#why do i bother with anything at all

[betasuppe]

When even the few & far between comments on your fics don't do anything & you can't help but feel like every kind compliment is just another lie to pacify you for some reason.

#hey do you know that um #im useless & lack any & all akills #& i want to die & have no reason to live #besides imagining imaginary people in my head having better lives than me #hahaha♡ #i want to kill myself #why do i bother with anything at all #god truly wHY #lol #truly #every day i wander closer to the path of actually considering #how i will do it #♡

[fandom-geek]

i think the thing that really gets me about pre-canon durge is their absolute sense of duty, and their utter isolation outside of the cult of bhaal.

most of the cultists seem eager to see durge upon their return, and one even says they were the first to feed him flesh. gortash tells them of an exhibition of a bhaalspawn's corpse and another bhaalspawn's creations and durge immediately plans to attack the hall of wonder to recover them. they then apparently entrust said bhaalspawn's corpse to sceleritas fel to "restore" through taxidermy. they deride orin for her artistry with corpses explicitly because "bhaal will never care" and because orin "[does] not understand lord bhaal".

even their infamous prayer for forgiveness is framed around their absolute submission to bhaal's plans, and the crime that requires forgiveness? admiring his rival's chosen. that's one line, and the next three paragraphs are swearing to carry out his plan exactly as they've been told to, all for his forgiveness.

hell, even their room reinforces this. orin has barely touched the place aside from installing her mother's corpse and her manifesto - and that is some of the only decoration. what was it before orin, an empty room with skulls, a bed, a desk, some chests and a wardrobe?

the durge didn't have any semblance of a life outside of bhaal, aside from gortash. and is it any surprise? the only other hint they ever had a life outside of the cult is the flashback of kid durge murdering their adopted family, all thanks to their father's urging.

bhaal even tries to force them back into isolation after they've been tadpoled by forcing them to kill alfira, and then trying to force a durge who resists him to kill their lover. if they continue resisting, bhaal kills them. bhaal will not allow them to have a life outside of him and, if it weren't for jergal, he would've succeeded.

#bg3 spoilers #the dark urge #honestly writing this all out it's weird that bhaal doesn't try to kill your party when you're at the temple #it'd be perfectly in line with everything else he'd done to durge up until that moment #also just makes me think of how sceleritas will tell an evil durge that the worst thing they've ever done #is giving a beggar a coin without asking for anything in return #ymmv and everyone has their own headcanons but pre canon durge was not a happy or enthusiastic participant as far as canon shows #which is reinforced by gortash saying you've always been better at controlling your urges than orin! #why would durge bother to do that when 'all father wants is death in droves death in numbers'! #honestly i think it's v reasonable to think that durge could've been tempted into bane worship given what little we know of them pre canon #anyway haven't played evil durge myself so very curious abt any insights from that route #baldur's gate

[gay-jesus-probably]

Seeing as the Gerudo turned on Ganon, he might not have been that much better of a ruler.

First of all, we literally have no idea, because the only ancient Gerudo that we actually get to interact with is Ganondorf himself, and he has nothing to say about his own people. The ancient Gerudo sage doesn't count btw, she doesn't have a name, we never even see her face, and she has literally nothing to say except repeating the exact same dialogue as the sages for the other races. The narrative does not treat the ancient sages as people; they are four completely interchangable weapons that are owned by the royal family.

And secondly, I don't care how Ganon ruled them; the Gerudo only get one man every century, if their king sucks, they've obviously got their own system of government to fall back on. I have no idea what kind of authority the sages had among their own people, but honestly I'd say if the four of them were in charge of their respective people, then they were just puppet rulers appointed by Rauru, given that all four of them happily agreed that to sell their entire race into servitude the second Zelda asked them. Say what you will about Ganondorf, but I fucking know that if he was told the Gerudo people existed for the sole purpose of serving the glory of Hyrule, he'd drop kick Zelda into the fucking sun.

And don't get me started on the implications of the cultural differences we see between the independent Gerudo and the annexed Gerudo. The background Gerudo characters all have their own models, and we can clearly see that the ones siding with Ganon have their own unique looks - for example, the amazing lady with the mohawk that summons the molduga swarm in that one flashback. And men are never mentioned in these flashbacks at all, which implies that the Gerudo genuinely didn't care about settling down. Ganon even speaks derisively about marriage, implying that it's very rare for Gerudo women to make serious romantic commitments with men. It implies that their culture is more along the same line as their portrayal in OOT - they are a closed culture. Men trying to force their way into their areas are arrested, and mocked for being entitled dumbasses. Outsiders are only welcome if they can prove that they respect the Gerudo as people, and aren't just there to try and pick up chicks. It's never outright said, but OOT also makes it pretty clear that the Gerudo women just aren't interested in marrying outsiders - close relationships occur with other Gerudo, Hylian men are only considered useful for making babies.

Meanwhile the Gerudo we see serving Hyrule are all trying to measure up to Hylian beauty standards, and appeal to their men. Their one goal in life is to meet a man and get married. Men are welcome in their lands, and only kept out of the town itself... and even then, there's a small army of guys trying to force their way into the town anyways, which is brushed off as just haha, boys will be boys. No men allowed isn't even about independence, it's just a silly romantic tradition.

Of course this is just a fictional culture in a game world, but it's still really fucking uncomfortable that the 'evil' Gerudo are the ones that have independence, both politically and socially, and display a unique culture that refuses to tolerate disrespect from outsiders. Meanwhile the 'good' Gerudo are the ones that canonically exist to serve a kingdom where 95% of the population is light skinned (even setting aside the unfortunate implications, just saying one race exists to serve a different one is super fucked up), they have classes on how to be more appealing to Hylian's, and their entire social structure is built around finding a Hylian man to marry, making them all inherently dependent on the goodwill of outsiders. Even their biggest value of 'women only' is treated as a joke; men trying to trespass in BOTW are just shoved back out the door, letting them keep trying all day if they want. The crowds of men plotting to force their way in are laughed off as a joke. Nobody cares that there's a guy running laps around their city walls and trying to trick women into being alone with him. I mean for fucks sake, in TOTK we find that the creepy guy trying to lure women away has taken advantage of a massive disaster to get into the town, and he's still there once things return to normal. You can't kick him out, or alert anyone to his presence. And the Gerudo just tolerate Hylians blatantly ignoring their boundaries. For fucks sake, TOTK even reveals that the seven legendary heroines they've been revering the whole time were actually completely useless and unable to achieve anything... because they needed the eighth hero, a Hylian man to teach them basic tactics and do all the heavy lifting.

TOTK does not respect the Gerudo people in the slightest. It doesn't respect anyone who isn't Hylian or Zonai.

...This got a little off track, but the point I'm trying to make is, no, I don't consider the Gerudo turning on Ganon to mean anything. The entire game does not feel like the real story of what happened, it feels like the propaganda version of history meant to make Hyrule look as good as possible. I genuinely cannot believe that we're being told the real story about the Imprisoning War, because none of it feels real, and we don't get to know any details that might have made Hyrule look even slightly imperfect. We're told that Ganondorf is evil because he hates Hyrule, and he hates Hyrule because he's evil. The Gerudo people followed Ganondorf and saw him as a hero of their people, then suddenly he was their worst enemy. Hyrule is a perfect kingdom that has strong, equal alliances with the other races, but also all of the non-Hylian races exist for the sole purpose of serving Hyrule, and their leaders are expected to swear eternal loyalty and submission to the Hylian royal family. King Rauru and Queen Sonia united all of the races in peace and equality, which is why they're sitting on the world's supply of magical nuclear missiles, and every member of the Hylian royal family is allowed to walk around wearing them as cute accessories, but everyone else only gets them at the last second, and they all need to outright swear to only use that power to benefit Rauru and his descendants.

There's just so many fucked up contradictions, and so many hints of something more nuanced going on... but the story refuses to acknowledge any of it, and just keeps aggressively pushing the narrative that Hyrule is the ultimate good and couldn't possibly do anything wrong. I don't even believe that Ganon was a bad king honestly; we never hear why his people stopped following him. We also never even see if the Gerudo people turned on him at all; all we know is the ancient Gerudo sage wanted him dead, and given that she also happily sold her people into slavery, she's not exactly the most trustworthy source of information. All we know is that Ganondorf was a hero to his people, only one of his citizens is ever shown having an issue with him (and her motives are never explained), and then he lost the war and was sealed away, leaving his people open to be conquered by Zelda and annexed into Hyrule. By the time we see any Gerudo actually opposing Ganon (apart from the ancient sage), it's been ten thousand years since the war, and all anyone knows is the Hylian version of the story.

#tears of the kingdom spoilers #tears of the kingdom #ganondorf #the secret bonus reason for me arguing about this so much is that it's interesting #on a surface reading TOTK is a really boring story. nothing changes nobody learns anything there's no nuance #the game explains the entire story to us in the opening cutscene. idk why they bothered with the rest of the game #you could walk down those stairs in the intro and kill ganon immediately and it'd be pretty much the exact same story #if i take the game at face value then there's literally nothing to talk about. i just straight up do not care. #but analyzing all the fucked up implications nintendo accidentally included? now thats a story to talk about #i dont think ganondorf is secretly a really nice guy. i think he's more interesting if he's actually a complete bastard #but he's a complete bastard that has a point and if the game wont acknowledge that then i will #sure the people he's fighting against seem nice. but they're not actually good people #i mean ffs zelda certainly doesnt seem concerned that she last saw link taking a fatal blow for her then jumping into a bottomless pit #she doesn't even consider that he might be dead. or just unable/unwilling to fight after being horrifically wounded #at least BOTW had the decency to ask Link if he was willing to risk his life to fight ganon

[singularobject]

#so.rt #zopp #i. i dont know what happened. #i realized what zoro was wearing in the intro. blacked out. and when i came to this was on my canvas #your shirt. is too open. sir. why bother havingi t buttoned at all. its just one button. its not doing anything #yknow what. h*ck it we ball #zosopp #sorry for disgracing the main tag with these scribbles but idc im proud of this one

[mylittleredgirl]

😏 everyone has two straws hands

#i really do think that this is how traphawk would happen the first time btw... (with anyone i mean not specifically nurse margie here) #and not because of homophobia or anything just because bisexuality was not really a known quantity #and they both like chicks! so would they even really think about it?? but after that one time like #i mean if there are no birds available why even bother leaving the nest #and sometimes who needs to bother with the birds at all. you know??? #(but i'm in the hawkeye x margaret x trapper feelings today folks) #mashblogging #mash

[mishy-mashy]

I said this in a whole reblog, but just copy-pasting to a separate post because I think it'll give some reading comprehension and reblogs don't show up in the search feature.. again, I'm reiterating what I said in another post.

Go check out @demidokuriya 's post for this; OP's post made me put this all down in like. 20 minutes. Mind went vroom vroom cuz HEY THEY'RE ONTO SOMETHING.

(They also reblogged the post with some hint to some behind the scenes of what led to the ideas if you wanna check that out)

Look below at how, when Mineta told AFO to spare Tokoyami, AFO specifically went "..."

He remembers Jirou and thinks, The braying howls of the weak...

He was going to take Tokoyami's Quirk. He took Hawks'. But after Mineta pleaded with him, AFO just straight-up left and didn't take anyone else's Quirk.

AFO saw Yoichi in Mineta.

These scenes are near-identical to each other.

Mineta and Yoichi (at that time) are both much smaller than the normal person at their age

They're both hurt, yet dragged themselves up from the ground to throw something at AFO, to get his attention and make their voice

Both are considered weak, even if they have a Quirk (Mineta's Pop-Off and Yoichi's undeveloped Factor)

The fact that Yoichi got AFO's attention here by throwing a can at him, while Mineta got his attention by throwing a Pop-Off ball; and it stuck.

Mineta's call for his attention landed and actually stuck to AFO. This is unlike when Yoichi and his can bounced off, and AFO kicked him, not listening to him; AFO listened to Mineta and left Tokoyami alone, technically doing what Mineta wanted—to not hurt this person.

AFO just went on to hurt more people away from Mineta's [Yoichi's] eyes so the small weakling wouldn't see.

Yoichi and Mineta both cried to AFO to not hurt in his ways, when AFO was intent on stealing people's Quirks

AFO even stole Hawks' Quirk during this time.

He had time to steal Hawks' Quirk, and though he could've tossed him to the side, he let Hawks stand in his way.

He had the energy. Right after this event, he flew off and left the scene. But he didn't go for Tokoyami immediately.

And this let Mineta play his part, and remind AFO of Yoichi.

"A putrid, festering Quirk Factor."

That sounds like Yoichi, AFO.

".. such garbage."

Hey hey hey, what did Yoichi throw at him when they were kids?

A discarded can. Garbage.

This chapter (385) where AFO listens to Mineta is literally called [A Youthful Urge].

Mineta told AFO to take his Pop-Off (hurt him) instead. But last time, AFO hurt Yoichi by kicking him; this time, AFO not only listened to Mineta to not hurt Tokoyami, but didn't touch Mineta at all.

Even though this time, Mineta [Yoichi] offered to take that place of suffering.

Yoichi didn't do that back then. AFO just turned on little Yoichi anyway.

Yoichi through his whole existence is literally [the braying howls of the weak]. AFO acknowledges he's weak and idealistic, yet he still loves him.

Side note about this panel, I think it's interesting that in this vision, this was the first time we saw Yoichi's eyes: when he was being defiant, despite being pushed down by someone much stronger than him.

Really characteristic of him, honestly. Yoichi's soft-spoken and frail, but it's always reiterated that Yoichi had a powerful will against his stronger big brother.

Mineta at this moment reminded him too much of Yoichi, because the two scenes are near-identical to each other. Parallels, really.

Reiterating something from OP's post that I reblogged this from;

"The reminder of his brother made him uncomfortable, so he hurried away."

AFO didn't want to hurt Yoichi again.

#i really dont mean to steal the post from op this fandoms reading comprehension just bothers me #cuz i see too many takes being that horikoshi is an IDIOT who DOESNT KNOW WHAT HES DOING and RUINED A GREAT STORY #and this should only be FEEL-GOOD- #ahahahaha NO. #horikoshi is a genius and him labeling the manga as shounen attributes to a worse-level-of-understanding from the audience #reblog #technically #mha #bnha #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #yoichi shigaraki #minoru mineta #afo #all for one #ofa #one for all #spoilers #the reason i started posting bnha stuff was to add some of my own reading comprehension #horikoshi is really smart honestly #poor yoichi AFO saw him in mineta #minetas supposed to be likeable but hes creepy toward girls #but if mineta were tall and nothing else changed i bet some people would like him romantically #reblogs dont show unless its from someone you follow or in the fyp page and i go to the chapters of rewound afo a lot #cuz. cough. hes hot. why #hes an ugly baby and more western or greek(?)-looking as a grown man but between those ages? hes hot and looks like yoichi #im sorry im not trying to hijack anything i swear #im not very smart but i like psychoanalysis and foreshadowing #this was just my reblog adding onto what op said. check the og post for more context #i wouldnt have thought about this on my own. originally thought AFO sparing tokoyami was just for the series fans

[oceanwithouthermoon]

sometimes i think about how the people who hate on my takes on here would talk to each other and its always phrased like the twitter fandom drama i see but completely irrational and it makes me giggle

"calling kusuke abusive just because he shot his brother with a lethal weapon, plotted his murder, planned to use their grandparents to assist in hurting/killing him, and tried for years to expose his secret to the entire world against his will and through knowingly hurtful means in order to destroy everything he cared about is so stupid! what a stretch!"

"the saiki k fandom is so damn sensitive. i shoot my brother with massive guns all the time and its not abusive because he just blocks it!" HELPEKSJJSJSKSKKS

#sorry i have absolutely no beef with anyone this is just funny #its just an opinion and i have nothing against people with a different opinion than me #its just funny how they think IM irrational when this is legitimately their thought process #and they come directly onto MY page and cry about people having diff opinions #like girl u do NOT see me doing that shit thats so embarrassing stop #im not even a kusuke hater like thats my man #but even if i was- i dont get why that bothers people so much like y r u so scared of different opinions #i sometimes talk about teru or saiki haters i dont like but that isnt defined by 'literally anyone who doesnt like them' #idgaf if people hate my fav characters- i just hate the WAY certain people hate them that shows they didnt understand the show #YOUR definition of 'evil kusuke haters who must be purged from this fandom' is literally anyone who has an opinion on him- #-that isnt sunshine and rainbows and kusuke is the most morally right and sympathetic character and nobody else deserves him !1!1! ur crazy #oh this isn't targeted at any specific person btw im just being dramatic #i havent acknowledged this at all in months idk what compelled me to do so now #the single anon that barely even said anything just made me think back to this #nobody gets him like i do i swear i swear #saiki k #tdlosk #the disastrous life of saiki k. #saiki kusuke #meows post

[mayullla]

NO I AM NOT OKAY. IF THIS PERSON WHO DID IT IS SOMEONE WHO FOLLOWS ME TAKE IT FREAKING DOWN. I NEVER GAVE PERMISSION FOR SOMETHING LIKE THIS AND NEVER WILL.

If someone knows about this fic. Please please please I beg you please send a link to me so that I could report it. If I remember correctly it is only the author who could report something being stolen on wattpad. (The story they took from is one of my original works that is Just One Drop) And please if you do know or if you find out don't go attacking this person.

#i dont know how to react to this... lost sleep a couple of time cause i was always scared that one day i will find out that someone #stole my works and say that it was there own or something like that. #but now that it finally happened i feel like a deflated balloon more than anything #more of the mentally of like “I guess it finally happened to me.” i cant say i am too surprised about this situation #but i am definitely not happy about this at all. #if you are someone who stole one of my works why do you even do this? #likes or whatever??? there is literally nothing nice about the whole thing. do you feel happy? #do you feel happy that you get likes over something that you didnt make? will anything do to make you happy then at this point?? #i am not trying to be understanding here i am trying to get it in your skull that in the end #you get nothing from this #doing something like this will only get you likes if not that numbers then what else? You built everything on stuff that didnt belong to yo #fame? what fame could you even get from something like this. sooner or later you might just abandon it and then what?? #there is nothing to feel good about it. #this is the reason why people hesitate to even post stuff online at this point cause why even bother #when everything that we make will be stolen at one point and posted again under someone else when we clearly said that we do not want that

[icewindandboringhorror]

boy in silly sitting positions compilation

#cats #I especially like the last one where he just has one single paw poking out of that box for some reason lol #I still have costumes to post and like a billion other things.... grr... constantly failing at staying active on social media aughh #I think because currently my Main Focus is on trying to get my game done and stuff.. which basically just means sitting and writing all day #so there's not much to post about. Though I know the Good At Social Media thing to do would be to post about the #writing and share progress and talk about the game and characters or whatever to try to build interest or something but that is SOOO weird #to me.. I could maybe get it if it was like a tiny tiny discord groupchat of playtesters with like 5 people in #it.. But something about talking openly about things before they happen is weird to me?? Like presumptuous feeling or something #''oooo guess whats gonna happen LATER!!!'' like.. how do you know.. what if it doesnt. what if you dont finish it. what if its not the way #you think it's going to be. what if something changes. etc. Like I literally avoid movie trailers and game trailers for the same reason ghj #Even if it's not ME doing it it just feels... weird.. Maybe it has to do with my OCD and how I just don't like talking about ''future'' #things in Certain Terms. Like if I was going to say ''Oh yeah sure. come over to my house in a few months''. I would have to follow it up #with like ''HOPEFULLY you can come over to my house in a few months'' or 'They'll come over in a few months MOST LIKELY''. Because just #stating that something will happen matter of factly takes for granted like.. what if somehting horrible happens and I DONT have a house #in a few months? or what if something bad happens to me. or to the person coming over? I can't ever DEFINITELY say with 100% certainty #that one could ACTUALLY come to my house in a few months. anything could change. So I have to allot for that in my phrasing. hbjjkn #There are a lot of situations where you're expected to just Assume Things but for some reason that bothers me. My brain literally does not #even Assume the most basic things.. like how do *I* know that just because it's someones birthday that they want to be wished a happy #birthday? what if they dont? everyone is different and has different preferences. I should check with them first. or wait until they public #ly announce that theyre accepting birthday wishes. I have to allot for all 5034859069 rare possibilities at any given time and never take #anything for certain. etc. ghjbjhbh.... ANYWAY.. I have been feeling a bit sick lately as usual.. but still slowly making progress on some #things. Moslty I need to edit costume photos. make sculptures. and work on the game. Going back reading some of the old writing from like #2018 and suprisingly I don't have to change that much of it? In fact I like it mostly. so that's good. I would be very interested if I were #playing the game myself. Though that doesnt mean much since my tastes are so niche lol.. #Still really want to clear some of my million tumblr drafts as well... alas and aughh and ooughh and so on and so forth. Between all of my #evil appointments other such things...why cant I have one billion dollar to retire into relaxed hermit artist life of no stressors.. bleas

[mainapnifavouritehoon]

hi guys i-

#Hey so i wanted to talk about this really bad this has been bothering me for quite some time #i have been busy a lot these days and i dont get time at all to do anything but i can see myself wasting my time just scrolling #I have school and then coaching and then ofc i have to study on my own for which i barely take out time as im highly careless #My last 2 exams went absolute shit and that fucking scares me because i'll be having my JEE soon #Mummy has been telling me to stay away from my phone and ik she trusts me but she but she deserves a daughter that studies ig? #And now i kind of consider that as an option because this phone is very very distracting #I have been thinking about deactivating but i realized it would mean i would lose all my precious posts and interactions #So i wont be deleting this blog as i am too attached (i will be coming back istg) #I will be taking a break and ig thats what yall call a hiatus #I will be giving away my phone to my parents (trust me i have to) #Ik this will be hard for me to just leave all of a sudden so i'll slowly start vanishing if that makes sense? #This message also doesnt mean that i will be shutting down my phone rn at this moment and that this is goodbye #This is just to prepare the people that i love and who love me that i will be highly inactive and not come online for maybe months #This is not an impulsive decisions i have really thought through this #Also just to tell you again MAIN ABHI GAYAB NAHI HONE WAALI BUT THODE TIME MEIN I WILL GO ON A BREAK THIS IS JUST A PRE HIATUS MESSAGE #Also i hope you guys will still love me and remember me once i come back #Because coming months are going to be hard for me #I hope you understand and ily guys okay? #(Oh god why am i so dramatic about everything) xoxo

[uncanny-tranny]

I have so many complex feelings about self-harm, but something I feel people don't really think about is how traumatic it can be. I guess many people see it as a "this is all your fault" type of situation, but I really think that does us a disservice and further isolates and encourages self-harm as an act of coping.

It is traumatic at times, maybe not the act itself for some people, but the way those who engage in any self-harming behaviour is treated. I've talked about this before, but I cannot underestimate just how important these conversations are and maintaining compassion and care first rather than shame and humiliation. Everybody needs to be educated about these topics, I think. It is that important.

#mental health advocacy #self harm tw #self harm mention tw #sh tw #trauma #trauma tw #plus at a certain age that self-harming behaviour is literally out of the person's control i think #like tell me that at age three i could do anything else other than that #so i don't buy into the brutalist idea of 'deal with it on your own and stop bothering us; this is ALL your fault' #ask to tag (genuine) #the importance of these topics are why i talk about them so so much #because i suffered NEEDLESSLY and i never ever want that to happen ever again #i was failed. but that doesn't mean y'all have to be

[mamawasatesttube]

*opens timkon tag* man i hope i can find something in here that's even vaguely in-character and like actually about tim and kon!

hmm. don't like that! *mutes an author*

hmm. don't like that! *mutes an author*

hmm. don't like that! *mutes an author*

hmm. don't like that! *mutes an author*

hmm. don't like that! *mutes an author*

hmm. don't like that! *mutes And blocks an author*

*closes timkon tag*

#WHY DO I EVEN BOTHER... #my head hurty so bad why is this tag a hellscape full of people who don't read comics #i just want something fun to read to distract me from the migraine. and yet. 😩😩😩😩 #rimi talks #maybe it's for the best i probably shouldn't do anything that'll strain my eyes. except that being in pain all day is fucking boring

[corvidcall]

i very rarely get a sense of satisfaction from completing tasks. ive heard people say this is an ADHD thing, but idk. personally i think i might just be bad at being alive

#anime life #i wish i could do something for myself but it just feels so hollow. like why fucking bother yknow? #i wrote a lot of my fic Book of Red Murder and then started to lose steam #and i thought maybe posting it would encourage me to finish it #and it did at first #but then there wasn't a lot of readership or energy around it #which like. is fine and not weird. it's not a big deal and it's not like it's something im OWED #and also i had. a bit of a mental breakdown and had to stop being active in the fandom #so now DEFINITELY no one's gonna read it lol #idk i feel bad even posting about it because i don't want anyone to feel bad or like im trying to guilt anyone about it #i just have trouble articulating what i feel and why and it helps me to try to reason it out #no one did anything wrong but i think it's still understandable for me to say that i was discouraged #when it felt like people didn't really like my writing. or. to be honest. me as a person #i guess the lesson here (if there is one at all) is that if you like a fic you should probably tell the person writing it

[xamaxenta]

crashes in thru the window A Vision. Ive Seen A Vision. sabos hands are covered in scars from using his dragon claw thingy and professional martial artists like brickbreakers and shit literally have their bones thicken over time from healing microfractures to provide more strength and power BUT it can come at the cost of joint pain and/or arthritis especially with age. what im saying is scarred calloused weapons of mass destruction sabo hands and rough warm physicians tools, lifetime of rope and rigging and worn ships marco the phoenix hands, gently easing the very literal ache in sabos bones with his two hands cupped around sabos (and sabo is slighter, his hands at first glance look narrow and delicate, but by the time youre close enough to see the scars on his pasty ass skin its too late for you, and marcos workmans hands completely eclipse his) full of warm healing flames . sabo and marco bite and snark and tease and fuck nasty so much that some ppl cannot tell if they like or hate each other but at the end of the day there is no one sabo trusts more to look over his strongest most intimate weapons (LITERALLY attached to/part of his body) like honing the fine edge of a blade that cuts anyone who touches it . but marco bleeds fire. they bicker and argue and tease but here it is silent. the only sounds are the warm rustle of callouses dragging against each other abd the soft rumble of crackling phoenix fire, louder than a candle but quieter than a lantern, and when it pops and snaps it sounds more like leaves and sea waves carried by the breeze and sabo finally, finally can relax for just a moment

This makes me yearn so much i am so full of yearning rn

Absolutely beautiful commentary of their relationship

Sabo’s a man of many facets and Marco wholly understands this and does what he can to enable it, if anything to protect him

If Sabo needs to be seen as someone dangerous vicious tongued, sharper wit, someone so beyond the league of normal men then Marco, the phoenix, who has had plenty of experience would do anything to enable this image

Because when theyre alone he gets to see Sabo as he is because Sabo trusts him implicitly and that means so much more than any words they could share or any snarky performance for the public could

Its rly soft aaaaaah wnishdoshd

Also the softest imagery of Sabo allowing Marco to look over his hands, press out the hurt, the ache, soothe the angry sharpness in his wrists that flares up whenever he writes, Sabo going boneless into his embrace hes shockingly vulnerable like this, without the squaring of his shoulders and the confident commanding pitch of his voice its easy to see the soft nobility in his form something hes striven to move beyond

#marcosabo #marsab #MAS #and Ace is like why bother with this performance at all??? #sabo; there’s a heirarchy i have to establish for my public image #ace: but how come u dont do that w me #sabo: darling… no one expects anything other than adoration when it comes to you #ace: :0 #anyway Marco’s happy to bicker its fun #and later when hes sitting legs tangled with sabos in peace hes like that went well #sabo leans in to snuggle against him like yeah #thanks #its a little complicated just a bit haha

[sarellathesphinx]

My biggest character flaw is that every time I see something about abt Cait being just a robot without his own personality, I can’t help writing a tag novel about how much I refuse to accept it

#and I’ll do it again by god #none of it makes any sense of Reeve is piloting him at all times it just doesn’t. why did anything in temple of the ancients happen the way #it does *when he’s alone* #why would Reeve bother talking to himself like this!! #why! it’s fruitless! #if remake part 3 refutes this. I will fight nojima in hand to hand combat myself #text #cait sith #reeve tuesti #tagging for my own purposes. sorry if this shows up in their tags lol

[oceanwithouthermoon]

i think its weird that i have to make this disclaimer but the internet is crazy so wtvr,, anyway,,

if i say i dont like something, that doesnt mean "that thing is bad and nobody should post it.."

i swear literally every time i even mention that i dislike something, people will go "wow does that mean u fucking hate me cuz i post that thing? ur a fucking stupid bitch and all ur opinions r wrong" LIKE ?? er.. no. just because i say i dont like certain characterizations of certain characters (the saiki k fandom is CRAZY about this cuz i can state an opinion on literally any character and a group of people will still go 'well only we're allowed to post our opinions about them because we're always right!1!1!'), or certain ship tropes (mentioned my hatred of toxic yaoi maybe once or twice on here months ago and people STILL get mad at me as if i said toxic yaoi lovers r evil or something), or certain ships, or WHATEVER, does not mean that i HATE the people who are posting them or that i think they shouldnt post them at all, NO, im just posting about my personal tastes on my personal blog and it would be extremely weird and hypocritical if i decided that i was the ONLY person that was allowed to do that,,

i think the only reason people assume that is because there are a lot of other people on here who ARE like that, and a lot of people toe the line between posting that they dont like something and posting that they think everyone who likes that thing is stupid, annoying, and wrong,, so i guess all i can say is, sorry for whatever made you make these assumptions but they arent true about me so plz leave me alone ʘ‿ʘ ur doing the same thing to me that ur accusing me of but i didnt do it in the first place so ur just actively being a dick for no reason

#crazy that the mindset some people on here have is that theyre the only ones allowed to post their opinions #ive repeated this a lot on this blog but i rlly think people forget that the person on the other side of the screen is in fact a person #if ur harassing people and publicly making fun of them then ur just as bad as any real life bully #that shit isnt as funny or harmless as u like to pretend it is #not once have i ever targetted anyone or went on someones blog to harass them over my opinion #yet people think its fine to do the same to me and treat it as if its like. revenge or something #like ? me saying 'i dont like toxic yaoi' is not equivalent to someone going on someone elses page and going 'how tf do u like toxic yaoi' #I DONT CARE !! all ive ever done is sit in my own little bubble and had opinions and that makes people mad #honestly though the people who will publicly talk and post abt it are significantly meaner #and i want to act like im not bothered by it because i know most of them r just angry that someone has a different opinion #and they want all their followers to bandwagon off of them (idk why maybe for validation or whatever-same reasons anyone would bully) #but seriously if u actually do think that something i said was out of line and crossed thise boundaries- just fucking tell me ? #im a person bro. ur solution to disagreeing with me shouldnt be 'lol im gonna post abt this and make everyone harass them' #have a conversation with me dude i dont bite ? if u cant talk to me like a person then just dont fucking say anything wtf #its so cowardly to be like 'well no i didnt wanna say anything to u cuz i didnt wanna be rude.. so instead i publicly made fun of u!' #LIKE WHATTTT STOPPPPP </3333 #ok anyway this post wasnt supposed to get THAT serious. #MY POINT IS just be considerate of other people and dont base ur hatred off of assumptions #ur deflecting the blame onto someone else because u dont want to admit that ur just a fucking bully lol #being inconsiderate on here is something ive also been guilty of back when i first joined the fandom and was clueless #but grown ass adults who have been on here way longer r still doing that shit which is crazy #and i cant say anything because they have so much leverage over me and idk if its on purpose or if they dont even realize #ok im putting fandom tags cuz i want people to see this sorry. this is my one post thats actually targetted but its at a lot of people #so if u look at this and think 'hey i do that' pls evaluate urself<3 #i mean its also targetted at everyone who does this anonomously so i dont know who it is OKOK IM DONE BYE SORRY HOPE THIS IS UNDERSTANDABLE #watch nobody read this fr #saiki k #tdlosk #the disastrous life of saiki k. #meows post