#spn 15x20 coda

[kirathehyrulian]

🖤🩸STEVANA PAIN EVENT🩸🖤| Day 6

↳ Sam and Loss of a Loved One♥♥♥

(Please do not edit/alter. Feel free to reblog, but please do not repost. At the very least please give me credit.)

@folsomprisonblues @trials-era-sam​

For more art from me please check out my “myart” tag here on Tumblr. Or my  “AO3“.

👇(Art Notes below the cut)👇

Art Notes:

It’s so completely late, but after I missed the deadline I just decided to take the time to clean it up and make it all finished looking for this one at least. It also helped that that the mods of the event didn’t seem to mind late entries. Hopefully that hasn’t changed after 11 days.🤞

I would have been done with this short comic earlier, but tbh it was hard for me to work on it because the subject was affecting me so much. I can torture Sam in a lot of bloody ways but I can’t handle the emotional angst as much lately.

Like the last few times I’d rather go into detail on Ao3 when I make that post. But, long story short, I couldn’t figure out what I wanted to do for this theme until way too late. And then I remembered 2x04 where Sam buried John’s tags at Mary’s headstone, and then I figured maybe Sam might do the same with the Samulet.

And in 11x23, Dean said that he wanted his ashes buried at this grave site. But instead of his ashes, I thought the Samulet was more poetic and fit the theme that this was a family grave with no remains in it. It just has Mary’s headstone, John’s tags, and now the samulet. And, the samulet could be a representation of both Sam and Dean and thus the family is symbolically finally together again. Idk, it depends on how people want to take it.

The dialogue was a parallel to when Sam said “I love you, Mom” at Mary’s headstone in 2x04 after he buried his Dad’s tags and I like to think of it as a sort of reply to Dean saying he loved Sam in 15x20′s barn scene.

Anyways,

Enjoy, if you can!♥♥♥

#stevanaweek #15x20 coda #sam winchester appreciation #dead!dean #gencest #or #wincest #idc #spn angst #samulet #sad!sam #myart

[angelsdean]

not only did jensen produce his first fanfic but said fanfic is both a prequel and a sequel AND a 15x20 coda / time gap fic AND canon-divergent AND simultaneously set in a completely separate AU. it's also a crossover fic between two shows. and could be a one-shot but has series potential. boy's got so many ao3 tags

#literally i stopped using my spn prequel tag the day the finale aired bc it's actually more of a sequel / coda ?? #and it's been blowing my mind. like yes we knew dean's parts were set post-15x20 #but he was mostly voiceover / meta narrative until the spnwin s1 finale where it was like. oh oh ok yea he's actively in this story #dean's progressing HIS own story too. and when we got confirmation that this all takes place during the heaven drive it's like !!!!! #this is literally a fanfic gap. literally a time gap fic #and i love it so much #vic.txt #spnwin

[ipromiseimawriter]

WIP TITLE GAME

RULES: post the names of all the files in your WIP folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. Let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them, and then post a little snippet or tell them something about it! and then tag as many people as you have WIPs.

Tagged by @zahnie - thank you omg!!

From most recently worked on to least (roughly): (I tend to be pretty literal with these for the most part, if they don't already have a title)

destiel fix it fic - draft 2: is what it says on the tin. I will get to chipping at the end of this godforsaken series, so hELP ME. I do have a fancy lil summary though (this could get edited later but y'know!!):

“What are you doing? Dean, no–!” “You asked me to stop you. So I’m stopping you.” ( As promised, the Empty came for Castiel when his soul called. When it sang a happiness so profound that nothing else could possibly contain it. But Dean wasn’t ready to let go – and if you were to ask him, he’d swear he had failed Cas one too many times. So when the time came, he sank right down with him. )  Chuck could’ve called it, really. But there’s no biblical preparation for their journey through the Empty. It’s all up to them, now, while Sam and Jack (and friends) race to undo Chuck’s damage to the world. Alternating POV. 15x18 CODA/Fix-It Fic for end of 15x18/15x19 & beyond [15x20 who is she lmao]

destiel theatre bitches AU: an incredibly self-indulgent AU where Dean and Castiel are professors for a theatre department at a (made-up) small liberal arts school somewhere in Kansas. Cas is a new arrival to the department who's making waves (and suggesting some batshit shows for production), Dean's the gruff and well-loved scene shop head/tech professor who doesn't like his toes getting stepped on (jk yes he does), and they're gonna be soooo normal about it (me when i lie). nearly everyone and their mom is in this AU. we have fun here

Welcome to Purgatory: an original work (longform)! a story inspired by my time interacting with SPN/with other horror-fantasy adjacent medias, some characters I've had for 1000 years, and just - fucking around and finding out. I def tried to NaNoWriMo it before, to no such luck, so I just chip at it on my own time. I've got a running tag for it if you're ever interested! (old summary)

Jules Herrick went missing without a trace in the early nineties, and his hunting partner, Simon Villanova, never saw him again. We jump ahead about twenty-five years and realize why he should’ve stayed missing. Victor and Amelia are two childhood friends separated by time and responsibility, reuniting for what should be a normal road trip under less fortunate circumstances - the death of a mutual friend. However, the trip is quickly derailed by a strange pursuer that sends them on the run, and into action.  The people who catch up with them to help are not what they expect. The lives their families have led were kept from the two for safety. But between a rogue demon, its lost hellhound, and a secret organization hunting down the missing man and his cohorts, one question must be asked: What does Jules Herrick want with the end of the world, as they know it?

go catch a sunset (stanford-era dean/the outsiders bullshit): a Stanford-era Dean fic (which has 2 chapters up!) that I sort of use as my lil swimming pool for figuring ideas out? Mostly just speculation and big character thoughts on that very vulnerable time. I'm v much looking forward to introducing both Bobby and Cassie soon, getting some Winchester drama, and picking at those good backstory characters.

mama barracuda (WIP title - eldritch horror type shit): an original work (short story). "There's a monster in the woods, just off the beaten path from Hope's home. She isn't the first to be trapped into position of Keeper for the Barracuda of the Backwoods, but she is the first - in a very long time - to truly understand her. They call her Mama." So essentially - monster collects teeth for her own rotting mouth. Sisyphean effort on the Keeper's part. Symbiotic parasite/mother-daughter type shit. LOTS TO UNPACK.

honorable mention: a bunch of plays and other lil bits that would take me too long to describe <333

tagging: @subtlefires, @disabled-dean , @butchabouttown, @luckshiptoshore , and anyone who wants to play! (this includes all my friends who may see this and go "hey i have wips". give it to me. i want to see it)

#tag game #writing stuff #original work #fanfic #elliot rambles #tagged: zahnie #supernatural #welcome to purgatory

[sinnabonka]

If you wish hard enough

Dean’s never been one to expect gifts from anyone, let alone God himself, but today he's gotten the best gift he could ever wish for, on AO3

Dean wakes up to a gentle caress on his cheek. It feels nothing like Miracle's wet slimy wake up call that's become a part of his daily morning routine, and he jolts, hands scavenging the sheets for his gun.

The emptiness under the pillow makes Dean’s guts flip, but his mind keeps searching for options. He remembers there’s a pen knife hidden in his boot under the bed, a demon blade in the jacket hanging on the doorknob, plus, there is always a lamp on the nightstand he could effectively fling.

Instead, running the numbers, he decides first to shed some light onto the scene, and paws his way to the switch and flips it.

He winces when the white dim light floods the room.

As his eyes refocus, he blinks, mouth falling open. Swallowing, his throat clenches around the fragment of a sound ready to escape. His fists ball on the comforter on both sides of his thighs as his stomach careens into the endless and weightless feeling of falling.

The light is weak, the outlines it draws are smudged and blurry.

“Hello, Dean.”

The room floor tilts like a ship deck in a storm, and Dean finds himself grasping on solid surfaces of the furniture in a rushed attempt to get out of the bed. His lungs ache at the lack of air to fill them up.

Dean makes one unsure step, then another. His knees buckle, but with the last ounce of strength he forces himself to stay upright.

He reaches out to what has to be a ghost, because what else can it be, and as he does, his fingers are trembling. A hopeful thought struggles, drowning in the white noise inside his skull.

And then there’s a touch.

“Cas.”

Dean chokes on the word, the one he kept whispering in the middle of the night for the last few months trying to speak it into existence. The name he was too broken and hurt to say out loud knowing the sound of it would defeat him if he did. The name he was sure he was never meant to say again looking into those familiar blue eyes, now staring back at him, expecting.

“Cas,” he repeats, finally finding the solid ground. His voice is low and trembling, but unlike all the times he’s been sobbing it half asleep, his voice is not hollow anymore. It may be a bit too emotional than Dean cares to admit.

“Hello,” the ghost repeats with an unsure smile.

“Hey,” Dean says back.

It’s just a moment before an unknown force pushes him forward. His hands fly, touching, grasping, pulling in. Dean abruptly exhales as the air gets punched out of him in a single moment when their chests collapse against each other.

“Cas,” he whispers, burying his face into the crack of Cas’ neck.

The wrinkled fabric of the trench coat under his palm feels real, so does the warm, soft skin under the pressure of his cheek and the hand slipping up to rest across his back in comforting circles.

Please be real. He squeezes his eyes shut and allows a single loud sob escape his lungs.

“I’m here,” says Cas, but Dean is not sure if he hears it or feels the vibration of the voice, pressing too hard to the source of it. “I’m right here, Dean. It’s alright now.”

“I didn’t think I’d see you again. I thought the Empty…”

“Some things are beyond their control,” Cas says with a smile, before pulling away.

“But why?” Dean shakes his head at the way the question sounds and asks instead: "How?”

“Jack says hi,” Cas smiles knowingly.

It’s a short moment of silence between them, a moment of long-awaited comfort and relief, and Dean’s afraid to spoil it with words. He leans in closer and lets both his hands rest on Cas’ shoulders. He catches himself thinking that if he lets go, looks away or blinks too slowly, Cas is going to disappear, dissolve into nothingness, leaving him alone in the dim light of the bedroom.

He slowly shakes his head, staring into Cas’ eyes, as if gathering the fuel for his own bravery. He clears his throat before speaking up.

“I need to say something,” he starts, each word weighed and measured. “Last time you bailed on me and didn’t give me a chance to, so now I’m gonna jump straight to the...”

“Dean, I…”

“Goddammit, Cas, let me finish. I’m not the talking kind, you know that. This one is long due.” He clears his throat again, though it’s nothing physical he can simply cough out. Dean tries again: “I need to say it, okay? I never thought I’d get a chance, I’m still not sure I’m not daydreaming over a book or something.”

Cas looks as if he was about to interrupt him again, but never does.

“I promised myself that if I ever see you again, it would be the first thing I say, okay? No maybe laters, no tomorrows, just here, now, a’right? Last time it took Thee Death literally knocking at the door for one of us to speak up.” Dean smiles nervously. “That’s not happening again.”

Cas’ eyebrows raise, but he stays respectfully silent.

“I’m not losing you again, you hear me? So you gotta cut this self-devotion-take-me-instead crap. From now on, none of that. Clear?”

Cas nods, not sure if he still is not allowed to speak.

“Good,” Dean says with a dead serious expression etched across his face.

His heart is loud inside his chest, the even thuds echoing through his temples. He can’t think of what he’s doing even for a split second or he’ll find a thousand and one excuses not to. And he can’t afford it, not this time. His hand lands on the back of Cas’ neck and he inches closer, suddenly short of breath.

“Dean...”

“Shut up,” he huffs, freezing for a moment with his eyes glued to Cas’ mouth. He licks his own lips, he curses silently, and comes the rest of the way in one movement.

When their lips meet, Dean shakily exhales and sinks into the kiss.

“I love you,” he whispers against Cas’ mouth, as if just hearing it was not enough, as if Cas had to taste the sincerity of those words to believe them.

“I love you,” he repeats into the kiss, and he misses the moment when Cas’ hands wrap around him and press them together firmly.

“I love you, dumbass,” he smirks, “and I am not losing you again. You hear me?”

“Of course,” Cas answers.

It takes them another few minutes before they break away. Breathless, blushed, they look at each other with unmistakable fondness.

“What time is it?” Cas asks suddenly.

Dean looks over his shoulder on the clock, but for a moment can’t make out the numbers jumping under his blurry vision.

“Ten past midnight,” he says finally, and follows with, “Why? Gotta be home before you turn into a pumpkin?”

“Happy birthday, Dean,” Cas says, instead of reflecting on the joke, and plants another quick kiss on Dean’s lips. “Jack asked to wish you a happy birthday, too, and to remind you that if you wish hard enough for something, it’s sure to come true. I guess it was him…”

“Yeah,” Dean interrupts, his face warming up, “Yeah, I know what that's about.”

He rests his forehead against Cas’, eyes squeezed shut, and thinks of how it took him forty two years to finally take his first full breath.

He's never been one to expect gifts from anyone, let alone God himself, but today he's gotten the best gift he could ever wish for.

“I love you too,” Cas whispers, and Dean’s heart sings to it.

He smiles at the thought of how later today, when he will be blowing out candles on his birthday cake, he will have nothing left to wish for.

#happy birthday Dean Winchester #destiel #spncreatorsdaily #destiel fanfic #destiel drabble #hbd dean #destiel ficlet #destiel fluff #dean winchester #deancas fic #spn fic #deancas #spn #castiel #spn 15x20 coda #sinnabonka writes

[finaledenialist]

@samwinchestersleftshoe, @theselfhatingangelofthursday, @theangelwiththewormstache; ugh you seemed interested in the idea so... tagging you. 

This is the one fix-it where Dean isn’t actually in Heaven, y’all. 

Something was off.

Dean kept driving and driving and he felt like he was drunk. Drugged. His head was clouded and he felt... Unconscious. Something. Was. Wrong.

He stopped the car and went outside. It was quiet. Too quiet.

What was even this place? How did he got here? The barn, vampires, pain, Sam was crying. Right, he was dead. But... Something about this place. Something just wasn't right.

There was the Roadhouse. And Bobby. Okay, but... He was in heaven before. There was Ash in the Roadhouse. And Ellen and Jo should be there, too. So... Why no one was there? This place felt...

Empty.

Just empty. Too empty. There he was, he, and the impala, and the road and some forest. Basically the middle of nowhere. And Bobby. But Bobby was in his very own heaven, he knew that. So... What the hell?

Something was clearly wrong and he started to get more and more nervous and suspicious and this only assured him he wasn't in heaven. He had to admit to himself he was getting scared and if he was sure of one thing - this wasn't how heaven was supposed to feel like.

Think. Think.

Okay. According to the old rules he wasn't supposed to get to heaven at all, but Jack was the new boss, so maybe that rule has changed. And this clearly wasn't hell. And no, this was not purgatory either. But if it was heaven... Why it was so... Empty? How long was he driving anyway? How far did he get? The road seemed endless and... Pointless. Where was he even going?

Something just didn't add up. Axis Mundi, that's what it was called, he remembered. The road. But that road lead to his good memories, to the people he loved, and this one? This one seemed to go on and on forever, with no one and nothing in sight. Just the trees on both sides of the road. On and on. He was alone. Where was everyone?

After a few minutes he decided to keep driving. He felt he was too far gone to go back to the roadhouse and was willing to give this place one more shot. He drove for what seemed another forever and he was just about to stop when he saw it. Something's changed. The road was taking a huge turn and he saw it. At first only a glimpse, between the trees. It was a lake. And then the mountains on the other side of it.

And he recognized it immediately. And he was terrified. Something was deeply, deeply wrong, he could feel it but not quite name. He stopped the car and looked at the scenery in front of him. It was haunting him in his nightmares, until it was replaced by another one.

This was the place where Cas died 3 years ago, right after Jack was born. Maybe this was hell after all.

And suddenly the memory hit him. Running back from the apocalypse world, to the portal, faster and faster, and then they were back, and he turned around and Cas was just standing there; and then there was light everywhere and Cas was no longer standing, he was lying in the mud and Lucifer was smiling; and then Dean was carrying Cas' body to the house and after locking himself up with Cas he cried, cried, cried and cried for so long he didn't notice when night turned into day and he had no strength left in him to do anything. He felt dead inside. He heard Sam's voice from the distance but he didn't care at first or at all. After forever passed and he managed to somehow numb his whole being with every ounce of alcohol he found in the house; he stood up, looked at Cas, gently caressed his face and he knew he shouldn't be doing this, he knew, salt and burn, salt and burn, but he couldn't. He reached for Cas' tie and he carefully took it off. He stared at Cas' face as he hid the tie in his inside pocket. Bowing down and pressing a kiss to Cas' forehead felt way too natural.

Dean blinked. What on earth was going on? This was clearly one of the worst moments of his life. So why was he reliving it?

Because you couldn't save him and it was your fault, something whispered.

'No', Dean mouthed, but the the memory hit him again. And again. And again. He was completely confused and shaking; he wanted to run but he couldn't really move it was like... It kind of felt like a dream. Like a nightmare you thought you woke up from but it turned out to be a dream within a dream and... And suddenly the scenery changed.

They were in the bunker. It was night, Sam and Jack were already asleep but he and Cas stayed in the kitchen, talking, about god knows what. Dean's focus was purely on wrinkles on Cas' nose while he was smiling and laughing at some dumb stuff he just said. The beer kept flowing, and he was so happy. He knew, right there. After all this time he finally knew. The 'I love you, Cas' almost escaped his mouth a couple of times that evening, but he butchered it in his throat every time. Cas was an angel after all, and he was just a human. He tried to focus on the moment and be happy but the regret came in waves. It was so simple, Dean. And the moment was perfect. Not only this moment, the whisper was here again.

The wave of memories hit him without a warning. He and Cas in a car. Multiple times. He and Cas in the bunker's kitchen. Countless evenings. Countless possibilities.

And then there was Cas saying 'Because the one thing I want... Is the one thing I know I can't have'. A knife into his heart would've hurt less.

'You can't stay Cas', he heard himself saying, and there was Cas, newly human, sitting there, just back from the dead, and all the hope was fading from his eyes when the realization of Dean's words got to him. Dean was heartbroken, but Sam... He had to, he had no other choice, he kept telling himself, but he knew it wasn't true, it was making the easy choice, for once, and the cost was Castiel.

Well, at least now he was sure it was not heaven. He felt cold and scared and he didn't know what other memory is he going to relive next but then he heard it.

'Dean?'

This was coming from the Outside.

'Dean?! DEAN!'

And all of a sudden it was darkness. And then it was like someone turned on the night lamp. Warm, soft light was surrounding him. He was laying on... Well it wasn't ground. It was nothing. He blinked a couple of times.

'Dean what are you doing here?', he couldn't believe it, but it was Cas, hand on his shoulder, waking him up from all these nightmare memories he just relieved over and over again.

'What... What is going on', Dean managed to say, confused. There was just... Darkness. No, not darkness, he knew darkness. It was nothingness. And yet it was loud. 'Where... Where are we?', he asked, trying to stand up.

'Dean, this is the Empty', Castiel explained, 'and you really shouldn't be here'. He looked scared.

'The Empty?', Dean felt barely conscious, 'But how? Cas... Cas, I-'

'You shouldn't be here', Cas said again and looked around nervously, and suddenly the nothingness around them started shaking. It felt like and earthquake, but well, there was no earth. But there was a scream. Very long and high-pitched. And in the corner of his eye Dean caught a glimpse of... Something. He recognized it immediately, this was the black thing that took Cas, right after... Right After.

'Wait.', he said, 'Isn't this place exclusive for angels and demons?', he managed to form a coherent thought.

'Yes',  familiar voice spoke. Dean turned around to see no one other than Meg, standing right in front of him. He opened his mouth to say something but she was faster 'It was. It is. Seems like your boy Jack screwed up some rules. Omnipotent', she chuckled, 'but still confused, I see'.

'It seems', she continued, 'That you, Dean Winchester, died too many times and were too many things in your life to fit a certain label', she laughed, 'And you ended up here'.

Dean was confused. But Cas was standing right beside him and that was all that mattered.

'You know what, actually', she said, 'How about we make a deal.'

'No deals', Cas stepped forward, 'We are done.'

'Since your Jack exploded here, everything is like on fire', The Empty continued, unbothered, 'But the true beginning of my problems was always you, Clarence', she smiled, 'I just want to sleep. At this point I don't care about anything else. I thought I could make it. But with both of you here? No. Not a chance. I am too old to believe that.'

Dean and Cas looked at each other.

'So what then?’, Cas squinted his eyes.

‘I want both of you out of here. And I want you to do me a god damn favour and not die for the next 50 years so I can put everyone back to sleep.’ 

‘This doesn’t sound like a deal’, Dean started, ‘This sounds like a damn gift and those aren’t free in my experience’.

‘If one of you dies and comes here I am just going to release everyone out of here. And I mean everyone. Every demon you killed. Every angel you killed. And they are going to be pissed. Jack made it loud, almost everyone is awake. I want to put them to sleep. But you two troublemakers’, she smiles, ‘Get out of here. I can’t deal with both of you and everyone else at the same time’.

‘You’re just going to yeet us out of here? Back to earth?’, if someone asked Dean what was happening he wouldn’t be able to give an answer. 

‘Yeah. There is a catch though.’

‘Knew it.’, Cas rolled his eyes. 

‘Your grace, Castiel. You’re going back as a human this time’.

Dean looked at Cas, not knowing what to say. Cas looked suspicious.

‘What do you need my grace for?’, he finally asked.

‘Well it made all the angels fall from heaven once, right? I think I can use it to put them back to sleep’, The Empty shrugged, ‘You can give it away or I can take it away from you, the choice is yours.’

#this is how human!cas destiel endgame can still win #this is not even a fic more like an idea for a fic for a much more talented writer i am just putting my thoughts out there #hdsghsjgf #my writing #destiel coda #destiel ficlet #spn 15x20 coda #spn 15x20 #spn s15

[angeltiddies]

eternal skyline of a spotless mind- or the one where the first 5 or so minutes of 15x20 are the only minutes i accept. 

in which i ramble a whole ficlet on accident and y’all i need the full fic. yes there’s a tinnnny bit of smut. also spn 15x20 spoilers slightly 

now i want the fic where dean applies to be a mechanic, gets the job, does real good. he and miracle live in the bunker, sam and eileen moved out a year ago now to follow a job opportunity for eileen. it’s a big place to be alone in. he keeps watching over and over all of the movies he has in a file entitled ‘cas’ favourites’ he sips whiskey, a responsible amount, and pets miracles head while his head is on his lap. sometimes he dives into the lore, he’s glad sam isnt here to give him shit about finally doing his research, but he’s trying to find a way to cas. to save him. and one day he tries to mix up a spell thatll open a portal into the dark nothing and his ingredients sputter and spark and he thinks it’s gonna work this is it, and it just doesnt. the smoke clears, the sparks stop popping, and there’s nothing. and so that night he goes into the dungeon draped in one of cas’ old trenchcoats and he sits in that spot he had to sit years ago and he cries, and miracle sits beside him and he cries because he’s trying he’s trying to live for love he’s trying to do right by cas and he just....he cant...cas died thinking dean didnt...didnt love him. and god, does dean love him. so he cries and he whispers iloveyouiloveyouiloveyou and he falls asleep on the concrete, uses miracle as a pillow but dean doesnt think he minds. and he wakes up in the morning, eyes puffy, and he drags himself to work, and he’s back to square one. and this continues for a while, dean doesnt really remember when he tried the spell, but it’s been a while. a month, maybe more. and he goes into work, and there’s a new car for him to work on. it’s old, a classic, but dean kinda thinks she’s more junk than classic, sue him, and he starts working on it, and he opens the trunk to pop a particularly stubborn dent out of it, the client’s not paying for that but he just can’t let the car be driven around all beat up, and there, right in the trunk, is a trenchcoat. bundled up, and tan and big and dean grabs it, he shouldnt but he does and his heart is beating so fast as he brings it to his nose and smells it and it’s cas it has to be and so he rushes to the front office, demands to know who the client is, when are they coming by and as he’s going completely wild wanting to know everything it suddenly goes calm. because there, in a worn flannel and blue jeans, is cas. castiel. and dean just looks for a moment, to convince himself its real, and then hes rushing to a wide eyed cas and saying ‘you stupid son of a bitch’ and crashing his lips into those ones which he has wanted for and then cas isnt really kissing back so dean stops because he...he cant take anything more from cas, he needs to give and he...he stops himself because what if...what if this wasn’t what cas wanted, so he pulls back, lets his hands linger on the soft of the flannel, and then cas is speaking, head quirked, ‘do i...do i know you?’ and fuck. his heart drops right out of his ass. his knees buckles and hes on his way down when castiel catches him, pulls him up, hand on his shoulder, and he holds on to him. and dean lets out a ‘you don’t remember?’ and castiel says, ‘no. i...i dont i’m so sorry.’ and dean thinks all hope is lost until cas asks, ‘i know this is too much to ask but it...appears i know you, and i kind of just, woke up one day in a field and i...i dont really have anywhere to go..and um’ and hes rambling but he’s determined to get his little angel back, all the way back, so he says, ‘you wanna come home with me, angel?’ and cas grins and dean wants to see that grin everyday of his life. so he finishes cas’ car, lets him trail behind as they drive to the bunker. he doesn’t explain it really, just opens the door and says ‘well, heres the place’ and cas walks in and looks at everything with such wonder. and he brushes his fingers across the gold embossing of an angel on one of the books there and dean just watches, listens to cas breathing, aches to touch.

he sets cas up in his old room, cas quirks a head when he sees all the suits and ties in the closet, says something like ‘now i understand why i woke up looking like a tax accountant’ and hes being good old cas, sticking so close to dean and he’s sitting beside him to watch a movie and miracle is sprawled across their legs and cas says, ‘i could get used to this’ and dean says, ‘yeah cas, me too.’ so they sit and they watch and they repeat that day in day out and the bunker isnt so lonely anymore, and he and cas do everything together, and dean researches spells to get cas’ memory back. he thinks it has to do with the fact that his grace got ripped out in the process, theres a small nick on his adams apple that he recognizes as the place it must have left, but he coughs himself out of thinking about that neck and those lips and that hair and those thighs and- he hasnt kissed cas since the first day, he longs to. he sees the way this cas looks at him and he wonders. he wonders if maybe...maybe this castiel can learn to love him again. and it’s going on a year now. cas works down at the local flower shop and has an apiary on the hill above the bunker, deans still in his same routine of life, and they’re not...they’re in the same place they were before cas confessed. just, in this middle ground, this unspoken something, so as he lies beneath a car he decides, the happiness isnt in the having its in just being in just saying it, so he goes home that night, picks up flowers from a competing shop bc he doesnt wanna spoil the surprise, and sets up the table. cas’ name is still carved there, cas had laughed when he first saw it because “what kind of long name is that,” and dean was bursting with fond. and anyways he lays down a table cloth and lights a candle and waits. shaking in his skin just waiting for cas to get home, and then cas is walking in saying ‘hello, dean’ and running down the stairs, groceries in paper bags overflowing in his arms, and his hair is disheveled and dean helps grab a bag and puts it in the kitchen and waits for cas to follow and see...the set up. and cas asks, what’s this about? and dean looks at cas and takes a deep breath and says, ‘someone once told me there’s happiness in just....fuck...in just saying it so here goes. and its okay if you..if you dont but...’ and cas is getting closer, his head quirked and deans heart is beating out of his chest and he says ‘i love you.’ and then cas is rumbling, ‘dean, look at me’ and so he does, looks up into wide blue eyes and cas is smiling. smiling so big and beautiful and dean wants to hear it he needs to hear it he needs- ‘i love you too, dean winchester’ and then theyre kissing again, kissing and holding and deans a little embarrassed but hes crying and then theyre skipping dinner entirely and cas has his hand on deans bare shoulder and hes shivering into the touch its so overwhelming and he fucks himself down onto cas’ cock and cas digs his fingernails into deans thighs and looks up at him blue and beautiful and overwhelming and deans pretty sure he blacks out when he comes except, he doesnt, because his eyes are open and the lights in the room are all busted and cas is lying there under him looking up, dean thinks so at least, he can’t really see him and so he laughs and he laughs and he’s not really registering what happened, a beautifully timed power outage like something divine saying this is how you met and he’s here still and you finally have him and so he climbs off of cas and grabs something to wash them up and a candle or two from the table and when he comes back, and wipes the damp cloth gingerly across cas’ body he notices cas tense and he sees in the candlelight cas is looking very serious and he stops being sweet just asks ‘cas? whats wrong’ and cas says, ‘dean? dean. dean winchester... dean...righteous soul the one i fell for and will always fall for the one i love the one i have always...’ and dean dives back on top of cas and kisses him senseless because now cas remembers everything before and he remembers everything after and everything now and its perfect

and honestly they still arent really sure what happened except that maybe the spell needed angel mojo so it snagged it from cas or maybe the empty curled itself around cas mind and all it needed was the Loud of too many emotions to overflood it but all that matters is that they are here together.

and then one day, at the dinner table, cas looks at dean and he says ‘dean, will you....’ and he shuffles inside his pocket and presses a box into deans hand and its- ‘will you marry me?’ and dean is practically leaping over the table to kiss cas and saying “yes yes yes of course of course i wanna grow old with you i wanna be with you always in life and death in everything always together”

and cas is crying because he could have what he wanted, he has the one thing he wants most and dean wants him most too.

and then dean is pulling back and cas is looking pensive and he says, ‘there is one thing, dean.’ and dean looks worried so he places his hand on his knee and he says, ‘i want to be human, all the way human.’ and dean looks like he wants to protest or cry and hes not sure which it is but then dean is crying and saying ‘ill help’ and then the next day theyre out with the bees, because cas thinks his grace will do them good, and dean holds cas’ hand in his tightly and follows that little nick on his throat and opens it ever so slightly with the angel blade and tries not to think about how hes hurting the person he loves and he loves and he loves and then the grace is flowing away and dean captures it in a bottle, hands it to cas, who later pats it down in the ground so they can grow a new tree, and dean gives cas two little stitches on his throat and kisses all around them and washes cas hair for him in the shower and then

when the day comes, they go together, they get to live with one another and watch the sunsets on their front porch with miracle and jack and sam and eileen all looking out over an eternal skyline.

#woops this was an accident i #destiel #deancas #destiel coda #spn spoilers #destiel ficlets #spn 15x20 #spn 15x20 coda #angel !! #king !! #long post

[freckles-and-wings]

I’ve rebuilt the universe waiting for you - 15.20 destiel coda

Whisky and gasoline.

With the entire universe at his disposal, Castiel still misses those two smells.

He misses Dean.

 “But you’re always there, you know? You’re the best friend we’ve ever had.”

Tearing down Heaven’s walls is like popping balloons of stardust. Each particle a different soul, exploding out into the ether with no more borders. The souls find each other, whether they’re meant to or not. It’s their decision now, who they spend eternity with.

A part of him would say he wants Heaven to be perfect, but he’s learned the hard way that perfection is a faulted lens. What he can give it is freedom, and the peace that comes with it. The peace that earth can never give.

 “It’s a gift. You keep those.”

Of course, he watches over Dean. And Sam. He sees the dog, he sees the bunker and a part of him misses it so much - it creeps up on him at the strangest times. He misses the hard wood, the dimmed lights, he misses the concreteness of it all.

He sees Dean trying, and he loves him for it.

Every day Dean gets out of bed, Castiel breaks down another wall.

It’s funny what people do with freedom. Some fall into old patterns, others branch out as fast and hard as they can. Castiel watches Mary and John - who Heaven, the old Heaven, put together… They scream in each other’s faces now. Too wrapped up in their destiny to leave, too unhappy to stay. But Castiel knows they need time and, in this new Heaven, there’s all the time they need.

  “Let me bottom line it for you: I'm not leaving here without you. Understand?”

Castiel has to ponder though if given the chance, would Dean stay with him? Would it be just out of gratitude? Would they, too, fall back into their shortcomings, and if so, for how long? But Castiel hates the thought because Dean still has so much time and so much love to give and he wants him to have it all.

But.

Castiel misses him.

 “I’d rather have you, cursed or not.”

When Dean arrives, he’s so much younger than Castiel wanted. So much more trauma on this man’s shoulder that Cas wants to fix so desperately.

And Castiel cries. It’s such a human reaction, it scares him. He’s never really cried in all the time he spent on Earth. He only cried before the Empty came, but even then it wasn’t sorrow. This time, the pain tucks into his chest and presses it down. For the first time, the word incommensurable rings true to the significance of the moment. Getting him back feels like losing him all over again. Because though Heaven might be ready for Dean Winchester, Dean Winchester should have had more time.

 “I should have stopped you. You’re my best friend, but I just let you go”

Castiel doesn’t greet him immediately. He lets Bobby go first. He figures Dean would want to meet the people he hasn’t seen in a long time. In a way, Cas only really just left.

“So Jack did all this, uh?”

“Well, Cas helped.”

Castiel sees it. The softness of Dean’s smile. It reassures him. Maybe Dean knew - hoped, even? - they’d meet again. Because his smile says that. He only needed to know how.

Castiel lingers a little longer, watching Dean.

Waiting.

Then it comes.

After the Roadhouse, after the welcome hugs, after Dean settles down in silence. Alone.

Dean’s voice. Clear as a bell.

“Cas, you got your ears on?”

___________________________________

Companion to this.

#destiel #deancas #destiel fanfic #destiel ficlet #spn 15x20 coda #my fanfiction

[sidecarghost]

Spn 15x20 Coda Sam & Dean in Heaven

Dean: Hey Sammy Sam: Dean Dean: *hugs Sam* Sam: So what have you been doing up here since getting nailed by the barn hook of death? Dean: I went for a drive in the Impala. Sam: For forty years? Dean: Yeah, Heaven!Baby doesn't run out of gas. I thought that was nice at first, but there are no gas stations so it got very boring. It's just forested road, and there really is no view when everything is just trees. Sam: That sounds pretty bland. Dean: Mmmm. Felt like Hell after I'd been driving for 40 years. Finally found this bridge and thought I'd stretch my legs. Not that it matters, because I don't have blood circulation anymore. Sam: Jeez, Heaven seems crappy. Dean: It is Sammy. It sure is... How was your life? Sam: Oh, I had a child and a co-parent. My child was AFAB, but since gender is a social construct I named them Dean and used they/them pronouns. I wanted Dean to find their own gender. Dean: That's very progressive of you Sam. Sam: I’d tell you more about my co-parent, but my memories of them are blurry. Uh, so what are your plans for the day? Dean: I’m busting out of Heaven. I think if I blow up enough shit here, at least I get a chance at getting cast down to Hell. Sam: You really want to go back there? Dean: Yeah, Rowena is queen there now, so hopefully I can skip the 40 years getting tortured on the rack. Anyway, it has to be better than this. And... and it's where Cas and I met, and I think I'd feel closer to him there. I never met Cas in Heaven. This place just feels wrong. Sam: Well, we can start by blowing up this bridge. Dean: Thanks Sammy, but you can stay here and reconnect with your family when they get to Heaven. Sam: Maybe I'll luck out, and they'll get damned to Hell with us. Dean: If we go Demon we can visit them on Earth. Sam: Jeez, going Demon Dean? How desperate are you to find Cas? Dean: I’d become Demon a thousand times to get a chance to talk to him again. Cas left before I could tell him I loved him.  Sam: I'm sure he knew. Dean: You're probably right, but I'd still like to tell him. I'm not sure if he's a wavelength, in a vessel, or part of a raindrop, but I want to tell him that I love him whatever form he is. He'll always be Cas to me. Sam: I hope you get the chance to tell him. Dean: Me too, Sammy.

Before Dean detonates the bridge, Cas suddenly appears stopping Sam and Dean from causing Heaven’s destruction. Cas time zaps them back to the barn of death and replaces the rebar with harmless rubber. After killing the vampires, Dean and Sam decide to retire from hunting. Dean and Cas get married and foster a bunch of monster and human kids. Everyone grows old and happy together, the end!

#destiel fic #spn 15x20 coda #gum writes

[angelsdean]

like, i get that some people are upset that dean is still in heaven but, it wasn't really a shock to me at all ?? sure i clowned a bit w/ the 'time traveling aliveboy dean' stuff but they literally said before the show even started that dean was on a "hiatus" from heaven and that was always in the back of my mind thru out my clowning. and it really was a hiatus from heaven ! it all took place in the heaven drive time gap as like a finale coda (and what a huge time gap that is to fill. there's still so much they can do w/ that bit of time alone imo). we also don't know how much jensen + robbie were allowed to change, there may have been stipulations w/ spnwin to not change the heaven finale, something that might have to wait for a reboot / continuation of spn prime.

but regardless, crucially ??? what spnwin did is it completely recontexualized dean's ending. i said this in the tags of this post but i'll say it again: the spn finale said. ok dean's dead. he waits for sam. and that's it. spnwin said. no actually !!! he's not accepting that peace !! he's not waiting around for sam !! and giving dean back that agency is important to me. giving dean back the ability to make his own choices and want things for himself is important to me.

and i know some people are doubtful that we'll get a s2 of spnwin, meaning dean's story would end here, on him being unhappy in heaven. but personally, i don't think it matters if we get a s2. i think jensen is Not done with dean or the spn prime story. he's said before that spnwin is only one of many stories he wants to explore in the spn universe. also, after that answer he gave recently at jibcon re: a destiel reunion, i think he def wants more spn ("hopefully we get to see that at some point / i'm sure it would go how we all think it would go" and dean wanting to talk abt the confession)

i think even if we don't get a s2, everything that spnwin established re: dean's story will be the foundation for that reboot / mini series they're always talking about. personally, i Don't think we'll see dean again if there is a s2. (tho we may hear him in voiceovers as they read his journal and use it as a guide. and we may learn more abt dean and his journey this way). overall, i think dean helped establish this story and these characters, but moving forward it will be focused on them and not dean (tho we will see familiar spn faces, and maybe they will get involved in the multiverse too and visit the main spn universe, who knows?)

i think we needed what spnwin gave us re: dean's story not being over, dean unhappy in heaven, dean still searching more, (hints about jack possibly being "off" too / chuck won theory...) as a foundation for future stories in the main spn universe post-15x20. we want to see dean bust out of heaven and find happiness right? well, the seeds for that have been planted. and i knowww that's asking for optimism and faith that we WILL see a continuation in the future, and i get that some people are just doubtful and hopeless, but i really think we will see a continuation in the (maybe not so distant) future. and imo having this foundation to work off w/ dean's recontextualized time in heaven is important for all the things we want to see in a continuation.

and like, even tho i'm annoyed that ppl think his 'ending' now is worse than it was in 15x20, i don't think it's wrong to feel upset, because if that really were where it ended for dean i wouldn't be happy either. but for me the thing is i really really do Not think this is it for dean. i don't think jensen will be satisfied w/ dean staying dead in heaven forever. it completely goes against the thesis of the show, and dean's personal desire for freedom over peace in 'paradise.' and after everything jensen said abt dean + cas reuniting, i think there's a lot of unresolved things in spn that he wants to address, and he'll keep trying to make more spn until we get a better ending for all these characters (bc lbr, sam's ending also sucked. we never saw cas again and all he got was a throwaway line in the finale. jack deserves better too. they all do).

#writing my little essays jsdkfd #vic.txt #long post

[adoptdontshoppets]

I should have had a tissue ready 😢

Twitter post

#devastating #the impala #dean’s death #spn 15x20 coda #mcd

[sinnabonka]

It’s 600 kudos already 👀 what.

X

#destiel fanfiction #destiel fic rec #spn 15x20 coda #spncreatorsdaily #destiel #deancas #spn #sinnabonka writes

[geektrashfan]

"This is it Sam, I can feel myself fading"

"DEAN YOU CAN'T--"

"After everything we've been through, I can't--"

"Dean after everything we've been through, everyone we lost, you can't leave me alone, not like this--

Jack, if you're listening, PLEASE, just one last miracle, one last time"

Sam can see his brother's eyes droop, the light going slowly.

Not like this. We faced worse, you can't go like this

"Jack ple--"

He wasnt expecting to be cut off by a flash of bright light--

So much for a blaze of glory- a fucking vamp mime got him.

Dean feels the black closing in, his heart slowing, and the cliched flashes of life. The last is a flash of the familiar trench coat--

"How is he doing?" Eileen signs while putting down the coffee.

"Could be better, but yea he's out of danger"

"I'm sorry Sam, if I had been with you on the hunt I could have helped, I could ha--"

"May be you would have been dying too. We are no longer Chuck's favourites so who knows what could have happened. And I cant afford to see you both like this"

With a soft smile, Eileen cups Sam's face with a look that tells him 'things are going to be okay now'

"Hey, I have a thought. What do you think about not going out there? We can set up a base, we have the bunker, handle logistics and research" and I can be like Bobby

"Do you think it'll work?"

"Why not? We both know a normal apple pie life isn't for us, at least not for the Winchesters. And Garth managed it well, has a wife and kids. May be he could give me pointers on how to go about doing it."

"Getting a wife and kids?"

"A middle ground somewhat, but yea..the wife thing too"

"I guess it doesnt hurt to try..both"

When he opened his eyes, Dean was expecting cookie-cutter heaven (or greeted by Rowena). What he didnt expect was being back in his bed in the bunker, with the soft hairy mess of Miracle at his feet.

"What memory is this now?"

"It's not a memory Dean"

The low gravelly voice snapped him fully awake. There he was, on a chair beside Dean's bed, blue tie, trench coat, messy hair and suit-back in full form.

"Cas--is that really you? Are you really here?"

"Yes it's me" Cas stares into the green eyes

"I regret not coming sooner, heaven needed me."

"Heaven? You went back to heaven but you didnt come home? So what, Jack being God means you're back to being a soldier?"

"That is--that isnt the case Dean. Jack is hands-off and he needed someone to be there, to set things up. The bomb, the empty--it threw everyone out, for quiet time. Angels are back and most of them werent adjusting well with new boss. It took some convincing, but finally there is a new order upstairs. I have been there, keeping the peace, with some close-knit people."

"Okay--wow. Reordering Heaven, what--what are the chang--you know what, I dont even want to be bothered. As long as those winged idiots stay in line and dont threaten your life--"

"I dont think they'll want to go against the boss' father"

Both chuckle at that..so it wasnt a dream, Jack really is God and Cas really is back, and Dean is free...

"There's something more Dean. I'm..I'm not an angel anymore...I am human."

It takes more than a second for Dean to register that..

"Cas" He tries for casual but the shaky voice gives it away, "you said something, right before--did you--how long have you felt this way?"

"A long time"

"And you still do?"

"Yes"

"Stay here then, with us, with me. This is your home after all"

"Of course"

"I guess I should see the sasquatch"

"I'll go get them"

Dean watched Cas move and felt a warmth spread across his chest. "Hey Cas, I love you too"

---------------------------------

"How you feeling?"

"Scared and nervous"

"Dude, you punched God"

"But this is different. This is committing my life to someone, sharing all the good and bad"

"You and me share all the good and bad"

"You know what I mean! But hey, I got you and Cas right here, the good-old-married-couple example"

"We've been together for a year, tops"

"Oh like I didnt suffer the CasDean UST for a decade"

"Whats that?"

"Nothing"

"May I have this dance?"

"Do you see anyone else lining up to dance with me?" Cas rolled his eyes, some things dont change after all

"Gotta say, seeing the big family together at a wedding is pretty great...wish mom and dad could see this"

"Well, they are watching over you, new heaven order and all"

"You know, Sam had this life planned, with Jess, before dad disappeared and all this craziness started. He got his happy life in some way or the other"

"And you didnt have it planned?"

"I thought I'd be dead by now, the way I had been living. Never thought I'd live to see grey hair"

"I like the grey"

And I like this, you and me happy together.

----------------------------------

"What if the baby doesn't like me?"

"He'll like you just fine"

"It's a nerd baby"

"Baby arent born nerds Dean. And besides, he's Sam's kid, no way he wont adore you"

"You think so?"

"Yeah"

May be Charlie is right. I mean Sam loves him, no reason the baby wouldn't.

Wow, his baby brother has a baby now, talk about time flying.

"How are they doing? Is everything fine at the hospital? Did the baby come yet? I got one of every toy."

Okay, Cas is definitely way way more anxious.

"Relax you people, if you're freaking out now, I have news for you...parenthood is hard" Jody chimes in

"It's not like we dont have any experience, Jack had his trouble period"

That earns a big laugh.

"Cas..Jack was a special kid, human kids are more trouble"

"Ohh"

Dean can get used to this. This soft domestic life, theres no picket fence but theres plenty love. He still occassionally thinks he doesnt deserve it, when he does, Cas is right by his side to kiss that worry away.

#spn #spn spoilers #spn ficlet #spn 15x20 fix it #spn finale fix it #spn fix it fic #spn 15x20 coda #spn finale coda #destiel endgame #saileen endgame

[demonicseries]

wrote a crack fic in which Sam makes it his life goal to raise awareness for tetanus after Dean’s death

#spn #spn crack #sam winchester #spn fanfic #spn 15x20 #spn 15x20 coda #fanfic #fanfiction #ao3 #crack!fic #spn crack!fic #tetanus