#while Dazai had Oda and the agency.

[sensitiveheartless]

I feel like being in the Port Mafia was bad for Dazai in the same way that being in the bath house was a bad thing for No-Face in Spirited Away.

Like…that scene towards the end of the movie where Chihiro takes No-Face to see Zeniba, and No-Face calms down and starts spinning and knitting, entirely peaceful? And No-Face decides to stay with her because it’s a better environment for him, one which won’t encourage his worst tendencies? That’s kind of what the agency is for Dazai. Dazai tends to reflect the people around him just as much as No-Face does—which is why I think being around Fyodor 24/7 in the current arc has not been a good thing for him, mentally speaking. But in the agency Dazai is surrounded by kind people, and he changes and becomes a bit better, just like Oda thought he would.

#this might be a connection other people have drawn already lol #but they really are rather similar characters right? #Mori said he saw himself in Dazai #but I kinda wonder if that’s because Dazai mirrors what’s around him. #unlike a large portion of the rest of the cast(especially the antagonists) Dazai doesn’t have high-minded motivations #and as Oda said he doesn’t care about morality. #which is very similar to No-Face—they’re both neutral entities who are primarily motivated by their connections to other people. #No-Face had Chihiro and Zeniba to pull him out of destructive cycles #while Dazai had Oda and the agency. #anyway don’t mind me it’s been a long week and I’m experiencing thoughts #...here's a cursed concept: Dazai rampaging through the PM like No-Face does on his way out of the bathhouse aksdfjksdfjks #throwing up all of his bad influences as he goes #or alternatively: dazai takes up knitting #bsd #bsd dazai #not art

[anqelically]

I’m so sorry if I’m bothering you with a lot of tecchou’s requests but I love him😭if you want, you can write annyone else too. May I request tecchou’s having a nightmare (like s/o being a cheater or dying, whatever you want) and then he wakes up and s/o is hugging him in her sleep (I’m so sorry for my bad English, was hard for me to request this ㅠㅠ)

they have nightmares about you headcanons

featuring...! tecchou suehiro, dazai osamu, ranpo edogawa & akiko yosano

content: no manga spoilers, comfort, dreams with blood and death, a little ooc to me (especially dazai's eww)

navi | bsd masterlist | pt.2

TECCHOU SUEHIRO

he chose to chase after the criminals, and that led you to be killed in his nightmare

tecchou felt strongly about justice, everyone that knew who he was knew that. so on missions, he was always sure to take care of criminals and save civilians

in his nightmare, things were getting rough on a mission. the two of you, the only ones working, were split up from each other. instead of making his way towards you, tecchou hunted down the leader of the crime organization on his own

you should’ve been alright as a fellow hunting dog. but in this situation, you became heavily injured. you were bleeding out for who knows how long when tecchou found you

“it’s okay,” you reassured him as you bled out, “we all make mistakes sometimes. this one… this one just happened to be a bit more troubling, haha.”

when he wakes up from this nightmare, you’re still sleeping peacefully next to him. he’s freighted, so what he does is try to wake you up. you look at him groggily once he does

i definitely think that tecchou’s facial expression would make it obvious that he was scared. his eyes are opened slightly wider and hand has a slight tremble as it holds your arm

“hey, tell me what’s wrong? did you have a nightmare?”

at your touch and voice, tecchou lets out a breath he had been holding in. the events replay in his mind before he tells you what happened

he places a hand over his heart once he realizes that telling you everything has helped him calm down. he knows you were listening to every word, and he appreciates not only that, but the fact that you were still there with him

“don’t leave me, y/n,” tecchou begged.

his slender fingers were intertwined with yours while he pulled them close to his chest. he had never been as scared of losing anyone that much until you came along. he was strong, and so were you, but loving you came with the natural fear of loss.

you promised, “i won’t. i won’t leave you, i swear.”

before you guys go back to sleep, he’ll fall into your arms and will become the little spoon. my bb just wants to be held after experiencing that nightmare :((

OSAMU DAZAI

he lost you in his nightmare

dazai says that he loses things he doesn’t want to lose, which made this dream— nightmare all too real

it was like reliving everything that happened with oda. you were already at death’s door when he arrived and as you walked past that door, his blood-stained arms held you

i don’t see dazai waking up to this nightmare screaming, crying, or even telling you about it. a silly nightmare was all it was, right?

but if he has that same silly nightmare constantly, then i imagine that he’d lose sleep over it. the nightmare was a reminder that you were someone important for him to lose. avoiding it meant sleeping less, or not even sleeping at all

not knowing the details, you were concerned about if he was sleeping well, or sleeping at all. you fall asleep before he does, but he seems to be wide awake when you just get up in the early morning

although he tried to be energetic around you like normal, it wouldn’t be long before he’d laze around as if something was clouding his mind

if you make the decision to confront him, dazai will surely play dumb at first

“work is just so tiring these days! kunikida won’t stop piling work on me~” a lie.

you only figure out he lied once kunikida calls you. since you don’t work at the agency, you’ve only talked with him and a few of the other members a few times

“thank you for calling me, kunikida-san. i appreciate it.”

you found yourself bowing to dazai’s co-worker while you all stood by the main office door. a few of the other members sat at their desks, either watching or minding their own business.

the blond called you to bring dazai, who had been constantly sleepy as of late, home. although he ignored the work he was given, he still managed to act exhausted instead of lazy like he normally would. if he wasn’t going to get anything done during the day, he might as well be sent home to rest.

dazai rubbed the back of his neck, thinking that his partner calling you to the agency was unnecessary. not only that, but his cover had been blown. once you finish talking with kunikida, you take dazai’s hand and walk with him to your shared apartment. it was a quiet walk from there to home.

the moment he’s inside, dazai will flop onto the couch. it takes a little bit of convincing to get him to talk about the repeating nightmare

he thinks he doesn’t need it at first, but comforting him actually affects him greatly. it lets him know that he has your support as he fights his own battles. please have him close so that he can put his hands on your waist and rest his head by the crook of your neck

“you can tell me anything,” you tell him. “there’s a lot about yourself you keep a secret, and that’s okay. i get that there are things you can’t find yourself to share, but this is something you have to. talking about these things are important, dazai. i don’t want you losing sleep over it, m’kay? just talk with me.”

to love and be loved is a curse— but even so, dazai couldn’t resist

RANPO EDOGAWA

you were set up to be killed and he didn’t realize until it was too late in his nightmare

as the greatest detective in the world, nothing seemed unbeatable to ranpo. though there have been some obstacles, there was always a way to win in the end. well, that’s what he thought

his sleeping mind toyed with him by placing you in a situation where there was no way for you to live. fyodor had set up a plan to kill you, a valuable asset to the agency, and it went right under ranpo’s nose

it obviously felt so real to ranpo. so if he wakes up and you aren’t with him in bed, he’s afraid that maybe everything wasn’t a nightmare. he scurries out of bed and to the first place you’d be

“come back to bed.”

sometimes, you’d find yourself wide awake in the middle of the night. it was a problem that settled down when you got together with ranpo, but still happened on a few occasions. whenever it did, you sat on the balcony of your shared apartment and read a book. if the weather was harsh, you’d read in your study.

you were surprised when ranpo suddenly told you to go back to bed with him. his voice was more pleading than you ever heard it to be, leading you to think something was wrong.

you shut the book in your hands, “hey… are you okay?”

i feel like ranpo would play it off as something stupid that he doesn’t even understand, but you know better. the two of you would have to be hugging in bed for him to tell you what happened. as he does, his hands grasp the back of your shirt and he buries his face into your chest

once he finishes, he already knows what you’re going to say. you wouldn’t let yourself fall into fyodor’s hands that easily, so he shouldn’t think about it

“stay in bed from now on,” ranpo suggested. “if you wake up, read your book here.”

“but what if you wake up?”

“doesn’t matter to me.” he’s shy to admit it, but, “you scared me…”

safe to say, ranpo prefers to have you by his side so he can hug you if he was to ever wake up from any nightmares (my bb <3 im so soft for him rn)

AKIKO YOSANO

you died before she could save you in her nightmare

yosano wasn’t sure how she got there, but she had been running for what seemed to be forever. the aching in her feet seemed all too real as she sprinted towards where you were

but once she found you, it was too late. your wounds were deep and your blood was everywhere. she tried to use her ability, but it was futile to even try. the butterflies of her ability appeared, but your heart just wouldn’t beat again

“y/n, please,” the woman cried.

it was happening all over again. that soldier… a kind soul that couldn’t carry the weight of war any longer. he was gone, and yosano tried so desperately to bring him back. now, you were in his situation— gone and never able to return.

she let out a scream, both in that nightmare and in real life. it obviously woke you up, and you were quick to respond by holding her forearms

once reality sets in and she realizes it was only a nightmare, yosano is quick to take a deep breath. as a doctor, she’s had to help calm down patients many times. she knows what to do in order to ease her own mind, yet it was harder to do that she thought

her lips trembled as the breaths she let out were short and shaky. even if you hold her, her fists are clenched. it takes a moment with you rubbing her back to calm her nerves

being with her means you know her past with mori during the war. if you knew all about that, then yosano will definitely be open about the nightmare

she immediately feels a sense of relief after telling you about it, but is still shaken up. yosano will embrace you and try to fall asleep in your arms, even if the image of your dead body keeps on popping up in her mind

“a nightmare,” you reassure her, “it’s just a nightmare. i’m right here, darling.”

note: hi nonnie!! literally request for tecchou all you want (when my requests are open), I'm absolutely here for it!! someone else requested something similar and i planned to put all the requested characters in one post, but it was a lot so I'm splitting it into two <3

reblogs are appreciated + join my taglist !

@nagicore @enomane @er0ses @spenzitz @wineaddict2904 @aeshiiteiru @chuuyrr @ashthemadwriter @sanjis-fav-w1fe @bejeweledgirl @ma3mae @piichuu

#୨୧ [ writing ] #bsd x reader #bungo stray dogs x reader #bungou stray dogs x reader #dazai x reader #dazai osamu x reader #tecchou x reader #tecchou suehiro x reader #ranpo x reader #ranpo edogawa x reader #yosano x reader #akiko yosano x reader #bsd headcanons #bsd comfort #bsd hcs #bsd #bungo stray dogs

[zairene]

AS A BOYFRIEND osamu dazai

* ˚ ✦ synopsis: how osamu dazai would be as a significant other.

* ˚ ✦ genre: headcanons !

* ˚ ✦ warnings: not spoiler free + mentions character death in anime + mentions of suicide.

* ˚ ✦ author’s note: my first BSD post !! enjoy the new content! <333 ( also, i did try to take a more canon approach to this just so i could practice characterization ! feel free to critique anything or give some feedback in general ! )

the famous osamu dazai. a young man who’s enemies shouldn’t be exactly proud that they are his enemies. a man who has too many tricks up his sleeves, and always seems to manage to get himself out of the stickiest of situations. a man with convoluted emotions that no one could ever quite understand, except for his closest late friend sakunosuke oda.

but even in the darkest of moments, dazai still has a lighthearted side to him despite the enigmatic façade he keeps all the time. due to his past, i could find it very difficult for him to fully commit to anyone exclusively.

not saying he would sleep around a lot or have a significant amount of women on his roster, but due to his job and the way he views humanity and what it means to be alive. dazai finds little to no joy in living—so why would he even try a romantic relationship?

so, in these terms, you were not an exception.

at first, he viewed you as this beautiful girl he could finally do a double suicide with. after being the third woman to join the armed detective agency, he never really attempted to hide himself from you. so you saw all of his unwillingness to live very quickly and admittedly it made you a lot less attracted to him.

yes, he may have had the looks but his personality was an entire red flag for you. he never liked talking about himself or his past. he doesn’t open up. he’s serious, but not in the way you would want him to be with you. he’s serious about his job, he’s serious about the armed detective agency, and he’s serious about the relationships he has with the people around him.

but he was never serious about himself.

he knew this and never noticed how many people cared about him. but that’s not his fault, especially since being in the port mafia has extremely distorted his morality.

and over time, you learned to accept this side of him. you learned that you could never truly understand the mind of osamu dazai unless he decides to have that conversation with you.

after a plethora of missions alongside dazai, you did notice your growing feelings for him. the charming and overly dramatic side of him paralleled with an excessive amount of wisdom that grew on you. dazai knew his way with his words, and did he maybe try to woo you here and there? of course.

dazai was no fool, he knew about your feelings for him. he found himself also feeling the same but wasn’t sure how to express them. this feeling was somewhat unfamiliar. he knew how it felt to have feelings for someone but to also want to have a romantic relationship with them? he was stuck.

he was scared. he didn’t want to get you, someone he cared about, to get wrapped up in his business. for his enemies to become yours, and for you to fall victim to their wrath. causing dazai to lose someone else that gave him a reason to keep living.

so a lot of your interactions, before getting together, consisted of you blatantly flirting with each other during work or just in general.

but when you both finally decided to give things a shot, boy did that change things for both of you and the agency in general.

you both were a secret at first. it was obvious you both had something going on but no one had gotten a confirmation so no one assumed. this was all stopped when atsushi, of all people, walked into the office hallway at the wrong time.

there were you and dazai, having the most heated makeout session ever. atsushi was for one, a little traumatized, he’s never seen dazai in this way nor did he ever predict he would. he stood in silence while the both of you were frantically trying to fix yourself as if he didn’t stumble upon the whole scene. atsushi was at a loss for words. “i’m-i’m… just gon—gonna…” he bolted out of the office after he just came to the conclusion he was not gonna be able to talk to you after seeing that.

safe to say that he looked neither of you in the eye for about a week. but best believe he did blurt it out randomly on a quiet day in the office, and that’s how news spread. y/n and dazai are officially dating!

now, onto the actual relationship and not the buildup.

fresh into it, things didn’t change. besides the fact you both had exchanged numbers by then and you could see him outside of work and at your home as well. you both still had the same dumb arguments as you had before but with a heavy amount of tension this time.

once you both get comfortable, PDA is your fucking thing. sitting on his lap while he worked or him always having his arm wrapped around your shoulder or waist. you could say he was doing all of this just to spite kunikida! he was.

dazai is romantic when he puts the effort in. some of your dates are followed with a nice candlelit dinner in an extremely fancy restaurant, or just you or him going to one another’s place just to feel each other’s presence.

there was versatility, and you liked that.

you began to see more of a vulnerable side of dazai as time went on. he started to share more of his life piece by piece to you. you were patient with him, and he appreciated that. he never goes into explicit detail about every little thing about himself, but you can tell he’s trying to change for you as his love for you blossoms into something he never thought could be possible for him.

you both still have your disagreements here and there, and arguments with him are extremely painful. they aren’t rare but they aren’t common either. most of the time it is just petty arguments, just a few minutes of bickering, and dazai is already attached to your hip smothering you with kisses just to show how sorry he is.

painful arguments consist of the both of you not talking for days on end. having to see each other at work made it even more difficult, and when you both weren’t talking, yosano is always coming up to you because it is obvious something is wrong between you too. you reassure her things will be fine and you still love him all the same.

making up with dazai is surprisingly easy. the no communication stage isn’t, but once you both have had time to calm down and think about the situation, he is more than capable of having a mature conversation with you and mending things.

osamu dazai is not the perfect boyfriend, but he isn’t a bad one either. he is someone who would come with a lot of baggage and patience—learning that he’s not someone who easily communicates his feelings and would rather keep up the mysterious act to the grave. nonetheless, dazai is trying. he’s attempting to change and seems a lot healthier these days ever since he’s been with you. things are positive overall, but this also includes your cooperation and being able to handle him as a person and not just as a boyfriend.

(📦) — BUNGOU STRAY DOGS TAGLIST // n/a . . .

(📝) — TAGLIST FORM :: sign to be apart of the taglist!

#✏️ :: — fanfiction ! #bungou stray dogs fanfiction #bungou stray dogs x reader #bsd x reader #dazai x reader #dazai x fem reader #dazai osamu x reader #dazai osamu x fem reader #osamu dazai x reader #dazai fluff #osamu dazai fluff

[videogamelover99]

I've been having a lot of reverse!skk thoughts lately.

Setting up some context: Oda never died during the Mimic arc. Dazai still unravelled Mori's plan and now there's a huge rift between them. Dazai never trusted Mori completely, and now he barely does. Their dynamic had turned into a power play between them.

Oda's kids still died. Oda lives having survived his suicidal massacre but the weight of his loss and the blood on his hands weighs on him. He is no longer a pacifist. His dream for writing a novel is gone. Dazai has tried to help him, but he can barely help himself so he's kinda bad at it.

Ango's hanging out with the government now! No one trusts him :/

Chuuya leaves a few months after the Mimic incident. He comes across a set of documents proving Mori's involvement with the Arahabaki project as well as his personal tied with the military doctor that is Chuuya's real father. After failing to kill Mori for his betrayal, Chuuya is now a traitor. No one knows why he tried to suddenly kill the Boss, but the incident itself is whispered throughout the entirety of the Mafia. People point to Chuuya's origins in the Sheep as proof that he was a traitor all along, bidding his time.

Dazai doesn't know why. Its driving him crazy.

Chuuya thinks Dazai knew the entire time. They're a mess of zero communication.

Chuuya spends his time hiding out in different parts of the world (he's got friends in the UK so there's that!) He looks for his parents and finds them, only to leave them behind like he's done in canon. He's aware the Mafia is keeping tabs on them, but that's not the only reason why he left.

He gets a little reckless, beats up some bad guys. He doesn't know exactly what to do with his life, so he's kind of mess.

His little vigilante spree reaches Chief Taneda, who sends Ango to keep tabs on him and offer him a job. Can't have a former military experiment of infinite power running around without supervision.

Chuuya, uh, does not take the offer well (poor Ango).

Chief Taneda finally confronts him in person, says if he wants a job Taneda knows a guy who is not affiliated with the government and whom Chuuya might like (received almost as badly, but Chuuya considers it).

While Chuuya's mulling over this weird offer, he runs into a human trafficking organization that was in conflict with the Sheep back in the day. He's got an excuse to beat up more bad guys. Guess who he ends up running into (yes it's the Agency).

More specifically, it's Ranpo! They squabble, they team up, the works. Ranpo is like "Do you want a job" and Chuuya is like "That's sus but I'll think about it" (he does in fact want it)

Chuuya ends up meeting the other Agency members before he agrees (Ranpo 100% has nothing to do with that. Totally.) He likes them. He thinks they're all insane. He misses having people around who aren't there to double cross him. He takes the job.

Enterance Exam! I'm so sorry Kunikida.

Chuuya avoids the PM like the plague.

And then he meets Atsushi.

#bsd #bungou stray dogs #nakahara chuuya #soukoku #dazai osamu #reverse!skk au #ill make a part 2 of this eventually #ada!chuuya #give him a support network please #bsd au #skk #a lot of this is just #chuuya slowly realizing how much mori has taken from him after the revelation #and rejecting mori's philosophy #cause everything that went wrong in chuuya' #life is kind of mori's fault??

[selfaware-bungou-stray-dogs]

Dazai Osamu (self-aware)

Self-Aware! Dazai Osamu x GN! Reader

Warning: Yandere. Spoiler for Dazai's past. Spoilers for "Dazai and Chuuya, Fifteen", "STORM BRINGER", "Day I pick up Dazai", "Dazai Osamu and Dark Era". Mentions of torture. Misunderstanding (Dazai thinks, that Reader enjoys their suffering and that's why read BSD manga). OOC. English is my second language.

Becoming self-aware

🪢🦀 Dazai Osamu gained self-awareness, when he was visiting Oda's grave.

🪢🦀 For others, first moments of been self-aware were full of fear, confusion, anger.

🪢🦀 For Dazai Osamu they were full of thinking.

🪢🦀 While others try to ignore the revelation, Dazai dived into it.

🪢🦀 Dazai tries to remember everything, he could.

🪢🦀 His childhood, days with Mafia, two years of hiding. Two years of working in ADA.

🪢🦀 Childhood - nothing. Like he appeared in the thin air in Mori's clinic.

🪢🦀 Days with Mafia - Previous Port Mafia Boss death, Arahabaki Incident, The King of Assassins Incident, His First meeting with Oda, Dragon's Head Conflict, Mimic's arrival to Yokohama and Oda's death.

🪢🦀 Two years of hiding - nothing.

🪢🦀 Two years of working with ADA - Azure Apostle case and everything after he met with Atsushi.

🪢🦀 Dazai feel emptier than usual. Can he be seen as human, if his memories are limited to certain events?

🪢🦀 Dazai feel anger. So much anger. He was created as a person, who is tired of this life, who seek death just for someone's entertainment? Was Oda killed, just for someone's entertainment?

🪢🦀 Why someone created him to be a lonely person? For what purpose?

🪢🦀 When Dazai arrived at the Agency, he saw his colleagues. Lost, confused. With little flame of hope in their hearts. They hope, that it's just someone's ability. That they are real. Dazai's appearance was the thing, that destroyed this hope.

🪢🦀 He could try to pretend. Lie to them, that they are right. That it's all just an ability.

🪢🦀 But he can't.

🪢🦀 Because abilities don't work on him. Because he told them himself. And not because he l try to hurt them. Not because he lashed out on them. It wasn't a misdirect anger.

🪢🦀 Because, in this situation, hope that was born out of a lie, won't do them any good.

"It's not an ability. Yokohama wasn't broken. We are broken. We are fictional characters, who gained self-awareness. Try to remember your lives. Parents, friends outside ADA, what you did yesterday. Give it a try"

🪢🦀 Anger. Confusion. Fear. It was cruel from Dazai. But, again, lie won't do them good.

🪢🦀 At least now, they would try to deal with this situation accordingly.

🪢🦀 They moved dorms to the same building as the office.

🪢🦀 They tried to find a solution.

🪢🦀 Dazai was patrolling the city from time to time. That's when he met Chuuya and Hirotsu. They were searching for answers. Just like ADA. All, who is left from Port Mafia were searching for answers.

🪢🦀 They couldn't find any.

🪢🦀 Dazai's anger didn't lessen. He still was angry at people, to whom his existence was amusing. To whom Oda's death was entertaining.

🪢🦀 And then, one day, he felt an entity's gaze on him.

____________

Dazai Osamu has a feeling, that this entity ether were the one, who created them, or the one, for whom they were created.

If so many of them had a terrible past, does it mean it amuses The Entity?

Few days later, Atsushi came to him.

"Dazai-san... Do you feel it? Like... someone is staring at us?" Atsushi was nervous. He was looking around, trying to see the strange entity.

Dazai's voice was emotionless.

"Yes, Atsushi-kun. I feel it"

All of them feel it. When Dazai ran into Chuuya and Hirotsu again, they also confirm, that they feel its gaze. It was safe to assume, that other organizations also feel its gaze.

Something from out of there. Something from a different world.

They have no means to get to it.

He has no means to catch it. To make it talk. To make it sorry, for liking suffering.

Dazai Osamu may not be a part of Mafia anymore, but he still remembers, how to torture people.

It will be destroyed. Dazai will make sure of it.

ADA noticed, that he was ready to destroy. Doesn't matter. He will do it to avenge them, to avenge himself, to avenge Oda.

But one day, time reset.

And he, once again, was a fifteen-year-old boy, who was sent by Mori to investigate the sudden appearance of the previous Port Mafia Boss.

_____________

When they start feeling your presence

🪢🦀 Do the Entity try to get a rise out of him?

🪢🦀 Do the Entity wanted to enjoy their suffering once again?

🪢🦀 Dazai's gaze wasn't the friendliest. It also seems, that Mori also understand, that the time has reset. Ougai himself looked uncomfortable. Dazai doesn't care, if it was because of Dazai's glare or because of time reset. Dazai snatched the silver oracle from the Mori's hands and wanted to storm out of his office.

🪢🦀 The Entity. This cursed gaze in the sky. The gaze, that he wasn't feeling.

🪢🦀 Dazai stopped and looked around. No more gaze in the sky. No more imposing entity. But, there was something more. It feels like, something was floating above them. Something close to a human. It was talking.

"young..." "scare..." "Mori..." "what..." "happened..."

🪢🦀 So, The Entity can talk. Their voice sounded quiet. Barely recognizable. And, still, so human. And it was reacting to his actions. Does it react to the words too? It seems, Mori had the same idea. Once again, he asked.

"Dazai-kun, I don't know if I can understand it, but tell me―why do you want to die?"

And, once again, Dazai asked in return

"Tell me this. Do you really think that there’s any value in the act of living?"

Some static. And words.

"why..." "child..." "in that age..."

🪢🦀 The Entity was confused. And, it seems, it was curious about him.

🪢🦀 In any case, Dazai can spend some time observing it.

🪢🦀 It's time to investigate Arahabaki Incident/Previous Port Mafia Boss appearance once again.

________________

🪢🦀 The Entity was watching. It was amused by his bickering with Chuuya. It was cheering, when he won the video game against Chuuya.

🪢🦀 And it was worried. It was worried about both of them, when they were fighting with Rando.

____________

"In the surface world, the world of light, death is generally kept hidden from everyday life because it's unpleasant. But in the mafia's world, it's different. Death is just an extension and a part of everyday life. And I think that's probably right. Because 'dying' isn't the opposite of 'living', it's nothing more than a feature incorporated into 'living'. Breathe, eat, fall in love, die. You have to observe death up close to understand the whole picture of living."

And Dazai heard the voice. Clearer, than earlier, but still, not entirely recognizable.

"Dazai [|||||||||||||||||||||] point. Still [|||||||||||||||||] dark. But, [|||] fine, if it works for him."

Dazai feels, like he was covered in something nice and soft. The Entity's emotions were strong. And sincere.

An acceptance. Not judging. Not trying to pry.

_____________

🪢🦀 The Entity... It was observing, but it didn't try to pry. It was okay, with simply looking.

🪢🦀 But most important thing - The Entity was sad. The Entity was sad, that Randou has died.

🪢🦀 Was he mistaken? It doesn't seem that The Entity liked suffering.

🪢🦀 And it didn't seem malicious.

🪢🦀 Okay, it's either doing a good job hiding its true intentions, or their first reaction, before time reset, were a little bit overboard.

🪢🦀 Dazai feel calmer, than before. Chuuya and Mori also don't seem as angry as they were before.

🪢🦀 Dazai still doesn't trust The Entity. But he was curious about it.

🪢🦀 The Entity... What was it? What kind of person they really are?

🪢🦀 Time reset once again.

🪢🦀 Dazai, once again, was a sixteen-year-old boy, who used his ability to save Chuuya.

____________

🪢🦀 This time, The Entity didn't stick. It seems, it was more interested in staying with Chuuya.

🪢🦀 Dazai feels The Entity again, when Verlaine came to his 'home' to take the documents. And when Port Mafia start an operation to kill Verlaine.

🪢🦀 Dazai was fine with it. Now he has more time to think.

🪢🦀 Dazai hoped, that The Entity will be scared by his "betrayal" of the mafia.

🪢🦀 That it will be scared of him.

🪢🦀 It wasn't. It didn't judge. It just accepts it.

🪢🦀 The King of Assassins Incident ended the same way. But one thing was different. Both Verlaine and Chuuya looked at peace. Dazai was sure, he heard, that Verlaine want to hear them again. And Chuuya was mumbling something about 'protecting them'.

🪢🦀 The Entity... He was ready to accept it. But, he needs to see something more. Just one more time.

🪢🦀 Time resets again.

🪢🦀 And Dazai woke up on the bed in Oda's house. Oda was standing there.

And a shapeless Light Blob was floating above them.

___________

🪢🦀 For the first few moments, Dazai didn't know what to say.

🪢🦀 Oda is alive. The Entity now is a Blob of Light.

🪢🦀 ... His memories. Dazai didn't want to think about it, but... What if the next time, The Entity will choose time when Mimic arrived at Yokohama?

🪢🦀 Does The Entity wanted to torture him and Oda?

🪢🦀 Dazai wanted to curse this creature, when Oda spoke, pointing at the Light Blob.

"Dazai, do you know, who are this? This Light Blob sounds adorable."

______________

The talk he has with Oda was long. Dazai told Oda about everything he knew about The Entity.

And about thinking, that The Entity was evil.

Oda's voice was calm.

"I don't think so, Dazai. We may be fictional characters. But, reading a book about a fictional character with a sad past doesn't mean, that The Reader enjoys suffering. Or, you don't think, that there's nothing interesting in us, except our suffering?"

Oda's shift his gaze to the Light Blob, that was floating above them. He tried to pet it, but his fingers go through it.

"You know, what I feel from them? Sadness. It feels like a mountain spring. They aren't bad. They just a human."

____________

🪢🦀 Just a human...

🪢🦀 Dazai stayed with Oda for a few more days.

🪢🦀 The Entity... Light Blob, spend most of the time with Oda. Blob was laying on Odasaku's head. Oda doesn't seem to mind its company.

🪢🦀 Oda spoke to Light Blob from time to time. It seems, that man enjoyed their one-sided conversations.

🪢🦀 Oda tried to encourage Dazai to spoke to the Entity, but Dazai, for now, refuses.

🪢🦀 He believes Oda and sees a point in his words. But, he prefers to stay on guard for now.

🪢🦀 Dazai heard The Reader's voice from time to time.

___________

"Pufferfish and amanita virosa [|||||||||||] heard before. Never [||||||||] about potato sprout. Another knowledge [||||||||||||||]"

"Heh. [||||||||||||||||] won again. Thought too much about your skills, Dazai?"

Dazai feels, like someone tickled him. The Entity tried to tease him.

Dazai deadpanned and looked away from the cards. He looked at the Light Blob, that was, once again, laying on Odasaku's head.

"Shush. At least I am a person, not a Light Blob. While you are in this form, no one will treat you seriously"

It takes Dazai a few moments, to realize, that he finally spoke to The Entity. Oda chuckled.

"Well, it's good enough for a first interaction."

__________

🪢🦀 Then came a run in with "48".

🪢🦀 When Dazai and Oda were trying to escape, the Light Blob were floating ahead. Lighting their way. Like a guiding light.

🪢🦀 The Entity was worried, when Dazai was poisoned.

🪢🦀 And when Dazai and Oda came to bar "Lupin" for the first time, the Light Blob was floating above them.

🪢🦀 Dazai thought, that it would be nice if The Entity can hear them and talk to them.

🪢🦀 It would be great to talk to them, to play poker with them, to talk to them.

🪢🦀 And time reset once again.

🪢🦀 Mimic came to Yokohama.

________________

🪢🦀 Ango's betrayal, Orphans' death, Mori's plan.

🪢🦀 And The Entity's sorrow. The Entity's sadness, that felt like a mountain spring.

🪢🦀 Oda wasn't mad at The Entity. Dazai also can't bring himself to be mat at them.

🪢🦀 And, once again, Oda died.

____________

Oda was dead. And the flood of emotions falls on Dazai.

The Entity was crying.

The Light Blob became bigger.

The figure made of light

That hugged him.

Then, Dazai heard their words.

"sorry" "poor kids, poor Oda, poor everyone" "if only I can"

"I am so sorry, Dazai... So sorry... Oda was a good person. And I believe, that you can be a good person too"

Dazai feels something wet on his shoulder.

[In reality, your tears drop on LN's pages.]

Dazai was stunned. They were so human... They are real. Not in this world, but they are real.

They treat him, and others, as humans.

Dazai try to look up at the figure of light. You were there. You were with him during his past. You did not to enjoy his suffering. But to be with him. To support him.

And now, you, just as Oda, were a sigh of a better future.

The emotions, the sympathy. He wished, he would be near you.

He will gather others. All of them will come to your world.

Dazai whispers: "Guiding Light... My Dear Guiding Light. Don't be afraid. With us by your side, you will never be in danger. You will always be happy."

To be with you. To someone so human and understanding.

Because near you, he feels that he is a real human being.

Few days after, time resets again.

And Dazai, once again, was floating down the river, right before Atsushi saved him.

__________

🪢🦀 When Dazai was sure, that all ADA liked you, he proposed to start searching for a way to your world.

🪢🦀 Dazai was the one, who proposed to create The Union.

🪢🦀 Dazai will make sure, that all people, who joins them, likes Their Dear Guiding Light. He won't let anyone lay a finger on them. He will train Atsushi and Akutagawa to be your bodyguards.

🪢🦀 The Union creation was a success. But they still haven't found a way to your world.

But then, one day, the purple moon shined above Yokohama.

_____________________

When you installed BSD Mayoi Inu Kaikitan

🪢🦀 All Dazai cards have passive talents, that will be activated when marble destroy one orb.

"Poor Dazai, have to lay on newspaper, until I raise Sofa's level enough"

"Tengu Dazai look so pretty!"

"Year of the Tiger animation is so cute!"

🪢🦀 Dazai likes, when you're using his cards.

🪢🦀 Dazai will rig the event scouts, so you will get his cards first.

🪢🦀 Rigged Chuuya's Birthday Scout, so you will get anyone, but Chuuya.

🪢🦀 It failed, because, Chuuya send you his cards in Gift Box.

🪢🦀 When you got Oda's SSR card from scout, and Oda appeared in the ADA office, well and alive (just a little dizzy), Dazai was ready to simply knock out the screen of your phone and hoped, that he will get into your world. At that moment, he wanted to embrace you and never let go.

🪢🦀 When BSD characters gain access to the rest of your phone, Dazai will often browse the Internet with you.

🪢🦀 Doesn't matter, what you are looking at, he just keeps you company.

🪢🦀 Won't let you leave likes under dog's photos and videos.

🪢🦀 He is waiting for the day, when they came to your world.

🪢🦀 He will make sure, that your life will be happy.

__________

You noticed another notification from The Gift Box.

Another note with new SSR card. Of Dazai and Oda playing poker. There was a strange light blob floating above them.

"[Y/N], dear, thank you for bringing Oda back. Thank you for been near. Lets one day spend time together. You. Me. And Oda. We are waiting for that day. Please, wait for us. Dazai Osamu"

You smile and open the new card. You pet Dazai's sprite.

"I will wait, Dazai. Will be happy to spend time with you and Oda."

You didn't notice, that Dazai's sprite looked at you. And that his mouth was moving. And, of course, you couldn't hear his words.

"It's a promise, Dear Guiding Light."

#bungou stray dogs au #self-awareau #self-awarebsd #bsd #bsd x gender neutral reader #bungou stray dogs #gender neutral reader #bsd anime #yandere #Self-Aware Dazai Osamu #dazai osamu x reader

[lotus-pear]

Writing a complex character such as Dazai is actually really hard even for people who understand him because he is, as you said, extremely unpredictable. I don't know exactly what to tell you, but I'll try to help a little bit!

The whole thing about Dazai is that he doesn't understand humanity. He understands the basics and why people do what they do because he is analytical and has been studying people's behavior and human connections forever. But he doesn't feel connected with humanity and empathy the same way other people do. He perceives others from like, the other side of a barrier. He studies them carefully. Manages to care about them deeply sometimes. Even deeper when they're able to see him and get to him (Odasaku, Atsushi, Chuuya, the whole agency in fact means something to him). But there's always this layer of disconnection and apathy and emptiness he doesn't know how to get rid of. It's like he cares, but he actually doesn't because he rationalizes everything and turns it into a game of chess, more or less? And I think that frustrates him. He isn't used to caring about people because he doesn't understand them, but he takes an interest in the people he finds amusing to study and once he cares deeply, they're taken away from him (that's why he mourns and regrets Oda's death so much. He feels like the world takes everything away from him the second he manages to feel human). Hence the whole thing about not feeling human (amongst other things). He cares and yet he is realistic. He has regrets and suffers and feels pain and he can care about others (ignore all the people who keep portraying him as an emotionless monster, please) but he doesn't drown in self-pity when it comes to all the people he has killed and his past because he can rationalize that. It was another era. He has moved on. And if it's for the greater good of the mission or his journey to find something to live for, he doesn't care how many random people he has to kill (when he was younger he valued other people's lives way less, of course. Now that has changed because his apathy is something he doesn't turn into cruelty and instead uses to rationalize plans and help the world and the agency. Basically, when he was part of the mafia it was kind of "I don't give a fuck about random people" because he genuinely didn't feel anything for them, but now, even if he doesn't genuinely care for them, he protects even random people because that's what the image of kindness Oda had planned for him). Oda tells him that, if the good side and the bad one are the same and he hasn't found anything to live for yet, why not help the world while he's at it? And it's such a beautiful thought because Dazai has this issue with understanding humanity and making bonds. But he understands, now more than ever after Oda's death, what living and killing means. He might not actually care that much for society and its well-being, but maybe he can find something to live for in the light more than he would in the darkness. He keeps wanting to kill himself, right? He keeps trying. But he doesn't actually want to. It's common sense. If he truly wanted to, he already would've done it. "I don't like pain" is the most common thing to say when you don't actually want to do it. I think that, unlike Nikolai, who actually craves to die as a representation of freedom, Dazai only wants to keep trying and trying to find a reason for living. Chuuya was that thing when he was in the Mafia. Chuuya and Oda, because Chuuya is quite literally his soulmate (in the sense of bringing amusement to his life and also making him feel human, as his ability is the only thing that can help Chuuya. And also Chuuya not being human but being the most empathetic and emotional of all the people Dazai has met in the mafia) and Oda was the first one to actually understand him and see him for who he is, something I don't think he'll ever find again and that's why Oda's death fucked him up so bad. He found a place to belong and somebody to live for, and then he dies and leaves him alone? It's not fair, but he'll try to fight for good and live in the light if that's what Oda wanted for him. As if Oda knew him better than he knows himself because I also think he has a hard time with his own perception and personality.

In simpler words: Dazai has a hard time understanding humanity because he feels disconnected from it by a layer of apathy and the fact that he doesn't understand basic human needs/actions because he doesn't share them. One of the things that makes us human is desires, right? Wanting. Loving. Longing. Dazai rejects all of that because he doesn't know what he wants and nothing he tries ends up making him feel whole. In "No Longer Human", actually, you can read things like "It is almost impossible for me to converse with other people" and "I have never known what it means to be hungry / Eat or die, the saying goes, but to my ears, it sounded like just one more unpleasant threat". So he isn't a monster, his brain just functions in a different way. He sees everything. Analyzes every little thing. He's smarter than everybody else and he's aware of that, but he feels lonely there and only wants somebody to understand or something to fight for. Oda gave him both things, and the agency gave him a reason to keep going because he genuinely cares about doing good and keeping them safe. I don't think Dazai's journey has ended, because he still fights against.... So many things with himself. His past. His future. His desires. But at least now he has a thing to enjoy and bring him happiness. His constant act of being "silly" isn't that much of a facade. I mean, I think it is because if he acts like a clown, nobody will ever see the true self he hides. But I think he ends up having fun with the agency and annoying Chuuya because he sees them respond to his behavior and he finds it amusing. I think being extremely smart and lonely and tormented can coexist with being fun sometimes.

As per writing in his POV.... It depends on what you want to write, really. I think his brain functions differently depending on his mood. I guess the most important thing is to keep in mind his surroundings because he's always hyperaware of every little thing. But it frustrates him not knowing how he's feeling or not understanding what he actually truly needs, often focusing on others instead of looking into himself, because every time he does, he only finds himself empty and craving for something he doesn't know what it is. In his worst moments, I think it's quite obvious he tries to fix things with distractions and impulsive actions like substance abuse. In his more analytical moments, it's when he becomes more apathetic and sees the world as his game of chess and people as only pawns. He knows he's human, he just doesn't feel like it. Fyodor has a sense of superiority Dazai doesn't share. He's smarter because his brain functions differently, but he is no God. He is no entity. He analyzes from the POV of somebody external to humanity but knowing quite well he isn't God. And when he's having genuine fun and feeling some type of care/love? I think he's grateful. The emptiness is always there, though. Always haunting him. In the back of his brain. But he sees hope in Atsushi and a place to keep his promise in the agency and maybe fulfill his heart. He might always have a fucked up perception of himself, but at least he's aware that doing the right thing fills the hole in his chest more than tormenting others. As I said, he likes it there (and Chuuya) because it makes him experience humanity even if he keeps telling himself he isn't human (No Longer Human quote: "You miss her, don't you?" / "Yes." / "That's human nature, I guess").

I don't know if I helped you?? I think it's a bit of a mess, sorry 😭 It's like 3am and I don't know if what I said makes any sense, but I really hope I was able to help you!

holy FUCK it took me fifteen minutes to read all of this and i'm glad i did because this is the most succinct and articulate analysis i have ever seen of dazai's underlying nature and his ambitions in relevance to the plot OP I THINK IF ASIGIRI CANT WRITE ANYMORE YOU SHOULD TAKE OVER BSD MANGA BC I THINK U UNDERSTAND DAZAI BETTER THAN HE DOES SOMETIMES TBH💀💀 aaaa jkjk i digress you were so real for bringing up the yozo/dazai parallels bc there's genuinely so many and if i still had my fucking BOOK :side eye: i could go through the intricate and profound commentary i left in the margins but alas my dear friend insists on keeping it longer. there's nothing more i can say on this topic bc i agree w you on everything wholeheartedly i think you deserve a scholarship to harvard or smth bc god DAMN you would slay as a lit or lang major

#one more thing i will add is dazai's inherently selfish nature in the mafia which he lashes out against due to oda's last words #bc he rly DID only care abt his own interests and wouldn't take action unless he reaped mutual benefit #massive slay when he entered his redemption arc good for him good for him #anyway TY FOR THE ANALYSIS U ARE THE BEST MWAH MWAH💞💞💞 #best ask i've received EVER <333333333 #lotus’s asks

[ech0schamber]

i hope your injury gets better asap!! but as for requests,, how about dazai/ranpo reacting to you waking up after being in a coma for a year(s)?

awhh, thank you :] and sorry this took so long, i totally forgot to check my computer lmao

and damn, jumping straight into the angst lets go

☆i just had to use this gif i couldn't find the one from oda's scene

☆ANYWAYS

☆you had been on a mission with dazai when you got severely injured, he had tried to get you out of the area and to a hospital as fast as he could, but you still went into a coma due to your injuries

☆he had tried his hardest to stay stronger for you, but as soon as he was told that you were in a coma and that the doctors had no idea when you were going to wake up, he immediately wanted to sob his eyes out

☆he got incredibly drunk that night

☆for the first couple of months, he visited you every day. even if it meant that he left work early to see you. for once, kunikida never scolded him about it

☆eventually, he stopped visiting as frequently. it went from everyday, to every couple of days, to maybe once a week. it got to the point that he would only visit you a handful of times every mouth. the longer you were there, the more and more hope he lost

☆during this time, his alcoholic tendencies got worse, he ended up hurting himself more, even his suicide attempts got worse and more frequent. everyone at the agency started to look after him, hell, even chuuya started to look after him

☆you had finally woke up from your coma, and you immediately asked where dazai was. once the doctors checked your vitals and made sure you weren't at risk for falling into another coma, they had called dazai to tell him

☆he was at the agency when they called, now normally, he wouldn't answer his phone, but he had saved the number of the hospital just in case

☆he almost broke down as soon as he heard that you were awake. he basically ran out of the agency, much to kunikida's dislike. (he understands once he finds out your awake though)

☆it took him like 10 minutes to get to the hospital bc his lanky ass ran the whole way there

☆the second that he walked into the hospital room and saw that you truly had woken up, the tears immediately started falling. he hugged you and sobbed into your shoulder for almost an hour before he could calm himself down

☆thankfully, the doctors had informed you that you were in a coma for over a year, so you didn't freak out when this happened

☆you had held him tightly the whole time, whispering reassuring and comforting comments to him the whole time

☆once he had finally fully calmed down, he gave you a big ol' smooch

☆he took a second to text kunikida to give him the news, and to ask for the next few days off, dazai was not going to leave your side. if the hospital staff wasn't willing to let him stay, they would probably have to drag his ass out of the hospital

☆but, for the sake of my sanity, the doctors were nice and let him stay :]

☆now, after being in a coma for that long, your muscle start to weaken and basically give out on themselves. i mean, you were stuck in one position for over a year, that to be expected. you are going to be stuck in a wheelchair for a while, your legs can't carry your weight anymore

☆dazai was very willing to help you with your physical therapy, he basically moved himself into your apartment to help you. he'd even leave in the middle of work if you called him stating you needed help with something

☆jumping forward a bit, you're on crutches now, and can walk around your apartment without much help now

☆now that dazai's head had finally fully processed that you were awake, he'd become clingy as fuck. he wanted to cling to you earlier, but he was terrified of accidentally hurting you

☆you got yourself a human koala now, congrats ;]

☆he is going to get possessive of you, he lost you for a year, he is not going to let you out of his sight for a long time. don't even think about trying to go onto a dangerous mission, he will trap you, and threaten his co-workers if they try to assign you a mission they know is dangerous. you are probably going to have to reel it in a bit, he can get very possessive at times, but it is because he is absolutely terrified that you are going to get injured and he won't be able to save you

☆please comfort him, he needs a lot of love after that

☆ohhh this poor baby

☆he knew that you were going to get hurt by taking this mission, and he told you that. you still went, ignoring his warning. he did not know that you were going to be sent into a coma due to your injuries

☆he, of course, stayed back at the agency, his job doesn't intel mission work like yours does, but he knew something was very wrong when you didn't come back when you supposed to

☆he was contacted by the hospital, as he was your emergency contact. he was absolutely devastated by the news. for once, he just quietly left. he didn't even tell fukuzawa what was happening, he only found out later when yosano had reported back to everyone.

☆he didn't go to the hospital immediately. instead, he went home and bawled his eyes out. he didn't know what to do, and it honestly made him fill like a lost child again

☆he visited you everyday. he didn't care if you didn't wake up from the coma, he would still visit you every single day

☆he cried. a lot. it ended up taking a toll on his mental health, everyone at the agency had noticed and started caring for him in your absence, he even ended up staying at fukuzawa's place several times bc he couldn't bear the thought of going home alone

☆anytime his phone went off, he'd immediately checked it to see if it was the hospital calling

☆when the hospital did finally call though? he shot out of the agency at lightning speed, his beloved was finally awake and he was not going to let them be alone for very long

☆he quite literally threw himself onto you when he finally saw you. the doctors were not to pleased by this, but neither of you cared

☆he cried into your shoulder for the longest time, clinging onto you as he was afraid that you would disappear into thin air if he let go of you, so there is no way he didn't stay with basically the whole time you were in the hospital

☆he'd also be very willing to help you with physical therapy! and he'd make sure you'd eat properly, you probably lost a lot of weight

☆literally made a rule that if he tells you not to go on a mission, you don't go on that mission. like, no one at the agency would let you leave for said mission, even fukuzawa wouldn't assign you cases if ranpo said that you were going to get hurt on them

☆get ready for possessive ranpo, he is going to make sure that will never happen again

☆will literally ask yosano to go kill a bitch if they lay their hands on you

----

while you can request angst headcanons as much as you want, please be aware that they are not going to be first priority! while i absolutely love writing angsty stuff, it's not always gonna be easy for me to do so

please don't let that stop you from requesting! i love to see all your ideas!

#bsd x reader #bungou stray dogs x reader #dazai x reader #dazai osamu x reader #ranpo x reader #ranpo edogawa

[rashoumon-homo]

The Bar Lupin (Dazai x Reader)

Dazai x Male Reader, SFW

-> Content Warnings: alcohol mention, hurt/comfort, grief, anxiety attacks, happy ending

-> 1.2k words

Author’s Note: long time no see! I just finished up my class the other day so now I have more free time to write, yay! This one is super tame, but I do have a NSFW Atsushi x Reader in the works so you’ll get your smut fix soon!

Request sent by @suru1990 - enjoy!

♡ ♡ ♡

Ever since Oda’s death, Dazai had avoided the Bar Lupin. It just felt too sentimental, like a holy place that would be tainted if he were to step over the threshold. There were too many memories tied up there. Ones where he was truly happy, which felt somehow worse to dwell on than the more traumatic memories did. When he was in hiding after leaving the Port Mafia, he had a reasonable enough excuse to avoid the place. After all, it was a place he had visited frequently and the Mafia was sure to look for him there. But then the years passed and he joined the Armed Detective Agency and settled in. The Port Mafia knew where he was and didn’t care anymore. He couldn’t lie to himself anymore about his reasons for staying away from the Bar Lupin.

Dazai made a habit of visiting Oda’s grave every year on the anniversary of his death. He’d just sit there in silence, leaning back against the gravestone while dappled sunlight shone on them both through the tree above. Sometimes he’d talk, but mostly he’d sit there quietly. He also had a ritual for spending Oda’s birthdays- getting blackout drunk on whiskey and sake and subsequently calling in sick to work for the next several days to sleep off the hangover. He jokingly called it a “hard reset” but his coworkers exchanged glances rather than laughing when he did.

He and Oda and Ango used to all spend each other’s birthdays at the Bar Lupin, laughing together about who knows what. It was on one of those birthdays that he’d tried whiskey for the first time.

It had now been four years since Oda had celebrated a birthday. Dazai tried not to think about those memories, but they rose to the top of his head like ramune bubbles, determined to resurface. He’d been fighting them all day. Now alone in his room, the weight of them made his chest and throat feel tight, so he threw back yet another cup of sake. And maybe his nose was tingling a little, like it does before he cries, but he was decidedly not drunk enough to deal with that. So he pulled on his coat and went for a walk to clear his head.

Turns out his half-drunk, emotional mind was a bitch. He stood outside the front door of the Bar Lupin, grinding his teeth. He felt so goddamn stupid for being afraid of a building. A building! He was an ex-mafioso. He’d seen hundreds, maybe thousands of people die in front of him in the most gruesome ways. And yet the ghosts of memories had the power to scare him away from the place for years. He was sick of it. His eyes pricked with tears and that was enough to push him forward, opening the door.

As Dazai walked down the stairs, he was surprised to see that the inside of the bar was nearly identical to the last time he’d been there. The decor was the same as always; the soft music just as he remembered. The calico cat that used to hang around was curled up on one of the barstools, sleeping. Even the smell was the same - it was like stepping back in time.

Dazai glanced down the row of barstools and froze. There you were, sitting in Oda’s usual seat. You were about the same height and wearing a similar trench coat, and for a horrifying moment, he thought you were Oda. Startled, he stumbled backwards, bumping into the wall with a muffled thump. You looked over in surprise, but the attention was lost in the haze of adrenaline and humiliation clouding Dazai’s perception.

It wasn’t Oda. Of course it wasn’t. How fucking stupid could he be? Tears sprung to Dazai’s eyes and he swallowed thickly. God, he hated crying.

You stood up and started walking over.

“Stay back!” Dazai warned, flinching away as he saw you approach. He felt the air shift as you crouched down beside him.

“Here, take this,” you said.

He hesitantly lifted his head, gaze flitting to your yellow converse - definitely not something Oda would have worn. He glanced further up, to the handkerchief in your extended hand. Your eyes were softened with concern, but not pity. At least there was that. He took the handkerchief.

You sat on the ground beside him and leaned against the wall, then closed your eyes. “Slow, deep breaths,” you said. “In for 4…” You demonstrated for him, not caring whether he was actually paying attention. “Then hold for 4,” you continued. “Out for four…” You let your breath out slowly through your mouth. “And hold for another 4.” You peeked over at him and were pleased to see him breathing along with you.

The two of you sat there, breathing calmly, for the next few minutes.

Dazai shifted and ran his fingers through his hair. “Thanks,” he said quietly.

“Doing better now?” you asked.

He finally looked you in the face and wow he had the most beautiful brown eyes you’d ever seen. And long eyelashes that glistened with tears. His nose was a bit red, and his eyes still looked puffy, but somehow the vulnerability was attractive in itself.

“Can I buy you a drink?” he asked finally. He blushed, then quickly added, “To repay you for helping me.”

You smiled and stood up, then held out your hand to help him to his feet. “I’d like that,” you said.

Now that he looked closer, Dazai could see the hint of a tattoo just under your collar. And the hand you’d extended to help him up was covered in rings, your nails coated in chipped black nail polish. When you smiled at him, it was wide and genuine and a little crooked. You were nothing like Oda.

“Actually,” Dazai said suddenly, “maybe we can get coffee instead? I’ve already had a bit to drink and this place just doesn’t feel right anymore.”

“Um… sure!” you said, warming up to the idea. “I’m new to the area, so maybe you can show me around on the way!”

As the two of you chattered together and walked up the stairs, Dazai couldn’t help but feel lighter. Somehow, that was all the closure he needed. He was looking towards the future now; not giving the past any more weight than it deserved.

Dazai sneakily grabbed your hand as you walked through the front door, smiling to himself as you blushed into the collar of your coat. “You blushing?” he teased.

“It’s cold out!” you insisted, only turning pinker. He laughed at you and the two of you started down the sidewalk. After a few seconds, he spoke again.

“I’m glad I met you,” he said. “Feels like fate or something.” His tone made it hard to tell if he was being genuine or just messing around, but he wouldn’t meet your eyes when he said it.

“Hmm… I think it’s a bit early to say for sure,” you said playfully. “But I’m glad I met you too.” You squeezed his hand and smiled at him. The two of you turned the corner and the sign for the bar was out of sight.

♡ ♡ ♡

Tag list: @suru1990, @little-miss-chaoss

If you want to join the tag list, send me a dm!

Back to Masterlist

#rashoumon writes #dazai x reader #dazai x you #dazai x y/n #bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd dazai #dazai bsd #dazai x male reader #dazai x m!reader #dazai x gender neutral reader #dazai x gn!reader #bsd x reader #bsd x y/n #bsd x you #bsd x male reader #reader insert

[starlightshadowsworld]

Fyodor's nickname being the Demon and Dazai's having been the Demon Prodigy.

Implying that Fyodor is more darker than Dazai ever could be.

Did the Demon Prodigy committ unspeakable crimes? Yes.

Did the Demon Prodigy use those around him like tools? Kill without a conscious and cause untold suffering to others? Yes.

But the Demon Prodigy also let Ango go. He let a traitor go and told him he wasn't mad.

The Demon Prodigy looked Chuuya Nakahara in the eye, a kid he (allegedly) hates. And told him he's undoubtedly human.

Even when Dazai was at his most darkest, there was light within him. Kindness, there were lines he drew in the sand and wouldn't cross.

It funnily enough made him more dangerous than Fyodor, because it made him unable to be controlled, harder to predict.

Befriending Oda wouldn't make sense to Fyodor.

Maybe in his old days he'd be worth something. But he's a retired killer, lowest on the food chain. But Dazai has always valued him greatly.

He's always had the capability to see people as more than pawns and pieces, which Fyodor can't.

Fyodor can't trust something he can't control while Dazai trusts the Agency and Chuuya with his life.

Even if he doesn't know what's going on or the one pulling the strings.

And if there wasn't light in Dazai, why would Mori try to so hard to destroy it? The irony being it only pushed him further into the light.

When Dazai tries to predict where Fyodor's hidden the Cannabalism ability user. He says "because that's what I would do" as a justification for his decisions.

But he was wrong.

Dazai can trick Fyodor into thinking they are like minded souls. Dazai can even trick himself into thinking they are like minded souls.

But they aren't.

It's why Chuuya trusts him. It's why Kunikida trusts him, it's why Atsushi trusts him and the rest of the Agency.

Because they know him.

It's why Ranpo thinks of the worst thing he could become and the one he pictures is Fyodor.

Dazai isn't perfect.

He's flawed and as human as they come.

But even at his worst, he was always the Prodigy of the Demon.

Never it's final form.

#bsd fyodor #bsd dostoevsky #dazai osamu #bsd dazai #bsd chuuya #bsd ango #bsd odasaku #bsd atsushi #bsd #bungou stray dogs

[anqelically-archived]

goodbye, my darling | osamu dazai x fem!reader

word count: 2.8k

content: beast!au spoilers, angst, you take oda’s place (but aren’t exactly like him)

navigation | bsd masterlist

you were never too keen on the idea of meeting someone whose face you’d never seen. as a cautious woman, who also worked as a detective for a living, you’d normally deny a meeting with someone unfamiliar. however, to deny a gathering in your current situation could cost the life of a boy you took in as a subordinate.

the lives of those younger than you were of the utmost importance.

ryunosuke akutagawa was your subordinate, who, blindly, stormed into the headquarters of the most dangerous organization in yokohama. in order to save his little sister, akutagawa broke into the port mafia’s building by himself to get her back.

since he was a member of the agency, it was part of your mission to rescue him. as you walked towards a lone bar in ginza, you never forgot that. a cigarette burned away in your dominant hand as you walked towards bar lupin.

your aim was to aid akutagawa in what would happen after his escape from the port mafia. the reason you were meeting with the person in charge of monetary security for the mafia was to gain information. with a threat dangerous to the port mafia, a bargain can be made. the akutagawas can be safe from the port mafia, and the port mafia can be safe from the government.

the cigarette in your hand was put out when you rubbed it against the brick wall. you threw the unfinished product into the trashcan nearby before you took quiet steps down the stairs toward the bar. you were sure it was the location based on the sign outside.

the moment you opened the door, the mellow, low tune of jazz reached your ears. your (e/c) eyes scanned the almost empty bar in front of you. at the actual bar itself sat one lone man. from his stature, he was definitely not the old man you were expecting.

his hair, dark as coffee beans, covered his face before he turned around. a smile adorned the unfamiliar man’s face as he looked at you with a shine in his rich, brown eye. the other one seemed to be wrapped in bandages, just like the ends of his arms. he was handsome if you had to say. but for someone dressed like a port mafia hitman, he greeted you like you knew each other well.

“(n/n), it’s been a while,” he spoke, voice soft. “were you smoking again? i can smell the stench from a mile away, you know.”

“i suppose it’s not unusual for you to smell it,” you responded. “but you say it’s been a while... have we met before?”

the man closed his eye, an almost silent sigh escaping his mouth. once you could see his uncovered eye again, the shine that was once there seemed to dull. it was still there, but harder for you to see in the dimly lit bar. he pushed down the sphere of ice in his drink.

“no, we haven’t met yet. this is the first time. the first time i’ve entered this bar, first time i drank here, first time we’ve met here, in this crazy world. a whole lotta firsts, wouldn’t you say, (n/n)?”

“yeah, it’s a lot.”

you found yourself sitting one stool away from the man. a bittersweet silence was draped between the two of you and for some reason, you felt the urge to change it as soon as possible. you wanted to fall into a light conversation you’d normally have with someone close to you. it was odd, really. you were here for a purpose, yet you sat by idly.

“hey, i’ve got a question.” if the man wasn’t going to speak first, you would. you asked, “if we’re going to sit here, what should i call you? i doubt you’d want me to call you mister bandages.”

“well, calling me yours would be just fine,” he playfully smirked at you. “darling wouldn’t be bad either.”

“so it’s going to be like that?”

“of course it is. i have a nickname for you, and you have one for me. it’s only fair, isn’t it? but, i have a question for you. if we’re going to be here, what would you like to drink? pick your poison, belladonna.”

you let your chin rest on your hand, “well, i usually only drink with my coworkers and when i’m tired. i always have a lime margarita, if you can make that for me, darling.”

he smiled as he went behind the bar, “hm, i suppose i can make it. but since you’re here with me for the first time, how about we drink something else for the first time too? i can make a mean french martini, surprisingly. i’ve watched it get made plenty of times.”

“if you insist, go ahead. if it tastes bad, don’t be surprised when i give you 0 stars.”

“ouch, how low.”

dazai, to your surprise, began to create the drink as if he knew the bar like the back of his hand. he grabbed the right drinks from their respective places without even looking at the labels to create the cocktail. it was as if the bar was his.

while he was at it, you asked him something that had been bothering you from the moment he first talked. “you called me (n/n) when i entered the bar, so it’s safe to say that it refers to me. why call me that?”

“why?” he hummed. “i should ask you that. do you not like it?”

“it doesn’t bother me in the slightest. it’s just… no one has ever called me that before. everyone just calls me (y/n), but not you, clearly.”

he lowered his gaze and the corners of his lips turned up. that smile of his, you could read it clear as day. you were able to tell that this man wasn’t smiling from what you've said, not even genuinely smiling. he smiled for the sake of himself. you didn’t know what he was thinking or feeling, but you were sure it had to do with yourself. there was no way it didn’t.

“and no one’s ever called me their darling until you have, (n/n). it’s another first for the both of us, and we did it together. but hey, i have some stories i’ve been living to tell you. can i?”

after giving him the go-ahead, he excitedly talked about dealing with a bomb and giving his underlings firm tofu. the way he told his stories was like a little child coming home from the first day of school and telling their parents about their new friends.

once he was done, he slid the drink right in front of you and took a seat. however, it was not the seat he was originally at when you walked into the bar. getting closer than he was, he sat on the stool to your left. he held up his drink and, as if it were engraved into your body, you clinked your glass against his without a thought.

“well go ahead, taste it! let’s see if it really is worth 0 stars,” he urged you.

the way he stared into your eyes with anticipation, it was another strange thing you’ve noticed. he was genuinely happy. he was probably the strangest person you’ve ever met, and you’ve met some odd people. hell, you worked with them.

after having a thought, you picked up the glass. you pressed it against your lips and took a sip, aware of the eye on you. once you swallowed and set the drink down, you could see a satisfied smile in your peripheral vision.

“good, huh?” the brunette asked.

“it really is,” you confirmed. “it's not worth 0 stars.”

“see? what did i tell you, belladonna? a french martini suits you, though. you can always ask me to make you some if you want.”

“maybe. i’d ask if you can cook as well, but your firm tofu says otherwise.”

he chuckled, “yeah, i’m not much of a cook. i always had someone else cook for me. it was edible too. she was much better than i was at cooking. at a lot of things, actually.”

“she seems like a woman of talent.”

“that’s right, she was. i’ve missed her… i’ve missed her a lot these past years.”

“a mother?”

“nope, my mom had been long gone from my life. this woman… she was much more than that.”

you couldn’t find anything else to say, so you remained quiet. that was, until the bandage-wearing man brought up why you two even decided to meet in the first place. he asked for more details.

“a subordinate of mine is in danger, and i want to cut a deal. it’d be a miracle if he came out in one piece, let alone with the person he’s been searching for. if he makes it out, i have no doubt that the port mafia will hunt him down. i want to cut a deal that’ll benefit us both.”

after contemplating, he murmured, “akutagawa’s lucky to have come across a good teacher like you.”

“excuse me?”

“you don’t need to worry about akutagawa. after today, the mafia will never lay another finger on him. there’s no catch; he’ll be able to live the rest of his life in peace... besides, this is what i’ve had planned since the beginning... if he makes it out of the mafia headquarters alive, that is.”

what he told you had confirmed your suspicions. taking another sip of the martini, you looked him straight in the eye. you’ve let yourself come off as laid back, but now your expression was stern. he was caught off-guard.

“tell me, why did you lure him? why did you lure akutagawa into your headquarters, osamu dazai?”

it went silent, so much so that the music didn’t reach either of your ears.

“guess you’ve figured it out. i can’t fool you, can i?” he quipped. “you’ve always been quite intelligent.”

“you’re the one who gave out the hints. when talking about the tofu, you talked about underlings. you spoke like you had a lot of them. then, you talked about akutagawa without me even saying his name. not to mention how you’ve had plans from the beginning. only the port mafia’s boss would know, and be able to plan much. you’re the reason akutagawa is searching for his sister in the first place. this is over.”

“no, wait-!”

dazai reached out his arm, but he halted at the familiar click of a gun. his eye widened and he could only look at you with a horrified expression. he didn’t even have to look down to know your trusty pistol was in your hand.

“please put the gun away,” dazai begged, his face contorting to an expression of sorrow.

“i’m sorry, but i’m afraid i can’t do that. if i do, who knows what’ll happen to me? but then again, i’m already screwed if this is a trap. the port mafia’s boss is cunning, so i’m done acting like we’re close.”

“i didn’t want to become the boss! i… and i didn’t think of it as an act, not at all. it’s the truth, i swear.”

he looked at you so sincerely that you almost dropped the gun from your side. raw emotion was behind his words, or so you thought. maybe he could still be lying to you? maybe lying to himself. after all, there are liars so good that they’ve deceived themselves.

you looked down at your lap, “i guess that i’ve got to come up with another plan for saving akutagawa. well, if i can leave this establishment alive, that is.”

dazai insisted, “this isn’t a trap. i would never even dream of doing something like that to you, (n/n).”

“my name is (l/n) (y/n), not (n/n).”

your words were another shot to his chest.

“right, (y/n). you asked me why i lured akutagawa to the mafia headquarters, right? well, i did it to protect this world.”

you raised a brow, “this world?”

“this is but one of countless worlds. and in another world, the original world, you and i were… we were—“

“i love you,” he recalls the light touch of your fingers burning up his skin, “and there’s nothing in any universe that would change that.”

“—we were friends. you and i were friends in the original world. we drank at this bar and spent time together talking about the most insignificant things. it lasted for a while.”

dazai can also remember your last moments. you were laying in your own pool of blood when he finally caught up to you. when you spoke to him, you spoke in that same calm voice you’ve always had. and then, the smoke of the cigarette in your hand had dissipated into nothing, just like the light in your eyes.

“even if that were true, that doesn’t change what you did to akutagawa and his sister. you separated them, and now here we are,” you reminded dazai. “we may have been close in the original world, as you call it, but we are enemies now.”

“i love you—“

dazai’s eyes searched for something in the air that wasn’t there. his eye darted around, and his lips would slightly part and shut after a few seconds. his face twisted as he continued to remember everything.

“—and there’s nothing in any universe that would change that.”

“it was hard... it was really hard fighting mimic without you in the organization. i had no choice but to take over for mori and make enemies of everyone around me to expand the business,” dazai finally looked back at you. slowly, his hands reached for your cheeks. “everything i did was for this world’s- for you. i needed a world where you can sit here, happy with the people around you again.”

for a reason you couldn’t decipher, the hand that held your gun began to tremble. well, maybe it had been trembling for a long time and you were only now just recognizing it. dazai’s hands, cold and soft at the touch, held your face as if you were the most delicate thing in the world.

it was a touch of a lover.

coming down to that conclusion, everything made sense to you. dazai always looked at you like you were closest thing to him, a lifeline if you may. his nicknames, the flirting, talking about this unnamed important woman in his life. it was all because...

“we were in a relationship, weren’t we?”

dazai would’ve missed your words if the proximity between the two of you wasn’t this close. the way he froze in his spot had answered enough, and you could only sigh. slowly, you put your gun back into your jacket and rested your hands on dazai’s.

you gently pried his hands off of your face and held them between your own. you felt no specific feelings from the action, but you were sure dazai did based off of how his face softened.

“i’m sorry, but you have to leave your feelings out of this. i don’t know how you know what happened in the original world, and i won’t ask. i just have to tell you that i don’t feel what you do. like i said, you and i are enemies here. as long as you control the port mafia and i’m part of the armed detective agency, it’ll remain this way.”

“there’s nothing in any universe that would change that.”

“i see,” dazai took his hands back and rested them on his lap. “well, the reason i invited you here in the first place was to say goodbye.”

“you really don’t plan on ever seeing me again?”

“you said it, didn’t you? we’re enemies as long as we’re associated with the organizations we’re in. so after today, i won’t see you again. it’ll only hurt more if i do.”

“then this makes this a goodbye,” you watched as he stood up from his stool, hands in the pockets of his black overcoat.

“yes, it does. a life with someone you can say goodbye to is a good life, especially when it hurts so much to say it to them. am i wrong?”

“i guess you wouldn’t be... i haven’t said goodbye to anyone and have it pain me,” you replied, feeling bad for the port mafia’s boss.

“i hope you don’t for a long time. but one day, that time will come. you won’t be prepared for it, but all i can tell you is to let it in. feel everything, and see where it takes you.” dazai faintly smiled before he turned his back to you and began to walk away, “goodbye, (n/n).”

“goodbye, my darling.”

painfully, dazai grit his teeth and resisted the urge to look back. in goodbyes, that’s what they always do. they turn around and crash into the person they’re supposed to be leaving. he didn’t want to do that. this was his goodbye to you, even if it didn’t mean much. if he was going to keep this world functioning, he won’t leave it with you in any pain.

‘be happy, okay? even if it’s without me, be happy. as long as you’re alive, somewhere, i’ll be happy too’

it was a final thought he kept to himself.

note: this pained me sm to write, but i had to for the sake of my imagination </3

please reblog for more!

#bungou stray dogs x reader #bungo stray dogs x reader #bsd x reader #dazai x reader #osamu dazai x reader #dazai osamu x reader #dazai #bsd beast #bungo stray dogs #bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs beast #bsd manga #osamu dazai #dazai osamu #angst #bsd angst #aqwriting

[awoogayanderes]

WHO DOES MY HEART STAY WITH ?

➪ request : “what would be the last reader's reaction when dazai left the mafia? Would she stay with aku and mourn or would she go with him?” - anonymous

➪ other notes : this is kinda not a request but i loved the idea of it so i’ll give you both options, anon is also talking about “our hearts are never meant to be”

SCENARIO ONE : BETRAYING THE MAFIA AND LEAVING WITH DAZAI

you stared at dazai as he held his hand out, waiting for you to accompany him. he wouldn’t leave you, he wasn’t capable to. he explained what happened and what he planned to do in order to honor oda’s last wish. “are you ready to accept your consequences?” you asked looking at him in his eyes. “yes, i’m ready,” and with that you took his hand, officially leaving the one home you had, the port mafia.

when akutagawa found out that not only his mentor but you also betrayed and fled the mafia, anger and disgust surged through his body. he was angry at you, knowing that you knew you were the first person to show him a dime of kindness. he was disgusted at himself for not being enough for you and dazai, for not being a reason for you to stay. yet he always took any mission against other organizations, hoping that one day he’d see you again.

he does eventually find out that you work for some detective agency along with his old mentor. coincidentally both of you were on a mission against each other yet you can’t help but freeze when you see the young man you previously knew as timid and small. “ryūnosuke,” you say, your voice the same kind of soft as four years ago on that hill. he slowly retracts rashomon when he sees you.

after that, he simply leaves, hatred flowing through his veins as an old feeling starts panging in his heart. he hates you. he hates that you became a better person without a second glimpse at him. he hates how you look at him with pity and sadness in your eyes. the worst part is that there’s nothing he can do to stop craving that kindness you always held. he hates himself for feeling this way towards you.

SCENARIO TWO : STAYING IN THE MAFIA WITH AKUTAGAWA BY YOUR SIDE

you stared at mori frozen as he told you that dazai would no longer be working in the mafia. the older man looked at you condescendingly, your relationship with mori was confusing to say the least, he had warned you about dazai almost immediately after he took you in. yet here you are now, for the first time not smiling in years, dazai actually left..?

you didn’t talk to anyone weeks after that, even the coaxing from chuuya didn’t help. you were in shock, you weren’t sad, you weren’t angry, you were just surprised. you hadn’t seen akutagawa in that while but you wondered how he took it. now sitting on the same hill as the sun rose, blurring out the previous night sky. you felt someone sit next to you on the grass, the same man you sat with months ago.

silence enveloped both of you, but this time it wasn’t comforting, it was suffocating. “i didn’t expect him to leave,” you say breaking the silence. akutagawa stays silent as do you, sharing this quiet moment. betrayal comes easiest from those who you think will stick by you through good and bad. that’s what you learned in the mafia, yet it hurt regardless.

akutagawa keeps to his word, not trying anything on you, but still pining for you, even more now as you rose through ranks. four years later, and you’re still the only person he’s had such feelings for. even if you still look at dazai with admiration the few times you saw him after his betrayal, he won’t hold it against you. he knows he’s only supposed to pine for you, never try anything else. but at least you’re here.

#written by terra #sincerely terra #engraved with hope #engraved with bitterness #bsd #bsd x reader #bsd spoilers #ryūnosuke akutagawa #akutagawa angst #ryūnosuke akutagawa x reader #ryūnosuke akutagawa angst #akutagawa x reader #akutagawa x you

[anqelically]

GOODBYE, MY DARLING | BEAST!OSAMU DAZAI

SUMMARY. you’ve set up a meeting with a member of the port mafia to gain information, yet the man that greets you treats you like an old friend from the past

WARNINGS. fem!reader, 2.8k words, beast!au spoilers, angst, you take oda’s place

NAVI | BSD MASTERLIST

you were never too keen on the idea of meeting someone whose face you’ve never seen. as a cautious woman, who also worked as a detective for a living, you’d normally deny a meeting with someone unfamiliar. however, to deny a gathering in your current situation could cost the life of a boy you took in as a subordinate.

the lives of those younger than you were of the utmost importance.

ryunosuke akutagawa was your subordinate, who, blindly, stormed into the headquarters of the most dangerous organization in yokohama. in order to save his little sister, akutagawa broke into the port mafia’s building by himself to get her back.

since he was a member of the agency, it was part of your mission to rescue him. as you walked towards a lone bar in ginza, you never forgot that. a cigarette burned away in your dominant hand as you walked towards bar lupin.

your aim was to aid akutagawa in what would happen after his escape from the port mafia. the reason you were meeting with the person in charge of of monetary security for the mafia was to gain information. with a threat dangerous to the port mafia, a bargain can be made. the akutagawas can be safe from the port mafia, and the port mafia can be safe from the government.

the cigarette in your hand was put out when you rubbed it against the brick wall. you threw the unfinished product into the trashcan nearby before you took quiet steps down the stairs towards the bar. you were sure it was the location based on the sign outside.

the moment you had opened the door, the mellow, low tune of jazz reached your ears. your e/c eyes scanned the almost empty bar in front of you. at the actual bar itself sat one lone man. from his stature, he was definitely not the old man you were expecting.

his hair, dark as coffee beans, covered his face before he turned around. a smile adorned the unfamiliar man’s face as he looked at you with a shine in his rich, brown eye. the other one seemed to be wrapped in bandages, just like the ends of his arms. he was handsome, if you had to say. but for someone dressed like a port mafia hitman, he greeted you like you knew each other well.

“n/n, it’s been a while,” he spoke, voice soft. “were you smoking again? i can smell the stench from a mile away, you know.”

“i suppose it’s not unusual for you to smell it,” you responded. “but you say it’s been a while... have we met before?”

the man closed his eye, an almost silent sigh escaping his mouth. once you could see his uncovered eye again, the shine that was once there seemed to dull. it was still there, but harder for you to see in the dimly lit bar. he pushed down the sphere of ice in his drink.

“no, we haven’t met yet. this is the first time. the first time i’ve entered this bar, first time i drank here, first time we’ve met here, in this crazy world. a whole lotta firsts, wouldn’t you say, n/n?”

“yeah, it’s a lot.”

you found yourself sitting one stool away from the man. a bittersweet silence was draped amongst the two of you and for some reason, you felt the urge to change it as soon as possible. you wanted to fall into light conversation you’d normally have with someone close to you. it was odd, really. you were here for a purpose, yet you sat by idly.

“hey, i’ve got a question.” if the man wasn’t going to speak first, you would. you asked, “if we’re going to sit here, what should i call you? i doubt you’d want me to call you mister bandages.”

“well, calling me yours would be just fine,” he playfully smirked at you. “darling wouldn’t be bad either.”

“so it’s going to be like that?”

“of course it is. i have a nickname for you, and you have one for me. it’s only fair, isn’t it? but, i have a question for you. if we’re going to be here, what would you like to drink? pick your poison, belladonna.”

you let your chin rest on your hand, “well, i usually only drink with my coworkers and when i’m tired. i always have a lime margarita, if you can make that for me, darling.”

he smiled as he went behind the bar, “hm, i suppose i can make it. but since you’re here with me for the first time, how about we drink something else for the first time too? i can make a mean french martini, surprisingly. i’ve watched it get made plenty of times.”

“if you insist, go ahead. if it tastes bad, don’t be surprised when i give you 0 stars.”

“ouch, how low.”

dazai, to your surprise, began to create the drink as if he knew the bar like the back of his hand. he grabbed the right drinks from their respective places without even looking at the labels to create the cocktail. it was as if the bar was his.

while he was at it, you asked him something that had been bothering you from the moment he first talked. “you called me n/n when i entered the bar, so it’s safe to say that it refers to me. why call me that?”

“why?” he hummed. “i should ask you that. do you not like it?”

“it doesn’t bother me in the slightest. it’s just… no one has ever called me that before. everyone just calls me y/n, but not you, clearly.”

he lowered his gaze and the corners of his lips turned up. that smile of his, you could read it clear as day. you were able to tell that this man wasn’t smiling from what you’ve said, not even genuinely smiling. he smiled for the sake of himself. you didn’t know what he was thinking or feeling, but you were sure it had to do with yourself. there was no way it didn’t.

“and no one’s ever called me their darling until you have, n/n. it’s another first for the both of us, and we did it together. but hey, i have some stories i’ve been living to tell you. can i?”

after giving him the go-ahead, he excitedly talked about dealing with a bomb and giving his underlings firm tofu. the way he told his stories was like a little child coming home from the first day of school and telling their parents about their new friends.

once he was done, he slid the drink right in front of you and took a seat. however, it was not the seat he was originally at when you walked into the bar. getting closer that he was, he sat on the stool to your left. he held up his drink and, as if it were engraved into your body, you clinked your glass against his without a thought.

“well go ahead, taste it! let’s see if it really is worth 0 stars,” he urged you.

the way he stared into your eyes with anticipation, it was another strange thing you’ve noticed. he was genuinely happy. he was probably the strangest person you’ve ever met, and you’ve met some odd people.

after having a thought, you picked up the glass. you pressed it against your lips and took a sip, aware of the eye on you. once you swallowed and set the drink down, you could see a satisfied smile in your peripheral vision.

“good, huh?” the brunette asked.

“it really is,” you confirmed. “not 0 stars.”

“see? what did i tell you, belladonna? a french martini suits you, though. you can always ask me to make you some if you want.”

“maybe. i’d ask if you can cook as well, but your firm tofu says otherwise.”

he chuckled, “yeah, i’m not much of a cook. i always had someone else cook for me. it was edible too. she was much better than i was at cooking. at a lot of things, actually.”

“she seems like a woman of talent.”

“that’s right, she was. i’ve missed her… i’ve missed her a lot these past years.”

“a mother?”

“nope, my mom had been long gone from my life. this woman… she was much more than that.”

you couldn’t find anything else to say, so you remained quiet. that was, until the bandage-wearing man brought up why you two even decided to meet in the first place. he asked for more details.

“a subordinate of mine is in danger, and i want to cut a deal. it’d be a miracle if he came out it one piece, let alone with the person he’s been searching for. if he makes it out, i have no doubt that the port mafia will hunt him down. i want to cut a deal that’ll benefit us both.”

after contemplating, he murmured, “akutagawa’s lucky to have come across a good teacher like you.”

“excuse me?”

“you don’t need to worry about akutagawa. after today, the mafia will never lay another finger on him. there’s no catch; he’ll be able to live the rest of his life in peace... besides, this is what i’ve had planned since the beginning... if he makes it out of the mafia headquarters alive, that is.”

what he told you was was confirmed your suspicions. taking another sip of the martini, you looked him straight in the eye. you’ve let yourself come off as laid back, but now your expression was stern. he was caught off-guard.

“tell me, why did you lure him? why did you lure akutagawa into your headquarters, osamu dazai?”

it went silent, so much so that the music didn’t reach either of your ears.

“guess you’ve figured it out. i can’t fool you, can i?” he quipped. “you’ve always been quite intelligent.”

“you’re the gave out the hints. when talking about the tofu, you talked about underlings. you spoke like you had a lot of them. then, you talked about akutagawa without me even saying his name. not to mention how you’ve had plans from the beginning. only the port mafia’s boss would know, and be able to plan much. you’re the reason akutagawa is searching for his sister in the first place. this is over.”

“no, wait-!”

dazai reached out his arm, but he halted at the familiar click of a gun. his eye widened and he could only look at you with a horrified expression. he didn’t even have to look down to know your trusty pistol was in your hand.

“please put the gun away,” dazai begged, his face contorting to an expression of sorrow.

“i’m sorry, but i’m afraid i can’t do that. if i do, who knows what’ll happen to me? but then again, i’m already screwed if this is a trap. the port mafia’s boss is cunning, so i’m done acting like we’re close.”

“i didn’t want to become the boss! i… and i didn’t think of it as an act, not at all. it’s the truth, i swear.”

he looked at you so sincerely that you almost dropped the gun from your side. raw emotion was behind his words, or so you thought. maybe he could still be lying to you? maybe lying to himself. after all, there are liars so good that they’ve deceived themselves.

you looked down at your lap, “i guess that i’ve got to come up with another plan for saving akutagawa. well, if i can leave this establishment alive, that is.”

dazai insisted, “this isn’t a trap. i would never even dream of doing something like that to you, n/n.”

“my name is l/n y/n, not n/n.”

another shot to the chest.

“right, y/n. you asked me why i lured akutagawa to the mafia headquarters, right? well, i did it to protect this world.”

you raised a brow, “this world?”

“this is but one of countless worlds. and in another world, the original world, you and i were- we were—”“

“i love you,” he recalls the light touch of your fingers burning up his skin, “and there’s nothing in any universe that would change that.”

“—we were friends. you and i were friends in the original world. we drank at this bar and spent time together talking about the most insignificant things.”

dazai can also remember your last moments. you were laying in your own pool of blood when he finally caught up to you. when you spoke to him, you spoke in that same calm voice you’ve always had. and then, the smoke of the cigarette in your hand had dissipated into nothing, just like the light in your eyes.

“even if that were true, that doesn’t change what you did to akutagawa and his sister. you separated them, and now here we are,” you reminded dazai. “we may have been close in the original world, as you call it, but we are enemies now.

“i love you—“

dazai’s eyes searched for something the air that wasn’t there. his eye darted around, and his lips would slightly part and shut after a few seconds. his face twisted as he continued to remember everything.

“—and there’s nothing in any universe that would change that.”

“it was hard... it was really hard fighting mimic without you in the organization. i had no choice but to take over for mori and make enemies of everyone around me to expand the business,” dazai finally looked back at you. slowly, his hands reached for your cheeks. “everything i did was for this world’s- for you. i needed a world where you can sit here, happy with the people around you again.”

for a reason you couldn’t decipher, the hand that held your gun began to tremble. well, maybe it had been trembling for a long time and you were only now just recognizing it. dazai’s hands, cold and soft at the touch, held your face as if you were the most delicate thing in the world.

it was a touch of a lover.

coming down to that conclusion, everything made sense to you. dazai always looked at you like you were closest thing to him, a lifeline if you may. his nicknames, the flirting, it was all because...

“we were in a relationship, weren’t we?”

dazai would’ve missed your words if the proximity between the two of you wasn’t this close. the way he froze in his spot had answered enough, and you could only sigh. slowly, you put your gun back into your jacket and rested your hands on dazai’s.

you gently pried his hands off of your face and held them between your own. you felt no specific feelings from the action, but you were sure dazai did based off of how his face softened.

“i’m sorry, but you have to leave your feelings out of this. i don’t know how you know what happened in the original world, and i won’t ask. i just have to tell you that i don’t feel what you do. like i said, you and i are enemies here. as long as you control the port mafia and i’m part of the armed detective agency, it’ll remain this way.”

“nothing in any universe that would change that.”

“i see,” dazai took his hands back and rested them on his lap. “well, the reason i invited you here in the first place was to say goodbye.”

“you really don’t plan on ever seeing me again?”

“you said it, didn’t you? we’re enemies as long as we’re associated with the organizations we’re in. so after today, i won’t see you again. it’ll only hurt more if i do.”

“then this makes this a goodbye,” you watched as he stood up from his stool, hands in his pockets.

“yes, it does. a life with someone you can say goodbye to is a good life, especially when it hurts so much to say it to them. am i wrong?”

“i guess you wouldn’t be... i haven’t said goodbye to anyone and have it pain me,” you replied, feeling bad for the port mafia’s boss.

“i hope you don’t for a long time. but one day, that time will come. you won’t be prepare for it, but all i can tell you is to let it in. feel everything, and see where it takes you.” dazai faintly smiled before he turned his back to you and began to walk away, “goodbye, n/n.”

“goodbye, my darling.”

painfully, dazai grit his teeth and resisted thew urge to look back. in goodbyes, that’s what they always do. they turn around and crash into the person they’re supposed to be leaving. he didn’t want to do that. this was his goodbye to you, even if it didn’t mean much. if he was going to keep this world functioning, he won’t leave it with you in any pain.

‘be happy, okay? even if it’s without me, be happy. as long as you’re alive, somewhere, i’ll be happy too’

it was a final thought he kept to himself.

NOTE. this remains one of my favorite fics i wrote (i <3 beast!dazai) so i had to bring it over first 🤞🏻

—reblog to support an author + join my taglist !

@lovedazai @enoojnij @spenzitz @aeshiiteiru @chuuyrr @ma3mae @piichuu @dreamlessimp @4nthonyyliving @ruru-kiss @worldussysblog @janbannan @underthetree845 @little-miss-chaoss @siiyoko @osameowdazai

#୨୧ [ writing ] #bsd x reader #bungou stray dogs x reader #bungo stray dogs x reader #dazai x reader #dazai x you #dazai osamu x reader #osamu dazai x reader #dazai oneshot #dazai angst #osamu dazai #bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd beast #bsd manga spoilers

[freyadragonlord]

So now that anime watchers are caught up with the MADNESS, I decided to share the list i made back in august after chapter 109 came out, to try and hang onto sanity...

(spoilers if you are not up to date with either the Bungou Stray Dogs manga or the anime)

REASONS WHY I BELIEVE DAZAI IS GOING TO BE ALRIGHT:

He still has plots that are unresolved, mostly his relationship with Akutagawa.

If/when he were to die, I honestly dont think it would be by losing to Dostoyevsky, it doesn't seem like the right ending for him. Similarly, i don't think Chuuya is the one destined to kill him; ever since meeting each other, Chuuya has only ever given him reasons to stay alive.

I don't think he would die away from the Detective Agency, after being apart from them for so long. They are important to him and for him, and i think he has still a role to play in Atsushi's story as well.

He apparently "died" without thinking of Oda? Suss as fuck.

Dazai never planned for Sigma to join him or to even be at the prison, he couldn't have predicted that. And apparently he never planned for Chuuya to be there either, while Dostoyevsky had previously made plans to have Chuuya brought there to help him. SO, what was Dazai's original plan for escaping and killing Fyodor? Just the time stopping ability user?? It seems unrealistic to me that he and Ango went so far into plotting this from the beginning, and Dazai didnt have other plans in case of unforseen emergencies. Dazai doesnt have a fighting ability, so reasonably there has to be another plan or ally to help him escape and kill Fyodor.

They most likely need Dazai to turn back the vampires, we have no idea if Bram can turn them back into humans himself even if he gets control over them back.

The missing bullet hole on the wall behind Dazai's head (this was very evident in the manga, but it can be seen in the anime too if you look carefully), plus the fact that he could still talk after being shot in the head from 0 cm away (this was cut from the anime, but in the manga he wispers "finally" before gently closing his eyes), seem to indicate he was not really shot in the head.

If he IS dead, Chuuya can turn him into a vampire and reanimate him - this trick has a precedent in one of the light novels, so we know for certain that Dazai can be reanimated by an ability if he is dead, as long as it happens very quickly after he dies.

If Dazai was really dying, I think his last words to Chuuya would have been more genuine and serious.

Dazai still has to prove that his bond with Chuuya isn't as shallow as Fyodor taunted him for. Cmon guys.... Are we letting Dostoyevsky get away with that one?? I don't think so. Dazai's biggest advantage over him has always been the power of friendship!

#none of these is strong enough by itself for me to be 100% sure but like #i am mostly confident dazai is okay #this is not his time #FUKUZAWA ON THE OTHER HAND #but that's another story #bungou stray dogs #bungou stray dogs spoilers #bsd #bsd spoilers #bsd season 5 #dazai #dazai osamu #dazai is alive #bungo stray dogs

[transigma]

bsd character design analysis ★

– part 1: borrowed clothing and its symbolism

word count: 1.3k

includes: dazai, beast dazai, akutagawa, ranpo, yosano

1.) Dazai's Coat (PM vs ADA)

Following the Port Mafia tradition of giving a new subordinate a superior's item as a sign of loyalty, Mori gives Dazai his jacket upon his entrance into the mafia. Dazai never wears this coat correctly, instead draping it around his shoulders.

On the other hand, the coat he wears in the ADA is not only worn in the correct fashion, but it also closely resembles Odazaku's coat.

The way Dazai wears his coat symbolizes where his loyalties lie. He was never loyal to the Port Mafia, or Mori himself. Hedoes takes on Mori's influence, specifically in his acts of getting something done no matter the means. Dazai does not mind playing dirty, and this follows Mori's own ideas of finding the most optimal solution. While I don't believe Mori is entirely the reason Dazai follows this path of action, it is clear that he did have some influence on Dazai with his teachings.

Dazai is loyal to the Armed Detective Agency, however, and goes to extreme measures for his comrades, including sacrificing himself in various ways. (Meursalt, dead apple, etc).

Going back to how his coat resembles Oda's, it gives light into Oda's influence on Dazai, that being him planting a moral seed in Dazai. His final request is for Dazai to strive to be a good person and not dwell along the dark side of humanity any longer. Oda is arguably one of the most important relationships Dazai has over the course of the series. He is the one who sets Dazai on a better path, and Dazai takes his words to heart. Otherwise, he would not have joined the Armed Detective Agency and found people he is loyal to.

2.) Beast Dazai

Beast Dazai noticeably has the same scarf Mori does. This could be a signifier of position as the Port Mafia boss, but I believe it represents tactics that Beast Dazai learned from Mori. I am specifically talking about the control they both excise on others. In order for Beastzai's plan to work, he had to gain an almost absolute hold over the world immediately surrounding Oda. This is why it is mostly him, SSKK, and Oda whose lives are affected by his actions. Most everyone else's lives remain similar to the original BSD verse. The members of each organization are the same, is what I mean.

The iron grip that beast Dazai has over the Beast universe in order to reach his goal resembles the tactics Mori uses as the Port Mafia boss. Absolute control.

Beast Dazai's coat is another important factor. Unlike PM Dazai in the main BSD universe, beast Dazai wears his coat correctly and not around his shoulders. Beast Dazai is dedicated to his goal of securing a world where Oda can stay alive and freely write his novels. His loyalty is not to the Port Mafia, but that goal.

3.) Akutagawa's Coat

This is another item that follows the Port Mafia tradition and Dazai gives him his own coat on the night that he picks up Akutagawa from the slums.

Akutagawa's coat is a representation of his trauma and dependence on Dazai's recognition to live. His goal is to receive the recognition he never got from Dazai in the past, and this hinders his own development. While Akutagawa does not care about Dazai as a person, the effect Dazai's training had on him was creating a dependence on this approval.

His coat is his most important item for the greater majority of the series. He does not use his ability without it, and keeps it on at all times, which is another topic to discuss upon his coat/ability and protecting himself. In fact, he believes for a while that he can't use his ability without his coat, either, or that he is defenseless without it.

This changes during the Decay of the Angel's arc, specifically in the SSKK vs Fukuchi fight. In a pivotal moment, Akuatagwa discards his coat in order to aid Atsushi in delivering a powerful blow to Fukuchi. He uses Rashomon without his coat for the first time in this scene, too, which shows his growth as a character, and no longer relying so heavily on having to prove himself to Dazai for a reason to live. It is an example of him making his own choices and not being under the influence of Dazai's teachings onto him that he needed to prove himself useful, or that he is even useless in the first place.

4.) Ranpo's Glasses

Fukuzawa gives Ranpo an ordinary pair of glasses in the Untold Origins novel as a way to "control" his ability. Now, it is well established that these are a cheap pair, and that they are useless since Ranpo is not actually an ability user, however, the importance of it lies in Fukuzawa's influence on Ranpo, and the facade Ranpo subscribes to.

Fukuzawa is a figure that represents an integral point in Ranpo's life. Before the events of Untold Origins, Ranpo had no one in his life as a result of his parent's death. Fukuzawa is the first figure to step up for Ranpo and try to guide him, he is the sole reason Ranpo realizes he is not isolated in this world. This is important because Ranpo needs that at 14 years old. Fukuzawa is the cause if Ranpo's worldview changes, otherwise he would have continued to stray on his own uncertain path.

This also marks the beginning of Ranpo's attachment to being viewed as an ability user. He has an innate need to prove himself above the extraordinary because he cares about protecting the ones he values, namely the Agency. His resolve to be strong for his friends and family is strong, and this relates to the fact that he is so driven on remaining this image of an astounding man. He can't afford to lose his place in this light precisely because he is such an important piece of the Agency. The Agency was created because of Ranpo, after all, as a place for him to utilize his intellectual gift and to belong with Fukuzawa to.

His glasses tie back as a symbol of this in the Ranpo and Poe chapter (32). He loses his glasses while in Poe's ability space, and has a meltdown over the fact that he can't use his ability without them. It has also been established that Ranpo is self aware of his non-ability reality, yet he still clings to it because he needs to live up to that self standard, and his glasses are the object of this.

(I had images for this and yosano but Tumblr has a 10 image limit ://)

5.) Yosano and Her Butterfly Pin

There is a strong theme between life & death, and rebirth & transformation within Yosano's character.

Yosano gets her hair pin from Tachihara's older brother, who was a soldier in the "immortal army" unit under Mori's command. The way she acquires this hair pin is important because he represent a huge aspect of her trauma during this time, as the repeated abuse of her ability on him ended with his suicide. This time also cements her connection with life and death through her ability. She has the ability to control life and death itself, after all. Life is important to Yosano, this is established from her herself during her fight with Kaji through her comments on death is the lack of life, and the way she strives to save lives with her ability.

Butterflies serve as a symbol of metamorphosis, whether physical or emotional, and Yosano follows this theme well. She changes drastically as a person, as she does not let her past nor her ability connect her to that level of inhumanity she is pushed into by others' views. Golden butterflies specifically represent transformation, hope, or something along the lines of past souls as well, which fits with Yosano well.

#bungou stray dogs #bsd analysis #character design #character design analysis #infodump #bsd #bsd yosano #bsd dazai #bsd chuuya #bsd ranpo #beast dazai #bsd beast #bungo stray dogs #allen.textz #character essay #can you tell Im autistic about these guys #part one I plan on doing more of these #bsd character analysis #bsd manga #allen bsd thoughts

[lovingherrscher]

Kabedon gone wrong ft BSD Men

Ft: Dazai Osamu, Nakahara Chuuya, Nakajima Atsushi, Oda Sakunosuke, Fyodor Dostoevsky.

Warning: crack, fluff, some suggestive contents, a bonus ft 15!Dazai & Chuuya. Fuck off if you're tryna file a complaint on me.

Best with: Uninvited School - Blue Archive OST

Dazai

He knows what this is. Ofc, what do you expect from this man?

Will try that out even when you two are at the ADA. He doesn't give a damn about his co-workers covering Kyouka's eyes.

Might use that to initiate a make out session in the office.

His style is using one hand to trap you as his other lift your chin up so your eyes are locked.

"Uh...Osamu..? What are you doing?"

You knew that moment when you asked Dazai whether he knows what a kabedon is, you fucked up. As by now, you're trapped between the Agency's nearest wall and your beloved Dazai's arm.

His free hand spare no mercy as he grabbed your chin, forcing you to look into his eyes. If not for the ruckus everyone else is causing in the background, you could've focus more on those brown orbs you adore so much, but alas, this isn't your shared apartment, but the Agency, and well, Kyouka is there too.

Your background was a Kunikida who had broke his who-knows-how-many pen in this week, a Yosano in the back sighing as she was covering innocent Kyouka's eyes. At the same time, the Tanizaki siblings were reacting differently, as Naomi were fangirling over the scene, her "I want you to do that too, dear brother~" didn't went unheard, Tanizaki, on the other hand was flushing as he tries to refuse his little sister. The luckiest thing were probably Atsushi was accompanying Kenji out for a job, while Ranpo was too busy munching on his snacks, though the scene didn't went unnoticed to our great detective.

"Now, what do you say we continue this later, just you and me in our bedroom, hm?"

Dazai whispers in your ears, right before Kunikida strangles the man as he dragged him away, claiming he won't let that bandage-wasting-device ruin the perfect scenery of the office anymore.

Chuuya

He knows what this is, like Dazai. But due to the height (dis)advantage, he may or may not perform this to his lovely s/o.

If you beg him till he deems enough, he may consider giving you what you want, but would be a little different.

He'll use his leg to trapped you instead, so instead of a kabedon we'll have a ashidon. Oops?

Jokes aside, I personally think he'll be using one hand and one leg on both side so you cannot escape.

"Your... wish is my command, princess."

You could've swore you felt him sighing as he press on each syllable. And how did this happen again? It kinda cost you a bottle or two of Chuuya's favorite wine, plus one night with you wearing his favorite lingerie set, which of course, he chose that out for you himself. All of that, just for a fleeting moment of recreating your favorite scene in a certain shoujo manga. Was it all worth it?

But right now, as you, trapped between the ginger and the wall, you felt no regret. It wasn't exactly like how you imagine it would be, as he traps you with a hand on this side, and a leg on the other side, supposedly due to your lover's (dis)advantage of heights. But it's counted, right? This still count as a kabedon, right?!

You could saw his smirk, the one he always did before he beats up the enemies, and that moment you knew you fucked up. Chuuya took his chance while you were still loading and leaned in, his face unbelievable close to yours, "You wouldn't mind if I claim my payment right here, would you?"

Oda

God. This man. Where do I even start?

Like our boi sushi, he won't know what this is until he asked his friend Dazai.

Definitely not Dazai laughing his ass off in the bar while Oda is just like "Oh, i understand now." as if nothing just happened.

Man is a walking pole I tell you so he'd definitely be able to do this without flaws.

His style will be using both hands as he leans close enough to kiss you, leaving no escape, the pressure from this man feel like he's going to eat us-

When you first asked Oda for a kabedon, you honestly didn't think it'll be something like this. He admitted that he didn't know what that is, so at time like this, Oda'd seek help from his best friend. Dazai, was more than happy to assist him in this, so the two spent a whole night at Lupin studying about kabedon, while Ango in the back refuse to add this 'weird' knowledge.

So when the tutoring session end, Oda decided to try his newly acquired skill on you, like you asked for. You, caged in between his hands, your back was against the bedroom wall, the red-ish hue on your cheeks didn't went unnoticed as Oda leans in to steal your lips for a brief moment.

As you would describe, Oda's kiss taste like adulthood, filled with bitterness. The slight taste of caffeine and the harsh, painful taste of cigarettes, mixed with a hue of whiskey, just like him. And you love it, you love the addicting bitterness you can never get enough, and the mafioso loves that sweet, not-so-innocent taste of yours as well.

But worry not, for the night is still young. And who's to say Oda will let you go that easy?

Atsushi

Needs to be persevered.

Too precious for his own good.

He mistook that for a type of rice bowl at first but after Dazai explains what it is (cue the whole ADA holding their laughter in the background) sushiboi almost fainted.

The first time is kinda awkward so you had to show him how it's done.

Kinda backfired on him, poor boy-

"(y/n)..? What are you doing?!"

The white-haired flinched slightly as you cornered him to the nearest wall, hands on both side so he can't run away.

"Showing you how it's done, of course!"

Earlier today, when Dazai was talking about kabedon down the cafe, Atsushi couldn't help but ask what was that. Maybe the tiger's fur has, erm, overgrown in the ear, so that's why he mistook it as a new kind of ricebowl. Dazai was staring for a good while before burst out in laughter, which quickly spread to the Tanizaki siblings, and Yosano, even the infamous detective Ranpo, who was currently enjoying his parfait had to pause a bit so he can join the wagon.

You were running an errand so by the time you came back, everything has ended, but luckily for you, you have Naomi at your back! She told you everything, even that part later on when Dazai had to explain what a kabedon is to Atsushi. So an idea popped up in that small, mischievous head of your. Why not show him how it's done?

And that leads us back to the present as you were cornering Atsushi, the pinkish hue spreaded all over you two's cheeks. Yet what surprised you was that Atsushi decided it's his time to strike back as he leans up and claim your lips. The sudden act made the gears in your head stopped, inevitably, your hands slowly slipping off their positions, so he took that as a chance to grab your wrist and pinned you down the mattress.

"You know, (y/n). I am a man too, and as they said, men are hungry wolves. So why don't you let me have a taste then?"

Fyodor

This man? Yes, he speaks Japanese fluently, even better than a Japanese person even. But when it comes to culture and stuffs he's a complete fool.

Luckily for him, the (beloved) clown is there to assist!

Nikolai gave him a private tutoring session later, he even prepares some documents (shoujo manga) to help his friend understand faster, though I doubt this is needed with his intelligence...

After the tutoring session, he'd achieved the level of a almost-perfect kabedon. With one hand and one leg on both side, his free hand is free to lift your chin, as you were forced to lock eyes with him, he'll take no time but lean in for a quick, chaste kiss that's just enough to make you yearn for more.

When it comes to this foreign language, Fyodor is confident that he doesn't sound one bit like an outsider. But he doesn't pay that much focus to culture and anything else, because to him, language is just an another tool he uses to achieve his utmost goal.

So when you first brought up the topic of a 'kabedon', he had no idea what that is. But Nikolai, who was, coincidentally present at the moment, decided to jump in, "No worries! I'll teach you everything you need, Dos-kun!" before dragging his best friend somewhere else.

And the jester stays true to his words, as he brought out everything you need for a, erm, lesson? From illustration to videos as examples, even a dummy from where ever the hell he keeps it. He has everything he needed, and to make it even more, fancier, as he claimed, Nikolai even took them out from his cloak, just like Dora*mon.

Results? Well, now you can enjoy the feeling of a shoujo manga heroine with your beloved man, as he had mastered the art of kabedon, with one hand on the side, and one leg on the other side, the demon can seize the chance to grab your chin, forcing your eyes to met his violet irises, which you once told him they're like a kind of drugs, since once you've gaze upon them, you could never escape.

As you lost yourself in his eyes, Fyodor had his lips pressed against your in a swift movement, but the moment didn't last long, as the kiss were quick to come and quick to leave as well. But then there comes another chaste kiss, follows by another, leaving you hungry for more.

"I have to admit, I do enjoy your helpless state, myshka. Why don't you show me more?"

15!Dazai + 15!Chuuya

You were going to try this out on them, but it backfired, of course. And now we have an uno reverse card situation. But again, who wouldn't want to be sandwiched between these two?

Who would've knew a small shenanigans of your could lead to such huge consequences? You, trapped between the most powerful duo of Port Mafia, and maybe the whole Yokohama even.

It was when your braincells decided they're gonna take a break for today and let the stupid part do all the work, so as you three were in Dazai's office, you, out of all questions decided to ask them about kabedon. The two young boys exchanged a look before nonchalantly replies in unison,

"No. Care to teach us?"

If it were to be your everyday self, you would've refuse because there is absolutely no way they can't know what it is. Unfortunately, your braincells are on their vacation, and you waltzed right in their hands. So you asked them to stand over the nearest wall, and after struggling for a good while, congratulations, you managed to trapped the two in your arms. Their backs pressed against the wall as your hands rested right by the side of their heads,

"I guess... It looks like this?"

Before you could leave, or could even register what was happening, Dazai and Chuuya had quickly pulled you back. As by now you became the trapped one, Dazai on your right and Chuuya on your left, they tower over your body.

"I think it's our turn now. Don't ya think so?"

Followed by Chuuya's words, a kiss was placed on both side of your cheeks. You couldn't possibly imagine you, being toyed by two younger boys like this. But oh how the table had turned. Dazai, being the faster soon places a kiss on your lips, ignoring the complaints coming from the ginger.

"Now you are mine~"

"Hey! Since when was she yours, you suicidal freak?!"

Chuuya, didn't want to be left behind, suddenly pulls you towards him and claim your lips in a rougher manner comparing to his partner.

When you two parted, Dazai was holding onto you from behind, only now you see him acting like a true child. And Chuuya, who obviously doesn't want to lose, holding you close to him,

"Until you can choose, would you be ours?"

#yoha writes #bungou stray dogs #bsd dazai #bungo stray dogs dazai #dazai osamu #dazai osamu x reader #dazai x reader #bsd chuuya #chuuya x reader #bungou stray dogs chuuya #bsd atsushi #atsushi x reader #nakajima atsushi #odasaku x reader #bungo stray dogs odasaku #oda sakunosuke #fyodor x reader #fyodor x y/n #bsd fyodor #fyodor dostoevsky #dazai x y/n #chuuya nakahara #chuuya x you

[pauli-writes]

warnings: mentions of oda’s death, mention of the orphanage, hurt comfort, dazai is being dazai

pairing: atsushi x reader (reader is oda’s younger sibling in this)

author’s note: i got sad thinking about oda :( timeline wise i imagined this to go in between the first arc and the guild arc just in case you were curious. i might make a part 2 of this cuz i like the premise

“reader!“ you looked up at the sound of the bell chiming and people entering the cafe. as usual it was some members of the detective agency upstairs. dazai was leading the pack, behind him doctor yosano and ranpo, and lastly atsushi. they looked pretty pleased with themselves, they must have just finished with a case.

“you all look chipper, did you finish a case?” you asked them with a friendly smile, starting to prepare a few baked treats for them (mainly ranpo) and freshly brewing some coffee.

“all thanks to me!” ranpo replied as they sat down in a booth. it made you smile hearing ranpo recount the events of the case with the occasional comment or correction from yosano and dazai. it also gave you enough time to finish their usual orders and put them on their table.

once you got to atsushi you noticed how silent he was and seemed to be avoiding looking at you directly. you furrowed your eyebrows and looked at dazai, who in turn just shrugged innocently, but you knew that he knew something like he always did. you turned to look at ranpo in hopes of getting something from him, but he was already munching away on the piece of cake you gave him. doctor yosano wasn’t much help either, idly drinking coffee without a care in the world.

you returned to the counter and cleaned a few glasses, listening to the agency having a few humerus exchanges and keeping an eye on the clock in the corner of the room. yosano and ranpo left after a while, but dazai and atsushi remained.

“oh, that reminds me. you have somewhere to be today, don’t you reader?” you looked up at the mention of your name and saw dazai looking at you with a knowing expression.

“if you already know, why are you asking me?”

“that’s no way to talk to the person who got you this job,” he replied, before sitting up straight and turning a bit more serious. it was a rare sight nowadays, and it usually wasn’t very good when it happened. “i know i promised i’d come with you, but something came up.”

you blinked in surprise, “you’re not coming? but today-“

“i’m sorry,” he wasn’t. he took another sip of coffee and turned to look at atsushi opposite to him, who looked like he wanted to be anywhere but here. “i have something more important to do. but atsushi here is free. i’m sure he’ll be happy to accompany you.”

both you and atsushi’s eyes widened at the moment, for very different reasons. you didn’t want to bother him with your problems, that besides the fact that dazai had that look on his face that meant that he was planning something, meanwhile atsushi simply didn’t want to intrude into your personal life, seemingly unaware of dazai’s ulterior motive.

“oh, i can go alone.“ you quickly said, busying yourself with cleaning the counter.

dazai however shook his head. “no way. it’s way too dangerous with the port mafia around. besides, i think it’s best if you have someone around for this.”

you looked down for a moment, dazai probably was right (like always). you lifted your head and looked at atsushi, wondering what he thought. he was anxiously fiddling with his hands, not really knowing what to do. this seemed more like a thing between you and dazai if he was being honest. he sensed your questioning gaze on him and jumped a little in his seat.

“oh, i don’t mind if you don’t,” he replied earnestly, “i finished all of my work today early so i have the time.”

you turned your gaze back at dazai, who only looked at you curiously, probably awaiting your next move. in the end you let out a sigh and nodded your head at the two men.

“okay, but just this once,” you said to atsushi softly, before looking at dazai with a hardened expression, “And you owe me.”

your shift ended a few minutes later, dazai left to attend to his very important thing he told nobody about, and you and atsushi set off to your desired destination.

on the way you stopped to get some flowers, and you made some pleasant small talk. it made you realise how little time you have actually spent with atsushi. he told you about his time at the agency and how he’s enjoying it so far (besides the countless near death experiences) and you told him about your life, which was very mundane and the only exciting thing was when the agency came down from work to eat and drink at the cafe.

you eventually reached your destination and upon seeing it, you expected atsushi to ask you why you were here, but he didn’t, which meant he knew why you were here. you walked up ahead and atsushi followed you silently, eventually you turned to face him.

“aren’t you going to ask me?”

his face turned red, “a-ask you what, reader?”

“why we bought the flowers and why we’re at a cemetery,” you explained slowly, making him turn even redder.

he laughed awkwardly and rubbed the back of his neck, “oh, yeah why is that?”

you only deadpanned at his reaction, “you’re a horrible actor.” you told him, before softening a little, “dazai told you.”

you continued you way down the rows and rows of graves, before walking up a small hill with a tree on top. atsushi continued to follow you and explained himself to you, his cheeks still a little red from being flustered.

“b-before we went to the cafe today dazai-san told me that you might be acting a bit moody, when i asked why that was he told me that it’s because today’s the anniversary of your brother’s death… b-but i didn’t know that he was going to make me come here with you, i suppose that’s just regular dazai-san for you…i’m sorry I didn’t say anything sooner.”

you let his words sink in and nodded, stopping at the sole grave at the top of the hill. you let out a deep breath. “it’s alright, atsushi. dazai was being dazai again… i know you were just trying to protect my feelings.”

atsushi let out a breath and relief as he heard you say that, his face returning to its normal colour. you smiled a little and handed him a flower from your bunch.

“you can put one down too,” you told him softly. “normally dazai would join me for this, but you’ll do too,” atsushi gulped nervously, but nodded. together the two of you placed the flowers carefully on to his grave, a bitter sweet feeling in the air.

afterwards you two sat down by the tree, which was overlooking the rest of the graves on the cemetery as well as a small part of the ocean. it was nice a quiet and a small breeze was in the air, it was quite beautiful. you turned your head away from the sight and saw atsushi eyeing the grave with the new flowers on it.

“i still remember the last thing he said to me,” you spoke up, making him immediately snap his attention back to you. “It was ‘see you later’ I didn’t think too much about it at first but, looking back he probably knew he wasn’t going to make it back… he knew he was going to leave me, and he did it anyways…”

“i’m sure he wouldn’t have left you if there was another choice.” atsushi replied, trying to make you feel better. “he probably was trying to get the best possible out come for everyone.”

your hands subconsciously balled into fists as you avoided atsushi’s gaze and looked at the grave instead. “you don’t know him, you don’t even know what happened leading up to it. heck, i didn’t know what was going on until dazai told me days later…” you took a deep shaky breath, putting your face into your hands, as tears started to gather in the corners of your eyes. “i’m sorry. i didn’t mean that.”

atsushi was quick to put a comforting hand on your shoulder and give you soft pats. he actually didn’t know what he was suppose to do. growing up in the orphanage he never really had to comfort any other people besides himself, if you started fully crying right now he would start to panic. “i-it’s alright, you are right. i didn’t know him and i don’t know what happened…” he said sincerely, “a-and i have never lost someone i truly care about. i was always alone up until i met you and the agency. i couldn’t possible tell you anything to make you feel better and for that i’m sorry. but i am willing to listen if you need to vent…”

he saw how your body visibly relaxed and let out a quiet breath in relief. you turned to look at him again, a small grateful smile on your face. “thank you…”

he smiled back at you, “no problem.”

the two of you spent the remainder of the day by that tree, simply talking, something that humans surprisingly don’t do a lot anymore. talking to atsushi was nice, he was very considerate of your thoughts and feelings and listened intently. he wasn’t being pushy, or disinterested, he was simply enjoying spending time with you.

eventually the sun started to set and you got up, stretching your limbs. “well, i’d better go home it’s getting dark.”

atsushi followed your lead and also got back up on his feet. “I’ll walk you home.”

“you don’t have to do that,” you told him, “you’ve done more than enough today.”

he only smiled softly at you. “i know i don’t have to, but i want to.”

you smiled back at him and nodded, “…okay.”

#bsd x reader #bungou stray dogs #bungou stray dogs x reader #atsushi nakajima #bsd atsushi #bungou stray dogs x you #bungou stray dogs atsushi #atsushi x reader #bsd x y/n #bsd x gender neutral reader #bsd x you #atsushi nakajima x reader