#terminal can't fucking read disease

[twilightguardian]

Lilith Fairen, Canonseeker, Dishonest Discourse and Fixing RWBY

Preamble

I'm going to preface this by saying I'm not directly part of the RWBY community. You could say I'm a genuine 'hater', or whatever, and that's fine. I'd be considered a legitimate one; though I'll disagree with you about what constitutes hate, as I'll discuss below. Had it been my choice, I'd have only ever interacted with RWBY after a friend showed me the first two volumes and I, an animation student and aspiring novelist, disliked it. I moved on with my life. But circumstances led me to seeking out critical content that soon led me into the Tundra Discord server where I eventually met my boyfriend. I don't interact with RWBY spaces because I don't (didn't?) consider myself a fan, but I do have a morbid fascination with it and all the issues I have with it and how frequent issues crop up. The only time I've ever interacted with broader RWBY fandom directly was when discussing Fixing RWBY on reddit (and that one time where I commented when someone compared RWBY to Digimon Adventure 02. But Digimon is my fandom so I commented as part of my space).

I have had many discussions, mostly negative, but also positive about the show itself and while I never cared to watch further in, I eventually watched V3, and V6-8. V4-5 were skipped due to a migraine one week and group watch party exhaustion the next, respectively, but reviews and criticism videos allowed me to know what goes on in them.

Note that I enjoy critical content as a creative myself, and dabbling in critical content is important for someone learning how to write and create. It's just as important to know why something does not work from a critical perspective to understand why other elements do work while also keeping in mind there is a level of subjectivity. Someone is always going to disagree with you. I lurk the r/RWBYcritics for critical discourse, and occasionally r/RWBY, though the actual discourse there is fewer and far between by comparison, and unless I come across someone mentioning Digimon or FRWBY, I don't comment because I feel it's not my place.

So as you can see, I've been on the outside looking in at aspects of this community and considering where my interests are focused, (Fixing RWBY being an interest) found myself overlooking a clusterfuck of nonsense.

The concept of "Hatedom/HTDM"

I'm old guard. Old fandoms and old engagement from a time when the internet was a wild west and niche anime communities were tiny. The days of geocities and fan shrines and webrings. Never in my life have I come across a fandom that shunned a big chunk of itself, gatekeeping being part of the community and saying that aspect of the fandom wasn't valid. Perhaps I was lucky in that regard, but considering I dabbled in quite a few communities, I doubt it. Digimon Adventure has been around since 1999 and there were a lot of hot-button topics that split the fandom back then. More than 20 years later, you tread these old, rusted buttons and under your feet a sinkhole will open with a warm, bubbling lava plume of strong opinions will greet you as you wake the sleeping beast. But not once was there any sniff of a concept that someone wasn't a 'true' fan because of their opinions and outlooks on the show, and that is just a single example of many.

So to see the RWBY community simmering in barely contained venom over the "critics" is certainly an unwelcome sight to behold, and one that has alarming implications. There has been elements of gatekeeping in all fandoms, sure, but this feels on a new level. To think that it would get so bad that it was even considered to ban an entire related reddit group for having critical opinions is frankly shameful, and yes, I was around for that. Anyone who thought that was correct should feel embarrassed.

This idea that having a negative opinion equals a hateful person is patently absurd. It has been stated time and again that having a negative opinion on something doesn't mean you hate it. There are many different types of people in the world, with different mindsets and different ways of engaging with the things that they enjoy or engage with. Some people do art or fanfiction. Others dissect or criticize. It can be a combination of these things and whether or not the criticism is positive or negative does not negate the passion behind the words. Labelling someone who criticizes the show, even if that is all that they do, a 'hater' or part of the HTDM, comes across as punishment for engaging in fandom in a way you don't approve.

The internet as a whole, and fandom space, doesn't just belong to you and people who think like you. It belongs to everyone who has passion enough to engage with the media they've consumed and there are plenty of options available for those who don't wish to engage with certain methods of fandom discourse and immersion. To dictate who can and cannot participate in the fandom and who is worthy of hate and derision for being an "other" or "outsider" is frankly disgusting. If you think that someone cannot engage in "your" space because you don't like what they have to say, get over yourself and for once in your life, look past your own petulant selfishness. Seriously, we got taught to share space in preschool.

Criticism As Art, Engagement, Growth and Study

Criticism is an invaluable tool in creative spaces, both positive and negative, and there seems to be a growing idea of what constitutes valid criticism or not as simply whether or not it is positive and the thought of that is quite disturbing. You'd think that I wouldn't have to talk about this, but there are quite a number of people who don't fully understand there is more to criticism than being nice and gentle - which can do more harm than good, by the way.

There can be an art to criticism, and there is no one way to criticize something as being the ultimate 'correct' way. Just like there are different art styles, brush stroke techniques, chord progressions, building methods, etc, there are different styles of critique. It's up to the personality of the individual what form that critique manifests and there is no right or wrong way to critique like there is no right or wrong way to paint a painting. But there is something to be said about whether or not the messages you're trying to get across are being understood properly; whether the critiques are in good faith and can be understood to correspond accurately to the work in question, and with that in mind, we can gauge whether or not the criticism is good.

Critique and criticism, whether good or bad, can open up someone to a piece of media they may never have seen or heard before. It is then that they can decide for themselves, as individuals with their own minds and relative free will, whether or not they want to further participate in the consumption of the media being criticized. To get defensive over the idea that negative criticism exists because it influences the sheeple, dimwitted and easily swayed as they may be, is insulting to the intelligence of others, Eren. Individual people can look at a criticism of a work and decide for themselves whether or not the work is something that does not interest them, or is something to look into for themselves and decide whether or not they personally like or dislike it.

On the more creative side, criticism, even - and I'd say especially - negative criticism, is an essential tool to help the growth of the artist. It helps you grow and learn the many mistakes and errors one can have in a piece of media and teach someone to grow past and learn to avoid those pitfalls.

When it comes to criticizing a piece of media like RWBY, some individuals within the RWBY community view the criticism not only as an attack on the quality of the work, but harassment of the writers themselves. This is patently absurd for the simple fact that these men (and woman) are professional writers and criticism goes part and parcel with the job. To show yourself as a professional in the industry you'd want to put your best foot forward, show that you have the skills to write, and be humble enough to take criticism when given and seriously reevaluate your work, no matter how difficult it might be. The concept of 'kill your darlings' applies to beloved concepts and scenes in a story that, while loved, might hinder the story you want to tell. When you are putting something out there, even as a job, the goal should first and foremost be to entertain the audience, and to do that, strive to create the best version of your work that you can. Passion for what you do is such a hard thing to describe, but most can see it when it's there and can point to when it's not.

I don't doubt there are a couple of individuals that do legitimately harass the writers and others directly. We've seen that with other franchises, and individuals like that can be in more than one fandom. But I specify individuals because there is a trend to lump everyone that some people (like Lilith Fairen and Canonseeker) dislike and disagree with as one and the same, as though the 'critics' are a hive mind, and that everyone is connected to every other critic and knows what they do or say.

But dissent allows an honest writer or artist to grow from where they are, a community who strive to help others to make everything better so that the media we consume is better and the artist will be more satisfied and fulfilled. That is the goal. That is what critics strive for, because they can have as much passion for that work as the artist, if not directly for that work itself, then for the desire to see a fellow creative flourish.

Canonseeker's Logical Fallacies

Eren is someone that I consider to be fairly innocent in intent. At least I don't consider him to be outright malicious, unlike Lilith, but the results of his actions in trying to rectify what he considers to be a toxic situation is in fact toxic in and of itself. Eren is someone who views the situation of the critics as being outright harmful, as though fans voicing their dissent is bullying. Fans have no power and very little means to influence the media they're passionate about.

Therefore, when someone criticizes a work, the main audience for their criticisms are other fans, people whom they can engage with and share in their frustrations and worries. There is always a chance that the writer or some creative can see their complaints, but it is a low chance, and often little in the ways of rectifying the situation other than in the future. When Eren criticizes the 'critics' he attacks their character rather than the ideas they present. When called out on it, he never acknowledges his own faults, instead doing a what-aboutism to deflect from himself.

Just because other people are assholes doesn't mean you aren't also a problem. And considering the fact that we can see you being a problem right now, and you haven't named individual people for us to also slap on the wrist, we focus on you as a problem community member. Critics attack ideas and competency, not the writers as individual people (for the most part. If the situation calls for it, then how the writers are seen in the public eye becomes fair game for scrutiny).

He puts Miles Luna and Kerry Shawcross on pedestals, saying that they created RWBY. They did not. Monty is the sole creator and he picked them to fill in the blanks between his fight scenes. Personally I don't envy that situation based on what I've heard and I feel sympathy for that. But being 'hand picked' by Monty doesn't mean anything other than the fact that he was personal friends with these men. That doesn't speak to their skills as writers, as the romantic, lofty wording would suggest, and it doesn't mean anything beyond they happened to be available to do the job. Monty wanted to work with friends, that's all. Rooster Teeth runs on nepotism. Fact of the matter is, RWBY is now owned by a corporation, not an individual person any longer and when owned by a corporation, can be used and abused for whatever the corporations needs. If fans think that corporation shouldn't have the product any longer, then that's their opinion that they are allowed to hold. When they criticize RWBY for being the mess they think it is, they're criticizing Rooster Teeth as a company, its practices, and its willingness to allow or even encourage incompetence within the production through various means, some more terrible than others.

Eren's understanding of Death of the Author is tenuous at best and nonexistent at worst. Barring people's misunderstanding of the concept in question aside... The concept that once a work of media exists out in the public, it is out of the control of the owner how their work gets interpreted is something that Eren struggles with. An author or creator can do their best to convey their ideas to their audience as best as possible, but that doesn't guarantee that someone will see it in that exact way. Whether a member of the audience understands what the author is trying to convey is up to the individual person, and their understanding or lack of understanding is valid to their own experiences. Of course there are dishonest ways of interpreting a piece of work, such as misdiagnosing a theme of a work (especially when the theme is stated) and then saying its bad for poorly handling that theme. The themes should be looked at on their own and judged how well they're done.

Anything else that I could say about the man has already been talked about in a different document by SYTOkun, barely anything of which I am interested in talking about, as I'm currently more interested in the misunderstandings and mistakes that lead to someone who wants positivity in a fandom to become a poster child for anti-positivity.

Lilith Fairen's Dishonest Motives

Lilith is such a curious person, and I've tried to understand her mentality and see where she's coming from and where the misunderstanding starts. The main issue seems to be that she came into the fandom with dishonest motives from the start and has admitted to it. Her motivation for coming into the RWBY community was strictly to bully people whom she had ideological issues with, or people she deemed 'critics'. She was mocking people while having never watched the show herself, something that many people pointed out. She's claimed to have since watched RWBY and still finds no issue with it. I have no reason to disbelieve her and thus will not accuse her of still having never watched the show. But considering her starting point, either likes it more for ideological reasons or likes it to spite the haters. While her enjoyment of RWBY may be genuine, due to this history, it's very difficult for me to see her desire for this show as anything but sociologically political.

Lilith herself is a very caustic individual with a large chip on her shoulder. She has a preference for female-led stories, and ones that don't require the girls/women to have motivations surrounding men. While I think there's nothing wrong with that conceptually, it becomes a problem when viewing certain stories one has little preference for as problematic for not fitting into what she personally prefers. For the most part, women and girls are more motivated by social aspects of life, whether it be friendships or romance, and that's not inherently a bad thing, but Lilith has some issue with it due to said aforementioned chip labelled 'misogyny'.

She throws accusations of misogyny around like it's candy going out of style. Rarely does she back up her accusations with any factual evidence, randomly accusing this, that or the other of being misogynistic as though one should just accept or already knows it as fact when in reality is quite odd. Guns, for example, are considered masculine representations in her eyes, and not gender neutral items that can be used by either gender, and thus unsuitable weapons for magical girls, like in Madoka Magica, to use.

I've never seen Madoka. But I don't think I have to in order to see how silly this concept is. Girls can like guns and that doesn't make them less girly. I've never heard of guns as being a gendered item.

While I also don't necessarily disagree there's issues in anime and female representation, tropes and cliches can be overdone and become outright tired and boring, I believe Lilith takes it a step too far when she starts going after other people for their acceptance or ambivalence toward the things she's personally not a fan of. In attacking something like Madoka or other so-called 'deconstruction' anime, she infantilizes female characters by saying they shouldn't be subject to the same challenges and difficulties male characters often are, because they're women. She also claims anime shows girls as hysterical and overly emotional. As though teenagers - which most anime feature - is a foreign concept to her. Also stuff often gets turned up for drama. It's called fiction and literally all media around the world does this.

She's also a negative, salty, bitter person in general despite her preferences for happy, saccharine and light-hearted stories. It makes me wonder if she seeks out these fluffy tales because she has such a dark mentality that she desperately wants to get away from, but has the delusion that what she likes isn't respected for what it is, or liked. As though Sailor Moon or Pretty Cure aren't incredibly large, successful franchises in Japan. As though Sailor Moon isn't still beloved in the west. People in different countries can have different tastes and expectations outside of the niches of anime lovers who already understand and cherish these properties. That doesn't make them disrespected. Madoka was enjoyed by (some) people who had no concept of magical girls outside of cursory knowledge of watching Sailor Moon as kids and praised it as being the best despite likely never having watched before or since any magical girl anime. And these people are the ones she hates, but conflates all Madoka fans as these individuals.

Because of her perceived notion that magical girls are disrespected and dismissed due to misogyny, her attitude toward her original stories can also be quite cynical at times. Maybe if she took a step out of her self-loathing and victim mentality she would realize that a prospective reader seeing something like this on her blog might be a turn-off.

It's not like there are other factors that contribute to your story's relative obscurity like poor marketing on your part or the fact that superhero novels (which magical girls count as) in general are not very popular. Yes, even ones that feature male leads. You find more success with more visual mediums like comic books, movies and television. Girl. From one author to another... There's more to putting your work out there than simply writing and publishing it.

I'll get to Glints Saga another day, but from a cursory glance (at an old version, mind you) I can already tell that if you had gone to a writing meetup and got the story critiqued and they found little issue with it... you should find a better critique group because they were seriously doing you a disservice.

Gotta wonder if Faye said Monara's name often enough she'd eventually remember it. There's also a lot more wrong here, dialogue-wise and prose-wise. But that's more for a comparison between the old and new version if this section had been cleaned up.

But her bad attitude doesn't end there. She also has spite for anyone else that seems to have more success than her that she knows is 'touchable'. Instead of looking at a piece of inspirational messages by a writer trying to encourage others to keep going, she dismisses the critique because they're popular and it's so easy for them. Because it's not like an artist or writer could be popular because they've worked hard for it and were able to market themselves effectively in order to gain an audience and conduct themselves in a manner that wouldn't turn prospective fans away. No, it's just that they only got lucky. That somehow makes their altruistic encouragement meaningless.

Also notice how she never actually engages in arguments when people call her out on anything. Because she either knows she's full of crap or she wants to appear like a tough beotch on the internet and hide the fact that she has no counter argument and treats childishly typing out her laughter like some cartoon buttmonkey is a rebuttal instead of some obvious attempt at trying to hide her discomfort.

You know, completely missing the point of the original post that said if you create for the main purpose of getting recognition and acknowledgment, then you'll soon hate your writing and become miserable when your expectations aren't met. So the advice was to create regardless of whether or not you get any attention because you love to write, not because you feel owed anything for writing. But if she did that then she'd actually feel good about herself and her work and not bitterly lash out at everything and everyone. It's enough to make one wonder if part of the reason why she goes after critics is because she's jealous many of them do get attention and engagement and the main thing she manages to attract is people calling her out for her shitty behaviour.

By the way, both Lilith and Eren think that people going to their public blogs, where they post things that other people can see is somehow stalking. On a website where the whole point is that your posts will likely travel, especially if you talk about a franchise (even if you don't tag). Or that people responding to them at all is somehow stalking. They want to be able to say any kind of vile garbage about other fans they don't like and not have to face any repercussions for it.

One final thing because I know it's going to bug me...

"Critics" do not compare autistic people to robots. We compare ourselves to robots because when they aren't written to just be humans straight up are neurodivergent. They do not think like neurotypical people and in some ways even like humans do. That is the definition of neurodivergence - thinking and processing in a way that is outside the norm. Allistic people accept this and also headcanon many robots the same way in order to be inclusive. Lilith, if you aren't going to properly understand why people say things in relation to mental health and neurodivergence just stay out of it entirely.

Toxicity of FNDM, RWDE and Anti-RWDE

Here's where I'm going to get a little controversial, because members of all sides have done shitty things. Anti-RWDE is obvious, as they're just a salt tag dedicated to complaining about people who have negative opinions because how dare. But even the side I "agree" with more, I think have said some ridiculous and toxic things. Never mind anons here.

Accusations of "fascist", "white supremacist", "racist", "terf", "transphobic", "homophobic", "sexist", "ableist", basically anything under the sun that is a pejorative you can think of it was probably spewed out of the fingers of some member of RWDE or FNDM/Anti like a child throwing insults on the playground.

You have passions and societal issues that you want to address, and that's perfectly fine and understandable. But to accuse someone of being any flavour of 'ist' or 'phobe' over disagreements on whether a character in a cartoon does this action or interacts with that character in such and such a way muddies the waters, dilutes the impact the word has and even makes it easier for people to casually dismiss accusations and even real life and serious instances of these things due to how low the bar has been set for being labelled as such. You aren't engaging honestly anymore, you're trying to shut someone down by calling them names. Attacking someone or a work for miniscule things they do or say that you interpret as being bad without considering that there might in fact be a different reason why they said that thing is dishonest and harmful.

Hey Lilith, you wanna, maybe, define what an alt-righter is to you? Or are you just going to call out anyone who is right-of-far-left an "alt-righter" so that you can feel good and justified for shitting on someone else for literally no reason other than you had a temper tantrum at the concept that someone is unsatisfied with a cartoon? It's not like you have any evidence that Celtic is an alt-righter or anything you just made that shit up.

I've seen both sides do this, and I'm not calling out specific individuals because I've seen many act this way.

There are even certain people within the fandom who say it's your fault that you're upset with the show because you dared to have expectations that the show didn't meet. As though this is somehow a gotcha, that it's somehow wrong of you to have desires to see something you think is being presented in the show, only for it to fall flat with something you don't think is good in its place. You're a bad person for having an opinion that isn't positive about the cartoon. The show has either somehow done the impossible and achieved perfection or there is no amount of problems with the writing or anything else that can justify you expressing your opinion about it. It's best for you to shut your mouth because it personally inconveniences them.

It's gotten to the point where it's almost impossible to have certain discussions without devolving into a slobbering screaming match, because even the characters aren't saved from the pejoratives and some even attach characters and liking certain characters to certain mentalities and mindsets. If you dare like the wrong character you will be seen as x toxic thing. If you want to discuss a certain character you'll be dismissed as y type of toxic person. You also better watch how you dress your characters in redesigns or else you're z type of bad people because somewhere out there someone may or may not make a connection to a real life group you may or may not have taken a couple of design elements from and that is evil because there are 100728 different negative ways you can portray a marginalized group to the point that it would probably be better to forget those groups exist at all and only keep your fantasy series based on the standard big cultures and that's somehow more progressive despite also being a problem. Always watch your step. Always be ready to be seen as a monster, or fight a monster. Absolute lunacy.

On top of that, it makes you no better than the people you criticize. How hypocritical to call someone out for shitty behaviour, complaining about toxicity in the fandom and turn around and do shitty behaviour yourself.

Don't think I didn't notice when Judgmental Critter calls out Lilith for calling her misogynist for criticizing RWBY, saying that she just hates women, then turns around and casually accuses people who criticize High Guardian Spice (or some things about RWBY) for the exact same thing with no basis. I love Critter's sass, opinions, views and her work in general, become one of my favourite youtubers even. I can't wait for when my boyfriend shows me Madoka so I can watch her magical girl series and other videos. But I don't fail to notice when she blanket statements groups of people because she doesn't/won't understand their arguments.

Honestly there are many examples like this but I wanted to highlight an example from each "side" to emphasize my point and to show that I'm not just pointing to any particular side as being the problematic one. I think the worst example of toxicity has to be in the tags of this one post I found on tumblr ranting about hbomberguy's video. It's actually disturbing.

I was so flabbergasted by the idea that someone could actually say this, not because they disliked what was said, but because a video that didn't praise RWBY existed at all.

Backtracking a little, I wanted to talk about how quick people are to make connections and accuse others in the fandom of being something terrible.

We are pattern-seeking creatures and our pattern recognition is exceptional. But it also produces false positives in the pareidolia effect, the phenomenon where you see things that aren't actually there. The most benign and silly of the pareidolia effect is 'faces in places' and likewise, you can see patterns of behaviour, thought processes and ideologies in conversations out of context to the wider behaviour of the person. This is why I'd studied up on Lilith and Eren before writing this to make sure that there was a noticeable, repeated pattern of behaviour before writing all of this up. Lilith, Eren, and their ilk also suffer from this when it comes to criticism of rewrites that they have particular issues with, and I'll talk more about this in the next section.

There's an example of a man whom I'd had an argument with in a server I moderate for. I hadn't meant to get into an argument with him, more genuinely wanting to get his thoughts on a rewrite-heavy AU-turned-original-story idea of my own, as someone who liked RWBY. I thought I could have a fun, creative conversation, getting insight into how I did handling the characters in an AU setting and what I could do to expand on my interpretations. I find the idea of setting characters in different scenarios while still maintaining their personalities a fun exercise. Instead I was met with defensive vitriol.

I wanted the focus to be friendship between the girls rather than a mishmash of family and romance, which he hated. When asked why, it was because I said I didn't like feeling as though I was being lied to with the premise of the story, which was meant to be about four girls who became friends, and I felt it personally didn't satisfy me in that department. Then we got off on a long argument about lying to your audience, which eventually revealed a sort of sad element to the guy that I was talking to: that basically he felt that he had no right to be upset over anything that happened to him. If he was lied to, he shouldn't be upset at it. Not that he didn't want to be upset, but that he felt he couldn't, and eventually admitted to a deeper underlying issue with self confidence and worth he struggled with that seemed to manifest in being upset when anyone voiced dissenting and negative opinions.

While I think looking on the bright side is all well and good, there's a limit my dude, and trying to explain to him why I felt being lied to was a negative thing that I had the right to be unhappy about was such a foreign concept to him due to not feeling like he should ever be upset when people treat him poorly. Then he accused me of disliking him for liking a show I disliked. The whole exchange left me spiraling

But that interaction was telling, and while I can't apply that to all the members of FNDM who feel threatened by criticism and dissent, eyes can be opened about possibilities into the reasons why they find critical engagement so offensive. On some level, at least for some, it might feel like they get personally attacked because the show they love is picked apart, and in turn, picking them apart. RWBY is fundamental to who they are as people, and if you attack it in any way, you are threatening them, their worth and self-esteem.

What is 'Hate'?

Hate is a strong word, and one that, like all the above pejoratives, is used far too liberally. It's a strong negative emotion of loathing and disgust, and if kept too long can cause negative effects on one's mind and body. It takes some amount of derangement, I feel, to legitimately hate something passionately for a long period of time. Hate is usually such a strong emotion that it is temporary and fades quickly.

There were a lot of people who hated Twilight when it first came out. Those people quickly faded away after their rage subsided and the main people who stuck around on the Twilight 'hate train' were people who disliked it, but thought it was fun to mock rather than outright hate. It was silly, after all! Who wouldn't love making fun of something ridiculous and harmful and boring and dumb. Many critics of Twilight even pointed out aspects of what they liked in the book series, namely the side characters of the latter books. The vampires and werewolves helping the Cullens and the inter-species political struggles were more fascinating and interesting than the teen melodrama forced love triangle going on between Bella, Edward and Jacob. There were many more still who enjoyed Twilight knowing full well how trash it was, acknowledging it for its camp and bad writing but enjoying it for being bad.

Twilight is still criticized to this day, broken down and dissected to see what makes it tick, and why it ended up being as bad as it was. But it's not for hate for the most part, though there is dislike. But mostly if you're going to deep dive, pick apart or rewrite beyond an anger-filled review, that takes a certain level of passion for what you're doing. You see the good inside it and want it to be better. If you're going off youtuber's opinions you do have to be mindful that some of them play up their emotions for entertainment. Youtubers are entertainers, after all, and while those feelings might be genuine, there will be elements of hamming it up. Even positive youtubers do this and there's nothing wrong with that.

It's the same with RWBY and a lot of RWBY criticism. Most people who genuinely hate the show have moved on to bigger and better things. Those who stuck around either do so because they genuinely love it, or hope that it will get better, or at the very least need to see it to the end because it's been a part of their lives for so long.

Hate, ultimately, is a negative experience that can't birth anything creative. Hate does nothing but tear, break down and destroy. It's tearing down someone else directly to fill a void, or to make yourself feel better.

Hate, ultimately, is what many in the Anti-RWDE does to the part of the FNDM they don't like.

Fixing RWBY

Now comes the lengthy part of my post! Fixing RWBY or FRWBY is a project started by Raymond McNeil, as most people likely know, and started as a passion project due to his love for RWBY and his dissatisfaction with elements of how RWBY has been handled. If anyone says that he hates the show, you know that it's in bad faith and they haven't watched his content. He's said multiple times how much he loves the show, he's just frustrated it doesn't live up to the potential he thinks it has.

This section is voicing my rebuttals to larger criticisms of the show by people who admit they don't properly watch and engage with the project and purposefully look for things to pick apart, regardless of if it's true. While there are legitimate criticisms to be had about the project, they are harder to come by as they get drowned out by a flooding of this low brow shit flinging.

Some people think being dissatisfied is wrong, as I've previously mentioned

They, for some reason, think that having expectations for a show is invalid. I've already discussed how terrible that mindset is. But the main recurring criticisms of Fixing RWBY are mainly perpetuated by Eren and Lilith and a handful of their friends, which get spread around to others who think like them. We know Lilith is dishonest because she, by her own admission, skims his content and doesn't properly evaluate it, looking for things to take out of context or at face value to shit on. EngineGear at least has the decency to honestly summarize without comment. So let's go through some of their criticisms, shall we?

Special mention goes out to EngineGear, who had been one of the people throwing around the idea that Raymond kept Fixing RWBY behind a paywall simply because, as a youtuber, he had his discord as a patreon reward. When I calmly explained why his discord had nothing to do with FRWBY, and how his criticism cannot be put against Raymond without also demonizing non-critic youtubers and other artists who get paid for their fan content, he deleted the reddit post from his little saltmine, r/RWBYCynics. I appreciate his honesty in recognizing his mistake and deleting the post.

We're certainly off to a start here. The implication of this post is implying that Celtic Phoenix, and to a larger part his volunteer team - the Sketchy Huntsman - are racist.

Okay, so, there is practically no information about Oscar in terms of background or creation information to confirm anything other than what fairy tale character they could graft onto him. Who knows, there might be some obscure podcast or interview or tweet or however many different methods the writers have used to supplement their poor writing skills. I'm not about to go on a wild goose chase for something that might not even exist. His concept art says he has sunburnt skin. That makes sense, he's a farmer. He's out in the sun all day. So it stands to reason he has a farmer's tan. Even if he doesn't, the guy has my skin tone and I'm not what you would call non-European in origin.

Let's nevermind for a moment that this is incredibly American-centric thinking. This is an ancient relic of the past where we divided ourselves up into Reds, Whites, Blacks, and Yellows (... huh. I... didn't mean to sort them like that;; ) and sometimes Browns. It still has its uses in the modern day, and of course there is just acknowledgment of visual differences, but it should also be acknowledged that the terms are arbitrary descriptors of shades of the same colour (brown). All humans regardless of how much melanin is in your skin, is a shade of brown. Skin can have an underside of red, blue, green, yellow and determine whether their skin looks cold or warm. Europeans can naturally get pretty dark, being born with natural olive skin and there are non-Europeans who can be born with light skin. Europeans (or descent) can run between Type I-IV and non-Europeans can range from Type III-VI. What's more, we don't know anything about the migratory history of Remnant or whether skin types are random like faunus apparently are.

The main RWBY characters have ridiculously translucent, even glowing skin lighter than Type I that no actual human being would have. Blake and Weiss are beyond even anime pale, so someone looks at a character who has realistically coloured 'white' skin and all of a sudden they're poc. There's no problems with headcanoning that. But that's what it is. Your headcanon. And you're accusing Raymond of racism for getting rid of a character you headcanon as being poc. The same goes for Lionheart, who looks to have an (albeit sickly) ashy grey skin tone. Not dark enough to definitively be poc. It's a headcanon that you can choose to have, but should not weaponize to vilify someone you disagree with.

This is gonna be a general onsen post, one that is going to have some overlap with the faunus heat cycles section below. Mistral is meant to have vague connections to Asian culture. Onsen, or bathhouses/hot springs, are a very important part of Asian culture. Not only that, but they were and are also important to the Ancient Greeks, Ancient Romans, Turkish, and many other societies as places of community, healing and relaxation.

From a meta standpoint, an onsen episode, like a beach episode, is easy on the overworked animators to create, and thus become a staple of anime. But they aren't used purely for fanservice.

Fruits Basket used the onsen episode as another way for Momiji to pay back Tohru for the Valentines chocolates, further establishing his bond with her, for the characters in general to bond, another way for Tohru to show how much she thinks of her mother in everything that she does, and as foreshadowing to Ritsu's arrival by meeting his mother, who owned the facility. Ritsu's mother is one of the few zodiac parents who has a good relationship with their child and was able to give Tohru some insight into the family. Plus, another moment of Yuki showing his affection for Tohru and growing desires to see her as happy as she made him.

Outlaw Star's onsen episode is very raunchy to the point where American syndication cut the episode entirely from television. And because of that the American audiences missed out on an incredibly important plot detail. The episode was heavy in many establishing things, generally being wacky, but also an important, unskippable element to the story.

Blue Seed is an anime that I never got to watch, though my old video store had the sequel OVA Blue Seed 2, which featured three episodes. One of those episodes featured an onsen, and a bomb rigged to explode once the water level got too high or low or the timer ran out. It was a thrilling episode featuring a tense plot and showed the cultural differences between the characters and their one (American) gaijin friend.

There are other examples of onsen episodes in anime that aren't just for fanservice, so to suggest that they only exist in this way is absurd. The female members of the Sketchy Huntsmen, particularly the Asian members advocated hard for this scene, practically twisting Raymond's arm to put it in because it was thematically important, and culturally, for the character moments the cast (especially Weiss and Yang) would go through. By ignoring all of the context to what went on in this scene to say it was purely for Raymond to be gross is to wave away the cultural significance of onsen to Asian culture as being reduced to nothing more than stripteases and ignore when characters do have important moments between one another.

Roman also didn't say anything about Weiss being a man. He said she was flat-chested. He thought Ren was a woman because he was beautiful and had a gentle, feminine face and thin physique and justified it by talking about how women are varied. The joke is making fun of Roman for being an unobservant ass, not at Ren for being feminine and certainly not at Weiss. How badly did you not pay attention to this scene to get so offended that you had to make it about you and your expectation to be slighted. Again, pareidolia. Trans people, rest easy. Not every joke involving gender and being seen as the opposite gender is about you specifically or meant to slight you specifically. And I mean this genuinely. If you think that it is, kindly take a chill pill and reduce your ego before you hurt yourself. Your blood pressure will thank you.

Does this screenshot of a Rated T game upset you?

Faunus heat cycles were treated more or less the same as the onsen scene. Subverting the expectation that this sexual concept can only be used for cheap hentai games and anime. Realistically any trope or concept can be used in a more serious story setting, including sexual concepts like heat cycles. There’s no rules that just because something is used often as one thing that it cannot be used serve a different purpose. That’s the beauty of writing. In this case, Raymond used the heat cycles as one of many minuscule differences between the species to further exacerbate racial tensions and drive xenophobia, which would in turn affect the world on a global scale. Wow that kinda sounds like stuff that happens in real life! What a concept!

To those of you weirdos that think heat cycles are gross still, chew on this: Real life humans have evolved the ability to have sex and get pregnant 365 days of the year. If you think about it, our heat cycles never turn off. And the reason why we have periods is presumed to make sure that if we do get pregnant at any time we can attempt to abort a dead foetus before it potentially goes septic and kills us. Fascinating stuff, but that’s not all. Humans might actually have a heat cycle on top of that after all. There are days during the reproductive cycle where women are more receptive to the idea of sex, and finds normally unpleasant bodily odours more pleasant and men are attracted to the odours of women during this time.

Basically this means that women have periods of subtle extra heat that make them more receptive to sex on top of the fact that humans are basically horny all the time. This is something that is a biological fact within human beings and it can influence society of a variety of ways in the wider context of the world, so why is it so far-fetched and disgusting that a faunus would have a more non-primate mammalian estrus?

Now this is a new one. Ilia did turn away from her destructive spiral. Just like in real life that doesn't mean you get off scot free. She got a reduced sentence and some privileges for her help. She’s being rewarded by getting to go out and have fun at the festival and she said she’d rather be in the (presumably) solitude of a jail cell than have to deal with Sun (and his loud, boisterous energy). What’s offensive about that? Also hmm... 3 poc faunus. Well, faunus are all Remnant's version of poc so you can't mean them specifically do you mean... these three?

Those two on the right are looking pretty damn pale to be poc could it be that you're lying, Eren? And maybe that even if it weren't the case it wouldn't matter because it's a legitimate police technique at the very least seen in procedurals on television and are used regardless of the suspects' skin colour? You trying to slither the idea that Raymond is racist because he dares to have something at all happen to a non-white character is rather slimy.

A lot to go over here, so let's get started shall we? First of all, it absolutely tickles me that changing Shay D. Mann into Shiloh would cause Eren to go into such a big tizzy. Like, it's such a small thing and yet it's one of the main complaints they had about V5, which in my opinion means that Raymond was doing something right. Apparently upgrading a character from a tertiary to a secondary position if there's a need for it is blasphemy.

Okay, so let's go over the concept of character hierarchies. Primary Characters (which there is 8), secondary characters (which there are at least 15), and tertiary characters, which outnumber the stars. Honestly these could be broken down further into Main Characters (Ruby, Weiss, Jaune, etc), Primary characters (Nora, Qrow, Oscar, etc), Secondary characters (Raven, Ironwood, Ace-Ops, etc), Tertiary characters (Whitely, Willow, etc) and then Quaternary characters (Henry Marigold, Dust Shop Guy, Background people).

A quaternary character being upgraded to a tertiary character... what a terrible concept. I also don't understand this predilection for playing up the severity of Shay's actions, acting as though he's straight up assaulted her. He was drunk and tried to flirt. When she ignored it, he tried touching her hair. I've had a more eventful night in real life at a bar dealing with drunk guys who didn't mean any harm and one of them stuck his fingers in my mouth (I had on vampire fangs and that blew his drunk mind). He returns, bruised from his punch and worse for the wear with friends and Yang makes him lead her to camp.

He's not a good guy, obviously, and Shiloh is still not a good guy. But he's more human. He has people he cares about and his own set of morals, even if they may be looser than our protagonist's. If you don't think terrible people can't also have people they care about, I don't know what to say. You're mad because a criminal character, along with the rest of his tribe, got nuance beyond 'bandit'. I do not see the problem.

Shiloh is also not married to Raven, Eren. You do know that people can have children out of wedlock, right?

Gotta ask how Vernal was ruined in FRWBY. He says a lot of basically nothing and doesn't explain himself, acting as though his incoherent rambles are meant to be enough.

Oh yeah, Vernal was such a unique character all right with how... there she was. Existing. I'm supposed to be impressed? Ohhh. Ahhh. Her hair is very pixie cut. Such non-feminine (except it totally is Eren you silly), much discount bargain bin Yang outfit. It's not like Raven isn't literally a palette swap of Yang anyway so I don't know why you clowns complain about Lily, who has different features than both her mother and Yang while still being unique and yet sleep on this.

Raven also didn't dismiss Vernal's death in FRWBY. She refused to outwardly express her grief or accept that her poor actions got her daughter killed. That whole scene with her trying to destroy and then hide the relic was her focusing her feelings because she's not a very mature person. Sorry, that bit of character writing might be a bit subtle for those who are used to blunt-force character writing so it's understandable if you don't get it.

Now this is a weird claim. Let's look at it shall we? Zooming in for the visually impaired on Ruby's face, we indeed do see her looking at Roman and she has a very light amount of colour on her. There's also a white shine that was popular about 7 years ago with a lot of artists. You know, the artists that would put what I like to call blushies/sunburns on cheeks, shoulders, breasts and knees all had this style of redness for parts of the body that are naturally darker in places or have redness. Though with some artists the breasts were a weird one, I've always thought. It's not a style I go for in my own work, but I'm not going to care if that's what an artist likes to do.

Also most blushes, even ones by the artist herself go over the nose to differentiate between a blush and healthy cheeks.

But they claim that Roman doesn't have the blushies so the idea that this artist puts them on everything is false! So let's have a look at the Clockwork Reject.

Well, how can you tell he has no blushies when his hair is covering his face?

Could it be...?

Darker discolouration right beneath his eye that lightens up by his nose? It's almost like... a blushie hidden in shadow!

That settles it for anyone still furiously grasping at straws, desperately looking for any tiny little thing they can twist and warp into being something problematic.

Also one final point that these people are implying that Ruby is being shipped with either Roman or Ozpin. As far as I'm aware RubyxOzpin is kind of a popular ship (heck... RubyxOzpinxRoman was featured in a recent fic we read in the Tundra). It's not Rosegarden or Whiterose, but it's still fairly widespread. Why you gotta ship-shame?

So there's this idea going around that rewrites always sideline the heroines of the story (as though canon RWBY doesn't do that already). I can't speak for all rewrites, because I don't follow any except for FRWBY and I'm starting to get into Remnants. So for all I know every single other rewrite out there features Jaune or some other male character as the protagonists instead of RWBY.

Roman effectively replaces Oscar in FRWBY. A criminal who has found himself in unusual circumstances and now has to work with his former adversaries to complete a common goal.

How does this lead to Roman taking centre stage? Beats me. The fact that he... technically does things, unlike Oscar, I guess.

Now, I happen to like Oscar. I think he's a cute little muffin that wound up in a bad situation. But I also don't deny that he's been squandered as a character and as much as I've given Raymond shit for removing Oscar from his place in the plot, I won't deny that at least he's done something with the character he's put in farmboy's place.

Also Ruby being "reduced" to Roman's sidekick is very interesting phrasing by Lilith here. She tries very hard to manipulate language to give the most uncharitable interpretations as possible. The context for the scene is that the characters are being proactive in searching for leads and Roman is going to go check with his sources and connections in Mistral. Ruby goes with him to keep an eye on him.

She's his handler, not his sidekick. There's a difference.

You... ever get the feeling that Eren doesn't actually understand RWBY or it's characters?

Like... I think Ozpin did nothing wrong in V6. Jinn had no right to air out his dirty laundry like that just to show that Salem couldn't be killed. But while he may be supportive, I don't know if necessarily I would call him kind. In some aspects, sure. But Ozpin is meant to be a calculating character, striving to do what he can to hold back Salem at all costs. He is meant to be a morally grey character, not quite as good of a character as Dumbledore, but he does have that theme of leading pigs to the slaughter. Except these 'pigs' signed up for this job and know how dangerous it is unlike Harry until the end so the analogy doesn't quite work for Ozpin. (By the way, notice his contradiction there by saying Dumbledore is made morally grey by making him evil. Those are two distinct concepts, Eren. Maybe you should look up what morally grey is.) But the terrible way the characters treat him and Oscar's body afterwards makes many of us more sympathetic to him than to be against him. He's morally grey, but we don't mind it, and view him as being someone who is still ultimately good.

"They removed another poc character"

Sweetheart... Gretchen has to actually be a character. She's just a name said on the lips of a couple of characters. We don't even get to see anything of her. Summer got the same treatment, but at least she got a gravestone and characters sort of talked about how great she was, attempting to characterize her post mortem but doing it poorly. Eventually she got a cheap palette swap model. We at least were interested in Summer and who she was and how she disappeared even if we might have only cared because Ruby did and she's the main protagonist. Is anyone interested in Gretchen? And I mean truly, genuinely interested in Gretchen to the same degree that we are interested in Ruby? What about Raven? May Marigold? Even Summer? Gretchen is a fridged tool who only exists as justification for Hazel to be a relatively nice guy but still align himself with the villains. She is not, in and of herself, a character. At least with Magnus, we see the shell that Osma resides in and it hits us that this used to be a person. A person who had family who loved him and miss him and that is why Hazel is here. Do we know anything about the body in canon other than he'd once been a farmer?

The concept that an organization has to be single minded in a goal, no matter what it is, or else it is no longer that thing, is funny to me.

No, Eren. The White Fang is still a faunus rights group in FRWBY. It's just that there are people within the organization who have very strong opinions about how to go about achieving their goals and don't mind stepping over their fellows to get to that goal. That's what we call politics.

I don't even know why this is an issue when the White Fang and the racism plotline were not well done in RWBY and that is an undisputed fact that M&K admitted to. There is nothing wrong with trying to bandage that up and adding human elements to behind the scenes stuff - things that M&K themselves tried to implement but were just too inexperienced as writers to be able to pull off. It really shouldn't be that controversial to say that they reached beyond their means with what they wanted to do with RWBY, which is partially why it's such a mess. And I want to emphasize that I don't think they're incapable of pulling it off just because of the colour of their skin. They didn't do their proper research or think about a complicated topic well enough and rushed through it because they didn't know what they were doing as writers. They also admitted to not knowing what they were doing in the writing department for the first several years of the show so it shouldn't be controversial to criticize them as inexperienced writers pushing out a subpar written product.

While we're on the subject...

In a big ol' rant titled "The Problems with Fixing RWBY" you would think there would be a lot more pointing out the problems with FRWBY and not... pointing out the differences between FRWBY and canon. There's no explanation for why these things are an issue. He just presents these as though they speak for themselves, but they don't. And most of his points are like this, by the way. I could be lazy and answer 'why is this a problem?' to most of them. But I'll do the work for Eren since he's so bad at argumentation.

I'm going to assume here that Eren is trying in a very roundabout and sloppy way to accuse Raymond of saying 'the N word' without actually saying it. One of the fans of his project had been the one to suggest 'Critter' as a slur for the faunus, and due to the similarities between the two words, Raymond thought it would be a clear parallel as being the harshest, dirtiest, derogatory term in his version.

Jockey makes sense as a mocking, derogatory euphemism for someone who is for faunus rights and is faunus friendly as someone who might not themselves be. We know what a jockey is so the imagery that invokes speaks for itself. That's how language works and we have non-offensive examples of it in real life of 'white whale' and 'foxy' and 'bought the farm'.

As for the claim that Raymond said there's no racism in America, that's quite the accusation. You better damn well have a link to a sound clip that isn't out of context or else it's best to just forget about the idea of that. Saying that as a throwaway statement to just hang there without any evidence to back it up leads to speculation and witchhunting. I strongly oppose anyone, even you, being accused of anything of the sort without strong evidence to justify it. Innocent until proven guilty.

Moving on to Cardin and Velvet. Again, I don't see what the issue is. As someone who partook in some Dramonie back in the HP days, I enjoy a good story about a racist getting humbled and humiliated by the fact that he falls in love with someone he considers beneath him. Though that isn't the case with Cardin and Velvet.

Cardin's whole arc is that he was a racist and held certain viewpoints and beliefs. Being forced to work with Velvet and spend time with her on a school project, and the lack of evidence to support his biases led Cardin to begrudgingly break out of his racist mindset and come to respect Velvet as a person, and eventually a friend. By the events of the Fall of Beacon, Cardin is no longer racist for the most part and views Velvet as an ally and companion.

Starting from that point, it's no wonder we can see these two growing close and eventually getting into a relationship. It's all in how the ship is handled, not the ship itself. However, it's not confirmed they'll even get together in the first place. Raymond has only talked about his approval of the idea.

If I can go of on a slight tangent for a moment... like, holy shit, Eren really has it out for the concept of smaller bit characters getting any kind of development. As though the very idea of characters being more than cardboard cutouts is a grievous sin. He claims that small bit characters getting any time to flourish at all takes time away from the main cast.

That isn't the problem, nor is that the ultimate problem with canon RWBY. (Like it's so very transparent what these people are trying to do is to criticize Critic Rewrites by saying the exact same things the critics say about RWBY. But the thing is that criticisms of both aren't 1-1 and so instead of engaging with the rewrites in good faith, they just regurgitate argumentative points of critics without understanding why we make these criticisms in the first place as a sort of 'gotcha' to try and shame critics into silence. A sort of 'how do YOU like it' thing. Nevermind the fact that most creators don't read the majority of the criticisms they get online and will never see it and the complaints are mostly for other fans to consume and agree or disagree with. Nevermind that critics are just fans with as much power and influence over the show as everyone else - which is none.

They don't want to see critics as fans because that means they can't build a boogeyman for themselves. It's a bullying tactic, straight up.)

The problem with RWBY's character bloat was that the main girls weren't being handled properly in the first place. People thought that if there were less characters to juggle, then there would be more time to focus on the characters that mattered. But I don't think that would solve the problem, ultimately. We've seen when they cut the cast and they still struggle with properly implementing character stuff. It gets better, for sure, but the problems persist.

Finding a balance between proper arcs for your main cast while sprinkling in quality of life things for your other characters is the goal. Not focusing on your characters doing basically nothing other than having technical screen time and bloating the rest of the time with splotches of cardboard zooming past.

A lot of people are interested in the side characters, Eren. It shouldn't be an issue for them to get a little attention on the side as a treat to the main plot and that should be the goal for RWBY.

The final point to touch on is the injuries the characters sustain. All I can say is... why is this a 'problem'? Yang lost her arm in canon. The presumption was the Fall of Beacon was a situation that was more than the students in training could handle, and many people (presumably) got injured or killed. But all of that is off screen and swept under the rug and forgotten about. It's hard to take seriously as something that is supposed to be the greatest challenge the students ever faced, even more than they can handle when we see no one struggling, no one getting their aura broken and having to fight differently, getting hurt or anything. All of that storytelling happens off screen and that is bad writing. Telling us people got hurt instead of showing us is bad writing. So again, I ask, if it's okay for characters like Yang to get injured, why is it a problem for Velvet, Neptune and Cardin who had been more prominent characters in Fixing?

Eren didn't understand the concept of volunteer work and how that differentiated between being exploited. Many of the artists came out in defense of Raymond on this, so thankfully, I don't think this argument is used anymore. From the look of it, this argument was the only time people who make these arguments tried to be nice to the artists. Now they're just fellow 'haters' who Raymond collected like Pokemon cards to work on his project. And I'd show a screenshot of calling the artists haters, but honestly I'm running low on my picture limit. You'd think there wouldn't be so many 'haters' but when anyone who voices any dissent toward the show can be considered a 'hater', they exist in abundance. The victim mentality knows no limits.

There were other criticisms about art, legitimate ones, and they were sorted out.

"The entire Brunswick Arc ... is now devoted to Roman."

Did Raymond say that? Or are you just pulling shit out of your ass? I've noticed a lot of people make baseless assumptions like this. Like how someone thinks Emerald is going to be killed by Ironwood when FRWBY V8 rolls around. Which is absolutely stupid. You guys comprehend that the point of the project is to stick as close to canon as he can, correct? That is a thing that can be understood by your goopy goblin brains? My goopy goblin brain can get that, so if not, what's your excuse?

Like yes, things are going to be different from canon. But they're not going into wild AU territory.

Changing Ozpin's host to Roman doesn't affect the trajectory of the story because Oscar was a thing in canon. Emerald isn't going to be killed in FRWBY because Emerald is going to be a thing moving forward that he needs to account for. Understood? Okay good.

As for the Brunswick arc, yes, a lot of it probably will focus on Roman. But that doesn't mean he's going to lean RNJRWBY against a wall to collect dust. This is a leap of logic that I can't comprehend, it's as if Eren thinks that scenes and scenarios that last an entire episode can only exist for one character. Maybe that's because that's what canon does.

I already actually ranted about Eren's apparent dislike of the side characters. So I presume that one of his so-called complaints that he says he does have about RWBY, but from my recollection he's never talked about because that is VERBOTEN, is the fact that RWBY has character bloat.

I think this is all that I really wanted to address, so I'll close this out on the, frankly nothingburger criticism that is 'How dare you title your project a thing I don't approve of'.

Some people like to argue that Raymond wouldn't get hate if he just titled it differently. But I hope that I showed you that with how they attack any and all rewrites, including SYTOkun's RWBY Remnants and other, usually unnamed, "Jaune Main" rewrites, that argument holds no water. These people dislike the concept of rewrites entirely and think it's okay to harass and criticize the work not based on how it functions, but for the fact that it exists at all. Ultimately the message is that this fan content is not Approved to be within their holy space.

They call Raymond arrogant for thinking he' better than other fallible human beings simply because they happen to hold jobs working at a company and Raymond does not. As though that is supposed to magically make them better as writers. Fact of the matter is, there are plenty of writers out there who are likely better than MKEK, and their personal credentials of whether or not they worked for Big Company XYZ doesn't matter. At the end of the day, this is opinion. Opinion that you're free to disagree with and it doesn't make anyone arrogant to think their skills are better. He put his money where his mouth is. But also no one is holding a gun to your head to consume fan content that you aren't interested in. If you feel that you have to because it appears on your dash and that just makes you the big mads, then maybe turn off your screen for a while. Read a book. Go for a swim (or don't if you're in the Northern Hemisphere right now it's December. Go skiing). Do something.

Its not arrogant of Raymond to call his work Fixing RWBY. Its merely a statement of intent with the work. If you have a problem with that then you are saying that is a problem with you. No work is perfect, no work is untouchable. There is always going to be something wrong with it and someone will always be unsatisfied and wish something would be different. That is the value we have as individual people.

Ultimately I am not saying they cannot dislike FRWBY. The work can be criticized. But it does need to actually be engaged with properly in order to be criticized. Critics engage with RWBY, but we aren't afforded the same courtesy.

It says a lot about a person who tries to control another fan into how to think, act, speak or consume content within a fandom space. If you want positive content in the fandom, then don't go after other fans with vitriol, and if you have issue with something they create, then look at it from a constructive standpoint and critique it with the desire for it to get changed. If an artist does not accept every single criticism, that is something you have to get over. They have the ultimate decision in the end.

I'm an old. I'm tired. I've said my piece. Thank you for reading my novella-length complaint and goodnight.

#rwby #rwde #lilithfairen #fixing rwby #canonseeker #frwby #fuck it #really long post #long long maaaaaan #terminal can't fucking read disease #celtic phoenix #sytokun #judgmental critter #I'm on a fucking rampage tonight holy shit #i won't hesitate bitch #gonna watch a lot of critters videos after this as apology for that small callout #I've been working on this for 4 days #help #final word count 10700+

[piratefalls]

i really did not expect the kind of response these lists are getting. i just do these for fun, but thank you for interacting with them! as always, if you want to be tagged in future lists, just let me know!

with that said, it's wednesday. welcome back to the shit show.

list one. list two. list three.

everything's growing in our garden by matherine

That night, in the safety of his hotel room on the outskirts of the Olympic Village, Henry couldn’t catch his breath. He coughed and coughed, feeling like he was choking on nothing, but there was a scratching sensation in his throat that he just couldn’t shake – until a single blue petal flew past his lips, landing in the porcelain bowl of the sink. After an hour of painstaking Googling, he learns that it’s a Texas bluebonnet. He also learns what the fact that he’s coughing up petals means – the beginning stages of Hanahaki Disease. Rare, but not unheard of, according to the NHS website he browses in an incognito tab. Common in royal bloodlines (thank you, inbreeding). "Only curable if the afflicted’s love is requited with a declaration," he reads, and slams his laptop closed with a bitter laugh, wet with tears. "A surgical procedure removing the afflicted’s capacity for love may be performed if the love remains unrequited. Otherwise, the condition is terminal." So, then. He has no chance.

he is exactly the poem i wanted to write by metacrisis

There is no Turkey in Alex's room this year, but there is a prince. AKA, Henry spends thanksgiving with Alex after the election and reflects on all of his dreams coming true.

(Im)patience is a Virtue by clottedcreamfudge

"Why don't you want to fuck me?" Henry just about manages to avoid spluttering Earl Grey all over the coffee table, but it's a close thing. Alex is staring at him, looking kind of annoyed. "Excuse me?" He's never refused Alex a thing in his whole adult life. Also, he very much wants to do that, but Alex hasn't said anything and usually Henry can't shut him up; he'd assumed Alex would bring it up when he was ready. Which appears to be now.

Handprints in wet cement by kiwiana

“I like learning about all the things that make you you. Especially the sexy parts,” he adds with a grin, and Henry couldn’t contain the laugh that escapes him if he tried. “As long as they’re not, like, bad memories for you, I want to hear about them.” Or, five things Henry learned during his Oxford Slut Phase that he shared with Alex, and one thing they learned together.

best laid plans by rizcriz

Henry knows. He knows Alex is planning a big, extravagant proposal. He shouldn’t know, but he does. He also knows that the ring tucked within his own pocket was purchased long before Alex ever even considered a proposal. Long before either of them should have ever feasibly even considered such ideas as proposals. Alexander Claremont-Diaz, genius that he is, is blissfully unaware of all of that. -- Or, Henry just really wants to be the one to propose, okay?

Soft Shock, Put a Spring in My Step by Mags (sparklepocalypse)

“What, you don’t remember every instant of our torrid fuckathon?” Alex asks, pulling an exaggeratedly offended face. “I am hurt. If I can remember all your middle names, you should be able to remember that time we were so horned up on our new relationship that we managed like, seven positions in a night.”

you know i love a london boy by coffeecatsme

“A very special friendship bracelet,” Bea corrects, with such a delight in her voice that Henry is immediately suspicious. He grabs the darn thing and twists it around, glittery beads shining under the lights of the room. A phone number, if Henry is counting them right. Despite himself, his heart skips a beat. “From the one and only Alexander Claremont-Diaz.” She grins, bouncing on the balls of her feet—the day she stops playing matchmaker for her brother will surely be a cold day in hell. The sole excitement of her life since she doesn’t do romance. Henry twists the bracelet in his hands, counting the numbers again, and then looks up. “Who?” Or, 5 times Alex and Henry keep their relationship a secret and 1 time they don't.

Burnin' Through the Sky by cricketnationrise

This whole thing is Nora’s fault, actually, and he will hold this against her for the rest of their natural lives. Possibly into the next. His personal life is fine. It’s possible he was whining about not having dated anyone since his last boyfriend, but this event is so clearly not going to fix that problem. Or: Alex wasn’t expecting to meet anyone at speed dating, let alone anyone like Henry.

it's (not) the end of the world as we know it by viciouslyqueer

BREAKING NEWS: SHOOTING AT NYC’S GAY CLUB ‘Ritz Bar and Lounge’. June is saying something. He can’t hear her – or anything else for that matter. It’s like his brain decided to shut down and not comprehend anything in front of him. The only thing he’s aware of is a thought at the back of his mind, hitting him with such force it’s all he can focus on – no matter how much it makes his knees give out under him, how his heart feels like it’s being ripped out of his chest and stabbed repeatedly with a sharp knife, cut into a thousand pieces with no possible repair. Henry is in New York. — Actors Alex Claremont-Diaz and Henry Fox meet on the set of ‘Roses, Wisteria, and Royal Bluebells’, and stay friends after filming is over. When a catastrophe happens that tips Alex's world off its axis, he realizes just how deep his feelings for Henry run.

General Incivility by cmere

"Okay, kids, settle down, we're all friends here," Nora cuts in. "And we haven't discussed where the night is going yet. I'm of the personal opinion that we should offer our British guests the quintessential American coming-of-age experience." Alex's eyes widen in what can only be sheer delight. "What, like beer pong?" June says, nose wrinkling. "No," Alex interjects. "Truth or dare." "You read my mind, Alexander." Nora turns to open the mini-fridge. "What would everyone like to drink?" "Henry and I will take vodka if you've got it," Pez says. Henry narrows his eyes at Pez, trying to communicate his alarm, but Pez simply grins back, feral, licking his top teeth.

the conclusion literally any normal human being would come to by chaa_kiao

My [21M] flatmate [20M] gives me forehead kisses when he thinks I'm asleep. How do I ask him to do it when I'm awake, too? ____ Henry and Alex are roommates quarantined together. Henry takes to Reddit when Alex's behavior gets too confusing for him to sort out on his own. Surely this will have zero impact on their completely platonic relationship, right?

all's well that ends well to end up with you by karish

“Fuck, thank you, you’re a lifesaver, Hen,” he says as he closes the small distance between them and places a faint kiss on Henry’s lips. His lips are soft and Alex melts into it for a second before pulling away. He bumps their noses together for good measure before stepping back and grabbing his bag from the chair. When he turns back to look at Henry, he’s still standing still, his eyes wide and his mouth hanging open. Alex can even see a dark flush starting to spread over his face. It looks cute. Alex wishes he could– Oh. Oh shit. Fucking goddamn shit. He just kissed Henry. Fuck.

no sweeter innocence by extasiswings

"Well. Babe. You've been wanting him to dick you down forever, right?" [Or, the one where Alex does, in fact, finally get what he's been waiting for.]

Heartaches and Cupcakes and Sunshine Boys by everwitch

After a public fight involving a little too much cupcake frosting, romance writer Henry Fox must deal with the obsessive speculation that one of his most despicable characters is based on the very successful model turned photographer Alex Claremont-Diaz. Which couldn't be further from the truth. There's a reason for why Henry's love stories are almost always unrequited, immensely emotional yet devoid of any real hope, and that reason is currently vagueing him in a series of scathing tweets that has Henry's publisher calling a crisis meeting. The solution? Henry must rewrite his upcoming sequel in a way that redeems the character in question completely. The problem? Henry's attempt to get away from it all so he can actually write leads to a direct confrontation with Alex himself. After a series of clandestine kitchen encounters, the two of them end up with a very fragile truce. But can you really find friendship, or maybe even more than years of achingly unrequited yearning, when you don't have the courage to let your disguise fall? How do you really tell the difference between fiction, and the truth?

washing machine heart by pissedofsandwich

This time he cannot escape. It's not like the night at the lake, where he can dodge and blame it on mosquitoes, write a stupid note and flee the country. This time Alex keeps him, and he does not let go.

Powerless by floatingaway4

“Do you know what I’ve had to put up with in the last twelve hours?”  Henry wants to point out that in that same twelve hours he’s had his body sliced open and an organ removed, but this doesn’t seem to be the time. He also got to sleep through his experience, while Alex was very much awake while dealing with Henry’s family. And Henry got the nice drugs, while Alex looks like he could use a drink.

Someday We'll Know If Love Can Move a Mountain by allmylovesatonce

The emails were never leaked, but the Queen has forced Alex and Henry apart. Alex believes they're biding their time until they can be together for real. One day at work, he's forced to confront how wrong he is when Henry's engagement is announced. With both of them miserable and neither wanting the wedding to happen, they grapple with how or if they could even stop it. Or even if they should.

"Exclusive Top" My Non-Virgin Ass by QueenKatelynTheAristocrat

"It all started when Henry and Alex were guest judges on RuPaul’s Drag Race..." Also known as: a queen on Drag Race made a joke about how Alex Claremont-Diaz is clearly an exclusive top, and now the internet can't stop talking about it, and Alex can't stop thinking about it, and maybe he kind of feels like he has something to prove. In which, Alex bottoms for the first time. And the entire thing is a beautiful emotional roller-coaster, just like we'd expect from these two.

wondering if there's anything to say at all by dearestalez

It was Alex, and not a motorcycle that had managed to grow opposable thumbs and open their front door. He was untying the laces of his shoes while David snuffled up against him, eager for pats. It was noticeable and honestly quite concerning when Alex pointedly didn’t pet him and instead tiredly pushed him away.

Body Count Baby! by orestespdf

“Okay,” Henry says eventually. “What do you want to know?” Alex raises an eyebrow. A small smile plays on his lips. “Can I ask you anything?” “Within reason, you hellion.” Alex flops back down and grins, a new vigor running through him. He rubs his hands together, clearly thinking hard. When he finally looks back at Henry, his smile has turned mischievous. “Am I the best you’ve ever had? Like, has anyone been better than me?” ----- Henry and Alex talk about how many people they've been with.

shake the glitter off your clothes by demigodbeautiies

It was meant to be a short thing, a fun trip, tacked onto the end of a frankly dull conference in Nevada. But getting drunk in Vegas has the potential to go very, very wrong, in some pretty unexpected ways.

Seven Years by LolaLand (Lola_di_Penates)

Seven different places, seven different timelines, seven different meetings, seven different Decembers. And still, Alex and Henry find each other in every universe.

my heart in a house (half a planet away) by annesbonny

“I miss you.” It’s the first thing Alex says when Henry answers the phone. He gets a soft huff of laughter in response. He can picture the quirk of his perfect brow, in the dim light of his Kensington bedroom. Alex wants to be there to straighten it out with his thumb, and kiss the growing concern away. 5 times Alex misses Henry, and 1 time he realises he doesn't have to miss him anymore.

All the Old Showstoppers by chamel

“Dunno, kinda looks like you know what you’re doing. Are those macarons?” Alex asks incredulously after a little while, and a moment later Henry sees him start slowly approaching out of the corner of his eye. “I didn’t know princes could bake.” “I’d wager not many of them can,” Henry replies as he works, letting one corner of his mouth tug upward. (In a universe where Alex didn’t go to the royal wedding, three years later Alex and Henry find themselves both competing on an episode of The Great Celebrity Bake Off. Will old hostilities lead to disaster, or is there something else causing all that tension in the tent?)

One Number Away by smc_27

“Hello?” a confused sounding voice on the other end of the line says. It is not Pez. Pez doesn’t answer like that. With the fanfare of “my dearest Hazza” or “my sweet prince” or “you absolutely unforgivable scoundrel.” Only the first of these has any root in truth or accuracy. Also, Pez is not American. “I’m sorry. You’re not…Not Pez. Right. I’m sorry.” OR: Henry dials a wrong number. Alex answers.

Screw Your Courage to the Sticking Place (and forget macbeth is a fucking tragedy) by Celaestis

"You don't owe me anything." "Of course I do. If you have time now...there are things I'd like to say." Alex hesitates. "I know I don't have any right to ask you to listen," Henry adds. He sounds so hopeful though. A little closure doesn't sound like a terrible thing. Agreeing to go with Henry, alone, to Kensington Palace sounds like returning to the scene of a crime. It's been over a decade since their breakup - Alex is now a single dad forging his career as a lawyer, and Henry's finally getting the courage to stand up to his grandmother. In finding themselves, can they also find their way back to each other?

A Goddamn Fairytale by toffrox

Henry wants to be angry. He does. He wants to feel it simmering in his chest, wants to be sitting there like Alex is next to him with his eyes smouldering. He wants to be like Bea, pacing the room with her fists clenched, absolutely livid.  "You can't let her do this!" Bea cries. "It's just one tiny part of the day," Henry says with a sigh. "Everything else will be exactly as planned. I'm just not sure it's worth having a big fight over." Bea glares and looks like she's going to rant when Alex cuts in- "Fuck. That." - The Queen makes some uninvited changes to the upcoming Royal Wedding plans, but Alex is determined to give Henry the fairytale wedding he deserves.

the key that unlocked me by railmedaddy

Something sharp presses against his collarbone – the key that Alex wears around his neck – before he rolls his hips and Henry moans. Alex lifts his head and grins. “You like that, sweetheart?” he asks knowingly, rolling his hips again. He’s got his arms braced on either side of Henry’s head, looking down at Henry with dark, sparkling eyes and his mouth curved into a lopsided smile before raking his lower lip through his teeth. Alex’s curls have fallen forward into his face and at this angle, so close, he’s devastating. Instead of answering him, Henry tugs at the chain around Alex’s neck with one hand, pulling him down for a kiss. He gives in, sliding one hand into Henry’s hair as he kisses him deeply, letting Henry take what he needs. or, Berlin, from Henry’s POV

go the distance by indomitablelove

His legs are like jello. He’s not entirely sure how he’s still upright. He’s running on fumes and the energy gel he’d been handed about forty minutes ago by one of the secret service as he’d passed by. Fumes, energy gel pouches, the roar of the crowd against New York streets, and pure adrenaline because he can see the finish line. He knows what’s there: June and Nora and Henry. Henry. The reason Alex is doing this whole damn thing in the first place. --- Alex decides to run a marathon. It's all Henry's fault, really.

making the headlines by stardisnight (athousandrooms), villageidiot

For no other reason than sheer boredom, Alex decides to set up a Google alert for the exact phrase "HRH Prince Henry." When Henry asks why, he quite literally cannot come up with a reason for the decision. He just… wants to. Also: five times Alex overreacted to a Google alert (and one time Henry did)

Captious (calculated to confuse, entrap or entangle in argument by lucky (revolutionbarbie)

“I’m so sorry I’m late.” Alex hadn't intended to be 45-minutes late to his blind date, he really hadn't. Thankfully Henry - broad-shouldered, blond, British and downright beautiful - didn't seem to mind.

and you would be there too by smc_27

It’s mostly dark out here, just the lamp poles in the parking lot casting a warm yellow glow across the packed snow. “We’re closed.” Henry spins around, heart racing, and sees the beautiful man from the café and from earlier at the shops. He cuts a stunning image, swinging one leg over the wooden fence rail and stepping into the parking lot as he pulls a red and black plaid shirt over his shoulders, his tan pants tight enough across his thighs to make Henry blush for noticing.

until next time!

#rwrb #firstprince #red white and royal blue #fic rec #rwrb fic #rwrb rec list

[autumnmobile12]

In this scene when Hector is threatening Lenore, he says the following, "...or I will rip your fucking throat out and break your fucking neck and we'll see how fucking well you live then."

All right, let's pretend for a moment Lenore was in any kind of danger and this was a legitimate threat: Is Hector just bluffing (as if Lenore's not going to know her own weaknesses) or would breaking her neck actually result in some permanent damage if he succeeded?

In other words, can the Netflix's Castlevania vampires be crippled?

Modern vampire media plays fast and loose with Bram Stoker's rules, (I mean, the more powerful Hellsing vampires can even walk around in sunlight; it just annoys them,) but in every other vampire-themed series I can think of right now, short of the classic stake through the heart or the head being removed, vampires tend to come back from just about anything. Regrowing limbs, regenerating catastrophic blood less, etc. The series Shiki actually has a pretty disturbing rundown of what vampires can and can't survive, courtesy of a doctor capturing one and putting her through a series of inhumane experiments to see what will actually kill her. (This one also has a pretty similar explanation to Castlevania as to why vampires fear holy relics, and it's the only modern vampire series I've seen that actually has the 'sacred ground is off limits' factor.)

When the chips are down, Hector's probably just overreaching here. (Or possibly trying to intimidate Lenore on the mistaken assumption she's a 'helpless lady.')

But I do think it's an interesting notion to have vampirism not being the 'cure all, return to factory setting in case of emergency' trope we see everywhere because the 'factory setting' is different for everyone. Such as vampires experiencing permanent injuries or even terminal illnesses. The light of the moon is just reflected sunlight, so a vampire with a skin condition that makes them extra sensitive to even moonlight could be possible. Also, vampires developing illnesses like blood disorders, rabies, even the ones who have animal forms contracting mange, certain cancers, neurological or physiological conditions they were born with that a vampire's bite didn't 'cure.'

Or maybe they have a whole other range of afflictions specific only to their species.

Example: Aside from Carmilla and Godbrand, none of Dracula's Generals speak, not even Cho even though she has a flashback in Season 3. In a Hellsing/Castlevania crossover I was working on, I wrote a part where the Generals had an ongoing bet of whether or not Cho was too arrogant to bother speaking with the plebs or if she actually couldn't speak, implying she has a speech disorder that predated her being a vampire.

...

I've read books where humans with asthma, severe scoliosis, and even Alzheimer's Disease were cured after becoming a vampire, and I do think that's wonderful.

But there's also the part of me that thinks, "Nah, too easy." I want to see vampires who are blind or deaf or both, autistic vampires, 10th century Chinese vampire ladies who still have maimed feet from the foot-binding of their childhoods, vampires who suffer from dementia and are terrified of losing hundreds of years worth of memories, dyslexic vampires, paraplegic vampires, vampires with autoimmune disease, or allergies outside of being unable to enjoy the gift to humanity that is garlic bread.

#castlevania #hector #lenore #castlevania vampires #castlevania headcanons #can vampires be crippled? #hellsing #shiki #castlevania netflix #vampires #seriously #of all the things #why garlic bread?

[crimeronan]

the audacity of someone just openly saying they couldn't possibly find any interest or relatability to any modern woman protag is just... what the fuck 😭

can you only read books with characters that are carbon copies of yourself? do you need unchallenging simple narratives devoid of any feminism or radical ideas spoon fed to you also?

diagnosed with terminal "I am uncomfortable when we are not about me" disease

THE STRANGEST PART IS BASED ON THE URL I THINK THEYRE A WOMAN?? NO PRONOUNS OR GENDER IN BIO SO CANNOT BE SURE BUT I JST. that almost makes it Worse to me. earnestly believing that media with women as protags is automatically lesser bc women can't possibly be written three-dimensionally.... by anyone including women.... when you are a woman yourself.... SPARE ME???? that is not a preference??? that is misogyny????

#(the url had 'mama' in it which is where the gender assumption comes from.) #i honest to god didnt think people still said 'i only read about men bc men are written complexly and women arent' in 2024 #in like 2012 when youre only consuming superhero media then you get a pass i guess #BUT IN 2024??? WHEN THERE IS SO MUCH MAINSTREAM HORROR DRAMA AND COMEDY THAT'S ABOUT WOMEN?? ARE YOU SERIOUSSSSSSS #replies #the fucking AUDACITY to say 'i trust media recs except when the protags are women and then i dont trust your taste in media at all bc women #are bad 💕💕💕' I AM EATING YOUR BONE MARROW

[viksalos]

reading up on autism to figure out what the fuck is going on with me and making a list of personal pros and cons to figure out whether i should feel good or bad about it. as one does

pros: hyperlexia, deeply compassionate, talent for mathematics and the sciences/can do calculations of reasonable complexity in my head, visual hypersensitivity/decent artistic ability when replicating from still life/good at distinguishing subtle colors, acute hearing/good at identifying distinct sounds and sonic textures/deeply moved by music, can rotate some shapes in my head really fast i guess

cons: people can tell something is "off" about me in a fraction of a second and will be anywhere from begrudgingly polite to overtly hostile about it, terminal "not like other girls" disease/feeling of disconnect with existing in a feminine body, can pace for hours on end until my legs hurt, frequent crying & shutdowns, talk about myself and my interests extensively and can't seem to find a way to stop or better relate to others outside of mirroring them, productive work that actually *utilizes* my talents seems to only happen in increasingly infrequent bursts of hyperfocus, recurring identity issues stemming from a fundamental feeling of being born wrong and belonging nowhere, visceral hypersensitivity means i'm in pain from the normal functioning of my own organs for most of the day, people have compared me to sheldon cooper and elon musk, i am constantly begging for the sweet release of death,

#text #hmm. this post was funnier in my head #to be clear i am not one of those ''aut1sm is a superpower'' people and i'm aware that my ''gifts'' afford me significant privilege #but they also used to be things i liked about myself even when i was depressed #now that i'm anywhere from 3-5 yrs into burnout and can't rly *access* my gifts in the capacity i used to be able to anymore #it's rly hard to be positive about things. lol #i used to think that if people were going to think i was weird forever that i should at least be useful #which may not be possible to the degree it once was. and i realize was also a damaging and unhelpful mindset to begin with #tbh i'm rly jealous of the zoomers who seem to have more knowledge about/be more accepting of this stuff. #i think i was just in denial for years. but after looking into it more i'm more certain i'm aut1stic than i've been of anything in my life #which is significant considering the; yknow; identity issues. lol #it's kind of hilarious how many of my old text posts just scream ''undiagnosed aut1stic burnout'' in retrospect #sorry for all the behaviors and stuff. i love my mutuals but i think i have to be on this website less #while i figure my stuff out. i'll still check in but not as often #feel free to reach out in the meantime. i already miss a lot of my friends i lost contact with while going thru it <3 #wow these tags got away from me. ok bye

[chaosintheavenue]

Design Doc 3: Boulder

Chaos's obsession level: 3/3

I adore the Boulder Dome, so buckle up for a wild ride!

Bio med gel (the stuff inside these bad boys) was invented in the Boulder Dome.

'Those who refuse are put in cold sleep, using technology the original Dome scientists developed to aid space travel'- I've said it before but I'll say it again: Outer Worlds much?

This might be my British ass underestimating the size of the US, but it's always seemed utterly outrageous to me that it took Agnes and co a year to travel from California (let's assume Shady Sands or the Boneyard) to Boulder.

So, allegedly the Boulder scientists picked up on broadcasts from Denver, but ignored them because they were afraid of being attacked by 'diseased people'? My siblings in VB, YOU are the diseased people here.

Wagner from Denver makes a daring cameo appearance.

'Presper was able to talk everyone into a conference via video monitor' Zoom calls canon. I don't make the rules.

What does Presper consider Goddard responsible for? My best guesses would be a) The Plaguening of the scientists (which I believe was an accident and not Presper's intent) and/or b) The deaths of some of the scientists during the journey to the Dome.

There were mini quests planned that sound a whole lot like the 76 daily quest Ecological Balance.

We have our first mention of nutrient paste.

On how designers should express the overall feel and tone of their area to the audio team: 'Emote if necessary. Do interpretative dance. I don't fucking care'. This may or may not have been present in the last two documents, but it tickled me this morning.

Presper calling the Jackals 'humanitarians' is peak comedy to me.

The nutrient paste is the only food they have?!

Interesting difference between my lore and design doc lore. Officially, the interior of the Boulder Dome is very brightly lit, but in my version, all non-essential lighting is meticulously switched off to conserve power.

And now the design doc is mildly contradicting itself re: why the scientists wear environmental suits. It's definitely intended to be because they have the New Plague first and foremost, not because of the broken air filtration.

'Check for emergencies and task list'- I swear, these scientists are just playing real-life Among Us.

Who or what is Bedhead?

The original Think Tank appears. I find it equally adorable and hilarious that they want to 'taste' things like Nuka Cola and Mentats by having them dropped into their tank.

The doc is now claiming that the Prisoner was intended to be a vault dweller? Nah, no thanks.

Goddard's little Drama section is titled 'Angry Authority' lol.

The Daughter of Hecate living with the Jackals is literally called 'Crazy Bitch'.

I absolutely love how it's made abundantly clear that Goddard is irreversibly bald, just to make sure the Prisoner doesn't get any ideas of delegating the Jackals problem to him.

Goddard's terminal login is Sisyphus jhgfdfgh.

It's now been specifically pointed out twice that characters here don't smile much. Welp, can't say I blame 'em...

Saw a throwaway mention of Isaac Gant's armor and squealed. This is what I've been reduced to. God help us all when I get to doc 7...

The Robobrains subtly attempting to self-destruct despite their programming is sad.

There's bits of the Denver design document duplicated in here. Pretty sure the quest section was copied across as a template. If I had a penny for every time I've had to read about getting the brewery units working again...

I knew I didn't invent the name 'Nutripaste'!

Podunk, Colorado is back again in another copy-pasted segment.

Ending slides time. Most of these are fucking bleak. Poor Xian...

I find it intriguing that there was an ending slide for a ghoul victory.

#chaos reads the vb docs

[justcahttingtothevoidcat]

Another Dark Age Mystery

HI Cat, you know I was thinking

That Samual Pepys I am not, although I wish I was because then this little side blog of mine could be useful to folk in the future. But then I was thinking, will anything of the internet survive in the future?

Like, if there was a disaster, natural or man-made, would whoever survived be able or even want to come back to this technology. I had initially thought this would be an interesting archive for folk hundreds of years in the future but what if it simply vanishes, like dust in the wind.

It's entirely possible that folk in the dark ages had their own form of twitter and nobody knows a thing about it, I find that quite a funny thought. It wasn't dark like lack of light there is just no written records and so much of our documentation exists online that if we disappear who would know, aside from yourself of course cat, the void exists well out of time and space as we know it.

Well let me see, what would I tell someone 500 years in the future about life right now, well in Scotland we are still agitating for a new Independence vote, although it's taking its damn time...

We have 50 year high inflation, the price of food, heating and fuel is high and as a result people will suffer and die. The welfare state is crumbling because of Tory neglect and "New Labour" (read central right) before them thinking a wee bit of privatisation here and there couldn't possibly be a bad thing. Disability benefits, the old age pension and unemployment benefits are too low to live in anything but poverty, check your history books to see how many people they killed with those and the horrors of calling someone terminally ill fit to work etc.

Libraries are closing, they may open them for "heat hubs" though. The education system is still being taught as if we are Victorians being prepared for the mills and factories, completely out dated and in need of reform. There aren't enough houses for people to live in, there are still people who are queer phobic and Trans People have become the new thing to get cross about, in the early 00's it was people on Benefits, see Benefit Britain for further info. Also Fascism is rising again, so there's that.

The Satanic panic is also back, vailed by Qanon, whose threads are all in the far right and directly link to people thinking vaccines are bad, which leads me to the rising rates of Polio, Measles, Mumps, rickets and other diseases making a resurgence and because English water suppliers have been pumping shit into the rivers and sea no doubt we will soon see a return of Cholera, Typhus and other such delights.

Oh, we still have Covid 19 and MonkeyPox which is not a STI although it is more prevalent in the queer community, particularly among men or AMAB folk.

The UK Gov is an international Joke, they are notably absent from helping with all of the above. America's last president seems determined to spend his last years in prison, and good luck to him I say! There have been terrible floods with the Monsoon that follow exceptionally high temps earlier this year in the Sub-Indian continent, China is in Drought, Europe is in Drought, large parts of North America are in Drought.

Famine is rife in Africa, not helped by the war in Ukraine which Putin seems determined to continue despite having lost in the international stage. The footage from Ukraine, like most wars, is awful.

I can't speak much to African countries or South American ones because they rarely turn to them in our news, I know that South Africa has had trouble, as has Nigeria and the war between the Gov and the Tigray people has just resumed. I know that some South American countries are trying to come together over things going on in Argentina and I know that America has fucked over these countries because "Communism bad".

I don't know much about the goings on in Australia or New Zealand either or Japan and other countries in the Pacific, again we get little to no news about these areas unless you go looking for it on news websites. I also don't know much about what is happening in the Middle East aside from the Afghan generalities we are given. I also know there is no legitimate way for people to get to asylum in the UK from these areas, hence the treacherous dingy crossings and people smuggling.

I also know there are good things going on, science progressing slowly, people doing wonderful things and the fact we've made it this far into history shows there is more good folk than bad. This is a basic overlay of the "Oh shit" things of the day. Remember Mr Pepys I am not.

So many people have lived before me, many more will (maybe) live after me. Not a lot of us get recorded, but believe me you still matter. How you treat others matters, how you treat the earth and the living being on it matters. Even if you don't get your name recorded in the annuls of history, you still matter.

[lnkedmyheart]

People- YuuMori exaggerates how evil the nobility and upper class is.

(Ignoring the fact that it presents some nobles as decent people while focussing on the one's that aren't)

Me-

They thought the poor deserved to stay poor because they were lazy and/or undeserving of fortune.

Orphans would remain orphans even after adoption and were often regarded as intruders and outsiders. An adopted lower class orphan could never be associated with the rich family that adopted them. Adopted orphans could be abandoned and were often subject to harsher punishments and less care. Around 60% of the criminals were estimated to be orphans because of their situation.

They literally shoved naked toddlers up hot soot filled chimneys to clean them leading them to develop cancer and other terminal diseases. Many of these kids would sometimes get stuck in the chimneys and people would try to smoke them out by lighting a fire under them. Sometimes they'd have to leave the stuck child there because it was too hard to get them out and let them die there. The nobility and the master sweeps threw a massive hissy fit when the practice was abolished and actually continued the practice till very very recently. Oh and the kids literally slept with the same rag blanket they used to collect the chimney dirt during the day.

The Andover Workhouse Scandal- the workers were so starved and underpaid they ate the animal bones they were supposed to be crushing.

The fucking Two Penny Hangover- a sleeping arrangement for the poor where you slept hanging on a rope for 2 pennies completely exposed to the elements and they woke you up by untying the rope on one end and letting you crash face first into the floor.

Or you could sleep in the 4 penny coffin if you managed to have enough to spare.

The Poor Law Amendment of 1834. Oh how do we fix poverty? Why, by getting those lazy homeless bastards off their assess and forcing them to do gruelling absolutely awful work at warehouses for bare minimum wages and then when they can't pay off the loans and debts, by tossing the entire family into prisons and running them into the ground with work and little food.

Somewhat less related but Ignaz Semmelweis went insane because he was mocked and attacked for insisting that the victorian doctors actually wash their hands before performing child births after working at the morgue even though the doctors were practically causing a large number of pregnant women to die due to sepsis.

Seriously, read any Charles Dickens or Thomas Hardy book and you'll see absolutely how disgusting so many of the upper and middle class people were.

#tw: child abuse #yuuMori #yuukoku no moriarty #moriarty the patriot #meta #the series does lowkey exaggerate aspects but its not far off from the reality #of what someone like Liam and Louis would have experienced #or how the nobility and the aristocracy would have treated the poor

[theconstitutionisgayculture]

hi sorry to vent in ur asks like this but im tired of life and I have nobody to talk to. I'm so worried about the world and covid and bad vaxxes and Ukraine and Canada and fucking biden but im a year away from graduating college and I don't have time to do anything but work and study. my grandmother is in the hospital with fractured vertebra and cracked bones, all of my other grandparents have diseases that are progressively getting worse recently, my terminally ill uncle has reached the average length that people survive with his cancer and his health has gotten worse since Christmas. I spend all day learning sad things and more sad things and I come home to keep reading about sad things. I'm failing one of my required classes but I can't fail bc it would push my graduation to another year. I want to ask for a break but midterms start in a week and I cant afford to fall behind in anything. I'm so tired and afraid but there isn't a single thing I or anyone else can do except sit and wait and hope and honestly I can't see myself living for much longer like this. I'm sorry to bring so much stuff in your asks knowing that you can't even do anything but I have noone to talk to in real life or anywhere but anonymous asks really

Damn, I'm so sorry anon. It sounds like your life is really fucking hard right now. I'm not making this about me, but several times over the past year I've felt similarly. I was scared and angry and kept thinking "if things get too much worse I'm going to have to seriously consider how much of this I want to be around for". And I didn't have even half the stuff you're going through. My point with telling you this is that you're stronger than you think you are. You've held on through more than I could ever handle, and I don't consider myself to be mentally weak. As much as I can say without knowing you, I think you'll survive this, anon.

I know you didn't ask for advice, so feel free to ignore this, but I think the best thing you could do is just turn off the news completely and focus on your family and your studies. The world will go the way it goes with or without you watching it happen. Spend as much time with your loved ones as you can, and treasure every moment you have with them. Make them happy moments. Tell them you love them. Tell them anything you've always wanted to tell them but have been putting off. Try your best not to have any regrets after they're gone, and as many happy memories as you can stuff into your head. In some ways, I think it's a little bit easier losing people when you've known it's coming for a while. You can mentally prepare and make sure they're as loved and as comfortable as possible.

[mellometal]

Is it time to tear ANOTHER Dhar Mann video to shreds? YOU BET.

I've been sitting on this one for a bit because I wanted to make sure I talk about this tactfully. The subject of parents abandoning their disabled children is a very touchy one.

Parents abandoning their disabled children simply for being disabled is way too common. Like, I understand that not everyone has the resources to care for a disabled child (which is why you reach out for help, and why people like me, who work with disabled people, exist), but it doesn't mean you just walk out of their life. There are exceptions, like if you truly didn't want children or something like that, but just flat-out walking out of your kid's life BECAUSE they're disabled is fucked up.

I know someone personally whose biological mother abandoned her when she was born. Why? Because she's disabled. Physically, and mentally, to a point. I work with this woman on a daily basis. I don't really know WHY exactly her biological mother abandoned her, but I do know that her being disabled was part of it. It's sad. It doesn't affect her, thankfully. I'm happy that she's got her biological dad, her brother, and another maternal figure in her life, at least.

ANYWAYS. Before we get to the topic at hand, I need to put an obligatory trigger warning, like I do with EVERY Dhar Mann post:

This post will be talking about parents abandoning their disabled children simply for being disabled, treating disabilities like they're tragedies (in this case, we're talking about autism...again), divorce, and some SPICY ableist bullshit from an allistic (nonautistic) PIECE OF SHIT.

If any of this triggers you or makes you uncomfortable in any way, you don't have to read this post. This isn't worth putting yourself in a bad state mentally. I would never ask for any of you to put yourselves in that position all for a post. Put your mental health and well-being first. Consume media that sparks joy for you.

As far as my response goes, it's definitely more calm than normal. Funny....since this video is about autism spectrum disorder again. (Third time's the charm, huh, Dhar Mann? NOT.)

LET'S FUCKING GET IT.

The video starts off with these two parents (Gwen and Allen) in a psychologist's office. The psychologist tells the parents that their son (Chance) is autistic, and she tries to explain what autism is to the parents, but Allen cuts her off. Why? Because he teaches at a prestigious university, so he AUTOMATICALLY knows what autism is from that fact alone.

Um, excuse me? Just because you're a teacher at a prestigious university, it doesn't mean you're an expert in everything. It doesn't make you an expert in ASD or anything like that. Unless you SPECIALIZE in that area. Even then, shut the fuck up. The people who know about being autistic are AUTISTIC PEOPLE THEMSELVES! SHOCKER.

Hey, Dhar Mann! QUIT WITH THE VIDEOS ABOUT AUTISTIC LITTLE WHITE BOYS AND YOUNG WHITE AUTISTIC CISHET MEN! I'M SICK AND TIRED OF IT. It's annoying, ignorant, and it feels like you're doing this on purpose at this point to piss people off. If you're so uninformed about autism in women and girls, FUCKING ASK AUTISTIC WOMEN AND GIRLS! DO BETTER RESEARCH THAT DOESN'T INVOLVE AUTISM SPEAKS. The Autism Self Advocacy Network (ASAN) and the Autistic Women and Nonbinary People Network (AWN) are great organizations to go to for any kind of research on ASD in women and girls. STOP GOING OFF OF THE BRAINS OF AUTISTIC WHITE BOYS AND AUTISTIC WHITE MEN.

I don't feel I need to go too deep into the fact that autistic women, autistic girls, autistic nonbinary people, autistic BIPOC, autistic AAPI, autistic LGBT people, autistic teenagers, and autistic adults exist. Y'all already know.

Gwen asks the psychologist if that means Chance isn't healthy. (I understand not knowing about autism, but don't treat it like it's a terminal illness. Please.) The psychologist tells her that Chance is fine, but he just learns differently and might need more support compared to his peers.

Yeah, autism can affect how you learn about certain things (limited and repetitive patterns), but there are other disabilities that can affect learning as well. Like how dyslexia can affect your ability to read, dyspraxia can affect your ability to do math, and Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) can affect your ability to focus or on impulse control. Autism affects how your brain is developed, it affects you socially, behaviorally, and how you communicate.

Allen is upset, says that he can't have a son "with a learning disability" (ASD is a neurological disability, not necessarily a learning disability), and treats Chance like he's stupid for being autistic. Gwen tells her husband that autism doesn't make you any less intelligent, WHICH IS SO FUCKING TRUE. ABSOLUTE FACTS. I was totally with her until she began that little monologue with "Just because a person HAS autism". SAY "JUST BECAUSE A PERSON'S AUTISTIC" INSTEAD! IT'S NOT HARD. PERSON FIRST LANGUAGE ISN'T WHAT EVERY DISABLED PERSON PREFERS. Allen says that "they could have another kid" and "put Chance up for adoption". Gwen obviously wasn't down with that. Allen gives his wife an ultimatum that it's either HIM or their son Chance. Gwen says that she can't choose between the two, but she will stand by her autistic son. Allen gets up and leaves the office, saying he wants a divorce.

Years pass by, Gwen is single and taking care of her autistic son Chance, and Allen has a new life with a ✨perfect son✨ (Samuel). He never mentions the son HE abandoned (Chance). He's completely forgotten about Gwen and Chance. (YOU OWE SO MUCH CHILD SUPPORT, ALLEN.)

Hey, Allen, how much do you wanna bet that your ✨perfect son✨ Samuel is autistic too?

There's the SATs, they're announcing a winner, and guess who it is? IT'S OBVIOUSLY CHANCE, OF COURSE. He's got the highest score in the country, with Samuel in second place. Allen is PISSED.

Chance gives a speech about how his mom really helped him, he struggled with autism, how Allen LITERALLY ABANDONED HIM, and THE CROWD GOES FUCKING WILD. Samuel, instead of being a sore loser, APPLAUDS FOR CHANCE. Stay humble, Sam.

My thoughts on the video? If you cannot tell by my tone throughout this post, IT WAS DOG SHIT. This video was insensitive to the true reality of parents abandoning their disabled children just because they're disabled. What do I expect from Dhar Mann at this point?

Here's my response to his video below. Don't worry, I will fully type out my response soon for anyone who cannot read the screenshots easily. It's a lot easier for me to do that on the desktop site than it is for me to do it on my phone.

For anyone who can’t read my response, I’m typing it out for you. Like I said, it’s easier for me to type it out on the desktop site than it is for me to type it out on my phone. It’s a real royal pain in the ass. But because I’m trying to make my posts easier to read for people, I’m doing this anyway. /lighthearted

First, second, and third screenshots (broken up into paragraphs):

Hey, listen, I appreciate the message you’re trying to go for, but can you please stop putting autistic people into a box? Can you stop treating being autistic like it’s a tragedy? Not every single autistic person is a little white boy in elementary school who’s considered “wild and unruly” or “super quiet and makes no friends”, nor are they a young white cishet man who’s a super genius or is how Chris Chan was before she came out as trans. (For anyone who doesn’t know about Chris Chan, there are many documentaries people have made on YouTube, and I highly recommend Geno Samuel’s docuseries, if you’re really interested in learning about Chris Chan.)

Autistic women, girls, nonbinary people, BIPOC, APPI, LGBT people, teenagers, and adults all exist too. 

It’s very apparent now that you get your resources from Autism $peaks, a hate group that spends the vast majority of their money on funding eugenics instead of helping autistic people like they claim, claims that only little white boys and young white cishet men are autistic and ignores all other autistic people who don’t fit that description, have no autistic people on their leader board or on any board for that matter, have members who have actually fantasized about k1lling their autistic children, treat autism like it’s a tragedy or a disease someone can catch (completely false), act like autism should be cured (there is no cure, and ABA therapy is a total shit show in itself), and treats autistic people like they’re broken and need to be fixed. Also, not every autistic person is a Super Genius(tm). That’s so demeaning to autistic people who aren’t seen as intelligent in any way. I’m autistic and seen as smart; however, there are subjects I’m stronger in than others.

If you can’t handle the possibility of having autistic children, or just disabled children in general, DON’T HAVE CHILDREN. If you can’t handle working with or alongside disabled people, including autistic people, maybe find a different profession. Even if you do that, you’ll never get away from disabled people. Disabled people aren’t a disease. We’re human beings just like neurotypical and able-bodied people.

Fourth and fifth screenshots (broken up into paragraphs): 

I would highly suggest getting resources from reputable organizations for ASD, such as the Autism Self Advocacy Network (ASAN) and the Autistic Women and Nonbinary People Network (AWN). Talk to any autistic person who isn’t a little white boy or a young white cishet man. 

Instead of using the puzzle piece, which is a symbol that many autistic people, myself included, are offended by (because of Autism $peaks and other organizations before them using it, plus it symbolizes that only autistic children exist and that we’re “missing a piece” like we’re broken), use the rainbow infinity sign (for all neurodivergent people) or the red and gold infinity sign (just for autistic people). Instead of “lighting it up blue”, light it up red or gold. Do both if you want. 

I’m actually really sick and tired of seeing just autistic little white boys and young autistic white cishet men being represented in the media, and y’all manage to fuck that up too. 

Before anyone mentions Sia’s movie “Music”, that’s also very poor representation of autistic girls. Besides, the actress who played the autistic girl isn’t even autistic. She MOCKED autistic people. I know she’s a kid, but that’s still super fucked up. I hope she’s able to turn that around. 

If anyone would like to discuss this topic with me or ask any questions, feel free to. I’ll answer as best as I can. Thank you and have a good night.

Before I get attacked for mentioning Chris Chan in my response, I bring up Chris Chan because allistic people think that every autistic person is like her (especially before she came out as trans). That person is part of why I wasn't open about being autistic or talking about my diagnosis until this year. I didn't want to be grouped up with Chris Chan because I do have very similar interests to her, I've been seen as cringey for having said interests, and just the way Chris treated autistic people who were formerly diagnosed with A$p3rg3r$ $yndr0m3 (like I was) really made me feel even more alienated.

Also, S1a supports A$ (Autism $p3aks). She's not a very good person to support. Some of her music is good, but her as a person....no. Her movie "Music" was gross, from what I've read about it and seen pictures of.

If you've read this far, thank you so much!

#mello speaks #dhar mann #dhar mann talk #dhar mann will live to regret his decision to make these fucked up cringe videos #dhar mann will live to regret his decision uwu #dhar mann is a piece of human garbage #please stop supporting dhar mann #autism isn't a tragedy #we need better representation for autistic people who aren't little white boys or young white cishet men #dhar mann is a cringe ass nae nae baby #tw abandonment #tw ableism #cw sia mention #cw chris chan mention #tw dhar mann

[starr-fall-knight-rise]

Humans are Space Orcs, “Keeping Pets.”

It’s been a while since I have given you one of Krill’s rages. Plus I got up late this morning, so lol. Hope you like it

Discord server invite https://discord.gg/VSj2EC

From the Journal of Biology and Medicine 

This research focuses primarily on the ability of the human to interact and bond with different types of species. All over the galaxy it has been seen that humans have the ability to interact with and understand different species around them in ways that are meaningful for both parties. However, a different and more interesting phenomenon witnessed on the human home world is that practice of keeping a “pet: an animal which is not considered sentient that is allowed to live and interact with the humans, sometimes sharing their houses, and even sharing their beds. No one knows what underlies this profound urge to bring other creatures into their homes, but it is a practice humans have been participating in for well over four thousands years, perhaps even, since the beginning of their existence.

-

Am I allowed o make a complaint! No no I am not asking. I was simply warning you that I am going to complain in a very round about way. I don’t really care whether you want to complain or not. I am simply angry at how everything humans do seems to be a direct attempt to make me angry, or scare e half to death. I honestly think it is on purpose, a species cannot feasibly be this reckless if that were not the case. I mean, they bring apex predators into their beds for Sanctum’s sake. Here, here let me explain.

The Dog. It basically just a fucking wolf. Yeah, once upon a time humans cuddled up to the most cunning pack predator in the world and thought it would be fun to bring them inside around their kids. I mean are you kidding me, this creature can grow to over one hundred pounds and has razor sharp K-9 teeth that can rip your throat out. It has a nose that can smell the adrenaline excretions…. It can flip the smell fear. IN fact humans say that this creature is domesticated, but may I point out to you that dogs are responsible for killing people all across the world. It’s a predator, it wasn’t to eat your face. And before you go saying , well that is only big dogs, the little dogs are worse. They are big killers trapped inside a tiny body and that makes them neurotic and angry and way more willing to just go ahead and chomp your finger right off.  And humans LOVE these creatures, they love them. They will dress them up in little sweaters  and little shoes, and they will coo over them constantly. It is HORRIFIC. They even give them to disabled people, some of the most vulnerable of their species, and they just hand them an apex predator like it’s no big deal!..... I’m getting worked up, aren't I?

The cat: So basically a tiny tiger that still has all the instincts of a tiny tiger. If it were bigger it would definitely kill you. Now luckily for us the domesticated ones only come in one size, and that size is rather small (for the most part) because if these suckers were big, they would be like tigers or pumas, and they would be more than willing to rip our face off. What is worse, at least with dogs you can argue that they are well tempered and loving, but cats. They hate you, they are using you and they know it, everyone knows it. They will come up to you to be petted and instead of walking away like a normal creature when they are done they will just claw you, just claw you no explanation to apology just claws. And what is WORSE is the people who own cats are even more delusional than the ones that own dogs because I bet you there is a human reading this right now that says well my cat is nice, or another human that thinks well yeah my cat does this sometimes, but he/she’s so cute and I love them anyway so there…. Humans are blinded by their need to touch and hold fuzzy things.

Horses: Ok, I know this one does not go inside, but hear me out on this one. It is a giant frigging deer thing that comes in as many sizes as dogs do, and one day some a hole human decided to hop on one’s back and go riding into the sunset, never mind that this thing could kick you into a state of internal hemorrhaging even “I” Would balk at.  IT i to big put it away and let it roam free, but no instead humans decided to ride it.

Rabbit: Shouldn’t you be eating these things? Also, they have clawed back feet, and sometimes they bite. Why do you want one so badly

Rats : It's a fucking rat! Like boubonic plague! Is any of that ringing a bell. This thing is literally vermin, its job is to carry diseases and be nasty, and you want to keep one in your child’s bedroom 

Guinea pigs/gerbils/ mice: See rats above, I am just saying these things are tiny rats and their job is to carry diseases. It is gross so don’t touch them.

Birds: Again with the disease thing. These guys are flying rats. Ok I get it humans love cute things that can make noise and talk, but these guys are super loud and expensive to take care of. Just do yourself a solid and let it go, it belongs out in the wild where it can be annoying outside and not inside. 

Lizards: I mean ok…. Pretty sure these carry diseases too.  Also, they will never love you and they are very expensive to keep.

Snake: it's a fucking snake! One of humanities the worst fears, and you WANT one. This thing has haunted the nightmares of your people for the past couple thousand years, and you want to cuddle it. Plus you have to feed it dead mice. Some of you have a snake so big that it is capable of swallowing medium-sized animals whole. This is literally the definition of a predator, some of them are even venomous. Why- why-why-why-why do you have one. WHY DO YOU HAVE A SNAKE. THE MIND BOGGLES!

Tarantula: *slamming noises* You guys are just fucking with me now right. Just straight fucking with me. This isn’t serious. Like we have come all this way, just for me to learn about this shit. This isn’t real, it cannot be real because that would mean that you guys are way stupider than I thought you were. I mean…. I can't…. Nope I am done I cant…. I draw the line at big ass spiders.

Why hasn’t god terminated your species yet. Surely natural selection would not encourage you to actively seek out creatures that can kill and eat you. Why, why, why are you still getting bigger. Why are you thriving. Why am I here with you, why did I decide to leave the safety of my own planet 

*incoherent screaming”

“Why is the human need to touch other living things so damn strong!. What biological purpose is this!”

Rrrrrrrraaaaaaaaahahhhhhhh

[everyhowlmarksthedead]

BUSINESS AND PLEASURE

Johnny “Coco” Cruz x Chibs Telford’ daughter!Reader

“What if you should move to Santo Padre for two months...”

Chapter one.

Word count: 3.4k

Author comments: I hope you all enjoy. English isn’t my first language, so I’m sorry if I have some mistakes with grammar. Gif credits: @angels-reyes.

Thanks to my lovely beta reader and partner in crime with this one, @chibsytelford 💘

Tag list: @starrynite7114 @dazzledamazon @chibsytelford @mara-mpou @sammskellington 💥 (if you wanna be tagged, send me a message!)

Since you've been forced to move from Glasgow to Charming, your life has been a roller coaster with noisy falls into hell. Some days you were fine, the rest you were only available to create chaos around you. Your mother died because of a terminal disease, after fighting for two years, and the last time you saw your father before that it was when you were a child. Came to live with him after twelve years without no contact, except for a few calls every month, it was hard. Harder than he could imagine. 

The first days you were locked in the room he enabled to you in his house, where you only had a bed, a nightstand and a wardrobe. No picture, no colors around, nothing. It was kinda depressing. At least, he tried. He tried to re-build the good relationship you two have had in the past, before your mother kicked his ass out of Scotland, when Clay said he needed him at California, with the Sons'. 

Filip used to cook your favourite dishes, having had to learn to cook before. At first you only ate two or three bites, until one morning when you woke up hearing him screaming in scottish. You've never heard him so angry, and that scared you. Barefoot and silently, you went out of your room, sticking your head by the door frame of the kitchen. Unbelievable. He was arguing with his phone. Specifically with YouTube. You could see how he was watching a recipe of baked fish. It sounded easy, right? The problem was the sauce. Apparently he forgot to add some ingredients, and he had to repeat it from the start.

“Shit!” He shouted hitting the marble countertop, supporting his fist on it with his head down and a sigh in his mouth. “Fuckin' pepper and fuckin' lemon”.

“I don't like”. You said in a whisper, getting out of your hiding place. 

He turned at you frowned and upset, leaning against the furniture. Cross-armed, he shook his head with his gaze on the floor. You knew how frustrated he was, trying to kick you out of that sadness that it was consuming you. You lost your mother, you had to move out of your country, from the cold to the heat. And you truly hated sunny days. 

“I just... wanna make you feel like you're at home”. He said kinda desperately, scratching his head hard, completely disheveled. “I know this is not Scotland, nor your house. It's ok if you miss it, but this situation is killing me too. So, please, give me a break...”

You heard every word he told you, feeling the same knot he felt on his chest, and his voice about to drown in tears. You walked slowly towards him, looking inside your head for the correct things to say.

“I like the way you cook, but you scared the shit out of me, 'cause I didn't know you were shouting at YouTube”. You thought maybe some kind of joke could help, while he was holding your hands. “I don't like pepper, nor lemon, so it's fine. Maybe... we could have lunch together, if you're not busy with the club”.

“Fuc' da' club, caileag”. For the first time, you saw him smiling and it was amazing. “Do you think everything will be fine?” He sounded sad, simply sad. But you nodded without any doubt.

“We will be fine, athair”.

That was all he needed to hear. Chibs leaned towards you, placing a hand behind your head to leave a kiss on your forehead. Your hands held on his waist in a warm hug that you were wanting to give him since you arrived to Cali.

━━━━━━ (One year later) ━━━━━━

But what happened next was totally unexpected. You hear Happy talking with his prospect, around the corner of the workshop, about a dangerous mission they have to take care of, keeping them for two months out of Charming. And by Chibs decision, you're not coming. But he didn't tell you anything about it, before. Walking in the front yard, you find six motorbikes and a van you don't recognize from your charter, but belong to an MC. You're angry, so angry. Your steps are heavy and big, going faster to the clubhouse, taking off the rings of your fingers to keep them inside the pocket. You open the door suddenly, without warning the men who seems mexican sitting closer to your father. You only can see that fucking scottish who made a promise he's not gonna keep. And he sees the fury burning in your orbs. 

“Oh, shit”. It's everything he can say before one of your fists go straight to his face.

“Woah, woah, take it easy, chamaca!” One of the unknown man talks, trying to walk next to you, until you point it at him with the gun you had tucked under your shirt. All the men raise their hands with their eyes so much opened, letting you know that they're not gonna interfere again.

Time have passed. Some wounds has been closed and you have got used to the heat of the coast. Now, you're not who you used to be. SAMCRO changed you, having its good things and its bad things. You lost all the innocence you had, learning to defend yourself by fighting body-to-body and shooting weapons of different calibers. Happy and Tig usually try to catch you by surprise hitting you, but your faster than their old asses, blocking every hit that comes from nowhere. And sometimes you ‘play’ paintball with Juice on his free day. You're one of the Redwood family, being included in every mission one way or another, working hand by hand with the prospect; with the minimal difference that your father is your sponsor. This gives you two some problems because of the strong character you have inherited from him. And there are some times when you end up being beaten. The crew is used to it.

You turn to your father, who is rubbing his right cheek between some groans, supporting a hand on the pool table. You're breathing distressed with your eyes full of tears. You know how it works. When he leaves Charming, you don't have any notices for almost one week. You live every day with the pain of not knowing if he's still alive or not. Two months is too long. You can't even live without him at this point of your life, how are you supposed to do it?

“You promised me!” You yell at him pointing your chest with your own forefinger. “You said ‘us against the world’! You said it!”

Your voice is breaking, drowned by the tears that run down your face and your neck.

“You're a fucking liar! You're doin' the same you did thirteen years ago!” Yes, you can see how your words are affecting him, but you don't care. 

“Baby, listen...” He tries to give some steps towards you, receiving a push on his chest.

“I don' wanna hear more bullshit”. Putting the gun again behind your back, you turn to the front door, with a slight pause next to the other charter. “By the way”. You stare to the man you pointed seconds ago. “Next time I'm talking to my father, you shut the fuck up...” Reading his patch, you raise your eyes at him. “Presidente”.

You slam the door shut after you leave, seeing Happy next to your motorbike. He knows you know what is gonna happen by the tears running your cheeks. But even if you don't wanna talk with him, being your confidant since you came to Charming, he wraps strongly your body with his arms before you can run away from him. Crying inconsolably, you hide your face on his chest without moving your arms, only supporting your weight against him. Happy rest his chin on your head with a sigh, 'cause he knows well how much you suffer when your father attends a mission out of town.

“Are you leaving too?” You finally ask, even when you don't wanna hear the answer. He nods slowly, cleaning your tears with his long fingers.

“I'm sorry. I promise I'll try to write you”. He says hoarsely. “I'm sure you didn't let Chibs explain himself, but listen… Not even my prospect is coming. It's really dangerous for you two, we're gonna be ok, (Y/N)”.

“Who are they? What are they doing here?”

“They're Mayans, from Santo Padre. Oscar and Canche ‘family’. We can't leave you here, alone, without any protection. So, Chibs asked them to take care of you while we're out”.

Now you understand what's happening. It's suppose you should move from Charming to the south Cali, surrounded by men you don't know. Leave your house, again. Your cry appears again, shaking your head with some sobs stuck on your throat.

“Baby, listen, listen”. Happy try to have your attention cupping your face between his hands. “They're good men, they're gonna take care of you. And Canche will go to Santo Padre every week to see you”.

“I don' wanna go, Happy. I wanna go with you, please”. You beg in tears, with your lips trembling.

“(Y/N), you can't”. He sentences, trying not to sound too rude. He snort closing his eyes for a second. “Listen, they also have a car scrapping. You can work there. You like cars and you studied to be mechanic. 'Am sure these two months gonna' pass so fast that you're not gonna notice it”.

The front door of the club house gets opened. You turn for a while, just to see how the men gets out of it. You sigh, looking at Happy again. And you nod, even when you don't want to do it. Pulling yourself away from him, you're heading towards your motorcycle. In silence, after fastening the helmet, you start the engine. If you have to leave Charming you wanna do it as soon as possible. So, it's time to pack your stuff.

And that is what you're doing, when you hear your father's keys opening the door. His footsteps coming close to you, watching sideways how he leans against the door frame arm-crossed. Your basic clothes are already inside the suitcase on the bed, closing the zip after checking again that you have taken everything you could need. In the bag next to it, you keep your laptop, your headphones and all the chargers, in addition to other things.

“Please, talk to me”. Chibs says, but there's no answer from you. “I didn't know how to tell you, and I'm sorry, honey. But I promise...”

“Don't”. You turn at him raising your forefinger. “Don't make any promise you're not gonna keep, Filip”.

He knows you're truly sad when you call him by his real name. Chibs walks towards you, holding your hands slowly hoping that you're not gonna push him away again.

“Bishop and his guys 'gonna take care of you. And Happy said he told you about ‘Romero and Brothers’. I'm pretty sure you're gonna have fun there”. He's trying to make you understand.

“I don' care. I'm gonna be away from you”. You finally say, letting go all the pain you have inside your chest, oppressing your heart. “And you're not allowed to text me, nor call me. Could you imagine how distressing it feels?”

“'You think it isn't for me? I'm not stone cold, even if sometimes it's what it looks like, (Y/N). I think about you all the time. About what you're doing at any moment. If you're eating well, if you're sleeping... All the fucking time”. He replies trying to hide his anger. “But I need to protect you. And there aren't better hands than Bishop's”.

You nod. You don't want to continue arguing with him. Filip hugs you tightly, hiding your face on his neck, trying to not break in cry again. Your hands clinging on the back of his shirt. You're not sure how many time you have been like this, when your father decides that he should call the Mayans to pick you up.

The roars of motorcycles, coming just in time, have your attention. You take your stuff, rolling the suitcase over the floor till you find them outside. Your father takes it to keep it inside the van, before saying goodbye.

“They're gonna take care of you, ok?” He says again, holding your cheeks between his hands. You nod in silence about to cry. Leaving a kiss in your forehead, he hugs you. “If I can, I will text you. I promise. And I'll keep that one”.

“Two months?” You ask raising your gaze at him.

“I'll be back before your birthday”. Assures you. “I love ya' more than anything. You know, rai'?”

You nod again swallowing, before leaving one last caresses in your left cheek, cleaning the tear that falls down through it.

“You're going with my man, Coco”. Bishop talks, with the helmet covering his head while he wears both leather gloves. 

“And my bike?” You turn to your father with more dramatism than necessary.

“It's in the van too, don' worry”. Chibs answers, hitting twice one of the doors. “Canche could need you”.

“Or us”. The Mayans president add with a soft smile on his lips.

Things starts to change, when you're conscious that you will continue working with the charters even if yours isn't present. So, at least, it's not gonna be that bad as you thought. 

“I'm sorry 'I pointed you with my gun”.

“What I can expect from Chibs' daughter? It would have scared me more if you hadn't, after everything we've heard from you”. Your father chuckles because of the words of the Mayan. “Ready?”

You hug him again, taking some seconds to memorize his smell to not forget it at all.

“I love you”. You whisper, pulling him away softly, before walk to the front passenger seat of the van.

But, before the man could start the car, your father makes a last appearance, pointing with the forefinger to all the men presents there.

“If anyone of you touch my daughter, I'll cut off your cock and make you eat it”. The Mayans know that it's not a joke, so they nod agreeing.

“I've a daughter. Her name is Letti”. The mexican accent, camouflaged in the foreign language, pushes you out of your thoughts. “She's sixteen, but I think you could be fren'”. 

━━━━━━ ﹅ ━━━━━━

The sun is falling when you leave the ‘Welcome to Charming’ sign behind the van. You sigh heavily settling in your seat. The fresh air that enters by the open window makes fly some strands of your hair, supporting both arms against the door, with your chin on it, to watch out of the car the sunset on the horizon. It's gonna be hard, you know it, but at least you will have Canche visiting you every week. Maybe Oscar comes from Stockton too.

“Yea', maybe...” You say, turning for a second.

Coco turns the radio, hoping that music makes you feel better, looking for a channel without interferences. Then, you hear your favourite song, turning to the hand that is moving the calibrator. The man stares at you with curiosity, before turning up the volume. The melody continues, while you go back to your position leaving your cheek this time and closing your eyes to focus in the song.

“Hey, oh, listen what I say, oh! I got your hey, oh! Now listen what I say, oh!”

You're about to give him the silent treatment, but that only has bad points in your favor. You'll have to live and work together for the next months, so sooner or later, you're gonna have to talk him.

The first time you listened that song, you were living with your parents in Glasgow. You can remember your father singing it to you all the time, before go to Charming. So, listen to it again causes you bittersweet feelings.

“I like the Red Hot' too”. Coco says trying to be kind, while his fingers drum the steering wheel to the beat of the music. You have to say that he has a funny voice and hearing him singing sounds like a dying cat. That makes you chuckle. “Hey! What's up, mami? Don' laugh on me!”

“Sweet Jesus Christ, you're gonna make it rain”. Your laughter is loud now, capturing president attention who slows down to reach your window.

“It's everything ok, uh?” He shouts over the sound his motorbikes does.

“I hope he has a good aim, 'cause he couldn't work as singer!” You say in laughs.

“He's a veteran Marine, kid! What do you think?” Bishop accelerates to return to his place, while you turn to the driver, truly surprised. He has a triumphal smile on his face and his gaze in front.

“These motherfuckers discharged me because I used a rifle to shoot a cigar out of an officer's mouth”. He tells you. “I was three hundred meters from him”.

This is amazing and you feel the curiosity growing inside you. Curling your legs on the seat, putting around them your arms, you stare at the Mayan.

“Can you tell me about it?”

“'Bout wha'?” He asks looking at you for a second a little confused.

“About the Marine”.

He frowns, looking at you again.

“You wanna hear 'bout it?”

“I'm not asking you about the Area Fifty One”. You say with a sharp voice shrugging.

“I'm pretty sure that would be a good talk too”.

“C'mon! It's a long travel!” It almost seems like you're starting to beg, but the topic of the Navy and Marine has always interested you.

“It's weird!”

“Why?”

“Cuz' nobody has asked me 'bout it before”. He says with the same confusion you saw on him before.

“So bad is it...?”

“No, it's... cool. Pretty cool”. He replies with a slight smile on his face.

“I wanted to enlist in the British Army, but my mother said it was too dangerous for me. So, I didn't”. Your voice trembles for a second, and he realizes it.

“Sorre' 'bout your mom, Chibs told us”. He says after a moment in silent. “I killed mine”.

Your face shows a similar gesture of horror, he shrugs exaggeratedly.

“That bitch hit my daughter, and hurt her so bad. She also forced her to have a ‘bad life’, 'you know what I mean. She deserved it”. The calm with which he explains overwhelms you.

You're starting to think he hasn't had a good life. But who in their right mind would work for an MC? Not you, neither does he.

“And your mother hate you so bad that she called you ‘Coconut’?” You try to finish the tension installed inside the van with somewhat bad joke.

“The fuck told you that's my name?” He breaks in laughter, shaking his head, accidentally giving a flywheel. 

“Oh, shit”. Both say in unison. The charter looks back.

“My bad!” He shouts sticking his head out the window for a moment.

“Then? What's your name?”

“Johnny Cruz. And everyone calls me Coco”.

“Why?”

“We're not in that level yet, mami”. He imitates the sharp voice you used before.

“Ok, but, are you gonna tell me about the Marine?”

He sighs rolling his eyes, before showing you again his smile. So, there you are, lying on your seat stretching legs crossed on the dashboard of the van. He starts to talk, of course with the funny story of how he enlisted and all the chaos he created, compensating for it with his good aim. His voice is so calm, that if you close your eyes, you could think is one of those podcast people use to sleep; without the part of shooting, murdering, and all the bloody stuff. 

Actually, you did. You closed your eyes, opening it when the night has fallen. You yawn, putting your legs on the floor of the van.

“Sorry, I didn't sleep last night”. You apologize with flushed cheeks, rubbing your eyes.

“It's ok, mami. Te ves bonita mientras duermes”. (You look pretty while you're sleeping). He says.

“What did you say?” You ask, pretending that you don't speak spanish, but the truth is that you studied it for three years while you were living in Scotland.

“That you were drooling everything”. He lies so bad that he's a little nervous. “We're almost reaching to Santo Padre”.

“Great... Home, sweet home, isn'it?”

#mayans mc imagine #mayans x reader #mayans mc x reader #mayans mc #johnny coco cruz x reader #coco cruz x reader #here we go coconut

[queerlyloud]

Fear or the lack thereof is determined by something's sphere of influence over you personally. The reason I think all these big, dangerous animals are awesome and interesting and admirable instead of scary is pretty simple, and that is because I don't swim with them or wander around in their territories antagonizing them and therefore have given myself no reason to fear them, so I can watch documentaries about them and read books about them and look at pictures of them and talk about them and criticize or admire them, but i don't have to be scared because they cannot currently hurt me. It would probably be different if I was living with minimal safety out in the wilderness where I'd be viable prey for a brown bear or swimming around known great white hunting grounds because it was the only place I could get necessary food, but im not, so yeah, brown bears and great whites are some of my favorite things. The easiest way to remove the terror from something is to remove yourself from its scope of influence, all of which to say is that yes, the state of the United States scares the shit out of me and I depend on being in this place for survival and have no means of leaving it, so i have to be terrified all the time, because i CAN'T remove myself from beneath the control of this system or its sphere of influence/destruction, especially as someone chrinically ill who relies on consistent medical care for my literal continued existence due to what is a terminal disease when left untreated and therefore cannot just up and leave anywhere even if I wanted to, so yeah, im pretty much always afraid but i also have a reason to be, so if you plan to come to me whining about how im too political or too depressing for talking about this stuff, then fuck off, because this is my daily reality and I am allowed to be worried about it.

#mine #personal #united states politics and government #chronic illness #terminal illness #fear #anxiety #stress

[fratboykate]

www(.)nytimes(.)com/2022/03/18/health/prolonged-grief-disorder(.)html this article made me think of CFAU and Lexa's grief

I can't read it cuz FUCK the NYT paywall but it looks interesting by the title :/

At the end of last year I think it was I read about this mom who had two terminal kids that had this rare disease. She knew they were going to die young their entire lives. It wasn't unexpected or anything. They'd been preparing for it for years. And the boy finally passed away. I guess there's this thing called "Broken Heart Syndrome" or whatever. I didn't know about it. She was so heartbroken over her son's passing even though they were expecting it that she went into full-blown heart failure. Grief is so serious that it can have physical effects that intense. It sent her into heart failure. Her heart LITERALLY broke after losing her son. Like.....in the most LITERAL FUCKING SENSE.

And still, people who read CFAU are still like "why didn't she just remember she had other kids and was there for them? they deserved better!" Likeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...do y'all hear yourselves???? Grief isn't always clean and perfect???

#cfau #anonymous #answers