[sheviolentlyher]

the realest thing i have read all day.

#okay mood #fuck yes #facts #words of wisdom #girl interrupted #diary #tumblr diary #diaryposting #personal diary #poetic #writeblr #writing #writers and poets #poetry #poetry blog

[sheviolentlyher]

hi.

i am feeling good, don’t know if i will manically crash but i don’t believe in such a thing, i always say when we are struggling we need cleansing- so by crashing i mean cleansing— and by cleansing i mean randomly crying while brushing my teeth.

yes, sure, sometimes it aches some , but it is so great when it doesn’t.

i can’t wait to lay in my bed with a sitcom playing in the background reading about the interpersonal struggles of Hitler.

suit yourself. i still love you.

-x

#Sunday mood #forever mood #random thoughts #idle thoughts #idle chatter #diary #tumblr diary #diaryposting #personal diary #poetic #writeblr #writing #writers and poets #poetry #poetry blog

[sheviolentlyher]

i am both enlightened and feral.

-x

#forever mood #fucking mood #girl interrupted #diary #tumblr diary #diaryposting #personal diary #poetic #writeblr #writing #writers and poets #poetry #poetry blog

[sheviolentlyher]

i feel like black magic today.

i feel like i am radiating dominance.

i wear my sunglasses inside like I’m fucking cyclops. i cannot make eye contact with anyone, the eye is the window to the soul - I don’t play- plus I can’t see. but I don’t care- it’s just what I do- and I have never thought twice about it- hopefully they think I’m blind. every time I take off my glasses I blush at the look on their face. both man and woman. i had no time for that today.

I don’t have any time for anything that doesn’t cultivate me, by shielding my eyes I believe that it’s make me unable to mimic human behavior and just BE ME. know what I’m saying? probably not.

what the fuck is so hard about being around a lot of people you don’t know? what is so comforting about being around a lot of people you don’t know? Is it the common denominator? energy? connection? movement? life?

And why the fuck do I think about it so much?

and I keep laughing like i am the coolest bitch living and that helps.

-x

#sunday #flash thoughts #i don’t care anymore #exsistence #human behaviour #diary #forever mood #tumblr diary #diaryposting #personal diary #poetic #writeblr #writing #writers and poets #poetry #poetry blog #girl interrupted #thoughts into the void #fucking mood #deep writing #raw thoughts #sheviolentlyher #deep thoughts #girlblogging