#yeah I’m not doing ok lol…

[mxliv-oftheendless]

\m/

#i keep feeling this crippling anxiety that I am not going to pass this semester #i think it’s because I now have a job off campus that’s eating up time that in the past I’ve been able to use to do more work #because yeah I’ve always gotten worried about failing before… but now #now it feels even worse #i have three big papers to write #one of which is what me graduating with honors hinges on #several smaller assignments that I keep struggling to keep track of #club President things to do #and history club is a whole other thing because I keep worrying that I’m a terrible club president #yeah I’m not doing ok lol… #the worst thing though is that everyone I talk to keeps telling me I’ll be fine #because I’ve always worried about passing semesters and always did pass #so people say that because I’m smart and I’ve passed before that I’ll be okay #and at this point I wanna fucking scream because NO NO I DO NOT FEEL LIKE I’M DOING FINE #that only makes it worse because now on top of everything else I’m scared I won’t live up to everyone’s expectations #there have been moments this semester where I’ve seriously felt like I’m going insane #i fucking hate this #i hate being scared I hate being anxious #i just want everything to be over #because the end of the semester is in a month and a few weeks and the pressure keeps feeling increasingly worse #i had a meltdown during work last week like an actual ugly crying meltdown #fuck this fuck it all to hell #i wanna be done #ignore this please I don’t want advice and I don’t want to be told I’ll be okay I just need to vent #random thoughts are random

[pepperpixel]

Some inside job art! Mostly just trying to figure out how to draw these two

#inside job #brett hand #reagan ridley #doodles #these aren’t rlly anything special yet just me figuring out there designs but! there will be more…. I promise hhgh #I need to figure out how to draw Brett doing diff expressions ghgh. cuz so far I can only confidently draw him w his mouth gaping open #his mouth is so interesting tho! I love. how they draw it in the show. it’s cute. it’s one of his many cute qualities. #this is a man constructed out of mostly just cute qualities honestly ghgh #but so yeah! I wanna figure out. how to properly and confidently draw. him making diff expressions #cuz! even if usually smilingly vacantly is his default expression. he still has others! and. I wanna be able to depict them ghghg #I’m talking a lot about Brett here but I fucking love Reagan too.. she’s fucking… uGHG #WE LOVE TSUNDERES IN THIS HOUSE!!! #I kinda relate to both Brett and Reagan lol. but to be fair they both have a lot of issues so I guess it makes sense #like. me looking at Brett’s desperate need for approval: omg… he’s just like me fr fr #ghGH OK ANYWAY #yeah. have some inside job art #hopefully there will be more soon! #I fucked up one of the tags in there but I don’t feel like fixing it lol. it’s the one about ‘smiling vacantly’ #just pretend it’s not fucked up ghgh

[weizhiyuan]

I did something silly….. I made QL guess who!

About a year and a half ago I had the idea for a custom ql guess who game but I had no one to play it with so I just put it to the side until I (hopefully) would. Fortunately that day came this weekend when @pondphuwin and I got to play a few rounds (they beat me 4:5 actually lmao)!

Some of the questions we asked were stuff like “is it from gmmtv,” “does your show have a branded pair,” “is there a love triangle,” “is there a debate over whether your show is a bl or not,” and more personal ones like “am I crazy over one of the main actors,” “do we have beef with the way this bl went,” “did we watch this live together,” and so on. Rlly fun stuff!

Since this is a custom guess who I had to make all the pieces manually. At first it seems fine and easy bc there’s already official posters right? But the difficulty is that almost every poster is a different size. So I figured out how to get the proper guess who face piece measurements and manually resized each poster to fit, with a slight gradient in the background where the remaining space isn’t covered by the poster. You can see those gradient bars on the top and bottom in the closeup of the last twilight piece, for example. Also it’s just really funny to hold mini posters of qls lmao (using my hand as a reference)

There’s 190 ql poster pieces in total (based on approx. how many I’d seen as of the time of printing) (yes I will add more as time goes on) and they were all put on one big google doc that covered about 10 pages and looked like this!

After I had them all set I printed them out on cardstock so they were thicker & more sturdy and then I did a lot of cutting. And since both players need the same posters I had to cut it all twice

Are there easier ways to do this? Maybe. I’m not sure. Honestly I just did whatever like this is my own gay little art project lol

Once I had them all cut and held them in my hand I felt quite proud of my work and now that I’ve actually played it I really do

Here’s just like a pic I took when we were playing a round. Since there were so many, after every round we took out the two qls we just selected and replaced them with new ones and we never ran out lmao. It took quite a bit of effort but it was totally worth it hehe

#next time I wanna do it with actors hehe #might get working on that later #but yeah this is so silly and fun and idk fellow ql watchers u might appreciate skdjdjd #it was fun to choose which posters to use too #the only thing I didn’t have time for was the bigger face cards & designing the backs but I will do those too later lol #b.txt #idk what to tag this as #I’m just gonna tag some of the qls u can see in the photos ig lol #it’s relevant….. #last twilight #bad buddy #utsukushii kare #bed friend #pit babe #me when I had two shows open left and one of them was pit babe: does ur show have omegaverse… KDJSJDJ #cooking crush #until we meet again #ok I rlly don’t kno what 2 tag this as so I’ll leave it here lol

[blaithnne]

The first Heron design I showed off was from before Confidential Casefiles, so I thought I’d show you guys her look after she gets her new arm. Plus a few changes I made to her character for this AU! Just realised the way I placed my signature makes it look like I’M her worst enemy, whoops.

Meet the Cast!

╰┈➤ Canon ☄. *. ⋆

→ Scrooge McDuff → Matilda McDuff → Hortense McDuff → Goldie O'Gilt → Jack Duckworth → Bentina Beakley → LÙ Huifen (pre-caseflies)

╰┈➤ OCs ☄. *. ⋆

→ Lucrais NicRiada

#fuck you *turns your turtleneck into a cheongsam* #hope im spelling that right lol #this look is still from the 60s era btw!! #I’d make some slight changes for her modern day look UNLIKE CANON #don’t know what I’d change tho cause I really like this design #also may and june don’t exist in this au sorry lol #gonna replace their storyline with some original stuff if I ever do present day art for this au! #I might repurpose them for something else #maybe they can be daisies nieces #but yeah canon heron is a fucking child abuser and I think that’s where beakley would draw the line and I’m a beakheron shipper till death #sooooooo that’s not happening a #lso. I hate s3 BUT IM NOT GONNA START RANTING ABT THAT NOW I SWEAR ANYWAYS HUIFEN SUPREMACY OK BYE #art #my art #digital art #fanart #doodle #drawing #ducktales #ducktales human au #<- I need a better/more unique name for this au hmm #black heron #LÙ Huifen #hope I got the stràc the right way round #I forget the English word #humanisation #gjinka #also if this were a cartoon set in the present day. I think Huifen would be introduced as Beakleys worst enemy with a vendetta against her #and beakley is convinced it’s bc she fucking blew up her arm bc duh #until it’s revealed heron is just mad that beakley retired bc I THOUGHT WE HAD SOMETHING SPECIAL. I THOUGHT WE WERE ARCH RIVALS

[toothpaste-for-the-skin]

World’s WORST Comp Player Throws the THIRD Scrim in a ROW! And more at 8!

#ok well not really but I have been slacking with my personal practice lately #I’ve been trying to revive my tumblr so I’m not really on that grind yk #also yeah I do actually quote this tumblr post word for word after playing poorly #splatoon oc #Splatoon #splatoon3 #salmonid #smallfry #shitpost lol #i actually drew this at 5am and then forgot about it #also Hoover stole her phone here #also the couch is just a picture from a sales website lol #my art

[1driedpersimmon]

This is getting wildly out of character… but I loveeeee how dramatic the musical is it’s so funny

#death note #L #light #yeah so if it wasn’t obvious I’m obsessed with the musical LOL #what I’d do to have it in the states…. #also #gun #it’s death note there’s lethal weapons #also they didn’t have mics but pretend- #…surprisingly drawing L is super easy and Light is… hard to draw 😭😭😭 #oh also person that told me to watch the drama I started it and it’s very fun :) #light yagami #l lawiet #... ok so when did we find out Ls REAL NAME?????? #HUHH??? I ONLY KNOW IT THROUGH YALL????

[strawberri-draws]

Uhhh something something I watched The Menu on a 8 hour flight and drew this whilst severely sleep deprived

(No text version) (because I’m like 80% sure I got the quote wrong) (but I was sleepy sorry)

#my art #fanart #strawberridraws #the menu #the menu fanart #I forgor the actresses name lol #but she slayed fr fr #anyways the flight was hell tbh #was stuck in between my mom (whom I love dearly) #and this ANNOYING ASS DUDE #he was fuckin. manspreading INTO MY SEAT the whole. time. #his foot was in my space #and he was super muscly and took the arm rest and elbowed me too #also he spent like. 30 minutes silently doing.. kareoke??? #like. ok #anyways #I thoroughly enjoyed this film even if I desperately need sleep #I’m doing an internship abroad now tho so that’s fun #trying not to use data so I prob won’t be online as much #yeah. the menu slapped

[goldensunset]

surprise art attack!!! here’s @deityofhearts ‘s cashmere, everyone’s favorite whimsical tiefling

#pose taken directly from the kikuomiku4 album cover bc i’ve been listening to UFO on repeat for idk how many days now #finally gave me the inspiration i needed to do something like this it’s like both sad and super whimsical #actually tbh it gives me more wishful vibes now that i think about it but 1. idk what wishful looks like and 2. cashmere design my beloved #kikuo just in general has a lot of whimsysad and/or fundark which is why i love him #tbh ufo has quickly shot up to one of my fave songs it’s the iconic accordion and the tempo being unstable in places #uh anyway ignore me being a kikuo nerd again #wahhh this was fun to work on it has consumed me these past three days #jumping up and down hehehehehe #glad i finally cut to the ‘it’s done *collapses*’ stage of the arting process bc i’ve been having trouble finishing pieces lately #man i WISH i could come up with poses this good on my own. idc i’m still proud of this #my art #ok yeah i just got the time total. 12 hours #i knew it would be a long time but i didn’t think that long #tbh a lot of that was spent inefficiently bc i kept having to resize the image up when i realized the pixels were too crunchy #and when you make an image bigger the lines get blurry so then you have to redo them. yeah i had to do that TWICE. like a dummy. #12 hours used to be like par for the course for me but i’ve finally gotten faster. or maybe i’ve just stopped doing as many full figures #lol

[elmleif]

Not only is this pregnancy a big shock to both Saoirse and Cillian because of their previous struggles with fertility and conceiving, but also because they learned today that they’re expecting twins!

#and before you ask YEAH I already did their makeovers in EVERY AGE bc I’m EXCITED and wanted to SEE THEM OK #AND THEY’RE BEAUTIFUL and i want to share them SO BAD but also like that’s not ok to do with a legacy lol #postcard legacy challenge #postcard legacy #generation 1: the farmer #saoirse murphy #cillian hammond #ts4 #ts4 screenshots #ts4 legacy #ts4 gameplay #simblr #simmer

[poppyseed799]

btw I don’t know if this is a thing anyone is thinking about but I’m not gonna stop drawing Jimmy as a canary. It’s a lovely bird. It’s still something that’s been really important to his series. There’s no reason to drop the canary headcanon just cuz Lizzie fell into the void.

#warning: don’t open up these tags I went on a very heated and rather unrelated rant cuz I’ve been mad #trafficblr #life series #secret life spoilers #secret life smp #jimmy solidarity #also I’m sick of seeing ppl celebrate Jimmy surviving because they hate the canary curse fans like SHUT UP!!! LET US HAVE FUN GOD!!! #LIKE LITERALLY EVEN IF NOBODY CAME UP WITH THE CANARY METAPHOR WE WOULD STILL BE TALKING ABOUT HOW HES ALWAYS DYING OK WE DIDNT MAKE UP THAT #HE DIES FIRST HE JUST DOES. GOD. so what if some people make shakespeare sounding posts about the curse that I don’t understand. we are JUST #having fun and making connections where we don’t need to BECAUSE ITS FUN. NOT CUZ WE DONT CARE ABOUT ANYTHING ELSE. sorry for the past few #days I’ve been genuinely mad at this fandom’s growing hatred towards its own community. #LIKE IM FINE IF ITS NOT YOUR THING BUT GOD. WE ARENT EVEN DOING ANYTHING 😭😭😭 THE LORE LITERALLY WRITES ITSELF OR IS WRITTEN BY MARTYN LOL #I’ve just been getting SO TILTED man. like ohhh yeah okay ur right i said too much guess I won’t say anything anymore #does anyone else genuinely not know wtf ppl are talking about when they say a certain hc takes over everything about the character #cuz I literally see so much varied Jimmy content yet I’ve seen several ppl complain that ppl ignore aspects of his character in favor of #WHATEVER when I literally don’t see that happening to him. step out of ur circle or something I don’t even HAVE a circle man

[daydadahlias]

not to sound mentally ill at 1:30 am on a Sunday night but. when I find leftovers that past!me put in the fridge bc she meal prepped for the week, or when I find sticky notes with reminders on them to brush my teeth or shower that I wrote for myself knowing I might be awake until 1 am again and forget, or when I see that a past version of me has already done an assignment last week so I don’t have to do it tonight,, I just want to say thanks to her for taking care of me.

#it’s probably just bc I haven’t slept a lot this last week bc of all the stuff I’ve had to do #but :( #I’m like oddly emotional over past!jess like we’re not the same person #bc like :( idk :( past me bought chocolate bars a couple weeks ago knowing current me would want them #I stocked up on food so I wouldn’t be hungry #I wrote reminders so that even when I got swamped with work I wouldn’t forget to eat or bathe or take care of myself #and I know that seems stupid to notice and like it should just be Inherent for a person lol #but !! freshman me didn’t do this !! freshman/sophomore me was all outta whack #and so :( idk #I’m usually so sleep deprived and chaotic that I forget I’ve even done things for myself until I see them #and sometimes I am consciously like ‘future Jess will really appreciate this’ #like last night !! I did an assignment that’s not even due until the 29TH!!!!!!! #bc I had the motivation and I knew future Jess would be happy #and when it comes to the 29TH and I don’t have to worry about it I WILL be so happy!!!!!!! #I love people :( #I love what we do for ourselves #I love me #so yeah :) #that’s my bit for the night ok byeee

[ssreeder]

I'm so looking forward to iroh and zuko properly talking and seeing irohs reaction to zuko being gay.

Like we all know he doesn't agree with the fire nation rn but how will he react?

Will he not support him cause sokkas a guy? Will he not support him because it's SOKKA? Will he accept him? Will he reveal he's known for years zuko was gay?

Especially with everything that happened with zhao, regarding to what jee said to bato on their date. (Which is a very understandable perspective, zuko just got out of this very sexually traumatising situation and almost immediately starts a relationship (his first relationship) with sokka, but then again it is a very unique situation)

One thing I love about some atla fics is how they portray the FNs thoughts on queerness, cause on one hand they were one of the only country's (I think) that treated men and women the same but then again it's also the fucking fire nation.

And I also think zukos whole canon arc can be very comparative to queerness,

His dads an asshole and after speaking out against him he throws him out, and zuko try's for 3 years to regain his father's love and acceptance, and then faced with the opportunity of regaining it takes it immediately regardless of who or what he may hurt (iroh, his own morals etc) but once he makes it back home realises how fucked up everything is and eventually confronts his dad and openly tells him he doesn't agree with him then runs aways.

I also wonder if iroh secretly knows jee is queer it doesn't seem that likely to me but it also is iroh so who knows.

<3

I do think Iroh’s reaction will be a big moment for not only the story but for Zuko’s character development. Right now, Zuko’s technically still a prisoner, holding himself there by assuming Iroh will not understand or judge him when in reality he’ll never know what his uncle is thinking until they TALK ABOUT IT. (Which the FN royal family is just sooo good at healthy communication I don’t understand why this is so hard for them lol?!)

I do agree that the suddenness of the relationship combined with the intensity from both zuko and Sokka is very alarming for people looking at it from the outside (I mean we all totally get it cause we were there but others are like uhhhh hmmmm ok this might be concerning) so I get them gossiping and wondering if this is truly real or what the fucks going on with those boys.

I love Zukos canon arc because there’s just so much about zukos story that can be relatable no matter who you are and I think that’s why he is a fan favorite (it doesn’t explain why we torture him the way we do but ehhhh it’s fine haha)

Hmmmmmm does iroh know Jees gay? Depends on how saucy those music nights got ;)

#HAHAHA DO SEE THE JEEROH JOKE SOCKS?!?! I hope you see it through all your House reblogging nonsense haha #Jk you obsess over your new blorbos I support you! #I love this ask thank you #I also love that canon gave us so much to work with but left it loose enough we could do what we wanted #like I’ve read the fire nation written so many different ways in fics it’s insane #And I love all the unique thoughts! #I will continue to flesh out the FN little by little as we progress #An azula pov (or someone from her squad) will be part of every new chapter until the end #She’s a coming haha #I don’t know if iroh knows Jee is gay #Or that jee is like one date away from hooking up with bato haha #Or that zuko is already kind of hooking up with sokka (not really but I mean they’re getting prettttttttty snuggly haha) #But yeah idk I’m excited this next chapter it is A LOT #& we will be SUPER CLOSE to getting some answers to your questions lol #Thanks for this cool ask these are my favorite asks #Sorry if you’ve sent me an ask lately and I haven’t responded I’m getting better at that I promise #I will say though that I don’t respond to asks if I genuinely don’t know what to say or if I feel I might come off too mean or rude. #So yeah sorry anyone who’s ask I didn’t respond #(I also forget them in drafts and then feel weird about posting it after it’s been a month so I’m sorrrryyyyyy…) #Ok phew this was a lot of tags sorry #monsieugrgraves #Leaving it all behind #LIAB #ITF #ask

[pepperpixel]

More powerpunk girls art!!!! Cuz they are just. Fun to draw ghgh- this time trying to get a better design for brat! Cuz even tho I liked the old one I had.. I wanted to try and give her a lil bit more edge… so! Here were some experiments w that! I didn’t succeed in. Solidifying anything, as u can probably notice. Considering her outfit is slightly different in every picture ghgh- but! Idk! Maybe that’s ok lol. She’s the sorta character who would have a bunch of different outfits it’s fine lol

#powerpuff girls #the powerpuff girls #ppg #powerpunk girls #ppnkg #ppg brat #ppg brute #ppg berserk #doodles #also featuring! I think the first picture I’ve drawn of brute smiling lol! #anyway yeah… been workin on these all day my brains mush… have some powerpunks I hope u enjoy them ghgh- #actually. more thoughts rlly quick. #why I wanted to give brat a lil more edge: there called the power PUNK girls… and I felt like brat was having a severe punk deficiency ghg #like. I don’t think she needs to actually BE punk. but just… needed a lil more edge.. a lil more a teensy bit #i am also thinking about this in regards to berserk. which is why I gave her lil fishnet gloves here lol. but idk! #I have some ideas for her but… I do like the design I already have for her too.. so idk. I’m thinking about it tho #ok now I’m done w thoughts lol

[fantomette22]

Also kind of funny how people say i’m quite discreet and don’t talk a lot when i’m afraid i talk too much (maybe too loud or too fast) and afraid i ended up annoyed them. (Can smn explain pls xD)

anyway it’s late i apologize if it doesn’t make so much sense it is late)

#i mean i know teachers have been tellign for years i don’t participate enough in class. sorry i just have nothing to say or don’t want too #also my pseudo/ nickname is literally fantomette aka ghost/ fantôme (feminine nickname) because i’m silencious #and people don’t know where i am (in my own house!) and now apparently i spawn next to people xD #yeah had a nice evening where i talked more with nice acquaintances at schools! and yeah i wonder… #is it a neurodivergent moment 😅 #when i’m passion about smt i talk. A LOT. maybe too much. i always reflect how i say dumb things or perhaps ´cut’ too much people #and that i should just shut it and listen #cut = too much intervention/ adding stuff? #so yeah nice suprised i supposed. but yeah if i don’t directly talk to smn or have nothing to say well i listen/ go on my phone/ daydream #i already talk to myself a lot. not ok to do that in public lol #so yeah interesting 🤔 if smn know smt about well that subject could be cool #didn’t have anyone really close so i hang myself to group. but that’s cool re having friends time like earlier today with other cool people #autism adhd ? infj or just well me being me who knows i still don’t know

[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

idk why this bugs me a bit but I really don’t like when you see art or writing that delves into the dynamic between characters in a less positive way - like an argument, or clashes between coping mechanisms, or a miscommunication that causes some problems and doesn’t get immediately resolved - and you get people saying stuff like “oh they’re so fucked up” or “this would not be healthy irl but here it’s cute” and I just. what do you think a healthy relationship looks like. it’s never going to be perfect. people disagree. not everything gets resolved perfectly. sometimes there will be parts of a person you will never completely understand no matter how close you are to them. what matters is communicating in the ways that you can (which isn’t always in the way help books or therapists tell you to btw! there are lots of ways to communicate effectively that are specific to who you are as people), making active efforts to show your care (which yes, sometimes isn’t easy. that’s why it’s an effort), and enjoying this person’s company (they should make you feel good to be around overall! clashing a little is okay but they should not make you miserable!)

anyways I guess it also irritates me because I see these kinds of comments a lot under studies having to do with characters struggling with trauma or mental illness and therefore not communicating in necessarily healthy or productive ways and maybe always having issues that do not get resolved perfectly and I really can’t stand it. we already live in a world where people have to pretend to be fine all the time. I’m quite flattered when people are comfortable enough with me to let that veneer go. they feel safe around me! what a compliment! I always feel like that’s so much more than I deserve. sure things can be uncomfortable at times and I do sometimes have to say “I can’t listen or help right now but please tell me later” and that’s ok! because we all want to make sure we’re safe for each other to come talk to. to be honest with. a little personal discomfort at times is worth it. always.

people are messy. you’ve got to let people be messy. friendships, relationships, etc, they take time and effort from everyone involved. learning to manage less than ideal situations actually is going to help you draw better boundaries against things that are actually “fucked up” or toxic than expecting perfection, or for a happily ever after where all the conflicts you started out with get resolved.

idk. it’s just. people you care about deserve to not have to be ideal around you. likewise you deserve to have to not be ideal around them. isn’t that. the whole point of someone knowing your soul? the ugliness? and the way it’s a package deal with the rest of you? I would like to learn you. I don’t just want your scraps. I want every part of the whole I asked for. I will learn to manage the sharper edges.

#ugh ok so there’s a lot of nuance I couldn’t cover here this is more of a mini rant but yeah. #some of you do not know what ‘fucked up’ actually looks like I think… #fucked up dynamics are fun to play with! but a functional relationship that happens to have some issues is not it! #especially when the issues have to do with past trauma or mental health issues. kind of gross man. #I guess it extra confused me too because like. I’ve never found it to be overly stressful or a big issue to accommodate people? #I don’t find it overly taxing. At least not anymore than socializing in general #in fact I like it better because now I have a goal to focus on in the interaction - make person feel comforted/better/supported/safe #most interactions I feel like I’m flailing lol #agh anyways. bye #storyrambles

[tomatoluvr69]

Sitting down to floss and brush my teeth has been lifechanging. On a completely unrelated note how the fuck am I supposed to have this skeleton for several more decades. It’s all over for me lads 😔

#knees hurt. hips hurt. back hurts. wrists hurt. swag #it’s not this bad most of the time but by the end of the day it’s like auuuugh #it really is too bad that I’ve got extreme doctor fears because of the IssuesTM! #and oh yeah I don’t have health insurance LOL… #which I am using as a convenient excuse to avoid going to the doctors LOL #i have some doctor ~traumas~ I think LOL! #im working up to it. it’s glacial. sometime this year maybe? #I went twice as an adult and both times were for health forms for college enrollment #I’ve been to the ER and an urgent care once or twice though so clearly I’m FINE… #this is BAD do not be like me #but it’s only become clear to me in the past year or two that the incidents in my childhood reeeeally affected me #and to have US healthcare be such a profoundly difficult and punitive process basically means I am just never going to like jump through #those hoops only to be confronted with a severe phobia lol #im not saying that’s a reasonable train of thought but it’s more that that’s my subconscious reasoning #but it is a 2024 goal to get seen by a doctor #but the other thing is that it’s so fucking clear to me that they will do NOTHING for either PMDD or my joint pain which are my chief #complaints at the moment #but like i should probably be like getting routine panels and Pap smears :-( #everything’s SO EXPENSIVE… #They’ll be like give me your blood. ok all normal everything is healthy. ok that’ll be literally $200 #:-( #ugh I’m upsetting myself just thinking about doctors. ok Goodnight #(with full intention to keep scrolling)