#that's literally the story of my entire life

[catboybiologist]

Oh hey since I mentioned sci hub again

I'd love to hear people's stories about small things that radicalized them in benign ways. I'll start.

I was already pretty leftist at this point, but being associated with academia so long means I've gotten free access to a variety of scientific journals, software, and more for... Basically my entire adult life. On campus, all of those systems have automatic logins. But off campus, usually there's janky, half-functional systems associated with actually inputting your credentials into these sites. Scientific journals especially are really and at tracking logins, and oftentimes have to link back to your uni's generic login page, which they're bad at pinging. Software installation usually requires

So instead of using services that the university had already paid for, for me to freely use, like adobe, journal logins, and Microsoft products, I started using free equivalents. Sci hub, gimp, libre office, Ubuntu... Not because I was invested in open source and free access mentalities at the time, but because they were literally quicker and simpler to use.

And then I started thinking about all of the little bits of tech infrastructure I was using to access my "free" stuff.

Someone coded those systems.

Some tiny portion of a server is devoted to handling those pings an login requests.

Someone spent hours upon days of work moving office 365 and adobe from actual pieces of software that fully live on your computer into stripped down versions of themselves that now have to verify

Someone made the payment system for Nature.

So. Much. Wasted. Labor. Just to block people from already existing services. That have alternatives. That are as good. For free. And they can be free largely because they don't have all of the bullshit associated with locking them down and keeping them proprietary.

Tech and science are of course what I have the most experience in, but I feel like once you start realizing that in one sector, you start seeing it everywhere.

Anyways this is a barely focused unmedicated ADHD ramble but I'd love to hear other examples

[vigilskeep]

i have never thought of the bg3 paths as railroaded before but oh my god... i see your vision. i think that, for all that can be picked apart in the writing of dragon age, the worldbuilding in that series is so so interested in complicating all factions that you can envision a character who /makes sense/ while bouncing through various ideologies. and the sort of fantasy writing in (most of) the forgotten realms doesn't really allow for that.

dao is particularly the light of my life because the origins mechanic is specifically intended to let you create a character who has a distinctive perspective on the world that’s grounded in the worldbuilding. one of my favourite aspects of this is several origins having completely different codex entries on their own culture as opposed to those an outsider would get. it’s really good! it’s also a reasonably grounded world (while obviously silly) because, like, the basic fundamental premise of thedas, from which they ikea flatpack built almost every feature, is “how would people react to magical and fantastical diversity? the same way they react to human diversity.” you’re meant to feel like, aside from i guess the darkspawn, people are normal and have real motivations. sure it has to fulfil certain roles in a story, and dragon age was manufactured too quickly and purposefully for everything to land feeling authentic, but evil in dragon age should feel recognisable. and in most of the origins they give you a chance to do something that is bad, but also totally makes sense, because of the context of your character belonging to this world where these things happen

in dnd/the forgotten realms it’s a bit different because capital e Evil exists, so there are people and deities and devils (and, to open another can of worms, races) whose entire goal is to Do Evil. it’s also harder to produce grounded evil because in a world where i’m being given basically no context and just told to make whatever i want, i don’t have an inch of the kind of social information i get from for example a dao origin: what my character has been taught to believe they should do to survive, who they are willing to sacrifice, whatever. bg3 also happens to have a main plot goal that is, at least for the first part of the game, broadly selfish (“i am sick, and i need a cure”) which works really well for getting a bunch of people with vastly differing moral standards to band together for the same goal, and not so good for any kind of “greater good” type blurred morality, so that’s out too

however much the worldbuilding factors into this, bg3 specifically went for quite a clear distinction between the good path and the capital e Evil Path, and i find it pretty hard to vary up the good path. when i say railroaded i mean you either do the specific thing that gets you a quest down the line or not. i was really disappointed actually in my playthrough where i totally fucked up in the druids’ grove and caused a fight to break out, because it immediately instakilled tons of characters i knew i would need down the line. the few it spared needed some of the dead ones to stay alive in later quests, so it’s like... oh. that’s just... over. for both factions. bg3 arguably lets you do basically anything you want but they are able to do that because if you fuck around it just breaks the entire quest line from coming up again, which means playing a character who fucks up is not even really going to get me consequences it’s just going to cut content from the game. does that make sense? and then the Evil Path is just straight up evil, like... there’s no way for me to complicate and empathise, here, especially playing a blank canvas character whose motivations i would have to make up from nothing, and who faces basically no consequences for not doing this. the only neutral/cowardly/self-interested option in act 1 is to do neither path, which gets me the least content because i literally don’t get to play the fucking game

i don’t know, i’m not saying it’s necessarily bad just that it’s hard for me, personally, and how i like to create characters. especially when you have my constant restart disease and you have to do this all over again a dozen times just for a handful of different dialogue. does any of that make sense

[stagefoureddiediaz]

ugh this is horrible news tommy is still around, hope to god he's gone in the finale. v

Maybe in your world Nonnie, but not in mine and I'm not entirely sure why you felt the need to come and complain about it on my blog, but here we are!

It makes perfect Narrative sense for Tommy to still be around in the back end of the season, and even possibly into the start of season 8. The show is telling a story of Bucks bisexuality, so why woould they get rid of Tommy so quickly? To do so would do a disservice to that story - a massive disservice. I'm guessing you're hating on this relationship becasue you see it getting in the way of Buddie, rather than viewing it as a vital step on the route to Buddie.

Lets put it into simple terms - Buck figures out he's bi and then begins to explore that newly discovered aspect of himself. The show has also taken the time to move Buck from someone who didn't really do relationships (of the long term variety), into someone who is looking for love and looking for forever. But in amongst all of that, he hasn't really had a healthy long term relationship, the closest he had to that was with Ali and that one didn't last especially long and she wasn't around for most of it

Buck isn't ready for an endgame queer relationship right now - he is still to immature from a relationship perspective - especially a queer relationship perspective. If Eddie was available and he and Buck got together - as they are as characters right now, they wouldn't last - they're not in a position to do so successfully. And this isn't me suggesting that they need to have figured everything out before they get together - to have fully healed etc, because thats neither realistic or something I would want to see - what it means is that they both need to get to a point where they are in a healthy enough place to put in the work together, understand each others flaws, and their own flaws and proactively work towards overcoming those things together and as of right now, neither of them are - they are getting their and moving rapidly in the right direction, but Buck needs to learn a bit more, and in many ways learn how to be with a man, before he will be ready to start anything with Eddie.

The growth we're getting to watch Buck go through right now - in the aftermath of the lightening strike, his reckoning with his mortality etc and the fact he's now off the hamster wheel and moving forward - in a healthy and faster way than we've ever seen from him, speaks volumes.

Tommy is also a far better developed love interest than any other love interest we've seen Buck (or indeed Eddie) with (Abby excepted but she was a main, so had her own purpose on the show)- I'm sure I'm not alone in feeling like I know Tommy more after 3 episodes plus what we got from the begins episodes he was in, than I managed to ascertain about Taylor or Ana or Nataila etc!

Not to mention, him figuring out he's in Love with Eddie as part of this process is going to be fun to watch. The show has made no bones about re-enforcing at every. Single. Opportunity how close, how entwined and how important Buck and Eddie are to one another - the show has quite literally been prioritising that over anything else Buck and Eddie related - Buck was there front and centre - placed very much on an equal footing with Shannon and even Eddie himself in 7x01, and then Eddie was the centre of Bucks bi arc in 7x04 and in his coming out in 7x05. They are literally moving chess pieces into place to tell an amazing story of queer love in later life and creating an epic slow burn for the ages.

And finally, Eddie is, as far as we know at this point in time, still in a relationship with Marisol - why shouldn't Buck get to explore who he is and what he want's within a relationship rather than sitting pining on the sidelines - that isn't healthy in any way shape or form. Eddie still has stuff to figure out about himself.

Even Tim and Oliver have stated in interviews that this is about a happy and joyful queer experience of figuring out bisexuality and therefore within that is giving the narrative a romcom vibe. But they have also stated that Tommy isn't going to be around for that long - that he is very much a narrative device.

It is worth pointing out that timelines on various aspects of the narrative may have been shifted because of the season 8 renewal - but that is only going to help tell the story because now it doesn't have to be rushed. I'm still fully expecting some form of feeling realisation from one of them by the end of the season (my money is on Buck), setting up for season 8 and Buddie going canon either 8a finale or early into 8b.

You have every right to dislike Tommy if thats you jam - have at it, but don't come to my blog and expect me to agree with you. I'm not a multi shipper by any means - I'm a one ship kind of gal and I will be a Buddie shipper until the end of time, but within that, I am here for amazing storytelling and amazing queer storytelling - the like of which I've not had the privilege to watch on my screen before - especially one that hits so close to home. Its a really important story to tell and I'd rather it not be rushed.

And if you had to pick - I'm pretty sure you'd rather have Tommy around for a bit longer that Marisol!!!!

#kym answers things #nonnie asks #We love Tommy on this blog so don't come to my inbox trying to spread hate! #I get not wanting to see half of your ship with anyone other than the other half of it I really do but to deny the narrative thats going to #get you to canon is just a fools errand - its precisely because of that narrative that will make the ship going canon all the more rewardin #911 spoilers #evan buckley #eddie diaz #buddie #bucktommy #kinley #tevan #911 abc #911 discourse

[cosmerelists]

Cosmere Protagonists Who Would Support the Villain...of Other Cosmere Planets

As requested by @asteroidfieldgame :)

Sure, in their own stories the villains are not well-liked by the majority of the cast. But if we took those villains and had them meet protagonists of other Cosmere novels...well, then it might be different, mightn't it?

[Here there be spoilers! I would skip any entry if you're not caught up on all the books for both characters involved!]

1. Moash: Supported by Kelsier

Kelsier: [holding Moash protectively ala that one meme with Kevin Hart] Kelsier: My boy Moash has LITERALLY never done anything wrong ever! Kelsier: Ooooh, did he kill his oppressors? Is he mean to poor helpless nobility? Did someone Rich experience a Consequence? Moash: (mumbling) I did try to drive my friend to suicide. Kelsier: Shh...baby boy, it's okay! Kelsier: I made my disciple advocate for old people to kill themselves with spikes to preserve their power! Kelsier: You're literally fine.

2. Odium: Supported by Harmony

Harmony: Listen, I'm not saying I agree with everything Odium does. Harmony: But making it so that you have a planet of mighty, battle-hardened residents to prepare for the coming Cosmere-wide conflict? Harmony: Sometimes I wonder if I should have done something more like that. Harmony: Instead of giving everyone an easy life and making giraffes because giraffes are neat. Odium: Have you considered...battle giraffes? Harmony: Please don't patronize me.

3. Hrathen: Supported by Ellista (that one Ardent who was really into romance novels)

Ellista: I am not immune to a handsome man in bloodred armor with a troubled past whose hard, mean exterior is slowly worn away through love. Ellista: A man who chooses love--unrequited love!--over his own god! Ellista: Problematic for an Ardent like me, but so, so compelling. Ellista: (sighs dreamily) Hrathen: ... Hrathen: Could I have someone else's support please?

4. Riina [from Tress]: Supported by Wayne

Wayne (counting off reasons on his fingers): One, if you're gonna be the sort to be giving out curses, giving out breakable curses makes you less of an unforgivable villain and more of a garden-variety dick. Wayne: Two, rats are cute. Makin' someone a rat is better 'n' making them a grub or something. Wayne: Three, and most importantly, her penis spaceship is hilarious. Riina: IT WAS NOT A PENIS SPACESHIP

5. The Lord Ruler: Supported by Dalinar

Dalinar: I suppose I am simply more aware than most that being a king is hard and can involve less-than-ideal-choices. Dalinar: And didn't he essentially become immortal while trying to cage an evil god and save his planet? I am literally setting myself up to maybe experience that as we speak. Dalinar: I know he took an entire population and made them slaves, but I did tell Jasnah not to free our slaves so, like... Dalinar: ... Dalinar: Maybe Wit was right. Maybe I AM a tyrant. Wit: You've never done an enforced breeding program with humans, though. That I know of. The Lord Ruler did that! Like, a lot! Dalinar: ... Dalinar: Wait I want to mitigate my support a little.

6. Taravangian: Supported by Shai

Shai: That Diagram of his...well, it's pure art, isn't it? Shai: I'm not immune to the appeal of incredibly complex and well-researched plans turned into an artistic representation so beautiful that it attracts worshippers. Taravangian: It's really more science than it is art, I'd say. Shai: Hilarious that you think those things are different.

7. Nale: Supported by Marasi

Marasi: He knows the law and follows the law. Marasi: Don't think it would ever occur to him that someone could be quote unquote "above" the law. Marasi: That makes him better than, like, quite a lot of my coworkers.

8. The Machine [from Yumi and the Nightmare Painter]: Supported by Vasher

Vasher: Obviously a soul-eating machine that nearly destroys a planet and turns people into nightmares is not ideal. Vasher: But it's not the machine's fault it was given an ill-considered Command. Vasher: Hey! Bald guy! Wanna gentle-parent the machine too? Szeth: Uh

9. Raboniel: Supported by Elend

Elend: Not for nothing am I chair of the Support Women's Wrongs fanclub. Elend: Nor can I fail to support a Woman in Science. Basic feminism. Elend: And although I know my bar is on floor, a parent who will do anything to save their child from eternal suffering gets me right here. (points to his heart)

10. Straff: Supported by...no one

Straff: ... Straff: ... Straff: OH COME ON

#cosmere #cosmerelists #Nale; Taravangian; and Straff entries suggested by requester! #Moash #Kelsier #Taravangian #Shai #Straff #elend #Raboniel #Nale #Marasi #Lord Ruler #Dalinar #Wayne #Riina #Ellista #Hrathen #Harmony #Odium

[seventh-fantasy]

top 5 dihua moments

HELLO ohhh goddd if i really really really have to pick... I'LL TRY (in tears)

in chronological order of the episodes:

(1) “你这个人最大的弱点就是喜欢当英雄。一个剑客不该有弱点。” your greatest weakness is that you like being a hero. a swordsman should be without weaknesses. (ep 1)

i'm as in love with the entire donghai scene as much as the next person but this dialogue is particularly special to me. so it was the first one i pinned down for this list. no hesitation. :)

it's a cornerstone of dihua's relationship; the thesis of lxy/llh's and their joint narrative. it prompts the deconstruction of the staple wuxia ideas of 侠 xia and heroism - which is what i really love lhl for. and dfs being the one to deliver this incredibly crucial and significant line is 10/10. he knew lxy even better than lxy did. he is the bearer and catalyst of lhl's story, lxy/llh's story.

"your greatest weakness is that you like being a hero. a swordsman should be without weaknesses." so what does it even mean to be a hero. is it more important to be a hero than being human. and i will become human. i am human and always have been. and i have weaknesses - i cannot win against fate, i am dying. but what ever is even wrong with being weak? being human is to have weaknesses. so i guess it's no wonder for the narrative to come in a full circle with dfs coming in possession of a weakness and be trapped in it. no longer the killer of di fortress. he's just a human being.

and llh bringing this up again in ep 11 feels to me that he had been carrying these words with him over the past 10 years. bicha and the battle have transformed him physically. but i like to think that dfs's words had an important role to play in an even deeper level of change.

all it took was this one scene to sell to me that this would probably be the kind of narrative i love.

(2) reunion in the woods (ep 8)

it's just so fucking good like literally every dihua scene. who doesn't love a good post-divorce first meeting scene. there's just a lot to chew on. most of all, llh just had to keep reminding dfs how well he knew dfs. we know the moon has always been this bright, alright. AND they were threatening each other. very sexy of them.

(3) whatever the heck was going between them in cailianzhuang arc (ep 11)

truly nothing brings out old married couple + parents vibes better than an inquisitive boy accusing you two of being up to something secretive behind his back. both their guilty expressions. :3 also dfs being the first person huahua goes to when he doesn't want to be alone. huahua being exceptionally chatty around dfs and dfs has no problem entertaining him. :3 they're totally on the same wavelength without having to say anything to each other and this arc brings it out so well.

(4) 腊月二十七 donghai anniversary wedding night (ep 38)

this is the last one i came up for the list after fighting a whole war in my mind over which 5 of the 100000 beloved scenes to pick. hate being predictable but. you just HAVE to give it to it. how do you NOT pick this for a top 5. all the 10 million other top 5 dihua scenes just had to make space for the anniversary scene. :'(

if i had to be even more specific, i think the scene of them in bed most likely takes the cake for me. llh literally saved dfs's life and helped him to become the stronger person he has always wanted to be. and perhaps no other moment exhibits the complementary yin and yang nature of their powers/energies in a more illustrative and palpable way. undershirts in bed just hits different from being fully clothed and one person literally having to keep the other person alive by touch...and this time it's llh for dfs despite the whole time it's dfs who was dedicated to keep llh alive. they have no lack of scenes that exhibit how in sync they are intellectually, and this is peak physical intimacy and tenderness, added with a brush with death/mortality yeah...

(5) llh/lxy's farewell to dfs (ep 40)

playing cheat here by combining two different moments :) but they are essentially connected. llh/lxy had to leave. and since it really had to be that way, i'm glad dfs was on his mind until the very end. what more can one ask for. there is really nothing more dear and tender in the world to be thought of

-

tl;dr: /blows kisses to every dihua moment

#anon idk why u did this to me but i love you. and thank you for the ask <3 my head exploded from doing the curation exercise <3 #i also have a couple of other specific scenes i wanted to call out but there's just no more room sighs #idk my answers are leaning mostly to the earlier arcs also bc those are the ones ive been rewatching most lately. #come back in 2 months maybe lmao. repeat until every dihua scene is listed lol #莲花楼 #mysterious lotus casebook #lhl #dihua #my posts #asks #anon

[justanothermarauderr]

did i just went on a 10+ minutes tangent about regulus black and james potter love story and how they are so beautifully tragic on tiktok? yes

did i also explain why i will always defend them with my entire being, drunk? yes

bcs you cant say that whenever you read about about them it’s always

regulus black loves first and james potter fell harder and harder every time

they are so beautifully tragic and yes in some ff they do make it to the end. and yes they live a happy life but the most tragic ones ???????

regulus black doing everything he does just so james ( and by extension his brother ) could go on and live a happy life even if it wasn’t him??? y’all…

i will forever defend them till my lasting breath bcs i feel what regulus felt when he went into that cave

i feel his heartbreak and his hope for james, the only person he had ever loved beside his brother, to live a happy life. even if it was not with him.

regulus black had loved james potter to the point that he would be willing to sacrifice his life to be sure that james potter, his love , his life, his literal light at the end of the fckn tunnel that was tainted with the black families idiocy of following a man that wanted genocide, to have a happy and filled life.

even if it wasn’t with him.

i will forever love their stories that was picked and wrote.

the grumpy slytherin who followed his families ideals but to only be torn by a gryffindor who showed him what actually loving someone with no expectation can be and to ensure that no harm to was to come to their light.

I read somewhere that said and i quote

“ regulus black was a boy who walk like they are made of stone but his touch was like the sun”

james potter had said that in many and multiple times and ff’s

james potter was the sun and regulus black was like a stone

but to james, regulus was like a summers warmth open and warm with every touch he had made.

james potter was seen as the sun. but he would tell you otherwise if he had the chance.

regulus black was a boy who walked like he was made of stone but if james potter were to be in his orbit, his touch was like the sun. coursing through james’ veins; melting away the very expectation people wanted him to be.

regulus had rarely open to people who he finds ( and in his words) tolerable

barty crouch jr.

evan and pandora rosier

dorcas meadows

and his brother, sirius black

those were the people that knew him best.

but for him to open up to someone to, james potter

of all people

he loved his friends and brother in a familial way

it has said a lot about how regulus black love

but james

james was different

james, who loved and wouldn’t be ashamed to declared it was very much unfamiliar

regulus black loved james potter as soon as he realize that it wasn’t the same to those he was close

it altered how he viewed love and how it differentiate between them

and james

oh but james.

he loved who he loves.

It’s simple as that

but with regulus it was different

sure he serenaded lily evans but still

when james potter saw regulus black as more then his best friends little brother it

in a way

clicked

regulus black made sense to him.

he was perfect to james. regulus told him it was okay to let go. to not be held in a metaphorical pedestal everyone had put him in.

it made sense to james potter that regulus black was THE ONE.

bcs who in his life ever told him it was okay to let go and feel what he felt in that moment and breakdown bcs of what people see him as

the loving gryffindor golden boy who had no doubt towards anyone who deams worthy of the potter heirs kindness

but to regulus it wasn’t that.

he SAW what james had to put up too

the prank

cant find it his heart to hate sirius who he sees as a brother

It was hard

but the moment james was alone with regulus, the only one who see right through him, he broke.

and it says a lot more then anything.

james potter had trusted regulus enough to shed his golden boy skin and told him what he was feeling and how he was disappointed and hurt by the way sirus went about everything with snape

ofc it didn’t resonate with him like remus had felt but it still hurt nonetheless.

to not see his best friend and in his place, a unfamiliar boy who was consumed by the madness bcs of his family

it hurt james.

BUT it was regulus he seeked first

it was regulus black that told him to let go and say what he wanted to say

and i find that so beautiful that even though they saw things that put them in different sides of the war

that they somehow, and so beautifully, able to understand one another and what the other need

can you tell I’m drunk 😭

#hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry #marauders era #jegulus #marauders #regulus black #ao3 #james potter #the prank #beautifully tragic

[olderthannetfic]

https://www.tumblr.com/olderthannetfic/748698755825582080/since-weve-been-on-the-same-topic-for-quite-some?source=share

This bothers the hell out of me too! Its gotten to the point where I'm in the process of writing a fic where a character gets bottom surgery because of so tired of there being literally no representation for it. Getting bottom surgery doesn't erase stigma around someone being trans and it doesn't erase the hardships, discrimination, and dysphoria someone can deal with. Like, it is very possible to write interesting compeling stories about trans characters about their trans identities while they are post bottom surgery, I promise its very possible.

The lack of good trans stories iritates me, which yeah "be the change you want to see in the world" I am doing that. I'm writing and have written trans stories because the ones we do get are vast majority just porn. Porn is good, but my entire life isn't a porn category, we have layers outside of that.

--

[lurkingshan]

Your list of ride or die couples is iconic and has so many of my faves, flower of evil bad buddy it's okay that's love lighter and princess one spring night like yes give me a show where the entire story is two individuals willing to take on the world together and for each other, it's my favorite dynamic and we don't get a lot of it especially in heterosexual couples. You have amazing taste and I would take any other suggestions you have of the same dynamic.

Hi anon! Thank you for the kind words, I do agree that I have amazing taste. :) The Ride or Die list is specifically about drama couples who we get to see be in a confirmed romantic relationship for at least half of the drama's run, with their relationship development the primary focus of the plot. I think of them as battle couples; they face challenges together and stay loyal even when they struggle. There actually are not that many of these in dramaland, which is why they are so precious to me and why I hold them close.

That said, since I wrote that post I do think we have gotten a few more entries for the list, so here are some additional recs for you:

Won and Sarang, King the Land

(S Korea, Netflix)

It was getting salty about fan reaction to this show that inspired the Ride or Die list in the first place, and I am happy to report that when it finished its run, these two were still a rock solid couple. This drama is entirely about their relationship and we get lots of time with them as an established couple getting to know each other and settling into a great relationship. I love it and will stab anyone who says it's boring.

Ten and Prem, Cooking Crush

(Thailand, YouTube)

Ten and Prem, my beloveds! These two meet, start liking each other, and move into dating in relatively short order, and the back half of the show has them navigating a slew of external conflicts that would normally result in a lot of breakups and false starts. But not for them! They slay every relationship demon via the power of communication.

Maki and Haruta, Ossan's Love Returns

(Japan, Gagaoolala)

This one comes with a caveat that this is technically a sequel season, and the first one would very much not qualify them for this list. But you don't have to watch that first season if you don't want to, and in this return they are a couple the entire time and there is just so much time spent on them navigating their relationship and facing every day life challenges. They're an extremely charming pair.

Yuanzhou and Ruyi, A Journey to Love

(China, iQIYI)

The most literal battle couple on this list, we have ourselves an assassin and spy master pair here. They meet, she decides he's the perfect baby daddy specimen, and a hilarious pursuit begins. These two get together remarkably early for a cdrama and face just so many trials and tribulations, phew. But they face them together in their color coded costumes and look amazing doing it. CW: the plot is basically about them and a band of buds leading a suicide mission so, uh, there will be many deaths, and their ending can be read as ambiguous but IMO is actually quite a happily ever after in context.

Achi and Karan, Cherry Magic Thailand

(Thailand, Viu)

Karan and Achi are so into each other it's embarrassing, and we get to see them build and deepen and maintain their relationship every step of the way. This one is a little harder to watch--you will need a VPN if you're not in Thailand--but so worth the effort, trust me. And you may recognize this actor pair from the main list, because they are in fact the same beautiful faces behind Pete and Kao of Dark Blue Kiss. Congratulations to Tay Tawan and New Thitipoom for being the only actors who have achieved the honor of making the coveted Ride or Die list twice.

#king the land #cooking crush #ossan's love returns #a journey to love #cherry magic th #shan recommends #shan answers

[hddlestn]

i am losing my goddamn mind. i spent all of saturday (i had twelve fucking hours of screentime because of this) (today is monday) reading this wonderful fanfic that i could not turn my eyes away from. it changed my life, it's truly one of the best things i have ever had the privilege of reading. i wasn't finished yet though, so i just laid down in my bed to continue only to find it literally disappearing as i was reading it. it doesn't say it's deleted, just that it's a "mystery work", however, when you click on the author's page it says that they don't have any works at all.

i literally felt my entire body go numb and i am still shaking as i type this. i know fanfic authors do not owe us anything, especially since they share their talents out of the goodness of their hearts. but this has just completely shaken me. i had the best time of my life reading this story, i genuinely cannot even put into words just how much i loved it and how much it meant to me. and it's fucking gone, disappeared in the blink of an eye.

the story is called Signatures of all Things by nadyenka. if anybody knows anything about what could have possibly happened, please please please let me know.

#sirius black #sirius black fanfic #nadyenka #signatures of all things #harry potter #harry potter fanfic #marauders #remus lupin #wolfstar #i didn't even download it because the author literally still updated on saturday #therefore i assumed it's an ongoing and very much ALIVE work #i am crying nothing has ever moved me as profoundly as this fic has and now it's gone #please if anybody knows anything

[galactikburzt]

Truth be told i would really love to be a standup comedian

I think we actually do need more comedians in the world

#finley's evil monologues #i actually do feel comfortable at talking in public in a crowd or being in a scenario in front of a public in general #and i guess humor also has been a big part of my life as well 👍 it's a very great coping mechanism #and a good way to make others happy #so yeah its a win win #“but magpie being a stundup comedian is actually a very hard and exhaust-”SHHHHHHHHHHH SHH- SHH- SHH- SHH- #It's LITERALLY just autistic masking but you get paid for it #taking in a crowd #analize the crowd to figure out how to make the people like you #make a conscious decision about *everything* you do to make people laugh from the way you talk to the way you move #figure out what works best to get people's validation #that's literally the story of my entire life #and you're fucking telling me i could actually get paid for all of that??? sign me the FUCK into that shit because hell yeah #i cant believe i have been doing all of that for free through my entire life #where's my money smh /j #ehehe #ive actually been looking into hunting for advice from other standup comedians out there in the internet #and well #all jokes aside (no pun intended) i think im gonna actually consider it #because again #i think the world does need more comedians in it

[obiiow]

I know the whole thing with eren growing his hair out was because he just didn’t care anymore but I like to think it’s because his mom always told him his ears turn red when he lies and he was about to spend the rest of his life lying to everyone he loved 🥹

#aot #attack on titan #eren yeager #eren jaeger #I’m still both in love with this story and pissed as hell that this boy had to go through all of this alone #he spent his entire life being told his life was only worth all of the death around him if he freed paradis #he was a literal child soldier conditioned to do horrible things just like the warriors and he gave up everything he valued #just at the slight chance his friends could live #god doomed characters just rip at my heartstrings

[kagoutiss]

oot zelda doodle i liked :’-)))

#tloz #ocarina of time #oot #zelda #my handwriting is very very bad so i actually added alt text/image description #which i should already be doing with everything anyway. i wanna go thru and update some old stuff with that too #but yeah anyway. all the stuff this series presents about being Fated To Be Something or Fated To End Up Somewhere #even if that thing or place is ultimately Horrible and the consequences primarily occur off camera or post-canon after the Happy Ending #characters who end the story with pretty much nothing and also you find out later they inadvertently cause a far worse disaster #than even the one they gave up everything to prevent #oot zelda’s infinite number of issues and almost guaranteed lack of happiness or normality for the rest of her life #even after ‘fixing everything’ in literally the best possible way she could figure out how. given everything she knew #and then blaming herself for accidentally allowing everything to go wrong in the first place. by trying to fix it #and she was literally just a kid going insane from prophetic visions while simultaneously being disbelieved by everyone around her #except impa but she’s a whole other situation entirely. with a whole other set of baggage on the other end of the spectrum #i just rambled sos so much oops. anyway yea oot zelda #its fine. i throw up when i think about her. its fine

[clowndensation]

louis, lestat, and their single bed as a motif louis puts into his own story, but refuses to explore, is literally one of the sexiest parts of the show. it speaks volumes about a level of fulfillment and freedom that louis feels by being with lestat that he rarely explicitly comments on when he's relaying his story to daniel, which feels extremely relevant to his overall reluctance to examine the parts of his relationship with lestat that he really enjoyed.

because louis is a character who's hyper aware of how he presents himself. he's lived his entire life projecting a certain masculine, heteronormative image, and he's aware of how deviating from that presentation has implications that impact how people view him - from enjoying the opera, to the presentation of his nails. the fact that he moves in with lestat and neither of them ever put a second bed into any room in the house as a level of plausible deniability is so huge and oversight by so cautious a character, it can only be read as deliberate - especially when the conspicuous lack of a second bed is pointed out to them by both antoinette and a literal police officer. in an existence where you don't sleep in a bed, the bed becomes a symbolic object more so than a practical one. it's louis choosing to deliberately transgress against the societal expectations he lives out when he leaves his house, a bit of presentation that actually amplifies his truth as a gay man living with his partner, rather than masking or hiding himself, like he does for the outside world.

#literally imagine the satisfaction and euphoria in having one place where you can purposely present yourself as gay #where you can look at your own personal space and go 'it looks like a gay man lives here' and feel safe and accepted in that #i feel similarly about the way lestat touches louis tbh #especially as viewed through claudia's diaries #there's an openness to the way louis and lestat behave around each other that their status (of being rich and being vampires) #grants them that louis hasn't really gotten the chance to explore before #and they still can't be blatant about their queerness obviously #but they get away with significantly more than louis has ever allowed himself in his human life #there is an incredible amount of relief and joy in having a partner who isn't ashamed to touch you #and you can see louis feel that #it's one of my favorite pieces of the narrative threaded through the entire story #rarely commented on but still blatant for how encompassing queer love can be #iwtv

[orchid-n-petals]

So I've already shared parts of this on a discord server, but I have to scream about Ketheric Thorm on here as well. Obviously spoilers about the character under the cut! It's a long one.

The entirety of act 2 is about him, right? Jaheira, Shadowheart and numerous other NPCs shit on him for his fickle faith. First Selune, then Shar, then, as we meet him, Myrkul. You hear about his changes of faith on a whim, you hear that he's the person responsible for the shadow curse, he is painted as a villain, plain and simple.

You can figure it out pretty early on that Isobel was resurrected and that she is his daughter; the detail as well that he wants Isobel alive is so on the nose, it gives him away completely but there are still a few questions that remain unanswered, mainly about his faith.

And then you get to the mausoleum and the picture assembles; this entire tragedy, the death of hundreds if not thousands and the complete ruination of a landscape was all, ALL because you had this absolutely wrenched, heartbroken father who had lost everything and nobody answered his grief. He was left woefully alone, the Goddess whose daughter his daughter was involved with did nothing to save Isobel.

Imagine outliving your wife and your daughter. Imagine dedicating your life to fight the Lady of Loss, your Lady of Silver's enemy, and then be left so completely alone and in silence with your grief, with your loss. It's so, so poetic how and why he turned from Selune, and it's so understandable as well; he broke. His spirit completely broke. He couldn't deal with that void of having lost the only two important people in his life, seemingly undeservedly so. He was going mad with this and a lot of his ire was likely targeted at Aylin who, in his eye, represented Selune; she's literally her daughter, after all, and it was implied that even before the deaths of his family, he sort of saw Aylin courting Isobel as Selune taking his daughter from him, despite his service. This relationship was clearly not seen by him as a boon of "giving his daughter to the Moon-maiden".

His ways in the past clearly didn't spare him from tragedy and having to cope with it (which he clearly didn't, he snapped under the weight of his grief). He was clearly angry and unable to do anything, furious and helpless, which is a dangerous combination. A good part of his first change of heart must have been fuelled by a sense of revenge.

But then Shar didn't provide any balm to his aching heart either. If you read his letters in Grymforge and in act 2, he is so focused on enacting the will of Shar because he believes that healing lies in oblivion. Everything would be easier if he could just forget, if the damn world could just forget, if nothing was remembered because without Melodia and Isobel, nothing was worth remembering.

Then came Myrkul. Literally the only god who was not only able, but WILLING to give back his daughter to him. Imagine spending your all, EVERYTHING you have to serve two gods who would not give a single shit about the greatest suffering in your life. You were basically nothing, your loyalty didn't matter for shit, everything that was taken from you amounted to no recognition whatsoever: you should simply cope and seethe. Your grief will not simply go unanswered (which is not inherently antagonising) but ignored.

And then comes this supposedly evil entity who can alleviate your pain just like that, snap of a finger and it's a done deal.

I am so serious when I say that I believe Ketheric's main incentive was to extend Aylin's immortality to Isobel as well. You can read in her diary that she feels a taint after having came back, and there are things not even Selune can cleanse, but at this point, Ketheric doesn't care about Selune, vengeance is secondary if not tertiary, he's done that war during his Shar years and what did it give him? Literally nothing.

He doesn't even care about the fact that Isobel is still her cleric. He cares about the single most important fact: Isobel is back. Life is worth living again, there is something for him, and it was not Selune or Shar who gave it to him but Myrkul, and for this singular gift, he would raze the world for the Lord of Bones. Like people can clown on him for being disloyal but the man has the loyalty of a dog bonded to its owner.

He is powerful and is willing to go to insane lengths for crumbs. What is raising a single life for a god? Nothing. It has happened and it will happen again. But Ketheric will go to the ends of the earth to serve the single god who actually listened to him. The one god who didn't ignore him.

He knows that what he does is not the morally upright thing! He is so insanely self-aware that allying with Orin and Gortash and doing this entire plot with them only to then betray them is morally reprehensible at the best of times, he knows that people hate him, etc-etc. He was a Selunite at one point and he's not stupid. He just doesn't care; it could be literal Asmodeus and he wouldn't care as long as he got what he wanted, no matter the price.

He is probably the only one from the three of the chosen who has complete clarity over his situation, he almost sways (if you pass the check during his confrontation), he is not an inherently evil man blinded by power.

But he is inherently loyal to those deserving, and as of the story's standing, completely broken by his grief. In his eyes, at this point, the only one deserving loyalty is the one who actually listened to him. Isobel lives. It doesn't matter that she hates him, that his entire life has fallen apart, that literally nothing else that is good has come of it, because Isobel lives.

I don't think he regrets a single thing. His consciousness might tear at him at the end, but I believe he would do everything over again, exactly as he did, because in the end, his daughter was brought back. Because what would a grieving, broken parent give to bring back their child? Everything. Absolutely everything. And it's such a simply given answer, no second thoughts, no doubts.

Nobody can tell me that this man is fickle. Nobody. This man was willing to burn the world to the ground, create a Boudica destruction layer all by himself for the one single thing he wanted. For any God that would listen.

I don't know, I just have a lot of thoughts about his character.

#bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #ketheric thorm #and I also have a lot of thoughts of how Aylin foils him #I fully believe that he was in the right in the capacity that he switched around his gods when he was literally ignored despite his life's #work. despite all that he has given. I think it's reasonable to expect in the world of gods who actively meddle in mortal affairs on their #whims and make shit worse that in just one single case they would. idk. NOT expect one of their devotees to remain blindly loyal to them #after their prayers go unanswered. like yes; go and try your luck elsewhere because this devotion of yours is clearly being taken for #granted. you get NOTHING out of your worship. you can't even sleep well because your loved ones are dead and you are expected to just what? #deal with it on your own? and remain loyal? why? #some sense of 'honour'? #I really like this depiction of faith actually. I really like when clerics and paladins are given agency and critical thought that hey! #this is actually giving me nothing despite me dedicating my entire life to it! and I have only one of it so why not take it somewhere where #it's actually valued. you know. as a treat. #I *personally* much more prefer this depiction of a crisis of faith than what we got with Shadowheart or Lae'zel; their stories are very #interesting on their own but I think throwing yourself from one end to the other not because you actually have a goal that it could serve #but because you are desperate for a purpose #is a slightly less potent character narrative than having an actual goal yourself. not by much but by a little. #again #PERSONALLY

[bonefall]

NEVER STOP!!! everytime I get mad over DOTC I just come onto your page and read your Gray Wing slander and immediately feel better, thanks muchly! 😌✨️

I am but a humble DOTC Slander ranger, riding across the sunlit horizon with a big iron on my hip, putting every hater's formless frustration into the words you felt but did not realize how to say ✨️

#If there's anything positive to say about it #it's that it's at least a SPECTACULAR kind of bad #It's bad in the kind of way that makes you realize what is so bad about other entries in WC #Like the rosetta stone of things wrong with WC #In no other arc is the ableism misogyny and abuse apologia SO apparent. SO plain to see #And of course your mind's immediately drawn to Clear or Tom because they're so obviously awful as characters. #But even the characters they think are GOOD and frame as RIGHTEOUS are revealing!! #Sometimes even moreso!! #though to be clear I end up biting at Gray a lot more often than Clear because he's awful in a less immediately obvious way #but I think clear is literally THE worst character they have ever put in WC. It's not a contest. It's not even a consideration in my mind. #because at the end of the day. Clear is WHY the arc is so bad. #Gray is defending him and doing a shit ton of abuse apologia and generally being insufferable #but as a tool he is being used in the exact way they mean to use him. #And his USE is to SUPPORT CLEAR. #He may not be the main POV but the arc is ABOUT Clear. It's HIS story. EVERYTHING that happens is supposed to be for HIM. #I haven't gotten to Gray's death scene in my reread yet but I should actually reblog it over here on the main when I do #Because it says it. It says it explicitly. That Gray only ever did anything because Clear pushed or bullied him to action. #And the narrative tries to frame that like a sweet and sentimental thing #But it's actually fucking horrifying. That WAS the entire series. #Clear pushing and bullying others until life was worse for everyone. And then they thank him for it. #bone babble #dotc hate

[thwackk]

i demand your arts

here u can have this one single piece of fanart i made for the fanfic that literally ruined my entire life

#the little house on the prairie halbarry… #if you know you know #halbarry #hal jordan #barry allen #kyle rayner #guy gardner #they r fuckin silly and nothing bad happens in the story i promise. everything is fine forever :) #i gotta be so honest right now that shit is the best thing i’ve ever read in my entire life i am so completely dead serious you dont even kn #i would do horrible ungodly things to farmer barry #what. sorry the demons won #okay honestly i could gush abt this fanfic for literal days it’s not funny i could make like a whole powerpoint abt it it’s been driving me #absolutely crazy please help me #im so normal abt it #my art lol #the absolute grip this shit still has on me… i’ll never get over it