#the sleep doesnt need me

[webvampzz]

sleep kinda overrated tbh

#i hate sleep #i dont want to sleep #i dont need sleep #the sleep doesnt need me #(i cant sleep) #random

[actual-changeling]

no but i'm still thinking about this post and now i want a fic that's just duke of hell crowley and archangel aziraphale somehow always ending up in the elevator together, having a silent fight over whether they go up or down first in the mornings and tense silence in the evening when they both return to earth.

because they're not talking. about any of it. aziraphale is in the bookshop with muriel whenever he goes back to earth and crowley has his (renovated) flat. it's horrible. they miss each other. crowley refuses to cave and it's a matter of pride, spite, and heartbreak he needs to process. aziraphale still went back to heaven, even if he's technically 'living' on earth. he went back to hell because fuck it, he might as well try to stop the second coming himself.

it starts slow. aziraphale brings him a coffee one morning and crowley looks at it for a long while before taking it just before he gets off. crowley brings him a muffin the next day. they do small talk, they begin to say "good morning" and "see you tomorrow" and most of it is lingering looks and almost-touches, but it helps.

then one evening, late, later than usual, they're both exhausted and had horrible days caused by the same bureaucratic bullshit, and when they part in front of the pub, aziraphale hesitates.

nightcap? he tries to smile, tries to not seem too hopeful, tries to ignore the way his heart beatsbeatsbeats.

sure. crowley decides one drink can't hurt.

(it's not just one drink. it's a bottle. they talk about nothing important, complain about work and idiotic celestial beings.

two bottles in, aziraphale grows brave.

two bottles in, crowley grows desperate.

crowley, he says in that tone of voice that means something big is about to follow, and he cannot do that, not tonight, not yet. so he kisses him, leans into his instincts to shut him up, and as it does, one thing leads to another, and the next morning the elevator ride is awkward.

they both come out of the bookshop. not a single word is spoken.)

two things happened that night, and i have only told you about one of them, but it's the other one that changes things.

they figure it out eventually, they always do, but for now their fingers brush when they both try to go for the buttons, and crowley flinches back like he's been burned. aziraphale swallows apologies and tears, and, after a moment of thought, presses 'down' first.

it's a start.

#alex talks good omens #good omens #ineffable husbands #crowley #aziraphale #good omens season 2 #go2 #aziracrow #crowley x aziraphale #ineffable divorce #the final fifteen #if this doesnt make sense its 4 am and i need to sleep but this didnt let me rest so #ignore any spelling mistakes

[miusato]

Lmao so I finally done drawing a lineup of P3 cast in my Highschool AU. Call them wokesona or something ahskskskskasosk

#i really need to figure out an actual name for this AU i cant keep calling it wokesona to myself privately forever 🥲 #anyway Aki's costume is like the least y2k here cuz I cant recall anyone wearing jumpsuit as fashion at that time #but shhh mom said i can be cringe online today so like I was thinking that Aki doesnt really have a lot of new clothes in his wardrobe #most of the time he thrifted it or its a hands down from his foster parents or something #but it doesnt really matter his fangirls doesnt care that he is out of date when it comes to fashion #all they know is that boy is hot and they're the reason why Aki has terrible sinus because they wont get his name outta their mouth #anyway again this isnt their permanent clothes hhh its more like a guide for me for everyone's style #i was envisioning that if this is an actual cartoon that nick somehow decides to greenlight #it would be something like 'as told by ginger' where everyone changes clothes in every episode #anyway now that I get this outta my way I can finally go through my request hsjsjaka bUT FIRST //passes out and sleeps for 1 millennia #asukart #persona 3 #persona 3 reload #persona 3 portable #yukari takeba #mitsuru kirijo #fuuka yamagishi #aigis #aigis persona 3 #kotone shiomi #minako arisato #persona 3 femc #shinjiro aragaki #akihiko sanada #makoto yuki #persona 3 mc #junpei iori #00s highschool au

[starry-bi-sky]

Clone^2 Damian

If you really think about, Damian's situation in the clone^2 au is... kinda tragic? Especially in the early months of his arrival. Like,,, think about it. Damian has always known he was a clone of Damian Wayne, that he was a copy of the blood son. There was nothing 'original' about him, not even his name (of which at least Danny has that). He was just... a replacement. A disposable one, to boot.

And he knew that, to an extent, by the time he was six years old. he might not have been actively acknowledging it -- he's six years old -- but deep down he knew. And like, he's six years old. Every small child craves the love and affection of an adult, especially their parents, and even though he knew he was clone, I imagine he still considered - and still does consider, somewhat - Talia and Bruce as his mother and father. And I really doubt he was... getting it?

Now, I know Talia loves Damian, her son. At least in some interpretations she does, and in this au she does. But... a clone of her son? I'm not so certain if she would have the same affection for baby Dames as she would for Damian. I don't think she would treat him badly, but I don't think Talia would treat him warmly either. Kinda just, distant. Colder than she would have been with OG Damian.

And, I know I've mentioned Damian's arrival from Danny's point of view, and its kind of comical kind of insane from his perspective -- a little boy clone of Damian Wayne falls through a portal and immediately attacks him. That sounds like a bad joke.

But, if you think of this from Damian's point of view? It's like he just got dropped into a scary movie. Like, think about it. You're six years old, and suddenly a portal, as green and as swirling as your grandfather's pools, opens up beneath your feet and sucks you through.

After an intense bout of vertigo, you end up in a massive, urban city -- completely different from the rural mountain palace that you lived in for the last six years of your life, and in this city, you don't know any of the language. You don't know what anyone is saying, you can't read any of the signs - you are completely stranded, away from home.

And then, to make things worse, you're facing a figure with a terrifying mask and eyes as burning green as the portal you fell through. Of course Damian's first instinct, six years old, is to attack. He's terrified.

And this figure, he's not a good fighter, but he's fast, and he dodges you quickly. He grabs your sword with his hands, and tries to restrain you, saying something in a language you don't know. Naturally, Damian is just scared. He's six! He'd just be learning how to read if he was normal child going to school.

This figure halfway through the fight yanks off his mask -- he realizes you're scared -- and looking at you now, is a youthful version of your father. This is a clone of your dad, someone you have never met but, six years old, still wants to. Damian gets defensive. This is an imposter.

But this imposter eventually gets you home with him - and he's using his little box, his phone, to communicate with you through a mechanical voice speaking in arabic. and it's frustrating. The boy, the imposter, can say whatever to you just fine, but trying to talk back is a hassle and a half. He's six, he doesn't have that much patience.

He wants to go home.

And so he keeps trying to run away. He keeps trying to find out of this hellish concrete jungle, and he keeps getting lost. It's loud, and busy, and there are people talking to you and you don't understand them, and there are rules and signs you don't understand - Damian tries to cross the street and nearly gets hit by a car. He doesn't know how the road signs work, he was never taught. They didn't get to that.

And he gets lost. And it gets dark, and Damian is brave, but he is six, and this is the worst stress he's been under in all his six years of life. He wants, desperately more than anything, to go home. Why wouldn't he? The only stable... semi-stable environment he was in just got ripped out from under his feet, literally! He wants his mother.

And it's not happening.

But there's something good to be said, at least. The imposter that looks like his father always comes and finds him, no matter what. He could have left that morning, and he will find Damian at midnight, frazzled and worried, and carrying an extra jacket with him because it is cold in Amity Park and Damian is six years old.

And sometimes Damian attacks him - he's scared and stressed and he doesn't want to be here. And every time he catches the sword. Even though Damian can see it cut into his hand and pearls of blood well up and stains his fingers. Even though Damian can see him wince in pain and bite his lip, he still catches it.

But with that little box, he coaxes Damian to come back with him. It's cold, it's dark, Amity Park is unsafe at night. They can figure something out tomorrow, please. And every time, he agrees, reluctantly. And the imposter takes the extra jacket he brought with -- a flannel, a hoodie, a jacket -- and he wraps it around him. It's warm, Damian's clothes are not that thick, and even though he thinks he might hate this imposter, he still sticks close to his legs as he leads him down the street.

And sometimes the imposter carries him, because Damian's shoes are not that thick, and he cuts his foot on broken glass while they're walking home. The imposter sits in the bathroom with him and carefully cleans the cut out, and makes sure it doesn't get infected.

There's hope you know, he still has it. His mother will be looking for him. She'll be worried. He's important to them. Damian may not be the original, but he is still a blood son. He is still her son. She will come find him. This nightmare will end soon. He can go home.

And then weeks pass, and nothing. Then months, and nothing. His family is not coming for him, and it hurts. Hurts more than anything. And yet while that happens, the boy he's attacked, and hurt, teaches himself arabic in order to speak to him. He takes Damian out of the house one afternoon and buys him new clothes, or tries to. And then he keeps buying him new clothes. He gives him blankets and gives up his bed to him until they can get him one himself, and steadily he teaches Damian english.

This boy is kind. Kinder than Damian's ever experienced, and he doesn't know what to do with it. He's devastated by the fact that he is not as important to his family as his family is to him. What do you do when you're six years old and you learn something like that? When a random stranger who looks like your father is kinder to you, and cares more about you than your family did?

And then Damian tells him he's a clone. He's Damian Wayne's clone, and he tells him his purpose - that their grandfather made him to kill him. And the boy, the imposter, Damian thinks he probably already knows that he's a clone. But he doesn't say that. He just nods, and asks him if he wants to tell his original about him.

Damian says no. He doesn't want to. He's tired of living in the shadow of his original. He wants to keep this to himself. This is his. For once, all of this is his.

And to his surprise, the imposter doesn't try and convince him otherwise. He just nods, and says okay. And when Damian asks why, the imposter - his brother - looks at him and says.

"I don't care about Damian Wayne. I care about you." And in Damian's gobsmacked silence, his brother continues. He tells him that if Damian doesn't want to tell his original that he exists, then they don't need to. They don't need to worry about the LoA going after him, because clearly if his 'grandfather' needs to make a clone of Damian in order to take him out, then whatever it was that Damian Wayne was doing to keep himself safe, was working.

"Wayne already has people in his corner, he's got Gotham's army of vigilantes to keep himself safe." his brother says with his eyes as blue as moonlight. "You, however. Do not." And he continues, and says that if Damian Wayne has the same training as Damian does, then he will be fine. He doesn't need to be aware of his clone. Because if DW doesn't know about Damian, then the LoA doesn't either.

And here's the thing. Damian would not have survived in the LoA for long. Not as a clone. No matter what, he was going to die no matter what he did, and sooner rather than later. The sword of Damocles was always hanging above his head in the League of Assassins.

That portal, and meeting Danny, saved his life. There's no way around it. And to an extent Damian knows this even at six years old. He may not be aware that he would've died, but he knows that meeting Danny was the best thing to happen to him.

It's no wonder after that, that Damian is as clingy to Danny as he is. Danny is the first person he's met to offer him unconditional love, with no strings attached, only pure affection.

#dpxdc #dp x dc #dp x dc crossover #dpdc #dpxdc crossover #clone^2 #like god can you imagine how scared he must've been? how afraid? he just wants his mom - only to realize he doesnt even matter to her #dpxdc au #danny fenton is not the ghost king #this poor kid man. no wonder he latched onto danny the moment he gave up on the league like a leech. he's a six year old kid man and #it doesnt matter how smart he is or how mature he acts. he still is six years old. he still needs that validation and affection from adults #or from people older than him. and his emotional needs were just not being met in the league. #cue the song “two” from sleeping at last - some of their songs are very clone^2 honestly. #'sweetheart you look a little tired. when did you last eat? come in and make yourself right at home. stay as long as you need.' #'tell me is something wrong? if something's wrong you can count on me' #'its okay if you can't find the words. let me take your coat and this weight off of your shoulders' #'like a force to be reckoned with. am i the ocean or a gentle kiss. i will love you with every single thing i have' #'like a tidal wave i'll make a mess. or calm waters if that serves you best' #'i will love you without any strings attached' #like just. just *imagine* being in damian's shoes during all of this. he's *six* you guys. i've worked with six year olds and they're #pretty independent but they're still six. they get excited when they see their parents and they get upset when an adult is angry with them. #they're still developing their motor skills. they're still developing everything else!

[anna-scribbles]

congrats dr. swift on the new lovesquare album 

(lyrics from labyrinth by taylor swift) 

#feeling REALLY normal tonight thanks for asking #I. I need to go to sleep #truly unhinged of her to make me stay up till 4am tonight #and then have to wake up at 8 for the music video. doesnt she know I work on fridays #INSANE #anyway this is a marinettecore song. like. indisputable. #i'd write an essay rn but just look at the art. ill write essays later #goodnight #ml #miraculous ladybug #ladynoir #ladybug #chat noir #taylor swift #ts #my art #midnights #strikeback

[witchspeka]

I love my girl Miwa but as soon as I read that this image immediately popped up in my head:

#HAVE SOME STANDARDS GIRL DAMN #i want this relationship to work out too but this aint it #how do we relationship #cine te a intrebat #uhmmm theres SPOILERS past this tag in case u care to read this yourself just a quick warning #i kid i joke but this scene fucks me up i like how this manga handles queerness. it shows how messy and painful it can be #like we already got a bit of that with sae and her relationship with sex but this mmmmmm this one i didnt see coming #imagine u work up the courage to confess to ur high school crush and she says she cant date you #not cause she doesnt like you. quite literally /because/ she likes you and wants to take ur relationship seriously and respect you #but she cant do that. because shes afraid of people finding out. of having to hide all the time. of being ostracised. she's tired. #she cant find the strength to do that. #the frustration of being loved but society denying you the possibility of being together... ill clown on Miwa (its very easy) but i feel bad #for her #gaud i need to sleep hai pa

[mae-i-scribble]

tonight i was thinking about orv’s theme about how yjh as a character, and to a larger extent people, will in some ways always be unknowable. (orv spoilers following, read at your own risk)

i feel like i’ve seen a few posts on here that somewhat take this theme to an extreme, leaning *hard* into that “kdj doesn’t actually know yjh like at all” which while on the right track, i feel completely misses the point. Orv goes out of its way to showcase that kdj actually understands yjh to a scary degree, even once they’re out of the early scenarios and the gap between kdj’s knowledge and yjh’s personhood grows larger, there are still things about yjh that *only* kdj can fundamentally understand. And I don’t think that the novel does anything to discredit that understanding, only says that there is much more to yjh. In the same manner, even if you’ve known someone for years, spent all your time with them, there can and will always be new things for you to learn about them. The danger that orv speaks of is trusting in that assumption, that your understanding will be enough and you don’t have to keep an eye out for more developments. That the person you know will forever stay the same. And this isn’t a kdj problem either, fundamentally a lot of the big disagreements that happen between kdj and yjh in the latter half of the novel are born from both of them misconstruing what the other is thinking, trusting that their understanding of the other is deep enough to base their judgements off of. (Post first murim destruction, divorce arc, yjh thinking kdj scattered his soul on purpose, etc.)

As always with orv’s themes, we can view it in a meta sense as well. Kdj’s understanding of yjh as a character is so complete that it’s nearly flawless- until the story begins to deviate and a yjh grows outside the parameters that kdj’s judgements are based on. Even before then, there was always more to yjh- but as readers, we can only understand a character as much as we see them. What you come away with from a story is your complete understanding, there is no growth outside of those boundaries because then it wouldn’t be an understanding of *that* character, you would be putting your own ideas and such into it. But talk to another person, and suddenly the same character you understand so clearly becomes someone else. Talk to the author, and they say something completely different. And can one truly claim to understand a character when the story will never talk about them in every conceivable way? What does it take to truly understand such a thing? Learning that 1863rd round hsy wrote ways of survival with such limited resources and knowledge on who yjh even is, and yet despite it all, still manages to write a story that captures so much of his essence. As orv readers, we know it isn’t everything- it could never encapsulate all of yjh, but the idea that even when one knows nearly nothing, you can still put on a facade of understanding.

We can get into a chicken or the egg argument with this, as 1863!hsy dictates how yjh acts with her writing, and that yjh in the 1863rd round is the one she comes to know before ever starting this story, but when it comes to this theme of the unknowable in the people around us, I don’t think this sort of debate is worth much. We know that yjh exists outside the story written, and how much of him is determined by hsy’s writing is negligible because no matter what, he always grows beyond it. Whether as 1864 or secretive plotter, it all comes back to that same point of there is always more to see within a person.

I don’t know quite where I want to go with this, only that I wanted an outlet for some of these thoughts inside my head, but one of the best things about this theme for me is how it answers itself. When the people around you become unrecognizable, what should you do? And orv says to reach out. To try. To understand. Kdj loses access to omniscient reader several times but always, always gains it back in orv (as far as i remember), because at the end of the day, he is not someone who stays trapped in his idea of who he knows yjh to be. Yjh too, even at the end of orv, is trying to learn more and more about kdj. Only when you are willing to hear out the other person, to learn about them every day, does this unknowable aspect become something less daunting.

#orv #omniscient reader #omniscient readers viewpoint #kim dokja #yoo joonghyuk #joongdok #meta #analysis #it just kinda ended up kdj and yjh focused because this is what the theme is most applicable too #i wish i had more thoughts on how 1863 wrote WoS bc that definitely fits in here more than what i said about it #i think too it can be applied to ysa and kdj #while not as relevant as it is with yjh since their relationship doesnt stretch back as far #they still spend so much of this novel learning more and more about each other #compared to back at minosoft where at least to me it looked like they already had an idea of who the other was as a person #so sorry if this is disjointed i need to stop writing meta as 3 am #in my defense its the only time my thoughts come out like this #on the verge of sleep #orv spoilers #omniscient reader spoilers #i forgot them early on my bad

[littlelightfish]

This half-foot. Dandan.

Looks preety similar to this lady here (I'll put them together so you see):

Half-lidded eyes, black hair&eyes, small eyebrows, curly hair... Dandan's skin is lighter probably because of low sun exposure (dungeon), and he has tons of freckles because he preety.

This two are clearly relatives if not siblings.

Flertom is a mirror image of the lady up there. She got Chil's eyes. She even has almost the same haircut (a bit longer). She's clearly the mother. We've solved Chilchuck's wife mystery.

But this wasn't what I was going to say.

This implies that Wife and Dandan both knew Chilchuck since their childhood. Because there's no way that Chil was just friend of the sister. They're both close to the same age, and I'll say Dandan is a Younger sibiling (she gives big sis vibes, and he gives young bro vibes). So either she introduced him to her brother or he introduced him to his sister and they became best friends as kids.

Could you imagine how their relationship was after Chil's Wife left him?

He knows he has to say something, but he doesn't want to end his relationships. At the end he takes his sister's side. He distances a bit from Chilchuck, calling him an "aquitance" rather than a friend. It isn't that he hates him, is just that it's complicated. And they both know it. They're in good terms tho, they just aren't best friends anymore and they don't talk about it. Their worry is the guild, not their personal stuff.

That's why Dandan introduces Chilchuck to Laios. If they were in bad terms, he would've suggested any other half-foot. They both priorize the guild and general safety of their own race. That's why Dandan suggests Chil instead of a less experienced hafling. He cares about the union and respects Chil's time and experience in dungeons. They're on good terms, at least good enough. Summing up, I get the feeling Dandan doesn't particularly likes Chil after what happened with his sister, but he respects him at least.

#hi fandom its me again overanalyzing side characters from 5 panels alone and some background context! <3 #i will do this again.. eventually... not on dandan. this is all i could see in him ;( #also i think their relationship gets better as time passes #it's been 4 years since wife left him #and 5 years since half-foot union was formed #i'm a wife×chilchuck lover. i'll believe they talked about it and eventually (give them a year) got back together #and Dandan allows himself to be friends with Chil again so he doesnt feel he's bettaying his sis by doing so or sth. #human interactions are so complicated.. i love them.. fascinating... eeling like Kabru. ill put them in a jar and study them like bugs. #Dandan #Dandan dungeon meshi #dungeon meshi #dunmeshi #delicious in dungeon #i need an oficial name for Wife. i need. #i have the feeling Wife's older because they got married quite young. and Dandan seems the same age as Chil. #if anything hes younger. idk. tgeres no way shes marrying at 12 (chil married at 13 and dandan is same age) #this is my theory #idk how they are i insist. im working with crumbs here. #chilchuck #chilchuck tims #chilchuck dungeon meshi #i need to get some sleep lol #my shit #dungeon meshi spoilers

[candyredappledragon]

...uhm. i got bored with homework that i played with furret for like an hour. i think.

oops.

#rotomblr #pkmn irl #art tag #i need to go outside anyway. i feel a bit woozy. so some fresh air would be good! #i cant stay outside too long. carmine doesnt want me to be outside for more than one hour. #she said im in trouble because of my sleep. #man... #// ooc: I'm back on my one layer drawings tomfoolery. :pensive:

[dizzybizz]

marcille dungeon meshi?

THE WAY I JUMPED UP IN MY CHAIR WITH GLEE OMG I LOVE HER BUT I SCARED MY CAT AND GOT MY DAD ASKING IF I WAS OKAY FROM DOWNSTAIRS anyways early marcille is very funny to me and i love her <333

#guys is it obvious i got just a few hours of sleep or. #i wanna do more right now but i need to get to bed at a reasonable time sorry girlies ill get to yall tomorrow :'-(( #this doesnt look like her. AT ALL #if i wasnt so sleepdeprived and whatever i would start over and get her face down properly but alas #once i catch up with dunmeshi its over for. me and yall and everyone #dungeon meshi #marcille donato #my art #uhm yeah no i think i need sleep. its worse than i thought uhm yeah #marcille is one of those characters that spins around in my head. like most of the dunmeshi cast. theyre very spinnable methinks

[skunkes]

almost fell asleep on my parents bed in front of the heater after coming back in from the cold so i drew talon doing the same

#a doodley #legs hanging off the edge bc you do a backwards flop onto the bed do u understand me #also i like the thot of some vampires Lazarus Reflexing if they do sleep #which they dont need to but i like to think talon getting into the habit of napping is like #when people feel safe enough in their environment to sleep more; to sleep Enough #he doesnt Need sleep but its social...also Nice and Warm #and a good compromise between always being awake with your thoughts and vampire coma-ing for hundreds of years to avoid em #he's wearing 3 layers of shirts btw. still not enough he's sooo cold

[kangals]

i think the main difference in personality so far between puppy-stellina and puppy-kepler is that kep has a lot more patience.

that brings a lot of positive qualities: he has better emotional control and is less prone to tantrums and outbursts than stellina was (i.e. if i have to stop for 10 seconds on a walk to pick up poo, stellina would yelp and pull and cry at being asked to stop). it also means he has better focus and is more forgiving of repetition in training - he doesn't give up nearly as easily when frustrated. and things that may startle or scare him he's more willing to try again or overcome (e.g. he slipped on my stairs and hurt his foot and didn't want to go back up the stairs for a few days, but eventually started trying again. and when butters slaps him he yelps and backs off, but still thinks she's Super Fun and tries to make friends). so he's a bit more methodical in his thinking.

but it does also bring some negatives too: because he has patience, he does not give up once he's decided something. if stellina was overtired and i put her in a crate, she'd fuss for a minute then pretty quickly go "hm alright then" and go to sleep. if i do the same to kep, he fights it and fights it because he doesn't want to be asleep and that's that. he's much more difficult to redirect or distract, and i have to be a lot more mindful of managing him because once he's decided something is fun or tasty or whatever it takes a lot to dissuade him, and he'll go back to it at the first chance. he's very slow to learn boundaries as a result - i have to do a lot more convincing than i'm used to.

they are still overall very similar personalities, especially as they're the same breed and from very similar lines, but i think so far this has been the biggest quality that i've needed to adjust to. puppy-stellina i had to do a lot of mental adjustments learning how to manage her short emotional threshold and sensitivity, so it's interesting to see what does and doesn't translate over to kep.

#i hesitate to use the word 'stubborn' for kep bc i truly dont think its willful 'oh youve told me no but i will do it anyway' #he just genuinely doesnt get the concept of 'please dont do that' #'dont do thing? but thing is fun. thing is for kep. kep will do. fun!' #the concept of 'i am not allowed to do this' or 'i should not do this' has never occured to him #like with house training: he knows that he gets praise and treats for going outside. he knows that this doesnt happen if he goes inside. #but the concept of 'i have to poop and am inside therefore i should instead go outside' hasnt clicked yet bc he will just always take- #-the first option (poop now) #same thing with sleeping (i do not want to sleep therefore i will Not) and biting stellina etc #its not bad! as mentioned theres a lot of positives it brings too. i just need to learn how to speak his specific language #and when youre bad at dog training it just takes a while lol

[shepards-folly]

WHO NEEDS GOD WHEN YOU CAN BE WORSHIPPED LIKE ONE?!

#shep arts #content smp #csmp #doctor4t #this was supposed to go up after i finished it but again i went back to sleep so uhm good morning part two here's more contentsmp #my friend said it was a crime for me to draw arathain without R4T cause i talk about them together so much #anyway lol drew this really quick so it doesnt parallel arathains properly also its just kinda wack in some places #i think they were just teasing me but i mean yeah.. I cannot shut the fuck up about them once i get started #honestly i still have no idea how to draw R4T... I think this is like the third time I've drawn him :/ #scratch that actually i dont know how to draw anyone on the csmp and thats a sin I need to atone for #we'll see if i draw more lol. i keep going I should draw this and then not drawing that at all #typical neurodivergent swag moment tbh #btw the caption is roughly taken from attention seeking demon by winchifrost #i think that's the lyric but tbh rn all the stuff bouncing around my head are all just song lyrics but a bit wrong so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[b4kuch1n]

see, dearest, loving me did not save you. you scraped by just fine without. but it doesn’t hurt, does it?

#pokemon #swsh #professor sonia #gym leader nessa #aquaheartshipping #sonessa #hi. this is pre-dr.jones!sonia and callie!nessa btw #doesnt affect the piece much but I just want u to know #I love that potc made up the whole davy jones/calypso thing and I ate that shit up unquestioned #dont care it slaps it means everything to me now. next #litcherally used those vibes for like anything I can I just think that should be a thing more #but also! the original dr.jones!sonia joke has like seven extremely stupid layer that make it very dear to me #so Im not willing to let go yet. even tho dr. jones is now technically involved in a tentative thing I have on the side #along with the other two (gun haveman and the cloudwalker) #this is actually! kind of a color study again. but also I just really wanna draw the girls #I think Im just gonna spend october drawing critters and the kids in costumes. I need it #this is hopefully the first! I'll try to unclench my brain and let it do its stuff #now tho? I sleep #tomorrow I have a promising dinner to look forward to. and the next day? noodles #have a good weekend lads! doesnt hurt to have a bit of love on ur side

[eepyracc]

Lnds fandom.. how are we feeling 🧍‍♀️

Because I for one, am absolutely losing it

#the lore drop was insane #where do i even begin #I NEED to know more about Zayne's research WHAT DID HE DISCOVER THAT MADE HIM STOP AND DESTROY EVERYTHING #THE JEREMIAH BACKSTORY??? #Xavier sleeps inside the spaceship to feel a bit at home.. #Ever group crumbs bwjdhwu #MC BEING EXPERIMENTED ON AS A KID CONFIRMED #altho she doesnt remember she suffered SO MUCH imagine toying with life like that #killing her over and over again without never truly being sure if she'd actually come back #so the aether protocore was DISCOVERED inside of her? not implemented in her heart #i need to understand how rafayels heart the aether core the core of philos and the creatio core are related #rafayel being offended that hes only ranked 6th made me giggle ngl #anyway brb imma cry some more #the fact that Philosians (??) need to take some potion? med? to stay alove cuz their bodies are wearing out im not okay #xavy baby dont die on me #and the fact that Ever group is spying on him though his comrades #and the fact that mc is on Ever's list or whatever #just wtf #lnds #xavier love and deepspace #zayne love and deepspace #rafayel love and deepspace

[baldurs-gate-official]

Thinking about how Astarion insisted on staying up to keep watch in the beginning of the game

Yeah, it could be because he needs to go hunt at night without anyone noticing, or because he's keeping an eye out for Cazador/his minions. But... It could also be because he's scared of sleeping/trancing in general?

He's got severe C-PTSD. I have that too. And one of the things I experience from it is a fear of falling asleep.

Sleeping is vulnerability. You're completely defenseless. It's terrifying to fall asleep when you're used to danger! And some abusers will purposefully do things to you when you sleep. I wouldn't put it past Cazador to have done something like that.

It's especially terrifying when you're sleeping somewhere unfamiliar, or as out and open as a forest. With strangers.

Add in the elvish reverie (if we assume Astarion still experiences it as he would if he were alive at his current age)... and he might even be reliving horrible memories every time he tries to rest.

(If you're unfamiliar with elvish trancing/dreaming, I made a post about it and some ways it might affect Astarion as a vampire spawn a while ago)

One of the reasons I think this could be the case is actually the other spawn, specifically what I noticed when we first meet Dalyria and Petras. At first I thought Astarion's eye bags were just a product of being undead. But... Petras, the very human looking spawn, doesn't have that. Dalyria is an elf as well, and like Astarion, she's got some of that tired sleep-deprived purple under and around her eyes.

So all this considered... I think it's very possible that Astarion has a fear of sleeping too. Or at the very least, trouble resting. Him and the other elvish spawn.

It also makes me wonder if he sleeps any better later on in the game. By Act 3 he probably feels more comfortable with you and the group. Sleeping near familiar people (especially people you're very comfortable with, but that's very dependant on your own choices in your game), and having established night time routines can make sleeping feel a little safer.

Plus by that point he's made many new memories he can visit in his reverie. Maybe instead of remembering the terrible things, sometimes he dreams of sun bathing, the first time he bit you or that bear, or any other happy memory he's created since being tadpoled.

Maybe for the first time in centuries, sleeping isn't such a terrible prospect.

#bg3 #astarion #text post #its just something thats been on my mind #my fear of sleep is bad enough that i usually cant fall asleep without pushing myself to the point of passing out #or sometimes i need to take a sedative just to manage it #so i wonder how bad it is for him given that he doesnt have the option of sedation #it makes for some interesting headcanons/ideas though #pretty sure a druidic Tav can offer to put together an herbal tea to help him sleep #what if that sort of thing worked and it became a nightly routine? #i assume he can drink tea given that he can drink alcohol #or if you've romanced him #would sleeping near Tav help? #i know sometimes its easier for me to sleep when im around someone im comfortable with #though sometimes it has the opposite effect and it makes it harder to sleep because i feel like i need to be extra alert to protect them #trauma really does a number on you #act 3 spoilers #bg3 act 3 spoilers #astarion spoilers #bg3 spoilers #q