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akuvvv9 · 7 months

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no bc i am CONVINCED something happened between Mike and Will between season 2 and season 3 and here’s why.

The first scene we see of them together is on the movie date at the cinema. (Also, why show Mike noticing something is up with Will in the first place? Will doesn’t even confide in him about what he’s feeling, so why? It’s unnecessary unless they want to show us something about Mike and Will. And if it’s to show Will’s feelings for Mike through lip glances, WHAT ABOUT MIKE???)

Mike looks at Will’s lips while asking if he’s okay, meaning he had been already looking at him since Will hadn’t made any noise or drawn any attention to himself before Mike talks to him. There are many many many scenes of Mike looking at Will’s lips to the point that it’s a meme.

But then, look at Will. We all know Will is in love with Mike, has been for a while he just didn’t fully realize it until some time between season 2 and season 3, and didn’t accept it until some time between season 3 and season 4 (just in my opinion, this is flexible based off of your own perspectives and understandings). Either way, he has always been more discreet, looking when Mike isn’t looking at him in contrast to how Mike checks Will out both when he is and isn’t taking notice.

(Another thought, if we were supposed to pick up on the fact that Will is gay by the fact that he wears shorts shorts, BARELY EVER checks Mike out, is told “it’s not my fault you like girls,” and has been bullied for being queer, what does this say about Mike? Sure, he doesn’t wear short shorts, he wasn’t bullied for being queer except in regards to Will’s queerness, THEN it was always directed towards Mike, and Mike is always checking Will out and I’m gonna keep saying that because people are blind, and the fact that he even said that to Will in their rain fight was so out of nowhere like…what have you been thinking about when you’re alone? Huh? (i know what you are Michael Wheeler.) Then what? The only difference between the two is that Mike has a girlfriend, who he can’t even tell he loves to her face. Just saying. And I know Mike is queer coded in a different way than Will, but he also has all that proof I listed above and probably more. Moving on lol…)

Here’s some of Will looking at Mike in the arcade in S2E1 and in the grocery store in the fruit section S3E7. I don’t need to show examples for Mike because I’m sure we can all think of a bunch off the top of our heads. Will is a little harder to catch though.

Even in season 4 when we all KNOW Will has feelings for Mike, his glances are more discreet, we just see it more often because we are supposed to be aware he’s in love with Mike. So why, just why, does Will glance at Mike’s lips TWICE in the cinema. He knows Mike can see him because they’re talking, Mike is facing him, looking at him because he’s worried and is checking up on him. You could argue it’s because it’s dark, but their faces are illuminated by the screen, so it’s still a bold move on Will’s part. He knows Mike is looking at him and makes the decision to look at his lips twice when he’s usually so good at looking only when Mike can’t notice he is because he already has the subconscious feeling that he is in love with Mike, and that it should be a secret. Especially with what he’s always been bullied for by both his own dad and people at school. He’s learned to hide, which is funny because we all know how good at hiding Will is.

Mike on the other hand, bitch has been checking Will out since the very beginning. When Will tells Mike the roll was a 7, Mike just stares at him. He doesn’t even give a proper response, which is out of character for him. If it were Lucas or Dustin (who wouldn’t of told him the truth in the first place), he would have said something, like actually anything. But with Will, he doesn’t. He just stares at him.

We also know Mike & Will have a deep understanding of each other where they don’t need words to communicate. They finish each other sentences a lot, and in the 7 scene, when Will says, “it was a 7,” Mike furrows his brow. Will knows he’s asking a question without needing any verbal response, so he answers. And even then Mike doesn’t answer, just stares and watches as Will bikes away. (Kinna LGBTQ if you ask me).

Their ability to converse silently with little looks only adds onto the fact that Will thought he was picking up on something after season 2. He doesn’t need to be explicitly told by anybody that Mike is starting to realize things about himself and his feelings for Will because nonverbal communication is what the two have always been best at.

Back to the cinema date, it’s not weird for Mike to be checking Will out because he’s always been doing it. It’s also pretty brief in the movie theater, like he’s doing it with no thought behind it because it’s what he’s always done, so what’s the harm?

Now, for Will, he not only lip glances twice but it’s a longer gaze. A little linger. There is clearly something between them that only Will is reacting to because Mike is preoccupied trying to act straight with El. Maybe some hope that he could be grasping onto something between them.

Later, Will tells his mom he isn’t gonna fall in love. He doesn’t scowl or have a disgusted tone compared to when he saw proof of Jonathan and Nancy’s love. He probably believes that he’s not gonna fall in love, or get reciprocated love, for many reasons. He’s realizing he’s gay, he’s realizing Mike is special to him, he’s realizing that he is also special to Mike, but he says he won’t fall in love because even if he does, even if he’s realizing he’s also special to Mike, Mike can’t love him back because he has El.

Which is why I believe something happened between them some time between season 2 and season 3. It’s clear that El can’t hang out with the party with the way it’s established how she has a curfew and how Mike reacts to her being at the mall with Max.

Also, Dustin was away at summer camp for a month. This means Mike and Will were left alone with the other canon couple in the party, Lucas and Max. Mike and Will spent a lot of time together, and probably picked up on a lot of signs they were attracted to each other.

The differences between how they reacted to that are hidden between their families. Despite being bullied for being queer, Will has Jonathan who is seen supporting Will and his “freakness”. However, Mike doesn’t have anyone like that. He’s probably never seen his parents be in love. The difference between him and Nancy is that Mike is a boy who likes a boy and Nancy is a girl who likes a boy. So Mike hides in his girlfriend to avoid the feelings he knows he has for his best friend.

Anyway, the reason why Will decidedly looks at Mike’s lips when he knows he’s looking, why he lingers and does it twice, is because that he felt okay doing this action for once since Mike did something to make him feel like he could.

Then later, on S3E3, we get the Byler rain fight scene. At first, it really is all about their friendship and how Will feels left behind. But after Mike says, “It’s not my fault you like girls,” the gears shift in Will’s head. We then focus a lot on his face. He doesn’t say anything, meaning we are supposed to be reading something just from his expression. He looks hurt, for obvious reasons, but also like he wants to say something back but he can’t. And it’s noticeable how quiet he is after Mike says that in comparison to how much he was talking before. He thought Mike and him had something that summer, that those lip glances and nonverbal signs and cues meant something, but then it all comes crumbling down once Mike says those words. Will wants to say something, maybe about how he thought he had a chance, how Mike made him think he did, (or maybe even “What the fuck, Mike!?” because…wtf Mike,) but then he realized he didn’t.

This is further backed by what Will says in response to Mike talking about them playing games in his basement forever. “Yeah. I guess I did. I really did.” Because he really thought there was the possibility of that, thought he was picking up on something, but Mike’s words made him realize he didn’t. He was just projecting his own romantic feelings onto the scenario. He’s upset at Mike and himself for being so stupid, stupid for different reason though.

Only fools rush in, and in this moment, Will believes he is the biggest fool of them all.

SOMETHING HAPPENED BETWEEN WILL AND MIKE EARLIER THAT SUMMER AND I KNOW IT.

or maybe i’m delusional because it’s 2am

#byler #stranger things #will byers #mike wheeler #byler proof #byler theory #byler analysis

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dean-a-mean-tae · 26 days

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Updated "Western" Friends | Stray Kids Additional Member AU

Nicholas is still friends with some of the other people from the 1st western friends post, but he's also made new ones.

WARNINGS: Let me be delusional. Mention of Cardi and Nicki scandal. "Fans" being weird about Nicholas and his friendship with women. I don't know if there's anything else.

Nicholas Ross Master List

✧*̥˚𝘽𝙞𝙡𝙡𝙞𝙚 𝙀𝙞𝙡𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙝*̥˚✧

Menaces To Society

Nicholas was a fan of Billie since Ocean Eyes. He eventually reached out to congratulate her on making it big, and give her a heads up on what to expectation versus reality on the spot light. He told her to reach out if she ever needed anything or just to talk to him.

Surprisingly, Billie reached out very randomly and just needed to rant. She claimed it felt "better to rant to someone not in the situation because then they wouldn't be biased." She was right. Nicholas was able to give her multiple perspectives on what she was going through while coming to a conclusion on how she felt. They've been friends since.

Nicholas kind of adopted Billie and now they have a great friendship. Unfortunately, there are some people who think it's creepy for Nicholas to be friends with Billie and continuously express that. It doesn't stop Billie from posting about Nicholas being a dumbass. "It's moments like this where I question your logic. Cause what made you think that was a good idea?"

Bonus: Billie is aware of some of Nicholas's trauma thanks to the few videos he's done on them, but she wants, and is waiting, for him to tell her himself.

✧*̥˚𝘾𝙖𝙧𝙙𝙞 𝘽*̥˚✧

I'm Not Fighting You, But She'll Do It For Me

Unsurprisingly, Megan is the one who introduced them to each other. She wanted to know if the three of them could do a collab. Unfortunately, JYP didn't approve of this so the idea was scrapped. But that didn't stop Cardi and Nicholas from keeping in touch.

The feud between Cardi and Nicki started the distance between Nicholas and Nicki. Nicholas knows the Barbz, or Nicki's fans, started the feud but it irritated him that the two continued it. He, of course, never spoke on it no matter how many times people asked about it. Nicholas's continuous stance of staying indifferent in the situation, even though he knew Nicki before Cardi, is also what pulled her further into nurturing him.

Shortly, after Nicholas and Nicki had a fall out, Cardi stepped in to help take care of him. When Nicki stopped checking in, Cardi checked in. When Nicki stopped responding, Cardi would respond and constantly reach out. "Listen, you ain't gotta worry about her no more, aight? Ima look out for you."

Bonus: Cardi made sure she told Nicholas about her pregnancy with Wave (her son) before he found about the news. She said it made it more special to hear it from the momma rather than some news person.

✧*̥˚𝘾𝙤𝙘𝙤 𝙅𝙤𝙣𝙚𝙨*̥˚✧

The Funniest and The Hottest

Nicholas is known by American Stays to say Coco Jones quotes. There are so many compilations of him quoting other famous people and eventually it got onto Coco's feed. She tweeted a clip of him quoting her word for word with a goofy look and all.

Their friendship isn't really known because they don't interact in public. With them living on different sides of the planet, the time zones, and the lack of interaction on the internet, it's not a easy thing to point out.

They're such bad influences on each other. Stay already knew Nicholas was a goofball, but when he met Coco and they did video collabs together with Terrell, everyone realized Nicholas was a idiot who needed to be protected at all costs.

Bonus: They communicate through memes and TikTok, which is amusing to the boys. Their whole message feed thingy is filled with pictures and videos.

✧*̥˚𝙇𝙖𝙮 𝘽𝙖𝙣𝙠𝙨*̥˚✧

Tall & Lean and Short & Slim

Ironically, Nicholas learned about her through TikTok because of her song Ick. He played the song in front of his father, and the man was disgusted that this was the music his son was listening to. For the whole time he visited his family, Nicholas had the song on repeat.

Nicholas sent Lay a DM to thank her for helping him piss her parents off. After explaining what happened after a very confused response from her, she found the situation hilarious and posted about it while making sure to keep his identity hidden.

If you thought people went crazy about Nicholas and Billie, imagine their reaction to his friendship with a 19 year old. After this Nicholas just kind of adopted Lay and added her to his list of adoptive children. It only consists of Billie and Lay, but it's the fact he has "kids" that leaves him tickled.

They're is a time difference so they kind of just spam each other and wait for the other to reply. Usually, Nicholas is up late so it means he can respond when Lay is getting up in the morning.

Bonus: Nicholas got Lay to help prank Chan by using a voice effect that made her sound like a kid. It went something along the lines of him telling Chan he needed help keeping his kid hidden with Chan being confused on when Nicholas had time to actually have a child without him knowing.

Nicholas Ross Master List | ©️DEANAMEANTAE2024

Tag List: @bada-lee-ily @jinnie-ret @hwxnghyynjin @foxilsdenn @rensahazard @mynameisnotlaura @lucianidealz @ziipzeepzop-eez @ilovejeongin007 @michelle4eve @leezanetheofficial @spookzyclown

You can be added by asking in the replies, sending me a message, or doing an ask thingy.

#deantae nicholas ross #skz 9th member #stray kids 9th member #stray kids x reader #skz x reader #skz x male reader #stray kids x male reader #skz x 9th member #stray kids extra member #stray kids with the 9th member #9th member of skz #9th member of stray kids #skz added member #kpop added member #stray kids added member #kpop addition #kpop extra member

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daydream-cement · 11 months

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Hi sorry to bother you, I was wondering if you could do Gwendoline’s characters with a non binary s/o? Also unrelated but I love your work ❤️

Gwen’s Characters With A Non-Binary SO

Authors Note: Thank you so much for requesting this! @bri-sonat wrote for Brienne and Phasma and (of course) double-checked my work as well :))

Larissa Weems

She tries not to be too invasive, but Larissa has many questions about her partner’s identity and how she can support her partner

From her work with the students, she has some experience with using new pronouns and names. She will immediately adjust to her partner’s identity.

Larissa loves pet names and will double-check to make sure her pet names for her partner are validating and wanted.

She becomes very invested in helping her partner express themselves through their personal style and fashion. If it's wanted, she will use her abilities to help her partner test out different styles and outfits.

In order to help with dysphoria, Larissa will provide words of affirmation and small acts of service to soothe her partner in whatever way she can.

Larissa is a wonderful confidant so if her partner isn’t out, their identity is safe with her and she will be happy to alter the way she speaks about them depending on the setting.

She is very quick with compliments and she quickly learns to tailor them so they are genuine affirmations of her partner’s gender.

If she has any questions about how to help her non-binary students, Larissa is quick to sit down and talk with her partner to gain another perspective.

Larissa loves so intensely that her partner’s gender is secondary. She is happy to accommodate any changes to make them feel loved.

Miranda Hilmarson

She is so happy for her partner when they come out to her. She is so proud of them and feels so honored to be trusted with their identity.

She definitely does a TON of research about her partner’s identity as she is worried about seeming ignorant. Post-research she has just a few more questions to make sure she fully understands.

Miranda is not a great secret keeper but if her partner isn’t out yet, she will guard that secret with her whole being.

In fear of misgendering her partner, Miranda will practice her partner’s pronouns (or name) in private to make sure she never gets it wrong. If she were to get it wrong, she will apologize profusely and feel terrible.

(If her partner is out) All of Miranda’s friends will know her partner’s correct pronouns (and/or name) by the sheer amount in which she talks about her partner. She will brag about them and talk about them 24/7 at work.

Miranda loves seeing her partner in clothes so she is happy to offer up a sweatshirt or t-shirt for those dysphoric days.

Miranda will get a small non-binary pride flag to keep in her apartment to show her partner that “my apartment is a safe space for you.”

She is very supportive (if not completely ecstatic) of her partner to try out new haircuts or styles to better represent their identity. She wants to be there for all the trips to the hairdresser or to the store just so she can be there to support all of the decisions.

Miranda tries to understand her partner’s gender to the best of her ability so she can send them memes, posts, and TikToks that could be funny or relatable for her partner.

Brienne of Tarth

Considering there was no such thing as non-binary (or any form of labels, to be fair) back in Brienne’s time, it would be referred to as “genderless” by both Brienne and her partner.

When Brienne’s significant other first explained it to her and how they felt about their identity, she was a little confused but eventually understood after some questions and answers.

She’s very respectful about what she refers to her partner as and asks them what would be okay and what would not be in terms of “gendered” terms. Eventually landing in “my partner,” and “my romantic companion.”

If her partner wants to alter their name and have Brienne call them something else in private, she would be more than supportive and try her best to adjust as fast as possible. If she slips in the first few days, she feels incredibly guilty and apologizes profusely.

If her significant other wishes to keep the new name and identity to themselves and Brienne only, she’d respect her partner’s wishes but every time someone refers to her partner by their old name or calls them a girl, she has the most challenging time holding her tongue - wanting to correct them, but she manages to keep quiet. Her respect and loyalty to her love are stronger than anything else.

When/if her partner voices a discomfort or dysphoria with their body and their feminine traits, she will observe and take notes on what she can do to help on the rougher days.

She always lets her partner wear her clothes that are far too large for them, just to offer some more affirming clothing than the ones that are tailored to their body and often show their curves.

She will offer to cut their hair if they want to go shorter or just maintain the length they currently have if it’s already short.

She will try her best to offer any type of euphoric or affirming moment on any day, but especially the harder ones.

Every single day will she tell them how much she loves them and how much they mean to her, and how perfect they are just the way they are.

Captain Phasma

When her partner explains it to her, she doesn’t say more than: “Good for you.”

Even if her initial reaction was very careless and crass, she does take it in and adjusts slightly in the way she thinks about them.

She will not be all lovey-dovey or gentle about it all, but she will be somewhat supportive, in her own Phasma way.

If someone misgenders her partner in her proximity, she will aggressively correct them if their partner has shared their identity with them that is. If they have not, she will not say anything, against her own invasive urges.

If her significant other wants her to call them something else, she will. It’s going to take a couple of days and she will slip, but she will eventually lock it in. Whenever she does slip up when talking to her partner, she will correct herself and move on. They won’t get an apology out of Phasma, but she wants her partner to know that she was aware of her slip-up in some way.

If her partner is out, she will correct someone using their old name in her usual stern way, and if she slips when talking about them to someone else, (which she never will cause when she talks about them to someone else she uses their title and last name, but on the off-chance that she uses their title and first name) she will quickly correct herself and tell the other person that, “If I hear you calling them the name I accidentally used, I am going to rip your tongue out so you can never call anyone anything ever again.”

And for the more dysphoric days, she doesn’t quite know what to do. Her initial attempts don’t really work (like saying, “You’re hot.”) so she disinterestedly asks what she can do to help or “whatever.”

She ends up throwing her large shirts her partner’s way when they voice their thoughts on how they are feeling. She also silently drags them to the hairdresser if her partner so wishes for an affirming haircut.

She’s supportive in her own aggressive way.

Lucifer Morningstar

Lucifer just gets it.

They try not to use too much of their own experience to anticipate their partner’s wants and needs, so they will have a few questions to be as responsive as possible.

Even with their busy schedule ruling hells, they will happily sit and listen to their partner talk about their experience or challenges. There is no mercy for those who interrupt your time together.

They would encourage their partner to be open and proud of their new identity but are supportive of their partner’s wish to not come out if they so choose - either way, Lucifer will use the correct pronouns (and/or name).

Due to Lucifer’s own non-binary identity, Hell is a place that quickly accepts changes in an individual's orientation or identity. On the odd chance that someone is not accepting of Lucifer’s partner, that daemon or being will be turned into ash with the flick of Lucifer’s wrist.

They are delighted in helping their partner alter their appearance to feel more affirmed and will often tell their partner, “You have no need to want for anything. Whatever your heart desires, I will make it so.”

They love to pull their partner into their lap and wrap them up in their arms when their partner is feeling more dysphoric. They will whisper sweet affirmations for a short while before asking if they could interest their partner in a walk through the gardens.

Jane Murdstone

She doesn’t quite understand at first, only responding with “I see. Thank you for telling me.” Jane is quick to bring up the subject again later that evening or the next day as she truly had no clue what ‘non-binary’ or ‘genderless’ meant.

It may take her a few explanations to understand fully, but she is never unaccepting or rude about her partner’s wishes. She doesn’t make a very big deal of the change and will often ask a single question and answer with an “Mhmm. Thank you.” as she internally sorts through the new information.

The Victorian era was not an accepting one so her partner’s gender will most likely be kept private along with their relationship with Jane.

Jane wants to verbally eviscerate anyone who misgenders her partner, but chooses to silently seethe instead to avoid outing her partner in any way.

She is very deliberate with her words and will be determined to use the correct pronouns (and/or name) whenever she has the opportunity.

She most definitely surprises her partner with trousers and loose-fitting shirts to wear around their rooms.

She is quick to utilize compliments that she finds to be more genderless, such as, “You are looking quite attractive today, sweeting.”

Her partner will often hear her cursing ‘the latest fashion trends’ and how they are ‘quite repressive and reprehensible’ as the fashion of the day was designed to accentuate women’s curves.

Jane loves to read her partner poetry or novels and will often change the pronouns of the love interest just for them.

Taglist: @charymobile, @ihavenoclue2008, @opheliauniverse, @alex-nyx, @renravens, @whenyouhaveanobsession, @scream-queenlover, @shyladyfan, @rubberduckiesbathing, @mcufanisme, @peanutbutterprincess, @lvinhs, @myzzjolanda, @brienneswife, @dumbasslesbi, @kay-liah-scope, @kimiinou, @sweetderacine, @giogwensversion, @gela123, @thevillagegay, @naomi-m3ndez, @mysaviorfalsegod

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callmearcturus · 1 month

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writer questions meme: 8, 13, 20 if you please

13. What’s the best writing advice you’ve ever come across?

It wasn't explicitly writing advice, but I can tell you where I learned what my specific style would be. There was a fic in the Dresden Files fandom called "Cross" by LightGetsIn. LGI was a tremendous writer and a very kind mentory-friend who I attended my first fan convention with. Extremely accomplished adult who I looked up to when I was barely an adult.

"Cross" is a story about the limitations of perspective. It was the first story that really drove home the idea that Character A would not have the same knowledge and understanding of the world as Character B.

In "Cross", the POV character is John Marcone, a non-magical mafia boss who is deeply entrenched in the magical world. He has a lot of factual knowledge of how magic works, but he's an Italian-American Catholic. So when he's pulled into doing magical rites to bring another character back to life, he specifically doesn't pick up on the more pagan symbology of what he's doing, but filters it through a Guilty Catholic filter. Hence the name of the fic, "Cross."

And that story, which isn't even my favorite LGI story, probably taught me the most about how to write Close Perspective Third Person, which is my default style. When I'm writing in a characters POV, I rigorously limit what the POV character knows and picks up on. I will plant clues and information that the audience will understand, but the connections a character makes, the reference pools they pull from, their morality and ethics, all of those inform that POV, and what you and I know does not.

That is probably the most important lesson I've ever had in creating my own writing method.

20. Describe your perfect writing conditions.

8 hours of sleep, small breakfast snack like a croissant, decaf beverage, one dextroamphetamine, and no one fucking talk to me for about 2 - 4 hours. I will write 4,000 words.

8. Share a snippet from one of your favorite dialogue scenes you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

Lets put this under a cut, and I'll give you some DVD commentary. This is from chapter 2 of you'll need a new name to survive this. It's the point where Benji realizes Ethan is stalking him and does that trick to lose him in the bookshop, then sits outside waiting for him.

Only five minutes later, the door opened, and Bell took one step out before freezing, his eyes falling on Benji.

Got you, Benji thought with a sharp little smile. "You didn't even buy a book? Bit rude."

One of the goals of the early chapters of PT AU was establishing Benji's character as boldly as possible because we were essentially telling a story that canon does not. This is YEARS before MI3, where Benji gets two gd scenes.

To me, the tightrope walk was that I wanted Benji to have a reasonable grip on authority, to be shiny and new and out of his depth but still empowered because of his accomplishments. He has managed to land a good job working for the US government, he successfully emigrated before he was 30 years old, he has an apartment and a cat, he's new to everything in the spy world but he also has a steel spine that frankly he's fucking earned.

Which is a long-winded way of saying that Benji is a bitch and I love him so much.

Bell's face was blank, but Benji could almost feel how fast his brain was moving, weighing his options. Eventually, he settled on huffing out a little chuckle and stepping closer to Benji. "Hi."

Meanwhile, Ethan. MI1-era Ethan is very very smart but very very traumatised. His skillset is rooted in controlling people and predicting them. So Benji, a fucking civilian, catching him off-guard like this is like waving a red flag at a bull. Or dangling a steak over a lion enclosure. Benji doesn't know it yet but he's setting himself up to be a tasty treat for Ethan Hunt circa the late 90s.

"Are you going to kill me or something?" Benji asked. "Is that your spook job, are you a hitman?"

The flash of expression on Bell's face was offended. (This makes me laugh every time. Ethan Hunt is not a killer unless he absolutely must be and he will go out of his way to avoid it. Being an assassin is gross and he doesn't want to be perceived at all bc he's a spy but if he MUST be perceived jfc don't assume he's a HITMAN) "What, no. I just…" Grimacing, he looked away, eyes scanning the other pedestrians around them. "Okay, I'm screwing this up, I can admit that. Can we talk somewhere private?"

Benji didn't even have to think about it. "We can talk somewhere public."

Benji is never going to be an IMF agent but his instincts are wildly correct. And that knowledge comes from a different place! He was a gay punk rock vagabond who dropped out of law school, he knows how to keep out of trouble. He is probably the guy who told his other punk friends "if you are arrested do not say a goddamn thing, just ask for your public defender, don't joke, don't be a smartarse, keep your mouth shut."

The smile that took over Bell's face was lovely, transforming his whole face from storm clouds to something more seasonal. "That's honestly a very smart answer, doc. C'mon, there's a bakery nearby. I'll buy you a coffee. Least I can do."

It really was, so Benji nodded and followed him.

They didn't speak until Bell opened the glass door to another shop and held it open for Benji.

"Wrong hand," Benji said, noticing the small wince Bell let out.

"Inside, doc."

If it isn't obvious, all of the observational skills Benji has canonically have been funneled into his preternatural observation of patients.

Basically, if Benji as a character has a specific set of SPECIAL stats, all of those are the same, he just has different tagged skills in this universe.

Canon Benji is probably.... Guns, Science, and Repair. PT Benji has Medicine, Barter, Speech.

"Not a doctor," Benji said. "You know I'm not a doctor."

"What do you want to drink, doc?"

Ethan is being purposefully annoying and I could write a whole post about Ethan's soft power and the way he manipulates people, but that'd be another post. Short version: some people you seduce, some people you act like a wounded gazelle at, and some people you annoy.

Inside the bakery was loud. It was a strangely open floor plan. A long pastry case cordoned off the seating area for the customers. On the other side was just… the bakery. There were ovens and industrial mixers and rolling racks of cooling bread. In the corner, the espresso machine howled with noise as the milk frother worked.

It smelled divine, like living inside a baguette during a spring shower of dark roast coffee.

It also was a constant racket, which Benji mentioned to Bell as he sat down and slid a dark tea with vanilla syrup across to Benji.

"That's the point," Bell said, slouching back in his chair. "It's very difficult to eavesdrop in here."

Well, he wasn't wrong. Looking to another occupied table nearby, Benji briefly tried to pick out a word of what was being said by the woman seated closest to him. Nothing.

"Right, then," Benji said, attention back on Bell. "Why are you following me?"

"Why?" Bell seemed taken aback.

One of the many moments in the early chapters that establish that Ethan's perception of Normal is not anything approaching actual normal.

"Yes, why."

"Normal intelligence collection."

"On your physical therapist?" Benji asked with a barked laugh.

"Yeah." Bell leaned on his elbows, one hand cupping his own jaw and holding his head up as he made uncomfortably direct eye contact. "You really don't know who I am? Or why some of the appointments on your calendar come with no information?"

Pursing his lips, Benji shook his head.

Blowing out a whistle through his teeth, Bell grinned. "Sorry, that's just… it's new. I'm surprised Dr. Falsion didn't clue you in, but I guess she's not technically supposed to." Lifting his mug, he looked down into it. "People do shit they're not technically supposed to all the time in this town."

Ethan's major trauma at this point is being targeted by Kittridge and the Mole Hunt, and his trust in people to do their jobs is at a critical low that it'll never recover from.

"I don't even know your name," Benji sighed, sipping his own drink. It didn't taste at all like iocaine powder, so he was probably safe for the moment.

Bell rested his temple against the knuckles of his hand, his gaze so intense that Benji didn't know how to look away without making it patently obvious he was unsettled. Whatever Bell saw, it made his lips curve up slight. "Alright. Yeah. My name is Ethan. I work for an organization that shouldn't legally exist, so that's why you don't get anything on me. Even CIA jackboots manipulating local governments are realer than I am." He blinked once. "Also, I was an unprofessional shitheel last session, and I apologize."

Ethan apologizes here because Benji has earned his respect. And also by earning his respect, Ethan is also aware that Benji is not going to be so easy to maneuver around, so he fesses up that he was a prick, softly setting up a different tactic with Benji.

Benji felt his eyes going wider and wider with every sentence until it was a little hard to breathe. So his patient wasn't the American equivalent of an MI5 or MI6 so much as an MI8?

That did sort of start to explain what a pain in the ass he was.

"Shame," Benji managed after a moment of sitting fairly gobsmacked. "I was getting attached to 'Bell.' But I appreciate… all that. Thanks." He frowned. "Are you saying all this because you're actually sorry or are you sick of being stonewalled?"

Benji has a much more cynical mind than Ethan is the funny thing. Benji gets arguably more accurate reads on people than Ethan does. Or, Ethan gets accurate reads but he is continuously poisoned by the hope that people will be better than he expects. So FUNCTIONALLY, Ethan is an optimist and Benji is a realist.

Bell— Ethan— grinned. "That's a very good question. You actually have great instincts, doc. You did a surprisingly good job of shaking me when I was tailing you, especially for a civilian."

One of my favorite running gags is Benji being impossible to tail, so I'm glad we really drove it home the first time it happened. I love consistency in longfic.

"Again: thanks. Don't suppose you'll answer my other question?"

Ethan sipped his coffee, his smile visible around the edge of his cup.

"Right," Benji sighed. At least this felt like progress. And at least he probably wasn't going to be disappeared by a government assassin. That was a relief.

So this entire bit is Ethan reassessing Benji and pivoting his methods and tactics, setting up for a better way of handling Benji. And also being kind of charmed by him.

#relaxed-and-extremely-uneasy #talking about writing #pt benji au

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odditycollector · 12 days

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gamdave for the ask meme! and or, erijake??

Dave/Gamzee

1. I am not sure there is another pair of people in homestuck who have quite so skewed a ratio of "resounding & negative impact on each others' lives" and "fucks given about that".

Like, okay, I am p sure Dave does not understand that Gamzee manifested Lil Cal as a physical object, and I am p sure that Gamzee does not regret his awakening as a murderous shitlord, but you see what I am saying here.

2. Serendipity meets Final Destination

Gamzee and Dave are two random strangers who share a minor act of assholery between each other. So minor. Like, maybe they are both at the convenience store at 3am for doritos, and there is only one bag of chips left. And Gamzee snipes the chips out of Dave's almost closed fingers, and in response to his smug sneer Dave crunches the bag, making the chips not be triangles anymore.

And neither really remembers this moment the next day because it is so petty and let's be real they were both probably stoned. But somehow the fateful repercussions from this event are rippling out into the world like a terrible Rube Goldberg avalanche, starting with minor misfortunes and building quickly into mass destruction and death.

Meanwhile Dave and Gamzee are going about their lives with an occasional bemused glance at a wackily awful newscast.

Anyway, it seems like things are dominoing into some kind of worldwide calamity, BUT ACTUALLY everything has been lining up to get Gamzee and Dave onto the same stage so they can have the greatest rap off of all time and also just SUPER hit it off.

As things fade to credits we hear them being all, hey you look kinda familiar youre sure this is the first time we met right? yeah, think id all remember a motherfucker….

(and then the last camera shot is something is knocked off a counter in their wake and that hits a spray bottle which rolls across the hallway… and a creepy noise plays because that is the rule on how to end a movie like this)

Eridan/Jake

1. I am not sure if I have thoughts on Eridan/Jake, but the possibility of Grandpa seducing ancient Beforus Eridan (in homestuck + its game Old Man Jake has so many portals why NOT to Beforus) is both logistically defensible and very funny.

2. Jake is sad and lonely and really misses his good buddy Erisolsprite and decides to track down Erisol's component pieces in the dreambubbles. Sollux, wisely, continues to desire no part of the situation. But Eridan, on finding a guy who WANTS him around, gets really clingy about it (do not believe his posturing otherwise)

He offers to mentor Jake in the Way Of Hope and despite Jake being a god tier achiever and Eridan being a mortal ghost Jake is like, yes sure that makes sense, maybe if i knew more stuff about my powers i wouldn't be a miserable wreck right now, teach me up.

So Jake learns cool shit about weaponizing Hope, but mostly (through Eridan's whiny self pity) he learns that he is not the worst person ever at interpersonal relationships. It puts his friendship errors in perspective, and he even offers Eridan some advice in that department! Which makes Jake feel mature and wise but otherwise does not do shit 'cause ghosts can't change.

Is there a more poignant moirallegiance tragedy in all troll literature? i doubt it.

But then in the end there is an empty green sprite kernel from an unused timeline and Jake invites Eridan to return to being his prescribed guide in the sort-of-living world, and Eridan accepts.

(This is a very weird basis for a relationship from a human POV but neither notices.)

#gamzee makara #dave strider #jake english #eridan ampora

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ebongawk · 1 month

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for heart begins to beat, 3, 4, 14

omg 🥺🥺 thank you for asking about my undead babies 🖤 heart begins to beat:

3. what's your favorite line of narration? omg ok maybe it's out of pocket but writing from Vecna's perspective near the end of the story was SO weird and gross and cool:

All it took was one child – one nearly as feared as he – to become the catalyst. To upend the carefully structured monotony derived from people playing with chemical compounds they did not comprehend. The correct composition may have given them the army they so desired. Alas… They constructed a most gorgeous explosion instead. And he may have been the bomb, but she was the fire he needed to spark his wick to life.

4. what's your favorite line of dialogue? I'm gonna post like a whole lil section from the second chapter and I don't want to be called out about it:

“I’m glad you did, Eddie,” she said, unable to keep the hitch from her voice. “I’m glad you lived.” When he finally, finally met her gaze, the well of sadness painted behind his chocolate brown irises was ancient. As deep and unending as the eyes she was forced to face every day. The stare she couldn’t stand for more than a second. The stranger in her mirror drawn in midday pastels across another person’s face. Across Eddie’s face. Squeezing her hand in turn, he rasped, “That makes one of us, Cunningham.”

14. is there anything you wanted readers to learn from reading this fic? yeah I wanted you all to know that I'm a better writer than the Duffer bros - not that that's saying much - and that canon is shit (no but honestly, the entire point of this story was to explore the emotional roller coaster that is grief. the way it presents itself as hideous monsters hidden within dark, demented dreams. the guilt of being a survivor when maybe you shouldn't have, and the emotional transformation these difficulties put people through.)

fanfic ask meme!

#hellcheer #eddissy #eddie x chrissy #chrissy x eddie #stranger things #eddie munson #my writing #chrissy cunningham #ask meme #heart begins to beat #cunninghamchrissie #ebongawk ask #vecna #vecna stranger things

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jlhynde-insanitybrilliance · 1 year

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I feel like I missed something. is teddy lupin gonna show up??? how/why???? is he gonna recognize harry as his younger self and be like "yo pops why you chilling with babymort?"?? cause that's fucking hilarious oh my god. oh my god the absolute shit that would occur!

something that comes to mind is if tedward shows up, will harry try to explain their relationship??

♡

tom: who the fuck is this?

theo: oh no

harry: he's my godson

teddy: Hey dad

tom: HE'S LITERALLY AS OLD IF NOT OLDER THAN YOU WHAT DO YOU MEAN???

harry: well-

♡

anyways, I absolutely love your work and I visit your blog all the time to check out your funny lil memes of your fic LMFOAOAOAK

This ask is hard to answer without giving away spoilers, so all I can say is Oh-oh-oh, It’s time magic, ya know? Like if ghosts are disappearing & parts of citrus fruits are being projected into different realities, then people would also find themselves stumbling from 2008 Hogwarts to 1944 Hogwarts with no idea how they got there!

Ultimately, Teddy will be showing up because I want to include him in this fic because putting a metamorphmagus into a time travel AU involving alternate realities is like having a Swiss Army knife in your back pocket. Like it’s so versatile from a writing perspective because I can put him almost anywhere.

*Teddy Lupin’s future in UDLTTOM*

However in answer to the question: Does he recognize Harry? The answer is no. At least not at first. Harry immediately recognizes him on sight because Teddy disappears from his reality a few short months after Harry does & looks just like he remembers, but as far Teddy knows everyone thinks Harry died. (They didn’t find a body, but there was still a funeral.) And the physical changes that Harry went through from being a almost 30 yrold man to a scrawny teenager would be drastic enough that if someone hadn’t known him at that age, they probably wouldn’t have recognized him.

Teddy: But you can’t be Harry…Harry’s old—

*Harry arches eyebrow*

Teddy: –er. Older.

Harry: You think I’m old?

I think Teddy’s about 11 or 12 when he meets up with Harry & you can imagine that Tom & Co. are confused AF. Because this kid comes outta nowhere, he’s a metaphormagus, Harry’s super attached & over protective of him, & then they learn he’s somehow Harry’s godson? Like how?? As far as they can tell there’s max 4 yr age difference between them. They keep try to add together 2 plus 2 & keep getting WTF 😂

Of course, Tom will inevitably try to use Teddy as a means to get close to/ manipulate Harry—Which will ultimately lead to a big blowout in Slytherin House.

#udlttom #spoilers maybe?#harry potter #time travel au #tomarry #tom riddle #tomarry fanfic #teddy lupin #answered ask #metamorphmagus #Teddy Lupin aka Swiss Army knife of udlttom #knights of walpurgis

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yournightowl · 2 months

Text

Your NightOwl #049

You would think that there was a big shift in how people talked about "medications not prescribed to you by your doctor" after the big decriminalization push.

You would think.⸜( ´ ꒳ ` )⸝

But that's not what i see, looking over the records. There's a little bump on the heart monitor, yeah. For a while after the Big Bill passed in 61, there was definitely an uptick in memes about it.

But people got used to the new paradigm pretty fast. All the anger they used to direct towards big government or the cops over who was telling them what they could or couldn't put in their bodies (´ ε´ )-

That all got redirected to their insurance companies, telling them what they could or couldn't expect help paying for. ヾ(ヘ´)ﾉﾞ Insurance is designed to suit peoples needs- the need for a car, or a house, or to not die waiting for a space in the emergency room. Recreational drugs are just that- recreational. Not needed.

So good luck getting the megs to lend you so much as a nickel.(￣▽￣*)ゞ (A nickel is 0.05 USD, not adjusted for inflation. If you think that's bad, look up what a Penny is (￢_￢;))

But insurance is just one half of the deal; the other part's getting your doctor to sign on. People who were used to just being able to pay a dealer for what they want had to learn how to convince their doctor that what they wanted was valid. o(TヘTo) And not everyone's gonna be good at making that argument.

People hate megs, and hate insurance companies especially- but they're faceless to a fault. You communicate with them through messages and phonelines and arbitration that feels damn near litigation. Your doctor? That's just a person. Someone who at some point has to meet face to face with you, usually twice a year, and put a stethoscope on your chest. A mere person like that is easy to take your frustrations out on.

(ノ°益°)ノ If you swing your fist, you might actually hit them.

Fortunately for us all, doctor-patient-confidentiality rarely comes to blows (ha-ha) Because wherever there's a gap in the open market You can count on the black market to step in (￢‿￢ )

So nowadays, unless your drug of choice was invented in a lab last week, you probably don't have to worry about getting arrested over it But you do have to worry about some pharmaceutical meg hiring a security firm to push out your supplier For cutting into their territory ┬┴┬┴┤(･_├┬┴┬┴

micro-dosing on perspective, your nightowl

#unfiction

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gubbles-owo · 6 months

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the oc ask meme,,, urchin, mantis,,

13 & 19 for both,,,, please,,

13. How do they deal with pain (physical or emotional)? Oh Mantis can take one hell of a beating, physically. She may stand at a breathtakingly steep... 152cm tall (on her toes), but true to her real life animal counterpart (the mantis shrimp!), she packs one hell of a punch. Doesn't bruise easily. The real hard hits will still get through to her though. Tries to act all tough but you can clearly see through the act. "Yeah, I'm fine!! ow fuck shit ouch Never felt better!! >:D" Emotional pain... similar response. Seems fairly resilient, but she's not very good at hiding it when something's wrong. Either she'll deny it, or downplay its effects, only admitting with a strong enough confrontation, or an emotional pain too great to bear. Takes a lot to break her. Urchin on the other hand... ho boy. So physical pain. Fun fact, Urchin is ✨ chronically ill! ✨ Just imagine like, hundreds of thousands of little spines all over your body that you can retract at will. Now imagine you don't have much direct control over them, and instead seem to be a more reactionary response of the automatic nervous system-- at least to the best of your knowledge. Now imagine all those little spines are ever so slightly misaligned with where they're supposed to come out! Congratulations, u experience chronic debilitating pain!! So yeah, given the magnitude and agonizing breadth to which their illness pans out, Urchin has some incredible fuckin' pain tolerance. Winces, deals with it in the ways they've learned how to over the years, though it ultimately results in them not getting around much. Mostly solitude, sedentary. Not out of choice, of course. They're afraid of getting too close to anyone else, physically or emotionally, and accidentally harming them with their own stupid sickly spines. Additional pain-- that is, from outside the body-- tends to throw them off kilter, upset the ANS, and resultingly make the internal pain worse. Fun! As for emotional pain... ouhhf... let's just say Urchin has a lot of baggage, and lots of alone time to ruminate on it all :3c 19. How do they connect with the people around them? Love language, how they offer comfort, etc.

Mantis (similarly to Cuttle) loves meeting new folks, but is probably not quiiite as charismatic. Her love language is typically intense/loud, but it can take more subtle forms as well. For example, Shrimps loves challenging those she loves, both in friendly competition and in their own assumptions, in the interest of spurring some sort of growth or new perspective. She will (lightly (for a mantis shrimp)) punch ur shoulder and u will like it. Contrast that with the little things... like, okay, let's not mince words here: Mantis can be absolutely oblivious. Many things tend to sail clean over her head. No thoughts, head empty. However! She will notice little things about you. Your shuffles and posture adjustments. The way you fidget with certain objects. The one or two particular photos or memorabilia tacked to your bedroom wall. Small things that often draw your attention or otherwise indicate where your mind might be at. And often she'll make lil gestures that demonstrate such fine observations. Like "Hey Urchin, I notice you kinda nervously tap your keyboard when you're at your desk, so here's a matching keycap that i affixed to a lil box, so you have something to keep in your pocket when you're elsewhere!" I wonder how she got so selectively observan- autism its definitely the autism On the other hand, Urchin... has an extremely difficult time figuring out just how to connect with those around them. Can I hide in my room? No, we're out of the apartment. Can I run off to some other room where I can close a door, or get some space to myself? No, s-so I really have to stand here around these other people? ...shit. Um. How do interact. Is my presence bothering them. What if I say something rude or insensitive. What if they bring up something upsetting or triggering. How do I get out of here. Fuck. It's no secret that Urchin does not hold themselves in very high regard, so how is it that someone else could love them? They must be manipulating someone in order for them to express such feelings... right? Throughout their life, their presence has ranged from passive lack-of-existence to "burden". They do not know how to properly express love. They do not know how to give comfort. They don't know how to interact with anyone without believing they are causing harm in some way. So how the hell do they communicate with another person when they're slapped in the same room together? Simple: avoidance, social awkwardness, and constant self-doubt. Hope this helps!! :3c

#oc #urchin #mantis #uhh cuttleverse? augh no that sounds absurd #obligatory railgun mention play my game ig #gotta make another oc gaem...#gub #ask

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minumi-chan · 10 months

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Let's do, for the ask game... 22, 32, 37, 51? You can pick and choose as you wish tho <3 There's no pressure to answer all of those!

Hee hee!! Let'sa go!! (Ask meme questions here)

22. Are there certain types of writing you won’t do? (style, pov, genre, tropes, etc)

I've tried my hand a several styles over the years to explore, learn, grow and find my preferred methods. The thing that I consistently try to stay away from is 1st person POV. I just find it so hard to maintain, and I dislike the limited perspective of only that character's viewpoint. I used to write a lot of horror and I do not now because it's not healthy for me anymore.

32. Name three of your favorite fanfic writers.

Only three??? Fuck...... I'm going to stick with my current hyperfixation, TMNT (Mainly Rise) Okay, let's go //cracks knuckles// I'm picking three writers that have consistently made me bawl my eyes out to the point of running out of tissues. I'm gonna be brave and @ people.

@taizi -- Holy shit, some of the most beautiful, heartfelt, emotional, family centric TMNT fic you will find out there. Gawd. Every story Taizi has ever written has brought me to tears. I love 2012 TMNT family because of Taizi's work. And the most recent ROTTMNT stories are just-- I want to hug them to my chest if that makes sense? Go read everything they have ever written, you will not regret it. Bring tissues.

@last-hourglass -- If you have not read Last Grain of Sand in the Hourglass, then please come sob with me over the way Teej so beautifully writes the Rise!family fighting their way to each other and a happy ending. My GAWD the way my emotions have been trampled by this fic. Also Teej makes INCREDIBLE art pieces to go with the story. Brilliant storyteller and artist. //throws a million roses their way

@bluepeachstudios -- Ame is a prolific TMNT writer with so many amazing stories OMGAWD!! I am currently absolutely completely intensely enamored by all things Ghost in the Shell. If you love 2003!Don, THEN OH BOY YOU'RE IN FOR A HEARTBREAKING TREAT!! 8DD But what I love about the story is that there is also healing, and family, and learning to trust again, to love again, to recover from and grow through the hurt. Ghost's history is a fantastical fiction, but the way Ame writes his struggles is so raw and real, and I will forever be crying for my favorite peepaw in the multiverse, Big Papa aka Gogo aka Casper aka Ghost, and rooting for his happy ending. I trust in Ame to give us that in the end. Please also come sob with me over Ghost's stories if you have not already tried them.

37. How do you choose where to end a chapter?

Depending on the story style, I try to choose an impactful moment for the ending. Sometimes that means a cliffhanger if it's the continuous style of story. Others it's trying to find an emotional beat to leave the reader on, especially if the chapter is more self-contained kind of moment. I focus on how the ending line feels a lot, so the chapter closes with a specific emotion evoked.

51. What’s your total AO3 word count?

I had never looked at this before this ask! Apparently it's: 160,872 words 😯

#minu loves tmnt #rottmnt #fic rec #ask meme

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csmeanerr · 6 months

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For the love of god don’t post if anon fails but with regards to the creative red stuff I see where they’re coming from with pronouns. As a trans person myself I get verbal abuse daily from my immediate family who use it/its pronouns to degrade me because they think being transgender is “bullshit made up by people online” and just a phase I’m going through. I’ve had psychiatric appointments, medical counseling and therapy, and even had a psychiatric report diagnosing me with gender dysphoria among other mental illnesses to prove this is actually affecting my daily life.

When my psychiatrist talked to my parents about family counseling to help them understand my trans identity, my parents took me away from the psychiatrist for “enabling my delusions”. They throw out my opposite gendered clothing, they constantly raid my room looking for anything I’m hiding, and they make it a point to antagonize me by using the wrong pronouns because “if you’re not going to accept you’re born a girl and are a girl then you don’t deserve to be called anything.” Being referred to as it/its is incredibly dehumanizing and degrading and I don’t care if someone wants to be referred to that way, I don’t have it in me to strip a person of their status as a living being and demean them by addressing them like an inanimate object. It’s so uncomfortable and stressful and it feels awful.

I struggle heavily with nounself/emoji/neopronouns too because of my mental illnesses and learning disabilities since they break sentence structure and don’t flow properly or they have varying pronunciations/uses and it’s difficult to remember how things work. I wouldn’t interact with people either if I can’t address them in a way I can understand because if I mess up it’s going to be the end of my social life since me messing up is going to get me labeled as a bigot or a LGBTphobic jerk when I’m not. There is truth to them being rehashed “attack helicopter” memes too which ARE harmful to the trans community.

You might think your pronouns are easy to understand and not hurting anyone but that’s not true. They are. They’re not guaranteed to be easily understandable to every other person. You’re actually just complicating things more and giving other neurodivergent people an even harder time than they might already be having, which makes the situation and stress worse.

I’m sorry to add to this topic mod but this is a matter that personally affects me every day and it hurts a lot. I have a mental wellness clinic appointment in the new year to find a therapist and my family has already said they’ll call the cops and report my car as stolen if they believe I’m going to the appointment to discuss my trans identity issues or seeking aid with transitioning. The reason they think it’s all fake bullshit is because people claim being trans is a choice and they’ve seen the emoji/nounself/neopronouns and they don’t believe in it. My psychiatric report that I brought home was even shredded and thrown out because it used my preferred name and pronouns and thus was “filled with bullshit”. I know that I’m not the only one negatively affected by these things either.

post related

nope fuck off your issues does not allow you to invalidate other people and misgender them in turn. it/it may be dehumanizing to you but to someone else might be exactly what they want to be called, same as you want your own pronouns acknowledged.

the fact you go on an entire spiel of how much your family thinks you're full of bullshit and then turn around and say other's pronouns are "attack helicopter" memes is a bigoted take. in short it basically reads: my gender identity is valid but yours aren't

and you sure did type out that the only reason you hide these insanely awful takes is solely to keep your social standing and not that you actually give a fuck about changing your perspective because clearly you don't think other neurodivergents might experience themselves differently or deserve to be respected for those choices

every reason you brought up has been an issue for YOU that YOU are then making OTHERS put above their own validation for YOURSELF.

just fuck off. use people's fucking pronouns it's not that fucking hard to not be a complete shithead. the LGTBQA+ umbrella is larger than you think and you don't get to draw a line of what is or isn't under that umbrella. it's for all of us. stop being selfish.

#creativered #succubuns

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9w1ft · 10 months

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the "gatekeep" anon here!

i fully agree with your response, please never apologise for going on tangents because i'm always intrigued to hear more of your perspective & insight!

i recall the influx of kaylors specifically during the midnights era — the memes were hilarious, but you can tell that things can go wrong and disrupt the flow of the river when people start going about kaylorism the wrong way: expecting taylor and/or karlie to come out, spamming karlie's instagram with taylor references, etc. — such actions that put the two in an uncomfortable spot.

being a gaylor or kaylor is not at all easy to say the least. while it's up to people how they want to approach this community with what sort of goals, i personally spectate the chaos unfold like a scholar or an archaeologist examining traces of history left by our ancestors to get a glimpse into their life rather than a tv show viewer rooting for the couple to end up together or a detective wanting to catch the culprit; for me, as a kaylor & gaylor, it's much easier for me and on my mental health & day-to-day life to engage with this community through the lens of what the past has to tell us rather than speculating what will happen in the future. spares you a lotta heartbreak, i learned the hard way.

there's no "right" or "wrong" way to be a gaylor as long as you're respectful to everybody involved. regardless of how the folklore deepens in the mainstream media, i will always appreciate us 22 kaylors on tumblr having something special to cherish :)

aww thanks anon! i do love to answer asks like this so thank you to you and everyone for sending them ☺️

i think there are many people who have taken a similar approach to you in terms of how to interact with or engage with kaylor and i think can be a really effective approach. i think that, maybe there was a time or era for taylor where she might have been specifically angling towards some sort of big goal, and while maybe she still is in some capacity, she is simply in a different season of life now and i have been trying to give her evolving approach to celebrity more grace and acknowledgment.

😆 i’ve definitely learned the hard way too, but, i think it gives some of us unique insight.. informs our perspective. i hope to grow with taylor and karlie.

you know, i remember at the beginning of her surprise song speech on glendale night one, before mirrorball, taylor talked about how she craves our (the audience’s) love and i thought about mastermind and the line “no one wanted to play with me as a little kid so i’ve been scheming like a criminal ever since to make them love me and make it seem effortless” and i remember thinking, i think part of easter egging and getting us to look and laugh at her is notably important to her, but how that must be getting increasingly harder as the world has become more and more volatile at the same time as she has taken on more and more personal and weighty and complex goals..

during anti-hero, when she walked right in front of where pro and i were standing, my schemes of making my eye sign wink at her melted and my cellphone dropped and all i wanted to do was reach out to her in that moment and tell her, i love you unconditionally. and i wanted to tell her that i don’t ever want her to think that she needs to give us consistency or clarity in order for us to want to stick around. of course, it was only a few precious seconds so… all that happened is we both got to sing “i’m the problem it’s me” to one another but… in some weird way it felt like the epitome of it. of all this. to be able to smile and laugh and say, hey, we’re not perfect but we both know it. why not make a lark of it?

i know the symbolism of the taylor on the big screen screaming to be noticed and how it represents this idea of taylor the presenter being focused on while taylor the gay person couldn’t been bigger yet gets ignored time and time again, and i get that and i agree with that, i think that’s very much her intention. but there was something about being present for the physically real taylor in that moment, trying to be every version of herself at once, that i’ve tried to keep in my mind when thinking about how i want to kaylor going forward.

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amarguerite · 1 year

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Salut Margz, hope all lies well. I've been re-reading A Monstrous Regiment--it's bringing me a lot of comfort these days bc job is stressful--and I am wondering what the dragons of the division think of each other. Does Laconia think Wollstonecraft is stodgy and tiresome? Does Attia think Laconia is too snooty and does she seek comfort with Antiope? Do all the dragons think Attia is just a lil bit dumb? Happy to get your perspective if you feel up to it!!

Thanks! Still working through some creative burnout and some stressful IRL stuff but it is getting better! I hope your job gets less stressful soon!!

Re: the dragons in the division- everyone respects Antiope very much, and is very impressed by her age and service, but Wollstonecraft often and very disapprovingly thinks that Antiope is a very solid sort of fighter. It’s a way of daintily condemning with praise someone Wollstonecraft believes is getting a little too old for the field of battle and who should not be put in situations where she would have to think for herself. Attia is very fond of Antiope and loves hearing her stories of the olden days and often turns to her for company or comfort. Laconia shares Wollstonecraft’s opinion on Antiope, and often, privately thinks that while Attia’s good at following orders, and Wollstonecraft is a very shrewd and reliable regimental leader, she, Laconia, is the best fighter in the entire regiment. Laconia finds the ferals to be a daily annoyance, but would only gripe about it to her Captain.

Attia is often intimidated by Laconia but trusts Laconia implicitly to make the right calls or to get them out of any tight spots or trouble. Attia adores Wollstonecraft but is too timid to say much to that extent- the fear of disappointing so self-controlled and masterful a dragon looms very large in her thoughts. She likes the ferals and as she’s the youngest of the big dragons, would very much like to join in their games, but she would dream of intruding if she isn’t wanted and the ferals are too self-centered to realize she’d like to join in a game of trick-the-cheese-away-from-the-guest.

Antiope looks very indulgently upon all the little whippersnappers in her regiment, but is fondest of Attia. She is often amused at Laconia’s dash and drive, and often thinks to herself that Wollstonecraft would really be a better companion if she learned to enjoy life a little more. But she is glad to work with all of them and as the largest and oldest dragon there, has no complaints about her position or the respect she is shown from the others. (The ferals don’t bother her- she thinks of them with amused condescension. They are all just BABIES. How charming of them, learning to fight!)

Wollstonecraft is largely very pleased by her regiment because it is very balanced. Attia’s timidity counteracts Laconia’s moments of Charge-of-the-light-brigade rushes into danger. The chaos of the ferals balances the dependable solidity of Antiope. Everyone obeys her orders to the best of their ability. However, she privately thinks that Attia needs to come out of the shell, Laconia needs a lesson in thinking before acting, Antiope needs to consider retirement, and the ferals all need their own individual captains to civilize them. She is closest to Laconia, because she and Laconia both think they are the best fighter in the regiment and enjoy judging other captains and dragons as inferior.

The ferals are like that Don Draper meme— they don’t really think of the big dragons at all, unless forced to. Then they respect the big dragons for their treasures and will do what they say if sufficiently bribed or bellowed into it.

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pageofheartdj · 1 year

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Kid has been isolated to only have Belos's company for 400 years, was betrayed, and now seems to be living in the moment to avoid going down a trauma spiral. It's entirely possible Collector, in an attempt to protect his own psyche, is subconsciously ignoring the signs and feeling of Belos because that means they aren't completely free of him, and might never be free of him from their perspective since if Belos can survive being turned into goop, what else can they do? A lot actually but trauma is cruel like that. Especially regarding a long term abuser like Belos.

Hell, what Belos did to Collector was trauma bonding, which trust me is a lot less innocent than it sounds. Basically through a careful balance of abuse, manipulation and gaslighting, love bombing (which can seem to be platonic like saying your friends), criticism, making the victim trust and dependant on you, making the victim give up and resign, lose themself, and become addicted to the cycle the victim becomes dependent on the abuser.

And from what we've seen of Belos and Collector's dynamic, this definitely seems to be a text book case of trauma bonding.

Oh I like the idea of them 'living in the moment'!

I already hc them bascially being 'This is fine' meme with supressing everything about his titan friends being killed, being ostracized by collectors, being in isolation and then being with Belos and being betrayed by Belos. And they are a kid, literally how they would even process this! Honestly, if not for King, he would probably lash out all his confusing and painful feelings. But with King, either this is a good thing or not, he just pushes everything away and tries to relive his old days playing with baby titans.

Like, I doubt the show will touch so much, only his parallels to Luz and trusting again in people. But we can always headcanon more!!

Oh this is interesting! I need to read more into this!

But yes whatever the relationship were with Collector, they could not be healthy. I kinda want to see more, how did Belos treated them in the beginning? It must have been different, to learn more about them, how to use them in the best way, to establish a dynamic with them where he can take the most and control them.

And after all he doesn't treat him the same way all the time. Before Hunter brought the key Belos was somewhat nice with him, smiling at him and entertaining his little games. But in the end Belos is cold with Collector, he doesn't smile at him, he even lashes out, trying to hit him or the place where his shadow was(he is used to lash out at kids when he is frustrated). I would have assumed this is because Belos doesn't have a need in them anymore. So even though he keeps the lie that he will free them, he doesn't play along anymore. But Collector doesn't look suprised at his behaviour, he knows how to talk with Belos when he is like that. When Belos is pleasant, Collector jokes around, but when Belos is not, Collector is mean with him.

So this means that's the normal cycle with them?

And how often Belos utilised covering their tablet? Collector felt confident enough to freely mock him. And Belos let him. Great, so now Belos taught/reinforced? them to be mean but also adjust themself to whatever mood his 'friend' had just fucking jhsghf

#the owl house #toh spoilers #toh #the collector #toh belos #philip wittebane

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waitmyturtles · 2 years

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as someone on the spectrum, the miscommunications, the WY’s shutdown during break up and JH’s reaction in this past episode were all very on point to real life. I relate to the struggle of navigating a relationship especially the 1st one. Being able to be in a relationship on the spectrum is really difficult and we may hurt people while figuring it out, then learn from it as everyone has to. I just wanted to put this out there bc I see ppl saying her walking off and not answering directly is not in character and also I have seen stuff like autistics will be direct and say it. And I feel like no, not all autistics feel comfortable being direct bc of fear even tho the result of not being direct ends up with how JH reacted (although he needs to work on his communication too, it’s a two way street as I think that saying goes).

Firstly: anon, I am so thankful and touched that you wrote this to me in response to my posts. I am honored you see this space as one that’s safe for your thoughts. I have been following the #actually autistic tag for EAW thoughts and reviews: as a person working in social services, the reflections of those on the spectrum are incredibly important and educational — and, to your point, VALID.

Anon, I agree with you. I’m seeing in the reviews a lot of denial in regards to the plot. Seeing Young-woo and Jun-ho break up is upsetting! And I think some folks are rationalizing what happened in their own interpretations.

“Knowing” how to behave or react in emotionally complicated situations is not inherently easy or natural for people — regardless if one is on the spectrum or not. While our Western culture seems open to emotional exploration and revelation, I would argue that there are a great many cultural obstacles that actually hinder people from engaging in deep self reflection over the course of their lives. Despite meme platitudes about “finding joy” or “finding yourself” that one sees on social media, I think Western society doesn’t actually feel comfortable in someone publicly engaging in their full range of emotions. Emotions are messy! Anger, sadness, hurt — these emotions can make others feel unsettled, and I think Western culture is actually not as open to seeing them out in the open as society seems to indicate. We see this very often particularly in family structures that restrict emotional outpourings, where parents keep their children from openly feeling what they’re going through. Those restrictions will stay with those children through their adulthood.

(I’m saying Western culture because I am assuming that’s the majority lens we’re seeing here on Tumblr.)

So, to the point that Young-woo couldn’t respond to Jun-ho — I can see that authenticity making people feel wiggly. And angry, even.

I think the writers have kept incredibly close to what you are describing as an authentic emotional experience on the spectrum — these are similar experiences I heard reflected from ASD clients when I was in grad school. Your mind goes blank. Conjuring words is impossible.

Sometimes, in those moments, silence is the best response FOR YOU, because that is authentic FOR YOUR LIFE AND EXPERIENCE. No one should ever take that away, especially in reviews of a television show.

Anon, I also agree with you about Jun-ho. I’ve wondered before if I’m placing a Western bias burden on his character to be more communicative in the face of Young-woo’s emotional growth. But he’s done a beautiful job before with Young-woo, through empathy, to explain his feelings. I think he’ll come around again next week.

I want to thank you again for sharing, because your perspective is VALID. Your words mean a lot to me — thank you.

#extraordinary attorney woo #extraordinary attorney woo meta

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