#totally didnt reblog this to the wrong blog at first

[corvidcall]

I posted 18,037 times in 2022

That's 1,739 more posts than 2021!

401 posts created (2%)

17,636 posts reblogged (98%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@sassytail

@omgitsseddie

@blazing-spectre

@starlit-mansion

I tagged 3,204 of my posts in 2022

#anime life - 339 posts

#hermitcraft - 176 posts

#iswm - 127 posts

#homestuck - 106 posts

#fnaf - 96 posts

#ofmd - 88 posts

#deltarune - 80 posts

#markcu - 75 posts

#disco elysium - 60 posts

#splatoon - 54 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#yucky but its fine for other people i guess. good in other things but gross as a primary condiment. yummy!!!! i love mushrooms. yucky and gi

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

i had a dream last night where i was in a high stakes game of magic the gathering, and even though im very bad at magic the gathering, i was extremely winning because WotC just came out with a new set of cards for like. Pride i guess? and they didnt want to seem homophobic so they were very OP.

anyway heres my best recreation of two of the gay mtg cards

(the lyrics on the lesbian card are from Dodie's song "She" - I don't remember exactly if those were the lyrics on the card but i DO remember looking at it and going "oh i guess they got Dodie involved in this? ok")

110 notes - Posted April 16, 2022

#4

i think it's really funny when people criticize something they don't like by calling it "soulless". saw someone say that about squishmallows, and said that instead of buying that soullless crap, you could spend the same amount of money buying a real stuffed animal

now, i don't care if they do or don't like squishmallows, but i am fascinated by the premise. squishmallows dont have souls, but other stuffed animals do? is toy story real? are beanie babies going to christian heaven?

319 notes - Posted September 19, 2022

#3

None Of You Know What Haiku Are

I'm going to preface this by saying that i am not an expert in ANY form of poetry, just an enthusiast. Also, this post is... really long. Too long? Definitely too long. Whoops! I love poetry.

If you ask most English-speaking people (or haiku-bot) what a haiku is, they would probably say that it's a form of poetry that has 3 lines, with 5, and then 7, and then 5 syllables in them. That's certainly what I was taught in school when we did our scant poetry unit, but since... idk elementary school when I learned that, I've learned that that's actually a pretty inaccurate definition of haiku. And I think that inaccurate definition is a big part of why most people (myself included until relatively recently!) think that haiku are kind of... dumb? unimpressive? simple and boring? I mean, if you can just put any words with the right number of syllables into 3 lines, what makes it special?

Well, let me get into why the 5-7-5 understanding of haiku is wrong, and also what makes haiku so special (with examples)!

First of all, Japanese doesn't have syllables! There's a few different names for what phonetic units actually make up the language- In Japanese, they're called "On" (音), which translates to "sound", although English-language linguists often call it a "mora" (μ), which (quoting from Wikipedia here) "is a basic timing unit in the phonology of some spoken languages, equal to or shorter than a syllable." (x) "Oh" is one syllable, and also one mora, whereas "Oi" has one syllable, but two moras. "Ba" has one mora, "Baa" has two moras, etc. In English, we would say that a haiku is made up of three lines, with 5-7-5 syllables in them, 17 syllables total. In Japanese, that would be 17 sounds.

For an example of the difference, the word "haiku", in English, has 2 syllables (hai-ku), but in Japanese, はいく has 3 sounds (ha-i-ku). "Christmas" has 2 syllables, but in Japanese, "クリスマス" (ku-ri-su-ma-su) is 5 sounds! that's a while line on its own! Sometimes the syllables are the same as the sounds ("sushi" is two syllables, and すし is two sounds), but sometimes they're very different.

In addition, words in Japanese are frequently longer than their English equivalents. For example, the word "cuckoo" in Japanese is "ほととぎす" (hototogisu).

Now, I'm sure you're all very impressed at how I can use an English to Japanese dictionary (thank you, my mother is proud), but what does any of this matter? So two languages are different. How does that impact our understanding of haiku?

Well, if you think about the fact that Japanese words are frequently longer than English words, AND that Japanese counts sounds and not syllables, you can see how, "based purely on a 17-syllable counting method, a poet writing in English could easily slip in enough words for two haiku in Japanese” (quote from Grit, Grace, and Gold: Haiku Celebrating the Sports of Summer by Kit Pancoast Nagamura). If you're writing a poem using 17 English syllables, you are writing significantly more content than is in an authentic Japanese haiku.

(Also not all Japanese haiku are 17 sounds at all. It's really more of a guideline.)

Focusing on the 5-7-5 form leads to ignoring other strategies/common conventions of haiku, which personally, I think are more interesting! Two of the big ones are kigo, a season word, and kireji, a cutting word.

Kigo are words/phrases/images associated with a particular season, like snow for winter, or cherry blossoms for spring. In Japan, they actually publish reference books of kigo called saijiki, which is basically like a dictionary or almanac of kigo, describing the meaning, providing a list of related words, and some haiku that use that kigo. Using a a particular kigo both grounds the haiku in a particular time, but also alludes to other haiku that have used the same one.

Kireji is a thing that doesn't easily translate to English, but it's almost like a spoken piece of punctuation, separating the haiku into two parts/images that resonate with and add depth to each other. Some examples of kireji would be "ya", "keri", and "kana." Here's kireji in action in one of the most famous haiku:

古池や　蛙飛び込む　水の音 (Furu ike ya　kawazu tobikomu　mizu no oto) (The old pond — A frog jumps in The sound of the water.)

You can see the kireji at the end of the first line- 古池や literally translates to "old pond ya". The "ya" doesn't have linguistic meaning, but it denotes the separation between the two focuses of the haiku. First, we are picturing a pond. It's old, mature. The water is still. And then there's a frog! It's spring and he's fresh and new to the world! He jumps into the pond and goes "splash"! Wowie! When I say "cutting word", instead of say, a knife cutting, I like to imagine a film cut. The camera shows the pond, and then it cuts to the frog who jumps in.

English doesn't really have a version of this, at least not one that's spoken, but in English language haiku, people will frequently use a dash or an ellipses to fill the same role.

Format aside, there are also some conventions of the actual content, too. They frequently focus on nature, and are generally use direct language without metaphor. They use concrete images without judgement or analysis, inviting the reader to step into their shoes and imagine how they'd feel in the situation. It's not about describing how you feel, so much as it's about describing what made you feel.

Now, let's put it all together, looking at a haiku written Yosa Buson around 1760 (translated by Harold G. Henderson)

The piercing chill I feel: my dead wife's comb, in our bedroom, under my heel

We've got our kigo with "the piercing chill." We read that, and we imagine it's probably winter. It's cold, and the kind of cold wind that cuts through you. There's our kireji- this translation uses a colon to differentiate our two images: the piercing chill, and the poet stepping on his dead wife's comb. There's no descriptions of what the poet is feeling, but you can imagine stepping into his shoes. You can imagine the pain he's experiencing in that moment on your own.

"But tumblr user corvidcall!" I hear you say, "All the examples you've used so far are Japanese haiku that have been translated! Are you implying that it's impossible for a good haiku to be written in English?" NO!!!!! I love English haiku! Here's a good example, which won first place in the 2000 Henderson haiku contest, sponsored by the Haiku Society of America:

meteor shower . . . a gentle wave wets our sandals

When you read this one, can you imagine being in the poet's place? Do you feel the surprise as the tide comes in? Do you feel the summer-ness of the moment? Haiku are about describing things with the senses, and how you take in the world around you. In a way, it's like the poet is only setting a scene, which you inhabit and fill with meaning based on your own experiences. You and I are imagining different beaches, different waves, different people that make up the "our" it mentioned.

"Do I HAVE to include all these things when I write haiku? If I include all these things, does that mean my haiku will be good?" I mean, I don't know. What colors make up a good painting? What scenes make up a good play? It's a creative medium, and nobody can really tell you you can't experiment with form. Certainly not me! But I think it's important to know what the conventions of the form are, so you can appreciate good examples of it, and so you can know what you're actually experimenting with. And I mean... I'm not the poetry cops. But if you're not interested in engaging with the actual conventions and limitations of the form, then why are you even using that form?

I'll leave you with one more English language haiku, which is probably my favorite haiku ever. It was written by Tom Bierovic, and won first place at the 2021 Haiku Society of America Haiku Awards

a year at most . . . we pretend to watch the hummingbirds

Sources: (x) (x) (x) (x) (x) (x)

Further reading:

Forms in English Haiku by Keiko Imaoka Haiku: A Whole Lot More Than 5-7-5 by Jack How to Write a Bad Haiku by KrisL Haiku Are Not a Joke: A Plea from a Poet Who Has Had It Up to Here by Sandra Simpson Haiku Checklist by Katherine Raine

964 notes - Posted October 17, 2022

#2

there's a post (possibly a genre of posts?) that i see frequently where OP is mad about self care posts that are like "it's okay if you didn't brush your teeth today uwu" and op is mad because they didn't brush their teeth for a long time and now they have huge dental bills and i take umbrage with their idea that it was tumblrs fault that they didnt brush their teeth and if only people had been less nice to them, they would have known to brush more

listen, i didn't brush my teeth for many years. feeling bad about it didnt make me brush more. knowing that people thought it was gross didn't make me brush more. being shamed and guilted about it didn't make me brush more.

what DID help was figuring out what was actually the barrier between me and doing it, and then removing those barriers, even if they felt silly and like they shouldn't be barriers at all

for example:

PROBLEM: my toothbrush is too big to fit in the cabinet and I can't leave it on the counter, so I have to keep it in my bedroom and remember to bring it with me to brush

SOLUTION: buy a new, smaller toothbrush. i know i already have a perfectly good one that's nicer than the new one i bought, but a cheap toothbrush i actually use is a million times more valuable than an expensive brush i dont

PROBLEM: i dont want to brush immediately after i wake up, it feels gross and makes me gag

SOLUTION: i set an alarm for a few hours after i wake up and do it then. the teeth dont know the difference!

PROBLEM: i hate mint and i hate cinnamon. most toothpastes are mint and the ones that aren't mint are cinnamon

SOLUTION: start buying kids toothpaste. this has the added bonus of i think it's fun and whimsical

Being mad at yourself for not brushing isn't going to help. You KNOW you should be brushing your teeth. People who don't brush their teeth aren't UNAWARE that their dental hygiene is important!!! Posts that say "if you didn't brush your teeth, you don't need to feel ashamed about it" aren't hurting people, because shame and blame don't help people form healthier habits, and frankly, it's weird to pin the consequences of your unhealthy habits on people for not shaming you more!!!

27,908 notes - Posted February 26, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

for the record. i dont post cringe to keep the twitter users at bay. i do not post cringe at all. if you cringe at my posts, thats on you, not me. i am simply having a good time on this webbed site and if that makes you cringe, i am sorry for whatever you see in me that shames you so.

29,443 notes - Posted November 8, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #long post #my magic the gathering dream deserved more attention tbh. that was the funniest shit ive ever experienced

[coughloop]

vent/rant post about fash/cryptofash/reactionaries on tumblr under the cut dont reblog

im really frustrated with how things have gone down in the last week and im gonna ramble a lot, also im gonna use fash/cryptofash/reactionary and maybe some other terms pretty interchangeably cause they all feel like umbrella terms for the type of people im talking about.

I know we're all getting tired of blocking the same cryptofash accounts that keep remaking over and over again, as well as new ones that find their ways into the periphery of popular posters and have suddenly shoot into popularity until they post something super racist. And a lot of the time it feels so useless and futile, like half the time they have a backup ready to go and the other half just remake in under 24 hours. and like, what does it even do? its not fighting any real world issues, i have no idea what the social effect of having super racist people 3 degrees of separation from everyone on the site actually means, but I know I really fucking dont like it, I know it makes me super uncomfortable to see a mutuals reblog from someone who constantly reblogs and interacts with people that fantasize about beating up trans people on the street.

and now that people like me and some others are getting more and more savvy about noticing cryptofash blogs, it becomes harder and harder to not see how many people i follow that keep me 3 degrees of separation from them.

take ukrainianbimbo for example. they constantly reblog from terfs, transphobes, racists, misogynists and anti-Semites AS WELL as trans people, Jewish people, and people of colour. i blocked them from following me months ago after spending 30 seconds on their blog and recognizing multiple well known tumblr reactionaries. when they noticed i had blocked them and made a couple posts about how easy it is to not follow and reblog from fascists they went on a posting spree whining about how they dont check who they reblog from and why should it be their responsibility. wah wah wah, shut up. anyway, last week they got properly called out for this behaviour and badgrapple came to their defense, going on the dumbest tirade ive ever seen about how theyre sick of fake callouts for people who havent done anything wrong (tell that to your friend ukrainianbimbo who's reaction to being labelled an anti-Semite and a fascist was to triple down on telling a trans jewish woman that she was ugly and should kill herself (both of these things are very untrue shout out Agent, you dont deserve that at all)) and now both of them are going out of their way to interact with more bigots seemingly as a protest for being repressed over hanging with those types in the first place. Fuck off.

All of this then led into people i respect making random vagueposts like "feel like fash is a word being thrown around way too liberally on tumblr these days" and like, yeah, in a way i guess it is, but also people are acting like fascists! crypto fascists specifically because theyre never completely open about their beliefs. fash is shorter and less confusing however (thanks cryptocurrency for that) so thats what people genuinely call them. Why is that a bad thing? If you're posting things that people look at and say "woah dude, you sound like a fascist", maybe thats on you for doing things that other fascists on this site do, not on them for using the "wrong word" for it.

on top of all this though, people HAVE started making up unchecked callouts about people, like Declan smokeweedinbong, who was unfairly called a fascist by someone because declan responded to a comment on his post he didnt background check, thats totally unfair to declan but fuck the reaction from a lot of my mutuals was REALLY WEIRD. people didnt start posting in defense of declan, who again, did nothing wrong but not pay as much attention to a random person as he could have (ive done that too i get it!), but instead people started beating the "cancel culture has gone to far" drum, fucking again. why is that your response?? defend your friends, please! but why is it people who dont want to be exposed to racists and transphobes and anti-Semites ultimately receiving the pushback? its so dumb!

so now half the time i see someone getting an anon about reblogging from a fash, they respond positively but why do they always get follow up anons like "thats dumb who cares, i never look at who i reblog from" like maybe you fucking should?? shut up! people are so fucking stupid on anon it blows me away soemtimes.

i really have no idea where im going with all this, i just really needed to get this frustration of my chest. thanks for reading my run on sentences if you did, and sorry for being somewhat incoherent, i just am so fucking tired of all this, and it doesnt even mean anything. whatever

#d0nt r3bl0g

[24hoursofdaisy]

check in tag

hi was tagged by the sweetheart @dongkwan (ty 🌼) (to read just klick “keep reading”)

1. why did you choose your url?

i just now noticed that i dont remember my previous url anymore lol but i wanted to change it and so a brainstormed a bit and came up with it. I kinda wanted to combine my 2 ult groups (svt +ptg) and i thought the name sounded cute. 

2. any side blogs? if you have them name them and why you have them.

I refused to make several blogs for years until now. but before i became a kpop multistan blog I used to have something like an aesthetic which i totally lost and I wanted to bring back so now i have a “pink aesthetic” and a “neutrals/earthy (?????) aesthetic” blog to be more satisfied with myself again 

3. how long have you been on tumblr?

around 5-6 years. actually i only changed urls several times... this blog is a mess

4. do you have a queue tag?

i do! bcs my brain is full of memes it is “#hello is it me queue looking for” and my brain actually plays the song every time i use the tag. currently i dont use it as much tho

5. why did you start your blog in the first place?

I started as a 5sos fanblog and added bands and further tried to develop some kind of aesthetic

6. why did you choose your icon/pfp?

because i am currently a bit obsessed with seungyoun and i really loved the outfit and everything in this photoshoot

7. why did you choose your header?

i wanted to change my blogs colors and everything and i thought that maybe do or not would be a great mv for a header bcs it is also more recent than naughty boy. and i really like orange/blue combos so i though it would be a great color scheme.

8. what's your post with the most notes?

it is this one which i posted during my 5sos blog era. Long story. Anyways it got this many notes bcs it did get reblogged by the official 5sos blog. But my most popular kpop post is this kingdom set which is funny to me bcs i didnt really like it when i finished editing it and also was like “well i wont gif another kingdom vid again, it’s not worth it”

9. how many mutuals do you have?

more than i could ever imagine. I am thankful for every single one. the exact number is a bit difficult bcs some are of “other eras” and also some blogs have different main blogs which i dont follow. 

10. how many followers do you have?

429 but it would be so much lower if i started as a kpop blog

11. how many people do you follow?

311

12. have you ever made a shitpost?

“To make utterly worthless and inane posts on an internet messageboard.“ then my whole blog is just shitposting

13. how often do you use tumblr each day?

ive spent so many hours on here the last few weeks. whenever i am bored i open tumblr. i try to use it less bcs i have a bit of an unhealthy relationship with tumblr.

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once? who won?

i dont think so? but you never know with me

15. how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ posts?

i have mixed feelings about it bcs everything seems to be so complicated nowadays and often theres no real wrong or right and also theres so much misinformation, you know?

16. do you like tag games?

i do! i love most of them. It is always a bit of micro interaction with other blogs which i wasnt used to before becoming a multi blog so it is new to me but i really enjoy it. 

17. do you like ask games?

omg yes I LOVE LOVE LOVE THEM. i always struggle to answer every single one but it makes me feel heard and kinda wanted here. i appreciate all the sweet ppl sending in asks. I also love when conversation start because of the ask games. 

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

i dont know any of my mutuals follower-count. there are several i would consider rather famous... maybe the one i would consider one of the biggest ones would be alex aka soft-pentagon Actually i would also consider most of my moots rather big. 

19. do you have a crush on a mutual?

not like crush-crush but i have a friend-crush on every 2nd of my moots but i dont wanna be annoying or anything so i usually try to not bother them too much. 

20. tags?

(ofc only if you want to) @kdongyoung @sangyus @minki-s @yejiswife @yootaeyanq @lovelykihyunie @lovehyunggus @shuaway @radlune @bethe-flower @xuseokgyu (feel free to ignore this if you dont want to do it. also hmu if you dont want to be tagged in stuff like this)

#tag game #hi mare 🔮 #i am a dumbass #julia cant answer questions like a normal person #i cant write anything without errors send help

[mingi-bubu]

tagged by @lovepaintt & @keranqi <333

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1. Why did you choose your URL?

super junior is one of my ult groups and kyuhyun was my first ult and yeah haha

2. Any side blogs?

i have many and actually this one is a sideblog too ehehehe.  my carrd has a list of all my other blogs but in sum total i have 12 that are all fairly active, though some more than others.

3. How long have you been on Tumblr?

i first became aware of tumblr in 2012 but i didnt make an account on here until 2013 aldkfj;slk so.  i’ve been here a minute

4. Do you have a queue tag?

no.  i feel like im on here often enouogh that it doesnt matter c i just am. always here jadlfaskj

5. Why did you start your blog in the first place?

okay so.  i was at first gonna do something i called kpop block weekends on my main but then i decided id rather have a specific blog with that as its focus bc i like having things in order despite this blog and three others i have being the only ones where i actually consistently tag things alkdj;lfas

6. Why did you choose your icon?

i made it myself bc blueberry my.st woncheol was *chef’s kiss* and i am not super keen on using other’s work for my own purposes because im just like that

7. Why did you choose your header?

i made it myself and it fucks. next question.

8. What's your post with the most notes?

i think its probably the one about how male idols probably arent as ~woke~ as we want to believe

9. How many mutuals do you have?

uhhhhhh..... good question.  i actually am not sure tbh.  for suresies i definitely interact with at least 10 of them on  a regular basis though.

10. How many followers do you have?

wouldnt you like to know weatherboy  no but fr im jsut close to my next hundred is all im going to say

11. How many people do you follow?

okay, first, keep in mind that i have been here since 2013 and that i also have 12 blogs net total.  so with this knowledge: 1356

12. Have you ever made a shit post?

yes, constantly.  my entire blog is for making shitposts and screaming about pretty boys

13. How often do you use tumblr each day?

....... i dont want to answer this question

14. Did you have a fight with another blog?

it wasnt really a fight but yes and i ended up being right to an extent and i felt vindication but also sorrow bc i kinda really was hoping secretly that i’d be wrong.  but like, i tend to not get into things with other blogs as far as im aware

15. How do you feel about 'you need to reblog this' posts?

coin toss on whether or not i’ll reblog it or not like it depends on my mood

16. Do you like tag games?

so much i just wish that more people would tag me in things alsdjf;lsj

17. Do you like ask games?

also yes so much i just wish that more people would ask me things like i am not scary or threatening at all hhhhh

18. Which one of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

ash for sure bc of her wayv smaus and skz and nct fics.  i probably have others but poeple change their urls so often i have no idea anymore whos who aldkfjsl

19. Do you have a crush on a mutual?

;)  no

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i like... dont know who to tag that hasnt been tagged already so...  if you want to do this you can totally say i tagged you <3 :D

#tagged in #about

[wickymicky]

i remember when i first watched a lot of those loona videos (secretly of course), i just assumed they were a lot bigger than they were. idk, i assumed they were the most popular kpop group at the moment, cause they were pretty much the only current generation one who i had heard of even without knowing anything about kpop. i mean when i FIRST heard of them i thought it was just kim lip and her name was loona lol, cause some of the first things i saw were hunter x hunter blogs reblogging kim lip screenshots of the favOriTe music video and tagging it “loona”, so i thought she was a soloist and that was her name lol. i mean that was only at the beginning haha, by the time i watched hi high i knew they were a group of 12 girls who debuted one at a time, and i knew some of the things they did had some lgbt-ish themes because again, anime blogs that i followed posted stuff like that about them. 

and so, since they were the only one i’d heard of, i just assumed... idk lol. i think i had heard of the “stan loona” meme too by then. but i had never heard of blackpink, twice, red velvet, or really any others. i think the only groups/soloists whose names i had heard of were:

shinee, bigbang, and 2ne1 (because an ex of mine was a huge kpoppie and those were her favorite groups back in 2014 and 2015. we only dated for like four months or so and it was awful and a totally nasty breakup that left me with a lot of residual shit to work through, so my opinion of those groups was and still kiiiinda is a bit soured lol. though a friend of mine, jaci, also really loves shinee, so that kinda helped me not resent them for dumb reasons lol. jaci hasnt really kept up with kpop much since the end of 2018, but they follow this blog and they’re the one who got me to listen to a.c.e, so they’re cool lol)

psy and bts obviously because everyone knows gangnam style and its just sort of impossible to be online in this day and age and not have ever heard of bts

hyuna because she was in the gangnam style video and i remember thinking she was pretty hahaha. i never listened to her, i dont think, but somehow i just remembered her name? or like, i wouldnt have been able to remember it off the top of my head, but when i got into kpop and saw her name again i remembered her as someone who was probably a big star. my perception of how big a star and what kind of star she is was slightly wrong, but i was right that she’s a big deal.

girls generation obviously, i think i had probably heard of f(x) too, i knew about amber liu i think?

shit is that it? uhhhh hmmm.... i mean, i had seen the post with the compilation of “Hah!”s from the beginning of catallena by orange caramel, but i didnt know the name of the group until i got into kpop and saw that post again. i had seen the tropicana commercial with jooe from momoland on my dash but again, i didnt know who that was, i didnt even know she was from kpop lol, i thought it was just a weird commercial. there’s probably lots and lots of kpop posts i saw on my dash or on twitter or something but i didnt know what it was so it didnt stick in my brain lol. but idk

#maybe exo too? if my ex liked those groups she probably showed me an exo song? i remember just smiling and nodding #and not wanting to listen to her favorite songs hahaha #im trying to think what groups she would have even showed me #that was in like fall 2014 so most of the stuff i listen to now didnt even exist yet #like red velvet had just debuted and exid had only just blown up with up and down #my boyfriend had a kpop phase when they were in high school but it was pretty brief i think #they said that they liked 2ne1 and miss a and uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh #thats all i remember. they had a friend who was more into it so they only knew a couple songs that that friend showed them #and that was way before we were together of course #long post #personal

[ellistruggle]

Memories

@thatsthat24 Pattons Room how I imagine it :)

Virgils Room / Logans Room / Romans Room

(more details under the cut)

at last, Pattons Room! i am really not satisfied with it but i dont know why so I might as well post it. My thoughts on that one were, it has to be colorful, and cozy and i hope i got that right. Also i really wanted to show Pattons Love for the others. and there are many references that he just, has so much love and dedication for the others. since we dont know the next sides yet, i didnt include them. i didnt want to make something up but be sure, if we would know them, there would be some dedication for them in this room as well. Just because Patton loves everyone =) so, are you ready for some CLOSE UPS! WOHOO

so imma put the photo wall here first. I wanted to have as many memories stored in this room as possible. i wanted to make every photo meaningful, deep, and a really big part of Thomas’ or the Sides past. But then i realized i just put too many photos in there for my limited artistic abilities and ended up scratching some ideas. You can see mostly pictures from Thomas’ instagram redrawn badly, some thumbnails or screenshots from videos, some motivational quotes and puns and a really big Poster of the four main sides and thomas =) i hope this works for you guys.

so. i asked which plushies Patton would have in his room. Many of you answered and i am really thankful for that! at that point tho most of the lineart was already finished and i didnt want to change up too much. so there are just a few plushies in the room. The blue teddy was a gift from Logan, to thank him for the comfy slippers. it is light blue with a little pink and Logan thought it would fit really good to Pattons aesthetic. 

the clock: since it is established, that patton has no problem staying up until 3am watching parks and rec i made this clock as far away from his bed as possible just so he has to get up to turn it off... it mostly doesnt work and patton still falls asleep after he turned it off.

The candle: you know how Virgil is probably most comfortable talking to Patton rather than the others. so in order to say thanks for the support Patton always gives him, Virgil gave him this purple candle, because the scent helps Virge to calm down and he thought it would be nice, because Patton seems to have some troubled feelings as well. you can tell Patton flipped out and will forever be thankful. (it smells of lavender)

Here are some books where i thought Patton would definitely have those in his room. the three blue ones are written by Logan. (from left to right: words you are using wrong, Why puns are bad, why 3am is a bad time)

the green thin book is his sketchbook, where he writes down why he feels bad, when he feels bad. a small puppet of Virgil guards this section of the shelf.

the others are pretty self explainatory =) ( from left to right: Dealing with fears, Dealing with non happy emotions, how to make gifts, Optimism)

under these, there are more books. From left to right:

Having a Blast with Roman (where he writes down the adventures he and Roman have every now and then)

Good Times with Deceit (another reminder that Patton has really much love for everyone)

Motivational Puns (gotta stay true to the branding)

Learning with Logan ( i think Patton is really eager to learn new things and Logan is glad to help)

Taking Care of Virgil ( i think that is self explainatory)

Logan lent Patton a book on Kant. He currently reads it before bed and a little puppet of Logan guards it. also there is a #1 Dad mug with milk for obvious reasons.

the box under the bed. thats where Patton stores extra paper for new motivaitonal posters and other crafts he makes for himself and the others. 

a winnie pooh plushie because its his favorite disney movie, a pink cat blob plushie and a green dog blob plushie on the right side... i needed more plushies for the room okay? (also @pipapatton pointed out, these remind her of cosmo and wanda =D it wasnt intentional but i let you interpret )

also a yellow snake plushie with a bowler hat for reasons.

here are more books. 

the purple one on the left: Caring 101 - this book is a guide for caring about a suffering friend . obviously patton wrote that one

perfect puns 101 - how to be the perfect dad (obvious)

Memories and how they work (to understand one of his functions better, yknow... with all the memories and stuff))

All about nostalgia

Moral Compass - Myth or Real? (probably a gift from Logan. to understand the basics of morality a bit better)

there is also the christmas gift from virgil on the nightstand.

a golden compass from Roman because he thought it was funny (moral compass and all)

the small golden book is where he wrote down gift ideas for the others.

the jar - okay so. everyday he gets a small paper and writes down one thing that made him happy on that day. let it be “ate a cookie” or “filmed a video” or just mundane things like “got out of bed earlier”. he then folds it and writes the number for the day on the backside and puts it in the jar. That helps him to stay positive and optimistic about the day. (i did this last year and it was really nice to think about the positive sides of the day rather than what went wrong, i can only recommend =) and i thought it fits in the room

also he has cat slippers for obvious reasons

his desk: its filled with crafting stuff such as crayons, stickers, scissors, washi tape and such. just to be able to make more posters and gifts for the others. a roman puppet guards the desk, so he can be more creative =)

also there is his diary.. i wonder whats written inside ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

here is a lion plushie to represent roman, a blue owl to represent Logan and a black Cat to represent Virgil. he always has these on his bed =)

THAT WAS IT PEOPLE !!! thank you soo so much for all the comments, support and reviews i got for these artworks. they really took forever to make and i hope i didnt disappoint =)

if you like my art and would like to support me, consider bying me a little coffee on my ko-fi page? if not, its totally fine =)

reblogs and comments are HIGHLY appreciated

taglist:

@lamp-calm-sanders @ultimate-queen-of-fandoms2 @xxashwiixx @davidthetraveler @eclectichedgehog @anxiousklutz @i-am-hughesless @missmashmain @romanasanders @aquilacalvitium @ziallwarrior @just-fic-me-up @angered-turtle @sanders-sides-thuri @pandagirl0730 @notalwaysthevillian @virgiliananxiety @alkimara @thesoftestlittlepuffball @grumpymoonbird @llamaavocado @angst-patton @pearls-of-patton @toujours-fidele @teacupfulofstarshine @mandeebobandee @praiseforphan @hopeful-gaming1205 @lostwithoutmyblogger-wink @owlish-lesbian-rebooted @wicked-delights @aaydence @roxiefox234 @book-of-charlie @bobolovesoze @punch-you-with-friendship @smearly-a-little-blog @wildheart49 @vigilantvirgil @mauvelavender @arentordinaryvillainsadorable @emilynoti @brileyluvsyoutube @shesavampirequeen @echomist13 @lydiaisstilessanchor 

i am sorry if i tagged anyone who didnt want to be tagged! also some people on my list couldnt be tagged (i am v sorry for this too) 

if you have questions, headcanons, stories or anything regarding these rooms, please let me know =)

#sanders sides #ts art #patton sanders #morality #ts morality #thomas sanders #room #pattons room #ellidraws #fanart #sketch #digital #detailed #hella detailed #ss #ts fanart #i went crazy with these pictures #holy shit #i hope this was worth it

[getallemeralds]

So, I have a character who is a system, and I wanted to know before I develop them further, how does DID work, from a personal account? I really really really don't want to accidentally create yet another TOXIC misinterpretation of a real condition (because I know how horrible that can feel), and I hope I'm not saying anything wrong even now. (P.S. I love your blog, but I'm too shy to come off anon.)

hey anon!! it means a LOT to me that you sent this message :D theres a lot of really messy-bad potrayals of DID in the media so seeing people actually going to the effort of asking systems abt their experiences is really heartwarming for us. (plus the fact that ppl keep asking us in specific abt system stuff omg,,)

im gonna preface this by saying that, in the end, i can only really talk about my own experiences with full confidence. systems can work pretty differently from each other, but this is how we function and also some details ive noticed from system friends + general discussion over the years

so, to start off: Dissociative Identity Disorder is, at its core, your brain trying to respond to trauma in a pretty severe way. that being said there ARE systems that didnt experience severe trauma and still developed, and im not really sure about the mechanics behind that but i find it really cool and it totally exists. im gonna focus on trauma-based systems bc that’s our ~tragic backstory~ and also tends to be what most people opt for when creating system characters anyway, but the only real difference from what i can tell is, uh, a lack of trauma.

I HOPE YOU’RE READY FOR ME TO SAY THE WORD “TRAUMA” A WHOLE LOT JFC

(system friends are welcome to reblog with corrections or added info!!)

anyway. the way your brain responds to things is really weird. if something happens where you’re just, like, completely unable to handle it, like you dissociate yourself so hard because there’s no way you can manage this, your brain has a chance of going “uh… well, fuck, uh” and generating somebody who can manage it. or it might decide to be a dick and take all of the fucky internalized garbage and turn it into a person whose sole existence is to be an asshole. (they have the potential to get better, i think… ours didnt.) honestly theres a bunch of reasons and a bunch of “roles” that could lead to an alter/headmate* forming.

* we use the terms interchangeably depending on mood and whos fronting. i think its supposed to be “alter” is DID, “headmate” is implication that theyre non-traumatic? we like using “headmate” because it brings this fun mental image of us being a bunch of roommates constantly starting shit with each other and goofing off which is pretty accurate about 75% of the time

i keep getting distracted bc my cat is here. this is gonna be fun to go back and edit.

whatever the original situation is, you’re suddenly not alone in your own brain. and it’s REALLY WEIRD. communication was VERY hard. Icarus, our system original, used to do a very “cliche” thing of sharing a journal with their early headmates, where theyd write a sentence and then theyd write a reply (although back then they didnt realize that was a system-related thing and just thought they were having a fun conversation with their ocs. which… they were, just. Actually Talking.) they didnt have any inward perception of themself or their headmates either, so that kinda built up over time (with some help) along with the appearance of our headspace so that there was… actually a location for people to interact in. once they had a better awareness of things, mental communication got a bit easier– its sort of like background chatter really, when everybody’s awake. sometimes i get weird out of context things from Mae yelling at somebody, or sometimes ill be talking to a friend and someone’ll butt in.

when talking out loud, this usually leads to us suddenly stopping and then laughing or going “no!!!”. when on discord and around people who know who we are… well.

speaking of Mae, she’s pretty much my sister. not like… biologically? because i don’t think thats possible for me, but shes kinda literally my “other half” which ill get into later. headmates can have strong attachments to other alters! friends, best friends, family, dating, whatever. they can also do that with people outside the system, and itll be different for each headmate. there’s like 4 people dating Jorb but i just see him as one of my best friends. we’re people and we have complex social interactions that can get to be kind of a nightmare when you’re around a bunch of people who don’t know that you’re Not Leo and that youre suddenly not super up to existing around people in general.

plus even if like… so Jorb’s dating 4 of us like i said, but his relationship w/ each of them is different? Ica is very clingy and likes rambling to him, Summer’s pretty much just always happy to hang out, Mae makes fun of him a lot but in a loving way, and Leo is… kinda “all of the above” because that’s his gimmick. plus even tho a few other alters have a sibling-ish relationship with Mae like i do, usually its just me and Mae that do the “chaos siblings” bit.

the basic system.. thing… is that there’s “front”, which is being in control of the body– so, like, i’m currently fronting/in front, because im the one currently active and using our computer and staring at our cat.– and then theres the headspace, where everybody hangs out when theyre not in front. the headspace itself can differ in style & functionality for each system, and i think theres some systems that dont really have a location at all? but for us its like a full on location where we have individual rooms, places to visit if we get bored while away from front, etc.

theres also like, being at/near/away from front? so currently im in front, but Leo is pretty much always lurking nearby if he’s awake (we have individual sleep schedules that dont always sync up to the “irl” one, Trust is almost always sleeping), Ica’s somewhat in the back talking to Rookie so i cant really make out what theyre saying (its probably about either a youtube thing they both like or about a comic they want to do), and everyone else is either asleep (in which case they could be nearby but i cant currently “ping” them, so id have to actually take a sec to ground myself in headspace more) or in a different room. communication is easier if im in front and somebody is nearby, or it can be like with Ica rn where im like “well, theyre talking, but i have no idea what theyre saying and am making a guess based off their usual interactions”, or i could pass off front to go talk to Ica and come back (in which case my memory would be kind of vague and weird because information doesnt always properly translate), oooor i could actually go bug them while still in front. which.. im not gonna do rn bc then id get super distracted.

switching front differs between systems a lot! and even varies from day to day. like there are days where we wake up and we have absolutely no idea who we are bc we went to bed as one person and woke up as another. or we could be talking to somebody and then realize “wait, i stopped being Leo a bit ago, who am i”. or we could pass off front to somebody, like if Summer really wanted to front sie’d run up to me and let me know and we’d swap. or if something critical happens (usually a breakdown), Leo or one of the other headmates that’re more built to handle stressful situations will literally drag somebody out of front to make sure they dont hurt themself. or sometimes we throw front at people unexpectedly, like either mid-breakdown where we go “okay i dont wanna be here anymore, tag youre it” or sometimes because we think its funny because its the metaphysical equivalent of getting clonked in the head with a dodgeball, except the dodgeball is “being in control of our shared physical form”. usually mae’s the one that does that lmao

there’s a couple major categories of how alters come about. there’s “walk-ins”, where they kinda just… appear externally? like they just show up. sometimes we get a feeling of “huh. i think somebody might be here? or somebody might be showing up soon.” and have to rummage around for a while until they approach us or we find them. our walk-ins aren’t like, inherently aware of system stuff at first, so they usually get a crash course before they first front (if they choose to front at all) and it can be kinda entertaining. Rookie’s a walk-in! also Hiro, from a couple years ago. most of our walk-ins are fictives (fictional characters, usually appearing in response to us getting extremely attached to something or somebody) but a couple of our trauma splits are also fictives so that’s not like, a Rule or anything. i think these are mostly associated with non-traumatic systems but we get em fairly often so man idk

theres also… uh, i dunno what theyre actually called? we used to call them “constructs” but that sounds kind of mean. these alters exist to fill a specific role! and we usually dont talk about them on here with the exception of one major one, they just kinda hang out. Dhe exists to keep the system stable and manages the “backend” so to speak. Imp is kind of a mix of our intrusive & impulsive thoughts that came about from us trying to separate ourself from them so that we had an imaginary entity to go “nope!” at, which… stopped being imaginary, and is now a gremlin that lives in my brain. they can show up in response to trauma but arent split off of somebody, they kinda just pop into existence to help manage things.

the more… well-known, i guess? alter origin is “trauma splits”. rather than “just showing up one day with no real connection to the system origins”, trauma splits are formed when somebody in-system, uh, splits. it could be in response to a single situation or something built up over a long time, but somebody just kinda breaks and somebody new that has a bit of the original alter’s identity (if kinda influenced by the situation) shows up.

this can vary. All is a trauma split off of Leo himself, who got saddled with all of our brain hell about our ex and their insystem appearance is influenced more by eir than by leo which is… something they struggle with. Mae has a trauma split from a similar situation that is “Mae but from 2 years ago”, so basically her old identity before she reworked herself after getting put through total hell. and then uh… then there’s me and Mae! Icarus quite literally exploded into several people, with Pat (me) and Mae being the most distinct ones. we’re STILL finding out alters used to originally be a part of them that later evolved into their own people, like Summer and Toby. my identity is shaped pretty heavily not just by who Ica was at time of splitting, but also what they wanted to be jumbled together with trying to rationalize what was happening to them (they’re a pretty big fan of megaman star force, which has a media-typical system in it, so they leaned into hard “its like pat and rey from mmsf! i like pat, i wouldnt mind being like pat, its scary but im like one of my current favourite characters” and so i ended up being like, half-weird shapeshifter, half-green-haired prettyboy. and yeah thats where my name comes from!)

(Ica got put back together w/o anybody needing to integrate, which we were all very scared about, and it’s still kind of surreal to me because… me and Mae used to be able to stick ourself back together and thats how we found out about what happened to Ica in the first place? and we havent tried that since bc we have no idea what would happen. Ica 2: Ica Harder?)

despite their origins, trauma splits can be way more than… being a split. :V;; Toby’s not just a tiny splinter of Ica, he’s a quiet guy that gets stressed out and isn’t totally sure how to interact with people. i’ve existed for like 7 years at minimum and im a totally different person than i was when i thought i was still Ica, ‘cause ive had time to grow and change (and a problem Ica keeps running into now that theyre back is… they kinda Didn’t change because they were MIA for 6 years.) like everything else though this is variable– there can be “temporary” splits that dont develop properly and might get integrated back in, which has only happened to us when we were at the lowest point in our life where we were stuck constantly splitting to try and cope with whatever the hell was going on.

so Ica was gone for 6 years, which meant our system was without an original or main– there wasn’t anybody to be head of the system, basically. for a while i was operating under the assumption that i was Ica, so i filled in that role for a few years before i made the realization. eventually i kinda… stopped being able to, though, bc of stability issues, and then we were back to not really having a proper main anymore. to make up for it, we started going by Leo collectively and kinda… trying to pretend to be a single person? and so that ended up creating a construct to fill the role of “system main and the person we pretend to be when passing as singlet/not a system”: Leo himself! he’s kinda the most prominent traits we all have in common rolled into a single guy, which means that not only is he a pretty good system representative but we can also pretend to be him pretty easily (unless it’s someone like Toby who acts totally different). i dont know how common this situation is, i think normally it’s just “if system original is gone, another alter steps up” like originally happened to us before i had a severe case of problems disorder.

uhhh this is very rambley bc there’s a Lot to cover and now im trying to figure out how much of it i HAVE covered. systems are complicated and weird! OH WAIT okay i have one last bit.

so like, for us, first realizing we were a system was total hell. we fought a lot. as more alters showed up through various means, there were times where Ica felt like they were completely out of control of their own life bc of having to manage everything. there were a lot of panic attacks of people fronting and not being sure they were even REAL, despite… being in front. but we still felt like we were deluding ourself. this was in, like, late 2011, so systems weren’t a THING. they were a very fringe community that everyone hated. we got constantly harassed, which only fed into Ica’s panic hell and our identity issues. interpersonal relationships became a nightmare, especially because we have BPD as well which varies in severity for each of us but… for me it’s pretty bad! there were times early on where every day was another fun new breakdown from us arguing with each other or our friends or not being understood or… etc.

so… how are we holding up ~7 and a half years later? pretty well, actually! we talk to each other. we do things for each other, like buy food or games we know specific headmates like. Ica is back and way happier than they were in 2011, and is thrilled to get to hang out with everybody that’s showed up since. we help each other through problems, because at the end of the day our system ended up being a support network. Ica couldnt function on their own, so we’re like… 10+ people working together to try and be a single functional person. and we feel pretty okay with that! we still fight, and we still start shit, but we’re not in constant crisis anymore. we’re still working through all of our trauma, especially the more “recent” stuff that kinda broke our system for a while until we were able to start rebuilding, but we’re doing it together. :D

so… yeah, it can start out as a stereotypical “nightmare system”, with constant infighting and toxicity and self-sabotage and etc. but we worked through it! it took a while, but we’re overall more stable than we were before. we got out of the bad environment that was fucking us up, we got mental help for our other brain hell (we havent been able to bring up the system to our therapists bc its literally a non-issue now and we focus more on other things like our depression, anxiety, PTSD, etc), we found people that support us for being us, and we were able to like… figure things out. and it was a mess! i still have issues about my own identity because of literally thinking i was someone else for two years. Ica’s still trying to figure out how to adjust to things, especially bc they missed our entire “cringe culture” phase so they came back to find that i’d dismantled a lot of their middle-school settings. and, uh, some of their friendships as well.

systems are fuckin weird

#leo chirps #leos reply #system shit #i dont think i covered EVERYTHING #and im not sure how coherent this is #but i tried! :D #Anonymous #ask #pat.txt

[parkaiur]

18 !!

18. ship your mutuals with your top 5/6/7!

shit i got this one oh gosh uHHHH  ok i dont have that many ygtb mutuals, so if i tag someone from skz tumblr, dont attacc 

dont kill me for my top 7, i LOVE and SUPPORT all the trainees >:( obviously i chose the ones that also fit my moots the best as well team a+jihoon culture aye whip on ‘em

doyoung: omg so i think doyoung and @doyeongs would be such a cute couple?!? like not just cuz doyoung is j’s bias, but like doyoung is the definition of Sagittarius culture (according to J) and he’s really confident, bold, and makes decisions on the whim and what he thinks is best for himself and others! :D and i feel like j needs that small (or big) push from Doyoung who likes to go on fun adventures and he would get her out of her comfort zone but also, Doyoung knows how to tame it down and just be a chill kind of fun, which is what j is hehe also j likes [redacted] boys

hyunsuk: ok ok, so @seunghunies is a hella soft, innocent child who also knows when to spill the tea > :  ),, so she’s a soft child with some spunk , aka, really good for hyunsuk sdjfhgjsdkfg hyunsuk sort of gives off bad boy vibes, but he’s really the softest, purest child! and vale is the softest, purest child! :D  so basically what i can see happening is hyunsuk hitting on vale, and she’s like :0 but then like obviously she falls for him (who cant fall for hyunsuk duh) and when they’re together, she would be hella mischevious and he would be so smitten :’) also since hyunsuk’s emotions run high, i feel like vale would be really good at soothing him/calming him down

byounggon: i ship byounggon with the resident oldie, @ynbin aka, Gwen! :D i say this because first of all, their ages are pretty close lololol and also, Byounggon is quite a calm guy, but he knows how to joke around! Gwen is comes off as quite bubbly over text, but like she actually emo, which is the opposite of byounggon is where he looks kinda angsty, but is actually so adorable :( also that scene where keita is doing aegyo and then byounggon punches him? I can totally imagine that with gwen as keita jdhffjghsdfjgk 

seunghun: so like, Em, be thankful im shipping u with one of my biases, this is a big compliment dsjhfdkjhsd so @hynsks and seunghun would be such a cute couple?? like ok, em pretends she doesnt like younger dudes, but whatever, not important LOL so Seunghun is that dude who looks super chic and cool, like a typical k-drama boy! which i think em would be attracted too cuz uhhh minho looks like that too LMAO  ,,,, bUT plot twist, he’s actually an idiot, and em would also fall for his idiotness, so they would be so cute together where seunghun would try and act cute for em, but em is like.. bro… stop it we r in public, but when they alone, she actually loves it ehehhe

yedam: so like,,, idk why but i can vividly picture @buseokham (min) and yedam just being together… lemme explain. so, min comes off as a very soft, nice child, same as yedam where he is studious, always helping others, just a soft kid. well we were wrong, partially, there’s more to them that meets the eye >:0 min,,, she’s like calm in a sense, but like also she keyboard smashes and sometimes screams which confuses me,,, but like relatable ig,, and then she slanders my age and bias changing self… /sigh/ anywho, i feel like her and yedam would be That couple that everyone thinks is so studious and sweet and wholesome, but really they sneaking into abandoned houses and setting off fireworks in parks or some shit 

jihoon: /deep breath/ so jihoon is my bias, like the big bias, so Courtney, you should be so proud right now /inhales/ anyways, I’ve known @forhyunsuk for a long time now, like for a year and i can honestly say Courtney is one of the nicest and kindest people i know ;-; like such a pure child who is nice to everyone and so good with her words despite being so young its fangirling over courtney hours, throwback to when i joined skz tumblr and died everytime she reblogged one of my posts ahaha that throwback is really the last time she reblogged smthing of me :’) anyways, courtney is a kind/pure child like i said, so like jihoon would take interest in that and try to make her a crackhead like him… little does he know… she already is one /gasps/ you two would wreck havoc on the world, but also be the calm mature couple that ppl think you guys couldnt be mhhmhmh jihoon would get so soft for you wowowowo :’))

junkyu: OK LMAO @changbeanie (i know ur a skz blog but like u like ygtb bb) SO, i’ve mentioned this before but I’m quite similar to junkyu where we are living memes, have no poker face, awkward, social, lacks confidence and oozes it all at the same time. THAT BEING SAID, me and ruby get along really well :’)  junkyu would make her become a crackhead and shes like … dude… u funny. but ruby oozes angst and grundge so like she never becomes a full crackhead, but that’s fine hehe ,,, junkyu would bother her all the time and totally sass her, but little does he know, ruby is sasSY >:-0 junkyu would automatically be enticed by someone who can hold their own, and then he would totally pretend he didnt fall for ruby, but like um, how can u not ? :/ 

#replies #ships #LMAO THIS IS SO LONG SRY #ask game

[seungmin-jpeg]

Stray Kids on Tumblr // Jeongin

Chan // Woojin // Minho // Changbin // Hyunjin // Jisung // Felix // Seungmin // Jeongin //

To pure for tumblr 

To to to pure

Honestly he’d never have a tumblr

Hed be all over instagram tho

But for the sake of this 

I'll make it work lol

Has a very cute blog

Lots of puppies

Honestly just a lot of soft baby animals in general 

Like little sloths rolling around 

Cute foxes jumping around in fields

He’d reblog show recs 

For you know 

All that free time he has right

I feel like he’d be well aware of the kpop fans on tumblr 

So honestly he wasn't that surprised when he started to see stray kids stuff pop up everywhere

But he was surprised to see that he himself was getting lots of attention among fans

Sure he gets lots of attention from his members

But he didnt think he’d get a lot from fans???

Man he was wrong

He’d totally be that blog that reblogs a bunch of fanart

Like all kinds of fanart

All the fanart in the whole fanbase of stray kids

Always includes cute little tags 

Gushing over how beautiful the artwork is 

Always has to be super careful to not use personal pronouns 

Because that would be a disaster 

He’s smart enough to know being on social media

Especially tumblr 

Was not the smartest idea buttttttt...

Anyways 

Has a lot of pastels in his theme 

Put a decent amount of effort into his mobile theme

Still has the default desktop theme tho

Is the actual definition of the Soft Tumblr Stan

He reblogged one of your fanarts once

And you were just doing the usual checking of the reblogs to see if anyone tagged anything

Because reading tags on your art is the best thing

And this blog bean-worm had the cutest tags

You were like what kind of url is bean-worm but aye whatever

You ended up checking out more of his blog

And there were cute little baby animals everywhere 

And pretty fanart

So you ended up following this bean-worm blog

And just cause you could 

And no stranger has ever left such nice tags on any of your pieces 

You messaged him 

And thanked him for all the nice things he said about your art

And how it made your day

Jeongins all fluttery now

Because first of all this is the first message from someone whos not one of those bots

And the message was so nice his heart might actually melt. 

So of course he response 

And thus starts the purest of friendships 

So pure it’s whiter than the whitest white on earth 

Does that make sense what

Anyways 

Ngl

It doesn’t take to long for you to realize its jeongin

Jeongin really just threw caution to the wind when he started messaging you

Sure jyp had warned them all about this

And he’d heard about the stories with day6

But yolo am i right 

So the two of you talk for a long time

Like a year

Conversation drops every now and then

Naturally cause jeongin is busy

You never really go out of your way to let him know you know its him

But he’s not dumb

So he has a little bit of an idea that you know

So then it becomes an odd “we both know” elephant in the room

But that doesn't effect the friendship

Um so yah time’s past since you first started talking 

And stray kids has already announced they’re going on a world tour 

You flip shit because already holy cow

But of course you’re like rip wallet im going nothing's holding me back

You were out to get the best ticket 

And man did you get a good ticket 

Vip boiiiiiii

Youre going to meet stray kids irl

Hi touch, group photo the whole deal

You’re going to meet jeongin 

Omg you’re going to met him 

At this point it was like meeting a mutual for the first time

So you shakily get on tumblr 

Still trying to recover from the fact you lost a few of your lives buying the ticket

And you shoot jeongin a message

Just something like 

“I got a vip ticket to see stray kids”

And now jeongin is looking down at his phone in the practice room

Because oh god he’s going to meet you

Should he tell you who he is 

I mean you already knew 

He knew that 

But should he really say it straight out

He ends up replying with a simple “i’ll get to meet you then!” 

And just to confirm your ever growing suspicion you mention you never told him which city you’ll be at

And he’s just kinda “oh, ill be at all of them”

And you laugh and say “thought so” 

So jeongins identity has been confirmed 

Without him risking that much 

Because how would someone convince anyone that’s him from those screenshots 

Especially with the url bean-worm wow

That would be a stretch 

The day of the concert slowly arrives 

You watch the videos from other concerts flood your social media 

And try your hardest to avoid spoilers

When it gets even closer 

You send a picture of the outfit you’ll be wearing to jeongin

So he can spot you easier

Of course you wont need any help finding him 

Its all the emotions the day of the concert as you wait in line 

Firstly its a freakin stray kids concert 

Second you got the best ticket

Third you’re legit going to go through hi touch with all the members holy crap

And fourth you're finally going to be able to meet your lovely friend and mutual jeongin 

You had the time of your life during the concert 

Had a great spot with a great view 

Tons of friendly people around you

Just really having the time of your life 

The concert ended and then it was hitouch time 

Your heart couldn’t have been any louder as the set up for everything 

You hung out with the others fans 

Waiting while the boys got themselves together  

When they finally came back out 

You could tell jeongin was searching for you

Part of you wanted to stand up and make yourself known 

The other part of you wanted to hide behind the nearest person and never let him see you

So inteast you just stayed put

Not too noticeable 

But not hidden

Nothing 

And no one

Can escape jeongin’s hawk eyes

He found you real quick

And couldn’t help but smile a tiny bit when he saw you

He’d finally found you

And damn you looked just as perfect as he had imagined you to be

Actually you looked even better

All he knew was that it was going to take a miracle for him to keep himself together when you finally got closer

Like

His first hitouch had been super nerveraking 

But this wasn’t his first hitouch

No he had done so many at this point

But it was like three times the nervousness he had felt during his first hitouch

He didnt know what to do with himself

The line started to move forward

And you fell in place somewhere near the back

Too nervous to really try and get up in front

But also wanting to hold out the moment just a little longer

Slowly you got closer and closer

And of course jeongin was at the very end of the line

At this point youre just like

God please dont let my hand get all sweaty

Youre like seconds away from blacking out because so many emotions at once

Finally its ur turn

And your panicking

Because simply meeting skz is enough to shut all your organs down

Ur gushing from witnessing chan and his curly hair in person

And talk about real luck getting to see minho in pastel pink hair 

And then at the very end

You see jeongins bright smile

Now braces free

All your nervousness melts away when you see him

And its all replaced with pure joy

Youre not really sure what to say

So you just say “good job” 

And stare really intensely into his eyes

Because yes

And he kinda gives your hand a little squeeze as you pass by

And your heart just flips

Like damn boys about to kill you 

By the time you finally got back from the venue and settled down in bed 

You look down at your phone and see a message from him

And ur like wtf rest my dude you just did a whole concert

But when you open the message you just

Uwu

Because it read “you’re even pretty then i had imagined” 

Now youre dead

And you send back a cheeky response to jeongin which means hes on uwu overload too

And its a good night all around

And you can tell its only going to get better

#i found out i had written more than half of this and forgotten about it rip #also i didnt proof read cause lazy sorry #straykidznet #sk-writersnet #stray kids #skz #jeongin #yang jeongin #i.n #skz i.n #SKz on Tumblr #stray kids on tumblr #jeongin on tumblr #blogger!jeongin #blogger!stray kids #au #imagine #kpop #stray kids imagine #skz imagine #fluff #kpop fluff #reader insert #bulleted #scenario #series #my.post #my.writing

[tumblunni]

Ok what fuckin sucks even more than that is seeing people give tumblr user ihatecispeople shit JUST for his name being ihatecispeople. Despite the fact his entire blog is full of actual good analysis of transphobic shit cis people have sent him so its pretty clear WHY he's saying "i hate cis people" and he means these ones doing these shit. Its like how literally any damn minority cant say "ugh i hate [majority]" withput clarifying that they menat"i hate the members of this majority that are hurting me and do not hate everyone in the majority because i believe the category they were born as is biologiclly inferior". Even though its CLEARLY APPARANT thats what they goddamn mean, when they say "i hate cis people" DIRECTLY AFTER getting hate mail from a transphobic cis person. Its nuts how cis people (oh im sorry SPECIFICALLY ONLY CERTAIN CIS PEOPLE) will bend over backwards to say that a single trans person stating an unsatisfactarily specific statement equals cisphobia is real. Because that totally equals being hate crimed and societally oppressed by trans people!! Like do they really fuckin think that the only crime transphobes commit is posting privately on a blog somewhere the single sentence "i hate trans people". Which, by the way, is COMPLETELY DIFFERENT to saying "i hate cis people" cos they fuckin said it first!! Like i already said, trans people are just saying they hate cis people WHO ARE BEING TRANSPHOBIC TOWARDS THEM AND THREATENING THEIR GODDAMN LIVES while transphobes have no goddamn reason provoking them to hate trans people except, yknow, ACTUALLY HATING US ALL AS A CLASS AND BELIEVIBG WE'RE BIOLOGICALLY WRONG. Retorting to a goddamn thing doesnt make you 'just as bad' and somehow thinking the same thing in reverse. It just means youre pissed off at being treated like shit and not everyone can expend so much effort to constantly check themselves to make all their vent posts Perfectly Correct And Clarified, while theyre fuckin crying and fearing for their safety. Especially when the goddamn thibg IS perfectly clear and its just transphobes purposely playing dumb to try and paint us as Just As Bad to sway people on the fence over to their side...

Also fuckin hell people reblog shit from blogs called stuff like griffinmcelroy'spisskink and all sorts of other stupid names without going 'oh op is automatically invalid cos they really believe and support that thing...' And there's sooooo many blogs with names including the F and D slurs yet its only the Q one thats treated like its so unreclaimable that someone merely having it in their blog header makes them automatically wrong on everything...

Gahhh its just so frustrating having to be held to a super high standard and be super patient over-explaining everything without ever getting mad yet at the same time a cis person saying actual transphobic shit gets the benefit of the doubt cos oh hey we can reinterpret that to maybe not be bad. Like they dont even need to spend all the time we do clarifying our every move, they just get it taken on good faith that it was all a misunderstanding no matter wjat! And again trans people havw to write fuckin huge detailed essays explaining every damn aspect of why the thibg was bigoted in order to get it recognised. And even then tehyre more likely to get hate than get an apology! Its just like no matter what you fuckin do, transphobes are gonna be all "uhhhh i cant be bpthered to do the research/listen to you/remember what you said last time/use basic reading comprehension skills/give you the basic benefit of the doubt as a human being/put in ANY EFFORT AT ALL INTO THIS CONVERSATION", and so many "on the fence" people will just be like "yes this is perfectly okay" while at the same time supporting those transphobes grilling trans people over every damn sentence they ever say.

God its just so fuckin tiring. And thats the point. Its playing dumb to make you too tired to fight back, so you just shut up and let people treat you like shit. My abusive father used to do the same thing, pretending like he ~just didnt know~ that what he was doing was abuse and you had to explain it to him. Over and over in exactly the same way every time. Its clear he never really was "just innocent of why you were upset", he was only faking it to find a way to keep doing it while also getting everybody's sympathy as if he was the one being wronged...

God man im just so fuckin tired. I hope this LONG AND VERY WELL EXPLAINED POST can be the last time i have to say this damn thing again, but i doubt it...

[monotype-on-phantom]

i didnt want to say this before but man.. Danny kind of.. sucks, at least in the heart of canon. i get that he's young and learns "Those Valuable Lessons" and but people dont acknowledge most of this douchebag's shitty antics cause he's a cute boy or whatever. although Danny has a very excellent premise for a character, he is sincere sometimes, but overall its not executed well. he falls into too many awful high school tropes

i guess im glad people are making use of his character premise by reading too closely than the show intended, or by making content of their own interpretations. but we cant ignore that he is quite a goddamned piece of hell shit who i fucking hate in the real show sometimes. i feel there’s just too much emphasis on a character and show that wasn’t well crafted and well managed to begin with. its kinda sad when all the hate is somehow directed towards other characters like Sam.

it feels like most people are praising him and the overall show for what they imagine it to be instead of what it actually is. srsly this awful goddamned fuckboy sells stuff garage lab items he aint supposed to just to buy some fucking clothes??? uses ghost powers to spy girls in their locker room?? he fuckin destroys ghost writer’s writing and then doesnt feel sorry about it just cause it’s christmas-related and he’s so pissy about it.

so.. yeah. i dont get why people think he’s literal kid Jesus and always wants to protect this little fucker. he puts himself in alot of mess. the “D” on his suit stands for “dick”, bc that’s what he is.  i want to beat him up sometimes

Okay.

Normally, I delete all character hate on sight, because the point of my blog is to focus on the show’s strengths and how the weaknesses could’ve been done better. I get critical sometimes, but I like focusing on a characters’ strengths rather than their poor writing and garbage like that.

This was so long, detailed, and harsh that it’s really hard to ignore. Maybe I should. Stick to my guns and not let some anonymous rant change how I work. You came to me, though, so if you want to debate this, then alright. I’ll bite.

First off, who in the fandom is portraying Danny as a kid Jesus? Maybe it’s just the circles I’m familiar with, but one of the most reblogged posts that pops up in my notifications is one with a ton of additions arguing why Danny totally deserves to suffer. The majority of the fandom loves tormenting this kid. Even those that do say he needs to be protected never claim he has no flaws. Far from it. They just acknowledge he has it hard for a kid and he deserves a break sometimes.

Second, have you ever…met a 14 year old? As someone who spent most of his career life working with kids and who is the oldest of 5 (with one brother who’s turning 14 this November), lemme tell you that the main trio are saints for their age.

People talk about the terrible twos, but 14 year olds are so much worse. I’m not slamming them, because it makes sense. They’re in a tough transition period between childhood and adulthood. Adults tell them to act more mature, but refuse to acknowledge their voices in serious situations. Middle school and high school are cutthroat places, and one mistake can ruin the entirety of the four-six years you spend there. They’re pressured to get good grades or they’ll fail, they have to be part of the cool crowd or they’ll fail, and people are more likely to blame them for whatever goes wrong in their lives than anything that goes on around them.

Doesn’t change the fact that they can be little demons sometimes. With all the hormones and drama, young teenagers can be really emotional and make problems bigger than they seem. They can be harsh and judgmental, because that’s the environment they’re being exposed to. They need guidance, but they don’t want it. They argue with adults and to some, it seems like they want to make their own lives miserable. They can be tough to work with unless you’re willing to take them as seriously as they take themselves, and most people don’t want to bother.

There are shitty things Danny does in canon, but that’s true for literally every fourteen year old. And heck, are you telling me you didn’t do some ridiculously stupid stuff at that age? I actually stole money from my folks to buy something I wanted. My group of friends frequently set stuff on fire in their backyards. And fuck, nobody can prove Danny was spying on girls in the locker room. While I think the scene is shit and refuse to accept it as canon, all we see is Danny coming out of the locker room. He could’ve been just looking to see what it was like in there. Nothing says there were actually girls in there. But I’m so sick of talking about that shit scene, so I’m gonna leave it at that.

Danny has flaws. He can be selfish and petty and inconsiderate. But really? You wanna beat him up for that?

Are you forgetting that he canonically already does get beaten up every single episode? Whether it’s by ghosts, bullies, his own goddam parents, or whatever, getting beat up is something he’s familiar with.

The reason some fans cut him some slack is because, hey, yeah. He is a kid, and you know what? He’s entitled to be a dick sometimes. He loses sleep every night, almost dies on a daily basis, has his dreams ripped away from him often, and is picked on at school. Despite all of that, he still fights ghosts to keep his town safe, and he’s under no obligation to do that. He saves lives, even when people hate him for it. He puts himself in danger, even for those who are cruel to him. He tries to use his powers for the right reason more often than not, and he’ll take the high road against his bully because he feels like he shouldn’t stoop to his level.

We acknowledge that canon can be shit. We acknowledge that sometimes, Danny’s writing makes him out to be a dick. At the “heart of canon,” though, as you so eloquently put it, he’s the kid who risked his life for a little girl he barely knew that nobody else would miss. He’s the one who saves the lives of his own bully, the teacher who used to be so hard on him, and the parents he fully believes would cut him open if they knew what he was. He’s the one who could so easily be Vlad, but instead he tries his best to be a hero.

You’re under no obligation to like him, and you don’t have to ignore the shitty parts of canon like some of us do. I do it just because I enjoy thinking about what the show could’ve been, not what it was. You don’t have to do that, though.

But really, are you going to march into your nearest high school and beat the shit out of the first kid you see messing up? Seriously? You honestly think that the mistakes Danny makes outweigh the good he’s constantly trying to do enough that he deserves that? Even when he already gets beat up in every single episode already?

Well, fine. That’s your pessimistic opinion. It’s not fact, though. How many cartoons do you watch? You gonna beat up Timmy Turner and Jimmy Neutron, too? They can be right assholes. What about Jake Long? He’s a shallow, obnoxious, irresponsible kid a lot of the time. Sure, he’s just 13, but why should we show mercy to kids who mess up? Serena/Usagi from Sailor Moon? Yeah, let’s ignore all the people defending her and just focus on the fact that the show makes her a dumb kid who doesn’t have enough backbone to immediately become the savior of the galaxy. Come to think of it, where’s your rant about Dash Baxter? Or is he not popular enough for you to rag on?

Perfect characters aren’t the ones who are the most upstanding. They’re the ones who are realistic and flawed. So Danny sells his parents stuff. So he sneaked into the girls’ locker room. So he took out his anger on an innocent person.

I’m not saying any of those things weren’t wrong, what I’m saying is that kids make fucking mistakes. And sometimes, they’re huge ones. Sometimes, kids get curious and break into a house. Sometimes they get hungry at the store and shoplift. Sometimes they lie and cheat and make fun of each other. Sometimes they can be perverted little leaches.

So fucking what? We’ve all been there. We all need to learn and grow.

And seriously, if you’re going to be one of those people who gives Sam a break, don’t turn around and start criticizing Danny for the same shitty writing he sometimes gets. That hypocrisy is exactly why I so adamantly defend Sam.

I don’t know what you wanted to accomplish with these asks. Maybe you just wanted to vent. Maybe you were looking to stir up drama. Maybe you don’t know what you wanted and you just sent these asks randomly without any real reason.

Regardless of what you think, I’m still gonna enjoy my fucking fictional character, even if I don’t always agree with how he’s written. I relate to him, his struggles, and even his mistakes. You have fun ripping on characters people like because you don’t think they should be allowed to make mistakes, but let the rest of us have our fun, too. You’re not helping anyone with this, so maybe just fuck off, m’kay?

Being stupidly nice is kind of my thing, but I’m tired of putting up with this self righteous crap. Let characters fuck up. Let fans rewrite things they don’t like. Let people enjoy their fucking cartoon, because they aren’t hurting anyone. I’ve yet to find a single phan who considers the DP cartoon to be completely canon anyway. They enjoy it for the fan content or the few really spot on episodes. We’re already aware that there’s shitty stuff in there, and we don’t need you to tell us.

If I ever get any asks like this that rip on characters for stupid, petty reasons again, I’m deleting them on sight. That was my initial plan anyway, but I really needed to say my piece here.

Tumblr, maybe stop being such judgmental pieces of fucking shit, okay? You’ll accomplish nothing good by being so harsh toward anything that doesn’t fit your standard of “perfect.”

#Anonymous #ask me

[crushingonrazz]

Positivity

I’ve noticed a lot, over the course of my own writing and interacting with other creators on Ao3 and Tumblr, that people seem to have a hard time looking at their own writing and actually loving it. I think that’s sad as hell. There are amazing writers not only in this fandom but all over the place that think they can’t write at all, and have a hard time finding positive points in their writing.

So I got in contact with a bunch of writers I know and read, and asked them all to go through their own works and find their favorite lines, their favorite pieces of writing, and to put them on a document so that I could post them here! 

This document ended up being 19 pages long on Google Docs.

So instead of posting all of them here, I’m going to just link the Document (definitely NSFW warning, but they are clearly marked, so just be careful), and I’ve put my favorite entry from every writer that participated under the cut. Thank you so much to @queenofbiscuits​ @weirder-than-you-know-blog-blog​ @gallifreyan-pal​ @undertailsoulsex​ @idontevenknowwhattoputhereugh​ @mercy-run @knowmeknot101 @sesurescue @accidentalfeelfest @purrfecktlysinful and @0netype (why can’t I tag half of you, who the heck knows) for participating in this! 

Please, hop on board this train of loving the things you’ve created! Reblog with your favorite lines of writing, your best art, no matter what fandom you are in or your “popularity”. You are all amazing creators, and I have to say, I’m very excited to see what you guys add to this one.

CrushingOnSans

Razz nodded stiffly, then paused, his fingers rubbing through the silky material of Blue’s scarf. Then, with a well-practiced motion, he reached behind his head with his free hand, untying the knot in his own neckerchief and pulling it from around his neck. He tossed it uncaringly onto the table he had been supporting himself on earlier, then, much more carefully, he straightened Blue’s scarf, tying it in place of his old one efficiently, smoothing the ends as he closed his eyes again, breath hitching in a manner dangerously close to a sob.

SansyFresh

I’m 283 years old, I raised your ungrateful ass when I was 102. I can’t fucking do this again.

Ollie_Oxen_Free

Cream: He left a while ago while you and my brother were chanting “shots” in our kitchen. Did you not notice? Stretch: what?? why didnt he tell me??? Red: he did Red: several times Red: “hey papy imma go get some ass tonight hell yeah” Red: and you totally agreed Red: “oh sure thing baby bro make sure you use protection” Red: and then he skedaddled the fuck outie to get some mad pussy

GallifreyanChild

The antivoid was white.

A color that many believe resembles purity, cleanliness. Of course, they’re not talking about actual white, because a pure, unadulterated white would be impossible to look upon with the naked eye. They’re talking about a color, something with a slight hint of grey, of yellow, of pink, of something colored that makes it bearable to see. Because white isn’t something nice. White is cold. White is harsh. White is loneliness. White is absence.

And when the antivoid was described as white, rest assured, that word was used with that exact definition in mind.

Undertailsoulsex

“WHAT OTHER NAMES COULD I EVEN GO BY?”

Papyrus smirked. “I COULD THINK OF A FEW.”

“LIKE WHAT?!” He grinned brightly and leaned across the table. It looked as if he was waiting on pins and needles for his new nickname.

“WELL, HOW ABOUT ‘CREAM PUFF?’”

There were a few moments of still silence before his other self burst out angrily, “YOU ARE NOT CALLING ME ‘CREAM PUFF!’ I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, AM TOO STRONG, TOO MANLY, TOO –”

Papyrus cut him off with a burst of laughter. The other him appeared affronted, but Papyrus couldn’t stop himself – it was truly hilarious how his clone was acting. His chest ached with glee as he lost himself to the hilarity of it all. It wasn’t long before the other him was joining in and the kitchen was filled with a loud chorus of “nyeh heh hehs.”

As their laughter died away, Papyrus realized just how much the exertion had hurt his cheekbones. It has been far too long since he had laughed so hard. And despite the pain in his face, the exertion had felt… good.

idontevenknowugh

“Listen to your sub first and foremost.” Black offered as advice. “Unless they suggest something truly idiotic,” he added wryly, making Slim chuckle.

Mercy_Run

“buddy, you came to the wrong universe with stats like those.”  The voice was his own, but not identical.  There was a low, gravelly quality to it, “you’ll be dusted within the first hour.”

He frowned at the implication.  Though, Sans really couldn’t fault the other monster for jumping to that conclusion.  At face value; his stats would mark him an easy kill for someone with the right intent.

“i don’t need to kill anyone to be good at fighting.”  He answered and the other skeleton’s expression shifted into something incredulous.

KnowMeKnot

“hey grillbz, what’s the weather like when you show up? hot and sunny,” Sans had made a gesture to fan himself, accompanied with a wink.

“i see steam every time i look at you.”

"i like my monsters like i like my peppers, orange and sizzling.”

SesuRescue

It was around the time for their lesson and Papyrus was feeling antsy. He tried asking for advice from his best friend Undyne, but ‘OPEN THE DOOR NAKED AND SUPLEX HIM ONTO THE BED’ didn't quite seem like the best advice to him.

In_The_aroace_brigade

Sans grinned back. “Yeah, I just don’t see how you are going to beat last year’s gift of supplies to help me clean up and organize my room. Especially the feather duster, that one really tickled me pink.”

“SAAANNNNSSSS, I SWEAR I WILL THROW YOU IN THE SNOWBANK.”

Sans kept his grin even as he replied “Well, I guess I’d make quite a deposit.”

PurrfecktlySinful

As he lay in bed, shirtless and surrounded by his sweaty blankets, Fell was suddenly alerted by the sound of his brother shouting and someone striding purposefully up the stairs. Those were not his brother’s footsteps. Where they being attacked?

Fell sat up and attempted to ready a bone attack. The constructs wavered into existence, coughed, sputtered, and then decided they had better places to be, disappearing with a disappointing fizz.

Fuck.

0neType 

And that’s dangerous, because it feeds something black and wholly unfamiliar somewhere in the pit of his soul. Something inky and dense that sucks away every good feeling like a black hole would do light. And Sans has been dealing with new issues on the daily because of this… thing he’s allowed to take root between them but he’s never hated so deeply. He’s never hated himself with this relentless, clawing dread that screams up from inside him till he’s begging it to just shut the hell up—

#undertale #undertail #positivity #writers #undertale writers #This was so much fun to do #I can't wait to see what people add to this #I'm going to read ALL of them

[zzpopzz]

Really long rant about how I made Vanilla Twilight, I typed it at 2am so it’s kinda crappy and boring, just skip through this post.

So I'd been thinking about it for a long time now, even before finishing Vanilla Twilight that I'd talk about it if someone asked, well that never happened so I was just thinking that I'd let it go but that post is so important to me so well fuck it I'll just talk about it anyway. I did it completely on a wimp like how cool would it be if I make a lyricstuck for Toumaki like I'd be the first (if anyone did this before me im sorry). The first song I intended to do wasn't VT, it was a much shorter and easier song. I saw the music video first time after a while and the lyrics gave me some scenes to draw right away, like the tones, the atmosphere, the lyrics all fit them very well, made me wanted to draw something happy but sad. The ending for it was a happy one instead of a sad one like other songs I did (I didn't post the ending for any of them, just let the viewers decide what it's gonna be) I was very scared like what if it won't turn out ok and people gonna hate me for it or no one even gonna look at it. Also what I visualized are mostly illustrations with backgrounds, what I never done before so high chance it won't go anywhere. I thought well let's just see how far will I get and won't talk about it at all until I post it so at least I won't be all barks no bite. I was very traumatized that someone might know about what I did so I locked all the files when I shut down my PC in case someone hack into it lmao. I started with making a storyboard(kinda) for it, this is where I first got trouble because there was some part I didn't think of when I visualized what I'd draw at first ( 'I don't feel so alone' part mostly and some in between) and it's only at this point that I realized how many I'd have to draw (over 40 images total) and it's mind blowing for someone who rarely finish a painting like me at that time, that number is more than what I'd draw in a year. VT doesn't have choruses that meant I can't do tricks like repeat some panels (I don't like this anyway). I usually painted on small canvas before that but I wanna make sure I can fix things later and some idea I had was pretty big so I used 3000x5000px canvas then trimmed them down ( I didn't know how big it was and it's huge). The idea was to make a tumblr scroll-post like a lyricstuck (my favorites are by paperseverywhere and toastyhat/emptyfeet , they made really cool tutorials about these) so I tried to drew out compositions that would look good scrolling down panel by panel and have some connections between them (this didn't turn out so good in the end because I wasn't good lol) Since I was scared that people might point out that I draw something wrong, it took me almost a week or something searching for references (check my pinterest board) like the streets, sky, houses, roads, outfits, poses,... I was going to draw. I got some knowledge about bikes by this too, like I can tell the differences between road bike, mtb, touring bikes,... I also see and captured bunches of screenshots and reread ywpd trivia countless time to make sure I won't get anything wrong. If you take notice, every outfit Toumaki wear in there are all canon, from anime or promos. The first few panels was really exciting because I had never painted so many with backgrounds before, I was really happy when I almost finished the first verse even compared to the full 3:50 of the song it was only 20 seconds and I thought maybe I can pull this after all. The last panel was intended to be Makichan standing infront of his house looking at the sky but I wanted to show the sky at the end of the panel and that wouldn't work on scroll-down post so I had to leave it for later, I repainted this panel for about 3 times and finished it just 30' before posting. The first panel of the second verse wasn't turning out alright too because that was my first time doing a 3 points perspective drawing and the colors didn't turn out as I wanted either (my intention was a green/gold dawn scene). Things kinda worked well despite that until the scene when Toudou sits in his ink, gdi I didn't know why I was so caught up in that and painted every piece of that wooden floor, it took me almost a week but turned out better than I expected so I was ok with it. I was going to make sketchy paintings for all of the panel but I did too much details on that one so it gave me the impression that I'll have to do just as much for every others. Now I still had school to go and that semester my uni got me pretty crappy schedule that made me have to wait for classes at school frequently, I was frustrated because I didn't get to paint during that time and I might finish it too late (even though I didn't set a deadline) and when I got home I just spent so much time checking twitter and just can't pick myself up to draw and ended up feeling shitty about it. *Side story*  I was so mad because I didn't get anything done and there's still more than half of the whole thing to do and the worst part is that I had no one that I can talk to because I didn't have any friend who ship Toumaki and I also don't want to publicly talk about what I was doing, I wanted to surprise people when I'm done, I didn't wanna give people the expectation then screw it up (I literally thought I'd drop a bomb not a grenade lmao) I can't remember how long was that shitty phase but I felt like it was so long, I barely finished verse 2 at that point. I was so mad at myself and my progress so I spent a few days to look at time management threads and this helped a lot, I changed my habits completely  by this and I still apply those methods now, like I used to stay up til 3am to read fics (bless you writers you fueled me with your writings bless you all) then I switch to bed before 12 and get up early for a good start or reduce working time while increasing quality* After that I kinda got things together,I just went ahead with painting tho it's still kinda tiring, I had to work on 5 essays during this time too. At this point I was like screw all, I give no shit about what everyone thinks I'm just gonna finish this and get some good nap (I practiced power nap to get more focus time for painting but dude everyone wants a good long nap) 10 days before uploading I found out that there's a Toumaki day (I'm so sorry), I was going to posted on the first sunday of June (I did researched on which was the best time to post on social medias so I randomly picked a sunday) and Toumaki day is the last sunday of May, that meant I had 10 days left and 15 panels to paint! I was going to ignore that but I already made it big I should make it right too so I shit my pants going through those last panels. I purposely hiding Toudou's face till the last verse to emphasize the feelz and got so relieved that I finally got to paint him (I read some tags that some viewers got emotional at this part so I'm so glad it worked). The whole things was put under Makichan's perspective so I was so sick of painting him at that point, he showed up in every panel and I can't paint him ugly because he's beautiful (especially his hair, I spent shitload of time painting them). I can talk lots about why I picked to do so but that's headcanon shit and it's embarrassing so let's just skip that. The last day I had only 3 panels left and I was hell confident that I've got this and somehow spent the whole evening rewatch Toumaki pingpong ep (end me). Of course that didn't end well, I managed to finish those by midnight but I still had like 3 panels that needed  repaint completely and all 43 needed retouch and edits. My plan was to post at 9am sunday (thats 9pm saturday est) so I had to get up at 5am and finish all that, I ended up cutting down 2 panels and simplified the instrumental panel (some tags said that was nice so I was at least relieved). Unlike other songs I did, the length of every line's quite different and the original sizes I did would make viewers have to scroll slower or faster at different parts. I didn't plan this beforehand and had to trim down some panels even the parts that I really liked and spent lots of time on. I also found out that people outside the homestuck fandom might not familiar with this type of post so I made a video too (I’m sorry I have zero skill in editing). After posting I was terrified of people's reactions or worse, there won't be any reaction so I turned everything off and went to sleep and woke up with an unimaginable number of notes I'd got, I set the target of 500 notes and I really didn't think that I'd get past that number like maybe 2-300 (well my other songs didnt even get 200), at the end I got 5000. I spent the next week reading and screencap tags given in reblogs, I put them on desktop and they're still my motivation til now. Vanilla Twilight is the thing I'm proud of the most even until now, when I've done other songs and projects that look somewhat better. If I have to recommend one thing on my blog I'd recommend it despite its' unskilled paneling, poor composition and muddy colors. It was the first time in my life that I'd put so much effort into something and went through such emotional roller coaster, the feelings I put into it was raw and the idea was very original compared to other songs, I improved and changed a lot during the 2 months I spent on it and never once regret doing it. ***Anyway, you sure have much free time to read it this far, here's a little game for you: I put random things in VT and HF like some characters/stuff from other series, my ocs,... (there wasn't anything purposeless in there even the logo on their cups or the bags they wear) just send me anything you find and I'll draw you something in return**

#toumaki #tweetdump #rant #poopask

[mr-hawkmoth]

Hi! Just have a quick question. The MLblackout has gotten me thinking about my complete lack of talent when it comes to technology. I've seen tons of posts explaining the difference between re logging and reposting, which I totally understand. Reposting sucks. But with my lack of technological skill, I want to make sure I'm reblogging correctly. To reblog you clock the square arrows, right? If I'm wrong and have reposted any art I feel awful! Thanks! P.S. love your posts❤️

Thats okay dear- when I first got on tumblr I didnt understand either but have since learned the difference- reblogging is clicking the little green arrows! Reposting on the other hand is a lot more work! To repost something you would have to save or screen shot the picture and make an entirely new post. Reblogging is simple- click the little green arrow box to reblog. I hope that helped :) thanks for asking!!! And I’m glad you enjoy my blog!

[elvesofnoldor]

platanochips replied to your post “me rn”

Yolanda it's corny to take a joke made for black people, bc "taking Ls" is black talk and so ofc only black people are going to know the significance in lala land having three Ls, demanding to know what it means and then saying it's not that funny just bc you didnt get it right away, it's hilarious but it's only going to be funny to black ppl

ok I completely understand now--I didn’t know that it was a culturally specific slang term when I did google the phrase "Taking the Ls” (I have to admit that I probably should have actually look up the details of the definition so I know what you told me here before making that post. My apologies. At first glance of urban dictionary definition, the phrase just seems like another non culturally specific English slang term that I didn’t know). Honestly I had a feeling it’s not for me when I didn’t get it this morning, and i did let it go instead of demanding an explanation, but then later on the day other people are reblogging the post with tags like “it’s so obvious!!” on my dash again, which really leads me thinking that the post is supposed to be funny to everyone living in Americas and isn’t culturally specific at all. That’s why I then reblogged a post about not getting the joke.

Sorry about the lack of taste and sensitivity in reblogging the aforementioned post. 

Now, I can’t demand people to come to me and tell me what is it that i did is offensive, but since we are mutuals and kinda friends, I would just really appreciate that you come to me and tell me what I did wrong instead of vague blogging about me as if I can’t see it! You don’t even have to explain it to me like you did here, just tell me to do my research and I’d checked myself. I can totally see how I annoyed you now, and I can understand if you just don’t want a confrontation over little things, but this is obviously not “little things”. So. Yeah. 

#platanochips #not spn

[fxrcfly]

Btw guys, I need your help with something... If there is anyone, who knows how to emotionally/mentally close yourself off for a while or how to deal with unpleasant situations at work (!!) which you can’t get out of, please take a look under the read more!

WARNING! There will be mature themes, mention of sa.dism/mas.ochism and mention of hum.iliation.

I know my blog isn’t popular or anything, I don’t get likes on posts unless it’s a plot I’ve reblogged, but I hope someone will open this page and read it. And maybe even help me.

My parents don’t know how to close yourself off, neither does my bff, so I’m coming to you, my followers.

First of all, I work at a copy center as a computer operator. What do I do? Mostly I do regular printing on all the standard paper sizes, I print of regular paper, photo paper, postcard paper, magnetic paper etc, I print plane tickets, thesis, blueprints, posters, photobooks, canvas, pictures etc, basically anything you can imagine. Almost. And I do scanning (that’s when, for example, you need to get a document from paper to PDF and send to an email or something (for those who know what scanning is - you’d be surprised how many people don’t know the difference between scanning something and making a plain copy of something)).

Now that you know what I do at work, I can tell you about this one client who makes me feel very uncomfortable and uneasy. There is this one old guy, for whom I have scanned pictures three times already. He has grey hair, a bit pervy mustache and he always seems happy to be here. Well, his looks doesn’t matter, I have no problem with that, but the things he asks me to scan for him....... The first time I met him I got lucky I guess. It wasn’t anything disturbing, but the second time... He needs us to scan him magazine clippings with naked women and naked men clearly taken from some kind of erotic newspapers and magazines, most of them are drawings, cartoons or something. But this time there were A5 sized fully naked women with texts where men were humiliated, degraded, called low-lifed animals. And that’s not it. He needs us to edit those cut-outs in photoshop (resize and crop them) and then he wants us to put multiple pictures on one page and then print it out multiple times. In total it takes 30-40 minutes to do everything he needs for him to leave.

We have a rule a rule at work, that we can’t look/read the things out clients bring us to copy and scan, but FUCK! You need to be blind not to even have a small glance at what you need to scan to do it properly and not just like ‘let’s just not look and throw it on the scanner like some toilet paper’. And those texts glued on those pictures... I try my best to not read them and not to look at those pictures in general, but I can’t help if there are a couple of words that stands out. And there was this uneasy, kinda panicky feeling, like I wanted to just turn around and walk away to the back room to be far away from it. Please don’t get me wrong, I’m not judging him by what he likes, it’s just he’s a complete stranger standing in front of me, I don’t know anything about him, not a name or anything, just the fact that he gets off to these things! I DON’T WANT TO KNOW THAT!! I DON’T WANT TO FUCKING KNOW! And he looks at me like this is no big deal. Well, congrats that you are so comfortable with it, but I DON’T LIKE THIS SHIT, IT MAKES ME FEEL LIKE I’M ABOUT TO HAVE AN ANXIETY ATTACK FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE. Well, of course there is this other side of it - we all are grown people, we all have seen porn at some point, but coming with it to a public place and make someone look at it at their workplace when they are least expecting it and make them feel shitty is just... Idk, I’m at loss of words.

That day after I finished my shift I walked out of the building and somehow managed to lock it away, forget about it. But then came the worst part - the next morning. As I entered the building I was scared to see that man again waiting in the line for scanning again. I didn’t feel safe at my workplace.

I wrote an email to the personnel guy, he didnt know what to do either, he promised to email this to our boss and ask her what would be the best thing to do in this situation, because I can’t give this guy to another colleague and make them deal with this, I can’t refuse to scan his pictures, because it turns out we have done it in the past (but no one had said anything) (and in our company the client always comes in the 1st place)...

(And not to mention the fact that sometimes there are kids running around while their parents are waiting in the line for printing or copying and they can see these pictures anytime)

To be honest I wouldn’t have written anything about this on here, but this guy came in today too, I called the next umber in line and he came smiling towards me. This time I knew what to expect, but nevertheless I felt uncomfortable. And this time I even felt sick to my stomach, I don’t know why. My body just reacted this way. And this time some of those pictures were literal porn.

So... The question is, how to not be affected by seeing something like this? Should I try to think about a meadow full with flowers? That sounds dumb, I know, but I really have no idea how to deal with this. Every time I see him now my insides twist and turn and I just feel sick. Maybe you have some experience with something like this (I hope not tho) and you could share your story? You know, days go by and I forget about this guy, but then I see him again and all of this bugs me again. I’m already sick of it! I honestly don’t know what to do. And I know, one option is to just say fuck it and change the job. In fact I’ve been wanting to do that since September/October, but since I have already quite big vacation plans for the end of this month I couldn’t afford to change jobs, because I wouldn’t get paid vacation at the end of January. And besides it pays quite okay. But to deal with clients like this one... I don’t think it’s gonna cut it.

Btw one of the things we offer are ‘designing’. Basically, if we need to do editing for our clients it costs 0.25 EUR for 1 minute. Last time he paid around 35 EUR (around 42$) total, this time it was 48 EUR (around 57$), because color scanning, color printing, there were around 20 pictures and I had to edit them all. I’m hoping he’d understand that we are too expensive for his needs and he’d get a 2-in-1 scanner and printer of his own. Really, just look! He came here two times and he could already buy himself a printer for that money. 

#ooc