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#they're back they're really actually back
autistichalsin · 1 day
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One aspect of Halsin's epilogue dialogue with a solomanced player that sticks out to me is Halsin saying that he fears coming will turn out to be a mistake, before explaining that he took the player from a life of high adventure to one that can be described as anything but. And then after being reassured, he says that he still expects to stir from the dream, or that part of him fears something MUST go wrong, depending on the option the player chooses.
Meaning... he had thought about this before and had wondered if it as a good idea, and had concluded that it possibly wouldn't. That going would quite possibly- maybe even probably- make the player realize they weren't happy with him anymore, leave him, and return to their life of high adventure. That he'd "stir from the dream" and be alone once more, because surely no one would actually continue to choose him? Surely he's too happy, surely something in his life must go wrong eventually?
He literally fears that going to the party could result in the player leaving him, and he still does it anyway not only because he loved and missed their traveling companions that much, but because he knows if that is what the player chooses, he'll have to respect it, even if it will utterly gut him in the process.
"You could have done anything. Gone with anyone. Yet you chose me."
And in that is an unspoken question- why? Did you really mean it?
And then... the player reassures him. They promise him they're happy. That they never looked back, that they chose him for a reason.
And maybe he's still afraid of stirring from the dream, but he at least knows it's going to last a bit longer.
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secondbeatsongs · 1 day
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when you're into the Big Ship™ in a Big Fandom™, you have the luxury of having an OTP - a real One True Pairing, where you can read about just them for ages, and you will never run out of fics, and everything is perfect and beautiful and nothing hurts
but when you go to a smaller fandom, you'd better pray to whatever god you worship that someone else in this room ships the same thing that you do, and that if they do, they're writing more than late-night crackfic, because you're on thin fucking ice!
and how small is your small fandom? is it less than 100 fics? maybe even...less than 20 fics?
welp, then it's time to make peace with that god and either open up a text document or learn how to ship everything, because it's swim or drown babey! and your ship is sinking fast
anyway all of this is to say that after hanging out in small fandoms and shipping less-common pairings for a while, going back into a Big Huge Fandom™ is wild because suddenly it's like...wait, why didn't I ship these people again? I don't remember. why was I only sticking to one ship in this fandom?? boring of me, honestly. these guys should make out.
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The fact that radfems spread this post around is actually really interesting--infuriating, but interesting. Because what they've really done here is tell on themselves.
This is the shrimp guy story:
From an anonymous green text called "shrimp saved my life" [emphasis mine]:
>be depressed, suicidal xanax- addicted incel >one day I go to my /aq/fag uncle's house for some shit >he has pet shrimp, never seen anything like it before >he offers to get me some 53 KB JPG >throw them in a barely cycled tank with some shitty rock >several shrimp die >realize that I killed them with my apathy >realize I need to take responsibility for once in my life >do research, learn about water parameters and so on >eventually I have a beautiful planted tank with no more deaths >notice a female shrimp carrying eggs >haven't felt this excited about anything in almost a decade >the eggs disappear and I once again think I fucked up >a few days later I see a tiny transparent baby shrimp >l suddenly know how the shepherds felt as they gazed upon the newborn Christ >by this point I live and breathe shrimp >all my spare time is spent on shrimp research and watching shrimp videos >l spend most of the money I had saved from my last job on shrimp products >quit the Xanax to support shrimp spending >start putting effort into college in hope of getting a good job for my shrimp >grades improve, no longer facing the prospect of dropping out >relationship with parents improves since I am finally passionate about something and applying myself >l see genuine happiness in their eyes when I talk excitedly about my shrimp >for my birthday my mom makes me a shrimp cake >it even has fondant legs and little chocolate eggs >cry like a little bitch when I see it >mom hugs me and tells me she's always been proud of me >college dorm neighbours demand to see my shrimp >shit they're gonna think I'm autistic >they actually think my shrimp are really cool >they start inviting me to their social events >start interacting with girls, get told by girls for the first time in my life that I'm fun and smart >l think my shrimp would be proud of me if they knew >We're gonna make it bros. Even if you can't do it for yourself, do it for the animals that depend on you.
He did address his relationship with women. By finding a hobby and passion and working on himself--"touching grass"--he stepped away from the echo chamber that filled him with all this rage and convinced him women were to blame for all of his problems. As someone once wisely observed, "the cure is going offline and realizing it's just. really not that big a deal."
And that is what radfems have not done, so of course they didn't spot the quiet flashpoint of shrimp guy's personal development within his story.
Edit: it's been brought to my attention that the version of the greentext post I lifted the text from was censored by someone else. My bad for not realizing that, tbh it was done so well I thought shrimp guy had done it himself, but that's an important part of the post. I've gone back through and un-censored it. The reply which was spread around with the original post addressed the words themselves well, I think; however distasteful and fucked up the incel rabbit hole is, it doesn't diminish his growth.
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theminecraftbee · 21 hours
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Wels hums as he walks through the shopping district. He doesn't need much, but with the recent release of Overlord, he wants to hear if any of the establishments are playing it. He doesn't expect it somewhere like the Permit Office--Grian's spent too much time and money getting a song that was as perfectly annoying to be put on hold to as possible--and if it is playing in the log shop, he will laugh. But music tends to spread around Hermitcraft fast, and sure, this isn't about anything specific, but who's gonna miss a good opportunity to dunk on Doc?
He hears the backing beats from a nearby shop and hums along with them, walking down the path--
--then turns a corner and leaps back.
"You," Wels hisses.
Hello. Awfully rude of you not to include me, you know, says the specter.
"No, there's absolutely no reason for you to be here. None at all!" Wels says, throwing his hands up. "The last time I saw you was--gosh, I don't even know. Season Seven?"
Yes, yes, and the only time you saw me, you aren't lying to yourself at all, the specter says agreeably. Come on. We both know I was haunting you for what little of Season Eight you bothered to be around for.
"If you were on Eight then you super shouldn't be here," Welsknight says. He shakes his head and looks up at the shop playing his song. Joel's? Huh. Wouldn't have thought he'd have a reason to make fun of Doc. Welsknight removes his shaking hand from his sword hilt again and starts walking.
On account of you leaving everyone there to die, yes, we're both aware, the specter says.
"Oh, screw you, you wouldn't have done any different, get new material," Wels says. "Also, you aren't real? You're like, all of my insecurities or whatever. You don't even have a real body right now, no one's made you one."
The specter shrugs. I mean, if I'm the worst parts of yourself, really, you're the one who needs better material. Abandoning all your friends to die and then abandoning them altogether--it's a wonder they let you stick around!
Wels rolls his eyes and forces his hand to stay out of his inventory. Wouldn't do to give away that still even gets him. He peaks at another shop. They're playing the song too, but it's ever-so-slightly out of sync, which is kind of terrible. As he does, Cleo waves at him. Their eyes sort of stutter right past Helsknight, which definitively tells him exactly how much body the specter even has to possess right now.
"I'm actually having a great time with my friends this season, so like, the whole 'abandonment' song and dance isn't going to work this time. Started the season with them and everything; hard to even go for 'they'll forget me at the first opportunity' or whatever."
The thing is, the more Wels says it, the more its true. None of the insecurities and pain points that the specter is echoing back at him are what he was actually thinking about. He's been like... fine? Sure, he's definitely still got repressed negative traits, but nothing like "Xisuma's evil twin brother playing around with his head" or "the moon crashing and killing everyone" or "too depressed and burnt out to get out of bed" or "sort of considering abandoning everyone because that's like, his thing" these days. None of the things that should bring the specter that had haunted him since Beef's cloning machine back to him without a body. But Wels is careful about clones outside of something like Vault Hunters, where they're explicitly under his control. He, like, doesn't even armor stand much. So that can't be this either; Helsknight clearly doesn't have a body to be messing with Wels yet!
...Helsknight doesn't even have a body or an actual insecurity to be poking at Wels with yet.
He stops. He puts his hands in his pockets, and turns around to face Helsknight. He is no longer shaking at all.
"Dude, why are you even here?" Wels asks.
I told you, it was rude to leave me out, Helsknight says.
"What," Wels says.
The final bars of Overlord play over the speakers. Welsknight hums and nods before it suddenly clicks.
"What," Wels says again.
Honestly, you're not normally this much of a moron. It was rude to leave me out. Rapping is also my thing.
"Dude," Wels says.
I could totally destroy Docm77 any day. I would obliterate the fool you call a "friend" in ways you cannot comprehend. You invoke a sacrificial goat? I know ways he'd never recover, gods he'd never be able to retrieve himself from. It would be laughable. And you left me out.
Wels stares at the demon from his nightmares.
"You're mad at me because you didn't get to be in my diss track," Wels says.
You let me be in the last one, Helsknight says.
"Dude," Wels says. "Dude, that's pathetic."
Helsknight sniffs. I'm your worst qualities. What does that say about you.
"I didn't even write this for this season," Wels says.
That makes it worse, Helsknight says.
"I don't even know where to start? For one--no, I still don't even know where to start," Wels says. "This is like, the lamest reason you could possibly have to come haunt me. Go away, I'm basking in my like, top 3 charting hit on the Hermitcraft server."
Top three? Pathetic. There are only three songs. You'd be the top song if you'd simply included my power, Helsknight says.
"I can't beat the streaming minutes Grian puts on that hold--look, uh, dude. You're, uh, a very scary representation of my fears and worst qualities and all. Appreciate that. Next time I need to do a diss track, I don't know, maybe I'll invite you? First you've got to stop appearing solely to make my life worse, though. Bring me a cookie or something. I don't know, whatever demons do."
I'm not a demon, I'm a Shadow. We're different, Helsknight says. ...I'll think about it.
When Wels turns the next corner, Helsknight has vanished again. Wels stops in the middle of the street, looks around, confirms the specter has vanished, and then bursts out laughing.
"What the Hels," he says, somehow feeling lighter and more bemused than before. That's a new feeling with his doppleganger. Then, he goes to visit Big Wood. While Doc definitely isn't playing the song of his own accord, Wels figures that Beef just might, and given the day he's having, that would feel like a kind of irony Wels isn't sure how to describe. Besides, he wants to see if Doc will notice if Wels sets the song on loop or something. What can he say--the man's reactions to being taunted are spectacular, and Wels loves seeing them. Call it a bad quality of his or something.
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fire0nfire · 22 hours
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king of my heart | pt. 2
pairings: lando norris x fem!reader | pato o'ward x fem!reader
warnings: love triangle? kinda.
author's note: go get some popcorn cause we have some drama here🍿... and it's a long part, so enjoy!!
part 1 | part 2
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yourusername
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liked by charles_leclerc, isahernaez, frosenqvist, and 79,121 others!
yourusername Miami GP over and out ✅🏁 No words could ever explain just how grateful I am for all of you and for the opportunity that I get to cover this amazing sport with such incredible people by my side. Thank you for everything Miami, I hope to see you again soon! 🌴💖
user1 the power she holds 🙌
user2 she's really living my dream 🥹
lissiemackintosh so happy to be able to share this with you!! love u❤️
yourusername we really need to do this more often😘 love u too! user3 y/n and lissie hosting track tv together is my new roman empire fr user4 SLAY QUEENS!! user5 the queens are thriving user6 i wanna be friends with them so bad 😫
user7 omg girl you're STUNNING
user8 BEST F1 WAG
user9 facts facts facts user10 she's not even a wag lol it's so obvious lando just keeps this nobody around for when he's bored and horny user11 user10 this "nobody" has done SO much in terms of women representation in motorsport, she's hardworking and a lovely woman. meanwhile, you're just a sad little person who's jealous of her because she's successful and close to your crush, who doesn't even know who you are. so get a life and stop embarrassing yourself. user12 user11 SAY IT LOUDER 👏 user13 user11 PREACH!!!
user14 i don't know if i wanna be her or be with her😩
user15 this is such a mood tbh
landonorris so proud of you, boo😍
yourusername 🥰🧡 user16 YNLANDO NATION WE WON user17 we love a supporting boyfriend 🤩 user18 i want what they have, your honor user19 is this considered a soft launch or what? user20 y'all are delulu😂 it's so obvious they're just friends user21 user20 girl being delulu is the solulu 🙌
user22 so when are we gonna talk about felix liking the post?
user23 i'm lost sorry, who's felix? user24 user23 he's pato's teammate in indycar and one of his besties user25 if felix liked then WHERE'S PATO user26 user25 doing more important things than being focused on this girl.
lilymhe such a pretty girl 💗
alex_albon should i be jealous? yourusername you should indeed. can u fight? user24 the friendship i didn't know i needed 🥹 user25 MY FAV WAGS INTERACTING YAY
user26 f1 is so lucky to have you!!!
user27 LOOOL why would they be lucky to have her?😂😂😂 she's nothing special user28 user27 and yet she's still rising 💅 user29 user27 then why are you even on her post? lol obsessed much?
user30 my role model ❤️‍🩹
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📞 incoming call
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[y/n; normal] [pato; cursive]
"...Hello? Did you butt-dialed me or something?"
"Uhm, hi. It's not a butt-dial. I-I actually just wanted to talk to you. Hear your voice, y'know. I've been kinda missing you."
"Oh really? And here I was thinking that your cold behavior toward me over the past three weeks meant that you didn't want anything to do with me. Silly me, I guess."
"I-I'm... [sighs]. That's what I wanted to talk to you about, actually. About the way I've been treating you. I'm sorry, y/n. I really am sorry. I know I've been a total jerk-"
"Yeah, you can put it that way."
"...I've been a total jerk and I regret it very much. You didn't deserve it at all. I just- I'm not trying to excuse my awful behavior but I just think I got- Uhm..."
"You got what?"
"Well... I saw Lando's instagram story when you went back to Monaco, as you've probably already figured it out. And I think- Well... I got jealous. And I know it probably sounds stupid now but at the time it felt like a punch in the face."
"Pato..."
"I know I didn't and still have absolutely no business to be jealous about you and Lando, cause you and I are not dating or anything and you don't owe me any kind of explanation about the type of relationship you have with him. But after the great time we spend together in Long Beach... I don't know, it just hurted seeing you with him. But that doesn't excuse anything and I just regret so much the way I've been treating you since then, it hasn't been fair to you at all."
"And it didn't cross your mind that we could have had this conversation way before now? I mean, you waited three weeks to finally talk to me like a decent human being, how-"
"I know and I'm so-"
"Let me finish."
"Sorry, go on."
"However, I do appreciate that you're finally acknowledging all of this and communicating with me like an actual adult. I know it's not always easy to do. And although I don't owe you any kind of explanation, I just want you to know that there's nothing going on between Lando and me."
"So you and him...?"
"We're friends and that's it. We care for each other but there's nothing going on."
"Oh... well, thanks for clarifying that for me."
"Yeah, yeah. You'll have to work harder for my forgiveness, anyway. I appreciate the call but it won't be that easy for you."
"Is that so?"
"You've heard me."
"In that case, what would you say if I invite you for a few days to come here to Punta Mita? Maybe that'll help me a little to earn your forgiveness."
"... I'm sorry, what!?"
"You've heard me."
"You're joking. You have to be joking."
"I'm not joking. You're still in Miami, right?"
"I am..."
"Great! My brother in law is in Miami too and he'll take the jet tomorrow morning. If you want to, you can join him and come here with him! We'd be thrilled to have you here too."
"Oh my God... Pato, I don't know what to say!"
"Say yes and you'd make this birthday boy the happiest man in the world. You'd even make my sister happy, I've been telling her a lot about you and now she's eager to meet you."
"I hope you've been telling her good things about me, then."
"Only the best. She's even on your side, y'know. Said I was being a giant cabrón and needed to make things right. She wasn't wrong tho."
"[giggles] Fine. I'll go, but I'm only doing this for your sister."
"I'll take that anyway! I'll let Brett know you'll join him and I'll send you the details, okay?"
"Okay!"
"Now go and pack your bags for tomorrow."
"Hey! Don't get bosy with me, mister!"
"[Laughs] Fine. Take care, I'll see you tomorrow."
"See you, birthday boy!"
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patriciooward posted to his story!
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[caption 1; 🦈] [caption 2; beautiful views]
yourusername posted to their story!
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[caption 1; para-para-paradise 🌞] [caption 2; in his sharkboy era] [caption 3; 🐶❤️]
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paddockgossips
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liked by magui_corceiro and 84,091 others!
paddockgossips Among the alleged "breakup" between y/n and Lando, the McLaren driver was photographed last night having fun in a Monaco club in the company of Max Fewtrell and other friends. Some sources have said that Lando seemed very cozy with a blonde woman at the party, whom he later left with. However, we cannot verify this information in any way, so it remains a rumor.
user1 I HAVE A CHANCE AGAIN (i'm delulu)
user2 so this confirms ynlando is over?? 😭
user3 girl i'm devastated 😭😭😭 user4 i'm still in denial user5 well they were never together to begin with user6 user5 THIS!! people act like they were a couple when they NEVER confirmed anything 😂
user7 "blonde woman at the party" "it remains a rumor" and magui goes and like the post LOL
user8 she's so desperate for attention🙄 user9 who's magui??? user10 user9 she's kika's friend and she was dating football player João Félix not so long ago (in fact, i thought they were still together lol) user11 user10 and don't forget she's a cheater. user12 user9 she's trouble
user13 yn >>>>>>>> magui
user14 user13 no need to compare them
user15 sorry but single lando it's so hot 🥵
user16 SO TRUE user17 FACTS he looks so good omfg
user18 in his heartbreaker era 😎
user19 in his reputation era 😎 user20 in his idgaf era 😎
user21 i'm a child of divorce fr
user22 i know y'all love y/n for some reason but i'm SO glad lando finally got away from her.
user23 SAME. and if magui makes him happy then great for him user24 stfu i'm mourning here
user25 y/n this magui that but max was, is and will forever be lando's true wag💅
user26 the one and only indeed
elbaoward posted to her story!
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[caption1; off to dinner] [caption2; my love🤍] [caption 3; lovebirds!]
patriciooward
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liked by landonorris, yourusername, brettkimbro, and 86,382 others!
patriciooward BDAY WKND DUMP 📸 thank y'all for all the love❤️‍🔥
user1 THE HARD LAUNCH IT'S HARD LAUNCHING
user2 OMG IT'S HAPPENING EVERYBODY STAY CAAAAALM
user3 he really said i'll give you what you want: thrist traps and y/n... and he's so real for that
user4 he really knows his audience user5 king behavior if u ask me user6 everybody say thank you Pato 🙏
user7 YNPATO NATION HOW ARE WE FEELING??
user8 I'M STILL SPEECHLESS user9 they're so perfect i wanna cry😭 user10 LOVE TO SEE🔥
user11 as a ynlando shipper i have to admit they're cute but ngl this still hurts 😩
user12 MOOD user13 ynlando will always be in our hearts 🥺 user14 ynlando >>>>>>>>>> ynpato user15 user13 girl grow up.
user16 THAT SHOULD BE ME
elbaoward where are my credits for the last pic? cuties🤍
user17 u literally gave us the cutest pic ever user18 elba thank you so much for your service🫡 user19 elba is ynpato's #1 fan and you can't tell me otherwise user20 elba is just like us fr user21 LOVE YOU ELBAAAAA 🩷
user22 MOM AND DAD
user23 can't believe how fast she moved on and got together with this dude lol lando really dodged a bullet with her
user24 how fast she moved on?? girl y/n and lando were never even together so stfu user25 ???? why are you even on pato's ig post? go away user26 user23 y/n is such an attention seeker and yet everyone loves her, i'll never understand it 🥱
user27 not to be that person but i would KILL to be that piñata😏
user28 MOOD
frosenqvist oh to be tanned, young and in love
patriciooward 😜 user29 IN LOVE??? FELIX BESTIE TELL US MORE user30 i don't know about y'all but this is all the confirmation i need about ynpato being real, bye user31 i think i can hear the wedding bells user32 user31 yesss and felix as pato's best man
user33 bestie don't be shy and drop more y/n pics 🫶
user34 i second the motion !!!
user35 NOT LANDO LIKING THE POST LOOOOL
user36 he is so unserious i love him user37 ICONIC BEHAVIOR TBH user38 yeah but i just know he's crying inside user39 user38 for what? lol lando knows he's so much better than this cheaper version of him. user40 user39 i'm so done with people like you who insult pato just because you cannot defend lando with good arguments.
yourusername magical weekend 💖
patriciooward with you there? always user41 STOP THEY'RE SO CUTE OMG user42 this is such an upgrade tbh user43 SO HAPPY FOR THEM 🥹 user44 what a bitch.
yourusername posted to their story!
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[caption 1; back to reality✈️] [caption 2; I'm a high performance athlete. Athletes sweat. Sweat, baby] [caption 3; cutest model🧡]
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paddockgossips
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liked by magui_corceiro and 53,237 other people!
paddockgossips NEW WAG ALERT? 🚨 Magui Corceiro, the Portuguese model and actress, attended the Monaco GP after being seen a few days ago having lunch with Lando. It has been rumored that they could be in a relationship, especially since Lando and y/n apparently went different ways, and Corceiro's presence in the paddock has not gone unnoticed by anyone. Still, neither Lando nor Magui have confirmed or denied these rumors.
user1 A TRIGGER WARNING WOULD BE NICE NEXT TIME
user2 um let's hope there isn't a next time user3 user2 let's pray girl, let's pray 🙏
user4 "neither lando nor magui have confirmed or denied these rumors" well that's bs cause she just liked the post
user5 istg she's trying so hard to get attention user6 lando was asked about magui and he said she was just a friend... and then she goes and does this lol what a clout chaser user7 and people used to say that y/n was after lando's fame and yet she NEVER did anything like this user8 she's such a pick me girl
user9 everything i know of this girl has been against my will istg
user10 SAME
user11 oh good luck lando
user12 oh be prepared for the y/n fans and little girls that'll come attack magui when she hasn't even done anything wrong
user13 literally they're just mad at magui cause she's dating their fav driver loool user14 they're only jealous cause magui is a gorgeous woman user15 user14 she's gorgeous but she's still a snake
user16 i'd ask why lando would be with someone like her, but then i remember he's an adult and if he wants someone like her by his side then that's up to him. let's not treat him like a baby please
user17 say👏 it👏 louder👏
user18 weeeeell if this is the kind of people lando likes to have around then i guess y/n really dodged a bullet with him
user19 FACTS user20 i mean at the end of the day he's just another privileged white boy, so🤷‍♀️ user21 i really don't get all the hate that she's getting, is she really that problematic? user22 user21 girl google it yourself but yeah, she is
user23 I MISS MY GIRL Y/N WHERE IS SHEEEEEEEE??
user24 what is she even doing there?
user25 must be cause lando wanted her to be there user26 why y'all never asked the same thing about y/n? y'all are such hypocrites istg user27 user26 cause y/n was actually doing her job????? user28 user26 oh you're stupid 😂😂
user29 magui in the paddock, pato not being able to finish Indy 500... it really is a shitty day huh
user30 DON'T EVEN REMIND ME WHAT HAPPENED WITH PATO OMFG user31 I'M STILL SO MAD ABOUT PATO user32 the only good part is that y/n and his family were there for him ❤️‍🩹
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see y'all in part 3!
taglist: @drunkinthemiddleoftheday @evie-119 @evans-dejong @minkyungseokie @noneofyourfbusinessworld @bernelflo @eiaaasamantha @ijustgomessitupx @honethatty12 @daemyratwst @f1fan65
(if you'd like to be tagged in the next part, just let me know in the comments!🧡)
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doubleca5t · 2 days
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i also didn't love tppd, but i didn't really mind it, just wondering why you seem to really not have enjoyed it? genuinely curious
- Every instrumental sounds the same and they're all extremely boring and one note
- Her lyricism is severely lacking on most of these songs (I Hate It Here, The Alchemy, and Who's Afraid of Little Old Me are the worst offenders imo but there's a lot of cringe on there)
- The album would be a complete snoozefest from front to back if you don't know any Taylor Swift lore but knowing the lore actually makes the album even worse because you realize how many of the songs are about her being head over heels for that soggy rat man from The 1975.
- 31 songs and 2 hours is just too fucking long who has time for that
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acapelladitty · 1 day
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ok but,,,, Mr "the" ghoul subbing for his so/ for the first time and he's all unsure and tryna be cocky but he's actually a big softie who loves being taken care of and told what to do 💥
light me up and breathe in
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Pairing: Cooper Howard/F!Reader
Fic Masterlist
Link to AO3
Summary - After some convincing, Cooper agrees to let you give him a chest massage.
(tw: heavy petting, teasing, cockwarming, threats of violence, cannibalism mention, dirty talk)
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Convincing Cooper to let you take care of him was a task better suited for the great thinkers of the world, people who had the patience and the fortitude to deal with his stubborn bullshit as he dodged your every attempt. However, time was always on your side and you weren't convinced if it was the appeal of a massage or the promise that you would stop asking if he relented, but he had eventually given in.
His upper clothing had been shed quickly enough, exposing his bare torso to your greedy eyes. A shapely sight, his body wasn't overly muscular, but clearly held a core strength as it formed a solid expanse - the skin scarred and textured across every visible inch.
Reclined on his chair, his eyes were wary but heated as he watched you clamber onto his lap with a childish eagerness.
"That desperate, huh?"
"Shut up."
Rolling your hands along his chest, the rough texture of his skin left a pleasant tingle in your fingers as you follow the natural contours of his body. Patchy and pitted beyond reason, you map out the ridges with a faint smile and your fascination with his skin didn't go unnoticed.
"You staring at me like that makes me wonder if you're thinking 'bout taking a bite?" Cooper's low voice, dulled by his forced nonchalance, filled the air between you and you refuse to look up and meet his eye as you answer.
"Maybe." You tease, trailing a finger along the column of his neck. "It's about time you had something to worry about so maybe I'll cannibalise some part of you to shut you up for a while."
"If you're gonna wrap those pretty lips around a part of me then I've got some ideas, darlin'."
Gaze flitting across his body as you ignore his suggestion, you settle on his nipples and admire the deep red colour which stands free of his chest. You can imagine him in a better time, picture how dense the chest hair which would have coated him would feel below your fingers. How fun it would be to run your digits across the thick mat and pull at it teasingly, forcing him to shift up and meet your lips with a single tug.
But no.
Hairless.
It really was a cruel world.
Still, there was more than one way to get a reaction and you clamp your thumbs and forefingers around his nipples as you pinch the nubs with malicious intent.
"Maybe I'll focus on these. They're very sensitive."
A strangled gasp escapes him but he covers it quickly by curving his thick hands around the swell of your ass.
"True that, sweetie, but if you tear 'em off I'll be taking yours to replace them. With my teeth, mind."
Pulling at the nubs even more roughly, the discomfort forces a warning rumble from his throat as he arches his back against the chair.
"Not how this works, Coop. You have to say please if you want me to stop."
Scowling, he relents regardless, having alresdy agreed to the terms of the game. "Please."
"That's better, handsome."
Hands feeling dry, you get a move on with your agreement and add a healthy dollop of the unscented lotion which you had stumbled on in an abandoned pharmacy. Its discovery had prompted this little game and you can't hold back your grin as you spread it across his skin - sinking into the intimate contact with a soft sigh.
Tense as hell, Cooper is every inch a coiled serpent ready to strike out. He's subtle with it though; matching your wry comments with his own and visibly attempting to force himself to relax into the earnest touch. For a creature who was wrapped around you like a glove when you fucked, this type of intimate engagement appeared to give him more anxiety than staring death down the barrel of a gun.
"Relax." You soothe, hands running across his collarbone to wrap around his shoulders.
"I am relaxed." He lied.
"Liar." You call him out with a teasing smile. "But if a little massage is so scary for the big, bad bounty hunter then let me make you a bit more comfortable."
Dropping your slickened hand to his groin, you cup his hardened cock through the fabric, wasting no time in opening his fly and releasing him; allowing the girthy length to jut free in the cool air.
"Wow, Mr. Howard," you tease, gripping your hand around his length and stroking along it with a firm grip, "this looks painful. What are we going to do about it?"
"Cruel to play with a man's bone and not give him somewhere to bury it." Cooper rumbled, his hips bucking into your hand as you tighten your fingers around the base of a cock, denying him any further stimulation until he settles. "Might drive a man to do something dangerous, sweetie."
"Oh well in that case." Raising yourself off his lap by planting your feet on the floor, you slip further towards his body and line up his blunted cockhead with your hole - arousal making your lips feels swollen and sensitive as you run his cock along your slickened folds. "Would be a shame to waste it then."
Sinking down on his cock, you drop your head to his neck to hide the discomforting gasp as the familiar stretch of him makes your walls burn with the sudden intrusion. The texture of his cock adds an intensity that makes your legs tremble as it rubs along those sweet spots which make stars fly behind your eyes.
You adjust your hips until you're able to sit flush against his groin, the angle a little awkward but fucking delicious as every slight jostle sparks fresh pleasure. His eyes pin you with a greater ferocity than his cock as his head tilts up to keep line with your gaze.
"Tight as a drum." Cooper growls, the feel of you wrapped around him making his hips move of their own accord as he fucks himself deeper; each small rut leaving your cunt wanting more.
But no.
That wasn't the game.
Slapping a hand to his exposed chest, the skin there still moist from the lotion - you cupped your other hand around the back of his neck and scowl at him with a playful anger.
"Hey! Did I tell you to fuck me?"
Stilling his hips, Cooper curled his lips into a smirk.
"That you did not, darlin'."
"Then stop moving and let me have my fun. You focus on keeping that big ol' gun of yours holstered somewhere I know it likes, and I'll focus on what I want to do."
"You drive a hard bargain, missy." He replies, amusement playing across his harsh features. "But a deal's a deal and, hell, I'm sure there's gonna be a reward of some kind for such agreeable behaviours."
"Keep dreaming, handsome. I'm letting you warm your cock in me. Isn't that enough?"
"From you?" Flashing his teeth with an almost feral grin, Cooper's arm snapped around your waist to pull you flush to his chest as his rough lips brushed your ear. "Never."
Squeezing your cunt around him, the action netting you a muted groan, you push him away and roll your hips as your hands return to his chest.
"Nice try, buddy. But no amount of, admittedly, great cock is going to stop me from rubbing every inch of you."
"Stubborn bitch."
Cooper mutters the words without heat, his hands returning to their original position around your ass as you edge yourself on his cock; determined to explore every inch of him before allowing him to get his rocks off.
"Yours."
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mysteryshoptls · 2 days
Text
SSR Ruggie Bucchi - Platinum Jacket Vignette
"Happy 100th Anniversary"
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[Land of Dawning – National Museum of Art]
Ruggie: Can't believe I'm here bein' a supporter for some museum like this. Guess ya never know what life's got in store for ya.
Ruggie: I mean, I totally wouldn't've ever paid to see paintings that I can't even fill my belly with…
Ruggie: But I guess it's okay if I don't gotta pay. I wonder if they got paintings I've seen in my textbooks.
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???: This painting… These are the hyenas from the King of Beast's legends. When the three of them are lined up like this it's kind of intimidating…
Ruggie: Well, yeah, they were out there patrollin' lava quarries 'n goin' out on scoutin' missions, so.
Trey: You sure know your stuff, Ruggie. I guess that would make sense for a hyena beastman to know.
Trey: But still… Both patrolling and scouting seems like painstaking work.
Ruggie: Oh, yeah. From the stories I've heard, they had some pretty tight scrapes…
Ruggie: Like there's one where while they were out chasin' some stubborn foe, they ended up runnin' off a cliff tryin' to catch 'em…
Ruggie: Which had 'em endin' up flyin' into some real prickly thickets.
Trey: If it were me, I'd probably hesitate, worried about getting hurt. Guess the hyenas who worked under the King of Beasts were just that brave.
Ruggie: Brave? Then I guess I'll take that compliment, too. 'Cause I've jumped into thorny thickets like that a buncha times!
Trey: You've jumped into the thorny thickets…? A bunch of times!? Why would you do that…?
Ruggie: Actually, did you know? In the Sunset Savanna, there's this real steep cliff that's become a bit of a tourist attraction.
Ruggie: It's the perfect place to catch the settin' sun, so a ton of tourists go up there to snap a pic, leanin' over the fences 'n everything.
Ruggie: And like, sometimes there's folk that'll get so focused on settin' up the shot, or that'll bump into others that they'll drop and lose stuff.
Trey: I'd expect they'd have to let their stuff go if they dropped it off the cliff… But how does this all tie into you talking about the thorny thickets??
Ruggie: Sheeheehee. So actually, at the bottom of that cliff, there's a huge bramble of thorny thickets.
Ruggie: It's off-limits, and it's pretty dangerous, so no one really heads down there.
Ruggie: So, that's why I'd sneak down in the dead of night, and pick up all the lost items!
Ruggie: Sometimes I'd find little wrapped pieces of candy, watches 'n accessories, and even wallets!
Ruggie: Well, it kinda depended week to week what dropped, but… That was a great way to make some quick cash.
Trey: B-But if you had gotten injured, would all that have been worth it?
Ruggie: Yeah, true. Back when I was just a kid, I could slip in 'n out pretty easily, but I had to stop when I started getting' bigger.
Ruggie: Not only was I makin' big bucks, but the cliff's environment was getting' kept clean. Felt like a win-win deal to me.
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[Land of Dawning – National Museum of Art]
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Ruggie: Oh, this one… It's a painting of the thunder god and his son.
Trey: Yeah, according to the legends, he came to the human world just after being born, and was raised by adoptive parents.
Ruggie: Basically, that means he was raised apart from his actual dad, right? Amazin' they actually look like they get along good.
Trey: Haha… I wonder. Do you get along with your dad, Ruggie?
Ruggie: Nah, I don't got one.
Ruggie: He left back when I was a kid, so I don't remember anythin' about him, 'n I don't know what he's up to now.
Trey: Oh… Is that so? Sorry, I didn't mean to overstep my bounds.
Ruggie: Huh, that reaction's pretty different than what I'm used to.
Ruggie: Back home, there's a ton of kids just like me, so usually they'd just shrug and go, "Oh, okay" and move on.
Trey: And I guess it doesn't sound like they're saying that just to be considerate.
Ruggie: Obviously. Because the bigger problem is not havin' the money to buy food!
Ruggie: Granny'd take care of me, but there wasn't much we could do 'bout our empty bellies…
Ruggie: When I was big enough, I'd start working together with all the kids in my little neighborhood to scrounge up some food.
Trey: Kids running around trying to gather food on their own… That's hard for me to imagine.
Ruggie: There's a buncha ways to gather up food. We'd go into town and ask for alms, or drop a line in the river.
Ruggie: We were always pretty hungry, so we'd pretty much do anything… Oh, like we had a great time once digging for potatoes.
Trey: Is digging up potatoes that exciting?
Ruggie: WELL, YEAH!
Ruggie: There's actually a type of potato that grows in my country that can get as large as 20 kilos…
Ruggie: Around the time the potato harvestin' was finishin' up, we all snuck into the fields at night…
Ruggie: And we'd pick up some stunted potatoes that were left behind, as well as dug up some other forgotten potatoes.
Ruggie: We were all up in arms to pick every single one before the sun rose!
Trey: Why'd you go at mid… Never mind, I'm not going to ask.
Ruggie: And then, this one year when I was diggin', I hit the jackpot!
Ruggie: It was a potato so huge I wouldn't've even been able to carry it with both arms! It had't've been heavier than 20 kilos~
Ruggie: Didn't think there'd be any potatoes left that huge… Maan, I really lucked out then.
Trey: 20 kilograms, huh… With something that big, I don't think there'd be much to worry about eating for a while.
Ruggie: Don'tcha think?
Ruggie: I was thinkin', like, we could dry whatever was leftover and turn it to powder to make it last a bit longer…
Ruggie: But then Granny ended up boilin' 'em, fryin' 'em, and basically makin' a ton of dishes. It was a potato party extravaganza!
Ruggie: Me and the other street kiddos were just packin' 'em away, and little by little it started to disappear…
Ruggie: In the end, I couldn't make anything to save it for later.
Trey: Ah… That's rough.
Ruggie: And I never saw a potato that huge ever again. Guess good luck like that only ever hits once in a while.
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[Land of Dawning – National Museum of Art]
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Trey: Woah… This painting has a real powerful presence.
Ruggie: So, this is a painting of when the Thorn Fairy transformed into a dragon to fight, huh.
Trey: She looks way stronger than what her stories say. I bet I would be no match for her.
Ruggie: Eh!? Trey-san, you lookin' to pick a fight with the Thorn Fairy? It'd be waaay better to try 'n flatter her instead
Trey: Oho, but that might be the scarier route, don't you think? You might end up in deep trouble if you were to offend the Thorn Fairy instead.
Ruggie: Sheeheehee. Oh, but I'm pretty good with that kinda stuff.
Trey: Haha, well, I guess I have to admire that pluck.
Ruggie: But man, she's really something. She's the one that caused all that lightning too, right?
Ruggie: They say it was always thunderin' and lightnin' outside her castle as a way to keep intruders out… That's a huge undertakin', huh.
Ruggie: But with all those lightning strikes, I bet the bread prices were super cheap near the Thorn Fairy's castle.
Trey: Bread? …Ohh, right! Because when lightning strikes, certain particles are released in the air that helps plants grow.
Ruggie: Huh? Wait, are ya sayin' there's actually a whole science behind the whole "bread gets cheaper whenever it thunders"!?
Trey: Oh, isn't that what you meant?
Ruggie: I was just sayin' what Granny would always say…
Ruggie: Wait, so does that sayin' mean that 'cause more wheat gets harvested, more bread can get made, and that's why it's cheaper?
Trey: Yeah. Although, with how much we've developed our fertilizers nowadays, I don't know how much lightning strikes actually play a part anymore.
Ruggie: Cooool, I had no idea. Guess you Science Club folk know your stuff.
Ruggie: I bet Granny didn't really know the meanin' behind it like you did…
Ruggie: But I bet she saw with her own eyes the change in bread prices whenever there were tons of thunder and lightning.
Ruggie: But still… Kinda weird, huh. Sheeheehee.
Trey: Weird? What is?
Ruggie: Back when I was a kid, I only ever cared 'bout food, so there's no way I woulda been interested in learnin' why the bread was cheaper.
Ruggie: But now, I heard your whole spiel, and my reaction was to think it was pretty cool. Guess I'm maturin'.
Trey: Well… Maybe it's just that you can actually afford to take the time to listen now?
Ruggie: Maybe, maybe not. 'Cause my wallet's still pretty empty…
Ruggie: Oh hey, maybe this is just me bein' able to relax my stresses away, huh!? …Maybe not, heh.
Trey: Could be, if you're enjoying your time here, at least. Oops… Look at the time.
Trey: I think I'll head out to go check on how my dormmates are doing. See you, Ruggie.
Ruggie: 'Kaay, see ya. I'm gonna keep lookin' around this area a bit longer.
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Ruggie: Hm? This painting… A lion cub's just lollygaggin' with a warthog 'n a meerkat.
Ruggie: I'm wonderin' if they even know all the scary things that can happen to animals that step outta their territory, hm?
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Requested by Anonymous.
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fuck-customers · 3 days
Note
today, mar 25 2024, a woman came into my red hardware store and dumped her bag of returns on my counter. she said "i have a fucking return. it's all coming the fuck back. i don't need any of this fucking stuff" and i was instantly on edge because she's being loud and every other word was another f-bomb. and i GET IT i get swearing, i get being angry, but why the hell are you upset with me lol i looked at the pile of stuff and was like "oh did you buy this yesterday?" because i recognized the pile of items as things that i had personally rung up at some point. it's a bunch of electrical stuff like outlet covers and some solenoids or wtv. but god i shouldn't've said anything. because she snaps "No what the fuck. i bought this fucking weeks ago. and i dont fucking need it. so i'm returning it"
and i'm like.. damn ok, fine. she's digging for receipts. and has a huge stack of Orange Hardware store receipts. and i'm watching her flip through them and she snaps "go ahead and grab yours if you recognize it!" and i'm like 'uh.. ok i'm pretty sure that my store's receipt is this one' and i pointed at one (idk if its just the font but i recognized my store's receipt and yoinked it out.
so i start processing her return. she's like "ugh i need to go get my card from the car!" and i'm like ok, that's fine. she doesn't really need it for the return but 1) i want her to get away from me because i'm gonna call a manager she's being such an asshole. 2) her friend was looking for other stuff to buy.
she comes back in with her card. i'm like scanning and returning the items. 3 items i KNOW are NOT ours are on the pile. im like.. i don't want to deal with her trying to insist that they belong to our store. but i scan one. it beeps 'item not found' i go 'oh well these items aren't from our store, sorry i can't return them"
and she's like "i dont see how that's fucking possible! everything in that bag is from this fucking store!" and she's just absolutely shrieking. and i don't understand why she's mad, like i don't get it. the manager came up and was like 'we don't sell this product. sorry we can't do a return on it.'
she screams some more but accepts that they must be Orange Hardware and not Red Hardware. She goes out to "make a call while her friend shops"
and i swear to god that she was screaming at someone on the phone for next fourteen minutes and everyone inside the store could hear her from the parking lot. every other word out of this woman's mouth was "fuck" and it was setting my nerves on edge.
her friend finally came up to buy his shit. and it totals $77. she's standing at the door handing him her visa and she is PISSED that the total is $77. she says she doesn't understand how it could add up to that much. and im like uhmmmm.. they're plumping parts.. and the stupid toys you're buying for your grandkids pushed the total to $77 after tax.. either buy it or leave. i don't care
she ended up buying it but you could still hear her swearing up and down the parking lot as she was screaming on the phone with her mother (apparently) saying that she was going to need to be reimbursed for the shit she was buying
and i'm just like... goddamn, i dont care how awful your day is. don't take it out on employees or customers you asshat.
the only funny part about this is the fact that her name was actually Karen. which just made me laugh. but all the other staff had come up to the front to make sure i was okay while she was yelling. and she did get intimidated by some of the men and slink out while her friend paid for the stuff. but still.. a big yikes.
Posted by admin Rodney.
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sophsbookstore · 4 hours
Text
Chicken Shop Date
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Lando Norris x reader 。・:*˚:✧。
Masterlist can be found in navigation!
Word Count: 2,348
Y/N walks into the chicken shop where they're filming the newest episode of her and her best friends youtube show Chicken Shop Date. Y/N and her best friend Amelia have been running the channel for a few years now, both girls switching off taking turns dating different celebrities.
Today Lando Norris was to be on the channel, and Y/N was ecstatic. Y/N has always been a big fan of formula one, with McLaren being one of, if not her favorite team. The original plan was for Amelia to be doing the date, the girls always switching off interviewing every other date, but Amelia knowing how much Y/N liked Lando, trades spots with the girl trying to set her friend up.
“Ok Y/N, Lando should be coming round the corner in a few.” One of the PA’s says, kneeling next to Y/N who was already sitting at the table, wiping her nervously sweaty hands against her legs.
“Y/N are you excited?” Amelia asks her best friend, Y/N side eyeing her friend before turning her attention back to the empty chair ahead of her.
“You suck, you know how much I like him, it was your turn to go on a date anyway!” Y/N whisper shouts. Amelia laughs, giving her bestie a quick hug before going to her spot behind the camera. The rest of the crew gets ready as Lando and his team enter the set.
Y/N watches anxiously as Lando shakes the crew member's hads, introducing himself to everyone before coming over and sitting across from her. “Hi, im Lando” the curly haired man says, holding his hand out across the table for Y/N to shake.
She does so, blush creeping onto her face. “Im Y/N, but i'm sure you already knew that” the girl stutters out. “That over there is my co-host Amelia, which I'm sure you already knew as well..” Y/N says kicking herself under the table in embarrassment. Lando looks at the girl, the smile never leaving his face.
“Ok you guys, we are starting in 3..2..” the director holds up one on his fingers, putting it down as everyone gets quet waiting for Y/N to start talking.
“Do you like chicken nuggets and chips?” what a way to start off the “date”, Y/N thinks to herself.
“I love chicken.” Lando says to the girl, smiling slightly as his head nods with satisfaction.
“That's good, I do as well.” Y/N reminds herself that this isn't a real date, she has to keep up the unbothered, bored character throughout the whole video. This is going to be harder than she thought. “Did you know that chicken makes you more beautiful” Y/N can feel her ears getting hotter.
“Does it really?” Lando asks, feeding into Y/N bit. Y/N agrees with the man, nodding her head.
Just then one of the PA’s comes out and hands Y/N a Capri-Sun, she places one in front of herself and Lando. Lando stares at the bagged drink in confusion, turning his head to the girl in front of him, back at the drink, then to her again. “How did you know I like Capri-Sun?”
“because…I’ve..Been, researching you..” the girl stutters out. Way to not sound like a creepy stalker, Y/N thinks to herself.
“I didn't even know I was doing this until yesterday.” Lando says, trying to steer the conversation away, stabbing his straw into the hole at the top of the bag. “I just looked at my calendar yesterday”
“Really? I've known about this for a while now, I've been manifesting it actually.” Y/N taking a bite of a fry, putting on a confident act for the camera.
“So manifesting actually works?” Lando asks, fixing the hod of his sweatshirt.
“It's been in my diary for about 5 years, you just didn't know about it until now.” Y/N shrugs, Lando leaning forward with laughter.
Y/N quickly looks over at Amelia, the girl silently laughing at her friend's awkwardness. Looking back at the monitor Amelia notices her friend secretly eyeing her down, turning to face Y/N she gives her a thumbs up, silently telling her that shes doing a good job and has nothing to worry about.
“Are you into, like, racing and motorsport?” Lando asks, trying to capture the girl's attention.
“Oh yes!” this perks Y/N up, being asked about something that she thoroughly enjoys. “I love Formula 1, my dad is a really big McLaren fan, so growing up we all had to be too.” Y/N finishes with a laugh.
“Are you still a McLaren fan?” Lando leans forward in his chair.
Wanting to play hard to get, Y/N leans slightly back in her chair. “I would say so, yes.”
“Who's your favorite McLaren driver.” he asks with a smirk.
“Oscar Piastri.” Y/N says, her face void of any emotion. Lando sighs, frowning slightly as he takes a bite of his food in defeat.
The pair could go on and on about racing, having both grown up watching the sport, as well as having the same favorite team, the two continue talking. “You know, I've never been to a race before.” 
This perks Landos interest. “I should take you sometime. Let me know which race you want to go to and I'll call a few people.” 
Y/N almost chokes on her drink. Did Lando Norris just invite her to her first ever race? Lando Norris. Her celebrity crush, and the person she has been manifesting to have on this show since it gained its popularity.
“I would really like that actually.” Y/N blushes, not being able to think of a cheeky comeback for his offer.
“You know what, bring your family too, you said they were McLaren fans aren't they?” Lando smiles at the girl, Y/N only being able to nod in agreement and thankfulness.
Lando takes a moment to eat some more of his food, Y/N looks over at Amelia, her best friend silently screaming and clapping for the girl. Y/N is stunned, her eyes wide, her mouth making an “o” like shape. Y/N shakes off the excitement, knowing that she still has to finish the “date” before she can get too excited.
“I hear it gets quite hot in there.” Y/N says catching Landos attention.
“Oh yeah, it gets very hot. Yeah, sweaty-”
“It would be even hotter if I was in there.” Y/N says bluntly. Lando opens his mouth to say a comeback, but when his eyes meet Y/N’s he shuts up, instead the blood rushes to his ears and he bites his lip. “Agreed?” Y/N instigates.
All Lando could do was nod and smile, his face getting redder and redder. Y/N takes her moment, taking a sip of her soda for confidence the girl leans forward, giving Lando her full eye contact as the interview carries on.
“Are you a romantic person?” the girl inquires. 
Lando takes a bite of his fry, looking at Y/N as a smile creeps onto his face, he looks down at his meal. “When I need to be.” he looks back up at the girl, still smiling.
“Good to know.” Y/N keeps eye contact with Lando, taking a bite of her fry, the boy winking at her subtly, making her nearly melt off her chair.
The two continue to eat in silence, one of the PA’s signaling to Y/N that they're about halfway through with the interview. This saddens Y/N, she doesnt want it to end. What if this is the first and last time she’ll ever get to see Lando. No, he offered to take her and her family to a race. What if it was just a joke? No, that would be too mean to be a joke.
“What's your ultimate goal?” Lando pulls the girl from her thoughts. “Apart from like this” Lando says motioning to the cameras and food in front of them.
“To fall in love I guess.” Y/N shrugs.
“That's cute.” Lando smiles at the girl. If she wasn't sitting down she would have passed out in the moment. 
Y/N analizes is face, taking in how cute he is before mustering up the confidence to continue the interview. “What's your type?” the girl asks.
“I'm open.” he shrugged nonchalantly.
“What do you specifically look for in a girl then?” Y/N questions the boy in front of her, desperately wanting to know.
“Just someone who's funny, has Y/E/C, beautiful, has Y/H/C, you know?” Lando continues to wait, trying his absolute best to act nonchalant. “How about you?”
“Oh you know, racer, has brown curly hair, brown eyes, a brown hoodie on right now. Nothing much to it really.” Y/N states, matching the energy as Lando looks down at his brown sweatshirt, looking back at the girl and smiling.
“Good to know.”
“Are you a big spoon or a little spoon?” Y/N doesn't waste any time before jumping into the next question.
“I'm big.” Lando responds. 
“That's perfect, I've been looking for a big spoon.” Y/N casually says.
“I've never been a little spoon before.” Lando laughs at the shock on Y/N’s face, the beautiful girl in front of him making him clarify that he's never been a little spoon before. “We could try,” Lando quickly says to Y/N, both taking a moment to imagine such a thing before turning their attention back to one another.
“Do you snore?” Y/N questions the driver in front of her.
“Yes.” he replies bluntly, leaning his body slightly more forward.
“No, really? That's a deal breaker for me.” Y/N puts on a fake sad face. She looks at the driver in front her, his face dropping ever so slightly, but enough for it to be noticeable. “It's ok, we can work around it” Lando nodded in agreement with the girl, his face perking up a bit more.
“How far away do you live?” Y/N asks, not caring about how creepy the question can sound. 
Lando laughs, looking down at his food before looking back up at Y/N “I love in Monaco.”
“Shoot.” Y/N sighs, finally breaking eye contact with the beautiful British man. “I don't know if I can do long distance.” 
Landos face falls, his smile faltering to a frown. “Well that's no good is it?” the two fall back slightly in their seats. 
“Am I going to have to move out to Monaco? Or will you stay in England full time?” Y/N asks, forgetting this is just a playful interview, actually thinking about her hypothetical future with Lando.
“Hmmm.” the driver ponders. “Whatever you want I'm good with.” he smiles.
Y/N laughs, playing along she obviously looks past the camera toward her friend Amelia. “I think we might have to move chicken shop to Monaco.” Both girls laugh, Lando blushing at the idea of Y/N moving her whole life to stay with him in a different country. 
The PA looks at the pair, walking around the camera and sneakily handing Y/N a custom made chicken shop trophy. Y/N thanks the PA before holding the trophy up and looking back at Lando. “You may not come first in anything yet, but you are the first F1 driver to go on a date with me.” Y/N holds out the trophy for Lando to take, he “awws” in response.
Lando holds the trophy in his hands, looking down then looking back up at Y/N “hopefully i'm the last F1 driver you have on. I would say our date was pretty successful.” he smiles.
Y/N doesn't hide her blush this time, looking down and laughing slightly before refocusing back at lando. “Maybe, maybe not. We’re still waiting to hear back from Oscar.” 
The director yells cut. The rest of the crew and various team members walk about the shop finishing their own tasks leaving Lando and Y/N to their own. The pair get up from their chairs at the same time, now standing in front of one another.
“Thank you for this again.” Lando says, motioning to the trophy in his hands. “I really had fun today.”
“Me too, thanks for coming, even if you didn't know until yesterday.” the two laugh, a comfortable silence falling between them.
“Hey umm, maybe we could do this again, no cameras or anything. I'm in England for another week or so if you're free.” Y/N is taken aback, did Lando Norris just ask her on a real date.
“I- umm, yeah I would really like that. I'll give you my number so we can plan it.” 
“Perfect!” Lando smiles, pulling his phone out of his back pocket, unlocking it, then handing it to Y/N. Y/N quickly types in her phone number, setting her contact name, and taking a picture of herself for the contact photo before handing the phone back to Lando.
“Well then i'll see you soon Lando” Y/N says, looking up at Lando, taking a small step closer to him.
“I'll see you soon Y/N” he holds his arms out, giving the girl a brief yet firm hug, before getting called away by one of his team members.
Y/N stands in shock. Recapping everything that had just happened since the director started filming. Amelia runs up to her friend, nearly tackling the girl with excitement. “What happened, what did he say?” Amelia interrogates Y/N, having witnessed their interaction from afar.
“I just got a real date with Lando Norris.” Y/N says, pulling out her phone to see a text from Lando with an address and time. It's official, her manifestation had worked and she was now going on a real date with the driver she's had a crush on since he signed with her favorite team. Lando Norris.
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essektheylyss · 3 days
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This was entirely tangential to this post from @utilitycaster which is why this is its own post, but the tags made me think about what feels most compelling about Liliana to me, and it's really because there's such an interesting approach to redemption in terms of the sunk cost fallacy to be had there.
There have been plenty of comparisons between Liliana and Essek, but I don't think they're really situations that can be compared. Essek had done one horrible thing (that was of relevence to the story; it is implied that he's taken other actions that he feels were wrong, but we don't know what those entail nor do the Nein care enough to ask, so per narrative convention, they do not matter for analysis) and was only still involved in it to the extent that he couldn't take it back, so to survive he had to continue covering his tracks. But he was also incentivized to otherwise act in alignment with the group that was not those on behalf of whom he had made terrible choices, because he was still living in the Dynasty, and as such wasn't actively perpetuating those actions beyond the cover up.
Liliana on the other hand is acting with the Vanguard and has been furthering if not personally committing atrocities on their behalf for a number of years, continuing to the present. Like Essek, she believes her involvement in the cause to be a difficult choice that was made for noble reasons, and now can't see a way out. But she is also relieved to be told to stay, though at the point that they discuss her leaving, she is alone and outside the immediate range of contact or oversight from the Vanguard. It seems reasonable that she could disappear with a decent headstart, and perhaps become untraceable quickly enough to be safe from anyone following. With this context, returning to the Vanguard with the intention of feeding information to the opposition feels like the riskier choice, but crucially it is the devil she knows.
I actually liken this more to Cassandra de Rolo than Essek. Cassandra was manipulated against her brother by the Briarwoods, but this was also spurred by having watched Percy seemingly leave her for dead. There are legitimate reasons why the Briarwoods, as the people who rescued her and then kept her alive for many years, are the easier option in which to place her trust. She knows what she's getting from that vantage point and how to handle it. She doesn't inherently have faith that someone she only knew as a young and helpless child, who ran from the hardships she's faced, would have the strength or willingness to do what she has found necessary for survival.
I think that Liliana's actions are more willful, not least because she was not a child nor in mortal peril when she joined the Vanguard, but she sees herself as having made difficult choices when only faced with difficult options, and I do think they have been difficult. She didn't want to leave her family; she doesn't want to hurt the young Ruidusborn under her care; she is probably genuinely sorry that innocent people were considered a necessary sacrifice for what she sees as the greater good. It is psychologically taxing to feel as though one is always picking between bad options, which is a significant contributing factor for why people buy into a sunk cost for so long. And over time, those hard decisions become easier, because you know what to expect from the outcome. Though Liliana is well aware that she might be killed for a misstep among the Vanguard, she already knows how to act to maintain their favor, but how she might be received on Exandria by those fighting the Vanguard, even with the Hells vouching for her, is anyone's guess.
This is a very real reason why people remain in cults and struggle to push back against this kind of conditioning: because the decision to leave feels more immediately perilous than the decision to stay. (On a certain level making these kinds of choices and actions habitual is a fundamental basis behind a lot of military conditioning.) And if you are acting in the interests of your own survival, but that survival comes at the cost of that of countless others who have not, in fact, made any threat or harm against you to begin with, then is the nature of your survival morally defensible?
This analysis isn't a question of whether Liliana will commit to her role as double agent and turn fully against the Vanguard, or even which one of these is a "better" story; this is about what the story might say if she doesn't. Yes, she might commit to a different path than the one she's on and make an effort to redeem herself, but it is also a perfectly coherent and interesting story if she doesn't.
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gardengirl222 · 20 hours
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lene we need some 80s slasher JB!!!
ohh shure! he gives creepy summer camp counselor vibes - 80s!slasher!john b
₊ ⊹ warnings! 18+ - p in v, non con, blood, violence, death, threats, slapping, spitting, obsessed!john b - ₊˚⊹
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you'd gotten the most perfect job for the summer as a camp counselor at a sleep-away summer camp. after meeting everyone at the orientation you've become close to another counselor who will be working with you, john b. 
he was in charge of the boy's cabin and you the girls, and your groups would meet up for activities, bonfires, smores, and lunch. he'd honestly grown really attached to you since you were always doing things together, whenever he'd see you chatting with another guy he'd feel possessive and you weren't even dating! yet john b would also embarrassingly get hard watching you slide down your shorts, staring at how tight your bikini bottoms fit around your ass. he'd spend that night in his cabin jerking off, picturing your pretty body bouncing on top of him, wishing he could grab fistfuls of your ass. he'd finish in his fist all sweaty and out of breath. 
you sat at your group's table in the mess hall facing john b's table, both of you making eye contact every few seconds. 
when the dessert was ready, each table was called to go pick up their plate of cherry pie with vanilla ice cream. john b's eyes followed your figure as you walked up to the counter, waiting until all the little girls got their slices. one of the guys that was working inside the kitchen, clearly flirting with you, asks if you want some. you decline with a smile but the young man insists, saying he made it himself, he lifts up the fork with a piece of the warm pie and dripping ice cream to your lips. you indulge him by opening your mouth and closing it around the fork, swallowing the desert you widen your eyes and nod. "it's really good!" you smile, the guy's hand reaching out to swipe the little bit of ice cream that stayed on the edge of your lip. 
watching this, john b was furious, letting that fucking feed you, touch your lips....
that night, the little girls knock on your cabin door, right next to theirs. they complain that they heard someone scream coming from the mess hall and are too scared to sleep. you tell them it's probably nothing and to go back to sleep, that you'll check it out.
the girls do as they're told and you walk over to the mess hall and walk inside the dark space to see what could have been the noise, hearing some sort of noise coming from inside the kitchen you figure it could be an animal that got inside, you press your ear to the swinging door honestly too scared to actually look inside. 
the door then swings open, causing you to stumble back and meet eyes with john b, with blood on his shirt, hands, and on the knife in his hands. you stand there confused...'did he cut himself?' you think, then you see it, through the open door is the pie guy dead on the floor with his blood pooling around his body. john b's hand is quick to cover your mouth before you can scream, "shshsh, you don't need to do that bub, you're fine." he whispers, maintaining eye contact with you. 
you nod your head slowly, chest heaving. 
"i'm gonna let go now okay? need you to be quite f'me, can you do that?" he raises his eyebrows and you nod again, he takes his hand off our mouth. "m'gonna need to take your clothes off...got blood on them..." he tells you rather than asks you, he raises the knife and cuts your top up the middle. 
"john b? what's going on..." you whisper, clearly scared. 
"i can't wait anymore, you drive me crazy, i need to do this." he rambles while tugging off your shorts rather roughly. 
"john b did you stab the kitchen b-" he cuts you off with a rough kiss to keep you quiet. he manhandles you over one of the tables and lifts you on top, facing him. 
you whine as he brings the knife up to your face. 
"don't scream, don't want to whole camp to hear you, n'i don't want to hurt you pup"
you nod, tears spilling down your cheeks as he cuts your panties to get access to your hot messy pussy. 
"awww she's so pretty..." he coos, his big rough fingers slowly rubbing your clit, making you mewl. 
"jombee...i don't wanna...you killed someone!" you shake your head, almost hyperventilating crying. 
"hey, nuh uh, stop that." he pats your face to get you to listen to him. you watch as he pulls off his bloody shirt and unzips his shorts and pulls himself out, your eyes widening at the size. "he's not the only one i killed." he looks back into your eyes and you swear your heartbeat sped up and so did the pulsing of your cunt. 
"you're a murderer johnbee," you whisper but then gasp when you feel him start to push in, stretching your pussy. 
"i know, m'really mean, huh puppy?" he pouts mockingly and pinches one of your nipples making you squeal. 
"don't like being mean to you, but when you walk around acting like an angel, when i know you're a little tease...kinda have'ta put you in your place," he grunts, pounding into hard now, you can see the little bulge in your tummy. 
"i wasn't! i didn't mean to be! i didn't do anything!" you sob, one hand grabbing onto the table and the other hand gripping his bicep. blood sorta covering both of you from where he had touched you, he grabs your face with his hand and forces you to look at him. 
"wish you could be my good girl right now n'just take. it." he thrusts harder with his last two words. you wish you could scream at how scared you are of him but also at how good it feels. 
"open." he grunts, squeezing your jaw a little. you shake your head no as best you can, causing him to let go of your jaw and slap you, making your drooly cunt clench around him. "m'not asking again." he grabs your jaw again, and you open your mouth, and he spits into it making you whine in disgust. "swallow." you do as your told and swallow tears continuing to fall. 
"that's how a dumb little doggy gets treated, they get spit on." he grins and pulls out of you, manhandles you off the table, and bends you over, tits and face pressed against the wood. 
"nooo...no.." you drool onto the table. 
he bends down a bit to be right in front of your ass and spits on your other tight little hole, watching as his spit drips down to your pussy. you squeeze your eyes shut at the feeling and sob a little louder. 
he stands up straight again and reaches around to pat your sloppy little cunt now covered in his spit, and slides his cock back in. 
"s-so gross..." you mewl, making him laugh quietly, bringing the back of his bloody hand up to your face. 
"cum around me or i'll smear this on your face, you want that? hmm? some guy's blood on your face?" he threatens. "c'mon..." he bends down to press icky wet kisses to your cheek that instantly cum on on him, pulsing and squeezing him as your mind goes dumb. his big hand covering your mouth as you moan.
"there she is, good girl...yeaaah" he praises, thrusting into you more sloppily until he's pumping you full, flooding your poor little pussy. 
after a few seconds, he pulls out and uses his tip to smear yours and his cum around your pussy lips. 
"here." he hands you his bloody shirt for you to put on knowing it'll cover you enough to get back to your cabin decent, you pull his shirt over your head and make sure it covers your ass.
"we'll talk more tomorrow, okay sweetie? gotta go...clean that up." he tilts his head toward the body. "goodnight kiss?" he bits his lip, squinting his eyes, taunting you. you stand there lifting your head, he leans down to give you one last kiss on your lips, a string of saliva connecting your lips when he pulls away.  ᥫ᭡
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woso-dreamzzz · 32 minutes
Text
The Melting Pot
Hardersson x Child!Reader
woso-dreamzzz Kids x Child!Reader (Princesse)
Summary: A melting point of universes
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The school building isn't one that Magda stared at a lot, despite it being just across the street from her house.
It was a selective school, only accepting a handful of students after hours of vetting and interviews. Magda wasn't quite sure what the requirements actually were but she's glad that she passed them.
"Morsa," You say as you stare up at the building," What if they don't like me?"
Magda looks out across the schoolyard, where a small handful of kids are playing around.
There's a section nearer the back with a few little babies. Another section with some kids playing around with a football. A different section with a climbing frame where one little girl is sitting at the very top.
"They'll love you," Magda assures you.
You didn't have the best run of schools in Germany, with one particular teacher scaring you into an anxiety attack so bad Pernille had to pick you up early.
It was one of the reasons that Magda had campaigned so hard for this school. The brochures and the reviews insisted that it was perfectly inclusive and because the pool of students were so small, the classes were really tailored to each child and their needs.
It was perfect and Magda thanks her lucky stares that she had secured a place for you.
"Intimidating, isn't it?"
Magda looks to her side to see a woman standing next to her.
"A little bit," Pernille says politely.
"We thought the same when we first came too."
There's a little girl standing next to her, staring up at Magda with wide eyes.
"It'll get better," Her mother says," I'm Alexia, by the way. This is my Pequeñita."
"Magda. And this is Pernille and Princesse."
"It's nice to meet you. But, really, it'll get better. My girls love it here."
Magda looks at the singular child. "Girls?"
Alexia smiles, jerking her chin to the other side of the road where a tall woman with dark hair is walking over with two children.
"My ex, Jenni."
"You talking bad about me, Ale?" Jenni asks good-naturedly. She's holding the hands of a girl with ribbons in her hair and the other on her hip is gripping the life out of a stuffed fox.
"Always," Alexia teases," This is Magda, Pernille and their daughter. They're new."
"I was wondering who got the new place," Jenni says," Nice to meet you. This is Bambi and Osita. I'd shake your hand but they're full."
Pernille laughs. "It's fine."
You shuffle a bit closer to her, tugging on the sleeve of your jumper as you walk into the schoolyard.
Pequeñita starts pulling away the moment she spots a pack of similar-looking children, zeroing in on the smallest of them and Alexia lets her hand go so she can attach herself to the girl.
Bambi also disappears off to a corner of the playground where a group of girls are making daisychains.
Osita sits in Jenni's arms.
"Hi, there," A cheerful woman that you identify as a teacher says," You must be Miss Harder and Miss Eriksson. It's nice to finally meet you all." She crouches down. "And you must be my new student."
"Hi," You whisper.
"Ah, a shy one. I think you'll fit right in." She looks back at your mothers. "We've still got fifteen-twenty minutes or so before school starts. You're welcome to hang around the playground to get her settled."
"Thank you."
You squeeze Morsa's hand tight as she leads you around the playground.
There are still a lot of parents hanging around so you don't feel awkward still clinging to Momma and Morsa.
You stay mainly silent as you stare out across the playground.
"Lots of blended families," Momma notes, jerking her head around the playground at where she's noticed exes and custody agreements that are clearly a little sour.
"Inclusive too," Morsa says.
There's a little baby wearing hearing aids sitting on her mummy's lap over in the corner with the rest of the babies.
"International as well."
You're in a melting pot of languages and culture, something you can pick out even over all the shrieking of the playground.
There's languages you recognise and accents that you don't.
You relax a little.
There's a shriek nearby and you turn your head to see that throng of similar-looking girls wrestling around while a tall woman sighs and her smaller partner tries to separate them.
"Big family," Morsa laughs as the smaller woman gets tackled to the ground by the rest of her kids.
You're still looking around when a football comes rolling to a stop in front of you.
You look at it.
A group of girls come running over.
"Can we have our ball back please?" It's one of the taller ones that ask, the one that looks fairly similar to the group that's tackled their mummy to the ground.
You nod, gently kicking it back. She grabs it, turning to go.
"What's that?" A smaller girl points at your bag.
"It's my Wolfsburg keychain."
"Wolfsburg? Like the football club?"
You nod. "We used to live in Germany. Wolfsburg is our German team."
"Who's your English team?"
"Arsenal."
The smaller girl shoves her way forward, holding out her hand. "I'm Bean," She says," My team's Arsenal too."
"And mine!"
"That's Bug. She's technically my niece because my sister Leah's her mummy even though we're the same age."
"Hi," You say, gently letting go for Morsa and Momma's hands to shake Bean's.
"And this is Peanut and Nena," Bean continues," We play football together. Tesoro too but she's late because her sister Lessi likes staying in bed as long as possible."
Bean passes the ball off to her niece, who does a round of fairly impressive keepy-uppies.
"Do you play?"
You nod. "I play keeper."
"Cool!" Peanut interrupts," We don't have a keeper yet! Do you want to play with us?"
"Yes, please."
You go to move away but Morsa draws you back.
"Hey," She says," We're going to go, alright? Are you good here?"
"Uh-huh!"
Momma gives you a kiss and a cuddle and Morsa does the same before you're released.
You run into goal just in time for Bug to release a wicked shock that you jump up to collect easily.
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raapija · 3 days
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For the pookie au, how did Nando propose? Were Carlos, Oscar and Lando around for it? Did he discuss it with them? Did they help him plan it? I would love to hear your thoughts
[This turned into a whole thing again, so... You're welcome? 😭]
They're all on a family vacation in somewhere like Greece or a Spanish island and at the beach.
Lance is draped in towels and has a sunhat and shades on. He's lounging under a massive umbrella to try and keep his sensitive Canadian skin from burning in the sun. Everyone else is beautifully golden brown and enjoying the beach and sea.
Fernando stumbles over, bringing Lance a new bottle of cold water and slumps down beside him on the sand.
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"Here, cariño." he says while giving the water to Lance, who snakes a hand out from underneath the towels and rests the cold bottle against his chest to cool down.
"The guys seem to be having fun." Lance says and they look over towards the shore, where Carlos, Lando and Oscar are trying to drown each other in the shallow water while manically laughing and scaring the other beach-goers.
"My boys." Fernando says proydly. He then digs a loose piece of dried up seaweed from the sand and starts to fiddle with it.
"Next time we go somewhere like Sweden. Or Antarctica. Somewhere cold." Lance quips and takes a swig from the water bottle, enjoying the coldness going down his throat. Fernando humms and keeps fiddling with the seaweed.
"I'm going to get a heatstroke, then burn to a crisp in the sun and ultimately die and you all look so comfortable." Lance nagged. "I don't get it. Is it the Spanish genes? No, Oscar is Aussie... Or is it hot in Australia, too? I don't fucking know... You're all freaks."
"Here," Fernando interrupted his rant and stretches his hand towards Lance. Lance moves his shades up to see what he is offering. "For you."
"For me? What is this?" Lance asked and studies the tiny seaweed creation Fernando had fabricated. He had somehow managed to weave it into a perfect little loop.
"Will you marry me?" Fernando then asked and Lance snorted, amused at the sudden question. It must be a joke, so he laughed and put the seaweed ring on his left ring finger.
"Wow, this is beautiful." the Canadian said, half impressed that it actually fit and half mockingly because it was so dumb.
"I'm serious, Lance." Fernando said with a little more gravity in his voice. "I want you to marry me."
Lance looked at him, eyes big and in shock. But Fernando's expression didn't crack, he was serious. Lance swallowed and then continued:
"Really?"
"Sí, really."
"Okay..."
"Is that a yes?"
"Yeah."
Lance was a bit flustered. He hadn't expected this at all. Sure, he and Fernando had been together for a while, but this? Yeah, it was still sudden. He didn't mind it, though.
"Tomorrow we go buy you a nicer one. Gold. A diamond, whatever you want." Fernando smiled and Lance huffed. Fernando would always buy him something super expensive only for Lance to lose it somewhere or wear it once.
"Buy a nice ring for you, how about that?" Lance said. Fernando chuckled and nodded, climbing back up and dusting sand off his legs and butt. He then leaned down once again to plant a big, wet kiss on Lance's lips and ran off back towards his kids. Lance sunk deeper into the towels around him and looked at the seaweed ring.
"Hmm..." he hummed and trailed a careful finger over it. Married. Sure. That could be fun.
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if-loki-was-a-fox · 2 days
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The one thing about thinking about the clockers is that I don't think they work quite as well as a literal based in concrete canon and every thing that brings with it, so much as they're like. Two steps back looking at the big picture (themes and allegory or something ig. Or an AU almost. Or a story being told inside the story)
Because to an extent I don't think clockers works as well when you try to put them in with everything that happened before Limited Life, unless you see Clockers not as a literal family unit but rather a sort of... Not found family, but constructed family? Like a story they've made up for themselves as an odd round about way to cope with the Death Games.
And this would apply to and explain other relationships that pop up too, like jokes about marriage and divorce. Like Bdubs and Etho in Last Life. Because maybe it's just a bit easier to understand a divorce than it is to understand the world tearing you apart from your closest friend and demanding that you kill or be killed, and it would be so much easier if you were being separated because you were mad at each other, and it was your choice, and you could pretend you have some modicum of control over the situation
So then the clockers, the flower husbands, divorce duo, the ahasbands, would all just be constructed relationships to fill missing holes, to explain their actions and events around them, and to bring some sense of familiarity and stability to this chaos
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mikey hc? good tl ofc 🫶
Ok here are some!!!
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He still kicked Kazutora's dad even though he now knew he wasn't a kidnapper
He pouts after losing a race. (He also eats taiyaki before every race because it's "good luck")
Refuses to fight Senju in their toman years, she keeps chasing him declaring a spar while he keeps running off (Sanzu and Baji normally end up holding her back so Mikey can run)
Will nap in the most unusual places to avoid work and training 
Argues with Izana after Emma has her baby over who the baby's favourite uncle is. 
Offers to beat up Kiyomasa before Takemichi ever has to meet him again (Takemichi says no)
He gets so excited to meet Draken that he calls him "ken chin" straight away and manages to act even more strange then the first time.
Still manages to forget to put petrol in his street hawke when they go to the beach again (he doesn't let Baji go alone this time though)
He shares so many inside jokes with Takemichi, the others are sometimes confused as to what they're talking about. (One time he mentioned how good Hina is at hitting but Hina was just confused because she's never hit him???)
Pouts if the others tease him about being single 
Actually tends to be a little more cautious in fights, especially with new enemies in this timeline. And he keeps a much closer eye on the rest of the gang during fights.
Comes up with a plan to try and get Emma and Draken to confess to each other (it doesn't go well)
He straight up forgets about less important fights and people he beat. Will ask Takemichi who someone is often.
He really likes that he gets to call Izana is his brother here and has another sibling.
Wants everyone to watch and cheer for him on race days. 
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