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#that's a drawing of Light's back by the way. might post it eventually...

raz-writes-the-thing · 6 months

Text

Best of Friends With A Little Extra (Doctor Who)

Tenth Doctor x GN!Reader 18+ ONLY / requests are open and encouraged

Summary: Based on the prompt: “People who’re just friends don’t do shit like this, and you know it.”

CW: smut (gn), hair pulling, back scratching, friends with benefits (but not really- they're in love), fluff

Doctor Who tag list: @nyxiethesimp @quickslvxrr (send an ask to be added to a tag list!)

___ ___ ___ ___ ___

“People who’re just friends don’t do shit like this and you know it,” you pant into the Doctor’s ear.

“Oh, come on- I thought we were the best of friends, darling-” he breaks off into a moan, eyes clenching shut as you contract your muscles around him. His arms are almost shaking as he holds himself above you. He relaxes them, propping himself up on his elbows to press hot open-mouthed kisses to your lips. “Best- oh- best friends.”

You rake your nails down his back and delight in the way he moans, cock twitching inside you with pleasure. He always did like a little bit of pain with his pleasure, your Doctor.

“We are- ngh- best friends, dear,” you moan out, rocking your hips to meet his thrusts. You reach out to yank on his pretty hair. The Doctor’s head tilts to the side and you see the pink flush crawling up his skin. “But we’re more than that and you know it.”

The Doctor breaks out into a cheeky grin, giving you a particularly hard thrust that causes your hand to fall from his hair and cover your mouth to keep the escaping yelp in.

“Perhaps,” the Doctor acquiesces, beginning to thrust faster, chasing his orgasm. He nips at your jaw playfully. “But- oh- sh-hit, you feel good- uh, uh, where was I?”

You can’t help the laugh that bubbles from your chest, though it draws out into a moan as the Doctor leans up, grabs your hips tightly with both hands and drives his cock inside you as far as he can, sinking in until you’re worried you might burst with the fullness.

“You- oh, fuck- um, were saying per-perhaps,” you managed to grunt out, pleasure swirling in your gut as you grew closer and closer to your edge.

“Oh yes, that’s right,” the Doctor pants, giving your thigh a little pat before going back to gripping at your hip. You think there might be light bruises there by the time he’s done, and you cannot wait to admire them later. “Best friends- but you’re right- best- ngh- fr-friends don’t screw each other’s brains out on the- fu-huck- TARDIS floor, do they?”

You shake your head, biting down on your lip as you feel the Doctor’s hips start to stutter. He’s close. You are too.

“B-brilliant,” he grins, but the expression morphs into a pleasured ‘o’ as you clench particularly tightly around him. “You’re brilliant, you are.”

Your thighs are shaking around his hips now, the pleasure growing sharper and sharper. You roll your hips back against him and he lets out the most delicious moan that makes your core tighten that little bit more. God, you’re gonna-

“So tight,” he groans. “Cum for me, please? Please- please-”

That does it for you, hearing him plead for your release so desperately. Your pleasure crescendos, tight ripples of blinding satisfaction spread from your hole as the Doctor cries out, ropes of thick cum exploding inside you. You feel him filling you up, and it only serves to heighten your sensitivity. You grapple to hold onto him as your entire body shakes with pleasure. The Doctor’s hips are stuttering into you erratically, slowing down until he eventually stills inside you, leaning down to wrap you up in his arms.

You’re still twitching, the endorphins taking root in your system and giving you that happy post-sex glow that you love so much.

“There you are, so perfect for me. So brilliant,” the Doctor mumbles into your neck, pressing kisses all over your skin wherever he can reach.

You lay there on his coat for another little while, drinking in each other's skin with featherlight touches and appreciative glances until the hard floor becomes too much for you both.

You retire to the shower together to clean up, and you end up cuddling for a while in the warm jets of water.

Life is not always peaceful with the Doctor, but moments like this make it worth it. He’s always worth it.

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motherofdogs1010 · 4 months

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Little Darling II (Thomas Shelby x Reader)

Summary: Birmingham has received a new club, one that is showcasing a exotic type of dance that is drawing in crowds, but it is one particular dancer that catches Thomas Shelby's eye... one that goes by the stage name: Little Darling

Warnings: 18+ only, eventual smut, dry humping, stripper!reader, mentions of prostitution/sex work, language, mentions of nudity, drinking, canon Peaky Blinders violence

A/N: I've seen a lot in interest in my story and a few people asking for a taglist, so if anyone interested, comment below! I'm still new to posting stories on Tumblr so please be patient with me ❤️ thank you for all the love, I also write on Wattpad ❤️

Also if anyone knows any good accounts that make dividers and banners for multiple fandoms, let me know! I plan on expanding into more fandoms like House of the Dragon and Law and Order: SVU!

💋 Dividers @firefly-graphics 💋 Banner @vase-of-lilies

Part I Part III

Y/N yawned as she stretched her body, she lightly slapped her cheeks in a effort to finish waking herself up as she moved about her kitchen. Last night's shift proved to be a good one thanks to the Peaky Blinders that had attended and the lap dance she had given to Thomas Shelby.

She rubbed her eyes as she moved about to begin getting her breakfast ready. Working as a dancer might not have been ideal for some women, but the money was worth it as she was managing to use some of it towards her mother to help with her father since his failing health had put them in an troubled position.

After breakfast and getting herself ready for the day, Y/N grabbed her small handbag, wicker basket and hat, walking out the front door and locking it as she began to make her way to the market to buy food for her parents.

As she walked down the street, she heard the rumbling of a car beside her and she glanced over to see him.

"Hello there", Thomas Shelby called out to her. "Y/N right?"

Y/N felt her pace slow a little as shock came over her... how the fuck did the man find her? Cherry would never out her, they wore masks to hide their identities to prevent trouble that the working girls get from men and angry wives.

"Hello", she answered back with a unsure look. "What can I help you with, Mr. Shelby?"

He slowly followed her down the street, she passed by some people who quickly walked by them as she stopped and sucked in a deep breath, turning to look at the man.

"Just wanted to know when you're working next, Little Darling", he smirked, his voice teasing.

Her eyes widen a little in shock and anger as she gritted her teeth as he stopped the car, leaning back in his seat and she approached the door.

"Didn't Cherry tell you 'no talking about the club'?" she hissed, Thomas chuckled at her.

She hated how attractive the man was; the lap dance that she had given him the night before gave her a real close-up of his features and she was able to tell he found her attractive.... well, she could also feel how attracted he was to her but he did respect the rules of not asking for sex or a blowjob from her since that was against the policies Cherry had put in place.

"She did", Thomas said, amused as he began to light a cigarette. "But I haven't been know for being a rule follower, love."

"Who blabbed?" she demanded, he grinned a shit-eating grin.

"I believe her name was 'Sugar'", he replied as he took a drag of the cancer stick.

That damn bitch... Sugar, or Annie as she was actually called, had it out for her for weeks now for some unknown reason.

"I'm not telling you", she replied, "have some other dancer service you."

"Why don't you come on in?" Thomas asked, reaching over to open the passenger door. "I'm sure you'd be more interested in discussing... our matter of affairs in here."

Narrowing her eyes, she pursed her lips as she moved to sit inside the car and shut the door behind her. She placed the basket in the backseat as she stared at the man, who took another drag of his cigarette.

"We have no matter of affairs", she said, "I performed a service for you, that was it."

"A service?" he said, "you're making it sound like you had my cock in your mouth."

"Oh, don't be so vulgar", she said with a roll of her eyes. "If you wanted your cock wet, you could go see Lizzie Stark like every other man."

"Lizzie doesn't move like you do, darling", Thomas said.

"Unfortunately for you, if you want another dance", she said, gathering her things, "you either find another dancer down at the club to give you a dance or you wait."

"Wait for what?" he asked as he watched her get out of the car.

"For when I'm working."

With the money she made, she managed to get enough food for her parents for the next week or so; carrying the now heavy basket, she walked up the steps to her parents' home, lugging the heavy wicker basket as she knocked on the door.

She waited a few moments before the door opened, revealing her mother; her hair was tied up as she wore a shawl around her. Her parents were older, Y/N having been a miracle baby of sorts from what her mother would tell her because of her mother having been pregnant with her later in life.

"Y/N", her mother said with a tired smile. "You're father will be happy to see you."

"I brought you food", she answered, her mother's hands came to caress her cheeks.

"My sweet girl", her mother said before letting inside.

After going inside and leaving the wicker basket of fresh food in the kitchen, she left her mother to walk to her parents' bedroom, where her father seemed to be most of the time.

She found him sitting in bed as he just stared out into nothing.

"Hi dad", she greeted, sitting on the edge of the bed.

But he just continued to stare into nothing.

It was a day later when she went into work, Cherry was eagerly awaiting her when she entered from the back entrance. All dancers especially were meant to enter from there since The Scarlet Letter prided itself on its secrecy of the dancers, the girls may know each other under the masks, the customers did not.

Well, they shouldn't... except that bitch Sugar apparently was running her mouth as Y/N seethed.

"Y/N", Cherry grinned, pushing her strawberry blonde hair from her forehead. "You have repeat customer."

She sucked in a deep breath through her nose as she lowered her purse onto her vanity before saying, "Sugar's been running her mouth to customers."

Cherry's grin fell and a deep frown replaced it, "She's being a rat?"

"Seems like it", she answered as she moved to the wardrobe. "Ratted me out to Thomas Shelby."

"And by coincidence, he's here tonight", Cherry said with a shake of her head.

Y/N pulled out a blood red piece, the bra was made differently compared to the ones that were popular; instead of making her breasts flatter, this bra accentuated them, cupping them in vibrant lace and shimmer. The underwear was different as well, not like the shorts that she would normally wear under dress, but instead had thin string that went around her hips, red fabric covering her ass and front just enough to leave imagination to wonder.

"What did he want?"

"Wanted to know when I'd dance again."

Cherry was silent as Y/N moved to the drawers on the vanity, opening it and pulling out a matching mask.

"I'll have another talk with Sugar, let her know she's on thin ice."

She had those pinned curls again, a red feather on the side of her head where the hair was slicked up against her; the matching sinful red lips pouted as she slid down the pole. Tommy watched with a cigarette hanging, she was like a siren calling to him with those half-lidded, bedroom eyes that were haunting him.

Tommy knew Arthur and John were somewhere in the club, probably getting dances in the private rooms but he had to wait. He saw her sway her hips as she held the pole, he could feel his pants begin to tighten a bit as she slowly dropped down into the splits, a wink sent his way.

Y/N found herself straddling Thomas Shelby again, her head tilted as she stared down at him.

"I see you waited", she said, "didn't take you for having patience."

"In the right situation", Thomas said as he leaned back in the chair. "I can be a bloody saint."

She began to grind her pelvis down in his, a groan escaped the man as she loosely wrapped her arms around his neck, her tits in his face as she moved like a seductress. Unfortunately, her grinding down on him added stimulation to her clit, making waves of pleasure begin to take over her.

"Awful rule you've got here, no touching."

Suddenly, she felt his grip her hips before grinding back up into her, a startled gasp escaping her as he grasped her chin and knocked off her mask.

"Too bad I don't like following them, darling."

He smashed their lips together and she moaned at the searing, hot feeling that seemed to tingle her body as she continued grinding... well, more dry humping down on Thomas.

She knew it was only going to complicate things, but at the current moment, she ignored it for the minutes of pleasure the man was giving her.

TAGLIST

@amanda08319

#thomas shelby x reader #thomas shelby #thomas shelby smut #peaky blinders imagine #peaky blinders x reader #peaky blinders #cillian murphy #chubby reader #x reader #reader insert #reader x character #cillian x reader

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femme4ngel · 1 year

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can you pleaseee do a story about haaland being insecure about something while looking at himself in the mirror and y/n enters the room and comforts him then they end up making out

i hv an exam tomorrow but this inspired me hope u like it <3

erling haaland x fem reader

it wasn’t like him to feel down at all. usually he felt full of power and confidence, he believed in himself and couldn’t care less about what others said about him. he was the strong, norwegian viking after all.

but today was different and you noticed it. he did poorly in the match and although city still won, he’s rating was low and his failed shots were posted all over the internet. you felt his sadness and disappointment, the way he walked out of the changing room, the way his usual bright smile faded away. he could take all the criticism about the way he played, he could take it when it was about his talent or the lack of it, but he couldn’t deal with criticism about his looks. you told him not to go on instagram, to not open comments but he couldn’t stop himself. he sat in the changing room for a good 30 minutes scrolling nonstop, every rude comment, every mean word about his face seeping into his mind. he suddenly felt small and uncomfortable in his own skin, and all he craved was your touch and kind words. you noticed immediately as he walked besides you on your way to the car, his fingers holding tightly onto yours, his golden hair laying on his shoulders, his eyes fixated on the floor. he needed soft touches and sweet words whispered into his ears, a hug and kisses all over his cheeks.

and you knew exactly how to make him feel better, how to make the sad pout disappear from his face.

- hey baby what about a bath when we get home? i got a new bathbomb yesterday, its strawberry and vanilla scented. - you look over at him in the car, his eyes are sad and his fingers viciously gripping the wheel but he seems to like your idea a lot, his face lighting up, his cheeks blushing.

you took baths together whenever either of you was feeling down, the bubbles, the relaxation of the warm water and the closeness of your bodies cheering you up instantly. so as soon as you get home you tell him to go and get out of his clothes and wait for a little in the bedroom while you start the bath and collect all the stuff you want to put into it. you eventually gather all of your things, and with the bathbombs and gels in your hand return to the bedroom. you find your boyfriend staring at himself in the mirror, theres a frustrated look spreading across his beautiful features, his eyebrows are furrowed. he looks like he might start crying and you feel your heart breaking by the sight. you walk up to him, hugging him from behind, your smaller frame disappearing into his. your fingers are running up and down on his torso, caressing his skin, drawing circles on his waist. your cheek is resting against his back, hes warm and he smells like him. like erling, like soap and grass and his lingering parfume. you want him to know how beautiful he is, how his touch lights your skin up, how his eyes mesmerize you, how it feels to call him yours.

- can we take the bath and then watch a dumb movie? im so tired, im sorry..- he asks, theres some shame in his voice as he stares at his reflection.

- of course baby, lets go, i think the water is already perfect.- you grab his hand as you guide him to the bathroom, holding him close and tight, wanting to show him how beautiful he truly is.

#football imagines #erling haaland fluff #erling haaland #haaland #haaland imagine #erling håland #erling haaland imagine #erling haaland smut #haaland x reader #erling haaland x reader

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sailoryooons · 8 months

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Lights | Episode 0 | jjk (m)

❀ Pairing: Idol!Jungkook x Producer! F. reader

❀ Summary: Meeting Jungkook was a chance of fate. A moment frozen in time, eyes meeting across a room full of lights. The more the two of you advance in your career, the more lost in the lights you become. What if you never find your way back?

❀ Word Count: 583

❀ Genre: Heavy angst, Idolverse, strangers to lovers, eventual smut

❀ Rating: 18+ Minors are strictly prohibited from engaging and reading this content. It contains explicit content and any minors discovered reading or engaging with this work will be blocked immediately.

❀ Warnings: Nothing really in this chapter, vague references to being a kid growing up in a competitive environment, reader being a little poetic about her childhood.

❀ Published: September 28, 2023

❀ A/N: Hola, in honor of 3D I decided to post the prologue of this thing I have been working on while on hiatus as a cool project to inspire myself to write again. I have no idea what I’m doing, but I am writing this story as though it were sort of a ... famous person tells all. 98% of the story will be in the present tense and we read it as if it's happening, with small interludes of present-day where reader is reflecting on her life in an interview with Namjoon. I have no idea if I will stick with it, so please be patient and let me write this at whatever pace works best for me. And remember - there are going to be very dark parts of this series, and Jungkook and reader both are going to have very ugly moments. If that’s not your cup of tea and you do not like to see characters epically fail and sometimes reveal the ugly parts of themselves, this fic is not for you.

❀ Disclaimer: All members of BTS are faces and name claims for this story. This is entirely a work of fiction and by no means is meant to be a projection, judgment, or representation of real-life people. Any scenarios or representations of the people and places mentioned in works are not representative of real-life scenarios. This series in no way attempts to paint a realistic depiction of idols, or the industry, or draw comparisons. None of the scenes or elements in this series in any way reflect how I perceive the music industry and do not represent any opinions as a whole. This is not intellectual commentary, it is just straight-up fiction.

“In omnia paratus. Ready for anything,” you scoff, shaking your head. “Seems like a pretty big ideal for a teenager. You have to understand, we all felt that way. A bunch of kids working for the same dream, ready to push, shove, claw our way to it.”

Namjoon adjusts his glasses and nods. His long legs are crossed at the ankle as he leans back in his seat, the perfect picture of poise. His glasses are low on his nose and he’s dressed in a warm cardigan today to fight off the chill of Autumn.

“Was it really competitive?” he prompts, fingers laced together. “What was that like?”

“It’s hard to say. I viewed it through the lens of a kid at the time. I guess to me it would have felt like a game - be better than everyone else, get a reward.”

“And now, through the lens of an adult.”

You heave a sigh and blow out air. You're in the comfort of your home up in the hills, a fireplace crackling to your left. The production crew thankfully didn’t fuss with your living room too much. It was perfect the way it was, muted tones and lived in, not some minimal, sterile space like Seokjin might have or the maximalist terror of Taehyung’s estate.

“Now,” you venture, slowly stringing the words together. “I think it was where I learned to take no prisoners and to do whatever I had to do to win. Being that close to your dream, and meeting the legends you want to imitate while living in constant fear it might be taken away… it creates a feral desire in you. Feeds the monster inside the kid that has just started to wake up.”

“Would you say that’s where the hardship began?”

You shake your head. “Not the kind that we’re here to talk about. It wasn’t like - I wasn’t a child star, you know? I was still relatively normal. It was school and working on dancing and singing and all of these things because I wanted to produce music and it was hard, but it wasn’t… It wasn't cruel. It wasn’t dark.”

“When would you say is when it first really started to turn for you?” Namjoon asks, leaning forward a bit. “The first moment you can remember that you might have taken that first step towards everything.”

“In omnia paratus,” you murmur again. You think about that night, gaze unfocused. You no longer see Namjoon, but rather a shock of shaggy, black hair, doe eyes filled with promise, and an arm full of tattoos. “Ready for anything but Jungkook, apparently.”

Namjoon raises his brows. “So the night you met Jungkook?”

“In nihil paratus. I was ready for nothing, least of all the likes of fucking Jeon. That was the first night my management ever asked me to do something extreme. So I did.”

“Tell me about that night, then.”

You remember it so well. You’re not sure how out of all the memories, this one seems so preserved. Crystal clear and sharp at the edges. You remember the tight, white shirt Jungkook was wearing, tucked into dark jeans paired with boots. His tattoos were stark against his shirt and his hair was wavy, a little damp with sweat.

Jungkook had looked at you from across the event floor, an ocean swimming with swaying bodies and flashing lights, cryogenic fog hanging in the air. You’d just walked in, careful not to trip in your stilettos as you walked down the steps. Nervous. Near cracking under pressure.

And then you looked up, right at those round, dark eyes.

In nihil paratus. You were ready for nothing.

#jungkook smut #jungkook angst #jeon jungkook smut #jungkook fanfic #jungkook fic #jungkook x you #jeon jungkook fic #jeon jungkook fanfic #jungkook x reader #idolverse au #minors do not interact #minors dni

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christinesficrecs · 6 months

Note

do you have any recs for fics post 3B or post season 4? Thank you!! Love your blog 💜💞

I'm so glad you asked! 🩷 This is my "omg, this was so good" list. 😊

Written in the Scars by dr_girlfriend | 15.3K | Explicit

Stiles stared into eyes that were just a little lighter than even the day before, looking almost beta-gold in the harsh lighting. His nose was just a little less uptilted, the moles on his face not quite where they used to be. The scar on the bottom of his chin from when he fell off the swings in third grade was just gone. He seemed a little bit taller, his shoulders a little bit wider.

With trembling fingers Stiles folded his left ear forward, craning his neck. A wheezing breath escaped him, his legs suddenly feeling weak with relief.

The mark of the Oni was still there, the one that meant self.

Stiles was still himself. For now.

The Walls Are Breathing In by secondstar | 41.8K | Explicit

Nothing could go wrong. It was just supposed to be a safe trip to the Nemeton. But this is Beacon Hills and things are rarely that simple. Welcome to the life of Stiles Stilinski.

Or, that time that Stiles accidentally became a sorcerer against his will.

Someone Else’s Dream by theroguesgambit | 36.6K

Post-3B. Derek has gone missing, and Stiles’ dreams might be the only way to save him.

out of the nightmare, into your arms by tryslora | 6.4K

Stiles wakes up in the bathtub. It’s the third time sleepwalking this week, and at least this time he’s in the house. Ever since the Nogitsune, he’s had nightmares and nothing, and no one seems to be able to stop them. Until Derek.

Full On Rainstorm by BarlowGirl | 10.5K | Explicit

He catches Derek by the arm and Derek lets himself be turned, surprised when Stiles shoves a small box into his hands. “I don’t know if you still celebrate it or what but… I wanted you to know someone was thinking about you. Happy birthday.”

Then he squeezes Derek’s arm and bolts, gone before Derek can think to stop him.

He opens the box standing there, only to find one singular, misshapen, sloppily-frosted, cupcake, with a candle in the box next to it. It’s kind of squished despite the paper towel all around it to keep it from banging around in the box.

If You’re Going Through Hell (Keep Going) | 48.5K

Stiles thought everything leading up to Allison’s death was hell, but he was wrong. Spending senior year dealing with the pack’s dismissal of him while secretly training to be Deaton’s replacement was hell. Feeling guilty and hating himself for what the Nogitsune did was hell. Being in love with someone who would never love him back was hell. Well, if you’re going through hell, keep going.

Not Quite Lost (Not Quite Found) by alocalband | 25K | Explicit

A year after the nogitsune is defeated, Derek is living a quiet life in the mountains above a small town in Colorado.

Then Stiles shows up.

The One You Choose by Asterekmess (Livinginfictions) | 13.4K | Mature

Stiles hadn’t seen Scott in over a week, except for glances he caught during school hours.

Saturday Night At The Movies by aussiebee | 7.3K | Explicit

After running into Stiles at the late night movies, Derek realises just how badly Stiles is handling the post-nogitsune fallout. He knows the feeling.

Sense of Home by siny | 53K | Explicit

Home can be a place, but it can also be a person.

After the events with the Nemeton, Stiles starts suffering the consequences of their sacrifice. A journey he attempts to make on his own, but only becomes worse with every step he takes. In the process he seeks comfort in an unexpected place and it draws him toward an unexpected person.

Illuminated by ZainClaw | 5K

“Because I’m falling in love with you and it’s scaring the hell out of me.”

Start Small, Like Oak Trees by SmallBirds | 24.2K

The months following Allison’s death have passed Stiles by in a haze of monotony. He sleepwalks through days that seem to lose their color, an unwilling passenger in a body he no longer trusts. Eventually, he thinks, he’ll just fade away. He isn’t sure anyone would notice. Then, during a spur of the moment grocery run, he stumbles upon Derek Hale attempting to console a lost child, and for the first time in recent memory the world doesn’t seem so awful. He’s not sure what he’d been expecting when he eventually convinces Derek to move into the Stilinski’s spare bedroom, but a newfound passion for weeding and topsoil certainly isn’t it.

Nitesky by thepsychicclam | 7K

Stiles has trouble dealing with the after effects of the nogitsune, and Derek finds him sitting on his roof.

Honey, Can’t you See (The Bloodstains on my Teeth) by Loup_Aigre, TroubleIWant | 44.9K

“Mr Stilinski.” Deaton’s usually impassive face betrays a hint of surprise today, maybe even disappointment. “You haven’t changed your mind.”

Stiles tips his chin up, smiling against his irritation. “Nope,” he confirms, so cheerily it bites. They had arranged this weeks ago, yet Deaton was apparently betting Stiles wouldn’t go through with it in the end. Fuck that. He doesn’t know what it’s like out there, not really. He can afford to hold himself aloof and uninvolved, knowing his druid power is enough to keep him safe in this little office. Stiles can’t. Scott’s pack has got to protect this whole town, and Stiles’ spark isn’t enough to protect all of them while they do it.

^^^technically not post-3B but soooo good!

#asks #sterek fics #ficrecs #marnz #tw season 3 #post 3b #post nogitsune stiles

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helladirections · 2 years

Photo

Under Summer Skies

(the long awaited Campfic)

a/n: As an alumni of 11 years of Jewish Summer Camp, this fic means more to me than anything else I have ever posted on here. I’ve been planning to write this for as long as I can remember, and working on it for at least 2 years. I hate editing and literally spent months editing. So if it’s terrible please do not tell me.

Author: @helladirections Pairing: Harry x YN Status: Complete Word Count: 37k

MASTERLIST | PATREON | USS TAG | WRITING TAG

Deleted Scene - Campout Extra 1: Lemon Over Ice

Summary: Harry and YN are longtime best friends back for another summer as the Dream Team on staff. Featuring getting called out by 12 year olds, two dumb best friends who can’t see what’s right in front of them, and lots of stargazing.

Preview:

“Listen to me YN. I’ll be here for everything you need. I can be everything for you. Let me be everything for you.” He took a deep breath, shifting his hand from her jaw to rest on her cheek instead. “I can tell that you’re lonely, but I’m literally right here. Let me be here for you. I just... I want you to be happy. Let me make you happy.” “I’m so lucky to have a friend like you, Harry.”

Read below or on AO3 or Wattpad

Pool time was, objectively, one of the most frustrating parts of the day for YN.

Not because she didn’t like the pool or the kids were difficult - actually it was practically an hour off for most of the counselors because the campers were fenced in and watched closely by lifeguards. No, it was frustrating because she was constantly tempted by Harry’s body in a swimsuit, even though he rarely went swimming.

He wore no shirt and a pair of swim trunks with a shorter seam than she deemed necessary, causing YN to be sometimes distracted by his honey golden skin, which only tanned more as the summer went on. His muscles looked like he could be a professional wrestler, but really he only ever used them for soft, welcoming hugs. His deep green eyes always made the person he was looking at feel like they were the most important person in the world. His chocolate brown curls were often disheveled in exactly the perfect way, the only real sign of exhaustion from a hard day’s work.

There was no doubt in anyone’s mind, Harry was the cute counselor. Even before campers arrived and the staff was still in training, other counselors were falling all over him, just begging for a piece.

Even YN would be lying to say she wasn’t distracted by him at least a little. They were lying beneath the shade of an overhang during pool time; Harry preoccupied with drawing on the back of his clipboard and YN focused on a new, complex friendship bracelet pattern. His skin glowed in the sun, a littering of tattoos on display now that his shirt was off despite the fact that he had no intention of going swimming. And if YN looked close enough (which she definitely did not do) she could just see the light dusting of chest hair he had started to grow in the last few years.

They were a reasonable distance away from the campers, taking advantage of this time to catch up with each other and only keep half an eye on the kids while they were contained and supervised by three lifeguards. They were gossiping about staffing changes among the higher-ups, a rumor that Mitch was hooking up with YN’s co-counselor Sarah, and that Harry’s co-counselor Niall had been hungover when he got back from his last day off. But mostly, they were sitting there together in relative silence. It was nice, and comfortable.

Eventually, Harry broke the silence, snapping the cap back onto his sharpie and letting his clipboard rest on the ground next to him.

He nudged YN’s feet with his own, outstretched as he rested back on his hands. “What are you doing for cabin time tonight?”

“Not sure, why?” After two weeks, she had used up most of her easy evening cabin activities and hadn’t had a chance to start brainstorming new ones yet.

“Thought it might be fun for me to come in. Do a little question time, see what’s on their minds.”

“Really, with kids this young?”

Harry turned to look towards the campers for a moment. Half of them were still enjoying the pool, the other half pretending they were too cool for it and sitting around the edges gossiping or playing cards.

“Why not? Y’girls been staring at me for weeks now, must have somethin’ on their minds.” He gestured towards a group of five or six of her campers, sitting around in a circle whispering and looking over at them, quickly looking away and giggling when Harry waved to them.

YN mulled it over. She had ten campers in her cabin, half of them eleven and half of them twelve. They would definitely be excited for anything involving Harry.

“Alright,” she relented. “I mean, they do adore you.”

“I’m staying in the cabin though,” she clarified. “I know a couple of mine wouldn’t want to be left alone.”

He shrugged. “That’s fair. Y’little one always struck me as quite shy.”

“Oh no,” she laughed. “She’s the most rambunctious of the bunch. Did I tell you what we caught her planning the other day?”

As YN told him the story of the shenanigans her camper had gotten up to, she was reminded of when she and Harry were that age, getting up to similar mischief. Long before Harry was the cute counselor, he was a camper with a reputation, notorious for sneaking out at night to make out with whichever girl was brave enough to risk getting caught. YN, however, was never Harry’s kiss of the week. He never offered, so she never asked, and she buried her little crush in the back of her head to make room for a friendship instead. If he wasn’t busy locking lips with someone, he was still sneaking out, but with platonic intentions to watch the stars with YN.

It was around age 16 or 17 that YN realized it was futile to have a crush on Harry. For one thing, she had too much competition and she could never really compare. And for another thing, having a crush meant being awkward and he just seemed so nice she would rather be able to have an actual conversation with him without trying to uncomfortably flirt (a skill she never truly mastered). That’s when they started eating meals together and sharing items from care packages and gossiping about their friends. It was when they discovered their special spot by the lake and they snuck out to go stargazing and not touch each other. Some of the other girls noticed that they were getting close, but no one ever thought it was anything more than a friendship. More than a few times, YN was asked to put in a good word with him for other girls, hoping that next time he snuck out it would be with them. And sometimes it was, but he had turned down makeout sessions on numerous occasions to stargaze with YN instead.

YN never really stopped thinking Harry was cute, or sweet, or any of the nice things the other girls said about him, because he was. She just stopped putting so much emphasis on those things and treated him like a whole person instead. And somewhere along the line, he started treating her like a whole person as well.

They kept in touch during the school year as they got older - time zones made it difficult while he was back in England but they got creative. YN knew all the gossip at Harry’s school across the ocean, and he knew hers. He called her on holidays, even the American ones that he didn’t celebrate. Sometimes they would text at all hours, first thing in the morning for one of them and last thing at night for the other. But they managed.

So YN gave up on a crush and instead she earned a best friend that she trusted with her entire being. And that trade-off seemed pretty fair to her, looking back. Boys would come and go, but Harry had become a constant, and she didn’t want it any other way.

As they entered into adulthood, they grew even closer. YN had always been very independent, sure, but there was something inside of her that craved companionship that she was never quite able to satisfy. Except for Harry.

Their first year on staff together they were assigned to the same age group for the first half of the summer and from the get-go, there was something special between them. It was even to the point where Mitch, the camp director, noticed that when they were together, kids listened better, cabins were cleaner, and the kids were more engaged in programs. So YN and Harry appropriately started calling themselves the Dream Team and no one ever tried to correct them. It felt nice, YN realized roughly three-quarters of the way through that summer, to feel like she was doing life with someone (even if that someone was a different person than the someone she was hooking up with, but that was beside the point).

So it was natural that when they both came back for their second summer on staff, they were smart enough to equip themselves with cheap little walkie-talkies so they could stay in touch throughout the day and night, seeing as there was no cell service out in nature. Without some lame asshole trying to take advantage of her, YN found herself clinging to Harry even more than the year prior. If he noticed, he never said anything, and he seemed to enjoy being with her at least equally as much. Harry never tried to change her mind about anything important, never tried to pry if she made it clear she wanted to keep something to herself, and never allowed her to feel alone or unloved, which was something she had definitely never experienced before. He made it clear that he valued her independence, her strong-willed nature, and her opinionated mind. Every ex she had ever had, including the one from the summer before, had attempted to change or alter some aspect of who she was, and Harry never did. Instead of trying to reel her in and make her fit into a specific place in his life, the two of them were equally part of each other’s lives, cheering each other on and supporting one another in whatever they were doing or saying or thinking.

To no one’s surprise, they were placed in the same age group together again, too. Unfortunately, they were given the most difficult age group - 11 and 12-year-olds - which Mitch validated by claiming the Dream Team could handle anything. Middle schoolers were difficult for lots of reasons - some had started puberty and had the hormones of teens but the knowledge of children. Others hadn’t yet and felt the pressure to keep up with their peers. They still needed to be reminded to brush their teeth every night, but if they were left alone for too long they might start trying to kiss each other in the middle of the field.

She knew it would be a bit difficult, but everything was made slightly easier with Harry by her side. It meant they could spend quality time together during the day, and when he talked, the campers would actually stop and listen to him. Plus, the girls definitely thought she was cooler since she was so close with the cutest counselor. Unsurprisingly, they were pretty obsessed with Harry. And honestly, YN didn’t blame them.

It was like Harry was born to be a camp counselor. He had something about him that entirely bloomed if he was in the right setting, and YN was confident that their summer camp was that setting. He was fun, energetic, and he played the guitar. The kids loved him and his silly antics, and the staff wanted to be near him. He had the most beautiful British accent which made everyone stop and listen, even the most ruthless campers. And of course, he was undeniably cute.

Before long, the lifeguard blew his whistle. YN and Harry each stood up and started counting their campers, getting ready to head back to the cabins to shower and then on with the rest of the day and other activities. The two of them were glued together as always while they sent their campers off to electives, sat in the daily staff meeting, played sports on the field, and wrangled everyone for dinner. And they walked together leading the group to their evening activity for the day. Which at the three-week mark in the summer was a talent show in front of the campfire.

The talent show was a camper favorite and the counselors even came up with a clever name for it a few years ago - Talents Under The Sky (TUTS). So, after every act instead of applauding the audience would “tut, tut, tut” as if they were disciplining a toddler. It made no sense, but everyone bought into it and it brought out laughter so it was definitely a winner as far as Mitch was concerned.

YN was mostly relieved that she was going through this with kids that were old enough to have actual real talents, and not the 8-year-olds that all insisted on doing skits about nothing that made no sense while speaking too quietly for anyone to hear. Her campers sang songs, did gymnastics, and told jokes. One of Harry’s even attempted to rap. He was a total mess, but you’d never know based on the way that Harry cheered him on and congratulated him when he got off the stage.

After all the kids had their turn, a few of the counselors decided to step up and show off as well. Sarah read slam poetry that was clearly a joke and had the kids bending over with laughter. And Niall brought out one of his golf clubs to hit pinecones with, allowing some of the campers to run out into the field and measure which one went the furthest. But YN had limited skills and didn’t want to embarrass herself in front of campers who already only thought she was cool when she was next to Harry, so instead of going up on stage, she used her marshmallow roasting talent to build s’mores for all the kids.

Harry, on the other hand, was actually filled with talent. As the last act of the night, he joked that he was headlining the show. With a guitar in hand, he stepped up to the stage. Lit by the fire in front of him, his skin glowed even more than it did under the bright summer sun. His rosemary eyes reflected the sparks of the fire, twinkling in a way that made it so YN couldn’t look away (she almost burnt a marshmallow but blew out the flame just in time). But mostly, YN thought he looked at peace, at home. Sitting there on the stage in front of campers, staff, the fire, and YN must be his happy place, YN decided.

He pursed his lips to the side as he sat there on a chair and looked up at the sky considering what to play.

“Anyway, here’s Wonderwall,” he started with a chuckle and no other introduction.

The campers sang along, but Harry’s voice came across strong and clear over them. It didn’t really matter what he was singing, his voice would always be soothing to her ears. It reminded her of years past, of their own campfire talent shows, of music elective as a camper, and late nights under the stars. She felt goosebumps on her skin, but brushed them off as caused by the chilly night air.

By the end of the song, every camper had a s’more and YN switched her focus to making one for herself (and one for Harry after he finished playing guitar).

Harry let out a breath. “Ok.” he slapped his own legs with finality. “That was... not too bad, right?”

Most of the kids cheered for him, but one of the boys from his cabin called out “that was trash!” giggling as he spoke.

“Early bedtime for you tonight, I think,” Harry called out with a laugh. “Alright, I know we said everyone got to do one song but... I’m in charge so I’m gonna do another and no one can stop me.”

A few of the campers laughed and YN smiled as she finished putting together the sandwich treats for herself and Harry.

“Some of you might know this song, but I’m not sure. It’s one of my favorites and it’s called Girl Crush.”

YN sat on a bench, her own s’more in hand as she gazed up at Harry in front of her. Curled in on herself and her sweater to keep warm, YN admired the way the stars framed his face. She could feel a bit of marshmallow finding its place on the corner of her mouth, but she didn’t mind - the treat in her hand tasted good and the majority of her attention was on Harry and his guitar.

His voice sounded beautiful with everything he sang, but for some reason on this last song, YN felt completely enraptured by his angelic tones. He belted out notes that she didn’t think he could reach, lyrics clear and melody soothing. And if she didn’t know any better, YN could swear he was looking over in her direction a little too often.

There was a moment at the end of the song - all the campers and staff were silent as Harry was singing softly, his gaze directed at YN, eyes wide and unblinking. He finished the last word, strummed the last chord, and in that moment, it looked like he was going to say something. Taking a breath, he opened his mouth, but no words came out. His audience waited for a beat or two, expecting him to say something with finality, but he didn’t. All he did was cock his head to the side, look into YN’s eyes, and sigh.

“Alright, a round of applause for all of our very talented friends tonight!” Sarah called out, breaking up the moment.

Harry blinked a few times and turned his attention back to the rest of the group, clapping along with the campers. He stood up and walked off the stage, removed the guitar strap from his chest, and went to sit next to YN, taking the s’more out of her hands with a small smile of thanks but not saying anything.

When YN got her campers back to the cabin after closing circle, they were still hyped up from TUTS, but mostly they were gushing over Harry’s singing.

“He sounded so pretty and his hair looked so cute!”

“Oh my gosh did you guys see the way he was looking at YN while he sang that last song? He’s totally in love with her!”

YN realized it was time to cut them off and shift their attention. “Brush your teeth please, but don’t get changed for bed. We’re having a guest tonight!” YN called out when she got her campers back to their cabin.

The girls immediately started giggling and chatting, giddy with excitement as they tried to guess who would be coming and what they would be doing. For the most part, they followed her instructions and cleaned up the floor for their guest before sitting together in a circle in the front of the cabin by YN’s bed. She checked her watch - Harry should be there any moment, it couldn’t take that long to get his boys ready for bed and leave them with Niall.

It was sweet, the way the girls were all jittery and excited without even knowing what was in store. YN fondly remembered nights exactly like this when she was their age. Sure camp taught her how to climb trees and tie-dye shirts and sing new songs, but the untold truth was that camp was the perfect place to learn about boys and kissing and dating, and when she was only a year or two older than her current campers she appreciatively remembers a girl telling her about blow jobs. It seemed so grotesque back then - boys don’t even wipe when they pee, why would she want to put that in her mouth?

Finally a knock at the door.

“Hello? Yeh all decent?” Harry called from the other side of the cabin’s door.

The girls shrieked.

“Yeah, come on in,” YN replied.

Harry walked in, ducking his head to make it through the barrier which had been originally built in the 1930s and had hardly been upgraded since. When he looked up and made eye contact with her, YN couldn’t help but notice how bright his deep green eyes looked, even after a long exhausting day of being a camp counselor. He had on a pair of worn-out jeans with holes over the knees and a baseball t-shirt with a yellow collar and sleeves, which showed off his arms nicely.

He made his way over to the center of the cabin and sat down on YN’s bed next to her. The girls were all smiling and whispering to each other.

“Y’need anythin’? Water?” Harry asked YN softly, holding up his own water bottle.

YN chuckled a bit. “H, this is my cabin, I’m good.”

“Just making sure,” he shrugged before turning his attention to the campers. “Alright ladies,” Harry started. He almost always referred to the girls as ‘ladies’, and YN secretly loved it - it was sweet that he was giving them that kind of respect. The campers quieted down, looking directly at him like whatever came out of his mouth was going to be the most important thing in the world. “I’m here tonight to do a question time. Ask m’anything you want. Can ask about me, or about boys, or camp, or school. Whatever’s on y’minds, alright? All questions are valid and I’m an open book.”

He smirked, looking over to YN next to him. The area was small and their shoulders and legs were touching as the aging bed sagged in the middle from their weight.

A few girls raised their hands to start asking questions, and Harry called on them one at a time. They started rather innocently.

“What’s your middle name?”

“Edward.”

“How many years have you come to camp?”

“This would be m’tenth.”

“What’s your favorite color?”

“Pink.”

But it wasn’t long before they strayed...

“What color is your underwear right now?”

“Blue.”

“Boxers or briefs?”

“Do y’even know what the difference is? Anyway boxer-briefs.”

“How old were you when you had your first kiss?”

“Hmm...” he paused. “Think I was thirteen. Happened here at camp actually, out behind the Oak cabin if m’not mistaken.”

“Ooh tell us the story!”

Harry smiled, looking over towards YN. He opened his mouth to speak but one of the girls interrupted him.

“Oh was YN your first kiss?!?!?”

Harry chuckled. “No, no. But she was kind of there if I remember correctly.”

YN nodded at the memory.

“Was with a girl in my age group named Anna. Though she was quite cute, so I gave her the pot I made in art elective. Sat next to her at every meal for three days, too. Finally, she slipped a message to me to meet her outside behind her cabin at midnight, when she thought her counselors would be gone. So me and Niall snuck out of our cabin and met her. We got there and she had a friend with her, so our two friends walked a little bit away. Was quite awkward, but she was sweet.”

“I was in the cabin,” YN clarified. “But we were all staring out the window.”

“And your counselors were asleep?”

Harry laughed again. “No, we underestimated how late they would stay up. Got caught red-handed, we did.”

The campers laughed.

“But I want yeh to know, it’s ok if you’re a lot older before you have your first kiss, or younger, or however old. The most important thing is that it’s a good experience, right YN?”

He looked over at her for reassurance and she nodded.

“And always remember, you never need to define yourself by a romantic partner. You are all strong little people who will grow up into stronger bigger people. And if you really want a partner when you’re older, you’ll find one who respects you for who you are. But don’t ever be afraid of being alone.”

The campers totally looked past her well-meaning, deep-hearted advice. “How old were you, YN?”

“Hey now, that’s for another night. This is Harry’s question time, not mine,” she teased back at her camper.

“Harry, do you have a girlfriend?”

He took a deep, shaky breath and stared at the ceiling for a moment before answering. YN knew the question must be difficult for him. He’d been dating a girl back in London for around six months when he heard back that he had been hired to work at camp for another summer. She didn’t want to come with him. She didn’t want to do long distance. She didn’t want him to leave.

Harry called YN out of the blue one day - well it was the middle of the night for him, that’s why he said he called her instead of a friend in London. He told her that he didn’t want to wake anyone up. And he wanted to know what she thought since she was his best camp friend. And she was honest with him.

“Look H, I can’t tell you what to do. But I want you to be happy and I know I’ve never seen you happier than when you’re on a hike to the hidden campsite. And someone who really loves you should also want you to be happy. But I don’t know. Maybe you’re happier with her and I haven’t seen it. Just... do what makes you happy H, yeah?

He broke up with her the next day and called YN in a blubbering mess.

“No, no I don’t,” he answered softly.

“You should date YN!” one of the younger ones called out without missing a beat.

YN felt herself blushing, but she wasn’t sure why. Campers always wanted their counselors to date each other. And it wasn’t the first time someone had suggested it to the two of them. But he was sitting close to her, legs and arms touching, lounging on top of her favorite blanket. It had been a while since she had even considered it. But there was no point in thinking about it, really - they were best friends and she wouldn’t risk anything to lose him.

Harry flashed her a toothy smile, and if she didn’t know any better, YN would’ve sworn she saw a glimmer of mischief in his eyes.

“I don’t know, ladies. Your YN’s got staff boys falling all over her,” he teased. “Of course they know they have to get through me, first,” he said, puffing out his chest in show.

She gave him a playful shove and they both laughed. They both knew it wasn’t true.

“You’d be so cute though! Harry could sing to you and you could go on romantic hikes and he clearly likes you, everyone can tell.”

Harry was smiling, all in good fun until that very last statement. His brows were high on his forehead, eyes wide. He coughed. YN tried to read him, but it was hard. Other than shock, he wasn’t giving much away. Taking a deep breath, he looked back over to YN. Their eyes met and she shrugged.

“Have you ever dated each other? Or kissed? Or anything?”

Both of them shook their heads. “Nope. YN is my best friend. We’re the dream team, right?” he looked to her for a nod of agreement. “I’m so lucky to have her in my life.”

“Ok, well, what’s your favorite thing about YN?”

Harry looked at her for a moment. “I like... I like that she’s kind to everyone, even if they don’t deserve it.”

Most of the campers let out a little “aw” as she blushed at his response. But the little one wasn’t satisfied with the answer.

“What’s your favorite thing about her physically though?”

“Everything,” he answered quickly.

The response kind of took her by surprise. He didn’t even take a pause to think it over, didn’t try and come up with a bullshit work-around answer. Straight up, ‘everything’. What was she supposed to do with that information? Did he actually like the way she looked?

“Ok, next question?”

“You sang that song Girl Crush so... do you have a crush on anyone?”

His smirk spread across his face.

“A crush is supposed to be a secret, if I tell you then what happens?” he answered. “Can’t have you telling her because then I’ll never get my chance to do it properly, hm?”

“That means yes, you totally do!”

He shrugged. “Alright, who’s next?”

“How do I know if a boy likes me?”

“Who was your first crush?”

“What do penises taste like?”

Some of the questions really challenged the statement that all questions were valid and they wouldn’t laugh. But they did their best. YN definitely helped answer some, because Harry for one had no idea what penises tasted like, but he did promise that if he ever found out, they would be the first to get his report back.

They pushed and pushed about the two of them together. Something about being 11 and 12 years old made it engraved into their DNA that they would never let this go, no matter how many times both Harry and YN reassured the kids that they were only best friends. They asked what his favorite color of eyes was, and then pointed out that YN had that color. They asked what his ideal first date would be, and then cheered about how cute it would be for the two of them to go on that together. And they asked what he likes best in a girl, easily noticing that every characteristic he mentioned matched YN perfectly.

All together, Harry’s visit was probably the most exciting cabin time they had ever had. They were pretty riled up by the end of it when YN noticed it was ten minutes past their bedtime and forced the session to a close.

“You can ask me any questions, any time you want. I’m a safe, open book, alright?” he promised them.

“Except not who you like!”

“Still gotta keep some things to myself, hm?” he said, looking directly at YN.

After Harry left, YN spent over half an hour getting the campers settled down and ready for bed. All in all, they were good kids, even if tweens were generally awful. At least her kids listened pretty well and everyone took showers. That’s all she could really ask of them.

She turned the lights out, saying goodnight and walking back over to her bed area. Technically, counselors were supposed to stay inside the cabin if it was their turn for bed watch. But YN’s co-counselor was on a night off, and she hadn’t had a spare minute to herself for far too long, so she changed into her PJs, grabbed her phone, and snuck out the back door.

Her quiet escape was almost ruined, though, when she walked directly into another body and gasped louder than she meant to.

Harry put his hand over her mouth as fast as he could.

“Don’t let them hear you,” he whispered.

She smiled, and Harry let his hand slowly drop away.

“Scared me, H,” she told him as quietly as she could manage. “This is what the walkies are for, aren’t they?”

He chuckled a bit, taking half a step back and nodding towards the half-wall built in to support the hill a few feet away. They sat together for a moment in silence, looking at the window and listening for any movement that might be coming from inside the cabin. Only when they were both convinced the kids were still in bed did YN released the breath she was holding and turned to face Harry.

“The girls had fun tonight, I think,” she whispered softly.

Harry smirked. “So did I.”

“After you left they asked me what boxer briefs were.” She paused for a moment, laughing at the ridiculous way the question sounded as it came out of her camper’s mouth. “Led to quite an interesting discussion, I think.”

“Oh, I bet. You’ll have to give me your notes on it later,” he responded.

YN realized she was still holding onto her phone, so she slipped it into her back pocket. She had wanted to come out here to be alone, but being with Harry was undoubtedly better.

“You know,” she started, looking straight ahead towards the cabin. “They’ve been telling me to date you all week.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, probably should’a warned you about that.”

She turned back to see him shrug.

“Didn’t mind the question that much, really.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, why would I mind?”

Because you would never want to date me. Because I could never compare to your ex. Because every straight girl on staff is plotting how to get into your pants. Because we’ve been best friends for years and I gave up hope on anything romantic between us ages ago. Because everyone I’ve ever been with has made it clear that in some way, I’m too much for them.

“Dunno,” she lied. “Kids can make things like that a bit awkward, ya know?”

Harry responded with a noncommittal hum. “I don’t know. They’re just kids - they have crushes and want to start dating and so they project that onto us. ‘S natural.”

“I guess... Sounded good at TUTS tonight,” she tried to change the subject.

“Thanks, love that song. It means... a lot to me...”

YN nodded, kicking a pebble lightly with her toe.

“Did you mean what you said when they asked you about the crush?”

“Which part?”

“The part where... well you said you had one but you wouldn’t tell...”

Harry chuckled a bit. “Course I won't tell a bunch of kids like that. When it’s time to tell her I like her, she’ll know.”

YN looked up at the sky as she contemplated what that meant - that he had already fallen for someone else and her chances with him (that she definitely wasn’t hoping for) were all but forgotten. The feeling wasn’t new, but it meant that maybe one day, sooner than she would like, her place beside him would be replaced with someone else and she would be out on her own again. Which, honestly, was ok. She had gone this long by herself, she could do it again. But she couldn’t deny that she would miss having someone next to her, physically and metaphorically.

The sun had gone down long ago, and the stars were shining bright above them. That’s one thing she especially loved about camp - the nighttime stars. They were so much clearer than in the city. It was easy to get lost in them if she allowed herself - not unlike Harry’s eyes when he gave her that special look filled with softness and care and something else could never quite place. His eyes were probably made of stardust, she thought. Like someone had snatched one out of the sky, ground it up into little tiny flecks, and scattered them around his face as a little baby. And now, years later, those flakes were still present as shiny spots in his irises, in freckles on his nose, in the little mole under the corner of his mouth.

She wasn’t sure how long she’d been staring at the sky before Harry nudged her.

“Oh, sorry.”

“Lookin’ at the stars again?”

“Yeah,” she sighed.

“Hey,” he brought her attention back to him. “What do you say we go stargazing tomorrow night? You’ll be off, right?”

It had been a long time since they had gone out together in the late night, walking to the hidden spot near the lake where they would lay on their backs and look at the stars. Sometimes they were silent, but other times they talked about what else was out there, or what shapes they could see in the stars, or anything and everything that came to their minds.

YN furrowed her brow. “Yeah, but you’ll be on bed watch, right?”

“Technically,” he shrugged. “But Niall owes me.”

She didn’t respond right away. Maybe she was still a bit lost in the stars, or maybe she was lost in Harry.

“Y’cold?”

“Hm?” she asked.

Harry reached out to rub her arm. “Got goosebumps. Y’want my jacket?”

She looked first at where Harry was trying to warm her, and then quickly noticed what had probably actually gotten his attention. When she changed into her PJs she had taken off her bra, not expecting to be face to face with anyone else for the night. It wasn’t completely out of the ordinary for the two of them to be hanging around in pajamas and braless, but they weren’t usually outside in the cold and her nipples weren’t usually hard and on full display.

She looked between Harry and the cabin, weighing the odds of getting back inside, finding a jacket, and coming out again, all without the campers noticing. Even if she was wearing a bra, she knew that the chances of the whole endeavor working out were fairly slim. And Harry always had the softest sweatshirts.

“Uh, yeah. If you don’t mind?”

“Course I don’t.” He laughed as he pulled off his hoodie for her. “I would do anything, give you anything. You know that, YN.”

She slipped it on over her head, breathing in deeply when she thought he wouldn’t notice. His smell was so nice.

“Thanks,” she whispered.

Harry looked back at her, but she couldn't read his expression. He didn’t respond, just let his eyes meet hers. With a slight smirk, he tilted his head to the side but still stayed silent.

“What?” she giggled.

“Nothing.”

“That’s a lie.”

He sighed, but with a smile. “You’re right.”

She thought she had him trapped, but he still stayed quiet. Maybe it was the kids throwing it out only an hour earlier, or maybe it was being surrounded by his scent in his comfy hoodie, but YN might have tricked herself into believing that Harry was looking at her with something a little extra in his eyes. But she knew better.

“Well whatever it is, I’ll be here when you want to tell me.”

YN figured that he would share his thoughts with her eventually, he always did. She made sure he knew that he could trust her, that she would listen without judging and that everything said between them would stay between them.

She didn’t know that Harry was thinking about how good she looked in his clothes. About how he would like to see her walking around in one of his large t-shirts and no bra, socks on her cold feet as she walked around his apartment. About how in this particular sweatshirt she just looked so cozy and all he wanted to do was grab her and hold tight, cuddle under some blankets and fall asleep with a smile. About how she’s always on his mind these days. She didn’t know any of that.

But she listened as he continued on with something unrelated. He told her how Niall had convinced his campers that the dining hall staff actually have a way to measure which age group is eating the most vegetables, so they better eat more or else he could get fired for malnutrition. They sat down together on the cabin porch and he told her about how he had discovered a dusty old guitar in the back of the music room and spent a few hours trying to get it into tune, only to no avail. When an owl spoke up in the distance, she listened as Harry told her about the time a kid in his class when he was 8 years old who was obsessed with owls and talked about them incessantly, and to this day Harry can name random owl facts that he wished he didn’t know.

And she listened until Harry had bored himself, realizing that he had spent the entire time talking.

“Let’s talk about you, hm?” he offered.

YN shrugged. “What about? I’m not that exciting, H,” she laughed. “My campers think I’m lame unless I’m with you, I have no idea what life holds for me when the summer ends, and I haven’t even touched a boy since that guy last summer.”

“Yeah well,” Harry crossed his arms over his chest. “Liam was no good anyway.”

“He was fine, harmless, H,” she insisted.

“YN, seriously.” His tone lowered. “You keep calling him ‘that guy last year’ but he was your boyfriend. And he sucked.”

Sighing, YN took a few steps away from Harry, kicking a rock before turning back around to respond to him.

“Well first of all, he refused to suck, so write that down.” She looked up, expecting Harry to laugh at the joke but was only matched with a concerned face and a raised eyebrow, so she continued. “He just... he made me feel a little less alone, ok?”

“He took advantage of you, YN. He was only nice if he was sober and he told me he never liked you.”

“I know!”

Both of their eyes widened at her outburst, forgetting they were standing right outside a cabin of hopefully sleeping kids. They waited for a moment, expecting a voice to come from inside. After it was quiet for a moment, they continued.

“I know he took advantage of me, H. But no one had ever given me that kind of attention before, you know? He made me feel wanted, made me feel like maybe I could be loved because I could do something for him that no one else could. Made me feel like even if I was ok alone, maybe I didn’t have to be.”

“I know,” he answered softly, bringing a hand up to her arm and squeezing lightly. “But you don’t need that kind of attention, not from guys like that.” He paused for a moment, looking up at the sky before looking back at her.

Before he could open his mouth again, she filled the silence.

“But this is what I get, right? Men are trash and I let them in because I’m just a big dumpster fire?” She laughed at the end, looking down at her feet.

“YN, look at me.” When she didn’t, he got stronger. He softly grasped her jaw, forcing her attention back to him and bringing his other hand to rest on her waist. “Stop trying to make jokes to get out of this. You don’t need him, or anyone like him. You have me, and I’ll give you all the attention you want. I won't let you be alone anymore.”

She closed her eyes, breathing deeply as she processed his words.

She leaned her head into his large, supportive palm, and allowed his warmth to spread through her. YN was grateful it was late and there were no lights behind the cabins because if there were then Harry would have seen her blushing at his comment.

“I’m here, YN. I’m yours. Ok? I’m yours and you’re mine, and we’re going to be ok.”

He said it with finality, and YN didn’t want to fight him. Instead, she lunged forward arms first, grabbing around his torso tightly and tucking her head into his chest. From her spot against him, she could feel the puff of his breath as her body reached his with a bit of power behind it, and then the way his heart was beating a bit faster than usual.

He wrapped himself around her quickly, one arm around her waist and the other rubbing up and down her back softly. After a moment, he leaned down and pressed a kiss to the top of her head.

“I’m so lucky to have a friend like you, Harry.”

She was flattered that he felt so protective over her. So she listened as he talked about how much cared for her. And she listened as he talked about the standards she should be holding herself to. And she listened as he gave her a hard time for never taking her own advice. And she listened as he gave her comforting words, reminding her that she was worth so much more than she was allowing for herself.

And she listened when Harry checked his watch and realized he had ten minutes to get back to his cabin and get in bed before curfew.

The only thing she didn’t listen to was his insistence on her keeping his sweatshirt.

“I’m like five feet away from my bed, H. You need it more than I do.”

“Fine, but stargazing tomorrow, alright? Don’t forget.”

Not that she ever could.

. . .

The next day seemed to have dragged on for ages, even though she knew it was the same daily routine they had been following over the past three weeks. They did group activities, sports time, meals, electives, pool, shower time, and more group activities. But still, the day felt like it was never going to end, there was always something next other than spending alone time with Harry. She did see him literally all day and ate every meal sitting next to him as always, but looking forward to stargazing that night made the seconds tick by slower than ever. Bedtime couldn’t have come soon enough.

As the closing circle wrapped up and kids hugged each other goodnight, YN felt a firm but soft hand come to rest on her back.

“Click the walkie three times when you’re ready,” he whispered, reminding her of their code. “Meet me in the parking lot, ‘ve got a surprise.”

She could hear the lilt in his voice and knew without even looking that he was trying to hide his signature smirk. YN couldn’t for the life of her figure out what kind of surprise he might have in store for them, but the butterflies in her tummy came back in full force. Taking a breath, she nodded her head. Harry’s body was close enough that she could just barely get a whiff of that signature smell he carried around with him. She wanted to drown in it.

Back in the cabin, she waited for a while to help the girls get settled into bed. It was Sarah’s turn for bedwatch, so YN allowed her to take the lead on calming everyone down and getting them into bed. Before turning out the lights, she changed into comfortable clothes and grabbed her walkie-talkie from the shelf next to her bed.

“YN!” one of the campers whisper-yelled to her.

She whipped her head around until she spotted a camper on a top bunk lying with her head in her hands, watching YN. She walked over, resting a hand on the bunk.

“Where are you going tonight?”

YN couldn’t help but chuckle.

“Just on a little adventure. If I’m not back by morning, call the authorities... or call Harry,” she joked before turning back around.

“You’re going on an adventure with Harry?!” the camper cheered out.

Suddenly the calmness in the room was shattered as most of the campers were sitting up in bed, asking questions or yelling out reminders (specifically that if Harry ever let her touch his hair she was required to report back to them in vivid detail what it was like).

“I knew you were dating him!” the first camper called out again.

YN laughed under her breath as she gathered up her things for the evening. “I’m not dating him, he even told you himself, didn’t he?”

“But sometimes counselors lie,” the girl insisted.

YN pulled on a sweatshirt and grabbed her phone and walkie to put into her pockets.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, I’ve never told a lie in my life!”

She headed towards the door, but the campers were still eagerly chatting away about the situation. YN was grateful that it wasn’t her night to stay on bed watch, and Sarah would have to calm the kids back down now. After three nights in a row, she deserved the night off.

The staff parking lot was at the very bottom of the hill, meaning YN found herself walking through the entire camp. After all these years, she still found awe in the way camp looked at night after everyone had gone to bed. It was quiet in a different way than she was used to. And although she had every other night off from bed watch with the freedom to spend time by herself, she still found beauty in the eerie stillness of a place that was usually bustling with energy.

When she finally reached the lot, which was really more like an extra-wide dirt road with some dusty vehicles parked along the edge, she spotted Harry sitting on the trunk of his car, distracted by the phone in his hand. As she walked along the road, she laughed at the jokes and names and shapes that campers and staff alike had drawn into the dust-covered surfaces of the cars.

She watched as Harry finally looked up from his phone and spotted her walking towards him from about fifteen feet away. Maybe it was wishful thinking, but she could’ve sworn she saw his face light up at the realization.

“Well hello darling,” he greeted her softly.

YN took the last few steps towards him before hoisting herself up onto the trunk next to him.

“Hey H. Hope you haven’t been waiting too long. I know I sent the signal a while ago but then one of the girls asked where I was going tonight and when they found out I would be with you, all hell broke loose,” she giggled.

He looked back at her with a soft gaze, shaking his head.

“No such thing. Would wait hours for you, you know that.”

It was quiet for a moment before Harry coughed, bringing her attention back to him.

“So um, I’ve actually got a little something planned for tonight, if you’re alright with it. Still gonna stargaze! Just thought... y’know... maybe we could have a little fun along the way.”

She looked back at him quizzically.

“Uh right so, actually the surprise is in the car so...”

Harry jumped off of his perch before lending a hand to YN and helping her down as well. She watched him fish his keys out of his pocket and start opening the back end of the car.

“Hey, s’a surprise,” he insisted, urging her to giggle and turn away from him.

With her eyes closed, she could hear him opening the trunk, throwing a few things around, and closing it again. A few options of what it could be ran through her mind - some good food he’d smuggled in from his last day off, an extra one of his perfect-smelling sweatshirts, some candy he had confiscated from a camper.

“Are y’eyes closed?”

“Yes, Harry! Tell me what it is already!”

First, she heard him - his footsteps on the imperfect dirt road. Then she felt him - his breath on the back of her neck and his left hand resting on her waist. She held her breath.

“Alrigh’,” he whispered directly into her ear. “Open up.”

It took a few blinks for her eyes to readjust to the limited lighting they were under, but when she could get a clear picture again she couldn't help but smile wide. She turned around in his arms, laughing as she went.

“Harry! You snuck in alcohol?!” She gave him a little shove to his chest to punctuate her accusation.

Harry shrugged. “Yeah, brought it at the beginning of the summer but wanted to save it for something special. But any occasion with my girl is a special occasion. And I know for a fact that you haven’t had anything to drink yet this summer, even on your days off. You deserve to have some fun, so I’m not taking no for an answer.”

YN sighed, feigning discontent.

Harry just raised his brow, challenging her.

Ever the rule follower, the truth was she did feel guilty drinking during the summer even on days off. But Harry was right, it had been weeks. And if she was ever going to break a rule with someone it was going to be Harry. He always made those moments worth it.

“Fine, just this once though, ok?”

A giant smile spread across his face then as he knew he had won her over.

“You say that now, but I bet y’would drink again if it came with the bonus of spending time with me.”

“Bonus? Hanging out with you is like a chore at best,” she teased. “Now open that thing before I change my mind.”

Harry shook his head as he turned his attention to the bottle of cheap vodka in his hands. She would tease him for buying the off-brand as well, except that she knew what his salary was, because it was the same as hers, and it wasn’t nearly enough to validate buying the good stuff like she knew he preferred.

Once the lid was twisted off, he handed the bottle to her.

“Do the honors?”

“Wait, you don’t have any chaser, do you? Harry!”

He laughed again. “You get what you pay for, love. Now take a drink before I change my mind about sharing with yeh.”

She rolled her eyes before bringing the bottle up to her mouth. YN took a small sip before opening her mouth wide, sticking her tongue out, and making a disgusting noise that she would only ever allow Harry to hear.

“That wasn’t so bad, was it!” he insisted.

“Harry, I swear to god, if you ever make me drink straight vodka like that again-”

“Relax, babe,” he cut her off with a giggle. He turned back around and opened the trunk again, pulling out a bottle of juice and holding it up.

“Harry!”

“What! I just wanted to see if you would do it s’all.”

He grabbed a couple of plastic cups as well before closing the trunk and using it as a table. YN hopped back up to sit on it, swinging her legs back and forth against the back of the car as he mixed their drinks. They stayed there for a while, drinking together and chatting. It hadn’t been long since they had last talked, a few hours at most, but over their entire friendship, they had never once managed to run out of things to talk about. They traded stories of their nights out during the year away from each other. Most of YN’s involved her friends doing stupid things and her having to clean up the mess, and most of Harry’s had to do with his ex.

Harry was in the middle of telling a story about the time that he and his ex went to a bar, she lost exactly one shoe, and he spent twenty minutes crawling around on his hands and knees in the sticky bar looking for it only for her to remember she left it at their table.

“Hey, stop that,” YN interrupted.

“What? “ Harry raised his brow and took another sip of his drink.

“Stop talking about her. I don’t want to hear about her and I know you don’t want to talk about her.” She paused for a moment, pursing her lips and looking down at her feet before looking back up at him. “Alright, here’s the deal. No more mentions of her tonight, tonight is a fun night. And then we can pick a different time to sit around and be sad about her, alright?”

Harry seemed to think over the proposition for a moment before nodding his head. “I’ll do my best. ‘S hard though... spent nearly every day with her for six months.”

“You also spent time working and studying and doing things with friends, right?”

Again, he nodded.

“Great, tell me those things.”

“Fine, but not here.” He hopped off the car, grabbed his mixed drink in one hand and the half-empty bottle in the other, and started walking further down the dirt road away from the cabins and fields and program spaces and towards the hiking trails.

“You coming?” he called back over his shoulder.

YN followed his lead, hopping off the back of the car and jogging to catch up with him as they walked deeper into the forest. When they reached the first fork in the road, YN started naturally going right, but Harry stopped her.

“C’mon, let’s go this way,” he nodded to the left with his head.

“Towards the lake?”

“Yeah, why not?”

YN was a little confused at first. “Lake” was a strong word for the collection of smelly water hidden at the end of that trail. For years camp tried to clean it out and make it swimmable, or boatable, or even just not smell so bad. But every year they came back for the summer and it was exactly as disgusting as ever. Generations of campers and staff continued the legend that if you touched the water you would get a special rash that no one in the infirmary could heal. And when YN was a young camper, she swore she saw a dead fish floating around in it, but no one ever believed her.

But Harry looked determined, and YN trusted him, so she followed him anyway.

“Fine, but give me a refill,” she insisted, holding her cup out in front of him.

He gladly filled her cup and continued to lead her down the path. About five minutes in, YN realized how long it had been since she had gone this route. They no longer took campers to this spot anymore, not on purpose anyway. Which meant the last time she had been there must’ve been when she snuck out of her cabin as a teen. And that had to mean...

“Harry, are you taking me to our spot?” she asked softly.

He kept his focus straight ahead as he nodded.

“Yeah, thought it would be nice. S’alright, right?”

“Mhmm.”

There was an easy pause before Harry started up again telling a story of the time his friend accidentally picked up a stranger’s phone at a bar and got halfway home before realizing it. YN laughed along as they walked.

Truthfully, YN could listen to Harry talk for hours and never get bored. It didn’t even matter what he was saying. The sound of his voice was familiar and soothing, and the way he spoke sounded like a gentle melody from the birds or the waves crashing in the ocean. She had been known to completely zone out while he was talking, listening to the rhythm of his voice and entirely forgetting what the words coming out of his mouth actually meant.

Harry finished the story as they reached their destination, but YN almost didn’t even notice. She was so much more wrapped up in his presence next to her than what he was saying.

YN shivered as a cold wind blew through them.

“YN,” Harry said a bit sternly, “Did you forget to grab a jacket again?”

She shrugged.

“Here, take mine.” He placed his cup and the bottle on the ground carefully before taking his jacket off and draping it over YN’s shoulders. YN would never say no to getting to be wrapped up in Harry, even his clothes were close enough to the real thing.

The trail eventually opened up to a clearing overlooking the lake. Structures that had been built there in the past were worn down and weeds were growing in the center of an old fire pit. But off to the side still sat the small platform that YN remembered. Apparently at one point in time, it was used as a stage for campers to do talent shows, long before anyone had come up with naming them TUTS. But its only real use in YN’s memory was for lying on her back next to Harry and staring at the stars above.

They sat in the center of the platform together, cross-legged as Harry placed the bottle of vodka in between them.

“Alright,” he started with a sigh, hands landing on his knees. “We’re out of earshot of children for the first time in weeks, tell me what’s really on your mind.”

YN smiled but just shrugged. “What, like sex, drugs, and rock and roll?” she teased.

That had Harry giggling, which told YN he was definitely at least as tipsy as she was by that point.

“Ok, well the first one is sex, you go first.” she declared.

“I go? What do you mean I go? Like what do you want me to say?”

“Like, I don’t know. Tell me something I don’t already know. Like..” she stared out at the lake for a minute. “Ok, I’ve got one. Tell me a kink you have!”

“What?!” Harry said. “I’m not doing that, YN ask something else.”

But she crossed her arms and held firm, a pout on her face. “Nope, you have to answer, that’s the game.”

“What game?”

“I don’t know,” she admitted. “Just answer the question ok? You get to ask me one next.”

“Alright fine,” he eventually relented. He turned his body away from her to look straight ahead at the overgrown firepit and took another sip of his drink.

“What are you doing?”

“Don’t want to look you in the eye while I say it out loud.”

“Harry! That’s not fair! You totally have to look at me.”

“Fine,” he groaned, twisting around. “Just one, right?”

“You have more than one?” she raised her brows high.

He had a small smirk on his face as he darted his eyes, looking around everywhere except at her but not answering the question. “I really like... uh...”

“Out with it!”

“I really like being told I’m doing a good job, ok? I like... lots of compliments and nice words and honestly, the moaning counts too, because that means I’m doing, like, an extra good job.”

“So, a praise kink?” she clarified.

YN could see the blood rushing up to his cheeks even more than it already had, and it wasn’t because of the alcohol.

“Uh, yeah, I guess so.”

His fingers toyed with his lower lip, a nervous tick that YN was well acquainted with. She couldn’t believe he would even consider the idea that she might make fun of him for that.

“A praise kink is like, totally super normal. Tons of people like that shit,” she reasoned. “It’s kinda cute, actually.”

The words slipped out of her mouth before she could realize what she was saying. By the time it hit her that she had sort of called him cute, it was too late. But he was smiling back at her.

“Yeah? Y’think so?”

“Mhmm.” YN didn’t know what to say, looking down at her fingers in her lap and picking at her cuticles to distract herself. After the campers badgered him the night before she had meant to be extra careful with using those kinds of words around him unless she wanted to completely embarrass herself. But the alcohol made her loose-lipped and she couldn’t really help it.

He sat there in silence for a moment before finishing up the second half of his current drink.

“Wonder if you’d say the same thing when I get all possessive over you,” he said under his breath with a chuckle, refilling his cup.

YN’s eyes went wide for a moment.

“Alright, your turn,” he told her with renewed vigor, not giving her a chance to ask about what he had just blurted out. “Tell me something... oh, ok, I’ve got it. Tell me about the best fuck you ever had?”

“Ever?”

“Yeah. Who was it, what made it so good, spill.”

YN let out a breath. That was actually a pretty difficult question, considering her relative lack of experience. Harry talked like everyone had a sex life as extensive as his. She knew for a fact that he started having sex years before she did, and had heard plenty of stories from the other girls at camp about the experiences.

“What’s taking y’so long?” he whined.

She shrugged. “Dunno. Haven’t really had... I mean some times were better than others, yeah? But none really... stuck out as all that special, y’know?”

YN watched as Harry tipped his head to the side, curiously. “No, I have no idea. I remember all the special -” but he cut himself off mid-sentence. “Oh my god,” he gasped.

Now she was confused. “What?”

Harry just took another sip of his drink, chuckling as he swallowed. She hated when he did this, goading her on, teasing her with information. In the back of her head, YN knew he only did it because he liked to get her riled up. And as much as she didn’t want to let him win in his endeavor, she really had no choice in this situation. At least not with her lowered inhibitions and the feeling in her lower stomach that she was desperately trying to ignore.

“Harry!”

“No, I’m gonna make you say it.”

“Well, how can I say it if I don’t even know what you’re talking about.”

“Ok fine,” he relented. “I wanted you to admit that Liam was small. Probably didn’t even make you cum!” he teased.

“Yeah, well... he wasn’t the only one,” she grumbled, taking another sip out of her cup.

“You’ve been with other really small guys?”

“No, I mean...” she didn’t want to admit it, not to Harry of all people. But she supposed she made up the rules of the game and now she had to stick to them and actually answer everything. “I mean... no guy has ever made me... y’know... finish. I mean there was this one time where I thought maybe it happened but like, I know what it feels like and I just really liked the guy and was trying to convince myself he was making it happen.”

“Wait, really? Never?”

“Never by a guy... no,” she admitted.

She felt small under his gaze, but not because of what he was saying or doing. Just the knowledge that he had so many partner-induced orgasms that he had to specify a favorite. And on top of that, he knew for a fact that he was at least good at fingering girls because he had fingered Rachel L down by the gazebo three summers ago and everyone found out. All of that combined and YN felt like she could never compare, not to Harry, not to his ex, not to anyone. She was better off staying alone, like she always had been, like she probably always would be.

“Hey, hey, don’t be sad. We’ll make sure it happens for you,” he assured her, placing a comforting hand on her thigh.

“We?” She looked from his hand to his eyes.

Harry paused for a few seconds, then nodded. “Yeah, of course ‘we’, who do you think I am? Dream Team, remember? Gonna make sure your dream comes TRUE this summer.”

YN couldn’t keep from laughing at that.

“Ok your turn,” she declared.

“Shoot.”

“How big is your dick?”

Harry scoffed. “Tell you for a fact that I’m bigger than Liam from last year, and the guy from high school.”

“You’re just saying that!”

“Fine, fine. You really wanna know that bad?”

She had always been a tiny bit curious, but now that he was playing his little game and trying to hold the information back, YN was literally going to explode if he didn’t tell her.

“Well now I do, yeah.”

“Alright, it’s... well it’s about this thick around and this long...when I’m hard... on a good day.”

He showed her the measurements with his hands, and her drunken mind was in awe. There was no doubt in her swirling mind by then that he was anything like anyone she had ever been with. The idea of someone that big? He had to be bigger than any vibrator she currently owned (very well hidden away inside her suitcase under her bed and behind all her shoes so no one would find them). The image of him stretching her out as she had always hoped to experience one day was painted on the inside of her eyelids. It would probably hurt a little at first, and he would groan as she shifted her body to adjust to him. He would tell her how tight she was in between thrusts and she would feel so full - maybe even feel him all the way in her tummy when he came inside of her.

Harry laughed.

Her eyes went wide as she realized she had actually sat there and asked Harry about his dick then closed her eyes and imagined it right in front of him. The alcohol was clearly starting to get to her. He started pouring himself a refill, not giving YN time to fully recuperate after learning this new information.

“Ok, your turn. When was the last time you had a real orgasm and who were you with? Or I guess... what were you thinking about?”

He asked it so casually. And on the one hand, of course he did, that’s the game they were playing. But on the other hand, YN could feel the butterflies flying around her tummy because she knew what the answer was going to have to be.

“I... I mean I do it a few times a week, the last time was yesterday.”

She stopped short, but his gaze never left her.

“And you were thinking about...?”

She sighed. YN really didn’t want to have to come out and say it. Harry was her best friend and she didn’t want to make it weird. If he got all weird and looked at her differently after she told him, well she didn’t think she could survive the rest of the summer like that. It would be such a stupid reason to have to break up the dream team anyway. Even if he didn’t make it weird, she probably would. YN was already embarrassed by the way her campers talked about her and Harry, she didn’t need to add any fuel to the fire.

But, she was exactly intoxicated enough to not be able to think of a reasonable lie and the liquid courage took over instead.

“I was thinking about...Uh... well... you,” she finally admitted.

Harry put the alcohol down on the platform quickly before looking over to YN. She couldn’t read his face. He didn’t say anything, not right away at least, and she could feel the blood rushing to her cheeks as she did her best to look away from him rather than melt under his gaze. She had ruined it, hadn’t she? All these years of friendship and she messed it all up with one drunken admission and now she was going to be miserable. He knew something he was never, ever supposed to know.

“Hey,” he started, letting his hand rest on her thigh to get her attention. “S’not weird.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, ‘s like... s’a compliment, right? We’ve all thought about people while doing that. And at least it was someone I approve of.” He paused for a moment, appearing to be deep in thought before cracking a smile again. “I want to know how you had time at camp!”

She giggled at that. It was clear to her that Harry was trying to make her feel as comfortable as possible, which only fed into the mushy melting feeling she had inside of her chest while looking at him.

“During my hour off, Styles. Geez, you’re an amateur.” She finished up her drink as an emphasis to her point, Harry chuckling beside her.

YN reached out for the nearly empty bottle of vodka, only for Harry to swipe it out of her grasp.

“Harry!”

“Come on, love. I think you’ve had enough.

She let out a little ‘hmph’, sparking a little laugh from Harry as he set the bottle on the other side of the platform.

“You’re just doing that because you don’t want me to see you get any harder,” she insisted.

Harry coughed, clearly taken back by her comment. “You... I... what?”

“Well you’re really bad at hiding how turned on you are,” she said with a shrug, pointing towards the obvious bulge in the front of his sweatpants. Of course, she had been trying to ignore it, but with his size, how could she? In her slightly drunken state, she tried her best not to think of what specifically had turned him on to that point. She tried to remember that there was no way he could be attracted to her or something she said. So, therefore, it must be an alcohol thing, right?

Harry clearly didn’t want to address the situation at hand, so instead, he tried to change the subject. By this point, YN wasn’t sure if it was the alcohol or the late hour and lack of sleep that was making them delirious, but either way, she just couldn't stop laughing. And neither could he. Everything one of them said was the most hilarious thing in the world.

“I saw a whale one time,” Harry told her, sitting up proud.

“A whale! Oh my gosh, a whale! No one has ever, in the history of the entire world, seen a whale before!” she teased.

He shoved her lightly by the shoulder before finally looking at his watch.

“Oh shit, we better get back. Gotta get you to bed, don’t even wanna know what you’ll be like in the morning if I let you stay out any longer.”

. . .

“You look like shit.”

“Thanks, Styles, just what every girl wants to hear. Such a way with words.” YN shoved him a bit as she came up next to him at the coffee station during breakfast.

His face broke out in a smile, dimples and all, as he finished stirring his coffee. She rolled her eyes, reaching toward the stack of coffee cups. But he pushed her arm aside.

“Here, I made this for you. Figured you’d need it after last night... plus I noticed there was only a drop of that non-dairy creamer you like left.”

YN felt a soft smile break out across her face, and she recognized a look in Harry’s eyes that she had seen in the past but couldn’t quite decipher.

“Thanks, H.”

“Of course.”

It was quiet between them for a moment, but not in an uncomfortable way. She just so genuinely appreciated him and the things he would do for her. The little things - like making her coffee exactly the way she liked it because he was worried the creamer would run out prior to her getting there. Or making sure she got to bed on time to get enough sleep. Checking in whenever he could tell she was feeling sad, or planning a fun day off for the two of them because he knew she needed it. One time in the winter he even ordered a delivery meal for her, from all the way across the ocean. He always took such good care of her.

“Scuse me,” Niall pushed his way in between them, breaking YN out of her thoughts.

Harry grabbed another cup to make his own coffee, which he took with no creamer and only one sugar. YN shifted her weight to one side as she watched him, realizing that if he didn't use a creamer, he had no reason to notice that it was almost empty. Maybe the bottle was in his way and we went to move it and that’s how he noticed? Or maybe whoever had made coffee right before told him it was running low?

They walked together to sit at the end of a table, their campers a good six feet away and too preoccupied with each other to notice or care what their counselors were doing.

YN took a sip of her coffee, looking across the table at Harry again. She might look like a disaster after a bit of drinking the previous night, but he looked as perfect as ever. His hair looked fluffy and soft, curls in the front highlighted by the summer sun and reminiscent of cinnamon rolls. His eyes were bright, and focused, and didn’t have any bags. And his shirt displayed his broad shoulders and muscular yet comforting arms in precisely the perfect way. It wasn’t fair, really, that he could be up late drinking and still look like that in the morning.

She knew she had been a little loose-lipped that night, and it’s not that she didn’t trust him. It’s just that... she never meant for him to know some of those things. He didn’t need to know that no guy had ever gotten her off, or that she thought of him while she touched herself sometimes. They were good friends, of course, but even still there were some things you always keep to yourself.

“So about last night...” she started, softly so no one could overhear them. Harry raised his brows, urging her to continue. “That stuff we said...it stays between us, right?”

“‘Course,” Harry answered easily, taking another sip of his own coffee. “You can always trust me, you know that.”

“I know it’s just...” she sighed, looking away from him for a moment. “I never really meant to tell you those things. I said it because I was... well... your surprise and all..” She didn’t want to say out loud that she was a bit drunk, just in case a camper or other staff could overhear her. It would be grounds for getting fired.

“YN,” he started softly. “It’s ok. I won't tell anyone anything. Hey, look at me.” He tipped his head to the side, reaching his hand across the table to rest on hers in an attempt to draw her attention back to him. “I’m on your team, always.”

She could feel herself blush at that, but she couldn’t make herself look away. His eyes were so clear and gentle, and she knew he meant every word he was saying. It wasn’t that she doubted he would keep her secrets, it was just that she needed reassurance that everything was going to be ok. That nothing had changed between them and he wouldn’t treat her any differently. That he valued her the same way he always had, and always would. His answer went further than that, though, telling her she could rely on him always. His words, the look in his eyes, the way he spoke to her outside her cabin a couple of nights ago, it’s like he was telepathically giving her a giant, warm, cozy hug. She desperately wanted one for real, but knew this wasn’t the time or place.

Before their conversation could go any further, one of YN’s campers came up to her asking to be taken to the infirmary.

“Duty calls.”

As they walked away, the camper whispered “are you dating him though? You can tell me, I’ll keep it a secret, I promise!”

. . .

“Nah, you’re way too good for Niall. Trust me, I saw him wear the same underwear two days in a row once,” Harry laughed.

It was later in the morning, and both YN and Harry’s cabins were having their turn at the ropes course. On the short hike through the trees, the two of them walked side by side, chatting as always. He had asked her if she had her eye on anyone this summer - she didn’t really, but she started listing other counselors that she thought were cute enough. Apparently, she gave the wrong answer.

“You asked who I thought was cute though - and he is. That doesn’t mean I’m like, in love with him or gonna make a move or anything.”

“I just don’t want to see you get hurt. Want you to be happy. And he’d make you happy for a few minutes but not... not much longer.”

“So you’re saying he can’t last?”

“No! I’m saying - are you running out of breath?”

They were almost halfway there, and YN started getting tired and her breathing sped up. Harry noticed right away.

“Drink some water, babe,” he told her.

“Forgot my water bottle.”

“Have some of mine.”

When they arrived at the ropes area, the boys and girls split off to do their activities separately. It started with team-building activities for the kids on the ground, getting them comfortable with some of the equipment and learning to work together. The boys were having trouble, arguing with each other so Harry, Niall, and Adam, the ropes staff, kept having to cut in and calm them down. But YN’s girls were in their own little world, working through the problems together and finishing some of them in record time.

That’s how the girls ended up getting to climb the rock wall, climbing tower, and actual ropes course first. And everything was going well for a while - the climbing wall wasn’t very tall and there was a lower point on the tower that the kids could stop at if they were really afraid of heights. Plus they were secure in harnesses and connected to ropes managed by some pretty strong staff members.

It was the on ropes course itself that there was some trouble. It hung up high in the trees, roughly 30 feet above where they were standing. The ropes were old, and from the distance, the kids thought they looked a bit worn down. Plus, the first section required partner work, and even with the team building and safety measures, most of the kids were pretty worried. YN reassured them over and over again that if they could do the earlier team-building activities together, then working with a partner to walk across the rope bridge should be a piece of cake! But it was to no avail.

Then Adam had the amazing idea of putting YN in a harness and having her demonstrate to the campers how to do it. He had to stay on the ground as part of the safety rules, Sarah was on her hour off, and she couldn’t be partners with a camper, so that’s how she and Harry ended up perched on top of a poll, 30 feet or so off the ground, attached with carabiners and ropes.

YN held onto the pole so tightly, her knuckles were turning white. She kept looking down, even though she knew not to. And Harry could see the way she was nervously shaking her leg.

“You’re not actually afraid of doing this, are you?” he asked her softly, so no one on the ground could hear.

YN shrugged. It wasn’t that she was afraid of heights, per se, and she knew if she fell the harness and ropes system would catch her. But the ropes course hadn’t existed when she was a camper and she had never actually tried it. They had the chance during staff training week before the campers arrived, but she and Harry opted to test out some of the new guitars instead. She had no real reason to be afraid, but the concept of a ropes course, in general, is quite daunting.

Harry’s face dropped when he realized that she was, in fact, a bit scared. He reached out, touching her arm lightly to get her attention.

“Hey, it’s ok. I’m right here. I’ll never let anything happen to you, ok?”

His voice was soft but strong, and YN found herself holding her breath for a moment before finally releasing it and nodding her head. Harry would be right there. He would be holding her and guiding her across the bridge, and everything would be ok.

“Dream Team, right? We can do anything. We can do this,” he assured her again.

“Ok...yeah...ok.” She didn’t sound very convincing, not even to herself. And she could tell from the look on Harry’s face that he wasn’t convinced either. But Adam called out from down below and started giving Harry directions on how to get to the platform in the middle of the bridge.

He looked at her one last time, taking a deep breath and following the instructions. She didn’t want to look down, so instead she focused on his arms, muscles working hard as he lifted himself further up the pole, across a hanging log, and back down to the platform.

“Now there’s nowhere for her to put her hands for balance,” Adam explained from the ground. “So Harry is going to have to do that for her. Harry!” he called out. “Put out your hands so she can reach for them, and YN go ahead and step onto the first rope on the bridge.”

Looking down at her feet, YN could feel herself becoming nauseous. It was a long way down, and even if the ropes caught her the harness was really uncomfortable, and it would be so embarrassing in front of the kids. She silently wished she hadn’t agreed to this, not realizing how intimidating it would be until she was already at the top of the pole and it was too late.

“YN,” Harry whispered, arms stretched out in front of him. “I’ve got you.”

She took a deep breath and used one leg to test the first rope of the bridge. There was some slack, and she would definitely be needing Harry’s help. That was the point of the activity, after all. Placing each of her hands in his, she looked back up at him.

“Are you sure you’re ready?” she asked

“Always.”

Nodding her head, she took the first step. YN wobbled quite a bit, but Harry’s strong arms stayed constant to support her. His hands were warm and solid, comforting and secure. With her feet spread wide, she was able to find her balance and control her breathing. He squeezed her hands, causing her to look up so he could smile at her.

“See how she’s distributing her weight across the rope and not in one spot?” Adam pointed out the campers, who all nodded. “And he’s got his knees bent for a stronger stance so he can give her extra support. Alright, YN, whenever you’re ready you can take the next two steps and get to the center platform.”

Lost in a trance, YN was staring at the ropes in front of her, part of her brain trying to figure out how to approach the next challenge and part of it was trying to convince herself that she was going to be ok.

“The first one’s always the hardest,” Harry insisted, drawing her attention back to him. “Everything from here is easy.”

They worked together, her relying heavily on his strong, sturdy arms to make her way across. With each step, she got closer to him. Her hands moved from his hands to his forearms. She could feel how tense his arms were, but his face looked so relaxed. His soft, warm skin supported her as she moved to the third rope, hands now moving to his biceps. And she knew he was strong, she knew he had muscles, but she had never taken the time to really appreciate them and feel them in this way. His upper arms were dense and sturdy, and her grasp didn’t fit as far around them as she expected. Finally, she reached for his shoulders and made it to the center platform, letting out a sigh of relief.

That was, until she realized exactly how small that platform was, clearly built for children and not for two grown adults.

“Here lemme just...”

Harry placed his hands on her waist, pulling her close to him and then rotating them both to get her across to the other side of the small platform. He was focused, looking down at their feet as she trusted him to maneuver their bodies.

Down below, YN could barely make out Adam explaining something to kids. She took a moment and looked into Harry’s eyes. When he finished rotating them, he looked up at her and smiled.

“See, Dream Team.”

“Yeah,” she let out a huff. “Something like that.”

Her hands rested softly on his shoulders still, his securely on her waist. The entire fronts of their bodies were touching from their chests all the way down to their toes. He held her close to him, and she wasn’t entirely sure if they needed to be as close as they were. But she didn’t mind, and judging by his soft smile, neither did he.

“I’ve got you, YN. You know that, right? I’ve always got you.”

She nodded her head, taking another breath and looking behind her at the other half of the bridge. If she did the first half she could surely do the second. It would just be a bit more difficult with Harry behind her rather than in front of her.

“Alright guys!” Adam shouted up at them. “Good job switching positions but now YN needs to turn around so she’s facing the second side of the bridge!”

YN felt Harry’s hands, still on her waist, as he turned her around. Their bodies still touched as they were confined to the small space, and she could swear she could feel his breathing on the back of her neck. He squeezed her lightly.

“Call me selfish,” he started, just loud enough for her to hear but not loud enough for anyone on the ground, “But I’m so glad I was here to be your partner. Wouldn’t want anyone else holding you close like this.”

She swallowed hard. What was that supposed to mean? Did he really enjoy holding her close? Did she like the way it felt to be close to him? Blood rushed up to her cheeks and she was grateful that she was already facing away from him so he wouldn’t be able to see.

Before she could respond, Adam called up to them, instructing how to take the next step off the platform.

She didn’t really pay much attention to anything that happened after that, risking her own safety to flip his words over and over in her head. Hours later and she still couldn’t get the comment out of her mind. Wouldn’t want anyone else holding you close like this. Why would he say that? Would someone else holding her close mean that Harry would get jealous? Wouldn’t want anyone else holding you close like this. Did she like being close to him like that? Did he like it just as much? Wouldn’t want anyone else holding you close like this. After all those years as friends, as pretty much the only girl he never tried to get with, did something change?

She thought about it when he cheered for her after she made it to the end of the ropes course, a task she couldn’t have completed without him, literally. And she thought about it when he sat at the top of the waterslide during pool time, counting 15 seconds in between each kid to keep them safe and listening as they called silly things out to hear the echo. She thought about it again when she convinced her most stubborn camper to take a shower because honestly, people were starting to notice. Then she thought about it when supervising field time and watching Harry teach some of the boys how to properly throw a frisbee. She even thought about it when the kids were at their elective time and the counselors were in their daily team staff meeting with Mitch going over the schedule for the next day.

And it was still on her mind when the meeting ended and their daily hour off started. She walked up to Harry out of instinct, but soon realized she didn’t quite know what to say. Which was quite out of character for her, since she and Harry had pretty much never run out of things to talk about. They had talked earlier about sneaking into the kitchen and stealing some of the good snacks ahead of distrubution, but she had other more urgent things on her mind. Biting her lip, she looked up at him. But before she could get anything out, he stopped her.

“I’m just gonna take some time to myself in the cabin today if you don’t mind postponing our snack burglary,” he teased.

“Oh, yeah,” she said softly. “Enjoy yourself.”

This of course left YN with an entire hour to herself, which normally was something she relished, but on this day she so desperately wanted to be distracted and stop thinking of what he had told her. Harry was her best friend, and she shouldn’t be spiraling over something as simple as this. A few words shouldn’t be affecting her this much.

They hadn’t always been this close, though. Both started going to camp when they were pretty young, at an age where the girls and the boys didn’t really mingle all that much. She knows for a fact that they were in the same age group for several summers, but she had absolutely no memory of him ever existing.

Then they got a bit older, and middle school came around. YN does have memories of Harry during this time, but they were mostly from a distance. He was always so cool and exciting and popular, and she was just kind of there. He was foreign and had an accent and fluffy hair and sparkly eyes, and she just kind of existed. Harry was always kind to her, but not in a way that was any different from how he treated everybody. He was always helping people when they fell down or thanking the lunch ladies even if they made burnt grilled cheese for the third time in a row.

It was in high school when things started to change. Harry went from being only that sweet, cute, British boy over there to being the one all the girls - and some of the boys - were fawning over. YN knows for a fact that he was at least three different girls’ first kiss in one summer, because she was actually present when all three happened (truth or dare, at a campfire, and behind a tree while they were supposed to be playing capture the flag). And if she remembered correctly, Harry soaked it all up. He didn’t brag, the other boys did enough of that for him. But he preened in the attention and accepted his role.

It was after YN had resigned to ignore her quiet little crush and make friends with Harry that they got so close. And eventually, they were practically inseperable. Harry even helped YN decide on a college, and then classes, and then a major. He never told her what to do but he was a great listener and always asked the right kinds of questions to get her thinking until she could come up with an answer she was confident in. He reminded her that school and work would never be her entire life, but they would be the way that she spends a lot of her time. And no one should spend that amount of their time miserable. And that was really the theme - he just wanted to make her happier. He pushed her to go out with friends more often and go on spontaneous adventures and learn about things she was actually passionate about - all from thousands of miles away.

In the past two years, they had spoken nearly every day - either over the phone or by texting, though Harry always preferred to actually hear her voice. They would stay on the phone until late at night talking about whatever was on their minds and on more than one occasion YN had a roommate bang on the wall to get her to quiet down. Sometimes she even got to fall asleep to the sound of his voice. They talked about their days, or their jobs, or their families. They talked about the universe like they used to do under the stars at camp. They talked about relationships and what they wanted in a partner. She knew all about his girlfriend, who he was really smitten with for a long time. They had no real secrets between them, none that she knew of anyway. Besides, she had kind of spilled the beans in the only category she was really keeping to herself the other night after drinking.

And if they didn’t have any secrets, then it should be easy to have a conversation with him about what he said up on the ropes course, right? She should be able to walk right into his cabin and say “Hi Harry, What did you mean when you said you wouldn’t want anyone else holding me close? Has something changed between us?”

So without thinking over it any harder, she marched right down to his cabin with the intention to do just that. Walked down to the boys’ village where she wasn’t technically supposed to be (but there were no campers around so it was fine) and threw open the door without knocking. No secrets.

Except, maybe they should have some secrets. Like it probably could have stayed a secret that Harry had his cock in his hand, his computer beside him playing a video, and soft moans coming out of his mouth. YN probably didn’t need to know that he was turned on by watching a video of shower sex. Or that he liked to alternate between fast and slow strokes. Or that he spit directly on his dick for lubrication.

YN probably could have gone her whole life without knowing those things.

But it was too late. By the time she yelled “Oh my god!” and turned around with her eyes closed, she already knew too much.

Harry slammed his computer shut and yelled out several expletives. She could hear him moving around on his bed searching for his shorts and pulling them on. And then she could hear silence.

A silence that had never really existed between them before. And it lasted for what seemed like an eternity.

Eventually, Harry coughed. “You uh... you can turn around, if you’d like.”

He sounded scared.

YN took a deep breath before turning around, waiting another couple of seconds, and finally opening her eyes. The view in front of her this time was much more than what she was used to - Harry, sitting on his bed, fully clothed, fluffing his pillow to give himself something to do. It still wasn’t completely normal, as she couldn’t help but notice he was still completely hard beneath the loose-fitting shorts, which were doing nothing to try to hide that fact anyway.

At first, she opened her mouth to speak, but nothing really came out. She wanted to say she was sorry. She wanted to pretend none of this ever happened. She wanted to make a bad joke that would distract them from the issue at hand and allow them to move on without discussing it further. But that’s not what she said.

When she finally spoke, she only mustered up, “Were you just touching yourself?”

“No,” Harry deadpanned.

Which, like, was obviously a joke but considering the situation YN was too afraid to say anything.

“YN you literally told me last night that this is the time in the day where you do this. I told you I wanted to spend some time alone and you didn’t put that together?”

“Well, I... I was thinking about other things,” she admitted with a shrug.

She looked up at Harry, desperately trying not to look at his lower half but it was a pretty tall order. He raised a brow, asking her to continue.

“I was thinking about you...” she started. And she was going to say she was thinking about what he said earlier in the day, she really was. But he jumped in first.

“So was I... about you! I mean. Not myself. That would be... I have an ego but it’s not that bad.”

And that... was definitely not what YN was expecting to hear.

“Really? Me? While you were...?” she asked softly, feeling somehow afraid of the answer. Because if he really was thinking about her, that meant even more than his little remark on the rope bridge. It would mean that they had both thought of each other in that moment. It could mean... a lot.

Harry shrugged, “yeah.” And it wasn’t fair, really, that he was able to brush this off like no big deal and she was still standing there feeling like there was a spotlight pointed directly at her with a ticking time bomb getting ready to go off somewhere in the background.

“Oh,” was all she managed to get out.

“It doesn’t have to be weird... you told me yesterday you thought about me so I figured...”

“No, yeah, I mean. Not weird at all,” she lied.

“Ok, good.” Harry let out a big sigh, looking down at himself. “I uh... I’m kinda...”

“Oh, right, yeah. I’ll um... I’ll let you take care of that. I’ll see you... later?”

She started to leave, but not without hearing Harry under his breath say “Maybe you’ll help me out next time.”

. . .

That night for cabin time, YN and Sarah tried to wear out the campers by having a glow stick dance party. Unfortunately, all it seemed to do was rile them up further. The amount of energy stored inside 11 and 12-year-olds' bodies seemed limitless. And the little one broke a glow stick and got it all over her fingers, which meant she got it all over her bed, which meant YN had to spend 20 minutes helping her clean it before turning out the lights.

It felt like it took ages for them to actually quiet down and start to go to sleep. She had to resort to playing an old meditation story so they would at least stay quiet enough to hear and hopefully, maybe, eventually drift off. While the story was playing Sarah left for her night off and YN stayed behind on bedwatch. She heard the walkie click three times - her code with Harry that it was time to chat - but the girls were definitely still awake so she had to wait. To kill the time, she cleaned up the floor, refolded her clothes, and pushed her suitcase further under her bed. Anything to give her something to do so her mind wouldn’t wander too far.

This day had been... a lot. Just in 24 hours, YN felt as if everything had changed between her and Harry, and she was terrified of it. A new door had opened in their relationship and she still didn’t know what any of it meant.

The meditation story eventually ended, and YN let out a breath of relief when she could hear the sounds of steady breathing. To be safe, she turned on another story as she grabbed her walkie and carefully slipping out the door.

She took her seat just outside the cabin, checking to make sure no one was within earshot, and clicked the walkie three times, biting her lip as she waited for a response. YN had never been this nervous to talk to Harry. Everything was always so easy with him. Conversation came naturally and she trusted him so deeply. But now, everything was confusing.

It wasn’t long until Harry’s soft, calming voice came across the radio.

“Hey darlin’,” he whispered, likely sitting directly outside his own cabin. “Was afraid you weren’t gonna wanna talk to me tonight.”

YN furrowed her brows. “That’s crazy, H. Why wouldn’t I want to talk to you? Things get so boring here.”

“Oh so I’m only good for my entertainment value?”

“Obviously.”

She smiled softly.

There were so many things YN wanted to say to him at that moment, but none of them seemed quite right. She was scared of what he might say, what might change, what all of it could mean. She was scared that he would be scared and then she would be alone again. So instead she figured the safer conversation would be the one she owed him anyway, which would remind him of where they really stood.

“Anyway, I know I cut you off from talking about... her... last night, and that wasn’t really fair. So if you want to think out loud, or vent, or whatever, I’m here for you to do that tonight.”

Harry sighed through the speaker.

“Yeah I... I guess I probably should talk about her some, to get it out, right?”

It was hard for YN to listen to Harry talk about his ex, but as his friend, she knew it was the right thing to do for both of them (because also maybe it would remind her not to get her hopes up too high about him). He had been carrying some of this around for so long, and she could see the look in his eyes when the campers asked him if he had a girlfriend and knew that he was still feeling some sort of pain. It had been over a month now since they broke up, but he had been sharing his concerns about her with YN for much longer.

When they first got together, Harry seemed so genuinely happy. He was always telling stories of his time with her - going on adventures, seeing new places, meeting new people. She brought out something special in him that no one he had previously been with seemed able to do. He seemed relaxed around her and YN could hear his smile through the phone while he talked about her. He was happy, and so YN was happy for him.

Harry would acknowledge that something changed around the time Camille’s lease was up and she started suggesting either moving in together or moving out of town. But he didn’t know that making that decision was just the start of it. He didn’t know that Camille had called YN up one day (Harry had given them each other’s numbers and they texted occasionally, but only in reference to him) and practically threatened her to stay away from Harry. She claimed YN was taking up too much of Harry’s time and it wasn’t normal for someone in a relationship to be that close and talk that often with another girl. She was convinced he was “emotionally cheating” on her with YN.

And to be honest, YN was a bit intimidated by Camille at first. She had a strong presence, a loud voice, and sounded serious on the phone. But when Harry called her the next day, she realized how ridiculous that was. Anyone who supports Harry should support all of him, including his other friendships and relationships. Hell, YN was supporting his relationship with Camille because it made him happy. So she wasn’t surprised that shortly after that conversation, Harry started mentioning things getting weird between the two of them.

When he flat out rejected the idea of moving in together (“six months is a long time but it’s also not that long. Not long enough to make entire life decisions based on”) Camille was furious. She still tried to convince him to move out of town with her, and he did seriously consider it for a while. He felt pretty selfish when he decided to stay, but YN would remind him that if he was making a decision based on what he thought would make him happiest, then he had no reason to feel anything but confident in his choice.

Apparently, that wasn’t enough for Camille to end things with him, but she definitely held onto the anger. They stopped going on dates, stopped seeing friends together, and their conversations ran stale. Harry complained to YN that she had turned into a fuck buddy, the exact habit he was trying to escape. She would come over, eat dinner, watch an episode of tv, fuck, and then leave without so much as a cuddle. That was the hardest part for YN to hear about - their sex life. He never went into detail but even the fact that he acknowledged it existing was difficult to hear - partially because of her old crush and partially because of her own lack of sex life.

“I’m so glad camp started when it did,” he admitted. “I don’t think I would’ve had the courage to leave her otherwise.”

“Sure you would’ve,” YN insisted. “You always do what you know is right.”

“Maybe...” he sounded pensive. “Sometimes I... sometimes I miss out on opportunities and regret it later.”

“Like what?”

“Like... well it’s not important. The point is she went from being my girlfriend to a fuck buddy and it sucked.”

“Hey - at least she sucked in a good way, right?” YN teased.

Harry groaned on the other end.

“That was terrible.”

“I know, but I’m absolutely not sorry at all.”

“Ok but, the last thing I want to think about right now is doing that with... her. I’d much rather talk about you.”

“What about me? We talked about my sexual shortcomings last night, there’s not much else you don’t already know.”

“Just... tell me what’s on your mind? I’m done talking about her. She’s old news and honestly, I feel like a robot when I talk about her now. I miss having a person, but I don’t miss her. ‘Sides, you’re my person now.”

He said it so easily, it wasn’t even fair. YN was grateful that he couldn’t see her and the way the blood rushed to her cheeks as he admitted that she was his person. The sentiment wasn’t anything new, but hearing him say it so bluntly like that... brought back her swirling thoughts from earlier in the day.

“There’s a lot on my mind.”

“Like what?”

YN took a deep breath. They were beyond the point of no return, there was nothing she could say to him that would be any more embarrassing than anything that they had experienced in the last day. So she might as well be honest.

“Been thinking a lot about you, H.”

“Oh. Like.. have you been...after you saw me were you....doing it and...”

“No!” she quickly cut him off, knowing what he was insinuating. “Not that I wouldn’t...or that I would? I just... ugh.”

Harry chuckled through the walkie. “It’s alright YN, tell me what you were thinking then.”

“Was thinking... well, earlier I was thinking about what you said this morning, on the ropes. That you wouldn’t want anyone else to hold me close. What.... what did you mean?”

“I meant... I meant what I said. Had an excuse to hold you close, and if I saw anyone else doing that with you I would’ve... well... I don’t know, YN. I’m selfish, I get jealous, and you’re mine.”

“I’m yours?”

“Yeah, my person, my dream team, all that. Wanna just... just keep you all to myself sometimes, yeah?”

“Harry, we spend all day every day together.”

“I know. And I like that. I like... I like having you with me. You make me smile, and... you’re safe. And holding you close like that this morning... it was nice. Wanna do that more. But maybe on the ground and not 30 feet in the air with 20 little kids staring up at us,” he laughed at the end.

YN let out a small laugh, but she was too deep in thought for it to sound genuine.

“Does this mean... Harry, has something changed between us?”

The silence while she waited for an answer seemed to last for an eternity. What had she done? Asking him so forward like that? But everything he was saying, it was so... sweet. And it made the butterflies in her tummy flutter bigger than they had in years. Her mind was swirling with possibilities, the good and the bad.

He liked holding her close. Would he hold her close in bed, for a nice cuddle? Would he stroke his hands through her hair while they watched tv? Would he squeeze her too tight in his sleep, just by instinct, forcing her to wiggle away from him? What if her wiggling woke him up? Would he have a cute, sleepy, pouty face as he opened his eyes, grabbing his hands out to nothing until she relented and moved back into his grasp? Would he kiss her goodnight before tucking his head into her neck and letting out soft little snores?

Or would he be completely appalled and offended that she had even asked the question? Maybe he would laugh and say something to remind her that he would never see her romantically. She could never be more than a friend to him, always having to push her little crush into the back of her mind so it wouldn’t bother anyone. Because that’s what it was, wasn’t it? An embarrassing little childhood crush that had never quite faded away. He would connect the dots, after her admission last night, and the questions she asked him today, and he would no longer feel so safe and comfortable with her. He would put space between them like they were young again and she would lose her best friend.

“Of course not, don’t be silly. I’ve always felt this way about you, YN, you should know that. Well, maybe not always but a really long time.”

“Oh.”

YN wasn’t quite sure what to make of that answer. He wasn’t exactly declaring his love for her, but he wasn’t pushing her away either. He was just... continuing on with what they already had. And that had to be good enough YN.

She wanted to ask him what he meant about ‘feeling this way’. She wanted to ask what the future was going to look like. She wanted to ask if she was ever going to have a chance or if he would just be a soft, lovey-dovey best friend forever.

But she didn’t ask.

“Me too,” she responded softly instead of any of the questions running through her mind.

“Good... I’m... I’m really lucky to have you in my life, YN.”

In the short silence, she heard Niall’s voice distantly in the background from the radio.

“Ah, Niall’s back. Should probably head to bed anyway. See you in the morning.”

“Yeah...see you.”

YN went back into the cabin then, closing the door as softly as she could. But as soon as she did, one of the campers sat straight up.

“YN!” she whisper-shouted.

“Shh... you’ll wake everyone up. What do you need?”

The camper rubbed her eyes before answering. “You were talking to Harry.”

“Yes...”

“I don’t know what he said, but I heard his voice. He has a nice voice...”

“Yes, he does,” YN smiled. “But it’s late. Harry went to sleep and I’m going to now. You should be asleep too.”

“Ok,” she answered softly, lying back down on her bed.

YN made her way to her bed, changed into her pajamas, and got under the covers. But she didn’t sleep. How could she, with Harry’s words running through her head? Instead, she spent the night tossing and turning, rolling around in her bed and desperately trying to shake her thoughts free. That night, she was up later than the time the campers wanted to pull an all-nighter.

. . .

Looking back, it would have been smart of YN to cut her conversation with Harry short, go to bed early, and get a good night’s sleep. She would have smiled while thinking back on a conversation about mundane nothingness, snuggled under her warm blanket that she brought from home, and drifted away into an easy dreamland for eight hours. Maybe she would have even dreamed something sweet about Harry, something mixed in with crazy dream logic like maybe he was holding her close and teaching her to fly off a cliff so they could escape the crazy ostriches chasing them through the forest. That would have been nice.

But no, that’s not what YN did. She had a conversation that left her more confused than she started, and she hardly got any sleep. Rolling over every five minutes and never truly able to get comfortable, she struggled all night. Her body would not let her relax. Her feet kept tapping and her mind kept swirling and her leg was really itchy for some reason.

All in all, she probably got four hours of good sleep that night. And normally, she would have been able to make do, maybe take a nap during her hour off, take it easy for the day. But that wasn’t possible as she was woken by excited screaming and pounding on the doors and windows.

Somehow, YN had forgotten that it was Color Wars day. And when the realization hit her, it came with the extra weight of remembering that she was supposed to be a team captain. Blue Team - which it turned out was different from the team her campers would be on because they were assigned separately, which made the morning quite complicated.

The kids were excited, jumping out of bed as they searched through their clothes for something red to wear to represent their team color. They were eagerly chatting and Sarah had to remind them to brush their teeth because they were just so excited.

Meanwhile, YN rolled out of bed slowly, groaning as her aching body moved and her eyes adjusted to the light in the room. Why had she agreed to be a team captain? This day was practically a day off for most of the staff - not having to shepherd the kids from one place to another, most of the responsibility landing on the team captains and the teenagers. And then she remembered that Harry had talked her into it a few weeks ago. The original idea was to be team captains together, but then Mitch thought it would be funnier to make them compete, and now YN was going to spend her entire day opposing Harry instead of lounging around with him.

It didn’t help her mood that the wake-up call of screaming teenagers came 30 minutes earlier than the usual alarm so that the teams could congregate prior to breakfast and start the day with energy. So with less sleep, more on her mind, and no real enthusiasm, YN trudged her way to the amphitheater where she made sure her campers were seated with their team and she took to the stage with the other captains.

Harry was already there, all dressed in red complete with a red cowboy hat and sunglasses. YN smiled to herself, knowing the girls would love being on his team for the day. Next to him stood Niall, YN’s co-captain for Blue Team. Niall was always sweet, and always had so much energy, so he would be a great captain in that respect. But she knew that he would get lost up in the excitement of everything and YN would end up being the one to count the kids and make sure everything actually ran smoothly.

Music was playing loudly in the background (too loudly for so early in the morning, if you asked YN, not that anyone did) and the kids were all dancing in their seats. When it was time for the team captains to introduce themselves, Harry of course went first.

“I’m Harry and I’m your Red Team captain! And Red Team is going to win because we’re on fire!” The girls on the benches screamed after him, giggling to each other about how they would get to spend the whole entire day with him. He had way too much energy for someone who had the same conversation the night before as YN did. It wasn’t fair.

“I’m YN and I’m the Blue Team captain! And Blue Team is going to win because we’re the coolest!” Niall came up after her and sprayed his entire water bottle on the Blue Team campers in the front row.

At breakfast, YN made a beeline for the coffee station. She was going to need more than one cup if she was going to survive this day. The coffee machine was slow, so she stood there for a few minutes surveying the room, eventually making eye contact with Harry. He smiled wide and walked over to join her.

“Y’alright?” he asked, wrapping his arm around her in a short hug.

“Yeah,” she sighed.

“Y’look like sleeping is your next sport.”

“I’d lose at that too,” she told him with a sigh. “Couldn’t sleep last night. Gonna need extra coffee to get through this day.”

“Really? The Color Wars energy doesn’t just... run through your veins and make you go crazy?” he teased.

YN snorted. “Not exactly, Styles, no.”

He dropped it, grabbing a cup to make his own coffee for the morning before changing the conversation.

“Why couldn’t you sleep? We weren’t up all that late.”

She shrugged. “Had a lot on my mind after...” She drifted off, not exactly sure how to finish her sentence. But he nodded anyway, understanding.

“We gotta work on that - make sure you’re sleeping good at night. S’not healthy to not sleep... plus you get so cranky, pain in my ass.”

YN playfully whacked him on his arm.

“I’m just being honest, looking out for ya,” he shrugged.

They sat together for breakfast, ignoring the fact that the teams were supposed to be divided in the dining hall. But no one tried to separate them. They talked as they ate their rubbery pancakes, laughing over old memories and new camper stories.

And then Harry stopped. He looked at her with his head cocked to the side and reached out to her face. With his fingertip, he brushed just under her eye.

YN held her breath.

“Y’got an eyelash,” he said softly, sitting back down but holding the lash on his fingertip for her to see. “Make a wish.”

She closed her eyes, thinking for a moment and then blowing the lash away. When she opened them again, Harry was looking at her with a gentle smile.

The moment was interrupted by Mitch handing them their schedules for the day. They were disappointed to realize the only hour in the day they would have together was capture the flag in the late afternoon - which they would also be required to participate in. That meant YN had to spend the whole day giving off fake energy for a day she didn’t really care about and Harry wouldn’t even be there to cheer her up or keep her going. It also meant more time for memories of the conversation last night to take hold in her mind and no way to clear anything up with him.

She did her best to grit her teeth and make it through. To the best of her ability, she did what she could to ensure that none of the kids knew she was dreading every moment of this day. With a smile on her face at all times, she kept campers of all ages engaged and excited and pretended like someone was actually keeping score of who was winning all the sports and games. (Yes, games. There were complaints last year that sports-only was not inclusive enough so this year they included things like competitive Apples to Apples and water pitcher chugging contests.)

And although YN didn’t exactly have a companion directly by her side all day like usual, she had to admit, being paired up with Niall for the day wasn’t so bad. She was mostly right about him being sweet and kind and full of energy. She was also right about her having to do most of the logistics and responsibility aspect of the job, but she was ok with that. He kept up the energy and she made sure no one got killed and for the most part, things seemed to be going smoothly. Only three kids had been taken to the infirmary and only one of those kids was actually injured in a way that made her nervous, so she considered that a pretty big win.

Lunch wasn’t so bad either. It was a tradition that the campers had to be silent at lunch on Color Wars day, and only the team captains could speak. That meant she couldn’t sit down and have a regular conversation with Harry because everyone could hear everything she was saying, but it meant that she got to call across the giant room to Niall and wave and make jokes about how the Blue Team was going to win. And he wasn’t Harry, but Niall definitely made her laugh quite a bit.

By the afternoon, YN was more exhausted than ever, but her mood was a little better than it had been in the morning. With a handful of fun moments under her belt, and a break from her own cabin of campers, the day hadn’t been a total loss after all. But then she twisted her ankle playing basketball causing her team to lose, and she caught three different sets of campers making out behind a fence, and her grumpiness came right back.

So when it was time for capture the flag against Red Team with Harry, YN was both annoyed in general with her day and relieved to at least get to see him. But they couldn’t even play on the same team since they were opposing team captains, which only made her crankier. Plus, YN had never seen her campers so engaged in an activity as they were when they were listening to Harry describe the strategy for the game. Which totally wasn’t fair because they never listened to her if she tried to give instructions or remind them to shower or quiet down at the end of lunch.

The game started and kids from both teams started running around the field, tagging each other and guarding their flags. Harry was deeply invested in the game, or so it seemed. He stood at the border between the two sides and instructed the campers on who should run where, who should go up against who, and what their best possibility for actually getting the flag might be.

YN, meanwhile, stayed back. She helped to guard Blue Team’s flag, which sat in the middle of a circle of bright orange cones. Her thinking was that most of the campers and staff would get tagged before they even got to her, so she wouldn’t really have to do all that much. She also thought that if she had a frown on her face or her brows were furrowed, no one would really notice because they wouldn’t really be looking at her, but looking past her to the flag itself.

When YN and Harry first made eye contact from across the field, his expression changed from one of determination to one of concern. He cocked his head to the side and mouthed “are you ok?” as best he could, and YN shrugged and nodded. He didn’t seem convinced, but a camper ran up to him to excitedly tell him a new possible strategy, and being the allstar counselor he was, Harry turned his attention to the child.

After that, they caught each other’s gaze a few times from across the field, Harry’s devious smirk growing more pronounced each time. YN couldn’t quite figure out what it meant, so she pushed the thought away and continued in the game. So far, her strategy of staying back and putting in minimal effort was working, and she was rather proud of herself for that. Maybe she could get through this game without too much difficulty, finish off the day strong, put the kids to bed, and spend time in the lounge with Harry comparing their days through laughter.

After the game had been going for nearly 30 minutes, campers were getting tired, and YN was checking her watch, she knew something big had to be coming soon. Harry was smart, and he wasn’t going to keep directing his team to be doing the same thing forever. Plus he noticed that YN wasn’t in the happiest of moods and if history meant anything, he would probably be doing something stupid to try and cheer her up pretty soon.

YN was right, as she saw Harry circle up a group of campers (mostly her cabin, who were essentially attached to him all day). They broke up their huddle and spread out and Harry counted down from three, and that’s when all of them, including Harry, ran towards the Blue Team’s side of the field. Typically he would let a camper here or there catch him and send him back to the other side to give the illusion of success, but not this time.

He swiftly dodged the many small hands reaching for him until he made it to the back side of the field. Standing in front of YN, his stance was crouched down a bit with bent knees and he looked at the game around him. His eyes then reached YN, who took his same stance mockingly.

“Think you can get past me, Styles?”

“Maybe.” His dimples were on full display.

“Can’t get the flag for yourself, gotta let a camper get it. Come on, thought you were better than this.”

Harry shrugged. “Maybe I am.”

He looked around again, and when he saw that several of his team’s campers had made it to the far end of the field with him, he called out to them “NOW!”

One foot in front of the other, he ran directly at YN rather than trying to get around her.

“Harry what are you - HARRY!” she called out as he wrapped his arms around her waist, picked her up, and carried her over his shoulder and away from her guard post, legs kicking out and arms whacking his back.

“Harry put me down!” she called out through a laugh.

“NO! This is for Red Team!”

He carried her as close to the edge of the field as he could before dropping to his knees, placing her on the ground on her back, and pinning her down. He sat on top of her, legs on either side of her hips. Smile on full display, dimples deeper than she had probably ever seen, and eyes bright and mischievous, he held her there giggling at his own strategy.

YN was lost in his eyes at this point, no longer paying almost any attention to the game at hand. Later on, someone could tell her that actually a meteor had struck the middle of the field and everyone had passed out and she probably wouldn’t have noticed. She was too busy gazing up at the best view she had seen in ages - Harry’s excited, devious, cute face.

“Let me go!” she called out, though she didn’t really mean it.

“Never!” he answered.

She started flailing her arms around, pushing on his shoulders in a last-ditch attempt to get him off of her, but he only grabbed her hands in his own and raised them above her head, pinning her down completely. He was bent over at the waist, their faces closer than before. They sat there for a moment then, both of them laughing. YN’s cheeks were starting to hurt from the strain of her own smile.

But then something strange happened. Harry’s face dropped, and he suddenly looked much more serious. His gaze traveled to where their hands clasped together above her head, down to her face, along her torso, eventually making his way back up to her eyes.

“Shit, can’t wait till we’re alone...so much I wanna do to you right now...” he whispered with a deeper inflection to his voice than usual.

YN’s smile fell then too as her gaze traveled along his body, landing at the spot where they were connected but saying nothing.

Harry closed his eyes for a moment before inhaling deeply and looking back at her.

“Y’alright though? Didn’t hit the ground too hard did you?” he changed the subject.

“I’m fine, Harry,” she responded, still smiling.

Harry nodded, looking away from her for a moment to gauge what was happening in the game.

YN took her opportunity then, gathering her strength and rolling them both over in the grass until he was on his back and she was on top. Smiling back on her face, she bit down on her bottom lip as she took control of the situation.

And maybe this wasn’t the smartest move YN could have made. Maybe rolling around in the grass until she was sitting on top of Harry, her center resting over his hips, hands held together next to his head, wasn’t the greatest thing to be doing in the middle of the day around a group of campers. And maybe relaxing her waist and putting more pressure on him when she already knew he was at least a little bit turned on wasn’t the most appropriate thing she could have done to her best friend. But she did it, and the look on his face when he closed his eyes tight and let out a breath was all the reward she needed.

“Fuck, YN,” he groaned out, still quiet enough that no one else could hear but her. “Y’gonna kill me, y’know that?”

She felt him then, solidly beneath her, right where she always secretly wanted him to be, and her eyes went wide at the realization of what she was feeling.

“Shit Harry I - I’m sorry I’ll get up, I’ll -”

“No!” he cut her off. “If you... if you get up now then everyone will see that I’m...”

“Oh... yeah lemme just...” she shifted her weight onto her knees so she was hovering above him then, quickly missing the sensation of him between her thighs but immediately feeling guilt over the thought of her best friend.

“Just... just need a minute,” he told her, eyes squeezed tight.

YN looked up then as she heard screaming from the other end of the field. Harry’s strategy had worked and one of the girls had carried the flag back to Red Team’s side leading to a celebration.

“Think of Niall snoring,” she told him quietly, hoping it would solve his problem before they had to take over responsibilities as captains again. Her suggestion made him laugh.

So, maybe the day hadn’t been a complete waste after all. YN was undoubtedly in a much better mood after their little moment on the field, which was a good thing considering neither blue or red won, but actually it was the green team who was announced as the winner of the day just ahead of dinner time.

YN’s campers spent the evening telling her about their day with Harry. Apparently, he was significantly more fun than they realized, he helped them win lots of games and encouraged them. They were arguing over who got the most high-fives from him and the little one bragged that she even got to give him a hug! He was so muscly but also soft! And his arms were bigger than my face! YN smiled as she heard them recount their stories. Harry was always so good with the kids, knowing when to be kind and gentle, when to give some tough love, and when to make them laugh.

“You’re so lucky you’re dating him, YN,” one of the campers said that night before bed.

“I told you a million times, we’re not dating.”

“Whatever... you spend a lot of time with him and he obviously likes you.”

“And we saw you fighting with him on the field during capture the flag! He was smiling with dimples and everything!” another one called out from her bunk.

“I don’t know what you think you saw,” YN started, “but I’ve told you a million times, we aren’t dating.”

She turned off the lights shortly after that, and luckily the kids were pretty wiped out after the exciting day. It was Sarah’s turn for bedwatch so YN changed into her comfy sweatpants and snuck out the door quietly. Harry hadn’t made a plan with her for that night, but she knew he would be off that night too, and likely in the staff lounge with most of the other counselors.

The stars were bright that night, brighter than usual it seemed. YN almost walked into a tree three separate times on her way down to the staff lounge because she was so distracted by the shapes in the sky. She realized then that they never actually did any stargazing the other night. Maybe she could get Harry to join her in that tonight instead.

She heared the laughter before she even opened the door of the small structure. Inside, something like ten other counselors were sitting in a circle, sharing snacks and laughing about their day. Harry’s face snapped to the door as soon as she opened it, his smile growing big across his face as he scooted over on the old couch to make room for her to sit next to him. YN could feel the tension releasing in her shoulders at the sight of him, realizing that she could have her buddy back and feel a little less alone again.

“YN, just in time!” Adam called to her from across the circle. “We were gonna start playing truth or dare.”

“What are we, 15?” YN teased.

Adam shrugged. “Maybe those teenagers got something right about a fun way to spend the night together.”

Harry draped his arm around the back of the couch then, making space for YN to move in a bit closer to him. His body heat radiated off of him and warmed her on the chilly night. She wanted nothing more than to cuddle into him for real, rest her head on his chest and listen to his heart beat as he spoke soothing words to put her to sleep. Maybe his arm would come down from the couch and wrap around her to keep her securely next to him and he would give a kiss to the top of her head and she closed her eyes.

YN visibly shook her head to get the thoughts to dissipate.

The game started then, going around in a circle. It felt like they were teenagers again - daring each other to kiss and making each other share embarrassing stories or fantasies. Adam apparently had a thing for fucking doggy style and Niall admitted that he had hooked up with two girls in one day one time.

When it was Harry’s turn, he picked truth. Adam started snickering right away.

“I’ve got a good one,” he declared to the group. “Would you ever hook up with YN?”

Her heart dropped. She didn’t want to hear the answer. If the answer was no, she would be at least a little heartbroken to know that she had absolutely no chance, and none of what he had been saying the past few days really held any weight. And it would be so completely embarrassing for that to come out in front of so manypeople, who would no doubt see her face fall a slightly and read into it and maybe realize that she kind of liked him and-

Harry looked down at her with a soft smile before looking back at Adam across the room. He shrugged a bit, dropping his arm from the back of the couch down to rest around her shoulder.

“Sure, why wouldn’t I?” He admitted.

YN was a bit in shock, but she tried her best not to show it. She felt every muscle in her body tense up and her brain was on fire.

The group around them started chatting and joking about the answer, and Harry leaned down to whisper into YN’s ear.

“Are y’alright? That wasn’t too..?”

“No... yeah... I’m...I’m good,” she told him with a forced smile.

Harry dropped his brows. “Y’cold?” he asked, seemingly looking for an answer to why she seemed so uncomfortable.

“No, I’m fine H.”

“YN, it’s your turn!” someone called out, bringing her attention back to the group.

“Um... truth I guess?” In all honesty, YN was a bit afraid after that last question that if she had chosen dare they would dare them to kiss and although she had imagined that moment a million times, she didn’t want it to happen like this. If it was going to happen, she wanted it to happen for real.

“And you have to ask her a different question!” someone clarified.

The group seemed to be thinking to themselves for a moment, trying to come up with a good question before Niall spoke up.

“I got one - YN, tell us about the first time a guy made you cum?”

She immediately felt the blood rushing to her cheeks as she looked down at her lap. Of course, she didn’t want to answer the question, but she didn’t want to cause a scene either. Maybe she could lie. Make up some guy from college who theoretically rocked her world and call it a day. But the point of the game was to tell the truth and she was shit at lying and a stickler for following the rules. The whole room was staring at her, the pressure intensifying with every second. She squeezed her toes, desperately wishing at that moment she could simply disappear and none of this would matter anymore.

Harry’s arm flexed and held her tighter against him as he spoke up.

“She’s not gonna answer that one, ask something else,” he said.

“That’s not fair, it’s the point of the game. Come on, we all shared,” Adam insisted.

YN looked up at Harry, silently begging him to do something. And it was like he could read her mind.

“I said she’s not answering. Either ask another one or we’re leaving.” His voice was deeper and stronger than usual, and all signs of his typical smile vanished completely from his face.

“What, you’re not a virgin are you?”

“No! I’m not it-it’s just...” she couldn’t find the strength to say anything. Luckily, Harry came to her defense again.

He stood up suddenly, grabbing her hand in his and standing up suddenly.

“C’mon, we’re leaving. You don’t have to answer that,” he told her. “She’s not answering it,” he repeated again to the room as he started walking them towards the door.

She did her best to look apologetic to the rest of the group, but when they reached the night air outside and the door closed behind them she let out a sigh of relief. They walked down the hill a little way before Harry stopped, wrapping his arms around her neck and pulling her in close. He always knew exactly what she needed.

“Thank you, H,” she whispered into his chest, arms secured around his lower back. He was wearing an old cozy sweatshirt and she wanted to crawl up inside of it.

His hand started to rub up and down her back. “Of course. Stays between us, right?” He reminded her of his promise the other day. “Still gonna make sure that happens for you this summer though.”

YN knew exactly what he was suggesting, and she felt herself blushing again as she considered Harry somehow fulfilling his promise to give her a partner-induced orgasm before the end of the summer. After everything he had said to her recently, she started to wonder what his plan was. She was grateful that her face was still hidden in their hug.

“Now,” he started softly. “What are we going to do with the rest of our night? Hm?”

YN released her arms from around his back, and Harry followed suit.

“Well I realized we never actually did any stargazing the other night, and it’s so bright tonight I thought maybe we could -”

“Yes!” Harry cut her off. “That sounds perfect. Don’t wanna walk all the way out to our spot though, mind if we go somewhere else?”

YN agreed, and Harry took her hand to lead her to wherever it was that he had in mind. She expected him to let go after a few steps, but he didn’t. Instead, their hands dropped between them and he held onto her tight. His hand was large and warm around hers. Occasionally his thumb would rub up and down the back of her hand.

The walk was nice, and peaceful. She always loved walking through camp at night but it was ten times better with Harry. In the quiet between them, she let her mind wander to happy memories of summers past. The time she watched Harry win a hotdog eating competition in the dining hall. The time she almost fell on her roller skates but Harry reached her right in time so he fell on his ass but she fell only on him. The time YN attempted to play frisbee with him on the field, but accidentally threw the disk into the forest and it took Harry 15 minutes to find it and come back. The time they discovered mint growing down by the creek and picked some to put in their water bottles. The time when they were kids and YN tried so hard to teach Harry to properly dive, but he was a terrible pupil and ended up smacking his face on the water every time.

She had memories with other friends too, sure. But it was those moments with Harry - some special and some rather mundane - that stuck out to her the most. It was him she thought of when they passed each of those locations in the still night, bright stars overhead, and hands clasped together.

“Can practically hear you thinking,” he broke the silence.

She looked up at him with a soft smile. “Yeah, but good things though. I promise.”

Harry hummed in response as they turned the corner and reached the field. “Thought we could hike up to the cliff, stargaze from there. Know it’s dark but it’s not far and I’ve got a flashlight,” he suggested.

She realized then that he must’ve been somehow planning this because he never carried anything with him that he didn’t absolutely need. YN agreed and followed him to the small trailhead at the corner of the field. They started hiking up the narrow path, hands never releasing from one another.

They had hiked this trail dozens of times - a signature hike that was practically a requirement for any camper. But neither of them had ever done it at night. Harry led the way, scanning the trail with his flashlight and warning YN of rocks on the path or roots sticking up. He pushed low branches out of their way and tested the bigger rocks for stability, only allowing her to cross over them when he was convinced she would be safe.

Eventually, the trees parted way and opened up to a small clearing at the top of the cliff. From the edge, they could see the entire camp by the light of the moon. Harry stood behind her, holding her close with his arms around her middle, and she relaxed back into him. Her head rested on his chest and she let out a deep breath.

“Don’t think I’ve ever been up here at night,” he whispered to her like it was a secret, even though they were alone.

“Me neither.”

YN was meant to be looking up at the stars, but she was so at peace in that moment she let her eyelids drop and soaked up the moment with Harry instead. He had said he liked holding her close, but she never truly appreciated how good it felt until this moment. If she could freeze time and live in one moment forever, she’s pretty sure she would choose this one.

They were silent for a while, appreciating the moment together. Harry’s thumb stroked up and down her tummy a bit, and YN moved her hands to hold Harry’s arms. He was soft, and warm, and strong, and safe. The entire universe could melt away leaving just the two of them, and YN would still be happy to be standing there together.

After a few minutes of quiet, she opened her eyes. Adjusting to the moonlight, she blinked a few times, letting out a contented sigh.

“Harry?”

“Yeah?”

“I like when you hold me close too,” she admitted.

“Good,” he answered. “Because I think I want to start doing it a lot more often.”

YN turned around to face him without removing leaving his grasp. He had a pout, clearly disappointed that she was no longer resting up against him.

She leaned her head back and looked up at him to ask, “What do you mean when you say those things, H? Like when you said you wanted to be everything for me, or you were selfish and I’m yours. Or on the field, you said you wanted to do things alone?”

Harry sighed, a smile on his face as he shook his head at her. “You ask all these questions, YN. Thought I was making it pretty obvious.”

“Making what obvious?”

“That... that I want you.”

They were whispering, even though no one was within earshot. Harry used one hand on her lower back to press her closer to him, and lifted the other to rest his palm on the side of her face, his thumb rubbing softly at the apple of her cheek.

“Want me how?” she asked, breathless.

“Want you like this.”

He looked down to her lips, then back up at her eyes. Closing the distance between them, his soft lips touched hers. The gesture was gentle, careful, both of them holding their breaths. She melted into his touch and reached out for his body bringing one hand to his hip and the other to his chest. When his lips began to move, her hand grabbed at the top of his shirt, bringing him in even closer.

Harry took the lead in parting slightly, their lips still brushing as he spoke.

“You’ve no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that.”

“Really? I... I never thought that you would want this... with me.”

He looked at her quizzically, head cocked to the side. “Why not?”

“Well... because you’re you, and I’m me,” she explained like it was obvious.

“What does that mean?”

“It means... Harry, you’re cute, and you’re sweet, and you have that accent, and you could get anyone you want. You kissed all my friends and never made a move on me so I just figured....”

“YN,” Harry started, shaking his head. “That is so... stupid. I never did that with you because... you were always worth too much to me. Those girls... I kissed them once and then never talked to them again. Or we hooked up a few times and then things got weird. I didn’t... even back then I knew you were more important than that, I didn’t want to lose you. Been thinking about this for years but you... you always turned me down.”

“Turned you down?” she asked, confused now. “You never even...”

“Babe, all those nights we went stargazing? You wouldn’t even touch my hand or give me a hug! I tried so many times but eventually, I just gave up and... I figured I’d rather have you as my friend than not have you at all. Or even the other night, outside your cabin. I told you I wanted to be everything for you, and you just hugged me and said I was a good friend. I’ve always been here. I’ve been right here waiting for you.”

YN was shocked at the revelation but did her best to hide it.

“You are... everything to me. Really.”

“For so long I thought you would never see me as anything else,” he admitted to her. “But now that I know that you... I’m never going to let you feel alone, ever again. I promise.”

“Well... let’s make up for lost time then.”

He didn’t answer, only leaned back in and started kissing her again, this time with a little more force. His right hand supported her jaw while his left traveled down to her hips where he used his leverage to pull her in tighter against him. YN let out a little gasp when she felt her core right up against him, and he used the opportunity to slip his tongue between her lips. YN took to it naturally, her heart fluttering as he squeezed at her hip and let his other hand move back into her hair.

“Harry,” she breathed out as he took a moment to catch his own breath.

“I know,” he responded before diving back in.

They continued like that for a while, hands wandering, lips and tongues working together. She could’ve sworn she heard him let out a few little sounds, but it might have been a trick of her brain when some birds called out overhead. His body was warm, and cozy, and safe. And he was really good at what he was doing.

A gust of wind passed over them, causing YN to shiver a bit. Harry stopped then, a look of concern on his face.

“Y’cold? Can have my jacket if you want,” he offered.

“No, I’d rather just... just keep holding me.”

So he did. They stood there together, at the top of the cliff overlooking the whole camp, and held each other close - YN’s back leaning against Harry’s front and her head resting on his shoulder. Their breaths synced up and YN turned her attention to the sky, where it was meant to be all along. And they stayed like that, close and warm and content until YN looked down at her watch and noticed it was almost staff curfew.

“Should probably head down now,” she said.

“Yeah...” he agreed but didn’t move. “Just... lemme stay like this for a couple more minutes.”

. . .

YN couldn’t stop smiling. It was plastered across her face all day, and only got wider when she saw Harry or remembered last night. She was in a great mood in the morning, a time that she was usually a little bit grouchy. And had almost too much enthusiasm when her campers won a basketball game. At pool time, she actually changed into her bathing suit and played with the kids, jumping and diving in and taking silly pictures.

Harry was being sweet on her all day too. At breakfast, he made her coffee and let her eat off of his plate. He disciplined a camper so she didn’t have to when they were refusing to clear off their lunch plate. And he sat next to her during every program and activity - which wasn’t different from normal, but given what had just happened, it felt different to YN. Some little empty spot inside of her heart that had been there for as long as she could remember felt like it had been filled with a magic, sparkling warmth that only Harry could give her. She remembered how Harry had told her that night behind the cabin that he knew she was lonely, and YN knew in that moment that she was never going to feel lonely again. Not as long as Harry was around.

Like every day, the campers pestered her about Harry, but she indulged them a smidge more. When they giggled over how cute he was she casually agreed, and when they asked what his hugs were like she described them as solid and warm and safe. When they asked if they were dating, she still said no but she said it with a bit more of a smile than usual.

In the early afternoon during art time, the girls were working on ceramics and the boys were having a turn at tie-dye. YN doesn’t always participate in these activities with the campers, often taking the time where they are being supervised by additional staff to take a step back and relax or gossip with Harry. But he was heavily engaged in helping his kids with their tie dye (mostly making sure they didn’t squirt dye at each other) so YN decided it was as good a time as ever to try her hand at making a pot. There was definitely some trial and error involved, and when Harry walked over to check on her “need some water or anything?” she couldn’t stop herself from dabbing a spot of wet clay onto his nose, both of them giggling.

They sat together during the daily staff meeting, Harry’s arm securely around YN’s shoulder as Mitch droned on with information that they were meant to be listening to. She had to resist the urge to melt into his side the same way she melted into him while held her on the cliff the night before. In all honesty, she hardly paid any attention to the meeting. Her mind was too busy replaying visions of her and Harry hiking, looking at the stars, kissing...

Harry stood up, shaking YN out of her thoughts as the meeting ended. He turned around to look at her with a soft smile.

“So, steal some snacks? Watch TV in the lounge?” he suggested.

“No, let’s... let’s hang out in my cabin.”

Harry’s smile grew wider as he knew exactly what she was thinking. They walked up the hill hand in hand, giggling as they fell through the doorway of the cabin, trekking over the messes left by campers after weeks of not cleaning. They made it to the front of the cabin and stood in front of her bed.

Hooking his fingers into her belt loops, he pulled her in closer to him so their centers matched. Her breath was heavy as she looked into his eyes and started giggling softly, one hand on his bicep and the other resting over his heart. Matching her energy, Harry placed a few pecks on her lips before leaving short kisses on the tip of her nose, her cheek, her forehead. Her laughter grew with his every touch and she felt the butterflies in her tummy dancing like fireworks.

Stopping for a moment, Harry backed up and tilted his head, hearts in his eyes as he admired YN who started blushing uncontrollably.

“Y’so.... fuckin’ beautiful, shit,” he murmured under his breath. Her blush grew even deeper.

“Shut up and kiss me,” she responded, moving her hand from his arm to bury her fingers in the hair at the back of his head.

“Alright.” With a smile, he dove back in, kissing her deeply.

The night before on the cliff was gentle, timid, unsure, and soft. But this time was eager and hungry. One of his hands stroked up her side, thumb gently passing over the side of her breast and then snaking around to her upper back, where he used his new leverage to push her even closer to him. His other hand remained on her hip, squeezing tightly, and she hoped there might be faint bruises left over.

As they stood there together, making out in an empty cabin in the middle of the day, YN was the happiest she could ever remember being. Historically, she had not always loved making out compared to other acts she could be doing instead, but with Harry, she would take whatever he would give her. His lips were soft and plush, his body was warm, and she never felt more wanted than in that moment with him.

He let his hand wander from her hip around her back to appreciate her ass. Squeezing one cheek lightly, the tips of his fingers reached below the frayed hemline of the shorts and came in contact with her soft skin.

“Fuck, babe. Driving me crazy running ‘round in these things,” he groaned against her lips.

She giggled in response, becoming pliant as he turned their bodies similarly to how they navigated the platform on the ropes course, and the back of her knees hit the edge of her bed. Their lips broke for a moment as she rearranged herself to be lying down on the twin-sized mattress. Harry followed her, his left arm supporting his body on the bed next to her shoulder and his right hand finding its place on her jaw. He hovered above her, tilting her chin up to meet his as he reconnected their lips.

That’s when she felt his hips drop down to meet hers. She let out a small gasp into the kiss as she felt the extent of his excitement, and he chuckled under his breath in response. They tried not to break their lips apart, but when he rolled his hips into hers, she couldn’t help but let out a shallow breath, mouth open wide.

“Fuck...so much I wanna do... don’t know where t’start,” Harry admitted, lips brushing up against YN’s.

“Harry, I’m gonna be honest, I’m so fucking wet right now I don’t even care what you do but if you don’t do something right now I’m going to literally die,” she begged.

He laughed a bit at that, shifting his body enough to leave a soft kiss on her forehead.

“Want me to take care of you?” he asked.

“Please.”

“How much time do we have left?”

YN looked at her watch. “A little over 40 minutes.”

“Ok,” he nodded, gears clearly spinning as he thought through his plan. “I can work with that. But next time,” he raised a brow, making sure she was looking at him before repeating himself. “I can make that work, but next time we’re gonna go slow, alright?”

She nodded her head eagerly, still desperate for him to do something, anything. To touch her or kiss her or something.

“Eager today, hm?”

“Harry, I’ve been waiting for this for so long, please just touch me.”

He laughed again, leaning down to kiss at her jaw, behind her ear, and down her neck. Desperately, he wanted to leave a mark on her pulse point but he knew better than that given the circumstances. Still, he took his time, appreciating every bit of her body that he had access to. Her shoulder, her collar bones, the top of her chest.

Finally, his hands found their way under the hem of her shirt and started to lift slowly. His touch on her skin felt like fire in the best possible way.

“Can I?” he asked. Again, she nodded her head.

She sat up a bit to help him lift her shirt up over her head, which he threw to the ground to join the rest of the mess in the cabin. Before YN could lay back down completely his hand twisted around to her back, resting flat over the clasp of her bra.

“And...?”

“Yes,” she breathed out desperately.

With a quick twist, he released the clasp and she wiggled her shoulders to help the old, unexciting bra fall down. He took it the rest of the way off of her, throwing it on the floor as well. Then he sat back for a moment, eyes glued to her body, admiring her wordlessly. YN started to squirm under his harsh gaze, tempted to cover herself with her arm.

She started to move to block his view, but he caught her hand just in time and placed it back beside her.

“No just... so pretty I jus’ wanna...” his voice drifted off and his gaze turned softer as he leaned down and started leaving kisses on the tops of her breasts.

YN closed her eyes, appreciating the feeling of his mouth on her body, finally. While his mouth focused on one side, his hand kneaded at the other until they switched. He sucked and pinched at her nipples until they were standing up proud for him to lick at. But he was moving slowly, too slowly, and they only had limited time before they had to pick up their campers from electives.

“Harry, this is great but I need you to-”

“I know,” he cut her off.

Harry left one last kiss on each breast before trailing his mouth down her stomach until he reached the top of her denim shorts. He hooked a finger beneath the waistband and looked up at her, waiting for her nod before he continued to pull down her shorts and panties in one pull. She lifted her hips to help him and he threw them onto the floor with the rest of her clothes.

“Take off your shirt,” she demanded.

He smiled, pulling his shirt from the back of his neck and tossing it aside.

“Like what you see?” he teased.

With a straight face, she responded “Yes, now please.”

Harry giggled a bit, sitting back on his knees at the end of the bed. He placed his hands on her thighs and looked up at her with a soft gaze as he left a gentle squeeze.

“Now this,” he said, dimple popping on one side, “is where I keep that promise from the other night.”

It took YN a moment to break through the fog in her brain and remember what he was talking about - a partner-induced orgasm.

“Bold of you to assume you can do it.”

“Is that a challenge? I take this very seriously,” he replied, smile still plastered across his face.

She nodded.

“Alrigh’ then, spread your legs for me darlin’,” he told her softly, dragging his hands down her thighs and helping to spread her open.

He took his place in between her legs, and exactly as he had with her chest he took a moment to admire her body in front of him.

“Can’t believe y’hid this pussy from me for so long,” he said mostly to himself, shaking his head.

YN felt the cold air meet her center and shivered.

“Won’t be cold for long, I promise.”

With that, Harry dove down and got to work. He started by licking her core up and down, appreciating it and getting a feel for her body. When he sucked lightly on her clit she felt her body jolt, completely out of her own control. And when his tongue entered her, she threw her head back on the pillow.

But the killer was when he sat up a bit to take a breath and used his hands to spread her lips apart, keeping direct eye contact with her as he let a trail of spit land right on her most sensitive spot.

“Harry,” YN said breathlessly. “It’s... it’s a lot but it’s so... fuck H... you’re doing so good you...” She could barely get a sentence out but tried her best knowing that he liked the praise.

“Y’like that? Good... you’re doing so good for me, baby.” Her body shuddered again, but this time it wasn’t from the temperature in the room. Maybe she liked the praise a little bit too.

“Harry...”

“I know baby, I know,” he whispered against her skin, not stopping his movements.

He looked right up at her then, making eye contact as he put on a show of licking at her little button. It didn’t last for long though, since she closed her eyes to cope with the pleasure she was feeling. By this point, she was squirming and wiggling beyond her control, and Harry had to place his arm over her lower tummy to help keep her still for him.

They were in a rush timing-wise, but based on Harry’s movements she would have thought they had all the time in the world. He used his tongue in long, languid strokes, his fingers assisting with her clit while he tasted her. Rubbing in slow circles, his movements somehow matched the low groans he was letting out at her taste.

“Best thing I’ve ever tasted,” he murmured under his breath before looking up at YN’s face. “Could stay down here all day, y’know that?”

“Harry, please. We don’t have much time.”

She was right, his slow movements were eating away at their deadline and if he wanted to get her to the finish line he was going to have to start working for it. He looked at the time on her bedside clock, eyes going wide as he saw that they only had 20 minutes left.

“Want you to relax for me, can you do that?” he asked her. “Only gonna work if you relax and let me work, ok?”

“I’ll try.”

“Good girl.”

She keened at the phrase, and blood would have rushed to her cheeks if it wasn’t already rushing down to her throbbing clit. A bit embarrassed, YN was relieved that Harry didn’t say anything about her reaction, but secretly hoped he noticed enough that he would at least say it again.

As he refocused again, he brought his mouth to her clit and filled her with his fingers. She hadn’t had anyone inside of her for a long time, so even though his fingers were smaller than her vibrator, the sensation took a moment to get used to. But he hardly gave her any time at all, thrusting his fingers in and out of her at a ruthless pace. Meanwhile, his lips encased her enlarged clit, sucking hard in pulses and using his tongue to circle around the area. It was a lot, and it was so good.

“Harry... I... fuck... you’re so... Harry...”

He hummed without lifting his mouth from its spot and the vibrations went straight to her core. She could feel her stomach starting to tighten up, her toes starting to curl, the muscles in her legs starting to tense. With one hand she grabbed at the sheet, the other buried deep in his hair and starting to pull. She wanted to tell him he was doing a good job, wanted to tell him she was going to cum soon, wanted to tell him ‘thank you for trying so hard’, wanted to appease the praise kink she knew he had. But in that moment her brain was relegated to a pile of mush and if she tried to say any words she was confident they would come out like gibberish.

So instead she opened her mouth, allowing her vocal cords to wake up and add some music to the heavy breathing and panting she had been doing up until that point. Her small moans did the talking for her, letting him know she was close and starting to lose control.

The octave of her sounds went up suddenly when he twisted his fingers, rubbing them against the top of her walls and finding that elusive spot that no other man had managed (or even tried) to find. Her hips started bucking towards him on their own accord, and that’s how she knew he was really going to keep his promise.

“Harry... I... Harry,” was all she could get out of her mouth prior to the flood of pleasure ripped through her body. It was completely different than the orgasms she had caused by herself. Maybe her vibrator could be a bit stronger than his fingers, but with Harry never stopping his motions, she felt grateful and happy in a way that the small robot could never make her feel. Her eyes squeezed tightly closed, head leaning all the way back to reveal her elongated neck, and she tugged even harder at Harry’s hair (which only made him moan again, increasing the sensations she was experiencing in that moment).

YN wasn’t even aware of the noises she was making or how loud she was being, even though she probably should have tried to keep quiet as the old buildings were definitely not soundproof to any extent. But in that moment none of it mattered. The only thing that mattered was Harry and the way he was making her feel.

He continued rubbing and thrusting and sucking and licking until she couldn’t take any more, whimpering as she used her grasp in his hair to push him away. She was panting, eyes still closed as she attempted to catch her breath.

Opening her eyes just in time, YN saw Harry bring his fingers up to his mouth, sucking them clean followed by wiping his shiny face on the back of her discarded shirt. He crawled up the bed to lie down next to her, and she knew she had a stupid smile on her face but she didn’t even care.

“Told you I’d make it happen for you this summer. Dream team, right?”

She giggled at that.

Looking at her watch, she realized they only had 10 minutes left until they had to be down the hill with their campers, which meant they only had 5 minutes until they had to throw their clothes back on and leave the cabin.

“Is five minutes enough for me to... for you... your turn?” she settled on, unsure of how to ask what she was suggesting.

Harry let out a short breath. “Shit, YN. After watching you do that I think I could cum in about 30 seconds. I mean. Fuck.”

YN giggled as she reached down to his tummy, spreading her fingers out to feel his soft skin and muscles before drifting lower to the top of his shorts.

“Gonna let me help, then?” she asked softly.

He nodded in response as YN hooked her fingers in his waistband and pulled his pants down. When his length sprang up and nearly hit his stomach, she had to pause. YN wanted so badly to admire his cock, to appreciate his body the way he had done for her, or maybe even more so. But they didn’t have time. She could swear it was both longer and thicker than what he had described while they were drinking a few days ago, but she could easily be remembering wrong. Regardless, it had no business being as pretty as it was. Solid, a thick vein running up the side, his head sensitive and nearly purple as he started to leak.

But right as she was about to reach for it and get to work, Harry stopped her. He grabbed her hand, bringing it up to his lips where he kissed each of her knuckles.

“Wait, no babe,” he told her. “We don’t have time and I want... I want things to always be good with us, yeah? I made you feel good, and next time it can be my turn, ok?”

With a few minutes left over, the two of them opted to stay where they were in her bed, YN resting her head on Harry’s chest and their arms wrapped around each other. This was the type of holding close she had been secretly hoping he was talking about up on the ropes course. She heard his heartbeat eventually start to slow down, and his breathing stretched out. If they had more time, they definitely would have both fallen asleep like that.

But they didn’t. With five minutes left until electives ended, at the time they should have been walking out of the door, YN and Harry groaned in a very unsexy way as they pulled themselves out of the bed. Harry threw his clothes back on quickly, but YN had to dig through her shelf to find a new shirt and make sure to hide the dirty one at the bottom of her laundry bag.

After changing, YN turned around to see Harry looking at her with a smile.

“What?”

��Nothing just...” he placed a short kiss on her lips. “Alright, now we can go.”

It was like that for a few days, then, spending that quality alone time together in her cabin during hours off. On nights off they had to get more creative with their locations - the storage room on the field, behind the infirmary, in the oversized bathroom, on a platform hidden behind some trees that no one ever used. It was risky, sure. But it was exciting, and fun, and new. YN didn’t really care where they were or what they were doing as long as they were doing it together.

Harry was so good with his words, too. So many years of practice made him great at getting her worked up just by what he said to her and how he said it. Sometimes he would whisper something naughty in her ear during the staff meeting when they were surrounded by their peers. But mostly he spoke to her in that perfect way while he was knuckles deep inside of her, or his head was buried between her legs, or his dick was inside of her mouth and his hand was on the back of her head.

They always felt like they had limited time. Even on nights off, there was a curfew and the ever-present risk of getting caught. They were hardly the first couple to hook up at camp but still, no one wanted to get caught in the act. So with the risk and time limits hanging over their heads, they never felt safe enough to really go for it, to fully give themselves to one another in the way they really wanted to.

YN didn’t mind though. Ever since that night on the cliff, she craved Harry’s lips on hers. It was like a drug. She started getting distracted while he was talking to her because instead of staring into his bright eyes, she was gazing longingly at his plush lips. On more than one occasion she caught herself right in time before leaning in to kiss him in front of campers. When they finally got to be alone, the first thing she would always do is attach herself to him by the lips and swear she would never let go.

They weren’t always being naughty while they were alone though. Oftentimes they were doing the same thing they had always been doing, just with some extra affection. They still snuck into the kitchen to steal snacks but hid in an empty room so they could give each other kisses between bites. She told him about her day with her head on his lap as he played with her hair. And she scratched his back lightly while he was face down on her bed complaining about a camper. Sometimes they held hands and walked through the forest at night, reminiscing over old memories. And a lot of the time they held each other close, cuddling warm and cozy without saying a word.

One night they decided to hike to the hidden campsite that was never used anymore and do some more stargazing together. They sat down on a big rock and Harry wrapped his arm around YN to hold her close and keep her warm. Like they always had, they would point out shapes in the stars to each other, discussing the universe or whatever else was on their minds. But what was on their mind tended to be them together, and in between, they couldn’t keep from kissing each other. YN even caught Harry looking at her when she was trying to point out a puppy she had found in the stars.

“H, you’re not looking,” she chastised him softly.

“I’m looking right where I wanna be, babe.” He left a kiss on her cheek before finally turning to see where she was pointing to.

And when it was quiet, they would talk about the future. They discussed their career paths, and how YN always wanted a little home with a picket fence and a dog. And Harry told her about the garden he always dreamed of when he was little. She told him about the cities in America she was considering when it was time to leave camp and start a year-round job, and Harry desperately tried to convince her that London was better.

“But it’s so foggy and gray, Harry,” she had complained.

Harry shrugged. “Sure it’ll brighten up if you’re there. You’ll see. I’m taking you in September, and don’t even try to stop me.”

And she didn’t. She loved the idea of getting to visit London with Harry, finally seeing the places he had been telling her about for years. But mostly she wanted to see him in his other comfort zone - camp was definitely a home to him but his real home, she was sure, would bring out something else in him that she might not have been able to see yet. And she always wanted to see more of him.

One day they decided to do things a bit backward. Instead of sneaking out at night, they each slipped out of their cabins early in the morning, before the sun was up. YN was giggling to herself when she found Harry at the trailhead for the cliff in the corner of the field. They were each still in their pajamas, wrapped up in sweatshirts and bracing the chilly morning air. They made it up the hill in time to watch the sunrise over the camp together. The wind was sharper up there, so YN brought herself close to Harry, hugging him tightly and tucking her head under his chin. He held her close, rubbing up and down her back to help keep her warm as they looked out at the pinks and oranges in the sky together before quickly hurrying back down and into their cabins before anyone could realize they were missing.

YN was notoriously not a morning person, but it was impossible to say no to Harry if he suggested something so special. To make it up to her, he had her coffee and breakfast waiting for her in the cafeteria that morning.

Even in her sleepy state, Harry was able to make her laugh at breakfast that morning. They always laughed together, but in the recent days since they kissed they had been laughing even more. It was a big lift, considering Harry had been making her laugh for years. But for some reason, every word that came out of his mouth seemed funny, and she couldn’t keep herself from giggling. She was just as bad as some of her campers, except they would run away as the giggles broke out. With nowhere to run, YN was relegated to childish laughter right in front of Harry. But he never seemed to mind. She could swear it made him smile deeper.

Harry took that laughter to heart, apparently. Because after his little move at capture the flag worked on her, he was desperate to catch YN like that again. He practically chased her around the pool until the lifeguard actually blew a whistle at them. She slowed down to a walk, but not for long as he rushed up beside her, grabbed her by the waist, and jumped into the deep end with her screaming. They came up for air laughing and gasping for breath. YN tried to shove him a bit, but Harry just swam away, daring her to catch him.

And YN didn’t hold back anymore, either. Not that she really was before. But when he walked into dinner wearing a yellow shirt that showed off his honey skin tone and gray shorts that were a bit shorter than his regular tan line, she couldn’t control herself.

“You look hot,” she told him after looking around to make sure no one was in earshot.

He shrugged. “I was out in the sun all day. Here I got you that salad dressing you like,” he said, passing a plate over to her.

Harry had always taken care of her, asking if she needed water, reminding her to grab a jacket. He redoubled his efforts in that area. Refilling her water for her when the line at the fountain was long, reminding her to actually eat her meals when she got distracted by a needy camper, even bringing an extra one of his sweatshirts one evening because he knew that no matter how much he reminded her, she would always forget how chilly it gets once the sun goes down. The effort was big enough that YN noticed, like really noticed. And for the first time, she realized that he had been doing some of these things all along. And maybe if she wasn’t so dense she would have noticed that he didn’t just treat her so well because they were best friends, but because he cared so deeply for her that he couldn’t help it.

YN did nice things for Harry as well. In addition to the onslaught of hugs he was receiving, she gifted him the clay pot she had made in art a few days prior. She painted it rainbow, and when she gave it to him she promised that on their next day off they would buy potting soil and a nice plant to grow in it. She snuck some of his dirty clothes into her bag when it was girls’ laundry day and he was running out of clean socks. Over the years she had made Harry countless friendship bracelets, but it was always because he asked her. Now she was making him one of the biggest she’d ever made and wouldn’t even let him pick the colors because the colors are based on my impression of your aura. You can’t give me any hints.

The campers definitely noticed that something had changed between them as well, but for once, YN didn’t really mind their badgering. She started answering their questions a little bit more coyly. Instead of saying no when they asked if she was dating Harry, she would respond “well, what did I say last time? Do you think anything is different than the last hundred times you asked?” They were so intrigued by him, begging and begging for him to come by their cabin in the evening again, that YN finally relented and invited him to bring his guitar to sing lullabies.

That night was a good deal for YN anyway. She got to spend more time with Harry, listen to his beautiful singing voice, and even put her campers to bed earlier than usual. His voice was nothing short of angelic to her ears, and apparently, the kids agreed. Most of them drifted off within fifteen minutes of his arrival. And although he was technically supposed to be singing to the campers, he spent most of the time looking directly into YN’s eyes. After most of the campers had drifted off, he played both Landslide and The Chain by Fleetwood Mac, which YN knew were two of his all-time favorite songs. His voice was soft and calming as YN eventually tucked herself into bed.

Before he left, Harry gave YN a kiss on the top of her head.

“Sleep well, baby,” he whispered to her, careful not to let any lingering ears hear the pet name.

Already under the blankets and cozy, YN decided it was probably best to call it an early night. Not long ago she had been kept up late because she was thinking of Harry - but this night, she felt comforted and safe even just by the memory of him being there. She imagined he was in the bed with her, innocently cuddling up close to each other. That night she dreamt of his voice singing only to her while she rested her head on his chest, his arms embracing her, warm under the blanket in a room by themselves.

It might have been fun and games for the campers, but trouble came in the form of other staff noticing that things were changing. No one could really point to anything in particular because if they said it out loud, it sounded like the kind of stuff they always did - sitting together at meals, gossiping during programs, spending nights off together. What had changed was in the unspoken moments - the way they looked into each other’s eyes, the vibe let off while they were together.

It had gotten to a point where Mitch had actually reprimanded the two of them for spending too much time together and not enough time with their campers. They tried to argue that they were often together because they were with their campers, but it was to no avail. The ultimatum was that if they weren’t sitting with their campers at the next meal time, they wouldn’t be allowed in the same age group next session. And that was a risk neither of them were willing to take, especially not now.

So they sat at the table eating their soggy tacos for lunch surrounded by 11 and 12-year-olds and pretending like everything was exactly the same. YN tried desperately to follow the stories the kids would tell, to understand the gossip they were spinning, but she always lost her way. Harry, on the other hand, was right there with them. He really shined while he was doing his job. He listened, he made them laugh, and he gave great advice. The girls were still coming up to him with random questions after his promise to always be honest with them after that first night in the cabin.

And honestly, even while YN was surrounded by kids, she had a pretty narrow vision of Harry. She was practically blinded by the light he was letting off. Multiple times the kids had to reach around her to pass the sauce because she wasn’t paying enough attention. And normally she would have felt guilty - she really prided herself on her job as a counselor. But at this point, she didn’t really care as much as she cared about listening to whatever words came slowly dripping out of Harry’s mouth.

So they met the ultimatum, but only barely.

At dinner, Mitch instructed them to sit completely separately from each other. They needed to show the campers that you should be friends with everyone! And as hard as it was, both of them knew they had to do it. A little time apart would be ok. And they weren’t truly apart anyway, they were only sitting at different tables for one hour for dinner. How bad could it be?

YN honestly thought it wasn’t too bad at all. At first, she was frustrated because after spending days completely absorbed in Harry, the thought of losing one of their favorite moments of the day together was going to be difficult. But she ended up sitting with a group of campers and Niall, and she already knew he could be fun after they were color wars captains together. He was funny and made her laugh with his dramatic stories and big gestures. The kids ate up every word that came out of his mouth (including when he told them to eat their vegetables).

“Y’know,” he turned to her when the kids were mostly distracted. “On color wars day, when we went back to the cabin after lunch, he was all mopy and grumpy,” Niall told her.

“Really?”

“Oh yeah. But he always gets like that when you’re not around.”

This was news to YN, but she couldn’t say she was surprised. She often felt out of sorts when they were separated too, and after the way he had been treating her so sweetly recently...

“He was so cranky I had to mess with him so of course I put a peeled banana in his pillowcase that night. Didn’t laugh as much as I had hoped but, it helped.”

YN laughed at the story, and she kept laughing as Niall told her about more pranks and jokes he had pulled on Harry and others. And because she couldn’t see the look in Harry’s eyes from across the room as he watched her laughing at Niall’s jokes, she thought everything was fine and dandy. She happened to be standing next to Niall during closing circle that evening, and while the arm around her waist wasn’t Harry’s, it was nice being supported by someone over the age of 12. When the song ended, the kids all started to hug each other goodnight, so naturally, YN gave Niall a quick hug and then sought out Harry who was on the other side of the room.

YN was excited to get a moment to talk with Harry after being separated from him for most of the day, but as she approached him she saw a deep furrow in his brow. Her smile dropped quickly as she cocked her head to the side, questioning him.

“Why’re you so grumpy?”

“Not grumpy,” he denied, voice deeper than usual.

She smiled then, reaching up to push back a curl of his hair that had fallen in front of his eyes. Grabbing his face lightly, she used her thumbs to try and smooth out the crinkle in his brow. His gaze softened a touch, but not as much as she had hoped.

“Definitely grumpy about something...”

He sighed. “Just... I mean just because we weren’t allowed to be together today doesn’t mean y’gotta be all over Niall, y’know?” he said softly so no one else could hear.

At first, YN thought he was kidding and started to chuckle. But when his expression didn’t change she realized how serious he truly was.

“Oh babe, I wasn’t all over Niall. He’s a nice friend, gives good hugs. No need to be jealous.” She used a gentle tone, hoping to soften him up a bit.

“‘M not jealous,” he insisted. “It’s just...” he grabbed her hand and pulled her body closer to his, but still not as close as she knew he wanted. Whispering in her ear he finished his sentence, “You’re mine, ok?”

“Course, H. We’re the dream team.”

“No,” he shook his head. “We’ve always been the dream team, but now you’re really mine...”

“Oh.” She didn’t know how else to respond. The comment made her insides feel like melted marshmallows and the campfire that burnt them all at the same time.

“I don’t like to share,” he admitted.

YN stood there for a moment, thinking until a lightbulb went off.

“You don’t have to share me, H. In fact... meet me by the parking lot again tonight. Think it’s a good night for our spot, yeah?”

They agreed, and YN gave him a short kiss on the cheek goodbye, immediately blushing and looking around to see if anyone saw. She thought she might be in the clear, but just in case, she started brainstorming excuses. Harry could apparently see the gears rotating in her head because he cut off her thoughts.

“Tell them it’s a British thing - they won’t know any better.”

And the line worked because the girls definitely had something to say when they were back in the cabin. They were so thoroughly convinced that YN and Harry were in love that the little one started asking things like “What’s the nicest thing he’s ever done for you?” and “Does he like to cuddle at night?” She brushed them off as usual, but it was getting harder every day to keep up the charade. Before they had gotten together it was annoying but fun to field their questions. But now? Now it was getting to be a bit of a struggle because camp rules required them to never find out the truth.

She clicked the walkie-talkie three times as she headed out the door, and smiled when she heard three clicks in return. Practically skipping down the hill, she made her way to the parking lot where Harry was already waiting for her. Although this time she was hoping he had no alcohol with him.

When they were still a few yards away from each other, YN couldn’t help but jog, jumping up into his open arms. She stood on her toes, arms around his neck, and kissed his lips eagerly. It was difficult, though, because both of them were smiling like teenagers.

“Your hair looks nice,” she told him, dragging a hand through his locks after they separated their lips.

“You’re only saying that because you want to get in my pants,” he teased.

She shrugged. “No, I think your hair looks nice and I wanna get in your pants.”

He kissed her nose sweetly and then turned his attention away from her and back to the trunk of his car.

“Listen I have a few things I thought we could bring with us...” he trailed off as he searched around in the endless dark void.

“You are not drugging me up again, Styles,” she demanded.

“Don’t worry babe, wouldn’t even dream of it. I have... ah!” He looked proud of himself as he pulled out what looked to be an old blanket.

“Y’always get cold, even with a sweatshirt, so I thought we’d bring some blankets. And I knew you’d forget your water, so I brought some extra.”

“Take such good care of me, H.”

They walked hand in hand down the path on the way to their old spot, recounting their days to one another. For the first time in a long time, they actually had new information for each other after spending some time apart. One of Harry’s boys might’ve sprained his ankle during sports time, causing a whole scene and refusing to go to the infirmary. And one of YN’s girls had gotten a crush on an older boy that she couldn’t stop talking about. Both of them, it turns out, had to field more questions than usual from their campers regarding their relationship.

“Getting harder to convince them nothin’s happening,” Harry told her. “I think they see the way I look at you.”

They reached their spot, the small stage in the middle of the clearing near the lake. Harry spread out one of the blankets he had brought and they laid down on it, on their backs so they could look up at the sky.

It was quiet, except for the rustling of the trees as the wind blew or the scurrying of a small animal a short distance away. She held his hand, interweaving their fingers as they settled into their peaceful surroundings. Even with all the other new fun things they were doing together, nothing would ever beat this - stargazing in their spot together. And for the first time in a long time, YN’s head wasn’t spinning with scenarios or ideas or questions. She was just content. Harry was with her, the stars were above her, and she was content.

“After the summer, I think we should travel together,” he stated out of nowhere.

She laughed a bit. “Sure, H. You gonna pay for that on your amazing camp salary?”

“I’ll find a way.”

It was quiet again for a moment.

“Can I wear your yellow sunglasses tomorrow?” she asked softly.

“Sure.”

Another pause.

“What do you think the stars would taste like?”

At first, she wasn’t sure if he was serious, but he asked the question softly so she considered it.

“Putting aside the fact that they’re like... fire or whatever...” they both giggled. “I think, like, metaphorically, they look like they taste like honey.”

“Honey?”

“Yeah.”

She didn’t explain. And he didn’t ask.

“Harry?”

“Yeah?”

“I like having you with me.”

“Always been here, babe. Was waiting for you to realize it.”

She rolled over, then, to give him a quick kiss on the lips, though they were both smiling through it making it a bit difficult logistically.

“I just wanna tell everyone that you’re mine,” he admitted quietly.

“Everyone?” YN started. “I think you really just wanted to tell Niall today.”

Harry laughed. “Yeah well... someone has to tell him eventually, hm?”

“Tell him what, exactly?” she challenged.

He looked at her with confusion. “That you’re mine?” His voice went up a bit at the end.

“Is that a question? What... what does being ‘yours’ mean?”

And he answered her question much like he did her question up on the cliff.

“It means this-” He rolled over, kissing her deeply and bringing his hand up to rest on her jaw.

YN wanted more answers, she wanted to get him to actually explain things for once. But more than that she wanted to keep feeling his lips on hers and his hands on her body. She would never get completely used to the feeling of kissing her best friend, but it was so good that the nerves faded away quickly.

She reached to bring one hand up into his hair and the other one around his back. He rolled further on top of her, still hovering a bit but allowing their bodies to touch. She felt surrounded by him, and his smell, and the heat coming from his body. They were rolling around making out on an old blanket atop an abandoned stage, it was comfortable, and she never wanted the feeling to end.

“Haven't... haven’t done much star g-gazing,” she stuttered between kisses.

“Fuck the stars.”

“Or you could fuck me.”

He stopped then, backing his face away from hers so he could look into her eyes. Waiting a moment, he left ample space for her to take back her comment, to say it was a joke, to withdraw consent in any way. But she didn’t. She bit her lip, staring up at him like he was the entire universe, and silently begging him to do more.

“Don’t start something you can’t finish, YN,” he replied breathlessly.

“If I can’t finish, that’s on you.”

He chuckled at her response before kissing her again, this time with more desire and urgency. Using his arms to support himself, he readjusted his legs so one was against her center, and started rolling his hips into her. She gasped into the kiss and he bit down on her lower lip lightly.

Without stopping his movements, he whispered to her between breaths. “I think... you’ve always been mine... just didn’t know how... how to tell me.”

And he wasn’t wrong in that assumption. She had always been his best friend, his default partner, his confidant, his dream team. And he was just as much hers, she just never realized that when he reminded her to drink water or gave her his sweatshirt it was because she had him utterly and completely whipped for her.

“Tellin’ you now...”

“Tell me then. Tell me you’re mine.”

He practically growled at the last phrase, digging his hips into hers with more force and causing her to gasp again. Every bit of his body felt good, and she was only barely touching him. Her grasp in his hair got tighter, and her fingers curled in to grab at his shirt on his back.

“Yours... I’m yours.”

“Fuck.” Harry hung his head low, trying to even out his breathing. “That’s by far the hottest thing you’ve ever said to me... I can’t... YN I can’t wait any longer. Gotta make you mine for real. Gotta... shit.”

“You wanna fuck me?” she filled in for him.

And again he groaned at her words. “Fuck yes, babe. I... shit I don’t have a...”

“It’s ok,” she cut him off. “I... I’ve got an IUD and I’m clean and you...”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m clean. Promise. Shit, you sure you’re ok with this?” he asked, giving her another opportunity to back out.

But she didn’t need it. She was confident that she wanted this as she had never wanted anything else before.

“I... yes Harry,” she told him. “Just...”

His head snapped up to look at her when he sensed her hesitation.

“Just haven’t done this in a while, so I might not be... I’m a bit rusty, ok?”

Harry gave a comforting chuckle.

“Baby, all you gotta do is lay there and look pretty. And you’re doing a damn good job at that. Doesn’t matter what you do, I think I’ve made it pretty clear I’m crazy for you.”

YN wasn’t typically the most assertive in sexual situations, but in this case, she couldn’t wait any longer. She used her leverage on the back of his head to bring his face down closer to hers and continue kissing him, slipping her tongue between his lips until he opened up and allowed for the intrusion. Their tongues worked together, dancing and drawing shapes around each other furiously.

Her grip in his hair tightened again and her hand on his back searched for anything to grab onto. He audibly groaned as she started scratching lightly at his skin. She used the opening to further explore his mouth with her tongue, silently begging him for more.

“Gonna... gonna fuck you so good... make sure everyone knows... knows that you’re mine,” he said between breaths.

“Yes,” she told him. “Yours... I’m yours... make me feel so good...”

He groaned at that, her words clearly affecting him as he left his spot on her mouth and allowed himself to lick and suck at the tender spots on her neck instead. At first, she let out a disappointed whine at the loss of contact, but the disappointment quickly turned into pleasure when he bit down harshly on a soft spot right below her ear.

Slowly, he continued a trail of kisses down her neck, to her chest. Her shirt was in his way and clearly frustrating him.

“Gonna take this off, ok?” he asked, pinching her shirt.

She nodded and sat up a bit to help him lift the shirt over her arms. He had seen her without it many times now, but he still stopped for a moment to stare and appreciate her body in front of him.

Mumbling to himself, she barely heard him say, “shit, y’so fucking beautiful... love y’body so much.” He said it quietly, clearly out of pure admiration.

As she was about to beg him to move, he leaned back down and picked up right where he left off, leaving small, wet kisses to the tops of her breasts. He made his way down a little lower, pulling one of the cups of her bra down and biting down a bit harder just next to her nipple. She whined lightly, but he soothed the area with kisses and then leaned back to admire his work.

He had left a deep, pretty mark, not far from her nipple where it was sure to always be covered. She felt like he was claiming her, and it felt amazing. He continued kissing around the area, hands exploring her body, but he wasn’t moving fast enough.

“Harry... please do something...”

“I am doing something,” he teased.

“Do more.”

“What do you need, darling? Tell me.”

She huffed, grip in his hair once again tightening until she heard him hiss against her skin in response to the pain.

“Touch me,” she breathed. “Need you to touch me.”

“I am touching you.”

“No... touch me... here.”

She took his hand and dragged it down her body to rest above her core. There was a heat swirling in her stomach, stronger than ever before. She could tell she was wet between her thighs and her body had never been more ready for him.

“Shit, YN,” he groaned. “This mine too?”

She nodded her head.

“No. You gotta say it... say it and I’ll touch you.”

“It’s yours.”

“What is?”

“My...my...” in most situations, she hated the word that she knew he was trying to get her to say. But for the first time, she finally understood why it could be so hot because in this moment it was the only word that accurately described not only her body but the way she was feeling. “My pussy is yours.”

And that’s where Harry just lost it. He moaned at her words, hanging his head between his shoulders for a moment to catch his thoughts and his breath, shaking his head.

“The things you do to me...” he mumbled beneath his breath. He looked back up at her, “gonna take this off, ok?” he slipped his finger beneath the waistband of her pants.

She nodded her head, and he got to work stripping her of her pants, then his own top layer of clothing until they were left in their underwear with a blanket draped over them. He kissed around the tops of her breasts before grabbing the other cup of her bra and pulling it down to match the other and expose her to him further. His tongue swirled around her nipple, hand pinching and pulling at the other one.

“Harry,” she gasped between breaths. “Feels good but... want you... please.”

“I know baby, but you know how big I am. Gotta make sure you’re ready for me,” he told her between kisses.

“I’m ready I promise I’m-”

He cut her off with a desperate kiss to her mouth. As she caught her breath, he moved a strand of hair out of her face and behind her ear.

“Know you feel ready. Just want to make sure. Wanna make my girl feel good, yeah?”

She nodded her head silently. Hearing him call her his girl did a number on her, and she felt it deep in her tummy. She was his, she had always been his, and she always wanted to be his.

Harry trailed down her body, leaving a string of kisses in his wake. The moisture from his mouth mixed with the cold night air gave her the chills so she reached for a blanket, but Harry stopped her.

“Take my sweatshirt, babe,” he whispered. “Wanna fuck you in my clothes.”

YN was completely surrounded by all things Harry, then. His blankets, his sweatshirt, his mouth. It all smelled like him and she couldn’t keep from taking a big deep breath inside of the hooded jacket. His smell was so nice - had always been comforting but now even more so. She would buy candles of it if she could.

Harry spread her legs wide, hands on her thighs and thumbs stroking over her skin gently as he looked at her.

“Look at that...” he mumbled, mostly to himself. “So pretty... look at how wet you are, how swollen that clit is. Is that all for me?” He looked back up at YN, waiting for her to answer.

She knew now that he needed to hear her words, so in addition to nodding she told him, “yes, all for you.”

“Because this is my pussy, right?”

“Yes, H. Yours. It’s yours.”

He couldn’t take it any longer and started working over her center with his mouth and his fingers.

“Gonna... make you cum... before I fuck you... make you feel good... then make you... mine,” he told her in a low voice between licking and sucking and kissing on her folds.

She let out an unconscious whimper at that. She knew he would make her feel good - he always did. But something about the way he said it this time made her eyes roll into the back of her head. In desperation, she wanted to respond to him, to hype him up and make him know how wonderful he was making her feel. But she couldn’t get the words out, whines and moans and groans taking their place.

“That’s right... good girl... let it out just like that...'' he encouraged her. “Geez, y’so fuckin’ wet for me.”

With one hand he stroked her inside walls, driving her crazy, the other sitting firmly on the inside of her thigh to open her back up again every time she tried to close around his head. His hand was a warm and comforting presence on the cold and quiet night, and she let out a gentle sigh. Her sigh was cut off though, and turned into a bit of a squeal as he sucked harder on her clit, curling his fingers inside of her and hitting her best spot. His tongue lapped at her wet folds, hungrily taking everything she would give him.

It didn’t take long - it never did with Harry. Compared to the other guys she had been with who never made her cum even once, Harry’s ability to do it so quickly and consistently blew her mind. He knew what he was doing before he even touched her, but then he took the time to learn her body too. Harry knew what she liked, what felt the best, what drove her over the edge. He knew which pulls of his hair meant she was feeling good and which meant that he needed to slow down and give her a break. He knew the way her body shuddered when the pressure was building, and he knew the way she tasted after that bubble burst.

Usually, after she finished, he would kiss back up her body until he reached her mouth and whisper sweet things to her as she came down from her high. But this time, he kept working where he was. He was gentler on her sensitive nub, but his fingers moved faster. He spread her out, opening her up for him and adding in a third finger. YN gasped at that, one hand flying to her own chest and the other finding purchase in Harry’s hair again.

“H... fuck... s’a lot... feels... a lot,” she told him from above.

“I know darling,” he comforted her, removing his mouth and leaving careful kisses at the top of her thighs. “But m’cock is gonna be even more. You still want it, right?”

He was giving her another out, an easy out, and wanted to make sure. They both knew that once you fuck your best friend, there’s no going back. But YN never wanted to go back. It didn’t even feel possible to go back. She just wanted him. And she told him as much.

“H... make me yours... I want... I wanna be yours.”

Harry sat up on his knees then, one hand with fingers still inside of her and the other getting to work on his own briefs. His cock sprang free, hard as ever and practically leaking from the purple tip. YN’s eyes went straight to it, as they always did. She could never get herself to look away. He looked too pretty. And that pretty thing was about to be inside of her.

She moaned his name, begging him to hurry up, and he got the message. Removing his fingers from her, he made a show of licking each one. He tapped her bottom lip and she opened her mouth, where he inserted his first two fingers. She closed around him and sucked lightly, tasting herself on his skin.

“Fuck,” he groaned at the sight.

“Yeah, that’s what I’m waiting for,” she teased back.

He chuckled before hovering his body over hers and lining up his cock with her center. Slowly he dragged the tip up and down her folds until she let out another little whimper.

“You want my cock?” he asked her.

“Yes.”

“Lemme hear you say it. Tell me what you want.”

She took a breath. “Want... want your cock, Harry. Want to feel you inside of me. Want-”

He cut her off then as he entered her, entering her slowly and stretching her out.

She let out little gasps as he went deeper.

“Good girl... know you can take me...”

She couldn’t help but moan at his words, but her eyes were screwed shut.

“Look at me, baby. Please...” Harry begged her softly, his words practically a whine.

Opening her eyes, she gazed up at him like he hung the stars and the moon. But when he pushed in a little further she squeezed her eyes closed again, the feeling tight and the stretch a little tingly.

“S’really big, H.”

“Relax, baby,” he whispered, kissing her forehead. “Gotta relax for me, let me in...”

She let out a deep breath signally for him to continue until she was completely full of him. Waiting a moment, he gave her time to get used to his size, and he took a moment to get used to the feeling of her around him.

“Fuck baby, ‘slike you were made for me,” he whispered into her ear.

She whined at that, and he took it as a sign to start moving. He started slowly, both of them moaning at the feeling. Dropping his head down to her shoulder, he bit down lightly, causing her to gasp. Her hands came up to his hair and his back again and she held onto him like he was going to float away if she didn’t.

“Feel so good,” he whispered. “So fuckin’ tight. So...fuck... so good... y’pussy feels like heaven. M’not gonna last very long.”

“That’s ok, just... just keep going. You’re so big... stretching me... so deep... fuck... Harry, please.”

She didn’t know what she was begging for, but she knew he would give it to her. And he did, as his hips started snapping against her harder and faster. Her moans and groans and gasps filled the air around them, but neither of them cared since they were far away enough from the rest of the camp. It was just them, under the stars, together.

“Sound so pretty,” he mumbled between thrusts as she gasped and moaned into the night air. “Best sound in the world... wanna hear that... hear you all the fucking time,” he groaned.

Harry reached down again then, rubbing her clit with his thumb as his thrusting continued. She accidentally held her breath, only releasing it when his lips met hers in a sloppy kiss. Their lips hardly even touched as they panted into each other's mouths, savoring the feeling and the moment they were having together.

Her hands frantically searched for something to grab onto on his back, but upon finding nothing she resigned to digging her nails into him lightly. Apparently, that was the right decision, because his movements only sped up more.

“Tell me how you feel,” he instructed her.

“So good... fuck H you feel... I can’t even...” she let out another gasp as his tip went deeper than ever before, and she felt his smirk against her own lips.

“Too good for words, hm?”

She nodded her head in agreement.

They were both trying to hold off for as long as possible, but with the days, weeks, and years of build-up, it was nearly impossible. Both of them knew it was going to be over soon, but neither of them wanted it to end.

“Fuck... Harry,” she moaned again as he increased the pressure rubbing on her clit. Her body reacted to the change, contracting on his dick and making him see all the stars that were never there.

“Think you can... can cum again?” he asked her.

“I don’t... maybe but...”

“Gonna make my girl cum again,” he stated, sure of himself.

“Yes, yes I’m yours,” she cried out again, followed by a long whine as the head of his cock brushed against her g-spot.

He lifted her legs then, her knees bending over his shoulders as he pushed into her again, the new angle giving him deeper access. From higher above her, he could see her breasts wiggling with the movement of her entire body. But she could tell he was looking mostly at the place where they connected, where it was wet and messy and amazing.

“Mine,” he growled again.

She nodded her head, unable to make any words come out of her mouth anymore. There was too much happening all at once. The pressure building in her lower stomach, her clit throbbing below Harry’s thumb, her walls being stretched by his length. It was so much, too much.

“Too much,” she told him.

“Want me to stop?”

“NO!”

“Then it’s not... not too much,” he concluded, never losing his pace.

“Gonna... soon... almost...” she still couldn’t get her words out, but he was able to decipher her message.

“It’s alright baby,” he whispered. “Cum for me. Want you to cum again for me. Then I’ll cum inside this pretty pussy... my pretty pussy... make you mine. All mine.”

And she completely lost it at his words. Her back arched up and she pressed up into his warm chest. Her head rolled back as much as it could on the hard surface and her eyes squeezed closed as she felt tears starting to form at the edges of her vision. The feeling was white hot, like a star exploding somewhere in distant space, a mess to experience but beautiful to the viewer.

So beautiful, in fact, that Harry let his own release go shortly after. He shot ropes and ropes of warm cum, filling her. His hips kept moving, thrusting slower but not giving up, even though he was through. She whimpered at the feeling, both of them fucked raw. When he was too sensitive and just couldn’t take it anymore, his hips eventually stilled. He kissed her neck and shoulder until he could catch his breath but made no move to slip out from inside of her. As they both caught their breaths, YN started rubbing Harry’s back lightly. He hummed at the feeling.

“Harry?”

“Yeah?”

“You never... you never answered my question?”

“Which question darling?”

YN tried to think back, her mind still foggy from the two intense orgasms.

“What do you mean when you say I’m yours?”

There was silence for a moment, their hearts beating in unison but still fast. Most if not all of his weight was on her, and his body was like a furnace keeping her warm.

“Means I get to do that again.”

“Will you still be my best friend?”

He laughed at that, before realizing she was serious.

“Of course, sweetheart. Always. Best friend, dream team, girlfriend. They aren’t mutually exclusive.”

“Girlfriend?” she asked, a cheerfulness in her voice.

“Mhmm...if that’s... if you want that?”

“Yes!” she answered quickly. “Want it with you.”

Harry smiled before kissing her lips lightly. She could see his pupils were still mostly blown out, although it might have been a reaction to the dark night around them illuminated only by the stars above, which they had stopped looking at ages ago.

“Alright then,” he started. “Looks like we should probably get my girlfriend cleaned up and ready for bed, hm?”

He made a move to change his position, to pull out of her and do what he had said, but she stopped him with a firm grip.

“Not yet, just... lemme stay like this for a couple more minutes.”

MASTERLIST | PATREON | USS TAG | WRITING TAG

Deleted Scene - Campout Extra 1: Lemon Over Ice

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gimmethatagustd · 3 months

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venor (4) | kth + jjk

The barista at the university’s café keeps telling Jungkook not to come back, but Jungkook is too busy daydreaming about kissing the beauty marks on his face to be paying attention to his warnings.

○ Pairing: Tiger!Taehyung x Bunny!Jungkook

○ Rating: Explicit/18+

○ Genre: Hybrids, predator/prey, college au, strangers to lovers, slow burn, fluff, light angst, eventual smut

○ Word Count: 5,275

○ Warnings: None

○ Notes: Did Jai get tired of making the messaging graphics and is now just doing plain text? Yes. Are we gonna talk about it? No.

○ Post Date: February 25, 2024

○ Masterlist | AO3 Cross-Post

○ What was Jai listening to? The series playlist

Series Masterlist

vante95

what’s up?

“Suyun! Suyun! Suyun!”

Jungkook launches himself from his seat and bolts to the opposite side of the room, where Suyun is still drawing her scary equations and chemistry things on the whiteboard. He shoves his phone in front of her face and waggles it until she grabs his wrist to hold him in place.

“Calm down, young man.” She glares at Jungkook, but it’s not at all menacing, and they both know it.

It would be nice, but Jungkook can’t calm down. Every vein in his body jitters with something terrifyingly electric, like he stuck his finger in an outlet and tried to walk through the aftershocks. It makes him feel like he might pass out, but in a good way.

Maybe Jungkook needs to chill out.

Maybe Jungkook isn’t worried about that, though. What’s so bad about having a little crush? Jungkook has never actually had one, not a real one, so he thinks it might be nice to lean into it. Suyun encouraged him to reach out to Taehyung anyway. Jungkook would argue that he can’t be held responsible.

“What should I say?” Jungkook bounces on the balls of his feet, and he’s glad his shirt is long enough to hide his tail because it might be wiggling. Perhaps. No one needs to know.

“Oh no, I’m terrible at this,” Suyun hands Jungkook his phone. She pouts with a shrug. “I don’t even know how I got Jackson to date me. I’m terrible at small talk and flirting.”

Looks like Jungkook is on his own.

He plops in his seat, homework assignments forgotten. With his chest pressed against the edge of the table and his arms stretched out in front of him, Jungkook lets out a long, pitiful groan.

jkookie

Just studying with my friend 😊 What about you?

vante95

that’s cute

i’m taking a break at work

yknow at my job at a cafe for predators only

jkookie

🫠 I don’t think it’s fair to ban prey from going! The donuts are so good

vante95

so the donuts are why you keep showing up

that the only reason?

jkookie

... Yes

vante95

mhm

interesting

jkookie

Is it?? They’re good! I love the powder sugar ones and the sprinkles

vante95

i would’ve thought you’d like the striped ones

jkookie

I’ve never had the striped ones before

vante95

lol

cute

anyway

if you’re gonna keep being difficult about this at least promise me something

jkookie

👀 What?

vante95

only come during my shift

jkookie

Why?

vante95

so i can make sure no one eats you

“Oh, that’s kinky,” Suyun announces over Jungkook’s shoulder. “Tell him you want him to eat you.”

“Suyun!” With a gasp, Jungkook turns in his chair to stare at Suyun, wide-eyed and innocent.

“I don’t know. It seemed like a logical next step. He kind of lobbed it to you, right?” Suyun shrugs and returns to the whiteboard. “Make the basket, Jungkookie.”

Suyun has definitely been spending too much time with Jackson.

jkookie

Am I supposed to believe that your being there will matter?

It’s a risky text to send. Jungkook worries he comes off rude, especially when it takes a bit longer for Taehyung to respond than it did for his other texts. Before he can get too worked up about it, Jungkook reminds himself that Taehyung is at work. He might be slow to respond because he’s busy — which technically Jungkook is, too, but he decides that taking a little break from homework is needed.

Taehyung’s following text message comes a few minutes later, and Jungkook lets out a little groan because why is Taehyung’s level of cockiness so attractive? It shouldn’t be a surprise; Taehyung carries himself confidently, which was apparent from when Jungkook first met him.

vante95

i’m kind of a big deal

jkookie

What are you, their alpha??

vante95

did you really just ask that

jkookie

I have to go now

Bye

vante95

lol

see you tomorrow bun

Cheeks aflame, Jungkook slips his phone into his pocket and tells himself that he will not, under any circumstances, look at it until later tonight, after he’s finished his homework and gotten dinner with Yoongi. It’s their night to cook together once Yoongi gets home from work.

It doesn’t take long for Jungkook to finish the work that requires his immediate attention. He’ll deal with the other assignments later, like the Art History assignment Professor Jung referred to during class. Jungkook still hasn’t settled on a topic for that one yet. It isn’t that he’s slacking; in reality, he has many potential project topics he’s interested in and is having trouble narrowing down the list. Perhaps he’ll find time to stop by Professor Jung’s office later in the week to ask for help.

Saying goodbye to Suyun, Jungkook braves the dying evening heat to head to the train station. There isn’t a grocery store within walking distance of the university with all the ingredients he and Yoongi need for dakgalbi, so Jungkook has to travel a few blocks south to reach the neighborhood grocery store.

Jungkook doesn’t mind the commute or having to meander through aisles looking for red chili paste, shishito peppers, and cooking wine. Growing up with overprotective parents meant Jungkook spent much time trailing behind them, running errands, and learning about adult responsibilities. Time spent alone or with kids his age wasn’t a luxury he got to experience often, though he cherished those moments when he got the opportunity to.

So, Jungkook enjoys searching for groceries. He likes the colorful products lining the shelves, the slightly stale smell of some older grocery stores, and the dark markings of rubber-soled shoes smudged on the linoleum. Lately, errands like this have made him miss his parents, but not enough to truly consider himself homesick. His drive for independence prevents him from getting too nostalgic.

Hunger encourages Jungkook to finish up his grocery shopping quickly. He forces himself only to buy what’s needed and manages to fit most of the items in his backpack. With the wine in a grocery bag looped through his fingers and his backpack sitting on his lap, Jungkook watches the neighborhoods blur on the train ride back to campus.

The train isn’t separated by predators and prey like the university is. Most of the public isn’t, at least not legally. Jungkook has noticed that prey tend to flock together, rarely intermingling with predators unless necessary. It’s hard in an oppressive society where predators are always on top, even in a progressive city like Seoul.

Jungkook never thought about how predators and prey interact until he moved. Now, though, he notices so much more — like the group of predators who enter his train car a few stops before they reach the university. He recognizes a few of them, particularly the wolf hybrid from Taehyung’s friend group. The group doesn’t pay Jungkook any mind, quickly shuffling past him toward the back of the car, where there are more seats.

Disappointment uncoils inside Jungkook when he doesn’t see a messy head of copper curls follow the wolf hybrid when he walks past where Jungkook sits, but he reminds himself that Taehyung is at work.

It’s for the best that Jungkook has no distractions on his way home. Poor Yoongi will be waiting for him.

The third time Jungkook visits Venor Cafe, Taehyung is working behind the counter. He stands with his hip propped against the edge of the counter and talks to the snow leopard hybrid while she counts money at the register. The bills make a papery sound as she flips them between her fingers with practiced precision. She doesn’t look up when the bell over the front door rings, but Taehyung does.

Taehyung easily maintains his conversation with his coworker while his sharp feline eyes stalk Jungkook to the counter. The look on Taehyung’s face is nothing short of predatory, but all Jungkook can focus on is his comforting scent. He wonders whether Taehyung’s scent spiked when Jungkook entered the cafe or if it’s all in his head.

“Give us a sec,” the snow leopard gestures to the open register drawer when Jungkook approaches.

Jungkook nods and gives himself a moment to check out his surroundings. A handful of other customers are scattered around the cafe, none that catch Jungkook’s attention. He only has eyes for the tiger behind the counter, and Taehyung definitely has his eyes on him, too.

“Bun.” Taehyung leans his forearms on the counter, bringing him closer to where Jungkook stands just half a step back.

“Hi,” Jungkook says with a cheerful smile that isn’t returned. “How are you doing today?”

The snow leopard snorts, and Taehyung’s pretty mouth twitches at the corners. His dark eyes flit to the backpack slung over one of Jungkook’s shoulders, and Jungkook notices that Taehyung is wearing thin, black eyeliner, making his expression pointed.

“I’m assuming you plan on staying in here?”

He ignores Jungkook’s question about his day. It’s rude, but Jungkook will let it pass because Taehyung looks exceptionally fluffy today, and it’s doing something to his chest.

“Yup. I’m starting a new routine.”

“Oh?”

“Mhm, this is my time to decompress after class before my shift at the library starts.”

Taehyung bites the inside of his cheek, eyes flashing with something Jungkook can’t read. He straightens up to let his coworker pass, taking her apron before she disappears into the backdoor marked for employees only.

“That’s nice,” Taehyung comments, tone flat and almost bored. “Listen, bun, you’re gonna do me a favor and sit right there.” Dipping his head, Taehyung gestures to the large couch and well-worn leather armchairs directly across from the register.

Jungkook turns around to look at the seating arrangement. The chairs surround a glass coffee table stacked with old university event fliers and a few tiny potted succulents. The furniture looks comfortable, and Jungkook spots an outlet nearby.

“Why?” Jungkook asks, turning back to face the counter.

“I already told you.” Taehyung’s eyes travel down Jungkook’s body, pausing where his crop top exposes a hint of his midriff. “Gotta make sure nobody eats you.”

Blinking rapidly, Jungkook hurriedly breaks eye contact with Taehyung as a flush spreads up his neck and across his face. Never has he felt so attuned to his instincts as he does now, his entire body prickly and on edge. Taehyung makes Jungkook want to run.

No, Taehyung makes Jungkook want to be chased.

Shaken by that realization, Jungkook jerks into action. He gives Taehyung a quick nod and turns to the leather couch. On his way to getting settled, he nearly knocks over the succulents and sends a few fliers shooting into the air and fluttering to the floor like autumn leaves.

“Sorry, sorry,” Jungkook murmurs, snatching the papers and trying to ignore the low chuckle coming from behind the counter, eventually drowned out by the sound of the espresso machine.

Despite the unexpected start to his “Decompress Time,” Jungkook finds his rhythm rather quickly. The leather couch is worn but comfortable, with plush cushions that form to Jungkook from years of being well-loved by loyal customers. He rests his tablet on the arm of the couch to prop it up at a comfortable angle so he can work on his comic.

A busy schedule has prevented him from progressing much, but Jungkook has learned not to shame himself for moving slowly. Hobbies are meant to be fun; there’s no use making himself miserable over something that should bring him joy.

Perhaps Jungkook enjoys it a little too much, getting lost in the colorful worlds he creates with furrowed brows and a stylus gripped in one hand. After a while, the rest of the world grows fuzzy and desaturated, like the unfinished background of a lesser scene in Jungkook’s comic. He doesn’t notice the figure looming over him until his backpack is pushed to the side on the glass coffee table.

“One iced mocha latte.”

“But…” Jungkook watches Taehyung place the drink on the coffee table in front of him. “I didn’t order anything.”

Taehyung gives Jungkook a blank expression for half a beat before turning his back on Jungkook’s confusion and returning to the register as a few more customers trickle in. There’s no use in calling after him; Jungkook would prefer not to draw attention to himself, and he wouldn’t want Taehyung to get in trouble — since it mustn’t be allowed, right? To give away free drinks?

It’s hard to ignore the fuzzy feeling Jungkook gets in his chest when he picks up the drink and gives himself a moment to process that Taehyung remembered his order from weeks ago. Jungkook has seen the cafe during busy hours; he’s sure Taehyung has far too many customers to remember orders, yet Taehyung remembered his.

The drink is in a disposable paper coffee cup. Disappointment nips Jungkook in the heart when he realizes Taehyung has put his drink in a to-go cup as if to subliminally tell him to leave. Jungkook twists the cup in his hand and notices something scribbled with a permanent marker on the side — a small cartoon bunny with floppy ears and large, starry eyes. Underneath the drawing in messy handwriting is the simple greeting, Hi, bun.

Jungkook isn’t sure how much blushing he can take today. His body is heating up so severely that he’s worried his scent might start spiking from embarrassment in the middle of a predators’ hangout.

Taking a deep breath, he risks looking at the counter. Perhaps there is a different edge to Jungkook’s scent, or Taehyung has an uncanny sixth sense, but his eyes immediately lock with Taehyung’s. Like before, Taehyung’s expression is unreadable. Their connection is broken with a blink, and Taehyung focuses on tending to the next customer in line to order. Only the twitch of his striped ears give a hint that he might still be paying attention to the bunny across the room.

Jungkook takes a sip of his drink to stop himself from grinning.

Over the next few weeks, Jungkook visits Venor Cafe fairly regularly. He doesn’t come in during all of Taehyung’s shifts; Yoongi thoroughly explained how creepy that would make Jungkook seem. Jungkook doesn’t see the harm in it, but he trusts his hyung to know about these things — even if Yoongi tends to overthink quite a lot.

Besides, Jungkook knows that Taehyung enjoys having him around. Why else would he continue drawing adorable bunnies on Jungkook’s cups and leaving little messages on his napkins?

Sometimes, Taehyung is too busy to talk to Jungkook. On those days, Jungkook receives even more hidden messages accompanied by drinks and snacks that Jungkook doesn’t order but appear on the coffee table anyway.

From what Jungkook has observed, most of the employees are college students who aren’t the most ambitious and don’t always take their jobs seriously. They aren’t like Taehyung, who works hard and is attentive to his customers, no matter how tired he may seem. It’s admirable, and Jungkook likes how the more he gets to know Taehyung, the more he proves those terrible stereotypes people feed about predators wrong.

Even the other predators at the cafe don’t seem too bad. By now, Jungkook has spent hours on the leather couch that always seems free, even when the rest of the cafe is crowded, and he has never been treated poorly by the other customers. He’s starting to think everyone is overreacting. What are they seeing in the world that Jungkook can’t?

Considering he has no other predator friends, Jungkook figures he may as well ask Taehyung all his questions. But, first, he has an important matter to settle.

“So, why are you in a prey class?”

“I can’t talk to you, bun. I’m working.”

“You were behind the counter texting someone not even five minutes ago,” Jungkook challenges with a toothy grin, “Answer my question.”

Looking up from where he’s wiping off one of the tables, Taehyung gives Jungkook a long stare. His hair is pushed away from his face today, held back by a black bandana to match his all-black outfit. Nothing should be so attractive about a black t-shirt and jeans, especially not all-black Air Forces, yet Jungkook can’t get over how pretty Taehyung is.

What’s even more adorable is how the two of them probably look together, staring each other down in the back corner of the cafe, Taehyung in all black and Jungkook in pastels.

“I thought bunnies were supposed to be timid,” Taehyung finally comments with an arched brow.

“I’m not like most bunnies.”

Jungkook regrets his response the moment he gives it and internally cringes. Taehyung’s laughter makes it worse.

“Cute.” Taehyung smirks, the tip of his striped tail flicking from where he tucks it in the string ties of his apron. The placement keeps his tail out of the way as he works. Earlier, Jungkook almost stepped on it while following Taehyung around the cafe, and he isn’t particularly interested in finding out what an angry tiger looks like.

“I’m taking it because the timing for our class session conflicted with my schedule, and I needed to take this one now since I want to graduate a semester early. Trust me, I wouldn’t take a class with prey if I didn’t have to. No offense.”

“Why not?”

Taehyung rolls his eyes. “You’re something special, aren’t you?”

“Yes, I am,” Jungkook agrees with more confidence than he should have for someone unsure if Taehyung’s comment was a compliment.

With a shake of his head and a laugh that’s a rush of air through his nostrils, Taehyung fights the urge to smile as he resumes cleaning the messy table. Jungkook should probably return to his seat, but he’s having more fun bouncing on the balls of his feet while Taehyung scrubs at a sticky spot on the table. Part of that fun might be because the veins in Taehyung’s forearms become more defined as he scrubs harder and his bicep bulges against the tight cuff of his t-shirt.

“Bun.”

Blinking, Jungkook looks up to meet the heartstopping smirk on Taehyung’s face.

“Um, yes?”

Taehyung gestures to the side of his head, grin growing wider when Jungkook lifts his hand. One of Jungkook’s ears has fallen from inside his bucket hat, exposing it to the whole cafe. Jungkook quickly shoves it back inside the hat, having sworn he’d tied both back adequately, stress radiating from his trembling body.

“Hey, hey,” Taehyung’s warm fingers encircle Jungkook’s wrist and pull his hand away from his head. “It’s okay.”

“I’m not—”

“Can I tell you something?” Taehyung interrupts. He waits for Jungkook to nod before continuing, “It doesn’t matter if you hide your ears or tail, bun. We all know what you are, even without seeing them.”

“What do you mean?” When Jungkook’s face scrunches with confusion, Taehyung taps the tip of Jungkook’s wiggly nose with his index finger.

“Our senses are sharper than yours. Prey smell different.” Taehyung slips the cleaning rag into his apron’s pocket. He looks amused, as though there’s a secret joke to what he’s said that Jungkook doesn’t understand.

Unsure of how to respond, Jungkook stands with his fingers nervously tapping against his thighs and waits with bated breath as Taehyung plucks his hat from his head.

“I like your ears. They’re cute,” Taehyung murmurs just quiet enough for Jungkook to hear. He holds the hat out for Jungkook to take, then turns on his heel without another word, leaving Jungkook flustered — not for the first time, and certainly not for the last.

At some point, Suyun starts hanging out with Jungkook at Venor Cafe. The first time she visits the cafe is with Jackson, who Jungkook is surprised to learn is friends with Taehyung. Considering how tall and athletic they are, the fact that the two predators play on the university’s basketball team makes sense to Jungkook. A fox hybrid, Jackson moves elegantly and is quick on his feet, bouncing around as he playfully tussles with Taehyung before the start of his shift. The obnoxious display of predatory behavior makes Suyun roll her eyes, though her cheeks grow pink whenever Jackson smiles at her from across the cafe.

It’s disgusting couple behavior in the kind of way that Jungkook thinks he would quite literally die to experience himself.

Luckily, Jackson doesn’t frequent the cafe — not that Jungkook doesn’t like him. It’s merely that Jungkook enjoys spending time with Suyun, and it’s easier when Jackson doesn’t serve as a distraction.

Suyun argues that Jungkook gets distracted by a particular employee, but she doesn’t tease him too badly about it. Jungkook is grateful for that, considering someone else does enough teasing.

“Two spooky pumpkin cinnamon donuts with chocolate drizzle.”

Taehyung places two small plates on the coffee table in front of the leather couch — which has become Jungkook’s couch at this point. He has yet to arrive at the cafe to find it already occupied. What strange luck.

“We didn’t order—”

“Shhh,” Taehyung interrupts Suyun with a finger to his lips. “It’s officially autumn, and Jungkook has never had striped donuts.”

A wink is Taehyung’s goodbye as he returns to his work duties, leaving the pastries behind. They look delicious, and having tried the cafe’s other donuts, Jungkook is confident they won’t disappoint. He picks one up and cups his other hand underneath it to catch the cinnamon crumbles that might fall from it when he takes a bite.

“Jungkook,” Suyun whispers as she watches him chew.

“Hmm?”

“He gave you an orange donut with brown stripes.”

Jungkook nods with a little hum of appreciation. The donut is really good.

“Do you not get it…?” Suyun’s eyes widen, and her large, round ears perk up. She smacks Jungkook on the thigh with her whip-like tail when he doesn’t say anything, making him yelp. “Orange with stripes! Jungkook! The tiger just fed you an orange donut with brown stripes.”

Jungkook’s entire body shivers with realization. “Ohh…”

“Yeah,” Suyun scoffs, shaking her head. “Yeah."

“I mean, it’s just a seasonal donut. It doesn’t, like, mean something.” Jungkook gestures to the cafe’s large front windows as if to point out the trees' changing color and the skittering leaves along the sidewalk. “Right?”

Suyun shrugs and reaches for her own donut. “I don’t know… Is it normal for him to give you free food like this?”

Jungkook nods, and something weird inside him makes his stomach flutter when Suyun hums in surprise.

“Well… That’s… I mean, that’s interesting.”

Setting his tablet and stylus on the coffee table, Jungkook turns on the couch to face Suyun. “What do you mean? What’s interesting?”

When Suyun shakes her head, Jungkook musters up the most pathetic pout he can come up with.

“Suyun, please tell me. I don’t understand.”

“You’re ridiculous,” she mutters with a roll of her eyes. “It probably doesn’t mean anything at all. It’s just that sometimes gift-giving is a, um, it’s a component of—”

Before Suyun can finish her botched explanation, Taehyung appears beside the couch. He’s engrossed in something on his phone and no longer wearing his apron.

“Scoot over, bun. I’m taking my break,” Taehyung demands as he wiggles in between Jungkook and the arm of the couch.

Startled, Jungkook scrambles to the middle of the couch, giving Taehyung more room. He’s reminded of how big Taehyung is, with spread thighs and broad shoulders that brush against Jungkook’s. Today, they’re both in jeans, though Jungkook is wearing an oversized v-neck sweater, whereas Taehyung is in a plain t-shirt. It’s getting cold outside, but Taehyung’s body seems to run hot.

This is the closest they’ve ever been, and Jungkook feels like he can’t breathe.

“Is that me?”

Suyun smacks Jungkook on the arm, bringing his attention to Taehyung’s gaze. Following it, his stomach overturns with nausea when he realizes what Taehyung is looking at.

“What? No!” Jungkook snatches his tablet and holds it to his chest like a teenage girl who has had her diary read. “Why would it be you?”

Taehyung rests his elbow on the arm of the couch and holds his chin in his hand. His boxy mouth curves into a small smile, though Jungkook isn’t fooled. The giddy look on Taehyung’s face is mocking.

What can he expect, really? Taehyung has just seen the portrait Jungkook has been drawing of him.

“Let me see it.”

“No.”

“If it’s not me, why can’t I?” Taehyung’s grin is sharp, canines glinting in the natural lighting.

Jungkook thinks about how Suyun said he should let Taehyung eat him.

“It’s not good…” Jungkook makes up an excuse. The portrait is good; Jungkook has been working on it for weeks. He told himself he needed a break from working on his comic and wanted to practice realism.

Really, he just likes looking at Taehyung.

“Y’know, bun, I’m majoring in Museum Studies and Studio Art,” Taehyung speaks casually as though he isn’t at all phased by the fact that some prey hybrid who thrust himself into his life has been creepily drawing him while he works. “I know a thing or two about good art.”

Jungkook knew this. He was surprised when he first learned that Taehyung wanted to work as a curator or exhibition designer in a museum. It was a cool career aspiration that Jungkook had never considered, probably because his mind was always clouded by the financial stability entering the tech industry could bring him. Now that he knows more about what’s out there in the world, he sometimes has his regrets.

“That makes me want to show you even less,” Jungkook mumbles, sneakily turning off the tablet and returning it to the coffee table. “Maybe some other time.”

Jungkook doesn’t know why he pseudo-promises a future where Taehyung may see his artwork, but he can’t help it. Maybe it’s the enthralling look in Taehyung’s eyes when he realized the drawing was of himself. Maybe it’s the warmth of Taehyung’s tail resting on Jungkook’s thigh.

Maybe Jungkook is actually losing his mind.

“I’ll hold you to that, bun,” Taehyung says with a grin. His eyes roam Jungkook’s face like he’s committing it to memory or searching for something amongst the scar on his cheek and the beauty mark under his bottom lip.

The bell above the cafe’s front door rings, drawing Taehyung’s attention away from Jungkook. A group of predators enters, led by the wolf hybrid Jungkook has unfortunately run across far too many times lately. It’s odd to see the same person so often, especially in such a large city as Seoul.

“Hoseok hyung!” Taehyung waves at one of the men. For a moment, Jungkook fears that Taehyung is calling over the wolf hybrid, but instead, a snake hybrid breaks off from the group to weave through the tables.

“Taehyungie, what’s up? Are you not working today?”

Jungkook doesn’t miss how Hoseok eyes him and Suyun. However, he doesn’t know how to interpret the snake hybrid’s expression. The slitted eyes throw him off.

“Nah, I’m just taking a break. You guys still going over to Byungchul’s later?”

When Hoseok nods, the white scales that contour his face and collarbones glitter.

“Are you?”

“Of course. I need a fucking break,” Taehyung groans, leaning his head back on the couch.

“Bringing your… friends with you?” Hoseok’s eyes sweep over him and Suyun, again hard to read.

Taehyung shifts slightly, and Jungkook tries to scoot over to give him more room. Taehyung stops him by wrapping his arm around Jungkook’s shoulders and gently drawing him into his side. Rather than be startled by Taehyung’s sudden out-of-character behavior, Jungkook melts into his embrace. Taehyung’s body is warm and firm, and his scent is so calming that Jungkook feels like he can fall asleep from how comfortable he is. He doesn’t even bother wondering why Taehyung is acting this way.

“Oh! I’m hanging out with Jackson’s family this weekend,” Suyun turns to give Jungkook an apologetic look. “I’m sorry, I completely forgot to tell you.”

As part of their Art History class final project, they’re supposed to visit a new ancient Egyptian art exhibit at the National Museum of Korea. Jungkook and Suyun had plans to go together over the weekend.

“It’s okay,” Jungkook reassures her with a small smile. He doesn’t mind going to the museum alone.

Taehyung squeezes Jungkook’s shoulder. When Jungkook turns to look up at him, he still has his eyes on Hoseok. It’s a nice view, though. Jungkook can admire the curl of Taehyung’s pretty eyelashes and the jut of his plump lips. He has to fight the urge to nuzzle into his neck.

“He better not fucking bring any prey.”

Jungkook feels Taehyung tense as the wolf hybrid saunters to stand beside Hoseok. There’s something slimy about him, even beyond his gross comments toward Jungkook on his first day of school.

“That’s no way to speak about your hyung, Byungchul.” Taehyung’s response is clipped, a tone Jungkook isn’t familiar hearing from him.

Byungchul crosses his arms against his chest as if to puff himself up. He’s more muscular than Taehyung, but he isn’t as tall or broad, and he looks silly, forcing himself to seem bigger than he really is.

“You’ve already tainted the only predator cafe in the neighborhood by letting them in,” Byungchul gestures to Jungkook and Suyun, who frowns at him in a way she probably thinks is intimidating. “There’s no way you’re ruining our hangouts, too.”

The words don’t necessarily sting because Jungkook doesn’t know Byungchul, but they make him uneasy. It seems like a threat, something Jungkook has never experienced before. He’s never experienced any kind of discrimination before.

Standing up, Taehyung gets in Byungchul’s face, though Byungchul doesn’t back down.

“If you have a problem with them being here, you can leave.”

Jungkook, Suyun, and Hoseok watch silently as the two predators size each other up. Clearly, neither wants to back down, but Taehyung has an advantage over Byungchul because of his age and the fact that he works at the cafe. Eventually, Byungchul backs away with a glare in Jungkook and Suyun’s direction.

“Fine,” Byungchul grunts. He’s quick to turn his back on the group and shoulder through the front door, flinging it open hard enough that it’s loud when it slams closed behind him.

“What a little shit,” Hoseok says with a cackle that shows all his teeth. They’re pointy, too. Never has Jungkook been around so much danger. “He’ll never survive in the real world.”

Taehyung isn’t as amused. He motions for Jungkook and Suyun to get up once Hoseok has fallen into the line at the register.

“Can you please leave?” Taehyung asks with a weary sigh. Jungkook knows he and Suyun don’t have a say in the matter.

On another day, Jungkook would be sad, but he feels relieved to leave the cafe when Taehyung asks. He and Suyun don’t bother looking back when they slip out the front door like teens sneaking out of the house, careful not to draw attention to themselves.

“What bullshit,” Suyun huffs once they’re out of earshot of the cafe. She kicks a stray pebble on the sidewalk and watches it ricochet off a nearby tree.

“Do you have to deal with that kind of stuff a lot? Because of Jackson?” Jungkook asks quietly. He’s still shaken up, even if he doesn’t want to admit it.

Suyun shakes her head. “Most of his friends are pretty chill. Byungchul has something wrong with him.”

Clearly, Jungkook thinks as they make their way to the library. Maybe some predators are rotten apples.

Series Masterlist

Disclaimer: All my writing is fictional and for entertainment purposes only. None of these characters are meant to actually represent the real people mentioned in the stories.

All rights reserved © @gimmethatagustd - Do not copy, repost, modify, or translate any of my writing. Do not use my writing for any AI purposes whatsoever. Do not use my fics for anything aside from reading and commenting on them. My fics will only be posted on this Tumblr and on AO3 (gimmethatagustd &daddytaehyungie). Request an AO3 account here.

#taehyung x jungkook #bts fanfic #bts smut #bts fluff #venor #jai writes #gimmethatagustd #taekook fanfic

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pascalispretty · 1 year

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Aches and Pains

Joel Miller x F!Reader

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 2155

Warnings: showering together, comfort sex, general post-apocalyptic trauma, dirty talk, riding, unsafe sex

Summary: You know Joel has had an awful day, and you’re determined to help soothe his aches and pains in any way you can. Ambiguous timing, could be in the Boston QZ, Jackson, or anyplace else you like post-Outbreak. (AO3).

With love to @misscharlielulu for her support! Have been in love with Joel ever since I played the game, and Pedro's portrayal is just so...inspiring.

You hear the sound of the shower running as soon as you open the door of your apartment.

“It’s just me,” you call out, but there’s no answer.

Closing the door gently behind you, you survey the room. There’s a line of discarded, dusty clothes on the floor leading in the direction of the bathroom, like a breadcrumb trail pointing you towards Joel. There’s no booze out that you can see, but you’re not sure if that’s a good sign or bad.

Shedding your own clothes, you tiptoe towards the bathroom. You had come home as soon as you heard. Mel had come to find you, to warn you. She’d barely finished before you’d started hurrying down the street, a need to see Joel yourself blooming in the pit of your stomach. The sounds of life coming from the bathroom are a small comfort; he’s here.

He’s alive.

You ease open the door of the bathroom, wincing when it creaks. If Joel heard, he doesn’t react. All you hear is the sound of the falling water.

Through the fogged-up glass, you can see the outline of Joel. He’s not moving; instead, he’s just standing under the water and letting it wash over him. Slipping your underwear off, you open the glass door and step into the shower with him.

The water is lukewarm, and you shiver as you close yourself into the stall. Joel doesn’t move; you think he grunts in acknowledgement, but you can barely hear it over the shower spray. Even now, you can’t help but admire him. The broad shoulders, the bronze skin littered with scars and fresh bruises, the salt and pepper hair rendered darker by the water. It’s the end of the world, but Joel still has a strange, rugged beauty to him that draws you inexorably toward him.

Carefully, like you’re trying not to spook a wild animal, you rest your palm between Joel’s shoulder blades. Your thumb tentatively strokes the skin, and even with your light touch, you can feel the tension he holds there.

“Mel told me what happened.” Not even a grunt this time. But he doesn’t pull away from you, so you step closer. Joel is stiff in front of you, his broad back unyielding. He doesn’t accept tenderness easily, but he’s here for a reason. He came to your place instead of his own, came to you instead of hiding himself away with whatever moonshine or pills he could get his hands on.

Still moving cautiously, you wrap your arms around Joel’s chest, hugging him from behind. After a long pause, he shifts his arms to give you room to do so, and you feel the sigh rumble through his chest as you rest your cheek against the broad expanse of his back.

Mel had told you what details she could. A run outside the walls gone awry, an Infected child that Joel had been forced to dispatch with his knife. Close quarters, close enough to see what the little girl might have looked like before the fungus had begun to ravage her features.

You have no idea how long the two of you stand in silence like that, moulded against his rigid body. Eventually one of his large hands comes up to press yours against his chest, and you relish the thrum of his heartbeat beneath your fingertips. Hearing that a run had gone bad, you had feared the worst.

He doesn’t need to tell you; you know what’s on his mind right now. And you know that nothing you can say will make him feel better.

The two of you stay there long enough for the water to turn from lukewarm to freezing, and the spray eventually becomes a trickle. You slip one of your hands out from beneath Joel’s and grope blindly for the tap to turn it off. Standing in the stall, dripping wet, the cold of the room is biting. A shiver runs through you, and for the first time, Joel turns his head to look back at you.

“C’mere,” he grumbles, sliding the shower door open so he can reach for the towel hanging just outside. He wraps the threadbare cotton around your shoulders, using his grip on the fabric to pull you close again. Face to face like this, you can smell the hint of alcohol on his breath, and you wonder if he has a flask stashed in his pack.

“What do you need?” It comes out as a whisper, as you’re suddenly acutely aware of Joel’s naked body pressed against your own. His jaw tightens, but he doesn’t answer. He doesn’t really need to. This isn’t the first time he’s sought you out after a rough day or a worse night, seeking out a different kind of oblivion that opiates or alcohol can provide. He uses his grip on the towel around your shoulders to lead you as he walks back into the bathroom, moving slowly to avoid slipping on the damp floor.

“Sweetheart,” he breathes, reaching blindly for the doorknob behind him. You stretch up and press a kiss to the hinge of his jaw, his stubble prickly against your lips. The door swings open and the two of you stumble back through it together, muscle memory carrying you towards the bed.

Joel grunts when he bumps up against the edge of the mattress and sits down so abruptly that you almost topple onto him. His large hands find your hips and squeeze as he tugs you down onto his lap. God, but you love his hands. Warm and strong and big, just like him.The towel slips to the floor, abandoned, as you follow Joel’s grip to straddle him.

His fat cockhead bumps against your stomach as you settle over him, the feeling making you choke on your own breath. Your hands anchor themselves on his broad shoulders, fingertips skipping across his skin to avoid the worst of his bruises.

One of Joel’s palms cups the back of your head, tilting your face down so he can kiss you. There’s little technique to it as he licks greedily into your mouth, his stubble scraping your skin and his hands roaming down your back. He wants you close, so close that it leaves no room for him to think about anything else.

You’re happy to oblige him.

“Joel,” you sigh against his lips. His cock is pressed between your bodies and when you flick your hips, the hard length of it drags exquisitely against your clit. “Joel, can I?” You drop one of your hands down to wrap around him, and he hisses through his teeth.

“Fuck, yes, want you to take it-” he chokes out, throwing his head back as you line the blunt tip up with your entrance and slowly start to sink down. His hands clutch at your backside, fingertips digging almost painfully into your flesh. No matter how wet you are, or how often you do this, taking Joel is always a stretch. A low groan tears its way out of Joel’s throat as your walls flutter around him, struggling to accommodate his thick cock.

By the time he’s fully sheathed within you, excess slick is smeared halfway down your thighs and Joel’s grip on your ass has turned bruising.

“That’s it baby, good girl,” he murmurs, ghosting kisses across your closed eyelids. “Always so fucking tight.” His hand tugs at your hair, baring your throat to him and allowing him to lick a line from your collarbone to your jaw. Between the fullness of him inside you, the warm drag of his tongue, the pull at your scalp - it’s too much. You can barely breathe.

He keeps a hand tangled in your hair as you slowly roll your hips, his mouth roaming greedily over your neck. He’s no help at all, leaving you to fuck yourself on his cock while he marks up your throat. Your thighs quiver with the effort, your hands clutching tighter at his shoulders as you start to ride him.

That familiar heat is already building low in your belly, every nip at your neck and press of Joel’s cock inside you stoking it higher. His teeth drag against your pulse point and you wail, a plaintive sound that you swear makes Joel’s cock twitch inside you.

“Marking your territory?” You ask breathlessly, gripping tighter onto his shoulders.

“You like it,” he replies, breath hot against your neck. “Can feel that pretty pussy get even tighter when I do this.” His teeth find the delicate skin again and you can’t even deny it, a loud moan tearing out of you instead of a comeback.

“Jesus Joel,” you pant, moving faster on top of him. His free hand shifts to your waist, holding you tight as he starts to meet your thrusts with his own. The added force drives him impossibly deeper inside you, so far that it makes your eyes roll back in your skull. You’re so close, agonisingly close, and you slip a hand down between your bodies to find your clit.

It only takes a few presses of your fingers against that tiny bundle of nerves before you come, all that tension in your core snapping at once and sending warmth blazing through your body. You’re only vaguely aware that you’re chanting Joel’s name, your mind half-gone with the force of your orgasm.

He doesn’t stop or slow down; instead of allowing you a moment of respite Joel plants his feet on the floor and fucks up into you harder. Even when you sag against him, your breath coming in ragged gasps, he keeps up the hard pace. By some miracle you pull yourself upright again, your heartbeat roaring in your ears as you try to remember how to breathe.

Both of his hands settle on your hips, his palms searing against your skin as he helps you ride him. Your skin feels too small for your body, your nerve endings flayed open and raw as that tension starts to coil tighter again. A thin sheen of sweat covers you both, your hands slipping across his shoulders until you sink your nails in for purchase. It makes Joel groan, his hips jerking off-rhythm at the sensation.

“Fuck, baby, that’s it-” he manages, his breath coming harder as he gets closer to his own climax. “Always make me feel better.” You’re barely doing anything at this point; he uses his grip on your waist to keep you bouncing on his cock, meeting his every thrust. Your nails scrabble against his shoulders, doubtless leaving scratches, and you feel the loud groan vibrate through Joel’s chest as it escapes him. All of your muscles are locking down again, a second orgasm racing towards you as Joel manhandles you.

His thrusts are becoming increasingly sloppy and erratic, and you dig your nails harder into his skin.

“Don’t-” you sob, “don’t you dare, ‘m so close, Joel please-” You screw your eyes closed against the onslaught of pleasure, desperate to come before he does. It’s his turn to drop a hand between the two of you, and your spine arches at the first brush of his thumb against your folds.

“Good girl, good girl, fuck,” Joel manages, his thumb working fast at your clit. Everything in your body pulls down towards your core, locking down as he sends you hurtling over the edge again. Your vision whites out and your mind goes blank, everything in you focused on the scorching pleasure ripping through your body.

“Ohfuck,” Joel grunts, pulling out of you so quickly that you whine and coming all over your abdomen. You’re barely aware of it even as his warm come spatters across your skin. Instead you fall forwards, sagging against Joel and resting your forehead on his shoulder. Both of you are breathing hard, content to stay silent until you come back to yourselves.

The first thing you really become aware of, other than the press of Joel’s body against yours, is his rapidly cooling come on your abdomen. Wrinkling your nose, you look around for something you can use to wipe it off, climbing off Joel’s lap with great difficulty to grab a rag on the windowsill.

Your legs feel weak beneath you, and as soon as you’re done, you collapse back into the bed. Joel let himself fall backwards, his head near your thigh and his hair tickling your skin as he turns to look at you.

“You okay?” He asks after a long moment. He might not be given over much to tenderness, but you know he worries about hurting you.

“I’m fine.” You stifle a giggle. “I’ll feel it tomorrow, but I’m honestly more pissed you used all my hot water, and then made a mess of me.” There’s a low chuckle from the other end of the bed.

“How about I promise to make it up to you?”

#joel miller x reader #the last of us #joel miller fanfiction

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moonlit-dreamers · 5 months

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*sighs loudly* so i Was going to draw them but turns out my own design is too difficult for me to draw. but i'll be making this post anyway bc this au has been cooking for so long i might as well!

Featherless Flight AU

aka dca avian au where these fucks r BIRDS

(disclaimer this is a sun x moon au. it also deals with heavy themes such as child abuse, death, violence, and. ya know. wutever tws come with the apocalypse (also these will not be talked about in detail in this post))

nothing robotic in them. just feathers, blood, and bones. a lot of that stuff may be lost or break throughout their story! but lemme at least tell u wut they look like (without having my own drawings OTL (i only have a ref for their faces (which im not confident of)))

a quick note for both of their designs, they r both Fully Covered in feathers, including their arms and faces (yes they have arms And wings). the only places that dont have feathers is their lower legs and hands. they have anthropomorphic legs. and their face shape is also similar to a barn owl, as shown here (ignore the lack of mouths, idk wut to give them)

suns design! he has the coloring and general design of a sun conure. hes full of bright reds and yellows, tho the green is replaced with a bit of blue. he has multiple crests around his head that fluff up similar to a cockatiel but theyre in a way that make it look like rays. in the drawing above is wut they look like without their crests raised; that is their default. suns feet r grasping feet which r 2 toes in the front and 2 in the back. sun has high speed wings so aes a lot faster. (if u dont know wut any of this means i recommend u look it up, im a bird nerd) sun is also specifically an omnivore (them having different diets is actually plot relevant)

moons design next. moon is the color of a hyacinth macaw tho his anatomy is closer to an owl. he has one large crest on his head like a cockatoo. its also colorblind! since its anatomy is based mainly off of owls, for moons ability to see at night means he can see less colors. and bc hes more sensitive at night his eyes r always half closed in light, making it look sleepy despite being fully awake. moon has raptor feet with 3 toes in the front and 1 in the back. xis claws r also much larger than suns. moon has passive soaring wings which is better for longer flights. and moon is a carnivore :)

theres also an eclipse but their design is an enigma to me even in my own mind

but back to sun and moon! if anyone is curious moon uses he/it/xe pronouns while sun uses he/it/ae pronouns. they r both aroace and love each other deeply (qpr babyyyyy). sun is genderfluid while moon doesnt give a shit (agender).

sun is more bubbly and energetic. very much high energy bouncing off the walls. hes the kind of optimist where u cant tell if their "bright side"s r trying to help or be condescending. its a master at back handed compliments. heavily a perfectionist and will reach the point of screaming fits if wut he doesnt isnt perfect. ae has a lot of self image issues. ae hides a lot of aers lack of self confidence and doubt behind a wall of "im the best", tho that wall can crash very easily. a bit of a flirt, but mainly bc he just enjoys seeing how ppl react. he takes compliments from everyone but moons compliments r always the best

moon is lower energy and calmer. at least, he acts like it. hes more reserved and if it wasnt for sun he wouldnt have any friends or talk to ppl at all. he fears abandonment and sun is the only person who has stayed with him this whole time and is the only person he truly trusts. is very aggressive towards anyone it doesnt know. despite being shorter than sun (hes 6ft while sun is 7ft) it definitely does a good job at intimidating ppl. over time when xe becomes comfortable with someone xe will eventually calm down and show a bit of a softer side to them. when xes actually calm and likes someone xe can be a bit... chaotic :)

im honestly not sure where ill start their story since ive already thought about their childhood but i also wanna write about their adulthood as well. the story of their childhood mainly deals with the abuse they went through, then with adulthood theyre shoved into an apocalypse bc... y not :) (btw the apocalypse is mainly just bc ive been enjoying apocalypse aus a Lot lately and wanna write one. the child abuse is for their development and to show y they act the way they do. while it will be fun to write their development, i am by no means saying abuse is okay and this topic will be treated carefully and seriously.)

oh theyre also nd as Fuck

but yeah. these r my babies! i hope to at some point start writing the fic so i can show it to u all, but im already in the process of writing another fic, which will be coming out soon!

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mrs-snape5984 · 17 days

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„You’re not alone, together we stand. I’ll be by your side, you know, I’ll take your hand…”

“Just stay strong, ‘cause you know, I’m here for you…” (“Keep holding on” by Avril Lavigne)

I decided to set a trigger warning on this post: Miscarriages, high risk pregnancies, ICSI treatments, traumatic wish for a child journey, hysterectomy. So, please feel free to skip the following x paragraphs, if you feel triggered by these topics. Thank you.

Those of you lovely people of Snapedom, who know me and my way of blogging about Severus and my personal hardships might have noticed, that I’m mostly venting about ME/CFS and the crumbs, which are left from my former life. Since I can’t do much about it right now, I decided to “fix” another one of my countless issues…an internal wound, which desperately needs to heal!

As some of you might remember, I’m a mother of three wonderful children. There are my eleven years old twins and then there’s my six years old daughter. My pregnancies were the result of a long and painful journey of ICSI treatments, several miscarriages, way too many tears, about ten surgeries - due to Endometriosis and myomas - which eventually ended in a hysterectomy four years ago.

My desperate wish for a child led me to some decisions and life choices, which I probably wouldn’t have made, if I would have been clearer…maybe more stable in my whole mindset. One of these choices was a totally over rushed marriage to a narcissistic man, who made me believe, that he wanted the same. Gosh…I’ve been so desperate and so fucking stupid! Well, at least I got my twins because of him.

I went to the appointment for the transfer of the embryos on my own. He didn’t want to join the procedure��and I should have known, that he was already saying “goodbye” back then.

The pregnancy was rough. I had to lie in bed from the 8th week of pregnancy until they were born as premature babies in the 29th week of pregnancy. The last 4,5 months of pregnancy, I had to stay in the hospital…fighting for my babies’ lives all on my own. The father of them had decided, that he didn’t want to be a father anymore…wow…

I don’t want to go further into details about this phase of my life…at least not yet. I commissioned my friend @alinearthp for this project and asked her for several drawings of the different phases of my journey to become a mother. This artwork will be the start of my healing process…and I’m incredibly grateful, that you’re doing this for me, Aline! I know, that you’ll need time to draw all these wishes of mine, but I’ll be patiently waiting for each of your breathtaking pieces of art, my dear!

So, for the next couple of months, Severus will accompany me on my path through this phase of my past…just like he did back then, when I spent months in a hospital bed in “Trendelenburg” position. During this period of my life - and to be honest, in so many other phases of the past 21 years, as well - I clung to my imagination of Severus in order to feel less helpless and alone. His resilience and determination have always been my inspiration to keep going through all these hardships, which life kept throwing at me. He’s the love of my life…and he will forever be the guiding light in my darkness.

🖤Severus & Julia🖤

🖤Sevy & Jules🖤

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maleyanderecafe · 8 months

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Love, Sam (Game)

Created by: Korean Linguistics Lab

Genre: Horror

This one is a bit of an old game so you might have seen youtubers and other streamers play it, but I haven't until now so that's why this post is here. It is a very good short game about a story of an obsessive yandere where things are not how they seem. I would recommend watching or playing this game before I go in and spoil the entire thing. As a horror game, does include things like jump scares and loud noises so do be warned.

The story is mostly focused inside a single apartment. The player reads through a diary of someone who is trying to let go of their crush, with papers of the diary written inside of them, all with the ending signature, Love, Sam. The entries recount their crush on another student named Brian, a jock at the high school. As the story goes on the player faces various hallucinations of things moving and destroying their house, coming through the windows, lights turning off suddenly all in relation with the various events happening in the diary. Eventually as the story goes on, we come to realize that the character "Sam" is not actually the one who is the player character but rather another named Kyle, who is deeply in love with Brian.

The story of Kyle and Sam are written in parallel with each other so that you mistakenly believe that they are both written by Sam. Kyle's diary starts with him recounting all of the things that he and B do together, going to various places in town and how much he loves him. Between those pages are pages from Sam's diary, about her moving to a new town and trying to make friends, being annoyed by Stacy and Kyle, the mean girl and the mean jock respectively before eventually meeting another jock named Brian. Brian takes a liking to Sam and shows her around town, eventually leading to Sam developing a strong crush on him. Kyle gets jealous and joins Stacy on getting Sam drunk during a party she's attending but Brian is able to save her from it, instead bringing her to a secluded hill area, something that Kyle eventually gets angry for as he believed that it was a special place for just him and Brian. Kyle, extremely bitter of Sam's appearance in their lives proceeds to team up with Stacy to frame Sam, by taking pictures of Brian in various locations to put in Sam's locker, drawing hearts everywhere and writing notes to make it seem like she's a huge stalker. He even has Stacy dredge up Sam's past about her dad who was a pedophile, something that Sam was desperately trying to run away from. At some point though, Stacy starts to see Kyle's obsessive behavior as too much ,even believing that he's doing this to be with Sam. In the end, she ends up telling Brian what Kyle did, leading to Kyle desperately trying to get him back. Full of rage, he blames everything on Sam, and forges a note to have them meet on the hill. Kyle ends up pushing Sam off of it (whether or not on purpose or not) and then burns all of the items she had on her to prevent the police from finding out it was a murder. We also find out that Brian ends up leaving town, much to Kyle's detriment.

There are three endings to the game. One where he refuses to throw away his diary, leading to him staying in the infinite guilt he has, forced to relieve the events of the game over and over again. One where he burns the notebook and proceeds to die in the fire and finally one where he burns the notebook but confesses to the police about the murder, never able to confess to Brian.

Love, Sam does a really good job of fooling the player into thinking that they are actually Sam with the way that the two different diaries parallel each other but there are some giveaways to the fact that they actually are two different people before the ultimate reveal. The easiest is likely the clothes and the general living space as it is (at least from what I can tell in media) a lot more stereotypical of a guy, with the clothes being more masculine. There's also the fact that the two diaries have a different writing styles, with Sam's notes always signing "Love, Sam" at the end along with the fact that she often writes in the third person, and Kyle's diary never mentioning his own name and writing in the first person. Even the fact that the pages are separate from Kyle's diary are a good indication that they aren't from the same writer. Finally, is the nickname that Kyle has for Brian, "B" which Sam never calls him. There are the small details you might find strange if you didn't know what the twist might have been. Even if you do know the twist though, I think it's really interesting seeing how everything does come to play- like what Sam's actual deal is and how the other characters are interacting with it all. The fact that the two different diaries also parallel each other is also very interesting though, as it shows that they actually are not as different as you might think they are, with various actions or events paralleling each other as well.

I'm not really used to playing a lot of horror based games but this one was very fun to play and it does honestly make me want to look more for these games (it's a nice change from visual novels, that's for sure). The way that the player has to mess around with the room while the story goes on really showcases how Kyle is feeling in these different situations, either with the various scares from Sam's death haunting him, to the various events of happiness when he goes to take pictures of Brian that end up used to frame Sam, though still set in the showcase of horror. It really heightens his obsessive feelings towards Brian and the other characters as it goes on. It's able to use the room that Kyle is in so that you're not always stuck reading, and that you feel more sucked into the game as you go on.

Kyle as a yandere is a character that is someone who is very self deprecating and worships Brian to a strong level. You can tell that it's part of the fact that he's gay (he literally has to hide and come out of the closet multiple times in the game) and the fact that the town seems to be very closed off to anything that's outsider, as exemplified with Sam's journey as she's moved in. To him, there's not really any way out- he's afraid that Brian will reject him and even if that doesn't turn out disastrously, Brian is still attempting to leave town, so Kyle himself will be stuck without anyone he really cares about. He gets extremely jealous when Brian brings Sam around the places that the two hang out (whether it's out of romantic feels or simply because Brian is a nice person is never really explicitly stated) which causes Kyle to get revenge on her. Kyle is just so scared of him finding out that he's basically trapped himself, which is pretty symbolic of the room that we never seem to be able to escape from. There isn't any way out for him, unless he either dies or reveals his guilt- and even in that ending, Kyle likely never sees Brian again much less tells him what his true feelings were. You do feel sympathetic for him as he unravels, eventually leading to the death of Sam, and even he himself seems to be trying to figure out if he can really let go or not. In terms of yandere actions, of course there's the obvious obsessiveness- pretty much his entire diary is about Brian and his feelings towards him, his envy which drives him to stalk and take pictures of Brian, write letters, sabotaging Sam by writing their initials all over school and of course at the end of the game, going to kill her, even if it was possibly by accident. As per usual, I always find games that are done in the yandere's point of view are incredibly interesting because I love seeing the spiral and thought process of the yandere- why they do the things they do, how they justify it, and the kind of obsessive love that they have for their lover. It's always really nice to be able to see those kinds of games.

Overall, I really enjoyed playing this game. As I said for me, it was a nice break from visual novels and the way that the story played out was very engaging and interesting. I hope I get to play different games like this. If you are interested, please try the game out, it is very good.

#Love Sam #male yandere #yandere #yandere boy #recommendations #game #completed

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kociamieta · 6 months

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hi! some questions about your angels!!!

can they wear clothes? do they like wearing clothes?

can they eat & drink? if not, what else do they sustain themselves with (if anything)?

if an angel practices shifting to a particular form for long enough would it put less strain on them to hold that form compared to other ones?

can angels have non-humanoid default forms (aside from the balls of light)?

can they be different colors (aside from the yellow you usually depict them as)? can they change their colors?

what happens when they get injured? can they even be injured?

how are angels born? do they have a lifespan or do they just live forever?

with the angels in water post im very curious as to how they'd fair being submerged in like, lava or oil or something…… but i think that's all i have for right now :) thank you for answering!!

HIII thanks for the angel questions. ..so nutritious

they are able to wear clothes! it’s obviously easiest in a more human-like form, like the angel in that comic i made : ) not many fashion companies out there accommodate for wings haha

most don’t really care for wearing clothes, though. they might choose to do so to have the humans feel more at peace, but it’s not something that comes naturally to them.

they could mimic eating and drinking in a way - by having the matter sort of burn/disintegrate in them, but not a lot of energy can be gained that way (most of the time. angel uranium snacks?). they recharge themselves by feeding on wavelengths, Asimov’s-The-Gods-Themselves-style lol

having a practiced form be easier for the angel sounds like a good idea, honestly! some could specialize in, let’s say, human-like forms, and become the popular angels people paint and tell tales about …

and i don’t see why they shouldn’t have other default forms other than Star and Humanoid! sounds good, i just find the humanoids the most fun to draw: )

they do vary in color! the first ones i drew were warmer in hue, then one was more of a blue-ish white, lots of other variations i didn’t draw yet. the colors might change a bit as they age.

the only way to injure them is to devoid them of so much energy they won’t put themselves back together, this can be prevented by letting them recharge before it’s too late

they’re „born” when enough energy/matter of the right kind combines. and said energy/matter comes from angels that have ceased to exist - scattered out too thinly to be one conscious entity, they’ll eventually come back again in a different configuration, as a new being. do not ask me where the first angels came from, don’t think science has gone that far yet…

final note: please do not attempt to deep fry angels.

#thanks for the questions again^_^#ask #angel

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a-small-writer-in-a-big-world · 5 months

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D&D!141: Classes and Races

I spent way too much time on this and ended up putting too much effort into their character stats.

This is post is about their class, race and any other information that pertains to that. There will be a lot of dnd words, rules, and things that some people might not be familiar with. I will try to explain as best as I can but feel free to ask questions!

Backstories will be posted eventually.

Of course, I have to tag @gold0kapi who has drawn some amazing tiefling!soap that spawned this mess. i loved your drawings very much <3

Captain John Price

Price is a variant human fighter.

Variant humans gain one more prophecy in a skill, get to choose a feat and two of their ability scores increase by one (i haven't rolled their stats). It makes sense for him to be variant human going off of who he is in CoD.

Feat: Alert

You gain a +5 bonus to initiative.

You can’t be surprised while you are conscious.

Other creatures don’t gain advantage on attack rolls against you as a result of being hidden from you.

Background

Variant Noble - Knight: A knighthood is among the lowest noble titles in most societies, but it can be a path to higher status.

Class: Level 10 Fighter

Fighting style: Archery

You gain a +2 bonus to attack rolls you make with ranged weapons.

Second Wind

You have a limited well of stamina that you can draw on to protect yourself from harm. On your turn, you can use a bonus action to regain hit points equal to 1d 10 + your fighter level

Battle Master

To a Battle Master, combat is an academic field, sometimes including subjects beyond battle such as weaponsmithing and calligraphy. Not every fighter absorbs the lessons of history, theory, and artistry that are reflected in the Battle Master archetype, but those who do are well-rounded fighters of great skill and knowledge.

Maneuvers

Commander's strike

Parry

Precision attack

Rally

Riposte

Maneuvering attack

Distracting strike

Evasive footwork

Proficient Skills

Intimidation

Persuasion

Perception

Survival

Insight

History

Languages

Common

Elvish

* A lot of people who play dnd call this boring and generic but I think it fits Price in the grand scheme of things because he's so powerful and influential that he doesn't need to be anything other than human. He is a testament to the human desire to never give up.

Simon Ghost Riley

Ghost is a Fallen Aasimar multiclassed fighter and rouge.

A fallen aasimar is as aasimar who was touched by dark powers as a youth or who turns to evil in early adulthood can become one of the fallen-a group of aasimar whose inner light has been replaced by shadow

Necrotic Shroud:

Starting at 3rd level, you can use your action to unleash the divine energy within yourself, causing your eyes to turn into pools of darkness and two skeletal, ghostly, flightless wings to sprout from your back. The instant you transform, other creatures within 10 feet of you that can see you must each succeed on a Charisma saving throw or become frightened of you until the end of your next turn

Background:

Soldier - War has been your life for as long as you care to remember. You trained as a youth, studied the use of weapons and armor, learned basic survival techniques, including how to stay alive on the battlefield.

Class: Multiclassed fighter and rogue

Level 7 fighter

Fighting style: Archery

You gain a +2 bonus to attack rolls you make with ranged weapons.

Second Wind

You have a limited well of stamina that you can draw on to protect yourself from harm. On your turn, you can use a bonus action to regain hit points equal to 1d 10 + your fighter level

Champion

The archetypal Champion focuses on the development of raw physical power honed to deadly perfection. Those who model themselves on this archetype combine rigorous training with physical excellence to deal devastating blows.

Improved critical

Beginning when you choose this archetype at 3rd level, your weapon attacks score a critical hit on a roll of 19 or 20.

Remarkable Athlete

Starting at 7th level, you can add half your proficiency bonus (round up) to any Strength, Dexterity, or Constitution check you make that doesn’t already use your proficiency bonus. In addition, when you make a running long jump, the distance you can cover increases by a number of feet equal to your Strength modifier

Level 2 rouge

Sneak attack

You know how to strike subtly and exploit a foe’s distraction. Once per turn, you can deal an extra 1d6 damage to one creature you hit with an attack if you have advantage on the attack roll. The attack must use a finesse or a ranged weapon.

Cunning action

Starting at 2nd level, your quick thinking and agility allow you to move and act quickly. You can take a bonus action on each of your turns in combat. This action can be used only to take the Dash, Disengage, or Hide action.

Proficient Skills

Survival

Perception

Stealth

Athletics

Intimidation

Languages

Common

Celestial

Thieves cant

*Note that fallen aasimar do not have to be evil

John Soap MacTavish

Soap is Tiefling Artificer

Tieflings are derived from human bloodlines, and in the broadest possible sense, they still look human. However, their infernal heritage has left a clear imprint on their appearance.

Hellish resistance

You have resistance to fire damage

Hellish rebuke

You point your finger, and the creature that damaged you is momentarily surrounded by hellish flames. The creature must make a Dexterity saving throw. It takes 2d10 fire damage on a failed save, or half as much damage on a successful one.

Darkness

Magical darkness spreads from a point you choose within range to fill a 15-foot-radius sphere for the duration. The darkness spreads around corners. A creature with darkvision can’t see through this darkness, and nonmagical light can’t illuminate it.

Background

Guild artisan - You are a member of an artisan's guild, skilled in a particular field and closely associated with other artisans. You are a well-established part of the mercantile world, freed by talent and wealth from the constraints of a feudal social order. You learned your skills as an apprentice to a master artisan, under the sponsorship of your guild, until you became a master in your own right.

Class: Level 8 artificer

Magical tinkering

You've learned how to invest a spark of magic into mundane objects. To use this ability, you must have thieves' tools or artisan's tools in hand. You then touch a Tiny nonmagical object as an action and give it one of the following magical properties of your choice

Artillerist

An Artillerist specializes in using magic to hurl energy, projectiles, and explosions on a battlefield. This destructive power is valued by armies in the wars on many different worlds

Eldritch canon

You've learned how to create a magical cannon. Using woodcarver's tools or smith's tools, you can take an action to magically create a Small or Tiny eldritch cannon in an unoccupied space on a horizontal surface within 5 feet of you. A Small eldritch cannon occupies its space, and a Tiny one can be held in one hand.

Arcane Firearm

You know how to turn a wand, staff, or rod into an arcane firearm, a conduit for your destructive spells. When you finish a long rest, you can use woodcarver's tools to carve special sigils into a wand, staff, or rod and thereby turn it into your arcane firearm.

Spells

Cantrips

Fire bolt

Thunderclap

1st level spells

cure wounds

faerie fire

absorb elements

feather fall

shield

thunderwave

2nd level spells

heat metal

magic weapon

aid

scorching ray

shatter

*at level 9 he can cast fireball...Price is scared

Proficient Skills

investigation

arcana

insight

persuasion

Languages

common

infernal

celestial

*tieflings can come from a fully human household. The tiefling gene can skip generations before it shows. Tieflings are made because of a pact struck generations ago infused the essence of Asmodeus—overlord of the Nine Hells—into their bloodline. In the players handbook, tieflings are often looked down upon.

Kyle Gaz Garrick

Gaz is an Elf ranger

Elves are a magical people of otherworldly grace, living in the world but not entirely part of it.

Fey Ancestry

You have advantage on saving throws against being charmed, and magic can’t put you to sleep.

Trance

Elves don’t need to sleep. Instead, they meditate deeply, remaining semiconscious, for 4 hours a day

Background

City Watch - You have served the community where you grew up, standing as its first line of defense against crime. You aren't a soldier, directing your gaze outward at possible enemies. Instead, your service to your hometown was to help police its populace, protecting the citizenry from lawbreakers and malefactors of every stripe.

Class: level 8 ranger

Fighting style: Defense

While you are wearing armor, you gain a +1 bonus to AC.

Favored enemy: Undead

Favored terrain: Urban

Horizon Walker

Horizon walkers guard the world against threats that originate from other planes or that seek to ravage the mortal realm with otherworldly magic.

Detect portal

At 3rd level, you gain the ability to magically sense the presence of a planar portal. As an action, you detect the distance and direction to the closest planar portal within 1 mile of you.

Planar warrior

At 3rd level, you learn to draw on the energy of the multiverse to augment your attacks.

As a bonus action, choose one creature you can see within 30 feet of you. The next time you hit that creature on this turn with a weapon attack, all damage dealt by the attack becomes force damage, and the creature takes an extra 1d8 force damage from the attack.

Ethereal step

At 7th level, you learn to step through the Ethereal Plane. As a bonus action on your turn, you can cast the Etherealness spell with this feature, without expending a spell slot, but the spell ends at the end of the current turn.

Spells

Level 1 spells

hunters mark

ensnaring strike

protection from good and evil

2nd level spells

misty step

healing spirit

magic weapon

Proficient Skills

perception

insight

stealth

athletics

Languages

elvish

common

dwarvish

*this also seems pretty generic but I believe it fits him best. He is sort of the hero in the series.

And that's all! I hope you guys like what I've written. Tell me what you guys think because I'm curious!

Tags: @iamcautiouslyoptimistic @argella1300

#modernwarfare2 #modern warefare 2 #call of duty modern warfare #call of duty modern warfare 2 #modern warfare #au #dnd au #dnd!141 #simon ghost riley #call of duty #captain john price #john soap mactavish #kyle gaz garrick

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makeste · 7 months

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BnHA Volume 36 - Reaction Journey Part 2

continuing on our journey following yesterday’s volume 35 post! some more out-of-context random bullet point reactions taken from my reaction posts for each chapter. the full reactions for each chapter will go up eventually once I finish my manga catch-up marathon (currently at chapter 367).

spoiler warning: just fyi, this post will obviously feature spoilers for chapters 350-362, BUT it will also include a couple of stray spoilers from chapter 403 as well, so just a heads up for that if you aren’t fully caught up!

Chapter 351

friends, we are about to embark upon the most dramatic, theatrical, Shakespearean disaster of a fight this series has ever witnessed. brace yourselves

yes Shouto, that’s just cuz he literally doesn’t feel pain and doesn’t care if he lives or dies :’)

IS THIS PART OF THE PLAN??? IS SHOUTO NOT FIGHTING BACK BECAUSE HE’S TOO BUSY CONCENTRATING ON WHATEVER THING HE’S DOING?? BECAUSE IF NOT HOLY SHIT. YOU’RE ALLOWED TO FIGHT BACK SHOUTO

actually come to think of it, he hasn’t attacked once so far. not even the usual giant ice wall opener move. he’s definitely got something up his sleeve. but my god man in the meantime this is hard to watch

sorry Touya, but as justified as your grudge against Enji might be, your grudge against Shouto? not so much. I get it, life handed Shouto the keys to your dream life and he had the audacity to say he didn’t want to drive. but Shouto is allowed to make his own choices, and want his own things. for that matter, so are you. but you’re just stuck. gah. it’s so frustrating and yet the psychology of it is so incredibly compelling

“I might not have the clearest sense of my own identity, but at least I didn’t kill 30 people” fjdsjd gottem

“phosphor” is such a next-level attack name. pretty sure it has more to do with light than fire/heat, but with as white-hot as this attack looks to be, I get it and it definitely works

Chapter 352

love that Kaminari’s instinct when seeing this giant flaming X on Shouto’s chest is to immediately poke it. repeatedly. while Shouto just stands there and vibrates uncomfortably

finally!! a proper half-cold-half-hot ultimate supermove!! though I still don’t quite understand how “making fire that doesn’t actually burn things” is going to help in a battle in any kind of way. BUT I CAN’T WAIT TO BE PROPERLY EDUCATED

he’s thanking Deku. for helping him start to discover his true self all those eons ago. what a sweet sweet boy

omg here it comes ULTIMATE MOVE YESSSS

SLAM DUNK NAME AND VISUAL!!! 10/10!!! HELL FUCKING YEAH WAY TO LIVE UP TO THE HYPE HOLY SHIT

fuck. okay, yeah. if you give me a shounen character reminiscing over his hard-earned personal growth, and feeling profound gratitude toward his friends who helped him get this far, and then you suddenly hit me with the crying little kid panels to remind us of who these two characters really are, at the end of the day, once you strip away all the rest of it. you show me little baby Touya who’s just desperate to be loved and validated and acknowledged. and you show me little baby Shouto who understands his brother’s feelings completely, and doesn’t want to actually be here doing this, but knows that he has to because there’s no one else who can. if you go ahead and show me all of that!! well then!! I mean, good fucking job!! you knew exactly what you were doing!! well done!! you got the tears again so well done to you!! lmao

Chapter 353

okay is every single person here trying to jinx themselves now?? you guys do realize how absurdly lucky you are that Shouto finished his epic battle in the span of only 2 chapters? are you trying to draw more misfortune to yourselves??

“hey guys! great news, Todoroki already finished his fight” fdfklskf Kacchan’s gonna fucking lose it lmao. to say nothing of poor Deku who’s still busy hurtling across the Pacific

WHO IS THIS??!

lol what. he’s wearing a shirt collar and suit jacket as pants. and he’s got weird carpet hair and a disquietingly sexy face. AND FLOWER POWER?? who, is this, and why has it taken us 353 chapters to meet him. OR HER??? GENDER-AMBIGUOUS ON TOP OF EVERYTHING ELSE. YOUR FIGHT BETTER BE COOL AS HELL YOU WEIRDO

how is Spinner actually TWENTY FEET TALL NOW??? like, that earlier panel wasn’t actually a fluke or something, that was actually happening?? you smashed a bridge to pieces?!? somehow you’re a Kaijuu now???

this seriously cannot be it though, especially since Iida didn’t even get to do anything. and I really, really, really fucking hate how nervous it’s making me noooo whyyyy

Chapter 354

there is no possible way anything Endeavor tries here will actually work. he’s giving off so many dead man walking vibes right now and I am not okay

DOES FIRE EVEN WORK ON AFO?? LORD KNOWS IT DOESN’T WORK ON ANYBODY ELSE

Hawks is shouting at him lol. “remember what happened to All Might in Kamino!” for real though! how do they keep falling for it??

oh my god what a sickening realization. to learn that the reason you never found your child was that he was taken. not killed, but taken. that it was never even an accident at all, but deliberate. he was targeted and hurt and taken because of you. and the man responsible for it is standing right here in front of you

YOU HAD SIXTEEN-YEAR-OLDS??? YOU HAD MORE SUPERPOWERED OP SIXTEEN-YEAR-OLDS IN RESERVE THIS ENTIRE TIME???? AND YOU DIDN’T THINK TO USE THEM????

what’s AFO even going to do to them lol. I would love to see AFO stumble around and try to come up with some big intimidating weak-point-attacking speech for Tokoyami “The Darkness Is Where I Make My Home” Fumikage. he would probably love it. just sit there hungrily lapping it all up. “no but please keep telling me more about how tormented my soul is, this is great”

Chapter 355

I can’t believe Jirou and Tokoyami are about to fight god

I love Tokoyami and Hawks’s relationship so, so much. there’s just so much trust between the two of them. like on the surface it might seem like Hawks keeps underestimating Tokoyami every step of the way. but in reality it’s more that Hawks, being a former child soldier himself, is extremely reluctant to subject someone else to that, regardless of whether the circumstances are the same, and regardless of how capable Tokoyami keeps proving himself to be. yet another example of Hawks being continuously forced to walk a razor-thin line between decisions that he can live with, and decisions that will actually keep him alive. Tokoyami is a phenomenally powerful fighter, and his presence here absolutely helps tip the scales in their favor. but it’s also an insanely dangerous place for him to be, and so of course Hawks doesn’t want him here

meanwhile on Tokoyami’s end, he started out simply wanting to prove himself to Hawks, but once Hawks opened up to him, his exasperation almost immediately gave way to admiration and respect. and then he almost lost him at Jakku, and I think that really did a number on him, and so he’s so attached to and protective of him now. and I think that in turn has caused Hawks to try and keep his distance a little more, both because he has no idea how to deal with that emotionally, and because he doesn’t want Toko getting hurt. it’s such a delightfully complex relationship and I want to hold it and protect it with everything I have

AFO IS A BAD BITCH YES, BUT YOU ARE EVEN BADDER JIROU GET HIS ASS

lol he is REALLY cheesed about her showing him up in the previous chapter. definitely took it personally

I’m getting so many Bakugou vibes from this. legit getting chills over here. “shut your stupid mouth already.” she recognized the small dick energy a mile away

DIDN’T EVEN NEED ENDEAVOR AFTER ALL LMAO. THAT’S THE COOL, REFRESHING POWER OF JIROU

Chapter 356

AFO LITERALLY CAN’T EVEN PROCESS WHAT’S HAPPENING RIGHT NOW AND IT’S AMAZING

it’s okay to admit you just suck and are getting your ass whooped by Hawks and the sixteen-year-olds

what are you, a Zelda boss?? so he’s got a fucking phase 2 now?? WHY ARE YOU THE MOST ANNOYING MAN

DON’T DIE ENJI YOU FUCKING LOSER YOUR BOYS NEED CLOSURE AND SO DO I GODDAMMIT

ARE YOU REALLY DOING THIS WITH JUST THE ONE ARM YOU ABSOLUTE LUNATIC

anyways, wow. after getting COMPLETELY AND UTTERLY shown up by newly minted main character Jirou Kyouka, Endeavor got his moment after all. whatever else he may be, he’s a damn good fucking hero. and if anyone deserves to get punched so hard they burst into flames, it’s AFO, so yeah

Chapter 357

what a sassy little birb. like how he now has the sexy soon-to-be scar as well! you are now officially a Todoroki

YOU CAN SHOOT FIRE OUT OF YOUR EYEBALLS NOW?? YOU SHOOT LASERS?? THAT’S JUST A THING THAT YOU DO NOW???

fff Endeavor please don’t die :|!!!!

please zap AFO’s other hand!!! I am getting so freaking anxious right now. he’s either gonna win it all here or else something terrible is about to happen

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK

DID HORIKOSHI KNOW??? WHEN HE WAS DRAWING THIS??? THAT IT WAS ACTUALLY GOING TO BE THE SINGLE WORST THING ANYONE HAS EVER DRAWN!??!?!!

OH MY GOD I SCROLLED DOWN AND IT WASN'T ACTUALLY THE END OF THE CHAPTER AHHHHHH. FOR SOME REASON I JUST ASSUMED IT WAS. POSSIBLY BECAUSE ALL I WANT RIGHT NOW IS TO FLING THIS MANGA AWAY FROM ME AND INCINERATE IT WITH A BLOWTORCH

Chapter 358

did TomurAFO really just slap a huge chunk of the iconic U.A. school building to pieces with his disgusting infinityhands all unceremoniously just like that. is nothing sacred anymore. what are you gonna do next?? kill off the most popular character??

“so anyway here’s 1000 words on why me becoming a despot is actually a good thing” dude just shut up and get back to slapping shit already

KACCHAN WENT TO THE SUPPORT COURSE FOR AN UPGRADE?? AND WE WERE DEPRIVED OF THAT ENTIRE INTERACTION?! YOU’RE TELLING ME THAT KACCHAN HAS MET HATSUME MEI AND IT WAS OFFSCREENED?? I am suing this manga for wasting my life

magnificent. inspired. I can’t believe this child is going to be fucking dead like three chapters from now (˘̩̩̩ε˘̩ƪ)

THE PALPABLE FUCKING CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT!!!

FUCK YEAH KACCHAN MAKE THE BAD MAN GO BOOM

Chapter 359

is this dude actually livestreaming the battle

bitch he’s going toe to toe with the final villain while you’re down in the basement making a Tiktok. you are not the same

HIS FUCKING ARM, FUCK ME. FUCK. FUCK!!

his arm is literal splinters right now and all he cares about is that TomurAFO wasn’t impressed with his new cluster move :’’’’) it’s okay. it’s okay this is fine

this is literally Aizawa’s worst nightmare. greatest fear come to life. one of his students is hurt and in danger and he can’t do anything. Shirakumo all over again. Bakugou is about to die right in front of him and he’s so fucking desperate but he can’t do anything

omg. what a goated fucking chapter. Bakugou angst! Aizawa angst!! Aizawa Being Terrified Over An Imminent Threat to Bakugou’s Safety angst!! and to top it all off, “YOU’RE CLOSER TO MIDORIYA IZUKU THAN ANYONE AND THAT’S WHY I’M ABOUT TO MAKE YOU SUFFER” angst. hoooooooooooly shit

Chapter 360

so he’s literally just. torturing him. just fucking around. wow

WHY IS TOMURAFO JUST CONTINUING TO HAVE ALL THE TIME IN THE WORLD TO KEEP ON DOING THIS. WHERE THE FUCK ARE ALL THE REST OF THE HEROES?? FFS, DEKU’S NOT HERE TO THROW A BACKPACK THIS TIME, WHY DOES EVERYONE ELSE FUCKING SUCK SO HARD AT SAVING HIM?!

Studio Bones is gonna have to utilize some sort of AI program to autogenerate these hand things for all their fight scenes. I feel really sorry for that AI and I just hope that it doesn’t somehow develop sentience and take revenge on us all. it would be within its rights to do so

MIRIOOOOOOOO. ACTUAL BEST CHARACTER IN THE SERIES!!! YOU CAN LAUGH AT KACCHAN’S HERO NAME ALL YOU WANT YOU FUCKING STUD. YOU EARNED IT

why was this man not our vanguard. why, when we lost our trump card in the first ten seconds of the fight, did it not occur to a single person that, WELL HEY, SINCE IT LOOKS LIKE THE DEKU THING MIGHT NOT END UP WORKING OUT. WHAT IF WE JUST, YOU KNOW, MIRIO

welp. if anyone needs me. I’ll be in my room crying over fictional characters

Chapter 361

QUICKLY NOW! WHILE HE’S DISTRACTED REMEMBERING HOW HE USED TO BE CUTE AND NOT-EVIL!!

why do I feel like Mirio also got the strange, fleeting impression that he was talking to someone else other than TomurAFO for a moment there? he looks like he’s WEIRDED OUT AS ALL FUCK, but also genuinely sorry for offending him lol

JEANIST IS STANDING UP AND TRYING TO DISTRACT TOMURAFO TO PROTECT KACCHAN, I AM YET AGAIN AWASH IN FEELINGS

I know I sound like a broken record here but Tamaki, not allowed to die, etc. etc. just so we’re clear Horikoshi. I don’t trust you to remember!!

WHAT THE FUCK DID THEY FEED THIS KID BEFORE THEY WENT INTO BATTLE OMFG!!!!!!!

WHAT A TERRIFYING THING TO BEHOLD. I DON’T SEE HOW THIS IS GOING TO DO FUCKALL AGAINST TOMURAFO NO MATTER HOW EXCITED THEY ARE ABOUT IT, BUT EVEN SO, GODDAMN

Chapter 362

oh my GOD WHY DOES MY HEART ALREADY HURT SO MUCH aaaaugh I’m not going to survive this am I. Kacchan we’ll die together

did he already know?! NOBODY FUCKING TOLD ME HE ALREADY KNEW?? HE KNEW HOW IT WOULD END, AND HE WENT WILLINGLY. THE SACRIFICE PLAY, oh my god, my heart is pieces

Jeanist’s eyes are so wide and he’s using his quirk and telling Katsuki to stop. he knows. what tipped you off. was it the “take care of everyone” while standing up with sudden terrifying purpose even though he’s already half-dead. was it that. it was that wasn’t it

I AM SO NOT FINE RIGHT NOW IT’S UNBELIEVABLE

that’s it. it’s over. Horikoshi’s won. it’s all fucking over we never stood a fucking chance in hell

Kacchan’s face, when he’s not scrunching it up in a glare, or a frown, or grinning like a homicidal maniac, never ceases to just effortlessly slip past every last one of my defenses. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, he just looks so freaking young. like the schoolboy he in fact is. far, far too young to be caught up in a war and facing his own imminent death

seeing him like this now, in his own mental landscape, where he’s free to be himself, and seeing how much of a difference it makes in his demeanor almost immediately, just hits me real fucking hard. he was just way too hard on himself. and he never let himself ask for the autograph because he never felt like he fully earned it, and now it’s too late (or so he thinks), and just. guh

Kacchan dying with that much regret in his heart is not fucking okay and I wanna fight a man about it even though it didn’t even actually wind up happening sob

I love, and hate, that every single other hero there actually did try to stop it. they just weren’t fast enough. god

PUTTING HIS PARENTS THERE WAS A DICK MOVE ON HORIKOSHI’S PART. OH HELLO BAKUFAM HOW ARE YOU, AND BY THE WAY, YOUR CHILD JUST DIED. WHAT A TERRIBLE DAY FOR RAIN

#bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha vol. 36 #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #makeste reads bnha #I thought knowing about everything ahead of time would somehow make 362 easier to bear #it did NOT #not even a little bit

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universitypenguin · 9 months

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Chapter 18 - Part II

The Princess & The Lawyer Chapter XVIII - Part II

Summary: Lloyd is rattled by unexpected news from Elliot that sends him into an emotional spiral and delays his return. Aiden is arrested for a shocking crime and Landon gives a profile of the stalker.

Word Count: 6,670

Masterlist

Warnings: Physical violence, strangulation, attempted drowning. References to stalking, the U.S. military draft process, war and military service, drug addiction, family estrangement, international adoption, murder, and death.

Author’s Note: I apologize for the delay in posting this chapter. I was planning to finish it sooner, but I had a virus of some kind for the past week.

Chapter XVIII - Part II

The engine of the Mercury purred like the big cat it was named after as Lloyd exited I-15 and rolled to a stop at the light. He admired the way the hood gleamed in the afternoon sun.

“You did a great job on the body work,” Lloyd said.

“Thanks,” Elliot replied.

Ahead of them, the light was stubbornly red. Lloyd drummed his fingers on the wheel.

“I was shocked how many people showed up to the funeral,” he said.

“They weren’t there for him, they came for us.”

“I know. Can you believe Mrs. Wilcox stepped foot in a Catholic church? Do you think she’ll have to repent before the Baptists take her back?”

Elliot laughed. “No, they have a new pastor. He’s not as hardline as the old one.”

“Oh, man. I bet she hates that.”

“She stopped going to church for a month when he took over.”

Lloyd tried to imagine Mrs. Wilcox without picturing her going to church three times a week and couldn’t quite fill in the picture. The light turned green and he rolled through the intersection.

“What ticked her off?”

“The new preacher didn’t condemn drinking alcohol.”

“Ah… that makes sense. The no alcohol thing is one of her favorite rules. Did you notice she only played Baptist hymns during the service? I was sure she’d pick a classic for the finale, like ‘Amazing Grace’ but she went with ‘The Gate Ajar.’”

“She’s probably hoping to draw some converts to the Baptist with better music.”

“Hey, if the Baptists can drink now, she’s got a fighting chance.”

Elliot snickered. Lloyd scanned ahead for the turn off to the rehab facility.

“Did you know Uncle Joe served in the Marines? I didn’t.”

“Yeah,” Lloyd said. “I knew he’d been in the corps, but only because I found his draft papers in the basement when I was a kid.”

“Draft papers? He was drafted?”

“His card got pulled in ‘69 and he did two tours. We never talked about it. I knew better than to ask. Eventually, it just sort of faded from my mind because he never brought it up.”

“Isn’t that weird?” Elliot asked.

Lloyd shrugged.

“Do you think that’s why he was… the way he was?”

The way he was. Lloyd contemplated the phrase. How was Joe? The first word that came to mind was quite simply: mean. The stern demeanor, thirst for vengeance, and his desperate need for control might have had roots in his time overseas. Who knew what effect the brutality of guerrilla warfare would’ve had on Joe as an eighteen year old. Lloyd wondered if his father had been in a similar state of mind as he’d found himself in at that age. Perhaps the simmering rage had been hardened into something more deadly by the explosive violence of those two years in the jungle.

“I don’t know. Maybe, but no one can know for sure. Even if it did, Joe wouldn’t have admitted it.”

Lloyd turned in at the rehab facility and parked near the front doors. Elliot checked in with the admissions clerk, who took his luggage and disappeared down the hall, giving them a moment to say goodbye.

“Were you serious about staying in touch?” Elliot asked.

“Yeah. I haven’t decided about the ranch yet, but we’ll need to coordinate on that when the time comes.”

Elliot stared at him. “Coordinate?”

“Joe left you half the ranch.”

“Come again?”

Lloyd clapped his cousin on the shoulder. “I’ll have the lawyer send you a copy of the will, okay? We’re business partners now. That is, unless you’d rather sell.”

Elliot looked dumbstruck. “Uh-huh. Yeah… I don’t know. Do you want to?”

“I haven’t decided. How about we wait six months to make a final determination? It’ll give you time to get back on your feet and I can think things over. But if you need cash now, I can arrange a sale.”

“We should talk about that… later.” Elliot glanced over his shoulder to the desk, where the nurse was working on her computer. “Hang on a second, will you?”

Lloyd watched as Elliot approached the nurse, then accepted a small green notepad and pen. He scribbled something down and ripped off the page before handing it back to her.

“Here. Since you were serious about staying in touch, don’t limit yourself to just me, okay?”

Lloyd looked at the paper. There were two unfamiliar addresses written down, one nearby in Park City and the other in Denver. He looked at Elliot. “What’s this?”

His cousin shoved his hands in his pockets, rolling his shoulders.

“I know you’ve never gotten in contact, which, you know… uh… speaks for itself… but I think you should have that. Just in case you change your mind.”

Lloyd studied the addresses and then Elliot’s anxious expression.

“If you’re still angry-” he broke off, sighing. “You can’t blame them for something that was out of their control.”

“Blame who? For what?” Lloyd asked, losing patience as Elliot skirted around the point without explanation.

“Ingrid and Josephine. They’re your family, too.”

Words died on Lloyd’s tongue, stolen by the impact of the revelation. He re-read the addresses and cemented them into his memory.

“Will you say something?” Elliot said, annoyed.

“I thought they were dead.”

“Dead? Why? You couldn’t find them?” Elliot asked.

Lloyd shook his head, “I never looked… because I thought… I figured…”

“Why would you think they were dead?”

“Joe always settled his debts. Always. If she ran away, that meant…”

He couldn’t finish the thought, but saw understanding flash in Elliot’s eyes.

“They’re alive, and they’d be thrilled to hear from you.”

“Thank you, Elliot.”

They didn’t hug goodbye, just nodded at each other. Then he watched his cousin walk through the double doors that led to a long hallway. Lloyd slid on his sunglasses and headed out to the parking lot. The note in his hand felt as if it weighed a thousand pounds. He shoved the paper into his wallet and climbed behind the wheel in a daze. He didn’t remember the drive from Salt Lake into Wyoming, but the next thing he knew, he was filling up with gas in Rock Springs.

He’d planned to drop off the Mercury in Salt Lake and have it shipped to D.C. Lloyd checked his watch and realized that appointment, as well as his flight, had long passed. There were a dozen missed calls on his phone. He wondered why he’d driven east, when he could’ve headed to Park City and seen Josie just as easily. It wasn’t too late to swing down to Denver and look up Ingrid; the stop wouldn’t be too far out of his way.

What would he say? After all those years of assuming the worst, he'd been wrong. He had to reach out to them and that terrified him.

They’d want to know why he hadn’t contacted them, why he’d let them go so easily, and ignored their existence for the past twenty years. How could he explain that the risk had outweighed the reward? Denial and avoidance and selfishness had cost him the most important people in his life. He cursed himself for it now and saw the stark truth - he’d given up on his sisters without a shred of factual evidence, leaning on emotional reasoning designed and tailored to protect himself.

He couldn’t explain that, not in his current state of mind, so he turned back onto I-80 and headed home.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

You heard footsteps and jerked around so fast you nearly fell off your chair. The unexpected sight of the man behind you stole the breath from your lungs.

“What are you doing here? How did you get in?”

“Easy, Princess. It’s just me.”

Jake raised his arms in mock surrender as you pressed a hand to your racing heart and inhaled through your nose.

“Zach let me in,” he explained.

“Sorry. I’m still on edge from last night. What are you doing here?”

He grimaced. Your pulse, which had just begun to slow, galloped in response to the expression.

“Did something happen with the case? To Lloyd? Is he okay?”

“Nothing happened with the case - as far as I know - and Lloyd… I have no idea. He called me at six-thirty this morning and threatened to rip me apart limb by limb. I’ve been ducking his calls ever since.”

You frowned. “I’m sorry. I tried to tell him about Aiden last night, but I chickened out at the last minute.”

Jake quirked an eyebrow. “Well, that explains the phone call. Come on, Diskant is waiting.”

He led you through the kitchen and dining room, into the living area.

Zach lounged in the ornate Fauteuil chair on the far side of the room, his right ankle hooked over his left knee. The perfect stillness of his posture belied his casual bearing. The frozen, statue-like demeanor made your heart sink, as your attention shifted to the tall man who rose from the couch to greet you.

“Good afternoon,” Diskant said, extending his hand.

You greeted him and settled on the loveseat with Jake, directly across from the sofa.

“I’m sorry to inform you of this, but early this morning, Aiden LeDoux was arrested for attempting to break into your apartment.”

The words hit you like a trap door opening under your feet. You didn’t know if you should celebrate or shudder.

“When? How was he caught?”

Diskant glanced at Jake, who shifted nervously beside you.

“I asked Jake to trail Aiden,” Zach said.

“Starting when?” you asked.

“Saturday morning,” Jake said. “I’ve been following him all weekend.”

Diskant spoke. “He found Aiden trying to pick the lock of your apartment door. Jake contacted building security and took video of the act, so we have clear evidence of the attempted break-in.”

Your arms squeezed around your midsection. “And? Where is he now?”

“Jail, but we expect him to make bail soon.”

“Right.”

Detective Diskant glanced at Jake before meeting your eyes.

“There’s something else… While investigating the break in attempt, Jake located something unusual. We found a hidden camera in the hallway. It was tucked behind the welcome wreath on your across-the-hall neighbor’s door. The camera was pointed at your apartment and was live-streaming to an unknown IP address.”

- - -

For the next two hours you reviewed every detail of your case with Diskant. You seized a throw pillow and hugged it to your torso, digging your fingers into its softness for comfort. The detective’s pen scratched on the page as he scribbled in his journal.

Landon had joined your meeting an hour ago, since his shift tailing Aiden became a moot point when his bail hearing was pushed to Tuesday morning. You felt Landon’s perceptive eyes on you, taking in every detail of your reactions.

“Remind me what initially caused you to suspect Aiden when you realized you were being stalked?” Diskant asked.

“No one else made sense. Aiden was the only person I’d upset recently, and he’d just gone through a stressful event, losing his job.”

Diskant frowned. Zach leaned forward, bracing his elbows on his knees.

“I think we should consider other suspects,” he said.

“What leads you to that conclusion?” Diskant asked.

“Last night, when someone tried to turn us into road kill, Aiden was playing basketball with friends on the other side of town - Jake witnessed it himself. The initial contact from the stalker where he quoted: “Don’t ask who’s there…” that’s a line from Scream, which was released in ’96. In other messages I found more references to horror movies. He quotes Misery and Candyman verbatim in some of the threats. It’s hard to tell if the quotes were deliberate or if the phrases were naturally absorbed into his lexicon. The movies he’s referencing are from the 90s, well before Aiden started watching horror flicks.”

Diskant nodded. You noticed he didn’t take any notes.

Zach sighed and glanced at you, then continued. “The third factor is Aiden’s personality. I made it a point to talk to him a couple times while he was dating Princess. In my opinion, he’s extremely passive aggressive, which isn’t compatible with the increasing level of confrontation we’re seeing from the stalker.”

“What comments did he make that you considered passive aggressive?” Diskant asked.

“He was too good at the art of a backhanded compliment. When I first spoke to him he claimed to appreciate Princess’ independence in one breath and undermined it in the next with, ‘not everyone can handle things on their own, like she tries to.’ There were less specific things too, but overall, he just had a way of taking an innocent sounding statement and giving it a whiff of contempt that set my teeth on edge.”

Diskant clicked his pen and tucked it in his jacket. “I’ve been mulling over the possibility of other suspects myself. The main problem with that theory is the phone call Yvette received last night. Have you considered that Aiden might be working with a partner?”

Zach raised his chin. “Do you have a line on a potential partner?”

“Not yet, but putting together the timeline of last night’s events, Aiden called Yvette before going to the park for his basketball game, prior to the hit-and-run attempt. The phone call where he asked if you were home might have been geared towards finding out the exact opposite. I think it’s just as likely that he was trying to find out if you weren’t at home.”

“If he put up a camera in the hallway and saw that no one was coming and going from your apartment, that might explain him contacting Yvette,” Jake said.

“Once he knew the apartment was unoccupied, he could have sent his partner to distract you with the hit-and-run. We reviewed the security tapes, and it seems that the driver veered away at the last second. I don’t think they were trying to kill you, just frighten and maim.”

You squeezed the pillow tight.

“Landon, have you finished profiling the suspect?” Zach asked.

“Male, 45 to 55, highly intelligent, strategic, with organized behavioral patterns. Some texts seem pre-scripted and sent on a schedule. There are three main patterns of delivery: rapid fire, cluster attacks with intentional pauses, and a steady trickle.”

Diskant nodded. “I noticed the intervals, and the scheduled messages. He probably has a full-time job that keeps him occupied from 9 to 5.”

Landon inclined his head. “Agreed. His writing style shows the marks of higher education, which makes me think he works in a white-collar occupation. It would also explain the need for regular hours. The occasions where he’s made contact - the nephew’s birthday party, in the park on Friday night, and then the incident yesterday - they all occurred in the evening.”

“Consistent with the profile,” Zach said.

“His emotional tone shows that he suppresses enormous amounts of rage. I’m inclined to think he can’t contain it all the time, which would’ve led to court-ordered therapy, probably on a non-voluntary basis.”

“What about the fact that he hasn’t identified himself in the texts?” Zach asked.

“That’s why I’m not ruling Aiden out yet,” Landon said. “The coyness allows him to feign innocence. He’s being secretive and not taking ownership of his actions. That fits Aiden to a tee. Factoring the technological aspect of the hidden camera Jake found in the hallway, there’s a strong possibility Aiden is involved in the stalking even if he isn’t the driving force behind it.”

You swallowed hard, disturbed by the description.

“Does the profile ring any bells?” Jake asked.

You shook your head and plucked at the upholstery of the pillow.

“My questions about the stalker’s identity began from the texts as well,” Diskant said. “These messages don’t read like they’re from a romantically obsessed stalker who’s trying to win back their victim’s affection.”

“The primary motivation behind the messages is clear,” Landon said.

Zach snorted. “Yeah. He’s trying to terrorize her.”

“The person writing the texts is an emotional sadist. They’re motivated by the enjoyment of the hunt and provoking a response.”

Diskant was nodding before Landon finished speaking. “The movie obsession in the subtext of his messages isn’t based around enjoying the adrenaline rush of fear, like a normal person would. He’s identifying with the antagonists, like Ghostface and Patrick Bateman.”

“And our current theory is that Aiden is involved with this person?” you asked, fingers clenching in the pillow’s stuffing.

“It’s one possibility,” Diskant said. “I spoke with Aiden’s father this morning. He mentioned he searched Aiden’s phone for evidence of the messages after you spoke with him. However, after going through his son’s phone, he realized it wasn’t the only device he’d seen Aiden using.”

“What do you mean?”

“Mr. Ledoux reports Aiden has a second phone. He thought it was for work, but he’s seen it several times since Aiden was let go from his employer. His father’s theory is that he wasn’t using his personal device to send the texts.”

Jake leaned in. “Do you have a search warrant for the house yet?”

“We didn’t need one. Mr. LeDoux owns the house, all we needed was his permission. We searched his room from top to bottom and couldn’t find a second phone. A team is searching the rest of the house as we speak.”

“Why is Mr. LeDoux being so cooperative?” Zach asked. “Is it possible he might be Aiden’s partner?”

Your jaw dropped. For a second you were shocked, then horrified. “Mr. LeDoux is too old for the profile and I only met him one time. He has no reason to stalk me!”

Landon spoke. “I went through Aiden’s publicly available writings when I was analyzing the text messages and compared them. Because of his proximity to the case, I also reviewed Mr. LeDoux’s writing and I doubt either of them authored the messages. But given the information Yvette provided us with, I’m still concerned that Aiden has something to do with the harassment.”

“When do you plan to interrogate Aiden?” Zach asked.

“I’m not allowing you to speak with the subject,” Diskant said.

“Why not?” Landon demanded.

“You’re emotionally invested in the case - that’s a recipe for disaster.”

After Diskant left, Zach and Jake headed to the office, while Landon stayed behind as your minder. You retreated to your work station in the conservatory where you stared blankly at your laptop for a few minutes before laying your head down on the desk.

“Are you okay?” Landon’s voice cut through your misery.

You glanced back and saw him standing at the threshold between the kitchen and the conservatory, sunlight glinting off his dark brown hair.

“No. Would you be?”

“Nope.” He crossed to the table and pulled up a chair, swinging it around to straddle as he folded his arms over the backrest. “Tell me where your head’s at.”

“Zach and Lloyd might go into overprotective mode. The minute I realized I was being stalked, I was worried about Lloyd’s reaction. After watching Zach’s response to Diskant’s theory…” you shook your head.

“Zach’s incredibly loyal,” Landon said.

“That’s why I’m worried!”

“Jake and I will handle them, okay? Bishop already suggested locking Lloyd away before we fill him in. We could always shove Zach in too.”

“Got a dungeon?”

Landon snorted. “Not one that will hold them. Listen. This is temporary. The stalking can’t go on forever. It won’t go on forever.”

“If Lloyd and Zach have their way it will be over quickly and violently. The latter part worries me. I want this resolved but I don’t want them going to jail on my behalf. Just thinking about it makes me sick.”

Landon’s lips pursed. “Can you think of any reason, other than stalking you, for Aiden to want access to your apartment while you were away?”

“No. I have no clue.”

“If he planted the camera in the hallway, I’m inclined to think it was placed to make sure you weren’t home. It’s straight out of the intelligence handbook to ensure you’re in and out of a target’s home while they’re gone. Given that Aiden’s father was an FBI agent, he’d know that much about tradecraft.”

You rubbed your temple. “I don’t understand why he’d do this.”

“There were no weapons on him when he was arrested. I don’t buy him as your stalker, but the evidence points to his involvement.”

“It doesn’t make sense. Nothing adds up.”

Landon ran his fingers through his hair, tousling it from its carefully gelled style. “You’re right. And until we get more evidence, it probably won’t. What are you doing in the meantime?”

“Searching for missing persons reports.”

“Okay then. Shall we divide and conquer?”

The next few hours flew by, filled with research and notes. Daylight slipped away but your eyes remained focused on the screen without pause. You pulled up another report and a moment later, elbowed Landon.

“Hey. Look at this. Li Wei Chapman, age 23, vanished in 1999 from Virginia.”

Landon looked over your shoulder. “Her last known location was at a bible camp her family owned in Fredericksburg.”

“Is that too far away from Harmony?”

“It’s only forty minutes by car. The serial killer was most active closer to D.C., but that alone doesn’t exclude this victim. She disappeared on June 14th - right in the middle of his active period.”

“Look at the notes,” you said, scrolling down. “Her daughter, Zoe Chapman, also went missing on the same day. She was two years old.”

“If she was his first victim, he might have chosen a location he knew well. Maybe he spent time at the bible camp and was familiar with the terrain,” Landon said. “Fredericksburg has a lot of wooded areas that could be used for cover.”

“How do you know so much about the geography of Fredericksburg?” you asked.

“It’s on the way to Latimer’s hometown. We use his uncle’s farm for our team reunion every year. This is good. It’s the first mother-daughter abduction we’ve found that matches the details of our victim.”

“Wait. Marco Latimer? He’s from Virginia?”

Landon arched a brow. “Yeah. Why?”

“His accent. I couldn’t quite place it. Where’s he from?”

“Kilmarnock. His accent is Virginia Tidewater, but it’s stronger than most because he grew up on a farm in the middle of nowhere.”

He re-focused his attention on the missing persons report and was about to say something when the doorbell rang. Your head snapped up.

“I’ll get it,” Landon said.

You trailed after him, but stayed out of sight as he opened the door. A woman in her mid-sixties with ash blonde hair worn in a blunt bob waited on the other side.

“Hello, I’m Judy Lange. I’m looking for Lloyd’s house sitter. Is she here?”

“Yeah.”

Landon motioned you forward. Mrs. Lange’s eyes glinted in recognition when she saw you.

“Here are the pool keys, for Mr. Hansen. I apologize for interrupting your evening, but I promised I’d have them back before he returned,” she said, handing them over.

“Thank you, I’ll make sure he gets them.”

“Excellent. And if you need anything, we’re just two doors down.”

You thanked her for the keys and when she was gone, placed the keys in the bowl on the foyer table. Realizing how late it was you checked the time and frowned.

“When does Lloyd’s flight land? Shouldn’t we have picked him up already?”

“He’s driving back,” Landon said.

“What?! All the way across the country?”

“He’s bringing back a car, at least that’s what Zach said.”

Your heart sank. You’d confessed your love, and now Lloyd was taking his sweet time returning.

“What’s wrong?” Landon asked.

“I told Lloyd I loved him last night.”

His eyebrows rose sharply. “Damn. That took guts. Lloyd’s the most emotionally repressed person I’ve ever met.”

You groaned and sank down on the couch, head in your hands.

“What was I thinking?!”

“Maybe your confession wasn’t such a bad thing,” Landon said.

“Why do you say that?”

“Lloyd is skittish about sharing his emotions, but under the right conditions he’s made progress before.”

You rubbed your neck. “I’m worried that he might never say it back. If this relationship keeps going, I’m going to need the words, but I don’t know if Lloyd is capable of saying them… ever.”

“I think the real question here is, how long are you willing to wait to hear him say it?”

“I don’t know. I love him, but I hate the way it feels to be left hanging like this. Either I get over myself and accept his limitations or… we break up.”

“Perhaps there’s a third option,” Landon said.

“What’s the third option?”

“Give it time. Lloyd is capable of changing. Don’t forget that.”

“What am I going to say to him when he comes home?” you asked, running a hand over your hair.

“I’d wait and see if he brings it up on his own. But remember - talking about his feelings is his most underdeveloped skillset. If you don’t remember that, you’re going to be hurt when he fumbles the pass.”

“I can handle fumbling. What I’m worried about is the possibility that he might never try.”

Landon gave you a crooked smile. “Give him a minute to work things out on his own. Lloyd makes his best progress when he can move at his own pace. He’ll test the waters before he dives in. That’s why I think your confession might be a good thing.”

You groaned. “It wasn’t a good thing. I humiliated myself.”

“Or you made him feel secure. Lloyd’s always taking one step forward and two steps back with emotional processing. If he knows where he stands with you, that might serve as an anchor. He’ll never be one for eloquent declarations of love, but a blind man could see how he treats you. I doubt the words will come easy, but he’ll find his voice when he’s ready.”

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

It wouldn’t have been accurate to say that Lloyd spent the rest of the drive across the country chewing on the idea of reconnecting with his sisters. Rather, it was the idea that spent the rest of the drive chewing on him. Thoughts of Ingrid and Josie took center stage and refused to let him look away. By the time he was approaching the outskirts of Rockville, he was exhausted and sick of spinning through the same thoughts over and over.

By the time he parked the Mercury on the tree lined street outside of his townhouse complex, it was approaching midnight, and he felt like a zombie. His back ached and the bruise on his thigh from where Charlene kicked him throbbed. He felt every twinge of sore muscle from the explosion at Holbrook’s stash house as he unloaded his bags. When he stepped inside, the sight of Zach drinking whiskey on his living room sofa took him by surprise. It took a minute before his mind switched on and the details of the conversation on Sunday night came flooding back.

“Shit,” he hissed.

“How was the drive?”

“Miserable. I… stuff came up. I didn’t mean to take so long. How is she?”

Zach shrugged.

“I called Jake this morning, but he hung up on me, twice.” Lloyd crossed the living room and reached for the decanter of whiskey to pour himself a glass.

“Tell me what's going on,” he commanded.

Zach snorted. “Fuck, no. I’m not touching that subject with a ten-foot pole, that’s on Princess. But I’m glad you’re back. Shit’s gotten weird the last few days.”

“Explain.”

“You look like death warmed over, Lloyd. Go get some sleep. I’ll stay through tomorrow and then I’m clearing out so you and Princess can talk.”

He felt like death warmed over, too, which led him to climb the stairs without too much protest. Whatever you needed to share would probably go over better if he had a full night’s sleep before hearing it. Lloyd slipped silently into the bedroom and found you curled up on the far side of the bed. He stripped to his boxers and crawled in next to you.

When the mattress dipped, your lashes fluttered. For a moment, you opened your eyes, but they didn’t focus. He eased closer and you reached out to press a hand to his chest. Lloyd took that as a welcoming sign and closed the distance between you.

He pressed his lips to your forehead and whispered, “I’m home. I missed you.”

You blinked sleepily, trying to wake up, but failing to cast off the chains of slumber.

“Lloyd… home…” you slurred the words as you struggled to open your eyes.

“I’m here now,” he murmured, smoothing a hand down your back. You cuddled into his chest with a breathy sigh that made his heart skip a beat. He kissed your hair.

“I’m sorry it took me so long.”

“S’okay. Glad… you’re back…”

Lloyd smiled, squeezing you gently as the weight of his worries melted away. You were happy to see him and he was holding you again. Everything would work out. Whatever challenge was lurking around the corner could be dealt with in the morning. As long as he could bask in the feeling of holding the woman he loved for the night, he’d meet the trouble head-on tomorrow.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

In the morning, you curled against Lloyd and watched him sleep, enjoying the peaceful expression on his face. You were happy he was home, but dread clawed at the pit of your stomach. The conversation you’d put off was hours away and his reaction loomed large. Sighing, you showered and dressed before making your way downstairs.

Zach was at the stove, stirring a pan of scrambled eggs.

“Morning Princess,” he said, with a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes.

You forced a smile in return and opened a cabinet to grab plates. As Zach finished cooking, you set two places at the breakfast bar. You ate in silence with the approaching conversation weighing heavily on your mind.

“So, have you decided what to say?”

“Kind of. I’m planning on starting with the reasons behind my decision before I tell him the details.”

“If he explodes, don’t take it too personally. He’s been known to say things in the heat of the moment that he doesn’t mean.”

“It’s the uncertainty about the stalker’s identity that I’m worried about explaining. This was bad enough when I thought I knew who was behind it. Not knowing makes it even harder.”

“I’m meeting with Mr. LeDoux this morning. He kept a log of Aiden’s comings and goings for the past week and he’s willing to share it with me.”

“That’s good.”

“We’ll sort this out, okay? As for Lloyd, just bite the bullet and get it over with. He’ll come around once he calms down,” Zach said, and patted your shoulder.

You tried to take comfort in his words when your phone rang, interrupting your thoughts. Annabeth’s name popped up on the caller ID. You answered on speaker phone.

“Hey Annabeth. I’m here with Zach Hightower. Did you find something?”

“I have good news: you were right. The unidentified victim isn’t Julia’s sister!”

“Really? What did you find out?”

“There was an error in the initial comparison, which probably came about because of insufficient reference material. Julia came from a semi-isolated community that’s lived on an island for generations, her DNA is harder to interpret. With a deeper analysis, it became clear that Julia and the unknown victim weren’t sisters - they’re actually third cousins.”

“So the error was on Julia’s sample?”

“It can be difficult to interpret the genetics of a person with Julia’s background,” Annabeth said. “While China recognizes the Miao as an official minority, there's limited representation of her ethnicity in genetic databases, which is why the crime lab made a mistake.”

“Do you have a match on the unknown victim?” you asked.

“Based on ancestry DNA, the unknown victim is Li Wei Chapman. She was adopted by Frida and Lyle Chapman from Taiwan in 1977 and lived in Fredericksburg, Virginia.”

“Thank you so much, Annabeth. This is a tremendous help.”

“Glad I could assist. I’ve emailed you the full genetic analysis, but it might take a minute to download. The file is huge.”

“I can drop it off this afternoon,” Zach said.

You downloaded and printed the reports for him, but once he was gone, the anxiety returned. To occupy yourself, you returned to the missing persons reports, pulling up everything on Li Wei Chapman. The breakthrough opened up a whole new realm of possibilities - you hardly knew where to begin. An hour ticked by and you were struggling to focus. Lloyd was still asleep. You felt trapped within the four walls of the house.

It was too quiet. You were bubbling with energy as your mind raced with thoughts of what to say when Lloyd woke up and the possibilities for the investigation now that the unknown victim was identified. You tried to busy yourself by cleaning the kitchen and re-organizing your paperwork, but anxiety was gnawing a hole in your stomach and the attempts to stay occupied only amplified the restlessness. As you paced around the house, your eyes landed on the keys to the pool. They were still on the foyer table where you’d put them last night.

Weighing the risk, you decided that the pool wasn’t too exposed. It was in a fenced enclosure behind the townhouses, which meant there’d be a row of three story tall brick buildings and a courtyard with an eight foot high wall between you and the nearest street. Locked gates prevented visitors from entering the recreational area behind the townhouses except by passing through a home. Plus, Lloyd’s back gate was only ten feet away from the pool enclosure.

You found your regular one-piece suit in the front pocket of your suitcase, which you’d stored in Lloyd’s laundry room. After changing, you took the keys and made your way through the backyard, closing the wrought iron gate behind you, and dove into the glistening blue water of the lap pool. The coolness enveloped you, washing away the smothering anxiety that had been simmering all morning. With each stroke down the length of the pool, you felt the stress falling away.

- - -

Hidden in the shadows, a figure watched you splash through the water.

He’d spent all weekend figuring out where you’d disappeared to. Finding you and Zach at the Emerald Harp on Sunday night had been an incredible stroke of luck. Since then, he’d been waiting for the ex-SEAL to leave so he could approach you alone. His heart pounded with anticipation as he watched, obscured by a neighbor’s arbor. The structure was overflowing with the thriving yellow blossoms of a Carolina Jessamine that offered sufficient cover from the security cameras.

He’d been planning this for months, even before he’d begun messaging you. He’d learned your routines and watched you, waiting for the opportunity to get close enough. Slipping the balaclava over his face he moved through the pool enclosure gate on silent feet, reveling in the rush of being so close to his ultimate goal.

You swam to the end of the pool, your back to him, unaware of the danger you were in. Wanting to prolong the thrill of being invisible, he stayed out of your line of vision as you swam toward the end of the pool. You reached the wall and surfaced with a gasp, treading water for a moment before reaching for the ladder. Unaware of him, you climbed out and collected your towel from a nearby chair. Adrenaline thrummed in his veins, pulsing through every capillary, and sharpening his senses. He bided his time and relied on the crepe soles of shoes to mask the sound of his footsteps as he drew closer.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Lloyd woke up, feeling well-rested and content. Beside him your spot was empty, and the sheets were cool to the touch. He listened but didn’t hear anyone else moving around in the house. A glance at the clock showed it was past ten-thirty. It surprised him to have slept for so long. Usually he didn’t sleep more than six or seven hours in a single stretch. He showered and brushed his teeth before descending the stairs, looking forward to seeing you.

As his foot landed on the bottom step, a blood-curdling scream pierced the air.

Adrenaline surged, and without hesitation, he sprinted to the backyard, where the scream had originated. Another scream guided him towards the pool enclosure. He crossed the yard in four strides and didn’t bother opening the garden gate, just leapt over it and pivoted toward the pool enclosure, nearly losing his footing as the loose gravel shifted under his bare feet.

You were locked in a struggle with a masked figure who had you by the throat. The masked man looked up and saw Lloyd barreling towards him. He threw you down on the concrete and seized a handful of your hair, then shoved your head under the water.

Lloyd charged. He slammed into the assailant and they tumbled across the hot cement, exchanging a barrage of punches and kicks. The masked man was stronger and more competent a fighter than he’d expected. An elbow to the jaw sent Lloyd’s head snapping back, and he cracked the crown of his head on cement. For a second his grip slackened, and the intruder broke free. Lloyd was on his feet in an instant, ready to chase after him, when he saw you unconscious on the ground.

The intruder was already disappearing around the corner into the courtyard. Lloyd knelt and pressed his fingers to your throat, feeling for a pulse. Your skin was ashen and your breathing shallow. Kneeling down, he cradled your head to his chest and stroked your cheek.

“Princess? Wake up… come on, honey…”

You didn’t stir. His hands trembled as he found his phone in the pocket of his chinos and dialed for an ambulance.

- - -

He paced in the waiting area, bubbling with tension as the doctors took their sweet time scanning you in radiology, where he hadn’t been allowed to follow. The door opened, and he spun around.

“What happened?” Zach asked.

“Someone tried to drown her in the swimming pool. I got there just in time.”

“You look like you need a bandaid yourself.”

“I’m fine,” Lloyd said.

“Princess?”

“A concussion for sure, they’re scanning for other injuries now.”

Worry lined Zach’s face. He crossed his arms and before Lloyd could question him further, the waiting room door opened again to admit Jake and Landon.

“What happened?” Jake demanded.

Lloyd gave him the run down and noted that Landon didn’t seem as surprised by the description of events.

“I stopped by your place and spoke to Mrs. Lange,” the dark haired man said. “She gave me a copy of the security tapes from the pool complex. I haven’t had the chance to look at it yet.”

Jake was already pulling out his laptop. They huddled around the screen and watched as the technical specialist reviewed the footage. The assailant had done a good job of avoiding being captured on his way in, but the frames taken after his fight with Lloyd showed clear images of him fleeing through the courtyard.

“Let me try this,” Jake muttered.

His fingers flew over the keys as he applied measurements to various objects in the footage, giving the software a frame of reference. The program calculated and analyzed for a minute as he isolated the figure of the assailant.

Jake read the result and took off his glasses, rubbing the bridge of his nose.

“Shit.”

“What?” Lloyd growled.

“The attacker is only 5 '9, which means Aiden is six inches taller than the man who attacked Princess. It’s possible to make yourself taller, but six inches shorter? There’s no way he’s the assailant. We’ve been looking at the wrong guy all along.”

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Next - Part XIX

Behind the Scenes: Lloyd’s post-chapter reaction

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Masterlist

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

@denisemarieangelina

@before-we-get-started

@buckysteveloki-me

@patzammit

@badassbaker

@meetmeatyourworst

@whiskeytangofoxtrot555

@thiskindahotkindamusic

@jesgisborne

@charmingprinces

@amiets2

@seitmai

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@fangirl-and-doctor-help

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@jesevans

@openup-yourmind

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@here4thefanfics

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@dear-fifi

@crayongirl-linz

@bigcreatorwombatdreamer

#lloyd hansen x reader #lloyd hansen x princess #lloyd x princess #the princess & the lawyer #the princess and the lawyer #series: the princess and the lawyer #lloyd hansen x you #lloyd hansen x y/n #lloyd hansen fanfic #lloyd hansen au #chris evans characters #chris evans character fanfic #the gray man fanfic #lloyd hansen x female reader

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