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#the rugby boys are coming home!
malyen0retsev · 2 years
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the actor of otis smith talking about the renewal, when i say the nice rugby boys arc with otis, sai and christian is COMING
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restlessmaknae · 26 days
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red light, green light // park sunghoon
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After summer break and your break-up, it seems that things finally go back to normal. At least, until the first after-match party when in an attempt to save you from your ex, Sunghoon blurts out that you're his girlfriend now, and so, your fake dating starts.
➳ Characters: college rugby player!Sunghoon x cheerleader!female reader/you
➳ Genre: fake dating au, college au, sports au, angst, fluff
➳ Words: 6.2k
➳ Warning: reader is very insecure in the beginning and healing from a toxic relationship; the toxic, manipulative ex is also in the story (named Jaehyeok but he has no connection to any real-life people or characters), mentions of cheating on ex's part, injuries
➳ A/N: This story had the most votes in my recent poll, so here it is. It's also a spin-off to my most popular story 'how to cross the line?' with Jake that takes place before this one, but this story can absolutely be read on its own. ❤️
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After the summer break, you thought that everything bad - including your break-up with Jaehyeok - would be forgotten. As a cheerleader and a college rugby player who had gotten together over the spring term, and had broken up close to finals, you had been the talk of town until everyone had gone home for the break. There had been a pleasantly short amount of time between the break-up and summer break with no football matches afterwards, so no way to see him up-front when he had been the last person you had wanted to see.
With the autumn term coming, it seemed to be true, and you couldn’t have been happier. The summer months weren’t enough to pick yourself up after the break-up, but they were enough to try to pick yourself up. He had humiliated you in front of his team members, and even though they didn’t look at you any differently, you could feel the lingering gazes on you two when Jaehyeok decided to sit beside you at the first after-match party of the season.
“Oooh, are you guys getting back together?” One of the boys cooed, laughing into his hands as if he had discovered the rumour of the century.
“We’re just being friendly to each other, you know,” Jaehyeok replied with a mellifluous smile, one that you had naively fallen for last semester. Now, you could see how well-practised this was, just like so many of his lines and his whole good boy behaviour. He was perfect only on the surface, he was rotten on the inside.
You could feel the overly curious eyes on you, hungry for an answer, for some drama like hawks circling around their prey. Too bad how fitting it was for those around you to be playing for the Hybe Hawks, they were predators when it came to your love life, and it had been the same when you had been together.
You forced a smile onto your face, nodding without saying a word and looking for a way out when Jay inquired if anyone wanted more meat, and you had never been more relieved in your life. If there were guys in the rugby team who were far from the rest, it would be Jake, Jay and Sunghoon. Those three were the ones who didn’t want to mingle with the others’ drama, and for that reason, you hadn’t really interacted with them before this semester because if you had hung out with other players from the team before, they had always been Jaehyeok’s friends. Now, however, they were the only ones who didn’t want to pick you apart since the break-up.
You tried to keep it in, you tried to conceal your feelings, while the conversation moved on, but when Jaehyeok put a piece of meat onto your plate without you asking him to, the weight on your shoulders doubled. It felt like you were trying to hold up too much, and all that weight could collapse onto you any minute, so to avoid that, you haphazardly excused yourself, saying that you didn’t feel well after drinking.
You threw your bag over your shoulder and exited the BBQ restaurant, the gazes of the athletes and cheerleaders searing into your back. You held onto the strip of your bag even tighter, trying to ground yourself to something real, something that you could control. You were so naive, really. How could you even assume that they could move on from your break-up and not bring it up anymore? How could you even assume that Jaehyeok would change, and bear the consequences of his actions when he had been the one saying those nasty things about you? You had been so stupid, so naive, so…
“Y/N!”
Jaehyeok’s all too familiar voice calling your name made your knees weak for a moment before you snapped yourself back to reality, reminding yourself that it was who he was, it was how he lured people in. You couldn’t believe in his sweet words anymore.
So you picked up your pace and walked even faster, but the red lights at the pedestrian crossing forced you to stop, to look at him when he halted beside you, and to listen to his mellifluous words.
“Hey! What was that about before? I just want us to be cool with each other after you called it quits.”
That was the problem with Jaehyeok. When you looked at these - this scene, his words, the cool expression on his face - from an outsider’s point of view, everything seemed ideal, almost perfect. Yet, when you were the one inside of it, you knew how that illusion of perfection casted its shadow onto you; how you felt suffocated under it, desperately trying to hold onto it because just as he had said it about you to his friends, you had been nothing without him. If you had not gotten together with him during the first semester, no one would have taken note of your existence. Even if you had been in the cheerleading team, the girls had started talking to you only after Jaehyeok had done the same.
And this… this is what Jaehyeok had done disgustingly well: to raise you up, to make you feel special, so you wouldn’t leave his side. Too bad you had caught him telling the other guys the same once and catching him kissing some girl at an after-match party another time. You hadn’t supposed to be there at the party, that’s true, since the group work meeting you would have gone to had been cancelled last minute, but to see him shove his tongue down another girl’s throat while murmuring to her that he would break up with you soon, so she shouldn’t worry had made you frozen on the spot. You wouldn’t have it in you to confront him on the spot, so you had left the party almost as soon as you had gotten there, tears pricking your ears, and the only person who had asked you if you had been alright was Sunghoon when you had managed to bump into him while exiting the scene.
The flashbacks poured onto you one after another, and you could feel your hands shaking by your sides while you were momentarily reliving them.
“You would have broken up with me anyway, we both know that,” you pointed out rather indignantly, desperately glancing side-ways to see how much more time you needed to wait for the lights to turn green.
35 more seconds…
“Well, yeah, but that doesn’t mean you should act all weird when we’re beside each other. Just because you’ve prioritised school over dates with me doesn’t make me a bad guy,” he justified all too innocently, and there it was again: turning the tables around, making you feel small, blaming you for what happened. Blaming you for not having enough time for him, so he had to kiss other girls.
20 more seconds…
“It’s not like I don’t see you talking more with Jay, Jake and Sunghoon since we broke up,” Jaehyeok spitted as if he couldn’t just let it be, and you balled your hands into fists, your nails digging into your skin.
15 more seconds….
Yeah, the only ones who were willing to speak to you after the break-up, god forbid you didn’t tell them off, you thought to yourself.
“I’ve been talking to them since we broke up, not before. There’s a difference between what you did and how I've been talking to guys ever since.”
“And besides, she’s her own person, she can do what she wants,” a voice from behind meddled with the tension hanging over you and Jaehyeok, and as he stepped beside you, so he would come between you and your ex, it felt a bit like he was shielding you. Both figuratively and literally.
You would have recognised that slender build of his, the fringe in his eyes and the depth of his voice anywhere, and even though it was Park Sunghoon out of all people, you didn’t mind that he was the one who showed up. You had no idea whether it had anything to do with the fact that he had seen you exit that ominous after-match party with teary eyes, but even if it was pity, you could take it given the circumstances.
“What do you know, man?”
“I know everything,” Sunghoon stated sternly, keeping eye-contact with Jaehyeok who furrowed his eyebrows in question. Even though you clearly doubted that he knew everything, he announced it so confidently that you would have believed him all the same, and you could feel the same coming from Jaehyeok, too. “I would appreciate it if you didn’t bother her anymore. She’s my girlfriend now.”
The way Sunghoon declared it so matter-of-factly rendered you speechless, and you just stood there, frozen, and even though people started crossing the street, you totally forgot about the lights turning green. It felt as if the whole world stopped all at once, and yet, a sort of warmth peeked through the rain clouds, as if a ray of hope found its way through all the dirt.
Given that you didn’t argue with Sunghoon’s statement because you were too shocked yet numb to do so, Jaehyeok believed it. Though he clearly looked like he didn’t want to believe it.
“Sure. Congrats on getting her. It’s not like I would ever want her back,” Jaehyeok exclaimed a little too frustrated as his last words before turning around and heading back to the restaurant.
You watched him go with a mix of rage and relief, then, your eyes searched Sunghoon’s who was already looking at you. He was nibbling on his lower lip, awfully nervous for someone who had just bluffed about being your boyfriend, and the calm facade of his broke when he spoke up:
“I’m so sorry about this. I didn’t know what else to say to make him go away,” he mumbled, coy and guilty, but you could only care about the kindness lacing his words, and the genuine care in his eyes. You didn’t know him well enough to draw conclusions, but based on your previous encounters with him, you would say that it took him some courage to walk up to you two like that and to save you from the situation with a lie.
So you felt even more grateful for his interruption, and you didn't even want him to think otherwise.
“No, really, it’s… it’s fine. Thanks for that,” you blurted out, equally as uncertain what to say. Sunghoon’s eyes slipped from your face to your hands, and that’s when you realised that your hands were still shaking.
“Did he…” He breathed out, shaky and worried, before pointing at your hands. “Did he do anything to you?”
You could feel how difficult it was for him to say the words, and the weight his question carried was heavy, his question loaded. It made his earlier act less surprising for he could even assume that Jaehyeok would dare to do something like that.
“No, he didn’t do anything like that. It was just… his words as always…”
“Those matter, too,” Sunghoon whispered, somewhat to himself, before looking around. You didn’t know what he was thinking or what he was trying to do, but the lights were red for the third time you were here, so you couldn’t go on your way either way.
When Sunghoon turned back to you, he examined your expression before averting his eyes to your hands again. He could see that your hands were less shaky but you still fumbled with them to ease your nerves, and maybe that’s what prompted him to announce:
“I will go back to the dorms with you. I don’t want you to be alone after this.”
You were so shocked by his gentleness that you couldn’t form proper words, so you just nodded and crossed the street beside him when the lights turned green.
It’s safe to say that you didn’t think about the consequences of your actions - or should you say Sunghoon’s actions? - because by the next day, everyone had gotten to know that you were Sunghoon’s girlfriend (which, in fact, you weren’t) thanks to Jaehyeok gossiping. The cheerleading group chat exploded with questions and next day’s rugby practice was all about the so-called news, so you had to have an emergency meeting with Sunghoon at the end of the day.
You were in the corridor leading to the business department’s simulation labs, and since those were for societies and extra-curricular workshops, you knew that it would be rare to bump into anyone around here. So it was just the two of you, sitting on a hallway bench, the air somewhat more troubled than the day before.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t think it would come to this,” Sunghoon broke the silence almost immediately, his voice deep and worn. He couldn’t look you in the eye, instead, he was playing with his fingers and staring far ahead.
“It’s okay, really,” you tried to reassure him as best as you could. “I’ve been through this before. It gets better after a week,” you shrugged nonchalantly, forcing yourself to avoid having flashbacks of the time you and Jaehyeok had gotten together.
Sunghoon let out a shaky breath hearing that, and you could feel that he was about to say something, but when he turned towards you with his body, he didn’t say anything. Expectant, you looked at him, locking eyes with him, and for a moment, you had a feeling that you might burst into tears. He looked at you so worried, so gentle, as if he was ready to start a revolution for you, it opened a hidden locker in your heart that had never experienced such kindness coming from a boy.
“Are you really okay?” He inquired quietly, barely audible, and it didn’t slip your attention that he glanced down at your hands resting in your lap before looking into your eyes again.
“I’m as fine as I can be. If I’m not fine, it’s not because of this situation, but because of Jaehyeok, so really, don’t beat yourself up about it.”
“Do you want to keep this up? Our… fake relationship?” He hesitated a bit before continuing, and you found it adorable how his ears turned red when he babbled the word ‘relationship’ out loud.
“If you don’t mind,” you answered, giving him the chance to back out because you didn’t want him to tie himself to you over an attempt to save you from your douchebag ex.
Sunghoon’s eyes widened, almost comically, as if it hurt him to hear such a suggestion. Then, he held up his hands in front of his chest, waving them in heavy opposition.
“No, no, I don’t.”
“Okay, I just wanted to make sure,” you let out a little chuckle seeing his objection, and the boy still blinked at you, albeit a bit shyly now.
So you went on to discuss that you would keep up this fake relationship, but nothing was forced. If either of you wanted to put an end to it, the other one would agree immediately. There were no forced dates or social media posts or appearances, just whatever you were comfortable with. You exchanged contacts, so you would be able to keep in touch without having to wait for the other after practices or matches. Speaking of which, you told Sunghoon that you would quit the cheerleading team, and even though he was worried that it was because of him and this whole fake dating thing, you were quick to reassure him that it had nothing to do with it. You merely didn’t enjoy it anymore, and it’s not like you had any supportive friends there.
Hearing that, the boy seemed quite disheartened as if he had any say in how the girls in the team acted. Instead, when you brought up the fact that you could still join any dance-related club because it was early into the semester, and they were still recruiting members, he mentioned that Jake’s girlfriend was a member of a dance club.
“Oh really? Which one?”
“Well, that… I don’t know which one,” he admitted, scratching the back of his neck sheepishly. You let out a giggle seeing his reaction; the way his face changed from enthusiastic to confused so quickly. People might have said that he had a stern face, but you would object. He might have seemed nonchalant and icy to some, but when someone got into a conversation with him, all of these different sides of him surfaced, and you realised that you liked discovering the Sunghoon that not everyone had the chance to know.
“It’s okay, you can let me know once you get to know about it,” you pointed out with a smile as you reminded him that you now had each other’s contact. His shoulders easened and he let his lips curl upwards seeing your smile.
You talked a bit more before you suggested going back to the dorms. Sunghoon offered to walk back with you since he was also heading that way, and you didn’t want to tell him that it didn’t even cross your mind that you would go separately after last time.
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You were right, the heightened attention that you got because Jaehyeok had told the others that you were dating Sunghoon died down after a week or so. You quit the cheerleading team in the meantime, so you were out of their group chat too, and that probably added to the sudden lack of questions. You had some glances from people who knew who you were, but otherwise, things went back to normal. To be precise, almost normal.
Though you had no idea what to consider fake-dating Park Sunghoon to be. It was definitely not your usual way of doing things, but Jaehyeok backed off ever since Sunghoon’s lie, and it’s not like the boy forced anything onto you. In fact, he was the most considerate soul ever. He indeed asked Jake which dance club his girlfriend went to, and you joined the same after the boys introduced you two to each other. It was nice to get to know someone who was close to the boys, and who definitely didn’t make you feel small after getting to know about your deal with Sunghoon. Ajung knew about it because Sunghoon’s friends were the only ones who knew, but she wasn’t weirded out by it.
You got to know about how they had known each other with Jake, how they had gotten together, and she also shared how it felt to date one of the rugby players. She had a different experience to yours because she wasn’t a cheerleader, but she still got stares and hateful messages. At the end of the day, what mattered to her was that Jake loved her, and she had never questioned his loyalty.
“I guess it’s because I could never imagine him meeting other girls behind my back that I don’t take those messages to heart,” Ajung admitted once, and it dawned on you that you had felt insecure in your relationship with Jaehyeok because you had been afraid he had been meeting other girls. You had been right, but still; just the fact that you could have imagined him cheating on you should have been a major red flag.
On the other hand, you couldn’t imagine the same about Sunghoon. Even if you were technically not together, the boy made sure time and time again that he was fine with it and wasn’t meeting other girls. So when he went to the after-match parties without you because you didn’t feel like going anymore, you weren’t afraid that he was kissing other girls. Which was a surprising realisation to come to, because one would think that you lost all hope in trusting guys after Jaehyeok. Maybe it would have been true had it been for someone else, but you trusted Sunghoon. Even more so because he was always on your side, even if it meant getting into a fight with Jaehyeok after his rugby practice.
You were studying in the library after classes, and you knew that Sunghoon was supposed to finish around this time, so you shot him a message, only to be left on read for half an hour. Hence, you packed up your stuff and went back to the dorms, not wanting to force anything onto the boy.
However, almost as soon as you arrived at the dorms, you got a message from Jake, saying that you should probably talk to Sunghoon because he had a rough day. He was out with Ajung, but Sunghoon would probably be in their dorm room, so you could talk to him in private.
You didn’t need to be told twice; you walked up to the boys’ dorm room (knowing all too well where they lived in the halls since walking back to the dorms together became a habit of yours), and knocked on their door. You didn’t get an answer, so you messaged the boy again. You started getting worried when Sunghoon suddenly showed up in the corridor, already changed back into his usual jeans, a tee and a cardigan thrown over it. When he caught sight of you in front of their door, his eyes widened and his lips visibly parted.
On the other hand, you had the same reaction, but not because of his presence, it was because of the bruise around his lips and on his jaw. It didn’t look like he had hurt himself during practice as you had been familiar with those kinds of injuries due to Jaehyeok. It looked like he had been in a fight.
“Oh my gosh, Sunghoon! Are you okay?” You immediately went up to him, checking on his bruises from closer, yet not touching him because you didn’t want to be invasive. So you looked up at him, waiting for him to reply, but instead of words, he closed the distance between you two and hugged you.
You were so bewildered that you just stood there, blinking rapidly, and you could neither say anything, nor do anything. Your heart, on the other hand, was beating so erratically, you were afraid that it would jump out of your ribcage.
“I’m sorry.”
“For what?” You asked, totally confused, while you hugged the boy back. As you laced your arms around his waist, you could feel the boy tense a bit, probably unprepared for you hugging him back, but he eased into your touch a few seconds later.
“For what you had to deal with beside Jaehyeok,” he explained gently, quietly like a confession, murmuring the words into your hair. You were so used to words that cut like a knife that his words - that were like a soothing cream on a bruised heart - felt like a remedy, the boy tending to your broken heart with only a few syllables, a few breaths of words.
You hugged him back tighter, stronger, a silent response to his sentence, and soaked up this warmth, this comforting feeling for a few seconds before you took a step back and pulled yourself out of the hug. You looked up at him, heart churning at the sight but even more so when your hunch was proven right.
“Was it his doing?” You asked as you pointed at his face, and the boy didn’t need to be asked twice. He nodded, but there was no remorse in his tone when he spoke up.
“I was the one who punched him first. I couldn’t just stand what he was saying about you. He is so-”
“I know,” you cut him off, knowing all too well that whatever he was going to say was something you already knew. Instead, you asked if he had treated his bruises already (though it didn’t seem like it), and when he confirmed that he hadn’t, yet he had bought some antiseptic and plasters from the pharmacy, you offered to help him tend to his wound.
He seemed startled for a few seconds, but didn’t object. He let you inside their dorm room instead, and pushed a few things off his study desk, so he could put down his bag and get the pharmacy’s plastic bag out of it. He fumbled a bit with the bag before he reached it out to you, and just stood there as if he didn’t know what to do himself until you told him that it would probably be better if you both sat down because you know, he was quite tall…
“Oh yeah, right… sorry,” he scratched the back of his neck sheepishly before taking a seat on his bed and pushing a few things onto the edge of his bed, so you could sit beside him comfortably.
You only realised how close you were when you leaned forward to put the antiseptic on the corner of his lip, and you came face-to-face with the moles dotting his face like little black stars on the galaxy of his skin. The shade of his eyes also seemed darker from up close, like the sky when it didn’t yet turn to its darkest, deepest colour, and the way he batted his eyelashes was just as elegant as the boy himself. He seemed so dream-like as he was blinking at your swiftly moving fingers, you were afraid that if you stopped, he would vanish. You wished that you could prolong these moments longer and longer…
Yet, you were finished in no time, and after you put a plaster on the bruise of his jaw, you put everything back into the plastic bag while trying to pacify the crazy beating of your heart. You appreciated that the boy let you do this for him after he had stood up for you even without you being there, and even though he didn’t regret it, you still felt bad for him. He shouldn’t have felt like this was his battle to win, but he was protective over you, more than he should have been given your fake relationship.
“Thank you,” you blurted out as such thoughts circled your mind. “From that after-match party when you asked me if I was okay after seeing Jaehyeok kiss another girl up until today, I feel like you’ve been taking care of me so well, I’m really grateful,” you confessed as you turned towards him again, searching for his eyes.
The boy’s delicate features immediately softened, and you could see it on his face, in his eyes, in the way he held himself that he would have done it again and again if it meant that he could take care of you.
“You deserve it. You really do,” he stated, not leaving room for objection, and that was when it hit you. That emotional overflow that had been building inside of you ever since you had been talking with Sunghoon, and time and time again, he proved to you that you were cared for, and that there were people looking out for you despite what Jaehyeok had been telling you, and that you were your own person, not a nobody.
“Thank you,” you choked out, trying to hold it in, but when tears started prickling your eyes, you knew that it was time to let it all out. So you did, without being ashamed, without feeling weak. This was you, a side of you that you now dared to show the world.
And Sunghoon was there to help you through it all by lending a shoulder to cry on and strong arms to hold you safe and sound, wrapping you up in warmth and comfort.
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Something changed that day, and you could feel the shift in your relationship.
It’s not that you two were cold towards each other before, you were merely more tentative. You appreciated it, the fact that Sunghoon kept his distance, and he was as polite about every little touch, every little action as one could be, but after that night, you started opening up slowly, letting each other in more and more.
It was gradual, of course. With your history with Jaehyeok and Sunghoon’s generally reserved personality, it wasn’t an obvious change from one day to another, but you enjoyed it nevertheless. You enjoyed the walks back to the dorms, the times you spent messaging each other on and off campus, the times when you hang out with him and his friends after matches (instead of hanging out with the cheerleaders and Jaehyeok’s friends), the lunches you grabbed together between classes, and how throughout it all, you got to know that Sunghoon was actually far from quiet when he was around those he was comfortable with.
He was pretty talkative when a topic was brought up that interested him or when he needed to defend his opinion. He was also pretty funny, making funny faces when reacting to certain campus drama and being his extra self when walking into a place where you were waiting for him. He was also very, very caring, but it went without saying by that point; lending you his jacket when autumn arrived with violent winds and unexpected weather conditions from one day to another, buying a drink for you when he knew that you would be staying at the library to study, holding the door for you and offering to bring your books when you were working on an assignment and had to rent a bunch of books for a week, and looking out for your reactions whenever Jaehyeok was brought up in a conversation or the boy was close by.
Actually, with him by your side, it was easier to put your ex in the past; because Sunghoon showed you such a different way of being together with a boy. You were still fake dating, but the way nothing was forced for the sake of social media or the questions of his nosy team members showed you that he would be just as considerate about your feelings and your comfort as if you had been actually dating.
Maybe that’s why it wasn’t that difficult to say yes to a weekend trip to the winter sea with his friends - Jake, Ajung and Jay. It was just the five of you, renting a small apartment for two days and one night in December; two of the boys sharing a room and one of them sleeping on the couch in the living room (it goes without saying that they decided with rock-paper-scissors that it would be Sunghoon on the couch) while you were sharing a room with Ajung.
During the day, you went to the beach to take a long walk alongside the coast, the boys teasing you while splashing water around, taking pictures and having lunch nearby in a cosy little café. You went to a cliff too, Sunghoon reaching his hand out to help you move from one rock to another while walking towards it, and Jake did the same towards Ajung, so Jay was sulking that he was visibly left out. To which, both of the boys joked to offer their help, but Jay just shushed them. They were having too much fun teasing him.
At night, you went to the grocery store and bought ingredients for dinner which you prepared together. To be precise, you weren’t sure Sunghoon was much help as he was singing songs he put on the speakers into a ladle, and Jake was too busy taking pictures of Ajung with a knife (saving it for himself as possible future meme material as he said), but Jay was doing everything so professionally, it seemed like he didn’t need help either way. You tried nevertheless, cutting up the veggies and bringing him stuff from the fridge while he was by the oven, naturally finding something to talk about in the meantime.
“You know, Sunghoon seems happier since you started talking,” he brought it up suddenly while he was stirring the stew. You both glanced in the direction of the boy who was too busy finding a good song to play next, his tongue sticking out in concentration.
“Oh really?” You quirked an eyebrow, feeling a bit shy, because it meant that you had a positive impact on the boy.
“Yeah,” the boy nodded without thinking twice about it. “I’ve never seen him date a girl, but even if you are fake-dating, I think that’s what he would act like,” he added seriously, and there was no hint of mischief in his eyes, hence, you believed him. At least, you wanted to believe him.
However, you had no idea what to say to that, so you just nodded, and as your eyes glanced in the boy’s direction yet again, your heart did a little somersault. Truth to be told, it didn’t really feel like fake-dating at this point because you and Sunghoon actually spent a lot of time together, getting to know each other, and he even invited you for this trip, so that had to mean something. On the other hand, since you hadn’t seen Sunghoon interact with other girls before (except for smiling awkwardly when the cheerleaders had tried to hit on him), you didn’t know how he acted around them.
Nevertheless, you couldn’t keep Jay’s words out of your head for the remaining day, so when it was just the two of you left in the living room as Sunghoon was making his bed (aka his couch) and you were refilling your water bottle, you felt like you had to ask the boy the same.
“Sunghoon…” You started tentatively as you halted beside the couch which was now covered with a bedsheet, a fluffy blanket and a pillow. The boy looked up from his haphazardly made bed, finding your eyes. He tilted his head like he always did when he was confused, but there was a hint of curiosity in his midnight-black orbs.
“Hmm?”
“Jay said that you seem happier since we started talking,” you said it in one-go, fiddling with the protective layer around your water bottle. “Do you agree with him?”
Silence settled over you two after your question, and even though it was probably just a few seconds, your heartbeat felt twice as heavy as before as you were waiting for his answer. Sunghoon’s confused features easened into a more natural state, but there was a hue tinting his cheeks pinkish when he answered:
“Yeah, I’m happier.”
Your shoulders immediately dropped in ease despite the fact that you couldn’t imagine him saying something hurtful even if he might not have agreed with his friend. It’s just… you felt like you hadn’t really been paying attention to his feelings in the beginning of your fake dating since you had been buried under all the hurt from Jaehyeok. When you had managed to pick yourself up from that dark hole, Sunghoon had already been acting the way he did nowadays, so you couldn’t tell whether he was happier or not. Not to mention that you hadn’t really been looking his way in the first semester because you had been dating a different rugby player.
Now though, you couldn’t imagine not seeing him and not looking for him. His presence could always bring a sense of comfort, and he didn’t even have to say anything, you were just fine being beside him. On top of that, you could be yourself beside him, you knew that. He had seen you when you had been vulnerable and torn, and he hadn’t taken advantage of that, nor had he said anything that might have implied that you should change your ways around him.
“Well, me too,” you admitted as your thoughts kept circling back to the warmth he spread, the gratitude he made you feel, the happiness he bloomed in your chest and… to him. “I like you,” you found yourself saying as you overcame with all the emotions leading up to this point, but you immediately bit down on your lower lip when you realised what you had just said.
Sunghoon seemed shocked for a moment, then shy, then baffled again as if he didn’t want to believe his ears.
“Oh, I, well…” He blabbered coyly, not finding the right words to say. Even in this state, you found him cute because he was trying. He was just nervous like you, but you could wait for him to say what he wanted to say. Not like you could budge, you were entranced either way.
Sunghoon cleared his throat to regain his courage, then as he stepped closer to you, he finally said:
“I like you too.”
And then his arms were around you, strong yet gentle, and you inhaled his sandalwood perfume, your heart thumping against your chest, wild and free. You realised then and there that you had been secretly waiting for this moment, and you wanted to stay in it as long as possible.
“So no more fake dating, I assume?” He murmured into your hair, his voice a bit raspy yet laced with joy.
“No more,” you agreed with a slight bob of your head, and let him hug you tighter, stronger as if he never wanted to let you go.
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522 notes · View notes
cosmal · 1 year
Note
waitttt aerial writing poly!marauders?? omg. how about them looking after sick or injured reader I feel like that could be so cute!!!! they’re all worrywart bfs tbh
emergency contact
summary james gets called when you faint at work. and then sirius. then remus. you feel awful
content poly!marauders x fem!reader
note this was combined with another request. I accidentally deleted it I'm super sorry but it was a request for poly x fem!reader where the boys come to your work after fainting!
You feel really embarrassed sitting at the end of the bar, ice pack held to your head, mouth wrapped around the straw in your drink.
Your embarrassment turns to worry when you see James walking across the room. He’s rushing, hair a mess, mud tracked up his calves. He’s still in his rugby kit.
You turn your head to look at your colleague. “Ash, you told me you wouldn’t call anyone!” You’re not really upset, you feel like a bit of a nuisance.
“It’s procedure, Y/N. I’m sorry.” She doesn’t sound very sorry. You don’t blame her.
“Sweetheart,” he says when he reaches you. He’s frantic, soft about it, but still upset. “Are you okay? They told me you fainted.”
“I’m really sorry,” you say instead of a hello. You feel entirely stupid.
“What?” He grasps your shoulder and squeezes hard. “What are you sorry for, honey?”
“I feel bad,” you say quietly, voice a little thick. You screw your face up and your head tinges. A dull pain that radiates down into the back of your skull.
“Please, don’t.” He says. Firm with a hint of worry he’s trying to mask. If James cries you think you might too, and you really wouldn’t put it past him.
You drop the pack to the bar and take his hand, fingers damp with condensation that transfers to his palm. “I’m fine. Promise.”
“You bumped your head?” He uses his free hand to hold your face, careful where he has his fingers. His eyes track over your face to search for any harm. You’re blood-free, luckily, though there’s a red mark blooming up and into your hairline. Most likely to bruise.
“Yeah.” Your eyes flutter closed because you can’t help it.
“You’re not feeling drowsy?” comes James’s voice.
“No, feels nice,” you chuckle, a tiny huff of air. “Your hands are warm.”
You don’t expect it, but suddenly, you’re hearing Sirius’s worried voice come from the other side of the room. You crane your head around James' broad shoulders to see him, haloed by the light coming through the front door.
“Why is he here?” you mumble, feeling worse by the second. It comes out worse than it sounded in your head.
Apparently, he hears you. “He is here because James had to call him.” He hugs you almost immediately. Big, warm hands come around to cage you in against his chest. You hide the good side of your face into his neck and huff. “Do you not want me here?”
You pull back quickly and really regret it. Blinking back the hot, pinching pain in your face. “What? No, I’m just…ugh.”
Sirius pouts, then hums a sympathetic noise from the back of his throat. He keeps his hands on your shoulders. “It’s okay, honey. Don’t worry about it, yeah?”
You close your eyes and incline your head to lean it down on his ringed-up hand. Your cheek all smooshed up against him.
“Is she okay?” You hear him ask James. He hums a yes. “She’s not concussed?”
“She doesn’t think so,” he says.
“She is right here,” you mumble. You pull back from his chest and swing your legs over the chair.
"I'm sorry, lovely." He looks like he wants to hug you again. "You're okay? Had some water?"
You nod. "Just really wanna go home."
"All right, let's go, yeah?" James takes your elbow to help you off the stool, and Sirius steadies you by the shoulder. It's kind of adorable how gentle they're being with you. Soft hands and pinched brows. They both make a funny sound when you wobble a little.
James grabs your bag and throws it over his shoulder and you all leave.
"I'm sorry, Sirius," you say before you get to the door. "Were you at work? You won't get in trouble for leaving, will you?"
"No, it's okay. Don't worry about that." He smiles.
You will. You'll no doubt feel bad for the rest of the week.
You bump into Remus on your way out. He holds the door open for you. He looks like he's run up the block. "Rem, baby, they didn't call you too?" You're not sure why you hadn't expected it. If he wasn't here, he'd definitely feel horrible.
"Dove, you're okay?" he pants. He holds your face in his hands and you try not to cry. You're not sure if having them all here makes you feel better or worse. "God, I was so worried."
The first tear leaves a hot track down your cheek. You push yourself into Remus's chest instead of answering and wrap your hands around his waist. He crosses his arms over your back.
He moves you out of the way of the entrance and you scuffle along with him. Your tears are slow, dampening his shirt, catching the brunt of your upset. You don't make any horrible sounds, just quiet, sticky tears.
He encourages your face back with a firm, pinching hand. You blink back the end of your cries. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare everyone."
"Don't worry," he says, corners of his mouth trembling into a sad smile. "It's all good. As long as you're okay."
"I just," you take a stuttering breath, "just got really tired. I probably shouldn't have worked today."
Sirius kisses the end of your eyebrow, right across your temple. "You've been working a bit too much, I think."
"I didn't ruin anyone's day?" You sniffle way too sadly for anyone's opinion. Remus squeezes you closer with almost bruising fingertips.
"No, lovely," James says, sticky smile gracing his lips. "Don't worry about it, okay? We just wanted to be here for you. That's our job."
"Right," you say, voice catching at the end.
Sirius shucks your jacket on for you as the wind outside picks up. "Speaking of being here for you," he says. "Is James your emergency contact?"
"No, you all are," you tell him, a hint of laughter in your words.
"Right."
Then, you start actually laughing. "Was he the only one to pick up?"
"I think so," he joins in.
"What if it was serious?" Suddenly, you're teasing.
"It was serious!" Remus balks.
"You didn't answer the phone!"
Everyone goes quiet. You burst out into the biggest fit of giggles, smiling so widely it hurts. "I'm kidding!" you say, struggling to speak. "God, stop. Look at your faces! Stop - stop it, my head hurts."
James cages you in against his chest, stealing you from Remus. "My poor baby," he coos. "Oh, they're awful, awful boyfriends."
"Fuck off," Sirius grumbles. "Just cause you're always on your phone."
"Don't listen to them, honey." He's awful. "You comin' in my car?"
"If you stop being mean, then yeah."
"Yeah, you fuckin' tell him, Y/N." Comes Remus's grumpy voice.
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luveline · 1 year
Note
would you ever consider writing poly!marauders? or even more of the luna reader with platonic (or romantic) marauders?
if u have more poly!m requests please send them (to clarify this is romantic) fem!reader tw cut
"You should be more careful," Remus says, "really, dove." 
You lean back against the kitchen counter and try not to wince as he finishes with the dressing on your arm. 
"I am careful," you say. 
He laughs softly. It's a rare sound, kind that has you smiling immediately. You wrap your arms around his neck, careful not to press down on your injury, and kiss his neck quickly. 
"Thanks for fixing me, handsome," you say. 
Remus pats your back. "That's never something you have to thank me for… You might like me less when the boys come home." 
You pull away. "You texted them?" you ask, already resigned to your fate. 
He looks gorgeous even when you're mad at him, pale skinned but dark in his way, dark eyes and dark brows and his amazingly handsome nose that makes you wanna lean over and kiss him. 
"Afraid so." Remus squeezes a path up your arm to your shoulder. "You know the lashing they'd give me if I didn't." 
"Well," you murmur, "I suppose you did patch me up." 
He kissed your forehead as the sound of the front door opening echoes down the hall. "That's the spirit." 
"Angel?" 
You relax. It's James, which means you aren't in for a loving telling off, just a loving. You stay by Remus' side until James is in view, a shock of green rugby uniform stark against brown skin. He sheds his bag and you practically throw yourself into his open arms, 'cause usually that's exactly what he wants. 
"Wait wait wait!" he says, holding out his hand, his wrist brace scratchy against your arm. "Don't hurt yourself worse! What happened?" 
You fight him, trying to hug him and laughing when he holds you back like you're nothing. He's strong. "James, come on. I cut it on the garden fence." 
He makes a sound like he feels super sorry for you and finally lets you hug him, your face in his solid chest, your hands at the small of his back. You settle in for as long as you want, James and you both suckers for a good hug, and sigh as his cheek kisses the top of your head. 
"You okay, Moons? You look tired." James voice rumbles through your hear, low and warm. 
"Fine. She just shocked me, running in the house with blood dripping down to her elbow." 
"Give us a hug." 
"I'll make tea." 
James turns his lips to your forehead, "How come he'll hug me when we're alone, and he'll hug you all day long when you're together, but he's totally allergic to affection when we're together?" 
"He's shy," you mumble, "ask him again in an hour and he'll say yes." 
The door opens a second time and you'd hide your face pretty much in James' armpit, laughing through the horror. "Hide me." 
"No, I don't think so." 
James works your face away from his chest, hands held over the soft slopes of your shoulders. He looks you in the eye, all melty brown and sweetness. "Sure you're okay?" he asks. 
You hum. He kisses your cheek. 
"Okay, I'm gonna go harass Remus for a hug then, before he boils the kettle and threatens me with a scalding. Love you." 
"I don't love you, you're leaving me for the wolves." 
"I'm hardly a wolf," comes Sirius' amused drawl. 
James raises his eyebrows at you in a silent gesture for Good luck, angel, and disappears around the corner to the kitchen. 
You sigh and spin on your heel, finding your arch nemesis (concerned boyfriend) propped against the wall. He's in casual work attire, which for Sirius is a smart pair of trousers and a dark button down with the sleeves rolled up. His tan seems to have waned in the winter, leaving him pale. Though he often claims in a joking manner that it's a consequence of loving you, he's always so worried it steals the colour from his skin. 
I like to worry, he'd assured you once. 
"You might not believe me, but you look very handsome today," you say. 
He raises a dark brow. "You say that every day." 
"Emphasis on 'very,'" you say. 
He pulls his weight off of the wall and holds out his hand as he approaches. You let him take your arm, let him assess the small dressing bandage Remus has applied over your cut. 
"It was deep," you admit, "but not very long." 
"Mm, Remus said," Sirius says, near murmuring as his thumb works into your wrist. He rubs over unbroken skin gently. "Does it hurt?" 
You shake your head vehemently. 
"Swear?" 
"Why would I lie?" you ask. You smile at him. "You really do look handsome. And you didn't need to come home from work." 
"It's my lunch break." 
"Oh, good! Let me make you something, while everybody's home." 
"Or I can make you something," he suggests. 
You enter into a stare off. He faces you with little expression, a blank slate. A pretty blank slate. His lashes don't so much as flicker, while you struggle to keep a straight face under so much seriousness. Your lips twitch with a laugh and something about it must break him, because he takes your face into his two hands and presses your noses together. 
"You make it very hard to be sensible about things," he says, and gives you a chaste kiss. 
His lips are a warmth you savour, and he steals them back much too swiftly for your liking. 
"Remus is the sensible one," you deny. "You're the overprotective one. And James is… James." You sigh, lovelorn. "And I'm the stupid one who cuts herself on chicken wire. You really didn't have to come home." 
"I wanted to." 
He leads you by the hand into the kitchen, where James and Remus stand in front of an unboiled kettle, Remus face smushed into James broad shoulder, a muscled arm locking him into place. He looks quite happy. 
"Sorry, I'm still making tea," he says into James' sleeve.
"No, I'm gonna make dinner," you say, yanking Sirius to the lovefest. 
You worm under James' other arm and Sirius strokes at the hair curling over Remus' forehead, mumbling, "Oh, god, she's killed you." 
"Worse ways to go," Remus says. 
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bluecollarmcandtf · 10 days
Text
Typical Day For a Bouncer
I'm Joey, a security guard at a night club down the street. I got the job because I'm a big ex-rugby player, but I've kept it for so long because I'm good at handling people. I can't tell you how many underage idiots try to sneak in here. It takes patience, grit, and a keen eye to keep the troublemakers out!
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Like any other Friday night, the club is packed tight and a line of impatient patrons stretches down the street. I've gotten good at telling people "no," in a way that makes them listen, so they have no choice but to calmly wait until I feel like checking their ID and letting them in.
Every now and again, I'll have some fools try to sweet talk their way in. Girls try to flirt, guys try to bribe, but the biggest assholes make a scene. It's nothing I can't handle.
Just last week, I had this entitled brat come up to me and demand I let him in. The boy couldn't have thought I'd believe he was twenty-one. He wasn't even in line! I don't remember what I did to get him to shut up, but he kept hammering on and on about his skills with hypnosis. I remember listening to that kid ramble about the voodoo of the mind for what felt like forever.
I don't remember kicking him to the curb, though. He probably got tired and went home.
"Hey, buddy!" a familiar voice squeaks over the music. I roll my eyes, preparing myself to say no yet again.
"Oh, it's you," my deep voice catches in my throat. The kid from last week is standing in front of me once more, ignoring the line of adults to his left. In his ratty sweatshirt and baseball cap, he doesn't look any older than eighteen. Still, the sight of him unlocks a memory I somehow had forgotten. "Hello, sir!" I call back, remembering him as my closest and most respected friend. How could I've forgotten that this boy was my best friend I call sir?
"You gonna let me in, big guy?" A devious grin spreads across his boyish face.
"Of course, sir."
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There are a few angry comments from the people waiting in line. I can't imagine they're happy to see this guy ushered into the club before them. Normally, I have a strict policy against VIP treatment. I think everyone should have to wait in line like equals, but sir is great. He can come and go whenever he wants!
"Hey, why don't you take a break from the front and buy me some beers," the boy yells over the roar of the music.
I leave the entrance and start pushing my way through the crowd in the direction of the bar. I probably should've warned the other bouncer that I was taking a break, but my feet were carrying me away before I knew what was happening. The other guard knows what he's doing, but he's still pretty new here. I'm sure he'll be fine.
The bartender gives me a can of light beer, and I hustle it back to the boy on the dance floor. People tend to get out of the way when they see a giant security guard coming through, but the place is so jammed packed that I have to press against several sweaty partiers on the way over.
"Your beer, sir," I say, flinching at the meekness in my voice.
"What the hell is this?" he whines when he sees the drink, "This is crap. Get me the good stuff, and buy a lot of it!" The kid tossed the open can at my broad chest, and the cheap beer splashes across my uniform.
"Yes, sir."
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I march back to the bar with a clenched fist, and grab a tray, ordering the barback to fill it up with the more expensive bottles of beer. He glances at my soaked shirt and pants, but averts his eyes the second he sees my less-than-friendly face.
That boy is my best friend. I respect him greatly, but goddamn is he infuriating. How did I even become close to someone so immature? I pacify myself, and carry the tray back over to the kid.
"That's better," he snorts and takes a sip of the premium drink while I stand there to make sure he likes it this time.
"Alright, sir," I begin, thinking about the twenty minute break I've been taking, "I need to get back to work."
"No you don't!" the boy interjects.
"I..." the words fumble in my mouth, "...well, I don't need to, but I should, sir."
"Tell your boss you're done for the night. Then go wait by my car. You can guard it!"
"Yes, sir," the words come out before I even know what I've agreed to.
Before I know it, I'm marching into the back office and calmly telling the club owner that I'm taking the night off. He's pissed, but I'm his most reliable employee, so he doesn't fire me. I can tell he's not happy, though. He looks like he'd take a swing at me if I weren't two feet taller than him and a hundred pounds heavier.
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"You make a great watchdog!" the teenager laughs as he comes stumbling out of the club.
Something about him brings a scowl to my face. It might be the way he referred to me as an animal, or it might be the way he's staring at me like I am an animal. Maybe I'm just irritated from standing by this parked car in the cold for the last two hours, but this boy is getting on my nerves.
"No one has bothered your car, sir," I report.
"Good, boy," he slurs and then reaches a gangly arm to pat the top of my head. I can smell the distinct earthiness of the beer I'd bought wafting out with his breath.
Every muscle in my body tenses up, as I try my best to restrain myself. Sir is my best friend. I respect him. I do what he says. I shouldn't get this worked up by him making a little joke at my expense. It's perfectly fine for him to tease me a little since I trust him completely. I know all this.
"Still think hypnosis is fake?" he asks, bringing his wet lips uncomfortably close to my own.
"Sir?" my brow furrows, unsure why he's bringing up that crap again.
"Well, it's real, and you're hypnotized."
I stifle a groan, "Sir, you've had a lot to drink..."
"The only thing I'm drunk on is power!" he yells, smashing a bottle on the sidewalk for effect, "I've got you like a trained dog; that's how good of a hypnotist I am! Let me prove it."
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I was pissed. I was livid. Sir had mocked and insulted me repeatedly. It was a bad idea for anyone to pick on me, especially someone a third of my size! Nevertheless, the boy has all my faith, so I kept my mouth clamped shut.
He told me to kneel, and I grunted, "Yes, sir." I already had beer all over my clothes, so what's a little mud on the knees of my pants? It was better to just keep him happy, but that didn't mean he had hypnotized me.
"Keep your arms raised, like you're worshipping me," he went on.
"Yes, sir."
My arms went up. I'll admit this was a bit more strange, but I still trust and respect the teenager enough to comply. That doesn't say anything about my state of mind.
"Alright, now stay like that until I come back," he laughs, "I'm going to get a snack, but if anyone walks by, I want you to bark at them like the hypnotized guard dog you are!"
"Yes, sir," I answer, hearing the hoarseness in my voice.
As the boy stumbles away, I find myself stuck in the position he'd left me in: on my knees, in the cold, with my arms raised in compliance. I'm doing this willingly, right?
Time creeps by uncomfortably slow as I silently wait next to his car. Suddenly, I hear footsteps nearby. A wave of barks burst out of my throat, and I find myself growling like a territorial mutt in the direction of the pedestrians.
Now I'm acting like a dog!
Sir doesn't come back for another hour, which leaves me to viciously snap at numerous other passerby. They seem terrified, which makes sense. They probably think I'm insane! I'm beginning to wonder if I'm insane too.
I respect that boy more than anyone even if I only met him once, a week ago. I really would do anything he told me too. Is that strange? It's not like me to be so...obedient. I'm the kind of guy that normally tells people what to do, so why am I doing this?
There's no way...it's not possible...I can't actually be hypnotized, right?
"Good, boy," he pulls off my cap and ruffles my hair, "Now, be a good dog and drive me to your house. I might fall asleep on the way there, so you'll have to carry me inside to your bed. If you do good, I'll give you a special treat." He licks his lips and reaches a scrawny hand out to squeeze my tired pec.
"Yes, sir," I answer, jumping up to do his bidding, but I can feel that the words aren't really mine.
Shit. I think he's right. I think I am hypnotized.
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sparkling-ariaria · 3 months
Text
Marauders Era fics I read and want to keep...no°3
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*Complete fem or non-specific reader insert fics*Updated: 14.04.2024
Falling for you by milunalupin - Peter x Reader A drabble about having a crush on Peter Pettigrew with Valentine's day coming up.
Dating Peter Pettigrew headcanon by maraudersmylove
Pickup lines by milunalupin - James x Reader With Valentine's Day coming up, James knew that this was the time to shoot his shot with you...
Lovesick Sirius drabble by theemporium - Sirius x gf!Reader Him pining over and loving cottage core you.
First introduction drabble by luveline - Remus x shy!Reader
Lovesick Sirius drabble by theemporium - Sirius x gf!Reader Him just pining hopelessly after you.
My girl by alwaysmoncheri - James x gf!Reader No one makes James Potter feel the way that his girlfriend does and he definitely knows it.
You two being in your own bubble drabble by luveline - Remus x shy!Reader
Sirius always needs your attention by ddejavvu
Clingy drunk drabble by inkdrinkerworld - modern!James x gf!Reader James who gets a little too drunk at a party and starts showing everyone photos of you because he just misses you.
Takin' a breath by familyvideostevie - modern!Sirius x gf!Reader Simply put, you love being in love with Sirius. You just never realized other people noticed all that much.
Lovesick James headcanon by volturissideslut
Lovesick Remus headcanon by volturissideslut
Lovesick Sirius headcanon by volturissideslut
Matching nail colours blurb by moonstruckme - Sirius x gf!Reader
Endless empathy by dwindlinghaze - Remus x gf!Reader Post full moon Remus who just wants to be with you.
Flirtation by moonstruckme - Sirius x shy!gf!Reader When Sirius won't stop tormenting you with pet names, you think to take revenge, but he doesn't react as you expected.
Prettiest girl at Hogwarts by kitkathockey - Remus x gf!Reader Remus is answering some of the first years questions and one of them asks who is the prettiest girl at Hogwarts.
Sirius helping you discover your right hair routine by moonstruckme - Sirius x gf!Reader
Home in each other's arms by ell0ra-br3kk3r-writes - Sirius x gf!Reader
Sirius drabble by moonstruckme - Sirius x gf!Reader Sirius speaking to you in french.
Borrowing his jumper for the first time by ohwowimlonley - Remus x gf!Reader
Remus drabble by lizard-on-a-window-pane - Remus x gf!Reader Remus is irritable before the full moon, his senses heightened and his temper short… but one person soothes him even when the rest of the world is anything but soothing.
Sirius drabble by luveline - Sirius x gf!Reader Shy!Reader being surprisingly cuddly when tired.
Sirius with a cold drabble by ddejavvu - Sirius x gf!Reader
James falls in love at first sight drabble by luveline - rugby player!James x cake decorator!Reader
Bumps by writtenbymoonflower - Sirius x gf!Reader You bruise easy and Sirius likes to be dramatic.
Lavender Haze by whorediaries-09 - Sirius x soft!Reader Sirius with a soft reader who's doing lovey-dovey little things for him.
He loves you no matter how shy by luveline - James x shy!gf!Reader
Puppy by messers-moony - Remus x gf!Reader Remus has a long day at Charms. (Prompt: Listening to them while they vent.)
Pretty Boy by alwaysmoncheri - James x Reader You think James is really pretty—unfortunately for you, Sirius notices and decides to take matters into his own hands
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azsazz · 5 months
Text
Change Your Ticket (Part 6)
Rugby Star!Cassian x Reader (A Modern AU)
Summary: Dating famous rugby star Cassian Bailey is a dream. What's not one is keeping your secret relationship under wraps. Will you and Cassian be able to keep from the limelight or will your relationship crumble because of it?
Warnings: None
Word Count: 3,300
[Part 1] [Part 2] [Part 3] [Part 4] [Part 5]
Notes: I rlly need to stop overthinking this...so I'm just going to post it.
_________________________________________
Cassian don’t know why he’s running myself into the ground. It’s been a great morning, and although you’d had to leave for work, he’d enjoyed getting the little time seeing those pretty eyes, how your cheeks had pinkened with his taunts.
He almost had you climbing right back into bed with him.
He had loved the way you moaned and groaned about work, how you tried to hide away from him by running into the bathroom. How you tried to block him out by starting the shower, trying to mask how wet you were for him by drenching yourself under the hot spray.
Cassian bets it didn’t work.
His cock stirs at the thought of finishing he’d started, lingering in the space between the both of you like a thread winding tighter and tighter. And he thought it might snap when you’d come out all ready for work, eyes a little bit dazed as they avoided his lounging body on your bed. Cassian had all of the time in the world to tease you.
It was something after your sheepish goodbye, still reveling in the fact that he’d been so close to breaking through your routine. And if your boss dared fire you for spending a little time with him, well, Cassian isn’t too sure he’d be all that mad.
He wouldn’t mind taking care of you. In fact, it’s what he desires. And it’s not some manly expectation for you not to work, if that’s what you truly want, then so be it, he will be your best cheerleader. But he always aches when he’s away from you. He wants you by his side because he’s never had that, never had the rush that someone who actually cares for his wellbeing watches him play the game he loves, will caress him and speak encouragement, no matter if he wins or loses.
He doesn’t have a mother to call when things go sour, a father to seek advice from, nor siblings to playfully banter with. Sure, he’s had the children who’d he seen grow in the system with him, but oftentimes he’d be separated by a foster home that would only last a handful of months before they sent him away again, no matter how much he tried to stay. He’d help in the kitchen, with chores, jumping at the chance without even being asked because if someone were cleaning or cooking, maybe they’d keep him around a little bit longer.
His attempts were futile, at best.
“Bring it in, gents,” Coach calls and Cassian jogs over with the rest of his team. He snags a water bottle with thanks from the young boy handing them out, spraying a large gulp into his parched mouth before tilting the bottle back and wetting his already damp hair.
“Thanks, kid,” he grins, and the little boys’ cheeks turn red.
Cassian joins the rest of the team, forming a semi-circle around the coach. He finds his place between Azriel and Rhysand, the captain of the team. They are his best mates, brothers in every sense of the word, except literally. They’ve all played for the Velaris Stars for two seasons now, and are almost inseparable, both on and off the field.
“Great practice, eh?” he asks, getting down on one knee like the rest of the players as they await Coach Devlin’s words of wisdom. Something the coach has been trying to instill in his team for a while now, according to Azriel, who’s been with the Stars the longest. There isn’t a practice nor game that goes by without a morale boosting chat from Coach.
Azriel cuts him a glare from the side of his eye, and Cassian winces. His teammate hadn’t gotten to practice with them, ankle still not quite healed after the last match. That was poor wording on Cassian’s part.
Rhys brushes his damp hair from his eyes, toweling the sweat from his face as he responds. “Eh, still could work on some more scrums, but we’re in pretty good shape for Saturday’s game.”
“Oi, Third Degree,” Devlin’s snaps, startling the three of them. Cassian, Azriel, and Rhys have become known to the team and the fans as Third Degree because the group of them dominate on the field. It had a nice ring to it, if he does say so himself. Devlin stands with hands on his hips, lips curled around his whistle as if he was about to blow it to gain their attention. “We interrupting your little chit-chat?”
“No, sir,” the three answer in unison, and Cassian notes the difficulty his coach has to not roll his eyes. He bites back a smirk, giving him his attention.
“As I was saying,” Devlin continues with a pointed look in their direction. It slides off Azriel’s shoulders but Rhysand has the gall to look innocently at their coach, as if he’s nothing but the angel captain Devlin thought he was when he’d been chosen for such a position. Cassian snickers and Rhys elbows him. “We’re playing the Autumn Rangers this weekend. Now, since it’s a home game, I expect all of you on your best behavior. You will welcome them to Velaris with sportsmanlike conduct and will not be brawling outside of this stadium,” he says, eyeing Azriel, who had gotten into a fistfight with Lucien Vanserra in the hotel lobby last season.
Cassian never did hear about what had happened, though he did wonder if it had anything to do with Lucein’s older brother, Eris, who is the Stars’ athletic trainer. The younger Vanserra was estranged from his large family, all connected to the sport in some way, shape, or form. Something about a distasteful relationship in the public eye his family was not proud of. In the end, Lucien had lost her heart anyway. Cassian feels a twinge of pity for the youngster, only in his second year in the sport. He has no one, either.
“He better not let me catch him off of this grass, then,” Azriel mutters, arms crossed over his chest. He won’t be playing in the game this weekend because of his ankle, and Cassian knows how hard he’s taking the news. While they were practicing, he’d been on the sidelines with Eris, working on stretching and testing the muscles of his rolled ankle. The red-headed trainer told Devlin he was going to have to sit out for another game, much to Azriel’s utter annoyance.
“He’d probably go straight for that fragile ankle of yours,” Rhys answers quietly, violet gaze still on their coach.
Azriel kicks him with his good foot and Rhys winces, biting back a grin.
Coach Devlin’s speech wraps up with some words of wisdom. The same one’s Cassian hears after every practice, before every game, and even in his nightmares. “Stars help the moon light up the universe. That’s the power of teamwork. Now get off my field and get into the showers, you all stink.”
“To this day, I don’t understand what that’s supposed to mean,” Cassian mutters to his friends, nodding at Balthazar as they make their way towards the locker rooms. He catches Eris eyeing Azriel, a pair of crutches in his hands, but the latter doesn’t seem to notice, or is avoiding eye contact with the trainer as he limps from the field. “You good, man?”
“Peachy,” Azriel grunts, the fringe of his hair falling into his eyes. He’s trying his best not to limp, but there’s a twist of pain in his ankle and he hisses uncomfortably. He’d rather it gives out than use those fucking crutches Eris is lugging around for him. He can fuck right off with those. “It’s just another bullshit waying of saying ‘team work makes the dream work,’ Cass.”
Cassian considers his coaches words. He thought they’d played as an impeccable team during the last match that they had, but they’d still lost anyway. He’s not going to think it’s because his own shooting star wasn’t there in the city, watching him play.
“Maybe he needs to work on it a little,” Cass answers, “Shit’s confusing.”
“More confusing than the Rangers chant? ‘Allez les rouges?’ What does that even mean?”
“It means ‘Go Reds,’” Azriel answers, and Cassian didn’t know he knew French. Maybe he should pester him until he can teach him something worth saying to you to make you swoon. Then, he thinks that Azriel would teach him to say something naughty instead, and Cassian changes his mind.
He tugs the hemline of his shirt up and it sticks to his skin. It’s tight so that other players can’t easily grab it, but it often gets stuck over his broad shoulders. With a breath of frustration, the constricting fabric finally gives way, and Cassian rolls his shoulders, tossing it onto the bench in front of his locker before he digs around for his phone.
He can hear it buzzing against the wood and his brows furrow. Most of the people he knows are from the team, you, and a few others in the league. There’s his media manager, who he has weekly meetings with, and very sparse social media notifications on.
There’s a giddy stir in his stomach, hoping it might be you. He needs to shower, set up a grocery delivery, and head to his house to begin preparations for the extravagant dinner he’s planning on making you.
Cassian’s smile morphs into a frown upon seeing his lock screen. It’s not a call from you, but notifications cover his screen, from his manager, telling him to call him immediately, to a few friends he has outside of his team, texting him about something that’s happening on Twitter.
He unlocks the phone, heart kicking up in speed. If he’s being mentioned and called out for something in the media, it’s usually not a good thing. He wracks his brain as his fingers move on their own accord, motions robotic as they click the blue icon.
The first thing he sees when the screen refreshes is a photo of you, and his world stills.
The noise in the locker room turns to static in his ears. His heart is pounding so hard in his chest, adrenaline rushing through his veins, that he thinks he may drop the phone to the ground. His vision tunnels in on the photo of you from this morning, wearing his black t-shirt stuffed into your trousers. You’re pulling your hair into a clip, your work bag slung over your shoulder. You look good, of course you do, it’s exactly how he remembered you when you’d left him this morning. But what is going on?
The caption above the photo reads:
            Cassian Bailey’s Love Try: Secret Girlfriend Revealed!
Fuck. Oh, fuck.
Cassian’s hands shake as he scrolls. Post upon post of you headed to work fill his screen like a tidal wave of coverage. Most are the same photo, and he doesn’t dare look at any of the comments or reposts. There’s a grainy one of you at what must be your work, eyes round and tinged with fear as you stand in the lobby of the building.
He exits the app, pulling up your number instead. He shoves his phone between his shoulder and ear, digging around frantically for his clothes, wallet, and keys. He needs to get out of here, needs to find you, because your phone is going straight to voicemail no matter how many times he calls.
“Fuck,” he mutters, swinging around only to run face-to-face with Azriel and Rhysand.
“Cass?” Rhys asks, reaching his hands out as if not to scare him away. He can barely even focus on them right now, mind reeling with thoughts of if you’re safe, how you’re taking all of this, if you’re over. “You alright?”
“Is it true?” Azriel adds, hazel eyes a touch softer now.
He looks frantically between his friends. His mouth can no longer form words but all he knows is that he needs to get out of here right the fuck now.
Cassian can only nod. It’s more of a jerk of his head, and then he’s shoving his way between them and beelining for the door. It’s all he can do to pray that there isn’t media waiting to follow him, because he’s going straight to your home.
⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•
“(Y/N), it’s definitely not the paparazzi.”
You place your freshly refilled glass on the table and shove to your feet. The blanket falls from your lap onto a heap on the floor, but you couldn’t care less as you make your way to the front door, Mor on your heels.
You freeze when you round the corner, meeting a worried hazel gaze that makes your aching heart crack. His eyes are red-rimmed, brows pulled tight with worry. Cassina’s hair is a mess, from both practice and running his fingers through where it was pulled back in a sloppy bun for practice.
He pushes gently past Feyre, but he’s still a wall of a man and she jumps out of his way.
It seems like time slows when he reaches you. Your vision vignettes so it’s only Cassian, standing before you like a child scared of the monster under their bed. He reaches out but thinks better of it, worried you don’t want him to touch you at all.
Your name is a whisper across his lips, and it makes you break, falling into his strong arms.
“I can fix this, I swear.” His voice is raw, cracking with his words. You hug him closer. His heart is running rampant in his chest, so you stroke soothing but shaky circles into his back. A touch of relief floods you, knowing that Cassian is as worried about all of this as you are. People know your name, your face, and they’ll be digging into your past, predicting your future, forever, now.
“Cass,” you offer gently, pulling away slightly to look up at him. He doesn’t want to give an inch, hands clamped like iron around your waist. “I don’t want to break up.”
“You don’t?” he asks, like he can’t quite believe it. His frantic gaze searches yours, and you let him see the truth in yours. His shoulders relax only slightly after he finds your words sincere, moving one large hand to your cheek to caress your face.
“No.”
You watch him swallow and force out the question he doesn’t want to ask. “Not even now that everyone knows you’re mine?”
No, you don’t want to be in the media, don’t want anyone to know who you are or try to get close to you only because of Cassian. The thought of people with ill intentions coming after you makes you sick, but you don’t want to stop this relationship with Cassian.
“I have no idea how I’m going to come back from this one, but no, I don’t want to leave you.”
Cassian releases a shaky exhale and because he can’t help himself, he dips down and kisses the hell out of you. You breathe him in, salty with sweat and part your lips, allowing his tongue to dip into your mouth, brushing softly against your own. It feels like an apology but he doesn’t need to give you one, it isn’t his fault you left the house this morning in a t-shirt you’d assumed no one would connect to the rugby player.
“I love you, sweetheart,” he breathes, lips brushing your own. He’s still holding you close, and the cocoon of his arms keeps you steady. None of the outside world matters right now, not when he’s holding you like this. “I’ll do whatever I can to fix this. I promise.”
You nod, an unsure feeling stirring your gut. You don’t know how he might begin to even attempt fixing something like this, but you trust Cassian, and there will be time to talk privately when your friends aren’t staring at you while your boyfriend kisses the daylights out of you.
Speaking of, Mor has the biggest grin on her face and Feyre’s eyes are wide, glass of wine halted halfway to her lips. At least she’s shut the door.
“Hey, Mor,” Cassian nods, and you stare up at him incredulously.
“Hey, Cass.”
Wait a minute.
“You two know each other?” you ask, just as shocked as Feyre, who’s jaw hangs low.
“My uncle owns the team,” Mor shrugs, and now your jaw is touching the ground. “I know all of the players.”
“Why didn’t you tell us?” Feyre exclaims, elbowing Mor in the side. She groans dramatically, rolling her eyes as she snatches her friend’s glass from her hand to take a sip.
This is certainly news to you. You can’t believe all this time Mor and Cassian have known each other. When you were in the bar last week for the game and your friends had attended, Mor didn’t act like she even knew what rugby was.
“Because I didn’t think you were that into rugby,” she tuts, saying exactly what you’re thinking. She sends a pointed look your way, “And I didn’t know you were dating Cassian Bailey!”
Heat rushes to your cheeks. You do feel bad for not telling your best friends, but you haven’t told anyone, not even your family.
Oh no, your family. Have they seen the social media storm that you’re now in the eye of? Have they been trying to contact you to ask their own questions or see if you’re okay?
You try to dislodge yourself from Cassian but he refuses to let you go, turning to you with a frown.
“Why are you wearing a Sealion’s hat?” His question serious, and there’s a slight scrunch to his nose, letting you in on his distaste. Fuck, you forgot about the hat.
You laugh, but it comes out thickly. “It’s Tarquin’s. He let me borrow it after the paps showed up to my work.”
“Should I be worried about this Tarquin?” Cassian asks, genuine concern on his face. So much so that your wet chuckle turns a touch more real.
“He’s more into you than me, so I’m wondering if I’m the one who should actually be worried,” you tease, hugging him tighter before pulling away. Cassian pouts, but you pat him on his chest. “You stink.”
“I thought you liked when I’m all musky and sweaty,” Cassian responds with a touch of suggestiveness. So much for figuring out what to do about your face in the public tonight.
And it’s fine, for now. You’d much rather spend your evening allowing Cassian to comfort you, and you him. You can still see the weariness in his gaze, how he may not want to talk about this in front of an audience. He cares for your opinion and your opinion only.
“Okay, ew,” Feyre says, sliding from her spot at the counter and reaching for her shoes. “I’m Feyre, by the way, and we’re totally leaving, right Mor?” she asks over her shoulder to a smirking Mor.
“No, wait, you guys don’t have to—”
“Yes, we do. We do not want to be around while the two of you make-up,” Mor agrees with Feyre, slipping into her own shoes. Expensive trainers that she must’ve slipped into quickly when she’d found out the news. She snatches her purse off of the counter, key ring jingling with keychains and keys. “Call us when your phone stops blowing up. See you later, Cass.”
“I think your captain is really hot by the way,” Feyre yells as Mor shoves her through the door with a laugh.
You sigh, turning back to your boyfriend who’s grinning down at you like a creep.
“What?”
“I like your friends,” he says earnestly, pulling you back into his body by your hips. “Now, how about some dinner?”
⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•
Change Your Ticket Taglist: @justasillylittlegoofyguy @starsinyourseyes @jdeclerc @indiedash @kennedy-brooke @tothestarsandwhateverend @azsteris @obsessivereaderchick @aalxrose @acourtofbatboydreams @azrielover @bookishbroadwaybish @itsinherited @i-am-a-lost-girl16 @vellichor01 @mischiefmanagers @queerqueenlynn @justdreamstars @mayemperess @wallacewillow0773638 @microwaveallthedemons
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shotmrmiller · 3 months
Note
cbf!Price?!?!
You mean your older brother's even older friend?
You'd been born in the US to an American mom and a British dad; but his job moved you all back across the pond. New country, new school, new people--it had been hell for you and your brother. But the family next door were so welcoming, especially their only kid, John.
Who always called you 'sunshine', gave you piggyback rides at rugby matches so you didn't get lost in the crowd, and never said "Hello" but, "There's my favorite girl".
The same cbf!Price who was your scary dog privilege when you fell in love with the underground punk scene and wanted to go to the sketchiest concerts.
When he'd enlisted, you'd cried for days, but couldn't bring yourself to tell him why you were so heartbroken, no matter how many times he asked, brows furrowed with concern. "Its only a couple months, luv, then I'll be on post just down the road. We'll still have our weekends."
And he kept that promise, as much as he could, even after you moved out of your parent's home to attend university.
It was forever on the tip of your tongue; the words you so desperately wanted to say, had to bite back, otherwise they'd destroy that precious friendship....
.... I can only imagine the myriad of unfortunate ways he might accidentally hear you whispering his name and those words....
with my brash personality, im fucking him the day he's to leave for basic. js.
no regrets around here.
--
ohmygod! imagine him being captain now, and he brings you to meet the boys.
Johnny whistles low the moment he lays eyes on you. "Steamin' Jesus, Captain. Tha' yer friend? She single?"
John does not answer him.
Kyle is kind, sweet, and courteous. Suspiciously so. It gives John flashbacks of how he acts towards women he wants to bed.
Right.
Simon's just his big, quiet self. He's intimidating, but you're not afraid—after all, you grew up with your bully older brother and John.
John notices his eyes gleam when you talk at him, yes, at, because Simon doesn't respond. But he listens. And he's been listening a little too intently, staring at your dainty hands gesture animatedly.
That's enough, he thinks.
"Time t'go home, love." You pout but wave goodbye at the boys and head towards his vehicle.
Johnny opens his mouth to speak but John quickly intervenes, that unless he wants to start fucking pushing, keep his thoughts to himself.
"I'll see you all at base tomorrow."
On the ride home, you tell him that they were all very nice. John's grip on the steering wheel tightens and says that as nice as they are, they go through women more than they do magazines.
"Oh." Did he imagine the disappointment laced in your voice?
"Do you?" What?
"I don't do it often."
"Oh." He turns his head to look at you, but you're staring out the window.
His heart races and elation thrums through his veins. You definitely sounded upset. John looks straight ahead and speeds up to take you home.
His home.
There's only you for him, and if you won't take the first step, then he will.
--
side note: what if he didn't return those feelings? christ id eat my fucking phone. im running away!!! no one look at me how embarrassing!!! his eyes soften, and he's like, "Oh. I'm so sorry, love. You and I practically grew up together."
That really stings. And then he brings his little girlfriend over to meet you and your brother, and you stiffly shake her hand and go to your room to cry.
Someone softly knocks on your door, and you don't move to open it, just yell at whoever is at the door to fuck off in a warbly voice. John's muffled I'm sorry deepens the crack in your heart.
"'S'alright, John. I'll be okay."
You did this to yourself, anyway.
The marriage invitation comes in the mail and you tear it to pieces.
Since you were young, you dreamt of being Mrs. Price, but now, that's all it'll ever be.
A childish dream.
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hookedonhuge · 10 months
Text
Lucky Shorts
This is a story about the luckiest day of your life.
It all started when you went to a rugby match which wasn’t your usual style as you had no interest in the sport. The people playing the sport on the other hand, well let’s just say they had bodies built to be watched by people like you.
If eyeing off the large men wrestling with each other wasn’t enough for you, then seeing one of the star players peel off their tight, sweaty shorts from their giant, bubble butt and huge, athletic legs and toss it into the crowd after the match certainly was. The icing on the cake was that those very same shorts landed in your hands. It was as if he knew just how desperately you wanted them.
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As soon as you got home you went into your room and pressed those sweaty shorts into your face. You were in total bliss as you breathed in the intoxicating, ripe odours of the shorts, imagining that big, sweaty stud being in the room with you. You revelled in the fantasy of him smothering his stinky shorts into your nose, his face painted with a mix of pride and disgust as you got off on inhaling his potent musk.
“How pathetic,” you imagined him saying. “Not even the sweatiest, smelliest players on my team can handle my post-match stench. Yet, you love it.”
You had to try on those shorts. Even if they were going to be a bit big for your smaller frame, you needed to feel the damp fabric against your ass.
You took the shorts away from your nose, it wasn’t easy to say goodbye to the scent, and pulled them up over your black underwear. Huh, it was a tighter fit than you expected. The sweat-soaked material wrapped snugly around your butt and you could feel the moisture soak into your underwear. You pinched at the shorts and it was so skin tight that all you could feel was the heavier, wet underwear fabric beneath.
Wait, the shorts weren’t just skin tight, there were actually no shorts on you at all. Of course there were no shorts, you had been in your room in just your underwear the entire time. What were you doing again?
You aimlessly wandered around your house trying to think of what you were supposed to be doing. You eventually sat down on a seat in the living room, scratching your empty head in confusion.
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“Bro, if I swung that way I’d definitely hit that ass up.” It was your roommate. He was straight as anything, and a total bro. He was staring at your butt; your big bubble butt. “Why do you always have to stick that massive thing out like that, you’re going to make me hard one day if you don’t be careful.”
“Are you sure it doesn’t make you hard already?” You joked, leaning your body forward and sticking out your dump truck ass a little further. “An ass like this is very popular with boys like you.” You loved teasing your straight roommate.
He took a cautious step forward then pinched his nose in disgust. “Your ass reeks bro, have you just come back from the gym?”
The gym, of course! That’s the thing you were planning on doing this whole time. You quickly got changed into your gym gear, throwing your black underwear on the floor of your room, and rushed out the door.
The gym felt like home to you. You couldn’t wait to lift up some weights and get your sweat on, and boy did you sweat. You were only on your first exercise and already a large sweat mark had formed under the band of your grey compression shorts.
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As you continued your workout you kept getting sweatier and sweatier. It wasn’t long until your shorts were completely drenched. 
The best part were the slaps of encouragement your ass would receive from the gym bros. The slaps would make a satisfying squelch noise and then your bubble butt would jiggle like jelly. This was usually followed by a comment fawning over your dump truck ass or congratulating you about how sweaty and smelly you were (to the gym bros this was a sign of a good workout). To say you were getting a lot of attention was an understatement. You were enjoying every second of it too, even making sure to bend over and stick your butt out when one of your jacked fans walked past.
Once you finished your workout you headed straight home without showering. Why waste all of that beautiful sweat you worked so hard for?
When you arrived home you stumbled across a very fortunate surprise. It was your roommate, and he was on the floor of your room sniffing the sweaty black underwear that you left there.
“Now are you sure I don’t make you hard?” You said with the smuggest grin. He turned around to meet your gaze and he was in complete shock. His face turned bright red and he couldn’t get a single word out. “How pathetic.” You said, changing to a deeper and more condescending tone. “Not even the sweatiest, smelliest men in the gym can handle my post-workout stench. Yet, you love it.”
You lifted up your shirt to show him your spectacular body that glistened with sweat. “No point denying it, you're in love with me.” You were literally talking down to him. “And most of all, you’re in love with my sweaty body.”
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Your roommate sprang up from the ground and began frantically licking the crevices of your hairy abs. You grabbed his head and pushed it into the damp abyss between your two amazing pecs. Moans of pure happiness reverberated into your chest, which only made you push his face in harder.
Once you felt he was done with your chest you shoved his body to the ground. “It’s time for the main course,” you said with a grin. You turned around so your massive butt was facing towards him. Your shorts were so drenched that sweat was dripping off them onto your housemate’s body.
“Yes please, I need a taste!” Your housemate begged.
You lowered your behemoth ass onto his face. Both cheeks spread around his face and touched the floor. His face was completely trapped in the dampest, rankest, nastiest, foulest cage imaginable. You couldn’t tell if he was screaming in joy or screaming for release but either way the vibrations felt amazing as they rippled through your cheeks. How lucky that he has a stinky, sweaty housemate who is willing to use his fat, pillowy butt to indulge his fantasies.
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enkas-illusion · 5 months
Text
3, 2, 1… Blow The Candle 
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Fandom / Pairing: Jujutsu Kaisen / Geto Suguru x f!reader
Rating: NSFW/Explicit - MINORS DO NOT INTERACT
Genre/Theme: Established relationship; non-sorcery au
Content warning: fluff, eventual smut, oral (m.receiving), explicit sexual content, language, angst, sexually frustrated Geto.
Summary: What is the best birthday gift for Suguru, you ask? Riling him up till he reaches his breaking point before surprising him on his birthday with a gift he’ll never forget (aka, you give him the best head he’s ever received).
Author's Note: Hello, I was down bad for Suguru, wanting to give him the glock-glock 9000 and boom, this one-shot was born. I was too lazy to write the entire smut scene but let me know if you’d like a Part 2, I could use the extra motivation T.T 
Thank you for reading! 
~ Eren’s Birdie
Song Dedication: Religion by Lana Del Rey
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Geto Suguru wasn't the kind to celebrate his birthdays with much enthusiasm — it's not that he hated them… he just couldn't care less about them. For him, it was just a reminder of another year passing. And although he never said it out loud for fear of sounding too cheesy, he cared more about the time he got to spend with his people.
So this year, you wanted to please your boyfriend in a way that he preferred, giving him a good time that would be hard to forget. You’d both taken leaves from work for tomorrow to get some alone time all day together before going out for dinner with friends.
With just a few hours till midnight, you were making mental notes of everything you had planned for tomorrow, ticking each item off your checklist. Last year, you’d gotten him an electric guitar, based on Satoru’s recommendation – which Suguru loved, of course, but he had joked that you could simply bake him a cake and he’d be the happiest man on earth.
Which was ironic coming from someone who’d constantly bombard you with flowers and presents for relationship milestones and celebrations that were days or even months away. Suguru was all for spoiling his girl but when it came to receiving, his love language was, more often than not, physical touch.
And that’s what you decide you’d do. Your plan was to make tonight extra special. So, while you had materialistic gifts lined up, you had other things in mind to please the birthday boy.
You’d asked a friend to bake a batch of hash brownies, paying extra for good quality stuff, since you knew that’s how Suguru liked it – he was the type to easily distinguish good quality weed from the subpar one. 
You’d also ordered a custom made jersey of his favourite rugby team with his birth date ‘03’ on the back. Since Suguru can sniff out a surprise in an instant, you’d taken extra steps to get it delivered at Satoru’s address instead of yours.
On your way back from work in the evening, you’d received a call from your boyfriend, asking if you could bring take-out since he was too occupied with work to take on dinner duties tonight. You’d agreed, secretly cheering as it would be the perfect opportunity to make a few stops to pick up the brownies from your friend’s and the jersey from Satoru’s place.
When you arrive home to find him seated at the dining table, eyes fixed on the table, you almost fear that he’d gotten back earlier than expected.
“Baby, weren’t you working till late?” you question as you place the food parcel on the table before walking towards him to place a kiss on his temple. He brings his hand up to give you a side hug, not peeling his eyes off the screen.
“I am, I brought the work laptop home since I figured it’d take too long… would rather work here till late than at the office.” 
“Will you be working late into the night?” you ask, feeling a bit disappointed.
“Oh no, I’d be done before midnight hopefully… I know your obsession with wanting to be the first to wish me.” he chuckles. You quickly make an excuse of freshening up to hide your handbag into the cupboard, before returning to the living room again for dinner.
When you’re done with dinner, he quickly gets back to typing away hastily on his laptop. You quietly make your way to the bedroom, locking it behind you. You take the jersey, the box of brownies and other gifts out of your fully stuffed handbag… thanking the heavens for the nth time that your boyfriend was too focused on work to notice anything odd.
After wrapping his gifts and stacking them away in the cupboard, you take your time to shower and shave for the special occasion. You put on a white, skimpy, lace lingerie that leaves barely anything to the imagination before wearing his rugby jersey on top. You twirl in front of the mirror, noting that the jersey nearly covers your ass but would ride up easily if you bent down.
Your heart beats faster as you place a pair of leather handcuffs in a red paper box with black ribbon, placing it next to the box of brownies on the bed. You knew things were going to get wild so you recall your safe word ‘monkey’ just in case, but don’t fixate on it much since you trusted your boyfriend to know just how much he can push you before it gets too much. 
You had mentally prepared yourself for a sexually frustrated Suguru since you hadn’t allowed him to touch you for about 15 days now, which was the longest he’d gone without your touch ever since you started living together almost more than a year ago.
Usually you’d run to him to fuck you on your period since it always helped you with your cramps, but for the first week, it became an excuse to act cranky and bratty, which he took without complaining. You were aware that you probably shouldn’t press his buttons so much since his payback would be 10 times worse but you couldn’t help yourself since it was just so damn easy to rile him up. It revealed his animalistic side in bed, leaving no room for the gentle lover that he sometimes was, and you were a sucker for that.
You loved being ravaged by him because the aftercare was even better. Besides, it wasn’t easy for you either, to act so dumb and innocent in front of him while actively trying to seduce him throughout this whole week. You wanted nothing more than to jump his bones when he wasn’t even trying to seduce you. Your boyfriend was simply existing and it was enough to get you wet. 
At the beginning of your relationship, he’d quickly realised you were on par with him when it came to being horny to the point of borderline sex addict. For a short time, he had your number saved as ‘my succubus <3’ briefly to tease how much you craved his touch all the damn time. It didn’t last for long however, since you made him change it back to your name when Satoru accidentally read it when you’d called Suguru’s phone and started calling you that out loud at insanely inappropriate times in public. 
So imagine your boyfriend’s surprise and confusion when you, of all people, were asking for space because you ‘simply don’t feel like it.’ He respected your wishes, being a respectful gentleman, not wanting to overwhelm you.
Though you knew his patience was wearing thin and almost broke 3 days ago. You’d gotten out of the shower and dropped your towel to the ground as you paced around the room naked, taking longer than usual to decide what dress to put on, moving your hips seductively to The Weeknd’s more explicit and dirtier songs playing softly on your phone. He’d muttered a ‘for fuck’s sake’ before making his way to the bathroom for a quick shower, trying to calm himself down. He only stepped out of the bathroom when he was certain you’d left the house, a few moments after gently knocking on the bathroom door to inform him that you were leaving for work.
When Satoru had asked you why Suguru had been more irritated for the last two weeks, you told him about denying him sex to rile him up. Satoru chuckled, calling you devil incarnate… maybe so, but this devil was sure going to have the time of her life soon so it was a win-win for you.
As you spray on some perfume you know he loves, you hear his voice call out your name. You check the time and gasp – it’s 11:49PM. You place the red box on the bed for later, checking yourself out and fixing your hair one last time before opening the bedroom door.
“Baby, did you fall asleep?” Suguru speaks while sliding it into the bag and placing it on the coffee table. His back is turned to you so you think he doesn’t notice you tip-toeing into the living room.
“And here I was thinking you almost forgot it’s my birthd-” he abandons the joke, his words getting caught in his throat when his eyes land on you as he turns around. 
“Hi,” you giggle sheepishly, suddenly conscious about the way his eyes roam over your body. But you snap out of it just as quickly.
Pull yourself together – you have a plan to execute, a mission to accomplish!
“Sugu, do you like your present? The jersey?” you ask, feigning innocence as you twirl in place. He’s checking you out shamelessly with a devilish look on his face, “Love it.” 
“Hmm. Maybe you should put it on to see if it fits.” you reply as you seductively remove the top and toss it at him. He catches it, a cocky smile plastered on his face as he observes your antics in amusement – so this is what the forced abstinence was about.
“You’re right, we really should make sure it fits.” he peels off his own shirt before putting the jersey on in one swift motion. 
“Perfect.” you smile at him as you walk to where he’s standing near the sofa, your hands landing on his chest as you caress the fabric gently to smoothen the crinkles.
You could melt under how intense his gaze feels. You bite your lip as you blush, hands moving up to rest on his shoulders. He gives your ass a firm squeeze before lightly spanking it, causing you to yelp in surprise as his arms snake around your waist, trapping you.
“Baby, you are in so much trouble tonight.” he brings his lips closer to your ear, biting your earlobe.
“I’m counting on it.” you giggle at the tingling sensation of his lips on your neck. You pull yourself out of his arms and he lets you, following behind when you guide him by his wrist to settle him on the sofa.
“Let me make it up to you, birthday boy,” you say, bending down in front of him, intertwining your fingers with his to pin them to his sides.
You kiss him softly and ever so slowly before letting it deepen. Even with you trying your best to not let him touch you just yet, you know it's a useless effort given that your strength is nothing compared to his. Suguru tightens his grip, fingers still tightly intertwined with yours as he moves your hands to your lower back to lock them there.
You try to wiggle your hands out of his hold and feel him letting go. You try to take back control but his rough grip on your hips indicates otherwise as he pulls your body onto his till you're straddling him. 
You let out a groan as you put your hands on his chest and pull away to catch your breath, feeling his hard poke against your ass. Your hand reaches to your side to pull his wrist to your face as you check his watch, the screen lighting up just on time as 11:59PM turns to 12:00AM.
“Happy…” you give him a small peck on his forehead, “Birthday…” another one on the tip of his nose, “Babyyy.” last one landing on his lips.
He's smiling into the kiss as his grip relaxes a bit. You take the opportunity to slowly move down till you’re kneeling between his legs. You hastily unbutton his pants and he lifts his hips up to let you take them off completely.
Your hand strokes his dick as you lick the tip gently. You slide down his foreskin to reveal his wet tip, your mouth watering at the sight – Suguru might just have the prettiest dick you’ve ever seen.
“Missed this lil’ guy so much.” You tease and he lets out a snort, if there’s one thing that Suguru will never take an offence at is you joking about his dick, it simply doesn’t faze him – and why would it? He knows he’s big.
Your tongue rolls over his tip, causing him to sink down into the sofa, spreading his legs out further. You lick up the base before taking a few inches in your mouth as you hear your boyfriend let out a low groan.
He rests his head back as his eyes close, enjoying the way your tongue feels on his cock after so long. The peace doesn't last however, when his phone rings in the pocket of his pants. 
Mouth still connected to him, you reach a hand down to where his pants are bundled up and pull out his phone to silence it, tossing it onto the sofa next to him. You look up at his face as your mouth moves up and down his length. 
His phone rings again in a few seconds.
“For fucks sake…” he mutters as he looks at who's calling. You release his dick from your mouth, letting your hand take over.
“Who is it?” You ask, kissing at the base.
“Satoru.” he sighs, running his hands through his hair in frustration, “He's gonna keep calling till I answer.”
“It's okay, go ahead,” you assure him, your hands still.
He nods as he answers the call. But right as he's about to greet his best friend on the other end, you take him in your mouth, letting his tip hit the back of your throat slightly as you steady your hands on his thighs.
Suguru cusses out a loud ‘fuck’ as his hands move to your hair, gripping at your strands to steady your movements.
“Hello?” You can hear Satoru's confused tone.
“Sorry… I hit my… elbow.” Suguru speaks into the phone, almost mumbling the excuse, eyes closing as he tries to collect his thoughts.
“Happy birthdayyyyyy best frienddd!” You hear the blondie's sing-song squeal.
“Thank you Satoru.” Suguru says rather plainly, trying to sound as serious as he can. You’re determined to break him though, so you suck him the way only you know makes him lose his mind each time.
He moans as his hand wraps around your hair to take it in a makeshift ponytail. He yanks it… you know it's his way of asking you to behave. 
“I was honestly gonna knock on your door with a cake at midnight… but my favourite bakery was closed since the owner's away… thankfully, she'll be here tomorrow so I'll see you in the morning with only the best cake ever! Soooo what were you up to?” you hear Satoru's rambling on the other end, loving that him being so talkative is wearing Suguru’s patience out.
Your hands move to massage his balls and the base of his cock while your head bops in a steady rhythm, earning a soft groan as he moves his phone away from his face, putting it on mute. 
“Careful baby, this is your only warning.” he groans before unmuting. You release his dick with a pop.
Satoru is still going on when you hear him ask if he's the first to wish Suguru. Just as your boyfriend opens his mouth to speak, you lick at his sensitive tip, almost causing him to moan. He clears his throat to cover it up as he struggles to speak, “yeah… you are.”
“No way! So I beat your girl to it?!” Satoru rejoices.
“Yeah you did… She’s aslee- I’d hate to… wake her up… Bye.” Surugu cuts the call, not waiting for a reply. He tosses his phone to the side, eyes staring you down as you keep on blowing him.
“Baby, if you enjoy having your face stuffed so much…” his grip on your hair tightens while his other hand caresses your cheek briefly, deceitfully gentle, “... let me show you how it’s done.” 
Before you can register his words, you feel his dick hit the back of your throat, tears instantly welling in your eyes. You choke, letting out a few muffled moans and whimpers as he face fucks you, taking back his control.
The intensity feels too much but not enough for you to bail just yet. For times like these, where you cannot speak, you had a safe gesture, tapping his ass thrice on repeat… he’d protested initially by suggesting you do something else but you’d justified it by saying this was the only action that would seem out of place. He has accepted by now that, when it comes to arguments, he can never really win against you. He gave in eventually, still confident you wouldn’t ever need to use it cause, “I’m sure you’ll take anything I give you like a good girl.” One would say he was being too cocky but his words were like holy scripture, you obeyed every single word. 
Within minutes, he’s warning you that he’s about to cum, since he knows you’ve never really been a fan of swallowing. He’s about to pull out to cum on your tits but you swat his hand away, surprising him by sucking him even more fervently. Such a simple action is enough to make him lose his mind. He shoots his load into the back of your throat, warm liquid filling your mouth as you struggle to swallow it all.
When he pulls his cock out, a string of saliva connects it with your lips. You bring the back of your hand up to wipe your lips while he leans down to wipe your tears off your cheeks.
As he observes the black residue of mascara on his fingers, you grip his thighs for support as you stand up. He looks back at you, “God… I love you.”
“I love you too Suguru.” you smile at him as he digs his fingers into the flesh of your thighs, pulling you closer to kiss your abdomen. You giggle and run your fingers through his hair. He brings his arms up to secure them around your lower back before tackling you to the sofa in one quick motion, moving to position himself on top of you.
“SUGURU! I almost had a heart a-” he shuts up your complaint with a kiss and you let your words melt as you kiss him back, moaning at the way his hands rake whatever area of your skin they can find.
Your hands automatically move to his hair as he leaves hungry half kisses over your neck, making his way down to one of your breasts. He licks and bites the hard bud from over your bra, causing you to whimper at the touch. He repeats the action on your other nipple as wet patches form on the fabric.
Your breath hitches when you feel two fingers rub at your clothed pussy, already wet with your arousal.
“Wait… Sugu– please, wait.” you breathe out as he rubs your folds with more pressure. 
“Baby, I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep without fucking you tonight.” he groans as his eyes find yours, his face contorted.
“Suguru, I’m not letting you sleep a wink tonight…” you reassure him, cupping his face in your hands to give him a quick peck, “... but please take me to the bedroom first, I might have another present or two for you.”
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kynrki · 2 years
Text
— it was all a miscommunication
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wc: 1.3k, pairing: niki x fem!reader, genre: angst + fluff, warnings: swearing
REQUESTED? yes by anon! <33
AN — here is jealous niki!! hope you all enjoy <33
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it was 9pm and you were at a party. great right? well yeah, especially since you were there with your boyfriend niki. he had asked you nicely to come with him and who were you to say no?
“baby im gonna go sit with the boys okay?” niki said as he slowly released the hand that was lying on your waist. he smiled at and looked in your eyes. you nodded as you smiled and quickly gave him a kiss on his lips before you went off the sit with your friend, yuna.
“yn my love!” yuna said as you walked closer to her. “hey girl!!” you said as you sat next to her on the couch. you two were catching up on all the drama and all the news around the school, which you two normally did at lunch. “so you and niki?” yuna teased as she nudged your side slightly. “hes so sweet honestly, i really like him” you said as your eyes traveled to said boy. you smiled and turned your attention back to yuna. “i think we can all see, you two are jus too cute, i want what you two have” yuna pouted. you laughed at her.
while yuna was talking about her crush and their mini interaction, you felt the couch beside you dip. you turned your head and saw non other than yeonjun. you knew about him, everyone did. he was on the rugby team with niki. “hi” he huffed out. “hi” you said as you smiled at him.
unbeknownst to you, from across the room a certain someone was watching this whole interaction go down and didnt like it. he furrowed his eyebrows and clenched his jaw slightly. he didnt like how you were laughing with him. nor did he like how close he was sitting to you. “dude calm down, if it bothers you so much then jus go up there and do something” jake said after he saw how worked up niki got. “nah its cool” niki said without taking his eyes off from you.
“so you single?” yeonjun asked as he took a sip from his drink. “no, my boyfriend’s niki, you two are on the same rugby team no?” you said to him. “ahhhh niki! oh so you’re the one making him so happy lately isn’t it” yeonjun teased as he laughed at your expression. you started blushing and looked away for a moment. niki definitely didn’t like that. how could he make you blush like that? his own partner?
you were still laughing and enjoying your conversation with yeonjun when suddenly someone shouted your name. “yn” niki said coldly as he glared at yeonjun. “oh hey man i was jus-“ “shut the fuck up yeonjun. come on we’re going home yn” niki interrupted yeonjun as he held out his hand for you to grab. “but i thought-“ “lets go yn” niki said once more. you sighed and stood up. “sorry yeonjun, it was great to meet you!” you said as you smiled at him before niki grabbed you and walked out.
“niki what the fuck was that about” you said as you stood outside by his car. “get in the car yn” niki said as he walked to the drivers side. “no! what is your issue, cant i have-“ “get in the car yn.” niki said as he looked at you. you didn’t recognise the look he had in his eyes. it was cold, it wasn’t niki. you sighed as you got into the car.
on the way home you both sat in silence. it was awkward, to say the least. you didn’t know what happened and why he was acting like this but there was no way you were gonna let him treat you as if you were something he owned.
once you got home, niki opened the door and went straight to your room. “so you’re not gonna explain yourself?” you shouted slightly. “fine, im gonna go back to that party that i was actually enjoying.” you shouted and turned around, heading towards the door. “you better not” niki said as he started walking down to the living room where you were. “why? give me one reason why the fuck you decide we were gonna leave” you said frustratedly. niki kept quiet.
“unbelievable” you laughed and turned back to the door. “no” he said as he grabbed your wrist. “niki let me go” you said as you looked at him seriously. “why do you want to go back? so you can cuddle up to yeonjun again? so that he can make you blush? so that you two can flirt again? are you forgetting that you’re my girlfriend yn?” niki said frustratedly. “is this all because you’re fucking jealous? seriously niki? i didnt act like this when you had like 5 girls lining up to talk to you.” you shouted in anger. “that’s different” niki said. “how? how! is it different niki” you shouted in his face. “because unlike you i know when to fucking stop. i know not to fall for their traps. im fucking loyal yn!” niki shouted back.
you were taken aback. you heart dropped. you arent…loyal? tears started collecting in your eyes. “what” you whispered in disbelief. niki finally looked you in your eyes and he felt regret. the words left his mouth all too fast and he wasn’t thinking. it was in the heat of the moment type of thing and he didn’t mean it. his eyes widened at the tears that were dripping down your face. “yn i-“ “please just” you interrupted him as continuous tears fell down your face. niki felt bad. tears started brimming in his eyes too as you ripped your hand from his hold and walked towards the guest room. “yn” niki tried to call out for you again. you shook your head and laughed slightly. “and to think that i thought i was enough for you. please just leave me alone niki” you said sadly as you closed the guest rooms door.
niki sighed in frustration as he gripped his hair with his hands. he started sobbing. it was so hard that his heart started hurting. he cant believe the fact that he let his jealousy and insecurities take over him. his past relationships weren’t the best, and you knew that but when he was with you it felt different but he fucked up everything once again. oh how he wished he could turn back time. “im so sorry baby” he whispered while crying and soon he fell asleep from exhaustion.
“hey love” you whispered sadly. after about 2hrs of sitting in the guest room you decided to come outside for a snack but instead you were met with your boyfriend who was sleeping on the couch with tear stained cheeks. niki’s eyes slowly fluttered open upon you calling his name. you gently brushed his hair away from his face. “lets go sleep in our room okay?” you said softly to him. he nodded his head and got up while yawning. “im so sorry baby, i didn’t know what i was thinking” niki said as tears started forming in his eyes again. “hey hey, its okay, how about we go sleep and talk about this tomorrow morning okay? i forgive you baby, now come” you said as you gave him a comforting smile. he nodded and walked to your room.
once you both were settled in bed, he wrapped his arms around your waist and rested his head in your shoulder. “close your eyes and go sleep, im not angry at you i promise” you said as you kissed his forehead. “i don’t deserve you” niki said with his eyes closed. you smiled and played with his hair as he drifted off into dream land.
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1K notes · View notes
seungstarss · 2 years
Text
CUPID’S LAW | NEVER FALL IN LOVE
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PAIRING › Play boy! Heeseung x fem! reader
SYNOPSIS › After a bland highschool experience, you immediately gravitate to your university’s most outrageous matchmaking club, “The Cupid Club.” Your job was simple: to collect information on your client’s love interest and then pair them together. After two years on your “job,” everything became less horrific and getting couples together almost seemed like a natural occurrence. That is until you’re tasked to collect information on Lee Heeseung, the infamous rugby captain who is coincidently known as the biggest player on campus.
GENRE› college au, angst (I said it was major angst in the preview, but after writing it, I realized that it’s not actually that sad), consultant! reader x rugby captain! Heeseung, heartbreak, crack, fluff
WARNING(S) › swearing, heavy drinking, mentions of sex
WORDCOUNT › 18.4k (I apologize beforehand)
NOTES › This is my entry for @jungwoniics ’ “just out of reach” collab
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Love was an unexplained phenomenon that entwined souls together. It was an experience of rather difficult trifles which blossomed into ultimate bliss. To be with someone you found truly admirable and to lead a life with them for as many years as they lasted was society’s idea of a dream come true. Love seemed to be something like a goal to people, while to others, it was rather a burden. To you, it was a lackluster ordeal filled with complications and hurdles — an experience you didn’t want to indulge in.
You hated when September strolled along. Every autumn leaf gracefully leaving the comfort of the branches to experience the harsh winter chills yet again this cycle. It was similar to all the young adults who traveled distances away from the warmth of their homes to lead a rather dreadful college life.
The giddy freshmen were always entertaining to watch. The yearning they all had to start fresh, lead a new life, to grow, and become a part of society.
That is what college was
A greater look into society.
You had grown weary of the customs of welcoming newcomers to the school. Their excitement clearly not phasing you in the slightest. The way they would greet you and ask you for directions. You had found them cute before, but now, you couldn’t spare another waking moment guiding a freshman through the halls, introducing them to every passing professor you came across. You had grown tired. People made you tired.
In freshman year, you joined the school’s consulting club, “the Cupids Club.” You found the name rather stupid, but the more you grew to understand the club, the more fitting it seemed to be. It wasn’t any consulting club — it consisted of bringing two people together, two people who failed to communicate their feelings to one another. The heavy burden of match-making was one of the stress-inducing activities in addition to your own school work. Yet, you found it intriguing to bring people together and watch them form a special bond with each other.
Your job was simple, to analyze the receiver of love. To learn about their dislikes and likes, hobbies, and any other useless pieces of information. Your job was to convey these pieces of information to the person consulting you for assistance. It was a simple job.
So what made it so difficult?
You grew to realize that freshmen were the worst clients. All of them fresh into college and wanting to obtain and secure their significant other without their parent’s constant blabbing. Freshmen had the highest expectation. Once a first-year finds out about the school’s Cupid club, the rest of the freshmen automatically know too. And with so much attention and desire, they were never kind with their requests. Their demands strayed too high, and most of them went for unobtainable matches.
For example, Lee Heeseung.
The lad wasn’t exactly unobtainable. He was rather easy to woo, but he wasn’t easy to keep.
You had received a total of twenty requests, asking for you to set them up with Mr. Lee Heeseung before Valentine's day. Except there was an issue.
You knew nothing about the boy.
Sure, you had heard of him before. Most of the requests regarding him were given to students in his year to manage. You were a year below Heeseung, and the only thing you could conclude about the boy was that he was a gigantic player.
“Could you please set him up with me before Valentine's day, please?” The younger girl with strawberry blonde hair squirmed in her chair, looking up at you with her doll-like eyes. “I heard you’re one of the best consultants here and I really like him. So you’ll be able to do it right?”
How many times have you heard the same phrases of flattery that slipped out of their lying mouths? Praises, bribes, and baseless words — they used anything to earn a simple yes from you. You rejected everything of course, because all you cared for was someone genuine.
And that person came.
She was a year older than you, the same age as Heeseung. The girl had short beige hair and braids that pulled her hair into a half ponytail. She wasn’t very tall, but the girl was gorgeous. The way her eyes curved into crescent moons when she smiled made you almost envious. She spoke in a soft whispering tone and requested politely, unlike the previous girls who demanded your service.
“Um, hi,” the girl nervously tucked her side bangs behind her ear, looking at the floor. Her entire face was tomato red. “Could I request a favour?”
She was cute. The way she looked away, avoiding eye contact. She was the type of girl every boy wanted as a significant other. The girl didn’t even explain her whole situation, and you already felt the need to help her — to pair her up with whoever she had been yearning for.
“Yeah, of course!” You rested your chin on your palm, waiting for her to muster up the courage to tell you about her crush. “Just tell me your situation and who this person is.”
“Oh right! Well, I’ve liked him ever since freshman year. I met him in one of my classes and he, uh… he lent me a pencil. I mean, I don’t like him because of that! He’s really charming and good-looking. But the issue is, he’s popular and I doubt he even knows who I am. I heard… I heard he’s a player too.” She mumbled, fidgeting with the latch of her tote bag.
Okay, what was with these absolute catches liking the worst kinds of people? After a few years of this whole cupid consultant shit, you’ve come to notice how unfair it was — The way the best people were always attracted to the shittiest men.
“Oh no, not a player,” you sighed, scribbling the info down on your notepad. “Oh, I forgot to ask, your name is?”
“Yeeun. Jung Yeeun.”
Did she just say Jung Yeeun? Your eyebrows furrowed in absolute shock. “Jung Yeeun? As in the literature gold Medalist Jung Yeeun?” Your jaw was probably on the floor right now, but that didn’t matter when someone with such achievements stood in front of you.
“Oh… yeah.” The girl blushed, looking down at her fingers.
Gosh, she was cute. You found it odd how her mysterious crush hadn’t noticed her throughout these years. After all, she was the Jung Yeeun, and she was absolutely stunning.
“Oh my god. Um, this is so off-topic, but I really admire your work! The way your words flow and the way you intertwine emotions into your writing. Honestly, you’re amazing.” You were truly giddy to finally meet the faceless writer you had been admiring ever since freshman year.
“Oh what? You admire my work?” The girl gasped, looking up at you with her round doe eyes once again. “I don’t know what to say. It means so much to me!”
This time, you gave her a genuine smile. She was the first person this semester to come to you with such courtesy, plus she was talented and so warmhearted? You had struck gold with her and you couldn’t wait to provide any necessary help. “Of course! I’ll also do my best to help you with your crush!”
“Really? I don’t have to appeal or tell you more about my situation?”
“Nope, I just need his name and we’ll be set!” Out of all the clients you “interviewed,” she was the only one who appealed to you, and genuinely, even though it had only been a few minutes, you wanted the best for her. “Also, we can set up a date for weekly meetings so I can forward to you any information I’ve learned about them. Of course, I’ll give you advice too, since that’s my job.”
“What? You’re so kind! I don’t know how to thank you enough.”
“No need,” you grinned, writing her name in your notebook. “I’ll make sure to take the most detailed notes on them to help you the best way I can.”
“Well…” Yeeun trailed off.
“His name is Heeseung. Lee Heeseung.”
What?
Out of everyone it could’ve been, it was him? The infamous senior, Lee Heeseung?
“Is there something wrong?” Yeeun panicked, moving her hand up and down in front of your face to bring you back to your senses. You could tell she was worried for you as your expression suddenly dropped upon hearing his name. “You look a bit pale, Yn.”
“Oh haha,” you chuckled nervously, clearing your throat in the process. “I was just shocked to hear his name. In all honesty, I think you can do better. I heard he’s a trashy person.”
“No, that’s what I heard too. But from the small conversations we had back in class, I think otherwise. He seems misunderstood.” Yeeun forced a smile, attempting to reassure you as you shook your head in disappointment.
One of those “I can change him” situations again. You sighed, writing the boy’s name in your notes along with Yeeun’s information. “Well, you’re right. I don’t know him so I can’t form an opinion on him from what I heard. But anyway, I will try my best to make things work.”
“Thank you, Yn. You’re so kind.”
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You were tasked with gathering information about this popular senior boy, and it wasn’t hard. The first person you consulted was Ryujin, your best friend, who was a year older than you, a senior.
“Oh gosh, your client wants Heeseung?” She inched backward in disgust. “He’s literally the worst person to have a crush on. He can’t commit for shit, plus he’s a whole-ass player who has no sense of pity for his former flings. But I mean, it really isn’t hard to earn his favour.”
Your interest perked up after hearing Ryujin’s last sentence. She had rambled for an entire hour about the boy already and said nothing particularly intriguing until now. “And how would someone quote — unquote earn his favour?”
“Frankly, it’s quite simple,” Ryujin smirked, holding up two fingers. “One, show up to one of his or his drunkard friend’s frat party. Two, wear some skimpy dress and seduce the man. He’s quite simple. It makes me gag.”
Shaking off the utter disgust on your face, you rolled your eyes at your friend’s words. What had you expected? Some player with a heart of gold who just hadn’t found their soulmate? You probably spent too much time burying your nose in romance novels to see what reality was like. Even with a position as a love consultant, most of your pairings had worked out and your efforts had never gone to waste. But this time, Yeeun’s request seemed almost fruitless. “Gosh, why did I just know?”
“I mean, he is a player, after all. He’s easy to woo but hard to keep. Your poor client is definitely in a rough spot. But I don’t really know too much about him, so I can’t really speak on his actions.”
“You literally spent the whole past hour roasting the dude.” You scoffed at your friend in amusement.
“Well, I mean, after everything I’ve heard about him, I can’t help it.” The older girl smirked, pushing through the doors of the library. “I mean, I heard there’s a game after school. Maybe we can go together and you can analyze him then.”
“A game? He’s an athlete?”
“Yn, you really are clueless about this man, huh?”
“Maybe.”
Tying your hair in a simple ponytail, you grabbed the pale white tote bag that consisted of your notebook, where you kept all your client notes. You leaned against the doorframe of the washroom, tapping your fingers on the marble sink as you waited for Ryujin to finish straightening her hair. “Girl, are you trying to impress someone today? Like you look too good for a simple game.”
Ryujin shot you a sly smirk before returning to straighten the locks that fell to the left side of her face. “Your flattery is giving me too much confidence sis, but maybe.”
You sighed at the girl’s words. “So the truth is, you dragged me to this game just to accompany you, so you could flirt with some jock? I mean, I’m willing to be your emotional support, but girl, I’d rather off myself instead of watching you attempt to flirt.”
“Hey! I'm good at flirting! Plus, you needed to come anyway, right? You need to analyze Mr. Lee Heeseung.” The girl sang, unplugging the straightener. You had to remind yourself that Ryujin was rather popular and had a consistent social life, unlike you, who spent hours crying into your textbooks and a hundred pages of notes.
“Whatever. Shouldn’t we get going?” You cocked your head to the side as you watched your friend put on her dangly silver earrings. “I mean, it starts in twenty minutes, doesn’t it?”
“It’s literally around the corner. It takes five minutes to walk there. No need to rush.” The girl winked at you. “But you’re right, we should head there a few minutes early.” She quickly snatched the beige purse that hung on walls near the entrance, dragging you with her at the same time.
You slipped on your shoes as fast as you could to match Ryujin’s pace. She was definitely excited about seeing this game, and you just couldn’t feel the same way. Something about Yeeun’s request rubbed you the wrong way. Of course, it wasn’t the girl, but it was Heeseung himself. The thought of you getting them together only to have him cheat his way out of the relationship digested you to the max. The last thing you wanted was for Yeeun to get hurt. She was a sweet girl who deserved more than a half-hearted man who had a new fling every day of the week.
“You must be in deep concentration right now.” Ryujin smacked you on the back, bringing you back to reality. “Like hello? Girl, did you even notice that we’re almost there already?” Your eyes scanned your surroundings. The green grass below your feet and the bleachers that stood a few meters away from you definitely signified that you both were close to the playing field.
You hadn’t even noticed riding the elevator down, or heck, even locking the door because of your wandering thoughts. “Oh shit Ryu, did you lock the door?”
The girl scoffed and gave you a lazy grin. “Who do you think I am? Obviously, I had to take it upon myself since you were so wound up in your dreamland.”
“Dreamland my ass,” You rolled your eyes before clutching your friend’s arm, proceeding up the steps of the bleachers. “Where shall we sit?”
Ryujin dragged you back down and slowly approached the very front row, close to where the rugby team was getting ready. “Here obviously! You’re kinda blind, plus I have my reasons.”
“Girl, what the fuck?” You mumbled as you sat down next to Ryujin on the mini tarp she had put on the metal bleachers before sitting down. Right in front of you was the rugby team, some doing push-ups to warm up and some leaning against the bleachers talking to the cheerleaders.
“Shitt you actually came? Honestly, I didn't expect to see you here.” A boy with silver hair approached you and Ryujin while leaning against the tiny fence that separated the bleachers from the playing field. “And you brought a friend with you too? How interesting.”
“Cut the bullshit, Park,” Ryujin snapped. “I didn’t come here to listen to your nasally ass remarks. Kindly turn the fuck around and focus on your game.” She fakely smiled, gesturing for the boy to face around.
“Aw, you know you don’t have to act so hard to get.” The boy called “Park” chuckled. “But you, what’s your name?” He turned his attention to you, eyebrows raised in anticipation.
“It’s Yn, and I think my friend wants you to leave.”
The boy smirked in amusement, twirling his helmet with both his hands. “Oh, she’s feisty. You two make quite the combination.” This “Park” boy had only been standing in front of the two of you for a few seconds and you already wanted to slap the playful grin off his face. From the way he carried himself, you knew he was one of those boys too.
“Yeah, did you not hear her? Piss off, Park.” Ryujin shooed the boy, who only winked at her before making his way toward his teammates.
“Who the fuck-“
“Yes, I know you’re gonna ask questions Yn, I’ll explain.” Ryujin placed her hand on your shoulder, giving you a reassuring smile. The girl had told you everything about her life, but somehow this menace named “Park” was never mentioned in any of her stories. “That was Park Sunghoon, one of Heeseung's best buddies. He’s been trying to, I guess, ‘pursue me’ ever since freshman year? But of course, I rejected him every time. Yes, as you know, I have dated many people, but you will never catch me dead with one of those jocks, especially not Park Sunghoon.”
Park Sunghoon? Now his name sounded familiar.
You had heard his name slip through the mouths of many students roaming the hallways, but never matched his face to his name. He was well known throughout campus and was labeled the “deathly heartthrob.” Mainly because he never actually got into relationships. He was only an advocate for one-night stands, and friends with benefits, nothing else. The boy drew the line and only ever had physical interactions, never emotional.
“Oh, he’s Park Sunghoon,” you nodded your head, mentally connecting all the dots in your head. “Wait, but aren’t you trying to pursue some jock?”
“That’s a different story.” Ryujin inched closer to you, placing her hand over your ear before whispering. “You see, the boy over there?” She pointed ever so slightly at a boy in an oversized leather jacket who was holding a yellow water bottle.
“The yellow water bottle boy?” You questioned, squinting your eyes for a better view.
“Yeah, he’s the new manager on the team and he’s hella fine. Don’t you think so?”
You turned around to face Ryujin before throwing her a sarcastic grin. “Well, as you said, I'm blind, so I can’t see shit.”
The girl hit you gently, cackling at your response.
Before you could revert your focus to whatever was going on on the field, your eyes landed on a particular boy with raven black hair who was staring right back at you. His eyes seemed to pierce through your gaze, freezing you on the spot. You couldn’t move. You couldn’t even breathe in the presence of his stare. He was just a simple rugby jock who had both hands lazily tucked into his side pockets. So what made his gaze so enticing? Was it the way he looked at you? Or was it the way he licked his lips while shooting you a sly smirk?
“Who the fuck is that?” You shook Ryujin right after the boy shifted his vision elsewhere.
“Which one? You’re literally staring into a crowd of men.” She remarked, waiting for you to point to whoever this dude was.
“The one over there. The tall one with the parted black hair.” You motioned your head towards the boy’s direction, afraid to point or make any more unnecessary eye contact.
“Oh, that one?” Ryujin grinned. “That’s Mr. Play boy. Your target of today.”
That was Lee Heeseung?
The boy with the almost dangerous stare? Your heart fell into your stomach. You could already tell by the way his lips curved up into a sly smirk that Lee Heeseung was trouble.
Quickly pulling out your notebook, you began to scribble down your observations of the boy, who stood amused at your actions. He had diverted his gaze back to you a minute ago, only to see you frantically ask your friend a question and then proceed to pull out a notepad.
The buzzer blared throughout the court, signaling the beginning of the game, and the boys rushed to their positions, waiting for the game to commence. You always thought rugby was an odd sport — the aggressive shoving, and the constant growling. You a hundred percent preferred football. A few minutes of passing the ball had gone by before you grew bored, aggravated by the icy wind that kept blowing your hair in your face, blocking your view. You had to focus on Heeseung, but all you could get out of this game was that he was stubborn. The way he played, constantly trying to score points for his team, and the way he shoved members of the opposing team with his brute force without looking back — Heeseung always got what he wanted. You could tell from the simple expression he had on his face, eyes hungry and full of desire.
A stubborn man who always got his way. The worst kind to deal with.
The final buzzer went off, signaling the conclusion of the game. Your school won and you were anything but surprised. The only extra information you got out of coming to tonight’s game was that Heeseung seemed to be the captain of the team, and Ryujin sucked ass at flirting. Before you could jot your concluding thoughts down, you heard your friend clearing her throat as she slightly nudged you. She was standing up, arms entwined with the yellow water bottle boy, and she looked down at you, eyes practically begging. “Yn, is it okay if you head back to the dorms yourself? Here, I can give you the keys.” She rummaged through her purse, pulling out her metal keys with the bear keychain you had gifted her for her birthday. “I’m just gonna be out for a little longer. Is that okay?” She was giving you puppy eyes now.
You sighed, chuckling at your friend’s words. You weren’t going to stop her from getting with someone she fancied just because you were scared to walk back yourself. What kind of friend would you even call yourself if you ruined her chances just because the dark gave you chills? “No problem, give me a call if you need anything!” You smiled, gesturing for her to go ahead before shifting your attention back to your notes.
“Captain of the team, strong-willed I guess, stubborn.” You mumbled to yourself, listing down every piece of information you detected through tonight’s game.
“Having fun writing my name into your death note?” A low voice spoke, startling you. Instinctively, you brought your notebook to your chest, guarding the information you had gathered. You were never to share your notes with anyone but your clients. Even Ryujin hadn’t had the chance to skim through your notebook.
Your eyes landed on a particular raven-haired boy, who leaned teasingly against the fence. His hair wasn’t perfectly parted anymore, it was rather messy and dripping with sweat. Good thing the boy had a towel around his neck. Or else you’d probably scoot away from him.
Or would you?
He was a good meter away from you, and your eyes instinctively fell to his facial features, his tall nose bridge, his tanned complexion which seemed to glisten under the stadium light, and his lips.
His lips? What the fuck were you thinking?
You slightly gasped, realizing the situation you were in. Heeseung stood in front of you, staring at your every flicker of emotion and movement. Once again, your mind ran blank, unable to move or think.
“I’m joking,” the boy chuckled. “What are you writing so attentively that you only looked up at the game a few times?”
He had noticed every time that you spent jotting down notes instead of watching the game? What the hell? Did this man have eyes on the back of his head?
“It’s none of your concern.” You spoke forcefully, shoving your notebook into your bag.
“Did you find the game boring?” The boy snickered, his intense gaze not leaving yours.
“Maybe I did.” You got up, getting ready to leave.
Heeseung wasn’t going to let you leave at that moment. “Then what interests you?” The boy asked, looking up at you while leaning closer. Did this boy not understand the concept of personal space, or did he just lack awareness? Though you were standing up, you still felt the way his cocky grin held you down, forcing you to stay.
“Probably not you.” You snapped back at the boy. He emanated so much confidence and somehow, he had a hold on you, and you wanted nothing more than to run away.
“But didn’t you just get ditched by your friend?” He raised his eyebrows, unknowingly provoking you even more. “I mean, I must be quite interesting since you’re still here answering my questions.”
Number one of why you hated men of his kind. In their minds, the world revolves around them and every little thing that is of convenience to them; they use to further latch onto in order to get whatever they want. Heeseung knew how to talk, and you already knew you hated his guts.
“Right.” You gave him a fake smile before turning your back on the boy. “Well, maybe you were interesting, but your words are boring me, so do me a favour and shut your mouth.” You remarked, giving him one last wave before leaving the premise of his lurking gaze. It took you lots of confidence to tell people to shut up, but with him, it came naturally.
ENTRY LOG #1
First day of analyzing Lee Heeseung and he’s an absolute menace. He’s the stereotypical frat boy who has way too much time on his hands. An absolute rake. Though besides that, he is the captain of the school’s rugby team and is very dedicated to winning. From the way he carries himself, he seems to be very confident, but he’s also very skilled with his words. He knows how to charm people, and that may be a dangerous sign. However, this is just an outlook on the boy as he did not show any of his true personality — unless this is what his true personality is, a shitty playboy jock.
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The next time you saw Heeseung was on campus near the library. He was walking through the greenery area with his arms latched around two girls who wore short pleated skirts and heels too high for a simple lecture day. You totally understood dressing up, as you tried to dress your best during your first year of university. But ten-inch heels were a different story. They had their arms around him, either coddling his waist or his chest. You tried your best not to barf up this morning's breakfast, as the sight was triggering an awful churning in your stomach. Before you could turn your attention elsewhere, his eyes met yours and the same smirk found its way to his lips. You rolled your eyes at him before going off on your way. That was until the menace strolled up in front of you with his hands in his pocket.
“Enjoying the view so much, you had to stop and stare at me for a full minute?” He chuckled, walking backward since you hadn’t stopped walking forward. The cocky grin never left his face and your urge to push him off a cliff didn’t either.
“I thought I recognized one of the girls that you were with.” You blatantly lied, thinking of the first excuse that came to mind. “Speaking of the girls, where did they go?”
Heeseung’s grin only grew bigger at your lame excuse. His arms came to stop you from proceeding forward. “Don’t you know it’s rude to ‌walk away from someone when they’re trying to strike up an ethical conversation? They left after I told them I had something more interesting to do.” He smirked. “Plus, you suck at lying, don’t you? Your eyes dart whenever you lie. Did you know?”
He was damn good at analyzing people, and you knew he’d probably use that to impress the girls on campus who seemed to faint from his presence. “Morally ethical, huh? Sorry to burst your bubble, but nothing about you is morally ethical.”
“Oh, is that so?” Heeseung inched closer to you, and after quite a few steps back, you found your heels hitting the walls. There was no more space for you to back up against, and the sly smirk never left his face as he proceeded to step forward. He now only stood a few inches away from you — way too close for a mere stranger. “And how would you know?”
“I don’t,” you spat before harshly nudging the boy backward. “Just leave me alone, will you?” You mumbled, watching the boy stumble backward, amused by your actions.
“And would you like to?” Heeseung still managed to speak after you clearly rejected his advances. “You know I’m really good with my-“
“Shut your trap Heeseung.” You hissed, once again attempting to escape the awkward situation.
“You said my name for the first time!” He spoke enthusiastically. “The way it rolls off your tongue sounds really nice. You should say it more often!” He smirked, leaning back against the wall, not attempting to chase you.
You didn’t even bother glancing back at the boy, knowing if you did, you would be met with his painfully attractive smirk. Instead, you flipped the boy your middle finger.
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Your seat in the consulting office behind the desk felt rather odd. You hadn’t found out anything revolutionizing or world-changing about the boy, but you still sat in your seat — waiting for Yeeun to prance in and listen to all the information you collected. You honestly had nothing to say that was worthy of her time, and you even thought about canceling your appointment. That was only until you saw the girl push her way through the library doors, on her way to visit you in the small room you had in the quiet space.
“Yn!” she exclaimed as soon as she set foot in the room. “I was so excited for today I barely could eat! My stomach is churning! It’s so thrilling!”
You offered the girl a forced chuckle before flipping open your notebook. “Well, you see…” You trailed off, not knowing where to start. “To be honest, since it’s only been a few days and I haven’t really gotten the chance to see him much? But from the information I gathered, he seems to be a very head-strong person who’s very dedicated to his own craft.”
“Oh, no worries!” The smaller girl giggled. “Even hearing about his achievements makes me happy. You know he’s the captain of the rugby team, right? Isn’t that so cool? I wish I could’ve attended his game a few days back, but I had prior arrangements.”
You were almost glad she hadn’t come. What would be the outcome of her seeing Heeseung’s eyes glued onto you throughout the entire game like you had a target on your back? Or maybe, if she did come, his eyes would be on her instead.
“Yes, he’s a very high achieving person. But besides that, he seems like he’s an easy person to strike up a conversation with. So that’s a win for you, right?” You smiled at her enthusiasm. She really liked him, didn’t she? Even talking about him made the corner of her lips perk up into a shy smile.
“Yes, yes, it is. He won’t get bored with me if I can’t think of anything to say, right?”
You rolled your eyes before chuckling at your innocent upperclassman. “Of course Yeeun! He’ll be the one that won’t be able to shut up.”
Yeeun giggled at your comment and checked her phone quickly. “I actually have a short meeting today, so I may have to cut our appointment a little short. Is that okay?”
You gave the girl an affirming smile. “Of course, I didn’t really have too much information today anyway. But next week at the same time?”
She nodded, pushing her chair in before waving at you and exiting the room.
You let out a sigh of relief, organizing your notes before you, too, decided to exit this stuffy room. The library was a big, bright place full of windows and you didn’t want to be cooped up in a room with no natural light whatsoever.
As soon as you locked the door of the consulting office, you felt a strong gaze on the back of your head.
Maybe you should’ve stayed in the room.
“I should consider myself lucky, right? I was dreading coming here, but it seems like it’ll be quite entertaining instead.” His voice was loud enough for the reception desk to send the two of you glares.
“Why the hell do I always bump into you? Are you sure you’re not following me or something?” You wanted to curse him out for his timing. If he had come just a few minutes earlier, you could’ve perfectly set him up with Yeeun.
Heeseung scoffed at your assumption. Him following you? Why would he ever do that? “You can daydream all you want, sweetheart, but sorry to break it to you. I wasn’t.”
You, happy with his answer, gave the boy a sarcastic smile. “Oh, is that so? Well then, if you don’t mind, I’ll take my leave now.”
Maybe Heeseung did want to follow you right now as his hand quickly grabbed your wrist, turning you back around. “Where are you going?”
“I don’t think I’ve made it clear enough. I’m going A W A Y.  F R O M. Y O U.” You annotated every word with a certain passive-aggressiveness.
“I’ll tag along then.” He grinned. “You’re walking towards the back tables of the library. Near the windows, am I right?”
Shaking your wrist out of his grip, you turned around once again. “I don’t think I ever invited you.”
The boy stood staring at you as you made your way to the far back corner of the library, settling your books on the desk. You were decently surprised when he didn’t follow you.
Or so you thought.
“Who needs an invitation?” Heeseung dragged the chair across from you over to your side as he plopped down and leaned on the tabletop, way too close to your face. “It’s a public space, am I right?”
How many times had he done this already? Invading your personal space without giving a single fuck about how you felt.
But how did you feel?
You felt his hot breath hitting the nape of your neck, and you watched how his long eyelashes fluttered as he opened and closed his eyes. He was good-looking; you had to admit that. But you had no interest whatsoever.
Right?
“Move, you literally could sit anywhere else.” You shoved the boy slightly.
Unfazed by your attitude, he only chuckled, making your rage grow. “You know, if it were any other girl, they’d be begging for me to stay, right?”
“Oh, is that so? Well, then what should I do, huh? Apologize?” You spat, annoyed with his entitled attitude.
“Nah, you should do something else.” He leaned back in his chair while crossing his arms.
“And what is that?”
“Let me see what you were writing in your diary the other day.” He smirked, raising his eyebrow in amusement as he awaited your answer.
“First of all, it’s not a diary. Second, I wasn’t writing about you, and third, I have a right to privacy for my belongings.”
“Then if you’re not gonna show me your notebook or whatever, let me stay here.” He shot you a winning grin, placing his phone on the table to secure his spot.
“You did that just so you could stay, huh?” He always had a way with his words and your desire to punch him only grew.
“Oh, looks like I’ve been caught red-handed, huh?” He chuckled, leaning back on the table and staring at your constantly changing expressions. It would be an understatement to say that Heeseung enjoyed the way you talked to him. He had never felt such a thrill in his life other than the first time he rebelled against his parents in high school. You were bringing that spark back into his life and he didn’t want it to extinguish.
You shifted uncomfortably, directing your gaze back to the stack of textbooks you had brought with you for studying purposes. “What are you gonna get out of staying here and wasting your life away?” You mumbled, quite bothered by his presence.
He smiled, placing his finger on his chin whilst pretending to ponder. Maybe it was the sunlight hitting his face, but your gaze only remained on his eyes that shone a golden brown in the light. They glittered when he blinked, and somehow you felt time freeze once more. How many times had this boy made you feel like the revolving word had stopped? You were in a stupid library, contemplating if you should study, yet here you are, staring into some boy’s eyes while he pretended to think of some excuse.
Thank god he was looking away, or else you’d definitely be receiving a mouthful from him.
“I’m gonna watch you study. Maybe I’ll pick up some studying habits?” He blurted out after a good three minutes.
You scoffed, looking away after he had met your gaze again. “That doesn’t sound too fitting to your character.”
“I’m pretty sure you have to get to know someone before you fully judge their character. Am I right, miss cupid?”
Miss cupid?
Had he known you were part of the cupids club, spending your spare time matchmaking?
Or worse. Did he know your client was gunning for him?
“I heard you were in some matchmaking club. But I highly doubt that seeing the way you interact.” Heeseung remarked, playing with your pad of colourful sticky notes.
“So you’re a stalker?!” you gasped.
“No, I-I’m not!”
Maybe it wasn’t that bad — having Heeseung accompany you. He spent hours taking turns from staring at you, then to your textbook. Sometimes the boy would lean in to stare at your notes and you could feel your cheeks heating up at the proximity. You had slapped yourself a couple of times, snapping yourself out of this unfamiliar daze. It felt almost improper to spend time with your client’s love interest. But you were glad now. The sun had set and Heeseung was slumped over the table, sleeping comfortably on the stack of your textbooks. You giggled at the sight. Somehow, he looked almost innocent and unlike his regular smug self. His body moved up and down slightly. You didn’t want to bother the boy who was sleeping so soundly — but he was lying on top of your textbooks. It wouldn’t hurt if you just tapped him awake, right? Just as your hand approached to grab your books, the boy groaned slightly, wrapping his arms tightly around the stack of your textbooks. You almost let out a loud laugh as you saw the boy bringing the textbooks closer to him to get more comfortable. Who knew the infamous rugby captain needed to cuddle something to fall asleep?
You decided not to wake the boy as he would probably get cranky or start throwing a fit. You had enough of the boy’s attitude for a day — frankly for the rest of your life. Taking off the jacket you had, you placed it gently on his broad shoulders before you stuck the small post-it-note you had written a few minutes ago in front of him, on the table.
You fell asleep :/// See; I told you ‌that you should’ve done something better with your time! You could’ve gone to a party or even practiced your sport, but instead, you spent your time here! Also, I hope you don’t drool on my textbooks; they were hella expensive. I didn’t take them because I didn’t wanna wake you up. Return those to me tomorrow and bring my jacket too! (Yes, I left my jacket for you. Not because I care for you, but because it actually gets really chilly since they turn on the AC :( whatever, just make sure you return everything.)
And what you didn’t know was that Heeseung didn’t care about “wasting time,” because all he really desired was to rest — escape from all the burdens and titles he carried.
ENTRY LOG #2
Heeseung seems to be bearable when he’s not trying to sweet talk. His conversations, besides that, are actually genuine. He also seems to have ears everywhere. Whenever he wants to know something, he’ll be able to get stacks of information on that person. Besides that, he’s pretty entertaining? I think he just needs someone that genuinely likes him for him, instead of for his outlook. He may seem all “I’m the best” and flirty, but something tells me his smiles aren’t genuine. He needs someone to appreciate him for who he is… and Yeeun is perfect.
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You had spent hours the next few days working on your midterm seminar with your group mates, who didn’t seem to comprehend the importance of this group assignment. Meets ups happened frequently and your group mates listened well to your instructions. However, when they were off on their own to complete their personal assigned sections, most of them would slack off until the last minute. As the final slide organizer, you spent most of your time waiting for your group mates to hand in their completed parts to insert into the slides.
But it was already 11:30pm, and you were so close to crashing on the library desk you had been sitting at for the past four hours. Tapping your fingers impatiently, you opened and closed your text messages with your group members, hoping someone would send something in. You all had agreed on sending in your parts before 10pm, ensuring you had enough time to organize everything and get a good night of sleep before the seminar tomorrow morning. However, there wasn’t a single peep from your group mates and it was already halfway to twelve. Feeling the weight of all the stress, your eyelids began to grow heavy. A short nap wouldn’t harm you, and there was nothing better to do anyway. Setting your alarm for 12:30 am, you rested your head onto your forearm as you dozed off into dreamland.
Heeseung found it hard to stay at home. The boy was bombarded with nonstop noise coming from every corner of the house. On a normal day, he wouldn’t be bothered by the constant arguing between Jake and his girlfriend or the loud ass giggles coming from Sunghoon’s room. But today, all he felt was his shooting headache, and the noise surrounding him only added to his agony. He needed to get out.
The first thing that came to mind was the therapeutic library environment he had experienced while watching you cram for your seminar. Yearning for the same feeling, he found himself stuffing his keys in his jacket pocket as he decided to take a little night walk to the University’s library. The walls of windows would probably look even more stunning with the moonlight shining through.
Yes, he wanted to experience the same feeling he had the last time, but he didn’t expect to see you slumped over on the same table, sleeping soundly. Smiling to himself, the boy sat down in the seat across from you, watching as your body rose up and down slightly. In his eyes, you were constantly busy with no down time whatsoever. He had always wondered if you could get sufficient sleep every day. You rarely had nights where you would get enough rest, and Heeseung could tell. You wouldn’t be dozing off in the school’s library if you weren’t swamped with loads of work.
Maybe it was the way you gripped onto the edge of your laptop, hugging it like a pillow, but Heeseung couldn’t help but feel a need to protect you, to shield you away from all the bad in the world. The boy spent the next ten minutes staring out the window, accompanying you as you slept. Just from sitting in silence, he could feel his headache slowly creeping away.
The slight buzz of his phone startled him, shaking him from his short-lived relaxation. It was a text from Jake.
Jake: Hey sorry bro. I heard you leaving, and I figured it was because of the noise. She’s gone now, so you’re free to come back.
Just as he was about to ignore the text and return to his little moment of bliss, his phone buzzed once more.
Jake: Actually, you should come back now. There’s a fucking cockroach in the washroom and Sunghoon is busy having fun in his room. I ain’t tryna see him naked, so comeback and kill this roach.
Heeseung figured Jay had already gone to sleep and Jake was probably crouching in the bathroom, staring the roach down, watching its every move. Sunghoon was practically useless when it came to bugs. Even if he wasn’t preoccupied, he wouldn’t lift a finger to kill the bug. Sighing, Heeseung quietly stood up from his chair, trying his best not to wake you. This time he’d return the favour. Taking off his jacket, he carefully placed it over your shoulders.
As he was about to leave, his eyes landed on the same pad of sticky notes he had fidgeted with the last time he watched you study. Grabbing the pen from your unzipped pencil case, he scribbled a quick note before placing it on the top of your laptop. Heeseung wished he could stay for longer, but he knew Jake would grill him nonstop if he didn’t return to kill a small fucking bug.
Your alarm rang, the buzzing shaking you awake. Maybe taking a brief nap was a good idea because you woke up to blaring notifications from your group chat, sending you the completed work, and a small pink sticky note.
A small pink sticky note?
This wasn’t here when you fell asleep.
And neither was the black jean jacket that was carefully wrapped around your shoulders.
You're practically drooling on your laptop. What if it burns? Aren’t you proud that I didn’t wake you up? I know you would probably start scolding me for being out here at such ungodly hours, but you too??? What are you doing, sleeping in such an unsafe spot? Sorry I couldn’t stay, but I left my jacket with you since you said it gets chilly. Hopefully, this makes up for the last time. I returned the favour, but you don’t have to return the jacket. Keep it. Anyway, go to the lounge on the second floor when you wake up. There are pillows there and it’ll be much more comfortable to sleep there. Don’t go home. It’s late, and it’s unsafe to travel alone. You can head back when the sun rises, but not when it's pitch black outside, okay?
Oh also, I usually carry chocolate in my pocket (don’t ask why). There should be a Hersey’s bar in the pocket of my Jean jacket. Eat it, okay?
Heeseung had been here? Why was he out so late? Why did he come to the library?
You had many questions, but the main issue you had to deal with wasn’t the lack of answers, but the smile forming on your face as you read his note. Your heart was beating a little faster than usual, but you still sat there, oblivious to your own feelings.
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After the library incident, you bumped into Heeseung quite frequently. Every day, he’d find a way to make an appearance in your life, even if it was just sending you a playful wink as you passed each other on campus. When not surrounded by girls or his weird druggy friends, he would often strike up a conversation with you, even if you tried to push him away. He enjoyed teasing you, and somehow, it didn’t feel quite as odd as it did before.
“Your outfit is quite nice.” He commented, leaning against the column. He scanned you up and down before shooting you one of his signature smirks.
“Don’t look at me like that. I internally puke every time.” You faked a gag, waving the boy off.
“Did you think I was checking you out? Because you don’t have to worry, there’s nothing to check out.” He cackled, pushing himself off the column and towards you. “Where are you headed today? The library again?”
You hummed in response. “I have an appointment.”
Heeseung’s interest immediately piqued. “Oh right! I forgot I was talking to Miss Cupid here. Who’s your client? I’m curious.”
It was against the rules to tell him about your client, especially when he was the target. “I’m not gonna tell you. It’s confidential information.”
Usually, Heeseung would just laugh it off and leave you off to your own business, but today, he found it extremely hard not to meddle. The boy pushed you against the lockers, staring at you with his eyebrows furrowed. He somehow felt annoyed by the fact that you were going to ditch him for your client right after he got the chance to talk to you.
“H-Heeseung? What are you doing?” You gasped at the sudden impact of your back hitting the lockers. His expression had suddenly dropped, and you were left confused as to why he was so angry and why he had shoved you against some locker.
The boy only moved closer, placing his hand on the wall of lockers beside you. His breath was practically fanning your lips at this point. You squeezed your eyes shut. It was an instinct. There was something about the way he was staring at you that made you feel almost small and weak.
Heeseung was confused. Was it jealousy? Was he jealous of your stupid client that got to spend time with you? It seemed like every time he had a chance to speak to you, you would attempt to blow him off as soon as possible. Mostly, when he wanted to see you, his friends would drag him away to some party, and he’d end up getting drunk, forgetting his desire to see you as he fell deeper into intoxication. But finally he had some time to spare, without his friends up his ass and here you were, waving him off for some stupid client.
He wasn’t jealous; he was just angry that you completely disregarded his feelings — at least that’s what he told himself.
Seeing you squeeze your eyes tightly shut, he finally came to his senses, backing away before sighing. “My bad. Um, yeah, as I was saying, your outfit looks nice today. I like your barret.” He remarked dryly as he watched your eyes slowly flicker open. “I’ll get going now. Sorry about that.”
With that, heeseung left you alone, leaning against the lockers. Your heart felt as if it were a contestant for some Olympic race. Why did something so simple have your cheeks flaming? What was this feeling that caused your breath to waver and become unsteady?
Heeseung was your client’s target. You had to get that into your head. You had no right feeling this way.
Scurrying to the consulting office, you saw Yeeun fiddling with her fingers while sitting in the seat across from your designated one. She had arrived early — or instead, your little encounter had you running late. “Sorry about the wait, Yeeun!” You apologized profusely while entering the room.
“No worries, Yn!” I was really excited to see you again. “I actually wanted to ask you for a favour today.”
Placing your bag onto the wooden desk, you pulled out your chair, settling in. “A favour? Yeah, of course, what’s up?”
“Well,” Yeeun nervously grinned. “I’m attending a guest lecture today and I heard from a friend that Heeseung is coming! I just wanted to make a good impression. Do you know what I should wear?”
Your mind immediately flashed to Heeseung’s words a few minutes ago. “I like your barret.”
“Oh actually um,” you gave the girl a small reassuring smile. “I saw him in the halls today and I heard him saying he liked barrets. Maybe you could wear one?”
“I actually don’t have one. I can’t buy one either, since the lecture is in about an hour.” Yeeun sighed, wishing she owned more hats.
“You can take mine?” You suggested, taking your hat off before combing your hair through with your fingers. “You’ll look good in it and your hair is also slightly curly today! It looks good with slight curls!”
Yeeun gasped, politely accepting your offer. “Oh my, is that why your hair is always curled when you wear hats? It always looks so good!”
You giggled, motioning for her to try it on. “Yep! I spent a short while curling my hair today just for it.”
“How does it look?” Yeeun questioned, turning her head slightly from left to right after putting the hat on.
“It looks flawless! I mean, you always do, but the hat really accentuates your tall nose bridge!” You exclaimed, holding up your front phone camera for her to examine herself.
“What Yn, you’re right! It looks really good!” she squealed. “Plus, my outfit is similar to yours today, so it matches!”
“Yeah! So wear it!” You shot Yeeun another smile before going into your bag to pull out your notebook. “So since we already got you looking the part, I’ll just tell you about the new information I found out this week.”
“Sounds good!” Yeeun scooted closer to the desk, thrilled to hear about your new findings.
“Yes, so never reject a party invitation from him, okay?”
“Yes! I got it.” Yeeun gave you a small thumbs up. “But what if he doesn’t invite me to one of his parties?”
“Then casually ask him if he's holding one this week.” You grinned. “I mean, he hosts one, or at least his friend group hosts one every week at their frat house.”
“Right,” Yeeun pondered for a second before speaking again. “Is it that important to attend one of his parties?”
You didn’t know how to respond. Something in you wanted to end this whole cupid exchange quick, and you knew the best way for her to get his attention was at his stupid parties. You planned to doll Yeeun up when she officially got invited by him. These parties didn’t require invitations, but it was important to have Heeseung personally invite Yeeun. He would know she would be coming and would expect her to greet him when she arrived — that already was a benefit. “Yes, Yeeun! He needs to know you’re coming, remember?”
“Oh, right!” She exclaimed, beaming with excitement. “Then I’ll try my best to talk to him today. I’ll get going now! Thank you once again Yn, you’re a lifesaver.”
“Yeah, of course.”
Your last words left a bitter taste in your mouth. Why was your stomach churning so uncomfortably? It's almost like you hated the idea — the idea of them flirting or making out at one of his parties.
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Heeseung regretted every minute of his morning, replaying his encounter with you repeatedly like a broken cassette player, until he felt almost dizzy. He didn’t mean to come off so harshly, yet whenever he saw you, he just wanted you to remain in his view until he himself was forced to leave. He remembered the expression in your eyes and how they grew almost fearful. Somehow it made him feel as if he was in the wrong, as if he were the one to blame for your shaking legs. Initially, he was intrigued by your lack of interest and aloof attitude towards him, but now it only bothered him, crushing his dignity firmly with no sense of remorse. It was almost as if you despised his presence and would go to extreme lengths to stay clear of the boy.
But that didn’t explain the goosebumps that ran up your neck when his breath fanned your lips.
Much to his disfavor, the boy's phone buzzed continually in his back pocket. His father had been pressuring him to attend a special guest lecture to make up for his lack of efforts in his other classes. He had been dreading it for the entire week, and he knew skipping would only earn him a mouthful. Some lecture about some “intriguing discussions about the human mind, darker drives and psychological analysis.” He had no interest whatsoever, and the only thing driving him was the party at the end of the dreadful week. Slinging his bag over his shoulder, he made his way down the looping brick hall, leading him to the lecture hall with the purple plush seats. He didn’t care too much since he would probably sit near the back and doze off behind some committed student who actually attended to learn. Waving lazily to the girls who stared at him with googly eyes, he felt almost sick of doing the same thing. No longer did he find it fun to watch a random girl squirm at the fact that they were acknowledged by the school’s infamous rugby captain. Instead, he found it tiring. He had grown weary to the customs of winking at every passing person. Their excitement clearly did not phase him in the slightest anymore.
The lecture hall was rather silent, opposite of what he thought it’d be like. The only thing he was expecting was over excited students who were too passionate about the subject and enjoyed blabbing constantly about it. He expected everyone to fit the prototype he had created in his head during his tread over. Instead of conforming to his thoughts, most people were in their own seats, scrolling through their phones. Sighing, Heeseung slowly made his way up the stairs. His arrival earned a few slight gasps from a few of the younger students, but he ignored them, focusing on gaining a perfect spot for his little nap.
That was only until he saw you with your head down, buried in your arms. You were wearing the same berret. He chuckled, carefully approaching you, making sure he didn’t make a sound. Maybe this lecture wouldn’t be too bad and maybe he could apologize for what had occurred this morning.
“Hey miss cupid, didn’t know I’d find you here.” Heeseung spoke softly, giving you a soft tap on your head. “Didn’t know you were interested in dark psychology. But at the same time, I feel like it’s very fitting.” Settling his bag on the small pull out table attached to his seat, he wrapped his arm around your chair as he watched you groan slightly, lifting your head.
“Excuse me? Who’s miss cupid?” Yeeun lifted her head, only to face the last person she expected to sit next to her. “Wait, oh my… um hi! Hi Heeseung.”
Heeseung’s face dropped immediately. “Oh, I’m sorry. I thought you were someone else.” Removing his arm, he quickly shifted uncomfortably, clearing his throat in the process. How could he have mixed you up with someone who didn’t look remotely like you? It was the hat, the fucking hat. He cursed under his breath repeatedly, resting his head on his palm, attempting to distract himself from the embarrassment. He had really just sat in the most evident spot, where the professor could spot him in a single second. Maybe if his mind wasn’t flooded with thoughts of you, he’d make a rational decision and analyze the person in front of him first. Why the fuck was he so desperate?
“Oh, did you mix me up with someone?” Yeeun tapped the boy on the shoulder, shaking him out of his daze. Her smile faded when she saw the boy squint at her, shaking his head as he frowned. Did she do something? Why did he look so uninterested? Didn't Yn say that the hat might help her out?
“Yeah, I guess. Sorry, it’s my fault. I should’ve looked more carefully.” He spoke, forcing a smile to wave off the girl’s concern.
Yeeun couldn’t be happier to see the boy smile again. Her cheeks grew hot as the pair held eye contact for a few seconds. “Oh well, um,” she began. “My name is Yeeun. Hopefully next time you won’t get me mixed up with someone else.”
"Oh yeah, uh sure.”
“I’ve heard of you before,” Yeeun spoke, this time in a softer tone. “You’re the captain of the rugby team, right? I really enjoyed watching you play last year. This year I didn’t have the chance to attend any of your games because of my busy schedule, but I will for sure make time. Speaking of time, I have time this weekend but sadly there’s no game this week. I wish I had come last time. My friend went, and she said you—”
“Wow, that’s interesting, well I mean there is a party this week. I guess you could come.” Heeseung intervened, his tone lacking any sort of enthusiasm. He knew what this was. Another one of those girls trying to appeal to him; kiss up to him so they could get some special invitation from him. Or the other option; they wanted to get in his pants. There was no in-between and Heeseung was sick. How many times had he experienced the same conversation in the past four years? Previously, he might’ve flirted back, but somehow he was absolutely turned off by Yeeun’s advances.
“Oh my god, really? A personal invitation from you?” Yeeun’s expressionbrightened, along with her smile.
Heeseung shot her a forced lazily grin. “Yeah, just give me your number. I’ll text you the address and time.” She was so excited and for what? He didn’t understand how an invitation could influence someone this greatly. They had parties almost every two weeks. Had she never gone to one? Offering his phone to the girl, he sat back, watching Yeeun type in her number ecstatically, fingers slightly quivering. He already knew. She found interest in him, and he couldn’t help but feel bored at that revelation.
“I’ll be sure to come.” Yeeun giggled softly, returning Heeseung's phone. “I might bring a plus one. Is that okay?”
“Yeah, anyone is welcome. Do whatever you wish.”
And the rest of the lecture went swiftly. Heeseung could see the girl next to him steal glances at him now and then. He could see the twinkle in her eyes and how they shined when her gaze landed on him. She most definitely enjoyed his company, unlike someone he knew. But he couldn't say the same.
Upon dismissal, Heeseung didn’t spare a single glance at Yeeun before barging his way through his row, attempting to get to the doors as quickly as possible. Still left in a daze, Yeeun felt the giddy jumping in her stomach as she watched the boy’s broad shoulders squeeze through the jumbling crowd. She liked him even more now. The handsome, tall and kind Lee Heeseung, who was kind enough to invite her to his party.
Heeseung felt void of emotions. His body felt numb and his expression remained blank as he slammed the lecture door, leaving Yeeun’s sight. His surroundings were blurred out by his thoughts that swarmed and suffocated him.
Why did he feel no joy in seeing people swoon over him?
Why was this morning’s incident still stuck in his head like super glue, permanent and unremovable, that only a painful amount of scrubbing, scratching and rinsing could remove? Heeseung was unable to get his mind off you, and he didn’t have the energy to wash away his feelings when his thoughts blocked his freedom.
The realization of his feelings was something new to him.
But Heeseung feared acceptance.
His hands automatically swiped at his phone, dialing the first number on his contact list.
“1”
He needed a distraction.
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“What the fuck? Where do you need to go?” Your jaw hung wide open at your best friend, who only shot you a nervous grin as she fidgeted with her fingers.
“I’m sorry Yn, please?” Ryujin shot her puppy-like expression at you, begging for you to say yes.
“Okay, first off, why the fuck are you going to see Park Sunghoon, and second, why do I need to drive your ass there? Drive yourself!” You rolled your eyes, bringing your focus back to your dinner you had cooked for yourself.
“Okay, I Just need to give him something, but I just need you to drop me off because ‘he’ knows my car plate and I don’t want him to misunderstand the situation.” Ryujin pleaded.
You had to remind yourself that “he” was the young manager Ryujin had been seeing, who lived around the area of Sunghoon’s fraternity home. “What do you mean, misunderstand? So you want me to wait for you until you return this ‘item’ and then drive you back?”
“Precisely!” Ryujin shot you a thumbs up, which was followed by a nervous grin. “If he sees that I’m with a friend, then he won’t get suspicious.”
You squinted at the girl. “Yeah, but whatever this whole ‘returning the item shit’ is, it’s already fishy to me.”
“No, I swear it isn’t, just please get in the car. Sunghoon’s an impatient person.”
And that’s how you found yourself stepping on the siege green door mattress, neatly placed in front of Sunghoon’s fraternity house. Ryujin pressed on the doorbell once and a long stretch of silence followed through. She then proceeded to bang on the door repeatedly. Ryujin was also an impatient person. “He’s really testing my patience today, huh?” Ryujin groaned, pacing around the door in small semi-circles.
You stood beside her, bored out of your mind. You could’ve been productive in the time wasted by Ryujin, who was too scared to get “caught” returning some stupid ass item. Maybe he wasn’t home, and he pranked your best friend to come over, just to waste her time. He seemed like that type of person. Waiting in the car sounded like a better idea than waiting out here on their doorsteps in the cold. Just as you were about to turn around, the door slammed open to a disheveled—
“Heeseung?” Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion as your eyes scanned the man standing in the doorway. He leaned lazily on the open door, barely holding on to the frame of the entrance. He was wearing an oversized flannel, barely clinging onto his shoulders that hung only partially buttoned, revealing most of his bare chest. Your eyes grew big as you noticed the dark red love marks that decorated his neck, all the way to the lower half of his upper body, which was shielded by his flannel.
You were sure the marks didn’t stop there.
“Shit. Yn?” Heeseung was not expecting you. He had only come to his senses after the long pause of him opening the door. He had thought maybe Sunghoon had forgotten his keys, or maybe Jake was too drunk to even search for his. In no world did he think he’d open the door to you, standing at his doorway with an unreadable expression.
“Heeseung, what’s taking you so long?” You heard a voice emerging from behind him, her voice laced with fatigue but also a strong sense of desire.
You knew.
You knew what was going on.
“Yn, I can explain.” Heeseung rustled his already messy hair. You could clearly read his expression from the way his eyebrows arched downwards, to the firm line his lips were pressed into.
Shaking your head slightly, you squeezed your eyes shut. “What is there for you to explain?” You spoke in a stern voice, attempting to hide the quivering of your words.
“Heeseung, who is it?” You heard the honey laced voice another time.
Without any hesitation, you pushed Heeseung back into the warmth of his house before slamming the door shut. The cold air fanned your face, and the contrast stung like needles. Or maybe it was the disturbing churning in your stomach that made you feel almost sick. Maybe it wasn’t the cold that pierced your body, but the realization that hit you hard in the head, knocking you back to reality.
Why did it hurt to see him like that?
Why did you even care? What did it matter to you?
You always knew. Heeseung was the biggest player on campus, but somehow you didn't know why you expected him to differ from his reputation. You had seen him on campus with his hands around a girl’s waist before, so why did it hurt you so much to see him today?
Ryujin stood on the side, this time her mouth hanging wide open. What did she just witness? She knew her best friend, she read you like an open book, and she understood every expression and twitch in your facial expression. She had just witnessed her best friend’s heart shattering into pieces.
ENTRY LOG #3
Fuck Lee Heeseung. He isn’t kind, nor does he have any redeeming qualities. He isn’t someone to pursue if you're looking for something long-term. He’s an absolute jerk who lies through his teeth and he — it doesn’t matter. Yeeun should give up on him. He’ll just hurt her in the end.
Entry logs were supposed to be professional.
No feelings were supposed to be involved.
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You dreaded your next meeting with Yeeun. Once again, you had nothing positive to report to her. You had been labeled the most professional member of the club, yet you failed to deliver any actual substance. Maybe this was a sign to quit the club once and for all. You would have to pull out your logbook full of scribbles and curse words at your client’s love interest.
It was unprofessional of you. But the only main issue was your feelings.
Why the heck did your heart drop to the pit of your stomach when you saw Heeseung the other night? It wasn’t like you two had anything going on — you knew that for sure. But then why did his expression fall into utter fear when he saw you on his own doorstep? Why did he feel the need to explain? Wasn’t this one of his normal, frequent activities? If so, why did his eyes yearn to apologize?
Snap out of it. You had to bring yourself back to reality.
What mattered now was that Heeseung was your client’s love interest and nothing mattered more other than getting them together — even if he was a jerk. You had no responsibility for how relationships would grow and break after your service. Frankly, you got them together, and that’s all that mattered. It wasn’t your fault if they ended up breaking up, because that was something you couldn’t control.
“I’ll just do what I always do,” you mumbled, shaking your head as you watched the faint movement of the clock. “Get them together. The end. No strings attached.”
There were five more minutes until your meeting with Yeeun, but surprisingly, the knock at your door came earlier than expected. She was smiling yet again, this time holding a set of sweet frappuccinos in her hand. The girl had an insane amount of manners. She stood outside the door even if she already knew you were fine with her bargaining in. She respected your privacy and only entered when you gave her a slight nod.
“Yn, you won’t guess what happened!” Yeeun squealed, placing the two diabetes-inducing drinks on the table. “I wanted to tell you as soon as possible, but I remembered ‌ that I didn’t have your number and had no actual other way to reach you.”
There was a strict rule in the whole “cupid’s service.” The relationship between you and your client would remain professional throughout the duration of your assistance. They would have no access to any of your personal information, and neither did you. The only thing you had to keep in contact with was your weekly scheduled meetings.
“What can be so exciting? You're all giddy!” In all honesty, you never understood the girl’s positivity. It was as if she was shielded by a ray of pure golden sunshine for her entire life. Darkness was a concept that strayed away from her, never crossing paths.
“Heeseung invited me to his party!” Yeeun chirped. “It was a personal invitation, too! He asked for my number and sent me the time and address! Do you think he likes me back? I mean, he invited me personally!”
Your smile immediately turned downwards at the mention of Heeseung. You found it odd that even after all the claims about him and his flings, she wouldn't slowly lose interest and move on. Instead, the girl only saw him as a knight in shining armor, who would walk with her in that path of purity, that ray of sunshine.
But she was delusional.
Forcing the best answer you could, you awkwardly closed your log book filled with pages of slander. “Uh, oh wow Yeeun! I'm so happy for you.” What more could you say? Heeseung invited anyone who wanted to attend his parties. There was no such thing as private invitations—
Unless…
Right, you had to be positive. This was your best chance at getting them together. “You should go, a hundred percent. You said he invited you, right? So he’ll probably want to see you there! We should decide on your outfit together.”
“Right!” Yeeun giggled in agreement. “Oh but Yn, I need to request another favour.”
Already scrolling through an online store catalog, you stopped to glance back at Yeeun, who had an almost apologetic expression plastered on her face. “The tone of your voice has me worried a bit. But go ahead, what's up?”
“I’m sorry, but could you please come to the party with me? All my friends are absolutely against the idea and I don’t want to be going to an unfamiliar place alone. I thought maybe since you’ve probably never been, we could navigate it together? Also, isn’t it best to go with a friend?”
Your mind immediately flashed back to the other night, standing in front of Heeseung’s doorway. An unfamiliar place? Yeah, you wished you could agree. “Yeeun, I’m sorry but,” You had to avoid this party at all costs.
Because you wanted to keep the relationship between you and Yeeun professional? That’s only what you told yourself.
You didn’t want to see him again. You didn’t even want to lay your eyes on the boy for a second.
“I get you wanna keep everything professional, but I really need your help! Just this once, I promise! Next time, I promise I won’t bother you about something like this again! You’ve just been so helpful and I really find comfort in you. Plus, maybe you could assist me with getting Heeseung there, right?”
Maybe she had a thing for rambling.
“Yeeun, I’m honored that you find comfort in me, but this is really something I cannot do for you. I can give you tips and I could also help you find a dress, or heck, even purchase one for you, but physically attending? That’s something I can’t do.” You spoke sternly, hoping she’d get the idea.
“But who’s gonna take me home? What if he invites me to drink? I can’t say no to him, and even worse, I can’t drive back under the influence!” Her eyebrows furrowed. She was getting more desperate.
“Then I’ll give you my number. You can call me and I’ll pick you up.”
“But that’s unprofessional!” Yeeun retorted. “I’m gonna have a hard time navigating this new environment. Could you just help me? Please?”
At this point, you knew the girl wasn’t going to back out until you accepted her request. Maybe you wouldn’t even see him. You could just drop her off and stick around outside and make up some random excuse that you're carsick. Maybe it wouldn’t be that bad. “Okay fine. But this time only.”
“Fingers crossed,” She giggled, standing up from her chair. “I’ll head off now since I have other plans! But we can meet here Friday night, I’ll pick you up. Make sure to bring your drivers license though! You’ll probably be the one driving us back! Oh yeah, and this drink is for you. I was going to bribe you with it but I’m glad it didn’t resort to it.” She waved at you before pushing her way out of your office.
Wow. Did she really think a cheap drink could buy your favour?
You were slowly losing respect for her. Who knew someone this smart could be so stupid in the real world. Being book smart doesn’t define your intelligence whatsoever.
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Friday came faster than you expected and with a blink of an eye, you were sitting in the passenger seat of Yeeun’s silver Lexus that smelled as if it was brand new. They were going to a party, so why would she drive out her new car? It was a night of chaos and her perfectly painted car was a hundred percent prone to scratches, bumps and, worse off them all, vomit. Rolling down the windows, you stuck your face in the fresh air, attempting to mask the overwhelming smell of fresh leather. You dreaded this day, but somehow Yeeun didn’t seem to care one bit.
“Thank you so much for picking out a dress for me, Yn!” Yeeun broke the silence while keeping her eyes on the path ahead of her. “I’m glad we found an outfit suitable for you too! Your dress is really cute, but it doesn’t over shine mine, which is probably a good idea since I need to be the main highlight today.”
You had grown to realize that Yeeun wasn’t shy at all. She just needed time opening up and conveying her true thoughts. No wonder her works were all filled with complex feelings and a wide range of emotions. She didn’t have anywhere to convey her own, so writing them out was probably the most convenient for her. Yeeun was comfortable with you now, and that obliterated any filter she had masking her feelings. “Of course.” You awkwardly chuckled, staring back at the blurred silhouettes of landscapes passing by.
“We’re almost there,” Yeeun spoke again. “I can’t wait to see him! What do you think he’ll be wearing? Ripped jeans? A leather jacket? What do you think it is?”
“Definitely not a loose fitting flannel.” You blurted out, eyes still trained on the oddly shaped traffic light in the distance.
“Huh? A loose flannel? Why would that even come to mind?” Yeeun questioned. “Do you like when people wear oversized flannels?”
You choked, slightly coughing at her response. “No, it was just a random thought.”
A random thought?
No.
You still despised Heeseung for his flannel that told you everything. The way his face fell pale and the way he wanted to “explain.” Nothing made sense to you, and your thoughts were still tightly wrapped around that night.
Nothing made sense — not even your own feelings.
You didn’t know why you were so bothered and so angry at the boy. Every time you saw him after that night, your eyes would immediately dart away, fleeing his presence. He would attempt to run after you, but he would constantly lose your trail.
“Well, look at that. I can already hear the music and we’re only a block away.” Yeeun broke the silence once again.
“You might want to park your car around here,” you suggested. “It would be best if we walked over there instead. You wouldn’t want your car getting damaged by drunk students, would you?”
You were right, and Yeeun nodded happily. Complying with your suggestion, she pulled over, parking in front of a lawn, away from anyone’s garage lane. The housing was rather sparse in the area and none of the neighbors seemed to be bothered by the intense booming music coming from the party. Yeeun checked once again if her windows were rolled up completely before getting out of her car. Swiftly following her, you stepped out of the door from your side. You hadn’t even gone into the house, but you could already feel your soul leaving your body. You despised loud, chaotic environments — especially parties.
Yeeun scurried over to you, linking her arm with yours. “Isn’t this so exciting? Let’s find Heeseung as soon as we enter, okay?”
You squinted at her before reassuring her with a sarcastic smile. “Um, actually, I’m a little carsick. I think I’ll stay outside for a while.”
“No, you can’t do that!” She whined, shooting you an accusing pout. “At least greet him with me first. I told him I was gonna bring a plus one. You can go anywhere you want after.”
Demanding and inconsiderate. You had figured that she was just as stubborn as Heeseung.
“Fucking kind facade.” You mumbled under your breath, clearing your throat in the process.
“What?” Yeeun questioned with the same innocent eyes she had looked at you with the first time you two had met.
“Oh nothing, let’s go in.” You smiled.
Yeeun didn’t ask further questions. Blinded by her eagerness, she pulled you into the loud atmosphere littered with red plastic cups and confetti. The music was earsplitting, only making it possible to hear each other if you spoke up. “Shall we head to the main living room area? I heard he’s usually there with his friend group.” Yeeun attempted to shout over the music, covering her ears in the process. The speakers were right at the door, so maybe this was the reason the music overpowered.
You nodded hesitantly, and the girl didn’t waste a single second, dragging you further past the groups of students playing beer pong. Their drunken cheers of victory enticed you more than wherever the heck Yeeun was dragging you to.
“Oh, shit.” The shorter girl halted. “I see him.”
“Damn, do you have twenty, twenty vision or something? Because I can’t see shit.” You spoke with a lack of enthusiasm.
Yeeun turned around, facing you as she fidgeted with her fingers. “Do you see him over there? He’s surprisingly not wearing anything shockingly fashionable, but he still looks so good.” She gushed, looking down at her feet.
Once again, she reminded you. No matter how her personality took a turn, her feelings towards him were still the same — innocent and pure. She liked him a lot, and you could tell from the way her eyelashes fluttered as she spotted him.
Titling your head to the left, you looked in the direction where Yeeun was last staring. You spotted him almost immediately. He stood against a wall, one hand in his pocket and the other holding the same plastic red cup you had seen everyone with. Yeeun was right. He was dressed rather effortlessly, but he was still attractive. He wore a plain white t-shirt tucked neatly in his black straight-fit pants. His hair was styled and neatly parted, however, unlike regular days, more of his forehead was exposed today. He looked mature, unlike his daily boy-ish looks. “Well, it’s your chance. Go up to him.” You encouraged, trying your best to feel the same excitement Yeeun had felt.
“Crap, he looks so good. I don’t know if I’ll be able to say anything. What if I get tongue twisted? You’ll help me, right?” Yeeun panicked slightly, her eyes darting everywhere.
You gave the girl another reassuring nod. How many times would you have to reassure her today? “Yeah, just go up to him.”
Yeeun took a few breaths in and out, calming herself. “Okay, let me reorient myself.”
With Yeeun still facing away from Heeseung, you stole another glance at the group he was standing with. You spotted Sunghoon, the puppy looking boy and the other boy with the sharp features. You had recognized them from the rugby game, as their faces weren’t the easiest to forget. Before you could divert your attention back to the panicking Yeeun, your eyes met a familiar pair of inky dark eyes. Through his hooded lids, Heeseung looked up at you from the rim of the plastic cup he was drinking out of. He held eye contact, his gaze piercing right through you.
Instead of looking away, you stared back at him. Your surroundings seemed to disperse into nothingness as you fell deeper into his gaze that devoured all light with its intensity. You felt your stomach flip inside out as the boy kept his gaze trained on you.
How could he be so confident after that incident?
He really felt nothing, huh?
“Yn? Yn?” Yeeun was already snapping her fingers at your dazed expression. “What are you looking at? You’re making me more nervous.”
“Oh shit. I'm sorry, I didn’t mean it.” You stammered, forcing another one of your fake smiles.
Yeeun rolled her eyes. “You’re constantly zoning out today, but I’ll let it go since you’re helping me out.” Maybe the girl had felt a sudden surge of confidence because she was now holding onto your wrist, pulling you towards the group of boys. She stopped right in front of the four of them and cleared her throat, signaling for their attention. You stood behind the girl, attempting to divert your attention back to the kids playing beer pong.
“Oh? Who’s this?” The puppy looking boy spoke in an amused tone. “I’ve never seen you before. Are you new here?”
“Wow shut up bro, ask for her name first.” The boy with the sharper features stated.
You could see Yeeun fidgeting with the helm of her skirt. Heeseung wasn't even looking at the anxious girl in front of him. Instead, his eyes were glued on you, who seemed concerned about Yeeun’s nervous state.
“Oh wait,” Sunghoon pushed Yeeun slightly, moving her off to the side. He was moving towards you. “You, you’re Yn aren’t you? Ryujin’s friend.”
You lifted your gaze up to meet Sunghoon’s amused stare. Shit. Yeeun looked pissed. She had been completely disregarded by the boys, and Heeseung didn’t even seem to recognize her. “Oh yeah, hi.” You responded dryly.
“Oh wait, you’re Yn?” the puppy boy spoke again. “Heeseung mentioned you before, isn’t that right?” He nudged his friend on the shoulder, indulging in the conversation Sunghoon had established with you.
Your gaze found Heeseung once again. He didn’t speak. His face sat emotionless, void of any sort of reaction as he leaned back against the wall, sipping on his drink without responding to Jake.
“Sorry, he’s been a little out of it recently, I apologize for—"
“Doesn’t matter.” You blurted out. “Um, this is my friend Yeeun. She was invited by one of you, I’m assuming? She just wanted to say hi.” You wanted to avoid saying Heeseung’s name at all costs.
The boys looked at each other, confused. “Uh, I don’t think any of us invited her.” The boy with the sharper features spoke again, further extending his apologetic tone.
“I did.” Heeseung finally spoke up. “Well, she practically begged me to invite her. She bothered me about it for the whole lecture and she just couldn’t stop going on about how she wished she could be at my game. She kept batting her eyelashes at me as if her stupid falsies could seduce me or something. It was kind of sad, honestly. Actually, it’s embarrassing, seeing someone try so hard just to get notice—“
“What the fuck is your problem?” You viscously snapped at him. You could see Yeeun shaking slightly from the rude remarks Heeseung had thrown at her while inching close to her. He had taken someone’s genuine feelings and twisted them to sound like some obsession. You didn’t like Yeeun’s pushy attitude, but this was too much.
The other boys were stunned by your words, too scared to speak up. Yes, they had thought their friend had gone too far, but now that you spoke, there was no more room to intervene.
“What the fuck do you mean? What’s my problem?” Heeseung retorted. This time, his eyes burned with anger. He pushed his drink into Sunghoon’s grasp before pushing Yeeun to the side once again as he approached you.
“You can’t just say that about someone. Do you know how much your words can affect someone? Simply disregarding someone’s genuine feelings doesn’t make you cool. Just because you have a reputation doesn’t mean everyone fucking wants you. Stop acting so entitled because it’s gonna stab you in the back.” You hissed, ignoring how the room fell silent.
“Well, you know what? Your friend here seems to fucking want me, so your point isn’t getting through. She was practically drooling when she entered the fucking house.” Heeseung fired back.
He had already seen you two as soon as you both walked through the doors? Looking back at Yeeun, she shot you a venomous glare. You had completely ruined her chances with Heeseung, and now you were here arguing with him.
You were sick of this.
You had a feeling since day one, no one would walk out of this happy. You knew involving yourself would tangle up the situation, but you were already in too deep, trying to protect Yeeun’s image. Yet, she didn’t seem a tad thankful for your actions.
“Fuck this cupid shit.” You mumbled while scoffing. You didn’t know why Heeseung had targeted all his anger on you after he was the one who threw rude remarks at your friend. But more specifically, you didn’t know why he was so angry at you when he was the one caught in an unfortunate tango with some random girl. You remembered his apologetic eyes the first time he tried to explain. But now, all that was left was anger fuelling strongly in his heart. Maybe he just didn’t want you to tell everyone you had seen him that night and that’s why he tried to convince you with his sad eyes.
“You know what? Fuck you, all of you.” You fumed, turning around almost immediately. You didn’t want to be in this house for any second longer. Yeeun watched as you dashed out of the house, slamming the door in the process. She was pissed — pissed that you blew her chances.
“Yo, what the fuck is wrong with you today?” Sunghoon pushed the plastic cup back into Heeseung’s hand. “First you’re being irresponsive, now you’re being some actual fucking jerk. All this for what, huh? Apologize.”
Heeseung himself didn’t know what had gotten into him.
He had no reason to blow up in your face, nor did he have a reason to denounce Yeeun with such venomous remarks. He didn’t even know why he was so angry. The feeling that welled up in his stomach when he saw you enter the house with a smile on your face suffocated him. It’s not that he didn’t want to speak, he just couldn’t bring himself to.
“I need some fresh air.” Heeseung finally spoke up again, excusing himself from his confused friends, who only shouted at him to come back. Yeeun stood frozen, watching as the boy she so desired disappear into a crowd of people. He had ignored her presence first, made such negative remarks about her, and then, once again, disregarded her while leaving without a single apology. The rumors were lies. Heeseung wasn’t a swift player who swept people off their feet.
Instead, he was cruel and seemingly heartless. Yeeun’s view began to cloud and blur as tears welled up in her eyes.  
Heeseung headed straight for the door. He once again felt the sudden urge to find you, to apologize for everything that had transpired this past week. You had looked at him with such disappointment. He felt a lump forming in his throat at the thought of you hating him. As soon as he made his way outside, the cold air sent shivers down his spine. Had it always been this cold? His gaze quickly darted in every direction, until he spotted you a block away, leaning against a car with your hands covering your face. Were you crying? But his words weren’t even directed towards you.
His trudge towards you felt almost painful as his feet grew heavier with every step. At this point, you had sensed someone coming in your direction. Looking up, you made direct eye contact with Heeseung, who stood frozen in front of you. You weren’t crying. Rather, you seemed frustrated, especially now in his presence. “Why the fuck are you here?” You spat, gaze piercing through his.
Heeseung’s eyes softened, erasing his lingering anger. He didn’t have the right to get angry with you in the first place, and now that he was alone with you, he no longer wanted to keep beefing. Swallowing the lump that reformed in his throat, Heeseung finally spoke up. “I’m here to apologize. Not just for today, but the other night, too.”
“What is there to apologize for?” You retorted.
You were afraid to break down in front of Heeseung.
You couldn’t let him know how devastated you had felt after you saw him the other night. Rather, you couldn’t even give him the slightest hint that you were affected by his actions.
You were right. What was there to apologize for? It’s not like he did anything wrong. But somehow the guilt was eating away at him. He didn’t want you to misunderstand his feelings.
His feelings?
“You’re right. There’s nothing to apologize for, but everyday we grow further apart. At this point, you’re practically avoiding me like I’m some plague.” Heeseung spoke.
He had caught you. Sure, you wanted to play it off like nothing had happened. But whenever you saw the boy, you couldn’t help but feel a sharp pang in your chest. Avoiding him was your only option. “I realized that I shouldn’t get close to you, since you’re my clients—”
Shit. You weren’t supposed to tell him.
“I mean. You’re um,” you struggled to make up an excuse. “You’re bad news. That’s what everyone says.”
“I know already. You don’t have to hide it.” Heeseung mumbled. “I knew that Yeeun girl was your client right when you spoke up for her. I was her target, huh? You’re tasked to bring us together. Is that why you distanced yourself?”
“Yeah, it’s not professional to have close relations with your client’s—“
“But what if I liked you?” Heeseung intervened. “What if I couldn’t go a fucking day without you?”
You were lost for words, and time seemed to stop at his sudden confession. What the heck did he just say?
“Yn, I don’t care for your fucking client or your stupid cupid services. I don’t care about professionalism, nor do I care about hurting Yeeun’s feelings. Every single time you avoided me or ignored me, I felt as if I was sinking deeper into a pit of lava. It fucking hurts. Do you know that? To see your expression drop into a cold hard stare as soon as we made eye contact.”
“Then why the fuck did you sleep with that girl if you liked me so much?!” You finally lashed out, demanding an answer.
His eyes widened, shocked by your words. Of course, he wanted to explain himself, but he didn’t expect you to blatantly ask him out of the blue. “That,” he hesitated. “I didn’t know how to handle my feelings. I don’t usually feel such a strong attachment to people, and I wanted to deny every last hint of my true feelings. I thought that maybe… I thought by getting with someone else, I’d forget about how I felt about you. But it was the complete opposite. The more I indulged in my old habits to erase you from my thoughts, the more empty I felt. The worst was the other night when you came knocking on my door. I couldn’t even process the situation. My mind just fell blank. I knew I wouldn’t be able to apologize without telling you everything. Yn I’m sorry. You probably don’t even fucking care, sorry for—“
“It hurt like shit. Did you know that?” This time, you were the one to cut him off. “You could’ve told me earlier.”
“But you were the one avoiding me.” Heeseung spoke with an innocent expression on his face.
He was right. You would never listen to his reasoning unless you came to terms with your own feelings. You would continue to ignore him until he got tired of trying.
You giggled softly. “You’re right. That was ridiculous for me to say.”
Heeseung’s frown finally curved up into a genuine smile, an unfamiliar sight. You were so used to his cocky grins and his sly smirks, you couldn’t help but admire the way the corner of his lips lifted ‌so effortlessly. “You’re finally smiling again. I missed it. I missed you.”
You stared at the boy, this time falling victim to his piercing gaze once again. You stood there frozen, unable to move, as Heeseung stared back at you with his inky eyes that appeared golden under the streetlight.
The both of you fell into the comfort of silence.
Falling deeper in his eyes, you barely noticed him inching closer to you, his breath fanning your lips. Not being able to process anything completely, you managed to hold your breath, squeezing your eyes shut at the proximity and the boy's staggering breath.
He was nervous.
He had never been nervous, but as he slowly leaned in, he could hear his own heartbeat ringing in his ears. You stood still, gripping onto the helm of your skirt as if you were holding on for dear life. Too scared to move, you didn’t know what to expect. But most importantly, you couldn’t even process what was transpiring between you two.
Was this wrong?
What were you doing?
Before your mind could wander into deeper analysis or questioning, you feel his soft lips press against yours. His movements were gentle, almost as if he could hurt you at any moment. His arms encase you as they both rest on the car behind you. Heeseung was afraid to hold you. In his eyes, you were as delicate as a feather, and just one touch would break you. He saw you as someone precious, non-deserving of his filthy hands.
Who even gave him the right to kiss you?
You, on the other hand, were lost in your own world as your mind swarmed and your heart raced. You liked Heeseung. You truly did. Your hands slowly crept away from your side, wanting to pull him closer to deepen the kiss, but before you could, he swiftly pulled away. His breaths remained unsteady as he saw your flushed face. “Shit, I’m sorry Yn. That was all of a sudden, I know.” He mumbled as his ears burned.
“Don’t apologize.” You blushed, reaching for his hand that fell to his side. Your pinky latched onto his pinky finger as you nervously looked down, avoiding his gaze.
“Does this count as you accepting my apology, then?” Heeseung spoke in an almost whispering tone.
Finally, looking up at the boy again, you gave him a reassuring smile as you hummed in response. Heeseung couldn’t help but smile like a fool, knowing you had felt the same about him.
You had accepted his apology and you didn’t push him away when he kissed you. Heeseung couldn’t be happier. What else could happen to steal his happiness away? Nothing else mattered anymore.
“Heeseung, where the fuck are you?” A voice echoed through the street. It was Sunghoon. He had come looking for his friend.
“Oh shit. I think I have to go.” Heeseung shot you an apologetic expression. “I’m so sorry Yn, I’ll see you on monday?”
You nodded, giving him another smile.
His hands left the comfort of yours as he turned away, heading back to the house.
Your pinkies were now detached from each other.
A promise would be broken.
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The next weekend you spent, curdled up in your room, replaying your encounter in your head. What the heck had transpired? Heeseung had kissed you. And you did nothing to stop him. You buried your face in your palms as you blushed again. You felt as if you were on cloud nine. What could go wrong?
Maybe you had gotten ahead of yourself.
Your phone buzzed, shaking you out of your endless thought loop.
Yeeun: Yn. I don’t know what the heck happened that day and I don’t understand why you felt the need to speak up for me. If he was gonna slander me, then so be it. You failed. You fucking failed bringing us together, and you left me that night, alone. How can you even make up for all this? How could you do this? Where’s your fucking professionalism, huh? What are you gonna do now, huh?
You froze at Yeeun’s text. Part of you wanted to blame her for having no self-worth whatsoever. But in another sense, she was right. You were the sole reason she wasn’t able to get with who she wanted. You involved your own feelings into the mix, completely throwing everything off course. It was your fault for diverting Heeseung’s attention, and you knew you were wrong. It was stated clearly in the rules: you could never have personal relations with your client, or your client’s love interest — you had broken them both.
You let your emotions get the best of you when you intervened in the conversation, attempting to protect Yeeun, and most importantly, you had kissed Heeseung, completely enveloped in your own feelings. Your first mistake was accepting Yeeun’s invite to the party.
No. Your first mistake was getting involved with Lee Heeseung.
Your phone buzzed again.
Yeeun: Also, I hope you don’t think I’m dumb. I saw you. I saw you with him. I can’t believe you could do this to me — and you still preach professionalism? Cut the bullshit, Yn. You completely deceived me, and unless you want to deal with getting kicked out, I suggest you do something.
You didn’t care if you got kicked out, frankly it would probably be for the best if this would be the outcome of your requests. However, the main issue was your own guilt, that was picking away at you. You had lied and pretended to help someone. You had acted selfishly, only caring for your own emotions. The sole purpose of the Cupid consulting club was to prioritize your client’s feelings and help them in your best effort. You did none of that. You didn’t prioritize Yeeun, nor did you truly help her.
You shrunk back into your chair, contemplating what to do.
Yeeun was right.
You had to do something.
——
Heeseung was left confused once again. The boy was thrilled to see you after the weekend and it was all he could think about. His friends had also found his attitude weird, as they saw him randomly chuckle out of the blue. They didn’t ask questions, but they were happy he was finally out of his slump.
So why did he see you avoid his gaze once again, scurrying off to get away from him? He shook it off, thinking you were still nervous from the party incident, but as days flew by, you once again avoided him like he was some sick disease. What had he done so wrong now? He needed an answer.
He would not let you go so easily again.
“Yn.” You heard a shout from behind you. His familiar voice echoed through the empty hall, and as soon as you heard him, you wanted to dash for your life. “Can you just fucking stop? Why are you running?” The voice spoke again.
You knew if you turned around, your heart would shatter.
Right. This was for the best. You had to compose yourself.
“Yn what the fuck?” Heeseung garbled your wrist, turning you around to face him. “Why are you ignoring me again? After everything?”
You met his saddened eyes, filled to the brim with unexplainable emotions. You couldn’t bear seeing him like this, but his grip on your wrist only seemed to tighten as you attempted to wiggle out. “Let go of me.” You spat.
“What the fuck, Yn? You can’t just expect me to leave when you’re acting like this. I thought we talked this over already? Why are you acting like this, avoiding me?”
You sighed. Pushing your emotions back into your churning stomach. You hated this. You wanted to disappear.
“Stay away from me. I don’t care what you thought happened that day, but nothing did. Think of it as a mistake.” You blurted out. “No, actually, you’re Lee Heeseung, so think of it as your average fling.”
His face fell pale, all the emotions drained out by your words. “What did you just say?” He stammered.
“Do I have to make it any clearer?” You spoke again, this time struggling to keep your voice steady. “That day meant nothing to me.”
Heeseung felt as if he had been punched relentlessly in the stomach. He had poured out all his emotions to you and for the first time; he felt comfortable and content with someone. But now you were standing in front of him, each word piercing him slowly but deeply. You gave the boy a taste of his own medicine unknowingly, and all he could do was beg you to stay. “Yn, you don’t mean it.”
The more the conversation dragged on, the more you felt yourself waver in your emotions.
You wanted to drop this act, but you knew what had to be done.
“I do. You meant nothing to me. All your actions made me laugh. How could you fall for someone just because they didn’t show interest in you at the beginning? You’re truly pathetic.”
That was a lie and your words continued to thrust him deeper into agony. Sure, Heeseung enjoyed the chase, but he would drop anyone without batting an eye if they weren’t showing any interest. He thought he would feel the same about you, but his feelings proved him wrong. “If this is all an act for your stupid client, drop it. I told you already that I don’t care about your client, and if this is for her, I won’t accept it.”
He had caught you red-handed, but there was no turning back.
“No, I fucking despise you. Everything about you pisses me off to the core, especially your habits. Your habits are absolutely disgusting” At this point, you now involved your own insecurities into this. You hated his sweet words because at the back of your head you feared he was lying and you hated his habits, mainly because you were afraid he would never be truly content with you.
But none of that mattered.
Because you were never supposed to involve your own emotions in the first place.
Heeseung grabbed your shoulders, pulling you close to him. His grip tightened, breathing in slowly as he pressed his eyes shut in frustration. “Yn, fucking look at me in the eyes and tell me that there was nothing between us. Look into my eyes and tell me everything was a lie.” His voice wavered, cracking at the end of his sentence.
You took the last bit of courage you had and looked up at the boy, whose eyes were now begging you to tell him that it wasn’t a lie. “Did you not hear me the first time?” You spoke in the steadiest voice you could muster up. “You meant absolutely nothing to me, and you never will. In my heart, you amount to nothing.”
His grip on your shoulders loosened as they fell to his side in pure terror. Backing away, his hands began to quiver and his breaths grew unsteady. Never in his life did he ever think he’d experience the absolute horror of a heartbreak. He had cruised through his life, breaking hearts left and right, but never did he think he’d find himself on the verge of breaking down.
“Heeseung, it’s over. Whatever exchange we had, ends here. Don’t approach me or even look in my direction ever again.”
And that’s all it took.
That’s all it took to break Lee Heeseung, the boy who grew up engulfed by praises — the “careless” jerk, who was immune to tears and deemed “unbreakable.”
That’s all it took.
“Yn,” He croaked out, his voice still wavering. “Even if you shoved me deep into the pits of hell, I would still crawl back to you. Even if my legs were severed, I’d still claw my way back to you. Don’t you understand?” He paused.
“I fucking love you.”
Your heart fell to the pit of your stomach. You understood. You wanted to embrace him, to apologize, and to comfort him.
But you knew.
Cupid’s law number one: Never fall in love.
You were a matchmaker. You had no place involving your own emotions.
You were a matchmaker with the sole purpose of bringing others together.
But you ruined it.
You ruined it for everyone.
You had to swallow that bitter pill and acknowledge your wrongdoings. You had to come face to face with it all, and accept that you had failed.
You had fallen in love.
And in the process, you broke people for the sake of your own happiness.
There was a reason why rules were set, and you never knew the severity of following them until now.
You let your emotions get the best of you, and that’s where it all spiraled downwards.
You didn’t have the right to love; you were undeserving of it.
And if it meant breaking Heeseung’s heart to make up for your wrongdoings, you would gladly do so, no matter how badly it hurt.
For the sake of others.
You had to let go.
“I’m sorry.”
———————————————————————————————————
A/N: oml hi bff! You’ve made it through this word vomit. Hello, but I’m so honored that you even survived till the end. Editing this, plus blr acting up took like 5 hours I wanna cry. But anyways, thank you so much for reading! This is my first official one-shot, so feel free to leave your feedback and thoughts! I would love to read all of them. But again, thank you so much for reading ilyyy
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Do not copy or steal!
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deathmetalunicorn1 · 4 months
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Happy new year! Hope you had a good time! Here���s a cute idea for toddler! -adult Reader,the family finds out reader has a crush, the boy like any other toddler does the whole “cooties” thing and does his own thing. This doesn’t stop reader and she blows him a kiss while leaving kindergarten annoying the boy. The whole family thinks it won’t last long but they grow up together and end up getting married and have a child
(reader is smug as hell when she managed to make the boy whipped for them and boasts to her family about achieving a real life slow burn. Aphrodite taught her well)
-Oh, gods no- he couldn’t believe it- he didn’t want to believe it! Watching you, his precious little angel, the light of his life, blowing a kiss to a boy in your class, bidding him goodbye with a bright smile while the boy looked repulsed by your actions.
-You held the hand of (Favorite) who was the one picking you up from school today, as he had turned pure white, turning into a shell of himself from shock.
-When you arrived home you greeted everyone with a huge smile, beaming as they returned it before they noticed (Favorite) there, looking lost and defeated.
-You went to Eve in the kitchen, who had your after-school snack waiting for you, thanking her and she sat with you, talking about your day.
-A deep rumbling was heard in the living room, where everyone else was, you looked around, confused as to what was going on before Brunnhilde walked in, amused, “Y/N- is there a boy at school you have a crush on?”
-You looked proud of yourself, your little fists on your hips, “I do- B/N is really nice to me and teaches me about dinosaurs! But he doesn’t like sitting to close- says I have cooties.” The two women were instantly laughing, thinking it was hysterical, while the men in the other room were planning several different ways to deal with B/N if he were to ever hurt you.
-Your family watched you, year by year, blossoming into a beautiful young lady, but they also watched your love for B/N grow- every dance you went with him, you cheered him on at his rugby games, despite not dating.
-B/N was a fighter, not wanting anything to do with girls, but when you finally started leaving him alone, he was the one who came after you, asking you to come to his games.
-He was your date for prom and after the biggest dance of high school, he finally asked you out- which was surprising to all of your friends and classmates, who had believed the two of you had been dating for years now.
-Watching you go out on actual dates, not just friend-dates, as you had been calling them, your family couldn’t help but… follow you, as they wanted to make sure that you were safe. It was rather comical, seeing you and B/N passing by, then a large group of people, badly disguised, following from a distance.
-When you brought B/N over to meet your family officially, all of them and not just a few here and a few there- B/N was a little intimidated, seeing so many people, but he was quick to win a few of them over, smiling at you, “You have so much love, Y/N.” which made you beam brightly at him.
-Your wedding was rather eventful, as there were some of your family members trying to convince you to run away and others were trying to convince him to run (chase him off).
-When you walked down the aisle, your family was elated, cheering loudly for you which made you smile, while B/N was stunned stiff, staring with huge wide eyes which made you grin.
-The wedding was lovely as well as the reception, but you put Brunnhilde on guard duty- not letting certain people get to say speeches unless you were right there with them, as you knew better.
-When you got a turn, you looked so smug, looking at B/N, “I remember when I first told you that I liked you, you said I had cooties and you ran off, saying you would never be with me. I win!”
-The reception hall filled with laughter, including B/N’s who knew that you were right before you thanked your family and your friends, thanking them for being there for you and B/N.
-You then lifted your glass to one last person, “Lastly, I would like to thank Aphrodite- you were right, a slow burn romance tastes so much sweeter!”
-Cheers went around the room as Aphrodite looked smug herself, enjoying the shoutout before you led everyone in a toast.
-A month later, you were pouting in your family home, being doted on by Shiva’s wives and Eve, after you and B/N came by to tell them that you were pregnant. You were pouting because the men all chase B/N down the street, throwing threats at him for touching you in such a way.
-Looks like it was only going to get more wild from here!
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luveline · 6 months
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Hi! I was hoping you’d write a James or Remus fic, literally anything you want just make it super fluffy, thanks!
modern au, fem
"You have training in half an hour. What are you doing?" 
James looks up from his games console with a frown. "What?" 
"You have rugby training in half an hour, Jamie. You haven't had lunch or anything." You frown as he goes back to his game. "James, this is terrible time-keeping." 
"Sorry, I can't pause it! It's that thing. Just– fuck, two seconds my lovely beautiful darli– fuck me!" 
Curious, you creep around the bedroom to the side of the bed where he's sitting with a hunched back. "Oh. I never should've let you try. I've turned my gym mad boyfriend into a degenerate." 
You honestly believe that James should spend his time doing what makes him happiest (so long as he spends time with you, too), and for him that's rugby and weight training. They're not solely independent from one another, but they also don't always coincide, and so he spends a large majority of his time up and active. You spend some of that time active but more of it on different hobbies, including the games console. "How long have you been playing?" you ask, leaning down to stroke the thick wave of his hair from his forehead. 
"Just an hour while you were, uhm. What were you doing?" 
You kiss his forehead. "Meditating."
He laughs. "Wait, were you actually? I want to meditate with you." 
"I was doing the washing. Basically meditation if you try hard enough." He splats someone on the game, then a second person, a third in quick succession. "Are you better than me?" 
"No way, shortcake." He splats a fourth person with impressive dexterity, narrowly avoiding his own death. "I'm trying to get coins for you so you can buy that thing you want." 
James is better at the game than you, because of course he is. "I hate boys," you say decisively, kissing his forehead again. "Finish the game and get dressed, my love. I'll make you a roll to eat on the way." 
You steal a last fond kiss and he shouts sweet everythings down the stairs at you. "If my hands weren't busy!" he promises. 
You make him a sandwich and another to eat after practice and put them in a tupperware, knowing he'll scarf both in the car. It's fine, you'll just make him a third when he gets home. Time ticks on, training starts in twenty minutes, then ten. You hear the telltale sound of your avatar upstairs dying and snort to yourself. 
"James Potter!" you shout from the bottom of the stairs. "I need help!" 
There's a sudden thump and the tell-tale rush of him opening your bedroom door. "What?" he asks, coming down the stairs in a whirlwind. "What, lovely?" 
You pass him his kit and tupperware. "You're about to be late." 
"What a devious thing to do," he murmurs with a squint, though he gives you an appreciative sideways hug. "What would I do without you?"
"You'd probably have more muscles," you say. 
He kisses the soft skin under your eye as though this is the normal place for a kiss. "I think you're right. I got you enough for that thing, by the way. What was it? An aerospray?" 
He presses another kiss into the first.
You laugh and push him out the door before he gets too informed. 
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sentientcave · 4 months
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Hey friends! I'm Charlie (They/He/Sometimes She) and sometimes I write things! Here are a few of those things.
~Master List~
Two Graves - Phillip Graves is haunted by the memory of his older brother
Fuck-ass Mohawk - Johnny likes it when you're mean to him (And Ghost does too)
And They Were Roommates
Fem!Soap x Fem Reader - You're looking for a roommate, and Jaime Mactavish figures she's the right woman for the job.
Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3
Heavy Weighs the Crown
Fantasy AU - A princess in self-imposed exile is forced to come home to face the man who took her father's crown and the life she left behind. 141 x Reader.
Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3
Retirement Party
Price has retired from Military life, and he's not handling the change well. But on the one year anniversary of him hanging it up, his boys bring him something special to help keep him busy. You. (Dark fic! Read the content warnings)
Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4
Sparrowverse
Fics in an extended original character universe. I'll get around to posting Sparrow one of these days.
Cherry Bomb - Nikolai meets one of his Aunt's old school friends and tries not to fall in love.
You Drive Me Wild - Nikolai and Helena meet again three years later
WIP WEDNESDAY BAYBEE
Snippets and previews of things in the works
Rugby - Rugby Again - More Rugby - The Righteous Hand - Impound - More Impound - Sparrow - TNT
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boiledbirdy · 1 year
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BRAD FUCKIN WAYNEEE
headcannons i have abt this sweet himbo fratboy
This man is the largest in the family, like 6’6 and built like a non-green hulk. He can easily pick up and fireman carry Bruce and Jason
Is the guy in a frat party to sit with girls and hear about them bitch about periods and now carries a little pack with him everywhere that has a few tampons, pads, hand-warmers (for on the go heating pads), and Tylenol and Advil
Where does he keep this stuff and the random assortment of weird things he has, you ask? He wears a fanny-pack
read it and weep y’all he wears fanny-packs, usually the cool way over his shoulder, but mostly around his waist since he carries a backpack almost 25/8
He drives a beater truck (just an old car whose been through like three accidents and is still going strong) specifically a 1991 dodge D250 truck with a scratched up white paint job where there are dents, scratches, and a few patches of off white paint on dents that was sorta DIY-ed
his keys 🔑 have a weird ass mesh of keychains on it like: Ally flag keychain and a flag keychain for every single label a person has come out to him with, also a keychain from every museum, tourist spot he’s ever been, also a beer and bottle opener he’s a frat boy duhhh, he has a little bracelet that is made of sparkles and purple beads that steph gave to him but it was too small so he put it on his keys, a collage logo keychain, a keychain from his local gym and one with rugby on it etc
the keychains and keys are never ending
HE PLAYS RUGBY, argue with the wall.
getting a bachelors and masters in sports medicine
he makes sure to give Duke, Damian, Cass, Steph, and Tim copies of his keys first (the rest of the fam too they just get priority)
A) because they are the kids, and he wants them to know that he has an open bed any time
B) cause he’s the sibling to not get mad if they are intoxicated in any form and will cover for them
This next one is so important to me
He takes Tim to his first midnight showing of the Rocky Horror Picture Show, same with Damian
He pretty much eats at the Wayne mansion every night but sleeps at his apartment
Shows Damian some good rock’n roll ex Red Hot Chili Peppers, Sublime, Ramones, The Clash, Oingo Boingo, Ghost, Blonde, Foo-Fighters (i can make a playlist if wanted)
Just will sit and have a beer with Jason and sit in silence or talk about weird things that happened today
Steph and him have study sessions together
He will watch any ballet practice Cass wants him to see and he never misses a competition or performance
he sends Tim stupid skateboard tricks and fails videos (tiktok or insta reels) daily and then once a month they take Brad’s truck to a park and Brad sits on a ramp and cheers Tim on like its the Super Bowl
Watches Dick’s dog when he’s away from home and they both watch Barbie movies together
He gardens at Alfred’s request, yes he sucks but this man cannot not say no to the tidbits of Alfred’s life story he learns
Can kick back like 4 kegs of beer with no fucking consequences, he has a liver of steel thanks to Brucie Wayne
He’a the high guy in the bathtub at frat-parties and will give shitty or good life advice its 50/50 honestly
Does stupid white people fraternity things that would kill a normal person but he just is quirkily busting it down and Death just cannot vibe with him
makes (and i cannot stress this enough) the best and i mean best, (Alfred and Ma Kent can’t win in this one) brownies. Whether they are edibles or not they are the best.
has done the Tide-Pod challenge and survived
He is the Frat God of Gotham
Him and Duke are like the best duo
They blast Rock and Rap so that all five cars in every direction can hear it
Duke has the habit of putting weird ass bumper stickers on Brad’s desk and bed frame (at his apartment, they Do Not fuck with Alfred) Brad smiles fondly every time he finds a new one
Brad = Mark, ya know the tiktok sound
Him and Harper simp over women 🙏 together
In his fanny-pack, truck, and various rooms he has stim toys/do-hickeys bins or sections
bc he has Nerodivergent siblings and he was just trying
he asked kinda rude blunt questions, he didn’t know anything and he kinda (really) sucks at subtlety and reading a room but he was just trying to understand
He will take Damian to amusement parks and zoos pretty much bi-weekly
The girls can put on a horrible outfit and makeup and he will think he looks fabulous and no one will ever tell him that he’s sporting fashion and makeup crimes
has a small hidden bookcase of Wings of Fire, Warrior cats, Land of Stories, etc.. cause Damian is embarrassed to admit he actually likes reading them
Watches the trashiest brain rotting tv shows like Dance moms or keeping up with the Kardashians
Goes to any march or parade his siblings or friends are going to so: A) he can be that decked out ally tank of a man passing out water bottles and granola bars B) so if the police are back on their BS he can protecc atacc and throw that tear gas bacc
*Sniff 🤧* I have something I need all of you to know, I say this with a heavy heart *holding back tears 😥* Brad is a former highlighter kid— *single tear falls*
This fucking himbo stud-muffin has slept with, kissed, crushed on, and went on dates with men, but still doesn’t realize that he’s Bisexual
his favorite flavor ice cream is pistachio and carmel
KNOWS NOTHING and i mean nothing about zodiac signs
Has been caught in the middle of Gotham Rouge and does not understand what the fuck is happening
He either Teddy Bear fratboy golden retriever energies them to friendship or friendly acquaintance or annoys them to the high hells of mosquito bites on your butt
^I can expand if wanted
His phone you ask?
Screen cracked like rice crispys
apps more disorganized than the random shit drawer in someone’s house
he has a model 6S and will not upgrade or replace it to save his life.
he has an otterbox case and we all know it, no more denial
Okay thats my time yall see ya
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