#surprised I know I am

[lavenderr-starrs]

Is it normal to feel like you’ve been filled with helium after working out on a treadmill

#yas lav is healthy #surprised I know I am

[egophiliac]

just thinking about hair and faces

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers #i don't THINK this counts as face horror but just in case #face horror #for your daily dose of me losing my mind over anime characters #i don't know why the hair thing surprised me so much. i think because i thought it was funny that lilia named silver after his hair color. #like ha ha lilia is hilariously bad at names how cute and silly! #oh. oh it's kind of a Thing. #anyway i am excited to see where the heck all of this stuff with silver's various dads ends up! #we still don't actually know who killed meleanor! #we still don't know literally anything about dad draconia! (dadconia? dradconia?) #we don't know what happened to the macguffin gem with its magical dad-saving powers! #(surely this will not come back to save a certain dad at a later point. of course not.) #man i was not expecting episode 7 to be all dads all the time #i mean i'm here for it but #hey remember when the highest stakes were who was gonna win the big talent show #then robots started kidnapping people and now we've just escalated from there #episode 8 our cat is going to turn into a drippy ink kaiju and we're going to have to mecha battle him to save the world or something #each member of diasomnia pilots a limb and we gattai into a giant robot dragon and hold on i gotta submit this spec script to aniplex brb

[ikayblythe]

A new transliteration of the Rain World scripts

An update to this. I am the original creator of that interpretation, and to be fair I'm a little tired of not getting proper credit for it.

The entirety of this was done by comparing the 'alphabets' to our own, and assigning phonetic values from there. The logographs were interpreted similarly, but with Mandarin 'etymology' instead. I wrote...quite a bit! About it! You can read the individual interpretations for each symbol in the doc below:

#rain world #rw #rain world art #worldbuilding #i guess??? #rw sunshower #i am honestly quite upset by the folks who used the older one letter-to-letter without acknowledging me #especially bigger rw artists #you know who you are #not to be salty but im salty about it #i wouldnt be surprised if it was shared around though so people wouldnt have known #but this isnt canon #this is my interpretation and i think i deserve acknowledgement for it! #okay rant over

[inkskinned]

i keep thinking about hobbies and how i often spill over myself to pick up new ones. i have adhd, i end up trying something for like a month and then just getting far enough in it that i move on, satisfied.

and that should be fine; but it's never fine.

i am a pretty decent artist; but i can't just make art for my dnd campaign, i should be selling dnd maps and character designs and scene setting pieces. i can't just make my friends matching earrings, i need to get an etsy and ship them internationally and take bulk orders. i make pretty good props and decorations and use them to throw my friends parties - but i should be running a party planning business and start taking paying clients and networking and putting my skills to actual use.

for some reason, i never figured out the specifics of pottery. it was a fun class and i enjoyed myself - and still, i'm embarrassed, years later, that i put in all that useless effort. everything i make has to be stunning. stellar. i should have applied myself more. maybe i'm too lazy. maybe i'm broken and selfish and needy. actually creative people would have kept going; they would be bettering themselves at every possible opportunity.

we find ourselves in this trap, even accidentally: we need to commodify our time, because it is a commodity. if we spend our efforts and our time not earning, isn't that the same thing as burning free money? and god forbid you ever take up a hobby that ends up being more expensive than you thought. you sit in your car and you look at the receipt and in your head you hear a conversation that isn't even happening - your mom or your friend or your partner all saying oh great. not this shit again. it's always something with you, and it never actually means anything.

i have realized this horrible thing, recently - i'll get excited to start a project, pick up a new hobby. and then i just... stop myself. i start thinking about the amount of time it will take, and how it'll look in my monthly budget. what if i can't even produce a good enough final product. sure, it's exciting to think about how i could make my friend her own custom dice. but i'm just polluting the earth if i don't get it right. better not bother. better not try.

restless, i get caught in the negative space. the feeling that oh god, i want to create. and that horrible sense - yeah, but i don't have the time to just put to waste.

#hobbies #writeblr #what stage of weirdness to write about hobbies on my hobby writing blog #although i know OBJECTIVELY i am a creative person #i often forget to label myself that bc i don't feel im an ARTISTIC person bc i don't do anything like that professionally #writing doesn't even feel like a hobby i think that surprises nobody for me to be like #it would be easier for me to stop . like. breathing. #which feels cheesy and trite but listen im running late for a meeting and all i really want to say is like #i couldn't even consider writing my hobby bc it makes my skin crawl bc it makes it sound like it's not important to me #bc we really devalue hobbies. like entirely. #it HAS to be a job. it must #also idk if this is clear but i personally get stuck in this space where i CANT create bc i am putting so much pressure on myself #to make it RIGHT #and im like ... idk i only have an hour #so probably shouldnt get involved in this thing

[coldbycrossfade]

MAN THAT REALLY COLORS THIS RESPONSE IN THIS CONVERSATION SO DIFFERENTLY FOR ME

#bg3 #like here my silly ass that doesn't know shit was thinking 'wow i'm actually surprised he's pretty chill with this' #JOKES ON ME I'M BOOBOO THE FOOL #IT'S P R O B A B L Y MORE LIKELY THAT HE JUST ASSUMES IT WON'T LAST AND HE HAS NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT #WOW............DAMN............GOT ME #CAUGHT ME SLIPPIN CAUSE I AM A LORE NOVICE HERE.................................... #like SURE you could ASSUME that astarion would be flippant about having multiple partners like why wouldn't the flirty one be that way righ #but no no no there's much to think about here i'm unpacking the fucking layers i can feel my mind peeling like an onion #woag mama #i'm not articulate today b/c brain fog but i hope that made any sense #and hey maybe I'M even making assumptions but calling it a 'harmless affair' just.....that hits different #astarion

[unknownvoid]

Still thinking about when I asked my father (who originally watched TOS when it was the only series) if he thought Spock and Kirk were in love and he (with out any hesitation) said “yes, absolutely”

Any way happy pride from my boomer father I guess

#star trek #spock #spirk #pride #happy pride 🌈 #james t kirk #tos #I thought I would have to elaborate or give examples #but that’s how gay they are #that my boomer father even knows what’s up #I was and still am very pleasantly surprised #star trek the original series #pride month #lgbt pride #bi pride #lgbtqia #lgbtq community

[watchingwisteria]

im so sorry i get it now i really do, the gay angels have me shaking screaming crying at all hours of the day and night, they mean everything to me i am literally thinking about them all the time and what it would mean to love someone steadily and silently through eternity, what it would mean to love across the lines of a divine war of supposed good and evil, what it would mean to carve out a space for oneself and ones lover in no man’s land, in the grey and moral ambiguity when you were created to be black and white without blemish. god i love them so much i just

#update from the tags : posted this after watching s1 knowing the end of s2 #and i was like hm hope im not too offbase #but imagine my surprise when they literally said ‘i love this space we carved for ourselves’ #I WAS SICK #ineffable husbands #<< u dont get it. i used to see that and it meant nothing to me. now its like a knife inside me #good omens #aziracrow #crowley #aziraphale #ur girl watches good omens #experiencing full brain rot. like every song is about them somehow #im imaginging edits in my head bc i do nawt have time to make them for real #i just bought the book and i am about to devour it #lol another update #the drama in this post is so HDISJSISB but i was FEELING IT #i was GOING THROUGH IT… #and when i think abt them for too long i still am

[raeofgayshine]

Thinking again about the fact that when Eddie and Dustin finally convince Steve to play DnD with the party, all of them, but especially Eddie, quickly become exasperated with Steve who has extremely high charisma, and decides that he can fix almost any situation by flirting with whoever they were in conflict with. Especially the fucking monsters, this man is bound and determined to himself a monster boyfriend and until it happens, he will make every single person they come across fall in love with him. So naturally, this happens a lot:

Steve: I’m going to flirt with them

Eddie, exasperated: Steve, you can’t date this monster, he’s trying to kill you-

Steve: Hot.

Steve: I’ll flirt with them harder then

#ravenpuff rambles #steve harrington #eddie munson #hellfire club #stranger things #steddie #Steve is a monster fucker and this essay I will- #they actually get him interested in playing because they were showing him the different monsters and Steve kept going #‘Hot. Also Hot. Hooot. Can I date this one? Oh HOT.’ #the monsters really did it for him. (and like also it made Dustin excited and you know he loves that kid) #Eddie: I should have known inviting you to sessions would go like this but for some reason I had hope you would behave #Steve: I am behaving. I’m using my highest stat determined by Dustin and Will to my advantage. #(Also I think Dustin and Will helped Steve build his character. Eddie wanted to do it but Steve insisted it should be a surprise) #(I don’t know much about dnd so I can’t go any further but I know this bitch would want high charisma (for good reason!)) #Robin loves to sit by and watch the sessions play out and she is always encouraging Steve to flirt more #there’s a new You Rule You Suck board #this one has a lot more you rule because it turns out Steve is amazing at getting high rolls

[shittyjakeenglish]

Day 242

Page of Hope: Rise up

#upd8 left me insane. i am so unwell #god. JAKE. im sure it comes as a wold surprise but i actually rather like jake english #crazy i know #jake english #dirk strider #brain ghost dirk #homestuck #day 242 #oh shit forgor #dirkjake

[im-smart-i-swear]

coming back home.

@barrenclan

#patfw #patfw fanart #patfw spoilers #rainhaze #THE NEW ISSUE. IT SURE WAS AN ISSUE HUH. I AM NORMAL. SO NORMAL IN FACT #THAT I REDREW A PANEL OF THE COMIC IN MS PAINT #i need someone to put this horrid beast down already. he needs to DIE i am not joking. euthanise him. please. #he is soooo fascinating. #i CANT get over his expression in this panel. WHAT IS WRONG WITH HIM #hes smiling .is it a genuine smile? is he smiling bc he knows how this is going to go and all he can do is laugh now? #why. why why why the smile. at first he looks shocked or surprised or terrified but THEN it turns into this playful soft grin. as if full o #nostalgia. or maybe grief. or maybe joy. he looks like he knows something we dont. #did he accept that his family is going to get wiped out (HIS FAULT HE KILLED HER HE RIPPED HER THROAT OUT) and is just happy he got to see #them one last time? #this is so weird. before killing asphodel he was so terrified of meeting them. of facing his past and acknowledging what he became. #is him smiling a symbol of him giving up? becoming part of defiance? hes not running away anymore. he doesnt have to. #jesus. #my art #wanted to make him look as fucked up as i could. i hope he looks like a corpse or perhaps a starved dog to you

[wasabi-gumdrop]

thinking about modern au Kabru

ivy league college student, probably studying law and political science on a full scholarship. first time living away from Milsiril so he has to promise her, yes mom i’ll call you at least four times a week, no mom i don’t need your amex black card, yes mom the normal credit card is fine i need to learn how to budget like a Normal Person (it has a limit of $20k — that’s not normal Kabru).

Milsiril insists for a long time that she’ll just get him a house off campus so he can have his own space (aka a place she can drop by anytime and possibly live a few months out of the year just to be close to him) but Kabru puts his foot down and tells her the best way he’s gonna make friends is by living with other students (bye mom).

his floor in the coed dorms is the party floor and he always makes sure to invite everybody (his nightmare is accidentally leaving anyone out and having them think that he doesn’t like them). somehow it’s always a good time, everyone leaves with more friends than they came with, it never gets totally out of control, and plenty of girls who are interested in him (and a lot of guys too tbh) bring tons of baked treats so there’s always free food. Kabru is the RA’s favourite person to have in the building (even though Kabru himself is messy but most of the people he’s friends with are nice and clean up after themselves).

he has a porsche (Milsiril gift for his 16th bday) but he’s adamant about not driving it unless he absolutely has to (because he doesn’t wanna look like a douche). BUT he never says no when his friends ask for rides (so he ends up driving all the time anyway). he actually contemplates selling the porsche and going for a more practical car but Mickbell is like ‘dude you are not taking this away from me.’ Kabru sighs and decides to keep it because his friends (Mickbell) like being chauffeured around in a fancy convertible (Rin, Holm, and Dia don’t care, they’re just glad they don’t have to walk to the grocery store).

he’s probably on a casual texting basis with most of his professors and you know he’s going to all their office hours, grabbing beer with them just to keep chatting about life outside of school. and that’s how he winds up in some super secret faculty group chat where he’s now privy to all the college administration gossip.

Kabru is elected for student council during his freshman year and he’s probably the favourite to be sc president one day.

he doesn’t really date (gets too in his head about how he doesn’t wanna ruin any friendships) but he does hang out one on one with a lot of girls and treats them all really well. he probably goes so far out of his way to be platonic that he flies a little too close to the ‘Just Like One of the Girlies’ sun, he kinda forgets that most people interpret it as flirting coming from him. which leads to a few awkward conversations. people feeling led on, a few angry jealous boyfriends, scathing dms about him being a girl stealing homewrecker.

it’s such a nightmare for him and he needs it to end right now. so he begs Rin to ‘date’ him for a week or two and then publicly dump him just so the entire student body gets the message that he is Just A Friend.

Rin stares at him for a few seconds. then she laughs. she laughs and laughs. she laughs for a crazy long time. and then eventually she goes, ‘wow you’re an asshole, Kabru. no i won’t be your fake girlfriend. you’re gonna suffer and i’m going to enjoy it.’

and that’s when Kabru has a moment of enlightenment. ok yeah. asking for that is probably really selfish and mean. maybe he needs to think about girls’ feelings more and that’s maybe more important than his deep seated need to be liked, and when has Rin ever been wrong about anything.

he apologizes. and so begins one of the more serious talks he’s ever had with Rin about being okay with not being liked.

he thinks he can really turn over a new leaf. the whole ‘not worrying about what other people think’ thing goes pretty well — up until Kabru meets the aloof professor for his Monsters and Myths class who keeps forgetting and mispronouncing his name.

Kabru has never needed someone to like him So Bad, he needs Prof. Touden to like him as a matter of life and death, and he’s willing to look stupid for it (fails a midterm on purpose to justify begging for one on one tutoring)

#wow if you made it to the end of this post here’s some surprise labru #kabru says fuck my gpa i need this white boy to like me #i am plagued by demons (labru professor/student situationship) #dungeon meshi modern au #ok but the Kabru Milsiril dynamic is my new favourite chew toy #especially them in a modern setting #all of the lavish gifts and expensive lifestyle that Milsiril would want Kabru to have #perhaps even as a way of depending on her forever (love to an unhealthy degree) #but Kabru is more interested in people than material things #so perhaps he’s a little out of touch financially (thinks a jug of milk costs $12) #but he’s still very much socially aware #enough to know that he can’t just be another annoying trust fund kid with a dumb car and designer clothes and zero fucks about academics #so his social and academic excellence is probably in large part overcompensation for his privileged upbringing #and even the thought of someone not liking him gives him stomach cramps LOL #kabru my love you will always be famous #kabru of utaya #kabru #wasabi rambles #labru #dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon

[ialwaysknewyouwerepunk]

the loneliness and sadness that creeps into you in a way that only growing up queer can cause. your parents can accept you and still make you feel like an outsider. your parents can love you and still reject parts of you. that old-fashioned kind of love where they think trying to mold you, make you tough, is better for you. or that quiet status quo where you just don't talk. and where everyone is accepted, though some are more than others. generations and generations it's just been easier to let it slide. to let it be. not cause a fuss. but then we sit there with a knot in our chests all our lives wondering how it got there

#this is about #all of us strangers #ofc your experience of a piece of media is molded by your own perspective #and i have been thinking a lot about growing up queer and how it still fucking sucked #for me. ten. twenty years ago. fuck it even five years ago #it still sometimes sucks #because i was raised without any queer representation around me #i was trained to be straight and to desire straightness #and anything remotely queer was mocked and bullied and judged #i saw it done by others and done to others so much that it's hardly surprising i did everything i could to Not be that #and the fact that i had to grow up that way #and that i still wouldn't feel at ease bringing a partner to a family event #makes my heart ache so much #i am often on my own and going home doesn't bring me comfort #it's like harry describes #it's just how it went #my parents didn't mean to make it like that #my mom even thinks it's sad #but she doesn't understand how it came to be #and i don't know if i can turn it around #adam's imaginings of how his parents envelop him with love and acceptance in the end #was a dream #but a painful one #a dream where your parents suddenly say all the right things #and for him they only did so bc they're dead and he could imagine whatever he wanted #/and still/ he imagined his mom rejecting his sexuality at first #literally so disgusted she can't drink her tea #oooooofofffffff....... #i need to think some more #my posts

[egophiliac]

I love the idea of teenage Malleus hating his new baby brother Silver but slowly falling for him

words cannot express how much I adore that Mal's reaction to seeing a human baby for the first time was "the fuck is this. why does it look like that. gross." (then he immediately got stuck on babysitting duty and the rest is history)

I am SUCH a sucker for that trope of "non-humans being fascinated by normal human behavior", so between that and all the delicious angst going on I was eating VERY well. >:) Malleus being so impressed that two-year-old Silver can walk, because it took him twenty years to stand on two legs! Lilia barging in on the Zigvolts at 2 AM being like "he won't stop crying what do I do"! Lilia trying to feed Silver rats and Malleus being like "...please just stick with what the books say to feed it"! it is all so. chef's kiss.

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers #(this is based on a very dumb in-joke and i apologize) #i promise i will (eventually) stop spamposting i am just still floating in a river of sheer delight from this update #god. the spoon scene is going to live in my brain forever #malleus having to be the one to teach sebek and silver basic magic because lilia was SO bad at explaining it 😭 #also like...i had assumed mal didn't know who silver really is so it wasn't a surprise when lilia straight-up lied to his face about it #but now i can just SEE it hovering there on the horizon as a thing they're probably going to have to deal with at some point #like 'malleus doesn't know' is no longer a sort of general observation/theory and is instead now a very relevant Problem #ohohoho. splendid. things are going to get SO bad and i am going to be here clapping my stupid little hands at it all

[crabsnpersimmons]

CRAB IS YOUR MOON OKAY WITH HUGS?

PLEASE THIS GUYS NEED SOME AFFECTION

LET ME JUST-

GHHHHHH-/pos

#fnaf moon #Moon New Do Same You AU #fnaf dca #dca fandom #mutual shenanigans #other people's art #crab art #traditional art #Moon likes hugs #but he's very particular about them #he prefers hugs around his shoulders or his waist #he does not like being hugged from behind #he does not like being hugged by surprise #he's a bit skittish #like a cat #you have to learn his habits #and sometimes just wait for him to come to you #you know i am up to No GoodTM when i draw extreme close ups of Moon and his back #i also don't know what possessed me to do this in watercolours #but... i'm okay with the final look #i'm just very rusty #and i remembered why the last time i painted in watercolour i went into an artblock #it really do be a “trust the process” kinda deal #also for people who saw the wip #haHA you thought this was about moon ass but it was actually MOON ANGST #MOON ANGST FRIDAY #i always post my moon angst on friday it seems

[cocogum]

What do y’all have against Amalia, man???

First it’s Sipho who’s telling her how he’s genuinely confused that Yugo can love her and now it’s Qilby?? (even tho he at least admitted she was pretty unlike that ugly lizard Sipho). Literally what is going on??

Since when did people around Yugo think it was weird for him to like sassy flowers???

#the similarities are weird… #sipho is so ugly wth #i’m actually surprised Qilby had more decency than freaking Sipho #but then again anyone would beat an ugly ass lizard’s words #do I wanna repeatedly punch Sipho in the face? maybe #am i bashing on Sipho for being an asshole? maybe #when the guy who started a whole war and caused the death of thousands of his people can admit a person’s beauty then you know u suck shit #amalia stan #wakfu #krosmoz #ankama #wakfu amalia #wakfu amalia sheran sharm #amalia sheran sharm #amalia sheran sharm wakfu #amalia wakfu #wakfu qilby #qilby wakfu #qilby #wakfu sipho #sipho wakfu #sipho #wakfu season 4 #wakfu s4 #wakfu season 3 #wakfu s3

[subtle-as-an-earthquake]

"Fuckin' summertime makes promises..." [x]

#probably not very surprising but #i am OBSESSED with this performance #it's on my mind every second of every day and night #he sounded brilliant #and he looked utterly utterly edible #he thought so too #i just can't get enough of these moments where he's clearly FEELING himself you know? #also the rolled up jeans + tanktop + plimsolls + neckerchief/headscarf = 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 #not to mentions THIGHS and ARMS i mean was that even legal #i highly doubt it tbh #alex turner #tlsp #the last shadow puppets #eycte #eycte tour #my gifs