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poetrysmackdown · 5 months

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some informal thoughts

hello! hope the holiday season has been kind to all of you. and i hope all my jewish followers had a lovely hanukkah! anyways, since i said a few months ago that i’d pick poetry smackdown back up sometime around this time of year, i thought i should make a post. the gist of it is that i’m still quite busy, i have a break that’s about three weeks shorter than I was planning on, and i don’t currently have the mental bandwidth required to read, contemplate, and sort through poem submissions in a way that does justice to them, even if i were to recruit some friends to help out. since running a tournament format requires at least five weeks of continued engagement once it’s underway, and since i’m not at capacity to offer that right now due to the change in my schedule, i’m gonna have to bow out for now. sad bc i was looking forward to it!

my hope is that i’ll have some more time over the summer to hunker down with it, in which case you’ll be hearing from me. it’ll frankly depend on the kind of job i land in for the summer, but i find that my unemployed spirit can typically keep me doing stupid shit regardless of workload...to a point. i don’t want to make any promises because i don’t want to get anyone’s hopes up just to let them down again LOL. i do admit the amount of exposure the first tournament got has made me feel like more of a perfectionist this time around, doubly because i don’t feel that i’m very suited to being a public online presence (even a relatively quite small one)—i’m bad enough at responding to emails for my own real life responsibilities, let alone tumblr asks for the silly responsibilities i invent for myself lol. that’s not to say i no longer want to do it, or i don’t enjoy it, or even that i don’t feel capable of making a really interesting bracket—just that if i am working to put something new together, and if people are taking the time to submit poems they care about, then i don’t want to half-ass it.

my second admission is something like this. I made the original bracket as a celebration of poetry and our relationships to it. yes it was silly and competitive, and the poems were very tumblr, but still, celebration was the intention—I wanted to have conversations about poetry. I stand by the bracket format as a fun and valuable way to foster conversations about poetry, but truthfully, the poems i’m wanting to have conversations about right now—the poems that we should be talking about right now—are ones that i'm not comfortable putting in a bracket. I reblogged The Baffler’s Poems from Palestine collection on here earlier, and Najwan Darwish’s “Who Remembers The Armenians?”, which I still often find repeating through my head when I'm traveling from one place to another, walking home or riding the bus. I came across this beautiful thread recently where people have been translating Dr. Refaat Alareer’s “If I Must Die” into their own languages (this just makes my translator's heart sing!!!!!!). @havingapoemwithyou has been posting some great poems from and for Palestine as well—check out their tag here.

There's always more to add, and I'll be posting more on here as I come across it, but that's what I feel anyone should be focusing on right now when it comes to poetry. i think poetry can be an escape but it should never be a distraction. does that make sense? i wouldn't be against doing a one-off poll here or there, but it feels weird to be making a tournament for poetry right now, or anytime soon. i feel like what free time i have right now is still best utilized helping my friends with organizing in the real world. and god, a bit off-topic but while I'm talking, fuck poetry foundation—I have so much respect for all the poets keeping up the boycott, because while i think it's a simple decision, it's not always an easy one (Aurielle Lucier discussed that here).

anyways, if you read all of this, thank you for your time!! I could go on and on, but really this was just meant to be a message telling y'all that there won't be another tournament for a while lol. even so i'll be trying to use this small silly platform as best i can until palestine is free because that's the absolute least i can do.

#not a poll #also i'm closing my ask box for now because i know i don't have the bandwidth to answer anything rn. sorry :(#but feel free to reply here with your thoughts and any resources and i'll do my best to respond #or even messages might be fine. something about the ask format just gives me anxiety sometimes lmao #cannot stress this enough i am so so so bad at responding to things #even when i want to or enjoy doing it

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snowbleat · 1 year

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THIS SHEEPY IS CREEEEEEPPPPPYYYYYYYY!!!!!

Me, Sheep, 2023, Mixed Media (Polymer Clay, Air Dry Clay, Modeling Paste, Acrylic Paint, Paint Markers, Embroidery Thread, Clear Gloss, Acrylic Yarn, and Glue mounted on Glass)

i think that's everything anyways...

The only piece mounted on the glass is the brain; all others are individually removable

~more and bigger pictures and reflections under the cut!~

as much as i love the clean glass look, every time i picked it up i had cuts all over my hands so that'll have to be for pictures only LOL. it does look nice in the frame (don't have a picture so you'll have to take my word for it) i just wish it was a bit thinner.

i tried to make it as anatomically correct as possible but 1) i was working on a very strict deadline (one week!), 2) my reference materials weren't the greatest, and 3) it needed to be strong enough to be moved around. mostly the skull is what pisses me off in this regard. i also want to go back and clean up the edges and such at some point. at some point i think i'll buy some heavy duty magnets so the skin and bones and such don't just... slip and slide around. i like the look without them, but i really wanted this piece to be interactive when it's on display next year and that's just not feasible when pieces can fall and such. i was going to do everything that you might see when you cut a sheep in half (do not try this at home!), but i decided that would take the focus away from the nervous system which is what i really wanted to focus on.

in my mind this sheep is still alive and we simply have magical x-ray vision that we use to see through it however i have gone in and tagged it with gore anyways. sorry it took so long!!

i also have work in progress pictures! if you guys want to see them, let me know. i can't add any more photos in this post.

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fentrashcat · 10 months

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So this one took most of May and late June 2023 to complete, and is of course my Unexpectables piece. I'm really proud of how this one turned out, especially being the first big project after a long break.

In this piece, I experimented with using colors for light dynamics, strand count, and using couching stitch for lettering. The close up on Lys shows the coloring the best, with 2 shades of white and 2 shades of gray. The center line of Lys' mask is 6 strands, and the smaller detail lines are done with 4 and 3 strands. Lys' mask was filled with a 2 strand encroaching satin stitch. The aspects' center lines were all done with 4 strands, and the detail lines are 2 strand. The fill on the aspects is a single strand surface satin stitch. I made an attempt of a 12 strand line for Lys' name by double folding the 6 strand floss, but I don't think it translated well. The aspects names are done in 6 strands, all names used 2 strands for the actual couching bits. The line work is all back stitch. All black was done with an 8 weight perle thread which I like for outlining but think is too textured for filling, but I was out of all other black lol. I also attempted to match the name color to the blue that would be on Lys' dice, but unfortunately can't afford said dice atm so I was going off of photos and a blue and white teacup I have, but I think it works pretty well.

I struggled quite a bit with drawing the pattern for this one, probably taking about 2 weeks to get it to a point I liked, and even then I went back and redrew a few of the aspects a few times as well. Tio and Kai were probably the hardest after Lys, as I struggled to imagine them from a head on view. Lys kept looking off to the point I would almost complete the outline, then pull all the stitches in frustration. Eventually I realized why, the official art for Lys is asymmetric, so in trying to make him symmetric it looked wrong. Also occurs to me that my Twitter post with this one may have had a tone problem, as I was kind of sleep deprived when I wrote it 😅. I love Lys' design, which is why it looked so wrong when I tried so hard for symmetry.

I thought about adding Kyr, but was out of my outlining thread. Maybe I'll add him and any other aspects we meet later on, or maybe they will get their own piece🤔.

I already posted this one to Twitter but I was able to include a lot more info and new pictures here, so I am going to tag this one. If that is not okay, just lmk and I can take the tags off 😊

#artwork #embroidery #hand embroidery #the unexpectables #fanart #trashcatsews

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misfits-of-zaun · 1 month

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Munday writing detail meme

Repost, don't reblog.

Feel free to edit/add your own parts!

Name: Cónan

Age range: under 18 | between 18 and 25 | 25 and older

Pronouns: they/them

Random fact about me: I really enjoyed Fallout 4 and I'm looking forward to the live-action show being released this month 👀

When it comes to planning threads: I like to wing it completely | I like to plan the start of the thread | I like to plan several key points in the thread | I like to plan every reply | It depends

Pre-established relationships between muses: I enjoy them | I like them occasionally but mostly prefer to play the relationship out | I don't do pre-established relationships

When it comes to replies, I like to: Keep mine short (1-2 paragraphs) | Keep mine to medium length (3 - 6 paragraphs) | Keep my replies long (7+ paragraphs) | It depends

I generally try to reply in: 1 day | 3 days | A week | Within a month | More than a month

I like getting asks for memes I reblogged a long time ago: Yes* | No | Depends

*There's no time limitation on any rp ask memes I've ever reblogged - if you see a rp meme I reblogged seven years ago and you like it, you can send me an ask for it. Just link to whichever meme it's from so that I know the context haha.

I like getting random IC asks from my mutuals: Yes | No | Depends*

*You can send asks, just provide context or be willing to discuss potential scenarios, please, so I know the angle to take with my reply!

I like getting tagged in unplanned starters from my mutuals: Yes | No | Depends*

Is the starter idea based off anything we've discussed before? Is the starter based off a scenario wishlist post you saw I made/a rp prompt I reblogged once? If so, go for it. If not, just pop me a DM and say "hey, I had an idea about X scenario and figured it would be fun to do a thread for it with our characters, would you be down if I wrote up a starter/sent you this meme?"

I like getting getting OOC asks from my mutuals to plan our threads: Yes!* | No | Depends

*(I absolutely love discussing thread ideas and planning things out. Please share your thoughts, don't be afraid to assert your preferences and make suggestions - frankly there is nothing better to me than someone who knows what they want and is keen to collaborate with me to create a fun story we both enjoy!)

I like getting getting OOC asks from my mutuals just to chat about things not related to RP: Yes | No | Depends

I enjoy writing: angst, hurt/comfort, adventure, post-apocalyptic/dystopian AUs, Modern AUs, What-If Scenarios/canon-divergent AUs, crossovers, dark themes, complex relationship dynamics, NSFW themes, slow burns, long term plotlines exploring how adversity drives character development (for better or worse), plotted threads, novella threads

I don't enjoy writing: slice of life, fluff, short-form/rapid-fire rps, sweet wholesome romances with no conflict or wider storyline, Canon x OC romances, improv threads with no OOC communication

My favourite tropes are: redemption arcs, corruption arcs, power struggles, found family, childhood friends to enemies, enemies to lovers, fake relationships, mutual pining, enemies forced to work together

Opinion on shipping (for a specific character or in general): Anyone can ship whatever they want and write whatever they want, I don't care lol. Romance isn't one of my primary interests when it comes to RPing, but if a character dynamic has interesting potential, and someone proposes a compelling plot idea, I'll give a ship a go

¯\ _(ツ)_/¯

I get inspired to write by doing this: listening to music, reading, watching TV, playing video games, discussing headcanons and AU ideas OOC

One of my favourite threads/drabbles/etc:

This thread from Game Of Diplomacy AU* remains to be one of my favourite things I've ever written. It has a high stakes power struggle with tension you can cut with a knife, it has angst and conflict with counterbalancing moments of levity, it is deliciously dark and the clever verbal sparring challenged me in a really refreshing way, keeping me on my toes. I think it contains some of my best writing to date.

*This AU gained a surprisingly big following - it even has its own fanart! Years later my writing partner and I still get occasional asks about it/people still go on like sprees through the threads, which is really sweet. I am forever mindblown and deeply touched that so many people have enjoyed this random niche rarepair story my partner and I wrote for fun.

I'm also very proud of this Arcane rp thread, which sparked off a whole AU that my writing partner and I are still actively developing and enjoying two years later.

A writing partner (or partners!) I've enjoyed writing with: shoutout to @f1shbonez for writing with me for ten years, across four different platforms and over 12 different fandoms. You are the best damn writing partner I've ever had, a true unicorn, a plotting genius, a master wordsmith with razor wit - I have grown so much a writer and as a person because of you. We have created so many incredible stories together that I cherish and reread to this day, and I look forward to all the new stories we will create together 💜

A mutual I want to write with but haven't yet: if we're mutuals, suffice to say that I like your writing style and I'm open to writing with you.

I'm not always the best at getting the ball rolling at the beginning (and sometimes I do forget to reply to messages 🙈 please don't think it's you, I just get too embarrassed to reply after I realise I left it too long, I'm so sorry 💀)

But generally speaking, whether we've never spoken or we spoke a bit 7 months ago and things kind of stalled/fizzled out, you’re always welcome to pop me a message and toss a meme in my inbox.

Tagging: you, reading this post right now. Yes, you. You've been officially tagged.

#munday meme #go fill this out and tag me i wanna see your answers!#be proud of your writing ✍️

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multianime · 5 months

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KNOW YOUR ADMIN

Name: Alyssa. But I'll also go by Aly, Lyssa, Lyss. Pronouns: She/Her Comms: You IM me here on Tumblr, but if we're mutuals then feel free to add me on discord if you want it! Name of muse: I have a lot, so I'll go with Izuku Midoriya for this one. Experience in RP: I've been on here for over ten years. Best Experiences: There's so many to name lol. Pet Peeve/Deal Breakers: People clearly not following my rules. If I don't follow back, then im more than likely not feeling the vibe between us. So please dont continue to try. Also people that follow me just to unfollow a second after. Muse Preference (fluff, angst, and smut): I love me some good fluff. But I also love the angst too. Plot or memes: I normally suggest memes. I'm not always the best at having plots right off the bat. Long or short replies: Depends on how I'm feeling at the moment. I typically like longer, but that doesn't mean I won't do shorter threads. Best time to write: I love replying in the morning/afternoon but most of the time I'm replying after work at night. Are you like your muse: I can see a little bit of myself in Izuku. Although I'm definitely not a crier like he can be in the series. (Though we still love him)

tagged by: @detonationking

Tagging: @amischiefofmuses, @utallige, @dalihua, @fromvitya, @whirling-fangs, @ervaurem

#about mun

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conradism · 1 year

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name. steph

pronouns. she/her

preference of communication. tumblr ims/messages, discord eventually.

most active muse. I only have Conrad for now. Sometimes I think that I'll add but I probably will just make a new blog if I do.

experience / how many years. Let's act like it was a normal amount but it might've been since I was 18 on Tumblr. Over 10 years at this point.

platforms you use. Tumblr almost exclusively. I'll act like I'm going to Discord RP and then I don't, I wish I could be better but I simply cannot.

best experience. Met my bestie @kierras on here and when she's in my wedding we are not explaining how we really met. It was just "online idk". But idk this place always keeps me coming back so clearly it's not as bad as I say it is when I'm trying to use Beta editor.

rp pet peeves. Unschockingly I get so frustrated when people hide behind a computer screen to just be a dick. And no, I'm not talking about in-character. I love dick characters. It's when you're sending shitty anons or just talking down to people like we aren't all just on here to like get away from stuff-- I just get so annoyed. If you don't like what someone's doing just like-- don't watch or interact, if it's not hurting anyone, just don't look.

fluff, angst, or smut. I'm an angst girlie, through and through. I will literally write angst until I die. Fluff is cool but I like to build up to it. I tend to angst until we get to the point that fluff feels like a reward LMAO. I don't smut -- unless it's like someone I've known for a long time and even then, it's not something I seek out.

plots or memes. I'm somewhere in between. I like to just kinda go where things take us-- I rarely will plot out a whole thread. It might just be like I'm going to put my char here and by the end they need to kiss. And then we just YOLO. And my fave is when the kiss just didn't even happen because we went rogue. LOL. Memes stress me out sometimes especially with canon chars because I feel like people judge more on them but anyways just ignore my memes, thanks.

long or short replies. if long is 3 paragraphs that's my sweet spot. I'm a one paragraph or three girlie-- rarely 2. @kierras and I have a bad habit of giant ramble threads.

best time to write. Morning before everyone is awake and messaging me. So like 5am-7am. Yes, I know that's weird.

are you like your muses. Conrad is how I sometimes view myself like internally because we both hold a lot in and don't really talk about what's bothering us until we're really upset. But really I'm just a loud and extroverted person who Conrad would be like uhhh about. Heck, I'm more like Belly than Conrad.

tagged by. @kierras tagging. @jaymaybnk @everhearts and honestly whoever wants to do it !!

#; { ABOUT STEPH }

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esmorothfallen · 1 year

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KNOWING YOUR PARTNER WELL CAN POTENTIALLY MAKE WRITING TOGETHER A LOT EASIER. REPOST.

name: color!!

pronouns: she/her

preference of communication: if you have it and you're comfortable adding me, i much prefer talking on discord!! tumblr ims are kind of clunky and hard to deal with imo.

name of muse: simon laurent!

rp experience / how long: i have about twelve years of roleplay experience. i started on roblox when i was around eight, and gradually worked my way up from there. as for tumblr roleplay experience specifically, i don't remember, but probably 5+ years.

best experience: the period when the infinity train rpc was active was my best period for tumblr roleplay, i think. it was a small rpc, but that also made it more chill, and i really enjoyed it. i miss my infinity train rpc mutuals a lot, but i know how it goes. switching to other fandoms, getting too busy, getting burned out on tumblr roleplay. all of that happened to me too.

rp pet peeves / deal breakers: pretty much just what's listed in my rules for deal breakers. for pet peeves, i am a bit of a stickler for grammar, lol. not that big of a deal in the long run, though.

fluff, angst, or smut: okay well first of all i don't do smut at all. i'm majorly uncomfortable with nsfw content in general. with that out of the way though!! my best genre is definitely angst. it doesn't have to be pure angst, mind you. but tooth-rotting fluff is very hard to write for me. albeit i am currently writing a muse that's hard to do that with anyway, so y'know. kind of comes with the territory!! i will do slice of life threads, i've gotten better at those than i used to be, but there's always gonna be some level of angst involved even if it's not the main focus.

plot or memes: i'm down for either, actually! i'm not the best at coming up with ideas, admittedly, so i do struggle a bit with plotting sometimes. but i'm trying!! and i've been doing a little better at it than i was, to the point that i'd actually like to do a little plotting with all of my roleplay partners if we can. at least enough that i have a concrete idea of what kinds of interactions you're interested in. memes as first interactions are fine too, though! just so long as you're comfy with me deciding based on my own discretion what verse to use and other things like that.

long or short replies: on your end or mine? lol. i'll always write at least a paragraph (unless i'm specifically posting a one-line starter), but most times my minimum is 3-4. that said, sometimes i go crazy and write much more, from 11-20 paragraphs. so i'm kind of all over the place there. as for your end, i don't mind how long your reply or starter is, as long as you give me enough to work with! i'm not a stickler for matching length. i also don't force myself to match length exactly if i can't think of anything else to add. i'll never give you a drastically shorter reply, but i won't stress over it if it's a paragraph or two short of yours.

best time to write: ridiculously late o'clock, for some darn reason!!! my writing motivation is ALWAYS the highest right before i go to bed and it drives me absolutely crazy because i don't have time to get anything done. but if i don't finish it and try to go back to it the next day, my motivation is much lower, and i end up staring at it for so long that i start overthinking it and want to rewrite the whole thing. head in hands. i'm such a coherent roleplayer.

are you like your muse: LOL i hope not!!! not this one, anyway. i used to write noelle holiday from deltarune, and i think that's the closest i've ever gotten to really seeing myself in a muse. there's a lot about noelle that i relate to. but simon? no, not really. i just have a thing for complex villains with tragic backstories.

tagged by: @countlessrealities! thank you for the tag! tagging: @dreamsofalife, @cauterisen, @rathalascendant, @rxtroskull! and anyone else who wants to do it.

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chronicowboy · 1 year

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2022 writing review

so its 2023, so what? better to review a year with a little bit of distance methinks

tagged by @kitkatpancakestack hope ur 2023 is going well so far muah <3

1. Number of stories posted to AO3: 42 oh lord

2. Word count posted for the year: 297,700 (mortifying)

3. Fandoms I wrote for: 9-1-1

4. Pairings: buck/eddie

5. Story with the most:

kudos: please? (can't say no) 1,220 kudos

bookmarks: the persistence of memory 386 bookmarks

comment threads: the persistence of memory 119 threads

6. Work I’m most proud of (and why): ooooof i was gonna say the persistence of memory just because of the sheer word count and that i love the story but im actually really proud of my gilmore girls au all you have to do is call my name (i'll be there) because i wrote 40k words in under a week and for once i wasn't wondering about if people would read it i wrote it for me (and my beloved elke) honourable mentions to 1001 reasons to not get drunk with your sister's boyfriend and any of my ravi pov fics because they're silly but i love them all the same and my amnesia collection

7. Work I’m least proud of (and why): hmmm probably we don't go through the glass doors because it was half-formed but i still posted it, i basically just saw that gif of peeta pressing his forehead against the forcefield for katniss in the jabberjay scene and i was like but what if it was buddie and yeah i just do not know why i posted it ig

8. Share or describe a favorite review you received: any comments i've had saying that i should be a writer for the show makes me want to scream such as "this is soooooooooooo good!!!! its so perfectly and wonderfully devastating and heartbreaking and emotional and warm and soft. you write the firefam's dialogue SOOO WELL! they should add you as a staff writer tbh. ❤❤❤❤❤❤" on (tpom surefire way to make me happy is to compliment my dialogue and the 118 dynamics)

9. A time when writing was really, really hard: at the moment tbh i have so much uni work to do and an original piece of fiction im 200+ pages into and i'm trying to do all of that at once so the fic has fallen to the wayside a little

10. A scene or character you wrote that surprised you: god this is really difficult and it definitely doesn't help that i can barely remember anything about my fics but um i guess character-wise its a surprise whenever i write taykay as an actual character rather than just a mention through gritted teeth lol but um scene-wise maybe just my whole albert pov fic what are you doing home? we thought you were babysitting just because its not something i'd normally write (eddie is only mentioned how uncharacteristic of me!!)

11. A favourite excerpt of your writing: oh god um i am so proud of lots of bits to my writing so i'm going to try to limit myself

just all of my surrealism weaved into 9-1-1, what's your fantasy? to kind of hint that buck's dreaming

the realisation scene in flatpack furniture and a djungelskog

"It'll be pretty cool, right?" Eddie's talking, but Buck can barely hear it over the static ringing in his ears. "To look at it and know that we made it together—"

You don't find it, son, you make it.

Its nothing special. Its nothing out of the ordinary.

There's nobody in this world I trust more with my son than you.

There's an Alan key sitting in his open palm, ever so slightly warmed by Eddie's hand.

I know you did.

Its nothing special. Its nothing out of the ordinary.

You two have an adorable son.

Eddie passes him tools at work all the time without him asking. They've suffered the telepathy jokes a million times.

Shouldn't it be when you're at your worst, they're at their worst, you have every reason to give up and you still decide you want to try again.

this scene from the only try day is wednesday because i originally hated this fic until i reread this moment

The picture catches the flames, curling up at the bottom corners, colours melting away and consuming Eddie and Christopher whole before finally, finally taking Buck too.

Because that's the thing. If Eddie is in there, if he's— Then that's what's going to happen. The fire takes Eddie first. Then, Christopher. Christopher who loses two parents and gets stuck with a Buck, a Buck he'll grow to resent because Buck's the reason Eddie was here in the first place, because Buck didn't save Eddie. So, the fire will take Buck finally.

And it will take him violently. It will ravage him, turn him to ash and sift it through their fingers until he's nothing but a few chunks of burnt bone. It will take him, consume him, ruin him. And he'll be dead, in every way that counts. He's already dying now.

Buck refuses to let it happen.

He'll die. He'll die before Chris can resent him because that would finish him off. Losing Christopher, losing Christopher to hatred and loathing, that would kill him. And that death would be much more violent than any chaos fire could wreak.

this scene in memory (all alone in the moonlight)

"Eddie, can we not do this?" Sighing, Buck looks up at the ceiling. "I'm missing five years of my life. I feel like shit. I really don't need you coming in here acting all weird."

Eddie lets out a breath and takes a step forward.

"What do you need from me, Buck?"

And, fuck, that question really shouldn't bring tears to his eyes, but. But Buck's spent his whole life being the one asking that question and now he doesn't even know the person who knows him well enough to ask it.

"I need my best friend." He whispers.

Eddie's face crumbles and he crosses the space between them in three steps, settling onto the edge of the bed and pulling Buck into his chest. Buck clutches at his Henley as he tries to compose himself, but Eddie's hand settles heavy at the base of his skull.

"Hey, don't do that." Eddie murmurs. "Just let it go, Buck."

And so, Buck breaks—for the second time in as many days—in a relative stranger's arms.

Eventually, when the tears have subsided and Buck finds the energy to be embarrassed about dirtying Eddie Diaz's shirt with snot and tears, he sits back in his bed and scrubs at his face.

"Thanks." He rasps.

"You don't have to thank me for that, Buck." Eddie offers him a cup of water and a handful of tissues. "I know you don't remember it, but we promised to have each other's backs and I don't plan on breaking that anytime soon."

"Fuck." Buck wipes at his eyes with the tissues until Eddie pries it from his hand and takes over for him, soft and gentle enough to have the tears springing to life all over again. "I really want to hate you." Eddie laughs.

12. How did you grow as a writer this year: honestly just sheer volume of writing, for most of my writing life i was always so perfectionist and adamant that i couldn't move on until this one project was polished and perfect but this year i've written and written and written and let myself abandon projects and have rough first drafts yknow

13. How do you hope to grow next year: hmm idk really maybe just write even more and branch out a little in what i'm writing

14. Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer, beta, cheerleader, etc): @danielsousa my love, my heart, my rock!!!!! honestly probably wouldn't have written half as much if it weren't for elke cheering me on for the gilmore girls au and sending me screenshots of my writing that made her want to kill me

15. Anything from your real life show up in your writing this year: oh much i'm sure, i put myself into everything i write intentionally or not just because its such a personal thing for me but um in persistence of memory all the timeloop media references and agents of shield as i have always been reference specifically

16. Any new wisdom you can share with other writers: read and write! nothing is ever going to help you as much as that. read fics yes, but read books and poetry anthologies and non-fiction! and write! write fic, write shitty poetry in your notes app, write short fiction, start a book. in the wise words of shia la boeuf JUST DO IT

17. Any projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year: ohhh okay so i have plans for two very big buddie aus an agents of shield au where fitzsimmons are technically henchim but buddie gets their romantic scenes, and then a national treasure au because i am a SUCKER for those films and chimney as riley is something that can be soooo personal

18. Tag some writers whose answers you’d like to read: ummm just anyone who wants to do this?? feel free to say i tagged you because my brain isn't working!!

#sami rambles #this is long sorry #but it was really fun #and definitely not a way for me to ignore all that aforementioned uni work #tag game #long post

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pankomako · 1 year

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there's probably like a million others out there already, but since im seeing a lot of my friends hop on tumblr due to the twitter situation i figured i'd give this a go. so, welcome to

panko's guide to tumblr!

i've been using this site for almost a year now, so i suppose i'm at least somewhat qualified to do this. i mainly just want to do this for fun honestly. i think lots of people have covered more of the setup and what to expect from tumblr as a whole so i think i'll focus on more of the usage of this site, because it's definitely much different from twitter, and, in my opinion, FAR better, plus that's the thing people seem to be the most confused about. so, here we go!

Post Features

the first thing you may notice is that tumblr has no character limit on posts! if you want to post a 10,000 word essay on the motives of your favorite character from the video game or tv show you're super into right now, nobody's stopping you. already so much more convenient than making threads on twitter.

there's a variety of options you can use to make your text more visually interesting, add emphasis, and/or organize your post! when you highlight text (at least on browser, i dont use the app), these options will appear above what you highlighted. you can make your text bold, italicized, bigger (on a new line), smaller, crossed out, or even colored! under the drop-down list there are other options too such as cursive text and lists. you can also add hyperlinks to text if you want. (this is all in the rich text editor, you can also switch to HTML or Markdown by going to your post settings.)

you can also add plenty of other media to posts! you can add up to 30 images which you can arrange however you please, although from my experience arranging images is kinda clunky, but still way better than twitter lol. you can also add gifs, videos (one per post), audio files (10 per post), and embed links. you can also add a cutoff line where everything under that line is hidden under a "read more" button, which is very useful for longer posts.

when you make a post, there is a space to add a title, but it's not required. most people don't add titles unless it helps with formatting.

you can also schedule a post to be posted at a certain time, queue posts to be posted on a consistent schedule, change who can reblog a post, and even save posts as drafts if you want/need to come back to them later.

Tags

Under every post you make/reblog, there is an option to add tags. these are in their own section under the post itself. you can add as many as you want afaik, but they can only be so many characters long. on tumblr, tags have multiple uses.

you can add tags that correspond to your post such as the topic or fandom (and characters/people involved), or whether it's art or photography, for example, to try to help get your post out there. it's preferred and just better in general to only add tags that are relevant to your post. don't tag character fanart as sports or food or pop music, but ESPECIALLY not an unrelated fandom.

you can also use tags to organize your blog and make it easier to find specific posts. you can tag your own art as "my art" and art you reblog from friends as "friends' art", and even create your own tags for specific topics you frequently post about, such as your oc world or a fandom fic or au you have. i personally don't use tags for organization much, but i do have my own tags for the two oc worlds i have. (you can do this even if you're not a fandom-goer or artist, these just serve as an example bc im both lol)

you can even use tags to add extra comments to a post. lord knows i do this a lot myself. lots of people will use tags to sort of ramble off-handedly under a post when it's not the main content of said post. this is especially common under reblogs - more on that later. since you can add spaces within tags, writing full sentences in the tags is easy and a very common practice. just be careful when using commas; adding a comma starts a new tag.

Notes

similarly to how twitter has likes, retweets and comments, tumblr has likes, reblogs and replies. however, these are all combined into one sum of notes. all notes on a post are compiled under the source post. by clicking on the number of notes under a post, you can see a list of all replies, likes and reblogs on a post, if you're curious like me.

on tumblr, likes act as more of a bookmarking tool. you can look at a list of all the posts you liked, and you can have this list displayed on your blog if you want, but likes do NOT increase the visibility of a post. if you want to help a post gain traction, you need to reblog it. if you don't want that post on your blog, but you want to let the person know that you've seen and enjoyed their post, you can leave a like as a small but kind gesture if you want. if you were playing minecraft, liking a post would be akin to punching a mob, but reblogging would be like using a sword. it may not necessarily be a powerful diamond sword, but it does more than a one-damage punch. i should also mention - you can only like a post once; if you like a reblog of a post, you like the source post and can't like separate reblogs of the post.

reblogs are the core of tumblr's functionality. this site does not have an algorithm, so reblogs are the only way for posts to circulate. it's probably pretty easy to figure out, but reblogs put another person's post on your own blog and on your followers' feeds. this is likely the biggest difference between tumblr and twitter: you can reblog a post as many times as you want, and you can add on to a post directly by reblogging, which is much different from a quote-tweet on twitter. also different from quote-tweets, all notes on reblogs are notes contributed to the source post. in a reblog, you can add a comment either in normal text or in the tags, and you can add images and gifs as well. it's common courtesy to put comments that don't contribute to the post in the tags, such as saying you think a post is funny. lots of famous tumblr posts are chains of reblogs - unlike on twitter where you can only retweet one tweet/reply at a time, you can reblog these reblog chains. you can also add the tags of the person you reblogged from to your own reblog if you want, though usually people just say "prev" if they liked the previous reblogger's tags.

replies are a convenient way to have a conversation under a post without repeatedly reblogging. although convenient, replies are limited in what you can do with them. they're text-only and have a character cap. but they're still a good way to add a quick comment to a post if you don't want it on your blog. you can also reply directly to a person in the notes of a post by mentioning them in your reply. replies can be deleted from a post or be turned off for a post entirely by the original poster.

I think that's about all you need to know to get started posting and reblogging, but please feel free to add on if i did happen to forget anything. thanks for reading and happy tumbling! :D

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kindersturm · 1 month

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A STUDY OF ... the taste of blood, the passing of habits, abuse's influence on a child, forced murder turned willing, unending anger, unknowing parental figures, starving in the sun, and hibernating to stone.

the pillar man JULYA KYBURZ from JOJO'S BIZARRE ADVENTURE.

snowed in by nami

Don't be a dick. This is probably my number one thing, this is for tumblr, it's writing, it's for fun. So lets have fun.

Selective. Mutuals Only. For the sake of my comfort, this blog is selective and mutuals only, meaning if I don't follow you, please don't try to thread with me or reblog my posts. I'm okay with sending questions or anons, but actual threads is a nono.

Mun =/= Muse. I AM NOT JULYA. Big important. Please don't equate her morals and actions to my own.

I will not hold back my muse. I don't like to restrict or hold back my muse. I let the muse go in the directions the muse wants. The second I feel forced or the muse feels forced to do something that's out of character or unrealistic for the character, it causes inspiration to dwindle. That being said, I will ALWAYS ask before I do anything drastic. Communication is key! If there is ever an issue with anything, just let me know and we can discuss!!

Triggers. This blog is going to have a lot of triggering content. For that reason this blog is 18+ only. To list the main triggers: child abuse, starvation, torture, murder, manipulation, suicidal history, ptsd episodes, and intense anger issues. as for my own triggers, I don't have any. You don't need anything specifically to tag for me.

Discord/IMs. Discord is open for mutuals!! I am practically always on discord, I do the occasional discord drop, but all you have to do is ask and I'll give it to you.

Other Blogs. I HAVE MANY OTHER BLOGS...If I am not here I'm probably on vitrumbra or picavecalyx!

Activity. Holy heck is my activity going to fluctuate. I have am a full time college student going into animation, and I also have a bunch of other blogs...and general needs for my own mental health. This blog is likely going to be LOW ACTIVITY for that reason. If you want to see me somewhere I'm more active, go to picavecalyx, I'm pretty much always writing on there. I also do discord, which I'm likely to respond usually immediately.

Length. I have a habit of writing a lot. Like a lot-- You don't need to match my length, I just ask you give me enough to work with...that being said if you reply to like 5 paragraphs with a single sentence, I probably won't continue the thread lol.

I think that's it? I'll add more if necessary :)

#nami. 21. it/its #pinned post #jjba rp

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amtrak12 · 4 months

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AO3 Wrapped for 2023!

I got tagged by @purlturtle for this, so thank you! :D Let's see how I did on fics in 2023.

Overall Stats:

Works Published: 2 - because a Pushing Daisies snippet snuck in there lol

Word Count: 92,498

Kudos: 475

Bookmarks: 161 (99 public and it's killing me ahaha I just want a nice round number again D:)

Subscriptions: 285

(All of those stats are heavily, heavily skewed towards one fic over the other as you'll see below :P)

Individual Stats:

Most Popular by Kudos: Can We Keep Her, my Lucifer S3 time travelling toddler rewrite at 471 kudos. (Out of my 475 total for the year LMAO. I told you the stats are skewed!)

Most hits: Can We Keep Her (Lucifer) again with 14,688 hits. Listen I really only wrote one fic this year. The Pushing Daisies one barely counts.

Longest: Can We Keep Her (Lucifer) at 92,307 words published as of today and still growing. Fun fact: This is also my longest fic ever published! So it would've won this category in any year.

Shortest: Three Lifetimes (Pushing Daisies) at 191 words. I did have other one shot ideas after my rewatch but I had to save my energy for the Lucifer WIP.

Most Comments: SHOCKINGLY (not), it's Can We Keep Her (Lucifer) with 186 comment threads/415 total comments. My greatest wish when this fic is all said and done is to hit 1000 total comments because I'll never be able to hit that in any other fandom I could ever be in for the rest of my life. And if it does turn out to be 30 chapters long (or more!), then I'm actually on pace to achieve it :')

(And this is where I go more into fic recs than talking about my own fics, because I did not write (or read tbh) enough to have proper answers for this section.)

Fics that made me cry:

Writing: The [redacted] scene for Can We Keep Her that I've played a million times in my head but haven't actually written yet cause I'm only halfway through the story. Maybe also the time travel reveal scene which gets posted in January, but that's lived in my head for so long, I can no longer tell what feelings it evokes.

Reading: never have I ever by jrrmint (Lucifer). S4 Chloe/Lucifer smut. It doesn't make me cry, but it does make me ache because it's Season 4, aka the angstiest season, and this fic makes it even messier than canon was which is just beautiful in the 'I have a history of loving soap operas' way. :D :D It also taught me cheating is a trope I will eat up with a goddamn spoon for this ship. Like HOLY SHIT! Eve, I love you, babe, but I need more Chloe/Lucifer S4 cheating fic pronto! O_O

(NOT S3 cheating fic. It does not work as well, because the Chloe/Pierce relationship was already a stupid decision -- by both the writers and the character -- so let's not add even more stupid decisions on top of it. However, everybody's already hitting rock bottom in S4 (and at different times too!) so that's why the cheating trope works so deliciously there.)

Fics that made me smile:

Writing: The opening scene to chapter 7 in Can We Keep Her still makes me laugh so much. Rory's manipulative little "My heart hurts :(" ploy absolutely kills me, plus all the other 'Day 2 of a baby angel' chaos that's happening. Also all of chapter 9 with the Deckerstar family domestics of putting Trixie and Rory to bed. A++ me. Makes me grin everytime.

Reading: If He's a Tramp (He's a Good One) by maybemalapert (laconicsims) -- Lucifer joins Chloe and Trixie on a trip to Disneyland, set (and written) in early S2. I'm absolutely loving reading the Lucifer fics in chronological order/reverse page order on AO3 since I came to the show after the entire thing aired. And this little one shot was wonderful <3

Group Activities:

Gifts: No gifts given or received this year.

Collaborations: I did do something here, though! I was a beta reader in the Bering and Wells Big Bang event. :) I helped with Dawn of the Dragonborn: Heart of a Hero, Heart of a Predator, Heart of Dovahkiin which was written by Rinari7. Not finished yet, but hopefully someday! Because the outline was really detailed and incredible. So, so, so fun AU even if you know very little about Skyrim (like me)!

Events: Also the Bering and Wells Big Bang. I still absolutely could never be a writer for such an event because I get too stressed and freeze whenever I try. But I really enjoyed being a beta reader! Less pressure lol

#about me #AO3 Wrapped 2023 #I added the subheaders to help split the text up better cause I got rambly :S lol #if you see this on your dash and want to do it pretend I tagged you #(and feel free to tag me in that claim when you make your post so I can read your own AO3 stats! I'd love to see them!)

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thegirl-kjrp · 1 year

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Name: N/A

Alias: The Girl

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Age: Appears to be approximately 8 years old

Birthday: unknown

Gender: Female

Ethnicity: unknown, although she appears to be of mixed race and/or afro-latino.

Appearance: Short stature with sholder length light brown curly hair, blue eyes, and tanned skin.

Status: Alive

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Immediate family: Mother, (deceased) [REDACTED]. Father, unknown.

Note: Fabulous Four is considered adoptive family

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Red text is Party

Green text is Ghoul

Blue text is Jet

About the writers:

Hi! You can call me Ash, I write for The Girl and others (as seen by my multiple side blogs...it's like the characters have minds of their own lol). I'm always down to write be it a thread or anything, even with new people, and feel free to shoot me an ask or a dm at any time! I swear I'm not as mean as my characters can be lol.

A couple things to note, I'm a junior in high school with a lot on my plate. Between honors courses, band, theatre, clubs, hobbies, and general life stressors, I just can't be as active as I would like to be. In addition, I'm physically and mentally disabled as well as immunocompromised. There are times where I'll get sick and be significantly more/less active.

Also, my memory is absolute dogshit. If I forget to reply or something, just let me know. There's a 50/50 chance that I ran out of spoons or just straight up forgot.

So, yep, I think that's enough about me. Rules are down below, as well as Mary's intro post, and I look forward to writing with you all!

P.S. pls use they/them pronouns when referring to me thank you very much

[Insert Mary's lil paragraph about herself here when she gets the time to write it]

Rules:

-Please do not ask to roleplay smut, we're both minors (16 and 17) and therefore uncomfortable with that.

-no playing god

-please discuss before injury is inflicted

-please be kind and keep in mind that we're both very inexperienced rpers, so we may make mistakes or typos at times

-please let us know if we need to tag or add trigger warnings to anything.

-don't be an ass. Please. If your character is thats cool, but if you are, we will block you. Goodbye.

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weponized · 1 year

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@itsautismmydearwatson thanks for the tag 💕 :) !! I'm c&ping this thing because it was way to long of a thread lol.

ThreeShips - Shipping is something I do but at the same time I don't so,,, McHanna, Johnlock and ... Mina and Johnathan, the first heterosexual couple.

FirstShip - To the surprise of no one, ever, it was Holmes and Watson. The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes is probably the pice of literature that has lead more children into queerness and fandom culture since it's inception.

Favorite Color- Cobalt blue.

LastSong- Milonga Triste, in the Roberto Goyeneche version. Something something I'm an old man, something something the all consuming greif of losing a lover and the existencial horror produced by guilt when you think it was your fault.

Last Movie In Theatres - I went to see 1985 with my family. I'll take this opportunity to add a remainder: Videla died shitting himself in a common prision and we should feel a tiny bit victorious about it at least once a day.

Last Show- Cunk on Earth, if it is about the last one I finished.

Currently Watching- I'm making my way trough Akira Kurosawa's entire philmography this month. I think that counts.

Currently Reading- The Wretched of the Earth by Frantz Fannon.

Currently Working On- About five wips simultaneously, because I'm dumb. And a new barn for my cows that's better insulated and has a better water system, because I love to spoil my girlies. (Just to be clear: their current one is fine I just like building stuff.)

Current Obsession: Piano playing, ethimology and just on a bad film phase in general.

Tagging anyone who wants to do this because I literally know no people here.

#Captain's log: supplemental.#tag games

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izzy-b-hands · 4 years

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Every Road Leads to an End, Pt. 1

Y’all had to know this was coming at some point lol. My first Kingsman fic, this one in particular set Post-Golden Circle. I’ve got a lot more planned, for this time period plus during each movie and in between, but for now, I think this is a good start.

A forewarning that I’m taking canon and making it what I want, because while I love the movies dearly, there’s also a good number of things I’d have maybe done differently, or at least messed about with and considered changing. For one, the little pup Eggsy gets Harry in Golden Circle? He’s around again, because I wanted to know what happened to the puppy. I named him PJ, for Pickle, JR (after dear Mr. Pickle.)

So, here that is!

My love to all who read/like/reblog!

“You texted me, and I quote, ‘Major emergency, come quickly.’ This-”

“Is an emergency,” Harry finished.

Eggsy stared down at PJ, who was wagging his tiny tail happily. “This is dog-sitting. I thought there was a mission, and I’m only supposed to be called back in the event of that or-.”

“There is, this!”

“Okay, and where are you off to then? If there isn’t a mission, aside from watching your dog,” Eggsy asked as he picked up PJ.

“I...have a date.”

“You have...where did you meet...I have so many questions,” Eggsy said.

“And they will have to wait; I am already late. Thank you for arriving so promptly, instructions are on the fridge regarding PJ’s dinner and bedtime, and I’ve left you money for your dinner,” Harry was like a bullet on track to its target, walking fast enough Eggsy could hardly keep up as he followed him to his bedroom.

“Oi! Now I get to ask at least one question before you go.”

“Fine, one. Then I need to finish dressing; I cannot find the right color pocket square I need-”

“I’ll help you find it if you answer,” Eggsy interrupted. “Where’d you meet her?”

“Him.”

“Okay, him. Where was it? I mean, you’re something of a homebody, when you aren’t working-”

“I am not,” Harry scoffed, and turned to rifle through the pile of folded pocket squares tossed on his bed. “I do things.”

“You texted me a week ago, and I quote-”

“That is quite enough of my quotes, I think.”

“You keep interrupting like that; I’ll just find more of them. Anyway, as I was saying, you said ‘lots of excitement tonight, saw a fox in the garden.’ I mean...Harry.”

“Are you going to help me find it, or not? I need the same shade of salmon as my tie, and I’ve found every other shade under the bloody sun, and I even sort these by shade, I’ll have you know, and,” Harry sighed and tossed a handful of squares back onto the bed.

“You’re nervous!”

“I have been in situations far worse than a first date; I am not made nervous by this,” Harry shook his head, and shuffled through another bunch of squares.

“You are absolutely a nervous wreck, oh my God. This is adorable! Look at your dad, PJ. I have never seen you like this.”

Harry sighed again, clearly exasperated, and turned to Eggsy.

“Put the face away, I’ll help. Now, don’t get mad, but could you just wear a different color tie, that matches one of the squares we know are here and ready to be worn?”

The kiss on the cheek wasn’t expected, but it was sweet. “Eggsy! Genius! I’ll change it straightaway, then-ooh, I’m going to be even later! I don’t have an excuse for that, we had a reservation and everything...”

“Tell him I was late showing up. I don’t mind taking the blame,” Eggsy bit back a giggle as Harry whirled past him to another drawer. “Would I know him, if I saw him?”

Harry stopped dead.

“Harry?”

He turned again, a new silk light green tie in his hand. “I can’t...I will tell you. All of it, later. I promise you that. This is also, technically, a mission. That turned into more, and if anyone else with Kingsman or Statesman found out it had, the trouble we would be in.”

“So he works for Statesman?”

“No.”

“He works for us?”

“Eggsy, please,” Harry sighed desperately as he switched ties. “Like I said, I will tell you everything, later. Once things are more...solid.”

“As in your relationship with him, or the mission?” Eggsy asked as he set down PJ, and swatted Harry’s hand away from the tie. “You’ve got it all crooked, hang on. And is the mission to...you know?”

“Eggsy!”

“Just checking! Even if it isn’t, I mean, I can spend the night here with PJ. I’m already the ‘Prince That’s Never Seen’ to the Swedish media. Won’t be any issue if I’m not home for a day or two, and I let Tilde know it might be a few days, depending on what was going on. So, you know. If things happen...let them happen. Have some fun. Safe fun, I mean, actually, do you have-”

Harry was bright red as he snatched up the matching pocket square and his coat from his bed, and strode out of the bedroom with Eggsy and PJ on his heels.

“Oh, look at him blush! PJ, your dad is gonna have a wonderful night, isn’t he?”

PJ barked in response, wiggling as Eggsy picked him up again.

“Yes, he is, and then he’s going to tell us all about it when he gets back,” Eggsy continued, even as Harry spluttered half-protests, sighing and shaking his head as he walked out the front door.

Without any shoes on.

“Give him a minute,” Eggsy told PJ, who stared up curiously at him. “He’ll realize in one, two, three, and-”

“Oh for fuck’s sake,” Harry spat as he stomped back inside, struggling on with his shoes before heading back out, one oxford still untied.

“That’s a lad,” Eggsy smiled. “C’mon PJ. I think you deserve your dinner, and I will order mine, and then I think a movie is in order. We’ll find something with a dog in it, just for you.”

It wasn’t long before they were settled on the couch; PJ fed and a pizza box open on the coffee table, and the closest thing Eggsy could find for ‘something with dogs’ (an episode of Planet Earth) on the TV for PJ.

Then his phone buzzed with a text alert.

Stuck between a rock and a hard place. Advice?

Eggsy frowned at the text from Harry. Text were strictly for non-Kingsman, and non-confidential and/or coded Kingsman business. This, however, wasn’t code for anything that he knew of.

Is one of the things the guy you’re seeing? And if so, what is the other thing?

He could hear Harry’s frustration in the reply.

No! Not exactly. He invited me over, but he knows we’d both be in trouble if anyone knew about this; no one is even supposed to know he’s alive!!

That many exclamation points signaled a show of proper emotion from Harry, whatever this was, it was deeply serious to him. But it was hard to advise when he only had not even a quarter of the story. He sent back his biggest question.

Who?????!!!!!!

For about five minutes, there was nothing, and he almost set his phone back down on the coffee table. Then:

Merlin.

“Fucking hell,” Eggsy murmured. “And how in the hell? There’s no way...somebody has to be fucking with him, which means who knows what he’s gotten himself into now.”

He sighed, and bemoaned that he had left his luggage at his hotel, rather than bringing it with. There wouldn’t be enough time to get it, change into a suit, and try and configure Harry’s location so he could get there.

Unless.

He hadn’t ever actually spent a night in Harry’s guest room, but Harry had always assured him it was supplied for him, should he and Tilde ever need a place to stay. Searching it proved just that: three suits with varying colors of ties and other accouterments for him, and three matching dresses and pants suits for Tilde, plus three tiny matching jackets that would have fit JB.

“PJ, you hold down the fort, yeah? You’re a big boy now, I think I can trust you,” Eggsy said as he finished putting in his cuff links and pulled on his jacket, watching as PJ settled down on the couch with a sigh, his grey wiry fir blending into the dark material. “I’m gonna go make sure your dad makes it home, and when we get back, we’ll have that leftover pizza. I’ll make sure he lets you have a little, promise.”

From there, he was on his own. His watch and glasses let him track Harry somewhat, but wherever he was, he was on the move. With whoever this impostor Merlin was, surely, and that was who he really wanted to track. But even if this Merlin was using any Kingsman or Statesman tech, he wasn’t registering on any of Eggsy’s gear.

He got as close as an Italian restaurant, dropped off by a non-Kingsman cab, if only so as not to arouse Harry or the faux-Merlin’s suspicions if they were near enough to see it. There, outside of it, the dot representing Harry had stopped. Or so it seemed to have, finally, though at no point had the dot gone into the restaurant, leaving him wondering where on earth the actual dinner had been, and why on earth Harry was stumbling around in the dark with the faux-Merlin.

There were a few dark alleyways just near the restaurant. A small chance to be sure, too easy if anything. But as he wandered down the first, the blip of Harry’s dot on the map superimposed over his glasses got louder and louder and-

“Jesus,” Eggsy ducked behind a bin, then peeked back out over it.

Up against a nearby wall in the alley were Harry, and what for all the world looked like Merlin, kissing hard and utterly unaware of anything else going on around them, apparently, since he hadn’t exactly been quiet as he’d ducked away.

“If I’m wrong,” Eggsy whispered to himself, then shook his head. Even if this was somehow real, Merlin had somehow survived the land mine and was safe and back, it was better to check, to interrupt and know for sure.

“Let him go,” he stood and pulled his pistol, pointing it at the possibly faux Merlin.

“I think he’d rather I didn’t,” and god it sounded like Merlin. “Harry, did you not tell him?”

“I was going to, later,” Harry hissed, and whipped around. “Put that down! What on earth are you doing?”

“Not many men could survive a land mine. Fewer still could survive it, and be repaired well enough to go into hiding afterwards. So if you really are Merlin, and if you are...know that I am sorry for all this, but I’ve got to have answers. As of right now, I have no proof you aren’t some...double, hell bent on doing God knows what with Harry-”

“Hell bent on doing something with him, that’s for sure,” Merlin murmured and giggled, pressing a kiss to Harry’s cheek. “If you’re still up for it, after we explain things and send Eggsy on home.”

Harry sighed and pushed himself away from Merlin. “Look. I-I should have just told you everything straight away. I know you, and you’re a good agent. And a good agent would have done just as you’re doing now. It’s just...I mean, this was a date!”

“Still is,” Merlin called from the wall. “This isn’t quite how I saw it going, no, and I certainly didn’t think Eggsy would be involved, but this doesn’t ruin the night or anything.”

“Oh my God,” Harry muttered, and pushed his glasses up as he rubbed the bridge of his nose.

Eggsy lowered his gun. “Well?”

“Tell you what,” Merlin said, striding forward. “You both come back to mine, for now. We can explain things, then Eggsy, you can go back home feeling that all is well-”

“To Harry’s, actually. I was dog sitting,” Eggsy interrupted before stowing his gun away.

“Right, back to Pickles, JR, then, knowing that all is well and Harry is safe,” Merlin continued. “And Harry, if you’d like, well...”

“I could just about die right now. And I’ve never said that about anything,” Harry sighed.

“Dramatic, outside of work, isn’t he?” Merlin snickered as he led them out of the alley and down the sidewalk. “Part of why I asked him out, you know. Nice to get to see the man under the agent again. Don’t get me wrong, I love the agent, but I liked the man first.”

“Makes sense,” Eggsy replied, giggling as Harry blushed ever more red, trailing just behind them. “So, did you two ever...before this, I mean?”

“That’s a lot of old history to be getting into,” Merlin smiled. “Maybe a bit too much for tonight, but later on, perhaps-”

“Oh my God,” Harry muttered again.

“Think I should take the overuse of that phrase as a good sign for later?” Merlin asked with a positively wicked grin.

“MERLIN!”

Eggsy and Merlin fell against each other in a fit of laughter as Harry sighed deeply yet again.

He calmed once they were in Merlin’s house though, his coat off and tossed onto the couch as if he lived there, and Eggsy half-wondered as they settled onto it.

“So. I’ll make a long story short, so you can get back to PJ, and we can get back to...other things,” Merlin said. “I did survive the mine, but barely. And I very nearly didn’t survive the jungle, because my tracker didn’t click on again to let Ginger Ale know I was still kicking until you all had already left.”

“How the hell did you survive?”

Merlin shrugged. “I shouldn’t have, Eggsy. Chalk that one up to dumb luck, perhaps. That, and Ginger Ale, or should I say now, Agent Whiskey’s fantastic medical research and work with prosthetics.”

Eggsy gestured to Merlin’s legs. “I have to admit, I was curious.”

“Amazingly built prosthetics, all thanks to Agent Whiskey. She assembled a team to get me out, get me to Kentucky, and get me healed and well again. And she would have told you and Harry both right away, but-”

“It wasn’t assured he would survive,” Harry interrupted. “And so I asked them not to say anything to you at that time. I didn’t want you to lose him twice. I figured it, rather selfishly, I admit, that it would be enough for me to lose him twice.”

“But you didn’t,” Merlin said softly, grabbing Harry’s hand. “I’m right here, not going anywhere.”

Harry only nodded, but Eggsy could see his fingers tighten around Merlin’s.

“With you still not knowing I was alive, and my continued survival not assured at that point, I was put into a sort of hiding. Kept in Kentucky, under Statesman medical care and guard. I remain under their guard now, to some degree, and not Kingsman guard because, well-” Merlin shrugged. “Kingsman is still rebuilding. We have Agent Tequila here, and Harry, and yourself as a reserve agent, but that isn’t much. And there’s concern that some of the guards I tried to take out with me are still out there, and might be looking for me.”

“Didn’t they find them all? Or all the pieces of them, I guess,” Eggsy asked.

“Enough...pieces to make up all the bodies except for two. We might have presumed they were just truly blown to smithereens, until certain messages started to arrive at various locations, specifically the rubble of the Kingsman HQ and your old home, Eggsy. Agent Whiskey was the one who suggested surveillance on those locations and a few others after I was recovered from the field, and thank goodness she did. We might never have seen them until it was too late, otherwise.”

“Too late?”

“Attacks,” Harry said. “On Statesman HQ, specifically trying to get to the medical ward. One got damned close too. No identifiable information on them, except that everything done to erase their identity was similar to what Poppy had done to her cronies. Erased fingerprints, filed down teeth, all that. But since we know Poppy is dead, that tells us nothing. And the henchman that we thought died when the land mine went off weren’t identifiable either, not even the pieces of the dead ones. So figuring out who the live ones are, if they are alive, and where they are...”

“Damn near impossible, until another attack, which hasn’t happened because you’ve been kept under guard here. And that’s why no one was supposed to know you’re alive,” Eggsy finished.

“And why this,” Harry sighed, picking up Merlin’s hand and kissing it, “is so very risky. If anything happened as a result of me, I swear-”

“I know, and I’m willing to take the risk,” Merlin interrupted. “Anyone would for someone they love. Eggsy would for Tilde, essentially does being married while being an agent, right Eggsy?”

Eggsy nodded. “Harry. You shouldn’t deny yourself this, happiness, just because of the risk. There’s always going to be something, you know? Life just isn’t that easy, that safe...especially for us. Tilde and I, we know the risk, and we both accept it to be together. If you and Merlin feel the same...why not go for it?”

The look Harry was giving Merlin gave Eggsy his out. “And, that said, I think maybe my portion of the evening is complete, and the portion with you two is uh...yeah. I’m gonna head out, go back and let PJ have the bit of pizza I promised him, and then turn in for the night, and you two aren’t even paying attention to a word I’m saying right now.”

They certainly didn’t seem to be, again concerned only with each other and kissing and the fussing about with Harry’s tie, which was plenty for Eggsy to see.

“I mean good for ‘em, you know?” he told PJ as they snuggled on the couch, his suit hung back up in the guest room of Harry’s house, the pizza warmed up for a late night/early morning snack. “But...bit like watching your parents snog, you know? Like, they’re adults, consenting and all that and isn’t like that...urge disappears as you age, I just. It was time for me to not see anymore. You get it, right, PJ?”

PJ whimpered, and snuggled in closer. He was laid out on Eggsy’s chest, and very nearly had his cold nose poking Eggsy’s chin as he moved closer and closer.

“Aw. You just miss your dad, don’t you? Well, never fear, he’ll be home in the morning. Er, later morning, considering the time. Dads have to have their fun too, and in the meantime you’ve got me!”

Eggsy flicked off the TV and closed his eyes, listening to PJ’s soft breathing as he finally fell asleep.

And then his watch buzzed on his wrist.

He carefully moved his arm, to not disturb PJ, and looked at the alert.

ALL KINGSMAN AND STATESMAN AGENTS, REPORT TO NEAREST HQ LOCATION IMMEDIATELY. AGENT COMPROMISATION HAS OCCURRED.

#text post #LeeH writes #kingsman fic #harry hart x merlin #not sure what else to tag rn #so lemme know if y'all want others added!#I'll figure out the tagging as I write the next part of this and the other fics I have in mind lol #eggsy is here too of course #like there's gonna be multiple plot threads of Harry and Merlin and stuff with Eggsy going on plus major Spy Problems #so I'll add tags in as we add in more threads lol

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itsjustliah · 7 years

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I wanna know more about your love for ffxiv turning into hate

oh boy, here’s an exhaustive list!!!most of the following reasons are either personal game preferences (I don’t like grinding or wasting my time waiting around), my mental health (”people will make fun of me for being too edgy”, “they’re ghosting me after 2 weeks of pokes because they hate me”) or due to shitty experiences I’ve had, so don’t take my opinion of the game too personally.

I’m done with:- the endless tomestone grind through the same two dungeons every 3 months and 100 shitty dungeons with low level newbies- running the same endgame raid over and over to try and get my one drop for the week- raiding, which has been shitty since Heavensward and if I’m not in a static/running super hard for Tuesdays™ I can get fucked on a clear for anything- sitting and waiting for rpers to respond for 20 minutes while my computer can’t run any other game at the same time, and I tend to respond quickly (within 3 minutes)- going to RP events and being forced to do nothing but constantly read through the long-ass scroll just to see if the two people I’m talking to replied, then miss when they replied anyway- the amount of times I’ve struck up a convo/rp with a new partner and it’s turned out to be a horrible, stressful experience- the amount of drama I’ve had to deal with due to shitty people and being unable to call them out on it or warn people about them because “don’t start drama” - the “always walking on eggshells” part of the RP community- not caring about XIV has led to me not caring about XIV lore anymore and due to a horrendously negative experience with lore lawyers my first time RPing, I’m too anxious to try doing my own plot/lore-driven story for fear I’ll be ridiculed like a bunch of my lore lawyers friends now ridicule some people in the community- none of the friends I started playing XIV with play anymore and a lot of my RP friends have moved into other cliques and don’t talk to me anymore (which happens, not like I’ve been playing this game at all for 6+ months)- I have way more fun playing other games where I don’t have to sit around waiting all the time (for replies, for queues, for people to be on to RP with)- the combination of distaste for xiv and my current heavy workload leading me to never be on or available when people in my FC are roleplaying (making me feel more awkward trying to jump in four weeks later, knowing that I can’t be a real part of the story since I likely won’t be able to participate for another month)

those and I’ve found other ways to spend my time that are much more fun-efficient and less anxiety-causing. hell, even when I get toxic-ass players in overwatch, I don’t have to see them around tumblr or in game all the time, I only gotta deal with them for 20 minutes tops. plus with how busy I am with work and shit lately, I’d rather spend my time actually playing games versus running the same content over and over or slogging through RP events.

plus it’s loads better for my mental health that I’m not constantly feeling stressed/guilty about not rping / annoyed/pissed off about drama in the community. honestly, it’s a huge load off my shoulders. I have low tolerance for bullshit and just can’t be bothered with it anymore. there are way better ways for me to spend my time in a healthier manner.

honestly I probably would have quit the game back in 3.0 had I not started RPing lmao

#shitposting #ffxiv #it is really really hard to care about a story set in a game you don't give a shit about anymore #i mean at least stormblood's story was better #but the love was gone months before stormblood #also here's some bonus salt content for you!#defining shitty people who turned me off of the community #lol I should drive up and come fuck you upon a guy finding out I lived in a neighboring state #I know we haven't spoken in six months but here's a random paragraph about how edgy my character is now #I just started a relationship with your character but I have a crush on a girl I just met in an LS so I have to call it off #I'm going to pretend to be your friend but file false complaints with your FC when you start RPing too much with my friends #and everyone will take my side later because my art is cute #I'll listen to your FC complaints but then never do anything about them especially the person who's been abusive to you #who I'm going to make an officer now because they're my good friend and I'm sure they were just in a bad mood... again #Let me start a bunch of threads with you and drop them and ignore every one of your pokes over months at a time because fuck you that's why #I'm going to pretend to be your good friend but talk shit about you and your friends behind your back #then start a new account and try to get you to RP with me but add you on the same dicord account so you find out it's me anyway #the last one was more confusing than upsetting in the end #how can one woman have so many bad rp experiences?#find out in the tags!#and of course even posting this gave me anxiety #because god forbid someone from my fc sees and thinks i'm talking about them #this isn't about any of you lovely people my goodness #there wasn't anything you could've done

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