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#sundrop x gn reader
ficmachine · 1 year
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Brain go brrr so:
Imagine Moon picking on you and then promptly realising you're not enjoying it bc you've had a very shitty day.
Imagine Moon going out of his way and stepping out of his comfort zone to make sure you're okay- emotionally, mentally AND physically.
Imagine Moon doing their damn hardest to hold you and make you feel loved, despite of their struggle with physical contact and the memories that come with it.
Imagine being carried all the way through the theatre because Moony knows you don't handle heights but he wants you to rest somewhere somewhat comfortable regardless (the mattress they've dragged out few months ago hasn't been used by either of them up until this point)
Imagine Sunny waking up next to you, in his and Moon's shared room, with absolutely no context as to what happened the night before.
Imagine Sun taking care of you and being beyond bashful, thinking unspoken things happened between you and Moon, even if its unlike them to share something like that with Sun.
Imagine the misunderstanding that comes with you approaching and asking Sunny what's wrong, and them fully confessing Moon has blocked them out of the previous night's events.
Imagine Sun willing to all up and die as you explain that all you did was smooch and cuddle with his night counterpart, and that you've very much enjoyed it.
Imagine Sunny pausing, hesitating, hearing what he just heard. Then, ever so shyly asking if they, too, can kiss you on the lips.
Imagine realising Sunny is so fond of kissing he nuzzles his faceplate to you and tries to (very casually) smooch you, hoping to get some kisses back in return.
Imagine loving both of them so much despite the communication troubles the two deal with. But knowing fully well despite their differences they would never exchange you for another.
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pluck-heartstrings · 1 month
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I’m drawing a little smooching practice page and I think this one is my favourite so far.
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sundrop-writes · 4 months
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Emergency Contact
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Jason Todd x Gender Neutral Reader
You choke on your words, but you swallow them faster.
Just want you to be my Emergency Contact.
Summary:
After Jason miraculously comes home from his brush with Deathstroke, you’re both feeling it in very different ways. You have an unexpected physical wound from the battle, and he has many (very expected) emotional wounds. You help each other heal. Even if it’s very stubborn on both your parts.
Jason Todd x GN!Powered!Reader. Enemies/FWB to Lovers. Angst and Hurt/Comfort. (Slight Smut). Set during Season 2, Episode 5.
Word Count: 10,400
DC Titans Masterlist | AO3 Link
THIS IS A RE-POST. This is a fic from my old blog (a blog that was shadowbanned, forcing me to move). This fic is not stolen, it is completely mine, and I am just re-posting it to help people find my new blog, and to make my masterlist complete when I post new fics for this fandom.
Detailed warnings and author’s notes below the cut.
...
Warnings: general emotional angst, Jason has a self deprecating inner dialogue, (kind of) enemies to lovers - more like annoyances to fuck buddies to lovers, friends with benefits to lovers, the reader and Jason have a bantering/argumentative nature to their relationship, the reader is meant to be 100% gender neutral (the reader is never referred to in the third person, so there is no need to use they/them pronouns, but the reader is not called she/her or he/him), Jason calls the reader ‘babe’ (imo, a completely gender neutral term and he would call anybody that), mentions of alcohol (Jason drinking a beer), the reader character has ice powers (not entirely relevant to the plot but I couldn’t help myself lmao).
sexual themes throughout, mentions of sexting (no detailed descriptions), mentions of sexting in public, mentions of the reader character sending nudes to Jason (no detailed descriptions of the photos), one scene with detailed smut (but it is not the primary focus of the fic), the reader’s genitals are not described in any specific way, some dirty talk, Jason is more dominant and the reader is more submissive, penetrative sex, Jason is annoying even during sex, Jason has a pain kink (even when he’s a dom, he’s a painslut, I don’t make the rules), scratching/marking (Jason receiving), slight humiliation kink.
mentions of canon level violence, mentions of kidnapping (in alignment with canon), mentions of Jason being beaten by Deathstroke, mentions of Jason’s near-death experience (being dropped off the building), gun violence, the reader is injured - has a bullet wound/bullet fragment in their stomach, mentions of blood, descriptions of first-aid, mentions of puss from an infected wound (theoretically, not something that happens in the fic). That should be everything.
A/N: The title for the fic comes from a song by Pierce the Veil of the same name. It’s a newer song, and it’s one that I absolutely went to when looking for a title for this fic. The concept of becoming someone’s emergency contact is about upgrading the relationship from casual to much more serious, and just the whole song, and specific lyrics in it suit this fic so well. I highly recommend listening to it paired with this fic.
This was based on a request from my old blog, but obvi I don’t have that ask anymore - the request was about Jason getting shot and having his wound attended to by the reader, but I changed it to the reader getting shot cause I thought that was more interesting and less common. If the person who made that request sees this and finds my new blog, I hope you enjoy it! And in general, I hope everyone who reads this enjoys it.
This is another re-post from my old blog, and I do have a sequel for it in my drafts, which I am not actively working on. And before I post the sequel, I do plan on tweaking this and revamping it a little, but I figured I would repost this for now just to have the masterlist complete on this blog.
...
If asked, you would be hard pressed to explain your relationship with Jason Todd. 
The best way you could describe it would probably be - friends with benefits? 
But most of the time, the two of you weren’t even friends. You weren’t the type to hang out casually, or spend time alone together if it didn’t involve ripping each other’s clothes off. 
If you ever exchanged secrets or those precious bits of your most raw selves, it was by mistake. It was through sarcasm, or coming off the tired lips of someone who had just been exhausted by a few orgasms. The two of you knew each other well, quite literally inside and out. But you always made a deep, concerted effort to hold each other at arm’s length. And maybe that’s part of what all the snark and harsh words were for. 
It wasn’t all arguing. You were friendly. You could be civil, at the very least. 
Right from the moment you had first met Jason, you had found him to be so damn annoying, a shitstain on the earth - yet, someone you couldn’t stay away from. The line between flirtatious banter and a truly grinding argument was always so thin with the two of you. 
… 
You hadn’t expected that your life would be truly changed when you walked into that safehouse in Chicago that day. You truly thought nothing of him when his eyes landed on you - in those moments, a completely anonymous stranger, raking his eyes over you like you were a piece of meat. It was a gaze that immediately made you feel naked, something that made you want to smack him. You told yourself it was because he was being a pervert, not because of the heat that curled in your gut at feeling so intensely desired by him. 
He had been sitting on the couch sipping a beer like he owned the place, his thighs spread wide in a way you immediately decided was arrogant and annoying rather than hot - showing off his muscle tone as if it was trying to break through his jeans. Definitely annoying. Definitely the stance of a fuckboy trying to look bigger and badder than he was. He definitely was not attractive. 
When Dick led you, Rachel, Gar, and Kory further into the condo that seemed far too conspicuous to be a safehouse, the stranger you would later come to know as Jason quickly spoke up. 
“Who are your friends?” He asked. 
As he rose from the couch, his eyes lingered on you. Though his words seemed more out of curiosity, you couldn’t help but feel that bite of something more salacious lingering in his voice. 
It caused you to scoff and roll your eyes. 
“Not important.” Dick declared, his voice snippy. He was clearly annoyed with this new guy, and you could tell that your perceptions of him were definitely not ill-informed. 
“Who’s he?” Kory asked, going for the obvious question. 
“Not important.” Dick parroted out the words again, sounding much shorter with his patience. 
“Anybody want a brew?” Jason asked, motioning with the beer bottle in his hand. 
“Brew?” You twisted your eyebrows with disgust, staring him down as you commented on his odd choice of slang. 
He didn’t get to reply, as you were trampled over by Gar’s enthusiastic voice in your ear. 
“I do!” He said, raising his hand with excitement. 
“No, you don’t.” You quickly told him, reaching out to grab his hand and put it back down. “It’s disgusting.” 
You had a grand suspicion that Gar had never drank beer before, and he had no idea what he was truly asking for. Rather, he was simply taking advantage of trying new things because Dick and Kory were incredibly slack parental figures and he was away from home for the first time. 
“No, no one wants a brew.” Dick sighed, shaking his head. He threw Jason a small glare and you resisted the urge to laugh. 
“That can’t be Adamson.” Kory said, motioning toward Jason. 
This left you confused. But you didn’t question it. 
“He’s not Adamson. Adamson’s in the bathroom. Unconscious.” Dick explained. 
“Hi, I’m Rachel.” Rachel told Jason, offering him a sweet smile - being her usual sweet self. 
“Jason.” He introduced himself, in that moment, finally giving you a name to that obnoxious face. 
“I’m Gar!” Gar said with a grin, to which Jason nodded. 
Jason caught you glaring at him, and looked you up and down again, as if trying to willfully tear off your clothes with his eyes. It made your skin itch with heat and you would forever deny that it was a feeling you liked. 
“What can I call you, babe?” He asked, his voice entirely slimy, the kind of tone he would have used to recite cheesy lines to Tinder dates, you were entirely sure of. 
Before you could come up with some clever reply, Dick sighed in frustration and started balking again. 
“Okay, who we all are doesn’t matter right now.” He pressed, his neck so entirely tense that veins began to pop from the skin. “Can we just chill out, relax, sit on the couch and watch TV or something?” 
It seemed that he wouldn’t get his wish. 
Gar quickly charged around the table, finding something else to get strung up about. 
“Yo, when did you get another one?” He asked, putting his hands on both of the expensive cases on the long dining table - a copy identical to the one you knew to be containing Dick’s Robin outfit. 
It made you curious, and the answer that followed certainly surprised you. 
“That one’s mine.” Jason said, his chest literally puffing out with pride as he stated the fact. 
“No way.” You scoffed. 
“Yes way.” He quickly argued back, the whole exchange sounding entirely juvenile.
“This one’s yours? Wait, you’re Robin too?” Gar quickly put the pieces together. 
“I thought you were Robin?” Rachel commented, tilting her head toward Dick with curiosity. 
“I am.” Dick said firmly. 
“He was.” Jason corrected, a cocky smirk forming across his lips. 
“Batman really lowered the height requirement, huh.” You said. 
The words flew from your mouth before you could stop them, seeing as it was likely the only thing you could nitpick about Jason’s appearance. Between his stunning sharp jaw, his piercing blue eyes, his oddly appealing wild hair, his muscle tone being somehow visible beneath his baggy clothing - all of it made you equally frustrated and annoyed with him, and your baser urges couldn’t resist the low-hanging fruit. 
You felt victory and a slight pang of guilt when Jason deflated because of your comment, shrinking back into himself at your words. 
He didn’t have anything to say in return, he simply sipped his beer. 
“Wait, how many Robins are there?” Gar said, beginning to excitedly ramble at the thought. “Are there a lot? Cause I would love to-” 
“Okay, quiet.” Kory cut him off, clearly becoming annoyed with all of this dancing around the point as much as Dick was. “Sit.” 
Her words were firm, and you couldn’t help but to listen. You found yourself collapsing to sit on the couch while Rachel and Gar took seats at the dining table. Jason continued to linger in the middle of the room, staring at Kory and Dick as their frustration filled the air. 
“Bathroom.” Kory told Dick, and then they left to deal with whoever - or whatever - Adamson was. 
Jason sighed and took a seat beside you. When his eyes fell on you, you set your jaw and glared at him. You didn’t give away a single ounce of the heat you were feeling as his eyes locked with yours. 
“Even if I am the shorter Robin, I can assure you that everything else about me is… very long.” He lowered his voice and whispered those last words, crowding into your personal space as he did so. 
It sent shivers down your spine, his silken voice making the words sound too tempting. Even if you twisted your face and said ‘gross!’ causing him to dissolve into laughter, you didn’t make an effort to move away from him or put any space between your two bodies on the very large couch. You told yourself it was because you were tired from a very long day of travel, not because you were enjoying the smell of his strangely expensive cologne from this close by. 
His grin was still entirely smug, and you couldn’t stand it. 
When he raised the beer bottle up to his mouth again, you reached over and put a hand on his forearm, forcefully dragging his arm down as you made a snide comment. 
“That shit is disgusting, why the hell do you drink it?” You asked. 
You found your face drifting toward his again and if asked, you would say it was a form of intimidation - not that you were being drawn in by an unconscious attraction to him. 
“Because I can.” He replied, just as snide as he slipped your grip and sipped on the drink. 
You mocked his words in an entirely childish voice, and then you raised a single finger up to it and skimmed along the neck of the bottle. It took only a single moment of concentration with your skilled powers to freeze the beer inside solid. He thought he felt an extra chill coming off his hand, but convinced himself that he imagined it. But when he kept it tilted and nothing came out to meet his lips, he shook it and then stuck an inquiring eye inside the bottle. 
When he saw that it was completely frozen, he looked over and saw you grinning, and little did you know - that was the moment he became completely taken with you. You were one of the most annoying people he had ever met, and he found himself so intensely attracted to you. 
Even if it was getting under your skin by arguing with you or fucking your brains out, he knew in that moment - he had to get inside you and drive you insane the same way that he knew you would for him. 
… 
When Dick left to go check on his old circus friend Clay, Jason winked at you and said ‘don’t miss me too much’. You made a show of putting a finger near your mouth and audibly gagging. 
Later that night, when Jason didn’t return, you hated the curl of disappointment that panged in your stomach. You wanted to hit yourself for staring at the door, waiting for the second Robin to come in behind Dick. 
You hated yourself even more for replying to Jason’s texts. 
Apparently he had taken your phone out of your jacket pocket when you went to the bathroom (not to see Adamson - a different bathroom, to pee). And he had put himself in your contacts as ‘Hot Guy’. He had also sent himself a text from your phone that read ‘omg Jason you’re so hot, will you fuck me?’. And then replied to it from his own phone with a picture of his cock. 
Unfortunately, the only thing you could mock about the picture was poor lighting. 
When you told him as much, he quickly remedied that with several more pictures - ones with better lighting. He sent a video with very distinct audio. You would deny that you rushed to put your headphones in to listen to it while you sat on the train with Kory and Gar. You would deny that it drove a hard, hot pain between your thighs. 
You dug through a folder and sent some pictures of your own. You told yourself it was to prove to him that you were too good for him - to show off something he could never actually have. To tease him. 
You would deny that you loved the compliments he gave you, that you ate up the affection like a plant lovingly soaking up the sun. 
When you were sexting him, you had no clue that you were ever going to see him again. It was almost mindless, something for a dopamine hit to distract yourself from all the chaos going on around you. You weren’t doing it because you actually liked Jason. You didn’t have any real attractions toward him, or any real plans to carry out all of the bold things you said in those messages. 
You had no clue that you’d end up living together. 
When you did find out that Dick would be taking Jason into the newly reopened Titans Tower along with you, Gar, and Rachel, you didn’t make a big deal of it in your mind. When Jason made flirtatious remarks toward you in person, you brushed him off. You put up a wall. 
You told yourself that he was nothing more than a cocky, shallow guy who would use you for sex and then throw you away - something you could never actually build a proper relationship with. And if you were supposed to live together, be some kind of team like Dick expected you to be, then you couldn’t be messy. You couldn’t get emotional. 
You had no clue that on one of those first nights living together, your self assured discipline not to give into your lust for him would break like a wafer cookie, and you would be in his bed faster than a sea turtle running into ocean. 
… 
“Fuck, babe, you feel so good on my cock.” Jason grunted, his face buried in your neck as he thrusted deep inside of you. The loud squelch of artificial wetness coming from between your thighs as he worked his hips, working you open with a needy, demanding pace. “Bet you love this cock, huh? Tell me how fuckin’ much you love it.” 
“Shut up.” 
The words came from your throat as a weak whimper, much less powerful than you had intended. 
You didn’t want to give him any more power than he already held over you - he had you weak and willing on his cock, something you would have never admitted could be true until it was happening in these moments. 
Though you would never admit it aloud, you loved the way he handled you. Having you pinned against the bed with his fingers digging into the flesh of your hips, having you breathless and moaning as he fucked into you with fast, obviously skilled strokes. Your nails cut into the flesh of his back, and he let out a low rumble from his gut as the sharp sting sent a wave of pleasure through him. 
You hated the twinge of lustful embarrassment that curled in your gut when he chuckled at your words. 
“Oh, you want me to shut up?” He asked, slightly breathless from the act himself, moving one hand beside your head to raise himself up slightly to look in your eyes. 
He was sweaty, disheveled, his hair a mess, his muscles taught with the effort as he continued to pound into you. You hated that you had imagined him much like this before, and that this outlived all of your fantasies. 
“Yes.” You fired back. “Just shut up and fuck me.” 
He bit his lip - something you didn’t know was him trying to hold back his orgasm, so utterly turned on by your bratty defiance, the twinge of a whimper in your voice as you said those words. 
“You weren’t tellin’ me to shut up when I was texting you.” 
He said, all hot breath fanning across your chin, his hips spearing forward in sharp, hard hits that made your skin smack loudly together. It made you work hard to suppress moans deep in your chest in a way that was painful, like venom inside your lungs. You wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of your sounds, of knowing just how good he was fucking you - even if he could see it written all over your pleasure twisted face. 
“You only begged for more when I was tellin’ you how I was gonna lay you on my bed. Take you apart… make you scream my name.” 
He reached his other hand from your hip to the point where you were joined. He began touching that tender place, making sharp, vicious strokes that were almost vengeful. Tears easily gathered in your eyes and he let out another chuckle when you choked on a deep, pleasurable wail. 
“Tell me, how many times did you touch yourself reading what I wrote?” 
He asked, leaning down to whisper the words right in your ear. 
“How many times did you cum thinking about me?” 
“I didn’t.” You choked out, digging your nails deeper into the skin of his back, causing him to grunt as the pain mixed with the pleasure flowing through him. 
“Sure, babe.” He smirked down at you, turning that look into something absolutely pavlovian that would forever make you feel his cock deep inside of you when you saw it, rather than feeling annoyed. 
Maybe from that point on, it was a bit of both. 
In an effort to shut him up, you reached up and claimed his lips. It was supposed to be a kiss, but it was mostly teeth. When you bit down on his bottom lip, snarling, he tasted blood and the way he moaned at the pain was absolutely unmistakable. It was something you remembered and used against him many times after that. 
… 
You wouldn’t allow yourself any room for self hatred when it came to that break in your self control. When it became an ongoing thing, you spun it as positive in your mind. 
It was just sexual release. You and Jason both needed it. It paired well with intense training and the heavy studying that Dick made you do. It lowered your stress levels a lot, and it helped you get through the day. 
The more time you spent around Jason, the more you got to know him, and the more you came to realize that he was nowhere near shallow. You easily saw that he was caring, deep, complex, troubled. The more time passed, you found yourself falling for him and the more you deeply denied it. Because it was just sex. 
Things were good between the two of you, and you knew that if you added anything else to the mix - any complicated, mushy feelings - you would fuck it up. 
You were especially reminded of this - how important it was not to fuck things up - just a day or so before every other force aside from you railed Titans Tower and began royally fucking things up. 
… 
It was a morning just like any other at Titans Tower. It was delightfully quiet - even though Dick demanded that everyone get up at ungodly early hours to begin training, you had somehow managed to wake up before everyone else and you were enjoying the peace it brought you. 
When you got up to see that Jason was already in the kitchen, standing at the counter as he munched on a bowl of cereal, you wanted to scorn the idea that your peace would be interrupted. But instead, you found yourself willfully suppressing a smile. 
You yawned and walked over to the counter, grabbing a bowl from one of the cupboards, thinking that cereal was just the right idea on his part. A deep frown cut through your face when you poured out the rest of the cereal box he had left on the counter, and a very measly amount fell into your bowl. 
“What kind of asshole only leaves three fucking cornflakes in the bottom of the box?” You scoffed, causing him to chuckle. 
“Learn to count, babe.” He told you, speaking with his mouth half-full. “That’s more than three.” 
You rolled your eyes. You were likely exaggerating - but still, it seemed rude to you to leave such a small portion, barely a handful, in the bottom of the box. 
“Or did I make you cum so hard last night that I knocked the common sense out of your head?” He added on, throwing you that signature smirk that made heat bloom between your thighs. 
You let out a sarcastic snort, giving him a purposefully disgusted grimace as you lifted the bowl up and dumped the remaining cereal into his portion instead. 
“You might as well take these.” You told him. “And don’t flatter yourself, you’re not that good.” 
You moved behind them, distracting yourself from the conversation by making a cup of coffee. 
“Oh really?” He perked up, rising to his full height, pure mischief in his voice. “It didn’t sound like it last night.” 
Much to your horror, he then began imitating your moans. 
“‘Oh, Jason! Oh, fuck me! More!’” 
It was a cartoonish, pornographic imitation, something he likely wouldn’t have done if the others were anywhere within earshot. Oddly enough, even though your relationship was casual, you still kept it guarded and private, as though it were some precious secret that needed to be kept from the others. 
“‘Jason, please, your dick is the best! Oh, make me cum!’” 
But that was the farthest thing from your mind as embarrassment curled in your stomach, the reaction he likely wanted to draw out of you. You hated that you didn’t truly know if it was accurate or not, because sometimes - yes, he did fuck your brains out and make you completely mindless on his cock. 
But you would never admit that he was right. 
“Shut up.” You sighed, causing him to dissolve into laughter, feeling as though he had won. 
But you wouldn’t simply leave it at that. 
Instead, as you pushed the button on the machine and your coffee began to drip, you turned around and gently placed your fingers on the side of his cereal bowl. You froze all the milk inside of it solid, making it into one large frozen chunk with the spoon stuck inside when he wasn’t looking - distracted, staring at your face, looking for any trace of the reaction that he had drawn out of you. 
You just glared, and he smirked once more. 
When he picked up the spoon again and went to take another bite, the entire bowl came with it. He sighed in defeat when he realized what you had done. 
“You know, it’s so damn annoying when you do that.” He sighed. 
“I know.” You grinned at him. 
He couldn’t help the butterflies that fluttered in his stomach at this. He resisted the urge to grab you by the sides of your head and steal the grin of your mouth with his own. He told you that it was out of annoyance, and not affection. He told himself those lines were most definitely not blurred when it came to you. 
… 
Confessing your feelings to Jason would not have been your choice. 
Given the choice, you would have let your feelings quietly live and die inside of you. You would have just kept Jason as a friend. You would have even dropped the amazing sex if it meant staying on good terms with him. 
But the stakes rose pretty quickly, and things were taken out of your hands. The choice was stolen from you and Jason entirely against your will. 
When you found out he was missing, supposedly kidnapped by Doctor Light on the heels of some misguided plan - something inside of you shattered. Up until that moment, if you thought it was just a stupid crush, or an infatuation inside of you that would easily fade with time - you quickly found out that you were wrong. 
You went through the stages of grief like a rocket. 
Denial. Staring at the door, waiting for him to walk inside at any moment. Just like you had back at the safehouse.
Anger. Being so pissed at Dick at the other older Titans that you could barely breathe. How had they let this happen to him? How could they make him feel so inadequate that he felt the need to go out on his own, half-cocked, clearly doing something in the name of looking for their approval? 
Bargaining. You would have traded places with him. You would have been the one, alone and scared and stranded if it meant that he got to be at home safe. You would have gone with him to carry out the stupid plan if he had only asked. Why hadn’t he asked you? 
Depression. You wept in your room, hands clasped over your face, letting out chest-shaking sobs as you thought of the possibility of him never returning home again. You realized the possibility of him dying was very real and it made your lungs burn. 
And then finally - Acceptance. You finally accepted that your feelings for him were something bigger, and if it meant that you were the only person in the Tower who truly cared about him (probably aside from Gar) - the only person who didn’t just see him as a pawn to be used against Deathstroke - then you had to do something about it. 
So you laid out your love for Jason. You put it all on the line for him. You accidentally confessed to him, showed your feelings in a gesture so quiet it screamed. 
You knew that for someone who stepped up to become Robin, someone who scorned cops for pummeling down on the innocent when they were supposed to be protectors - stepping up to try and save his life meant a love bigger than anything else you could have done. 
And he was terrified of it. There was a big justice in your love for him. And to him, there was an even bigger justice in giving you an out to escape it - to escape loving him.  
… 
Hectic. 
That was easily how you would describe the last few days at Titans Tower. 
Between the unexpected arrival of Rose - Dick taking on another stray because, like Rachel said, he couldn’t resist a bird with a broken wing. Finding out that she was related to one of the deadliest men on earth that the Titans apparently had previous history with. And then Jason going off on his own without telling you, some botched hostage trade, and the group picking up yet another stray - a strange boy who had saved Jason’s life. It was all a blur of hectic chaos that had you snapping your neck to keep up. 
Sleep was scarce and you couldn’t remember the last time you’d had a proper meal. 
But you weren’t truly worried about any of that. 
Dust had been kicked up around your life, and you couldn’t wait for it to settle before you made your next important decision. 
Even though the wounds were still tender, you knew that things were safe for now, and your number one concern was Jason. 
The minute he had gotten in the door, even though he was slightly hobbled and clearly sore from whatever Deathstroke had done to him, he rushed out of your sight. He was clearly eager to get away from everyone like a wounded animal sulking away to lick his wounds in peace. And when you had chased him, ignoring a nagging pain in your own side from the fight, he had slammed his bedroom door in your face, entirely uncaring of the fact that you called out his name, concerned for him. 
The rest of the group was distracted with Conner - not knowing what he had been shot with or how to fix it. You hated it, but in the eyes of the group, yet again, Jason and any of his problems fell to the back burner. 
After you had taken a short shower and changed your clothes, you found yourself here. Standing in front of Jason’s closed bedroom door, hoping not to face another cold rejection. 
You wondered if he would be sleeping, wondered if you should interrupt his peace. But you knew that sleep was unlikely after everything that had happened. 
So you took the leap. 
You raised a fist, once again pushing down that stinging pain coming from the right side of your stomach. You reasoned that it was probably nothing more than a bruise forming there. And you knocked on the door. 
A few moments later, the door was jerked open, and Jason glared at you. 
His eyes were dull and tired, and there was a large bruise forming on the side of his mouth. Probably one of many others that you couldn’t see, from the way he had been walking earlier. He likely hadn’t been sleeping, but you had disturbed him. 
“What the hell do you want?” He grumbled out, his voice dull, lacking any true fight. 
“I wanted to check on you.” You told him, entirely honest. “I know it might seem stupid, but I wanna see how you’re doing.” 
Jason scoffed and rolled his eyes. 
He wanted to agree that - yes, it was stupid. It should have been obvious how he was doing after being kidnapped, beaten, and dropped off a building. But he was an idiot who had gotten himself thrown headfirst into that mess, thinking he could handle it. And he didn’t need to go crying to you about how badly he had fucked up. He had made a poor choice and he deserved all of the consequences. It was a simple fact of life. 
“I’m doing just fine, thanks.” Jason said, entirely snide and sarcastic. “Look, I don’t need your help, okay? So fuck off.” 
It was a set of harsh, cutting words. But he thought getting distance from you would be best. This whole thing had woken him up from the sweet little fantasy the two of you had been participating in. He was a natural born fuck-up. And sure, he could have you for a while, play around a bit - but he could never truly make you happy. Eventually, he would fuck you up too. He was a harsh poison and it would be better if he got out of your life before you felt the full effects. 
He moved to shove the door closed and upon instinct, you reached up and fought him on it. Unconsciously, you winced as a sharp pain came from the injury in your stomach, reaching for it with your free hand as you held the door open with the other. It should have been no big deal. With your meta abilities, you usually healed quicker. You weren’t even used to feeling it when you got hurt. You were probably just feeling it worse because you were tired. 
You tried to ignore the pain. But in a moment, Jason’s eyes went wide with worry as his gaze darted from your face, knit with pain, to where your hand was nursing the injury. Any sense of smarmy discontent dropped from his features, immediately being replaced with a softness and worry for you. 
“You’re hurt.” He said quietly. 
He let the door fall open again, reaching for your hand to inspect the injury himself. 
“I’m fine.” You played the card this time, exchanging his lie for your own. 
It was an odd play. He had lied about not being so torn up inside, emotionally devastated as he was, and now you were lying about not being physically injured from the fight. The two of you made an odd, but perfectly matched pair. 
Jason barreled right past your words, and you were easily pliant to his touch as he removed your hand from the injury. You certainly were not expecting for him to find anything incriminating under your hand. But he glared at you when he found bright red spread across your palm, a glossy wetness leaking through your shirt. 
“You’re bleeding.” He grunted at you. 
Clearly, he was disappointed in the fact that you had neglected to bring this injury to the group’s attention. Pissed off at the fact that you weren’t in the medbay with Conner receiving some treatment right now. 
Maybe you could blame it on the chaos. Maybe you could blame it on the fact that with everyone so emotionally distraught, you didn’t want to be just another problem for everyone to fuss over. 
“Whoops.” You breathed out sarcastically. “I didn’t even notice.” 
That last part was honest. In all the adrenaline, all your worrying over whether or not Jason was going to live as you watched him dangle so high off the ground - you truly hadn’t paid any mind to the injury. 
“You didn’t-?” Jason huffed out in anger, but didn’t bother finishing the sentence. 
Perhaps he partially understood himself, knowing how the adrenaline from a fight could stamp out pain. Or perhaps he knew how truly stubborn you were and he didn’t want to waste his energy arguing with you. 
“You need this treated.” He added on. 
No matter how fucked in the head he was, he never wanted to see you hurt. That was something he would definitely waste his energy on - wearing down your stubbornness until you let him or someone else in the house take care of the injury properly. 
“Conner is worse off than I am.” You shrugged. “He needs the attention more.” 
“Then let me help you.” He said, an impatient nagging rising up in his throat. “Bruce gave me some first aid training. One thing that means I’m not totally useless.” 
The words made your chest ache for him, a pain that easily competed with the bleeding wound. 
“Jason-” 
You wanted to argue with him. You wanted to tell him he had infinite worth to you. 
But of course, he cut you off. 
“Just go sit on the bed.” He told you, quiet, but a firm command that you couldn’t ignore. 
He gently pushed past you, on a quest for some supplies to patch you up with. You then found yourself drifting into his room almost mindlessly, your hand clutching the wound again upon instinct. It was a place that you felt oddly at home. The nights you had spent in that bed since coming to Titans Tower, your head delightfully empty as he had fucked you hard and fast - they were by far your favourites. 
You would say it was because of the sex, and not just because you got to be wrapped up in Jason’s arms. Maybe everything had changed. Maybe your answers were different now. Maybe you were raw and tender and Jason wasn’t prepared to chase you in that devotion. 
But that was just the thing. With you and Jason, there was never any sense of devotion. You and Jason were always hard and fast. Teasing each other, verging on the edge of vengeful. It was a flame that burned intensely hot - but it was never anything soft. It was never anything that prompted you to knock on his door so late, wanting to check on his well being. It was nothing that prompted you to make chase to put your life on the line for him. 
Even just knowing that he had the intent to attend to your injury, called himself useful because of it - the thought cradled you like a warm blanket. It had you balancing on the edge of a dam holding back a barrage of feelings that you had been quelling down since the moment you had first put your lips on his.
“I told you to sit.” Jason’s voice came from behind you. 
He had raided the infirmary and now had a handful of supplies - luckily without anyone seeing him or questioning why. When you turned to him, he was closing the bedroom door behind him, sealing you both in with this newfound soft intensity, the tired lull of two people unwilling to hold back that softness anymore. It was entirely dangerous, and entirely life-saving at the same time; and neither of you realized it. 
“Since when do you get to boss me around?” You told him, your voice low and lacking any true spirit or sarcasm. 
It was in the same vein as the banter the two of you usually threw around - bickering about who was a bigger asshole, who was more stubborn, who was better in bed. 
You expected some kind of sexual comment in return. You could almost hear it now - he was the boss of you because he made you melt on his cock, made you mindless and dumb with it. 
But, no dice. 
The longer you stared at him, catching bits of the fresh pain swimming through those gorgeous blue eyes, you wished so badly for the mischief and sarcasm and light to come back and bite you the way that it used to. 
It only made your stomach churn harder at the whole situation. Things had officially changed between you and Jason. You had yet to find out if it was for the better, or for the painstakingly worse. 
Jason sighed through his nose. 
“You can be such an asshole sometimes.” He told you. Coming from him, and given the nature of your relationship, you knew it was almost a compliment. “Will you just sit down and let me help you?” 
Even though you were utterly terrified of the swelling of emotions you felt, bound to come to a head - you did. 
You sat on the edge of the bed and he placed the supplies beside you. 
When he mumbled out a quiet ‘lay back’, and you did, his cool fingertips at the hem of your shirt pulling it upward felt strangely more intimate than any other time you had been in this same position. It wasn’t heady, you weren’t granted the distraction of his mouth on yours and his tongue shoved between your lips while a harsh throbbing nagged between your legs.
This was quiet, and calm, and gentle. 
When you caught his eye above you as he wiped away the blood with some clean gauze, you saw nothing but pity and worry and sparkling affection for you. You almost dared to call it something as epic and dangerous as love, buried deep in his eyes. He worked with the most delicate touch, almost as if he was afraid to break you, before he glanced down and inspected the wound. 
His brow furrowed with even more intense worry, guilt nipping at his insides when he got a good look at it. 
“I think I see a bullet in here.” He told you, and then he moved around the bed and grabbed his phone, turning on the flashlight to have a better light to inspect it. You felt intensely naked, intensely caught when he began shining the light on your stomach with a harshly inquisitive look across his face. “Definitely something shiny. You got shot and you didn’t fucking tell anyone?” 
It was only then that you realized when you had gotten the wound - the exact moment clicking into place in your mind. 
“It was only a ricochet.” You argued quietly. “It’s not that bad.” 
Jason scoffed and rolled his eyes, and began sorting out his supplies, preparing to pull out whatever was lodged inside of you. 
… 
Dick explicitly told you to stay put. 
They only wanted the more experienced Titans, the Varsity squad on the case when dealing with Deathstroke. He blamed young naive incompetence as the reason Jason had gotten captured in the first place. You blamed him and Bruce pushing Jason out, making him feel like he needed so desperately to prove himself. But it was something Dick wasn’t ready to hear - an argument you weren’t going to have with the very stubborn team leader. 
Instead, you went for the silent route. You trailed the rest of them out of Tower, and when Dick strayed away from the rest of the group, his head on a swivel as he glanced back and forth, seemingly wanting to assure that none of the others were following him - you followed your gut instincts and went after him. 
You hid in the shadows and the moment that Deathstroke hit the button and those panels scrolled up, revealing Jason stranded on that scaffolding - you couldn’t help yourself. 
“Jason!” 
You screamed out his name, you leapt forward. 
Dick didn’t have time to scold you, not before the gunfire started. 
Kory came out of nowhere - seemingly, she had the same idea as you. Putting her life on the line for an emotionally repressed man that she hadn’t admitted her feelings for. But she was there because she was in love with the other Robin. (Or rather, a man who claimed over and over again that he wasn’t Robin.) 
Things quickly became a blur - flashes of flame as Kory fought, battling with the muzzle flashes from Deathstroke’s guns, limbs flying as they fought each other. You didn’t see it, but Deathstroke raised and aimed at you as you rushed toward the window, blindly going after Jason. In response, Dick charged forward, redirecting the gun as he pulled the trigger. You heard the sharp ‘ping’ sound of metal on metal - what you couldn’t see was the bullet hitting one of the metal beams in the ceiling. But you certainly felt it when it sliced into your side. 
At the time, it was nothing compared to the fear you felt for Jason. 
His eyes were wide with terror, and you could only focus on getting him to safety. You had no idea that a large part of his panic came from seeing you in the building. He had hoped that Dick would keep you away from all of this. But there you were, standing a few feet away from a man with a gun who was shooting around wildly. Jason would have delighted in being dropped off the building to his death if he had to see you get fatally shot when he could do nothing but squirm on the other side of the glass. 
You put two hands on the glass, banging on it - of course, it was no use. It was inches thick, meant to keep people from going through it at this height. Working entirely on instinct, you put your palms flat across it and began forming ice crystals over it, hoping to make it rigid and breakable if it was frozen. 
Once there was enough ice, you quickly looked around and spotted a metal pipe there for the in-progress construction of the building, so you grabbed it and rushed to smash the glass with it. You felt victorious as it shattered, and Jason flinched away from the shards, putting you one step closer to freeing him. 
Though the moment the glass was cleared, leaving the wind whipping around you, his first words of greeting to you were not celebratory. 
“What the hell are you doing here?” He barked at you, clearly angry with you. 
You felt a dull ache in your chest at this. You thought he might be relieved, happy, pleased. At the time, you couldn’t interpret his harsh reaction as worry for you possibly getting hurt. 
Nonetheless, you ignored his harshness. You would save him, whether he wanted to be saved or not. You draped your body through the window, reaching out to him. You made an effort to keep most of your weight planted on the floor of the building, in case the scaffolding wasn’t stable enough to hold two people at once. 
“What do you think?” You replied, pure sarcasm dripping through your voice as you reached behind Jason and began fiddling with the rope around his wrists. 
The position put the two of you in intensely close proximity. Jason caught a whiff of your unique scent, the shower gel you used that mingled with your body’s natural oils; and he felt so painfully at home. For the first time that night, he held back tears. He couldn’t help but to lean his forehead on your shoulder, taking comfort in having you so near after being on edge and terrified for so many hours. You resisted the urge to run a hand through his hair, to cradle him and give him further comfort. You forced yourself to focus on the task at hand - getting him to safety. 
Behind you, at the very back of the room, Dick and Deathstroke wrestled with the remote for the explosives attached to the scaffolding. 
Just as you managed to get Jason’s wrists freed, Deathstroke hit the switch, and the bombs went off. 
… 
You winced loudly as Jason dabbed at the wound with disinfectant. 
“I would say sorry… but, you’ll thank me later when this isn’t swollen and leaking puss.” He told you, throwing you a small smirk. 
It was smug. It was the usual kind of humor that he gave you. 
It was comforting to know that every trace of the Jason you knew hadn’t been stolen by Deathstroke. 
You held your breath as he pressed down with the medicine-covered gauze again, drawing much less of a reaction out of you this time. 
“Great mental image, Jay.” You replied, your voice dull. It lacked any of the true bite you wanted to deliver in response to him. “I’m sure it’s such a turn-on thinking about my puss.” 
It was meant to be a joke. But even unconsciously, it was an acknowledgement of that dangerous line - the line between truly caring and just using someone for sex. The line between having someone in your life as a body to get off with, and being so… homely with them. 
You and Jason were towing that line dangerously. It was a thread that you were balancing on, and it would either break, or you would cross to the other side and be forever bonded to him. 
Jason shrugged. “Maybe I don’t have to be turned on by you all the time.” 
There was more stuck in his throat. Another dangerous acknowledgement of that line. 
‘Maybe I just have to care.’ 
Both of you lulled into silence because neither of you dared to say it. 
After a few moments, Jason put down the gauze and hesitated to reach for the tweezers. He knew that pulling the bullet out would be painful, but inevitable. It was a lot like the state of your relationship with him. Break it off, and find happiness elsewhere, or acknowledge this big thing swelling to fruition between the two of you. Have Jason fuck it up eventually. Painful, but inevitable. 
“You shouldn’t have to be hurt like this.” Jason said quietly. “You shouldn’t have gotten hurt for my sake.” 
There it was again - words with a dangerous double meaning. 
You looked up at him, pure pain knit across his face, and for a moment he looked from the tweezers to you and he could hardly stand holding your gaze. 
‘It’s worth it.’ You wanted to say. ‘For you, I’d bear any pain.’ 
The words lived and died behind your eyes, and your tongue decided on something else entirely. 
“It’s nothing.” You told him. 
You downplayed the pain, pretending that the injury was only a minor inconvenience for you. And in the grand scheme of life, it was. With time, it would heal. Losing Jason would be something you’d never heal from. 
Jason shook his head at this statement. 
He forced himself to reach for the tweezers then. He handed you his phone, a silent agreement that you would hold the light as steady as you could. He knew you well, too well, and he knew that you needed something else to focus on to push away the pain. He put his free hand on the plush of your stomach, pulling back slightly to hold the wound open while you held the light on it. 
When the sharp metal of the tweezers breached your wound, you wanted to swear. You wanted to call him an asshole as the pain shot through you. You wanted to scold him for leaving the Tower and being kidnapped in the first place. But you knew that even if it was playful or sarcastic, fueled by the bite of your pain, it was not what he needed to hear right now. So instead, you held your breath, and gripped his phone hard, keeping the light steady as you bared the sharp shocks of pain. 
After a moment of digging around that felt like an eternity, he pulled out the fragment and held it up to show you as you collapsed back against the bed, panting with tears stinging the edges of your eyes. 
“It’s not nothing.” He declared sharply. 
You couldn’t conjure a response. You knew he was right. And you didn’t want to be forced to admit it. 
Instead, you turned off the light from his phone and relaxed into the bed, closing your eyes as he walked around to the trashcan and threw out the bullet fragment. It fell into the bottom of the plastic wastebasket with a very small ‘ping’ - making you wonder how something so small could cause so much trouble. 
Jason quickly returned to you, dabbing more disinfectant into the wound in a way that made you groan and flex away from the touch. Once again, he did not apologize. 
There were a few moments of muddy silence with nothing but your slightly labored breathing, trying to contain your sounds of pain so as to not make him feel any further guilt about the whole incident. 
Your mind churned, and you couldn’t help the next words that came from your mouth. 
“I meant what I said.” You told him. 
At the sound of this, his hands immediately stilled. You felt his eyes on you, and you forced yourself to open your own and look up at him once again. He stared you down with intense examination. He looked for any ounce of falsity, any sign that you were lying, even posturing to make him feel better after everything that had happened. 
He didn’t find any. 
You thought he might acknowledge you, that he might say something back to return your mighty words. Instead, he simply reached for more gauze, and began putting a final bandage on your wound. 
… 
The explosion caused a sharp rattle through your ears. It shocked you and made you dizzy and put the whole world off-kilter. The only thing you could perceive past the mind-numbing hum in your brain was the feeling of Jason’s rough glove gripping tightly onto your wrist, so you gripped back as hard as you could. 
When you blinked open your eyes, you were half-hanging out of the open window, the edge of the floor cutting into your waist as you held onto Jason by nothing but his wrist. His whole body weight created a harsh burn, straining on the muscles in your shoulder as you watched him dangle hundreds of feet above the street. 
Panic flooded you. 
You scrambled to reach out with your other hand, and the moment you moved, your shirt slipped against the sleek, polished material of the floor and you began sliding out the window. You gasped and Jason stilled his panicked flailing immediately. 
“Don’t move!” He shouted. 
“Give me your other hand so I can pull you up!” You shouted back. 
Beyond the unpleasant hum of your eardrums rattling, you still heard chaos behind you. Gunshots, the grunts of fighting, Kory and Dick’s voices yelling. They were busy with Deathstroke, they couldn’t help you or Jason. 
Jason looked up at you with glassy eyes. 
He knew that with all his gear weighing him down, even with the training you had been doing, you wouldn’t be able to pull him up. Not by yourself. And if you weren’t careful, his body weight would just pull you out of the window and cause you to go tumbling down to your death along with him. 
When you saw that frown etch across his lips, that filthy look of dawning - you glared at him. 
“Give me your other hand!” You screamed, your voice raking across your throat like hot coals. A hot boiling rage at the fact that he seemed almost determined to die. 
There was one thing he was determined about. If he was going to die, he wasn’t going to take you down with him. 
His gloved wrist started to slip from your nervous, sweaty palm, and you tried hard to hold on tight. You formed large shards of ice, hoping you could create some kind of bond there by freezing your hand to his. But it would only be temporary with gravity trying to tear the two of you apart. 
“You have to drop me, Y/N.” He said, nothing but pure mourning on his lips. “I’m dead weight.” 
You both knew it was a horrendous double meaning. 
He thought he was a dead weight to your life. 
“No!” You immediately defied this thought, that feral rage ripping at your throat once again. “I’m gonna pull you up. I’m gonna pull you up!” 
You reached your other hand down and tightly wrapped both of your hands around his wrist, yanking upward. The harsh movement caused you to slide even further out the window. You were now dangling dangerously over San Francisco with only the thickness of your thighs giving you any real stability on the intensely high up floor. It made you dizzy, and the only thing you had to focus on were the wet wells of Jason’s eyes staring up at you. 
“It’s no use!” Jason said tearfully. 
You ignored him. 
You cast your chin over your shoulder, and began shouting. 
“Help me!” You screamed, trying desperately to get the attention of Dick or Kory. “Help me! Fuck!” 
“You have to let go.”
Jason’s words immediately shifted your focus back to him. 
But of course, you refused. 
“I’m not letting go of you!” You declared sharply. “Not that easily.” 
As he stared up at your tearful eyes, he knew that you meant it as more. 
Unfortunately, it was the one thing he was terrified of. 
He thought that you saw him as some shiny perfect thing, something good and worth having in your life. He thought that you were incapable of seeing the poison, the true fuck-up that he was. If you didn’t let go of him, sooner or later, just like everyone else in his life, you were going to get burned. 
So Jason did what he had to do. 
He began prying your fingers off his wrist, trying his best to keep you stable while he forced himself from your grip. 
“No!” You shrieked. “No, no, no-” 
You didn’t have much room to fight him about it without falling out of the window yourself. 
You made a move to readjust, to get a tighter grip on him - and it was the one deadly move that caused him to slip out of your touch completely. 
You were forced to watch on in chest clenching horror, blinking through heavy tears as he began hurtling toward the ground. 
… 
If not for Conner - a literal miracle - swooping in and saving Jason at the last second, then you would have spent the rest of your life regretting those moments, wondering what you could have done differently to save him. 
When Jason finished taping down the bandages, making sure the wound was clean and secure, he laid his palm flat on top of it. It was a kind of ‘kissing it better’ that instantly spread warmth curling through your gut. It was a touch so incredibly tender - especially compared to the heated, aggressive groping you were used to from him - that it caused a whimper from the back of your throat. 
You knew it was unlikely, but you hoped that he hadn’t heard it. 
“All done.” He said quietly. 
You instantly felt regret when he took his hand away and began tidying up the medical supplies. But you forced yourself to sit upright, now feeling only muscle soreness and a much duller pain coming from the area. You felt intensely thankful for his care as you pulled your shirt back down, righting your clothes back into place. 
“You’re free to go now.” Jason told you, his voice still low, as though a single decibel would shatter the delicate peace between the two of you. 
You felt your heart sink. 
In an instant, you understood what it was - he was concerned about your physical wellbeing, but he didn’t actually want to have you around. Just like his reaction to you showing up at the hostage exchange - he didn’t want your presence there. 
You heaved a sigh and got off the bed as Jason busied himself with gathering up the used gauze to throw it away. As you put your hand on the doorknob, you couldn’t quite bring yourself to leave. 
It was something else. 
It had to be something else. 
Jason hadn’t let himself drop off a building in some desperate ploy just to get away from you. He had been trying to save you. 
He was so utterly willing to give his life for yours. 
And now he was trying to back down from that. 
You turned and faced him, leaving the door closed. When he turned from ditching things in the wastebasket, he froze. He was entirely surprised that you were still there.
The two of you locked eyes, both staying still - like a predator and prey locked in a stalemate, wondering who would run first. 
In this situation, you weren’t sure who was the prey. 
You were both so vulnerable. 
Jason thought it would be selfish to get caught up in all of this, to finally admit those dangerous feelings he had for you. When he cared for things, he usually ended up breaking them. Of course, it was never on purpose - he was an idiot. Everything he touched, he fucked up. He had made that more than evident with his last braindead plan, the outing to prove that he was worthy of being Robin. Something that had gotten you shot, probably could have gotten you killed. 
If you stuck with him any longer, you probably would end up being killed. And he would never forgive himself for that. 
He would be better off ripping himself from your hold, as much as it hurt. Giving you a dose of that heartbreak now so that you could get over him and go after better things. 
As you stared at Jason, you could see all the pain boiling underneath his surface. You wondered what he was thinking, what the hell he was churning over in that intense brain of his - but you didn’t dare to ask. 
You knew that he needed to be held right now - in every sense of the word. You knew that he needed to be cared for the way he had cared for your wound, pushing past the pain in order to heal. You wondered if he would lay down and bear it or if he would continue to fight you. 
You were the one to bravely step forward. Though Jason was tempted to ask you to leave, that thing inside of him yearning to marinate in his isolation because he deserved it, he pushed it down. He let his hands naturally come to sit on the plush comfort of your waist as you put a gentle touch on both his shoulders, leaning into his body ever so slightly. 
You laid your forehead on his cheek, right next to that ugly bruise that had been left on him, and he let out a contented sigh as he felt your warmth envelope him. For the first time since his feet had touched the ground, he felt calm. He felt safe. 
You smoothed a hand across his shoulder, and raised your head, using your touch to gently tip his face toward yours. He quickly realized that your intention was to kiss him. And something ached in his heart - something painful and longing. He knew that it would not be needy and haste with the intention of pile-driving toward sex like your other kisses had been. He knew that it would be the metamorphosis of your relationship that he was not prepared to go through. 
He nuzzled along your forehead, gently stopping you. 
“Please don’t do this.” He murmured quietly into your skin. 
He knew that it would break him. 
He knew that this was the moment - like Gatsby reaching up toward the stars - this would be the moment that he was tied to you forever, damned by his love for you. Only, much different than Gatsby, he wasn’t destined for some grant fate if he didn’t have you. He was on a one way path to a messy death, and he was determined not to take you down with him. 
Tears pricked the edges of his eyes at the thought. 
You pulled back, just enough to properly look him in the eyes, and your own tears formed when you saw that pathetic puppy dog looking back at you. 
“Why not?” You demanded, much sharper than you intended. You knew he was fragile and you didn’t want to upset him any further than he already was. 
“You know why.” He replied, his voice barely scraping above a whisper as the emotion clutched at his throat. 
Jason wanted to hold onto you forever, but he was also a realistic person. He expected that any minute now, you would rip away from his arms and charge out the door, entirely angry with him, and this would finally be over. You would finally be safe from him - safe from any nasty fate his life could conjure up for you. 
You hated what he was asking of you - asking you not to care for him anymore. As if you could somehow switch it off. Impossible. 
“I meant what I said.” You repeated yourself, still entirely firm in this conviction. “I’m not gonna let you go that easily.” 
You leaned in, planting your lips on his in a light kiss. A pained sigh ripped through you when he didn’t make any moves to kiss you back. 
“Jason, please.” You whimpered out desperately. “If you get to bandage my bullet wound, then I get to do this.” 
Jason wanted to spell it all out for you, plain and dirty. He wanted to get angry, he wanted to scream. He wanted to rush along the inevitable. He wanted to tell you what a poison he was to the world, that he deserved to die and you deserved better things. But he had the utmost feeling that you wouldn’t listen. 
“Please, stop pushing me away.” You whispered against his lips. 
Instead, he listened to your plea. He let himself indulge in this selfish softness for once. 
He reached up and grabbed your jaw, pulling you into a firmer kiss, declaring every ounce of passion and terror that he was feeling in those moments. You answered it all right back - digging your fingers into the shoulders of his shirt, letting out a hot huff against his cheek as you leaned into his body. 
He would never be perfect - but he was yours.
...
PLEASE NOTE: I do have a sequel in mind for this, but I don't know when I am going to have it finished and posted. Please do not ask me to write more of this or ask me when the sequel will be coming. If you are going to comment, please comment about the body of work here that I have already written.
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tenpintsofsundrop · 11 months
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Emergency Contact
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Jason Todd x Gender Neutral Reader
Leave me something - or let me out. I'm starving. Push me, pull me. Waiting for the start of:
Things that I want, this happily ever after. You choke on your words, but you swallow them faster. Just want you to be my Emergency Contact.
Summary:
After Jason miraculously comes home from his brush with Deathstroke, you're both feeling it in very different ways. You have an unexpected physical wound from the battle, and he has many (very expected) emotional wounds. You help each other heal. Even if it's very stubborn on both your parts.
Jason Todd x GN!Powered!Reader. Enemies/FWB to Lovers. Angst and Hurt/Comfort. (Slight Smut). Set during Season 2, Episode 5.
Word Count: 10,400
Titans Masterlist | AO3 Link
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List of detailed warnings and author's notes below the cut.
Warnings: general emotional angst, Jason has a self deprecating inner dialogue, (kind of) enemies to lovers - more like annoyances to fuck buddies to lovers, friends with benefits to lovers, the reader and Jason have a bantering/argumentative nature to their relationship, the reader is meant to be 100% gender neutral (the reader is never referred to in the third person, so there is no need to use they/them pronouns, but the reader is not called she/her or he/him), Jason calls the reader ‘babe’ (imo, a completely gender neutral term and he would call anybody that), mentions of alcohol (Jason drinking a beer), the reader character has ice powers (not entirely relevant to the plot but I couldn’t help myself lmao).
sexual themes throughout, mentions of sexting (no detailed descriptions), mentions of sexting in public, mentions of the reader character sending nudes to Jason (no detailed descriptions of the photos), one scene with detailed smut (but it is not the primary focus of the fic), the reader’s genitals are not described in any specific way, some dirty talk, Jason is more dominant and the reader is more submissive, penetrative sex, Jason is annoying even during sex, Jason has a pain kink (even when he’s a dom, he’s a painslut, I don’t make the rules), scratching/marking (Jason receiving), slight humiliation kink.
mentions of canon level violence, mentions of kidnapping (in alignment with canon), mentions of Jason being beaten by Deathstroke, mentions of Jason’s near-death experience (being dropped off the building), gun violence, the reader is injured - has a bullet wound/bullet fragment in their stomach, mentions of blood, descriptions of first-aid, mentions of puss from an infected wound (theoretically, not something that happens in the fic). That should be everything.
A/N: The title for the fic comes from a song by Pierce the Veil of the same name. It's a newer song, and it's one that I absolutely went to when looking for a title for this fic. The concept of becoming someone's emergency contact is about upgrading the relationship from casual to much more serious, and just the whole song, and specific lyrics in it suit this fic so well. I highly recommend listening to it paired with this fic.
This was based on a request from my old blog, but obvi I don't have that ask anymore - the request was about Jason getting shot and having his wound attended to by the reader, but I changed it to the reader getting shot cause I thought that was more interesting and less common. If the person who made that request sees this and finds my new blog, I hope you enjoy it! And in general, I hope everyone who reads this enjoys it.
...
If asked, you would be hard pressed to explain your relationship with Jason Todd. 
The best way you could describe it would probably be - friends with benefits? 
But most of the time, the two of you weren’t even friends. You weren’t the type to hang out casually, or spend time alone together if it didn’t involve ripping each other’s clothes off. 
If you ever exchanged secrets or those precious bits of your most raw selves, it was by mistake. It was through sarcasm, or coming off the tired lips of someone who had just been exhausted by a few orgasms. The two of you knew each other well, quite literally inside and out. But you always made a deep, concerted effort to hold each other at arm’s length. And maybe that’s part of what all the snark and harsh words were for. 
It wasn’t all arguing. You were friendly. You could be civil, at the very least. 
Right from the moment you had first met Jason, you had found him to be so damn annoying, a shitstain on the earth - yet, someone you couldn’t stay away from. The line between flirtatious banter and a truly grinding argument was always so thin with the two of you. 
… 
You hadn’t expected that your life would be truly changed when you walked into that safehouse in Chicago that day. You truly thought nothing of him when his eyes landed on you - in those moments, a completely anonymous stranger, raking his eyes over you like you were a piece of meat. It was a gaze that immediately made you feel naked, something that made you want to smack him. You told yourself it was because he was being a pervert, not because of the heat that curled in your gut at feeling so intensely desired by him. 
He had been sitting on the couch sipping a beer like he owned the place, his thighs spread wide in a way you immediately decided was arrogant and annoying rather than hot - showing off his muscle tone as if it was trying to break through his jeans. Definitely annoying. Definitely the stance of a fuckboy trying to look bigger and badder than he was. He definitely was not attractive. 
When Dick led you, Rachel, Gar, and Kory further into the condo that seemed far too conspicuous to be a safehouse, the stranger you would later come to know as Jason quickly spoke up. 
“Who are your friends?” He asked. 
As he rose from the couch, his eyes lingered on you. Though his words seemed more out of curiosity, you couldn’t help but feel that bite of something more salacious lingering in his voice. 
It caused you to scoff and roll your eyes. 
“Not important.” Dick declared, his voice snippy. He was clearly annoyed with this new guy, and you could tell that your perceptions of him were definitely not ill-informed. 
“Who’s he?” Kory asked, going for the obvious question. 
“Not important.” Dick parroted out the words again, sounding much shorter with his patience. 
“Anybody want a brew?” Jason asked, motioning with the beer bottle in his hand. 
“Brew?” You twisted your eyebrows with disgust, staring him down as you commented on his odd choice of slang. 
He didn’t get to reply, as you were trampled over by Gar’s enthusiastic voice in your ear. 
“I do!” He said, raising his hand with excitement. 
“No, you don’t.” You quickly told him, reaching out to grab his hand and put it back down. “It’s disgusting.” 
You had a grand suspicion that Gar had never drank beer before, and he had no idea what he was truly asking for. Rather, he was simply taking advantage of trying new things because Dick and Kory were incredibly slack parental figures and he was away from home for the first time. 
“No, no one wants a brew.” Dick sighed, shaking his head. He threw Jason a small glare and you resisted the urge to laugh. 
“That can’t be Adamson.” Kory said, motioning toward Jason. 
This left you confused. But you didn’t question it. 
“He’s not Adamson. Adamson’s in the bathroom. Unconscious.” Dick explained. 
“Hi, I’m Rachel.” Rachel told Jason, offering him a sweet smile - being her usual sweet self. 
“Jason.” He introduced himself, in that moment, finally giving you a name to that obnoxious face. 
“I’m Gar!” Gar said with a grin, to which Jason nodded. 
Jason caught you glaring at him, and looked you up and down again, as if trying to willfully tear off your clothes with his eyes. It made your skin itch with heat and you would forever deny that it was a feeling you liked. 
“What can I call you, babe?” He asked, his voice entirely slimy, the kind of tone he would have used to recite cheesy lines to Tinder dates, you were entirely sure of. 
Before you could come up with some clever reply, Dick sighed in frustration and started balking again. 
“Okay, who we all are doesn’t matter right now.” He pressed, his neck so entirely tense that veins began to pop from the skin. “Can we just chill out, relax, sit on the couch and watch TV or something?” 
It seemed that he wouldn’t get his wish. 
Gar quickly charged around the table, finding something else to get strung up about. 
“Yo, when did you get another one?” He asked, putting his hands on both of the expensive cases on the long dining table - a copy identical to the one you knew to be containing Dick’s Robin outfit. 
It made you curious, and the answer that followed certainly surprised you. 
“That one’s mine.” Jason said, his chest literally puffing out with pride as he stated the fact. 
“No way.” You scoffed. 
“Yes way.” He quickly argued back, the whole exchange sounding entirely juvenile.
“This one’s yours? Wait, you’re Robin too?” Gar quickly put the pieces together. 
“I thought you were Robin?” Rachel commented, tilting her head toward Dick with curiosity. 
“I am.” Dick said firmly. 
“He was.” Jason corrected, a cocky smirk forming across his lips. 
“Batman really lowered the height requirement, huh.” You said. 
The words flew from your mouth before you could stop them, seeing as it was likely the only thing you could nitpick about Jason’s appearance. Between his stunning sharp jaw, his piercing blue eyes, his oddly appealing wild hair, his muscle tone being somehow visible beneath his baggy clothing - all of it made you equally frustrated and annoyed with him, and your baser urges couldn’t resist the low-hanging fruit. 
You felt victory and a slight pang of guilt when Jason deflated because of your comment, shrinking back into himself at your words. 
He didn’t have anything to say in return, he simply sipped his beer. 
“Wait, how many Robins are there?” Gar said, beginning to excitedly ramble at the thought. “Are there a lot? Cause I would love to-” 
“Okay, quiet.” Kory cut him off, clearly becoming annoyed with all of this dancing around the point as much as Dick was. “Sit.” 
Her words were firm, and you couldn’t help but to listen. You found yourself collapsing to sit on the couch while Rachel and Gar took seats at the dining table. Jason continued to linger in the middle of the room, staring at Kory and Dick as their frustration filled the air. 
“Bathroom.” Kory told Dick, and then they left to deal with whoever - or whatever - Adamson was. 
Jason sighed and took a seat beside you. When his eyes fell on you, you set your jaw and glared at him. You didn’t give away a single ounce of the heat you were feeling as his eyes locked with yours. 
“Even if I am the shorter Robin, I can assure you that everything else about me is… very long.” He lowered his voice and whispered those last words, crowding into your personal space as he did so. 
It sent shivers down your spine, his silken voice making the words sound too tempting. Even if you twisted your face and said ‘gross!’ causing him to dissolve into laughter, you didn’t make an effort to move away from him or put any space between your two bodies on the very large couch. You told yourself it was because you were tired from a very long day of travel, not because you were enjoying the smell of his strangely expensive cologne from this close by. 
His grin was still entirely smug, and you couldn’t stand it. 
When he raised the beer bottle up to his mouth again, you reached over and put a hand on his forearm, forcefully dragging his arm down as you made a snide comment. 
“That shit is disgusting, why the hell do you drink it?” You asked. 
You found your face drifting toward his again and if asked, you would say it was a form of intimidation - not that you were being drawn in by an unconscious attraction to him. 
“Because I can.” He replied, just as snide as he slipped your grip and sipped on the drink. 
You mocked his words in an entirely childish voice, and then you raised a single finger up to it and skimmed along the neck of the bottle. It took only a single moment of concentration with your skilled powers to freeze the beer inside solid. He thought he felt an extra chill coming off his hand, but convinced himself that he imagined it. But when he kept it tilted and nothing came out to meet his lips, he shook it and then stuck an inquiring eye inside the bottle. 
When he saw that it was completely frozen, he looked over and saw you grinning, and little did you know - that was the moment he became completely taken with you. You were one of the most annoying people he had ever met, and he found himself so intensely attracted to you. 
Even if it was getting under your skin by arguing with you or fucking your brains out, he knew in that moment - he had to get inside you and drive you insane the same way that he knew you would for him. 
… 
When Dick left to go check on his old circus friend Clay, Jason winked at you and said ‘don’t miss me too much’. You made a show of putting a finger near your mouth and audibly gagging. 
Later that night, when Jason didn’t return, you hated the curl of disappointment that panged in your stomach. You wanted to hit yourself for staring at the door, waiting for the second Robin to come in behind Dick. 
You hated yourself even more for replying to Jason’s texts. 
Apparently he had taken your phone out of your jacket pocket when you went to the bathroom (not to see Adamson - a different bathroom, to pee). And he had put himself in your contacts as ‘Hot Guy’. He had also sent himself a text from your phone that read ‘omg Jason you’re so hot, will you fuck me?’. And then replied to it from his own phone with a picture of his cock. 
Unfortunately, the only thing you could mock about the picture was poor lighting. 
When you told him as much, he quickly remedied that with several more pictures - ones with better lighting. He sent a video with very distinct audio. You would deny that you rushed to put your headphones in to listen to it while you sat on the train with Kory and Gar. You would deny that it drove a hard, hot pain between your thighs. 
You dug through a folder and sent some pictures of your own. You told yourself it was to prove to him that you were too good for him - to show off something he could never actually have. To tease him. 
You would deny that you loved the compliments he gave you, that you ate up the affection like a plant lovingly soaking up the sun. 
When you were sexting him, you had no clue that you were ever going to see him again. It was almost mindless, something for a dopamine hit to distract yourself from all the chaos going on around you. You weren’t doing it because you actually liked Jason. You didn’t have any real attractions toward him, or any real plans to carry out all of the bold things you said in those messages. 
You had no clue that you’d end up living together. 
When you did find out that Dick would be taking Jason into the newly reopened Titans Tower along with you, Gar, and Rachel, you didn’t make a big deal of it in your mind. When Jason made flirtatious remarks toward you in person, you brushed him off. You put up a wall. 
You told yourself that he was nothing more than a cocky, shallow guy who would use you for sex and then throw you away - something you could never actually build a proper relationship with. And if you were supposed to live together, be some kind of team like Dick expected you to be, then you couldn’t be messy. You couldn’t get emotional. 
You had no clue that on one of those first nights living together, your self assured discipline not to give into your lust for him would break like a wafer cookie, and you would be in his bed faster than a sea turtle running into ocean. 
… 
“Fuck, babe, you feel so good on my cock.” Jason grunted, his face buried in your neck as he thrusted deep inside of you. The loud squelch of artificial wetness coming from between your thighs as he worked his hips, working you open with a needy, demanding pace. “Bet you love this cock, huh? Tell me how fuckin’ much you love it.” 
“Shut up.” 
The words came from your throat as a weak whimper, much less powerful than you had intended. 
You didn’t want to give him any more power than he already held over you - he had you weak and willing on his cock, something you would have never admitted could be true until it was happening in these moments. 
Though you would never admit it aloud, you loved the way he handled you. Having you pinned against the bed with his fingers digging into the flesh of your hips, having you breathless and moaning as he fucked into you with fast, obviously skilled strokes. Your nails cut into the flesh of his back, and he let out a low rumble from his gut as the sharp sting sent a wave of pleasure through him. 
You hated the twinge of lustful embarrassment that curled in your gut when he chuckled at your words. 
“Oh, you want me to shut up?” He asked, slightly breathless from the act himself, moving one hand beside your head to raise himself up slightly to look in your eyes. 
He was sweaty, disheveled, his hair a mess, his muscles taught with the effort as he continued to pound into you. You hated that you had imagined him much like this before, and that this outlived all of your fantasies. 
“Yes.” You fired back. “Just shut up and fuck me.” 
He bit his lip - something you didn’t know was him trying to hold back his orgasm, so utterly turned on by your bratty defiance, the twinge of a whimper in your voice as you said those words. 
“You weren’t tellin’ me to shut up when I was texting you.” 
He said, all hot breath fanning across your chin, his hips spearing forward in sharp, hard hits that made your skin smack loudly together. It made you work hard to suppress moans deep in your chest in a way that was painful, like venom inside your lungs. You wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of your sounds, of knowing just how good he was fucking you - even if he could see it written all over your pleasure twisted face. 
“You only begged for more when I was tellin’ you how I was gonna lay you on my bed. Take you apart… make you scream my name.” 
He reached his other hand from your hip to the point where you were joined. He began touching that tender place, making sharp, vicious strokes that were almost vengeful. Tears easily gathered in your eyes and he let out another chuckle when you choked on a deep, pleasurable wail. 
“Tell me, how many times did you touch yourself reading what I wrote?” 
He asked, leaning down to whisper the words right in your ear. 
“How many times did you cum thinking about me?” 
“I didn’t.” You choked out, digging your nails deeper into the skin of his back, causing him to grunt as the pain mixed with the pleasure flowing through him. 
“Sure, babe.” He smirked down at you, turning that look into something absolutely pavlovian that would forever make you feel his cock deep inside of you when you saw it, rather than feeling annoyed. 
Maybe from that point on, it was a bit of both. 
In an effort to shut him up, you reached up and claimed his lips. It was supposed to be a kiss, but it was mostly teeth. When you bit down on his bottom lip, snarling, he tasted blood and the way he moaned at the pain was absolutely unmistakable. It was something you remembered and used against him many times after that. 
… 
You wouldn’t allow yourself any room for self hatred when it came to that break in your self control. When it became an ongoing thing, you spun it as positive in your mind. 
It was just sexual release. You and Jason both needed it. It paired well with intense training and the heavy studying that Dick made you do. It lowered your stress levels a lot, and it helped you get through the day. 
The more time you spent around Jason, the more you got to know him, and the more you came to realize that he was nowhere near shallow. You easily saw that he was caring, deep, complex, troubled. The more time passed, you found yourself falling for him and the more you deeply denied it. Because it was just sex. 
Things were good between the two of you, and you knew that if you added anything else to the mix - any complicated, mushy feelings - you would fuck it up. 
You were especially reminded of this - how important it was not to fuck things up - just a day or so before every other force aside from you railed Titans Tower and began royally fucking things up. 
… 
It was a morning just like any other at Titans Tower. It was delightfully quiet - even though Dick demanded that everyone get up at ungodly early hours to begin training, you had somehow managed to wake up before everyone else and you were enjoying the peace it brought you. 
When you got up to see that Jason was already in the kitchen, standing at the counter as he munched on a bowl of cereal, you wanted to scorn the idea that your peace would be interrupted. But instead, you found yourself willfully suppressing a smile. 
You yawned and walked over to the counter, grabbing a bowl from one of the cupboards, thinking that cereal was just the right idea on his part. A deep frown cut through your face when you poured out the rest of the cereal box he had left on the counter, and a very measly amount fell into your bowl. 
“What kind of asshole only leaves three fucking cornflakes in the bottom of the box?” You scoffed, causing him to chuckle. 
“Learn to count, babe.” He told you, speaking with his mouth half-full. “That’s more than three.” 
You rolled your eyes. You were likely exaggerating - but still, it seemed rude to you to leave such a small portion, barely a handful, in the bottom of the box. 
“Or did I make you cum so hard last night that I knocked the common sense out of your head?” He added on, throwing you that signature smirk that made heat bloom between your thighs. 
You let out a sarcastic snort, giving him a purposefully disgusted grimace as you lifted the bowl up and dumped the remaining cereal into his portion instead. 
“You might as well take these.” You told him. “And don’t flatter yourself, you’re not that good.” 
You moved behind them, distracting yourself from the conversation by making a cup of coffee. 
“Oh really?” He perked up, rising to his full height, pure mischief in his voice. “It didn’t sound like it last night.” 
Much to your horror, he then began imitating your moans. 
“‘Oh, Jason! Oh, fuck me! More!’” 
It was a cartoonish, pornographic imitation, something he likely wouldn’t have done if the others were anywhere within earshot. Oddly enough, even though your relationship was casual, you still kept it guarded and private, as though it were some precious secret that needed to be kept from the others. 
“‘Jason, please, your dick is the best! Oh, make me cum!’” 
But that was the farthest thing from your mind as embarrassment curled in your stomach, the reaction he likely wanted to draw out of you. You hated that you didn’t truly know if it was accurate or not, because sometimes - yes, he did fuck your brains out and make you completely mindless on his cock. 
But you would never admit that he was right. 
“Shut up.” You sighed, causing him to dissolve into laughter, feeling as though he had won. 
But you wouldn’t simply leave it at that. 
Instead, as you pushed the button on the machine and your coffee began to drip, you turned around and gently placed your fingers on the side of his cereal bowl. You froze all the milk inside of it solid, making it into one large frozen chunk with the spoon stuck inside when he wasn’t looking - distracted, staring at your face, looking for any trace of the reaction that he had drawn out of you. 
You just glared, and he smirked once more. 
When he picked up the spoon again and went to take another bite, the entire bowl came with it. He sighed in defeat when he realized what you had done. 
“You know, it’s so damn annoying when you do that.” He sighed. 
“I know.” You grinned at him. 
He couldn’t help the butterflies that fluttered in his stomach at this. He resisted the urge to grab you by the sides of your head and steal the grin of your mouth with his own. He told you that it was out of annoyance, and not affection. He told himself those lines were most definitely not blurred when it came to you. 
… 
Confessing your feelings to Jason would not have been your choice. 
Given the choice, you would have let your feelings quietly live and die inside of you. You would have just kept Jason as a friend. You would have even dropped the amazing sex if it meant staying on good terms with him. 
But the stakes rose pretty quickly, and things were taken out of your hands. The choice was stolen from you and Jason entirely against your will. 
When you found out he was missing, supposedly kidnapped by Doctor Light on the heels of some misguided plan - something inside of you shattered. Up until that moment, if you thought it was just a stupid crush, or an infatuation inside of you that would easily fade with time - you quickly found out that you were wrong. 
You went through the stages of grief like a rocket. 
Denial. Staring at the door, waiting for him to walk inside at any moment. Just like you had back at the safehouse.
Anger. Being so pissed at Dick at the other older Titans that you could barely breathe. How had they let this happen to him? How could they make him feel so inadequate that he felt the need to go out on his own, half-cocked, clearly doing something in the name of looking for their approval? 
Bargaining. You would have traded places with him. You would have been the one, alone and scared and stranded if it meant that he got to be at home safe. You would have gone with him to carry out the stupid plan if he had only asked. Why hadn’t he asked you? 
Depression. You wept in your room, hands clasped over your face, letting out chest-shaking sobs as you thought of the possibility of him never returning home again. You realized the possibility of him dying was very real and it made your lungs burn. 
And then finally - Acceptance. You finally accepted that your feelings for him were something bigger, and if it meant that you were the only person in the Tower who truly cared about him (probably aside from Gar) - the only person who didn’t just see him as a pawn to be used against Deathstroke - then you had to do something about it. 
So you laid out your love for Jason. You put it all on the line for him. You accidentally confessed to him, showed your feelings in a gesture so quiet it screamed. 
You knew that for someone who stepped up to become Robin, someone who scorned cops for pummeling down on the innocent when they were supposed to be protectors - stepping up to try and save his life meant a love bigger than anything else you could have done. 
And he was terrified of it. There was a big justice in your love for him. And to him, there was an even bigger justice in giving you an out to escape it - to escape loving him.  
… 
Hectic. 
That was easily how you would describe the last few days at Titans Tower. 
Between the unexpected arrival of Rose - Dick taking on another stray because, like Rachel said, he couldn’t resist a bird with a broken wing. Finding out that she was related to one of the deadliest men on earth that the Titans apparently had previous history with. And then Jason going off on his own without telling you, some botched hostage trade, and the group picking up yet another stray - a strange boy who had saved Jason’s life. It was all a blur of hectic chaos that had you snapping your neck to keep up. 
Sleep was scarce and you couldn’t remember the last time you’d had a proper meal. 
But you weren’t truly worried about any of that. 
Dust had been kicked up around your life, and you couldn’t wait for it to settle before you made your next important decision. 
Even though the wounds were still tender, you knew that things were safe for now, and your number one concern was Jason. 
The minute he had gotten in the door, even though he was slightly hobbled and clearly sore from whatever Deathstroke had done to him, he rushed out of your sight. He was clearly eager to get away from everyone like a wounded animal sulking away to lick his wounds in peace. And when you had chased him, ignoring a nagging pain in your own side from the fight, he had slammed his bedroom door in your face, entirely uncaring of the fact that you called out his name, concerned for him. 
The rest of the group was distracted with Conner - not knowing what he had been shot with or how to fix it. You hated it, but in the eyes of the group, yet again, Jason and any of his problems fell to the back burner. 
After you had taken a short shower and changed your clothes, you found yourself here. Standing in front of Jason’s closed bedroom door, hoping not to face another cold rejection. 
You wondered if he would be sleeping, wondered if you should interrupt his peace. But you knew that sleep was unlikely after everything that had happened. 
So you took the leap. 
You raised a fist, once again pushing down that stinging pain coming from the right side of your stomach. You reasoned that it was probably nothing more than a bruise forming there. And you knocked on the door. 
A few moments later, the door was jerked open, and Jason glared at you. 
His eyes were dull and tired, and there was a large bruise forming on the side of his mouth. Probably one of many others that you couldn’t see, from the way he had been walking earlier. He likely hadn’t been sleeping, but you had disturbed him. 
“What the hell do you want?” He grumbled out, his voice dull, lacking any true fight. 
“I wanted to check on you.” You told him, entirely honest. “I know it might seem stupid, but I wanna see how you’re doing.” 
Jason scoffed and rolled his eyes. 
He wanted to agree that - yes, it was stupid. It should have been obvious how he was doing after being kidnapped, beaten, and dropped off a building. But he was an idiot who had gotten himself thrown headfirst into that mess, thinking he could handle it. And he didn’t need to go crying to you about how badly he had fucked up. He had made a poor choice and he deserved all of the consequences. It was a simple fact of life. 
“I’m doing just fine, thanks.” Jason said, entirely snide and sarcastic. “Look, I don’t need your help, okay? So fuck off.” 
It was a set of harsh, cutting words. But he thought getting distance from you would be best. This whole thing had woken him up from the sweet little fantasy the two of you had been participating in. He was a natural born fuck-up. And sure, he could have you for a while, play around a bit - but he could never truly make you happy. Eventually, he would fuck you up too. He was a harsh poison and it would be better if he got out of your life before you felt the full effects. 
He moved to shove the door closed and upon instinct, you reached up and fought him on it. Unconsciously, you winced as a sharp pain came from the injury in your stomach, reaching for it with your free hand as you held the door open with the other. It should have been no big deal. With your meta abilities, you usually healed quicker. You weren’t even used to feeling it when you got hurt. You were probably just feeling it worse because you were tired. 
You tried to ignore the pain. But in a moment, Jason’s eyes went wide with worry as his gaze darted from your face, knit with pain, to where your hand was nursing the injury. Any sense of smarmy discontent dropped from his features, immediately being replaced with a softness and worry for you. 
“You’re hurt.” He said quietly. 
He let the door fall open again, reaching for your hand to inspect the injury himself. 
“I’m fine.” You played the card this time, exchanging his lie for your own. 
It was an odd play. He had lied about not being so torn up inside, emotionally devastated as he was, and now you were lying about not being physically injured from the fight. The two of you made an odd, but perfectly matched pair. 
Jason barreled right past your words, and you were easily pliant to his touch as he removed your hand from the injury. You certainly were not expecting for him to find anything incriminating under your hand. But he glared at you when he found bright red spread across your palm, a glossy wetness leaking through your shirt. 
“You’re bleeding.” He grunted at you. 
Clearly, he was disappointed in the fact that you had neglected to bring this injury to the group’s attention. Pissed off at the fact that you weren’t in the medbay with Conner receiving some treatment right now. 
Maybe you could blame it on the chaos. Maybe you could blame it on the fact that with everyone so emotionally distraught, you didn’t want to be just another problem for everyone to fuss over. 
“Whoops.” You breathed out sarcastically. “I didn’t even notice.” 
That last part was honest. In all the adrenaline, all your worrying over whether or not Jason was going to live as you watched him dangle so high off the ground - you truly hadn’t paid any mind to the injury. 
“You didn’t-?” Jason huffed out in anger, but didn’t bother finishing the sentence. 
Perhaps he partially understood himself, knowing how the adrenaline from a fight could stamp out pain. Or perhaps he knew how truly stubborn you were and he didn’t want to waste his energy arguing with you. 
“You need this treated.” He added on. 
No matter how fucked in the head he was, he never wanted to see you hurt. That was something he would definitely waste his energy on - wearing down your stubbornness until you let him or someone else in the house take care of the injury properly. 
“Conner is worse off than I am.” You shrugged. “He needs the attention more.” 
“Then let me help you.” He said, an impatient nagging rising up in his throat. “Bruce gave me some first aid training. One thing that means I’m not totally useless.” 
The words made your chest ache for him, a pain that easily competed with the bleeding wound. 
“Jason-” 
You wanted to argue with him. You wanted to tell him he had infinite worth to you. 
But of course, he cut you off. 
“Just go sit on the bed.” He told you, quiet, but a firm command that you couldn’t ignore. 
He gently pushed past you, on a quest for some supplies to patch you up with. You then found yourself drifting into his room almost mindlessly, your hand clutching the wound again upon instinct. It was a place that you felt oddly at home. The nights you had spent in that bed since coming to Titans Tower, your head delightfully empty as he had fucked you hard and fast - they were by far your favourites. 
You would say it was because of the sex, and not just because you got to be wrapped up in Jason’s arms. Maybe everything had changed. Maybe your answers were different now. Maybe you were raw and tender and Jason wasn’t prepared to chase you in that devotion. 
But that was just the thing. With you and Jason, there was never any sense of devotion. You and Jason were always hard and fast. Teasing each other, verging on the edge of vengeful. It was a flame that burned intensely hot - but it was never anything soft. It was never anything that prompted you to knock on his door so late, wanting to check on his well being. It was nothing that prompted you to make chase to put your life on the line for him. 
Even just knowing that he had the intent to attend to your injury, called himself useful because of it - the thought cradled you like a warm blanket. It had you balancing on the edge of a dam holding back a barrage of feelings that you had been quelling down since the moment you had first put your lips on his.
“I told you to sit.” Jason’s voice came from behind you. 
He had raided the infirmary and now had a handful of supplies - luckily without anyone seeing him or questioning why. When you turned to him, he was closing the bedroom door behind him, sealing you both in with this newfound soft intensity, the tired lull of two people unwilling to hold back that softness anymore. It was entirely dangerous, and entirely life-saving at the same time; and neither of you realized it. 
“Since when do you get to boss me around?” You told him, your voice low and lacking any true spirit or sarcasm. 
It was in the same vein as the banter the two of you usually threw around - bickering about who was a bigger asshole, who was more stubborn, who was better in bed. 
You expected some kind of sexual comment in return. You could almost hear it now - he was the boss of you because he made you melt on his cock, made you mindless and dumb with it. 
But, no dice. 
The longer you stared at him, catching bits of the fresh pain swimming through those gorgeous blue eyes, you wished so badly for the mischief and sarcasm and light to come back and bite you the way that it used to. 
It only made your stomach churn harder at the whole situation. Things had officially changed between you and Jason. You had yet to find out if it was for the better, or for the painstakingly worse. 
Jason sighed through his nose. 
“You can be such an asshole sometimes.” He told you. Coming from him, and given the nature of your relationship, you knew it was almost a compliment. “Will you just sit down and let me help you?” 
Even though you were utterly terrified of the swelling of emotions you felt, bound to come to a head - you did. 
You sat on the edge of the bed and he placed the supplies beside you. 
When he mumbled out a quiet ‘lay back’, and you did, his cool fingertips at the hem of your shirt pulling it upward felt strangely more intimate than any other time you had been in this same position. It wasn’t heady, you weren’t granted the distraction of his mouth on yours and his tongue shoved between your lips while a harsh throbbing nagged between your legs.
This was quiet, and calm, and gentle. 
When you caught his eye above you as he wiped away the blood with some clean gauze, you saw nothing but pity and worry and sparkling affection for you. You almost dared to call it something as epic and dangerous as love, buried deep in his eyes. He worked with the most delicate touch, almost as if he was afraid to break you, before he glanced down and inspected the wound. 
His brow furrowed with even more intense worry, guilt nipping at his insides when he got a good look at it. 
“I think I see a bullet in here.” He told you, and then he moved around the bed and grabbed his phone, turning on the flashlight to have a better light to inspect it. You felt intensely naked, intensely caught when he began shining the light on your stomach with a harshly inquisitive look across his face. “Definitely something shiny. You got shot and you didn’t fucking tell anyone?” 
It was only then that you realized when you had gotten the wound - the exact moment clicking into place in your mind. 
“It was only a ricochet.” You argued quietly. “It’s not that bad.” 
Jason scoffed and rolled his eyes, and began sorting out his supplies, preparing to pull out whatever was lodged inside of you. 
… 
Dick explicitly told you to stay put. 
They only wanted the more experienced Titans, the Varsity squad on the case when dealing with Deathstroke. He blamed young naive incompetence as the reason Jason had gotten captured in the first place. You blamed him and Bruce pushing Jason out, making him feel like he needed so desperately to prove himself. But it was something Dick wasn’t ready to hear - an argument you weren’t going to have with the very stubborn team leader. 
Instead, you went for the silent route. You trailed the rest of them out of Tower, and when Dick strayed away from the rest of the group, his head on a swivel as he glanced back and forth, seemingly wanting to assure that none of the others were following him - you followed your gut instincts and went after him. 
You hid in the shadows and the moment that Deathstroke hit the button and those panels scrolled up, revealing Jason stranded on that scaffolding - you couldn’t help yourself. 
“Jason!” 
You screamed out his name, you leapt forward. 
Dick didn’t have time to scold you, not before the gunfire started. 
Kory came out of nowhere - seemingly, she had the same idea as you. Putting her life on the line for an emotionally repressed man that she hadn’t admitted her feelings for. But she was there because she was in love with the other Robin. (Or rather, a man who claimed over and over again that he wasn’t Robin.) 
Things quickly became a blur - flashes of flame as Kory fought, battling with the muzzle flashes from Deathstroke’s guns, limbs flying as they fought each other. You didn’t see it, but Deathstroke raised and aimed at you as you rushed toward the window, blindly going after Jason. In response, Dick charged forward, redirecting the gun as he pulled the trigger. You heard the sharp ‘ping’ sound of metal on metal - what you couldn’t see was the bullet hitting one of the metal beams in the ceiling. But you certainly felt it when it sliced into your side. 
At the time, it was nothing compared to the fear you felt for Jason. 
His eyes were wide with terror, and you could only focus on getting him to safety. You had no idea that a large part of his panic came from seeing you in the building. He had hoped that Dick would keep you away from all of this. But there you were, standing a few feet away from a man with a gun who was shooting around wildly. Jason would have delighted in being dropped off the building to his death if he had to see you get fatally shot when he could do nothing but squirm on the other side of the glass. 
You put two hands on the glass, banging on it - of course, it was no use. It was inches thick, meant to keep people from going through it at this height. Working entirely on instinct, you put your palms flat across it and began forming ice crystals over it, hoping to make it rigid and breakable if it was frozen. 
Once there was enough ice, you quickly looked around and spotted a metal pipe there for the in-progress construction of the building, so you grabbed it and rushed to smash the glass with it. You felt victorious as it shattered, and Jason flinched away from the shards, putting you one step closer to freeing him. 
Though the moment the glass was cleared, leaving the wind whipping around you, his first words of greeting to you were not celebratory. 
“What the hell are you doing here?” He barked at you, clearly angry with you. 
You felt a dull ache in your chest at this. You thought he might be relieved, happy, pleased. At the time, you couldn’t interpret his harsh reaction as worry for you possibly getting hurt. 
Nonetheless, you ignored his harshness. You would save him, whether he wanted to be saved or not. You draped your body through the window, reaching out to him. You made an effort to keep most of your weight planted on the floor of the building, in case the scaffolding wasn’t stable enough to hold two people at once. 
“What do you think?” You replied, pure sarcasm dripping through your voice as you reached behind Jason and began fiddling with the rope around his wrists. 
The position put the two of you in intensely close proximity. Jason caught a whiff of your unique scent, the shower gel you used that mingled with your body’s natural oils; and he felt so painfully at home. For the first time that night, he held back tears. He couldn’t help but to lean his forehead on your shoulder, taking comfort in having you so near after being on edge and terrified for so many hours. You resisted the urge to run a hand through his hair, to cradle him and give him further comfort. You forced yourself to focus on the task at hand - getting him to safety. 
Behind you, at the very back of the room, Dick and Deathstroke wrestled with the remote for the explosives attached to the scaffolding. 
Just as you managed to get Jason’s wrists freed, Deathstroke hit the switch, and the bombs went off. 
… 
You winced loudly as Jason dabbed at the wound with disinfectant. 
“I would say sorry… but, you’ll thank me later when this isn’t swollen and leaking puss.” He told you, throwing you a small smirk. 
It was smug. It was the usual kind of humor that he gave you. 
It was comforting to know that every trace of the Jason you knew hadn’t been stolen by Deathstroke. 
You held your breath as he pressed down with the medicine-covered gauze again, drawing much less of a reaction out of you this time. 
“Great mental image, Jay.” You replied, your voice dull. It lacked any of the true bite you wanted to deliver in response to him. “I’m sure it’s such a turn-on thinking about my puss.” 
It was meant to be a joke. But even unconsciously, it was an acknowledgement of that dangerous line - the line between truly caring and just using someone for sex. The line between having someone in your life as a body to get off with, and being so… homely with them. 
You and Jason were towing that line dangerously. It was a thread that you were balancing on, and it would either break, or you would cross to the other side and be forever bonded to him. 
Jason shrugged. “Maybe I don’t have to be turned on by you all the time.” 
There was more stuck in his throat. Another dangerous acknowledgement of that line. 
‘Maybe I just have to care.’ 
Both of you lulled into silence because neither of you dared to say it. 
After a few moments, Jason put down the gauze and hesitated to reach for the tweezers. He knew that pulling the bullet out would be painful, but inevitable. It was a lot like the state of your relationship with him. Break it off, and find happiness elsewhere, or acknowledge this big thing swelling to fruition between the two of you. Have Jason fuck it up eventually. Painful, but inevitable. 
“You shouldn’t have to be hurt like this.” Jason said quietly. “You shouldn’t have gotten hurt for my sake.” 
There it was again - words with a dangerous double meaning. 
You looked up at him, pure pain knit across his face, and for a moment he looked from the tweezers to you and he could hardly stand holding your gaze. 
‘It’s worth it.’ You wanted to say. ‘For you, I’d bear any pain.’ 
The words lived and died behind your eyes, and your tongue decided on something else entirely. 
“It’s nothing.” You told him. 
You downplayed the pain, pretending that the injury was only a minor inconvenience for you. And in the grand scheme of life, it was. With time, it would heal. Losing Jason would be something you’d never heal from. 
Jason shook his head at this statement. 
He forced himself to reach for the tweezers then. He handed you his phone, a silent agreement that you would hold the light as steady as you could. He knew you well, too well, and he knew that you needed something else to focus on to push away the pain. He put his free hand on the plush of your stomach, pulling back slightly to hold the wound open while you held the light on it. 
When the sharp metal of the tweezers breached your wound, you wanted to swear. You wanted to call him an asshole as the pain shot through you. You wanted to scold him for leaving the Tower and being kidnapped in the first place. But you knew that even if it was playful or sarcastic, fueled by the bite of your pain, it was not what he needed to hear right now. So instead, you held your breath, and gripped his phone hard, keeping the light steady as you bared the sharp shocks of pain. 
After a moment of digging around that felt like an eternity, he pulled out the fragment and held it up to show you as you collapsed back against the bed, panting with tears stinging the edges of your eyes. 
“It’s not nothing.” He declared sharply. 
You couldn’t conjure a response. You knew he was right. And you didn’t want to be forced to admit it. 
Instead, you turned off the light from his phone and relaxed into the bed, closing your eyes as he walked around to the trashcan and threw out the bullet fragment. It fell into the bottom of the plastic wastebasket with a very small ‘ping’ - making you wonder how something so small could cause so much trouble. 
Jason quickly returned to you, dabbing more disinfectant into the wound in a way that made you groan and flex away from the touch. Once again, he did not apologize. 
There were a few moments of muddy silence with nothing but your slightly labored breathing, trying to contain your sounds of pain so as to not make him feel any further guilt about the whole incident. 
Your mind churned, and you couldn’t help the next words that came from your mouth. 
“I meant what I said.” You told him. 
At the sound of this, his hands immediately stilled. You felt his eyes on you, and you forced yourself to open your own and look up at him once again. He stared you down with intense examination. He looked for any ounce of falsity, any sign that you were lying, even posturing to make him feel better after everything that had happened. 
He didn’t find any. 
You thought he might acknowledge you, that he might say something back to return your mighty words. Instead, he simply reached for more gauze, and began putting a final bandage on your wound. 
… 
The explosion caused a sharp rattle through your ears. It shocked you and made you dizzy and put the whole world off-kilter. The only thing you could perceive past the mind-numbing hum in your brain was the feeling of Jason’s rough glove gripping tightly onto your wrist, so you gripped back as hard as you could. 
When you blinked open your eyes, you were half-hanging out of the open window, the edge of the floor cutting into your waist as you held onto Jason by nothing but his wrist. His whole body weight created a harsh burn, straining on the muscles in your shoulder as you watched him dangle hundreds of feet above the street. 
Panic flooded you. 
You scrambled to reach out with your other hand, and the moment you moved, your shirt slipped against the sleek, polished material of the floor and you began sliding out the window. You gasped and Jason stilled his panicked flailing immediately. 
“Don’t move!” He shouted. 
“Give me your other hand so I can pull you up!” You shouted back. 
Beyond the unpleasant hum of your eardrums rattling, you still heard chaos behind you. Gunshots, the grunts of fighting, Kory and Dick’s voices yelling. They were busy with Deathstroke, they couldn’t help you or Jason. 
Jason looked up at you with glassy eyes. 
He knew that with all his gear weighing him down, even with the training you had been doing, you wouldn’t be able to pull him up. Not by yourself. And if you weren’t careful, his body weight would just pull you out of the window and cause you to go tumbling down to your death along with him. 
When you saw that frown etch across his lips, that filthy look of dawning - you glared at him. 
“Give me your other hand!” You screamed, your voice raking across your throat like hot coals. A hot boiling rage at the fact that he seemed almost determined to die. 
There was one thing he was determined about. If he was going to die, he wasn’t going to take you down with him. 
His gloved wrist started to slip from your nervous, sweaty palm, and you tried hard to hold on tight. You formed large shards of ice, hoping you could create some kind of bond there by freezing your hand to his. But it would only be temporary with gravity trying to tear the two of you apart. 
“You have to drop me, Y/N.” He said, nothing but pure mourning on his lips. “I’m dead weight.” 
You both knew it was a horrendous double meaning. 
He thought he was a dead weight to your life. 
“No!” You immediately defied this thought, that feral rage ripping at your throat once again. “I’m gonna pull you up. I’m gonna pull you up!” 
You reached your other hand down and tightly wrapped both of your hands around his wrist, yanking upward. The harsh movement caused you to slide even further out the window. You were now dangling dangerously over San Francisco with only the thickness of your thighs giving you any real stability on the intensely high up floor. It made you dizzy, and the only thing you had to focus on were the wet wells of Jason’s eyes staring up at you. 
“It’s no use!” Jason said tearfully. 
You ignored him. 
You cast your chin over your shoulder, and began shouting. 
“Help me!” You screamed, trying desperately to get the attention of Dick or Kory. “Help me! Fuck!” 
“You have to let go.”
Jason’s words immediately shifted your focus back to him. 
But of course, you refused. 
“I’m not letting go of you!” You declared sharply. “Not that easily.” 
As he stared up at your tearful eyes, he knew that you meant it as more. 
Unfortunately, it was the one thing he was terrified of. 
He thought that you saw him as some shiny perfect thing, something good and worth having in your life. He thought that you were incapable of seeing the poison, the true fuck-up that he was. If you didn’t let go of him, sooner or later, just like everyone else in his life, you were going to get burned. 
So Jason did what he had to do. 
He began prying your fingers off his wrist, trying his best to keep you stable while he forced himself from your grip. 
“No!” You shrieked. “No, no, no-” 
You didn’t have much room to fight him about it without falling out of the window yourself. 
You made a move to readjust, to get a tighter grip on him - and it was the one deadly move that caused him to slip out of your touch completely. 
You were forced to watch on in chest clenching horror, blinking through heavy tears as he began hurtling toward the ground. 
… 
If not for Conner - a literal miracle - swooping in and saving Jason at the last second, then you would have spent the rest of your life regretting those moments, wondering what you could have done differently to save him. 
When Jason finished taping down the bandages, making sure the wound was clean and secure, he laid his palm flat on top of it. It was a kind of ‘kissing it better’ that instantly spread warmth curling through your gut. It was a touch so incredibly tender - especially compared to the heated, aggressive groping you were used to from him - that it caused a whimper from the back of your throat. 
You knew it was unlikely, but you hoped that he hadn’t heard it. 
“All done.” He said quietly. 
You instantly felt regret when he took his hand away and began tidying up the medical supplies. But you forced yourself to sit upright, now feeling only muscle soreness and a much duller pain coming from the area. You felt intensely thankful for his care as you pulled your shirt back down, righting your clothes back into place. 
“You’re free to go now.” Jason told you, his voice still low, as though a single decibel would shatter the delicate peace between the two of you. 
You felt your heart sink. 
In an instant, you understood what it was - he was concerned about your physical wellbeing, but he didn’t actually want to have you around. Just like his reaction to you showing up at the hostage exchange - he didn’t want your presence there. 
You heaved a sigh and got off the bed as Jason busied himself with gathering up the used gauze to throw it away. As you put your hand on the doorknob, you couldn’t quite bring yourself to leave. 
It was something else. 
It had to be something else. 
Jason hadn’t let himself drop off a building in some desperate ploy just to get away from you. He had been trying to save you. 
He was so utterly willing to give his life for yours. 
And now he was trying to back down from that. 
You turned and faced him, leaving the door closed. When he turned from ditching things in the wastebasket, he froze. He was entirely surprised that you were still there.
The two of you locked eyes, both staying still - like a predator and prey locked in a stalemate, wondering who would run first. 
In this situation, you weren’t sure who was the prey. 
You were both so vulnerable. 
Jason thought it would be selfish to get caught up in all of this, to finally admit those dangerous feelings he had for you. When he cared for things, he usually ended up breaking them. Of course, it was never on purpose - he was an idiot. Everything he touched, he fucked up. He had made that more than evident with his last braindead plan, the outing to prove that he was worthy of being Robin. Something that had gotten you shot, probably could have gotten you killed. 
If you stuck with him any longer, you probably would end up being killed. And he would never forgive himself for that. 
He would be better off ripping himself from your hold, as much as it hurt. Giving you a dose of that heartbreak now so that you could get over him and go after better things. 
As you stared at Jason, you could see all the pain boiling underneath his surface. You wondered what he was thinking, what the hell he was churning over in that intense brain of his - but you didn’t dare to ask. 
You knew that he needed to be held right now - in every sense of the word. You knew that he needed to be cared for the way he had cared for your wound, pushing past the pain in order to heal. You wondered if he would lay down and bear it or if he would continue to fight you. 
You were the one to bravely step forward. Though Jason was tempted to ask you to leave, that thing inside of him yearning to marinate in his isolation because he deserved it, he pushed it down. He let his hands naturally come to sit on the plush comfort of your waist as you put a gentle touch on both his shoulders, leaning into his body ever so slightly. 
You laid your forehead on his cheek, right next to that ugly bruise that had been left on him, and he let out a contented sigh as he felt your warmth envelope him. For the first time since his feet had touched the ground, he felt calm. He felt safe. 
You smoothed a hand across his shoulder, and raised your head, using your touch to gently tip his face toward yours. He quickly realized that your intention was to kiss him. And something ached in his heart - something painful and longing. He knew that it would not be needy and haste with the intention of pile-driving toward sex like your other kisses had been. He knew that it would be the metamorphosis of your relationship that he was not prepared to go through. 
He nuzzled along your forehead, gently stopping you. 
“Please don’t do this.” He murmured quietly into your skin. 
He knew that it would break him. 
He knew that this was the moment - like Gatsby reaching up toward the stars - this would be the moment that he was tied to you forever, damned by his love for you. Only, much different than Gatsby, he wasn’t destined for some grant fate if he didn’t have you. He was on a one way path to a messy death, and he was determined not to take you down with him. 
Tears pricked the edges of his eyes at the thought. 
You pulled back, just enough to properly look him in the eyes, and your own tears formed when you saw that pathetic puppy dog looking back at you. 
“Why not?” You demanded, much sharper than you intended. You knew he was fragile and you didn’t want to upset him any further than he already was. 
“You know why.” He replied, his voice barely scraping above a whisper as the emotion clutched at his throat. 
Jason wanted to hold onto you forever, but he was also a realistic person. He expected that any minute now, you would rip away from his arms and charge out the door, entirely angry with him, and this would finally be over. You would finally be safe from him - safe from any nasty fate his life could conjure up for you. 
You hated what he was asking of you - asking you not to care for him anymore. As if you could somehow switch it off. Impossible. 
“I meant what I said.” You repeated yourself, still entirely firm in this conviction. “I’m not gonna let you go that easily.” 
You leaned in, planting your lips on his in a light kiss. A pained sigh ripped through you when he didn’t make any moves to kiss you back. 
“Jason, please.” You whimpered out desperately. “If you get to bandage my bullet wound, then I get to do this.” 
Jason wanted to spell it all out for you, plain and dirty. He wanted to get angry, he wanted to scream. He wanted to rush along the inevitable. He wanted to tell you what a poison he was to the world, that he deserved to die and you deserved better things. But he had the utmost feeling that you wouldn’t listen. 
“Please, stop pushing me away.” You whispered against his lips. 
Instead, he listened to your plea. He let himself indulge in this selfish softness for once. 
He reached up and grabbed your jaw, pulling you into a firmer kiss, declaring every ounce of passion and terror that he was feeling in those moments. You answered it all right back - digging your fingers into the shoulders of his shirt, letting out a hot huff against his cheek as you leaned into his body. 
He would never be perfect - but he was yours.
...
Final note: yes, I used to be @/pinkchubbiebunnie. That is still my username on AO3, so if you saw this fic posted on there, it is my fic. Please do not accusing me of plagiarising fics if you see this, because this is my own fic. This is my new blog. Feel free to follow me if you’re interested in my fanfiction and thoughtful discussions of the media that I enjoy.
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sunny-day-dream · 2 years
Text
Or, and hear me out here:
Being pressed up against nearest flat surface roughly while they grind against you from behind, panting against your neck while making the most sinful of noises, hands gripping at your hips hard enough to leave bruises that they'll regret when they see them the next day (they'll kiss them better afterwards, paying special attention to the ones littering your chest and thighs)
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adonisbeloveds · 11 months
Text
Sun and Moondrop with a sibling reader
-Reader: no pronouns used + no gender implied -It/they for Sun and Moon
Requested: No/Yes
Warnings: None Disclamer: Characters personality, looks, ect may be different from canon due to either hc or author has just forgotten.
A/N: This one was not my best and was a little shorter than i hoped it would have been but yet again brain didn't work a lot so sorry but i hope you like it!
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^ Made by me
-☼ When you where introduced to Sun it was beaming with excitement, after the workers gave them the simple info on your job and that you where made to help all the kids with anxiety, fidgiting, not wanting to be around others, ect. There was a spot made in the nap room called the quiet corner, its for all the kids who want to be somewhere calm and just read, play or talk without all the energetic kids around. -☼ When you got introduced to the kids the older and calmer kids loved spending time with you, playing with you, singing with you, fidgiting with you, everything they wanted to do you gladly joined in with them, Sun loved that you got along with the kids as well as they did. "Alright kids, its snack time!" Sun said packing up the puppet show stuff "sunbeam can you go get the kids from the quiet corner? thank you!" Sun asked, you nodded and went to get the kids for snack time. When you got back with the children you helped Sun line the kids up and handed them their plates and got ready to hand out the juice boxes or water. After all the kids got their food they sat down at the tables and Sun opened its checklist "sunbeam can you go get the blankets and pillows please?" it asked, you nodded and went to set up the sleeping area.
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^ Made by me
-☾ Moon was surprised to see a new animatronic but after Sun briefly told it that you where their new sibling moon was happy to have another family member and a new helping hand that was like them. After small introductions you two went to put the children to sleep, after you made sure all the children where asleep Moon and you carefully sat down and talked about the children and what your job was. -☾ They talked to you about what to do after naptime was over and about the other animatronics in the pizza plex, you found out that there was this one trouble maker called Gregory that got banned from the pizza plex and how Moon had a small hatred towards him.
As you two talked softly about the pizza plex Moon came up with a idea "star do you want to draw with me?" you smiled brightly and nodded, very excited that you get to draw with your sibling. Moon came back with the paper and crayons, you both started drawing with the soft sound of humming coming from Moon, even though the lighting was dim it was light enough for you to see what you where doing. Some time pasted and you where both done with your drawings, Moon drew you sitting on a cresent moon "can i see your drawing star?" you smiled and gave the drawing of it, Sun and you hanging out in a field of flowers, Moon cooed and gave you a gentle hug "it looks amazing star, we can show it to Sun after the kids wake up." After some time the kids started waking up and going to sit with Moon and you, after a couple of minutes all the children woke up, Moon got up and stretched "okay little ones, Moony has to go now but Sunny will be back" the children softly whinned about not getting to spend time with Moon but it quieted them after saying that their caregivers will be here shortly to pick them up.
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glambots · 7 days
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I just saw requests were open, I had been waiting patiently to send you this one!
Could I get something for Sun, Moon, Freddy, and Monty with a pre-transition gn or transmasc y/n who doesn't like being found physically attractive due to dysphoria and is comforted by being loved for things other than their appearance? Yes I know this is very specific.
why would you call me out like this (also I'm sorry this took me so long aauuguughghgh OTL)
cw: mentions/implications of body image dysphoria
🎩Glamrock Freddy + Transmasc!Reader:🎩
He is sorry that you feel that way. But as much as he does find you attractive, which is a lot, it is not just your..."physical attributes" that he is attracted to. There is a lot about you that he likes! Like, your personality, of course. And your passion. And--there is much more, more than he could ever list. No matter what you looked like, he knows that he would still love you regardless, because you are you. You are His Superstar, and you always will be.
🐊Montgomery Gator + Transmasc!Reader:🐊
Well, that doesn't make a lotta sense, because he thinks you're pretty damn good-lookin'! But really, he likes you for a lot of reasons, not just cause you've got a pretty face. You're like a...safe place for him. He can let down his walls when he's with you. And it doesn't matter what you look like, cause you'll always have the same heart, and that's what matters, right? You're, like, his rock, and he's your Rock...star. Hey, that sounded pretty cool!
☀️Sunnydrop + Transmasc!Reader:☀️
Too late! He already thinks you're the cutest thing he's ever seen. But if he really had to choose something else...it'd be everything else! No, seriously. There's nothing about you that he doesn't like. (Well, okay, that's an exaggeration--but it doesn't matter!) He's crazy about you, from your head to your heart, to everything beyond and in-between! Not to sound too sappy, but...you're his little ray of sunshine. And always will be~!
🌙Moondrop + Transmasc!Reader:🌙
Boo. That's no fun. He likes your pretty face. But...there is more. Much more. That he likes about you. You see him. You know him. And that is enough to make him love you. That is enough to keep him wrapped around your little finger. And it will remain that way, no matter how you change on the outside. Because he sees you. He knows you. And, no matter what, you will stay his dear little shining star. That is all that matters. He's yours and you're his.
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neblina-magico · 3 months
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Sleeping In The Sun
(Chapter 4)
You were desperate for a job so you applied to be the daycare Attendants handler! you have no clue what you're signing yourself into but at least you don't have to pay rent now!
Moon hates you, Sun doesn't know how to feel about you and you're just trying to survive.
--—————————————————————————
“Now who might you be Starlight”
You suck in a breath pressing the star pillow close to your chest, your eyes wide in panic. The voice was deep and ominous, menacing, and quiet. You feel your face grow cold and a shiver trails down your spine.
You breathe slowly, quietly as if that helps you seem smaller, and saves you from any danger.
“Saw you talking to Sunny and thought ‘Why not see you with my own eyes’ and well here I am!” The deep raspy voice says with a laugh. You close your eyes sucking in a breath, trying to ease yourself at least a little. With trembling hands and only a piece of confidence left in you, you open your mouth.
“Wh— He–!” Your voice barely comes out in a whisper, most of what you said sounded more like squeaks than anything else. You collect some fabric of your pants into a fist, red and gray fill your insides burning yet chilling you at the same time its like a fire pit building up at your chest yet at the same time there's ice cubes running along your stomach and back.
You hear a giggle, a chill overcomes your entire body. You feel lengthy cold fingers wrap around your waist, you suck in a sharp breath, your breathing becoming slow and shallow as the figure turns you around to face them. You come face to face with a two toned shirt, half in black and the other in white with black buttons, the pillow that once resembled a star looks more like a squashed water balloon. You try to suppress your fear as the figure bends down to meet you with its glowing red eyes, the kind you'll only see in nightmares or nightly hallucinations. They pierce into you seemingly reading into your soul, as the figure looks into your eyes the crescent moon face smiles widely.
“What beautiful eyes, it's easy to see your fear through them” Moondrop. Your throats dry, your chest feels tight, restrained and toyed in bondage. You sigh telling yourself that there's no point in living with this fear, that the past doesn't have to continue affecting you years later. Perhaps it's best to slow down, take a step back and rethink this situation. As far as you know Moondrop probably just wanted to introduce himself, hopefully.
“You look like a wanna be Moon for The Legend of Zelda '' you mumble looking at Moondrop in the eyes, you probably would have survived the Victorian Era honestly. A blank stare looking back at another blank stare. You pull the most awkward nervous smile you can conjure up and start slowly backing away towards the exit of the place.
“Where are you going? Don't think you could leave after saying something like that!” Moondrop says making his way at you. ‘Though this conversation ended the moment it started’ you think to yourself as you continue out of the nap time place thing.
“I think…yes” you say making a run across the daycare, in your rush you spot Sun playing with some cubes, stacking and unstacking them. Hearing your loud footsteps, he turns his head to look at you as you rush past him giving a smile and wave goodbye.
Needless to say he was confused by your theatrics till he followed where you came from and saw Moon standing at the entrance of the naptime tent holding the star pillow you were once holding. Well it doesn't look much like a perfect star, more like a deformed one, though that's nothing they can fix. They both look at each other with a shrug going back to what they were doing before you came in.
You push open the doors from the daycare, letting them close behind you as you try your hardest to catch your breath. Feeling your neck burn up and feel the dryness that built up in there, your heart hitting your chest like a punch with each intake.
“What the FUCK was that, What the Fuck was that.” your voice breaks from the heavy breathing. Catching your breath you stand up right and walk towards the door off to the side marked with the “Staff Only” label. Taking your security card out from your pocket you tap it on the handle and open the door. Walking past the little staff lounge area and to the elevator hidden near the restroom swiping your card again the elevator door opens. There's only one way the elevator goes and that's dowwwwwwwwwwwwn.
Sighing you lean on the railings of the elevator feeling the constant state of fear and running catching up to you physically. Felling i wash of blanket like weight drap over your shoulders and eyelids, a lot had happen in so little time and with you state of panic you had allowed time for your brain and body to connect properly. Now youre paying for it through sheer exhaustion. Youre aware its a natural response but even so it never gets old.
The elevator door opens and you walk into youre new home, leaving your shoes at the entrance you drag yourself into you room. Its beautiful with all the space imagery but in you tired state you simply walk over to the closet and unhook some soft pajamas while thinking of something simple to eat. In your fresh gear you walk to the kitchen, preparing some yogurt with cereal and stand there at the counter eating.
You wash the dishes, your brain feels empty, the only things in there are thoughts of the events that happened. It felt to fast, too fast.
“Fucking wannabe zelda moon and his fucking freaky red ass eyes and his assery of a colourful personality” You mumble to yourself washing the bowl and spoon that yiu used to eat. On your way to the bedroom you keep mumbling, “pinche luna, jackass” nonstop.
You turn off the light, lifting the very nice and soft blankets from the bed and sliding into the bed. You let out a relieved and deep sigh feeling the soft blankets caress your body, comfort hitting you at an instant.
“I hope the sun rises and the moon sets nicely, tomorrow will be better” you whisper to yourself as you slip into some much needed sleep.
Tomorrow will be better
——————————————————————————
Haven’t posted in a while, sorry for the really late update life’s been wild. Hope you enjoyed Chapter 4 of Sleeping In The Sun
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tenpintsof-sundrop · 4 months
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Something I randomly found on someone's fanfiction rules while browsing a tag this morning??
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Fellas is it gay to use YOUR NAME
(And I think by M/N they mean Man's Name??? Like WHAT)
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capri851 · 2 years
Link
“Taking Care of Infants 101″ - Chapter 4
it is currently 3:58 A.M., but I was focused on writing, so here we are 🙂
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ablobwhowrites · 4 months
Note
Can u write a Yandere!Fnaf 1 x Reader fanfiction? It can be like 20 to 30 chapters or maybe less if that makes you comfortable.
so I don't think I could run a series that long on tumblr but I can probably try but for now, here's some shit post and a small bit of headcanons with m/n and gn y/n
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*glamrock Freddy trying to drive*
Gregory: "what happens if you press the breaks and gas at the same time?"
Minimum wage m/n: "the car takes a screenshot"
Glamrock Freddy on the verge of crying: "your making me nervous!"
Y/n's live reaction to seeing Monty running straight at them
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Sundrop: "your my favorite friend m/n, I don't imagine what I would do without you!"
M/n: "I would be home, unconscious on my floor after this hell of a shift, I know that for truth"
Employeer: "come on, working in our underground pizzeria isn't so bad"
Minimum wage y/n: "balloras little gremlins of fucking side animatronics tried to drag me into there area the moment my shift was over"
Y/n: "so Vanessa, heard we got a some dj animatronic, hope it's one bolted to the floor at lea-" *sees dj music man that's currently not operating yet* "...i wish I could quit that job but this is the only thing that gives me free food"
Vanessa: "don't you steal the food?"
Y/n: "not everyone has the time to buy food after work Vanessa"
moon: "m/n I see those bags under your eyes, you haven't been sleeping have you?"
M/n: "I'm fine, I'm running in 18 hours of red bull, monster and something I found in my car before I walked into work....i can't feel my body"
M/n to the mapbots the first time he saw them.
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Some supermarket worker: "Mr/mx y/n (or) m/n, can you please come to the front? A special guest is waiting for you"
Monty: "I got lost..."
Y/n (or) m/n: "I didn't even bring you here!"
Hey guys so I know I've been gone off a bit but shit dude, it's like the AO3 writers curse with me, a lot of stuff is going on and well all I wanted to say is that I'm extremely grateful for everyone of my followers and mutuals for being with me on my journey from new to old follower, I hope that everyone of you have a wonderful Christmas or any culture you celebrate on this day or tomorrow and I'll try to be more frequent with my uploads but for now, I love each and everyone of you guys who's been with me through my Tumblr journey and I hope you have a wonderful day and a wonderful christmas.
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jadeddangel · 2 months
Note
Could you do some head cannons for Sundrop, Moondrop and eclipse x handler and general technician reader (preferably trans masc reader but GN is fine too)
OF COURSE NEW FRIEND!!
The drops with a Trans-Masc handler
Art is not mine
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Sundrop:
As soon as you meet him he's immediately asking your Pronouns and what you wanna be addressed as
He made you a little pin with your Pronouns and preferred name
He gives you little pictures of him and the other drops that you can cut away from the paper and put in the back of a clear phone case
He gets jealous, like super easy
Oh? Your giving a kid a talk about not bullying? He's behind you waiting for you to be free
He purposefully gets dirty just so you wash him
He tries to convince you to stay in the daycare over night
Literally just a whiny baby
He crouched down when he talks to you since he's almost 10 ft tall (a little over 3 meters)
If you don't give him attention when he wants it and your in the daycare alone, he will bite you
Not even sexually just bite you to get your attention
"Oh Mr. Attendent?! Mr.attendent?" Sun called out trying to get your attention.
Your music was in your headphones and was so loud you couldn't hear him.
Next thing you know you feel teeth pinch into your arm, not hard enough to draw blood but it still hurt
"OW SUN WHAT THE FU -" "No cussing in the daycare!" Sun cut you off happily before shoving a drawing in your face "anyway! Look what I drew!!"
Yeaaaa, there was a reason your pay was so high
Moondrop:
Tried to get you to join nap time the first time he met yoy but quickly adapted to leaving you out of it
If your wearing a binder he insists you take a break with it off during naptime
He mostly just sits quietly while you do what your doing
If your drawing his eyes make the perfect light that won't wake the kids up
He doesn't really care if you cuss while the children are asleep as long as you keep your voice down
Tends to look over your shoulder when your on your phone
He doesn't struggle to get your attention since all he has to do is close his eyes and it's noticeable
Moon sighed shaking his head before closing his glowing red eyes.
You pouted "Moon I was coloring. What do you need?" You asked quietly
Moon opened his eyes. " Nap time is ending soon if you want to put your binder on," Moon reminded
Overall as long as you behave he behaves
Eclipse:
Knew all about you from what sun and moon had told him
He likes to wander around the pizza plex with you after hours
He's over 16ft don't ask me how, just take my word as gospel
He only lets you cuss if you hurt yourself if you just cuss freely he may let it go once or twice but if it gets repetitive he gives you a warning
It's not a nice warning either
"Oh dear friend, it seems like you can't keep the cussing under wraps, and although it is after hours and we are not in the daycare, remember, your words matter, and they will get you hurt if you don't stop ..... anyway!"
Be scared shitless if this man threatens you
He'll act like the warning never happened as long as you behave
But if you don't, well, I hope you have life insurance
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pluck-heartstrings · 2 months
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He’s just fascinated by how soft you are
(This is EXTREMELY indulgent, please forgive me)
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sundrop-writes · 4 months
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Your First Kiss With Jason Todd
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Jason Todd x Gender Neutral Reader
Summary:
Jason always thought he hated you. He did hate you.
Until he didn't.
Until his love for you ruined him in ways he couldn't even imagine.
Jason Todd x Gender Neutral Reader. Frenemies to Lovers. Pure Angst (Hurt, No Comfort). Set during Season 3.
Word Count: 8,200
DC Titans Masterlist | AO3 Link
Detailed warnings and author's notes below the cut.
Warnings: This fic is almost entirely angst - hurt, no comfort. This fic does not have a happy ending!!! So be warned of that before you enter here. Jason and the reader are described as ‘hating’ each other, but they are more like frenemies/annoyances - they have a playful banter (at the time, even they don’t know that they like arguing because it’s sexual tension and passion for each other); the reader is completely gender neutral - the only pronouns used for the reader are you/yours; this is mostly written from Jason’s POV (which is where most of the angst comes from); Jason describes himself as a ‘zombie’ or ‘half-alive’ - but he is fully alive and has all of his mental faculties, he is just freaked out about the fact that he was resurrected; the reader does not have any meta powers, but is described as being very good at combat (this does not denote the reader’s body type); mentions of sex and some sexual themes - but there is no outright smut and no detailed descriptions of sex; mentions of negative stereotypes surrounding frat boys/frat houses - including STDs and group sex (mentioned in a negative light); mentions of Jason masturbating (and thinking about the reader while doing it); mentions of Jason’s canon trauma (being kidnapped and tortured by Deathstroke, dropped off the building); mentions of Jason being killed by the Joker (and being ressurected by Crane); mentions of the reader mourning Jason’s death; mentions of drugs and drug addiction (based around the canon storyline of the anti-fear gas); mentions of Jason’s trauma surround his mother’s drug addiction; mentions of Jason killing Hank (as in the canon); the reader is kidnapped (by Crane or someone who works for Crane) and held hostage, and later rescued by Jason; somewhat graphic descriptions of violence (Jason beating up Crane, other background instances), gory descriptions of a death toward the end (mentions of acid burns and choking on non-breathable air); major character death - the reader character does die. Like I said - no happy ending. Sorry not sorry.
A/N: This is set during Season 3 - and this does feature spoilers for Season 3 if you haven't seen Titans before. So if you wanna watch the show spoiler free, definitely avoid this fic. I was imagining this to be set around episode 6 or episode 7, before Crane's plan to use the ice cream factory is taken down by the Titans, but obviously Jason breaking away from Crane's control so early goes against the canon - so there's that. Also, if you wanna pair some music with this for something truly heartbreaking, I would highly recommend the classic Running Up That Hill by Kate Bush, or the highly underrated Colorado Sunrise by 3OH!3 (the lyrics are way more depressing than people realize, and I love it as a whump song. oomf). I also feel like the song Cloud 9 by Beach Bunny would go so well with this fic, but in like - the most devastating way. I haven't written something this cruel since I wrote Ghosting and I had so much fun doing it. You can't leave me alone with whump for too long, I turn into a monster. I need to go back to smut again quickly lmao.
...
Jason Todd was in love with you. 
It was something that he hated himself for. Actually, it was one of the most infuriating, devastating facts in the world. But it was true. You were someone who was so entirely amazing. You were beautiful - literally the hottest person Jason had ever met who wasn’t photoshopped or catered to be some unrealistic daydream. You were clever and smart and strong. You could kick anybody’s ass on any day of the week and still have enough energy left to tell them how much of an idiot they were and list all of the reasons why. 
And you would definitely never love Jason back. There wasn’t a snowball’s chance in hell that he could ever have someone like you. 
So he kept all of that stupid, idiotic love to himself. It was a secret that he had sworn to die with - and technically, he already had. 
Jason tried not to linger on the very fucked up, seemingly impossible fact that he had come back from the dead. And now he was existing as some weird, fucked up zombie thing - resurrected from having his skull caved in by the Joker to do Jonathan Crane’s bidding. This definitely wasn’t what Jason would have wanted out of a renewed life - but hey: when an Arkham prisoner gives you rotten lemons. 
When Jason wasn’t beating down drug dealers, stealing money, or strapping bombs to people - when he was trying his hardest not to focus on the fact that he had died and he was now living some strange half-life, reliant on Crane’s drugs, he was thinking about you. He thought about you a lot. 
He hadn’t come into contact with you since his strange foray back into the land of the living. That was probably for the best. He knew that you had freshly come back to Gotham, upon Dick’s request. Nightwing had called for backup from all the ex-Titans to help end Red Hood’s reign of terror. Jason wanted to stay as far away from you as possible. 
Genuinely, he didn’t want you getting caught in the crossfire of whatever Crane was planning. He wished you had stayed out of Gotham, but he knew that you were too loyal, too good not to come to the aid of the Titans when they needed you. He couldn’t reveal himself to you just for a taste of nostalgia - one last argument before you sold him down the river for good. But fuck - he thought about you a lot. 
When the two of you had first met, you were the last person he ever thought that he would surrender that stupid, soft label of love to. Even months into first knowing you - he would have said that he hated you. He would have told anybody that he found you to be the most annoying person on earth. 
Your relationship used to be the worst kind of dance. 
Every single time that Jason opened his mouth, you said something to contradict him. To a point, he believed that you didn’t even fully stand behind the things you said - you just enjoyed arguing against him. That you did it for sport. You used every single last bit of your time and energy to get under his skin. From mocking him to calling him a fuckboy to prodding at his grammar, poking holes in his points by smugly correcting him. He always found you to be the most infuriating person in any room. But it seemed that the more frustrated he got with you, the more cool headed you remained. 
He tried to mock you back, and you shrugged it off. Every time he became visibly annoyed in your presence - you giggled. He wanted to strangle you. 
And it was one fated day that he realized the line between heat fueled by frustration and heat fueled by lust truly weren’t that different. 
… 
“Jason! I thought I smelled you coming down the hall!” 
Jason groaned when he heard you make this comment. 
He thought that for once, he could have some peace to train alone - but it appeared that he would have no such luck. You were already in the training room, holding a long bo-staff as you ran some drills. Apparently, you were eager to exercise your mouth too - already whipping off clever insults the minute that Jason entered the room. 
When all he could muster was a glare in your direction, you let out a giggle. His blood boiled. 
“Between that god awful Axe body wash and that alcohol based aftershave that you like to drown yourself in, you smell like a walking frat house.” You continued, blabbering on even though Jason had made no efforts to engage you. At least not yet. “Just throw in some Busch Light and weed, and I might be able to catch gonorrhea just from the stench.” 
That was the nerve that hooked Jason into the conversation. First of all - he smelled fucking delightful. He always made hygiene one of his personal priorities. He was absolutely not one of those guys with crusty, sweaty balls. And second of all - he was not one of those STD spreading manwhores. He was clean in all senses. He always used a condom. 
“Sounds like you’ve got experience with that.” Jason quipped back. 
He looked to you for some kind of reaction, some inkling that he had gotten under your skin even a fraction of the way that you did his. His movements were rough with annoyance as he began wrapping his knuckles with tape so he could have a few rounds with the heavy bag - mostly out of a need to pound out his frustration on something. He was getting too angered with your presence in the room and not wanting to snap and take it out on you. (He already had enough on his record with Bruce, and despite popular opinion - he was trying to improve.) 
When you weren’t quick to respond, Jason continued. 
“You used to letting frat boys all over you? You seem like the type of person who would enjoy a good, sloppy frat house train. Twenty guys, one after the other, none of them knowing your name, just because you’re so needy for a good fuck.” 
Jason grinned, feeling like he had won this conversation with the essence of shock alone. 
But no. As always, you remained cool. You grinned right back at him, stepping toward him, crowding into his personal space as you said your next words in a low, smooth voice. 
“Sounds like you spend an awful lot of time picturing me running a train.” You smirked. “Is that why you’re always so late getting up in the morning? You wake up and the first thing you do is get a hand on your dick, imagining me getting fucked by a lineup of guys? Probably just wishing that one of them was you.” 
Jason’s face fell flat. 
You were so strikingly confident in your words that it made his stomach twist. Facing him down, speaking such filthy words without flinching - embarrassment and heat collided inside of him. Even more so with what you did next. 
You put a hand out in front of your crotch, mimicking the motions of jacking off while you mocked him in a broken voice. 
“Oh, oh fuck Y/N! Come on! Take my sloppy, frat house cock!” 
You then mocked a whiny series of moans that must have been Jason’s fake orgasm - and while Jason’s insides bubbled with a confusing heat, you quickly dissolved off into laughter. 
“Shut up.” Jason snapped, forcing his eyes down to focus on the process of taping himself up - praying that you wouldn’t see the heat that had spread across his cheeks. “You’re the fucking worst.” 
“Only when I’m with you.” You replied, blowing him a kiss - to which he stuck his middle finger up at you. 
He was eternally thankful when you went back to your own training in silence, only taking occasional glances up in his direction. 
… 
After that point, Jason had to admit to himself that he was attracted to you, at the very least. He could no longer deny that you were insanely attractive; you were a very, very hot person. And somehow, even past your annoying habits, he was being drawn into the orbit of your gorgeous looks and your wonderfully cocky, filthy mouth. 
But he still hated you. He definitely still hated you. 
He hated it even more when you became right - and you did become the object of some of his more heated fantasies. He became downright annoyed at the times he had his hand around his cock and imagined himself hate fucking you - imagined forcing every cocky retort out of your mouth, imagining you breathless and needy beneath him, begging for more with every hard push of his hips. 
He hated how everything changed after Doctor Light. 
Jason wasn’t thinking about your stupid beautiful cocky mouth after that. His mind was full of glass and he was being shredded from the inside out. He came home broken. After everything that happened with Deathstroke and Doctor Light - he was some fragile bird; some chewed up, used, pitiful thing. He didn’t have the energy to fight you anymore, not even for sport. 
So after he was rescued, still floating in numbness, he didn’t know what to do when you burst into his room unannounced. You practically shoved the door off its hinges, and stormed across the room toward him - tears hot in your eyes. You pounded curled fists against his chest, screaming at the top of your lungs. Half of your words were static in his ears, but the tone of your voice pierced through his heart like an arrow. You called him stupid, asking where in his empty head he had gotten the idea to go off by himself. 
Jason didn’t have it in him to fight you. So he broke down. 
He felt like the world’s biggest idiot for crying in front of you. But his throat was tight and he choked on the tears - he was too tired. He just couldn’t hold them back. He screamed back, and asked you to lay off. To get off his fucking back. 
You looked shocked. Like you had swallowed a piece of glass. 
You surprised him when you uncurled your fists and wrapped the most tender, gentle hands around his back, and for the first time since he had known you - you embraced him in a hug. He was weak and he needed it more than he was willing to admit, so he let you. He sobbed against your neck, his own cries too loud that he missed the timid sound of your apology. 
That wasn’t the only time you surprised him that week. 
He knew it was because he was some broken little bird, but you started taking care of him. You brought him plates of food without being asked, and when he attempted to shove them away - you refused. You told him to eat before you had to ‘shove it down his fucking throat’. 
You didn’t mock him. You didn’t correct him. And you surprised him even more when you turned the sharpness of your tongue on the others when they tried attacking Jason. They accused him of planting booze in Hank’s room or drawing crosses on Rachel’s mirror to fuck with her, among other things. And you popped veins in your neck going on a winding rant about how stupid and baseless their accusations were. 
Jason wasn’t sure if you knew it, but you jumping to his defense wrapped him in a blanket of protection that he had never before felt. It was so entirely strange, but welcomed coming from you. Especially because he knew that it was genuine. He knew that you didn’t have any ulterior motives for doing this - for some reason, you just wanted to help him. 
When you extended an invitation toward him to come with you as the group dispersed, torn apart by Dick’s nasty, festering secret - Jason felt welcomed by you. He knew that the dynamic between the two of you was changing at a breakneck speed, and he had to embrace it. He found himself eager to follow the weird, newly developing kinship that he had with you rather than wanting to stay in the empty coldness of the Tower with a brooding Dick. 
From there, it was really difficult for Jason to pin down the exact moment that his feelings transitioned toward you from casual lust to something more. He couldn’t tell exactly when it turned into that panic-inducing, ‘oh my god, I’m fucked’ feeling of being in love. After leaving San Francisco, during the entirety of the time that the two of you were in Gotham together, your relationship remained completely platonic. 
It was a few short weeks spent kicking ass as the best vigilante duo the city had ever seen, but there wasn’t a single moment Jason could point to where the two of you lit up with that romantic spark. It wasn’t some romcom bullshit come to life. It was just the two of you being friendly for once. The two of you helping each other survive. 
Back then - Jason wanted you, badly. Even if he didn’t know just how badly, he wasn’t going to fuck up the whole dynamic just to get laid. He felt safe with you. He kicked ass with you. He was good with you. And during that short time - he was happy. So he wasn’t going to do anything to risk that happiness. Happiness was too rare for him. So why the hell would he try putting the moves on you, scare you away, and fuck it all up? 
… 
A little slice of that happiness came in the form of Hal’s Diner. It was a place in downtown Gotham, open twenty four hours, and you and Jason had gotten into the habit of stopping there after your patrols. 
The two of you would kick some ass - break the legs of some drug dealers, make sure that women got home safe if they were walking late at night, keep the streets a little safer. And then you would change out of your patrol outfits and head to the diner, just as the sun was rising over the scummy streets of Gotham. You would get breakfast and Jason would get dinner. He would steal one of your eggs and you would take half his burger, and you would always comment about him putting way too much ketchup on his plate. 
It was harmony. 
“You know, every time I see you make a grown man cry, it brings me such intense joy.” Jason grinned as he said this, reminiscing about a beautiful moment from earlier in the night. 
He spoke about it in the same manner that someone might reminisce about seeing a relative or a cute puppy. But this was natural for the two of you - since you had taken up vigilantism as a duo, violence was a sweet art for the two of you. 
“Well, if he would have left that girl alone the first time I asked, I wouldn’t have broken his arm.” You shrugged, speaking very casually about it yourself. 
You then picked a piece of bacon up off your plate and took a bite, grinning at Jason fondly. You did appreciate it when he complimented your skills. 
Jason chuckled. 
“You know, it is nice to see you using your powers for good instead of evil.” He commented. 
“My powers?” You parroted back, your mouth half busy with chewing, your words slightly muffled. 
You didn’t have any metahuman powers, so this comment did leave you slightly confused. 
“Yeah.” He nodded, entirely confident in the statement he had to follow. “Your endless amount of energy to harass people and be endlessly annoying. The powers you used to spend all your time using on me.” 
“You used to deserve it.” You were quick with your tongue as usual, not missing a beat with this statement. 
Jason’s only rebuttal was to pick up a french fry - one not doused in ketchup - and throw it at your head. You flinched slightly when it bounced off your forehead - but when it landed in your lap, you easily picked it up and put it in your mouth, not thinking twice about doing so as you tossed Jason a wicked grin. 
That. That must have been the moment. 
That was the moment he realized that he was truly in love with you. You grinning at him from across the table, your smile lighting up your whole face, playing around with him like he actually made you happy. Like he could spend the rest of his life making you happy. 
That’s why it hurt so much more when your phone buzzed on the table a few minutes later. When you told him that it was the Titans - Gar in trouble. That’s why it hurt so fucking much when you left. 
Jason knew, in hindsight, that he should have gone with you. But he flailed like a rabbit caught in a snare, and rather than just agreeing with you, he felt the trap tightening around him, and he opted to chew off his own foot rather than simply letting you help him free. 
He stupidly argued that it was some test from Dick. That the Titans could deal with their own problems. Jason knew that deep down, he was still tender from everything that had happened - Dick dropping him, even by accident. The accusations, the secrets. The rejection. He felt like he was laying down a line - he was letting you make a choice. 
Him or the Titans. 
But it shouldn’t have been a choice. It was Gar. Jason should have stood by his friend. He should have gone with you. 
Deep down, Jason feared that if he did go with you - the Titans wouldn’t want him back. He feared another cutting rejection. They would simply bench him again, they wouldn’t even need him to help save Gar. They wouldn’t want him to help. He was useless, after all. He was careless and stupid. That was why he needed you to choose him. To stay. 
That was what his mind was screaming out as you looked at him, disappointment flooding your eyes as you questioned him about Gar, about going back to the Titans. 
Stay. He silently begged. Pick me. 
And watching you snatch up your jacket in a huff and get up from the table, your food barely touched - his eyes boring into your back as you retreated - it was like having his heart carved out of his chest. And because he was so fucked up, he just sat there. He couldn’t bring himself to do anything about it. He didn’t chase you. 
He let you go. 
Having you suddenly disappear from his life was like missing a limb. Jason was constantly aching around your non-presence, constantly missing you. He felt torn up from the inside out, wondering if his frayed nerve endings would ever heal themselves. When he went to Donna’s funeral, he stared at you from across the tarmac - telling himself that if you even so much as glanced in his direction, he would cross that sickly one hundred foot black sea and talk to you. He would make the leap and apologize. 
But you were fettered and stubborn and you kept your head straight. You knew it was the ultimate punishment not to acknowledge him. So the moment that the plane took off, Jason shoved on his helmet and sped off on his bike.
He easily became numb after that. 
He went back to Bruce - to lay low and lick his wounds, or because it was the only place he knew, he wasn’t sure. He tried to be a Robin that wasn’t with you. It didn’t work. He felt more broken than ever. It was cheesy, pathetic bullshit - but he talked about you in therapy. Leslie encouraged him to reach out to you, but every time Jason’s fingers hovered over your contact in his phone, his hands shook, and all he remembered was the look of pure scorn you had given him before you snatched up your things and left the diner that day. 
He thought of you as he suited up to go after the Joker. He considered how easy it would be for the two of you to take down the stupid clown together - how flawlessly the two of you worked as a team. 
Jason thought of you as he drew his last breath, soaked in blood and struggling past the world-ending pain. He wondered, in a haze, if you were warm in your bed in The Tower while he was pressed into the cold ground, taunted by the laughter that rung in his ears. 
… 
Jason didn’t know how hard you cried for him when you heard the news of his death. 
You wouldn’t have dared to say that the hole in the middle of your chest was caused by love - caused by the heartbreak of a lover being stolen. But you certainly felt robbed when you heard that the Joker had killed him. You seethed and you heavily considered marching toward Gotham to seek revenge. 
You knew that Dick was angry with Bruce for finally giving in to what the Joker wanted and killing him. For finally ending their sick, twisted game. But when you found out - you were glad that the clown was dead. You wrapped one of Jason’s stolen shirts around your pillow, and you slept a bit easier at night. 
Jason knew that he should have left town. 
Crane claimed that Red Hood was going to be the next Batman - that he was going to be something the Bat never could. That he was going to actually keep the streets safe. But so far, all Jason had done was steal, kill, terrorize, torture. Crane spoke of omelets and breaking eggs - pigs and bacon, and ‘marketing’ himself to the public. But truly, it never made any real sense to Jason. 
Jason knew that now, he was the type of man lurking in the night whose arm you would have broken if he was lingering too closely to the vulnerable. And you would have been right for doing so. 
Jason was tired. He felt lost - directionless. He was getting tired of Crane’s bullshit. He missed you. But he knew that he couldn’t just go running back to you. You likely wouldn’t have accepted him back into your life if he did. 
When Crane called him in that night, wanting to discuss ‘the game plan’ - Jason was worn. His patience for all of it was already wearing thin, and what happened next - it truly caused him to snap. 
Jason showed up in full gear, wearing the costume of an alias he no longer believed in; foolishly dressed up as someone he had truly begun to resent. He was holding his helmet in hand, his heavy boots clunking on the floor as he dodged around Crane’s egghead lackeys - a random group of people who were working to convert the anti-fear gas into a larger batch. He knew that they were aiming to get more and more people in the city hooked; if Jason hadn’t abandoned his morals in this new life, he might have cared more about the consequences. 
Instead, he made a B-line for Crane, who was typing away at something on the computer. 
“Jason, my boy!” Crane grinned at him, giving a false, performative grin over his shoulder. “Lovely evening, isn’t it?” 
“What do you want?” Jason asked, his tone flat. 
He was far too tired of Crane to engage in more word play or stupid riddles. 
“Never one for pleasantries, are you?” Crane chuckled. 
Jason didn’t offer him a reply - seemingly confirming his theory with this simple act. 
Truthfully, he wasn’t. He wasn’t feeling very pleasant today. He hadn’t felt very pleasant any day since he had been so rudely pulled from the morgue and zombified to do someone else’s bidding against his will. Being an undead puppet didn’t really make a person all that pleasant. 
Crane reached into the pocket of his oddly quaint grandpa sweater and pulled something out - a small glass vial, containing some clear liquid. It looked harmless - like water. But Jason knew Crane, and he knew that whatever it was must have been entirely dangerous if Crane was carrying around such a small dose of it. 
“Do you know what this is?” He asked, giving the vial a small shake, jostling the liquid inside to emphasize his point. 
Jason hesitated before he shook his head in the negative. He hated to appear clueless and stupid around such an intelligent man, but he didn’t want to guess and be wrong. He knew that being misinformed around Crane was dangerous. But being cocky and pretending to know more than Crane was even more dangerous. 
“This is a very highly concentrated form of liquid Methadone.” Crane explained. “It’s a highly addictive substance. And I think it’s going to give the mass market version of your formula that little extra kick that it needs, ya know? Keep the people coming back for more!” 
He let out a bright chuckle, as though he was talking about a cleaning product that was marketed on an infomercial or some kind of great recipe for soup. That was one of the things that scared Jason the most about Crane - his ability to talk about life changing, deadly things with such jarring enthusiasm. He truly thought of bringing people their worst nightmares and their most painful deaths as ‘beautiful work’. 
“What about it?” Jason prodded quietly. 
He knew that Crane hadn’t called him here just to brag about a new idea to add something to the formula. He needed Jason for something. 
Jason just hoped that he wasn’t looking to use him as a guinea pig again. He would likely rather die again than go down the path of heavy drugs. One thing he had vowed - he wouldn’t end up like his mother. 
“Well, you see, my boy, that’s where you come in.” Crane grinned at him. “Due to its highly addictive qualities, Methadone is also a highly regulated substance. But because I am the wonderfully well-connected man that I am, I happen to know that there is a very large stash of it just sitting there, ripe for the taking, in this quaint little building uptown.” 
Jason’s gut stirred with suspicion. 
“Where uptown?” He asked. 
“Well, it’s just-” Crane stuttered, and then sighed, deciding to get it out and over with. “The Wayne Memorial Cancer Research Facility.” 
Jason glared at him. 
“But see, it’s fine! Because I happen to know someone who knows their way around the Wayne Tech security systems very well. So Red Hood breaks in there, gets me my-” 
“No.” Jason said flatly, before he turned and started to walk away. “Find somebody else. We’re done.” 
Crane had threatened to replace him before. Crane had no-so-subtly threatened to kill him alongside being replaced. Maybe that was a good thing. Maybe Jason would be better off dead. Maybe Crane would find out that Jason was irreplaceable after all. Maybe Jason was a dirty, seedy criminal shaped by life for only one thing: ruining the lives of others. If Jason couldn’t do that, he wasn’t sure what he would do. 
But he wasn’t going to fucking do this. 
Killing was one thing. Stealing from drug dealers and mobsters was another. What he had done to Hank had crossed too many lines - but it didn’t even begin to approach the lines that this crossed. 
Stealing from a facility that Thomas and Martha had set up when Bruce was just a child, shitting all over their legacy, using skills that Bruce had taught him in order to do it? That was too far. Jason couldn’t say that he had morals anymore, but he still had that voice of common decency in the back of his head yelling at him to stop it. Maybe it was your voice, correcting him at every turn the way you used to. 
He should listen to that voice. 
He should leave town. 
“Hold on, hold on there, Jaybird!” Crane called after him. 
The pure annoyance that the nickname caused was the only thing that stopped Jason. He considered turning around and shooting Crane just to shut him up. 
“See, I think you forget how this works.” The man went off again - talking in that humming tone he always used that made Jason’s ears numb, made his brain switch off. “Every loyal dog gets a treat. A little motivation to get that Pavlovian mind barking in the right direction.” 
Jason turned back around then. 
“Nothing you say ever makes any fucking sense.” He barked out, ready to leave Crane with these as his last remarks before he left Gotham forever. 
But then Crane tapped at a few things on his keyboard and pulled something up on the monitor - a dark, grainy video feed that had Jason squinting his eyes and walking closer to get a better look. 
When Jason was able to truly take in the scene - his stomach dropped. 
It was you. 
You were sitting alone in some anonymous, concrete warehouse - probably in the industrial district of Gotham, if Jason had to guess. Crane didn’t like to keep his insurance policies too far away, he liked to play it close to the vest. You were tied to a chair, duct tape tight over your mouth, very much there against your will. You were looking straight ahead, with the camera angled down from the top corner of the room. Even through the grainy, black and white footage, Jason could see the wetness of tears streaking down your face. 
You were terrified. 
Jason’s helmet clattered to the floor, slipping from his grip as the shock overtook his system. 
For the first time in weeks, fighting through the numbness of the drugs and the hazy shock of his new half-life - he was terrified too. Then he was angry. Rage bubbled up inside of him like a sharp, acidic bile. 
“What the fuck have you done?” Jason growled out, the anger setting his jaw so tight that the words could barely escape between his teeth. 
“I told you - every loyal dog gets a treat.” Crane said, a barely contained glee filtering through his voice as he peered over Jason’s shoulder at your weeping face on the screen. 
He clapped a large hand on Jason’s shoulder, and Jason felt himself nearly choke on his own tongue - so swollen with anger that it barely fit in his mouth. 
“So, go fetch, doggie.” Crane continued. “Go get me what I need. Otherwise, that sweet little treat of yours is gonna play dead.” 
Crane leaned over and whispered those last words into Jason’s ear - and that was what truly caused him to snap. 
In a flash, Jason grabbed the hand that was on his shoulder, whipped Crane around - there was a loud crack as Jason broke Crane’s arm. The egghead types who were working on the formula all paused; some of them gasped or hid behind things, but none of them were brave enough to intervene. Jason shoved Crane’s face into the monitor, cracking it out like a spider’s web but never fully obscuring the image of that dark, cold warehouse - the place where you were alone and terrified. 
He twisted Crane’s broken arm, making a sound like glass grinding in on itself, and the man let out a howl. 
“I think you forget how this works.” Jason barked at him, his voice so dark with rage that it almost sounded like he was wearing Red Hood’s voice modulator even though his helmet was on the floor at Crane’s feet. “When dogs get pissed off - they bite.” 
He twisted the injury again, and Crane let out another bitter howl. 
Jason demanded to know where you were, and Crane squeaked out an address. It was in the industrial district, so it checked out in Jason’s mind. It didn’t seem like a trap or a false answer to waste his time. 
Jason shoved the pathetic, useless man to the ground, kicked him in the gut for good measure, and then leaned down to grab his helmet before shoving it on. He would need it in case Crane had anybody stationed there, guarding you. 
Crane shouted something at him as he walked away, but Jason was barely paying attention - now very singular minded on his mission toward you. 
“You have to learn to play by the rules, Red!” Crane choked out. “You won’t like how this ends! I made you! I fucking made you!” 
… 
Jason was surprised to find the building empty. No guards, seemingly no bombs, no gas canisters. At first, he thought it really was a trick, a misdirect to waste his time. But when he had just about given up hope of finding you, searching one of the back most rooms that used to serve as overflow storage for Ace Chemicals - he found you. Concrete and anonymous, some of the beams having eroded away in places from improper chemical storage. 
When you saw him stalking toward you - his gun drawn, heavy boots thudding against the floor, modulator puffing out heavy, mechanical breaths - you let out a terrified whimper past the duct tape and more tears flowed freely down your face. 
Jason felt a twinge of guilt. Of course. You had no clue it was him. 
Perhaps he could get away with the mercy of never revealing himself to you. He could keep his mask on, release you, drop you back off with the Titans and then leave town. But eventually, Dick would tell you who he was. 
At the very least, he could give you the comfort of seeing a familiar face after the hell you had been through. You were wearing a sweatshirt and simple cotton pants, and running shoes - it looked like you had been plucked off the street during a jogging session. He could only imagine how much Crane’s lackeys had scared you. 
Once he was confident that the area was secure, he holstered his gun and then reached up, removing the face mask from his helmet and tossing it aside. 
“Hey, hey, it’s me.” He told you - attempting to be gentle and soothing in his voice. 
He approached you slowly, not wanting you to be scared as he reached to his belt for a knife - only with the intention to cut the ropes around your torso, wrists, and ankles. 
He watched your expression as you flashed through a range of emotions - deep confusion, a bit of relief, sadness, and then strangely - burning anger. You glared at him with the most intense rage he had ever seen from you - more intense even than the day you had stormed into his room and called him stupid and suicidal for going after Doctor Light without backup. 
Jason was slightly afraid of the lecture that would come next, but nonetheless, he knelt beside you and began cutting you free. 
The minute that one of your hands was free, you reached up and ripped the duct tape off your mouth. You took only a fraction of a second to wince in pain from the tender skin of your lips being disturbed before you began verbally tearing into him. 
“Jason Todd!” You screamed at the top of your lungs, so loudly that Jason was sure some of the edges of the corroded concrete pebbled off and fell down just from this. “Jason fucking Todd! I should have known you had something to do with this!” 
“Wh-?” 
Before Jason could question your odd choice of words or even recognize it as an accusation, you raised your other freshly free hand and slapped him squarely across the cheek - it was a hard, skull-shaking clatter. It had Jason dizzy, falling back onto his ass and dropping the knife before he could finish cutting the ropes around your legs. 
“Fucking ow!” Jason griped, reaching up to grab his now very red cheek. 
“You are such an asshole! Of all the completely idiotic, stupid things you have ever done-” 
“I didn’t fucking kidnap you! Okay? I didn’t do shit!” Jason quickly argued back, finally now realizing that you thought he had put you here in the first place. “I’m here to rescue you!” He said each of these words slowly, looking you in the eyes, hoping that his point would get across more firmly this way. 
There was a tense moment as you stared back at him with your jaw locked. It was likely that if your feet hadn’t still been tied, you would have run away - or kicked him. Jason was thankful that you couldn’t do either at the moment.  
“Why?” You asked, finally breaking the tension. 
“What?” Jason gaped. 
This was the last thing he had been expecting. 
He was saving you - why were you questioning him? 
“Why are you ‘rescuing’ me?” You asked, taunting his phrasing of it with a mocking tone and large air quotes. He now regretted freeing your hands. “So you can bargain me off to Dick for ransom money? So you can put a bomb in my chest?” 
You said the last part with intense disdain, tears dancing in your eyes.
So you did know what a monster he was.  
He was surprised that you hadn’t hit him harder. 
Jason heaved a sigh. He reached over and picked up the knife, very slowly, very tentatively resuming cutting the ropes on your legs to free you. 
“I’m just freeing you so that you can be free. That’s it.” He said quietly, defeat lacing through every inch of his voice. “You don’t deserve this.” 
He cut the last rope and folded the knife, sticking it back in his belt. He stood up then and caught a glimpse of your face - you were wearing the most complex expression he had ever seen. Perhaps confusion, perhaps anger. Maybe somewhere deep in your eyes - hurt. 
He turned and moved to leave, hoping you would simply follow him out of the confusing maze of the building and he wouldn’t have to drag you out kicking and screaming. 
“That’s not an answer.” You told him, your tone sharp and certain - the same tone you always used to correct him. 
Jason whipped back around then, heaving a sigh as he looked at you - standing in the middle of the room now, arms folded over your chest, glaring at him on the spot. Cocky and so sure about yourself. Too damn certain and immobile in your points. Infuriating. 
“Why the fuck do you have to make everything so damn complicated?” Jason shot back, annoyance and dread tight in every inch of him. “Why do you have to interrogate me about every damn thing that I do?” 
“Because you make stupid ass decisions when I don’t.” You easily fired back. “Now tell me: why are you doing this?” 
“Because I wanted to.” Jason huffed. 
“Why?” You prodded again. 
He let out another hot huff, and you didn’t let it go. 
“Come on Jason!” You shouted, increasing in volume as you became more frustrated with his lack of an answer. “You didn’t just develop a conscience all of a sudden! Why did you feel the need to suddenly drop everything and come to my rescue? What makes me different than Hank? What makes me different than-?” 
It was the annoyance grinding on him. It was a combination of your nagging voice, the lack of drugs in his system for the first time in weeks. The rawness of the world ragging on his last good nerve. The sound of your voice putting him in line - exactly where he was supposed to be. The way you reminded him of the truth now more than ever. 
“Because I’m in love with you!” Jason shouted. 
It was almost… angry. It was a declaration that hit you like a whip - more like an insult than something warm and kind. It wasn’t made of sweetness, like some moment from a film with a gentle piano riff wrapped around it. It was real - made of the haunting kind of passion that kept Jason awake at night. 
Your eyes widened. Jason’s breathing stilled as he waited for you to react - to say something. 
“Oh.” Your voice cracked around this syllable, and your eyes danced with more tears. 
Jason felt his own heart crack apart inside of his chest, more terror flooding him. 
He had died with the secret because he had never wanted to live up to the embarrassing vulnerability of confessing it. In the deepest part of his mind, he had lived this horror a thousand times. Him finally creeping out onto the edge of oblivion - speaking those words. Confessing. And then you stabbing him in the heart, rejecting him. 
The reality of it ripped through him so much harder than it ever had in his nightmares. 
Any last tiny piece of his soul that had survived being murdered by the Joker had just been shattered by you. 
“Yeah. Fucking oh.” Jason echoed back, his own tears clutching at his throat. 
Seeing him with that naked vulnerability dancing behind his eyes - it reminded you of the same person who came back from being kidnapped by Doctor Light. It reminded you of the real Jason you had gotten to know. 
In that moment, it all came crashing toward you. You gasped harshly as you could barely breathe around it. 
That hole in your chest had been shaped like a lover - it had been shaped like him. Filled with the pain of letting him get hurt, leaving him alone in Gotham to be murdered by the Joker. Filled with the doubt and confusion of never knowing what could have been between the two of you if you had chased those flirtations a little bit farther. 
And now, he was standing right here in front of you, somehow perfectly alive and well - and there was only one possible thing you could do. 
“Jason.” You gasped out his name, unable to fathom more words. 
Before he could move, you reached out and grabbed both sides of his face, one of them still singed with a burning ache where you had slapped him so hard - and you pulled him into a kiss, hard. 
It wasn’t pretty. It wasn’t dainty or smooth like some Hollywood love confession - it was hungry. Bordering on feral as you both fought to consume more of the other person, bleeding out little moans and fighting for breath past each other’s lips. Jason’s hands rushed to embrace you, wrapping around your back and grabbing a needy, possessive handful of your ass while you kept your grip tight on his face, keeping his face forcefully close to your own as you devoured his mouth. 
You felt some of his tears escape - such a rush of emotions making him raw and unable to hold them back, and you moaned pitifully into his mouth as he wetness slipped underneath your palms. Whatever it was - his pain, his pleasure; you would take it. He was all yours now. 
… 
Far off, on the other side of Gotham, Crane chuckled quietly to himself as he watched the scene unfold. He had pulled up the camera feed on a separate tablet, seeing as Jason had used his head to crack the monitor. With his broken arm bound in a temporary sling, he used his one good hand to pull something out of a drawer - a remote with a single button. 
“For these violent delights have violent ends,” He recited to himself, still grinning widely as he looked at the two lovers in the grainy, black and white footage. “And in their triumph, die like fire and powder. Which as they kiss, consume. Even the sweetest honey is loathsome in his own deliciousness, if the taste confounds the appetite.” Crane poised his finger on the button. “Therefore, love moderately.” 
He pressed down, and dissolved into more epic laughter as he watched what came next. 
… 
You were only human, and you could only kiss Jason for a few minutes before your brain demanded oxygen. As much as you hated to pull away from the sweet, bruising sting of his lips, you forced yourself back and immediately took in a sharp breath that turned into a rolling pant - Jason let out a needy whine in protest. 
With his arms holding you so securely and the dizzying heat now flowing through you - you almost didn’t catch it. But it was there, in the background, something steadily present that wasn’t there before. 
Beeping. A small, electronic beeping. 
“Do you hear that?” You asked Jason, squinting your eyes with confusion and looking around, trying to find the source of the noise. 
He did hear it. 
“Fuck.” Jason mumbled. 
Panic flooded him. The whole thing had been a trap. 
He pulled away from you hesitantly and grabbed his mask up off the ground, snapping it back on. 
“We have to go. Now.” He told you, his voice now sharp and robotic through the voice filter as he grabbed your wrist and began dragging you away - you became limp to his direction for once and simply followed, fear tight in your gut once again. 
Jason didn’t want to consider the possibilities, but he knew it could be anything from a large bomb, meant to tear you to shreds, to a large dose of fear gas waiting to be deployed. And he didn’t have an antidote at the moment. He needed to get you out of the building and transport you to safety. 
When the two of you came to a door - one of the many that Jason had passed through on his way in - it snapped shut in Jason’s face. It was on some kind of mechanical locking system, that much was apparent. Jason rushed forward, trying to pry it open - but it was welded steel, and it wouldn’t budge. 
Jason heard more slamming - more metal forcing itself shut on the same locking system. 
“Jason?” You croaked, that unsure terror back in your voice again. Something so rare for you. You were looking to him for answers. You were looking to him to rescue you. 
Overhead, the last bits of light were shut out - glimpses of the street lights outside - as thick metal shudders collapsed down over the windows. The room was sealing itself shut, becoming air tight. 
“Stand back.” Jason told you, not waiting to see if you followed the instruction before he pulled out one of his guns and began shooting at the door’s heavy metal hinges. He knew it was futile and he feared that one of the bullets might ricochet off and hit you, but he didn’t have many options left. 
Then he heard it. The gentle hissing of gas being released into the air. 
Jason was naive to have hoped that it was Crane’s classic Fear Gas - that would have been a merciful walk in the park compared to what he had planned for you. Betraying Jonathan Crane meant that Jason had to be truly punished. 
Jason turned to you, wrapping his arms around you, as if trying to shield you from the air itself - but it was too late. You began coughing and struggling to breathe, and Jason looked on with confusion as his chest twisted with guilt. 
With his helmet on, he felt nothing. For the first few moments, he didn’t even understand what was going on as you gasped for air, struggling to form a word as you choked on each breath. Jason had no clue what the substance was or how he could fix it, looking on in horror as thick fog clouded around your ankles - your eyes bulging out of your head as you struggled for oxygen. 
“Y/N?” Jason gasped, holding you by both shoulders as you became weaker and leaned on him. “Y/N?” 
You couldn’t answer him. 
You continued to wheeze, your breath hitching against your throat harshly. As the fog reached up to touch your face, it left angry, blistering marks in your skin. Unlike Jason, you had no armor to protect yourself - and somehow, Crane had turned the air itself acidic. Your eyes became wrecked with bloody red streaks and your face swelled as you continued to choke. 
Jason’s insides screamed, but he felt too still. 
As more of the fog touched you, some of the marks on your neck and your cheek blistered more and opened up, bleeding out pinkish bubbling puss as Jason continued to hold you - he didn’t know what else to do. 
All he could do was hold you. 
A harsh foam seeped out of your mouth as you choked on your last half-breath, and Jason felt a stinging pain consuming him - he wasn’t sure if it was the acidic fog finally breaching through his clothing, or the biting pain of having you limp in his arms - dead, as he huddled there on the floor. 
“Come on.” Jason wept, steaming up the inside of his helmet as he recycled back his own breath now. He reached up to your cheek, accidentally skimming off a layer of your marred skin with his gloved thumb as he tried to wipe away some of the teary blood that had leaked from your eyes. “Come on, Y/N. Wake up.” 
Jason simply wept. And he held you. 
As he looked at the camera feed, Crane smiled. 
“This is what happens when you don’t play by the rules, Red.”
...
A/N: SOOOO obviously this ending leaves us with a lot of questions - did Jason survive? I think this can be interpreted one of two ways: one, Jason did live. He managed to escape somehow, and he had scars all over his body from the acidic fog, and he enacted a very vicious, bloody, torturous revenge on Crane before going into hiding forever (or before using Red Hood to give actual justice to innocent people who needed it, his scars always a reminder of who he lost). Or - he sat there in shock and eventually choked to death as well. Or he pulled the whole 'my life is not worth living anymore' thing and just took off his helmet on purpose. So you can imagine that either of those things happened next.
Also, if you didn't catch it (or, if you're not a Saw person) - this situation was heavily inspired by the final plot twist trap in Saw X. I love the acidic fog, and I feel like Crane could be a trap guy. The Titans version of Crane could be good friends with John, imo.
Also, if you enjoyed this fic, check out my DC Titans Masterlist for more of my other fics!! And please consider reblogging and commenting on this fic to tell me what you liked about it.
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tenpintsofsundrop · 9 months
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What would Jason Todd be like in bed? (Titans Kink Headcanons)
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A/N: These headcanons are based off the Titans version of Jason, and while in the show they didn't mention the Pit giving him any supernatural abilities, it's my headcanon that it did give him some heightened strength and some enhanced healing abilities like it did in other versions - or you could just imagine a different version of Jason while reading this if you want. Also, in this, the reader is intended to be completely gender neutral - I do mention Mommy kink (as in, Jason calling the reader Mommy) but it is my belief that those terms aren't gendered in kink situations, and a woman could be called Daddy and a man or amab person could be called Mommy (obviously, only if you want to be called that - but imo, it's not restricted to gender, and the two terms have very different vibes and uses). Other than that, the main warnings are: mentions of sub/dom dynamics, mentions of faux lactation kink/breast feeding kink (Jason sucking on your tits - again gender neutral imo), strength kink (Jason pinning you down), and pain play/pain kink (mostly toward Jason, but some mentions of it toward the reader).
DC Titans Masterlist
...
Okay - Jason Todd is a fuckboy. That is something that is obvious about his character from the jump. He is the type of guy to use cheesy pick-up lines unironically, he is shameless about dirty talk. He is the type of person to carry condoms absolutely everywhere 'just in case'.
But - I genuinely believe that situationship or friends with benefits Jason would be way, way different than boyfriend Jason. When Jason gets into a serious relationship, he is a whole different guy. (And yeah, it has to do with the foster care thing, commitment issues, he thinks that you are going to pick up and disappear from his life at any time so he doesn't want to get attached. It's a whole thing.)
Fuck Buddy Jason - he is the true definition of a fuckboy.
He flirts with you nonstop, he's constantly making sexual innuendos around you (but he does turn it off around others if you want to keep your relationship discreet/a secret). He's the kind of guy who thinks that it's funny to fake hump you every time you bend over in front of him.
He will take every opportunity to make sleazy comments (you deny that this turns you on because it sounds like his dirty talk). He will mock your moans, be annoyingly cocky (and oh so slightly degrading) and when you get annoyed with him, he will remind you that he is the one fucking you on a regular basis. He tells you that if you hate him being annoying, do something about it. Otherwise, you let him get away with being an annoying asshole and you still 'let him hit it'.
(The 'something' he wants you to do about it is putting him in a submissive role - tying him up, spanking him, generally putting him under your complete control. But we'll get to that in detail later.)
Fuck Buddy Jason is the most infuriating man on earth.
The minute he's done fucking you (giving you the most mind blowing experience of your life) - he will brag right to your face about how hard he made you cum and instantly make you want to strangle him as he is still tying up the condom.
But he's like this because he is trying to emotionally distance himself. He's trying to keep himself from being too vulnerable and catching feelings for the person that he is fucking on a regular basis.
On the other hand: Boyfriend Jason - he is a total puppy.
When Jason officially gets into a relationship with you, there is a very distinct set of changes in him. When he is finally promoted from 'friends with benefits' or 'it's complicated' to officially being your 'you have a drawer in my bedroom' 'you have a key to my place' boyfriend, he turns into a completely different person around you.
He's no longer afraid to be vulnerable around you, and he becomes the 'your bullshit is my bullshit' type of person. He wants everything life has to offer with you. And it changes his attitude in the bedroom as well (but it doesn't really affect his kinks or his skills, just how he plays around with them - but we'll get to that).
Jason becomes a whipped puppy.
He is on your heels all the time, he is completely loving and affectionate. Before, where he used perverted humour and snarky sarcasm to try and deflect his feelings for you or ignore the way he was feeling, now - he just leans into it. He wants to cuddle you 24/7. Any time the two of you are in the same room, he is glued to you like a koala.
And whether he is more submissive or more dominant, ultimately, you rule the relationship, because whatever you say - goes. Jason is wrapped around your little finger. He would move the sun and sky in order to make you happy.
So how does this affect his sex life?
Jason is a switch.
I can't see him being a hard dom or completely submissive to anyone. He likes to play around in both roles, and ultimately, it would depend on where you are in the relationship and what kind of role you want to take on.
When he first gets into a sexual relationship with you, he is naturally more dominant, because he feels that he has to be controlling. He thinks that he has to live up to all of his fuckboy talk in order to impress you. And surprisingly, he would actually impress you. But, if the two of you were involved for a while, he would let you take over the interactions, but only if you were intensely strong willed.
Fuck Buddy Jason in a submissive role is a god damned brat. He will fight you for control every inch of the way, he will be mouthy as hell and talk back to you, challenge your authority, and make you 'punish' him in order to put him in his place. He is fierce and frustrating, and you have to forcefully shut him up - with multiple spankings, a gag, or intense overstimulation (or you could break him with orgasm denial, which Jason doesn't even realize he likes until he has experienced it).
Jason in a relationship? In a more dominant role, he is incredibly soft and caring. He's much more prone to love making - he will automatically fall into a routine of worshipping your body, performing deep, sweet sex, especially with a lot of verbal praise and sweet talk towards you. He loves you and he wants you to know it, and it lights up all of his mental pleasure centers to be able to dedicate his bodily pleasure to you and make you feel good in the process.
If you want him to go harder, it definitely needs to be prompted.
A very easy way to get rough sex out of Dom Boyfriend Jason is to make him jealous.
He is possessive as hell, and seeing you flirt with another guy, especially if it's someone dangerous (a known criminal) - it will make him blow his lid.
But then, in a jealous streak, Jason will fuck you like he hates you and mark you up in an effort to show you just how much he loves you and show you how badly he needs to have you all to himself. Does it partially come from a place of insecurity, worried you might actually leave him someday? Yes. Will he ever admit that aloud? Only during the most tender, quiet pillow talk.
Boyfriend Jason as a sub? Again, he is the most soft puppy ever.
If you're in a long term relationship with him and you're the more dominant type, you will quickly discover that Jason is a needy, cuddly baby. He wants your attention on him all the time, and it only gets worse when you're in the bedroom. He wants complete skin to skin contact, he wants to touch you all the time (even without permission) and whines when he can't, he lives for being called a good boy, he fucking loves cockwarming, and though it's something he would never admit under even the harshest physical torture - he has a Mommy kink.
It's something that slipped out once while he was buried deep inside of you, and you didn't let him live it down. At first, he was intensely embarrassed to call you that. Now he calls you that on a regular basis, and it is something that has become warm and comforting for the both of you.
Now, let's talk more of his general kinks.
He is someone who lives for praise. Whether he is in a dom role or a sub role, he wants to be told that he is doing well. He is fuelled by specific, detailed verbal praise. Despite his cocky demeanor, he's not always the most confident, so he loves the assurance that he is doing well. (Or even just ego boosting compliments about his looks, or being called a good boy does a lot for him.)
And if you tell him that you like something specific and why you like it, then he will do that thing over and over again without prompt every time you have sex just so that he can be praised for it.
He also loves praising you. Jason loves every single thing about you, and he definitely wants you to know it. He could compliment you a thousand times a day (and he will). He will never run out of sweet things to say about your beautiful body, your good looks, your talents, the way you make him feel - so he just keeps the praise coming for you, in and out of the bedroom.
He is not too fussy about oral sex. Despite the fuckboy stereotype, he would rather skip right to penetrative sex than to have his cock sucked. And he does love performing oral sex on you, but not because it's an act he particularly enjoys the feeling of - because he loves being praised for it. He loves the euphoric feeling of your sounds filling up his ears as you cum on his tongue. But again, if he can, he will just skip it and go straight for penetrative sex.
Jason loves deep, slow sex. He loves looking into your eyes while he fucks you hard and deep. He loves full body skin to skin contact while he fucks you. He loves feeling every inch of you while he's deep inside of you, being able to hold you with his arms wrapped around you. He loves the kind of sex that consumes his entire soul (though, before you're in an official relationship, he will absolutely never admit that).
He especially loves cockwarming for this reason - he loves laying on top of you with his cock deep inside of you, surrounded by the warmth of your body and cuddling while he can feel safe and vulnerable with you. (Again, he wouldn't admit this until you're actually dating, and he probably wouldn't actually cockwarm you until you're officially dating for this reason.)
He has an oral fixation - so why wouldn't he love oral sex?
Jason is more into having his mouth full, he loves the fuzzy headed feeling he gets when there is something heavy on his tongue (and for a long time, he wouldn't know to describe this as subspace). It's something that he is only into as a sub. So he loves having his mouth filled with a cock or toys, and it makes him feel fuzzy and subby. It's not the ideal mindset to be performing oral sex. But he does love to suck on fingers or breasts for hours for this same reason.
(And this is where his Mommy kink comes into play again, and he may discover down the road that he has a simulated/faux lacation kink - but idk if I have time to get into that here lmao.) (He just likes sucking on tits, can you blame him. Girltits or boytits, he's not picky.)
Jason is a total painslut. This is one of his kinks that becomes clear very soon into your sexual relationship. Because he spends so much time training and roughing up his body for exercise, he loves the dopamine hit that pain brings in that sense, and it easily translates when it comes to sex.
He loves having his hair pulled, he loves the feeling of sharp nails scratching down his back, he loves having his lips bitten, he loves being slapped (if you were having an argument and slapped him, it would immediately make him rock hard). And as a sub, he loves being spanked, shoved around, and roughed up in all possible ways. He loves the combination of pain and pleasure.
He is more hesitant when it comes to giving pain to a partner, because he is muscular (and especially after the Pit, when his strength is more compact than he's used to). He is afraid of potentially hurting you past your boundaries by mistake. If he ever did that, he would never forgive himself.
But as long as there is a safeword in place and you assure him that you are enjoying yourself (and he has some good aftercare in place) he will spank you, bite you, scratch you - but he likely wouldn't use tools or implements (like a paddle) because he wouldn't want to go to hard and actually damage you. Using his bare hands to spank you gives him better control, and in his opinion, hitting someone with an object is saved for the criminals.
Jason wouldn't be very into bondage as a dom (like, tying you up when you are submissive to him). He much prefers pinning you down and feeling you struggle against him. Even if you train just as hard as him and you're just as strong as him, he prefers to feel the struggle, especially when he makes you cum and you're pleasure-numb and it's a lot harder for you to fight back against his strength. He loves feeling the fight leave your body as you become overstimulated and your muscles become loose.
Post-Pit, with his magically enhanced strength, it's pretty much no competition and he especially doesn't see the need for rope or other bondage equipment then - he will just pin you down to any surface and take you as he pleases.
Jason as a sub - fucking loves bondage. He loves being tied up and restricted, especially when it means handing over total control to you. Control is not something he gives up easily in life. So when he's with you, someone he feels completely safe with, and he is forced to give up control by giving up the movement of his body, it is thrilling for him. When he's forced to just lay there and feel whatever pleasure you give him (or don't give him) - then it puts him in a really relaxed mindset that he barely knew he was capable of.
Jason loves dirty talk. It comes with the fuckboy status. He was dirty talking to you before he even really knew your name, and though you wanted to hate it (because it was kind of out of line?) you loved it because he was cute and somehow got away with it.
As he got to know you better, and got to know your likes and dislikes, his dirty talk got more outlandish and more on point, and now he knows how to turn you on and make electricity shoot through your core with just a single well thought out sentence. (This is what he uses his brilliant vigilante mind for.) He also doesn't reserve dirty talk for the bedroom. He will randomly sneak up behind you in the kitchen and whisper outlandish things in your ear while you're cooking (and cause you to spill things) - he will connect you to a private comms on a mission and tell you all the details of how he plans to fuck you later. He lives to see the reaction he gets out of you with his clever, filthy tongue.
You have learned how to get him back, though - and you know that a well placed pet name or a promise for later can buckle his knees too.
Jason also loves sexting. He loves seeing pictures of you in cute, sexy little outfits, and he is very, very proud of a good dick pic (and of course, keeps a folder of the ones he loves the most of his own) and loves tempting you into sending sexy pictures of yourself that he can save for later - with your permission, of course.
As I said before, he is very into orgasm denial - but only as a sub. He would fold very quickly to begging if you denied him an orgasm. It makes him very narrow minded and focused on 'the goal' and it's very good at shutting out any of the anxiety or noise in his brain, which he loves. Orgasm denial makes him a very obedient sub, very quickly. It is the most effective punishment for him.
However, as a dom, he is very bad at denying you anything - if you pout or give him puppy eyes, he gives in too quickly. He only spanks you because he knows that you technically enjoy it. It's not really that much of a punishment in his mind. He's very bad at 'punishing' you. You do just get whatever you want. The only thing he doesn't really tolerate as a dom is mouthing off/attitude, but that is just a way for you to get what you want - rough sex.
This last one might be weird, but I gotta get it in here somewhere - Jason is very prevalent about condoms. He doesn't have a breeding kink, he doesn't have a creampie kink, he is very adamant about protected sex. He thinks condoms are sexy. Unless you are able to get pregnant and actively trying for a baby (which, for him, would take a lot of convincing past his issues and some therapy) - then he is all condoms, all the time. If you can't biologically get pregnant or if you wanna ditch condoms and use some other form of birth control in a long term relationship with him, he might still wanna use them out of habit or just because it's not as messy. He is a condom guy.
(A/N: Also I just have to say - if Jason doesn't have a kid, he will bring home stray cats like they are Halloween candy. You will randomly have a stray cat in your house every other week and it becomes a problem. (Also if you want me to do general relationship headcanons about these characters, please let me know omg.))
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sunny-day-dream · 2 years
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Trying to do anything sneaky in the Pizzaplex?
Think again
Sun's costume is covered in bells.
Sun would pull you into an old section of the building because he just can't wait anymore pleasepleasepleaseee can he touch you yet????--and security is left wondering who the hell is messing with a tambourine in one of the maintenance tunnels??? Because it's echoing everywhere and they can't find the fucking thing???!
(Sun hasn't clued on to how much noise their outfit makes while they fuck you yet, but Moon has, so he makes sure to leave you wearing at least one of their bell covered ribbons on purpose... because he finds it hilarious to watch each new security guard come to the same horrified look of realization when they see you next.)
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