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vitaminseetarot · 7 months

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PAC: What Does Libra Season Have in Store For You? ☁💗🌆

Happy Autumn folks and welcome back! I'm stoked. I enjoyed my first day of Autumn with some good ol cider. This is looking to be a very busy fall season!

NEWS! Starting tomorrow I will be heading out on a vacation trip for a little over a week where I'll be away from Tumblr for the majority of the time, so things will be pretty quiet on this blog until mid-October. But stick around because when I come back, I'll be bringing some Tarot games with me, sprucing up my page, and more! 🍎

(I also got a new desk which is going to make card spread layouts so much easier! kazoo)

So for now, I thought I would tune into the vibes of the upcoming sun in Libra transit and catch a brief glimpse into what it has prepared for you all this crispy cool season.

(Content warning: there is an image containing blood on one of the cards. It's from the Shadowscape Tarot deck. I will find a way to modify this card in the future.)

Please select one of the three sunset skies below. I will dub them Peach (1), Fuchsia (2), and Violet (3).

Pile 1: Peach Sky

Ace of Pentacles, Page of Cups, King of Pentacles, Six of Cups, Ten of Swords; Compassion, 21. Venus, 6. Sun - Light, Sadness

Hi pile 1! Your Libra season will be filled with a sense of grace. I feel like you've been going through some struggles lately and you're wondering if help is available. Libra season may be a good time for you to reach out to loved ones and anybody who can help you in your current struggle. It could be related to money. You're going to be near those who understand your troubles and may have advice which can re center you. With the open minded Page of Cups, you may receive a nugget of wisdom which can propel you to create something new.

You'll be able to reconnect more with your inner child during this next month. In the midst of struggling, we can often forget or neglect our child side which needs to feel safe in order to come out of hiding. You'll have chances to let small joys assist you in healing. Try watching that movie you've been thinking about, you might end up really enjoying it. These moments can help give you important insights into helping you heal something that's kept you down in the dumps.

You may likely have episodes throughout the month where your energy and drive take a dip and you'll have to sit some stuff out to process your thoughts for a while. I'm feeling a lot of this gloomy Ten of Swords energy is from various past issues. Nothing in your deck suggests rushing through this, if anything the King of Pentacles says "success isn't an overnight thing". Take the time you need to work through old sticky feelings that stop you from moving forward.

A lot of self care will be required for this solar season, pile 1. Give yourself the occasional indulgence, but look closely over your finances this month. Don't use indulgence as a distraction from getting important work done. Libra is a season of balance, and this pile is about the balance between prudence and play. Make time to regenerate yourself with fun, then tend to needed duties. Do what you can and stay open minded to receiving outside help from guides or people.

Pile 2: Fuchsia Sky

XVII Star, King of Cups, X Wheel of Fortune, Three of Swords, Six of Wands; Listening, 29. Ceres, 3. East - Beginnings, Frustration

Hey pile 2, it seems like for the first time in a while things may finally be looking up. During this time, you could meet someone who will be like a counselor figure to you (or an actual counselor). You will have someone who will be there to understand you. I get the impression that you recently went through some form of upheaval and lack the sensation of solid ground. Things are likely still in a state of flux during Libra season, but since the King of Cups has no trouble sailing over choppy waters, you can lean on that wisdom and spiritual strength to get through.

A lot could be changing in your life, or even that you're in the liminal phase of being from one place to another. It's like you're holding a train ticket that lets you visit any city you want. You're beginning to scratch the surface of what possibilities are out there for you. Decisions are hardly in the books right now. The key is to tend to what opportunities you would love more than others and allow the one you want to grow. Ceres wants you to be patient and deliberate with your moves.

Situations may come up where you're made to reckon with your old memories that have caused pain. I'm putting a content warning for blood on this pile and to be honest, even if blood doesn't trigger you there may be times in this month where something may trigger old wounds when least expected. On the flipside, this month also shows that you are undergoing a lot of change as to how you deal with these situations. Your reactions to old stimuli may change and you may find yourself being cool where you were once upset.

Although hope is forecast in your reading, you may not be in the right place to ring any victory bells. Achievement of something major is not likely to happen this month, for you pile 2 this will be a developmental month that will allow you to gently transition into the next phase of your life. Be sure to check in with yourself every now and then to congratulate yourself for the little things, even--no, especially when progress appears slow or all over the place. The time will come where you will feel more focused and determined to tackle something big, but for now appreciate the small victories and rejoice in silver linings of any kind.

Pile 3: Violet Sky

Page of Swords, Five of Cups, Eight of Wands, Ace of Wands, Five of Wands; Mystery, 6. Virgo, 22. Air - Motion, Love

Hello pile 3, This Libra season will likely involve education for you of some kind. You may be a student in school now or you're out of school but looking for something new to try. You could also be looking into new ideas or plans for your next year. I think this pile is really into the autumn season, like you guys are ready to let it go and slide into the next year. This season has you in a contemplative space where you get to weigh options. Though you may find some time to work things out, I think the month will move faster for you than you think. (If you're applying for scholarships or the like, check your emails vigilantly.)

You will definitely be blessed with a feeling of catharsis, as Five of Cups can talk about pure emotional release. Something has likely been an issue either in the front or back of your mind, some kind of long term issue involving relationships and making goals work. Your mind has spent enough time whirling around trying to solve the problem with pure logic. The only way to let go of the scattering thoughts is to allow the emotions locked in to completely flow out. Then the logic will work more effectively, like taking a jammed piece of paper out of a printer.

Some of you could have recently broken up with someone and you're figuring out how to move on with your life. Or there was a recent argument with a loved one. Something like that which creates a need to reevaluate one's path. Since one path didn't work out, what other options could be on the table? You're being given the chance to dive into anything without anticipating results good or bad. Allow yourself to explore and find something that either creates joy or helps you to release old pain (like an artsy workshop).

This month could open up a lot of chances for you to organize and set easier priorities for your life, for this year and the next. The catharsis will finally allow everything to move, both your actions and manifestations. You'll be amazed by how quickly and smoothly the pace will pick up after relationship issues are placed on the backburner (unless there's an urgent issue involved). Note that catharsis doesn't always involve crying it out; sometimes it can be done through a good laugh or even a great workout. You could find emotional release through whatever it is you'd like to learn. For some of you, this is your sign: It's worth looking into.

This reading has not been evaluated by the FDA to diagnose, prevent, treat, or cure any disease or infection. Please ask your physician before going online.

2023, @VitaminseeTarot ™

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ijafterhours · 8 months

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You can't fire your own family. Can you?

It's been ten years since Reagan finally assumed control of Cognito, against all odds. Her team is finally complete, and they're training the next wave of employees for their lives under the skin of America. Success is right around the corner. However, one of these new prodigies is starting to have second thoughts, at the apex of her most crucial mission. Reagans own daughter, Lara.

You heard it here first, folks! Inside Job; After Hours 2 is finally scheduled for its release, with the first episode dropping Sunday, October 1st! I'm so incredibly excited for you to follow Lara's journey this season, and i'll be dropping bits and bobs before release as well, so stay tuned for more, and get excited! The next chapter is right around the corner!

1.10.23. Inside Job; After Hours - Season Two, Episode One: Welcome to Cognito 2.0!

#inside job #inside job; after hours #inside job au #inside job fan project #after hours season 2 #ij;ah #renew inside job #lara higgins #reagan ridley #ron staedtler #ron x reagan #andre lee #toby miller lee #brett hand #logan hand #gigi thompson #glenn dolphman #magic myc #inside job netflix

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rainymoodlet · 10 months

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Kiss Me in Komorebi+ 🌸

[Episode Five] One Last Push!

And there we have it, folks! With a wonderful night of revelry, drinking, smoking, and revelations abound fully on the books, Daniel's settled down for a nice, long snooze before the very first Rose Ceremony of this Challenge!

Who will stay? Who will go? Stay tuned for the next episode of SimnationTV's Kiss Me in Komorebi+ to find out!

[ Part 30/30 ] 🌹

#ts4 #ts4 screenshots #ts4 gameplay #ts4 challenge #ts4 bachelor challenge #;kmik #sim: daniel #||#i could CRY seeing that 30/30 omg...#that is AT LEAST 126 caps for each solo moment alone...#my god #do not be surprised bc the rose ceremony has one post with text and the rest will be summarized in the bodies of the posts because #i will eat my own hands if i edit dialogue for a good while dfkhs #i'm so excited to get into the first challenge!!!#i hope you guys have had so much fun with this as i have!#i have loved being able to see dan with so many sims and learn so much more abt him and them :')#i miss actually PLAYING IT though dkjfhskfj so that'll be fun to get back to :')#i love you all!! i'll be around later~ my fiance has a job interview!

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kaiowut99 · 1 month

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Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters GX Episode 1 Subbed (Finalized Re-Release)

(Original Finalized Release Post)

(Check out my Subbed!GX Stream Masterpost!)

TURN-1: Yugi's Successor

On his way to the Entrance Exams for the Duel Academia High School, Judai Yuki meets the legendary duelist Yugi Mutou and receives a card from him. Running late, Judai arrives at the venue and requests to take his exam, but Instructor Chronos sees Judai's exam as pointless given his lackluster score on the written exam. A duel begins between Judai and Chronos, and Chronos's rare Antique Gear Golem card uses its powerful 3000 ATK to damage Judai. His back against the wall, Judai hears the voice of a Monster--which turns out to belong to the card he received from Yugi, Winged Kuriboh...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

...I first posted the original finalized version of this episode almost 10 years ago??? Time is an illusion...

Fresh off the presses, it's a re-finalized version of my episode 1 subs! Well, probably re-re-re-re-finalized given my penchant for consistency and quality after previous revisions in the past 2-3 years, between fixing a handful of animation errors and terminology revisions... But this one merited a new post not so much for any updated translations, but because after casually skimming through this episode a while back, I noticed more animation errors, all card-related, that I'm now able to fix as I have for episodes since. You know the deal with this one, I'm sure; new kid on the block bumps into the Game King himself as he runs late for his Academia exam and manages to hit one of the school's best with his skills--literally. Fun opening episode to a fun series.

With this, I'm hoping to officially call this episode finalized for good, mainly because the kind of annoying thing about doing further revisions now is that, thanks to my solid-state drive (SSD) failing in October of 2022, I lost my personal copies of the episode scripts with the ATK/DEF counters I stylize and all, so it means I have to cut/stitch together different parts of the episode between the fixes I applied and the previous hardsub to account for the stat-counter subs or the eyecatch subs I started doing--since the softsub MKVs I release don't have those specific subs, they're easier to update. So I hopefully shouldn't be touching anything before episode 84 (the first one I finalized after getting a new drive) again and those can ideally be considered finalized for good. I'm hoping I can also give that title to 84-109 (where I currently am), but I'd like to think I didn't miss anything, lol.

Anyway, as mentioned, this revision applies several card-related fixes to the episode, some of which replicate fixes 4Kids did for the dub that I took a cue from. The fixes were added to the last DVDRip I released, subsequently made into a new softsub MKV, both of which will be up on NAC soon with the updated hardsub. List below the cut below as always, for the interested~ (Nice thing with some of these is that the frame rate was usually consistent, which meant that editing most panning shots and the occasional zoom shots were usually more of a breeze than later on, haha.)

Enjoy, folks; with this out of the way, since it's been about two weeks since 108 and 109 were finished up, I'll start setting up stuff for finalizing 110 while doing a little more TFSP work here/there before I fully start on 110 sometime next week. Stay tuned!

Fixes & Edits!

*The bolded edits below were applied back in 2021 and were added into the original release post; adding them here for completeness.

Applied a card back to an orange rectangle that was a face-down card during the panning shot of the Exam Duels going on over the episode’s opening narration as it fades to Chronos watching, repeating the edit as it pans back around again before fading to Manjoume and Ryou/Asuka watching.

As Misawa's exam proctor says that he stands no chance against his Super Defense Deck, the blank-art cards on his Disk for Big Shield Guardna and Gear Golem the Moving Fortress are reversed (the wider side for the effect box should be on the right). Fixed by applying proxies on them for a frame in AfterEffects, masking in the card outlines for blending, before taking that frame into Sony Vegas and zooming it out for the zoom shot here.

As Misawa's Ring of Destruction destroys Vorse Raider, we see the smoke rush onto the proctor's side of the field--and as we do, we can quickly see the blank-art Big Shield Guardna and Gear Golem cards on his Disk are again reversed before the smoke covers them. Fixed first in AfterEffects by slapping the proxies on for a frame, then in Vegas by taking that frame into and keyframing it to the rapid panning shot for most of its 17 frames. (Incidentally, throughout this scene, a different error happens in the dub, where aside from keeping the cards' orientation on the proctor's Disk incorrect, they also shuffle between Gear Golem and Big Shield Gardna being Normal or Effect Monsters--bit of an identity crisis!)

Fixed the error with Misawa’s LP dropping to zero after he uses Ring of Destruction to finish his Exam Duel; should have dropped to 1300.

After the proctor's LP drop to zero, he congratulates Misawa on his win, but the Gear Golem card on his Disk is reversed. Fixed first in AfterEffects by applying my proxy for a few frames, then taking one of those frames into Vegas to lightly keyframe as the shot pans left. (As a fun editing aside, I could tell 4Kids likely edited this in a similar way to how I did because as the cards fade out, you can briefly see some residue of Manjoume's hair outline on Big Shield Gardna's card which they didn't cover up; I definitely made sure I went the extra mile with redrawing the arena floor to cover that haha.)

After Misawa thanks the proctor, we zoom out to Manjoume in the stands as the Solid Vision fades out, but the cards under Big Shield Guardna and Gear Golem are--you guessed it--reversed. Fixed in a few ways, with the goal being to redo Big Shield Guardna and Gear Golem fading out--first, in Vegas, I took the first frame after they're gone and zoomed it into place at the start of the zoom, which let me cover up Gear Golem and most of Big Shield Guardna, but because Manjoume's hair moves upward as the shot zooms out, doing this means I couldn't fully cover it. So, I then took this first post-fadeout frame into Photoshop, where I used the Clone Tool to duplicate the arena floor and cover up the rest of Big Shield Guardna, reinserting it into Vegas and applying the zoom keyframes I did to the earlier frames to it--this lets my edited frame properly zoom out with the shot. Once done, I went into AfterEffects and applied the Big Shield and Gear Golem proxies onto the shot's first frame, masking them above the cards, then took that frame into Vegas to zoom out with the shot (rather easily, luckily, thanks to the frame rate note I mentioned up top), masked out Big Shield and Gear Golem and made them fade out into the edited frame in the layer below. With that set, all I had left was to go back and mask Manjoume's hair back above the edits for the duration of the fade, which was pretty easy, and boom goes the dynamite.

After Judai's duel with Chronos starts, he summons out Elemental Hero Featherman, but the card gets placed reversed on his Disk. Fixed in AfterEffects by applying a proxy first to one frame during the initial light zoom-out in the shot, taking the fixed frame into Vegas to re-zoom and hold once the zoom was over.

Chronos reacts to Featherman's summon, and as Featherman lands in front of Judai, his card on his Disk is reversed again, but also as the screen pans right, for a few frames as Judai moves to then place a card face-down, the shadow under his left leg goes from being more gray to black, turning back to gray once he stops moving. Fixed in AfterEffects first by placing a correctly facing proxy on his Disk for a frame, which I then took into Vegas and re-panned into the shot; while in Vegas, I then masked in the gray leg shadow over the black, masking in part of Featherman's ATK/DEF counter over the edit to blend it in.

In the next shot, as Judai ends his turn and their LP counters pop up, the Featherman card under him on the field is reversed; fixed in AfterEffects by slapping in a proxy, masking Featherman back in above it.

[cont below]

(10) After Chronos uses Confiscation, as he sends Judai's Revival of the Dead/Monster Reborn to his Cemetery, a few things happen: 1) the Featherman card on his field under him on the field is facing Chronos in Attack Mode, and 2) it's in the wrong Zone on Judai's Disk, as it should be in Monster Zone 3. I fixed this a few ways, first fixing the Featherman-on-field aspect in AfterEffects, applying a Defense-Mode proxy under Featherman and masking him and Judai back over it; I then took a cue from 4Kids and took the frame immediately after his Cemetery stops being lit up (but before Judai starts to move) and the frames as Judai moves into Photoshop, where I copied the empty Zone 1 into place over Zone 2, blending it in with some minor editing, and combined it with the AfterEffects edit I then did by applying a Featherman proxy in Defense Mode to Zone 3. After throwing everything into Vegas, I then applied some masking to a solid-white color layer to replicate the lights coming from Judai's Cemetery slot (helped by the fact that, luckily, the lights don't move). (The dub, for their part, only handled the Disk aspect, applying a weird light to cover up their Zone 2 edit while the Graveyard was lit up, leaving the Featherman card on the field as it originally was, OCG format and all lol.)

(11) Chronos activating Heavy Storm causes a huge storm of wind on the field, and as it gets to Judai's field, we see that the Defense-Mode Featherman card on the field under Featherman is reversed. Fixed first in AfterEffects, applying a proxy in a frame where most of the card was visible and masking Featherman back above it, then taking that frame into Vegas where I first redid the panning that happens, then I created a solid-color layer colored like the wind and applied some masking to replicate the gusts of wind that blow over the card.

(12) After Chronos summons his Wicked Lord Tokens and the crowd reacts, the smoke on the field from their summon simmers down, but the Featherman card under Featherman is reversed again. Fixed in AfterEffects by applying a correctly facing proxy and then masking Featherman back on top.

(13) After the commercial break, fixed the error with a Ra Yellow student’s miscolored jacket as he and the others watch Antique Gear Golem being summoned, thanks to thepalebride’s help.

(14) After crowd reaction to Antique Gear Golem being summoned, Asuka looks out onto the field and says she unfortunately heard the sound of the Academia's gates closing shut for Judai--as she does, we see that the blank-art card under Featherman is reversed. Fixed first in AfterEffects by applying a proxy under him in the first frame of the shot and masking him back on top, then taking that frame into Vegas where I re-panned it as the shot pans upward.

(15) After a brief blush, Judai summons out Winged Kuriboh, but he places it reversed on his Disk--and in the very next shot, it's correctly facing such that its name box is to our left. Fixed in AfterEffects by applying a proxy as he places it on his Disk, masking his fingers over it.

(16) After Antique Gear Golem destroys Winged Kuriboh and Judai tells Chronos that it reduces his damage to zero--to Asuka's shock--Judai takes Winged Kuriboh off his Disk and places it in his Cemetery slot in a quick shot, but the card is reversed again. Also fixed by 4Kids, I fixed this in AfterEffects by applying a proxy facing correctly in the frames in which Judai moves it.

(17) After summoning Flame Wingman, and after some taunting from Chronos, Judai activates an arena as heroic as he is in Skyscraper, but as he does so, Flame Wingman is missing from his Disk, as it should be in Zone 3. Fixed first in AfterEffects by applying a proxy (after finding the best-quality screenshot of Wingman's anime art and touching it up using an AI tool [I think I settled on Waifu]), fading it in as the scene fades from the Judai closeup to Judai about to swing his Disk around, and adding it as he does so, then applying a brightening and dimming as the Solid Vision lights go on around him. Once I did that, I went into Vegas and applied some masking on the little flickers that pop up over that zone to blend the edit in. (Side-Note: while dubifying the Skyscraper card in Judai's hand, 4Kids forgot to mask in his thumb over it, begging the question... how is Jaden holding that?)

(18) Fixed the blank Normal Monster card that should be Flame Wingman, both as Antique Gear Golem crashes onto Chronos and as the duel fades to an end.

#GX #yugioh #ygo #ygo gx #yugioh gx #yu-gi-oh gx #yu-gi-oh! gx #my subs #Judai Yuki #Chronos de Medici #ahh humble GX beginnings #[hopefully i'm not only just finalizing episode 180 in 2034...]#[Reblogs for visibility are always appreciated 🙂]

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total-drama-takes-takes-2 · 6 months

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celebrity manhunt

Inside a small studio, a large desk wraps around two seats, an orange striped background and TV monitor decorating the set behind them. In one seat, a tight-faced, full-lipped gentleman with stark black hair holds a bouquet of cue cards. Next to him, a tight-faced redhead in a blue dress is holding a clearly empty mug.

“It’s a beautiful night here in Toronto, perfect temperature for the TV event of the season- that’s right, everyone- it’s time for the Gemmy’s!”

The gentleman fixes his bowtie. “We’re reporting live, just a block away from the action- it’s your faves, Josh-”

“And Blaineley!” the ginger cuts in. “Welcome to a very special episode of Celebrity Manhunt! Tonight is the night, folks- it’s time for gossip, cheer, and chatter about this year’s nominees!”

“Who will be taking home the gold? Stay tuned to find out!”

“Josh, that was my line,” Blaineley hisses. He rolls his eyes.

“In only half an hour, our field reporters will be walking the red carpet with this season’s celebrity stars- until then, let’s catch up with the juiciest gossip from the past year,” Josh grins. “With a special focus on our personal faves, and the audience choice’s- the Total Takes Island cast!”

“Those teens braved it all on the newly-resurfaced Wawanakwa island, competing in death-defying challenges and looking fly while doing it!” Blaineley squeals. “Just to come back for another season of screams, screams, and crazy teens on the set of Total Takes Action!”

“Those are some brave contract holders, especially after watching what happened to the other casts,” John winks. “And like our blasts from the past, these teens have scored a nomination in the category for Best Reality Ensemble.”

“Let’s cross our fingers for them this time, Josh,” Blaineley chuckles. Her smile seems forced. “But before then, let’s catch our audience up to speed with everything that’s happened since Total Takes Action closed its doors- or should I say, gates?”

"Sure thing, Blain- from breakups to makeups to arrest records and more, our stars have had a lot going on for them!" Josh grins. "O has been living the high life back home, but not before starting an advocacy group for those who were negatively affected by the psychiatric healthcare system. Peter was spotted giving a promise ring to his girlfriend, Lois- still going strong! And Kitty's been banned from at least eight national parks in the United States so far,"

"Speaking of spectacles, let’s talk about Alistair’s award-winning performance as Disco Horatio in the viral Broadway musical 70’s Hamlet, a pop-infused retelling of the classic play,”

“Alistair’s performance was so good that he even found himself a brand new fanbase of Hamlet-crazed fangirls- some of which have been taking things a little too far,”

An image of Alistair’s character in a Miku binder fixes itself on screen. It's been autographed.

“Yikes- but hey, if he's owning it, then more power to him! Next up, we're talking about the pop sensation band that’s been on everyone’s minds- that’s right, guys, we’re talking the Takes Three trio!”

Blaineley grins as a sequence of images of McLovin, Sha-Mod, and Joner starts overlaying the screen. “Our Total Takes faves shocked the world when they released their first album, Boi Tearz, to widespread critical acclaim,”

“The rap-swing-darkwave fusion has been called “surprisingly tolerable” by critics, leading the Takes Three to their own claim to fame outside of reality TV. Make sure to stay tuned, because we'll have them right here after the break!”

---

The Celebrity Manhunt logo flashes across screen and then fades as the studio comes into focus. McLovin, Sha-Mod, and Joner are all sitting beside each other at the end of the table, wearing matching outfits.

"Takes Three- you've been called international pop sensations by at least six Twitter users. How do you respond?"

"We're just grateful for our fans," Joner says, shrugging. "Making music for the world to enjoy is a rite of passage where I'm from."

Blaineley blinks. "The Midwest?"

"Yeah, it's been crazy. We've been signing all kinds of notepads!" Sha-Mod nods. "Big ones, little ones, ones shaped like circles..."

"I didn't even know you could make circle paper," McLovin shakes his head. "Our tour has been world-changing."

"Eye-opening," Sha-Mod agrees. "And to thank you for inviting us on the show, we wrote a song for you. Ready, guys?"

All three reach under their chairs and pull out three sets of bongos. They look between each other.

"I though I was bringing the bongos," McLovin says.

"No, you were bringing the synthesizer. I was bringing the bongos!" Joner responds.

"I thought you were taking the triangle!"

Blaineley and Josh look at each other, then back to the trio.

“So, boys, how has skyrocketing to commercial and financial success affected your bonds on a scale from “a lot” to “IMPOSSIBLE to ignore!”?” Blaineley asks, grinning widely. The three stop bickering and immediately turn to her.

“You know, we’re actually closer than ever,” McLovin states, matter-of-factly. “Our music is a really hands-on creative process.”

“Yeah, can’t have rap-swing-darkwave without the swing!” Sha-Mod smiles, setting down the bongos. "Or the rap- or the darkwave!"

Joner nods. “It's been chill. Our new album-”

“BORING!” Blaineley shouts, pulling a lever behind her. The floor under the three musicians disappears and they scream as they disappear. "All I heard there was "blah blah blah" let's get to the real juicy gossip, shall we? It looks like it’s finally splitsville for Patjulia.”

Josh chuckles. “Oh, yes, after months of vicious dating, our sources indicate that those villains-to-be have finally called it quits- and publicly, at that. Our undercover reporters came across this juicy little tidbit. Roll the tape!”

---

The monitor fizzles to life and focuses on the inside of a restaurant that looks like a tornado went through it. A chair flies across the screen and the camera whirls around to one side of the room, where Julia is screaming and throwing furniture.

“I should’ve NEVER even TALKED to you!”

The camera pans around to the other side of the room, where Patrick throws a handful of spaghetti back. “You should be HONORED I gave you the time of the day!”

“Your hair looks like a dead rat got glued to your head!”

“That’s rich, coming from a fake blonde!”

“IT’S NOT FAKE! We are so over!”

“You’re not breaking up with me! I’m breaking up with you!”

Julia throws a table and it sends Patrick flying across the room and straight out the back wall, creating a him-shaped hole in the plaster. He screams one final "YAHHH OH HOO HOOEY!!" as he goes flying.

---

“Yikes,” Josh chuckles. “That’s gonna leave a mark!”

“Where’s Scruffy during all this, you may ask? Well, they’re busy interning for Sierra of Reality, Weekly!” Blaineley announces.

An image of Scruffy wearing a pair of sunglasses and an earpiece, walking beside a woman with dark brown hair in her 30s flashes across the screen.

"What an upgrade from Total Takes, wouldn't you say?"

"Oh absolutely- especially after Wawanakwagate,"

Blaineley nods. "But, speaking of relationships- Bonsar- to date or not to date?”

Josh grins. “That IS the question! The two best friends were seen holding hands downtown, sending fans WILD! In a recent press statement, Caesar did little to calm the masses,”

---

The monitor changes scenes to a press conference. Standing before a crowd of reporters and microphones, Caesar adjusts his bow tie and clears his throat while Bonnie is sitting on the stage, playing on their Switch.

“I just want to restate that Bonnie and I are under no obligation to explain anything to the press,”

A reporter waves his hand. “So are you dating or not?”

Caesar smacks his forehead.

---

"Looks like trouble in paradise to me, Blain!"

"You said it, Josh! You know who's been sailing on smooth seas lately, though? Maxchela!"

"OMG, totally! Fans are still swooning over Max and Michela after they were named Reality couple of the year by Reality, Weekly,"

“Unfortunately, we here at Celebrity Manhunt were unable to reach the two for comment. Luckily, our star reporter under the pseudonym “Noco”, was able to get the inside scoop!” Blaineley smiles.

The camera pans over to Noco, who’s half-shadowed to protect his identity. He clears his throat. “I just want to say, first of all, that my findings have reliable and true evidence behind them,”

He stands and pulls a poster down behind him- revealing a screen covered in images of Max and Julia with strings between them. “Let’s say, hypothetically, that Maxchela was staged,”

The light above him suddenly flickers on. He sighs.

“OOOKAY THEN!” Blaineley says, redirecting the camera back over to her. “More on that later! In the meantime, we have a very special guest joining us today- one you Canadian viewers at home might recognize right away as the household name of the month!"

Josh grins. “When Chris McLean’s arrest became an international media sensation, sparking thousands of internet “memes” after his mugshot went viral, there was one name to take the claim to fame,”

“Toronto Environmental Coalition’s own leader, Albert, led an independent investigation of Wawanakwa after former contestant Scary came forward with a case- but it was him who found evidence of illegal radioactive materials on the island,” Blaineley continues, images of the investigation flashing across the screen. "The case brought international attention to the Coalition, and to Albert himself."

“The scandal broke the Wawanakwa mystery wide open. Here with us today is Canada's sweetheart, Albert,”

The camera zooms out and reveals a third person at the table. Albert- a teenage boy with dark brown hair, wearing a gray windbreaker- adjusts his lav mic and then smiles awkwardly.

“So, Albert- since your case went viral, you’ve been called a top-notch advocate, a genius, even a national hero. How does it feel to be getting all this attention?”

He thinks for a moment. “Um… well, I suppose at the end of the day the only thing that matters is the coalition, and the attention has drawn in a lot of donations!”

“Yeah, whatever,” Blaineley chuckles. “You’re the star of an international scandal- you’re a hero! How does it feel?”

“Uh… fine. I guess. What I’d really prefer talking about is the monthly agenda for the TEC, we’re planning on hosting a protest at a meat processing plant in-”

Josh clears his throat. “Our sources indicate that you and Scary were an item at one point. Is this true?”

Albert goes pale. “I- um, no comment, thank you,” he then leans in to whisper. “I thought we were going to be talking about the coalition.”

“On this show? No chance!” Blaineley shouts, startling him and sending him flying backwards. “Celebrity Manhunt is about the drama, drama, drama!”

Albert cringes. “Is there anything else we can talk about, then?”

"We can talk about the juicy, juicy drama happening on the red carpet right now," Blaineley chuckles. "Looks like the first of the cast has arrived to the Poultry Pals sponsored Gemmy's!"

Albert holds up a finger. "Um- what was that last part? The sponsor?"

Josh leans in, his palm against his face. He whispers. "Since ratings have gone down, award shows have corporate sponsors now. Turns out the meat industry is bananas for awards!"

"That's- that's the business I'm supposed to be protesting," Albert stands. "I have to go!"

He runs out of the room, and Blaineley rolls her eyes. "Guess we know why Chris McLean was acquitted and found innocent, huh?"

Josh chuckles. "That we do, Blain. That we do. But let's talk about these red carpet looks, cause honey these contestants are serving!"

---

The red carpet outside the Gemmy's is surrounded by shouting fans and photographers. O waves as he walks inside the building, followed shortly by Alistair, then McLovin, both so preoccupied with waving to the crowd that they crash into each other.

Another limo pulls up on the scene and Peter steps out with a short ginger. She shows off her promise ring to the paparazzi and giggles.

Peter and Alistair fistbump as they reach the door.

"Aw, how sweet. Friends forever!" Blaineley's voice overlays the scene.

"It's nice to see those teens getting along," Josh adds. "Ope- and there's Scary, just released from the lead prison she was stuck in from radioactivity!"

Scary arrives next, her hair dyed a warm honey brown. She makes a show of coughing and wheezing as he exits his limo in a wheelchair, then rolls up the carpet.

"My, my, aren't they looking just proper?" Blaineley tsks. "I love that shade of brown on her!"

A photographer gets too close with his camera and Scary stands, beating him over the head with her wheelchair, before sitting back down in it and rolling indoors.

"What a stellar start to the most anticipated award season EV-AR!" Josh squeals. "Let's check in with Noco on the field."

---

“Reporting live from… wherever I am,” Noco says, squinting. He’s holding a microphone and looking around, slightly annoyed. The cast looks relatively tame, most just merrily chatting with each other. “Here's, uh, I don't know. Austin or whatever. Hey, Austin, you and Kelly get back together?"

"No, baby, I've been single and free! To hell with monogamy!" Austin shouts, flipping on a pair on sunglasses, tearing off his shirt and running off screaming.

Noco stares into the camera. “Now can I do my Maxulia bit?”

“Um. No,” Blaineley says, still in the studio. “What is UP with these drama-less hacks?! Someone get Ass and Courtney here, pronto!”

Noco rolls his eyes and walks down the carpet, approaching Courtney, who’s catching up with Bonnie. “Comment?” Noco asks.

“Hm?” Courtney turns, then blinks. “Um, comment on what?”

“Ass,”

“Ugh. None, thank you!”

“I heard that!” Ass shouts from across the carpet. Courtney rolls their eyes.

Staci and Mal walk down the carpet next to each other, arguing about welding. Noco sighs. “Now can I-”

“NO!” Blaineley and Josh yell in unison.

Michela, walking alongside Max, stops suddenly and puts her hands on her hips. “Does this venue feel a little empty to anyone else?”

The camera zooms out- the group is on a carpet, but there's no reporters, no photographers, no fans to be seen.

“No, I see what you mean. I was thinking there’d be more… I don’t know, people,” Max says, then sighs.

“Did we get the right address?” Scruffy asks. “I mean, we’re all here, so we got sent the same e-vite, right?”

Mal pulls out her phone and reads intently. “Yep. This is the place,”

Another limo pulls up and Julia and Patrick stumble out, shouting at each other and having a slap-fight.

Joner and Sha-Mod look between each other. "Hey," the latter says. "Did we lose McLovin?"

Kelly walks up to the two and puts their hand right above their eyes, shielding their vision from the fluorescent lighting. "I don't see him,"

"Who else are we missing?" Michela asks. But before anyone can do a head count, a voice rings out from the distance.

"WAIT! WAIT! DON'T GO IN YET!" it shouts. The crowd turns in the direction it's coming from and Albert runs up, then collapses on the carpet, wheezing. "Don't go in..." he coughs. "Protest..."

"What's this supposed to be?" Ass asks, putting their hands on their hips.

Albert takes a moment to compose himself, then stands. He dusts off his windbreaker and pants, then pulls a small card out of his pocket. It reads "TEC Charter: LEADER".

"My name is Albert, and I am condemning this award show on behalf of the Toronto Environmental Coalition!"

"What award show, Einstein?" Ass snaps. "There's nothing out here!"

Albert looks around. Nothing but crickets. "Oh,"

Bonnie sighs and walks past him, approaching the doors of the supposed venue. “Let me guess-” they open one and the entire front of the building collapses. "Yep. Thought as much,"

“It’s CARDBOARD?!” Caesar shouts. “My hair took FOUR HOURS to do!”

“This has got to be some kind of Chris thing,” Staci says, crossing her arms. “Maybe it’s a scavenger hunt.”

“Oh, no, no way. I am not playing these little games again,” Ass says. “I’m going home.”

“Hey, everyone, we're still missing people,” Kelly says.

Austin pops out of nowhere. “Yeah, baby, where’s the rest of the party at?”

Courtney does a quick headcount, then thinks for a moment. "I don't see O, Scary, Kitty, McLovin, Alistair, or Peter,"

"Kitty's in an Australian prison," Patrick says nonchalantly. Everyone turns to him. "What?"

"Never mind that. We need to figure out what's going on," Michela says, hands on her hips again.

Mal chuckles from across the carpet. "Guys, you should see this,"

The crowd hesitantly approaches her, peering over her shoulder to see a live broadcast of the Gemmy's on her phone.

"And the award for Best Reality Ensemble goes to... the teens of Total Takes!" the announcer shouts.

Peter, O, McLovin, and Alistair look nervously around their seats, as if trying to catch a glimpse of where everyone else disappeared to.

"Oh, crap," Julia sighs. "We got sent the wrong damn address."

"Are you guys watching the Gemmy's?" a voice from ahead pipes up. The crowd diverts their attention from Mal's phone to see a scrawny boy standing on the street in front of them, drinking a slurpee loudly. "Cause it's a total hack. It's rigged by the woke police."

"Who are you?" Ass asks, crossing their arms.

"I'm Phillip, but you can call me Alejandro," he says confidently. "I was just out training, to fight SJWs. You know how it is."

He does a few karate punches. No one seems very impressed.

"Do you know where the Gemmy's are?" Courtney chimes in.

"Oh, yeah. They're way across town. They're wrapping up soon, anyway, you shouldn't bother with them. Everything comes to an end, after all,"

"Ooookay," Michela says. Max rolls his eyes.

"Do you guys ever think about how red slurpees make your mouth look like you've been drinking blood... heh... just me, then... I have a twisted mind,"

"Am I dead?" Ass turns to Courtney. "Did I die and go to hell?"

"Enough whining. I'm going home," Bonnie snaps.

"NOT so fast!" A voice shouts. The sound of a helicopter hanging overhead makes everyone jump and turn skywards. Chris McLean pilots the aircraft, making a smooth landing in front of the teens (but not before sending Phillip and Austin flying in the wind).

The disgraced host steps out of his helicopter, grinning. "You teens have a contract to uphold!"

"What is going on?" Caesar demands. "This wasn't in my contract!"

"Oh, right. You're "exempt" because of your "lawsuit"," Chris air quotes, rolling his eyes. "Bonnie, on the other hand..."

Caesar pales. Bonnie chimes in. "What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about a brand-spanking-new season of Total Takes- that's right- we're doing TOTAL TAKES: WORLD TOUR!"

No one makes any noise besides Scruffy, who squeals in delight.

"Thank you. Glad to see someone's excited,"

"Okay, let me get this straight," Julia starts. "You lie to us about the Gemmy's location, drag us to the middle of nowhere in Toronto, make us hang out with these freaks-" she gestures to Albert and Phillip. "And Now you're saying we have to do ANOTHER SEASON?"

"Man, you guys need better lawyers," Chris chuckles. "You have a long, long few weeks coming for ya."

The teens look between each other nervously.

"And not only you- as your contract dictates, any and all at the time of casting are required to join- that means you," Chris points to Albert. "And you," he points to Phillip, plastered against a nearby wall.

"You cannot be serious," Ass says. "I want to talk to your lawyers!"

"No can do, buddy. This is set in stone. See you all soon!"

He chuckles as he gets back into his helicopter and starts off, leaving the cast abandoned. They look at each other one last time before the screen fades to black.

#total takes action #total takes world tour #tta #ttwt #celebrity manhunt

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spnfanficpond · 4 months

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Weekly Pond Newsletter

Happy New Year, everyone! Wishing fantastic writing mojo for all of our writers and the time to read what we write to all of our readers!

Old Business:

December's New Member Spotlight - We welcomed in some new members last month! Click here to meet them!

Fishing For Treasures at the Ocean - This weekend is FFT weekend at the Ocean, and January's theme is Underappreciated Fics! Check out the @fanficocean to see some great fics from other fandoms. The Pond will be celebrating on the 20th and 21st of this month. This means you have until midnight (Eastern US/Canada time) on the 19th to submit links to all of the SPN fics that you think deserve more love! You can either submit a link via the blog with a note that it is for FFT, or you can drop a link in the #fishing-for-treasures channel in our Discord server!

Secret Santa Fic Exchange - Everyone should have posted their fics by now, so if you haven't, or haven't received your fic from your Secret Santa, contact @mariekoukie6661 and let her know. Some folks have asked for extensions, and she's keeping track of that. So far, she has links for about half of the fics, so if you posted, but haven't gotten a like or a comment or anything from Marie, let her know!

#TweetFicTues prompts - Since we missed last week, we have two sets of prompts for you!

New Business:

Angel Fish Awards - The post with the November and December Angel Fish Awards will go up in a day or so! Keep your eyes peeled! As for the Scoobynatural box giveaway, @mariekoukie6661 submitted the most nominations with a total of SEVEN! She has forfeited most of the box (she only wanted one thing out of it), so the rest will go to @spn-fanfic-reblog-writes, who submitted FIVE nominations. Great job to both for submitting all of those nominations!! (The regular drawing has not yet been done, so that announcement will come soon!)

SPN Rewatch: Fanfic Edition - Next weekend we will have our next Rewatch chat! We will be discussing 1.13 Route 666 and 1.14 Nightmare. Links to episode docs in the Archive should go up before the chat so you can enter your notes before the chat if you want. Stay tuned for announcement posts with the exact date and time!

Manta Rays in the Discord server - This week we have TWO Manta Rays hanging out in the server to chat with you! @spencereliotwinchester will be there on Friday, and @heavenssexiestangel will be there on Saturday after the Rewatch chat!

**Do you want to be a more active member of the Pond? Are you interested in actively supporting other writers and helping to make the Pond a better place for everyone? If you are, then contact one of our admins about getting promoted to Manta Ray!**

(Divider by @glygriffe!)

That's all for this week! To see all Pond events, and also other SPN-related things like conventions and online concerts, check out our Google calendar! Click here for a static view in Eastern US/Canada time (desktop only, no mobile app access, sadly), and click here to add our calendar to your own Google calendar! We try to keep it as up-to-date as possible. If there's something you want to see on the calendar that's not there (maybe a convention we missed, cast birthdays, or something similar), send us an ASK and let us know!

Hope you have a great week! - From your Admins and Manta Rays, @manawhaat, @mrswhozeewhatsis, @mariekoukie6661, @thoughtslikeaminefield, @spencereliotwinchester and @heavenssexiestangel!

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girlfriendsofthegalaxy · 11 months

Text

tuesday again 6/13/2023

very games-centric week

listening

this opening bit samples bowie's life on mars and sounds like a piano cover of a half-remembered but still beloved childhood anime. like the kind you had a set of two VHS clamshells for but only episodes 4-6 and 10-12. it goes on the "lofi beats to data and entry to" playlist. spotify

reading

fallow week

watching

the folks at waypoint games, formerly vice's leftist games vertical, BOUGHT THE BRAND FROM VICE and are rebranding as remap. i wish them all the fuckin best and i hope they succeed but i feel like we have maybe six months of this before one of them goes literally bankrupt from a doctor's visit bc healthcare is such a fuckin nightmare in this country. im simply not excited for starfield. i am not interested in corporate nasa

youtube

anyway i enjoyed their commentary, excited for compulsion games' southern gothic action/adventure spellcaster South of Midnight

youtube

neutrally optimistic about obsidian's Avowed, bc i do love obsidian but i do not love sword and sorcery rpgs

youtube

there's airships in microsoft flight simulator so i may genuinely buy one month of gamepass to try that out

capcom's path of the goddess looks fucking gorgeous but i have never played more than half an hour of a capcom game and i expect i never will. is this topdown? is this isometric? what the fuck is the gameplay mode??? who could FUCKING say

youtube

also there's a new jersey fallout 76 expansion coming at some point. in real life i hate atlantic city and i don't really how know this will look or play differently from point lookout. i don't know if i want to play a much-reviled cash cow mmorpg just to get postapoc jersey lore. if this leads up to 5 being set in nyc im going to be real pissed off. go somewhere DIFFERENT. there are DIFFERENT PLACES on the east coast!!! blease

playing

viddy game can consistently turn my brain off enough that i forget im moving cross country in two weeks and can forcibly relax my body for twenty mintues at a time between packing boxes. so there's been a lot of pomodoro-ing, or my version which is: pack until i get so anxious i physically cannot pack anymore, go have a snack, go play twenty minutes of a video game, and then go pack until i am on the verge of a panic attack again. this is not healthy but all my books are packed. all of these were free on epic at some point btw which is why i own them

the first time i played Airborne Kingdom, i lost track of time and beat it in one sitting in eight hours. the second time i played Airship Kingdom, i replicated that exact experience. i have allied with all the kingdoms and have like two hundred souls on board but am not QUITE selfsufficient enough to take on the northern/artic sea DLC. stay tuned. soundtrack in this thing is great.

youtube

bounced VERY hard off Close to the Sun, a bioshock-lite i put about four hours/three levels into. a huge gilded age cruise ship where the science has Gone Wrong would normally be catnip to me, but the game did brutally kill the player character's sister in front of me in an unskippable cutscene so we're done with that game now THANK YOU. it is very slow, which i do like in a game that gives you this much stuff to look at, but there is no gamma control. this game is so fucking dark. i played it in a dark room with no lights and it was still too dark.

youtube

pinged off the typing exploration game Epistory despite its charming art, bc fast and accurate typing is something covid has taken from me.

youtube

rediscovered Carcassone (online) which is great bc i love Carcassone and own a physical copy of the board game but no one else in my life loves it. tile-building countryside-building game, seconds to learn, etc. thank you board game review even though there are no meeple in their natural habitat (the board) in this picture

making

it's gonna be putting things into boxes for the forseeable future (the next week) and then living out of them for a while (the next two weeks after that)

#tuesday again #tuesday again no problem #Bandcamp #Youtube

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jadethest0ne · 1 year

Note

So I finished going through your 03 reaction thread (again, thank you for the link!), and was a little bit confused about your final thoughts after finishing S5. You seemed to really enjoy most of the series, but then at the end your final takeaway seemed to be "meh. was a'ight." Which! Is fine! The beauty of having so many competent adaptations of the same source material is that people are able to pick and choose their favorite continuity according to their own preferences and what they personally like in their media. But you seemed to have a lot of good things to say about the 03 show, but then your opinion suddenly seemed to shift somewhat near the end. And if it's due to S5, I get it, I did not like that season when it aired either (I think Rise is overall a way better take on the mystic concept in general), but the first 4 seasons are still some of my favorite TV ever put to screen. Absolutely not perfect, they have things they could have improved upon for sure, but definitely solid stuff. But of course, all that is personal preference, and everyone's personal preference is different. So what about the series fell flat compared to others that you'd seen? Did it do anything well or even excellently, in your opinion? Did you have any favorite arcs or characters or anything that you wish other series had also done because you liked them so much? How would you rank the 4 animated series in terms of preference (assuming you've seen all 4)?

Yeah... I figured someone would notice that about the Twitter thread...

To be honest, my reaction thread, well, wasn't honest.

Or at least, the thread was heavily influenced by my attempts to remain positive due to a lot of people, including folks whose opinions I hold in high regard, liking that version a lot. I didn't want to weigh people down with a lot of negativity. But as a result, my frustrations with the show started boiling over towards the end of the thread. That's why at first I seem to be very excited about it, and then suddenly started pointing out negatives.

Like I did for Rise and the 1987 TMNT, I plan to write a video essay on TMNT 2003 with a much more honest and critical take on it. So I guess stay tuned for that.

I'll give more detailed answers to your questions in my eventual essay, but in short:

It was the emotional and familial moments that fell flat for me.

Positives included the intricate plot and varied fight scenes.

Favorite arcs were Leo's character arc in Season 4, and the Battle Nexus episodes.

Favorite character is probably Leo for once. It would've been Mikey if the narrative didn't keep shitting on him all the time

I wish other versions of TMNT had just as solid a plot/overall arc and flow from one season to another (other versions were either disjointed, episodic, or cancelled too early to achieve the same kind of plot structure)

While I don't dislike this version, there are numerous things about it that bug me, and in terms of preference, this is my least favorite version I have seen so far

Sorry if my thread gave you the wrong idea of my opinion. That is totally on me for not being upfront, and trying to write more of what I thought folks wanted to hear rather than some of my actual thoughts. The positive things I said in the thread are still truthful and include things I liked. There were just lots of other things that I didn't like that I didn't include in the thread ^^;

Thanks for asking and allowing me to clear some stuff up!

I'll be trying to post the video essay about TMNT 2003 within the next month, so I can elaborate more on my thoughts there ;3

#tmnt #teenage mutant ninja turtles #tmnt 2003 #media analysis #jade thoughts #ask #jadethest0ne

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big-als-talk-time · 5 months

Text

The Ultimate Fire-Starter Kit Review Gone Wrong! (Disclaimer: Avoid Trying At Home!)

[Camera fades in to reveal a bright and enthusiastic content creator, standing in front of a table full of props]

Hey there, wicked fire starters! Welcome back to another fiery episode of Blaze It Up with Dave! Today, we have something truly explosive for you all—The Ultimate Fire-Starter Kit! Buckle up, because this is as unprecedented as it is incendiary!

[Dave takes a dramatic pause, staring off into the distance]

[Camera transition to a sepia-toned flashback scene. Dave, with a younger face, sneaks around a dilapidated building, holding a bow drill in their hand.]

Young Dave (with a mischievous grin): And they said watching primitive technology was a waste of time.

[Dave snaps back to reality, clears their throat and resumes]

Ahem!

[Dave nervously laughs and tries to move on]

So, without further ado, let's get started with the Ultimate Fire-Starter Kit!

[Dave picks up a canister labeled "Compact Controlled Igniter"]

Now, at first glance, this little beauty might look harmless, right? But don't be fooled! This bad boy packs a punch. I remember back in the day when I accidentally set my neighbor's grass on fire with this baby. Let's just say, that was the last time they invited me to their barbecue.

[Dave sighs, briefly looks remorseful, then shakes it off]

Alright, let's move on! Our next item is the infamous "Fireball Launcher"! Trust me, folks, this one is a showstopper.

[Dave picks up the Fireball Launcher, but suddenly gets a far-off expression]

You know, come to think of it, this fireball launcher looks eerily similar to the one I used during a street performance gone wrong... I ended up setting the town's Christmas tree on ablaze! Fun fact: The locals started calling it the "Fiery Failmas Tree." Hilarious, right? I didn't name it, so you can be honest.

[Dave chuckles half-heartedly, looking slightly uncomfortable]

Moving right along! Behold, the "Molten Marshmallow Flamethrower"! It's the ultimate weapon for roasting marshmallows to perfection! Just make sure to aim away from Fluffy, your favorite pet!

[Dave tries to lighten the mood, but their face shows unease]

Ah, memories! Speaking of pets, let's not forget the time I accidentally burned my parents' beloved garden gnomes to a crisp. You see, folks, gnomes aren't as flame-retardant as they seem! Their flesh burns just like ours!

[Dave tries to laugh, but it comes out forced]

Alright, let's wrap things up, shall we? This next item is called the "Inferno Surprise Box." It guarantees a surprise every time! Let's see...

[Dave hesitantly opens the Inferno Surprise Box, revealing an explosion that coats the curtains and table with lit napalm]

Oh fuck! What do I do! Uh, don't forget to like, share, and comment below on your own misadventures with fire. Keep it lit my fiery friends! Stay tuned for more epic content. See you soon!

[Camera fades out]

#writing

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tourdion · 5 months

Text

Podcast Title: "Three Bean Salad - Episode: The Cohen Conundrum"

Intro Music: Quirky Jazz with a Dash of Mischief

Host 1 (Henry Paker): Greetings, salad aficionados! It's Henry Paker here, your salad sommelier.

Host 2 (Mike Wozniak): And I'm Mike Wozniak, the bean buffoon.

Host 3 (Benjamin Partridge): And I'm Benjamin Partridge, the legume luminary. Today, we've got a salad sensation for your auditory taste buds – the perplexing world of Leonard Cohen.

Segment 1: "Cohen Quirks"

Henry Paker: So, chaps, what's the weirdest thing you've discovered about Leonard Cohen?

Mike Wozniak: Did you know he lived in a Buddhist monastery for years? I can't even manage a weekend without Wi-Fi.

Background: Laughter Mix

Segment 2: "Culinary Cohen Creations"

Benjamin Partridge: I did some digging, and it turns out Cohen had a peculiar fondness for artichokes. What do you think he'd pair them with?

Henry Paker: Knowing Cohen's taste for the poetic, probably a balsamic reduction with a side of existential reflection.

Background: Playful Banter

Segment 3: "Cohen Cover Culinary Chaos"

Mike Wozniak: Alright, lads, if Cohen covered a cooking show, what do you think it'd be like?

Benjamin Partridge: Picture this: Cohen narrating the slow, dramatic process of caramelizing onions. A symphony of sizzling and soulful poetry.

Background: Imaginary Cooking Show Music

Segment 4: "Bean Ballads"

Henry Paker: If Leonard Cohen wrote a song about beans, what do you reckon it'd be called?

Benjamin Partridge: "The Ballad of the Beleaguered Bean," a melancholic ode to a legume lost in a sea of salad greens.

Background: Humorous Bean-themed Imagery

Segment 5: "Cohen Comedy Challenge"

Mike Wozniak: Time for the Cohen Comedy Challenge! Tell me your best Cohen-inspired bean joke.

Henry Paker: Why did Leonard Cohen invite beans to his concert?

Mike Wozniak: I don't know, why?

Henry Paker: Because they always know when to 'bean' silent!

Background: Laughter Eruption

Outro:

Benjamin Partridge: And there you have it, folks – a Cohen Conundrum for the salad-loving soul. Until next time, keep tossing those beans and unraveling the mysteries of musical maestros.

Henry Paker: Stay tuned for more salad shenanigans and bean banter. Cheers!

Outro Music: Whimsical Fusion of Bean-inspired Jazz and Cohen Classics

#three bean salad

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burnwater13 · 18 days

Text

Mandalorian, Din Djarin, stands in a room filled with meat (heads) hanging from hooks, with the Darksaber ignited and held in his right hand. Bodies of people are strewn on the floor. Image from The Book of Boba Fett, Episode 5, Return of the Mandalorian. Concept Art by Brain Matyas. Calendar from DataWorks.

Din Djarin had pretended that nothing special had happened while Grogu was away at Luke’s Jedi Sleep Away Camp. Since Grogu had no reason not to believe the Mandalorian, he let it go. Their reunion had been exciting enough and, what with one thing and another, he hadn’t asked the bounty hunter or anyone else what he’d actually done during that time.

Of course that all changed when Grogu agreed to go to the Mos Eisley Food Fair with Peli Motto. His dad had agreed to let Grogu attend the event with Peli, knowing how much they both liked foods, especially foods that no one else would eat, even on a bet. The Mandalorian was going to stay at the garage and work on the N-1. That ship always needed something done to it. It was no where near as resilient as the old Razor Crest had been.

“Yeah, well, I’m sorry ‘bout that kid. I tried to find him one of those old rust buckets, but a lot of them are out of service. Seems like the New Republic is cracking down on ‘em for some reason. Probably yer dad’s fault. Now that Naboo starfighter is a beautiful ship, if a little finicky, but anything this of beauty has the right to be that way. Why I was just tellin’ Majordomo…”

That’s when Grogu tuned Peli out. He’d learned that as soon as she brought up the Twi’lek who worked for Fennec and Boba that she wasn’t going to stop talking about him until he showed up for their next date. Unfortunately, Grogu knew that next date wasn’t taking place for at least two more days. Uff. He was going to hear a lot of stuff about what makes for a good partner that he was sure he was way too young to learn and probably would be his whole life.

He turned his thoughts away from his companion and began to wonder what the best and most interesting foods were at the festival. Frankly, he was somewhat surprised that he hadn’t been asked to be a judge for the event. No one on Tatooine had as diverse a diet as Grogu.

They entered the queue to access the fair grounds and Grogu continued to ignore Peli and focus on the food as they crept forward slowly. He had to admit that he was a bit surprised that she was taking the slow pace of the line well. Usually she bustled ahead of folks, explaining that she was joining another group, was visiting the event organizers, was one of the event organizers and the like in a continuous stream of words that made Grogu wonder how she managed to say so much without passing out.

“It’s all in the rhythm, Kid. Breathe in, talk, breathe out as you talk, breathe in as you talk. I learned it from my old man. Ha! That man could talk ya outta yer own wallet!” At least that’s what she told him the first time he marveled at her super power.

But she wasn’t doing any of that kind of talking while they waited in that line. Instead she had managed to reach a point of describing the people she had bought the N-1 from, knowing that they had no idea what they had and therefore didn’t know it’s value which was just what she liked. Opportunity. Sweet, delicious credit filled opportunity.

“And yer dad almost spoiled it all insisting that he needed something more practical. Can’t imagine why that mattered. Not like he was ever bringin’ anyone in warm. That scar on his leg came from goin’ after that Klatooinian, what’s ‘is name. I guess usin’ that Jedi toy he got isn’t as easy as it looks. Any how, he followed my advice, which is always good advice and you two lucked into that N-1.”

What!

Grogu tugged on Peli’s leg coverings to get her attention as she launched right into a detailed description of the N-1’s engine control system and all the tweaks she had implemented.

“Huh? Whaddaya want kid?”

Grogu coo’d and grumbled his question at her. He knew he couldn’t trust himself to use any Gal Basic to ask his question he was so surprised.

“Whaddaya mean he didn’t tell ‘ya ‘bout it? Uff. Mandos, every one of ‘em filled to the brim with stories and an absolute aversion to sharin’ them.” Peli pulled in a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Are ya sure ya wanna hear ‘bout it from me? I don’t have that kind of time kid, if we’re gonna eat our credits’ worth here.” Peli pointed toward the rapidly filling fairgrounds.

Grogu really wanted to scold her about finding the food more important than the story, but considering how often he did that to absolutely everyone else, he put up with it. He pointed to the entrance and sighed.

“Okay, okay. I can see that y’er itchin’ to hear the rest.” Peli dropped her voice down to an almost whisper. “Now, I can’t vouch for all the details. I didn’t go there with him. But I did see that patch on his outer layer and mentioned that if he needed a tailor I knew a good one. He got all crabby with me, nothing new there, and said that if he wanted a tailor he’d bring one in warm. I gotta tell ya kid, I laughed out loud at that. Anyhow, he said it happened when he brought Kaba Baiz in cold. Like ‘head in a bag’ cold. Uff. Glad he didn’t bring that thing back with him. Klatooinian blood is hard to get out of everything. I once dated a Klatooinian…”

Peli stopped talking as soon as Grogu yelped like he’d been stepped on. He hadn’t, but he didn’t want to hear anything about dating Klatooinians. Uff.

“Dank Farrik! Will ya watch where yer walkin’? The kid is delicate and I’m not explainin’ any marks or dents on ‘em. You can explain it to his dad, the Mandalorian.” Peli barked at the stocky person standing just in front of them.

Grogu tried not to giggle as they watched the man quickly leave the line, looking all around for Grogu’s dad.

“I gotta remember to do that more often. Any how… where was I? Oh. Right. Apparently, in order to put together enough credits for the N-1, your dad went back to bounty hunting and collected a real bad actor named Kaba Baiz and he used that crazy Jedi sword to do it. Never could understand why Jedi used ‘em. Nothin’ but trouble. Any how, if you were thinking that delivering a head in a bag was bad, another one of those Klatooinians wasn’t that lucky. Now, that better be enough because I don’t want to ruin my appetite. Have your dad tell you about it. Frankly, I think he was missing you a lot and just wasn’t dealing with it well, but don’t tell him I said that. I don’t want to see him cry again like the last time I said anything about it. Hey! Here we are. Come one let’s eat!”

Apparently the person Peli had threatened told folks to let them through or a Mandalorian would be coming after them. The crowd had been happy to part and let the two of them cut through the line like a lightsaber. Grogu guessed that the rest of them had heard Peli’s story already and didn’t want to wind up cold or in a bag. He supposed that made sense, but he could have told them that he’d never known his dad to carry any bag with him since Grogu returned to Tatooine. Grogu had wondered why, but he was pretty sure he understood it now. Somethings did not need to be reused or recycled.

#calendar prompt a day #din djarin #the mandalorian #grogu #the book of boba fett

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wellntruly · 1 year

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knighthooded replied to your post "Happy Day After Oscars Day"

oh man I've for some reason kept putting off going to see The Fabelmans (partly due to those trailers you mentioned) and Aftersun (because I need to be emotionally ready) but it sounds like I've got some tickets to buy

amelodie replied to your post "Happy Day After Oscars Day"

I've similarly been putting many of these off, so thanks for the insights and encouragement! I'm really curious about these parasocial critic friends though. Who are some of your favourites to follow?

Oh man, my close personal friends! Many of them responded to The Fabelmans and Aftersun so similarly to me, while also some others really did not!! But maybe the true ~magic of the movies~ was the different ways they affected us all along.

Here are some of my folks and where you can find them:

Richard Lawson, Chief Critic at Vanity Fair His reviews are on VF.com, and he's one of the co-hosts of the 'Little Gold Men' podcast, one of my stalwarts. Next week I believe they will be doing my FAVORITE episode of the year, the one right after the Oscars where Joe Reid (stay tuned) comes on with his spreadsheet of what's coming out this year and, sight unseen, they have to make their wild guess of what's gonna win Best Picture. Do they replay their predictions from the year before too? Oh you bet. A riot. I'll add the link once it drops.

David Sims and Griffin Newman, co-hosts of the 'Blank Check' podcast David is a film critic at The Atlantic, Griffin is an actor and comedian, and 'Blank Check' is their podcast where they cover directors' filmographies, in...depth. These episodes are long as hell. You know you're lost in the sauce when you realize that's become a feature not a bug. I have an intro episode! It's the start of their Bob Fosse miniseries from last summer, on his first movie musical, Sweet Charity (1969). I mean first of all you should absolutely watch Sweet Charity, dazzling and a hoot, but even if you don't see it first, this episode is so great. A lot of it is from their dossier on Bob Fosse (the Fossier), as the introduction of this series, so it's a lot of fascinating history and context of both Broadway and Hollywood at the time, but also they're just all in a particularly bouncy mood and it's a treat to listen to. Ben Hosley, their weird little sound guy of a producer, is basically discovering in real time that maybe he loves musicals?? It is so fun. Anyway. Lots of running bits, sure, lots of guests also (hi Richard!), LOTS of hours, but I just vibe so much with the way these two love movies.

Joe Reid and Chris Feil, co-hosts of the 'This Had Oscar Buzz' podcast Let's just stay on the podcast train for a stop longer. Joe and Chris are both Oscar historians and freelance critics, popping up on places like Vanity Fair and Vulture. Their podcast has the pretty brilliant premise of covering movies that once had dreams of Academy Award nominations, but it all went wrong. Their appreciable cattiness is perfectly suited for this. They also have really good film festival recap episodes, for the current year. Edit: Ahh I forgot my intro episode! It is this one from February on Magic Mike XXL, a film I have not seen, with special guest, their friend Pamela Ribbon, the reason we got this moment, and every moment in this episode where I almost crashed into something laughing.

Emily St. James, of, sigh, I guess just Twitter right now Emily was recently laid off from her job as a cultural critic on Vox, in the on-going horrors of the media job landscape. I'm sure she'll be somewhere else soon, and can't wait. I've actually followed her longer than anyone on this list, and this is where this gets so delicate and complicated!, but you may actually be more familiar with her under her old name, as she's been a noted voice in especially TV criticism for decades, and really shaped The AV Club for years.

Fran Hoepfner, Bright Wall/Dark Room, 'Fran Magazine' First found Fran through BW/DR, where she still turns out incredible essays on the regular, now a loyal subscriber to Fran Magazine, her stellar newsletter, and she is easily the best Letterboxd reviewer in the business (not a business). She's just so astute and so funny, how the FUCK does she do it! Best in the business!

Demi Adejuyigbe, of one million things but on Tumblr: the 21st of September music videos He's just on Letterboxd, but we should be so lucky. Any time I have relayed a Demi Letterboxd joke to someone they've lost their mind. Most recently it was him calling the white love interest in RRR Phoebe Waller-Bridgerton.

I've just realized that of course, ALL of these people are also on Letterboxd. Haha what a dumbdumb! I've gone back and made all their names links to their Letterboxd profiles.

Well I hope this is more than you asked for!! Will update with more people I've surely forgotten.

#replies #knighthooded #amelodie #podcasts #Little Gold Men #Blank Check #This Had Oscar Buzz

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