#the ones that looked brighter are the ones I've used in my tumblr posts about TDJ rewatch last year. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

brinconvenient · 10 months

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This is a long tale, but I appreciate you taking the time to meet my friend Chris and help her out if you can.

TL;DR: my friend, an elderly queer woman I met when she was homeless just lost everything she owns in a fire at her first permanent home she had after becoming unhoused. Luckily, she and her cat were not home at the time. Please help if you can by donating or boosting.

This is a queer elder who needs our help. I'm hoping tumblr can come through for her

https://www.gofundme.com/f/fire-took-chris-baileys-home-they-need-help

Here's the long tale:

A friend of mine just lost everything except herself, her cat and the clothes on her back to a fire at her apartment (her first after being homeless for years) on Friday. We learned yesterday that nothing from her apartment is recoverable. Please help!

(Long post with cute cat pictures behind the readmore)

I met Chris one Sunday afternoon after driving past her three times as she sat on a bench outside our local library after closing. I stopped to ask if she needed a ride, and found out that she was homeless, staying in motels when her SSI came in and on the street when it ran out.

As the years have passed, I've learned a lot about her. Despite her parents kicking her out at 17 when she was outed to them as gay, she went back to school and became a social worker, working in several Chicago hospitals through the 80s and 90s, and, like a lot of queer women in the caring fields at that time, tended to and provided comfort and care for (among others) so many gay men, young and old, living with and dying from AIDS, from the earliest days of the disease through the availability of the triple cocktail and to the brighter days of hope.

Through it all, she had relationships with women in a time where that was something that wasn't always safe to do. Some were good, some bad, and some resulting in her losing nearly everything, but she struggled through. She quit social work in 99 or 2000 when her mom got sick and passed away, and then stayed out of the workforce to care for her dad until he passed in 2006. Those experiences impacted her deeply, and she became permanently disabled during that period, leaving her living on SSI, and struggling with her own mental health. She eventually lost her condo, and bounced in and out of apartments and motels.

When I met her in Sept 2019, I helped her get back into the motel she'd been staying at and bridging her to her next check and then making sure that she could stay there, and reliably get her maintenance meds and start rebuilding her life and credit.

This is her and everything she owned as we left her hotel room for the final time on Valentine's Day 2022.

The cat there is Bailey, her constant companion since they adopted each other in September 2021. They've both been through a lot and are absolutely the picture of "Who rescued whom?"

We started having biweekly dinners and I worked with her creditors and tried to get her credit score back into a good place, and helped her get banked and fixed up with access to the Internet and just help her feel more solid and stable in her life.

Just over 2 years later, in February 2022, we were finally able to get her into a senior independent living apartment, her first permanent home since about 2017. She had no furniture, but with some secondhand pickups and occasional pickups, we got her something resembling a home.

It wasn't perfect, and she had her grumbles, certainly, but it was her home. It was a place that she could launch from to recover and consider moving some place even better, if she chose.

However, Friday, July 14, Bailey had an afternoon vet appointment. Everything was fine when we left, but when we got home, with Bailey in a carrier in the backseat, we were shocked to see what looked like a million emergency vehicles & a whole lot of seniors sitting on the grass.

Chris and Bailey came with me to take my daughter into the city that evening, giving the situation 2 hours to develop and for us to get more information. We heard a few newsradio updates and saw this story on abc7, getting the sinking feeling that that balcony looked too familiar.

When we got back from the city, we were able to drive around the back of the building and confirm that this was her apartment.

We were able to get back to the building on Tuesday and get into the apartment to get her medications, but everything is water damaged from the sprinkler system (with all of its stagnant water) and the firehoses. All her furniture. All her clothes. Her bed. Her degrees. Gone.

Everything she owned is gone. She literally owns less now than when she was homeless. She's despairing and trying her best to keep it together, but she's lost so many homes in her life, going back to when she was 17 and her parents found out she is gay and kicked her out.

This all feels like too much. Please help. Please donate what you can, and share where you're able.

https://www.gofundme.com/f/fire-took-chris-baileys-home-they-need-help

#queer #queer elder #lesbian #lgbtqia #fire #schaumburg #apartment #lgbtqia+#unhoused #homeless #Please help #crowfund

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roxtron · 2 months

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Day 5: Rabbit, Reclaim

AGJGDFJF FINALLY IT'S DAY 5 SO I CAN POST THIS

For some reason everytime i draw him he looks so young because i'm accidentally overcorrecting since i'm used to drawing older characters. So unfortunately he looks way younger than i meant him to lol, whoops.

But wait there's more- AHAHAHA

While I did initially plan this for GGY week I eventually got the idea to use this as an excuse to draw other GGY designs, soo..

(Not sure why tumblr formatted it that way with 1 of them big but it doesn't matter lol)

I've been wanting to do this for a while, I put the tags of each person next to their design but ofc I'm still gonna tag them in the post itself so you can see their art for yourself if you haven't already. But I enjoyed each of these in their own ways so if you don't mind I think I'm gonna type a bit of text next to them..

@chipistrate This was one of the first I drew out of these, the design was pretty fun to draw but sorry if I messed up a few details, it was a bit difficult lol. The mask and goggles are really fun to draw and they make for a cool design, along with all the glowing blue. (and yes, I tried to subtly include the heelies lol)

@lunzi0 This was the first fursuit one I did lol. I adore the little stars in the design, they personalize it so well and make it really unique. I wanna try this design again since I feel like the other ones show my improvement a bit better, but I hope you can appreciate the effort I put in on my first attempt <3

@carouselrabbit This one was really fun to draw, I absolutely love the eye shape/lashes, it stands out and I always love drawing eyes with a bit of eyeliner lol, the daycare theme legwarmers is a cool nod to the balloon boy arcade machine being connected to them, and was just a fun addition in general lol, I like the style of legwarmers what can I say, fnaf changed my fashion sense a bit. also the subtle paraells to freddy's design is a nice way to connect a bit to gregory himself.

@puhpandas I can't remember if I talked about this design last time I drew it but, overall I'm really happy with how this came out, it's such an indicator of improvement since I started drawing this and I'm glad I was able to draw it better than last time lol. All the patchwork and similarities to Vanny's suit work really well, and the rabbit you chose to base it off of was a good fit, the colors make it a bit more difficult to shade for but i like detail lol, hope you like it too :)

@dykevanny I knew I wanted to do this since I started but I wasn't sure if I'd have time, and I'm glad I did! I hope you don't mind I combined aspects from the first design I saw and the second one you replied to my ask with, I liked the big purple sleeves lol. (I just realized after doing all the shading I forgot to include the oil splatter on his jacket, sorry!) It was definitely a bit difficult due to the head shape being so different but.. fluffy. i love drawing fluff. And the glowing swirl on the goggles, the shape of the ears, I love a lot about this design. :D

I have a hard time with writing compliments but I wanted to get some of those thoughts out, some of the things I like about these designs apply to multiple lol. I adore every one of these designs but I find it hard to put into words what I enjoy about them, hope the original creators are happy with these. <3

I also kept the ggys without as much lighting effects on a separate file, I felt like I should add them since they're a bit brighter lol, makes them look different.

Okay now that I've gotten all that- Sorry this post is so long! I didn't think it'd end up taking up so much space lol. Buut.. working on this drawing and thinking about it and potential context behind it gave me an au idea for it, but I'll put it under the cut since I understand most people probably won't care and just wanna see the drawings lol.

Idk if I'm confident enough to write for it but I'll give a bit of a summary.. I'll keep it under the cut for people who aren't interested and just wanna see the art though lol.

After the main events of SB and Ruin, now that the mimic's been set free, Cassie's taken control of by what's left of Vanny, using her as a new host. But with Cassie being the only human left alive down there, after being reawakened, Dr. Rabbit has nowhere left to go but back to his old host.

Vanessa, Freddy, and Gregory hadn't gone back to the Pizzaplex after ruin, but they were trying to figure out a plan to get Cassie back safely. One night after Freddy and Gregory disappear, Vanessa leaves to go find them. As dangerous as the pizzaplex is, it's her best guess for where they might've gone. She doesn't want to think about what could've happened to them, in denial for the worst case scenario. She tries to keep herself calm by telling herself they probably just left to go back for Cassie, maybe they didn't want her stopping them.. but deep down she knows it can't be that simple. She knows something's off, even if she's not ready to admit it.

When returning to the pizzaplex, she brought along her own V.A.N.N.I. mask, though unlike the one Cassie used, it was clear of the mimic's influence. After all, she was going to need some way to travel through potential blocked routes.

By the time she found Gregory, she'd still been wearing the mask, seeing him down the end of a dark hallway. He looked confused, afraid, his mind was a wreck of conflicting emotions. She started rushing towards him, happy to see him okay, until he finally spoke.

"You need to get out of here."

She stepped back, taking off the mask, only to be faced with the worst case scenario.

It was a wreck, covered in stains and tears, but it was still recognizable. He was wearing that old suit again.

As he waved, she could see Freddy's claws peeking out from the doorway, as the two stepped closer towards her.

So, she did what he told her to do, and started running. She could hear a faint voice coming from the mask, and put it back on before finding somewhere she could hide.

It was his voice again, telling her which way to go.

I guess that was the dramatic way to summarize the main idea behind it, lol. Basically Gregory and Dr. Rabbit work the way Sun and Moon work in Ruin, whichever one is in control in the real world, the other is left behind in the AR world. Or at least that's my interpretation of how they worked, considering Sun was always in mask-on scenes and moon was mask-off. I'm not too sure where the plot might go from there, and maybe I'll consider writing for it, I dunno. I've never wrote fanfic before because I get deadly afraid of writing them out of character lol, but maybe?? I have ideas for scenes and premise and stuff but I don't know if I have the confidence to write it.

But anyway! That was just more of a fun side-idea I came up with while working on this, if you read this far thanks, hope you enjoyed :)

here's some silly little lineless doodles as a reward for making it to the end hehe

now that's what I call an art dump

@ggyweek2024

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theaveragepsychoticbitch · 4 months

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Idk if the formatting will stay corrupted when I post this ask but it was mad regular when it was just sitting in my inbox?? but uh, Gods bless. I dont think I'm all that good at sub reader, and I may be ass at writing insecurities as I gotta be careful not to trigger myself lol, but I am gonna enjoy writing this thanks for requesting me beautiful (Also, I'm not much of a daddy person but I LOVE Master kinks.)

A/N: OMFG TUMBLR FUCKEF AND I HAD TO DELETE AND REWRITE EVERYTHINGGGG

I proofread like half of it yall imma do the rest in a couple days💀✋🏾

Fem!Sub!Insecure!Reader x Soft Dom Odin || NSFW lol || Breeding kink, Master/Slave use (ion know too much bout that dynamic lmao so you gon have to bare wit me), insecurities, and raw dogging (my staple)

Odin can't help but notice the slump of your shoulders, persistent ever since the other day. You'd gone to see Aphrodite for the first time, wanting to greet the entire greek pantheon personally upon your introduction as his wife. You left all smiles and laughter, yet despite saying it'd gone well, you possessed an air of sadness about you, and it's lingered throughout the week.

You sigh again, pulling him from his pondering. Your seat in the windowsill is backed by a view of the gray sky, ice cold rain pounding the glass. You have to be cold.

You jump upon finding your husband behind you, wrapping you lovingly in a thick blanket. The expression on his face is uncharacteristically soft, and in your heart you know he loves you... but why?

Why does he love you, when women as beautiful as Aphrodite exist? The lowest ranking goddesses glow with divinity, an inhuman shine to their very aura that you could never recreate. When you entered that room, you'd never felt more mortal. You were drawn to them, their beauty and grace calling out to you, leaving you with no choice but to gaze in awe.

You think you feel tears on your waterline.

How could he truly love you when surrounded by women like that?

"Women like that?"

You blink, feeling the warm tears slide down your cheeks as your face heats up. You didn't mean to say that aloud, by the gods. But it's too late now, and his simple question and deadpan face have broken the dams you worked so hard to maintain all week.

"Women like that! Like Aphrodite, like the other goddesses. They're beautiful my love, beautiful in a way I can't compare."

He tries to speak, but you rush over him, the snot filling your nose choking your speech and corrupting your voice. "How can you caress my scars when presented with unblemished skin? Look me in my eyes when theirs sparkle with such power? How can you even stand my voice! The goddesses of this forsaken place sound as lovely and hypnotic as sirens, even when their screeching at the top of their damned lungs!"

You cough, gasping for air. You hadn't taken a breath in that entire monologue. Your throat hurts from screaming, and at some point, you'd stood up and thrown away the cover he gave you. The cold air from the window spread goosebumps across your back, down your legs and arms. But it was fear that made you tremble, fear he'd see the logic in your words and leave you in the dust. Fear you'd walk the palace halls one day, haunted by the sounds of pleasure your husband brings out of other women, like so many wives here in Valhalla do now.

Your coughing dies out and leaves nothing but silence. Even your sniffling is quieted under his stare. The rain fades away and you find you can't even breathe as you wait for his word.

"I walk among these women everyday, yet you are the one I've chosen. Does that alone not set you apart from them?"

You blink at his tone– darkened with an unknown emotion, yet somehow still soft on your ears. His hand is on the small of your back, nudging you closer. The other cups your cheek.

"If you think yourself to be in a sea of gold, then you must be the diamond of the bunch. In my eyes, you shine brighter in your mortality then any divine being could ever hope to. Your scars are sweet against my lips, and your eyes as bright as the stars. Your voice is the one thing I bow to, my love, your beauty the one thing I praise."

It's silent again when he finishes, but you hear your heart breaking. Breaking for yourself, because how could you have been so blind? To ever in a million years think this man could do anything other than love you...

He chuckles, kissing your ear. "Say my name, Beloved."

Chaste kisses are placed softly about your face. Your forehead, your neck, your cheeks. And all the while you're crying, you love this man so much. "Odin..."

You try to pull back but find he's holding you to his chest. "Odin?"

"My name."

You blink, then smile. "Baby?"

He smiles into your neck, and you think he's having a rare cute moment. "Not that one."

Your smile takes on a confused twist.

Then, it hits you.

He chuckles again, this one filled with a bit of sadism.

"...Master?"

"Perfect."

In a show of heavenly strength you're transported from the window to the bed in the blink of an eye. As you sink into the bed, he tops you, fitting himself between your legs like coming home.

Your lips come together in a clash of lust and passion, the chastity of earlier long forgotten. Your hands tangle in his hair as he fondles you through your clothes. You could feel his hard on through his clothes, the familiar press against your heat filling you with... love?

Love... that's exactly what it was. You loved this, loved this treatment, loved to see your ever-quiet, ever-composed husband fall to pieces when he touched you. His stoic persona peeling back to reveal a man so head over heels he'd stomp on his pride in his rush to hump you like a dog in heat.

Hell, when he's fucking you like this, how could you have ever thought he'd leave?

Your right hand leaves his hair to help him tug at your clothes, the left sliding down to feel his muscles rippling under the skin of his back. He's finally gotten your chest bare, and latches onto the first nipple he sees, blindly working at the fabric to reveal the other tit. His battle-roughened fingers graze its peak, then pinch, hard enough to make you gasp and jump.

His tongue drags out similar sounds. Flicking the cute bud, circling it, right before sucking on it like it'd fix all his problems. Your fingers do away with his clothes with practiced motions as your eyes close, arching up into his touch.

You can hear him moaning almost silently as he kisses your chest, and you swear you hear him whisper, "Sweet."

You sigh at the feeling, at your adoration for this man.

He pulls back, and in the low light you admire the creases of his chest, the scars that litter his skin like stars in the sky. One hand parts your legs, spreading you open, admiring the sight of your clit twitching while arousal pours over your asscheeks to stain the sheets below.

His other hand takes your wrist to lay your palm flat over his heart. He's dragging your palm across his torso, over his heaviest scars, while rubbing electrifying circles into your clit. You tear up again as your legs twitch at the direct simulation. Even breathes turn to pants, and you feel your hips trying to rut into his touch. But your eyes never leave his. No, no– you hold his gaze and hone in on the feel of his skin on your hand, on the feel of realization like a new dawn in your mind.

"Do my scars horrify you?"

You can't tell if your tears are from pleasure or pain; the emotional kind. But they're pouring worse than the rain outside now, and you feel your nose getting stuffy again. "Of course not, my love."

He didn't mind the slip up this time. "If these do not cause aversion, how could your own bring you such despair?" Two fingers slipped inside you, and you gasp, fucking down on them instinctively. His thumb speeds up to match the pace of his fingers, and you pull him down into a kiss. His tongue tangles with yours, sucking on it and exploring your mouth. You kiss him back just as hard, running your teeth gently over his lips and tongue in turn.

"You are mine. You alone can see me like this. You alone can look at me like that, kiss me like that. I only want you–"

He smirks, and you think you're on the verge of cumming.

"Afterall, who else can take me so well? Who could look as pretty when I'm filling them up, watching my seed pour from their warmth? Do those goddesses beg like a good girl for me to stuff it back in? Present themselves as a willing slave, to be used until I've had enough? Until I've put a baby in them?"

Your eyes roll, your back arches, and the world turns white as you orgasm on his fingers. Trembles shake you, but big, comforting hands are working you through it so well. You rock into him until he pulls away, and despite the looming threat of overstimulation, you whine at the emptiness.

"Answer me, slave."

"N...no one, Master. No one except... Me."

You can't see it as your eyes are still closed, but he's smiling. Just a little, but it's full of more joy than a kid on Christmas.

A haze sits over your mind. His voice is the only thing you know now.

His thumbs take either side of your labia and spread you further, coaxing the juices out. He stares for a long time, unable to look away right up until his dick is so hard it aches. He forces his eyes to close, fumbling to pull it out. You both sigh when it slaps against your cunt.

"Please, Master... Cum inside me."

He looks up to find your eyes are just barely open and trained on him. His demeanor softens even more somehow, despite how out of place it seems.

"Anything for the prettiest girl in the world."

He slides in, fitting as though you were made for him. Your walls are warm and grip his cock like they missed it, arousal continuing to overflow and drizzle out, just barely able to slip around his cock. He puts a hand to your stomach, pressing down and make both your eyes roll as he feels how deep he is.

He thrusts– once, twice, rocking you, opening you up. From there on his pace builds to something fast and rough. Your nails drag down his back till blood is drawn, the pain fueling his manic humping. Screams of Master! Bounce through the air as he fucks you, drunk on the drag of his cock against your gspot. Your own hand goes down to rub at your throbbing clit as tears cloud your vision to the point of blindness.

When you arch, his hand is at the small of your back, helping you, holding you. Your bodies press together and you can't help but think, 'fuck. He's beautiful.'

You allow your eyes to close as a smile spreads across your face. Your husband is beautiful. So you are, you have to be,

"Beautiful."

Your eyes drift to your husband's face upon hearing his voice. Velvety and deep, and filled with roughness from his approaching orgasm. You laugh, a breathless thing. "You too, Master." You say, batting your lashes.

His chuckle is equally breathless, "'M gonna fill you up now, lovely girl. Take all of me."

An order, one you'd jump to obey.

You joined at the lips in a passionate kiss, your finger working your clit hard as the other hand holds the back of his neck. He holds your legs in a mating press and strokes deep, hitting your deepest spot before releasing inside with a shudder and groan.

You throw your head back as your own body freezes from the force of your orgasm. You're wracked by shudders and hear naught but the sounds of your own broken moans. You can feel him inside of you, spilling his seed for you alone to keep. It's warm, and you can't help but relax at the feeling.

Odin stays inside for long moments after, holding it in, before pulling out. You blink at the sudden loss, to exhausted to do much else. You let yourself be gathered in an embrace, lazily enjoy the soft kisses he presses to your face.

"In the morning, we'll shower. For now, we rest." You hum your affirmation. His arms are tight around your body. You have no choice but to sink into his embrace, sink into a deep, deep sleep.

Right before you drift off, you hear him whisper,

"I love you, my gorgeous wife."

You wish you'd stayed awake long enough to respond back.

-------

A/N: yes yes I know this and many other ask have been sitting in my inbox for months😓writing is hard okay?? And I am very very sleepy all the time. This was fun to write but god did I hate writing the smut. Ion know nothing about master kinks, I use them in my own lil way so the formal way is unknown to me😭but uhh, I hope you enjoyed, and requester if you see this I'm sorry🫶🏾🥹I love you🥲

#record of ragnarok #shuumatsu no valkyrie #record of ragnarok x reader #snv odin #snv odin x reader #ror odin #odin x reader #odin #odin smut #ror odin x reader #the psychotics writing

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swearphil · 5 months

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2023 writing gif-making round up

Rules (adapted for fic, gifs, art, etc.): Share what you made this year! It can be works you posted to Ao3, Wattpad, Tumblr, or anywhere else! You can share everything you made or just the projects you're most excited about. tagged by @reasonandfaithinharmony! thank you, friend!

buckle up, friends, because I somehow posted 98 gif sets this year and it's probably going to be 100 sets by the end of the year tbh. that number sounds so ridiculous. it's all your faults because part of the reason why I made so much was because I felt so encouraged and loved by the people I've gotten to know and know better this year, so thank you.

I started trying to put all the sets in a post and that just got overwhelming for me to look at so we're doing my top favorites with some fun statistics at the end. I think it'll come as no surprise that I mostly made rwrb and heartstopper sets this year, so I decided to do my top 5 rwrb sets, top 5 heartstopper sets, and top 10 miscellaneous sets.

top 5 rwrb sets

page to screen ripped pages: this is the first set I made after the movie was released. I worked on it for hours and really enjoy how it turned out. the text placement was what took the longest. I knew what words from each passage I wanted to highlight so it took some rearranging to make sure those were visible.

acd x all american bitch: the idea for this came about when casey posted an instagram story of GUTS and songs that correspond with their characters. I love me some bi coloring, so using that for this set was really fun!

firstprince x wildest dreams: I don't know what it is about this set that makes me love it so much. I think it's the shade of pink and then the light orange from the text.

henry "that is him, part and parcel": I adore henry and bea and that's all I have to say about this set.

firstprince x exile: I have thoroughly enjoyed reading the tags for this one and I am not sorry at all for the pain I have caused. I got the idea for this set after sending @kiwiana-writes the fake fic title "I gave so many signs" and they wrote a heartwrenching summary. I immediately wanted to do something with it!

top 5 heartstopper sets

moments of healing: day two of heartstoppercentral's pride celebration for this year. putting this together made me really emotional. I'm so grateful for alice and these moments of communication we get on the show.

imogen x ballad of a homeschooled girl: yes, I did intentionally use colors on the lesbian flag for this set. it was actually going to be purple at first to match the GUTS album but I didn't like how it looked. I tried pink, liked it, wondered what color worked with pink, and thus the color palette was born!

narlie x brighter than sunshine: day 3 of heartstoppercentral's pride celebration. as schitt's creek fans know (and as a couple people pointed out in the tags), this is the song that plays at the end of "Meet the Parents." I think I knew right away I was going to use this song for this day of the event.

narlie x fearless (taylor's version): I still can't believe I made this set. it's something just last year I would have deemed too complicated. I'm proud of myself for this one.

charlie standing up to ben: this set idea was suggested by @swiftlythebest. idk if this was intentional on alice's part, but I really enjoy how charlie says similar sentiments in both episodes. like "leave me alone" -> "I don't want to see you ever again."

top 10 miscellaneous sets

alexis rose + "destined to be on fire": I can't believe how much I've grown as a gif maker over the past three years and this set shows that growth. I also adore alexis and her journey.

david/patrick open mic: I made this set once I got back home from seeing noah in concert. I was truly close to tears during the concert when I realized I was watching him perform a song from a show I have loved for three years.

david/patrick relationship dynamic: @reasonandfaithinharmony @roseapothecary and @rmd-writes are to thank for this set coming into existence. the fact that I had so many scenes to choose from shows that this truly is david and patrick's dynamic.

schitt's creek + barbie posters: I knew right away what kind of barbie david and alexis were going to be.

GUTS + favorite lyrics: god I really love this set. the typography? the coloring? I really outdid myself.

the good witch + ages: another set I just absolutely adore. I love the shades of pink I used. also, maisie, thank you for including consecutive years in the album because it really would have bugged me if they weren't lol

danandphilgames + fuck land: my url becomes relevant again! if you told me at the start of this year that the gaming channel would be back, I would not have believed you.

calliette x love affair: I really love the overlays for this one. it just ended up working well on its own with little manipulation from me. the song is from the end of the last episode. it worked great for the antagonists event!

ellie x you're on your own, kid: I had this idea for a few weeks before I actually got around to making it. I remember being worried and surprised that no one else that I saw did a set with this song.

vampire by olivia rodrigo: the lyric "bloodsucker, fame fucker" really did something to me.

fun statistics: out of the 98 sets I made

39 are rwrb

34 are heartstopper

8 are schitt's creek

6 are music artists

5 are dan and phil

4 are the last of us

1 is tarlos

1 is calliette

32 use taylor lyrics

tagging (no pressure of course!) @roseapothecary @swiftlythebest @rmd-writes @leclercpiastri @mulderscully @victoriaspriing and if anyone else wants to do this, feel free to say I tagged you!

#tag games #i hope all the links are right because at this point i don't feel like checking

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pastrygeckos · 22 days

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Let's hope Tumblr doesn't eat my post this time! @necrosemancy I'm going to include a link to a Brad Mondo video about bleaching/colouring your hair at home, because I generally agree with him and it's way easier for most people to follow instructions from a video than from text

youtube

I also find that you'll get a much better result, as well as a lot less damage using "salon" bleach and oxidiser, whilst with bleach box dye kits you have a lot less control over the amount of lift. Personally I use Wella Blondor because that's what I worked with in the salon. For a natural level 2, I would go with a 9%/30 volume developer. The really great news is that red is one of the easiest colours to get when you're bleaching, because red, orange, and yellow are natural parts of the lightening process!

The higher you lift, the brighter the red you can achieve. Like Brad mentions in the video, the trickiest thing is just to not apply to the roots until the lengths are around the level you're looking for, since the scalp produces heat that speeds up the lightening process, so if possible, it's really great to have someone on hand to help with the back of your head, etc.

Once you've bleached, you can go over with a semi/demi permanent dye in the shade you want. I personally use Arctic Fox's 'Wrath' watered down with conditioner for my pinks, and it makes beautiful darker reds too. My favourite semi/demis are Arctic Fox, Manic Panic, and Directions - though if I could get Xmondo dye for a more reasonable price in the UK, I would love to try it, and I've only heard great things, so if you have a Sally's Beauty, it might be worth a look!

I'm generally a bigger proponent for the bleach and dye method than just permanent dye, since you have more control of the actual shade (for example, you could mix a little bit of purple into the root colour for more depth, and either water down the red with some conditioner for the tips, or perhaps mix in a little yellow/orange just for some more extra nice details), you have more control of the amount of lift, and it's much easier to get rid of old dye if you want a change!

I hope that helps a bit ☺️ We'd love to see some before/afters if possible when you get to it!

#hair dye #hair bleach #bleaching hair #pastrymom #text post #Youtube

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llynwen · 1 month

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hi you're European right? I'm curious to know your thoughts about how the American south is portrayed in true detective bc I've been there and yes it's exactly like that but even moreso. Haunted ass beautiful country

Thank You So Much for such an interesting ask!

In the case of many europeans who were born before the Internet was such a big thing, we mostly learned about the us from films and shows. my childhood experience was watching reruns of spaghetti westerns and early 2000s rom coms, family comedies and kids movies, and feeling that the technicolor reality of america was somehow so much better than the Gray of eastern europe. the discrepancy isn't as noticeable now as it used to be when i was a kid, but you could Smell the post-sovietness some days. the life i saw in the movies was anything But the bleak, overwhelming reality of the early 2000s in my country that just made you feel nauseous and gave you a migraine. like i remember being Shocked at the technology of CDs and MP3 players. it was 2007.

the consensus was always that america was somewhere where everything was better. bigger. brighter. america was where you went to be happy. where you could breathe.

then, as i grew up, i obviously realized that this was a load of bullshit. i don't remember when the shift took place, but sometime in my teenage years, i suppose. by that time, my english has gotten good enough to actually participate in social media (that are predominantly american, like tumblr for example. i've been here for a decade) and actually engage in discourse. to learn about the Real america and what life looked like for the average person. and it wasn't great. guns, systemic oppression, privatized healthcare, the capitalist rot. none of that was present in the movies of my childhood.

now, in true detective, the south reminds me so much of how eastern europe felt in my childhood. it's nowhere near similar to it visually, the nature and architecture and people are all different, but it is Stifling, Suffocating, like the sky is gonna come down on your head. the ash and aluminum line actually describes it so good. what i was most surprised by, though, was the people. starting from marty (let's not focus on rusty here as we can all agree he doesn't really belong with the rest of the characters), he is a perfect example of the average family man. i love his character Because he's a shit and a cringeass loser, but in the scenes of him interacting with his daughters in '02, the feeling that he evokes in me is Disgust. and i feel like that's a common archetype of the father-provider that thinks his role in the house ends with making money. he sits in his chair, makes everybody miserable with his very presence, and expects the food to be brought to him. that man has never scrubbed a toilet in his life. i know men like him. i've met them, talked to them. i'm related to them. they're everywhere. that disgust feels intimate. now, the other characters that surprised me were the side characters, the people rust and marty go to question. tyrone's mother, the prostitutes, dora's friend at the scrap yard - they remind me of my people. now, i really don't want to come off as classist or some shit like that - but in both the show And my reality, the divide between the working class and the educated crowd is Stark. that is not to say that one is better than the other (i firmly believe that a lack of education can make you happier, if you think about it. content with a simple life, happy to work in a mine your whole life, live in a wielka płyta apartment and go to the sea once a year. if that. this is very specific to my region, sorry). the way those side characters talk, behave, even look - that is Nothing like the movies. they're not the flashy main characters, they're imperfect in every sense - they Look like people, have flaws, crooked teeth, they don't dress like supermodels, they can be stupid, they drink and smoke and cheat and lie. they're Human, not movie protagonists. and i love that reality in the show. makes it feel that much more authentic.

i don't know how specific that is to the south; are the people like that in other places? are the fishermen in luisiana the same as in minessota? is the suffocating feeling specific to the iberia parish, or is that just how it is in small town america? i dont know. the problem is, i wanna find out.

see, i never lost that childhood wonder. call me naive, but i still wanna Go. i still want to see the american dream with my own two eyes, even if it means i'm gonna watch it shatter in real time. i graduate college in a little over a year with a masters degree, and for right now my plan is to find a way to go work at a ranch in montana or wyoming. that's all i want. my favorite thing about america is not the culture, not the people, not the Possibility, but the Space. ironically, the stolen land is what compels me most. i want to experience that open space, to Breathe, and for the first time in my life feel my lungs filling up fully. i will be disappointed, full stop, but i want to have that experience.

the american south is a fascinating place to me, always has. the specific mix of cultures, the tradition and lack of it, even the bigotry and hate, it's all endlessly interesting. as you said, haunted but oh so beautiful. it scares the shit out of me. i need to go and feel it bite me.

#sorry for going off like that lmao #but yeah. thats them thoughts #if you wanna talk about it more PLEASE LEAVE ME ANOTHER ASK/RESPOND TO THIS/DM ME #thank you again for this ask #love you mwah mwah mwah #ask #true detective

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slow-slug · 1 year

Text

(not) lonesome practicalism

AN: Okay first of all, the person who forced me into making tumblr account, please do not look at this post lmao I want to save my dignity, let's pretend it's not here. Second of all it's all @angelchigiri fault that I've written it, and thirdly it was not suppose to be that long but my hand slipped. And at the end I want to mention, english is not my first language and I do not have a beta, so yk, probably a lot of mistakes, sorry :,) Enjoy!

Its all fluff I promise! Oh and it's Chigiri x Reader ofc!

🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀

You pouted as the ball you just had kicked rolled not into the direction you wanted it to go. You had to admit it was a very pitiful picture, the net of the goal waved slightly with barely noticeable breeze, and the ball was, well, not in the middle of it as you wanted it to be.

It was really frustrating, you were on the field that belonged to your old school, for quite some time now. Long enough that the sun started to set, and the hot summer temperature was slowly but surely becoming a chilly one.

You felt like a fool, despite the fact that because of summer vacations no one was nearby, you still were feeling rather embarrassed. How was kicking a ball into the right direction so hard? It just never went the way you wanted it to go, honestly it was so silly, all you wanted to do was learn some basic football movements. That’s all! Was it so bad wanting to be more invested in your boyfriend's activities and passions?

You flopped down on the hard ground, feeling the artificial texture of it beneath your fingers.

Sighhhh.

Honestly, Chigiri was so amazing in every way. He was caring, a gentleman in always asking about your mood, and making sure you were comfortable in everything you two were doing. Since you started dating, two months ago, suddenly your world felt a lot brighter and colorful. You spent so much time together, and when not, you were texting and sending stupid photos to each other. A true honeymoon phase in all its glory.

But the most important thing to you that he was doing was the way he was so invested in your hobbies and interests. You never had someone so, so genuinely interested in your passions. It was such an amazing feeling, when he sent you links to silly videos that he knew you would be interested in, and what's most important was the fact that he was never scared to spend time with you doing those activities. No matter what it was. Baking? He would research the best recipe that there exists. Dancing? Bring it on, with his coordination skills it was a lot of fun twirling together. Drawing? He wasn’t really good at it, but you still had the portret he drew of you, hanging up proudly above your desk. Hell, he even went shopping with you for new makeup products you needed and later, when you got back to your house, he did face masks with you and cuddled while watching some cheesy kdrama.

And you wanted to return the favor, so, a whole week you spent walking to the field and practicing the damned football. It was your favorite thing, watching him being all excited about matches and scores. He smiled so widely and his eyes sparkled with such a real passion. And you wanted to be part of this world as well.

You understood the rules of the game, knew the professional and more inside terms used for different moves, you were there for Chigir’s practice when you only could, you were watching matches with him and engaged in long discussions about them.

The only thing is that, well, you kindly speaking, sucked at playing the actuall game.

And it was so embarrassing!

You heard your boyfriend's wishes that you could play some nice and short matches. He had never said it outloud, but you could read between the lines well enough that you understood his shy smiles and quick looks on the field when you were passing by it. So you did the only reasonable thing. Decided to learn this sport, at least a little bit, so you could surprise Chigiri and see his beautiful smile when you would show him the skills you had.

You observed the slowly moving clouds. Well, you must admit that the practice you had, everyday for the whole week, was really effortless. Sadly. The ball never went in the direction you wanted it to go, you couldn’t run with it without losing it or falling on your face. You didn’t even attempt dribbling.

You covered your eyes with your arm sighing quietly, and felt the frustrated tears to prickle them. This isn’t fair, you’ve seen so many matches, and Chigiri’s practices, so why couldn’t you repeat any of the things he did?

The moment you decided to stand up and try again you felt someone laying down next to you also sighing quietly. Your tensed muscles relaxed as you felt your boyfriend’s comforting smell enveloping you. Dammit, you didn’t even hear him creeping on you.

You laid in silence for some time, breathing quietly. Then you felt his pinky touching delicately yours, and you smiled softly against your will.

“Are you gonna tell me what you've been up to this past week?” He asked quietly not breaking the tiny physical contact he had with you.

“It’s stupid” you’ve murmured.

“It’s not if you spent so much time on it” he responded gently.

That made you uncover your face and shift it so you could take a better look at him. Pink hair spilled around him, and tickled his perfectly looking skin. His pink eyes blinked at you, patiently waiting for your answer.

“Promise you won’t laugh?” You’ve asked uncertainly, it was so stupid now that you looked at it. He nodded softly, enveloping your hand fully and giving it an encouraging squeeze. “I just wanted to learn some basic football I guess…” you turned your eyes to your hands observing the color of your skin. You heard a quiet oh, and your face flamed red.

You’ve quickly sat up, and buried your head in your knees. That’s it for you, never coming back nope. And Chigiri was still silent! He did sit up with you, not so abruptly as you of course. He was always so smooth and elegant in every move.

“You did?” He sounded weirdly breathless. You nodded without looking at him. You sat there in silence for a while. You wanted to go away, to stand and ask Chigiri to forget it, to never mention it again, so you can just skip this embarrassing chapter of your life. Yet, before you could act on those thoughts, you felt arms wrapping around you from behind and his hair tickle your nape when he leaned on it with his forehead.

“Gods I love you so much.” He whispered in a hushed tone. You felt the warmth on your cheeks and the butterflies in your stomach. Chigiri never really says it outloud, his love is more hidden in gentle kisses and in the time you two spend together. You muffled a groan, his random declarations of love will always mean so much to you.

He stood up, and turned to be in front of you. When you looked up, the last sun rays made up a halo around his hair and the smile that graced his lips was so fond and kind. He put out a hand in your direction.

“Come I’ll teach you.” And in what world would you say no to him?

🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀

i feel cringe

#I am not coming out of my house ever again #i am so embarrassed #chigiri x reader #chigiri x you #chigiri x y/n #chigiri hyoma #blue lock #bllk #bllk chigiri #fanfic #x reader #oneshot #chigiri is so pretty I would cry #i suck at writing #i did my best tho

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clownsindresses · 1 year

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Long fiber art post incoming!

Made my first ball of yarn!!!!!

So super excited about it, and perhaps the best part is that it was made completely out of scrap yarn, the reason I wanted to learn to spin in the first place

It's an acrylic blend, if not 100 acrylic because I couldn't find a few labels. It was so cool to make little rolags on my "carding combs" (dog brushes) and I think they look like cursed caterpillars

I learned a huge amount from this. I kinda got lazy in one of the singles so it's messy, and I had extra of the other single. But that just meant that I learned how to do a plying bracelet! I think I actually like plying that way more than just a normal ball. This also means that the smaller skein is made of the better, more even spun single

One of the singles also got to travel to Arizona with me when visiting family, where I also got some of my first truly ✨fancy✨ fiber that didn't come in my starting kit. It is so so pretty and I'm crazy excited to use it, especially because I've realized I really like the look of two separate colored singles plyed together, plus I got my first batt, which was super soft

The store was also my first experience ever being in a fiber shop. Everyone was super nice and they also apparently ship online which I'm super excited about, since I've been looking for a fiber shop and they seemed quite affordable with good quality. Plus they were super open to helping and talking about anything you needed or didn't understand. Also saw my first spinning wheel irl at a giant antique store. Way too expensive plus it would've been super hard to get home, but it was beautiful and I kinda wanted to cry about not getting it, even though I know it wasn't a good idea to buy it

I was hoping to find fiber or spindles there considering it was a huge place, but sadly, there was nothing. I did get some sewing patterns that were nice though

Lastly I want to ask for ideas. I have about 111 yards split between two skeins of my first handspun yarn, ( and , respectively), but no ideas of what to make with it. It's a nice combo of pastel green and pink with occasional brighter bits. It's generally thin, maybe a bit heavier than sock weight? But there are slubs and thicker pieces every so often, especially throughout the larger skein. I generally crochet amigurumi but I'm open to making most things. I'd love to make something to hold onto for a long time since I'm a sentimental person. All ideas are appreciated but Tumblr is glitched so I can't reply to any comments or make my own, on even my own posts, so reblogs are totally welcome since they make it easier for me to respond

Thank you for reading this excited, but very long, post! -Estar

#spinning #handspun yarn #drop spinning #handspinning #yarn

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avaantares · 1 year

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(yet another) rant: Please stop with the frivolous Trigger Warnings

(Note: If you want to skip the recipe blog intro and get to the actual important stuff, scroll down to the header that says, "Which Warning to Use on Your Post")

Sooo I made a text post that had a few words in capital letters mixed in for effect (the rest of the text was in standard formatting). Someone reblogged it with the tags "tw: all caps" and "tw: capital letters."

The existence of these tags, specifically in the form of a trigger warning, struck me as weird. I mean, I can see why someone might be uncomfortable with an all-caps text block, if they've dealt with abusive/angry capslocked emails or something, and I can see how large blocks of capitalized text could be difficult to read, and some users might prefer to avoid them. But...

Limited capitalization as emphasis (e.g. dropping OH WAIT in the middle of otherwise lower-case text to indicate a shift in tone) does not present the same issues as a solid block of capslocked text;

I have not encountered this tag in the plethora of posts that employ the meme/joke format of subverting standard case usage or alternating case (yes, the SpongeBob meme is a thing with an actual academic definition, and it also predates the existence of SpongeBob by some decades); and

Most importantly, while formatting definitely affects user experience and can be worth tagging for that reason, I wouldn't have escalated it to the level of a trigger, which is a term with a pretty specific definition:

The concept of ‘triggering’ describes the re-experiencing of unpleasant PTSD symptoms such as intrusive thoughts being evoked by exposure to materials which spark traumatic memories. Hence, content warnings have a long presence in psychiatric literature. [source: Typology of content warnings and trigger warnings: Systematic review]

(Full disclosure for anyone who hasn't already learned from reading my rants: I have a background in behavior science, so I'm all about scientific definitions and correct application of same.)

But I thought that maybe I was misinterpreting what was being tagged, and I like learning what I should tag in future posts, so I thought I'd look deeper into those tags and see if I was missing something.

Welp. It sure was educational.

Turns out there are established "trigger warnings" on Tumblr for all of the following (not a comprehensive list; these are just the ones I also saw when scrolling through the caps tags, since many of those posts had more than one thing tagged):

any text with two or more capital letters in sequence

any text in italics

any text underlined

any text in boldface

any text in a font other than the default

any text in a color other than the default (as well as tags for each individual color)

images in black and white

images in color (how dare color exist)

images with... subjectively brighter? colors

images without ALT text

posts containing emoji

and my favorite entry, which for obvious reasons I can't describe by the content it's supposedly protecting us from:

"tw just in case"

O_o

So... where to even begin.

I guess I'll get the promised rant out of the way (for those of you who prefer to stay positive, skip ahead two paragraphs): It's no wonder that much of society mocks the very concept of trigger warnings, when they're used this... I have to come right out and say frivolously. Heck, even I'm having trouble taking the greater Tumblr community seriously right in this moment, and I've been part of it for *mumble* years and practically live here. Who in the academic/corporate/entertainment/quote-unquote real world is going to honor a request for content warnings when they see that the """kids these days""" consider italicized text a psychological trigger they need to be protected from? And you can just imagine some dudebro saying, "Wow, these special snowflakes are so fragile they're even traumatized by seeing color, lulz. We should see what really freaks them out!" ...and that won't end well.

The obvious rebuttal to that point is to argue that these tags aren't intended for use by the outside world, most of which already thinks Tumblr died years ago. Not that this has ever stopped Twitter and Reddit and Facebook users from screenshotting Tumblr posts to claim ownership of mock before, but honestly the extra-Tumblr world is the less important concern here, so I won't labor that point. The more immediate issue is how this affects Tumblr users, the Tumblr community, and the experience we're all so proud of being able to curate for ourselves.

The critical point is this: Tags exist for Tumblr users to find things of interest and avoid things they don't want to see. Warnings exist for Tumblr users to protect themselves. Conflating the two can cause not only confusion, but the opposite of the desired effect of being able to curate your experience.

Please note that it is not wrong to tag any of the things listed above. By all means, tag everything in your post! Tag away! Tag your text formatting and images and colors! Use that whole tag space so people can find/not find your content as desired! But none of these things should be categorized as trigger warnings. Trigger warnings, content warnings, and tags are all separate things, and should be used appropriately so people know what to look for/avoid in a post.

Now, you may well ask: Why do the semantics matter? If something's tagged, why does it matter how it's tagged? Isn't it better to warn people about anything and everything that they might possibly not like?

For those affected by PTSD, trauma, phobias, anxiety, psychosis, optically-sensitive medical conditions, etc., being able to trust tags -- and the community's overall reliability where they are concerned -- can be critical to their health and well-being. When the community's tags become imprecise, sloppy, or unspecified -- for example, when people start throwing tags like "tw just in case" on their posts instead of actually describing what is in the post -- it becomes unpleasant or even dangerous for those people to exist in that community. And although doubtless well-intentioned, the kind of overzealous helicopter tagging that labels things like text formatting or the presence of emoji as a trigger does two things: First, it can confuse filters and sandbag search results (for search purposes, tags are treated like a word bank, rather than individual line items). Second, it fosters a general lack of regard for real, life-threatening triggers. If Tumblr users get used to seeing every tiny little thing called out as a "trigger" -- trigger warning, there's a picture of a bird in this post! trigger warning, I can't spell so there's probably a word misspelled in this post! trigger warning, someone used a heart emoji in this post! trigger warning, here's a photo with the color orange in it! trigger warning, there's a banana in this post! Self image trigger warning, I'm having the worst hair day, lol! j/k! -- then subconsciously, "trigger warning" becomes synonymous with "lots of things random people find mildly annoying, so tag stuff if you happen to think of it" instead of "a few important things we should be diligent about tagging because someone's life might quite literally depend on it."

I know categorizing tags can be confusing, and in recent years there hasn't been much consistency in usage on Tumblr, so here's a cheat sheet to help you decide what warnings to use (and to be clear, I didn't make these up; these are sourced from academic literature and teaching guides, and were -- back in the Olden Days -- also more widely used on Tumblr.)

For a more thorough description of the most common types of content to post warnings about, see this PDF.

Which Warning to Use on Your Post:

Trigger warning (TW): Used to denote content that may trigger a PTSD episode, a severe psychological reaction, or a physiological reaction due to a medical condition (e.g. epilepsy). Broadly speaking, this warning is intended to mitigate risks that may exist because of a viewer's personal experience and/or medical status. Examples of things that should be tagged TW: sexual violence; child abuse; flashing gifs

Content warning (CW): Used to denote sensitive material that may make viewers uncomfortable or upset, or that some viewers may prefer not to see, but not necessarily invoke a traumatic personal experience. Broadly speaking, this warning is concerned with a viewer's comfort level. This can include general concepts (e.g. discussion of homophobia) as well as specific instances (e.g. use of homophobic language). Examples of things that should be tagged CW: racism; nudity; death

Descriptive tags (not warnings): Used to describe the content of a post, without value judgment, so that it is searchable and/or avoidable. (And also to write rambling comma-free essays, because Tumblr is just Like That. But that's a whole separate thing.) Examples of things that can be (generally) tagged: the themes or topics being discussed; black and white images; capitalized text; insects; the color green; memes; rainbows; digital art; literally anything else that appears in your post

Can people still dislike/be upset by things that aren't on a broadly-accepted TW/CW list? Absolutely. But that's not quite the same as a trigger, and that's why we also have general tags.

Here's an example of the difference between disliking or being triggered by content (source: "The right way to use a Trigger Warning," emphasis mine):

Trigger Warnings are here to prevent people who have experienced traumatic experiences to be exposed to something that might trigger a physical and/or mental reaction. Trigger is the key word here. “Trigger*” is used to talk about PTSD and mental illness. “Triggered” and “offended/upset” are not the same concept. I can be upset if I see a picture of a beautiful cake because I cannot bake, but it won’t trigger a post-traumatic reaction.

You aren't going to be able to anticipate every single person's likes and dislikes, phobias, emotional associations, and so on. There's a temptation to try to cover every base imaginable, but that's actually... less than helpful. Actively unhelpful, in some cases. In addition to the reasons I cited earlier, here's an example of how "I'll tag it just in case someone doesn't like a thing" warnings can be confusing:

Let's say I have two followers: WingHater96 has a deep phobia of butterflies, while ButterSuperFly78 adores butterflies. Tagging a post "butterflies" helps them both navigate my feed more efficiently: WingHater96 can block the entire "butterfly" tag, while ButterSuperFly78 can search for it.

However, let's say I tagged that post in the form of a warning like "tw: butterflies" and hid it below a Read More just in case someone following me didn't like butterflies. WingHater96 would still have that post blocked, because it contains the word "butterfly" in the tag. It would also still appear in ButterSuperFly78's search results for the same reason -- the presence of the warning doesn't affect search results at all. But when ButterSuperFly78 sees the warning tag, they might now be confused about whether the post is full of pretty butterfly photography (which they would like to see), or if maybe the reason I put a warning on it is because it's about butterflies being harmed, because why else would you warn someone about butterflies when they're the best things ever? But wait, does OP know that they're the best things ever? Is the warning there because OP secretly hates butterflies?? Do they need to unfollow OP now because they're a butterfly-hater??? and ButterSuperFly78 would not know whether to view the post or scroll past until they psychoanalyze me to determine my personal feelings on butterflies.

Adding the warning provided zero additional benefit for the person who already had the tagged thing blocked, but it caused additional problems for the person actively seeking out that thing.

Obviously this is a bit exaggerated (...though, speaking from experience, only a bit), but it's a lot more efficient to just list the things that are in a post in the tags without framing them as warnings. That way, people with different likes and dislikes can curate their own experience more easily, and know to take trigger and content warnings more seriously when they DO appear.

TL;DR Trigger warnings exist to help people avoid PTSD or adverse psychological/physiological reactions. Casually throwing the word "trigger" in front of things that are not triggers makes people stop taking the need for warnings seriously, and can confuse people trying to curate their Tumblr experience. Reserve TW and CW for actual triggers/sensitive content and use standard tags for other things.

#long post #tumblr tutorial #trigger warnings vs content warnings vs tags #frivolous use is one reason people are dismissive of the need for trigger/content warnings #tags already let people filter things they just don't like #not everything has to be a warning #ava rants about things #tumblr culture #(also this post contains all caps boldface italics colored text and font size changes if anyone is concerned with such things)

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chipped-chimera · 10 months

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Okay since I'm actually awake now, (proper) HAIR UPDATE! ❤️🖤❤️

I wanted to add this onto my post from last night but tumblr hates reblog photosets. Anyways I was very aware that posting my V in the darkest corner of an apartment with black hair wasn't really ... showing anything - but it was very much her vibe and that's been the point of this entire project, buckling down and learning Blender from nothing, reverse-engineering mods and systems I was only NEW to about a month or so ago so I could figure out how to bring 'back' her hair, but like ... even more how I wished it was.

And it's finally done (well ... structurally).

More development rambles beloooow ~

I'm not releasing this (yet) as I'd now put myself in 'polish' phase, where I'll be tweaking some physics and other stuff like the vertex painting which influences the shine - brighter hair colours look a bit too blown out at the moment, and I'm not sure if this is because it's too shiny or because of my custom normals (may have to tone them down a bit, idk). You can see what I mean below -

Shadows are also behaving oddly at certain angles, and I wasn't sure if it was a harsh lighting situation but upon changing the lighting up ... no. Something weird is going on. So that'll need troubleshooting (for lighter colours at least). Also some textures just are acting weird on certain parts when I don't think they should look that way so yeah ... more ... troubleshooting ahead. :V

I'm also going to look into if there's something I can do for the 'efficiency' of this mesh because I noticed some pretty severe frame slowdowns taking close up shots - though only sometimes?? Not sure what that was about at all. I'm assuming it's my gpu being pushed harder as I get closer to the hair, but upon changing the hair in the character creator to another and then back it just went away again? So no idea what the hell was going on there. It felt a bit almost like a memory leak, but I didn't do a check to see what my system was doing so I'll have another look if it happens again.

Possible (hypothetical) causes:

Could be texture size, these hair cards have 2k textures apart from the alpha (4k) which is double vanilla textures so that is also a possibility as a fix (though I'd be loathe to do it).

Double rigs. I noticed last night when in my rigging phase with UUH4V that reducing it from three meshes and rigs to TWO meshes and two rigs significantly improved framerate lag (I mean it was minor but noticeable enough) in the character creation screen, so it could hypothetically be something to do with calculations of running two rigs at the same time. If that is the case, I could probably just rig this to the Alt hair rig. Currently I'm using Alt's for the back and left side of the hair, whereas the fringe at the front and the curl over the shoulder is rigged to Old Rogue. I'll probably still keep using UUH4V just … one rig only.

Last in the list? Hair cards. There are a lot. Maybe too many. They're also of a higher poly than last time. That said I've looked at other mods with heavier polycounts than mine (what gave me the courage to push further in the first place after my very low poly attempt 1.0) that caused more obvious frame slowdown in just the character creator alone. I feel there is still a minor slowdown currently but it's on the edge of noticeable (like, 30fps vs 60fps). As it goes though, this is still pretty insanely efficient (thank YOU Hair Tools for Blender).

BONUS: Mods. Other mods. The thing I use to hook in a DLL for pose control. Could always be that?

So uh, guess that's what I'll be working on. I don't know how much time I should be spending on getting this 'frame efficient' considering anyone using this would be primarily be for screenshots, and given the specs I'm currently running (AMD Ryzen 5 CPU and an RTX 2060) are being re-classed as the 'bare minimum' with Phantom Liberty coming out, and I am planning on upgrades to my PC anyway.

We'll see? (Though in my heart of hearts, I have have had potato PCs for years and I want to support the lowest specs I possibly can). I dunno let me know what you think about that one as a possible mod user (and someone who actually reads these, wow).

Anyways all that matters is jesus christ I finally did this. I taught myself hair. From scratch.

Promised tutorial ... soon. After I maybe do nothing for a few days lol.

#cyberpunk 2077 modding #my mods #kerytalk #powered by nothing but autistic hyperfocus and love of blorbos here #also I am a bit on the fence with releasing the hair too cause it's based off a mod hair I used to use so idk #cross that bridge when I get there I deserve veg out time now lmao #my ocs

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that-wizard-oki · 8 months

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Just wanted to say that I’ve been following you for a *while* and even though I don’t use Tumblr very much or interact with the wizzy fandom anymore, I still have your notifications on and whenever I see a post from you, it sparks joy.

Also little posts you write about your experiences working with KI give me a lot of hope. I’m a student and recently did a whole major-change thing so that I’m now studying with the end-goal of entering the video game industry, and seeing stuff you post gives me a weird sense of hope (I don’t know if that’s the right word- I just got home from a 10-hour shift that was preceded by 3 lectures so it’s a bit foggy in my brain. Just wanted to say this now because I know that if I didn’t do it now, I would keep putting it off).

Just wanted to say thank you. You make a lot of peoples’ days brighter. :)

This ask has been sitting in my inbox for a few days and I just wanted to say it made me cry real tears the first time i read it. To be frank I've had a really, really tough past 6 or so months with my health issues. There was a brief time where I wasn't sure if I could work it was so bad, which of course was an awful thought to have just starting out at KI. I've been through lots of shit in my life, but one thing that always grounded me was this community. It's both an escape from reality, but also has allowed me to connect with people even when I couldn't get out of bed, both in the past, and now. I'm doing a decent amount better now, but I can still be hard not to get in your own head about things, and for a good many months earlier this year, I felt like I couldn't escape my own mind and body. It was scary, and still is at times.

But messages like this really put into perspective how my presence has an impact on others. The notion that people i've never really met who look forward to my little posts and content honestly keep me going when things get tough. It so small but gives me reason to not give up. I want to keep going for you all.

Pardon the sappy talk, but genuinely, thank you anon. I have no doubt in my mind you'll achieve your own goals in the industry, and I would love to support you and any others as much as I can who're in a similar boat.

I love you all so much <3

#y'all are like my mana <3 #oki answers a thing #anon

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tavyliasin · 1 month

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About the Navigating Fandom post: Has someone been complaining on a different site? I've seen no complaints on Tumblr so far (not that they're not out there).

I am aware of sections of fandom who are unhappy with certain content existing, even when it is tagged appropriately. I thought it best to cover all bases on all sites so those who are newer to certain platforms know what they might expect and how to handle it when things aren't what they hoped for. As a rule, I don't tend to get involved in discourse or fandom arguments, I far prefer to focus on overriding the bad with the good, celebrating the diversity and creativity of the fandom, and supporting those who have been impacted by upsetting situations. Which, I'm well aware is a lot of vagueposting, but I try to curate my spaces for my own well-being too. And that means if I'm seeing events or discourse cross my feed, they're already a big thing, and with more than one over the last few days it felt like a good time to take a longer look at the platforms we have available to the fandom and how we can use them to have the best fandom experience. In any fandom there will be darker corners to it, and with one as big as BG3 that's damn near inevitable. Even the fact that I have a list of names pre-banned from my own Discord to keep our members safe is proof that it isn't as perfect as we wish it might be, but it is also good to recognise that every server I am active within has a good a safe community with rules and moderation that allow members to feel confident and comfortable there. It's the top thing I strive for in my own, to encourage our most creative people to let loose and enjoy the hyperfixation and spicy side without any concern for being judged or for their safety in the space. I think Tumblr is generally one of the brighter spaces, but it is certainly not perfect, so it is always good to be aware of that, of ourselves, of who we interact with and how we interact with them, and all of that community and self care. Not certain if that answers what you were looking for there or if this is more of a ramble again, I may be a little unfocused and tired~ ask box or inbox are very open to questions or clarifications or any other discussion really. I'm quite happy for people to get in touch with me however they wish~

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rockingrobin69 · 2 years

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Hey I just wanted to let you know that I absolutely love love love the way you write. Like it reminds me of why the world is so amazing and when Im done reading it's like the world has shifted to be a little brighter a little happier. Like its absolutely amazing the pace and adjectives and vibe like everything is so wonderful and tender and the relations you make between characters and objects and colours and scents is so vibrant. I'm new to Tumblr so still getting used to the whole reblog stuff but I wish we had a spam reblog button cause it would be really useful here. Anyway have a wonderful day. Thanks for putting ur writing out into the world.

Hi new friend, thank you so so much for this extremely kind message! I can't really tell you how much it means to me that you read my stories, that you find brightness in them - truly can't, it's pure magic. More than I could've asked for.

Have to admit I don't know what spam reblogging would entail (tumblr is as far as I go, social-media wise), but every reblog of an artwork is always appreciated (by every artist I've ever met!) Personally I always see every comment/tag added to reblogs, and they always make my day - thank you for that too!

I'm not the biggest expert, but if you have any questions about tumblr and our little corner of it, please feel free to reach out!

I'd like to give you a little gift back for your loveliness. So here goes, from a draft for flufftober (never posted):

This. Laundry and bins and the stupid leak and mold in the bathroom ceiling and dust, always so much dust, gathering and gathering. Cooking (and cooking and cooking. Breakfasts and lunches, treats for Ted and the gang, teas and suppers and midnight snacks. And Harry’s sweet tooth, and Ted’s allergies, and Molly-fricking-Weasley’s sacred recipes one can not veer from under pain of death! And all of it, all of it). Dentists and hoovering (dust again!) and throwing Harry’s tattered clothes when he wasn’t looking, getting him new boxers, damn it, without holes, fancy that. Did you know you have to clean inside the kettle? Did you know avocados are all liars, that cauliflower goes bad so fast, that some markers don’t come off the walls? Did you know you have to know all that, that no one tells you, that you have to notice and pay attention somehow to all of it, all the time?

Well, maybe you did. Draco didn’t. Doesn’t really know it still, even having lived it for years. Still surprised at how much he doesn’t know. At how hectic and breathless and quick it all is, how you have to stay on your toes, try to anticipate and fail miserably. How failing miserably can still be so sweet, how all of this is the life he couldn’t imagine, wouldn’t know how to dream up. Endlessly annoying and always surprising and so full of love he could choke. Write it down, please, dear diary: Draco Malfoy was a total sop in the most mundane of Mondays, with his head pounding and the to-do list chockful of endless chores. Taking Harry’s hand in the queue, sighing into the third cup of coffee. His life. Exhausting and nonstop and entirely his.

#Robin answers #Robin rambles #thank you so much new friend!#also:#drarry fic #little snippet anyway #soft - mundane

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mxbutchtwink · 2 years

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I've been thinking about my gender more often lately and I keep circling back to this post I saw YEARS ago when I first joined Tumblr (the gay website, as I suspected I was gay). I followed a lot of LGBT accounts and one of them had posted something from a mogai/xenogender account. It started off with a flag I had never seen before and unfortunately cannot remember any of the details about it, and went on to describe what the flag stood for. It was for a gender experience described as when someone, "Does not identity as being cisgender, but also does not identify as another gender" (roughly). I don't think anyone has quite understood me as much as that post.

The rest of the post was of course, people making fun of it. "Oh you're just a Cis person who doesn't like to be called Cis," or "Trenders just trying to steal resources," And so on and so forth, you know the whole transphobic waltz by now. I of course believed these things, any newfound joy or understanding of myself was crushed immediately as I learned what was right and what was wrong from internet discourse blogs. I was new to being gay, I didn't want to be one of the Bad Ones.

But still, years after this whole thing, I still think about it. If I could describe my gender I would say it's something similar to that. I am by no means cisgender, I don't feel at home performing or being perceived as the gender I was assigned at birth. But as far as transness goes, most people have an idea of what gender they are. It might change, sure, a trans woman might find out they're nonbinary later in life, I've seen butch lesbians become trans men become genderfluid people become stargender demifluxes, but there's always a name for that.

I don't think there's a name for what gender I am, I don't think it exists. That's not to say I don't have a gender, or that I want to coin a new name for one. I've already tried that, the label lasted about a week. When I think about the future I want for myself, I picture how things would be as a man or woman and it's dull. Not impossible, not unlivable, but unfulfilling and lackluster. Picturing myself as a nonbinary person makes it brighter, but not by much. Even genderfluidity, the label I've been using for a while now, doesn't give me what I need. None of these futures really make me happy.

I've found pronouns and clothes and a hairstyle and a presentation that make me happy. And though I'm not as far along as I'd like to be in my transition, the progress I've made makes me happy. I smile when I look in the mirror now. I've never really been good at putting things into words, but I think the more I try to dissect and label my gender, the more I miss out on being myself. Sometimes I call myself a man or a girl or nonbinary, in the long run it doesn't really matter to me. I am what I am, and what I am does not have a name. I am ok with that. I do not identify with my birth gender and I simply do not identify with anything else (nothing that's been described yet at least).

If any part of this resonates with you I would love to hear your experience, while navigating gender is not a new thing to me, I can't say I'd be good with advice. What I can offer is an open ear and a shoulder to lean on, please feel free to reach out to me. Thank you for reading my rambles.

#text post #trans #gender

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jerzwriter · 11 months

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Do you feel like we are seeing a lot more far-right bigotry on tumblr this year than we have during pride month in the past? I saw one post from this meme blogger called "r4cs0" where he was claiming that Chipotle had changed their corporate policies to ban homosexuals from their restaurants after a homosexual man was caught stealing guacamole by smuggling it out in his anus. It was definitely fake news and I think a lot of people were reblogging it because they thought it was a joke, but if you go to r4cs0's blog there is actually a huge amount of homophobia, transphobia, dendrophobia and general bigotry going on over there.

Hey Nonny,

I definitely feel it. This pride feels really off to me, and I don't like it. I am speaking from a U.S. perspective, but I know this applies to other nations as well. The anti-rhetoric is always there, but it feels more blatant like they're more empowered. That's been happening ever since 2016, but this year feels more intense.

My personal feelings? Roe v. Wade was overturned. Now, that in and of itself still has me on FIRE, but like I said on day one, Roe being overturned was not just about Roe, and the far-right has no intention of stopping there. Between that and the far-right media, they're emboldened and not letting down.

I even see it in things that, in general, I don't put too much stock in. Like Target's decision to remove their pride displays from certain stores in the South. Now, I never saw Target as the biggest ally, and I think a lot of corporate pride is BS propaganda, but this isn't good. Why? When I'm in lower Manhattan, it's not the kids there that need to know they're loved and supported... they know. This happened in the communities where they are most ostracized, the most in danger. It doesn't sit well with me.

Also, a lot of companies are putting out their pride logo for a day, then taking it down. Excuse me, but fuck you. America is not a democracy, no matter how much we like to pretend we are, in practice, we are very much a corporatocracy, and right now, we need corporations to be allies more than ever - for lgbtq+ rights, women's rights, racial equity - and so many are backing down instead of standing up - and that's not good. I'm looking hard at where I spend my money these days, and I think we should all try to do that.

Now the shit you are reporting here, I'd like to say anyone who sees that and believes it should have their heads examined, but in our crazy-ass climate, who the hell even knows what's real and what's not anymore (and that's QUITE by design). It's disgusting and disheartening, and it is dangerous.

I'm old enough that I remember when pride was a lot more than a party - and honestly, that has to be remembered, and we need to focus on that. It's great to celebrate, it's important to celebrate, and we should celebrate. But we have to stay vigilant, we have to fight, and for those of us fortunate enough to live in more progressive areas need to really remember those who don't and work for them.

Here's my only hope... the younger generation, in general, is progressive, so I hope the future will be brighter. But don't think the forces at play don't know that the younger generation is more progressive and these bigoted dinosaurs' days are numbered. That's why they're doing all they can - who cares if it's legal or ethical - to consolidate power.

It's hard to see all of this. I've lived through a lot and seen things improve so much. To see things moving backward is just sickening.

Stay strong, Nonny. Sending you love and HAPPY PRIDE... no matter what.

#pride #pride 2023 #🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈#asks answered

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