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#the stuffs on my pinboard fell down
dearrosaceae · 8 months
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It is almost one week since we sent my sister to her university in another state. She is the first in the family to travel outside of our state for studies so my parents had a different level of worry as compared to when they sent me away.
I've always felt unsettled since she was preparing to further her studies. I get that during the before, during and after period of her venturing to a new path, obviously my parents will prioritize her needs and wants above all else. However deep down, my abandonment issues were broiling, still do. I was cast aside to provide bigger space for her.
I tried to be as empathetic and understanding as I could as I gave them space to sort it out because I knew my presence would not help much. It went on for a month or so, until the day she registered. I helped with what I could, with what I know since we shared the same university but different branches. I still had that feeling but I tried to contain it as much as I could. I did not want to make my parents feel like they had to choose.
After leaving her, I started to feel more... unsettled. My parents had only fixated their attention on her. Keeping up with her orientation, already planning to visit her. I get it, she now lives far away but hey, I'm getting into university too. Next week, in fact. They did ask if I needed anything but they knew not much. I said I needed to buy some groceries and I wanna cook. We haven't planned to buy any groceries yet so is it even gonna happen?
I'm trying to be reflective. Maybe there had been a time where the spotlight had been on me and my siblings just watched me shone. Had there? Maybe they didn't even care that I hog them? My sister did say once that my parents seemed to spoil me but I said otherwise. I believed the context was different though. Our perspectives were not relative to one another.
Then my mind just travelled back to the days when I was still in secondary school. My sister was in the same school as well. We were active, participating in many competitions but we did not run into each other as we partake in different fields. Though, my sister was recognized more as she was athletic. I won numerous awards too, but my parents couldn't even point out one. When I riddled them that and they couldn't answer, I knew they don't give a fuck.
I don't know if it's the same case. I mean, my sister just started her education right? Obviously they are worried about her wellbeing. I don't remember if they were as worried with me when I first started but I don't like it that I'm not given the same amount of attention and affection just because I live near. I'm furthering my education too so what the fuck?
All of these finally erupted when my dad skipped my favor over my sister in the family group chat. I asked him if I could bring the three-tier food trolley with me to my rented house tomorrow so I can store food, but he ignored me and responded to my sister after she said that she wants to skip English lessons by taking an APT exam (she has to pay money to take that exam btw).
I don't care if I sound entitled. I don't care if I sound whiny. I don't care if I sound like a crybaby who is so fucking needy. I had enough of being casted aside.
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canary3d-obsessed · 5 months
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Restless Rewatch: The Untamed, Episode 40 part one
(Masterpost) (Pinboard)  (whole thing on AO3)
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Warning! Spoilers for All 50 Episodes!
Agree to Disagree
The juniors are arguing because Sizhui said that some demonic cultivators might have good intentions. According to Jin Ling that means that Sizhui is celebrating the murders of Jin Ling's parents, or something.
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(Actor) Peixin Qi uses forehead-squinching as a primary acting tool, which would be perfectly fine if he wasn't playing a character with a red dot between his eyebrows.
He goes on to say that Wei Wuxian is the evillest of them all, way eviller than Xue Yang. Which in sheer numbers of victims, is probably a fair point. But Xue Yang was way more of a dick.
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Ouyang Zichen is all of us when he asks Jin Ling to chill the fuck out.
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Sizhui apologizes even though Jingyi is ready to throw down on his behalf. It's unclear if this helps, because Hanguang-Jun chooses this moment to arrive. He immediately defuses the situation with the power of stinkeye.
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(more after the cut!)
More Than Meets the Eye
Many differences between CQL and the novel are adaptational choices - Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji's deep, early friendship; the yin iron plot, Jiang Cheng being loveable, etc. Changes like that, I normally don't point out, because adaptations are AUs, in my view, and can be enjoyed separately from their sources.
Other changes are driven by censorship, however, and in those cases I think it's fair to look to the novel and its less-censored adaptations for a peek at what's happening off camera. Particularly when there are scenes and interactions in The Untamed where the show seems to be deliberately pointing to the novel to fill in the blanks.
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This moment on the stairs is one such scene. In the show, Lan Wangji carries liquor upstairs to Wei Wuxian, and the juniors react with shock; Jingyi drops his chicken out of his mouth and Sizhui stuffs it back in there.
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They are shocked because he bought liquor, and that's the extent of their reaction.
In the Donghua, Manhua, and Novel, Lan Wangji is dragging Wei Wuxian up those stairs, having drunkenly tied him up with his headband.
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First he stops to show his prize to the juniors, who have basically the same reaction in every version of the story, including Jinygi dropping his chicken and Sizhui stuffing it back in his mouth. In the novel, however, Sizhui does that to stop Jingyi from saying anything to Lan Wangji & his captive.
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The liquor, in all versions, is a clear sign of how much Lan Wangji has mellowed since his youth. In case we need another reminder, we learn here that he let Sizhui get a tattoo on his finger.
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Every parent will tell you, you gotta pick your battles.
Returning to to the timeline in which no visible bondage is occurring, Wei Wuxian is sitting around in the room upstairs waiting for Lan Wangji. Wasn't he busy talking to Lan Xichen when Lan Wangji went into the inn to shut the kids up? How did he get upstairs before Lan Wangji? Never mind, never mind.
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Wei Wuxian goes to look out the window and Wen Ning appears, hanging off the roof like a dork, or like someone who has seen that one Spider-Man movie and is hoping for some upside-down kissing.
Wen Ning asks if Jin Ling is the kid he halfway orphaned, and Wei Wuxian says yes.
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Then he hears Lan Wangji coming, and Wen Ning falls to the ground for no reason.
Wei Wuxian urgently shoos Wen Ning away, trying to hide him from Lan Wangji.
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Wen Ning acts way too clueless for someone who spends so much time third-wheeling.
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There's no in-world reason for Wei Wuxian to hide Wen Ning; They fought side-by side in Yi City, and they were all together for A-Qing's burial. There's not a problem between him and Lan Wangji.
Once again, the novel provides the missing information. Wei Wuxian is hiding Wen Ning because Lan Wangji is hella jealous even when he's sober. Wen Ning fell to the ground because drunk Lan Wangji leapt through the window and kicked him.
In the novel, Wei Wuxian & Lan Wangji's evening ends with a game of tag that's loaded with sexual tension, followed by a kiss...followed by Lan Wangji literally knocking himself out to avoid taking advantage of Wei Wuxian.
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Lan Wangji does everything in the most extreme way possible.
In the live action, the most sexually charged part of their interaction is this positively sinful hip thrust that Wei Wuxian gives when he turns around at the window.
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If you've seen Xiao Zhan dancing, you know this is not an accident.
Unlike the novel's perpetually clueless protagonist, live-action Wei Wuxian clearly knows he's on a date right now.
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...and he's enjoying every minute of it. He's delighted that Lan Wangji has provided *good* liquor, rather than the rotgut he's able to afford himself.
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As he pours for Wei Wuxian, Lan Wangji points out that both of their brothers know who WWX is at this point. Wei Wuxian isn't happy about it but he says they can't do anything. Which is...not correct.
He tries once again to get Lan Wangji to tell him how he recognized him, and Lan Wangji responds by asking him why his memory sucks so much.
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Wei Wuxian says "you try dying by falling from a great height TWICE and see how your brain likes it." That's what he should have said, anyway.
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This whole thing about his memory isn't actually important in the live action, even though it keeps being mentioned. He's forgotten the name of their song because he was delirious when he heard it; otherwise his memory seems perfectly fine.
I think this might be another instance of the live action giving a wink to novel readers in the audience, because in the novel Wei Wuxian forgot Lan Wangji's confession of love. Which, like WangXian, was presented in a cave while WWX was delirious; Lan Wangji is not great at choosing his moment.
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Anyway, this may be why Lan Wangji seems to take Wei Wuxian's memory problems personally, despite having very little in-show reason to be upset.
Lan Wangji changes the subject by asking Wei Wuxian to go to Jinlintai with him, to search for Nie Mingjue's head. Sounds like a perfect romantic getaway for a boy and his favorite necromancer.
Just as Wei Wuxian starts to ask what Zewu-Jun will think, Zewu-Jun and his cheekbones come into the room.
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He's taken time to think things over--a concept the rest of the cultivation world could stand to learn about, incidentally--and he agrees that they should investigate.
Note: the non-CQL illustrations come from the MDZS manhua, which is complete online (mangadex.org includes the uncensored extra bits), and is about halfway through being published in English by Seven Seas. It's delightful and I highly recommend it.
Bonus: Lan Wangji and Sizhui enjoying some tie-in cup noodles. (A few in-character ads are included in the Viki version of the show.)
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bapyess1r · 4 years
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Amphetamine
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WARNINGS: use of substance, alcohol, difference in ages, cursing
INTRO
“Florida fucking sucks….” Marcel stated plainly, taking a long drag of his joint, holding out for me to take. He rubbed his calloused fingers over his close cut hair before gently gliding them over the strings of the bass in his lap. I could hear the static in the speaker and a singular fat bass note. I ash my cigarette in the dirty crystal ashtray before picking up the joint for a small hit, immediately passing it to the piano player, Jules. She played a few random chords and took a sip from her wine glass.
“I think you just miss your boyfriend.” She chuckled taking a long drag from the shared joint.
“T.B.H so do I….” Our drummer Louie whined, letting a stick hit the snare with no particular rhythm whatsoever. I was confused...as hell.
“I’m sorry- boyfriend?” I said in a shocked tone.
“Shut up guys- Talia. I am NOT- capital N. O. T- gay. He’s like my best friend and he’s away on a job.” Marcel retorted, defensively.
“Aye, I don’t judge.” I smirked.
“It’s nice that he left you the keys to the house so we could keep practicing in his absence though.” Louie said, standing up to add to the rotation of the smoke sesh. He took several puffs and held it in before passing it back to Marcel.
“THIS ISNT EVEN- this isn’t even your house??” I noticed how loudly I was speaking suddenly and hushed my voice trying my best to not annoy the neighbors anymore than we already had.
“Our guitarist we told you about. Sam Drake? He plays with us on his downtime when he’s not being Dora.” Jules said, filling me in as the men in our group chose not to elaborate. I pursed my lips to suppress what I thought was about to be the ugliest giggle and took a drag from my cigarette, looking out at the moonlit sky reflecting off the ocean behind the gating. Our neighbors boats rocking gently on the waves. “When do you think he’ll be back?” She asked.
“Honestly I don’t know. Anytime he leaves out for a job he’s gone for like a month or two.” Marcel replied, staring at the ceiling, performing his scales.
“Yo one time he was gone longer than that- like four months- and I thought something shitty happened to him.” Louie said, taking a sip of his beer.
“I remember that. I got a bad feeling and actually went to church for once to pray about it.” Jules sighed, taking a big gulp of her wine. I could tell it really worried the group when he left.
“How long has he been gone?” I asked, being new to the band and the neighborhood.
“Close to a month I think. I heard him mention something about this job not being as big as usual. Simple run.” Louie answered.
“What the hell does this guy do anyways?” I asked. I was genuinely curious.
“He says he’s a travelling historian and treasurer.” Marcel huffed.
“See… Dora the Explorer.” Jules nudged me in the ribs and I snorted lightly.
“I can’t wait till he hears you sing when he gets back though. He’s gonna lose shit. Black Velvet is gonna make him weak.” Marcel cheesed ridiculously as I blushed faintly at his compliment. The bud was definitely hitting him hard. ‘Lightweight.’ I thought with a turn of my lips.
As the blunt came my way once more, I took the final drag of my cigarette and tossed it somewhere random. I accepted the joint and sat on the speaker facing the group, the close quarters of the garage becoming smokey. “Speaking of, when’s the next time we play?”
“We perform every weekend from the garage for the neighborhood actually. All the old leather skinned white men and their wives come out beer and wine drunk and dance terribly.” He replied with a smirk.
“It’s AWESOME!” Louie added with a contagious goofy laugh. I looked at the bottle of whiskey and huffed, holding it up for everyone to see.
“You’re outta booze. Also I gotta pee.” I announced unnecessarily.
“Just grab a bottle outta freezer. And the bathroom is the first door on your right.” Marcel nodded his head in the direction of the keys that sat atop the heavy duty toolbox.
“Are you sure he won’t mind?” I asked. I just wanted to be safe.
“If he does, I’ll buy him a few rounds and a new bottle.” he answered nonchalantly.
“Okaaay….” I mouthed to myself as I maneuvered my way through the crowded garage, reaching for the keys.
  I walked up the wooden steps and opened the door to a dark room. The faint scent of old cigarette smoke and cologne creeping through my nostrils. A wall of books from ceiling to floor appeared in the moonlight. Immediately my curiosity peaked but the slight sting in my bladder told me to go before anything else. I noticed the frames lining the hallway contained what looked like really old maps. ‘Madagascar, huh?’ I thought as I shuffled into the bathroom to quickly relieve myself. Afterwards, I very quickly washed my hands so I could grab the whiskey from the freezer in the kitchen when I tripped over something really hard. I squeaked in pain when I looked down to see a large oxygen tank like the kind they used to do deep sea diving. I shook it off but my toe still felt a bit sore. It could've been worse had I not been wearing boots. So onward to the kitchen I went, looking down now and then to make sure I didn’t trip over anything else. The space was built just like my Godfather’s across the street so it was easy to find. HOWEVER! As hard as I tried to not pay attention to the things in the living room, it was to no avail. I mean he wasn’t home so what harm could I really do? After a few seconds of a mental argument with Me, Myself, and I, I made a decision. “Fuck it. I’m doin’ it.” I muttered to myself as I slammed the freezer door closed. That’s when I noticed the square polaroid on the fridge of two children in a shogun helmet and a safari hat. ‘Maybe they’re his…’ I thought.
  I followed the glass window to the wall of books and in between them what looked to be some strange artifacts. A skull with a corny pirates patch on it was being used as a bookend and I chuckled. “Cute.” I glanced around the living room and noticed the small box tv sitting ridiculously close to the couch and a few old gaming consoles and low and behold.... “Is that a goddamn VCR player???” I whispered to myself with a judgey scoff.  ‘Jesus he needs an update…’ Not that they weren’t great systems but damn… On the coffee table were a few empty cigarette cartons and empty bottles of beer, a bit of ash dragged across it. A tall surfboard was stood in a corner by its lonesome. The walls were adorned with a couple of interesting things: an old liferaft, mounted pirate swords, some pictures of a group of people holding guns and stuff. “Kay...so he’s a tad obsessed with pirates…” On another wall was a mounted blue electric guitar and a beautiful oakwood acoustic. I ran my fingers across the strings as they made an odd sound. “Tune that shit man… well I guess he can't…” ‘He’s not home…’ There was also a massive map of the world posted on a pinboard with hundreds of tiny colorful pins sporadically placed. ‘Did he really go to all these places?’ I stared at it for a moment in sheer wonder before I brought my attention back to the book wall before me, the whiskey bottle in my hand beginning to sweat. My eyes widened at the titles as my fingers brushed the spines of each one, stopping when I reached an old globe. I drug my fingers across it, causing it to spin a little. I stopped on an encyclopedia of pirates and gently pulled it out. Tucking the wet bottle in my arm, I turned its pages. Some names highlighted, cliff notes off to the side of some passages. Some corners of the pages were bent as if to save a place. Honestly, it was amazing. The guy knew so much about-
“What the hell are you doin’?!” A deep irate voice sounded, startling me. The glass bottle fell from my arms shattering to the hardwood floor as I squealed.
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fyrapartnersearch · 4 years
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original, percy jackson, pokemon, avatar, skyrim, fallout ;
I’m AJ! I lost a couple partners in the holiday craze, which is totally fine! Now I’m lookin’ for some RPs to head into the new year. If we had something lined up and things fell off the wagon, no sweat, just message me again and we can get the ball rolling again! :)
  For original settings: apocalyptic (zombie, disease, extinction event, whatever), supernatural (fantasy, urban, sci-fi, literally anything). For fandom universes: Percy Jackson, Pokemon, Avatar: The Last Airbender/Legend of Korra, Skyrim, and Fallout.
  Gonna run through my basic info and then onto the particulars. 💕
  ⥽ About Me ; ⥼
  • Name/Age ; AJ! 22! Finally!
  • Timezone ; CST! I don’t mind time differences, this is just so you know my general schedule.
  • Length ;  Depends on whether it’s novella or multi-paragraph. If m.para, around 3-5 minimum I guess? Novella would obviously be much longer.
  • Reply rate ; Varies depending on whether we’re doing multi-paragraph or novella. I can respond anywhere from every day to every other day or a few times a week to weekly depending on the writing style of the RP and my schedule.
  • OOC ;  I like getting to know my partners and sharing enthusiasm over our ideas and characters. Nothing hits quite like mutual investment! I like making playlists/pinboards/sending you videos or songs or memes that remind me of our characters!
  • Contact ; Strictly email for OOC and roleplay unless we’re using GDocs for the RP itself. You can find me at [email protected].
  ⥽ On the lookout for ; ⥼
  • Doubling ; Not a deal-breaker!! I just prefer writing a cast of characters, so this is something that’s more of a bonus. Ideally we’ll double, but I’m down for writing just one character each. Let me know how ya feel about it!
  • Will only write MxM or FxF ; MxF’s not my cup of tea (I’m extremely picky with it, fellow gays u know how it is). If we’re writing a cast of characters then I’m fine with having an MxF side couple. And I STRICTLY write OCxOC! Canon characters won't be found anywhere near this stuff, folks!
  • 20+ ; Partner’s gotta be 20+ even if we don’t write anything explicitly adult! I’m outta my teens now and don’t have any interest in writing with them. Same goes for characters. It’s a 20+ zone for both partners and characters ‘round here, folks!
  ⥽ Yes! ; ⥼
  • Smut ;  I enjoy writing it, but it’s not a deal-breaker if you’d rather fade to black.  All characters will obviously be adults. I expect versatile characters in bed by default, that way we’ve got an even route for playing roles in bed. Admittedly this shifts a bit depending on the character I write but for the most part, yeah, I stick to verses.
  • Face claims ; Spent a huge chunk of my roleplaying years on tumblr (it was very over-the-top and flowery and weirdly formatted and grossly difficult to read, I know I know), so having a face for characters stuck with me. If you don’t have any of your own and want good resources to find a face, I’ve got some recommended sites I can throw at ya! Not a deal-breaker, though, and for certain fandoms (Pokemon, Avatar) I actually prefer not to use realistic face claims so we can just opt outta that when writing in these universes.
  • Depth & growth ; Not a fan of one-dimensional characters or characters who act the same from beginning to end! People change with experiences and the people around them, so this is to be expected. ESPECIALLY when doubling with a cast. I loooove complicated characters growing together.
  • Plotting & Worldbuilding ;  *For original settings/worlds! I’m not picky with this if we’re working with a canon setting, so if that’s what you’re looking for, we can skip this section. I run into loooads of folks who say they do this when they really don’t. We’re writing an entire world together, so there’s some degree of effort involved! I need specifics to use as a start-off point for the roleplay and a general outline for where the story’s going. RPs that are just random, spur of the moment with writing as we go on tend to burn out REALLY quickly for me. I know not a lot of people are into this, so I’m sorry about that.
  ⥽ No! ; ⥼
  • Single paragraphs ; I’m not too picky with a lot of length a lot of the time, I just don’t mesh well with people who don’t write more than that. Go ham. I like my responses meaty!
  • Limits ; Abuse, nonconsensual/sexual assault, pedophilia, incest (includes step-relations, adopted relations, and that figurative like if one character essentially raised another or they were raised as family), weird age gaps, BDSM, any kind of master/slave or dom/sub dynamics.
  As for the goods, I’ve laid ‘em all out for you here! Keep in mind that while all of these are fun on their own, I’m definitely the type of writer who’s into mixing and matching. Sci-fi apocalypse? Fantasy apocalypse? Fantasy supernatural stuff? Sci-fi fantasy? Sci-fi supernatural stuff? Supernatural apocalypse? Period settings? Literally whatever you could think of, I’ll give it a whirl. The particulars down below are just to get the ball rolling and catch some interest, some asterisks for current cravings but I’m soooooo honest when I say that I’d love to write anything down below and won’t shoot you down if you come at me with stuff. Hit me up with whatever you’d like!
    APOCALYPSE: My bread and butter! Bro. I’m all about the tense, harrowing, and especially gut-punching when it comes to how close people become to survive together in quiet moments of a world they used to know. I’m a big fan of zombies, so that’s my loose preference. I loved Black Summer on Netflix – the earlier episodes, at least, as well as The Last of Us. That’s the kind of vibe I favor with zombies/zombie-like creatures. But, ofc, an apocalypse can be anything! I love writing different takes on the genre since there’s so much to cover. Extinction event, pandemic, impact event, monsters/beasts, man-made, whatever. The more creative the apocalyptic setting, the better, so I’d love to bounce some ideas back and forth. Not too into a nuclear apocalypse setting, since that overlaps a lot with Fallout down below. I’ve also had some ideas of a futuristic/sci-fi apocalypse that I’d love to tell you all about if you’re interested!
  FANTASY***: High fantasy, low fantasy, medieval fantasy, urban fantasy, whatever. Love dragons, love magic, love weird fantasy flora, definitely love the classic prince/princess x knight or commoner schtick. You want prophecies? I’m game. You want elves? I’m game. You want steampunk? I’m game. You want none of that and wanna do something else? I’m game, baby. The possibilities are endless. I’ve had two particular ideas floatin’ around in my noggin lately: an apocalyptic-fantasy that takes place in a medieval fantasy realm wherein an ancient curse/plague erupts across the land with horrifying zombie-esque symptoms (obv with more fantasy elements than just that) that involves a quest to try and awaken a god or two OR some magic journey to the heart of it all and out and end to it, and a modern fantasy involving a run-down summer camp secluded deep in the woods. Two new counselors (our characters) start working there over the summer and things slowly unravel from there, either with faerie stuff involving replacing campers/staff (definitely aiming for the freaky horror faeries as opposed to like, beautiful or only slightly unnerving faeries) or the camp being run by a secret cult that sacrifices campers/staff.
  SUPERNATURAL/PARANORMAL***: Vampires and werewolves and demons, oh my! Can’t go wrong with horror, especially can’t go wrong with comedy-horror. I’m more of the type to prefer humans and supernatural beings together in a ragtag duo type of way as opposed to two supernatural beings, but anything’s cool in my book. Medieval/fantasy setting for a dark fairytale vibe, urban/modern supernatural beings slinking in the shadows outside of the human eye, supernatural sci-fi stuff, mysteries and danger lurking around every corner? Seriously, it’s a great genre! Any and everything is fantastic. I’ve got a loose concept of demons/the Underworld I’d like to get into revolving around a human accidentally summoning a demon or making a really poor deal with a demon and the eventual threat of the opposite effect (humans who work with angels/angels who clean up demonic stuff) since I’m struggling with the worldbuilding of it, so applying all that to a roleplay to give it a whirl sounds like a great way to work out the kinks. Plus, c’mon. Paranormal romance. End of the world. Flipping the script on angels and demons with the demons being “good” and the angels being “bad” but really there’s more nuance to that since they’re two sides of the same coin. What’s not to love there? I’m a sucker for human/demon relationships and/or human/angel relationships, what can I say!
  PERCY JACKSON*****: I haven’t ever roleplaying this verse before, so this is completely new grounds for me. I’ve seen some fun takes on it, though! Scoured older ads but haven’t reached out to anyone because the posting time’s pretty old, but a couple ideas I’ve skimmed through sound fun. HP got a period take on it, so why not put that spin on PJ with a period setting rather than in modern times? Or just a regular modern setting. Y’know, keep it classy, keep it sexy, keep it fun! I’m definitely interested in life outside of camp since they’d all be adults. Life’s supposed to suck for demigods, so let’s get into that. I’ve only read the first series but I’m game to read more or look over the Wikipedia if it suits your fancy! I’m REALLY looking for a PJ RP, seriously, message me.
  POKEMON: Man, I just… miss Pokemon, dude, what else can I say? :( I miss fun adventures and goofy scenarios and taking a more serious or realistic route with threats. I’ve got a couple of ideas from heists to evil Elite Four members to Poke-Jurassic Park, but I’d love to hear anything you’ve got in mind!
  AVATAR*****: Alright, not gonna beat around the bush, I had a killer post-Korra RP setting like a year ago that died off early on and now I’m kinda itching to put it back into action! Basically this whole thing just revolves around our own Avatar and world/conflicts. Something before Aang could be fun too? Or a couple Avatars past Korra? There’s so many routes we could take this! And so many things we could bring in! I had an Avatar marathon with my brother this weekend and I just miss this universe. I’ve never actually managed to RP it before, so I wanna remedy that!
  FALLOUT***: Played 3, watched various playthroughs of New Vegas, 4, and working on 1+2! I’m a recent fan and I’ve fallen head over heels for it! I’ve got ten prepped OCs for this universe so feel free to take your pic once we get into contact! :D I think it could be fun if we make our own setting for this, but I’m so down for piggybacking off canon settings. I love the Mojave in particular, but everything’s cool in my book. I’ve also got a couple plot ideas, so I can tell you all about ‘em when we get into things!
  SKYRIM***: Well I’m a new Fallout fan so it should come to NO surprise that I’m new to Skyrim too. I recently got into it after someone recommended it to me and I’m having a blast playing the game on the Switch! I don’t have any particular ideas but I’d love to dip into the water here and see what comes of it. I’ve got a couple character ideas already so if I manage to rope anyone into this universe I’ll be one happy camper.
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acciowests · 5 years
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Rosy Cheeks and Fairy Tales - Snaibsel
SUMMARY: After Artemis comes back from a mission, Zatanna decides it's the right time to finally tell her best friend how she really feels.
WORD COUNT: 1645
"Artemis... wait up!"
As Zatanna jogged toward the archer she felt her heart beating against her chest. It had been just over a year since she had met the young hero and she had loved every minute of it. Artemis wasn't like her other friends in "Young Justice", she was... different. It sounded cliche, but Zatanna couldn't stop thinking about her. Oh, the joys of having a crush on your best friend.
Artemis had just gotten back from a mission with Robin and Kid Flash. The sweat rolling down from her forehead and the scrapes across her arms were an obvious sign that the mission hadn't been as 'quick and easy' as she had described before leaving. As Zatanna reached the girl in green, Artemis smiled gently, her body became tense as she breathed heavily from her winded chest. Their eyes met for a second before Zatanna gripped Artemis's arm lightly and began to examine the scrapes across her arms, some of them were sore and bleeding.
" Want me to fix you up? It'll be faster with my magic, y' know" She offered, running her fingers lightly over Artemis's tan skin
The immediate hiss between Artemis's teeth and slight jerk of her arm told Zatanna that the cuts in her arms were stinging. They looked painful, red skin had begun to peel around the thin sharp cuts that decorated themselves along the backs of her forearms. Despite her discomfort, Artemis shook her head and pulled her arm from Zatanna's grip.
"You don't have to worry, I think bandages will work" She chuckled lightly. Zatanna couldn't even begin to think how much she loved that chuckle.
The pair began to walk towards the south corridor - towards where all the girls' rooms were. Zatanna lingered slightly behind, she wanted time to think. Actually, that was a lie, she wanted to talk to Artemis - tell her how she really felt, she could just never find the words. She figured she would start off by saying that she was happy they were friends, or maybe that she was happy they were so close - either way, she was happy just to know her. Speaking of knowing her, Zatanna knew that Artemis definitely was not too keen on gushy, lovey-dovey stuff and that she was bound to find this entire upcoming conversation extremely awkward and uncomfortable. Every single fibre of Zatanna's being hoped that Artemis felt the same way - she wasn't ready to lose her if she didn't.
Artemis had begun limping as they turned the corner towards her room - sprained ankle most likely, Zatanna thought. Upon entering the room, Artemis sat immediately at the end of the bed whilst Zatanna grabbed her first aid kit from the bathroom. Artemis's room was rather big, definitely bigger than Zatanna's - but she didn't mind. Her bed was a double and had a basic green duvet sheet with black pillows. Her room didn't have many personal touches as Artemis only lived there part-time, but the ones she did have were subtle yet important. A three-shelved bookcase stood in the corner overflowing with books, atop of it stood a few fake succulents and a Vietnamese flag on a small stand. The wardrobe was pretty empty but within was a brown leather jacket, as well as a few pairs of blue jeans and a basic white tee. Artemis definitely wasn't one to depend too much on fashion. The main feature in Artemis's room was the gigantic pinboard that decorated the wall behind her bed. On it was photo's from her childhood, ones of her and her sister at the park, or them at home dressed up for Halloween. Zatanna didn't know much about Artemis's sister, just that she was now a well-known criminal and that she left when Artemis was still very young. The board was also filled with happier memories, ones of her and Wally last summer, her and Robin in costume, group photos of Young Justice that M'gann had forced them to take, and ones of her and Zatanna, arms around each other's waist smiling directly into the camera. Zatanna was in awe of every single one of those photos.
Zatanna sat down beside Artemis, gently placing the first aid kit behind her on the bed and grabbing a disinfecting wipe. "You don't have to," insisted Artemis, a rosy flare upon her cheeks.
Zatanna just shook her head lightly, " It's no problem" she smiled, washing over her forearm with the wipe. Artemis gave into the girl beside her and allowed her to continue.
Zatanna had so many things she wanted to say. As time passed and she finished cleaning Artemis up, Zatanna and Artemis ended up laying silently on top of her bed. The only sound in the room was the wind howling through the vent and the sound of them breathing. Zatanna could listen to Artemis breathing for hours - as weird as it sounded, she could. It had taken less than ten minutes to apply the bandaids and bandages to Artemis's arms and for Zatanna to wrap a bandage around her newly swollen ankle. Apparently, Artemis's mission with Kid Flash and Robin was ambushed by a small group of assassins who were focused on not letting the team leave the headquarters they had just broke into - logic. At the end of the day, Zatanna was just happy they had all came home alive. As they laid down, Artemis's hand rested only inches from Zatanna's and all Zatanna wanted to do was intertwine their fingers and have it be... normal.
"Arty... can I tell you something?" Zatanna whispered. Zatanna's heart was pounding as Artemis sat up and turned towards her. She looked restless, her hair fell down beside her face and she rubbed her eye lazily, " sure, are you okay?"
Zatanna nodded, pushing her self up and adjusting herself to sit beside Artemis. This was it. She was going to tell her how she felt, how she truly felt. Where was she even supposed to start, how could she ever find the right words? She'd waited what felt like years to finally tell her about her feelings and she wasn't going to screw up now.
"Ever since I joined Young Justice I've felt... a connection... between you and... you and me" She started, her palms became sweaty and her chest became tight Artemis's eyes became soft as she watched the girl before her confess her feelings. Zatanna couldn't help but notice how mesmerizing those eyes truly were.
"And I can't even remember why, or when, or even how but... I like you, Artemis. Like, I like you like you..." she breathed heavily, looking up to see Artemis looking utterly confused
Great. She had ruined everything. Zatanna could hear her heart beating in her ears, could hear the pounding against her head. She tried to read Artemis's face, tried to guess what she was thinking... but nothing. She had always been hard to read but right now she was impossible.
" And I understand, I know you don't feel the same but... I just wanted you to know, I needed you to know... I just don't want you to hate me because-"
And she stopped. Or was forced to stop, rather.
She had felt it before she knew what was happening, felt the soft touch of lips against her own. Zatanna gently closed her eyes, leaning into the kiss further - Artemis was kissing her. She didn't know what she was expecting, but it most definitely wasn't this. She was having her first kiss, and it was... everything that she was told it was supposed to be, and she was having it with the girl she had the biggest crush on. Perhaps fairy tales are real, after all. Artemis moved her hand up and cupped the side of Zatanna's cheek, running her thumb along her cheekbone. Zatanna couldn't even believe this was happening, her skin began to tingle at her touch. Artemis's lips were soft and they tasted like strawberry lip balm. Despite the calluses on her palms from training, her hand was surprisingly gentle against her face. Slowly Artemis pulled away, taking her hand with her and resting it on Zatanna's thigh. Zatanna truly looked at Artemis for what felt like the first time, traces of Zatanna's lipstick stuck to Artemis's bottom lip and her cheeks were the brightest shade of red she had ever seen them.
" I could never hate you" Artemis smiled, moving her hand and tucking a strand of hair behind her ear
Zatanna couldn't help but notice how effortlessly beautiful she was, how she didn't even have to try and she was naturally the most beautiful girl she had ever seen.
" Why do I feel like I'm home whenever you're near me?" Zatanna expressed, her face only inches from Artemis's. Artemis chuckled, it was light and full of love, she reached across and intertwined her hand with Zatanna's. Zatanna's heartbeat immediately fastened and she wondered if it was obvious how elated she was.
" You're not the only one who feels like that" Artemis smirked, her thumb running over the back of Zatanna's hand
Zatanna didn't know where to go from there, all she knew was that she didn't want to stop being with Artemis in this kind of way. She wanted to feel the touch of her lips again, she wanted to run her fingers through Artemis's long thick hair and she wanted to lay in the dark with her, wanted to spend every minute in her presence as possible. She didn't know if that meant coming out to their friends or keeping their relationship a secret, but either way, she wanted a relationship with her more than anything and she was willing to wait for her if needs be.
Being only sixteen meant she had no clue what love truly meant, but she was hoping she could find it with Artemis.
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fcnna · 5 years
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❝ Even if you are a small forest surviving off of moon alone: your light is extraordinary. ❞ MILENA TSCHARNTKE? No, that’s actually FENNA VAN DEN BERG. A SIXTH YEAR student, this HUFFLEPUFF student is sided with THE NEUTRALS. SHE/THEY identifies as GENDERQUEER and is a MUGGLEBORN who is known to be FICKLE, ESCAPIST and DISTANT, but also ARTISTIC, STEADY and INDEPENDENT.
LINKS: stats, pinboard, character tag. CHARACTER PARALLELS: susanna kaysen (girl, interrupted), chidi anagonye (the good place), pam halpert (the office), riley blue (sense8) HELLO gang, so this is a rewrite/repost of my old intro. fenna is now sixteen, not twenty six, and she’s a puff rather than a beauxbatons graduate. some of this will be the same, some will not! yeet!
history
fenna is born to a dutch family in the city of utrecht as the youngest of three. her family is a rich one --- one of the richest, actually. they’re ambitious and cunning and success and reputation are words that fenna is all too familiar with growing up. there is no room for oddities or rebellion or putting a toe out of line and fenna doesn’t mind. they’re good at rules and doing what is expected and falling in line, anyways. it’s safe. it’s easy.
her father has to go abroad for work. a lot. germany, france, belgium, the uk ... he’s more away from home than he’s not. when the company he works for (or, well, partly owns, really) has a great opportunity to become even more global, he drags his family with him to england, where they settle in manchester. it’s an exciting thing, to move across europe when you’re seven, but a sad one, too. fenna says goodbye to all their friends and teachers and weeps in the car and refuses to learn english.
they do learn, eventually. fenna doesn’t have much of a choice, as they attend muggle private school. and once they know their way around the language, they do well in school. unaware of the fact that they’re a wix, there’s a lot of pressure on their shoulders and they work hard, their focus iron-like, their wish to please their parents great. but in moments of stress, their magic shows --- and fenna is scared of it. fenna does not tell their parents, out of fear of disapproval and raised eyebrows, not wanting to admit that this is something real in the first place. in stead, they get the best grades and play the piano and keep their worries locked in their heart. magic isn’t real.
and yet, the truth comes out one day. fenna is a witch, they’re all told, and it’s a shock. they are to go to a school in scotland and study magic there. it’s a shock. it’s like a bomb goes off in their home. but here’s the thing --- their parents didn’t stop loving them. and yet, something did change in the way she was loved, and fenna -- quiet and observant -- noticed it all too well.
because here’s the thing --- when you’re a witch, you can’t go to one of the top universities in the uk and become a doctor or lawyer or politician, you can’t fill the mold that comes with being a van den berg, you can’t, you can’t, you can’t. and that was what life was all about for fenna up until now, and what it is still all about for their family, and suddenly for them, that was over. so things changed. slowly but surely and eventually disastrously ( but we’re not there yet ).
so fenna was off to this boarding school, with their eyes wide open and their heart hammering. from day one, a wedge started growing between them and their family. whether it was disapproval, insecurities or the distance that forced it, no one really knows --- but it was there, from the beginning, and only grew bigger. meanwhile fenna did find themselves at hogwarts, falling in love with magic and the feeling of control they got when spells went right. the pressure was off from her family ---- what did they care if they succeeded in magic? it’d not mean anything in the muggle world. doing well at hogwarts was something fenna did for themselves and yes, that still made them stressed and anxious and the pressure was still there, but it had lessened, changed.
fenna started sending less owls to home. they and their family grew apart more and while that happened, they found something called independence and that it came quite easily to them. fenna learned what living for themselves was. they learned that, damn it, there were no dreams for great successes in law or politics living inside of them. there was a passion for art, though, for all kinds of it. painting especially, was what they fell in love with.
queerphobia tw / after her fifth year, fenna had grown into an independent, but solitary person. their art had become better, their passions grown bigger, their relationship with their parents as fragile as a bomb. fenna spent the summer at home, trying to see what was wrong, what was happening with them and their parents. in the end, they decided that something was just horribly wrong. their parents were no monsters, but they struggled with fenna’s magic, and their wishes to become an artist, with their gender and sexuality, with everything, really. there were fights. there were disagreements. fenna felt terrible, being home, and longed for the end of summer, for a return to hogwarts, for a place to feel at damn home end of tw
it was just hard, with their family. there was never any real confrontational harsh destruction, never a moment of outspoken disapproval or disappointment. everything was kept in the shadows. in their home, there was no room for honesty, and if there was, it was like a bomb exploding, with everything coming out. it was suffocating. fenna couldn’t do it any more.
i do think that this moment during summer break was significant. it was a push for fenna to grow more serious about their passions. they want to go to art school, want to do what they want to do, because they know that they will never be happy doing what their parents want from them. they’re ready for the world, to chase their dreams --- i mean, it’s utterly terrifying, but fenna is finally daring to think about a future in the arts, rather than a future with more stability, one that fit in the image they always had of their own future.
and then they return to hogwarts and the war breaks out. the war is ... well, it’s fucking terrifying, frankly. fenna is no fighter, they know that. they’re no good with dueling or offensive spells. they’re no good in any of this, frankly ---- fenna craves control in everything in their lives and they dont have that with this war, especially as it does target people like them. for now, they are neutral, cowardly hiding in the shadows. they know that there’s things to do, that there should be things she could do, that she should not hide in fear but --- how do you not do that, if that is your instinct? 
personality & ramblings
meet fenna --- your local tortured artist! sad pal, with a good heart but a lot of insecurities and doubts clouding it. i’m going to try and just summarise their general personality here!!
fenna is first and foremost independent. they don’t rely on anyone but themselves, and like it that way. they don’t feel independent, they feel absolutely bloody lost, but they are. this partly comes from the fact that they like to feel in control and at this point, they do hold a lot of the reigns when it comes to stuff in her life? they also rly like things that are logical because of this, like maths and arithmancy and potions
fenna is ... both incredibly emotional and completely rigid? in their private time, they cry and rage easily, but to the outside world they’re definitely quite composed and rigid. fenna is good at pretense and masks and not showing all that is going on.
as a friend, they’re nurturing and kind and always down for a spontaneous night of shenanigans. doesn’t like DANGER but does like shenanigans.
idk i can go on for forever theyre such a mess
nsfw / fenna’s genderqueer/femme. they use both she/her and they/them pronouns --- it depends on how they’re feeling, but also who they’re with, tbh. they’re pansexual/panromantic and very easy when it comes to sex. puts the ho in art ho! nah but for real they sleep around and they don’t think much of it at all tbh, sex is fun and it relaxes her and it’s a good time for everyone involved / end
oof such a romantic, deep down. just aesthetic wise for sure, but also ... fenna does love like, jane austen and the bronte sisters and old romance novels and shitty romcoms and ahhhh. does believe in true love but ? have they given it a shot? really? not rly. too afraid of it.
also, def has some stereotypical muggleborn stuff going on. never used quills, thinks the wizarding world is a mess always, etc. they also love muggle culture in general and is addicted to netflix tbh. VERY MAD ABOUT THE PHONE BAN! they miss pinterest and netflix big time.
depression & anxiety tw / fenna is depressed & has general anxiety disorder. both are undiagnosed at the moment, as they don’t really . understand that something might be going on, or rather are in denial about it. i mean, to a certain extent they know that something’s not right, but they don’t want to take any steps to find help, because they downplay it Big Time in their mind. the war is definitely contributing to all this. end of tw.
honestly they just want to move the fuck away from this war, either back to the netherlands. they dont! like! this! war.
i could see them joining the MA, somewhere along the line? but rn fenna just. likes sitting in their corner. escaping from this shitty reality. smoking some pot. painting some shit. ignoring the reality of the world. 
ALSO I RLY STRUGGLED W THEIR HOUSE BC LIKE FENNA WOULD DO SO WELL IN RAVENCLAW BUT! I THINK THEY WORK WELL AS A PUFF BC IF YOURE THEIR FRIEND THEY ARE SO LOYAL! AND THEY DONT MIND HARD WORK when its GOOD work and also theyre just. a nice person. 
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mundvngus · 5 years
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“i pour alcohol into the gaping hole inside my chest. it does not heal. not today. maybe tomorrow.”
MUNDUNGUS FLETCHER is 26 years old and works as a THIEF/DRUG DEALER/ALL ROUND CRIMINAL and is loyal to THE OOTP they were an RAVENCLAW and are a HALFBLOODED. HE look like FRANK DILLANE.
CHARACTER PARALLELS: nick miller ( new girl ), creed bratton ( the office ), doug judy ( b99 ), jason mendoza ( the good place ), chris miles ( skins ), jesper fahey ( six of crows ), scott lang ( marvel ), lillian ( unbreakable kimmy schmidt ). AESTHETIC: scuffed knees, flicking a lighter over and over again, flowery shirts, walking in the middle of the street after midnight, a body covered in bruises and tattoos, naming stray cats, falling asleep on the subway, watching smoke curl against a starless, black nightsky, throwing empty beer bottles against a wall. LINKS: stats. pinboard. character tag. HEADS UP: there’s quite a bit of talk about drugs and stuff in here -- as well as shitty parenting. i trigger warned it before every bullet point tho!
history
ciannán o’donnell was a flighty man, one of many relationships and flings and little loyalty, and so his affair with kiyana fletcher did not last long. when she told him he was pregnant, he moved on to a different woman, and kiyana had her son alone, with her sister on her side. dung was born to a lonely and angry woman, who had fallen for the charms and winks of a crooked criminal who spoke empty promises and lied for a living.
he grew up with his mum – a halfblooded witch and by far his favourite person in the world – in cork, attending muggle school there. he knew who his dad was, but wasn’t quite sure how to feel about —- EVERYONE knew who his dad was, a well known muggle criminal and dealer, a name notorious among the older kids at his school, a father to many. he’s like the robert baratheon of ireland, to be honest, planting bastards on every corner. lol. knowing he was one of his many kids was hard; he’d never met any of them, but he knew they were there, from his mother, from his aunt.
he met his dad for the first time at age seven, and was nothing but impressed. his dad showered him with gifts, his mum watching with a furious look on her face but biting her tongue. that moment was a switch for dung; he felt the need to impress his dad. he stole some sweets from a store on his way home from school a week later, fished some pennies out of the pockets of his classmates a few months later. when he phoned his dad to tell him, his laugh was warm and filled with life.
his relationship with his dad got better as his behaviour got worse. the thrill of stealing, of doing stuff he wasn’t supposed to, lit him not only on fire because ti was exciting, but also because he knew his dad would adore it. his mother’s worried questions and look only drove him to his dad, who liked it when he did bad things, who didn’t try and ground him ( looking back, he knows that that was stupid, but back then he was blindsided, obsessed with the mystery that was his dad ).
abuse tw // his father was abusive. period. he’s a wicked man, who has blood on his hands of people who were in his way, and he doesn’t love anything but winning and money and the high of victory. he manipulated mundungus, pushed him towards bad behaviours, showed him his bad sides when he was disappointed. most of the abuse was mental and verbal, but sometimes it turned physical as well. it’s toxic. mundungus hasn’t allowed himself to admit that to himself yet, though. end of tw //
drugs, smoking, alcohol tw // attending hogwarts was good, at first. it forced him to focus on other stuff, for a while, but his summers and winter breaks forced him back into his old behaviours. his world was split; at hogwarts, he was a loud and lively, but still a pretty good student, while at home he fell deeper and deeper in crossing lines and boundaries. he lit his first cigarette at age ten, drank his first beer at age twelve, smoked his first spliff when he turned fourteen, as a present from his dad. end of tws //
hogwarts also meant friends --- the dick squad was founded here, consisting out of dorcas, doc, daisy and dung himself. these three people meant everything to mundungus, to be honest, let him see the ways people could love each other without conditions or out of obligation. they were chaotic and messy and wrecked havoc on the castle but --- damn it, they’re his family, and he’d die for them.
drugs tw // it was in his later years that these two worlds started overlapping. his dad trusted him with a bit of produce, gave him some weed to sell at hogwarts after his christmas break in his fifth year, and it was a success. ever since, dung became pretty well known for selling a little bit of this and that. a lively spirit, he always did so with a bit of a grin, but he was also pretty fond of the stuff he sold, indulging quite a lot when business was a little slow.
he also stole a lot from rich purebloods, because fuck them
i guess ... this is where the messiness really did ... explode? mundungus liked the taste of drugs. he liked the taste of doing illegal things. he liked the taste of earning money and feeling powerful and he loved it all. he grew more dependent on alcohol and drugs. he wanted to flee, too. the world was a nasty fucking place and he knew that all too well and, fucking hell, don’t blame him for wanting to escape every now and then. end of tw //
he graduated at one point which? is a miracle? i think they just wanted to get rid of him tbh!!! but yeah, dung did Try a little at hogwarts, as he respects the hell out of dumbledore and stuff, but he was still not a good student. after graduation, he kind of joined up with his dad and started doing some illegal stuff in the wizarding world too, because why the hell not? he was good at it.
dung had no plans to join either side of the war, tbh, even though he’ss v much against the de’s cause. he’s a self serving kid!! but then he kind of got in a nasty situation where both alastor and dumbledore got him out of trouble ( that might have sent him to fucking azkaban, what a fucking idiot ) and well, dung might be a shithead, but he felt indebted to them and kind of rolled into the order.
and well --- the order was a newfound family. messy, of course, and full of chaos and distrust, but --- heck, mundungus found a lot of people there that he did end up feeling loyal to. and while that was scary, as mundungus prefers being a lone wolf ( or raccoon ), it was a kind of wonderful, too?
and -- get this -- he was an asset. his ties to the criminal world, with his ability to steal and sneak around like less than a shadow. he was useful, and mundungus fletcher had never been useful in his life before. what a weird feeling that was --- oh boy, but it was good, too. mundungus likes it. he could build on that and improve greatly and he has fucking potential to become a better person. he really wants to, too, because he feels incredibly indebted to alastor and dumbledore akjfsdf.
dont hold your breath, tho, he’s probably not going to improve a lot
mundungus doesn’t technically have a home. his mother’s place is his home, i guess, but he’s not there a lot. he crashes on couches, breaks into muggle homes of people who are on vacation ( always leaving it the way it was, but with a bit of a smell ) or in a squatter’s home, which he thinks is an iconic scene.
drugs tw // besides his work for the order, mundungus does a bit of this and that. he still works for his dad a little, dealing some drugs for him, but he’s mostly focused on making his way through the wizarding world’s underground and making a name for himself there. he sees no reason to try and find another career, finds the things he does now thrilling and exciting and honestly, he doesn’t have much of a way out. 
abuse tw // his dad has a hold on him. sure, he can drop his criminal activities in the wizarding world, but when it comes to his dad's business, he’s stuck. his father isn’t going to allow him to walk away –  that much should be obvious. he knows too much. and then there’s mundungus’ wish to always please his father, and his father’s endless dissatisfaction. it’s messy and bad and toxic and we all hate mundungus’ dad. end of tws // 
addiction tw // what it all boils down to is that mundungus is chaotic. he never stays in one place too long, doesn’t have a consistent job, strays away from commitment and stability. he’s addicted, to drugs, alcohol, cigarettes and adrenaline. he’s self serving, in the end. he’s seeking for validation, deep down, and endlessly scared of all that’s happening around him. he’s alone, dreadfully so, but that’s the way he prefers it. end of tw //
personality & tidbits 
mundungus is a lowkey tortured artist. he writes awful poetry and draws a lot and he loves painting if he has time. he’s in love with the beat generation, mostly. he’s very private about this kind of stuff, though. it's his thing, and his alone. some of his tattoos he’s designed himself tho!! and we love and stan!!
his stance in the war is something that’s … pretty unknown, i imagine. mundungus benefits from appearing neutral, has connections in both the pureblood and muggle world. he likes to come across as that shady dude who will do whatever you ask of him for the right price.
can usually be spotted wearing The Coat, a rly expensive, vintage long coat that he once stole of a pureblood. he’s enlarged the pockets with some handy spellwork and pretty much carries everything he owes in there, like his produce and his money and his second pair of shoes and his art supplies and probably some random trash. 
is a bit smelly, so give him a shower
most likely to show up at your doorstep at 5am with some flowers and a shit eating grin, saying “can i sleep on yer couch?”
mundungus LOVES animals but doesn’t have any because of his lack of a home. his mother has a dog, though, and he loves that dog. he also feels v connected to stray dogs and cats and can be found petting and feeding them a lot.
hates himself deeply, doesn’t think he’s worth anyone’s time (despite constantly demanding it), has a low opinion of himself. he doesn’t get it if people care about him, to be honest? the only person he can properly accept it of is his mother, but even that’s complicated.
plots!
CUSTOMERS // a simple, easy connection! basically someone who buys drugs (also does like medicinal stuff? but also drugs-drugs) of mundungus or has paid him (good money) to nick something for them. he’s pretty down to do most things as long as it’s for the right price! 
PARTY FRIENDS // dung likes getting wasted / high / fucked up and having a good ol’ time with people. sure, he’s done it alone, but he prefers doing it with others. there’s a lot of room for diff options here?
YOU SAVED ME ONCE // ( alcohol tw ) a plot where someone got dung to a hospital when he got alcohol poisoning and basically saved his life?? meaning?? mundungus feels indebted and he hates that but!! he’s gonna pay your char back! he promises! 
UNDER PRESSURE // i imagine that dung has some ties to de’s as well bc of his less than legal work so? maybe some death eater could try and put some pressure on him? get him to do some dirty job bc it’d not matter if he died … etc etc 
UNDER PRESSURE 2.0 // on the other hand, i bet some order members are like 👀 at dung? this one’d be for order members who’re like … making sure that dung is still loyal and here?? making him feel a bit?? queasy?? 
ONE NIGHT STANDS // dung isnt rly good at romance but he’s good at no strings attached sex. this’d work in a lot of ways and w a lot of characters so imma keep this p open! dung is bi btw!!
THE ONE THAT GOT AWAY // your average angsty exes plot? mundungus is flighty, and while he does feel feelings for people, he’s not … good with commitment. this’d be a relationship that he broke off bc he got scared or ?? something else??
COUCHES // i need some couches that mundungus can crash on adkjfhsdf he needs a place ... to sleep. he will pay you back with drugs or ... stolen goods? money? something that he didnt acquire lawfully
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marvmacdonald · 5 years
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“she's fucking impetuous and daring, a little too bold and way too fucking fearless.”
MARY MACDONALD is 21 years old and works as an JUNIOR AUROR and is loyal to THE OOTP they were an GRYFFINDOR and are a MUGGLEBORN. SHE look like CHRISTIAN SERRATOS. 
CHARACTER PARALLELS: jessica jones ( jessica jones ), leia organa ( star wars ), arya stark ( asoiaf ), johanna mason ( the hunger games ), nancy wheeler ( stranger things ), rosa diaz ( b99 ), ellie ( the last of us ), raven reyes ( the 100 ), kat edison ( the bold type ), nina zenik ( six of crows ) AESTHETIC: red lipstick stains on drained cups of tea, leather jackets, cigarette bums crushed under doc martens, sitting down in the shower and letting time pass by, always wearing your gold cross necklace, messy ponytails, beer burps, laughter that’s filled with desperation, jean dungarees, screaming in your pillow, mud stained clothes, denim on denim on denim. LINKS: stats. pinboard. character tag. playlist.
history
mary had a little lamb? WRONG. mary had a little calf. because she was born on a dairy farm in the highlands of scotland ( laugh at my joke pls i worked hard on it ). she was born third to two muggles – a scottish father and a mexican mother, who loved each other deeply – and would eventually become their middle child. she could have become overlooked, but mary never felt discounted at home: while her parents were very often busy with the cows, their love ran deep.
her youth consisted of this: running through fields of grass, attending a muggle elementary where people sang songs at her ( old macdonald had a farm and mary had a little lamb, the former of which was, of course, accurate ), playing with the animals, building tree houses with her brothers and sister and playing football every spare moment she got. it was good and simple and wholesome.
of course, strange things happened, as they tend to with muggleborns: she’d explode her brother’s toy when she got angry, or let things fly around the room when she was laughing. when she found out she was a witch at age eleven, things fell in its place. and the macdonalds, while traditional catholics, accepted mary, which is the most important thing of it all. her parents were shocked, yes, but they squeezed her shoulder and promised to discover this all together.
which?? very much influenced mary greatly? because it went against a lot of things they – and she, too – believed in. magic was deemed evil by the church they attended. everything about this was supposed to be wrong, but her parents shifted their views because their love for their daughter was greater than their desire to cling to all the rules the church laid down for them, this has allowed her to have a faith in people, and while she may be cynical and bitter at times, that faith is still there.
i mean --- her parents accepted her, they were capable of openmindedness despite being traditional people in most other situations. other people can too.
hogwarts was as chaotic as home, and mary settled in quite nicely. sorted into gryffindor ( she guessed it was for her rambunctious nature, but who knew ), she found herself a second home and loved it. as it turned out, she was rather good with a wand as well – she didn’t do so good at essays, though – and genuinely liked learning ( except for history of magic. fuck that. ).
being a muggleborn had its downsides, of course, but mary never really allowed herself to feel discouraged. hurt? yes, definitely, but never discouraged. she wasn’t going to let it get to her, she told herself, but it did, especially when the harsh words turned into something more. it was during her confrontation with mulciber that mary felt true, harsh fear for the first time. she felt shut down, paralysed, depressed —– but then, after a while, she got up and took some important steps. she reported mulciber, which led to nothing, which caused her to feel angry, which in turn caused her to feel determination. if the system wasn’t going to be on her side, she’d just have to fucking change it, right? mary started throwing herself in her schoolwork, determined to join the dmle – hopefully as an auror, but any position would do. she suppressed her fear and the trauma that was there, and kept her head straight.
this entire situation is up for change and stuff when/if we get a mulciber! 
graduation rolled around and mary got the five required NEWTs to even apply. it was a nervewracking process, but once she got into auror training, she cried. like. for a full ass day. she was so proud of herself and she felt so determined and !! man. it was such a good, defining moment. around the same time, mary joined the order; she knew the ministry was corrupt, and that it’d not allow her to do everything she wanted to, when the order DID. mary had too much anger, too much determination to fight this bullshit to just stick with the ministry, and so the order seemed like the right place.
it’s only recently that mary graduated from her training and became a junior auror. it’s ... infuriating, at times, but also amazing. she hates the ministry and most of the people in it, feels paranoid in those walls, but knows that there are good people, too. people who want to better that place, like she does.
kaz brekker voice: brick by brick, i will destroy you.
also --- mary is ... very quite involved in the war. her time is divided between the order and work, and her dog. she’s determined to get this war to end. she doesn’t even care if she destroys herself in the process --- what does her life mean, if she could help save numerous people?
so right now, she’s fighting. she’s gritting her teeth and keeping her goals in the back in her mind and is focusing. and she does not always feel brave or confident or self assured, but that does not matter: mary macdonald always gets the fuck back up, and that’s what she will keep doing until she’s completely knocked down.
personality & tidbits.
mary is a human espresso. she’s so. damn. bitter?? despite the fact that she keeps on going and that she’s fighting her ass off, she’s tired and angry that things don’t seem to be moving in the right direction, she’s feeling bitter about the fact that this kind of discrimination is happening right in front of her eyes and that she does not have enough power to stop it. she feels powerless, which makes her feel bitter, which makes her cynical.
still! mary is not necessarily a debbie downer to be around. she keeps her bitterness ( and hopelessness, even ) carefully hidden in boxes in her mind. on the outside, she’s filled with quips and smiles and quick comments! just a sociable bean, but just a bitter one.
is a dog person and will fight anyone who prefers cats. has a cairn terrier called bowie. she loves him more than anyone.
obsessed with tea, tbh. her ma always said that ‘there’s nothing a cuppa can’t fix’ and mary definitely agrees with this statement.
though is also a ‘whiskey in a teacup’ kinda gal
can be spotted wearing either a rly nice ass blazer or a jean jacket, no inbetween. either office-fancy or farmer-chique
fucking loves muggle culture and loves fellow muggleborns and !!!!!! she loves it!!!
very much in a take-no-prisoners mindset at this point re: death eaters. it kind of scares her, tbh, but mary is very much capable of murdering a death eater, even if she could stun them — she’s just done. she’s very. done. with them. and this whole shbang? will only feed into this.
mary is ruthless, that’s what it boils down to. she’s a lot more than that, of course, but she’s ruthless — in small things ( football matches & boardgames ) but also in bigger ones, and of course the war is the main way it shows. mary is so angry. she’s so angry and scared and tired of feeling that way and tired of being scared to lose people and herself and of death and she’s so angry that people really are this way and that they really do these things — she wants it to stop. she wants the world to be right. and sometimes she thinks the ends do justify the means.
this is why she’s chaotic neutral and not chaotic good.
like ive had her turned to dark arts before just bc she’s so desperate to. fucking win. tbh i’m sure she has a growing interest rn. stop it mary :(
and she’s also like — mary doesnt care if she ruins herself? if she becomes a bad person who’s unable to live with the shit she’s done? as long as the world is better for it, as long as kids can go to hogwarts and feel safe and the world is a safe place for everyone. what does her soul matter in the grand scheme of things? she’d burn in hell forever if it meant the rest of the world changed for the better.
emotionally driven mess of a being
is catholic but struggles a lot with religion and feeling faithful, but she does still identify is a catholic, it’s just? complicated. it’s rly complicated and she hates it.
is a bit flighty when it comes to romance, def has a lot of one night stands/fwb situations though??? she’s just like??? i dont have time for romance its a WAR
has been trying to stop smoking for five years, but alas
a proud scot. a proud latina. proud proud proud. such a fucking lionness.
mary was a beater during her time at hogwarts and was Highly competitive. threw herself into the sport tbh after the mulciber incident. she still thinks football is superior, but you know, it isnt in the air.
she’s pan and out of the closet --- something that did put a strain on her relationship with her family. ( the fact that they could accept her magic but not her sexuality ... baffles mary, but bigots have never been very reasonable. ) she’s not very open about it at home, but otherwise ... she’s out here lovin everyone.
plot ideas!
roomies —– so mary is not Earning A Whole Lot Right Now but does not want to live at home any more because 1. its in the middle of nowhere and 2. most importantly, she’s afraid of endangering her family. she needs roomies! i’d love for her to live in glasgow/edinburgh/london/idk a city!!!
hook ups/fwb’s/etc —– mary is what the old ppl call promiscuous and she sleeps around. so ! let’s talk! former hook ups! booty calls! friends with benefits! etc etc etc!
party pals —- mary likes going to pubs and clubs in the muggle part of town bc it is a LIT way to escape the reality of the wizarding world and also, muggle clubs have better music. come party w her!!!!
in the dragon’s den together —- fellow ministry employees who side eye the ministry and whom mary can sip tea and judge their colleagues with
mudbloods club —- mary loves her fellow muggleborns and i would love some muggleborn friends that she can be buds with. ranting about dumb pureblood names and traditions and the fact that wizards dont have movies
general friendship ideas —- im just going to a bunch of ideas here: hogwarts friends, ride or dies, order pals, friendly exes, fellow tea drinkers that she can go on coffee/tea dates with, friends who are growing apart bc of the war (my fave), etc.
etc —- some other ideas i want to spitball: purists who h8 on mary’s life, fellow diagon alley employees, fellow order members, Annoyances, there is solidarity in being scottish, ministry connections, etc etc etc HIT ME UP
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moragmac · 6 years
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what is UP my dudes! under the cut i will be giving you a few bullet points about morag, as well as link to some handy-dandy pages, her full app and other stuff that you can clickity-click on for funs. feel free to click that little heart if u want to plot and YEET.
links.
pinboard.
biography.
application. ( which ... you really do not have to read because it’s long, but ! you can skim for bits. if u want. it’s just more comprehensive and complete than what i’m about to write but please do NOT feel obligated to read it lmao. )
stats sheet.  
class schedule.
quick intro.
FAMILY. morag was born as the fifth kid to graeme macdougal and rosemary manahan, and apart from her four older siblings, she has one younger brother who is currently a fifth year. 
her family is a union between a rather proud but neutral scottish, pureblood clan, and a proud and more proactive filipino pureblood family, that has been in the uk since the seventies. the word proud is key --- it’s what keeps both these families, and especially this particular branch, alive and breathing. being proud of their bloodstatus, but also their scottish and filipino heritage --- it’s their lifeblood.
her two oldest siblings ( evander and eithne ) are death eaters and her family has voiced support for blood purity in the past two years. besides her older siblings, they keep themselves rather neutral, though, hiding in the scottish highlands and every now and then moving a pawn on the chessboard called war. 
her parents fell out of love a long time ago, and morag knows. she was another effort to rekindle their love, together with her younger brother and her sister. her father is absent, always working, always doing something -- making connections, hiding in his study, working on things and stuff. her mother is a present force, always around to give commentary and directions, with her sharp nails pressing in shoulders or cheeks.
the macdougals are a unit. they do love each other, truly, and they are very big on family related things. dinners, with everyone present, and days at the lake, and game nights. 
morag doesn’t support blood purity, she knows that in her heart. she hasn’t actively shown it, though --- doing so, would have disastrous consequences, and she’s not ready to rebel against her family. she loves them, even if they -- and with them, she -- are on the wrong side of this. her mother is currently pressuring her to break up with megan, her half-blooded girlfriend (on which more later), which is putting her in more of a position where she has to choose. she cannot stay neutral of course, with the carrows at hogwarts, with some of her loved ones being considered filthy by her family ... but she wants to. it’s safe.
morag isn’t brave!! that’s what it comes down to.
HOGWARTS: morag went to hogwarts with a clear picture of who she was going to be. she was going with some older siblings already there, and lisa on her side --- she wasn’t scared. not really. sorted into ravenclaw -- which felt right, morag adjusted to hogwarts quite well tbh? the grounds reminded her of home ( and the country surrounding her house had always felt more like home than the building itself ) and there were plenty of familiar faces.
right of the bAT she wanted to prove herself. for her mother, and her family, but also to herself --- she’d been told she was a promising child, and so when magic didnt leave her wand as easily as it did with others, she became frustrated. morag worked hard, from day one. she wanted the best grades. wanted the teachers to love her. needed it. craved it. she had. to. be. best. 
this definitely stems from her family’s way of clinging to blood purity. morag has been told all her life that she’s better because of her surname, because of her blood --- she just wants proof of that. she wants to be best, like her parents have told her, and not just ebcause of something out of her control ( though that was definitely not her motivation in first year ). anyway. i write more about that in her app but i will REFRAIN.
joined the quidditch team in her third year as a reserve chaser/seeker, becomes a chaser in her fifth and succeeds cho as seeker in her sixth year and becomes captain then. loves quidditch. she wants to be best there, too, of course, but it’s a way to blow off steam.
morag is taking five newt subjects because she loves overworking herself. well, she doesn’t love it, she’s just particularly good at it. she’s taking muggle studies, dada, potions, history and charms.
is also in charms club!
socially, morag is kind of there. people know her, because she’s been captain for a year, and she’s kind enough to have a good chat with. she’s not one to get into very deep conversations and such, as she’s very high-strung, and always running to something she has to do --- be it a study group, club meeting, the library or training. 
is dating megan, and has been since around the yule ball. loves her. so much. i imagine they’re a quite well known couple as theyve been dating for so long now?? we love wlw!!!! her best buds are sue and mandy. her ex-best bud is lisa, who we dont talk abt bc she’s an asshole ! (jk, we love an icon called lisa)
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wanna1things · 7 years
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Radio DJ!Kim Jaehwan
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the idea came to me because for like a good 3 years of my life i wanted to be a radio dj and idk jaehwan fits this au well...
Genre;; fluff +radio dj au is that a thing idk
Warnings;; unless you hate jaehwan, his laugh, and music then none lol
Pairing;; Kim Jaehwan x reader
Requested;; no this is just another thing from my backlog lol
Summary;; Jaehwan is the radio dj for your university radio station, and he’s looking for someone to present with him… maybe something more?
Style;; bullet point
Word Count;; 1913
UH requests will be done by the end of the week!! just clearing the backlog of posts while i revise for my uni tests lol
jaehwan is pretty well known in your university for his job as a dj for the uni’s radio station
nobody knows what he’s studying, everyone assumes it’s music (they’re right), they just know he’s the guy with the weird laugh who hosts the midnight to 2am slot
aka when everyone is cramming
he plays pretty funky music at the start but by the end it’s chill tunes to help everyone wind down and actually get some sleep
you’re an avid listener
you stay up until 2am every day, not even to study just to listen to his show lol
you always make notes of the songs he plays because he seems to have almost the exact same music taste as you??
by the time it’s 2am your hand is aching from writing down all the songs he’s played lol
at 1am he always has a 5 minute gap where he covers a popular song on guitar and sings it too and sjhgfsjd it’s amazing you’re in love with his voice
it’s just…
you have no idea what he looks like
all of your friends know about your crush on the dj with the satanic laugh and they tease you 24/7
like lol how can you be in love with a guy you’ve never seen before
but theres some sort of;; connection that you feel with him lmao
anyway, as you walk into your class one day in the middle of the semester you notice a poster up on the pinboard
in handwritten bubble letters (you know the ones) it says
“kim jaehwan is recruiting!! send a playlist to my email [email protected] and i’ll rate you and decide on who will be my new co-host!! entries close at the end of the week!”
your heartbeat speeds up
now you have an opportunity to possibly meet the guy you’ve been crushing on since that one time you pulled an all nighter at the beginning of uni lol
you take note of his pretty stupid email address and take your seat at the back of the class
instead of listening you spend the whole time brainstorming your playlist sdhfhds
as soon as the lecturer dismisses you, you leg it out of the room and to your flat
but in your rush you accidentally run into someone
and by run i mean like you slam into this really cute guy
and you spill his drink lol
they seemed uh… pretty mad but honestly you were in such a rush to get back and sort out the playlist you just opened your bag and gave him a $5 bill to cover the costs lmao
as you walk away you swear you hear a familiar satanic laugh coming from the guy you just ran into but
you chalk it up to you just hearing things
you stay up until midnight sorting out the playlist and brainstorming
after trying to come up with themed playlists and stuff but losing motivation after a while
you decide to roughly follow the structure he uses in his show, funky and louder at the start and gradually getting softer
you put all of your favourite songs in there, and make sure to sprinkle a couple of ones that jaehwan plays regularly in there
and once you’re pleased with the result you send it to the email,, at exactly 11:59
before you know it jaehwans show is starting
“Hello fellow students!! It’s everyone’s favourite midnight dj Kim Jaehwan!! Thank you for all your submissions so far, i’ll be reviewing them tomorrow! For now let's get on with the show!’
you realise straight away the first song hes playing is the one you put first on your playlist
and you’re a bit creeped out but you just think its a coincidence i mean you two have the same music taste
but by the time the 5th song is playing eXACTLY the same as your playlist you realise
he’s literally just playing your playlist
you open up your email again and begin drafting a new email asking for an explanation like really why is he using your playlist??
within seconds you get a reply
“hello;; y/n;; yeah sorry about that you’re the only submission so far… i took a look at the first 3 songs and i decided i trust your choices enough to use your playlist for this show… hope you don’t mind??”
OF COURSE YOU DON’T MIND
you type a speedy reply because uh oh don’t want jaehwan thinking you’re mad
“hey jaehwan! i don’t mind at all!! does this mean i got the job lol??”
again in the space of 3 seconds you get a reply but this time it’s just two words
“no comment”
the next day you head into uni and you realise all of the posters jaehwan put up for recruiting have been taken down
honestly you’re a bit shook like does he not need a partner any more??
that is until halfway through your day you’re sitting in the library studying when you receive an email from the one and only worlds best dj kim jaehwan
“hey new partner! you’ve officially been recruited! meet me in the cafe in 20 minutes;; here’s my phone number _______!”
the first thing that comes to your mind is what do you save jaehwans number as dsjfgdfjh
you decide on ‘worlds no.1 dj’ and then pack up your work and make your way to the cafe
when you get there you see a guy sitting at a table on his own, looking at his phone suspiciously and sipping on his drink
when you look a bit closer you realise uh oh its the guy you bumped into yesterday don’t get noTICED
but after about 5 minutes of trying to hide from the guy you ran into, you still can’t spot jaehwan so you decide to ring his number
you’re mortified when you see the guy you ran into pick up his phone sjfhjs uh oh
you stay on the line and gradually make your way over to the table he’s at and sit down in the chair opposite him
he is honestly just as shocked as you
“okay y/n i have so many questions first of all why did you give me $5?? why were you in such a hurry?? what is this”
you can’t even process his questions because ok you just fell in love a litttttle bit more
i mean like this guy i mean jaehwan has the cutest cheeks and a really cuTE SMILE and really soft looking fluffy hair oh my god;;;
you’re almost about to grab your phone and call all of your friends like HA i fell in love with someone i’ve never seen and he turned out to be good looking as hell anyway LMAO
when he realises you’re not going to answer his questions he stands up and orders you an iced coffee lol
as he puts it in front of you, you thank him graciously and suddenly blurt out
‘thank you so much honestly i’ve been a fan of yours for a long time and we have the exact same music taste and i really admire you and you’re an amazing singer and musician an-’
‘woah okAY y/n i didn’t hire you just to hear compliments i mean i’m not complaining but you don’t need to thank me lol you have a gift with playlists that's whY i hired you’
he smiles at you really wide and you realise like you had nothing to be so nervous about he’s not got a grudge against you and hes also super nice?? at least he seems it
and so you’re welcomed to the radio family
at first everyone is so confused when your voice appears alongside jaehwan’s at 12am
but after a while everyone is very attached to your shows
you pick amazing songs together, you have gr8 banter and sometimes;; just sometimes you join in singing with jaehwan
after the show he always compliments you on how good you are at singing but tbh he’s so whipped he doesnt know
thats right
jaehwan was interested you from the moment you gave him instant compensation for running into him
and now, after spending all this time with you, he’s just like
so in love
like;; not only do you have mad talent but you also can deal with him and his annoying laugh like lets be honest most of his friends give up after an hour or two
even his best friend the business major minhyun can only handle him for so long lol
but you two are so in tune and theres some sort of connection between you two that words can’t explain;; one that you’ve been feeling for a LONG TIME
it doesn’t help that now there’s mad gossip going around
“that person that djs with jaehwan for the midnight slot?? yeah them i heard they’re dating jaehwan as well lol”
uH
minhyun, who sometimes comes and sits to watch live action midnight slot, has also noticed that you both have pretty obvious feelings for each other
he’s noticed how when you look at jaehwan it’s like you’re looking at the whole damn universe
and how jaehwan can’t help but smile to himself whenever you smile
and he starts up a plan
a plan to convince jaehwan to confess
one night after the slot they walk you back to the dorm together
minhyun feeling like a bit of a third wheel lol
but as soon as you’re safely inside minhyun whispers to jaehwan
‘heyyyy jaehwan…. I know about your crush on y/n’
jaehwan turns briGHT RED
‘haha what do u mean i have no idea what you’re talking about buddy sorry’
‘bro;;; are you blind she likes you back’
nobody has ever seen jaehwan whip out his phone quicker
in a moment of madness he dials your number quicker than lightning and calls you down to the courtyard
minhyun makes his way back to his dorms on his own because he already knows this is too cheesy to watch i mean he could record it for blackmail but jaehwan would probably kill him if he did lol
as soon as you get downstairs with your dressing gown wrapped around you jaehwan kneels down on the floor like romeo-style
‘jaehwan if u have something to say please hurry up my hot chocolate is getting cold-’
‘y/n~~ i have loved you~~ since you gave me five dollars~~ im glad i walked into you~~ or technically you walked into me but still~’
is he really singing his confession? yes. this is jaehwan we are talking about
you’re not sure if it’s because of embarrassment or happiness but you can feel your cheeks heating up
‘jaehwan if this is you asking me to date you, i accept, but please come inside it’s cold lol’
of course he comes in and you share your hot chocolate
from that day on you were the cutest and most EXTRA couple ever
you announce your relationship in the show by playing the cheesiest love songs for an hour
at the end of the year makeshift awards you win the cutest couple award (and jaehwan wins weirdest laugh award, as expected)
you also win best duet award for your daily singing sessions at 1am
all in all you two are super cute and super extra
everyone is jealous but you’re still their fAVE COUPLE
listen i love jaehwan so much okay this made me so soft for jaehwan uGHH anyway i hope you enjoyed and that this wasn’t a disaster lol i’m going to SCHLEEP
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emo-boy-oliver-blog · 6 years
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Life Update #51
Heyyy yall! It’s the 11th of December and I’ve been on holidays and it has been great! A lot has happened as I haven’t updated for almost a month but I’ll just list the biggest stuff that happened :)).
So after a little while of being on holidays my mum and I drove down to Melbourne, we also brought the dogs (which is why we drove down). It was a whole day of driving which was a t r e k but it was cool when we got there. Once I arrived in Melbourne all was pretty cool, we stayed at my nan and pops house which meant deadname central but apart from that it was cool. We went over to my aunts house with my cousins n shit and turns out they all saw a video on my YouTube about being trans so they were all calling me Oli but with she/her pronouns but it’s a start. My step dad caught a plane down there a while in and stayed at my grandparents as well. A couple days into my trip I was at my aunts house and my uncle was saying a heap of homophobic shit even though he knows I’m trans so I ran off and wrapped presents with my accepting cousin, he doesn’t quite understand what being trans is but I explained it to him and he’s starting to get it, he’s in his mid twenties, anyways that night shit got really intense and dark and I can’t say everything that happened online but basically my mum and I had a really intense discussion with my uncle and he said he didn’t get it but he will accept me. On the day before Christmas we went to my Step Dads family for their families Christmas. It was really cool, my step dads family is very accepting especially because his sister is a lesbian and his nephew is gay so everyone was calling me the right name and pronouns. I spent most of the day chatting to my step brothers girlfriend because neither of us knew everybody since we aren’t like I N the family, she was really cool and she is a uni student. I also talked with my step brother and sister and my step sisters boyfriend a bit. I got some gifts from my step dads family which I was not expecting!! I got a cool t shirt and a rebel sports voucher and an itunes voucher and a jar filled with gingerbread, non-alcoholic rum balls and candy canes. That night we went to carols by candelight with some of my mums friends from the UK. They were visiting Australia so we met up with them in the city and had dinner and then saw the carols. It was my mums friend and her husband and son and daughter. The son  was twenty something and was also called Oliver and Oli as a nickname!! We went back to their apartment in the city to hang out and then we stayed in a hotel ourselves. On Christmas morning we drove back to my nan and pops and I got presents!! I got pop vinyls and a P!ATD record and mini guitar figurines and lush bath bombs and a calligraphy set and lights that said ‘OLI’ and cards against humanity and just lots of cool stuff! We then went to my aunts house and the whole family was there, we ate heaps of food and I played with my cousins daughter who is 3 years old and adorable. She played hide and seek with me but would always hide in the same spot and I’d pretend I had no idea where she was for a while. I also buried ‘treasure’ in the garden for her to dig up. The older family members played cards against humanity with me and it was super funny and entertaining.
On boxing day I flew down from Melbourne to Tassie and met my dad and step mum there and we stayed at our house down there, it was a really nice time. For the first day my uncle was there as he had been there for Christmas and he gave me a really nice wallet for Christmas. Also on that trip we went on a really long road trip and went to a national park where we went on a bushwalk and saw a platypus!! On that roadtrip we also went to a really pretty spot for a picnic, it was in front of this beautiful blue water surrounded by mountains on squishy green grass. We ate rolls and I read ‘Elites of Eden’ and we played this cool outdoor came called ‘Finska’. We also went and saw the boats finish the race of ‘Sydney to Hobart’ and the boat I had bet on won so I got $50. Mine didn’t even win first to the finish line though, the first place got an hour taken off for cheating so mine won!!! On New Years Eve we walked down to the harbour and saw some really nice fireworks to celebrate 2018. While in Tassie I went and saw the new Star Wars with my dad which I didn’t really like BUT THEN we all went to see ‘the Greatest Showman’ which OH MY GOD MY NEW RELIGION! The music is iMPECABLE the story made me cry it was honestly my favourite thing ever, in fact I’m listening to the soundtrack right now, I also fell in LOVE with Zendaya who is in it, she is my actual wife I am IN LOVE. Also while in Tassie I got a basketball because in Melbourne I discovered a passion for shooting hoops.
Over the holidays I became close with my old unrequited crush of four years and wOW fell for her again, I told her again and nEWSFLASH she’s still not interested, she was super sweet about it but ahh it hurt my heart a little lot bit. I’m glad we are close again though because she was once my best friend and i missed her.
Once I arrived back home a heap of lgbt+ clothing arrived that I got for Christmas and also a card from one of my internet friends!! Also when I got back I did a lot of catching up with friends. Pretty soon after I got back I caught up with my best bro, we went to the shops and went to an arcade and played a couple of games and saw the greatest showman (yes again its amazing) and then he slept over at my house which was lots of fun. We swum in the pool and had water fights with my water guns. Then a little bit later I caught up with the same bro and a girl from my old school, we went ice skating together and then went to the arcade and it was sUPER FUN. I’ve also been taking photos in the photobooth every time I go to the arcade so I have a collection on my pinboard. Then a day or two after that I went over to a friends house and 5 of us from my theatre place caught up. We played a card game called ‘What do You Meme’ and listened to Hamilton and watched Pitch Perfect. I felt really happy because 3 of them were cis dudes and they were treating me exactly like they treated each other apart from a couple pronoun slip ups and it felt nice to be treated like a boy.
Yesterday my best pal and I went to a trans support group!! It was amazing!! Basically we walked into this room and there were a heap of teens sitting on couches and chairs and we sat on some chairs and I was super awkward and nervous at first but everyone was so sweet and we all put nametags on saying our names and pronouns. For the first hour-ish a trans woman gave us a talk and we asked questions and stuff like that just about legal rights and working while trans and all that stuff. For the next hour we all chatted and I stopped being awkward and I made a heap of pals which is so exciting! I’m so excited about next months meet up now.
Well that’s all for this long ass update, today my mum and I went and looked at a house we might rent and tomorow I’m going to the shops with a friend
Update soon woot
Oliver
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stcrmlike · 6 years
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              *makes eye contact with security cameras to assert dominance*
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ZACHARY CLUTTERBUCK really is the spitting image of NATHAN STEWART-JARRETT, right? For someone only THIRTY years old, ZACH has been forced to endure so much. Yeah, that MUGGLE has been scraping by at the sanctuary for ONE MONTH now, working as a PATROL GUARD in the DIVISION OF PROTECTION. HE identifies as CIS-MALE and is known to be CYNICAL and UNEMOTIONAL but also PRAGMATIC and CLEVER. Best of luck surviving through this.
henlo it’s mar!! finally bringing a muggle to ur dashes!! if you’ve played opposite of him before, he’s basically based on my frank longbottom (hence the stupid surname) but slightly updated to modern times & muggle life!
LINKS: pinboard, character tag.
pre-outbreak !
zach is born zachary archibald christina clutterbuck, and is known as zachary for the good part of his childhood. his parents are posh, proper rich people with three sons destined to do well in life. he goes to boarding school ( winchester college, to be precise ), wears ties on sundays to church and speaks in an accent that he’ll be mocked for later in life. he’s got expectations weighing down on his shoulders, his brothers’ legacies already bigger than his own ( they are older than him, so that’s logical, but still ). 
his family is very stoic, tbh. theyre all about PERFORMANCE and SUCCESS and AMBITION, don’t do much of warmth and compassion. sure, there’s an understanding that they all love each other deeply and support one another, but there’s no focus on it. the focus is on careers, reputation and success. 
think: dps vibes.
he does well, though. zachary is a successful student, a dedicated kid. he works hard. he works too hard, perhaps, throws himself in his work and lacks any growth in sociability. with his mother stoicism and his father’s hard working nature streaming through his veins, he is the perfect student, but a shit friend. 
he just doesn’t have many friends. he’s got study buddies and an abundance of good grades, but not many friends. he’s just off-putting, to be honest, with his cynical tones and harsh way of interacting and the way he just doesn’t really seem to understand how to speak honestly without being an asshole. 
he starts going by zach at some point. not by choice; people just start calling him that, because zachary is too long and elaborate and, heck, even if he doesn’t have that many friends, his acquaintances feel like zachary is too official. he gets into manchester university and starts a bachelor in criminology. it’s not as admirable as his mother or father would have wanted for him --- they would have preferred to see him studying to become a lawyer or a doctor or something that earned a lot of money, but zach had his mind set. 
he meets tara there. she’s clever and funny and kind, and she likes him. and shit, zach was so caught up in getting his career in order, focused on running track and getting right grades that he thought he had no time for kindness, but she taught him there was always room for that. they grew, closer, closer, closer, and fell in love. 
he gets a job at scotland yard and moves to london, making another big city his hometown ( he’s not linked to any places: he swapped birmingham for winchester in his youth and moved to manchester once university came around, and so moving to london wasn’t a big step. frank is only linked to himself and his mind, and tara --- tara, who allowed him to grow. ) he does work there he enjoys, work that feels good to do, he gives back and works hard and is dedicated to a fault.
he marries tara at some point -- i have to fuss these deets out w jinx bUT he does!!! -- and it’s the happiest day of his life and he loves her SO MUCH!! they’re colleagues and partners in crime and best friends and he’s the first person he’s felt at home with and he’s So, So, Happy to be married to her. FLUFF.
outbreak !
and so his life is all good. he’s working hard, learning a language on the side to keep his mind fresh, loving his wife. he drinks coffee and curses and is an ass, still, though in a more nuanced way. AND THEN THE FUCKING WORLD COLLAPSES.
the wizarding world is exposed and apparently his wife knew. apparently she’s what they call a squib. he’s angry, in all honesty, unsettled, confused. he doesn’t know what to do. the whole world is turned upside down and zach, zach who clings to logic and facts and everything his eyes can see and his hands can touch, feels the ground being ripped from under him.
there’s no time for anger, though --- and he gets it, too, why she didn’t tell him, and he doesn’t want to be angry, but there’s this thing he didn’t know about, and it’s quite big, and he’s angry at the entire wizarding world on top of it, so he doesn’t want to be angry and he tries to direct it to the thing he should really be angry at: these so-called death eaters --- and so he shakes it off and prepares to move north with tara on his side.
he’s capable. he’s got a gun and a pair of fast legs and a quick mind, but it’s still a tough journey. it’s a long one, especially, and there’s death and decay everywhere they go, and even more danger. he wonders where the fuck these damned wizards are and why the hell they’re not doing more than running into the same direction. 
he’s been at the castle for a month now and he’s ... adjusting. he’s got his gun still and so got on the patrol team and he’s glad, because he doesn’t trust these wizards at all. they go against everything he knows, and while he’s happy to be safe and knows that they have a lot of things that can help them, he also knows that theyre basically walking timebombs that could cause immense damage. he’s honestly being a bitter, salty asshole and he’s just!! not!! fuckign!! amused!! by any of this.
personality & tidbits !
frank is a big picture kind of guy. he looks at the world and sees a puzzle to solve, little gaps where things need to be filled, black, charred pieces that need to be removed ... he’s so focused on the big picture, that he sometimes forgets to look at the world around him. this makes him very ??? much capable of being an asshole and being insensitive and ugh. even now, when he’s traveled all the way up north and has seen so many small kinds of suffering, he thinks more about the bigger picture. he’s all like: sure, you’re hurt and you’re in fear, but damn it, there’s zombies out there. we gotta focus on that.
does this with his own problems, too. really doesn’t pay much attention to his feelings and while he’s become better at it over the years, it’s just?? a struggle. especially when there’s so much else demanding attention at the moment. 
i mean it’s not always a bad thing? it’s good to have pragmatic people, but sometimes it just makes him kind of a dick. 
captain raymond hold from b99.
really likes learning and is very intelligent, tbh. his time at boarding school rly gave him a ?? lot of control and stuff and he’s just good at learning and dedicating himself to it. even now, he’s learning --- he’s picked up some books from the hogwarts library on subjects to try and educate himself about this whole new world.
likes coffee and cigarettes and sandwiches.
really misses london and cities in general. sure, hogwarts is pretty, and it reminds him of his boarding school years, but damn it, he misses being around cars and noise all the time. he misses the chaos that wasn’t scary like this one.
can be?? nice?? like he’s not a full asshole. he’s just OCCUPIEd.
fucking hates his surname and when he was a detective and he had to say “detective clutterbuck” he wanted to legit drop through the earth because half the perps were like? ?? CLUSTERFUCK??. just call him zach.
accidental asshole with a big heart and too much on his mind. 
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canary3d-obsessed · 3 years
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Restless Rewatch: The Untamed Episode 17 second part
(Masterpost) (Previous Post) (Pinboard)
Warning: Spoilers for All 50 Episodes!!
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Breaking Good
Wen Qing comes to visit Wen Ning in their backyard meth lab, and tells him that he fucked up a recipe, merely by taking a whiff of the concoction. She uses the approved "wave fumes toward self" way of smelling that you learn in high school science if you live in a country that believes in teaching science, which OP does not.
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Wen Ning wants to know if they are going to have a feud, and she tells him there already is one. She tells explains to him that they're good Wens, not evil Wens, and that Jiang Cheng is fucked, and they should send the Jiangs away in the morning before Wen Chao comes around. 
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Wen Ning whines at her about all of this, shifting into little-brother persona and acting like he didn't just take down 40 of Wen Chao's soldiers in a single night. He does this same persona shifting in his later unlife, with Wei Wuxian. When there is trouble, he's extremely effective, and can even tail WWX and Lan Wangji without getting caught, but then he is hopeless when dealing with turnips or children. 
Here, it seems like a version of Wei Wuxian's own little-brother persona, in which he pretends to be helpless so that his sister can take care of him.
#studyblr
Wei Wuxian comes into Wen Qing's head shop to ask her for medical books. He loves his brother so much he's volunteering for a research project. We've seen him be clever before; we've seen circumstantial evidence that he's a good student, but now we're going to see him actually buckling down and doing intellectual work.
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Wen Qing thinks its hopeless and wants Wei Wuxian to get some rest. But he gives her puppydog eyes, so she sets him up in her library.
Wei Wuxian reads a huge pile of medical books and learns interesting things about the human body.   
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(more after the cut)
Hopefully he does not splotch ink all over them while he holds this wet brush directly over the page. Why does he even have a brush in his hand? Is he taking notes in the margin? 
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Wen Qing eventually tells him to take a break and go see Jiang Yanli.
Segmentation fault (core dumped)
Jiang Yanli is tending to Jiang Cheng, gently telling him to suck it up by citing their father, which is probably not the greatest idea. 
Yanli's wearing dark blue with white and looks awesome.  It's not Gusu Lan blue, but the blue and white is an interesting choice for the excruciating heart to heart they're about to have.  
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Wei Wuxian shows up looking terrible, or the Xiao Zhan version of terrible, i.e. handsome and a little scruffy. But also worn out, unhappy, and fragile.
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Jiang Yanli wants him to rest, but he wants to find a way to repair Jiang Cheng's core, and his mind races, trying to think of where he can get books and who can help him. His thoughts instantly go to Cloud Recesses and Lan Wangji. His face lights up at the thought that Lan Wangji will help him, and he hops up, ready to dash off and find him.
The first time I watched this I was like, dude yes you’re in love, but you can’t just dash off to find Lan Wangji, not when there’s a war on.  This time I was like, actually wow things would turn out a whole lot better if you got Lan Wangji to help you, instead of coming up with your own plan.
Mother Mother Can You Tell Me
Jiang Yanli tells him to slow his roll.  He's pushing himself too hard and she's afraid he will collapse. Then Wei Wuxian comes out and says what's driving him: maybe all these disasters are his fault.
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It's telling, I think, that he cites Madame Yu, not Jiang Cheng, in this moment, even though Jiang Cheng has blamed him much more thoroughly and consistently. He's talking about one mother figure, to another mother figure, and looking for absolution.
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He super does not get what he's looking for.
Jiang Yanli slowly lets go of him and goes the fuck off. She asks, rhetorically, what he's to blame for, and then lists off all of the shit that's happened.  She finishes up by saying, look at our situation; blaming won't help anything. 
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It's unclear, because language/translation, if her answer is "it doesn't matter who's to blame" I.E. "yes, it's your fault, but I'm letting it go" or if she is saying "how does blaming yourself help anything?" I.E. "it's not your fault, stop being a drama llama."
Her body language, though, seems pretty blameful - she lets go of him, yells at him, sits down and turns away from him.  And his reaction is not one of shared grief, or of someone who is trying to get over himself; he's totally crushed, and he literally never unburdens himself to her again.  Even when he asks her, much later, about love, he immediately backs out of the conversation. 
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There is no violence in this moment and her reaction is understandable, but this is kind of similar to that one time when his brother choked him in a beautiful field of grass, in order to make himself feel better. 
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Then she kind of relents and takes his hand, telling him that she needs him and reminding him that he promised that they will go back to Lotus Pier. I don't remember him promising this, but okay. 
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He puts his head on her lap and he cries, she cries, comatose Jiang Cheng cries; FUCK this episode.  
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Jiang Cheng manages to cry only one tear and does it on the side of his face that his siblings can't see because he's not going to give them the satisfaction of sharing this moment with him, I guess.
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When Wei Wuxian puts his head on Jiang Yanli's lap, it's part of a ritual for them, that they both are comforted by; he does it again much later, after they return to Lotus Pier. But this ritual does not actually do anything to relieve his burdens. As a male adult, and the only Jiang Clan disciple with any abilities, it falls to him to save the clan, whatever it takes, and he is heavily aware of it.
Wen Qing comes along and sees the sweet part of this complicated Shijie-Shidi dynamic, and decides to help with Wei Wuxian's research project. When the trio had just lost their parents, gotten sick, been pursued by enemies, & had one of Yanli's little brothers horribly wounded, Wen Qing was like, eh, I'll do the doctor stuff but that's it. But lap-crying is another level. 
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Wen Qing: Nooo don't put your head on her knees I failed my saving throw
Group Project
Wen Qing goes and cleans up the mess in the library, putting everything in order and settling in to read systematically. Wen Qing probably has the prettiest bullet journal. (OP looks proudly at the 100 loose slips of paper and piles of random stuff on her own desk)
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Wei Wuxian has shaved and rested and comes in with a tray of food for Wen Qing, and then goes to his table in the back to start working. He claims he made "porridge" for her and that she has to eat to gain strength, and she gives him an intrigued expression.  This moment is just blatant het baiting.  
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In fact the food he brings her is clearly not porridge, which might just be a translation error, but also he totally can't cook, so it's not clear if he's joking and Yanli or Wen Ning made the food, or if this is just inedible.
The Things We Do For Love
Yanli is working in the meth lab and coughing a lot. Yanli's chronic illness is a sign of what's to come for Wei Wuxian, because strong cultivators don't get sick. Yet Yanli, as a physically vulnerable person, who has either a weak golden core, or none, is still intrinsically valuable.  Her presence in this scene is a reminder that Jiang Cheng's life is not, actually, over; he just feels like it is.
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While Yanli cooks the meth, Wei Wuxian and Wen Qing have a study montage that is the equivalent of a training montage, except without "Eye of the Tiger" on the soundtrack.
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Jiang Cheng remains unconscious. Apparently if you stick nails in the top of someone's head, you make them sleep, and in the back of their head, you turn them into part of your zombie army. Fortunately Wen Qing's aim is good. Jiang Cheng is looking devastatingly handsome as usual the TV version of unwell, and has grown a perfect Dorito-chip of stubble on his chin to go with his new 'stache.
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Eventually Wei Wuxian changes back into his non-vampire robe and he finds the answer in an old scroll book. The Ikea instruction picture shows arrows going from the guy on the left to the guy on the right.  Clearly it's not a great procedure for the guy on the left.
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Wei Wuxian's face shows us exactly how not great. 
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Like walking in the rain and the snow and there’s no place to go and you’re feeling like a part of you is dying
He goes outside and gazes up at the trees and the sky as he contemplates the sacrifice that circumstance is forcing on him. He's not even making a choice at this point; his choice was made the moment he found the procedure. But it's going to be a tremendous loss for him. He values sword cultivation at least as much as Jiang Cheng does; he even fell in love with a boy over crossed swords. So he sits and just kind of comes to terms with this new understanding of his future. (Big gifs here)
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Wen Qing finds him sitting, stunned, on the porch. She doesn't know what's up so she just sits quietly with him until he's ready to tell her.
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She doesn't love the plan.  
Thunder, Th-th-thunder
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Wen Ning is bringing food up when he sees them arguing, and he is startled by situationally appropriate thunder and lightning. Having recently watched The Lost Tomb Reboot I've come to expect thunder and lighting to appear on cue in any possible situation, so the fact that this mini-storm clears right up again doesn't bother me.
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What About You?
Wen Ning dashes inside to see what Mom and Dad are fighting about. They're having a polite shouting match because Wen Qing refuses to yank out Wei Wuxian's core. 
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Wen Qing: I hate the idea of harming you Wei Wuxian: I don’t even understand that sentence
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Wei Wuxian doesn’t, of course, feel that he is important in any way, and ignores her concerned and appalled expressions in favor of telling her to just do it anyway. Amazingly, this does not convince her. 
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OP’s 177cm-tall son keeps telling her this
Then Wei Wuxian plays the "you know Jiang Cheng" card, which...I guess she does? Maybe he was chatting her up more than we saw in Cloud Recesses? He hasn't given her the comb or anything yet. Wei Wuxian explains that Jiang Cheng cares about gain and loss, and cultivation is his life. If he can only be ordinary the rest of his life will be ruined.
Wen Qing asks the question that nobody ever asks him: What about you? 
Wei Wuxian has literally nothing to say to that, possibly because the question is so new to him. 
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Wen Ning doesn't know what's going on but comes squarely in on team Wei, of course, and begs his sister to Do The Thing.  How fucking horrified is Wen Ning going to be when he learns what The Thing is? What he is personally going to help do to his beloved friend? Yikes.   
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Wen Qing caves, warning them that the chance of success is only 50 percent. Wei Wuxian is happy to take those odds.
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Lan Wangji, projecting his voice from Episode 46: fifty percent, are you fucking kidding me?
Soundtrack: 1. Mother Mother by Tracy Bonham 2. The Things We Do For Love by 10cc 3. Thunder by Imagine Dragons
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