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mitch-the-silly · 2 months

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Could you write a nsfw Vox x fem!reader where Vox comes home from work, feeling really stressed and asks for the reader’s consent if he could relive that stress on her? Like he’s being really rough on her and maybe praising her too? 👉👈 Nothing too extreme though, and I find consent sexy.

HELL YEAHHH I CAN!! This is exactly what I was waiting for!!! A reason to write Vox smut. What can I say? I'm but a simple creature.

Vox would for sure do that relieving stress via sex thing. Especially since he's always pressed about something and because I like to think he's at least a bit of a manchild.

Anyway, thanks for the request!!

"Take a Breather or Two...?"

Vox x fem!Reader NSFW

MINORS DNI!!!

Warnings: NSFW, Stress relief sex, praise kink, rough sex

You sat silently on the bed that you and Vox shared. With your headphones on, listen to whatever it was that the shuffle button deemed fit for that moment. The feeling of the silky, dark grey sheets against your skin felt heavenly. Vox was going to be home any moment now, and you’d be there to greet him as always. It was simply the way things had been for a while now. He’d work, and you’d spend some much-deserved time with him at home.

You heard the door open and immediately sat up on the bed. However, the slamming of the front door was what made you raise a brow.

“I can’t fucking believe it!” Vox yelled from the living room. He finally entered your shared bedroom, untying his bowtie and sitting at the edge of the bed. He stared at the wall for a second then, covering his eyes with his hands, he kicked the air in frustration. “Ugh, you have no idea what a day I’ve had…” He sighed.

“What happened? Tell me…” You spoke, placing your hands on his shoulders, gently massaging them. He let out a small relieved breath as you did this. After that, he continued.

“First of all, Alastor fucking tried me again today! Not to mention that I had to cancel three of the ten shows that generated the most revenue because the lead actress was taken out in the last extermination and we didn’t know because she went on vacation and said she’d be back in a month. And on top of that Valentino has been throwing the most stupid tantrums. Ughhh!” He vented, “I need to take out some steam.” He gave you a bit of an unrecognizable look. He seemed to be generating an idea. However, there was no way for you to know without asking.

“That sounds like a good solution, Voxxie. You got something in mind? I can see the gears turning in your head~” You teased.

After pondering his idea for a brief moment, Vox continued proceeding to speak his mind. “I want you.” He spoke bluntly. “Yes, fucking your brains out would make me feel so much better.” He added, his breath shuddering slightly. He scooted closer toward you and caressed your face gently. “Can I do that baby~? I’ll only do it if you let me…” he pouted. Almost begging, but based on his tone, it was apparent he was willing to drop the subject if you did not want to do it.

You nodded softly. But that wasn’t enough confirmation for him. “No no, use your words.” He replied in a commanding tone.

“Yes, I’d like that. It sounds like fun.~” You spoke, this time telling him outright that you wanted this.

Vox nodded, “Ok, I’ll try not to be too rough. Just… fuck you’re so fucking sexy…~” He sighed, letting out a desperate little exhale.

Vox reached for your hips, instantly pulling off your pants along with your panties. He wasn’t one for teasing when he needed it. Without wasting a second, he split your legs open, gently tracing the inside of your upper thighs. He licked his lips desperately, determined to make you feel good before he fucked his anger out on you. He leaned his head towards your private area, giving your clit a gentle lick.

You shuddered in pleasure, letting out a small whimper. This drove him absolutely mad. So much so, that he could feel the need to continue this coming from within his core. So he licked along your labia, circling your clit hungrily until you were just as wet as he wanted you. The sounds of your juices gushing as he licked you up, oh it was making him want to do all sorts of things to you. And thus, after hearing how wet you were now, he stopped.

He sat up, looking at you with a certain hunger in his eyes. There was a primal need for more taking over him, not quite clouding his mind but filling him with a haze. “You’re being such a good girl for me.~” Vox cooed, unbuttoning his pants, and pulling them down to his knees. He scrambled to his waist area and took his cock in his hand. Needily aligning himself to your entrance. The sight of his cock on your labia made him shiver impatiently. He rubbed his tip on your clit, gasping out a small shudder

After getting a gasp out of you, he smirked, inserting himself into your entrance. “So tight for me~” He chuckled, very slowly moving in and out of you. You moaned relentlessly, wrapping your legs around him as he mercilessly bucked his hips into you. The sensation made you moan out his name. Reaching out to hold him, you wrapped your arms around his neck. He leaned down to kiss you, pushing his tongue into your mouth. He indulged in its taste, savoring your mouth with absolute ecstasy. The second he parted the kiss, he bucked his hips faster.

Vox’s screen began to lag, the image of his eyes freezing up as he looked directly at you. “Fuck~ You’re so fucking pretty like this~ So good for me~” Vox groaned, his voice distorted and sort of glitched out. It was way too obvious he was enjoying himself.

“Ahh~! V-vox, I’m… I’m close…~” You whined, bouncing back as he pumped himself into you.

“You wanna cum baby~? You want me to make you cum~?” Vox cooed, groaning, desperately chasing his own orgasm. You nodded desperately, whining, feeling a warmth pool up in your insides. He was making you feel so good that you couldn’t turn thoughts into words anymore.

Vox let out a laugh, an amalgamation of amusement and absolute arousal. The flat-screen television he had as a head began sparking as his strokes became more uneven and deep. “Fuck, you’re doing so good for me~ So fucking good…~ You’re gonna make me cum so deep inside you…~” He slurred, seemingly so high on the pleasure that he didn’t seem to give a shit about the malfunctioning lights in the room. He took in the sound of your moans and pants, letting the vibrations course through his being. He had to feel you cum around his cock. He needed to feel it. So he reached his hand down towards your clit, rubbing it with his thumb. You squirmed under his touch, an orgasm approaching faster than before, and you bucked your hips into him. And as you began to get tighter and tighter, the lights began to flash faster. “Yes~… Yes…~ So fucking pretty all stuffed up with my cock…~ Look at that beautiful fucking face…~” he groaned in absolute adoration.

And suddenly, with a hard thrust and a loud grunt, Vox found the climax he so sought, darkness engulfing the once-lit room, his monitor showing the “ERROR” screen. Yet, he didn’t dare stop the way he was touching you. Oh no, he needed to feel you reach your climax as well. He rubbed faster and faster, enduring the overstimulation of keeping you around him, your walls pulsating. He began to whine a bit himself, in all honesty. Until, finally, you arched your back in, your hips spasming as you eventually reached that orgasm he just needed you to have. The sensation of your walls around him, driving him absolutely mad. So much so, that the room’s power returned, but only for the split second in which your walls squeezed him in the midst of your climax. He’d never felt this good before and he swore he wanted more of this.

He pulled out of you, wincing at the sensation and then collapsing next to you. He tried to catch his breath, looking at you doing the exact same thing. Once he felt his breathing was stable, he got up and looked around for a towel. Once he found one, he returned to your side and cleaned you up. “There you go…” He chuckled, “You know, I don’t think that in all the time I’ve been in hell or in the years I was alive I've had sex this good.~” He smirked, pulling you closer, holding you by the hips. Looking at you with that same look of adoration he gave you before.

“You’re not stressed anymore, huh?” You chuckled, gliding your index finger under the bottom part of his monitor; returning his playful little smirk.

“They can go fuck themselves. My steam’s been blown.” He responded, kissing your lips one more time. Needless to say, this might be his go-to when he gets this badly pissed off.

#hazbin vox #hazbin hotel #vox x reader smut #vox x reader #vox hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel smut #hazbin hotel oneshots #vox hazbin

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sowheresmyroom · 3 months

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Vox's propensity to laugh when he's nervous

The poster in Val's room of himself that says "to my biggest fan. Me." (In which he's posing with both of the "sexy" guns)

Velvette and Vox both using 'fossil' as an insult.

Velvette keeping Vox and Val's messages on hand for her song to reference

Vox and Val pinching each other's cheeks condescendingly

And the baby talk voice Vox makes when doing so

Velvette giving Vox kissies through the phone

Val making moth squeaking sounds

Vox preventing Val from going and causing a scene, only to go and cause a scene (and broadcast it)

The stupid popsicles shaped like their faces

#the vees #rotating them in my mind #hazbin hotel #vox #Velvette #Valentino

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celestiaras · 5 months

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‧₊˚✧ ❛[ he makes for a great dog ]❜

ft. vox akuma x gn! reader — luxiem, nijisanji en

╰₊✧ vox “i ain’t a bottom” akuma actually makes for a great dog if you put a muzzle on him┊0.8k words

contains: smut!! dom(ish) reader & sub(ish) vox┊established relationship with a side of hate sex if you squint, fighting for dom, pet play (leashes, muzzles, pet names), bratting/brat-taming (?), riding to mating press, unprotected sex, slight edging/teasing, mild pain play, biting & bleeding, breeding, hair-pulling

➤ author's note: would it be too out of character to make him whimper? i started his and completely fell off, who let me write smut┊inspired by (clip) & (clip)

“fucking bitch,” he snarled, his sharp teeth bared behind the muzzle you wrestled onto him with his heavy breathing dampening the metal wires.

“aww, that’s not a nice thing to say to the one who has you on a leash, now is it?” your voice remained surprisingly steady when vox was rutting into you like the feral dog in heat you were treating him as.

“do you think that you can boss me around just because you thought it would be cute to cage my mouth up? you have another thing coming for you.”

you giggled when he choked on his words with a simple roll of your hips, tugging on the leather strip to force him to make eye contact with you, “be a good mutt for your master, okay? i’ll give you a treat if you obey me~”

“shut the hell up,” his tone dripped with venom even though he felt like he was going to lose his mind— trying to nuzzle his face into the crook of your shoulder but unable to kiss you, to taste you, to run his tongue over every inch of exposed skin, but he couldn’t because of this stupid muzzle.

his inability to use his mouth led to him being rougher with his hands, pressing into your skin harshly enough to leave bruises with small crescent indents being made from his black-painted nails. he was too tempted to just remove the silver cage since his hands were free, but that would be losing this stupid bet he made with you and he was far too proud to admit defeat.

all he had to do was keep it on before he could come, but it was proving to be much more difficult than he thought— especially with how good you felt like his cock was made to fill you up and how sexy you looked with the domineering bedroom eyes, there was rarely anything more fun in the bedroom than having to grapple you in order to protect his reputation of being a top. is being driven to the point of madness from lust really worth making a point out of pride? he so badly needed more stimulation that you just weren’t providing him with the sole purpose of teasing him and you were damn good at it, softly kissing him and being all innocent like you weren’t testing the limits of his patience by keeping that cage on him for as long as you possibly could.

the cold metal pressing into your skin was admittedly uncomfortable, but it was worth it to see the big bad demon reduced to such a needy mess. he was so sure that it would be a simple task that he could handle with ease, saying that he would be your pet and submit to you if he failed this bet. who would have known that he would have overestimated his own abilities against you so wildly?

“how about… how about we take this stupid thing off? it isn’t as fun when you restrain me, right?” he was getting desperate enough to try and compromise with you, trying to convince you that this silly little game wasn’t worth withholding pleasure from the both of you.

“hmm?” you tilted your head at him in mock confusion. “you aren’t having fun? i’m having the time of my life right now, seeing how cute you are as a bottom. who would have thought that all it takes for the great vox akuma to submit was a muzzle?”

something in him snapped when you said that and that was his breaking point, using his demon strength to break off the muzzle with one hand with small bits of metal flying off to the side while he flipped you on your back like you were lighter than air. his action caught you off guard when you suddenly found your legs hanging uselessly over his shoulder while he animalistically rammed into your hole like you were the last souls on earth.

you hissed in pain when you felt him sink his fangs into the flesh of your shoulder then soothing the pain by licking at the fresh wound he inflicted, the metallic taste being sweet on his tongue. you didn’t even feel the knot in your abdomen unravel until it actually happened, leaving you to see white as your lover chased his own long-awaited high while riding out yours until he painted your insides white leaving you feeling sticky and full.

vox finally stilled and panted from loss of breath at the abrupt exertion of energy, but he’d never felt so much relief from so much pent-up frustration. however, his victory was short-lived when he felt your hand snake into his raven locks and pull him off of you, making him groan in response as his eyes rolled back.

you clicked your tongue at him in disappointment even though you knew that this would happen from the very beginning, “what a bad dog you’ve been, i wonder what punishment you should get for disobeying me?”

#📜. her works #nijisanji x reader #nijisanji smut #nijisanji #vox akuma x reader #vox akuma smut #vox akuma #luxiem x reader #luxiem smut #luxiem

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multi-fandom-imagine · 2 months

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So, but of an elaborate request, but-

Reader that works for Vox as an actress or any other type of TV celebrity being comforted by either Alastor, Husk or Angel because Vox yelled at her, practically cussed her out and made her cry.

(Love your fics btw!!)

A/n: You're so sweet 😩, also why not all three 👏.

•Alastor•

Alastor knew it was you the moment you stepped into the Radio broadcast room. He could see tears running down your cheeks and he already knew what fucker was to blame.

Stepping close to you, the demon did his best to push away his anger. He knew Vox was taking his anger out on you because of him. What he wouldn't do to ring his scrawny little neck.

Brushing away a tear, Alastor clicked his tongue then pulled you into his body. He had to bend down to hold you but he did his best to comfort you.

"Now now dear, do not fret nor worry about what that clout chasing mediocre podcast says about you."

Letting out a few more sniffles you looked up at him smiling weakly. "Really?"

"Oh course dear, now let me deal with Vox. He will never make you shed anymore tears."

•Husk•

You were quiet when you sat down on the bar stool, your head resting on the table. He could see you held tears in your eyes, that you were doing your best to not sob. He hated seeing you cry, hated it because it meant that he couldn't do a thing about it.

He felt useless, he felt like a loser.

Wings twitching he made his way over to you, you looked so pretty in that dress. You had so much talent, to much talent for that jackass. Shaking his head he let out a grunt pulling you into his chest not caring about your tears soaking.

"He yelled at me again, the things he said....I'm so fucking stupid. Why do I keep doing this Husk? I just want to sing, I like what I do but I dont know how much longer of this I can take."

Frowning, Husk let his head rest onto of your head as he let his claw run down your back gently. "Forget what that freak says to you. You have more talent than that hack darling." Maybe he go do something to fuck Vox up, ya that's what he'll do.

He'a not gonna let that bastard get away with making you cry.

"Now can you give me a smile? Don't let that prick ruin the fun we might have."

Letting out a weak laugh you looked up at him with a weak smile. "Fun? What kind of fun."

"Whatever you like love."

•Angle Dust•

If there was one thing Anthony understood was the shared pain he felt with you. He did his best to hide the abuse he received from Valentine, just like you did the same with Vox. But he hated it, he hated that someone with your talent was being wasted on that bastard.

Peaking at your crying face, he knew you were trying to stay strong and he hated it. He hated it because you helped him through everything and you were doing this for him so he wouldn't worry.

"Why ya cryin over a freak like that!" Anthony did his best to cheer you up but it seemed to make you even more miserable. "Come on hot stuff."

Taking a step towards you, Angel dust gave you a grin pulling you close. "I got a sexy little number for ya to make a certain bar tender to stumble over his words. You guy's will be makin babies soon enough.."

A light laugh escaped your lips, Vox'a treatment of you completely vanishing through your mind. "You really think me wearing this would make Husk lose his mind?"

"Sugar, if it doesn't then you always have Lucifer." Anthony gave you a wink as he shoved the skimpy number in your arms. "Now hurry up and change...I gotta see his reaction."

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bigfatbimbo · 2 days

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vees' collective dom but the one who just wants to live a peaceful life or something else that leads them to bonk (sometimes physically) vees off doing their villainous things. no, vox, you're NOT dealing with that deer tonight, we've agreed to watch a movie. no, val, you don't overwork your staff, it's fucking noisy. vel, don't you dare ever talk to other overlords like that again, it's risky

tbh, I had an image in my head about such reader complaining about vees' manipulations while some (another) punishment. like that vox could not use his hypnosis to make people buy his new product if he just made it actually useful, so why not he put that stupid head of his to better use on your chest and nothing more. vel should've thinked better on how love potion could be used, so overstimulation to show her it is. and val? wouldn't need that manipulative nice persona if he'd make actually good films and not some animalistic boring shit, so why he won't keep all of his hands to himself and try to be more romantic, sitting behind you, tied so well so he's only able to talk and he better do that

- 🦊

Basically a reader almost (definitely) manipulating the Vees into being less evil. ALSO NOT PROOFREAD!!!

So i’ve had very similar thoughts to this for a while and i’m going to tell you exactly why this would work. Quick lore drop about me but I used to be such a lowkey shady businessman (not explaining anymore than this, i’m healed) and let me just say, people like them are actually very easy to manipulate.

AKA greedy, power hungry, egotistical maniacs. What they do is terrible, thats no denying that, but they think very highly of themselves and their skills. So ‘stop abusing your employees’ not from a moral standpoint, but from a competence standpoint. That sells.

Like the whole “vox could not use his hypnosis to make people buy his new product if he just made it actually useful” thing would absolutely work. It’s a hit against his ego and self competence, and because of the fragility in his facade, it would absolutely cause insecurity.

And reinforcing it with very rough, degrading, dumbifaction style sex would absolutely still have him thinking the next day. He’s sucking your tits or dick or something and you’re making comments like “Aw, look. A job you’re almost good at. Too bad that little head of yours can’t even think of anything useful to society.” Make him cry, you definitely can when it’s a knock at his intelligence and power.

“vel should've thinked better on how love potion could be used, so overstimulation to show her it is.” Oh boy, I know this would get to her. Velvette thinks she’s hot shit, no, she knows she is. So now you’re overstimulating her and making fun of her because really? You had to use, even better, actually put time in to create a whole ass love potion, because not enough people wanted to fuck you?

She’d whine and tell you that’s not why, but come on. I mean, why be that hell bent on something so futile, we both know she’s not selfless enough to just give that away to virgin creeps all over pride. Oh Velvette, who’s came countless times and who’s pussy aches and has makeup running down her face, now has to her your call out on her confidence, and how it’s only boosted by her useless, forceful grab for others attention.

And Val, there’s so much ground to cover. “wouldn't need that manipulative nice persona if he'd make actually good films and not some animalistic boring shit.” Personal callout to his craft, which is clearly just as self indulgent as it is tiring. Your actors look so battered, Val. That’s not a good look, and isn’t that the point? Sex won’t sell if the people aren’t sexy, and that stars cracked lip is positively hideous.

There’s no intimacy, and you doubt someone as talentless as him can even achieve romance. So now he’s tied up on the bed, barely able to move as you sit across from him, not just bored, but reading a book or scrolling on your phone. He’s practically crying out cliche, used lines to romance you, and failing miserably when the whine creeps in.

So basically, the angle with Vox is his fragile power, Velvettes her unimpressive beauty, and Valentino is the implication of him not having a grasp on sex. Oh also fucking them to drill it in their head. Because what, people? Something that impacts the control over their work-life and sex-life will stick. Sex and power go hand and hand when the greedy are lustful.

Now are the results?

Well, Vox would make a show of making more useful products, and still use hypnosis, obviously he’s a shitbag, but there’d be a new level of self-hatred that comes with it, meaning it’d happen less.

Well, Velvettes is a little harder to just… take back as the product is already out there. However, the product promotion goes down ever so slightly because yes, money and power is great, but you’ve done something no one can do. Embarrassed our confident queen.

Valentino actually thinks before hitting an employee to hard, and actually lets actors have conversations because apparently people should have… chemistry? He doesn’t know, he just doesn’t want his porn to be boring or not sexy. His other issue (assault, i’m talking about assault) is not resolved he just leaves less marks.

You’ve successfully watered down a problem for a long-term (but not permanent) period of time. This could be even longer if also plant the idea of falling from power in their head.

Simply “What were you before an overlord? A sinner. What are your employees? Sinners. If you treat these employees to harshly, what will they do? Rebel. To successfully keep and manipulate your power you need your workers to feel more than obligation, but loyalty to you. Not your company or their job. You. Otherwise, keep in mind how other overlords have fallen.”

If you ever try this from a morality standpoint, it won’t work. The angle is power, people, because they will never stop being abusive for the right reasons. However, your domineering behavior in bed has earned you an amount of respect.

I fear I sounded evil in this um… never have this mindset for people who aren’t corrupt evil rapists. Also, I don’t think I talked about the smut aspect enough sorry, I just love character analysis. OH ALSO I haven’t been a sinister salesman since I was 16, everybody, calm down. Everyone has an angle though!

#hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel x you #dom reader #hazbin hotel smut #vox x reader #velvette x reader #valentino x reader #the vees x reader #sub vox #sub velvette #sub valentino #sub vees

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zensations35 · 25 days

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Where Do We Stand? (Radio/static)

Yeah, I went whole ass horny with this one. One-sided fet!Vox pining after a drunk Alastor shows up hurt and sick at his doorstep. Lots of angsty shitass banter and a sprinkle of sexiness. cw for a Val cameo and whump with blood mentions. Enjoy!

Vox’s security monitor keeps fucking glitching. His own screen flickers and Vox’s left eye squints, mouth forming a tilted line of annoyance. He lifts a teal claw to tap the screen but it fuzzes anew and in tune with a squalling sound.

What the fuck? This screen is brand fucking new!

He fills his lungs to call out for a fledgeling demon when another sound stops him. From the front of the building.

What the electric fuck?? It’s 2AM. Who the--

ــــ٨ــ

The sounds twin with the glitching on the screens he was in the middle of editing with.

Rgh. I’m being stupid. Glitching electronics happen.

Still…

He rises from his personal study and follows the sound, finger scraping along the base of his screen like he used to do to his living chin before a big meeting.

The halls, unlike those in Vox’s security room, were dim, low light. The glow of his screen is enough to guide the way toward the double doors leading him in the direction the strange static leads him. Each speaker he passes grows louder, less crisp.

٨ــılııl٨ــ

It can’t be that. I saw him get fucked up. He wouldn’t come here. Why the f--

He wrenches the front door open to a pathetic, bloody, giggling--

“Alastor??”

“Why hellooo Vox~ Kfh-HK٨ــEHaha!!”

His smirk is cradled in flushed cheeks and beaded by dots of thick ichor. Holy shit. The fucking Radio Demon is crumpled on Vox’s front porch, folded into a disheveled pretzel, ears asymmetrical, eyes half black and glossy.

“Jesus fuck,” Vox reactively kneels, hands jutting toward his injured rival, but stopping just short, wrenching back as if Alastor’s body were laced with fire. His screen dims, brows knitting. “What the fuck are you doing?”

“Visiting, obviously,” Alastor’s head lolls to the side, his wrist lazily rotating as if they were conversing over dinner, “was it not on your bucket list to see me at my worst, old pal?” His palm hovers over his face and his head cocks back, “EifSZk٨ــK!”

“God fucking dammit!” Vox laces his arms under Alastor’s, heaving him to wobbly legs with a slew of curses. “You came to me? Not your--ngh!” he drags him through the doorway, Alastor stumbling drunkenly, “Not your new friends?”

A keening laugh breaks through Al’s static, “Oh~ new friends. HaĦȺ. Well. They don’t trust me--”

“I don’t trust you,” Vox growls as he uses the toe of his shoe to wipe a smear of blood from the shiny tile. He shifts the Radio Demon so he can use his back to carry him the rest of the way to his room.

Well, this floor was clean. Vox will have to get someone to scrub the fuck out of the hall and immediately wipe their memory. That’ll be another all-nighter. Fuck.

Alastor props his pointed chin on Vox’s shoulder and flicks the antennae on his hat playfully. “Ahhh, but I know where you stand. I know what to expect from…hhh-ik!” he smushes his nose into Vox’s neck and shudders. “Nnnhـ٨ــhh…we were friends once…and I know you wouldn't let me die, not until you got me under the sheets.”

“Fucking hell--are you drunk?!”

Another cackle, “But of course! ��μɑ! How else was I to have the utter lunacy to come to your doorstep?”’

“Ugh…”

Finally in his bedroom, Vox uses his foot to slam the door shut, thanking Tesla he wasn’t sharing it with anyone tonight. He heaves Alastor onto the brand fucking new couch and groans, massaging his lower back with a few spicy curses.

Alastor slumps full out, dizzy and whirring, resting his cheek against the cool leather as he allows his eyes to flutter shut for a few seconds.

When they pop open, the ink of his power fades and the crescent of his smile thickens as he dances his gaze around the room.

“You’ve redecorated.” His throat rasps. “I don’t like it.”

“You never do.” Vox grumbles. His eyes roam over Al’s ravaged body, charred and seamed, coat in unholy tatters.

The Radio Demon wiggles a finger and even that small action looks like it exhausts him.

“Enjoying the view?”

Vox folds his arms, cocking his screen, “Just admiring Adam’s work.” He dips his teal finger under Al’s ripped vest and Alastor hisses. Vox pauses, throat tightening.

“Go on,” Al waves, “ignore my…noises.”

Vox mutters but continues peeling away some of the sticky fabric. “Al, Jesus this…this looks,” his eyes surge, “What the hell did you do?”

“Hfـ٨ـZX!”

Vox pauses, his system blipping. He sweeps a thumb across the base of the wound, making Alastor twitch in pain.

“It hurts that bad?”

“Not at all.”

“Fucking liar.”

“As ever.”

“I’m going to have to undo your vest.”

“Are you asking to undress me?”

Vox presses fingers to his screen, pixels beading in a prism where the pressure hits. “Al, Jesus, you know I wouldn’t--”

“I knew. Seven years ago. Things have changed.”

“Not that. Never that.”

Alastor scoffs. “Well, the company you keep.”

“You have no room to judge me or them, you fucking--”

“You’re right.”

Vox pauses, mid-breath. He flicks his gaze back up to Alastor, suddenly severe.

“I don’t.” Alastor says coolly.

Vox grinds his teeth assertively, “Those two helped me when I had no one. When I was at my fucking lowest. When I…”

“Mmm…I see.”

“Do you? Mr. I need no one?”

Al scoffs, a derisive snort. “What the hell do you think is happening right at this very moment?” he gestures down the length of his beaten corpse.

Vox’s vibrant eyes roam down the mangled form, his mouth shrinking into a tight crescent frown.

The glower slips from Alastor’s face as his lips contort into a twist, his fist winging up to catch a half-stifled, “GSZ’TF-Vـ٨ـvV!”

With his hands still on Alastor’s body, the jerking motion sets off a buzz of Vox's sensors, flushing his screen with a purple and pink glow.

Alastor wipes the side of his mouth and chuckles. “Ah~ Some things don’t change.”

“Fuck off.”

Al slips the top portion of his vest off and snorts at the look on his rival's face. “It’s embarrassing how badly you want to fuck me, Vox.”

“Will you stop analyzing me long enough for me to actually help you? Because I’m losing my patience here.”

“Fine.”

Vox grinds his mouth a severed frown at the corner of his screen as he dips closer to inspect Al’s chest. “What the hell did you do to it?!” The split skin is sewn together with some sort of green string--sloppily so, as if Al had done it half asleep and shivering. Which… actually tracks.

Alastor slaps his hand away with a grunt. “I’m no pharmacist, Vox. What do you expect from me? My expertise is pulling bodies apart, not piecing them together.”

“And you think I can do a better job?”

“Can you? Or are you more jealous you didn’t get to do it yourself?”

Vox mutters something and turns to rummage in a medicine cabinet.

A clattering knock has both men jutting ramrod stiff, Alastor wincing and scrunching his claw over his tattered wound.

“Vox~?” Valentino’s amorous voice floats through the closed door.

“Shit!” Vox glances at Alastor and his screen freezes, a line of pixels popping out in a shock of contrast.

Alastor’s smile stretches, his bleak eyes set in a wan but capricious leer. “Oh dear~”

“Shut-up!” Vox pings to Alastor’s side, his hand splaying over his mouth as Val’s voice floats through the door.

“Vox, darling? What’s the commotion in there?”

“Nothing!” Vox struggles to keep his voice neutral, even as Alastor’s lips move under his fingers, hot and damp. The breeze of his breaths flutter through his parted claws as he begins to pant, his grip on the wound growing firmer with a small shiver.

“Ff٨ــvv”

Oh Tesla, fuck no--

“Vox, can I come in, amorcito? I have…”

Vox misses Val’s next words, his screen blipping as Al’s face crinkles inward from the center, nose scrunching with a staccato of hitching breaths under the pressure of Vox’s palm.

“Hz͎̰͒c̩̍͋͐̚͠h̃́F!”

Godfuckingdamnshitb̷̧̝́į̵̇t̷̤͑͛c̴̻͊̂ḫ̷̨͘ç̵̉ơ̵̡̥c̶̰͒k̶͉̿̆ ̸̟̓

Another force presses against Al’s thigh, Vox’s erection growing reluctantly and brimming with flux. Alastor’s brows form a twisted V, a knowing look passing between them.

Vox feels his screen fuzz, as if he were experiencing a small surge. Then, a ping mildly akin to connecting to bluetooth.

((What--??))

((get--hh٨ــget rid of him)) Alastor’s thick staticky tone coat’s Vox’s inner speakers.

((You invaded my wifi??))

((Don’t be stu٨ــvphhii-)) the warm breath sweeps across Vox’s fingers and his screen crackles with energy, pixels oscillating with errors. But the voice isn't coming from Alastor's mouth. Only itchy breath.

((Control yourself, prick!)) Vox seethes through the wireless connection. He feels his rival’s breaths pulsing under his palm. Vox’s heartbeat speeds, matching the rhythm of threadbare hitches.

Alastor’s body wracks with a shudder. ((“Hvvv٨ــvXSH٨ــ!!”))

Vox feels the sneeze both vibrating his hand and within the walls of his mind. His own shiver is not one of fever but lust.

((Jesus fuck, Al.))

Alastor's smug grin stretches as he wraps his hand around Vox’s wrist and pries his teal claws from his face. ((You’d have a firmer chance of fucking him than me.))

RGH! Alastor’s head cracks to the side as Vox’s palm strikes his cheek, leaving a bold imprint on the side of his face. Dark blood paints a tiny ribbon on his lip as it curls into a soft smirk.

((Oh, I bet that felt good, enjoy it while you can get your filthy hands on me, you virtual fuck.))

Vox’s fangs vanish in an angry glitch for a brief nanosecond. ((I’m going to enjoy disinfecting your goddamn wounds and watching you writhe in antibacterial soap, shitass))

((Oddly, you’re not the first person to call me th--))

“Vox! Are you ignoring me??” Val’s voice swings from sugar to salt as it takes on a whiny tone.

With a pained grunt, Alastor shoves Vox away and snarls. ((You’d better go. Now))

((But you--))

((I’ll ħⱥꞥđłē it. Go))

Vox grunts pissily, but he knows Val is on the knife’s edge of impatiently storming in. The TV demon electrically ports to the door, his hand on the knob in seconds.

Before the moth can slip inside, Vox squeezes out of the room and clips it shut. Val glowers, cigarette holder snaked between the fingers of his upper hand.

“What the fuuuuck babe?” he whines. “What are you doing in there?” his lower arm trills toward Vox’s tighter than normal pants. “Your boner is bigger than the building, Luminosa.” His crooked grin ticks, pink essence beading at the corner, “Am I interrupting~ something?”

Vox’s fans sigh with a buzz. “Val, I’m just wor̴̗͠٨̵̠̔̓ “

A power surge overtakes him, making him groan, dropping his glitching screen into his palms. “H-k! Fv̵̨͛٨̴͈̀v̷͒͜٨̷̺̈!”

Valentino’s lower arms wind around Vox’s shoulders, his eyes drifting into concern. “What? What’s wrong?” His slim body bends at the waist to meet Vox’s, alarm spreading his wings to half mast.

“N-gh-nuh,” Vox hears Alastor’s voice mirrored in his internal speakers like an upload.

That fucker…

“Hih٨ــ! Their hitches twin across the connection, Vox’s body reacting to Alastor’s. “Heh-’̸̱͘SchË̴͇W̴̯̒H̸͓̕!̶̰͒!̷̮̐”̴̖͗ ̷͕̚ His screen flares brilliant blue, the jumbled onomatopoeia scrolling across the screen. “Gehh…snf!”

Val’s hands grip him tight, rooting him in reality. “Darling!” his tone peaks with coyness, “Are you unwell? Or are you playing~?” Pink venom inches down his fangs as his smile caresses his cheeks, his fingers gliding toward Vox’s groin salaciously.

Vox grunts, his palm smushed against the core of his screen as he attempts to sever the connection between himself and Alastor. “I’m٨ــhgk! I--”

Val’s hand grips his cock and he’s so hard and hot it could be the powerhouse to heat the flames of Hell itself.

“F-ffuuuhh--” he feels an encore of hitches from within his sensors. As Val fondles him, Al’s static strokes his modules. Vox’s claw crimps the fur on Valentino’s robe. His legs feel like gel and his free hand massaging the plasma of his screen is doing nothing to stave off the encroaching--

“IYZ’ETD̷̢͝C̶̗͕̙͇̟͒͌͠Ḩ̶͇̱͉͍͆Ž̷̬͋!̸̬̹̽͑!̶͇̥̜̜̆̋̄̋͘”

“Baby~” Val’s voice slinks along his skin, making him tingle with need. “Come to bed. I’ll take care of you...”

Suddenly, like the snap of a frayed cord, the connection to Alastor severs. Vox’s eye flares red and his heart stills for a full beat. Two.

What happened? He reaches out, opening pairing mode. Nothing.

He swallows and drops his hand, abandoning his lover’s touch.

“I--I’m fine, Val, I…I have to get this work done, I--” he backpedals, trying to swallow his heart back into his chest. “I just need a reboot and--”

Valentino visibly wilts, confusion washing his face as his antennae droop, “You…what??” his lips curl bitterly.

“I’ll see you in the morning,” Vox is already threading through the doorway, “Night.” He slams it knowing he’ll pay for snubbing Val tomorrow. Physically and mentally. He spins to see Alastor flagging over the side of the couch, his wounds freshly split and gushing.

“Fuck!” Vox races to his side, snagging a towel and bracing it against his chest. “Why the fuck did you do that?? You had me going fucking crazy out there!”

Alastor grunts, face painted with cold agony, pushing himself up against Vox. “Nfg,” You’re wـﮩ٨ــwelcome,” he spits, ears flattening as he glares at Vox, “Would you rather he hear me?”

“Maybe!” Vox snarls, pressing the towel harder onto the wound to watch the Radio Demon wince, “Maybe I should have let him find you just to throw you to the curb. Then I wouldn’t have to deal with you--”

“Hـﮩ٨ـSZV!” The burst of noise makes Vox startle, his hands bunching in the fabric of Alastor’s suit as he pins himself to the sputtering Radio Demon.

Alastor gasps, his chest inflating against Vox’s. His fingers climb against his face, clamoring to cover his nose and mouth even as his shoulders shake with the effort of restraining himself just long enough to get them there.

Small grains of lightning leap around the edges of Vox’s screen. Each of Alastor’s panting inhales make his breaths buffer and lag. He dares not risk looking at the Radio Demon--one more bracing inhale would suck the air straight from his lungs. “HFZḨ̶͇̱͉͍͆٨ــŽ̷̬͋!̸̬̹̽͑!̶͇̥̜̜̆̋̄̋͘𝚇༽༼Ɀ!!”

Alastor jerks forward into Vox’s arms, painting the TV demon’s hands dark and wet. Vox does his best to tamp down a fresh burst of desire and rage as he leans Alastor back against the couch.

Alastor sucks in fresh beats of air before peering up at him, a smug curl of his lips, “That was grossly and pathetically inappropriate.” He rasps a small hacking laugh, lifting a finger to graze the thin edge of Vox’s screen, leaving behind a garden of friction. “I hope you enjoyed it while you can.”

Vox shunts his gaze, neck twisting to hide the flush of his glow. “Goddamn you.”

“Already happened.”

Vox stands and grabs the previously deserted box of bleedstop.

Alastor’s brow lifts as he scrubs his nose. “Are you still consuming the poison?”

Vox scoffs, dumping out two packs of the supply.

Interesting they have such a large stock…

“I do what I do for my own reasons.”

“M~ and do those ‘reasons’ have anything in relation to myself?”

“Tch,” he sprinkles the crystals into his palm, “not just you.”

“Good. I almost felt bad for a moment there. Hgk-!”

Vox slams the palm of powder onto Alastor’s chest, causing the Radio Demon to wince and wither, noise blaring from his core. “Hff-Fuck! Couldn’t have done that any--eighhh!”

Vox grinds the heel of his palm into the wound, crushing the powder into a paste and buttering it over the gash.

“Ffــ٨ــuck! Vox, is this really necessary?!”

“Oh, so very necessary,” Vox snarls.

Alastor mirrors it but his lips are peeled in a grimace. He did invite this with his baiting remarks after all. Deserved. As always.

Once the salve is administered, Vox leans back and rips open a large roll of gauze.

“Lean up so I can get the back.”

Al does, but the movement makes him shiver. When Vox reaches for him, Alastor recoils, sealing his eyes shut with a moan.

“Don't be a fucking baby, Al. This won’t take long.”

But Al is shuddering so hard his teeth are clicking.

“Al?”

“Hfvv…Cــ٨ــcold-d…”

Vox touches his skin and it feels hot--feverish. “Fuck.”

Al wobbles and sags against the couch, still shaking, his arms now wrapped around his bare shoulders. His knees wind up and his ears disappear behind his head. “V-Vox̵̡̰̾̍͘x̴̢̫̜̊̎͛͌…”

“Al, stay awake.” Vox exhales, fans spinning anxiously. “Stay awake!”

Goddammitgodd̶̻̫̪͛ǎ̷͚̬͌̍͝m̵̫̮͝i̷̼͔̤̻͕͐͒͐͝t̶̰̙̲̜̦͊̑͗̒͘G̶̹͚̽́͐Ő̸̖̀D̸̢̙̩̍̆̍̒͊F̵̼̝̣̦̪̈́̾̈́U̶̹͚͕̒͑̂̍͝Ċ̸̙͖K̶̺̎͂̒̚̕I̵͇͝N̷͕͈̐̇̕G̶͕̀͜D̷̡͓̻̘̼̑̿A̵̠̠̋͝Ḿ̸̯̭̝̥M̶̟̅̀̊̒̓Į̵͝T̶̼̮̮͂́̄!̴̺̤̫̺̓!̵͉̘̽̋͂̕

Alastor slips, descending further into the seams of the couch, his left eye fully black now.

“Al, fuck,” Vox grabs a blanket from his bed (brand new fucking blanket too goddam--) and wraps Alastor with it. It seems to warm him a bit, the Radio Demon letting out a chittering sigh. He looks up at Vox, deliriously muttering with a newly wedged smirk.

“It seems you are b-better at this.”

“Fuck you.” Vox grumbles as he tucks another blanket around him. “Some of us have to be around here…” He waits for another snipe about Valentino, but it doesn’t come. “I still need to wrap your wound.”

“Of course,” Al says, but he makes no move to allow this. Vox rolls his eyes and props his screen on his fist, watching the asshole drift lazily.

Hours later, after finally having gotten the stupid ass gauze wrapped around his stupid ass not sexy body, Alastor seems asleep, but you never know with that guy. And Vox does not plan to sleep, even if he didn’t have to clean floors and mesmerize assistants.

When he returns from cleanup, Alastor is awake--or at least rested enough to stand on his own. His ears are alert and his eyes have cleared back to their normal magenta.

He’s doing his best to button up the three remaining buttons on his mangled vest. He seems sober now and perfectly posh and asinine as ever.

Normal. Except for.

“Where’s your cane--”

“Microphone.”

Vox rolls his head to the side, “Fine, call it whatever in this afterlife. Where is it?”

“Gone. Disposed of.”

“Why?”

“It matters not. I don’t need it. I’m not--”

“I know, Al.” Vox dribbles a sigh. "Are you going to be--"

"Thanks for having me over, chum," Alastor interrupts him, strolling to the door and flicking a coin to Vox. “For the service.”

“Tch. Whatever.”

Al shrugs. “Keep it. I do not wish to owe you.” He tugs his coat straight and adjusts his bowtie.

“Oh, and Vox,” Alastor pauses, claws ticking along the grooves of the bedroom wall. “Never say never.”

Vox lifts a neon brow. “You mean…”

“Once you find the exception, it becomes easier and easier to justify each consecutive time. And then you become that which you abhor.”

Mist curls around the Radio Demon’s body, and he vanishes as if he’d never been present.

God damn him. Vox slams the door, even though he didn’t actually leave through it.

That’s why he hates Alastor so much. Because he’s right. He’s so often goddamn right.

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costulata · 2 months

Text

I can't take it anymore. I HATE VAL STANS. I HATE THAT THEY USE "HE'S FICTIONAL" EXCUSE. I HATE THAT THEY MAKE SEXY FANART OF HIM. I HATE FANART SHIPPING HIM WITH VOX/ANGEL. I HATE V*V COMPARES HIM TO MEAN GIRLS KAREN SMITH... A TEENAGE GIRL

I HATE HIM I HATE HIM I HATE HIM I HATE HIM I WANT THAT STUPID UGLY BUG BITCH DEAD

#anti hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel critique #hazbin hotel criticism #hazbin hotel critical #i hate hazbin hotel #edit forgot to put the Lucille clip when first posted

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nunalastor · 1 month

Note

Valentino: Aw, c'mon babe. It wasn't that bad. I thought it looked - snrk - sexy.

Vox: (sulking) Yeah? Try saying that with a straight face.

Valentino: [Face screwing up from physically trying to hold back a laugh, only to bark one out anyway.]

Valentino: I CAN'T! It looked so fucking stupid, Voxxy, I still can't believe you ever thought you could pull it off!

Vox: OH YEAH!? IF THE AFRO LOOKED THAT BAD WHY DID YOU STILL FUCK ME!?

Valentino: WHY THE FUCK DO YOU THINK I INSISTED ON DOGGY STYLE? SO I WOULDN'T HAVE TO LOOK AT YOU DURING!

Velvette: Ew! TMI.

😭

#vox fro #hazbin hotel #nunalastor asks

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onesidedradiostatic · 1 month

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Intro Post + FAQ!?!?!?

STRIPES TRUTHERS DNI!!!!!!!! (this is a joke)

I'm not replacing my pinned post because I like my pinned post. it's special to me. it describes my blog in a single gif. but I'll link this in my bio.

hi! I think this was long overdue. first of all, introduction!

I'm pink! she/her, 19, filipino-chinese, 🇸🇬

I am an asexual sapphic on the aro spectrum! I'm not repulsed in either department though, I consider myself mostly sex-neutral and romance... idk, ambivalent irl, favourable in fiction.

keep in mind that hazbin hotel itself has a lot of explicit humour, so canon-typical level of that kind of humour should be expected here. however, outside of text-only nsfw jokes, I typically don't post or reblog nsfw art (and IF I did, I would use community labels/appropriate tags). I may also tag certain text-only nsfw joke posts as #suggestive, just as a precaution.

and now the FAQ...

FAQ

Other than one-sided RadioStatic, what do you ship?

I've actually done this before, but decided I'd update it a bit.

cherrivel is only there because of the need for velvette to have someone at the hotel to be obsessed with, refer to this post. it is currently unserious and could easily never come up in my posts I just thought to include it because of that one time I brought it up. other crackships may come up if I find it funny (ie adam x mammon).

this shouldn't come as a surprise to anyone, I do not like any reciprocated romantic alastor ships, I'm not here to police anyone for what they do in fanon, but all I ask is no one send me anything of the sort. I interpret alastor as a repulsed aroace, and the dialogue in which his asexuality is implied in canon implies to me he would never pursue dating (rosie knows alastor wouldn't be dating charlie because he is aroace, which implies she knows he is an aroace that doesn't date**). so that is how I choose to portray alastor in my posts.

**TO BE CLEAR, there IS nuance to this. because action =/= attraction. funny situations such as a fake date with vox as a distraction that he doesn't like at ALL entertain me. but I do not believe he is the type to pursue it under normal circumstances.

regarding qprs... well, as you can see, I really only care for qpr radiorose, but this is the part where it comes down to personal preference. qpr radiostatic largely depends for me, maybe if it's like an au where they never had a falling out or something but otherwise, I don't personally really see it, but that isn't to judge anyone who does. HOWEVER, I do like thinking about their past friendship, here's a post I made before regarding alastor's side on it.

Who's your favourite character?

unfortunately, it is the stupid tv man in my pfp. alastor is my second favourite though if that's not immediately obvious (wow tumblr user @onesidedradiostatic's faves are vox and alastor who could've guessed?)

Do you know [insert pre-series information here]?

I need to clarify, I am NOT a pre-series hazbin fan. I only got into hazbin properly at episode 5-6's release, prior to that I had only watched episode 4 out of curiosity due to twitter discourse. any information I have regarding pre-series stuff comes from the wiki, tumblr posts or anons who have informed me of stuff. my main source of information is the main series, that is how I first consumed hazbin after all.

What the fuck is the "Lucifer's Commissions Saga"?

it all started with an anon talking about the most unrealistic thing about vox owning an alastor body pillow being that alastor was able to be printed on it without glitches. I then dropped a stupid idea I had in my head for a bit about lucifer being offered 50k to make a sexy alastor painting for vox. one reblog later. well. it turned into vox commissioning lucifer for the body pillow. and then a bunch of asks came in related to it and it turned into a saga which is now my legacy. feel free to scroll through this entire thing. also a fanfic of it by ChaoticAce2005 now exists. go check it out. AN ANIMATIC BASED ON ONE OF THE POSTS BY NATAKARANIA ALSO NOW EXISTS. CHECK THAT OUT TOO.

The original post mentions Val commissioning Lucifer for the art for Vox, Val is canonically a talented artist, why would he do that?

in my defence, I kinda forgot about that when I posted the original joke. later asks, I've mended that val HAS drawn for vox before but vox nitpicked too much and val's not always willing to do a fully rendered sexy alastor... so vox has to outsource. and he just happens to do so to the king of hell.

Hey, hey, listen! What if Vox doesn't have a crush on Alastor but wants XXX instead!?

hey, I respect you! I respect your opinion and hc. but this blog is built around that concept specifically, I like vox wanting something he can never have, wanting romance from a guy who literally cannot feel the same way about him. so I'm probably not gonna be as passionate about other takes. but your opinion is valid! I'm just not really sure what you want me to say other than respectfully disagreeing.

Why don't you use RadioSilence for one-sided RadioStatic?

radio silence is the name of another book made by the author of heartstopper, alice oseman (which I heard also has a canon aspec character!). even though it is already a used tag for this ship, I refuse to contribute to flooding the book tag with hazbin hotel. it's already an issue I see even when searching #radio silence with the space, I think those in that fandom should be allowed to search for content without being flooded by content from another fandom. please understand.

I instead use #onewaybroadcast in accordance with this poll. I still use the regular #radiostatic and #staticradio tags in addition to it for more reach and because vox's side still technically counts under it, if anyone doesn't like specifically one-sided radiostatic for whatever reason, they may filter out the specific tag or block me.

Tags

#osrs.txt - all text posts, including asks #osrs.art - self-explanatory, art done by me #osrs.mp4 - videos which can range from compilations, shitpost edits to high effort edits #osrs.helluva - my helluva boss reactions/liveblogging and related stuff

#radiostatic parent trap subplot - the short series of asks joking about the torn picture vox has reminding them of the parent trap, turning into a crack subplot #projecting irl experiences onto radiostatic squad - where a bunch of anons came together to recount irl experiences with incels and say "yeah this is vox" #the ays - angel dust realising he and alastor are the reason for the vees' focus on the hotel and decides to brand both of them as the ays #lucifer's commissions saga - everyone's favourite as explained above, and also the biggest arc on this blog (my legacy) #alastor's modern sexuality label crisis - started with alastor misinterpreting "asexual" as asexual reproduction, continued on to him misinterpreting more modern sexuality labels #vox's stupid fucking turtleneck - it started with me trying to start up a debate on the colour of vox's turtleneck in the vox and val photo and escalated into people in my notes and askbox trying to gaslight me into thinking the turtleneck has stripes instead of it being a KNITTING PATTERN. this is what the STRIPES TRUTHERS DNI is referring to btw #cursed yellow val - tag name taken from andy-solo1, started as a response to the turtleneck discourse, I believe the turtleneck is a similar colour to val's wings therefore yellow turtleneck truthers are implying val's wings are also yellow #respectless anons - started with an anon trying to correct colour names and saying "not to be velvette..." and ended up with other anons being kin assigned characters #all the fucking parodies - there's been 2 parodies for you didn't know and 2 for respectless by others based on shit from this blog now, this tag is needed #the fanon val killjoy beef - tag made for the made up concept of valentino and katie killjoy beefing, started from this post

#osrs.intro

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ittovera · 10 months

Text

… loading 「 internet romance 」

「 lucifer 」 -> vox akuma

偉いね偉いねご苦労様 ( well done, thank you for your hard work ) -> lucifer。¿? shimon

characters: vox akuma

summary: falling in love with vox akuma over discord.

word count: 1.0k words

content: fluff

a/n: part of my 「 internet romance 」 collection (*´∇｀*) sorry it took so long for release !!!

it wasn’t like you were nervous or anything, but it was always a little nerve-wracking to experience something new for the first time. it’d been a while since you were introduced to the wonderful world of nijisanji, and it was about goddamn time you joined a fan server to meet other fans like yourself.

a spur of fans welcomed you with the discord welcome function. you grinned to yourself, replying back with semi-enthusiastic “hello!”s as not to seem too overexcited.

server daddy: welcome to the server~ we’re elated to have you here 🫶

millayyyy: stop being cringe 😬

server daddy: you’re just jealous you have negative rizz

ennaurrrr: the only person with negative rizz is mfing reimu endou

petra’s wife: stfu fucking enna alouette you literally hate me im not even part of this conversation

ennaurrr: yet you’re here ???

petra’s wife: 🫵 you're 😩 literally 🤢 horrible

server mom: calm down honeys you’re going to scare the new member 🫠

server daddy: okay calm the fuck down, let me talk to the newbie

you: 😃

you laughed to yourself as the group kept bickering in main-chat. it seemed slightly strange, but hilarious nonetheless.

were people in the nijisanji community this wild?

as the person supposedly ‘enna’ bickered with someone called ‘reimu’, server daddy himself, albeit his server nickname, sent you a dm.

his username was actually vox akuma, so vox was probably his name.

vox: sorry about them, they’re always unhinged.

you: it’s nothing !!! they’re super funny, and it just means they really cherish each other.

vox: wow, i don’t know if you’re seeing things or just really optimistic

you: it’s how i roll ✌️ no way you’re one of those gloomy types tho ???

vox: there’s a difference between gloomy and sexy/angsty.

you: is that what you’re going for 😃

vox: :)

you: okay, sexy/angsty, teach me how to have w rizz, if you have it (supposedly)

vox: are you doubting my rizz right now?

you: 🤡 maybe

vox: alright, i’ll give a rizz demonstration. hop on vc with me right now.

albeit a little skeptical at what was about to happen, the adrenaline and excitement from your hilarious conversation with vox fueled your urge to accept his call.

the first thing you heard when you got on the call was the smoothest voice you’d heard in your lifetime.

“well, hello there, darling.”

you were definitely, totally, only slightly taken aback. blushing from your head to your toes, at least that’s how it felt, you muttered a small “hello”, to which you received a hearty laugh as a response.

“told you my rizz was phenomenal.”

“your rizz is literally lowering by the second i don’t even know what you’re talking about.” you laughed, the self-confidence in his statement throwing you off.

“sure darling, sure. and where’s your rizz?”

“me?” you questioned, and he “mhm”ed for you to continue.

“well, babe,” you dropped your voice by an octave, attempting to sound swag, before bursting into a fit of giggles after vox snorted when hearing your voice.

“you are hilarious, i mean it. and adorable, at that.” he said, and the words came out of his mouth with such warmth you could imagine the smile on his face.

as the conversation continued throughout the night, you found out that somehow, you and vox had a lot of the same interests, talking for hours on end, and it happened the next day, and the next, and the next.

vox could feel himself sinking into what seemed like honey, sweet and sucking him in, keeping his heart fluttering in his chest incessantly. he knew it was stupid, to fall in so deeply with someone he’d just met, on discord, too. but it was the way you two clicked, the same conversations on the tips of your tongues and the sound of your laugh.

he was utterly enamoured with you. he groaned as he leaned back in his chair, always confused as to what to label your relationship. he’d done his best to try to push your relationship forward, but he was still unclear on what you thought due to the flirty nature of your relationship. were you serious? were you not? it flustered him.

he couldn’t take it anymore. you’d usually be on call with him already at this time, but something was probably holding you up. he pulled out his phone to send you a message.

vox: darling, are you home yet?

you: you make us sound like we’re married 😭

vox: do you not want to be married to me? 👁️

you: that’s not what i mean !!!

vox: then what do you mean

you: i’m getting home soon, i’ll call you to talk about it 🫶

the last heart at the end of ur message sent his mind into a flurry. what did you even mean by that? you were truly adorable, and there was nothing he could do to suppress the feelings that bubbled up in his chest.

about half an hour later, your call arrived, and he promptly accepted.

“vox?”

“hello. the trip home was nice?”

“yeah! but… i wanted to just talk about us.” you said.

your unsure tone frightened him just a little bit. and with his heart beating wildly out of his chest, he gathered the courage to open his mouth and speak.

“you know, y/n, really, i—”

“i like you.”

and with that, vox stood still for a moment, processing your words in his head. you just said that you liked him. his heart pounded even more erratically, but somehow he regained his calm.

“gosh, darling, you beat me to the punch. i wanted to say that first.” vox mused.

your flustered laugh resonating from the other end of the call only made him fall for you more.

#☁️ veetubers #☁️ vee’s #luxiem #luxiem x reader #nijisanji #nijisanji en #nijien #nijien x reader #nijisanji en x reader #vox akuma #vox akuma x reader

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labyrinthofsphinx · 14 days

Text

Statistical Outliers

Part 2 of drabble. In the middle of a few things so I figured here's a bit more in the meantime.

“Vox, I want it.”

Truth be told, he hadn’t been expecting to hear from Velvette for a minute. He had only just proposed that she could promote his newest and latest set of gaming headphones, which now come equipped with specialized noise cancelation. Specialized for canceling out radio static, of course. Anyways, Velvette had turned him down flat, saying the design wasn’t ‘on brand’ for her. What the hell was her brand if not part of his?

So, her storming in with demands was not on his bingo card.

“Fascinating.” He sipped a bit more of his coffee. Too much sugar, not enough cream. Memo to himself, throw the coffee boy off the tower later if this conversation gets him too worked up.

“Vox!” Velvette slammed her hand down on his console, a move very few ever dared. Too many things could go wrong if damaged, and he couldn’t afford a Val sized tantrum in this room of all places. Coming from Vel, this was even weirder. Weird didn’t replace anger though, so he forced himself to police in his emotions.

“Yes?” He said, pulling his grin across his screen as far as he could. It made him look more friendly, he reminded himself, and not like his shark friends currently swimming about agitated.

He didn’t get to see her reaction. Instead, she brought her phone straight to his face. It was a picture from an article, written about the newly reconstructed hotel and whatnot. The smiley freak was there somehow. Vox still didn’t know how he managed to survive being sliced down the middle. The picture distorted something awful around his face and figure.

He glanced up at Velvette, tugging her phone down just a tad, enough to look her in the eyes.

“What am I looking at?” He asked, slightly confused and more irritated the longer his conversation went on. He kept smiling.

She took her phone back, zoomed in on a particular part of the picture, then put it back in his face.

“This thing, I want it.” She pointed a long, painted nail at it, as if he couldn’t make it out from the extreme zoom she pulled.

He still didn’t get it.

She tapped at a picture of one of the new residents of Alastor’s failing project, someone of no consequence that he’s never heard of. He prides himself on his knowledgebase. The internet was literally accessible from his head. He knew just about everything about anybody: their likes, their dislikes, the numbers of all their friends, accounts they had, jobs they applied for, who owned whose soul, the works. This one? A literal nobody. A ghost, if you will. What little he had on him was from surveillance tapes, showing him driving around a fancy car. Aside from that, he apparently moved into the hotel. That’s it. That’s literally all there was to him.

He just raised a brow to her, giving her that look that tells her she has to explain more than she would in a text message. She rolled her eyes, but she went on.

“It’s adorable, and I want it.”

Again, another moment he was reminded of Velvette’s age.

An adult, but not quite an adult.

Adorable? Vox didn’t really think he was an authority on adorable. He was a good judge on other things, things he prided himself on. Sexy, sure. Suggestive, why not? Beautiful, naturally.

But adorable?

The kid (he’s about ninety percent sure he was a kid) was some kind of fox. His ears were far too big for his small body, which already made him look like a mouse. His eyes were a little too large for his head. And he had a bushy tail. Well, he looked kinda fluffy everywhere. But this is Hell. Every other person was fuzzy in some way. Angel dust was a spider for crying out loud, and he was covered in fluff.

He didn’t get it. Though, that didn’t mean he couldn’t take advantage of it.

“Well, certainly, Velvette! Whatever you want…though, from what I understand, he’s holed up in-”

“I don’t care. I’ll do the stupid commercial for those headset things, but I want this first.”

Oh, well, right to the point then. Another thing he liked about Velvette, she was direct about everything. And with that said, she stormed right out like the hurricane she came in as. Honest, he has no idea what she planned to do with the kid once she had him. Turn him into a fur coat, maybe? He didn’t really care, not so long as half of Hell can’t even hear the radio bastard anymore.

A quick tap into the mainframe had his eyes peering out the camera of one of his drones. Fixated on the hotel, he picked up on a bit of conversation. It was the usual bullshit, the princess spouting off whatever silly plan she had in mind to push the rest of them towards being ‘better’. Since when was writing heartfelt letters to someone next you considered in heavenly entry?

The kid wasn’t in view, which wasn’t surprising. Despite being probably the youngest of this group, he certainly worked the longest hours. Kudos to him, Vox supposes. He knows the hours of shooting Val puts Angel through, and the kid still seems to hold the record for longest day. And if there is anything he can get behind, it’s a strong work ethic. Or maybe he sold his soul to an insomniac. Either is possible.

Just as he considered jumping through other cameras, to see if he was taking his usual route, the car rolled up to the hotel. The kid all but leapt outside, skipping his way up to everyone.

“Charlie! Charlie!” He had a high voice, like he’d not yet gone through puberty. It sounded like a language version of the triangle, constant tinging.

He was vibrating with delight, jumping in place as the rest of the hotel looked on, confused.

“I’m officially on vacation!” He chirped, explaining before anyone even posed the question. “My boss went down to Gluttony for a week, so I’ve got the time off!”

At that, the princess was beaming. She started talking so fast and so pitched that he hardly caught anything past the idea of doing a full ‘activities’ week. He can only assume it was all more half measures towards getting these dogs some manners.

“Oh! I know just how to start!” Of all people, Lucifer chimed in. If his drone flew a little more skewed, it wasn’t because of nerves. “I’ll make pancakes!”

Oh, right. The king of hell was just as much of a pansy as his daughter. He keeps forgetting that. Mostly on account of how obscenely powerful he still was.

“Hm, all that bragging about cuisine, and all you ever seem to make are dull, tasteless breaded monstrosities.” His voice made the camera twitch unnaturally. The audio sounded distorted, like the microphone had been fried. A random pop almost made him jump from his chair.

Alastor’s smile was as annoying as ever, even when he can hardly see it through the distortion. Vox could feel his fingers digging into his panel without even thinking of it. In fact, he was only aware he was doing it because the sparks flying off his fingers got some feedback from its circuits.

Apparently, he wasn’t the only one to find the radio creep unbearable, because Lucifer was none too happy about that little comment.

“Oh, I’m sorry. Who asked the cannibal? I keep forgetting you’re only into greasy finger food.”

Vox snorted into his hand as Alastor’s hair bristled in annoyance. Would he prefer it if he was the one who caused him to get his hackles up? Sure, but he was never going to pass up an opportunity to laugh at his expense. Knowing Alastor, the unintentional dig at his mother’s jambalaya hurt way more than the insult to his weird cannibal diet.

His smile became more strained, like he wanted to gnaw Lucifer’s throat out, but before he got tempted, the kid pepped up.

“H-how about we bake something instead?” Ears folded flat against his head, the kid turned towards Angel. “Didn’t you say you wanted to make brownies?”

Angel, as Vox knew, wasn’t thinking about the same kind of brownies that the kid was. And Angel seemed to realize this because he immediately jumped into damage control mode, all four arms waving about like he didn’t know what to do with any of them.

“I, um, yeah! Sure! Brownies! That sounds great! Just…normal brownies.”

The angel girl shot him a glare, one that Charlie politely tried to redirect.

Oh, this could’ve been its own reality show. He can see what entertainment Alastor gets out of it, even if the investment isn’t worth the payoff.

“We’re going to need to go to the store then.” Alastor’s cat pointed out. Oddly, he wasn’t holding a bottle in his hand. Usually, he was one foot in the gutter by this time of the day. “The kitchen’s been wiped out.”

“Wiped out? How?” Charlie’s girlfriend hissed.

“Bugs.” Alastor’s other pet, the creepy girl, lifted a metal stick. On it, clusters of bugs dangled, legs still twitching. Val had mentioned meeting her in a club one time. That was the same day he noticed there was a bald spot around Val’s collar.

…yeah, no need to explain why the smiley freak keeps that one around.

“That’s okay! I’ll just run down to the store and grab some groceries.” The kid added quickly, before anyone could comment on the pyre of insects currently dying a slow and painful death.

To his own interest, no one offered to go with him. No one offered to go instead of him. A quick rewind of surveillance told him that the kid was usually the one grabbing groceries on his way back from work. It was routine. The only added thing was Charlie handing over a, frankly, stupid amount of money for food. The kid quickly corrected it to an approximate amount and handed the rest back. A smart move, he supposed. People don’t rob people without money.

Of course, that assumes people would want the money, and obviously Vox wasn’t interested in pocket change.

With a flick of his hand, he brought up his secretary. She blinked as she looked up from her pad to her computer screen, quickly reworking the fins making up her hair. She was always dressed a little too much like she worked for Val, but she was good at her job and he’s yet to find a replacement. So, for now, she stays.

“Yes, Mr. Vox?” She asked, popping her lips up into a heart shaped smile.

He snapped up an image of the kid on her screen, taken from his recent watch in.

“I need you to pick this thing up for me. He’s heading to the grocers on the corner of Scarlet Drive and Butcher’s row.” He said, noting as the kid was looking for a place to park. The cameras in that part of town were much more numerous. Without Mr. Smiley making everything go haywire, he had a much better view of Velvette’s new toy.

“…any special instructions, sir?” She asked, accentuating her neck.

“Yeah, make sure he arrives without a scratch on him. I don’t deal with damaged goods.”

With that, he hung up. Back to business as usual.

It played on in the background of talk shows and newscasts. He was never truly unplugged from everything. That didn’t mean he saw everything all the time, mind you. He did, you know, have a life. But if he wanted his attention elsewhere, he could always jump to something else in the digital network. Case and point, while he was in the middle of discussing the upcoming acid rainstorm, he caught eye of some of his men grabbing the kid.

It wasn’t much of a struggle. He was probably lighter than the groceries he was carrying. He hardly had time to utter a cry before he was pushed inside the car and driven off towards Vee tower. The car was just as automated as the rest of his devices. He’s never tried it, but he’d pretty sure he could drive it if he wanted to. Not that he did because, really, who had time for that? He did notice though that once the kid was shoved in the center seat, and held by the arms on either side, he didn’t protest. His ears were pinned to his head, so it was obvious he was scared shitless. His tail was curled tight between his legs, but his eyes were trained forward, like he was preparing to charge headfirst into a train.

This probably wasn’t the first time he’s been kidnapped. Not really too surprising, considering just how weak he was. It was just interesting to see him immediately know that fighting was never going to get him out of this situation. So, he wasn’t entirely dumb, at least.

Huh, this might just be interesting after all.

He finished with his broadcast, cutting to commercial before one of the pre-recorded segments went to play. He had just enough time to grab a coffee before meeting his men over in his lobby, the one meant for employees only.

He scrolled through his feed, pushing numbers, trying to see when and how would be the best way to appeal to the masses for those new headsets of his. Hey, just because he could hypnotize them all, doesn’t mean he has to. Many of them would just sucker themselves into buying it, especially if all the rest of their friends had a pair. That was a different kind of hypnotism altogether.

Two flunkies in dark suits dipped their heads when he walked in, brutes he doesn’t remember the names of nor would bother to. He looked down from his phone only for a moment, enough to register the shock on the kid’s face as he looked up. He expected him to be afraid. No doubt Alastor would’ve been ruining his (not so) good name at the hotel. Or, if not him, then he imagines Angel didn’t have much good to say either. Not that he paid much attention to Val’s employees. Honestly, the only reason he had to deal with or hear about Angel was because Valentino literally wouldn’t stop making him a problem. And, as said, Valentino’s problems always end up Vox’s problems.

Here's the thing, the kid looked afraid still, but there was something else there as well. Something he didn’t quite make out.

He flicked his finger, and his guards dropped him down. Surprisingly, the kid didn’t try to make a run for it. He glanced around, but probably quickly decided that, yeah, there’s was no easy path out. He looked back up at Vox, waiting for him to say something he supposed. Why should he though? He doesn’t owe him anything. This was all just a means to an end, and he didn’t have time for anything else.

“I take it you’re the smart type.” His attention went back to his phone, but he could tell the kid was waiting with bated breath. “Then you’ll know to shut up and do as your told and you probably won’t end up dead.”

‘Probably’, heh, he was lying to himself now.

The kid’s eyes watered, suddenly finding something interesting about the floor. Hm, didn’t want to cry, huh? Well, Vox would bet Velvette breaks him in less than a day. Insecurity reads to her like blood does to his sharks. There will be carnage later.

Vox walked towards the elevator. The kid didn’t automatically follow behind his coat tails. That was strike one. A jolt sparked as annoyance hit him. He snapped his fingers together and pointed down by his side. If he was going to give Velvette a gift, it was just the manners in him demanding he gave it in person, one of the few carryovers from his living days.

“Here. Now.” He demanded, teeth still clenched.

That seemed like more than enough encouragement. Tail tucked between his legs, he slowly joined Vox in the elevator. With a twinge of electricity, the lift began to rise. The kid, comically, almost fell off the edge. The lack of walls around the perimeter of the circle really got to him. So much so he actually moved closer to Vox, rather than be anywhere near the edge. Amusing. It would’ve been funnier if it wasn’t so pathetic.

There was the usual ting when they arrived at Velvette’s floor, and the doors opened to the usual chaos. Models and designers running around everywhere, most of them with sweat beading down their faces as their boss literally ripped a dress in two in front of one unfortunate stylist.

“Is there not a single one of you who doesn’t have shit for brains?” She roared, tossing the fabric mess into a garbage bin as the designer nearly passed out right there. “Who’s the moron who thought that pink polka dots were ‘in’ this season?”

“Oh, Velvette!” Vox stepped out, and people got out of his way. One overlord was already one too many for these people. Though, he noted, there did seem to be an unusual amount of relief when they saw him. No doubt they thought he’d rein her in like he usually did whenever she or Val went too far off the rails. Jokes on them, he was only here to drop off his end of the bargain and go over the commercial.

She turned and looked at him over her shoulder. To say she was in a ‘bad mood’ would’ve been polite considering the purse of her lips and the blood she was currently wiping off her hands. Her attention was half on him, and half stuck to her phone.

“What the fuck you want?”

The kid had snuck up behind him, too small and insignificant to be seen from outside his shadow. The staff that did see him twisted a bit in uncertainty. Vox curled a hand behind him and shoved him forward.

“Why, just bringing you a little present! Thought it would brighten up your day!”

Everyone in the room waited for a reaction. Many of those running about slowed or outright stopped what they were doing to watch what would happen next. Velvette herself blinked as she put down her phone.

Even more surprising, the kid gulped, took a breath, and brought a hand up in a nervous wave.

“Um, h-h-hello.”

Without the warping that just naturally came from any recording, the kid sounded younger somehow. His voice was clearer, but still meek. His ears flicked forward, twitching with tension, but trying to look friendly.

Well, he could read a room. He’ll give him that.

Velvette made an unholy sound. The shriek bounced in his servos like someone was banging a pot over his head. The vibration caused his face to glitch out and, by consequence, cause the whole fucking tower to blink like broken Christmas lights. He’s pretty sure the glass cracked in places, and the employees were bleeding out their ears. The kid had grabbed his own in a vice grip.

She finally stopped, moving with incredible speed and scooping the kid up like he weighs less than nothing. She started swinging him around like he was a new puppy, bad mood entirely forgotten.

“Oh my god, he’s adorable! Even better than the video!” She ruffled through his fur, tugging lightly on his big ears, before finally putting him back on the ground…only to tug Vox down and give him a quick hug around the neck. “Vee, you’re the very best!”

He forgot for a second that he didn’t just do it for her, because it had honestly been a while since she’s been so openly and nicely affectionate with him. It took him a second to reboot.

“Yes, I know.” He said, jumping right back into it. “Hold the applause for now though. So, have you had a chance to look over the design I sent you?”

She snapped up her phone and flicked something into the data cloud.

“I fixed it up, made it more appealing. Take a look.”

He downloaded it. She altered a few cosmetic things about it. The standard design didn’t change much but…

“Um, why did you make a version with ears on it?” Half of the denizens of hell had ears, many of them bigger than these ones. True, the techno aspect to them he can get behind. Speakers and glowing lights were added to the frame, making it cooler in dimmer light. But why ears?

“Because they’re cute. And cute is ‘in’ right now.” She stated, manner of fact, before turning her attention back to her new toy.

Well, okay. He could work with this. It wasn’t entirely off brand for his more technical projects. As long as it was kept modern looking, he could look past the ‘cute’ part of it. While he’s been mulling that over, Velvette has scooped up her new prize like she just won him from a carnival game. A million and one selfies later, she turned her attention to the kid’s wardrobe.

“While the 90s are making a comeback right now, we’ve got to do something about…all of this.” She picked at his shirt like it might give her lice. “Also, a collar.”

“B-but I’m not-” He started.

Vox cleared his throat, giving the kid a warning grin.

“What did I say about the talking thing again?” He teased.

The kids sighed but, promptly, shut up.

“I’ll have the testing design ready for you tonight.” He mentioned to Velvette. He would have it sooner, but now he had to install extra lights and speakers on fake ears.

“Good, I’ll start teasing about the new product. We’ll run the commercial after I’ve ‘leaked’ it.”

And as they both knew, the commercial was a Vox problem, not a Velvette problem.

“I’ll leave you to it then!”

Good. All’s well that ends well, he guesses.

As he went to the lift, he caught one last look from the kid. There was that expression again, the one he didn’t quite understand. It almost lingered on him, even as the door closed. In the last second before Vox was left to his own devices once more, he saw the kid opening his mouth like he was about to call out after him. He didn’t though. And the doors to the lift snapped shut.

Part 1/ Part 2/ Part 3/ Part 4/ Part 5/ Part 6/ Part 7/ Part 8/ Part 9/ Part 10

#hazbin hotel #hazbin vox #hazbin hotel vox #vox #hazbin hotel oc #hazbin hotel fic #hazbin hotel ficlet #hazbin hotel fanfic #drabble #hazbin hotel velvette #hazbin velvette #hazbin hotel alastor #hazbin hotel charlie #hazbin hotel lucifer #Alastor

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