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marvelfansince08love · 4 years

Text

My best friend and my sister

Word count: 3714

Pairing: Tammy x Miller!Reader (Lou’s younger sister)

Prompts requested: 1 “Why didn’t you tell me” 18 “How could you be so irresponsible?”

A/N: For my sweet Anon, I hope you enjoy x Sorry it’s taking so long to get these out, I’ve been very burnt out recently but I’m back on track now!

Tags: @waitingfortheendtocome @natasha-danvers @saucy-sapphic @witchxaf @creepingwolfberry @chewbacca0805 @coconutlipss

Prompts 1 & 18

You and Lou had always been close growing up. Having such a cool older sister had its perks. Like when you were eight years old and you had pleaded and begged for that toy you had spotted in the window but your parents had shook their heads, not having enough money to afford ‘special gifts’. Those were only reserved for birthdays and Christmas’s. You had walked out of the store devastated with tears in your eyes until Lou walked you around the corner and revealed the toy from the depths of her long coat, a finger to her lips and a wink keeping the secret gift between you both. Lou had been seventeen then and was struggling to find a part time job to help pay some of the family's bills and so she could buy you gifts.

“Every kid should have a few toys growing up. Including you, Y/N.” She would say.

Once Lou had reached the sweet old age of twenty-one, an opportunity had presented itself before her, one that she just couldn't refuse. One right where the tall green statue stood proud overlooking the city of dreams. New York City was Lou's chance to make something of herself and, who were you to deny her of that?

"This could be good for us, Y/N! I could make enough money to bring you over and you can live with me!" She had exclaimed, excitement filling her youthful blue eyes. You had nodded and basked in her excitement, the dreading feeling of abandonment slowly creeping its way through into your chest.

Once you had turned eighteen, Lou had kept to her promise of bringing you over to the big city, flying first class from Australia and leaving your parents down under, ready to start your new life; a better life.

You had lived with Lou while studying in New York. Your apartment was small, but enough for the two of you. That was, until Lou introduced you to the infamous Deborah Ocean. The woman was beautiful and mysterious, her words carefully calculated, her dark eyes taking in the room before she had even stepped into it. You thought she was pretty badass compared to your older sister, especially when you found out what they did for a living. The ‘jobs’ that they did helped keep you both afloat through your first few years in New York City, especially when the bigger jobs were coming through, which helped you move into a bigger, fancier place that you could call home.

That was the day you fell in love with the most breath-taking human you had ever laid eyes on. The woman was average height, her blonde hair resting against her breasts in soft curls. The small dark freckle on the corner of her upper lip drawing you in and oh, that wide smile that lit up her whole face making her brown eyes sparkle ever so slightly under the sunlight that seeped into the open living room space where you had stood, staring a little too long at this stunning woman.

"Stop drooling, kid. You're gonna end up needing the mop at this rate and we haven't even put an offer in yet," Debbie had whispered to you, teasing your love sick expression. You had snapped out of your gaze at that remark, stuttering over your words trying to defend yourself. You both stood and watched as Lou and this beautiful blonde discussed the price by the bay window overlooking the busy streets of New York. Tammy was her name, and it was the most beautiful name you had ever heard of, her soft voice showing a tiny hint of a lisp making you swoon just that bit more for her.

She was an old friend of Debbie's who knew just the right places for the best prices around the area, she had also helped with some of the more high profiled jobs when needed, mainly moving various illegal items across borders. You looked at the sweet blonde in awe, wondering how a woman like that could look so innocent and sweet.

You had never gotten over that first meeting with Tammy but as the years went by and you matured into a strong minded individual, you realised that you'd rather ignore that pining feeling and continue on with your life as if nothing had changed within you that day. As if you hadn't pictured her breathless beneath you while you buried your fingers deep inside her throbbing heat or how good her left hand would look with a diamond ring on her finger letting everyone know she is yours and you are hers.

No, she was a friend of your sister… your older sister, and a good friend at that.

'Still, it doesn't stop you from thinking about how sweet she would sound moaning your name,' You think bitterly to yourself, hating that you still have this pull to her.

That’s why you totally weren’t stalking her social media page as you entered your shared apartment with your older sister and her best friend. Briefcase in hand and your eyes glued to your phone screen, eyes transfixed on the sweet blonde who’s smile still makes your stomach flutter.

You were so invested in your scrolling that you had missed the knowing smirk shared between your sister and her best friend.

“Hey Kid, how was your first day on the job?” Lou asks, hiding her smirk beneath her coffee mug as Debbie lays out the new flooring plans for their next big job. You look up at the sound of her voice, taking in the blue papers on the living room table.

“Yeah, it was good! The students were lovely and eager, which was encouraging.” You gush, the excitement from your first successful day distracting you from the breath-taking photos of your secret crush.

“God, just the thought of college makes me shiver now. Thank god I develop my skills as a con artist.” Debbie jokes, her eyes trained on the carefully mapped out plan. You move to sit next to her, leaning your chin onto her shoulder pointing at an unmarked area on the layout plans.

“If you place the camera chip by the corner on the east wing here, that should cover up to the left side of the entryway down the hall.” You mumble, before grabbing Debbie’s hot coffee and taking a sip. Lou scoffs from her seat across but you can spot the pride in her eyes. Living with two very intelligent con artists has its perks. Debbie kisses the top of your head with enthusiasm.

“You’re the best, pumpkin. Still think you’re going down the right career path?” She questions, a playful smirk appearing on her lips making you shake your head as you move towards your bedroom.

“You guys have your thing, I have mine. Besides, I’m far too good for your lil crew, Ocean.” You joke, turning to wink at the brunette before heading into your room. You falter slightly upon closing your door hearing your sister’s voice shout through to you from the other side.

“The ‘crew’ are coming over later to go through the plan. You wanna join us?!” You bump your head lightly against your wooden door, already feeling the knowing smirks coming from both women.

“Maybe. I’ll see how I feel later.” You reply against the door, before moving away and removing your work clothes piece by piece, leaving a trail of material towards the en-suite bathroom.

Placing your phone on the drawer by the bathroom door, you head in for a shower completely missing the new text message from your favourite blonde.

Hey darling! I hope your first day went well. Can’t wait to hear all about it tonight! Tam x

***

Writing up the last few lines for your lesson plans, you look towards the digital clock on your desk as your stomach flutters in anticipation at seeing the blonde. You see, you may have never seeked out your intentions with Tammy but you would be fooling yourself if you thought you were over your silly crush on the woman.

A loud knock on your door interrupts your thoughts.

“Y/N! They’ll be here soon, are you joining us or not?” Lou’s deep voice came muffled from the other side of your door.

“Uh, yeah. Let me finish up this lesson plan and I’ll be out.” You reply, distracted by your thoughts. Shaking your head, you refocus back onto the task at hand before you can let your thoughts trail off into a much more filthier place.

You continue to write in your planner making sure that every detail has been looked over at least twice wanting everything to be perfect, completely unaware of the unannounced presence that stands by your doorway leaning heavily against the doorframe, soft eyes gazing lovingly at your hunched over figure.

“Hey, you.”

The voice startles you from your productivity, making you gasp and swirl around swiftly at the unexpected voice. Hand on chest, you try to catch your breath as the sweet angelic sound of Tammy’s laughter echoes throughout the bedroom.

“Oh my god, Tammy! You gotta warn me next time.” You breathe, turning back to rearrange your notepad and planner. Tammy chuckles this time before pushing away from the doorframe and making herself comfortable at the foot of the bed.

“I’m sorry darling, but we’ve been out there for nearly an hour and well.. I missed you. We haven’t hung out with you much lately and we’re missing our most valuable member of the crew.” She confesses, a small smile playing on her lips as she takes in your room. You feel your heart flutter at the thought of her missing you, but you quickly squish down the thought knowing she didn’t mean just her but the rest of the gang.

“Oh shit! I hadn’t realised the time. You guys haven’t ordered yet, right?” You ask, eyes hopeful and mouth watering at the thought of some delicious greasy pizza.

“We have..” You pout at her words before watching her smile wide at you. “But don’t worry Y/N, I ordered your favourite.” She informs you with a smug expression. You leap out of your chair and practically leap towards her, placing your arms around her shoulder you press a big kiss to her cheek before moving away just as quickly heading for the living room.

“This is why you’re my favourite, Tam Tam.” You exclaim, already out of the room before she could blink. Within your excitement you missed how the blonde touched her cheek where you had placed the kiss onto her scorching skin, a tint of pink blushing across her cheeks.

Yeah, you weren’t the only one smitten.

***

Over the next few days, you had helped your sister and her crew form the perfect plan to take over the new Randervelt Museum and their very expensive art pieces. Debbie had dropped enough hints that you ended up being a part of the plan.

“We can’t do this without you, Y/n.”

“The money is good.”

How could you say no? After all, you were a Miller and the thrill of a heist had always been appealing to you ever since your sister brought you along to your first one when you turned 21. “It’s tradition”, Lou had said.

During that time, you had noticed Tammy had been awfully quiet around you. Sometimes you would catch her staring just a little too long at you before she would turn away and engage in conversation with one of the others, as if nothing was wrong. You had tried to talk to her about her odd behaviour but every time you got her alone, she would make some kind of excuse to not be around you.

You’d be lying if you said it didn’t hurt but the plan had gone smoothly with everyone accounted for, all except for well... you.

“Where is she, Constance?” Tammy raged through her earpiece, getting ready to jump back out of the van and go searching for you herself.

“She’s got caught up with that big ass guard. I’m going to intervene to see if I can get her out of the way.” Constance replies, far too calm for her liking.

“What do you mean caught up with the guard?! What’s he saying to her?”

“I dunno but, uh… it seems like he’s flirting with her.” Tammy gulps slightly at that, feeling her stomach drop.

“Well, get him to back off before I come in there and do it myself.” She says through gritted teeth.

“Alright girl, chill the F out. I’ll go get your girl.” She mumbles into her ear. Tammy’s eyes widen at the blunt statement as she hears quiet chuckling from the others.

“Ladies, can we please focus? This is my sister and I swear to god if anything happens to her I- just… Constance, go and get her. Me and Debbie are going to bring round the other truck so we can transfer the paintings over to you, got it?” Lou’s authoritative voice crackles through the earpiece. A collective of sorry's are mumbled across the team as everyone returned back to the task at hand. Tammy holds her breath, waiting for Constance's confirmation of a safe exit with you in toe.

“Got her. We’re on our way out now, be ready for us.”

She can finally breathe again.

***

The journey back to the warehouse was quiet and tense. Tammy tried to let go of the pent up frustration and unwanted anger of having you in such a situation in the first place, but she couldn’t seem to drop it. That is, if her knee bouncing rapidly had anything to say about it.

You kept your eyes fixed on the empty seat across from you, knowing that a certain pair of brown doe eyes were burning into your skull from the spot across. Once you had all entered the apartment, the team disperses towards the living area bringing in the pieces one by one.

Tammy is no longer able to keep her thoughts to herself, the words ready to spill from her throat.

“How could you be so irresponsible?” She scolded, turning towards you.

Your eyes widen as you gape at her, showing your shock at her blunt words.

You can hear Lou chastising Tammy quietly in warning from across the room, but from the look on the blonde's face she wasn’t about to listen to her friend.

“Excuse me?” You exclaim, taking a step closer to her.

“You could have gotten into some serious trouble back there Y/N, if that guy had caught onto what you were doing.. You need to be more careful.” She lectured, trying to slow down her rapid breathing knowing that secretly, deep down, it wasn’t your fault.

“Are you being serious right now?!” You question, baffled by her defensive behaviour.

“I knew it was a bad idea putting you in danger like that. I should have said something.” Tammy mutters to herself, but her words are clear enough for you to hear.

“What do you mean, Tam? Is that why you’ve been so weird with me? I knew there was something up with you.” You summarize, pointing an accusing finger at the blonde. You notice at the corner of your eye, the other woman silently leaving the room, clearly not wanting to be involved.

Your eyes catch your sisters, her crystal blue eyes staring back at you with understanding and knowing, baffling you even more before Debbie escorts her reluctant form out of the room, knowing that you are old enough to deal with the problem at hand.

“Okay, fine! I was pissed off, alright? I hated the fact that you were dragged into yet another job, an illegal job might I add. You are doing something good with your life right now, darling. I don’t want you getting mixed up in all of this. You’re too good for this.” She says, indicating towards the stolen art pieces. You frown at just how concerned she is with your involvement.

“Why do you care so much, Tam? I’m just your best friend's kid sister, remember?” You mock, remembering back to the time when you overheard her conversation with Debbie about your odd relationship with the older woman.

“She’s young, Debs. I’m merely being a friend.” Those were her words back then and they still stung to this day.

Tammy drops her gaze, shame evident, remembering how she saw your retreating form from the corner of her eye back when she spoke to Debbie about her confusing feelings towards you.

“I only said that because I was too scared to admit how I actually felt about you, Y/N.” Her voice soft, faltering slightly under her confession. Her eyes bright with unshed tears, her shoulders dropping as if the weight of her secret love for you has been lifted. You gape at the woman in front of you, overwhelmed with uncertainty and hope.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” You managed to croak out, unable to form further words.

Tammy shrugs her shoulders in defeat, before slowly meeting your conflicted gaze. You could see the vulnerability in those big brown eyes, making you step towards her. That instant pull between you growing stronger just like it had during that first meeting.

“What, and tell your sister ‘oh hey, I know I’m one of your closest friends but I’m in love with your younger sister’? I don’t think that would have gone down well back then, do you?” You both chuckle slightly realising how ridiculous this all is.

“I’m pretty sure she’s known something was going on,” you pause for a minute, thinking carefully about your next words. “Because I dunno if you know this, but I’ve been in love with you since I first laid my eyes on you.” You confess, folding your arms across your chest as if to protect yourself from your own words.

Before you could apologise or take back your words, scared by the fallen silence that has settled between you both, Tammy walks the last few steps towards you placing her hands gently against your jaw, cupping your face within the palms of her hands. The tenderness within her hold makes you want to cry at just how much love seeps from her one single touch.

“I would very much like to kiss you.” She whispers, her lips an inch away from your own. You close your eyes basking in the moment before you reply.

“Then, do it.” Her lips clash with your own at your words, desperate as if they’ve been waiting a million years just to touch your own soft lips. Her tongue traces along your bottom lip making you part your lips ever so slightly but enough for her to trace her tongue along your own, fighting for dominance. Bringing your hands up, you thread your fingers through long blonde locks keeping her close not wanting to break away just yet. You continue with this fight for dominance with your mouths before the distinctive sound of someone gagging makes you break apart.

Turning your heads to the side, you both see Lou and the others stood by the doorway with stupid grins on their faces. All except for Lou, who was fake gagging next to Debbie who just rolled her eyes at her best friend's antics.

“Are you guys done sucking each other's faces? Because I wanna order pizza.” Nine says with indifference, before moving into the room and towards the kitchen where the food menus lay scattered on the kitchen island table.

The others laugh watching as you both fluster at being caught making out like teenagers. You eye up your sister who has been very quiet about the whole exchange, feeling Tammy shift uncomfortably next to you clearly waiting for your sister to react.

You keep a supportive arm around her waist, silently telling her that no matter what you’re both stronger than the rejection. Lou walks agonizingly slowly towards you both with a stoic face, giving nothing away while Debbie rolls her eyes at her friend's dramatics, once again.

“My best friend and my sister...” Is all she says, as if trying to piece the information together out loud.

You gulp once she’s up close to you, standing with her arms crossed as her eyes flicker between you and Tammy. The silent exchange feels like it goes on for a century before she breaks out into a huge smile, showing her pearly white teeth and her arms out wide towards you both.

“My best friend and my sister!” She exclaims excitingly, before pulling you both into a three-way hug. You both lock eyes over your sister’s shoulder, relief evident in those perfect brown eyes making you grin softly.

“Yeah, me and your sister, Lou.” Tammy says as she laughs at your sister's antics. Lou pulls back, holding your shoulders with her hands eyeing your now clasped hands.

“Just don’t make it gross, yeah? She’s still my little sister and I will kick your arse if you hurt her, Tam Tam.” Lou threatens, but the tone of her voice clearly shows she’s only half joking.

You roll your eyes at your sister’s empty threat before she bops you on the nose, which you bat away with your free hand.

“That goes for you as well, kid. She’s still one of my best friends, you hurt her in any way then me and you will be having words. Got it?” She promises, before winking and walking back towards the kitchen where the others have been not so subtly listening in to the exchange.

You look at the blonde in front of you, taking in her soft features and perfect smile, overwhelmed with love for this woman in front of you. Leaning in, you kiss the corner of her mouth softly.

“I could never hurt you Tam Tam. Who would get my pizza order right, if not you?” You tease, watching the mischievous glint burn within her brown eyes as she playfully shoves you.

“You, dork.” Grabbing her hand quickly, you place it over your heart and whisper.

“But I’m your dork,” you smile cheekily at her.

“Yeah, my dork.” She confirms, her adoring eyes gazing into your own thinking to herself.

Finally.

#tammy x reader #sarah paulson x reader #oceans 8 #lou miller x reader #tammy is an angel #sarah paulson #lou miller #debbie ocean

346 notes · View notes

i-love-side-characters · 3 years

Note

What did you think of the end of The Toll?

!!! TOLL SPOILERS !!! PROCEED WITH CAUTION !!!

Scythe Cult: @honorablescythecurie @honorablescythefaraday @palli-x @book-limerence @lochscinders @a-lonely-tatertot @shellyseashell

bored? send me serotonin please <3

Okay now lets get a couple things out of the way. I haven’t read Toll in a little bit, and it’s taking forever to come from the library. Also, yes I did have it downloaded before, but I kept rereading Faraday’s journal entry when he find out Curie is dead. I know, I’m trash for them but honestly let me have this #curiedeservedbetter2021 #faradaydeservedbetter2021 #curadayforlife

Now that we’ve established that I’m just lonely and so I cling onto healthy (ish) fictional couples for my source of love, let’s proceed.

Things I remember:

- Rowan and Citra go zoomy zoom into spacey space, but Citra’s deadish because Goddard pulled some shit and so Rowan’s going to wait a couple hundred years for her to wake up

- Total hottie Ayn Rand shanked Goddard which is honestly a power move you go girl

- Faraday and Munira unleashed the failsafe, which basically infected a whole bunch of people and now Scythes just kill the infected people so that there’s no suffering

- Jeri!!! and Greyson!!! Babeys!!! Smol Beans!!! My genderfluid babey with my weird Jesus man it’s a match made by the Thunderhead (because it literally is)

- Rowan and Citra (who renounced her Scythehood) are going to start a new colony on some random ass planet

Things I don’t remember:

- Whatever happen with Cirrus

- Whatever happen with Joel the Jobe Man

- Whatever happen with Loriana and Munira who are totally in love Shusterman said Sapphic rights

Okay Akki stfu lets move on:

Okay. I didn’t really like it. I did like Rowan’s sarcasm, but the ending fell a little flat. Compared to the other books’ endings, I didn’t really think it measured up. It was just a bit bland. Here’s why.

The end goal:

Let’s just work our way through the series to show why The Toll just didn’t really work for me.

Scythe - Book 1:

Goal/Climax:

The goal/climax of the book was clear. Citra and Rowan are fighting for the ring. Only one can get it, and the winner has to glean the other.

The ending:

Citra wins the ring, and is ordained. Instead of actually killing (gleaning) Rowan, she slyly grants him immunity by punching him so that his blood’s DNA would transfer to the database and no Scythe could kill him. We also got a confession scene where they tell each other they love the other. It ends with Rowan finding out that Faraday did not self-glean.

Why it works:

It is tense. We are watching the two main characters have to either kill the other or be killed. Neither want to. It is clear from their actions throughout that they harbour feelings for each other. This is a high stakes situation. And it flows nicely. We don’t have any unnecessary dialogue/scenes. We don’t have a dumb solution to the problem where a bunch of unnecessary events happen like a character death/romantic scene. They do tell the other that they love them, but the moment is quick and is not the focus of the moment. The focus is on the actual ordainment ceremony and the challenge. The solution directly addresses the main conflict of the book.

Thunderhead - Book 2:

Goal/Climax:

Goddard and Citra (now Anastasia) are presenting their arguments as to who will win the inquest. The inquest was called because Anastasia and Curie needed time to gain more votes in favour of Curie for the position of High Blade.

The ending:

Anastasia and Curie win the inquest, and Goddard must complete a full new apprenticeship in order to train his new body. Goddard, however, has tricks up his sleeve. He had made a plan prior to the events on Endura to cripple the Grandslayers tower. The plan changes, but works to his favour and destroys the entire island. Curie, in a desperate attempt to save Rowan and Citra, locks them in an airtight chamber that will preserve them so they can be revived. With this sacrifice, Curie is forced to self glean.

“She thrust her blade inward, directly into her heart. She fell to the ground only seconds before the sea would wash over her, but she knew death would wash over her faster. And the blade hurt far less than she imagined it would, which made her smile. She was good. Very, very good.”

-Thunderhead, page 499

Why it works:

*violently screams in my head* I’m good don’t worry

It is a logical ending. If Curie and Anastasia had won the inquest and survived Endura, there would be no need for a third book, unless Shusterman had decided to write a book about Curie being High Blade and Goddard sulking in the shadows and plotting to kill her. That wouldn’t work because I don’t think there is any possible way Curie wouldn’t catch Goddard in two seconds because she’s a boss.

Many people say that Curie should have gotten Rowan to lock her and Anastasia in the vault instead of him. Rowan would have died for Anastasia, it makes sense, but that takes away from the very essence of Curie’s character. She is a truly Honourable Scythe. She knows that Anastasia loves him, and she cares deeply about Anastasia. Letting herself survive would have been completely out of character. She also knows that Anastasia is the future of the Scythedom. While it would be a great help if Curie didn’t die, as well as sparing us emotional trauma, it doesn’t make sense for her character.

This ending also directly “solved” the issue in the book. While the villain won, it was a satisfying ending. Curie is dead, that was a very smart move, because obviously Goddard wouldn’t survive two seconds if she was there. It gave us a good reason for the Thunderhead to disappear.

*violently screams again* Curie died, yeah, no, I’m okay

The Toll - Book 3: *note that some details may be wrong

Goal/Climax:

Faraday, Rowan, Jeri, Munira, Loriana, Anastasia, Greyson, and Cirrus need to figure out what to with the frozen Tonists, all unknowing that Scythes Goddard and Rand are heading towards the island. They still need to beat him in order to make sure that the non-Scythe population won’t be subject to bias/malice/aforethought/Goddard’s ego.

The ending:

Rowan, and Citra, who renounced her Scythehood, travel to another planet that can support life with the frozen Tonists, as well as 42 other ships carrying Tonists. Cirrus is copied into 42 different versions in order to save humanity. After being offered Citra’s old ring, Munira (I believe) returns to the Library of Alexandria. Faraday follows through with the failsafe and gleans only the suffering. Greyson and Jeri stay together on the island, and become romantically involved. Scythe Rand is the one who eventually kills Goddard.

Why it DOESN’T work:

Okay, there’s a lot to unpack here. I’m just going to go character by character and by the plot.

1. Plot - It just doesn’t make sense. The hero’s solution doesn’t in any way stop Goddard, who is the main villain. We’ve led up to this for a very long time, and Rand is the one who gleans him. If I’m correct, The main characters don’t interact with Goddard for nearly the entire book, save Rowan. The solution, to save humanity by colonizing other planets would, without Rand’s interference, let Goddard wreak his havoc on the world. Only Scythe Faraday and Morrison could truly challenge him, and even then Faraday is old and hasn’t kept his abilities refined, and Morrison is young and inexperienced and wears a denim robe.

2. Rand and Goddard’s Arcs - Rand is the one who kills Goddard. I think that this was a very interesting move, and one that made a lot of sense. Goddard has treated her terribly, it would satisfy her arc of turning against him, as well as giving her a redemption arc that would also avenge Tyger’s death. I think that this is actually a really good arc, were it not for the fact that Citra and Goddard never fought/interacted with each other. If there had been a fight, and Rand had killed him then, that would have been better and would have better satisfied the actual conflict in the book.

3. Rowan and Citra’s Arcs - In terms of Citra’s arc, I think it was emotionally impactful to have her renounce her Scythehood. But Rowan didn’t have as much of a part to play in this book as he could have had. Citra and Goddard also never interacted, which would have been very interesting since he was the direct cause of her mentor and canon mother figure’s death. It would have been an interesting scene that could have played out really well. Based on Discord texts from a conversation I had, I know an reminded that the last two pages of The Toll were incredibly impactful and beautiful. I don’t have much to say about Rowan since I don’t remember much of his role.

4. Jeri, Greyson, Loriana, and Munira’s Arcs - I paired these four together since their doings aren’t very solid after the books. Jeri and Greyson are canonically together, which I think was a great move by Shusterman. Having a main character in a healthy relationship with a canon LGBTQ+ character was incredibly impactful for me, and it satisfied Greyson’s thoughts about how he doesn’t care if Jeri is a boy or a girl, he just loves them. Loriana didn’t have as much of an arc, but Munira did have a small one. Her refusal of the Scythe’s ring let her dispense of her hatred for Scythes and their system, and let her let go of her bitter feelings about not being ordained.

5. Cirrus’ Arc? - I do not remember enough to speak about Cirrus’ role in the books.

6. Faraday’s Arc - This is probably the one I have the most to say about. I am sorry in advance. Faraday is an emotional character. He has cried canonically twice as far as I can remember, once when he gleaned a child, and the other when he found out Scythe Curie and Anastasia had died on Endura. He is also openly disgusted with Scythe Goddard and his practices, which is why I supremely dislike his arc. It would have been so interesting to see how he would have reacted if Scythe Goddard and the heroes had interacted during the end scene of The Toll. We know he is an Honourable Scythe, like Curie, and upholds the Scythe Commandments, especially after his punishment over his breaking of the 9th commandment “Thou shalt have no spouse nor spawn.” It would have been so. interesting. to see whether Faraday would snap and attack Goddard, if he would try and talk to him, how he would react. Like with Anastasia, he would have been interacting with Curie’s murderer. The potential of that moment! Don’t forget that Faraday is definitely still in love with Curie, based on his elevated heart rate in Thunderhead, and his journal entry in The Toll. I think it would have been so interesting to see him confront her killer.

Summary:

Okay that was much longer than I intended, and I have more thoughts, but it’s 2:40 am and I haven’t slept in a while. So my summary. I liked The Toll. It was a solid book, that had funny moments, jaw dropping moments, heartfelt moments, and emotionally impactful scenes. It was a solid book.

I don’t think it compared as much to the other two, especially Thunderhead. The ending fell a little flat and didn’t carry the arcs as well as I would have liked, but honestly, I still reread it. Shusterman really managed to pull at your emotions.

Because I just beat up on the book for the last couple paragraphs, let me tell you some of my favourite parts of the book.

1. Literally any scene with Possuelo and Anastasia that dynamic was so good and him calling her “meu anjo” literally made my heart do a little happy dance the father-daughter dynamic was what we needed. It also offered a nice levity to tough scenes.

2. The Rowan-Anastasia Reunion. They ran towards each other and knocked each other off their feet. Ohhhh my god, they ran towards each other and knocked each other off their feet! That was so cute, and as someone who was a strong supporter of platonic Rowan & Anastasia, I honestly loved it.

3. Faraday-Anastasia Reunion. Him dropping to his knees in front her her, her initial confusion as to who he was, and the “perhaps the greatest of all Scythes was kneeling in front of her” part killed me. Their reunion was so well written and heart-wrenching.

4. Anastasia Cries about Curie’s Death. I feel like WatchMojo right now. Anyways, the way her emotions break after trying to repress her sadness over her mentor’s sacrifice for her.

5. Rowan’s sarcasm. Beauty. What a power move to sass the guy who’s going to set you on fire in front of 3000 people.

6. Scythe Constantine and Rand. What a dynamic I wasn’t ready for. Rand’s cool comebacks with Constantine’s sly personality just made for the most amazing dialogue opportunities.

Thank you anon!

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aeipcthys · 3 years

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╰ ❛ 💉 — › miranda otto. cis-female. she/her. ╯ have you met celeste white yet ? this fifty year old taurus has been living in the seattle area for one month. she makes a living as head of general surgery, which is best suited for their cunning, protective, egotistical, and stubborn personality. dream a little dream of me by doris day is one of their favorite songs.

trigger warnings: abuse, alcoholism, misogyny, adultery, age difference, divorce, estranged parents

full character page here

BASIC INFORMATION

Full Name: celeste adella white

Nickname(s): you’ll call her celeste and like it

Age: 50

Date of Birth: april 30, 1970

Hometown: manchester, england

Current Location: seattle, washington

Ethnicity: white (english, german)

Nationality: english

Gender: cisgender female

Pronouns: she/her/hers

Orientation: queen of the sapphics, but pansexual (believes sexuality is fluid)

Status: divorced, single

Religion: agnostic

Political Affiliation: liberal leaning

Occupation: head of general surgery (specializes in minimally invasive & robotic surgeries)

Living Arrangements: lives alone and will not tell you where she lives but you can bet it’s bougie af

Language(s) Spoken: english, german

Accent: english

PHYSICAL APPEARANCE

Face Claim: miranda otto

Hair Color: red

Eye Color: green

Height: 5'5

Weight: 128 lbs

Build: slim

Tattoos: nope.

Piercings: ears

Clothing Style: bougie most of the time

Usual Expression: pursed lips, scowl, something that says...I’m disappointed

Distinguishing Characteristics: her smile, when you get to see it

HEALTH

Physical Ailments: none.

Neurological Conditions: n/a

Allergies: none.

Sleeping Habits: she sleeps on her freaking back like HOW people do that, i’ll never know, but the gal does

Eating Habits: she’ll eat whatever ends up in front of her

Exercise Habits: she’s up every day at 4 or 5 am to do something physical

Emotional Stability: i don’t know her

Sociability: very skeptical of people, often judgemental, but she can be kind and hold a conversation at times; she’s used to people wanting to talk to her

Body Temperature: runs cold yet often wears outfits she’ll definitely be cold in

Addictions: none.

Drug Use: not really (still stress smokes sometimes it’s not great)

Alcohol Use: oh yes...oh yes. she’s that person that has a bottle of really nice scotch in her bottom desk drawer with two empty glasses.

PERSONALITY

Label: tbd

Positive Traits: cunning, protective, fierce, poised, skilled, brilliant

Negative Traits: egotistical, stubborn, judgmental, competitive, cold, closed-off

Fears: fears are for wimps

Hobbies: who has the time for hobbies

Habits: drinking, writing people off, holding grudges :)

FAVOURITES

Weather: give her a brisk day

Colour: any deep red

Music: something classic, on a record player preferably

Movies: old movies

Sport: tennis

Beverage: scotch, black coffee

Food: tbd

Animal: cats and only cats

FAMILY

Father: oscar white

Mother: lucille white

Sibling(s): annabelle white

Children: bella peterman

Exes: clifford hughes (ex-husband #1), daniel peterman (ex-husband #2), lilith baxter (on again, off again girlfriend)

Pet(s): prince the black cat

Family’s Financial Status: wealthy

EXTRA

Zodiac Sign: taurus

MBTI: entj

Anything Else:

BIO

tl;dr: abusive father, quiet mother, distant sister; two failed marriages; daughter who hates her; VERY accomplished surgeon (studying under Ellis Grey for a bit), then doing her own research; particularly influential in the field of minimally invasive and robotic surgeries (well-known award winner); fucked lilith

Celeste White was born to Oscar and Lucille White in Manchester, England. She was born a few years before her sister, Annabelle. The four lived in a large house, Celeste’s father being the beneficiary of her late grandfather’s successful business. Of course, Oscar couldn’t manage anything, let alone a successful company.

Their house was a cold place to grow up. (TW alcoholism, abuse) Celeste’s father was constantly drinking, and when he wasn’t drinking, he was screaming at someone to get him more to drink. Her mother was a quiet woman, constantly living under the thumb of her father. He was most definitely abusive, although he mostly kept that out of their eyes. But Celeste knew, and she grew to resent her mother for what she saw as weakness. Annabelle tried to pretend it wasn’t happening at all.

Celeste hated her father from a young age, always challenging him. He was a bastard (her words), and she let him know it. His reactions were often volatile. He wasn’t afraid to push around his kids, pull them by their hair, or hit them when provoked enough. And verbally he was a nightmare. He never paid it much mind after an altercation, but Celeste remembered everything. Especially how he would pit Celeste and Annabelle against each other. It prevented them from growing close as sisters.

Celeste left the family at age 17, heading to the University of Oxford to begin her education. It was there she completed a six-year medicine program, and then she continued on in London for a few years to perfect her craft. During her schooling, Celeste met Clifford. She was barely 19 years old when she agreed to marry him. (TW age difference, misogyny, abuse) Clifford was 31 when he married Celeste, and their initial romance quickly curtailed into a mess of a marriage. They fought constantly. He threw countless insults at her. His hatred of women became clear. Celeste was doing very well in her school, excelling in her medical studies, but Clifford was failing in his business ventures at every turn. He began to drink and became quite the son of a bitch (her words). Their marriage ended with both of them engaging in a volatile fight. She divorced him once her training was done, deciding to move to the states the first moment she could.

Celeste was 26 when she moved to the U.S., securing a job at Mass General Hospital. Celeste wasn’t overly crazy about the states, but she found working at the hospital to be enlightening. She started working under Ellis Grey. She was a hard woman to be around, but Celeste adamantly enjoyed learning from the other woman. She worked with her as she eventually won her a second Harper Avery award. Feeling inspired by the woman’s influence, Celeste began to engage in research of her own.

Celeste was 29 when she met Daniel Peterman. Daniel was a professor of medicine, and Celeste was enamored with his kindness and warmth. They were dating about 6 months when Celeste found out she was pregnant. She’d never wanted children. She even considered not having the child, but it turned out she was too far along to consider such choices.

Celeste had to halt her research to give birth to her daughter, Bella. Looking at the tiny baby in her arms, Celeste really did fall in love. Possibly for the first time ever. She and Daniel were married soon after.

Being in the U.S. soon became tiresome, so Daniel and Bella moved with Celeste back to London where she began to, once again, engage in her research. Celeste wrote numerous papers, many notable to her peers. She was becoming a very well-known surgeon, but her time away from Daniel and Bella was waring on them. Daniel would become more and more irritated that Celeste was more married to her work than him. He began to have numerous affairs outside of their marriage. To get back at him, Celeste did the same. Their marriage became more about the battle than their lives together. Bella was often caught in the middle of it all, but her Dad was more present in her life. Although Celeste tried, Bella began to openly favor Daniel.

Celeste and Daniel finally started their divorce proceedings when she was 39 years old. Bella was barely 10. Their divorce was bitter and angry. They fought over every scrap, including Bella. Celeste was able to maintain shared custody, but that wasn’t really the way it ended up playing out. Bella fought her at every turn, always wanting to go back to her father when she was with Celeste. For years they were at odds. Celeste loved Bella deeply, but she also loved her work. As Bella became a teenager, she eventually just stopped fighting and let Bella choose. Bella, of course, chose her father.

Celeste fell into her work, possibly producing even some of her best. She expanded her specialty to include minimally invasive and robotic surgeries. Celeste single-handedly changed the game with her research, becoming the face for minimally invasive techniques and robotics in surgery. When she was 45 years old, Celeste was awarded the Lister Medal by the Royal College of Surgeons of England (and countless other awards throughout her career).

She even tried her hand at teaching. Although she was not always the easiest person to learn from, Celeste found herself quite taken by Kassandra. They formed a bond during their time working together, and while she’d never fully admit it, Celeste enjoys mentoring the girl. One of her soft spots.

Celeste never had the desire to marry again, and she wasn’t concerned with love of any kind. Just loving. Her sexuality was something she always felt encouraged to explore. Although she’d only ever married men, there were women and other folks she’d had affairs with over the years. She much preferred women, if she was being honest.

Celeste met Lilith Baxter through her work and found the woman to be seductive and sensuous. They were on and off again, but Celeste quite enjoyed when they were on. They weren’t a perfect duo...two dominating personalities never were, but Celeste did think about Lilith. More often than she should.

It occurred to Celeste as she was turning 50 that she had accomplished a lot, but retirement was nowhere close to where she wanted to be. Upon hearing of the opening in Seattle, Celeste decided to once again venture to the states. She asked Bella to move with her, but her daughter ignored the offer. They barely speak these days, which breaks Celeste’s heart. Celeste has won a lot of awards, but she would love to secure the Harper Avery.

PLOTS

y’all know me open to anything

we love a mentee or research assistant, perhaps an enemy to loath, a connection from someone who used to work with her (either abroad or in the u.s. in the past), a connection with one of her ex-husbands, and of course sexy times

#traumaintro #if only hell didn't feel like home ( celeste white. )#hey #tw abuse #tw alcoholism #tw divorce #( character intro. )

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immaculate-benediction-batch · 5 years

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Sorry this is so long......How TV Creators Are Handling Subtext And Shipping

TV series creators have a hard time not tailoring content towards a strictly heteronormative audience, refusing to lean in to queer context, no matter howlarge an LGBTQ following a show may have.

Once a fictional character is put out for public consumption, it ceases to be the one thing it’s described as on paper. This is especially the case with TV and film, where said character goes through so many hands before hitting the screen and becoming public property.

There are three kinds of creators when it comes to queer content on TV. The first (and sadly, most typical) is the creator who will deny any intention of creating queer content, and who will also refuse to acknowledge a queer audience’s interpretation., This often results in an instant backlash, as the Supergirlcast and creators experienced after an embarrassing interview with MTV last summer. When prompted to recap the latest season, the cast broke into a cringeworthy song that mocked fans’ interest in the Supergirl/Lena Luthor pairing, with Jeremy Jordan repeatedly exclaiming that the two will never get together. It continued despite Katie McGrath’s attempt to save the interview saying, “The great thing about what we do is, like any art, anyone can read into it what they want.” Chris Wood then chimed in with “Sexuality is all about others’ perception of yours, right?”

Supergirl is a show with a large female following that from the beginning has gravitated toward the female relationships it portrays, with emphasis on those relationships with strong queer energy. At first, there was a group of internet fans that were drawn to the chemistry between Melissa Benoist and Calista Flockhart, which was maximized due to the characters’ intense mentor/mentee relationship, and that was fine, and for the most part went unacknowledged by the show.

However, upon Flockhart’s exit, Lena Luthor was introduced, played by Katie McGrath. Kara Danvers and Lena Luthor became fast friends, and fans’ fascination with Supergirl’s queer vibes grew strong enough for the the cast to take notice. One would think that by having Alex Danvers and Maggie Sawyer, two queer characters already in their orbit, fan speculation about others wouldn’t be such an inconvenience that it would have to be addressed by aggressively singing “They’re only friends!” over and over, as if the pairing were unfathomable.

But Supergirl hasn’t been the only show to outright reject queer interpretations. In fact, a few years back, the long-running series Supernatural was called out by its fans for purposefully inserting homoerotic subtext within storylines pertaining to male characters Dean and Castiel, and for rather indirectly addressing said subtext in interviews. In one of them, Misha Collins (Castiel) stated that in certain scenes with Jensen Ackles (Dean) he was directed to portray his character as a “jilted lover.”

During a Toronto Con panel in 2013, it was revealed that a line was changed by Ackles — who last year specifically requested no questions about the popular pairing be allowed during the Q portion of a panel for the show at New Jersey Con–from “I love you” to “We’re family. I need you” because the Actor didn’t think it suited his character. Despite fandom’s interest in the pairing, it hasn’t been enough for Supernaturalto follow through with an actual queer storyline, aside from the one recurring lesbian character, Charlie, who was ultimately killed off. It turns out our tolerance for queerbaiting does have its limits.

Another show that failed to address the sapphic energy between its leads, in effect rejecting a great opportunity to add a bonus layer to an already complex relationship between two women, was Damages. The thriller starred Glenn Close as powerhouse prosecutor Patty Hewes, and Rose Byrne as her protégée, Ellen Parsons. The series went on for five seasons and throughout, though it benefitted from incredible writing, its highlight was clearly the tension and undecipherable relationship between Patty and Ellen.

While there was never any doubt that their connection was what kept the the show’s palpable tension dial at a 10, anytime the subject was brought up to either cast or creators it was denied or waved off as “wishful thinking,” as Glenn Close put it. When pressed further, she added, “I think there’s something seductive about Patty and she just seduces people and she’ll lead people on. I think that can come across as pure seduction.”

With Person of Interest, Sameen Shaw (Sarah Shahi) and Root (Amy Acker) first connected under very unique, very dark circumstances in which one was holding the other against their will in a life threatening situation. But there was a sizzle there that the audience immediately responded to, and while both cast and writers admitted that was not their intention, something amazing happenedthey took that audience reaction and ran with it. In the end, Shaw and Root’s romance became one of the show’s more compelling storylines.

Jane the Virgin did the same. When a character, Petra, who wasn’t intentionally written as queer read queer to LGBTQ viewers, the writers saw no problem taking the interpretation and adopting it as canon. After years of keeping Petra as a sort of peripheral player within Jane/Rafael storylines, the character of Jane Ramos was introduced as Petra’s defense attorney and eventual love interest.

The third type of creator is everyone’s favorite. This is the one that takes whatever gay subtext or context there is, embraces it, and expands upon it, recognizing that it’s there from the beginning. In the Flesh and Killing Eve are true representatives of queer entertainment that isn’t trying to steer its characters toward a path they weren’t organically wanting to go.

In the Flesh, a BAFTA-award winning series from BBC 3, was easily one of the best shows that no one watched; a zombie show with depth, which isn’t easy to accomplish. The story takes place years after a virus epidemic that turned the infected into flesh-eating monsters is cured, and the rehabilitated are returning home. Its main character is Luke, one of the former infected, suffering from memories of the terrible things he did while sick, and tortured by his own suicide, which was prompted by the loss of love interest, Rick.

The series ran for only two seasons, with a total of nine episodes. It was inventive and creative and stands as one of the greats right next to shows like Hannibal and The Exorcist, which was unfortunately canceled by Fox this year after only two seasons of sacrilege, beautiful cinematography, Alfonso Herrera (Sense8) and a bisexual Father Marcus, played by Ben Daniels.

Killing Eve is a female-led thriller that proves that the secret to making great TV is treating characters like human beings with the capacity to change. Eve, who, when we meet her, is living a life that doesn’t seem particularly terrible, whose marriage appears to be solid, her job secure, is lured into potentially life threatening situations for the sake of following her inexplicable attraction to a female assassin. As if beneath the surface there is a dormant unrest that is awakened with the arrival of Villanelle in her life, and though she does not stop to examine exactly what she expects to get from it, she craves and wants more of these moments that have stirred her awake. She’s both excited and frightened by Villanelle’s audaciousness, by the intrusion into her life,

both figuratively and literally.

The season’s got a few episodes left, yet the most compelling, and most attentively queer moment is part of the fifth episode, in which the two women finally come face to face in Eve’s home. Eve is sopping wet in a gorgeous dress Villanelle’s purchased for her, she’s cold and visibly uncomfortable, therefore Villanelle suggests Eve should change, before proceeding to peel the dress off her herself. It is a scene that doesn’t downplay the very real danger Eve is in by having Villanelle in her home. However there is also an erotic aspect to it that is very purposeful, and as series creator Phoebe Waller-Bridge points out, the attraction is definitely mutual, “I knew that the first moment they see each other. I labeled that moment as ‘love at first sight.’ But I didn’t want it to be constrained to romance, or to lust, or anything like that. There’s something waking in Eve every day that she spends imagining what this woman is doing.”

This type of storytelling allows characters to evolve the way that they want to evolve as opposed to forcing them into a first page description. There is loyalty to the authenticity of the story, which comes from meticulous attention paid to the writing, which Waller-Green explains is all about going against cliché: “The moment something feels predictable, there’s a roar in me to just go to the most surprising place. I don’t want to bore myself.”

Often times, when female queer characters are introduced, it is done in order to titillate, and their storylines are the product of a male gaze fantasy. Killing Eve manages to avoid all of that with Villanelle, a character who seems to have no specific preference when it comes to sexual partners, and yet doesn’t feel the need to use her sexuality to get what she wants. In addition to that and the meaty tension between the two leads (Villanelle and the titular Eve, played by Sandra Oh), the attention paid to the very queer theme of the show is evident in backstories of characters that would normally go without one, like that of Eve’s former boss and best friend Bill, an older man in a heterosexual relationship who casually reveals he’s loved “hundreds” of men, much to Eve’s surprise, and further reveals he is in an open relationship, and happily so.

The series proves not only that queer characters are marketablethe BBC series was renewed for a second season before the first even airedbut that straight creators are capable of writing queer content that isn’t offensive or over-sexualized. Phoebe Waller-Bridge credits the authenticity of the series to a collaborative effort, stating, “Because it’s all about the characters, the little details that link the two worlds, everyone’s really made it a psychological piece rather than just an artistic painting of two different people’s worlds,” but it really just goes to show that that negative aspects of queer representation that include the dreaded male gaze perspective can be avoided as long as the bar is set high enough by the showrunner.

It only takes a little bit of creativity and imagination, and a willingness to challenge the idea that heterosexual-based television makes for the best and most successful stories.

Alex Velazquez is a writer, photographer, and queer Mexican living in Los Angeles, CA.

#sherlock #killing eve #supernatural #supergirl #queerbaiting #shipping #lgbt #in the flesh #jane the virgin #person of interest

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im-the-king-of-the-ocean · 4 years

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Any fav LGBT headcanons for RWBY?

I really like the idea of Ruby being demisexual (but also sapphic learning)

Nora has been trans to me since her new outfit and everyone noticed she has the trans pride colors

Both Blake and Yang being bisexual (when they find out they both are at Beacon, they bond over it)

Weiss eventually figures out she’s aromantic, and her relationships with the other members of Team RWBY are queerplatonic (everyone knows this and is okay with it)

I love the idea of one of the maidens being a trans girl (there’s a part of me that wants to hold out for the Summer Maiden, but realistically I know it probably won’t happen in canon - aus are the best anyhow)

Qrow is polyamorous (and attracted to pretty much any gender, if he’d choose a label it would probably be pan, but he’s not interested in labeling anything).

I don’t know the ship name for it, but I kinda started shipping Ilia/Emerald earlier (they’re both coming from very toxic places where they’re angry at the world, but want genuine love. I feel like they could help each other heal a lot).

Just now, I decided Jaune is totally a trans boy with anxiety over being “just another one of the Arc girls” partially fueling his desire to leave home. Also why he cut his longer hair. He wanted to be more masculine.

Winter is a closeted lesbian. She’s known for years, but has kept the truth held tightly under lock and key. All throughout her time at Atlas Academy she had a massive crush on Robyn Hill and hated Robyn for it. Later she and Robyn get together.

I could probably go on forever, but I’m gonna stop there for now

#rwby #i came up with a few of these just now #but yeah #i enjoy my characters being queer thank you

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citkats · 3 years

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Love, Victor and it's problems

Hello! First post here! I know this isn't a movie, instead of a show, but I feel like I have a few things I have the urge to spill out, so here it goes.

I've watched both seasons of Love, Victor and finished the second one the day it came out, June 11. It's now June, 26 and I've let a few thoughts and problems I've had about the show sit in my brain for a while now but they're starting to get antsy. Is the show really that serious to pick it apart and point out its flaws? No, it's supposed to be a cute little show about a boy exploring his sexuality, and I know that. But man I can't help myself, what else am I suppose to do this summer anyway? So, that being said, let's get started!

Actually, before I start I just wanted to get out of the way that I am a queer girl myself, who is also a teenager, so that is the type of viewpoint I am watching this show through. Do with that what you will :D Now we can get started, here are the three main problems I had with the show;

i. The Writing

The writing of this show is... something else to say the least. It has its good moments for sure, but man is it hard to get through an episode without cringing once or twice. Now I am no writer myself, so I can't judge too hard, but I wish the show didn't try to fit in so many pop culture references and twitter lingo to try and appeal to teens. It's so obvious while watching that the writers themselves only have a vague idea on how to use it. There is a scene of the show that is going around on twitter, instagram and tiktok where a character says something along the lines of "We stan you!" and "We're all gay AF!" (link below for the whole video).

.... like... what? My god my body collapsed in on itself when I heard that. I think the writers maybe tried to make the line of "We're gay AF" as a cringy joke to show how oblivious the character was, but the line "We will forever stan you" shows how oblivious the writers are to the use of the word "stan", or at least that's how it came off the way the actor said it. The line is said with no implication that it's supposed to be cringy or something to laugh at. I don't know if the writers were aware at the time that this is something teenagers do not say about or to their friends unless they purposely want to sound out of touch. Someone in the replies even said "In real life that won't happen ever" and they're correct. This is just one instance where the writing feels shaky but there are many more sprinkled throughout the show. This probably is super nitpicky but it's just so prevalent in the show that I felt that I had to write about it.

ii. The Love Interests

Now on to another problem, The characters of Rahim & Benji. Let's start off with Benji. He serves as the love interest for the main character Victor, which is fine! It's great! Except it isn't because that's all Benji is... a love interest. He barely has any personality and the only three things I know about him are that he is gay, is in a band, and is a recovering alcoholic. With those three things, there is so much to do with his character. They mention in the show that his dad wasn't too happy when he came out, and brought him to a strip club in order to make him "straight". I thought maybe the show would show how his relationship with his dad has been damaged and how they're slowly trying to repair it, or maybe Benji doesn't want to forgive his dad and all! But no, the restaurant scene comes and everything seems fine like something as traumatic as your own father refusing to accept your sexuality and trying to convince you to be someone else never happened. If you're going to make your character go through something like that, it would be good to show its consequences, not to sweep it under the rug! In the first half of the season, if I remember correctly, we see almost every character in a different location doing their own storyline, except Benji, who only exists at school and in the coffee shop to show that he's Victor's boyfriend. I don't think there's a single scene where it's just Benji alone doing something that doesn't involve Victor. It isn't until the later episodes where he gets his own plotline, one that revolves around him being a recovering alcoholic and being 1 year sober. Now don't even get me started on this... the fact they waited a whole season and a half to get to this huge revelation?? This is a big part of Benji that he kept secret and they could do so much with it, but it ends up being just a plot device so that Victor can break up with him and end the season on a cliffhanger. It seems like every one of Benji's plot points is to benefit Victor in some way (all except for the band, but they also never expand on that either so :/). The other couples, for example, Lake & Felix, have their own problems and stuff they're going through, not just things to benefit their love interest story. I get that Victor is the main character, but if this show is about him discovering his sexuality, should his love interest be a huge part of that? Shouldn't there be more focused on his love interest rather on his best friend? I don't know that's just how I view it.

Rahim is Victor's second love interest who is introduced halfway through the second season in the episode called Sincerely Rahim. He, like Benji, the only purpose of his character is to serve as a love interest for Victor and create a love triangle that can end season 2 on a cliffhanger, just like season 1 did. The show cared even less about Rahim than they cared about Benji since they didn't even bother to show his coming-out scene. It sucks because he comes from a Muslim family and that coming out scene could've been really meaningful, for once showing a Muslim family being accepting of a gay son instead of shunning them, which is how the media normally portrays Muslim families.

iii. The couple bias

Probably my biggest problem with this show is the clear bias to the straight couples compared to the main gay couple of the show. Like I said before, Benji being a shell of a character compared to everyone else, I don't think that's a coincidence. I am aware that there was at least one gay writer on the team, but they didn't seem to make up the majority. It's obvious the writers felt more comfortable writing straight characters and couples (eg, Victor and Mia as a couple for the majority of season one) which is fine, but if you're writing a show with a gay couple in it then get gay writers who will actually understand and have an easier more natural approach to them. This is why I think diversity in the writer's room is just as important as diversity on screen. You can put a gay character in your show but if they're written by a straight person it's not going to feel authentic and can easily fall into stereotypes. But that's a conversation for another time.

Some other small problems I had but weren't worth a whole section

-The lack of sapphic women. I think they might start a wlw plotline the next season with Lake but man.. took them two seasons in a show that's suppose to be a representation to even hint at a sapphic relationship.

-Benji's timeline for his alcoholism... if he's 16 now (junior) and been sober for a year... that means he entered rehab when he was 15... which means he's been drinking heavily since he was like 14, so much so they had to put him in rehab?? Are his parents really that neglectful? This why I am so confused about his parents because what his dad did to him was awful and yet when they show Benji's parents, his mother seems to adore him and they are both extremely welcoming to Victor. The only reason I see why he would start drinking at such a young age is that he felt bad because of his sexuality... but man, at 14 do you even understand what's going on enough to be like "this is bad I should drown my sorrows in booze".... idk such a strange timeline.

-They didn't keep up Rahim's texts to Victor, it was one and done. I get that it was supposed to be like continuity with what Simon did to Bram and then what Victor did to Simon but it felt so forced that I wish they didn't do it at all. Felt like they just left it hanging there.... ok I will admit it is really nitpicky and I'll stop now I promise!

So... that's it! I know this can come off as annoying or I'm giving huge pessimist vibes because of this but I swear me having long rants about how I feel about a show's problems is rare. Normally I like deconstructing the parts I did like rather than the parts I didn't. I do think this show is cute and serves its purpose of entertaining, and I don't hold anything against someone who enjoys it! I can easily see this being someone's comfort show, and that's completely fine. I also realize that I did dig into the writers quite a lot here, so I just want to make it clear that in no way am I questioning their talent (one is a new york times bestseller and two others have been nominated for Emmys). Hopefully, my posts in the future will be more positive but for now, I hope this deconstruction was decent!

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blueboxesandtrafficcones · 6 years

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The One With All the Candles

Day 12 of 31 Days of Ficmas! @doctorroseprompts

So, a note about today’s story. This is about Rose coming to terms with 13′s regeneration into a woman. Throughout, there are questions and confusion about things like pronouns and semantics. Obviously this is a hot-button issue, especially given that we’ve never heard Jodie’s Doctor refer to themself. As two lovelies will tell you, I’ve been fretting about this since last night, and basically - I tried to be as respectful and considerate of the issue as I could, while still raising what I consider to be valid questions (though I don’t try to answer them). I sincerely hope you enjoy, and mean no offence.

@timepetalsprompts bingo - Piper, sapphic characters; all Doctor’s in love with Rose

Ficmas Masterlist 2017, Day 12

AO3

Cameo from Sarah Jane!

“I’m just so mad,” Rose burst out, looking up from her tea. “How could he think that? I mean, really! Do you know we’ve been married a thousand years? Literally a thousand! Not an exaggeration, an actual count! Well, it’s a bit more than that honestly, but the point stands! After a thousand years, he thinks- gah!”

“I know, dear, he’s an idiot,” Sarah Jane patted her hand kindly. “This can’t be a surprise.”

Rose sighed. “Look, I admit it threw me a little – but this is a major change. I just needed some time to wrap my head around it. I’m not rejecting him, I just – I needed to process, you know? But Mr. Overreaction dumps me here and runs off! Bloody idiot.”

“How do you really feel about it? Honestly.”

“I’m getting used to the idea. And he’s gorgeous, but still – it’s the Doctor. At the end of the day, that’s my husband, my soulmate. I accept everything about him. Some things just take a little to wrap your mind around. Like last time, those eyebrows? After him not having any for centuries? That was weird. Two hours to process something like this is not unreasonable.”

“It’s a big difference,” Sarah Jane agreed, “and I think you’re taking it well. But you know him, for as smart as he is he’s a bit thick.”

“Yeah,” Rose sighed again. “My biggest – whatever – is just… how much does this change? I mean, linguistically. Do I still call him my husband? Or even call him ‘he’? Are we going to have problems when we visit the past?” She glanced up at her friend, blushing as she admitted, “I’ve never been with a woman before.”

“Well, I’m definitely not commenting on what happens in your bedroom. But as for all of it, I would just say – talk to the Doctor. Let, er, them tell you want they want. This is a change of the physical appearance, not of the person inside. You have to work it out between you. Remember, this is as much a change for him – her – the Doctor as it is for you. You’ll figure it out.”

Rose banged her head against Sarah Jane’s kitchen table. “If I tell you something swear you’ll never tell?”

“Promise,” Sarah Jane hid her smile behind her tea mug.

“The part I hate the most is he’s – she? – is so much prettier than I am.”

The ostensibly older woman burst into laughter, smiling over Rose’s shoulder as the Doctor walked in. “Hi, there.”

“Hello, Sarah,” the Doctor replied, coming to stand by Rose. “Hello, love.”

“Hi,” Rose tilted her head up, automatically accepting her husband’s kiss. It was their first since he regenerated so the Doctor kept his touch light, pulling back far sooner than normal. He was surprised when Rose pulled him back in for a deeper kiss.

“Hi,” he repeated, and Rose’s eyes fluttered open.

“Your lips are… really soft,” she breathed, biting her bottom lip.

“That all right?”

“Oh, yeah,” she smiled up at him. “We’re gonna be just fine.”

“Good,” the Doctor sighed in relief. “Well, I hate to pull you away from Sarah, but I was hoping we might talk?”

Rose nodded, captivated by the way she could see her husband’s thoughts and feelings on his face, as well as across the bond.

After giving Sarah a quick hug goodbye, the couple strolled hand in hand to the TARDIS.

“I’m sorry I left you here and ran away,” the Doctor muttered as they neared the doors.

“S’all right. I know this is a big change for both of us – talking to Sarah Jane helped, a bit. I just had to work it out for myself.”

“And how do you feel?” The Time Lord’s anxious eyes peered into Rose’s, at the same height for the first time in their relationship.

“It’s different,” she admitted freely, “but it’s still you, and I’m still me. And I love you, no matter what the casing looks like, remember?”

“Good,” the Doctor smiled for the first time, and the sight took Rose’s breath away.

“Bloody hell, you’re gorgeous,” she muttered, making her spouse laugh freely.

“As are you, my love.”

“Are we good?” Rose abruptly sobered. “Because this doesn’t change my feelings for you, not really. It’s just a matter of updating my perspective is all.”

“We’re good,” the Doctor confirmed, leading Rose into the ship and through the console room. “But, I still want to talk to you.”

“Sure,” she smiled. “Library?”

“Bedroom, if that’s all right.”

“Course,” Rose agreed easily, walking through the doorway first only to stop dead.

There must have been a thousand candles filling the space, set on every possible surface including the floor.

“What?” She gasped, spinning to face the Doctor.

“Go on,” he encouraged, nudging her inside.

“It’s beautiful,” she murmured, moving to what appeared to be a clearing on the floor.

The Doctor joined her, guiding her to a specific spot before standing in front of her, uncharacteristically nervous. Well, uncharacteristically for his last regeneration – Rose had no idea what would be their new normal, but found she was excited to find out.

“Rose,” he began, fidgeting nervously as he took her hands in his own, “I love you. I’ve loved you almost since the moment I took your hand and told you to run. We’ve been running ever since, and it’s been the most incredible, wonderful, amazing millennia of my lives.”

He paused, and Rose rushed to speak. “Mine too.”

The Doctor smiled widely, that same wide grin that sent a spark of desire through Rose’s body. “Brilliant. And like I said, I know this has been a lot of – of change, and things may be different going forward, and we’ll have to adjust, but-” He had to take a moment to blink away his tears. “But I want to figure this out with you.”

Stepping back slightly, he sank to one knee in front of her as Rose gasped, one hand flying up to cover her mouth.

“Rose Tyler, how long are you going to stay with me?”

“Forever,” she whispered, half laughing in disbelief. She repeated the word, stronger this time, smiling widely. The Doctor rose, and they stepped together into a tight hug.

Rose buried her face in the Doctor’s neck, trying to contain her giggles.

“What?”

She began to shake from the losing battle to keep them in.

“Rose, what?”

“It’s just so weird!” She cried, looking up at him. “We’re the same height, and you smell so nice, and I so did not expect to like the way our breasts smush together so much, and I can’t believe this is my life and I just love you so much!”

“I love you too,” the Doctor grinned at her rambling speech. “Now you see why I always liked hugging you.”

“We’re gonna be okay,” she smiled. “It’s gonna take time to figure this out, and what you want, but it’s gonna be okay. More than, really.”

“Course it is,” the Doctor replied confidently. “The Doctor and Rose Tyler, in the TARDIS. That’s all we need – hang the rest.”

Rose kissed him, still smiling.

“You realize there’s a lot we’re going to have to decide on, right?”

He shrugged. “We’ll figure it out.”

“Yes, we will.”

They kissed again, before Rose pulled back to look around.

“What’s with all the candles? There’s like a thousand.”

“One thousand sixteen, actually.”

“Really? A candle for every year we’ve been married?”

The Doctor grimaced. “It started because I was watching FRIENDS while waiting for you, then kind of snowballed.”

“‘The One With the Proposal?’”

“What else?”

“Oh, Doctor.”

#bbatcfic #doctorroseprompts #timepetalscollective #ficandchips #31 Days of Ficmas #13xrose #sarah jane #Doctor Who #the one with all the candles #31 Days of Ficmas 2017

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gettin-bi-bi-bi · 7 years

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“I hope this is not too long I’ll try to condense as much as possible so it makes sense. It all started about a year ago I started using tinder again I did use it previously but deleted because it was kind of boring and I was busy anyway so I had no time to really date. Anyways, this second time around I did what I usually do and set my preferences to men because well that’s what I liked and always have. I’ve always was attracted to the opposite sex. I guess up until now. One day I was on tinder and just decided “Let’s see what some girls are up to” and switched my preferences. There were so many pretty girls, but that’s all I thought, they were pretty I could really see me being friends with them. I kept swiping and came across a girl who I knew and saw every day because she worked at a café I always went to. She would always start some type of conversation with me or anything and was a really nice girl, but I never thought anything more. I swiped right on her and she messaged me. She was really kind and sweet and asked me to go out with her for ice cream. I said yes but I couldn’t do it because of work. We would keep talking throughout that summer but I put her off which I don’t know why I did but I did, I mean we did live like 45 min away but I don’t know. At this time, I was also starting to date guys who were great but I never kept anything with them at all. All I did was go on dates and that’s it, it was kind of bland but I did enjoy them but it never lasted. I got back to college that August and that girl who worked at the café who also went to the same school as me asked me if I wanted to go for ice cream since now it was way easier to just go (Like I said we lived about 45 min away so now since we are in school it obviously easier to hang) we went out for ice cream and it was great, best date I ever had with anyone. We really connected and had a lot of the same interest. We would hang with each other and go to her apartment and she would come to mine. Long story short one night she wanted to kiss me and I let her, and I liked it and she started getting touchy on my arm and I liked it but I kind of pulled back because I felt like things were going to escalate and I wasn’t ready. She graduated so she’s gone but It’s nearly I year since our first official encounter other than just seeing her at her job and I’m on tinder again since I’m at home and there is nothing to do and I see myself swiping for girls. Here’s where and why I’m confused, up until this point in my life, before me and her and our kiss, I always thought of myself as straight, I never had a crush on a girl not even after all that happened never had one. I have more heterosexual thoughts about sex than homosexual. At the same token, I can see myself in a relationship with a girl. And my whole life, I never was grossed out with the thought of kissing a girl I was fine if it ever happened or if a girl wanted to, but I never swayed to girls. I still don’t see women like I see men in a sexual manner, but I see women as if I could have a more beneficial relationship, a mental, emotional connection with them more than a man, but I’m more sexually attracted to men. I’m so confused what do I do? Am I bi? I try not to get caught up with labels but I want to know.”

Okay... let me try to reply to this in order or in a sensible way.

The fact that you pulled back when this girl got “too touchy” sounds like something completely normal. As you said, you weren’t ready for more intimacy at that point and that’s fine. It doesn’t invalidate the feelings you had/have for her. My question would be tho if you told her that? Did you tell her you’ve never dated a women or had sex with a woman before and that’s why you’d like to take things slowly? She may not have known how to interprete your behaviour. What I’m saying is: I don’t think all is lost there if you still want to be with her. If you are being honest with her and tell her your thoughts, feelings, fear then I’m sure she’ll understand and maybe you can date again.

Now, about your actual questions. I can’t tell you what your sexuality is. You have to find that out by yourself. Anyway, from the way you describe it, it totally sounds like you could be bi. Basically, if you feel like “bisexual” is a label that fits you, then you can own it! My favourite definition of bisexuality is “the potential to be sexually and/or romantically attracted to people of two or more genders”. This attraction doesn’t have to feel exactly the same for all genders and you don’t have to feel it all at the same time or in the same intensity. You may have a fixed preference for men or maybe you go through phases. There are as many different way of being bisexual as there are bi people. But if it helps: I felt a lot like you did for a while in the sense that I also had very immediate and explicit sexual thoughts about men that I liked whereas when I liked a girl it was more sensual/romantic. One of the reasons for this could be that there just isn’t much media representation for sapphic love. There’s either porn which isn’t very realistic or as good as nothing. And in a heteronormative society you simply don’t “learn” how to be attracted to women. But even when we take this aspect out of the equation: attractions are allowed to feel differently without invalidating bisexuality.

I hope this helped.

Maddie

#bisexuality #bi help #bi advice #bisexual help #bisexual advice

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mostlydonts-blog1 · 7 years

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First Encounter

(Dicks? Those won’t do.)

My first job I somehow managed to land a Sales Associate position at Spencer's Gifts. If you don't know what that is, who are you? No, but really, it's just this gag gift and merchandise retailer. They have some pretty cool stuff in there, some pretty funny stuff, and some pretty naughty stuff. To this day, I'm 100% certain the only reason I was hired was because I had purple hair at the time. I knew this guy who had ten times the experience I did, and they picked me over him.

So what did a little baby gay(still riding the bi-denial train) like me do at a store like that? I folded a lot of shirts, to be honest. They liked to keep me up in the front corner by the entrance, just folding shirts all fucking day. It was killer on the back; I am NOT a short girl and the table I had to use was for people below the five and a half feet marker. Still, I did my job, and I did it well, so eventually, they had me stocking all over the store, helping customers, and hovering around the cash till. Well, they didn't have me hovering, I chose to hover, mostly because of Blondie. (Forgive the codename, I didn't know her well enough to think of a better one)

Blondie was the first crush I had on a girl that I whole-heartedly accepted (I'd had a serious one on another girl in high school, back in my severe denial days, when I tried to tell myself I was straight. I may have accidentally fallen a little bit in love with her, in fact, but we don't talk about those days). She had a couple piercings and wore enough band tees to impart a badass vibe, but was super nice, and laughed at the jokes I stuttered out around her.

Mostly I avoided her while simultaneously trying to be around her as much as possible. Some of you are confused right now and some of you know EXACTLY what I mean. To those that are confused, think of a steaming plate of your favourite food. You know you should stop, you shouldn't take a bite because you're going to burn yourself, but you CAN'T. You're cursing like a sailor while you blister the inside of your mouth all because you have NO self-control. It's shameful, really. So I'd slink up to her, ask about her weekend, and then sprint away as soon as she was done answering before she could get a single question of her own out.

Spencer's was the setting for many of my first encounters. The two most important being my first encounter with a crush as a gay chick, and my first encounter with ANOTHER gay chick. The second was very short lived, took my breath away, and left me reeling. I don't live in a small town, or a small city I should say, but the gay community feels minuscule. To give you an idea, I didn't encounter my first lesbian until I was eighteen.

I didn't even realize at the moment. She and a couple friends came in, all happy smiles and boisterous laughter, and I recognized something in them, but I couldn't put my finger on it. Something that was familiar and foreign. (I can't say my gaydar has improved over the years, unfortunately.) They looked around for a while, meandered, pointed out some of the naughty stuff and laughed to each other, but ultimately didn't bring anything to the register. So being the antisocial, awkward Sales Associate that I was, I shuffled over and pretended to straighten the shelves until they asked for help.

A lesbian bachelorette party and they needed supplies.

I'd LIKE to say I hopped to, grabbing their hands and eagerly dragging them to the magical HALL OF LESBIAN BONANZAS where all of your sapphic dreams are made a reality. In reality, I stood stock-still other than my head tilting to the side just a bit, blinking back at them blankly. My body kept on existing in the real world but my mind had been shot out of a cannon and up into those rainbow clouds of joy in the sky.

"Hello? Damn it, Shannon, I think you broke her. Hey, kid, are you okay?"

"Never been asked about lesbian bachelorette parties before?"

"Her nails aren't that short by accident-"

"Shannon!"

Admittedly, I didn't really get the nail thing at the time, but Shannon's friend barking out her name in alarm did startle me out of my so-that's-what-they-look-like trance. I pointed somewhere off behind them and muttered that it was our limited bachelorette party section. I swear to god, by this point Shannon was TRYING to break me, or maybe loosen me up. Perhaps it was concern over my suddenly robotic limb movements, or that my face was redder than the ripest tomato ever grown, or even the sharp and jerky breaths I was taking. Whatever the case, Shannon could not just leave me be.

"Dicks? Nah, those won't do. Know what I'm saying, kiddo?" Wink.

Adrenaline and embarrassment flooded my system, and with Blondie approaching in my peripherals, my entire brain was screaming ABORT at me. Thoroughly shook, I stammered out some kind of apology, tripped backwards into the shelf and made it rain dozens and dozens of weed-themed candies down on me. "Yeah, no, yeah, hah, probably not your first choice, no, okay, so goodbye!"

Shannon, bless her heart, cackled all throughout my mad dash away to hide in the back storage.

DO'S AND DON'T'S: this is a little more straight-forward. Hah. Get it? STRAIGHT-forward? Anyway, yeah, so DON'T put on your dunce cap when meeting lesbians for the first time. DO realize that they are just regular people who probably don't appreciate being stared at like the eighth wonder of the world, and talk to them. Have a conversation, broaden your mind and inflate your knowledge. You're going to have to talk to them at some point otherwise, your lesbian experience is gonna be a lonely one.

#spencers #gay #damn it shannon #where's my hall of lesbian bonanzas???#lesbian

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