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delicateporcelaindoll · 2 months

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bandersnatchers · 8 months

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I think something that always makes me cry about Astarion is just his learning what he can be like when he actually has safety and a support system. (Warning: the admittedly overly long essay has some spoilers)

Like sure in his initial dealings with you, it might look like he disapproves of good deeds if you're not choosing sassy answers.

But the man's been mentally/sexually/physically abused for 200 years and he straight up believes people can't genuinely care. All he has is his survival instinct and the knowledge of what hell is like. You beat a dog enough and all it knows is violent anger, and you meet him after he has just been given a slice of freedom from those centuries of beatings. He's terrified it's going to be taken away from him. Of course hes not going to be wanting to do things that could risk this freedom. Of course he's going to fall back on the only way he knows to barely survive - manipulation and cruelty.

But as the story goes on, if you show him you actually care, that you're genuinely nice, he learns he actually has safety with your character, stability even. This doesn't even have to be romantic, like the scene where you just back him up and say "Astarion is his own person, he makes his own choices" is a literal shock to his system. He has not had simple autonomy in over 200 years, I can't even imagine what that does to your mindset. And if you do go down the romantic route and you're actually accepting of him wanting to slow down and that you still genuinely care about him... He learns that as a survivor he's still worth love even if he doesn't provide sexual gratification. That his companionship is all you need - that he's worth it. That he's more than it.

There was definitely hints of him caring before. I mean I was sitting at high approval with him for a while, and you can definitely see through his sassiness that he is starting to care about the party. After this though, he just genuinely sees your character as someone he can depend on, and he starts approving of good actions ie) giving food to kids, letting yenna stay with you. And he approves because he's not as terrified anymore. He's not frantically clutching at resources or power or safety, because for the first time, with these companions, he doesn't need to. For the first time he sees that people can be genuinely caring and that's okay and good. He sees that maybe even he can be genuinely caring. The bond with the group grows SO much, and he finally has people he can rely on and that rely on him.

And when you get to act 2/3 (depending on where you separate the acts) and you learn what Cazador wants, you see him start to get mean and defensive again and it's because he's terrified he's going to lose everything he just recently grasped. His instinct is to power grab - what he mainly knows is that power means people can't hurt you - means you can hurt them instead. He's up against his abuser of 200 years and while yea, the group is strong and by this point you've likely done some incredible feats, 200 years of abuse makes Cazador the most terrifying monster to him. Furthermore, as you progress towards Cazador, Astarion has to witness what 200 years of his slavery has done to others, has to look them in the eye when he didn't even know they were still alive. He has to contend with what he was forced to do, what this means for others, what this means for him.

Astarion is then given such a potential boon - he can make it all go away. He can make the 7000 spawn go away. He can make Cazador go away. He can make the last 200 years go away. He can be free in the sun. He can make it so no one can ever hurt him again, forever. All he has to do is follow through with what most of his life has taught him - that cruelty and power are the only things that matter. All he has to do is kill 7000 victims (and oh how easily he can spin this to be a good thing), and all he has to do is kill his damned master (this is a good thing I will admit).

But this isn't that story. This is a story about a survivor that finally had the support and love to learn that he is more than what was done to him, and what he was forced to do. This is a story about a person who looks at exactly what terrifies him the most, and decides I will break this cycle of abuse, I will look it dead on, while with my friends, my new family, and I will stop it. This is a story about a person who learns that yes, certainly, there are cruel things in this world, horrors that haunt you, but this is a world full of love and care and he can help it. He can love and care for it, or in the very least start with his companions.

I haven't progressed much past this part yet, but thinking about it always makes me tear up. I know the story going forward could have some devastating twists, but right now I'm just excited to see what Astarion is like with this chapter over. Im very thankful Larian gave us this story of survivorship and love.

#astarion #astarion spoilers #bg3 #bg3 spoilers #mywords

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rumor-imbris · 14 days

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There is no sky, no storm like You and no fiercer wish of mine to run under your rainfall

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iamagentcoop · 7 months

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*sneaks back in* Almost exactly 3 years after it started posting, I finished Oakland? So for anyone out there interested, if you want to read in its entirety, IT IS NOW AVAILABLE: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26446165/chapters/64435024…

(Also, enjoy the original graphic I made for it. Design is my passion.)

#aftg #neil josten #andrew minyard #all for the game #mywords

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abitbrokenpoetry · 7 months

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there will be disappointments. That’s the nature of life. There will be cruelty. And days the darkness will feel like it’s suffocating you. There will be relationships lost, lovers, friends. And there will be loneliness. And nights when it feels like the world ends. but there will also be mornings. moments that make your eyes shimmer with tears of hope. And there will be those that stay(maybe forever). There will be tiny droplets of light to find even on the darkest of days(if you look for it). And every night the world ends, you can open your eyes and make a new one the next morning (if you want to).

#poetry #poet #writerscreed #mypoetry #writer #mywords #female writers #poetrylovers #femalepoet #inspirational #quotes #inspirational quotes #inspirational words #use the poeticstories tag to get your work seen here #spilled ink #poetic thoughts #deep thoughts

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smblmn · 4 months

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My fic for the New Traditions: a Red White & Royal Blue Advent calendar event from @rwrbprompts:

Flirting for Dummies

In the time it takes for him to collect his things to go, June and Nora have dissolved into a fit of giggles and are offering more useless advice. Alex leaves June’s apartment with Nora’s voice saying “you still have a month, give him a chance,” ringing in his ears and more laughter accompanying her suggestion. Give Henry a chance? what is it that they don’t understand about the fact that Henry doesn’t like Alex and he won’t talk to him?

#red white and royal blue #rwrb #red white and royal blue fanfic #rwrb fanfic #rwrb fic #firstprince #firstprince fic #mywords

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myfashionburden · 1 year

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It is that special time of year

Hi y'all.

Sorry for not posting that frequent lately. I had a burnout from my job, but vacation soon! ♡

It is that special time of year, where I love diving in the fashion worlds of Heaven Gaia and Paolo Sebastian, for some reason they give me winter vibes, I hope you still will follow along. Below one of my favorite gifs from 2020.

Happy December! xoxo

#heaven gaia #paolo sebastian #fashion #style #runway #gifs #glittery #fashion edit #coutureedit #fashiongifs #mywords #imback #myfashionburden

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lipglossfantasy · 3 months

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I hope your go to person knows how lucky they are..❤️

#mywords #coffee shop thoughts

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submissiveinclination · 2 years

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In all that i am, and ever will be, it is the moon that has set me free.

~sleepy smile~

#goodnight moon #justthisgirl #justmywords #mywords #submissiveinclination

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darkzonez · 5 months

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Seeing you through the clouds

Your light breaks the darkness and calls to me

So far yet so close

Can I touch you just once?

@darkzonez

#myphoto #mywords #mythoughts

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rumor-imbris · 3 months

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Half man, half winter midnight half warrior, half vernal sun Who could have known my heart would freeze and burn inside all of him, a volcano with a snow-capped peak

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mindstack · 6 months

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shadows are a comfort

to those burned by the sun's arrogance

#love #shadows #lgbtq+#dark academia #dark acadamia aesthetic #truth #slytherin #ireland #dublin #moon #classical piano #mlm #gay #gay men #mywords #photography

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delicateporcelaindoll · 2 months

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The urge to change my entire appearance and identity has been bubbling up inside of me. I feel a significant change in self on the horizon.

#mine #mywords #girlblog #girlblogger #girlblogging #bpd

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abitbrokenpoetry · 4 months

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I had declared war on myself.. Bloody battles raging for years.. I sat in the middle of the killing fields.. savage; dirty weapons in hand.. victims lying around me.. but deep down I was broken.. people would come& they would go.. & I barely noticed them.. until you came wondering in my path.. you crawled through the landmines.. & dodged my grenades.. & you patiently sat with me as things exploded.. you were fighting your own battles.. you gave me your coat.. and wiped away my tears for awhile.. & it wasn’t nearly so lonely there anymore.. I never thanked you for that.. for keeping my company.. when I was trying so desperately to destroy myself.. I hope wherever you are now.. you have fought all your battles.. & won your war.

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smblmn · 4 months

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✨Tú, mi deseo pendiente✨

A sense of peace overcomes Alex. A sense of peace that he can only associate with Henry. And so, the words are out of his mouth before he can’t think to stop them. “Marry me.”

My gift for the @rwrbnygiftexchange goes to @bitbybitwrites. I hope you have an amazing New Year and that you like your fic, I loved writing it ❤️

#rwrb24 #red white and royal blue #red white and royal blue fic #rwrb #rwrb fic #firstprince #mywords #rwrb fanfic #rwrb fanfiction #alex claremont diaz #henry fox mountchristen windsor

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spoiledswitch · 1 year

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Just had this thought of playing on my phone when you grab my ass and slip a hand up my skirt.

"damn, no hello?" you don't say anything in response, just slide my panties down and start fingering my cunt.

"You can't do what you want, just don't distract me" i mumble, and you add another finger.

"I'm already gonna do whatever I want" you laugh and pick up the pace. I switch apps but still haven't turned to face you yet. The firm grip of one hand on my hip tugs my ass closer to you, and I realize you've simply been stretching me for that new strap we bought last night

"mmm, I thought were gonna use that one on our anniversary" my pussy is suddenly 3 fingers lighter

"i couldn't wait til then" I feel the cool lubed tip run up and down my slit and can't help but suck a breath in. Just focus on the article, I tell myself. you start off with a fairly rough pace, and the squelch of my cunt starts to fill my ears. It gets harder and harder to focus on the words

"focus, focus" I mutter, but you manage to hear it anyways

"focus on me fucking you dumb, right?" You pick up the pace, the sound of skin slapping skin gets louder, the grip you have on my hips tighter, and manage to hit my gspot midsentence: "quiet, I need to finish- oh fuck yes, right there" I pant out, phone slipping from my hands "that's what I thought, bitch"

#mywords #bellabottoms #lesbian #my writing #wlw smut #wlw reader #men dni #ngl reader can be masc or femme as long as you can top the shit out of me

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