#stay to burn verse

[summercourtship]

sway. (bruce's POV)

First half of the Sponsorship Gala, including Bruce and the Reader's dance. From ch. 3 of Stay to Burn (Only to Drown Instead)- this will not make sense if you haven't read that!! 2430 words |warnings: none

read on ao3 | stay to burn masterpost

Bruce was uncomfortable, to say the least. 

Even though he had willingly decided to become a public figure again, that didn’t mean he had to like it. And he certainly felt that his energy would be better used to patrol the city than stand in a building filled with the upper echelon of society and cheap wine, shaking hands and faking smiles. 

But he wasn’t at the event for social reasons, even though socializing would be necessary. 

His parents had often dragged him along to events like this, galas and fundraisers overflowing with opulence despite often being to raise money for those less fortunate. This, however, was just for the local university and he was only attending because of her. 

Bruce had replayed the contact lens footage from the second time he had gone to her apartment multiple times, his suspicions about her situation building with each detail he noticed. He doubted she suspected anything- she was probably barely even aware of the Scarecrow, as the media had dubbed him due to the mask he seemed fond of wearing. No, she was too concerned with her own life to realize that vultures were circling overhead, even as they swooped lower and lower. 

He had arrived late, not wanting to sit through the thirty-minute long presentation. He didn’t need convincing to be charitable, he was going to generously donate anyway. He watched as the crowd filed out of the auditorium, staying close to the edge of the room. But once one person noticed him, they all did. 

All around him, people were smiling, almost tripping over themselves to speak with him. He was polite with all of them, though he kept the conversations short. He hadn’t seen the girl yet, and he was starting to worry that she hadn’t actually attended when he spotted Dr. Crane, only a few feet away from him.

The man was standing with perfect posture, his demeanor closed off and cold as he spoke with a young woman. Then his icy eyes slid over her shoulder and locked onto Bruce. 

Bruce did not unnerve easily. But something in Crane’s expression raised alarm bells in his head. Suddenly uncomfortable, Bruce almost looked right past the couple until he did a double take on the woman. She looked much different here than the last time he had seen her- at first glance, she could almost pass for an actual socialite. But her eyes were much too lively, her energy much too excited. She didn’t have the airs of someone who lacked a soul. 

No, don’t approach, keep your distance- but before he could stop himself, he was approaching the couple, not caring that he was leaving a conversation unfinished.  

“Mr. Wayne.” Dr. Crane spoke first, holding his hand out. Bruce tentatively took it, overly conscious of how tense his body was, lingering unease keeping him rigid as he shook the man’s hand. “Nice to see you out tonight.”

He disliked how people talked to him like they knew him. Overly familiar just because his face was. But he remembered what his father would do at events like these and smiled, though he could feel how fake it was. 

“I needed some fresh air.” 

“I’m sure.” 

Out of the corner of his eye, Bruce noticed the girl looking from him to Crane, clearly intrigued. But she didn’t speak up. 

“My teaching assistant.” Dr. Crane gestured to the young woman beside him, who was becoming increasingly familiar to Bruce. He was already aware of her position as Crane’s TA, having learned it during his impromptu visit to her apartment. (Not that she knew that.)

It was that visit that had brought Dr. Crane to his attention in the first place, the syllabus on her couch and the papers she’d been grading about fear seeming too much of a coincidence to ignore. 

But she smiled, bringing him out of his thoughts as she reached out her own hand, saying her name like he didn’t already know that, either. But even if she knew he was the Batman, she would have no reason to suspect he knew her name- that was something he found out on his own time.  

“It’s very nice to meet you.” Bruce shakes her hand, clasping it in his own, smiling to match her own. It felt genuine this time, not the tight-lipped smiles he’d been dishing out to everyone else that evening. Did she see through him, was she able to look behind the facade he was wearing right now? 

Beside her, Dr. Crane was watching with an unreadable expression, his mouth tight and eyes slightly narrowed. Then he cleared his throat, as if uncomfortable with the prolonged contact of their hands. The girl dropped his hand, quickly looking over at the other man. A beat passed of the two staring at each other, a nervous smile on the girl’s face. 

What, exactly, was the nature of their relationship?

“Have a nice evening, Mr. Wayne.” Crane’s voice was short as he put his hand on the girl’s shoulder, leading her away. She followed willingly, as if she was unperturbed by the man’s behavior. 

“It was nice meeting you!” She called over her shoulder, her smile bright. He watched as she left, his eyes following the sway of her hips as she was led away. Then he frowned as he saw how tightly Crane’s hand was clenched on her shoulder, not unlike a claw digging into her skin.

Bruce continued tailing after the two, though at such a distance as to not arouse their suspicion. He doubted Crane would try anything tonight- Bruce didn’t even know for certain that Crane was the Scarecrow. 

But the most likely explanation tended to be the correct one, and there were too many coincidences concerning Crane for Bruce to not be suspicious. Who else in Gotham was an expert on fear and also skilled in chemistry? Crane was the only one who fit that description, and it was worth examining. 

He just hoped the girl wouldn’t make this more complicated than it needed to be. 

Bruce followed them into the ballroom, though the distance was much larger than he had planned due to people coming up to him and talking. Once again, he gave short answers, doing his best to not come across as rude but probably failing. By the time he escaped a particularly frustrating exchange about stocks, he had lost sight of them. 

However, it didn’t take long to find them again as they had not strayed far. 

Crane and the girl were dancing, chatting idly as they swayed back and forth. As he walked closer, he couldn’t help thinking that if he had planned better, he would have figured out a way to get to her phone and find a way to use it as a makeshift listening device. It would have been a better use of his time, standing at a distance and listening instead of waiting for opportunities to speak to them. 

He approached the couple, not oblivious to how they seemed to be in their own little bubble as they danced, speaking in low tones that Bruce couldn’t hear. 

But he could pop the bubble. 

“May I cut in?” 

The girl looked over her shoulder, her brief look of irritation at being interrupted replaced with a small smile when she saw who was interrupting her dance. 

“Of course.” Almost immediately, she let go of Crane’s hands, turning to him to speak quietly, “We can talk about it later.”

Crane’s hands lingered on her waist, flexing briefly as he clearly gripped her harder for a moment before he released her. He watched as Bruce took one of her hands in his own, his other going to her waist. Over her shoulder, Crane was staring at Bruce, the same unreadable expression from before on his face. 

Bruce simply nodded at him and led the girl away as the string quartet started a new song, something gentler and melancholic. 

Bruce had taken a few dancing lessons when he was a child, but anything he had learned was swiftly forgotten once he stopped going. He was lucky, then, that it seemed like she also didn’t know what she was doing and was perfectly content to just sway in place. 

“Well, Mr. Wayne, it’s nice seeing you again.”

“Please, call me Bruce.”

She smiled, her eyes crinkling at the sides. He never saw her smile like that before, certainly not when he was out on patrol. What reason would she have to smile when a vigilante showed up on her balcony? 

“Alright. Bruce. How are you enjoying your night so far?”

Her voice was unfamiliar, like she was putting on an air to seem more sophisticated than she thought she was. He knew what she actually sounded like, and wanted to draw her out. He wasn’t here to talk to a character. 

“Well, one of the last times I was at a public event like this a car almost hit me, so I think comparatively it’s going good.”

Panic flared behind her eyes, and for a moment he was afraid that his attempt at humor had backfired. Sounds about right. He gave her a small smile, hoping to convey that he was being light-hearted. She smiled back, but it quickly fell off her face as she looked down, clearly lost in thought for a moment, chewing at the corner of her mouth. 

He was about to say something else, change the subject because she seemed like her mind was stuck somewhere, when she finally spoke again. 

“I was there, too. At the funeral.”

He didn’t know that. He should have known that. He knew she was at the election party, her ticket stub on the corkboard giving that away. But how was he supposed to know that she was at city hall that day? He wouldn’t even be able to revisit the footage from that event because he didn’t have it- Selina had still been in possession of the contact lens at the time. 

He realized that his face must have shown his surprise before he controlled it. But to his surprise, she seemed relieved that he didn’t say anything, that he didn’t try to look sympathetic, and continued talking. 

“Mhm, I was writing a stupid paper and when all that started happening it was… Well, it felt important to document it.” She chuckled. “As if a paper like that would be important to the historical record.”

“You never know.” He disliked hearing her talk down about herself like that. She ignored him. 

“Anyway, I was waiting on the upper balcony with the crowd of normal people-” She smiled, quick, letting him know she was joking, “and had just moved to give someone else some space when the car came crashing through, so…” She sucked her teeth, making a tsk-ing sound as she trailed off. “Not as bad as, you know… almost being hit.” 

She was on the balcony? He wondered if she even knew she might have been rubbing elbows with Edward Nashton. It wasn’t public knowledge that he had attended the funeral, but maybe she had seen him and recognized him later when he was arrested. The idea of her being so close to him without knowing it made something twist in his stomach, something unpleasant. 

Her expression shifted at his silence and she cleared her throat before hastily changing the subject. He moved his hand from her hip to her lower back, unknowingly pulling her closer to him. The front of her body was almost pressing against his, the small space between them seemingly impenetrable by either of them. 

“So why are you here tonight?” She asked, her voice soft as she looked up at him. He didn’t break eye contact with her as he responded. “Enjoying the scenery.” It slipped out before he could stop himself, but by the look of gentle surprise on her face, she didn’t mind the unsubtle compliment. 

“And here I thought you were a shut-in with no social skills.”

He knew it was a joke, but the reminder of how he had failed the city before was sour. He didn’t blame her for bringing it up- he knew what people said about him, even if he didn’t care about any of it. But his refusal to acknowledge the city his parents tried to help led to multiple deaths, his negligence of their legacy almost ruined the city. 

Alfred told him he shouldn’t blame himself. But he did. 

“A lot has changed over the past year.” His voice was soft, and she seemed to take a moment to process what he said.

The song ended and the couples that were dancing parted to clap for the quartet. The violinist stood, announcing that the musicians were going on a break. She didn’t let go of him, and he didn’t let her go either. They stood, still joined, her eyebrows pinched together in confusion. 

“What do you m-” Her question was interrupted by an older man who, upon seeing Bruce, had decided that it was his god-given duty to speak with him at that very moment. 

“May I have a moment of your time, Mr. Wayne?” The man murmured into his ear, as if to keep the girl from overhearing. It took every ounce of self control for Bruce to not flinch away from the man’s hot breath, his words barely audible over the noise of the gala. “I would like to discuss your contribution to the university’s scholarship fund-”

The girl dropped his hand, pulling herself away from him. He allowed her to go, even if he desperately wanted to find a way to use her as an excuse to get out of another conversation about money. 

“Thank you for the dance, Mr. Wayne. I’ll leave you to it.” She spoke quietly, as if she expected him to not listen to her. He watched as she left, not paying attention to the man next to him. Though he wouldn’t be as obvious about it as he may have been a few years ago, he knew he needed to keep her in his sights. 

She was probably going to find Crane again, and he was stuck in another pointless conversation. But he’d find her again, think of another excuse to talk to her alone. 

After all, he hadn’t even asked her what he needed to, something that would affect everything if his hunch about Crane being the Scarecrow proved true:

What, exactly, is her relationship with Dr. Crane? 

bruce + reader's playlist | poll for next POV

#stay to burn verse #stbotdi #bruce wayne x reader #batman x reader #my writing #my fic #sometimes i write things and im just like “okay!” about it. like not excited but not worried #just okay.

[a-world-in-grey]

Life Debts and why Nyx's is a Big Deal

@secret-engima because I've been thinking on this and have Feelings.

Y'all can find SE's original post on Debt Braids here, but a short recap:

Debt is taken very seriously in Galahd. If you owe a debt, it's expected that you pay it off as soon as you can - via goods, services, etc. Very large debts between families can be settled through marriage, but as it requires both potential newly weds to be completely willing (Galahdians don't do divorce, you're married until one of you die), that sort of arrangement is rare.

A Life Debt is declared when a Galahdian believes they owe a debt they cannot repay, usually because the debt is so large, so personal, that a value of the debt cannot be given. In such a scenario, the Galahdian will declare a Life Debt and weave a Debt braid into their hair. A Life Debt is declared on that Galahdian's life. Only they can pay it, and once they die, the debt is fulfilled.

Now, this is where we get to just how serious declaring a Life Debt is. A Galahdian who declares a Debt is declaring that they owe this one person so much, that said person essentially now holds their loyalty over even the Galahdian's own clan and Chief. That loyalty stays until the Galahdian dies. If the person holding the debt dies, the debt passes on to their heir. When the heir dies, the debt does not pass on to anyone else, but even then, the Galahdian is not free from the Debt. Instead, they are free to choose how they will fulfill the debt until they die.

Because Life Debts are such a serious thing, no one can demand a Life Debt as payment. It is only ever voluntary.

So now we get to Nyx's Debt to Regis.

(I won't go into why Nyx declared a Debt - canonically we know Regis once saved Nyx's life, but exact details are for everyone's personal headcanons.)

On the surface, it's not that big of a deal. Oh, it's significant. It's a major commitment Nyx can never take back, but it's not really a problem.

Three things make Nyx's declared Debt significant, even by Galahdian standards. 1) The holder of his Debt is the Mainlander King. 2) Nyx is a Clan Chief. 3) Nyx is the absolute Last of his clan. Any single one of these wouldn't be remarkable, but together they turn what would be a significant but standard Debt into a nightmare.

Regis being an Outsider would normally not be an issue. Oh, there are Galahdians that sneer in private over Nyx declaring a Debt to an Outsider, because they believe Galahdians don't owe Outsiders jack shit. (Is it xenophobic? Yes, but Galahdians have a strong insider-outsider mindset and there will always be extremists in any culture.) But they keep their opinions to themselves because commenting on someone's declared Debt is just asking for a broken nose. Even Regis being a king wouldn't be anything other than an unusual detail (because just what happened that caused Nyx to owe a king a Debt?). The biggest thing about Regis being an Outsider is that to fulfill the debt, Nyx pretty much has to leave Galahd for Insomnia until the king and his heir die or one of them gives Nyx explicit permission/orders to return to Galahd. Which sucks, but that's what Debts mean. Regis - and later Noctis - will hold Nyx's first loyalty until Nyx dies.

Nyx being a Clan Chief is where things start getting sticky. A Chief's first duty must be to their clan. Chiefs, as a rule, do not declare Life Debts. They can't, not when they're first loyalty has to be to the clan, instead of a single person outside the Clan. In the very rare cases a Chief feels they must declare a Debt, they step down from their position as Chief. At least, they should. There's no clan law stating someone with a Life Debt cannot be Clan Chief, but a Chief in such a position will either neglect their clan or their Debt. Neither is something Galahdians regard favorably. There's never been a case where a Chief has refused to step down after declaring a Debt, so none of the Clans have ever had to decide what to do, but it's likely it would not end well.

Nyx being the very Last of his clan means that there aren't any other Ulrics he has a duty of care to as Chief. He is the only one affected by his declaration of Debt, so him remaining Chief Ulric isn't actually a problem. Where him being the Last becomes the final nail in the coffin is if anyone ever joins Clan Ulric. Because unless the Clans somehow find an Ulric that escaped the Burning, Nyx can't step down as Chief.

Nyx's first commitment must be to Regis. Then to Noctis. Not to his people. Not to his friends or any personal relationships. Not to rebuilding Clan Ulric. Any spouse/children/clansmen would always come second unless Regis/Noctis allowed it.

(Do I think Regis and Noctis would allow it, if Nyx asked? Yes. In a heartbeat. But Nyx would have to ask. Might even have to explain, and as a whole, Galahdians tend to be... reluctant, to explain their culture to Outsiders.)

I don't think Nyx really thought about the long term consequences of his Debt, when he made it. He might have, and could have decided that the situation was such that he was honor-bound to declare a Debt regardless. But Nyx has a reputation for not really thinking before he leaps into action, and depending on when Nyx declared his Debt? If it was after the Burning, after Nyx lost literally everyone, he probably wouldn't have been thinking clearly even if he had taken the time to think the decision over. And that's assuming he would have realized the implications in the first place - if Nyx wasn't raised to be Chief, it's very probable he wouldn't have.

Every other Clan Chief would have caught the implications. They would have known, from the moment they saw Nyx's braid, that the Last Ulric would never return to Galahd (not when the likelihood of Nyx outliving a boy 12 years his junior was slim to none). That the Last Ulric would likely remain the Last, condemning the Ulric Clan to die with him.

#ffxv #worldbuilding #galahd culture #galahd #Nyx Ulric #braids #working on my various Sola aus and realizing what it means for Nyx to declare that Debt #in most aus is doesn't end up being a problem because either Regis dies and Nyx transfers the Debt to Sola as his chosen queen #or Nyx never bonds as Sola's Sword before either of them die and is never confronted with that particular crisis #but in Sunshine-verse *Selena is still alive* and *still a child* for about four years after the Burning #...oh I work with that I can *definitely* work with that #then there's the Memories-verse when Nyx finally meets Sola again after Sola's supposed death (and actually *knows* it's Sola) #and he's smacked in the face with the realization that he can't stay with Sola because Sola doesn't want to return to Insomnia #and Sola has very good reasons for not wanting to go back but Nyx *has* to go back *because he declared a Debt* #and that Debt will go to Noctis on Regis' death because Sola is still 'dead' and Sola (now going by Rhea) doesn't want to be Sola anymore #so Nyx can't tell Regis or Noctis about Rhea because they'd want Sola to come back but Rhea *can't* be Sola #can't be the daughter and sister she was before she fell down Taelpar Crag #before Taelpar Crag it could have worked - Sola's first loyalty will always be to Noctis so she would have understood and accepted #Nyx being unable to give her his first loyalty even as her Sword (which is how it works in the fusion with SE's Blood of my Blood-verse) #(and in the fusion with SE's Nox-verse though Sola does ensure that Nox is aware of Nyx's situation when the two are courting) #it's unlikely I'll ever have Regis or pre-Crystal Noctis learn that Nyx declared a Debt or what it really means

[despairforme]

     The apartment was looking a little better now. He had bought a large bed. It had been a huge struggle when the delivery guys came. Nnoitra had done most of the carrying. The bed now took up almost the entire bedroom, leaving just a bit of room on the floor ( well, there was no room now, because Nnoitra had flooded it with dirty clothes ). The second thing he had needed to buy was a fridge. Considering how gluttonous Nnoitra was, one would think that he’d buy a fridge first and foremost. But nah, he’d been fine living off take-away. The different boxes were stacked on the kitchen counter. The fridge was on the smaller side. No point in having a big fridge when he always ate the content anyway. He till needed to get a table and a couple of chairs. Yeah, IN CASE he had a friend come over, he’d want someplace for them to sit. Just the fact that he was considering having visitors was proof that he was feeling better. Being busy with getting the apartment habitable had actually improved his mood. He had feared it would have the opposite effect, and just drain him, but nah. He felt better.

#[ slowly coming out of his depression for a bit ] #[ i mean it's chronic so it's always gonna be there but he's heading into a good period i think!! ] #[ i'm glad omg please stay in a good mood nnoi ] #[ it's sO refreshing ] #[ anyways! i gotta write on my book now! ] #[ my daily 1k needs to happen ] #[ but i always prioritize writing ONE thing on nnoitra first <5 ] #[ want him to know he's the most important thing to me <5<5<5<5 ] #[ also my day just doesn't start out right if i don't spend it with HIM ] #[ him him him him him my light my inspo i love him so muchhhh ] #[ OKAY enough gushing about nnoitra ] #[ hope you're all doing good guys! i'll be back to write here later i hope! just gotta work on my book first! ] #despair for me. ╱ in character. #burn the city. ╱ main verse. #slice of life.

[rumor-imbris]

If your hate can be such burning your love must be the sweetest inferno What I wouldn't give for your flames to set me on fire

#set me on fire I like it the way it burns #ratonhnhaké:ton #connor ac3 #connor kenway #ac3 #assassin's creed 3 #ac edit #acedits #ac3 edit #my ac3 edit #assassin's creed 3 edit #ACIII #Assassin's Creed III #my words #poems on tumblr #poems for him #mywords #free verse #love notes #since I'm melting over here let's stay themed #♫ set me on fire I like the way it burns ♪

[oathofpromises]

starter for: @crystalmarred

It made no difference how badly they all wanted to make up for what had happened to her. Astrophil's golden eyes scanned the royal room, the final resting place of Stella as they knew her. Funny how they called her Star lover or cruel, she couldn't tell which it was at the moment. The Light Warden's eyes narrowed as the chain holding her to the chair kept her there. The last ditch attempt she had made with what little human was still present. Despite everyone's best efforts, she was ultimately their enemy. The last Lightwarden they had to kill in order for the first to be fully free.

"You know, Exarch..you really should learn to give up. How frequently do you visit me only to be met with the same outcome? Stella as you once knew her is no more. Every ray of love and brightness she possessed is dwindling away. You've simply come here to attempt to make up for the guilt that's been eating away at you. Your attempt to save me from this situation failed, yet instead of letting me perish as Stella in the void, you rescued me. WHY!! SO YOU AND YOUR SELFISH PEOPLE CAN LIVE IN PEACE, TO SEE ME SUFFER MORE? Was it worthwhile to lose the Warrior of Light again, please? To feel helpless as I struggled in pain, my hair turning white, my eyes turning yellow, and wings growing out of my back."

The Light Warden's tone was icy; she was sick of him coming here to attempt to shake the weight he felt. How the Exarch would have to bear the responsibility for this every day. Slowly, Stella stood up. The two of them were now a very different height. In a flash, she was back to her normal height.

"You were always concerned with protecting your people, not me, Exarch. Although the scions might think you wanted to spare me from my fate, take a look at where we are today. I am a Lightwarden, and rather than letting me pass away, you all cling to the hope that the Stella you all like is still inside. I'm sick of your games; give up on this. Dead ends and broken promises are the only outcomes. Then again, you should already know how it feels to break a promise, since you've been hiding your true identity from everyone and using me to further your plans the whole time. You did nothing as I was put through pain and anguish. Did you honestly think your scheme to steal my light would succeed? that you could leave this planet without any regrets. No. This ache in your chest is yours to bear forever."

The Lightwarden raised her hand and placed it on his chest. Her lips curled up into a devilish grin. Thoughtlessly playing with other people's emotions, but hadn't he already done the same? He didn't say more than he thought was necessary. No matter how many times he expressed regret, the strain on the woman was much more than he could have ever imagined.

"Tell me Exarch…or should I say G'raha? I was merely a tool for you to use, despite your pretenses to care. Just a weapon that you can use to aim at your opponents. I'm sick of seeing your face around me. All you do is hurt me. Leave now, before I let myself go and devour your flesh and aether."

Stella's lips were parched because she hadn't eaten in weeks after she changed and a part of her was still resistant to doing so. She didn't want to have to consume another person just to keep herself alive. It would break the last bit of humanity the former Warrior of Light had left. The tiniest piece of Stella that the Au Ra was frantically attempting to hold onto. She squeezed a little when her lips were just millimeters away from the Exarch's ear, grabbing him by the neck.

"You secretly take pleasure in this, don't you? Having the legendary defender of light all to yourself. G'raha, what do you want? Be sincere; after all, the small portion of me that is still alive refuses to dig its teeth into the tiny portions of you that are still human. Is this just a way for you to get out of guilt, or is there more to it? I've never understood your motives beyond utilizing me to absorb light."

Stella's golden eyes met G'raha's ruby red ones as she released her hold on G'raha's neck and turned to return to the throne. Slowly, the woman sat down and leaned on her arm while waiting for the other to talk. His future depended on what he said. Would he be allowed to leave here unharmed, or would the Lightwarden tire of his games and ultimately sink her teeth into that tiny piece of flesh that remained to the other? He was trying so hard to save someone that no longer existed. How long would it take for G'raha to finally understand the Warrior of Light he had come to care so much for was gone.

#— ❛❛ //Final Fantasy XIV ¦ Burning Light and Shattered Stars・ 「 Stella LightWarden Verse」 #— ❛❛ //G'RAHA TIA¦・Promise me you'll take me on your next adventure. 「 CRYSTALMARRED」 #shb spoilers #— ❛❛ // STELLA CAELUM ¦ Blazing Light and Shattered Love・ 「 LightWarden Stella AU」 #Hopefully this is okay starter figured it takes place right after that fight and she ends up staying in that throne room

[oatbugs]

trying to find a suitable translation of the poem from which my name primarily comes from is actually impossible . persian is untranslatable.

#the way me and the person i was staying w in sweden talked abt this ..made my heart hurt a little but also made me glad that i understand #such a special language. persian is made for song and poetry and so the etymology and layers of each word are carried in their meanings #to a far stronger extent than other languages ive seen including english. this makes communicating in a straightforward way #much more difficult. it makes ambiguities more common and one could easily commit some horrid #epistemic crimes against another person by warping the meaning of their words. but it makes lyricism and poetry and anything which is #supposed to have depth and meaning so much more beautiful. which is why translating a good persian poem is so so difficult. yeah you could #use the word beloved but you could also use heart you could also use soul you could also use breath you could also use stomach you could #also use life etc etc . even with more common words.. its just. the only way to get it is to translate each word to a sentence/multiple #words but then the work would lose its impact . idk #thinking abt نقطهٔ عشق دل گوشه نشینان خون کرد #this is seemingly a simple line from the poems sixth verse found in only 3 of its manuscripts. gooshe neshinan is maybe literally #translated as corner-sitters or corner-dwellers but really it means more intellectuals/contemplators/academics but it could also mean #the isolated or lonely or the people who are waiting for something. now combine all the possible meanings into one english word. you just #cant carry the same meaning and depth even for such a simple phrase. the entire line would be #the point of love made the contemplators heart bleed. except heart is also love/stomach/life/soul/etc etc. point is also dot and the sharp #point of a blade. to make bleed could also be to be bloodied or to become blood. its not that #آتش آن است که در خرمن پروانه زدند #fire is that which burns the harvest of the moth. except it has the implication that the moth is also burned whole and #that love is a form of annihilation. moth is also butterfly. khorman means harvest but it also means crop and mass and product and shock #and halo around the moon and the aura of something bright and unseperation. now combine all of that into one english word. #it is also what made me mildly frustrated with non-persian scholars writing on hafez and persian poetry arguing about what translation is #correct when the point of persian lyricism is that the beauty of the verses stems largely from the layers and layers of meaning. love is #annihilation but inherently it is also an unseperation. love is all consuming in the way the halo of a moon is and the way laughter #that wraps you in light is. you are destroyed unwillingly. you are both the butterfly unravelling and the moth burning. #all one short line. i want you to understand why i chose this name and also to understand the poetry i was born from #and why it rests on the table in our new years table and why it is used to cast fortunes and why poetry is pilgrimage and a point of #worship for us and the sheer weight this language carries!!! #(خرمن) #(beside every definition given above it also means thrill and fruits of labours and Time and panic and damage) #my brain was built around a poetic construct from the moment i was born im so happy about that

[doomxdriven]

a wonderful little amagai sketch i had done by @artpikuuhnah !! ain't it grand?

#;caught in the burning glow (shusuke amagai | images); #//you should check out the artist's stuff! they do good commissions!! #//in my head i envision this as a post-blood war captain!verse amagai. outfit mostly stays the same but he adds on the #//little shoulder guard things to his haori #//good stuff

[masterofaster]

「 @universestreasures​​ 」 issued a challenge:

Jack finds Carly passed out at her desk from staying up all night working on a story. What do?

The very first thing Jack does that morning after finding Carly asleep across her desk was to close her laptop. Thus preventing any and all annoyances from her job from disturbing the peace that only settled over this small shared space when Carly was allowed to rest. There was rarely a quiet moment since he'd gotten here. If it wasn't Carly herself checking on him it was that outright irritating boss of hers making a racket. It took every ounce of willpower he could muster for Jack not to barge into view of their video conferences and give him a piece of his mind each time the man raised his voice at her for not submitting a story worthy of publishing.

It irritated him because she had the opportunity to quiet the obnoxious man if she’d just write about him and what she’s learned about the once great Jack Atlas. Especially if she was to confirm the rumor of him being from Satellite for true. And yet, she didn't take advantage of it. Advantage of him. He pressed down harder on the laptop lid than he had meant to, causing the computer to creak and bend under his palm. He swallowed what he assumed to be anger bubbling up his throat, back down to his core. And there it remained.

He nudges Carly's shoulder, before realizing she wouldn't budge. The quiet sounds of her breathing peacefully seemed to drown out his efforts. Jack finds himself staring down at her for a minute too long, eventually removing her glasses and placing them on the desk not too far from her.

Standing up straight now to remove his trench coat, which was simply sitting over his shoulders, Jack moves to drape it over her as a makeshift blanket. He had no doubts he could carry her, even with only one good arm. But he couldn't guarantee he wouldn't stir her from slumber that way. And he rather not risk this first quiet morning in many.

Jack ultimately decides to make his way around to the kitchen to prepare some hot water for coffee and cup ramen he found a small stash of for them for breakfast. Seems Carly had good tastes in food as well. He respected that, even if her coffee was a rather cheap brand.

#universestreasures #My Number One [universestreasure | Carly] #QUERY「asks」 #WITNESS THE TRUE KING「ic」 #VERSE.// CRIMSON CHAMPION #.//oh boy it was so difficult to choose which verse to put this in #.//ultimatly I CHOOSE THE TIME CARLY IS TAKING CARE OF HIM WHILE HE'S STAYING UNDER THE RAYDAR #.//i like the idea of him seeing how hard she works despite never letting the burn out & exhaustion show :'] #.//jack has prime house husband potential he's just spoiled #.//i also love filling in their blank periods with simple times like this #.//quiet moments like Jack finding Carly sleeping at ungodly hours and places within her own place because she gave him the bedroom #.//times where Jack stubbornly refuses Carly's offers to the room once he's recovered #.//and he just sleeps on the couch #.//with his boots on

[queensconquest]

@anomieheld​ continued from here ( if you want ! )

   The  progenitor  gave  a  snort  ,  a  sound  that  carried  the  faintest  trace  of  amusement  at  her  remark.  “  Fair  enough.  “  He  couldn’t  say  he  was  much  better.  Even  if  given  the  opportunity  on  occasion  to  be  elsewhere  and  celebrate  ,  he  always  chose  to  stick  to  himself.  Though  his  cause  allied  them  ,  he  didn’t  have  a  spot  among  them  and  he  never  lost  sight  of  that  matter.

   He  shrugs  his  shoulders  at  her  questions.  “  Maybe  because  of  that  ?  That  it  might  be  the  last  time.  There’s  no  guarantee  of  tomorrow  or  what  might  happen.  At  least  that’s  what  I’ve  commonly  heard  people  say  over  the  centuries.  “  Suwa’s  gaze  flicked  away  from  the  city  line  to  the  crowd  below.  “  You’re  not  the  first  nor  the  last  to  carry  that  trait  ,  especially  when  it  comes  to  war.  “  His  head  tilts  back  slightly  ,  looking  slightly  upwards.  “  I  don’t  know  how  I  used  to  be  before  I  became  this  “  Disgust  seeped  from  the  word  but  he  continues  on  -  “  But  at  least  from  my  age  now  -  the  best  you  can  do  is  plan  the  most  likely  and  be  adaptable  enough  to  change  as  needed.  “  He  stays  quiet  ,  lingering  over  the  thought.  “  It  is  impressive  how  easily  some  seem  to  be  able  to  slip  into  celebration  and  relaxation.  “

#anomieheld #exactly xD they both say nope to the crowds #theyll stay far away thanks #〉you are a walking contradiction of monster and slayer〈 — † ⌜suwa⌟ #〉nurturing this seed of rage burning inside〈 — † ⌜suwa ons verse⌟

[icarusplunged]

@crowgreeds​ said:

“what if instead of stopping you, i’m just another avalanche?” (for keon)

❝ well, well. someone tell the world – kaz brekker admits he’s no better than i. ❞ a sigh; he turns his head from where he lays on the floor, moving his cigarette hand down so he can see brekker better. ❝ i think that’s exactly what you are, ❞ he says, voice low, after a moment of silence. ❝ when it comes down to it, you and i are opposites, but also just the same. like looking into a cracked mirror. ❞

#ic. #keon threads. #keon verse » post-rebellion: i guess i'll burn in a lake of fire. #crowgreeds #keon bond » crowgreeds ( tell me we're dead and i'll love you / even more. i'm surprised that i say it with feeling. ) #{ !!!! } #{ this wont stay short for long but its fine }

[summercourtship]

I really enjoyed your Edward fantasies in the alternate POV series! Will you ever do something similar for Jonathan? 💕 I love how you write his character!

Thank you so much! I don't have many for Jonathan (idk why but Edward's were just really easy to come up with, he's just.... a perv I guess) BUT here, take these (some were mentioned briefly in his POV of ch. 2, and most of them are honestly just extensions of scenes from STBOTDI- I see him being the type to pull from his real life and create realistic scenarios that COULD happen whereas Edward is the type to create imaginary and unrealistic scenarios)

general content warnings for dubcon (due to drugs) and unhealthy relationships

While Jonathan enjoys the thrill of secretly drugging you, he is also incredibly intrigued by the potential of you finding out. While he knows, logically, that you should be horrified when you find out, he wonders if he would be able to convince you to not only agree to him continuing to drug you but also to learn to like it. This was only heightened after your second encounter with the Scarecrow where you had a true taste of the toxin... There was something intoxicating about seeing you truly terrified and vulnerable and the idea of you still wanting him and still allowing him to fuck you... Nice.

Of course, he has lingered on the thought of what could have happened at the Sponsorship Gala in that secluded hallway, what might have been if you hadn't been interrupted and if you hadn't run off. How he would have continued to tease your flesh, how he would have pulled your dress up just enough to reveal your underwear... He wouldn't have gone all the way, maybe fingered you a bit but his intent that night was not to fuck you. Just make you want him a bit more lol. you're harder to manipulate if you're horny or desperate

What if he had decided, that night you saw him in the alleyway, to reveal himself to you then? Would you have been afraid of him still? Better yet- would you have wanted him still, would you have let him take you against the alley wall... And yes, he would probably have the mask on.

Probably the least realistic of his ruminations, but sometimes he thinks about you being one of his patients. He's already crossed so many ethical boundaries with you, why not add another to the list? This has more to do with the power dynamic and you being vulnerable, but he also likes the idea of being the only person you can trust... the only person who you can depend on... even, the only person in your life at all (that might only be the case if he managed to get you into Arkham, which isn't likely but he could try if he was so desperate to have you locked away somewhere just for him). If you were solely dependent on him, you'd let him do anything to you, use you however he liked... hmm.

Side note: here's edward's fantasies if you didn't see that.

#the alleyway scene was going to actually be in the fic but it was cut VERY EARLY in planning lol #my writing #jonathan crane x reader #scarecrow x reader #stbotdi #stay to burn verse #ask #astarionposting #also I saw one of ur posts on pinterest the other day and I was like !!! I know them !!!!

[adelha-mathilde]

Continuation of this fluffy cuddle session with @despairforme here:

The flower shop was actually a building with three floors. The first floor held the flower shop. The second floor held the living spaces. While the third floor was a greenhouse for Adelha to grow her various herbs and flowers as well as some vegetables and fruits. A cozy and welcoming feeling in every room. But the activity would be in the living room on the second floor. Since that was where the Paw Posse were giving Nnoitra hello woofs and happy licks.

Five minutes are spent with Nnoitra being adored by the puppies. Which leaves Adelha time to set out the ingredients for making them a meal. The only one of the Paw Posse not interested in joining the cuddle huddle being Aqua. The feline more interested in slinking from the couch and to the kitchen to try and distract Adelha from her meal prep. Which just has Adelha chuckle to move her foot up and down as Aqua plays with her toes.

But there would be a ring of the doorbell for the Tibetan Mastiffs to pause and then wander to the stairway to see who came to visit. But Wesson stays right in Nnoitra's lap to just keep giving his hands kisses. Adelha not looking concerned as she smiles. "Aha. It would seem my cousins are here for the daily walk to the park we have set up. Do not worry, Nnoi. They are aware that I scheduled a visit with you and will just herd the pups out the back door. You don't have to meet with them if you do not feel like it."

Wesson gives a happy yip to then stand on his hind legs and give Nnoi's chin more kisses. Which has Adelha pause to actually look and grin. "It would seem that Wesson would rather play with his best friend. Why am I not surprised. He never does that with anyone else, mind you. Now. Nnoitra. Would you like for me to make grilled steaks, grilled chicken, or both to go with the pasta salad and the fried rice I am making? Or. Would you like for me to teach you how to make these side dishes to have at home?"

#main verse #Burn the City Verse #The Paw Posse Meets Nnoi #Wesson will stay instead of going to the park #Wesson loves his bestie Nnoitra

[despairforme]

What if another man who was "straight passing" as it were came out of the closet to him as gay?

❝ I doubt they'd come out 'ta me, 'cause they'd be thinkin' I'd beat their ass. ❞ Yeah, people did not come out to him in person. Nnoitra was the sort of person who appeared to pose a DANGER to LGBT people. He was the sort you'd think: He might hate crime me. So gay people kept their sexuality hidden from him, for their own safety. Nnoitra might even actually beat up a gay guy, if he was one of those stereotypical gay-boys, but of course, a 'straight passing' dude would not be like that. If someone like that DID come out to him? He didn't really know how he'd react. Would he too out himself to him? MAYBE. If the guy was hot as hell, and Nnoitra really wanted to fuck him. It all depended on how they'd met. If it was someone from work, then no way would Nnoitra risk having his sexuality come out. But, if it was some guy who didn't hang out in the same spaces as him on a regular basis? Then yeah, he might tell him he was bi, so that they could fuck. He would be kind of worried if someone came out to him. He'd wonder what about him made someone think he was OKAY with gay stuff.

#[ very interesting ask anon! :O ] #[ didn't think about that scenario before! ] #[ thank you for sending! ] #[ nnoitra really is the kind of guy most people would consider dangerous ] #[ and also he openly displays homophobia and bigotry ] #[ so an lgbt person would probably want to stay closeted around him for their own safety ] #despair for me. ╱ in character. #talking shit. ╱ answers. #burn the city. ╱ main verse.

[ma1dita]

partners in crime

luke castellan x fem!dionysus!reader [the trouble!verse]

MAIN SERIES MASTERPOST

summary: few things are certain in this life as a demigod, but one thing is for sure— you can’t fight fate when it pulls you and luke castellan together, over and over again. two young people who hate the gods are more like them than they think, for better or worse. annoyances to best friends to lovers

things to know: dionysus!reader's nickname is trouble & most of these can be read as standalones!

here's a playlist (spotify & apple music links now available!)

child of dionysus headcanons!

trouble!verse moodboard 1 & moodboard 2 & college!trouble by the lovely @24kmar

deleted scenes from a different universe (AUs)

play the extended cuts (blurbs from in-between)

character study: luke castellan & trouble

any works, updates, thoughts, musings, etc about this series will be tagged under #trouble!verse !

key: fluff - ☼ angst - ☽ smut - ☆ jo's favorites - ᥫ᭡

[rewind to before] pre-established relationship

trouble always finds me (trouble!reader origin story) 1.7k ☼

The one where he could tell you were trouble from the day he met you. (You're an annoyance, but not an enemy)

entropy ☼

The one where you both blur the lines between annoyance and admiration. (the promise of becoming partners in crime)

buddy system 4.2k ☼

The one where he comes with you to rescue your younger twin brothers, Pollux & Castor. (this is as close to a real quest that Mr. D will give you--might as well take someone you trust!)

somebody's angel 4.4k ☽

The one where you convince him he’s pretty, even with a scar. (songfic - Die Alone - Finneas)

feed the fire 1.2k ☼

The one where his focus is not on spilled food, but on you. (Luke realizes this is more than playful banter)

bedtime stories 2.4k ☼

The one where night shift with him runs late, but you don’t mind at all. (the both of you have feelings you want to admit, but duty calls!)

crazy little thing 3.4k ☼

The one where he uses all his drachmas to make you smile on Valentine's Day. (the Apollo kids are better matchmakers than Aphrodite, sometimes)

anything you want 1.6k ☼

The one where you and him have your first kiss. (You've always loved teaching the story of Orpheus and Eurydice; except when your Orpheus runs away from you)

said he likes crazy 2.1k ☼ ☽

The one where only he can help you with a bad day, even if he's avoided you since your first kiss. (For being a son of Hermes, he has a way of calming your nerves)

[pause and remember us like this] established relationship

play pretend 5.1k ☼

The one where Mr. D catches you two in the act, but you and him aren’t exactly together yet. (Drunk words are sober thoughts. Your dad just wishes Luke told you instead of him)

a wish your heart makes 1.4k ☼ ☽

The one where you share dreams, burn cookies, and it still reminds him of home. (The dryads will probably ban you from the kitchen after this)

chance encounters ☼

The one where you both daydream about different lives. (You think you'd find him anywhere, by soul alone)

to see the chaos through ☽

The one where he remembers he was never a good guy, just yours. (Luke makes the ultimate deal with the devil in order to save you)

not your goddess ☽

The one where you both know the best of days eventually have to come to an end. (songfic - Goddess - Laufey)

don't blame the kids ☼

The one where you both chaperone a trip to Mount Olympus. (the Olympians are bigger gossips than you thought they'd be)

trouble's coming for you 3.7k ☼

The one where Percy meets his two favorite counselors at Camp Half-Blood. (three times Percy is oblivious (and in the way) and the time he realizes you and Luke are in love)

now that we're older 3.5k ☼

The one where he asks if you can stay the night even if all of cabin 11 makes fun of him. (Luke is tired of the routine. He just needs his girl)

if you need to be mean (be mean to me) 1.5k☽

The one where he leaves before you wake up. (songfic - I Don't Smoke - Mitski )

[fast forward until we meet again] post-tlt

lovers, or partners in crime 2.1k ☽

The one where Annabeth and Percy think you’re guilty too. (the last day leading up to Luke's betrayal)

love like a blister: the five stages of loving losing luke 4.7k ☽

The one where you learn to mourn someone even if they’re still alive. (the five stages of grief after facing a loss)

to catch a thief 3.7k ☼ ☽

The one where duty calls at Camp Half-Blood. Again. (Your reunion with Luke isn't quite what you expected.)

solipsism 5.3k ☽

The one where you finally pray to Hestia to keep your home safe, even if he's also trying to destroy it. (the four times Luke uses Backbiter to visit you during college ft. the first time you trust a god to help you)

angel with a broken wing ☼ ☽

The one where he falls from grace and still thinks of you. (the four women Luke Castellan risked it for and how it will end up killing him)

love me dry (LATEST ADD) 4.5k ☼ ☽

The one where he meets you at his mother's house, though both of you didn't expect the other to be there. (a glimpse into May Castellan's idea of a perfect day)

when the curtains close☽

The one where you lose two people in the Labyrinth that day. All strings are cut. (Annabeth and Pollux find out the biggest difference between you and Luke.)

asking for trouble ☽

The one where Luke's final wish is to see you. (He's himself again, and all he wants is to find out if the trouble was worth it all)

as above, so below ☽ ☼

The one where you plead your case with the gods of Olympus. (The one thing the fates didn't expect was how much you'd both be like your fathers; in a way, you and Luke didn't see it coming either)

ask to be added to luke/general taglist 🥹

#made by ma1dita ♥︎ #luke castellan x reader #pjo series #luke castellan x dionysus!reader #pjo imagines #luke castellan x reader fanfic #percy jackon and the olympians #percy jackson and the olympians #🪽 #trouble!verse #percy series #pjo x reader #jo's navi <3

[oathofpromises]

𝕮𝖑𝖔𝖚𝖉 𝖍𝖆𝖙𝖊𝖉 𝖙𝖔 𝖆𝖉𝖒𝖎𝖙 𝖎𝖙, 𝖇𝖚𝖙 𝕷𝖊𝖔𝖓 𝖜𝖆𝖘 𝖗𝖎𝖌𝖍𝖙. 𝕿𝖍𝖊 𝖙𝖜𝖔 𝖔𝖋 𝖙𝖍𝖊𝖒 𝖍𝖆𝖉 𝖇𝖎𝖙𝖙𝖊𝖓 𝖔𝖋𝖋 𝖜𝖆𝖞 𝖒𝖔𝖗𝖊 𝖙𝖍𝖆𝖓 𝖙𝖍𝖊𝖞 𝖈𝖔𝖚𝖑𝖉 𝖍𝖆𝖓𝖉𝖑𝖊 𝖆𝖑𝖔𝖓𝖊, but both men always felt it was better to shoulder all that pain themselves than let anyone else take on that burden. It was bad enough that they had all put so much pressure on Sora’s shoulder. The boy was so young, and yet so many people expected him to give up everything and anything at the drop of a hat. Slowly, the blonde's hand clenched, her eyes narrowing as he recognized a familiar light within the brunette that he had seen in a younger version of himself. Although, it felt like he saw a lot more Leon in the young hero than himself. There was still darkness lingering inside his own heart. It sometimes got too much for him, and he was afraid internally that it might corrupt those he cared about. 

“I’m alright..I told you before,I’ve handled much worse.” It was true, the blonde had faced a lot worse trading down the path of darkness as long as he had. It was a lonely path. Maybe that’s why he seemed to cling to spending time with the others like this. They used to share cots all the time, so, it wasn’t every surprising to catch any of the others around. Perhaps it was Cloud own wish to keep close to his own lights. Long ago, he had let them slip out of his hands, and regretted it for years. 

Blue eyes froze, as they caught sight of the large scar on Leon’s chest. The other hadn’t talked about it much. They all figured maybe it was tied to a painful memory. It did look like it caused Leon a lot of pain, though, which was even more obvious as the brunet seemed to struggle to get his armor off. Combined with the sore muscles from the countless heartless battles they fought today. With quick reflexes, Cloud catches the high potions, letting out a low grumble before taking at least one. 

“I’m only taking one..who knows what kind of enemy we’ll face tomorrow. Seems they are getting more sneaky. Not surprising but still..I wonder how the kid and the others are doing. It’s been a while since the last time we saw them, right?” 

It was so odd how everyone at the same time remembered Sora, Donald and Goofy. It was almost like some outside force was responsible. Cloud didn’t have the luxury of trying to sit down and figure out who it was or what had happened. Despite being concerned that something had indeed happened to their new friends. 

“Don’t you think it’s strange how suddenly their names popped into our minds at once? Did Rinoa mention anything, since she’s a princess of heart?” asked Cloud, arm resting against his forehead. Sleep didn’t seem to be coming anytime soon, so might as well try and make some sort of conversation. Not like he was the greatest at it. Aerith and Tifa would tease him about that endless sometimes too. 

The man knew the subject of Rinoa was hard considering the two had just recently reunited, even though the circumstances of that were still a mystery to everyone else. If anyone had an answer to some of the more mystical subjects, it would be their own princess of heart. Although, lately, it seemed like Rinoa was trying ever so hard to keep herself from using any sort of magic. Cloud wonder if maybe she was scared of something...if anyone knew it would be Leon. Those two were closer than two peas in a pod, despite how often the female seemed to tease the other. At least Leon seemed a bit happier with her back. Cloud could recall the number of nights he would catch the brunet staring up at the night sky. Almost as if he was lost in memories and regret. That same look he had himself from time to time. 

Cloud hissed, reaching up to grab his forehead, as his right arm hanging over the edge of the bed seemed to glow with a dark aura. Quickly, he turned to grab it, trying to focus on anything but the dark thoughts flowing into his heart. It was unbearable to feel that tiny bit still trying so hard to consume his very soul. 

ɴᴏᴛ ᴀɢᴀɪɴ..ᴊᴜꜱᴛ ꜰᴏʀ ᴏɴᴇ ɴɪɢʜᴛ, ᴘʟᴇᴀꜱᴇ ʟᴇᴛ ᴍᴇ ʀᴇꜱᴛ.

Continued from:X with @lionfated​

#A falling star fell from your heart you were in the darkness too so I stayed beside you(Lionfated) #There's Darkness inside my Heart trying burn out my light(Cloud Strife) #Darkness and Light(Kingdom Hearts Verse) #I hope this is alright;; getting into mindset for his character slowly

[k4vehrtz]

⸻ YOU'RE A CRISIS OF MY FAITH

. ✦ . starring — dom!top! t. fushiguro / m! reader

warnings — porn with some plot, sacrilege, a copious amount of religious themes, priest! reader, virgin reader ergo loss of virginity, allusion to homophobia / internalised homophobia, unprotected sex, blowjob (r receiving), deepthroating, fingering, riding, creampie, toji lowkey has a corruption kink, use of the nickname 'angel', toji refers to the reader as father once but that is entirely in a religious sense . ✦ . wc — 2.1k . ✦ . notes — we'll all pretend that didn't just happen!! anyway!! i'm so so normal about toji...and !! i don't know what exactly falls under dark content but seeing as this contains sacrilege you've been warned nevertheless. not proof read bc t**blr stressed me out

“what does —” he stops himself mid-sentence to motion upwards, “the big man upstairs think about homosexuality?”

you swallow hard, your adam’s apple bobbing. you hadn’t expected the question, naturally. especially from the likes of toji fushiguro of all people. but you answer anyway. “well,” you murmur, averting your gaze so that you’d stare out the window as the first signs of winter begin to settle in for its extended stay instead of being forced to meet toji’s pointed gaze. “we all are subject to desires that may or may not reflect god’s light, but these desires aren’t sinful unless you act or encourage others to act on them.”

he nods almost absentmindedly in response before following up with: “…even you, i imagine, as a man of god, could fall victim to such desires?”

and you pause for a beat, your jaw tightening as an image escapes the dark recesses of your mind; the neat box you’ve forced what you deemed unpleasant thoughts into.

the man in your mind didn’t look quite like anyone you knew at first. he was just a man without a name or a face — similarly to the world before god’s divine intervention, he too was without form. but then, by chance, you met toji fushiguro and his teenage son. then the man who’d haunt your thoughts began to change.

he was older, weathered by life experiences and parenting, and taller, maybe 6’2, with messy black hair that fell over his brows. his hair reminded you of the cloudless, starless night sky. then there was that scar on the corner of his right lip. you’d imagined yourself on more than one occasion leaning toward him, pressing your lips against it before he’d open his mouth and let you explore the wet cavern.

though you shake your head as if that would dismiss your thoughts, fingers curling defensively around the window’s ledge. “everyone encounters temptation in their day-to-day, but, like god’s son, we must resist.” you counter eventually. “you’re not one for idle chatter.”

“i’m not,” he agrees, his voice smooth, something akin to the feeling of silk against your skin. it gives you goosebumps and makes the hairs stand up. he puts his hands up in mock surrender, his gaze intent. you can feel him burning holes into the back of your head. “you know, i think i’m long overdue for a confession.”

“as you wish.”

“our heavenly father has declared the following in the book of james, chapter five, verse sixteen: ‘therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. the prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective’. now, in the name of the father, and of the son, and of the holy spirit, amen.”

silence — and then toji sucks in a breath, his voice thick with an emotion you can’t quite grasp but has you shifting in your seat on the other side of the confessional booth anyway. you’re, on some level, disgusted by your behaviour. it’s unprofessional at best, or perhaps the beginning of your unravelling at worst. you fear it’s the latter.

“bless me, father, for i have sinned,” the words slide off his tongue with ease, “it has been two months since my last confession.” and your eyes flutter closed, or maybe you forced them closed because you feel no better than a pervert by the way you ache at every sound that comes out of his mouth.

either way, you don’t notice the way the door creaks as toji lets himself out of his side of the confessional booth and opens the door to yours until he’s kneeling in front of you, the pads of his fingers digging into your sides. the skin of his fingers is rough, worn out from the different tasks he takes on to keep himself and megumi afloat, you think. he’s become something of a handyman around town.

“to be honest, father,” he says, now directly addressing you. “i came here fer’ your guidance…you see, i’ve been havin’ thoughts lately that i don’t think align with what god wants.” and you find yourself at a loss, your eyes still closed, though your adam’s apple bobs again as you swallow your suppressed thoughts. “my guidance?” you repeat quietly, “confess your…thoughts…then, and seek forgiveness. it’s not a sin unless you act on those thoughts.”

he lets out a pleased hum at that, leaning forward so that his face is practically buried in your clothed crotch. “so,” he counters, “if my understanding is correct, would it be a sin if i told you to spread your legs f’me?”

you don’t trust yourself to speak right now — not when your thoughts are all muddled. so, you simply nod and toji clicks his tongue. “but sin or not, you’re going to anyway because you and i both know how we feel about each other, right? c’mon, use your big boy words and tell me.”

the smart thing—no, the right thing to do here would be to say no. adamantly deny the lingering touches and glances that the two of you had come to share. affection between two men could only go so far. but then again, you’ve gone so much farther in the safety of your bedroom long after the sun has set. how much longer could you shamelessly show your face to the other members of the church and listen to them confess their deepest secrets to you? you’re parading as a righteous man when you’re anything but.

if it turns out to be as bad of a sin as they say, god will strike you down.

turns out it’s not as bad of a sin as they say — or maybe it is and you’ve yet to receive divine punishment.

“god works in mysterious ways,” you say under your breath but toji hears it anyway. how could he not when you’re in such proximity to each other? you hadn’t meant to say it out loud but it doesn’t matter. and toji (ever the charmer) takes it upon himself to respond, “maybe he brought us together for a reason…or maybe i’m one of lucifer’s lackeys sent to seduce you.”

you make the conscious decision to ignore that which seems to entertain toji even more. he’s ridiculous in ways you can’t fathom. like…the way he’s got your legs spread, back pressed firmly against the wood of the confessional, your thighs trembling as he clicks his tongue, “spread yer’ legs a little wider f’me angel, s’not enough f’me to suck that pretty cock.”

he… he knows what he’s doing. whereas you were clumsy and inexperienced. but, to be fair, you had taken a vow of celibacy when you were twelve.

now, though, you’re experiencing true pleasure for the first time — and with a man, no less. you tilt your head back in what little space the confessional affords you as toji gives your balls tentative touches, maybe light squeezes, as he aligns the head of your leaking cock with his mouth. you’re embarrassed, warmth flooding your cheeks, but you can’t look away. not when this is all you’ve ever wanted.

there’s pre-cum on his lips; your pre-cum. it’s there, as clear as day, and he’s entirely unbothered. all of his attention is on your cock. your cock that’s throbbing as he sucks on it. pre-cum and saliva mixing. it’s all so new to you.

as for him…well isn’t this cute? you’re trying your hardest to stifle those needy moans of yours, he can tell. but no matter how much you bite down on your lower lip or how you press your hands against your mouth those pretty sounds you make always find a way of escaping. part of him, somewhere deep down, feels guilty for corrupting you like this. but perhaps he doesn’t feel guilty enough.

he continues to work on your cock, sucking on it whilst simultaneously fondling with your balls. you’re quivering, rutting your hips forward now and then. occasionally you go too far and it scares you at first — you didn’t mean to push your cock all the way to the back of his throat! ever the unbothered, though, he welcomes it until you’re spurting your load down his throat. and he swallows, utterly content.

then he coos at you, bringing a thumb up to your face, and tracing the outline of your jaw. “don’t worry about me, angel, you’re not going to hurt me. what you’re going to do f’me is let me reposition us so i can see your pretty boy hole, m’kay? my boy can do that f’me, right?”

my boy. the idea of being his. after so long…it only feels right. so, you allow him to readjust your position so that you’re straddling his lap and somewhere in the process you both disregard your clothes.

“you’ve been thinking about my cock? that’s why yer’ hole is winking f’me? all ready to take my cock like a big boy?” he asks and you nod your head eagerly. every word that comes out of his mouth is dirty but your reactions are the icing on the cake. you’re not the quiet, unassuming priest he met by chance all those months back. and to think that he’s the reason why.

well, he doesn’t linger on the thought. you’re impatient, squirming on his thighs in search of friction. but he’d be lying if he said it didn’t get him going and he may be many things but he would not force himself into you without properly preparing you to take him.

so as much as you whine about it, he ultimately takes his time with you. the nearest lubricant happened to be some sort of oil, but he made sure that it was safe to use before coating his fingers in a generous amount. then he oh so carefully drags his finger across your hole. it makes you shudder, but after a few minutes of this, you find yourself unprepared for the stretch of fitting a singular digit in. it hurts and the moment you so much as whimper toji’s pressing his lips against yours. the same lips that were around your cock only moments ago. his lips are gentle, soothing, even.

and he keeps it like that — his lips against yours as he slowly introduces more fingers into your ass. it takes a while but your pained whimpers soon morph into more desperate, filthy little noises as he drags his fingers in and out of your hole before curling them, tips grazing your prostate.

you want it, you decide. his cock, that is. you want his cock in your ass beyond a reasonable doubt. it’s all you need. bouncing on his fingers feels good but you just know that his cock would feel so much better.

“this is a sin, we’re both sinning,” you announce, your words strong but your delivery coming in between laboured gasps as his fingers continue to graze your prostate. “so i expect you to fuck me like you mean it.”

and he doesn’t need to be told twice. with a scoff — one that sounds more amused than annoyed — he pulls his fingers out of you. shaking his head as you whimper at the loss. but it’s soon replaced by something bigger and much thicker. it’s his cock, covered in the same oil, and you almost can’t believe it when he’s aligning it with your entrance, pushing past the tight ring of muscle.

you have to take a few breaks before you fully sink on him with a low groan. he makes you feel so full and he hasn’t even moved yet. and when you take it upon yourself to ride him you revert to the softheaded boy he makes you out to be.

your movements are clumsy — mediocre, you’re sure of it. but toji doesn’t intervene. he simply leans back, big, warm hands on your hips, while you figure out your rhythm. and after a few failed attempts you find one that works for both of you. it feels good, it feels great even. his hard cock filling you to the brim while you all but mindlessly bounce on his cock, your walls clenching around his throbbing length.

you’re going to cum soon, you’re sure of it. and when you do eventually watch through teary eyes as your cock spurts ropes of cum onto his stomach you’re not surprised whatsoever. toji, however, takes a lot longer to cum. you’ve probably cum at least two more times by the time toji takes control, his grip on your hips tightening as he angles you just the right way to hit your prostate with each thrust of his hips upwards. your toes curl, eyes half-lidded, and you just barely acknowledge the warmth of his semen in your ass.

all you can think of, and just barely manage to stutter out is: “you’ve fucked me,” and he stares up at you with a smug smile, chest heaving as he copes with his orgasm that has been a long time coming, “yeah, i’ve fucked yer’ pretty boy hole.”

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