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pedroscurls · 1 year

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Title: The Teacher (Part 4).

CHAPTER TITLE: Flashbacks

Character(s): Joel Miller, Reader (female, first person POV) Summary: Your relationship with Joel develops. Word Count: 5,240 Author's Note: So, we’re definitely gonna dive a bit more deeper into the Reader’s history after the outbreak, so please be wary! Warnings are listed below. We’re in for an angsty chapter, but I promise it ends on a good note. (btw, this chapter definitely got way too ahead of me lol, enjoy) Warning: Mention of implied rape, killing, violence

Maria had visited you the following day. While Joel brought you comfort, so did Maria. You wondered if it was because she saved your life; though, she had always been so welcoming and understanding since the moment you met her. She never put any unnecessary pressure on you to open up or discuss things you weren’t ready to talk about.

“So,” she began with a smile. “You and Joel seem to hit it off.”

You blushed instantly, trying to hide your feelings for the man. “He’s nice,” was all you said.

“Just nice?” Maria chuckled.

“He’s becoming a good friend,” you smiled.

Maria gave you a knowing look, her head tilting in amusement. “Well, you must be really special.”

“Why’s that?”

“Joel just doesn’t normally like to make friends,” Maria admitted. “It’s like he’s a different man when you’re around though. I mean, I’ve never seen him smile or laugh this much and I’ve known the man for years.”

You blush deepened and you shrugged a shoulder. “That’s a good thing, right?”

Maria nodded with a smile. “Oh my god, are you kidding? It’s the greatest thing. He’s less of a grouch.”

You laughed to yourself as your mind drifted to Joel. You had only been at Jackson for a couple of days and already, you had developed a crush on your next door neighbor.

“Well, I suppose I should say you’re welcome,” you teased.

Maria laughed at that, leaning back against the couch. “Aside from that, how are you doing?”

You cleared your throat, dropping your eyes for a moment. “Doing okay.”

“You sure?”

“I just–” You sighed. “I’m still getting used to everything. You and your father built this amazing place and don’t get me wrong, I’m so grateful, but it’s just– It’s a lot.”

“That’s understandable,” Maria replied. “Everyone has their own process… You had been out there by yourself for a while so being here, in a place like Jackson, it can be overwhelming.”

You nodded in agreement. “I’m grateful, Maria. I am–”

She gave you a small smile. “Move at your own pace. Trust me, we want you to be comfortable here and we want you to feel safe. So, however long that takes, so be it. Just– Don’t rush it.”

You sighed, glancing over at her. You could see the genuine look on her face; her eyes were soft, displaying an emotion of empathy, and you felt a weight being lifted off your shoulders. “Thank you, Maria. I think once I start teaching, Jackson will start to feel like home.”

Maria nodded, “With that being said, I wanted to give you some updates.”

Your interest piqued and you listened intently. “Oh?”

“We’re building the classrooms right now and we’re deciding to put it in the middle of the community. There are plenty of parents who work around that general area, so it seemed like the best place to have the school,” Maria began. “We’re also going to have a meeting with the families next week so that they can meet you, you can meet them, and you can also meet the kiddos.”

You grinned as your mind drifted to the upcoming week. You figured that once you started meeting the kids and started teaching that you wouldn’t be so on edge; you hoped that Jackson would at least start feeling like a place where you could finally start living again.

“I’m excited,” you replied. “I really can’t wait.”

“How do you feel about coming with me to the bar tonight?” Maria asked. “No pressure though.”

“Maybe for one drink.”

She grinned. “Great. I’ll see you tonight.”

—

Later that night, you walked into the bar and noticed Maria immediately. You were wearing your boots with white fitted shirt tucked in with your light washed jeans and a flannel on top. She handed you a beer as you sat on a stool near the counter, looking around with a smile.

It was cozy. There were string lights hanging from the ceiling, music filtering through the room, but you noticed how warm and welcoming it felt. Plenty of people had come up to introduce themselves, even meeting some of the parents and expressing their excitement for the school opening up. It started to feel like you were part of this community and you felt all anxiety and worries disappear when you started to get more comfortable.

“Having fun?” Maria asked, leaning against the counter of the bar as she noticed you were halfway finished with your beer.

“Surprisingly, yeah,” you smiled. “Thank you for inviting me out.”

“Anytime,” she grinned, pointing towards your beer. “Want another one?”

You shook your head. “One’s enough, thank you.”

Maria nodded and then grabbed your hand, motioning towards the dance floor. “You dance?”

“It’s been a while,” you replied, following her eagerly. “I might make a fool out of myself.”

Maria laughed and kept a hold of your hand. “Don’t we all?”

“Fair point.” When she released your hand, you let your body sway to the music. The effects of the alcohol were burning through your veins, allowing you to fully calm down and just embrace the moment. Just a couple of days ago, you were so sure that you were going to die, but then Maria saved you and here you were, feeling surprisingly content and happy.

“You can dance!” She exclaimed, her arms raising in the air as she danced to the music as well.

You smiled, downing the rest of your beer and setting it on the counter. Returning to the dance floor, you shut your eyes and continued to sway, moving your hips rhythmically to the beat of the song.

Tommy and Joel had walked into the bar with a groan. Their patrol was easy, but tiring. There were no signs of any Infected or any threats, so it was a good day. When they entered the building though, both men were surprised to see a crowd forming in the middle of the dance floor.

“That’s new,” Tommy said, ordering two beers.

“Hm,” Joel said. “I’m only havin’ one beer and then I’m callin’ it a night. My back hurts.”

Tommy laughed to himself, handing his older brother a beer and shaking his head. “Alright, old man. One beer, that’s all.”

Joel shut his eyes for a moment, taking a long swig of his beer as he felt himself slowly relax. Though, when he heard Tommy gasp, Joel opened his eyes to look over at his brother.

“What?”

“Look,” Tommy said, pointing to the dance floor.

Joel turned his attention to the dance floor, his eyes immediately finding you. Though, his eyes drifted to the rest of your body, watching your hips move expertly to the song that was playing in the room. He grabbed his beer and took another long swig as he forced himself to look away.

“Looks like she’s havin’ fun,” Tommy smiled. “And she’s havin’ fun with my girl.”

Joel just nodded.

“Joel,” Tommy said, nudging his brother.

“I should get goin’,” Joel said, eyes flickering over to you.

“Oh, come on. You know you don’t wanna leave.”

“Well, she’s havin’ fun and I don’t wanna–”

Tommy shook his head, calling out Maria’s name. You looked over at the sound of Tommy’s voice and immediately noticed Joel. Your cheeks had turned red and you removed your flannel once it had gotten a bit too warm. You were smiling though, following Maria to Tommy and Joel. Your eyes though hadn’t left the older man’s; once more, it felt like everyone else in the room had disappeared and the only person you saw was him.

Joel.

“Hey baby. How was the patrol?” Maria asked, kissing Tommy’s cheek.

Tommy wrapped his arm around Maria, holding her close. “Was fine,” he said. “Nothing too out of the ordinary.”

Joel didn’t reply. He kept his eyes on you once you were now standing near him. He wanted nothing more than just to sweep you off your feet and take you back home, but he couldn’t. He shouldn’t.

“Wanna dance?” Maria asked Tommy, giving her husband a look to signal that they should give you and Joel some space.

“With you? Always. I’ll see you later Joel.” Tommy then turned to you and winked. “Nice moves you got there.”

You blushed, looking over at the younger brother. “It’s no longer a secret.”

Maria chuckled. “Now I’m wondering what else you got hiding.”

You laughed, shaking your head as the couple moved to the dance floor. Turning your attention back to Joel, you noticed how he was avoiding your eyes, sipping at his beer.

“Um,” you started. “I’m glad you’re home safe.”

“Me too.” Joel replied. “How are you?”

“Feeling really good,” you smiled. “Though, that may be the alcohol.”

“How much have you had to drink?”

“Just one beer,” you blushed. “I’m a lightweight.”

Joel chuckled. “Well, good to know. It’s good to see you havin’ fun.”

You nodded. “All thanks to Maria. She invited me out tonight.”

“That’s good,” Joel said, finishing his beer. He cleared his throat and motioned towards the door. “Well, have a good night.”

You furrowed your brow, pulling your flannel back on. “Wait, what?”

“I told Tommy I was just havin’ one drink and then I’m headin’ home.”

You bit your lower lip anxiously. “Would you be surprised if I told you that I told Maria the same thing?”

Joel’s eyes widened just slightly and when he looked you over, he noticed that you weren’t holding another bottle. So, he assumed that you were also now ready to go home.

“Want some company on your walk home?” Joel asked.

“I’d like that.”

Maria and Tommy watched the both of you leave the bar and they turned to each other with a grin.

“They’re good for each other,” Maria told Tommy.

“Just as long as Joel gets outta his head,” Tommy replied.

—

The walk home was quiet, but you both were taking your time getting home. There was no rush and you enjoyed each other’s company anyway.

“So,” Joel began. “You mentioned last night that you were married.”

You nodded, looking down at your feet. “I was, yeah.”

“Lucky man,” Joel commented.

You blushed, looking up at him as he kept his eyes forward. “You remind me of him actually.”

He arched a brow, glancing over at you. “That so?”

You both stopped walking once you were at your porch, turning to face each other. It was a quiet night, the outdoor string lights illuminating both of your features just right. Joel’s hands were in his pockets and your arms were crossed over your chest.

You looked up at him, staring into his dark brown eyes. You wanted nothing more than to just kiss him, to feel his lips, to feel safe again.

“Yeah,” you replied. “You make me feel safe, Joel.”

Joel cleared his throat, looking down at you. He inched closer, taking his hand from his pocket to move a strand of hair away from your face. His hand lingered on your cheek as his thumb gently brushed against your soft skin. He smiled, feeling you lean against his touch.

“M’glad,” he whispered. “You’re somethin’ else, you know that?”

Suddenly, you took a step back. The look on your face shifted instantly and it was no longer a look of desire, of want, but was replaced with a look of fear. You weren’t looking at Joel anymore. Instead, you were looking at a different man. A man from your past and when Joel took a step closer, you immediately raised your hands up.

“Don’t.”

“Darlin’–”

“I said don’t,” you repeated. “Get away from me.”

Joel’s brows furrowed, but he stopped himself from moving closer to you. He didn’t know what caused the drastic shift, but he hated the way you were looking at him. The fear in your eyes, but the threatening stance you were in… It was like you were a different person.

“Okay,” he whispered. “Okay.”

“You don’t get to hurt me again,” you mumbled, dropping your hands to your sides as it curled into fists. Tears were filling your eyes and Joel was at a loss. He didn’t know how to calm you down, how to make you see that you were safe and that whoever you were seeing wasn’t reality.

“Darlin’,” Joel repeated. “You’re in Jackson, okay? You’re safe. Ain’t no one gonna hurt you, I promise.”

“Stop!” You exclaimed, looking around frantically. You were vulnerable and when you realized you didn’t have any weapons, you kept taking a step back to further your distance. It wasn’t until you tripped over your own feet that you had fallen backwards, passing out in the process.

“Shit,” Joel mumbled. He scooped you up into his arms and brought you inside your home, looking around quickly. He gently set you on the sofa and grabbed a match to light up a candle. It was too dark, even for him, so once the candle was lit, he set it on the coffee table and sighed. He didn’t know what had just happened and he wasn’t sure if he should even stay, but Joel couldn’t help but stare at you.

You were sleeping, but you didn’t look peaceful. Your lips were formed into a pout and your brows were furrowed together. You had curled up into a ball once Joel set you on the couch and he could hear your quiet mumbling. It pained him to see you like this, especially since just an hour ago, you were dancing, smiling, and having fun.

Joel opted to stay, at least until you woke up. His back was killing him and he was exhausted, but you were far more important than sleep at the moment. He had to wonder how often your flashbacks occurred; he was fortunate to have had someone nearby, whether it was Tess, Tommy, or Ellie. He wasn’t ever alone and it put a lot of things into perspective when he found out that you had been on your own for over a year. He couldn’t imagine it.

It had been a couple of hours later when you awoke. You sat up in a quick motion, looking around the room and noticing the single candle that illuminated the living room. You noticed Joel had fallen asleep on the single loveseat, realizing what had happened. You felt embarrassed; you had tried to keep the negative parts of your past to yourself, but Joel had managed to see it firsthand.

You tried to think about what had triggered you. You knew you were both sharing a moment. You remembered the feel of his hand on your cheek and how you had willingly leaned against his touch. Then, you remembered what he said.

“You’re somethin’ else, you know that?”

To anyone else, it could have been sweet and special, but to you, it brought back memories of a past that you had tried to forget. It had been a year after you left the QZ in Washington, stumbling upon a group who had been happy to take you in. You kept your guard up though, making sure to keep your head down and contribute in any way that you can.

But the leader. The leader had a thing for you.

He had cornered you one night and said those same words. You could still remember the sound of his voice, the feel of his body forcefully against yours, the pain you felt when he hit you every time you tried to scream for help… It was something you would never forget and hearing Joel say those words had practically transported you back to that moment.

You slowly stood from the sofa, trying to quietly tiptoe down the hallway, but you didn’t get far. Joel had woken up and called your name in such a soft tone that you immediately looked over at him.

“I–I’m so sorry,” you whispered.

Joel stood with a low grunt, walking over to you slowly. “Ain’t gotta apologize.”

“That wasn’t your fault,” you mumbled. “It was– It was just my shit coming back and I’m sorry you had to see that.”

Joel stood in front of you. He understood exactly what that meant, and experienced it almost every night. “Hey…”

You bit your lip, bringing your eyes up at him. “Joel–”

“I’m here,” he replied. “For you.”

“Joel, you barely know me… We just met and–”

“You make me feel alive again,” Joel blurted out. He brought a hand to rub the back of his neck, sighing quietly. “M’sorry if that’s a bit too forward, but–”

Your response was to wrap your arms around him in a tight embrace. His scent filled your senses, causing your eyes to fall shut. When his arms moved around to wrap around your waist, you held onto him tighter.

Joel was taken by surprise when he felt your body press against his and your arms wrap around his frame. It didn’t take long before his arms wrapped around you as well, which caused him to feel your arms tighten around him. It was comforting, holding you this way and inhaling your scent. It felt like home.

He then buried his face against the side of your neck, his nose brushing against your skin. Joel could have held you like this forever.

You let out a shaky breath when you felt him move to bury himself against your neck. You felt his facial hair tickle your skin and his hot breath breathing against you. You had only known Joel for a couple of days and yet, this felt normal; it felt like you belonged here, in his arms.

You hadn’t felt this safe in so long.

You both stayed in each other’s arms for a few more minutes before you slowly pulled back. Your arms remained around his shoulders and his hands moved to rest on your hips. The distance between you both were mere inches and you could feel his breath against you.

“Thank you,” you whispered.

“Anythin’ for a friend.”

Friend.

“You should probably get home.” You said, pulling away from him and immediately missing his warmth and his strong arms around you.

Joel nodded, biting the inside of his cheek. “You gonna be okay?”

“I will be. I’ve survived this long,” you let a small smile line your lips. “I’ll be fine.”

“Well, I’m just right next door. Don’t hesitate to come over if you need anythin’, okay?”

You nodded. “Okay.”

Before Joel left, he pulled you into another hug, his eyes falling shut as he felt his entire body relax. It had been so long since he felt this way, but there was just something about you that made every concern, doubt, and worry that Joel felt, disappear.

“Goodnight, darlin’.”

You smiled against him, reveling in this moment. “Goodnight, Joel.”

—

It had been two weeks since that incident. You were slowly getting used to Jackson, now feeling like a part of the community. You still had nightmares, which happened more often than you liked to admit, but you kept it to yourself. Even when Joel asked how you were doing everyday, you had lied to him and said everything was great. You were glad he didn’t pry even further, simply just nodding and going about his day.

Since that night, it seemed like you and Joel had gotten closer. When he had the early morning patrols, he would come by your house with Ellie for dinner that it had become a routine for the three of you. You enjoyed their company though and Ellie knew just exactly how to get your mind off things; she was truly a breath of fresh air and you always found yourself laughing and having a good time with the young girl.

The school was finished; two rooms connected with a variety of small tables and chairs in each room. You had already met the parents and the children, thoroughly excited to start teaching again. You were going to teach all ages, but you had found that there were more younger kids than there were older ones. It seemed like most of the students you were going to teach would be around five to six years old with a small group of ten to twelve year olds.

You had started teaching and it gave you a sense of purpose and reminded you so much of the old world. It was tough in the beginning, but once you settled into a routine, the kids had found it so enjoyable. You ended every day in the reading corner that you created. All of your students gathered around you, listening intently as you read to them; each day was a different book, but your students were so engaged.

You always stayed until each of your students were picked up by their parents or family members. One day, however, a little girl stayed later than usual. She was sitting at the table, drawing on a piece of paper when you walked over to her.

“Hi Rosie,” you smiled. Her hair was curly, messy, and sat on her shoulders. She looked up at you and flashed you a toothless grin. She had told you all about losing her front teeth and how excited she was that she was now getting bigger.

She called you by your name with the Miss in front of it and then lifted the piece of paper for you to see.

“I drew a picture.”

“I see that, it’s beautiful.”

“It’s Jackson,” she grinned proudly.

“Looks exactly like it,” you smiled.

You were interrupted by the sound of footsteps running into the room. You looked up and noticed it was Rosie’s father. He was out of breath and had begun to apologize.

“I’m so sorry,” he said. Rosie grinned at the sight of her father, raising her arms to be picked up. “Patrol ran late.”

“No worries. Rosie here was just drawing a picture,” you smiled.

“Thank you,” he said. “For staying with her. Having this school– It’s been a relief.”

You nodded. The other man was a bit older than you, taller, and definitely muscular. He had blue eyes, brown hair, and dimples whenever he smiled. He was handsome, but he definitely was no Joel Miller.

“I’m glad,” you replied. “It’s been great to teach again.”

“I’m Jack. Rosie’s dad.” Rosie was already resting her head against her father’s shoulder, her eyes falling shut.

“I remember,” you said. “We met during the meeting with the other parents.”

“Right,” he chuckled. “Sorry, it’s just been–” Jack sighed. “It’s been tough. Patrols are getting tougher. We’re encountering more infected…”

“Well, if you’d like, I don’t mind staying a bit longer with Rosie until you get back to Jackson after patrols.” You offered as your mind drifted to what he had said. Infected. You had killed plenty: clickers, runners, stalkers, even encountered a Bloater once, and it still terrified you.

“Really?” He asked. “I mean, that’d be great, but you don’t have to. I can figure it out and–”

You shook your head, taking the drawing that Rosie had done and handing it to Jack. “I don’t mind, really. It’s okay.”

Jack smiled, letting out a sigh of relief. “You’re amazing. I owe you.”

You simply gave him a smile. “I’m your daughter’s teacher. It’s part of my job. Don’t worry about it.”

—

You were surprised to see Joel sitting on your porch once you finally walked home. When he saw you, he gave you a small smile and stood from his seat. You walked up your steps and looked over at him, giving him a tight hug.

“Hi,” you said.

Joel returned the hug and immediately missed your warmth once you pulled away to open the door. “Long day?”

You nodded, though you couldn’t stop thinking about what Jack had mentioned about his patrols. It was brief and not a lot of information, but it was enough for you to start ruminating on. Joel followed you inside and you quickly lit up a few candles to illuminate your living room and he noticed how quiet you had gotten again. It was something he took note of for the past couple of weeks.

“You okay?”

“Yeah,” you lied. “I’m just tired.”

“Should I go?”

Then, you blurted. “What’s going on outside of Jackson?”

“What?”

“Joel…”

He sighed. “Nothin’. We got it handled.”

“What’s going on?”

“Darlin’, you ain’t gotta worry about it.”

“Well, I am!” You exclaimed, not realizing how loud you had gotten. For weeks, you were putting on a facade, a front, masking your emotions and pushing away the nagging thoughts and flashbacks.

Joel was taken aback, looking at you with a furrowed brow. “It’s under control.”

“You’re lying,” you said. “Don’t lie to me, Joel.”

Joel sighed, running a hand over his face. “You’re safe here, in Jackson.”

“Bullshit,” you spat.

“What’s really goin’ on?”

“I can’t relax,” you mumbled. “I can’t sleep and when I do, I wake up in a sweat and frantic state.” You admitted. “Teaching is a good distraction, but I just thought– I thought I’d be okay.”

“You are,” he sighed. “I’m tellin’ you the truth. We have it under control.”

“The last time someone told me that our entire group was overrun,” you replied almost immediately. “So please… I can handle the truth.”

“The infected…” Joel let out an exhale. “We’re encounterin’ more of them on our patrols, but darlin’, we do have it under control. It’s just tiring.”

“Why didn’t you tell me before?”

“I didn’t wanna scare you.”

“I’m not this fragile little thing that you have to handle with care,” you said. “Stop treating me like I can’t handle myself, like I can’t handle what’s out there. I’ve done it! I’ve experienced it! I was out there, on my own, for over a year!”

“Okay,” he said. “Okay,” Joel repeated, trying to step closer to you but noticed how you had moved back and away from him.

“You don’t know half the things I’ve done to survive, Joel,” you admitted. “It haunts me… Every second of the day and I can’t run away from it.”

“You did what you had to, to survive,” Joel replied. It was ironic that he was saying the same words that Tommy had told him. Joel understood your dilemma, related exactly to what you were feeling, experiencing, and here you were, being open and vulnerable with him.

“No,” you shook your head. “No.”

“Darlin’...”

“Did you ever stop to think how I made it this far?” You asked.

“I don’t need to,” he replied.

“I’ve done so– so many unthinkable things, Joel,” you said with a shaky voice and teary eyes. “I’m so broken…”

“Hey…” Joel hated seeing you like this, hated hearing you talk about yourself like this. “Look at me…”

You looked up at him and felt yourself relax. You had been on edge for weeks and it finally came crashing down. You thought you could push this aside, to force yourself not to think about your past, but it was tough. Your nightmares served as a daily reminder of the things you had done, the people you killed… It was just too much.

“You ain’t alone in feeling like that,” Joel added. He knew that feeling all too well; being broken, damaged goods, and feeling like he didn’t deserve anything good because of the bad things he had done. He took a step closer and sighed in relief when you didn’t move away. “I– I have nightmares too.”

That wasn’t surprising to you. You had heard stories from the people in the community, but truthfully, it didn’t scare you. In fact, it made you feel safer to know that Joel would do anything for the people he cared about.

“H– How do you deal with it?”

“I don’t,” Joel admitted. “But I probably should.”

“We’re quite the pair, aren’t we?” You sighed.

“Come ‘ere,” he whispered, pulling you into his arms. When he felt your arms wrap around his shoulder, Joel moved his arms to wrap around your waist. Once again, he held you like this, feeling your warmth radiate against him and the feel of your chest heaving against his own.

“Joel,” you whispered to him. “You’re the only one that can calm me down, that can make me feel safe and I don’t know what that means, but–”

He held you tighter, pressing his lips to your temple. Joel sighed contentedly before he quietly interrupted you. “I’m here… I ain’t goin’ anywhere.”

You pulled back to look up at him. Your lips were mere inches from his and your arms remained around him. “Joel…”

“Hm?” He whispered, moving his hands to your hips. Joel rubbed circles against the fabric of your shirt, feeling it slightly lift upwards as the pads of his thumbs touched your skin.

“Can I– Can I kiss you?” You asked. A blush crept along your neck to your cheeks, biting your lower lip in anticipation.

Joel smiled and moved a hand to cup your cheek. The pad of his thumb brushed against your cheek as he leaned down to capture your lips with his own.

It was electrifying, feeling your lips slowly move against his. Joel kept his hand on your cheek and used his free hand to bring you flush against him, his hand moving from your hip to your lower back.

You had imagined this moment plenty of times and yet, this was far better than your imagination. Joel kept a protective hold around you as you felt yourself mold against his strong frame. Your lips moved expertly with his and when you whimpered, Joel used that as an opportunity to dart his tongue out. It was perfect and it was intoxicating.

Joel had to pull away, feeling the center of his pants tighten from the pressure of his member pressing against the fabric.

“We should–”

“Can you stay?” You interrupted.

“You sure?” Joel asked.

You nodded. “I just– I don’t want to be alone.”

“That makes two of us,” he whispered. Joel leaned down to peck your lips, smiling once he pulled away.

You led him down the hallway and to your bedroom. You removed your boots and socks, tossing your flannel to the side. You lied back in bed, clad in a t-shirt and jeans before watching Joel do the same with his own boots. When he climbed into bed with you, you felt yourself instinctively move closer to him.

Joel was lying on his back with his arm stretched out for you. You smiled to yourself and moved closer until your head rested against his shoulder, his arm wrapping around you.

The string lights from outside illuminated your room, giving you and Joel a perfect view of each other. You were staring into each other’s eyes before he leaned down to press his lips against yours once more.

You moved to lie on your back, feeling him move to hover above you. Joel gently bit at your lower lip, hearing you quietly moan against his lips. The sounds you were making immediately caused a reaction from him, blood rushing straight down to the center of his pants.

“Joel…” You mumbled against his lips.

He pulled back, his arm propped up with his other hand resting on your hip. “M’sorry, we should stop.”

You shook your head. “I want you.”

Joel grunted lowly. “A– Are you sure?”

“Take me, Joel.”

---

Part 5.

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slightly-gay-pogohammer · 1 year

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Hey gio I accidentally got into an argument about how Rowling, and how she’s not transphobic and how’s she’s misunderstood, do you have a list of reliable sources and evidence to point out she’s not a good person?

okay i want to say that. unfortunately i DID have some discussions similar to this in the past, and they always ended with the other person going "let's agree to disagree :)" and so i know it's a lowkey Lost Cause. however. wanna give out obvious proof? like nothing that can be misread or misunderstood?? like of course i can just throw her twitter link here and call it a day, but again. i've met people who were adamant and kept saying that she was just pro women, well.

sure let's go. putting it under read more because i know that it's very upsetting. we're discussing transphobia, but i also want to lampshade her racism and much more so. yeah.

also point 0.5: i know you want proof of transphobia but i want to remind everyone that she's a bad person through and through. just by reading the book you can see a lot of fatphobia - especially with the dursleys - excusing slavery with the house elves to the point that the only one who's happy with being free is considered "weird" and the one person who wants to fight for their rights being constantly used a a joke, antisemitism with the goblins description, the racism when it comes to non-white characters (the chinese character is literally called cho chang and whatever the fuck she did with the native americans) and much, much more. I won't lie, I still have fond memories of the books from when I read them as a child, but you can't ignore that she really pissed outside the bucket more than once

1. again, just read the books. in harry potter i think it's just something very vaguely hinted with Rita Skeeter being described as masculine and being a character who constantly badmouths and stalks the underage protagonists, and we all know how her main villain in "troubled blood" is what a trans woman is in the eyes of a terf: just a man who crossdresses to enter in women's bathrooms to kill them. there's also her new book where she makes the victim we need to avenge a cartoonist who's killed for being accused of being transphobic, but honestly i didn't read too much into it nor i want to because just the premise makes my blood boil

2. small, but while her rampage on twitter can "be misunderstood" as "her protecting women" ( no it can't, but again. that's what people i discussed with were preaching :^) ), i think the ultimate smoking gun was her blocking stephen king, someone she openly reverred jus a few hours before he stated that trans women are women

3. similarly, Katherine Waterson, the actress who played the main love interest in "Fantastic Beasts", was casually pushed aside after she was very openly went against J.K.'s transphobia. In the latest movie her character was "unavailable" until th very end, as far as I know, where they rushed to close her love arc.

3.5. the actors of Harry, Ron and Hermione and many others were also openly supporting trans people btw, and since she doesn't really have power over them anymore Rowling being absent to the Harry Potter reunion really says a lot to me

4. This is my personal smoking gun: her promoting a terf site

i think the name of the site itself is proof enough, but just to make sure that they didn't have a sudden change of heart or it could "be misunderstood" i took one for the team and checked their site and

this was their landing page besties. can't be more obvious than this

5. JK yes you can. Wanna know with who she hangs with lately?

youtube

these people :) I heavily encourage watching this video, as upsetting as it might be -- and check out this channel's Harry Potter essay too, they really go deep into how badly she fucked up, but the TL;DR version of the video above is "they're all terfs" like you can say you're not transphobic as much as you want, but if most of your besties are transphobes I think it's kind of obvious you are too

6. "Merry Terfmas"

#gio replies #transphobia tw #racism tw #fatphobia tw #yea we're going there #im not really good at these kind of serious posts but shitting on this devil of a woman is always fun #< as fun as the acid reflux i'm getting rereading her tweets might be anyway

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mollysunder · 8 months

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Everytime it Wasn't Swain

After rewatching Arcane, I decided to make a list for everytime Swain was almost there. You thought he was being alluded to, but he wasn't, it was actually something else. Or was it?

1. The Crows

Swain has ravens, not crows, there just happen to be a suspiciously large quantity of crows, for a port city, instead of seagulls. As the show went on, the arrival of crows became synonymous with Jinx's presence and vice versa. It's not hard to see why, crows are intelligent and naturally social birds that do well in urban ecosystems, they just have a mixed reputation as good and bad omens. On a narrative level, the presence of crows does have interesting implications. Crows and ravens are easily confused for the other if you don't know what to look for. And the more I read about Swain, the more I notice that he and Jinx (in Arcane) are similar in some regards. Not just the fact they killed and maimed their family members, that's not uncommon for League backstories for some reason. From a storytelling standpoint, they both serve as living embodiment of their respective nations, good and bad, that other characters have to react to. And it was their actions that changed the trajectory of their nations.

What's even more interesting is that crows and raven in real life don't get along, they're incredibly territorial and avoid one another. If they do cross paths, crows are more likely to pick a fight with ravens. Despite the raven being bigger, crows band together in large groups to fend off ravens from their nesting areas, sort of like they harass them away. Food for thought.

2. The Man Named Jericho but not Swain

This one was cute. It took me a while to realize that they both had the same first name, except Swain has a last name, which is Swain. The first time his name was mentioned was when Vi and Caitlyn were on the search for Silco, but Vi was really on the search for Jinx. Funny enough, Jericho's apron and pants looks like the Jinx's outfit. I know plenty of people wear pinstripes in Zaun, but the black triangle with the 'X' in the center was pretty on the nose. On one hand this shot could foreshadow the way Jinx's actions come between Caitlyn and Vi. On the other, that's not as fun, and I want to know if this makes Jericho a Jinx stan! Seriously, maybe it's another hint at the way Zaun and Noxus are similar threats to Piltover, just in different clothes. Or Swain's a Jinx stan too!

3. The Palette Portrait

I've watched Arcane more than once and never managed to see it before, and wasn't too sure it was Swain until I outlined the figure myself. There he is long white hair, red magic hand, widow's peak, and sharp profile. In context, this is part of the scene where Mel is aggressively painting while Jayce apologizes for leaving her alone in bed the night Viktor collapsed. It's the first time Jayce and the audience sees her paint, and is essentially one of the first moments we get to see a part of her inner life. In this exact shot she says, "There's a lot you don't know about me". I'd say pretty on the nose to say this is foreshadowing her past connections to Noxus. But there's small things that are off, for example, Swain is draped in red rather than a severe black. And his face is dark while he's a white man, the color choices actually fit Ambessa more than Swain. Another fake out? Or maybe it means that there's no difference between people like Swain and Ambessa in the grand scheme of Noxus' war machine.

All in all I found three times Swain's presence was almost confirmed, but instead was something or someone else. There was always one or two details off to make it so. Each time there was an "almost Swain" connection, it was usually in association with Jinx or Mel, a cast member actually from Noxus. Swain, or at least the concept of Swain, seems to haunt the Mel's past and Jinx's future.

#arcane #jinx arcane #mel medarda #jericho arcane #jericho swain #swain lol #you know the saying #once is chance #twice is coincidence #third times a pattern #jinx making zaun look untenable as a future colony to ward off swain and noxus in general #maybe this is the last time I mention Swain finally

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primeministerofantarctica · 7 months

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so. turns out this was easier than i thought

ignore the two generic smurfs after smurfette they're just there bc the formatting sucks :/

also i couldn't find a finance smurf but he belongs in the "burn in smurf hell'' category <3

also i have time to kill so. list below the cut!

1. Clumsy - sweetheart. doesn't have a mean bone in their body. very autistic.

2. Lazy - i don't know how to explain lazy being an unintentional allegory for people with invisible disabilities that are considered a burden and. lazy under capitalism. but he has a big heart and cares about his friends even when they're less than considerate towards him (seriously, WHAT was the slumber party episode? were they like, intentionally trying to torture him?)

3. Jokey - "Oh, the folly of a clown, masking his loneliness with a joke!" <- person who definitely doesn't have any internal issues :). Also can we just appreciate the fact that he has ONE main prank and everybody still falls for it. (not to mention that the prank is. giving people bombs)

4. Timid - he BABY

5. Scaredy - he baby 2

6. Smurfette - specifically lost village smurfette cuz that was where she peaked. you go girl give us an identity crisis and journey of self-discovery only to find the answer was with you all along!

7. Greedy - comics/ 2021 specifically, because him and chef being distinct characters is funny as hell. he's so cute i would totally give him a muffin if he asked.

8. Harmony - he sucks so bad at what he's supposed to be best at! and i think that's so interesting and criminally underexplored! and every time he gets the other smurfs to like his music it ends badly :(.

9. Painter - dramatic ass bitch (affectionate). why was he the only french person in belgium.

10. Doctor - i assume that one's doctor at least. it is now. anyways he's funny as hell, like harmony he's also...bad at his passion. he doesn't have a reason to be a quack, he's just. Like That.

11. Reporter - I like his voice.

12. Poet - there is NO need to speak in couplets all the time, he's so extra.

13. Tailor - "*terrible Kip King impression* EVERYBODY STOP COMPLAINING OR I'LL SCREAM." He's really nice, he made Smurfette that dress in one episode even though he was busy, and he made Tracker a fur coat out of the scraps he gave him and Vanity a scarf with his face hand-embroidered on it just because? AND more importantly, he's very blunt. i like that :)

14. Hefty - no no you didn't see my love for strong muscular guys that are kind and caring and totally whipped for that one girl. ok he's not maws level but like. if you can put "she's so high" by tal bachman in a ship playlist then you've got a valid m/f ship

15. Grouchy - let him say hate again oh god please i will tear my ears out if i have to hear "me, I don't like x" again. fuckin WEAK. also the grammar i wanna curl up on the floor and cry.

16. Farmer - remember when all the smurfs only wore white pants so to distinguish farmer from the others he would just be randomly carrying a hoe for no reason. also his accent is SO silly in the new cartoon i love it.

17. Vanity - just...watch this.

18. Brainy - i'm sorry for putting him so low brainy fans can you ever forgive me /hj. with all fairness i do think he's an interesting character! he's just...interesting in a way that doesn't really appeal to me specifically.

19. Handy - i feel like he would build a doomsday device if he got bored one afternoon and honestly? i respect that.

20. Papa Smurf - sometimes he's a good father figure. sometimes he's a terrible "father figure". it depends on the medium. and the direction of the wind.

21. King (pretentious) Smurf - made a whole authoritarian regime in like. two days. what the hell man.

22. Finance - capitalist :/

#astra rambles #smurfblogging #this gets more incoherent as it goes on

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weezly14 · 9 months

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Hey Weezly, wondered about your thoughts on EP 9 of TCR. Tough one to watch, at least for me anyway. Thanks!

Hi there. You may regret asking for my thoughts.

Let me preface this by saying that I came into this show wanting to like it. I think Tom Holland is a great actor, and the source material was interesting, and I was curious to see what they'd do with it - especially once it became clear they were going the "inspired by" route rather than an adaptation of the Billy Milligan book.

That being said, I think episode 9 is when we start seeing the plot really get going, and, as a result, see just how poorly constructed it is. Episode 9 laid bare all the flaws and issues I could ignore in previous episodes. I'm going to watch the last episode because I've invested all this time already, but I liked this show a lot more before I watched this episode.

Here's a brief bullet-pointed list of some of my issues with it:

i hate this courtroom drama angle. a) that's not how trial works and b) why the fuck are we having a trial in the first place. Is he not pleading guilty? The trial just makes it clear how convoluted and contrived the case is - a shooting that injured but did not kill - and I know we were given the heads up that the defense lawyer isn't a good trial lawyer 2 episodes ago or something, but god, I could've represented Danny better. And the prosecutor gave a great performance except I cannot imagine a judge allowing half the shit he did. Also, again, the defense lawyer? Didn't cross-examine Marlin? wtf

the racial and sexual politics of this show are all the fuck over the place, and I could sort of let it slide but nope, now I've gotta call it out. 1) the prosecutor has been so clearly and completely painted as The Bad Guy so she's an easy target for abuse from viewers because she's being mean to our protagonist, and the fact that she (and the judge, who I assume will give Danny a harsh sentence next week - because the jury decides the verdict but the judge decides the sentence) is black and Danny is white? Feels some kind of way. 2) Angelo on the stand? This is a drug dealer, why would he show up? Further on Angelo - in like a 10 second scene last week we saw that Jonny-Danny had apparently a sexual relationship with him which makes the trying to get a gun scene hit so different. There's so much to unpack here. And yet. 3) Jerome. So, like most of the actors on this show, he's given a great performance. He and Tom have had some great scenes. But a) the amount of emotional labor this black character has done for the white character he barely knows is vaguely upsetting, b) when we're first introduced to Jerome via Ariana it doesn't come across as Great Love (sure we can debate this but I digress) but as soon as he seeks out Danny in prison and on the stand we get that narrative of practically Soulmates, c) this show purports to take place in the 70s - not a great time to be gay! To say nothing of the extra layer of race. Stonewall was 1969, dudes. On the one hand, super glad we're not having to listen to slurs. On the other, how is seemingly everyone barely blinking at Danny having a female alter or at the very least, if they don't accept the idea of alters, cross-dressing and fucking dudes? The prosecutor tries to prove that Jerome and Danny/Ariana weren't a couple because they never interactied outside the club - I'm sorry, it's the 1970s. Again, there is so much to unpack here re: Jerome as both a black man and a gay man and! We are getting! Nothing!

I liked Rya well enough but this episode she really grated on me? Her monologues felt preachy and patronizing.

Candy. So, one of the things I've come back to over and over is - we know Marlin abused Danny, and now we're to believe that Candy, on some level, knew. We also know that she married Marlin and theoretically stayed with him for financial reasons. Financial abuse is real, I'm not discounting that. But aside from being a dick, we don't really see Candy and Marlin's relationship as terribly abusive. She's so deferential to him, and yet we never see why, what has her so scared of him. She has a job! Her child is out of the house! Her characterization has been nearly nonexistent and it's frustrating.

So after struggling with undiagnosed MPD/DID for his entire life, we're supposed to accept that Danny, who was given a diagnosis like three days ago, is suddenly able to control his alters? With no issue? The scene 2? 3? Episodes ago where he tells Rya there are voices and he needs help is completely undermined by how much of a nonissue his alters have been in the interim.

All press tour Tom has been saying this show is about asking for help, and Danny asked for help in that scene - which was a great scene, I felt so seen there - and then in episode 9 we get Rya saying how brave or whatever Danny is for asking for help. BUT! He didn't! He committed a crime and was sent to jail and ended up in these therapy/interrogation sessions and then eventually yes, asked for help. But he was not out there crying for help, asking to be saved. He had his alters! He was unaware that he wasn't okay!

It's so clear that this show doesn't know what it wants to be and doesn't know what its focus is. Is it Danny? Is it Rya? The first 4 episodes are their own fucking show, and 6-9 are their own show. 5 feels like its own thing, too.

Additionally, this show is set in the 1970s. Why? Because Billy Milligan. Except they took the teeth out of that story, completely sanitized it to the point that there are virtually no stakes, but kept the set dressing. But that's literally all it is at this point. We get b-roll of 70s London, we have the costumes and cars, but aside from one shot of defense lawyer in army fatigues, we have no real sense of where we are in time. That is the only allusion to Vietnam. The prosecutor talked about incarceration like she's also read The New Jim Crow. Not a slur to be heard despite the fact that we are allegedly between Stonewall and AIDS. Rya talks about mental health like someone might in the present day. If they were already going to not make this about Billy Milligan, why the fuck did they keep it set in the 70s?

It is so frustrating because the actors are giving it their all. Tom? No notes. I was moved this episode, I've been moved all season. But I cannot get away from how poorly constructed this all is. This could've been so good. We should've spent more time digging into each alter. (What the fuck purpose did Mike serve? Ariana is the one "who can have sex" yet we also see Jonny engaging in sex?) What about the other dead alters in the barn? What about Adam. It has been hinted at all season that Marlin was not the first - the existence of Adam before Marlin would indicate that Danny had already experienced something that caused his psyche to split. we know nothing about dad. we still know nothing about Adam!!!!!!! Are we ever getting that resolution? Then what was the goddamn point? Why is there even a trial. Why have him commit a crime that's so toothless and that he's so obviously guilty of? Why structure this around a crime in the first place? Emmy Rossum has been severely underutilized, fuck, even Amanda Seyfried. Cannot believe they got Jason Isaacs to be in like. 17 minutes of this show. And once again, Tom Holland can have no lines and still be the most interesting character on screen. Can he go back to theatre, I'd love to see what he can do with a good script if this is what he can accomplish with a bad one.

I'm tired. This show had such potential, and it's tripping at the finish line. After taking four episodes to get started. Acting is great, cinematography has been good, but story? Writing? It's disappointing. I'm frustrated.

#weezly talks tcr #i'm gonna lose followers i can feel it #if you like this show then good for you!#not saying you can't!

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olderthannetfic · 2 years

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To be honest I think that “gatekeeping” fandom is okay sometimes. I’m saying this as I am bombarded with shitty news articles about the new Amazon prime LotR show and anticipating a major fandom clash… As someone who will never support Amazon and fucking hates how they’re using their new show to make all their detractors seem like racists/sexists (despite how incredibly racist and abusive to PoC Amazon as a company is) and drum up good press to draw attention away from their recent human rights abuses and controversies… I reserve the right to not wholeheartedly welcome fans of the Rings of Power adaptation into my fandom.

I know other Tolkien fans who’ve watched (pirated) it and they’ve all told me it’s just not great in an adaptation sense. From what I’ve seen of the plot and casting it looks like it was made by someone who’s never read even a chapter of Tolkien, and the designs/costuming look uninspired. I’m usually someone who adores adaptations, even shitty superhero films from the early 2000s, but the general inaccuracy of this one did it in for me, and it being picked up by Amazon is the final nail in the coffin for me. No thank you, I’m not going to let this soul-sucking company capitalize on my nostalgia.

A slightly pettier point, but if anyone’s first and only interacting with second and first age Tolkien characters comes from RoP I do actually think they should pick up a book and read. Like no Celebrimbor isn’t some fucking ugly ass crusty old white man. He was a HOTTIE and he lived and served cunt and then he got crucified by his dark lord boyfriend. Fuck Jeff Bezos, if anyone tries that shit in our god-honoring ao3 tag I’m gonna kill someone. It’s gonna be like when someone thinks they’re an expert on a video game and you’re like “have you ever played it?” And they say “no I just watched a YouTube video”.

I’m normally a much, much kinder person and maybe I’m overreacting but holy shit I hate how people are acting like this show is a GOOD THING when it’s clearly a marketing ploy by Amazon to associate LotR with their company and therefore give them a never ending stream of income.

Well, I think there are a few different things going on here, but yes.

When a new adaptation comes out that's going to have a massive audience, it's important to be able to defend some little spaces for the existing fandom. AO3 book fandom tags are going to get misused and stuck on fic for the live action version (in the usual way adaptations play out anyway). Tumblr tags will be a freeforall. So it's down to recs lists, mailing lists, discord servers, DW communities, and the like to maintain a space for the quiet-but-long-lived version of the fandom while the storm of a new adaptation thunders by overhead.

That's true even if the adaptation isn't a travesty, and it doesn't preclude being nice to the n00bs and welcoming them in if they are interested in the pre-existing fandom. But being "nice" doesn't mean erasing all distinctions between versions of the fandom and canon or turning every space into a 101 For N00bs space.

I mean, I enjoyed movie LOTR fandom and thought most aspects of those movies were a decent adaptation (except for Helm's Deep, Faramir wanting the ring, and everyfuckingthing about Gimli, GRRRRRRR). But it was still the case that we movie fans overran Tolkien-themed spaces with our Legolas/Aragorn fic, and that this was not always great. LOL. Same deal with the many iterations of Sherlock Holmes, even aside from the OOC horror that is Sherlock.

There's gatekeeping like quizzing everyone on whether they're enough of a Real Fan™ and being an ass just because someone wasn't born early enough to get into fandom in whatever decade...

And then there's gatekeeping like declaring that not every space is for every thing.

We need the latter in order for little subcultures to thrive.

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lucero-is-here · 10 months

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The camera shows a video recording of the courthouse in Concordia. All of a sudden, the doors are flung open and a man with white hair in a dark blue suit and a blue cravat with stars stepped out.

“Good morning, evening or afternoon, ladies, gentlemen and folks! It’s headcanon time! Archie Rochester!”

Requested by:

Now I have beef with Archie, a LOT of beef. But I’ll do him anyways, cause he was an interesting character nonetheless and a request is a request is it not? And TW for parental issues and drinking.

- he cares a lot about his looks. He spends a lot of time on fixing up his suit, styling his hair and making sure he looks presentable.

- When he was revealed to be Mr Alastor, and behind all the killings that happened in his parties, he mocked Arthur. He laughed on how he was so skilled for being able to pull this off, and questioned what Arthur did when he was 19. You can probably guess Arthur’s face from this, since he wasn’t actually able to argue back.

- close with Rockley and Bernadine. He spends more time with the both of them then his parents.

- (angst) after anything too difficult or stressful on him, he goes to Rockley to cry. He gets that upset by these things, but doesn’t trust his parents enough to go to them and cry about it.

- he really really cares about Bernadine. She was kind of like a second parent to him, and she spent a lot of time with him when he was growing up. His parents were often busy, so Bernadine let him stay with her. When she held exhibitions, he would help set them up sometimes (this was when he was a child), and she always made him part of something in a sense. So he’s really attached to her.

- he was genuinely scared when he got punched in that one case. But he acted cocky about it, cause he didn’t want to show fear or anything-

- if he was born in this timing with the same lifestyle and found out about twitter or some social media, all of his posts would be dissing off Malcolm.

- when Archie met Arthur again cause of Bernadine, his decision to remain civil was not to upset Bernadine, cause he really loves his aunt. Although he would have taunted and mocked Arthur again, he didn’t want to make Bernadine sad, so he stayed quiet and just acted polite.

- bisexual cause I said so

- he has a list of his family that goes from loves, to absolutely despise them. Here’s how it goes: Rockley, Bernadine, Leopold, Veronica, Larry, Clarissa, Horatio and Malcolm. Viola isn’t include cause Archie didn’t even try to get to know her.

- he likes lettuce. He doesn’t know why, he just likes eating lettuce-

- after he managed to properly meet Arthur because of Bernadine, conversations between the two were always awkward. Sometimes Bernadine would have Arthur over in her house, and Archie was coincidentally be there. And if Bernadine disappears for anything, Arthur and Archie just stare at each other questioning everything.

- Archie has committed a lot of crimes- asides from the killings, he may or may not have set something on fire once. You can probably imagine what happened to him when Malcolm found out.

- I like to think he called Rockley “dad” by accident once. Rockley’s reaction was to laugh at his nephew, and pat Archie’s back.

- he can play the piano and violin really well- Leopold taught him how to play the piano and violin ^^ Bernadine and Rockley also watch Archie when he practices, and always applaud and give me advice to improve.

- he drank whiskey once. He wasn’t even an adult he just- TOOK A CUP AND DRANK IT AND WENT: “…I think that was liquor,” before passing out. Rockley rushed him to a hospital.

- He’s not strong at all- he can’t fight, he can’t lift weights- He’s basically really kinda weak (yeah which wasn’t good for him)

- he likes candy, but hates black liquorice.

- he has no friends (okay I headcanon he has one friend which is my OC, but I killed off that OC so yeah Archie’s friendless)

- (him and Arthur’s relationship) at one point, he actually managed to have a half decent conversation with Arthur. They asked about each other’s day and everything- Until Archie tried to pry into the Concordian’s Flying Squad’s business, then did the conversation turned really awkward. Archie kinda regrets it- cause he was actually enjoying the conversation.

- he doesn’t talk to his parents that much. He’s kinda just been taken care by relatives and maids more than his own parents.

That’s all I got for now. If I somehow think of more, I’ll write a part 2.

#criminal case #headcanons #archie rochester

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theburningsunset · 4 months

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my adhd can't chill tf down enough to sleep so may i present this (uhhh spoilers for new-who):

Everything in Doctor Who that ought to be fixed and why:

Any time the doctor shows racism, queerphobia, sexism, ableism, classism, etc. Unless a specific prejudice of Gallifreyan society exists, it would never make sense for the Doctor to be bigoted, even the one from the '60s

Related: when Thirteen breaks the Master's perception filter so the nazis would see he's a man of color and thus endanger him—the Doctor would never.

Completely abandon former companions. Maybe some, maybe originally, but even 2000 years of lessons learned later? The Doctor is a good man, abandonment is too inconsistent with his characterization to be a reoccurring, unchallenged trait.

Wiping Donna's memory. Cruel, erased her character arc and was not a fulfilling or meaningful end. Either kill her or have her decide to retire.

The convoluted reason the Ponds were stuck in 1939 New York. C'mon, if I tried for five seconds I could come up with a sensical reason why the Doctor never saw them and they were stuck. Or just don't make them stuck 🤷🏼‍♀️ maybe they decide to adopt and retire to avoid danger to the kid but the Doctor and River still regularly visit.

The "War Doctor". Showrunners confirmed this only existed because Christopher Eccleston refused to come back for the 50th Special (no shade to his choice). It might've backfired or seemed disrespectful of Chris's performance, but they should've simply recast Nine for it.

Just throw out Kill the Moon, it was bad writing, the heavy-handed abortion allegory was exhausting and weird (regardless of intentionality) and I don't usually cry "but the science!" but...the moon being gone, even if soon after it replaced itself, would cause apocalyptic destruction on Earth and possibly wipe out humanity. The primary salvageable bit that I think is integral is the Twelve/Clara fight at the end.

Danny Pink either doesn't die or doesn't stay dead. The paradox it would cause for him to die before him and Clara have kids when her and Twelve have MET those descendants and been on two separate adventures down that family line is irreconcilable. Full stop.

Bill doesn't die. The end. (Do NOT bury your fucking gays)

Don't have Graham be the last white seat on the Rosa episode, for fucking christ's sake. Plus where the fuck is at least the mention of Claudette Colvin?

Fourteen regenerates into Thirteen's clothes, following well-established rules of regeneration (BBC were cowards for breaking that just to sidestep having David Tennant "crossdress")

Headcanon bits that aren't necessarily tied to quality/consistent writing but I think would've been great:

The Doctor does find Melody. Maybe only by age six or so, if wanting to keep the Silence story intact, but rework Let's Kill Hitler to avoid the Mel situation. It makes me sad that they never got their baby back. She can still turn out to be River, maybe the regen into River only happened post season-six, keeping the reveal. Maybe Melody was eventually re-kidnapped by the Silence and then turned into River Song, or maybe Melody was always a kind of troubled trouble-maker and took on the River Song alias on her own.

Thirteen and Yaz absolutely get together.

keep in mind I haven't finished Thirteen's run (the stink of neolib BS from the Rosa Parks episode tanked my interest in keeping up until Chibnall fucked off), haven't seen the 60th Special yet, still have 20-something seasons of Classic Who to go, and don't remember everything I have seen, nor am I always right. I think on re-watch I'd find more issues but for now it's the list I've got that exactly zero (0) people asked for.

#doctor who #my writer brain refuses to let go of any of these grudges #maybe now ill finally be able to fucking get some goddamn sleep

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cosmicdorito · 1 year

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🪦 tv tag game <3 🪦

— list 8 shows for your followers to get to know you better. tagged by @michaelmandog we have some overlap so ill pick different gifs lmao

NBC's Hannibal

yea it has problems but it helped awaken the hidden goth part of me when i first watched it. yea the movies and books were better but the cinematography on this was insane imo

2. Better Call Saul

i would sell my soul for the chance to be in the same room as lalo salamanca. he consumes me. every single episode i watched with my bf i asked when he was gonna show up. for 4 entire seasons he had to listen to me say "is this when lalo gets introduced?" when he died i had to leave the room and go cry in my bathroom for more than ten minutes i was so incredibly distraught it was like i lost a real person in my life

3. Breaking Bad

obligatory after BCS. i dont like breaking bad for the narrative or the deep meaning or any of that bullshit i liked it because i enjoy taking the piss out of every single thing walter white does and my boyfriend had to listen to me explain in detail how i wouldve killed him if i had the chance every single episode. jesse and skyler deserve the world

4. Yellowjackets

i wholeheartedly support lottie matthews the cannibal antler queen and want to join her cult so badly. let me in. im at the gates im in the woods let me in. i wanna sacrifice i wanna live in the woods i wanna wear antlers and do dodgy witchcraft and pray to tree stump altars. i do half that stuff anyway let me in lottie

5. Life Below Zero

i know this makes me a nerd since this is a natgeo docuseries (?) but its genuinely one of my favourite shows. i know all the shit that happens to them is mostly staged but there's a lot of indigenous inupiaq people highlighted on this show and they show off their culture so respectfully and also sometimes it just has me on the edge of my seat like sue aikens goes "idk what that sound was. maybe a wolf" and i go "oh shit. a wolf!!!"

6. TUT

as far as ancient egyptian dramas (my long time only historical interest ive been an ancient egypt dictionary since i was 10 years old) this one wasnt too bad! which is saying a lot cough netflix cleopatra. the costumes were decent and as far as historical accuracy it wasnt the worst ive seen.

7. Sr. Ávila

i admittedly only started watching this because tony's in it but ive actually come to really like it as its own show separate from him. its dark and emotional and im really invested in his story and saving his family while trying to keep the syndicate operating at the same time. its kind of like lalo lite. walmart lalo.

8. Book of Boba Fett

i loved how much this show pissed off the star wars dudebros. im not even really into star wars anymore but the way they redid his character and gave him an actual personality and morals to compliment his established backstory was so good and for some reason the middle aged incels hated it and thats what i love. hes also hot as fuck. thick thick man.

tagging the same people as before im so sorry i only have like 5 mutuals or something like that lmfao so if no one else does this thats ok i just liked looking for cool gifs @yaoifag @bucketbug @kettleghost @chesswizards @kidkubrick @apyrisol

#i just love looking at gifs #you guys dont understand how i had to hold back from putting 5 natgeo shows on here #i literally only watch natgeo in my own time #i love natgeo. documentaries. nature shows. im an old man at heart

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torterracotta · 8 months

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BANSHEE???? THE COP?????

look, i went from the available choices, and my vote went to Beto anyway

Let's break these choices down, yeah?

Cyclops - tl;dr There are specific periods of time where Scott is "hot," and the vast majority of the time he isn't! Is he my blorbo? Yes. Do I run a sideblog where the header is his Foxy Grandpa Ass jutting out? Of course. Can I vote him in good conscience? I don't think so.

Colossus - the man spent how much time trying to fuck a fourteen year old? He heard Mutants were moving to a sex cult island and was baffled because his dead pal Jeff was a human. Pass.

Gambit - not even with Rogue's dick.

Wolverine - I only barely believe he can find the clit, and have ZERO confidence he could locate my prostate, and I'm unsure enough about his grooming habits that I wouldn't willingly put any part of myself in any part of him. Pass.

Iceman - Closeted Iceman? Maybe. But out Iceman is an overcompensating baby gay written almost exclusively by straight dudes, and I have a strict policy of never touching white gays who have "BBC" in their search history.

Warren Kenneth Worthington the Third - do you know what happens to Angel's love interests? I'd rather not be hatecrimed by Cameron Hodge for a few sweaty minutes of underwhelming halfhearted bottoming from a princess who provides the own stuffing for his pillows. Keep flying, birdboy.

Nightcrawler - I know, I know, the man is a sex icon, but I'm not getting involved in any of that family drama. If it's not his evil lesbian moms trying to kill me, it'd be his step-sisters trying to get back in his spandex. Not worth it, especially after all that shit in Way of X.

Havok - Matt Fraction's Clint Barton: The Mutant Flavor???? Listen, I adore a broken man who knows his place as much as the next nigga, don't get me wrong, but if I'm not picking Scott, I'm definitely not picking his Luigi.

I do appreciate his commitment to the bit, though.

Banshee - let's jump back to Cyclops for a minute. Without getting into shipping war bullshit, most of the times he's been "hot" are when he's playing off of Emma Frost, right? Emma's tertiary mutation is the ability to make everyone else more interesting just by association, because she's fucking great. I mean I just read an Iron Man book for her, for fuck's sake. Back in the 90's, when she was newly not-evil, she and Banshee were essentially the co-leads of Generation X, a book that, when it wasn't being the New New New Mutants, about two unreasonably sexy people who couldn't stand each other being unreasonably sexy at each other. Even putting that aside (and if you read a few issues, you'll get it), the man's spent decades dedicated to flying around with his tits out due to mysterious clothing damage, amd I appreciate that.

Sunspot - look, I fixated on him when I was nine, as the only character I could find who was like me at all, and that was ignoring all the gay subtext with his best friend even before it turned into outright queerbaiting. I grew up with him, and he's only gotten better since then. He's the only dude in my top 5 muties. He's flawless (give or take bad taste in men and a propensity for being whitewashed), he's perfect, he's hilarious, he's my vote AND yours, he's Sunspot.

Cannonball - in my seminal 2020 fic, "How Many Times Would You Say You've Been In Love," I summed Beto's Best Boy up thusly:

Sam laughed, a quiet, gentle, chuckle that crinkled the corners of his eyes, not that Roberto could bring himself to look at them. Instead his own eyes travelled everywhere else, from Sam's mess of a mop, to his strong jaw, to the gap in his front teeth, his okay-for-a-white-boy lips, the freckles that covered his nose, and ending up…

Do I love Sam as a character? Absolutely, he's one of the best. But he's not hot, he's a lapse in taste. Love conquers all, they say. 😔

Bishop - as one of exactly two Black men the poll listed, I want to give Bishop his flowers, but I have never read a good Bishop story where he wasn't awful. No baby gays, but no self-hating Black genocidaires, either.

#x men

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multi-lefaiye · 2 years

Text

Magic Apocalyptica Characters

Hi hello-

So I’ve been thinking a lot about... well it’s not one WIP, but my setting Magic Apocalyptica, which has a bunch of characters but only the vaguest possible plot. Most of these characters don’t have art yet (I’m working on it-) so I’m gonna introduce them with picrews :) Yeah. This is not an exhaustive list of every character in this ‘verse, just the major ones I’ve made.

For context, Magic Apocalyptica is a post-apocalyptic fantasy setting in which the apocalypse happened, but instead of killing everyone it awoke several slumbering gods and also magic. Things got Funky.

These characters’ stories are mostly disconnected, but I’m working to find ways to connect them! Someday I’ll get a coherent plot out of this ‘verse.

So! Each character will have a picrew (picrew used: [link]), their name, a brief description, one song that I think fits them perfectly, and a fun fact or two :) Yeah.

Uhhh not quite sure who would be interested in being tagged here, so I’m going to tentatively tag the folks who’ve shown interest in this ‘verse: @jezifster @dr-runs-with-scissors @emotionalsupportpuma @skitzo-kero @chaotic-queer-disaster @albatris

If any of y’all don’t want to be tagged in these, just let me know!!!! I apologize! And feel free to ignore this!

CW: Some discussion of fictional religions, references to torture and unethical human experimentation, depictions of a character smoking.

[Image Description: A picrew of a person named Jackrabbit, showing him from the shoulders up. He has lightly tanned skin covered in freckles, dark shadows under his eyes, green eyes with slit pupils, furry ears like a cat, and long black hair. Jackrabbit is wearing a white sleeveless turtleneck and a grey choker. End ID.]

Jackrabbit - he/him

Jackrabbit is a fixer, a person who travels the ravaged world solving problems and doing odd jobs for people. He is incredibly secretive about his past and, while outwardly friendly and confident, doesn’t allow people to get close to him for the most part. Generally, Jackrabbit tries his best to do good for himself and those around him, but deep down he’s a very sad, bitter man.

Theme: Wayfaring Stranger - The Longest Johns

Fun Fact: Jackrabbit has a pet possum named Car Battery! She’s one of his closest friends and he adores her so much.

[Image Description: A picrew of a person named Leon, showing her from the shoulders up. She has tan skin, dark circles under her eyes, pointed ears, short white hair, blue eyes, and dark scars against her smiling face. Leon is wearing two gold necklaces, a black tank-top, and a brown jacket, and she’s holding a middle finger up. End ID.]

Leon Blackguard - she/her

Leon is Jackrabbit’s best childhood friend who has been searching for him for many years, ever since he disappeared while they were in college. She fought tooth and nail to teach herself magic, and she’s incredibly unique in that her magic is innate. Not in the same way Eve’s is innate, but Leon essentially tricked a powerful entity into giving her power with no strings attached.

Theme: Handlebars - Flobots

Fun Fact: Leon’s hair is naturally dark, but it turned white due to long-term exposure to magic.

[Image Description: A picrew of a person named Howl, showing him from the shoulders up. He has lightly tanned skin, yellow eyes, pointed ears, and long, fluffy white hair. Howl is wearing a black t-shirt and a blue tracksuit jacket, holding a hand to his chest as he smirks. End ID.]

Howl Quicksilver - he/it

Howl is a thief who travels from city to city, using his magic to charm and bamboozle people into giving him whatever he wants. He has a good heart deep down and will do good if push comes to shove, but he covers it up with a roguish sort of charm that he uses to get away with his crimes. He’s also not very smart, but that hasn’t stopped him yet.

Theme: Second Child Restless Child - The Oh Hellos

Fun Fact: Howl is a proud atheist. While there is undeniable proof of powerful entities existing, he doesn’t view them as gods, and he certainly doesn’t serve any of them.

[Image Description: A picrew of a person named Eve, showing them from the shoulders up. Eve has dark brown skin, dark shaggy hair, scars around their throat, and bright red eyes the same color as bright red markings on their face. They are wearing a red dress and a black coat, and they are holding up one hand in a peace sign. End ID.]

Eve - they/them

Eve is the result of experiments by a sect of Lunists seeking to revive the dead gods. They’re extremely bitter towards humanity and have a lot of distrust for people after all they’ve been through, but they’re very loyal to the few who have managed to earn their trust. Their magic is extremely powerful and they are a rare case of someone having innate magical abilities.

Theme: She Doesn’t Sleep - Anthony Amorim

Fun Fact: Eve was created to be strong enough to potentially kill a god! Are they actually powerful enough to do that? Good question.

[Image Description: A picrew of a person named Van, showing them from the shoulders up. They have long, shaggy blond hair covering the right side of their face, green eyes, and pale skin covered in freckles. Van is wearing a black sleeveless turtleneck and holding one hand up, which is covered in bandages. End ID.]

Van Novak - they/them

Van is a tinkerer, essentially a mechanic knowledgeable in the inner workings of much of the limited technology available in this world. They live in the city of Jericho with their boyfriend Gem, though they occasionally travel outside of the city for supplies. Generally, Van is very rude and confrontational, and they show their soft side only to Gem and (some) of their many siblings.

Theme: Build A Bitch - Bella Poarch

Fun Fact: Van has a personal history with the founder of Vastationism, Prometheus. They know where he went when he disappeared, but they aren’t exactly keen to share this information.

[Image Description: A picrew of a person named Delano, showing him from the shoulders up. Delano has brown skin and dark freckles, long pointed ears, narrow green eyes, and long brown hair. Delano is wearing a black turtleneck and a green cloak. He has a pouty expression on his face and his hands are held up like claws. End ID.]

Delano - he/they/it

Delano is a mage living deep in the swamps in the southeastern United States. Incredibly shy and reclusive, he dislikes interacting with people and tries his best to avoid them entirely. Still, people often seek him out because he’s an incredible healer, and he reluctantly offers his services to anyone in need. Just as long as they don’t stick around him too long.

Theme: The Hand That Feeds - The Crane Wives

Fun Fact: When Delano was a kid, he wanted to be a famous fixer who would help everyone with their problems. Now he’s an adult and doesn’t want anyone to talk to him ever.

[Image Description: A picrew of a person named Gaia, showing them from the shoulders up. They have dark skin and black hair pulled up into a high ponytail, narrow purple eyes, round glasses, and a sneer on their face. Gaia is wearing a nice white button-up and a black jacket, and in their left hand they are holding a pen. End ID.]

Dr. Gaia Divita - they/she

Gaia is a former Lunist who worked at a facility in the city of Luna itself, trying to revive the ancient gods to slay the imposters. As time went on, however, they began to turn against their fellow researchers, eventually coming to take a public stand against Lunism and its goals. Unfortunately, Lunist officials were quick to retaliate, and Gaia was stripped of their status and title. Now, they’re on the run trying to escape their past.

Theme: BLOODMONEY - Poppy

Fun Fact: Gaia actually has no magic of their own, and for many years they were a skeptic in many ways that it even exists.

[Image Description: A picrew of a person named Mihael, showing him from the shoulders up. He has pale, freckled skin, shaggy red hair, pointed ears, and wide yellow eyes. Mihael is wearing a grey t-shirt, a green button-up, and a dark green jacket with a furry collar. His left hand is holding a cigarette. End ID.]

Mihael Kozlov - he/him

Mihael is a fixer who has recently settled in the city of Luna, living with his sister and her wife. However, after meeting Gaia and helping them escape the Lunist facility, he’s gone on the run and is now dedicating his time to keeping them safe. His motives aren’t exactly pure (they promised to pay him handsomely if he’ll keep them safe), but over time he’s slowly becoming attached to them. A little bit.

Theme: Hope Less Romantics - Makeout Monday

Fun Fact: Mihael’s magic is rather weak when compared to other mages and fixers, but he makes it work. He uses his magic to augment his physical strength and ability in combat rather than as its own separate thing.

#multi makes text posts #magic apocalyptica #writeblr #character intros #kinda.... i suppose #maybe someday i'll finish the lore presentation for this 'verse that just goes over the worldbuilding #i've been kinda self conscious about it but. no fuck it i AM gonna make an absurd amount of lore for this #only some of which is relevant for these characters specifically

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greymouse42 · 2 years

Note

For the FE3H question list:)

4,5,6,9,14,15,38,40,41

If that's too many you don't haveta do them all just the ones that interest you the most.

Thank you for all the questions!! I had a lot of fun! 🥰 Answers are beneath the readmore!

4. ✨ Which route did you play through first in FE3H?

Golden Deer!! Fear the Deer!! (FE3H was the first fire emblem I really got into, fandom-wise, since Shadow Dragon)

5. ✨ Which route did you play through last?

Azure Moon orz

I still technically haven't played that one, I've just watched my partner play it... But Azure Gleam in 3Hopes was my favorite route, so I kinda wanna go back and play AM on my own now...

6. ✨ Which route is your favorite?

Toss-up between GD, which I am sentimental about and I think has the best standalone no-additional-context-needed story, and SS, which lets me side with the cool dragon people and I thought was a really fun/interesting narrative foil to BE (also... Seteth fulfilling the role of lord retainer... I am a simple person)

9. ✨ What is your favorite scene in the game (can be in the main story or a support convo)?

It's not very interesting but Chapter 6 and Chapter 9 were my favorites. I didn't know enough to expect that Jeralt's days were numbered so when he died, and when we got to see this unemotional/silent protagonist actually grieving him, I just got really invested.

Also, re: chapter 6, Seteth is A Wreck and I like that in a man. I also really like the white dragon scarf event and I like that the events in that chapter only become more insidious the more context you have.

14. ✨ If you’ve posted your own fanart or fanfic, post a link to the piece you are most proud of.

Oddly, it's this one!! (Setleth Rhondos Coast retelling, with some added emotions) I just think it holds up really well!!

15. ✨ If you are an artist or writer, are you currently working on any new FE3H content (art or fanfic)? If so, will you share a sneak preview?

I've had horrible writer's block lately... 🥺👉👈 But I do have this silly idea that just boils down to "Rhea knows Seteth is sleeping with someone and is giving him shit for it" that I come back to whenever I want to laugh. Here's a snippet:

I just love Rhea when she's allowed to be a little obnoxious...

38. ✨ Who is your favorite teatime companion?

Seteth... obviously. 😅 I just like how multifaceted he and Rhea turn out to be, and his teatime lines are just really... sweet. I also unironically love inviting Hubert to tea heheh, he's so dramatic I love him.

40. ✨ What character do you always recruit, no matter which route you are playing and why?

Seteth is an auto-recruit sooo... Lorenz and Ferdinand!! Look, I KNOW Lorenz is a disaster but I love his character development no matter what route he's on, and I like making him a dark knight. Ferdinand I recruit mostly to be a good influence on Lorenz, and also because I think he's such a strong personality that he adds narrative interest no matter what route you're doing (he's either throwing everything he has into helping the Empire or he's throwing everything he has into opposing it, and I think both sides are interesting).

41. ✨ What is a favorite character headcanon (can be one you came up with or one you liked / adopted from someone else)?

With regards to the extra lore we got in Hopes, I like the idea that all the Nabateans' hair used to be lighter/blonder when they were in close proximity to the Goddess. I would kill for more art/writing 👏 exploring 👏 that!

I also headcanon a religious schism between Rhea & Seteth where she is of the belief that the Goddess isn't dead and could possibly return at any moment, and he (at least up until the events of the game) thinks that the Goddess is definitely dead and gone. It's subtle, but it adds some extra interest for me.

I ALSO really like that one crack theory I've seen floating around that Kronya and Ferdinand are somehow related. What this means for the story, I have no idea, I just think it's neat :)

#fire emblem

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thewhitefluffyhat · 2 years

Text

Day Two

[This is the third part of a collected liveblog/analysis of Nona the Ninth! See here for the other parts.]

In this section, I fixate on character names and other weird worldbuilding details!

Chapter 7

-Yup, so Nona is also the one dreaming. And it appears that John is seeing Nona-in-Harrowbod, hence the conflation!

Guessing we’ll get one of these whenever Nona sleeps, so in between each day.

[Later me: Wow, past me sure was confidently wrong here!]

-The weird thing is that the dreams Nona described to Cam are nothing like the chapters we just read…

-Oh? Red eyes in the darkness - those are from Harrow’s skeletons guarding the pool. So yes, this is very likely the pool scene.

-p80 And here is the infamous cheeseburger t-shirt!

-p82 - We Suffer doesn’t like Pyrrha because she makes them think of God being a man? That’s a confusing one. Was We Suffer a House defector? Why would she care about John-as-God? Surely the BOE doesn’t think of him in those terms.

-I really need to start taking notes on who calls who what. Pal and Pyrrha are mostly on last name basis. Pal uses Cam for Camilla. That kind of thing.

[Later me: as a side note - for Japanese media fandoms, which I’m most familiar with, I’ve often made extensive tables and lists to keep track of which honorifics different characters use for each other when writing fanfic. And writing TLT actually feels surprisingly similar - the characters usually have at least 4+ different ways of referring to each other. First name, last name, House affiliation, House-specific title, and potentially multiple nicknames which they are only called by certain characters in certain circumstances. Like, does Harrow use “Griddle” for Gideon while in public? Is it generally accepted to refer to Coronabeth as “Corona” to her face? These are the kinds of nuances that keep me up at night!

If I ever undertake a full series re-read project, I am legitimately considering making an extensive spreadsheet to keep track of all the combinatorics…]

-p84 - Ah, so here we’re again getting into the question of brain meat. Seems like Cam and Pal can’t last like what they’re doing.

Interesting to hear more about the Transference trial from Pyrrha’s side! Sounds like that could also have been something that killed Gideon by accident, like the Avulsion trial. Whoopsie.

-p86 Huh! According to Pyrrha, the Ninth was settled (and grim) even before Anastasia arrived. Another note to add to the timeline!

-p93 People with white/no eyes in a cargo trawler, that all look up at the same time, hm? I’m not even sure what that could be. Possibly necromancy of a sort? Perhaps they were constructs?

-p94 One of the big mysteries of the book appears to be “what is the Convoy.” Pyrrha knows what a normal convoy is, but this seems to be something else, something bigger that the kids don’t have the right word for.

[Later me: That being said, apart from “who/what is Nona?” - something that can be guessed even before reading the story - this book is surprisingly absent of (murder) mysteries and intrigue. It’s yet another aspect that sets it apart from GtN and HtN. I personally love mysteries, so I did miss it, but I’m sure lots of people feel the opposite!]

Chapter 8

-Noodle is a Good Dog (even when wriggling out of his shoes) and Nona’s fake conversation is... exactly what I would expect from her, so I really don’t have anything to say about this chapter? It is a very short chapter!

I am still very curious what Crown’s deal is, but it feels like something the narrative will eventually answer more clearly.

John 15:23

-Perhaps the numbers are the time on a military clock when the chapter takes place? But the chapters often skim over quite a bit of time…

-p98 - I’d been wondering about that! Gideon/John’s gold eyes are just barely possible in real life, if we’re assuming the descriptions are a bit of poetic license. But apparently the gold description is not an exaggeration - they’re outright supernatural.

-Oh my god. I was not expecting an outright Twilight reference in THESE books. Wow.

-p101 So John’s dead bodies were Ulysses and his cav. T-? Unlike Nigella, I can’t remember her name. It was also a literature reference I believe?

”Their old names” - Oho. Incontrovertible confirmation that characters’ names were different back in the old world, and John changed them to be what they were post-Resurrection!

Like, it often feels slightly dissonant to me whenever I read Modern AU fanfics and the character names are the exact same as in the books. Mercymorns and Augustines and Harrowharks all passing without comment. On the other hand, “translating” the book names into “modern English conventions” would probably come across even weirder - I imagine it would end up sounding like old, bad anime dubs, super awkward and shoehorned. And no two authors would ever use the same names, haha.

Still, while I wouldn’t ever use them in anything, they sure seem fun to speculate about. What were the OG Lyctor’s original names back in the modern world?

-Lots of details of John’s life in the old world! His Nan and his dog.

Weird to think about how half of Gideon’s closest relatives have been dead for 10,000 years...

-Huhh. So early John can move bodies remotely. That sounds more like normal necromancy than his unique God powers.

Chapter 9

-p106 So Nona can swim? I assume CamPal taught her. (I’ve been meaning to look up whether Gideon knew how, I’m sure it must have come up but I can’t remember... so this might be a clue to Nona’s identity and I’m missing it.)

-106 Of course, BOE would destroy corpse bones and graveyards, can’t leave ammo for necros!

-108 Does Nona’s love of saltwater derive from the Pool Scene? Here, it reads as if that might be what’s going on. Though given the way saltwater tends to come up in a lot of significant places, I suspect Nona is conflating the Pool Scene with something else (perhaps even her tomb as Alecto?).

-p110 So the Empire’s language is just called “House.” As in, “speak House.” Fair enough. It’s not like the word “English” has meaning anymore. Though given John’s origins, I assume it really is supposed to be modern English that everyone speaks - there’s no implicit translation convention going on.

-p111 Ooooh. So CamPal can be in the same body at the same time. And Lyctor heterochromia! Fanficers and fanartists must be happy~

-p112 Huhhh. Nona calls the CamPal hybrid a “new person.” A new person like herself? Maybe there is some of Gideon-and-Harrow in her after all…

-113 Hm. So when the CamPal hybrid uses necromancy, it results in blood sweat. Odd. Would have thought a Lyctor wouldn’t bleed anymore.

Oh? Or are they *not* Lyctors, and this was them going slightly down the Eightfold path?

Yeah, Pyrrha’s reaction makes me really think the latter.

Chapter 10

-It occurs to me that Nona’s vanity might be Gideon’s vanity without the baggage of Gideon and Harrow’s weird relationship influencing her opinions of Harrow’s appearance.

-p118 Heh, now that’s a thought! What would Gideon and Harrow think of Nona’s gang of kids? I agree with Cam’s read, I think. Gideon would love them. Harrow… hmm, maybe.

More specifically, I imagine Harrow wouldn’t like them at all, but she’d still feel compelled to protect them to some degree due to her sense of guilt.

-p118 …space elevator… *continues scribbling notes on TLT tech*

-p120 Pal has worked on a Lyctor body before? Is he referring to Cyth?

-p121 And here we get a bit more worldbuilding on reproduction in the Nine Houses. Apparently the Sixth doesn’t even do pregnancy except for research! Can I move there, please? America sucks.

Meanwhile, from backstory details I think it’s implied that the Second (Judith was born interstellar, and why would anyone take a vat interstellar?) and Ninth (Harrow’s parents’ difficulties) still do births the old fashioned way. The Third is ambiguous - I guess there’s nothing preventing Ianthe from almost dying in a vat womb same as a normal one. The Fourth definitely uses vats (which we knew from Isaac). And there’s no data on the Fifth, Seventh, or Eighth that I know of. Though the level of genetic engineering present in Silas and Colum’s backstory makes me think the Eighth might use them too.

-p122 Oooh. Confirmation. CamPal aren’t a full Lyctor, not at all. They’ve just done part of the theorem. Enough to change their eye colors and share a body, but it seems little more.

-p122 Okay, yeah, so it was as I thought with the cages. They burn necros - or people they think are necros - alive. Yeesh, even the fanfics don’t go that hard, but it checks out quite well with what the materials at the end of HtN suggest about BOE’s hatred of necromancy.

Also - given the burning, and the way the mob probably doesn’t even have real necros, I imagine the similarities with suspected witches or heretics being burned at stake is quite intentional.

Like, “necromancy is witchcraft” has always been an undercurrent - Harrow is a bone witch, after all - but this is the most on the nose the connection has been to historical witchcraft, rather than fantasy mages and wizards and whatnot.

-Oooh, so Pal is so worried because he thinks the victims might be Sixth House people. Yikes, what a quandary.

Aw. And for Pal, it isn’t even about that, or about them being Sixth House at all. Three people being burnt to death is horrible regardless of who they are.

In a series full of terrible people, Cam and Pal are often acting as the moral compass, aren’t they?

-p123 Oh hey, Cam has a half-sister ten years older named Kiki! She can join Abigail’s brother in canon relations everyone always forgets about, heh.

-p125 Well, even if I was wrong about the Angel, I was right about Nona having a special connection to the RB! (And it is called “Varun.”)

-p125 “I don’t let go,” said Camilla. “It’s my one thing.” (yesss, we stan a determinator queen <3)

John 5:18

-p128 Oh good, other religions at least still existed in the old world. Interesting that Mercy was atheist but friends with a nun. Maybe Cristabel was the nun? And resurrected Mercy went on to found the Eighth… she’s a woman of many contradictions.

-p129 Two scientists (A- and M-?) an engineer (G-?) and a detective (P-) and a lawyer (C-) and an artist (N-). Or at least I think that’s the right name-to-job matching.

-p129 pffhahaha so they just streamed it? Wow.

Also lol the dig at the internet. Also confirmation that the Nine Houses don’t have it!

They do seem to have some electronic communication, given Judith’s signal for help. But I’ve always wondered about things like Cam, Pal, and Dulcie’s letters. Do they just enjoy writing letters? Or is there truly nothing comparable to personal computers and email?

Quick Thoughts

-It was at this point that following an afternoon of reading, I had to go eat dinner. As good a time as any to pause for some general thoughts!

-I’m surprised at how little we’re getting of everything else going on! Presumably Judith and Corona are off doing things, but we don’t even know what happened to them! -We also don’t have any of John and Ianthe’s side of things. Do I miss Ianthe? Maybe a little, ha.

-Opinion so far: As usual, Muir’s writing is a delight to read despite the incredibly bleak subject matter. My general thoughts on the series are unchanged - I haven’t found anything to dislike, but I also have yet to find anything that immediately grabs me the way the other books did. Nothing new that makes me want to jump up and recommend this series to everyone I know.

But it’s still very early in the story!

Day Three >>

#the locked tomb #nona the ninth #ntn spoilers #tlt analysis #my ramblings #my tlt stuff #read more #thoughts on ntn

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