can't stop thinking about the way all of loki's brushes with death came from a choice. first the attempted suicide. then the attempted self-sacrifice. and finally a successful self-sacrifice, in which he not only threw himself in death's way but threw himself into the hands of his torturer, a being he had been hiding from for years.
people make jokes about loki always pretending to die but the truth is he is always trying to. he is convinced that his death will be a solution to other people's (mostly thor's) problems.
he is constantly choosing to die. his first instinct in any crisis situation is to solve it at the cost of his life. he doesn't seem to have any self worth or a sense that maybe it's better for him to live, and it's fucking tragic.
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Currently sick to my stomach thinking about how Percy was talking to Luke about why he didn’t choose him because he was worried if it came between him and Annabeth he’d betray him for Annabeth and he betrayed them both.
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There's an old song about an undying love between the sun and the moon. It ends with the world burning during an eclipse.
Here is the art cover for the zine "The Eclipse" I made with @d-cybele about Echo, my tiefling knight of the dark moons, and Galahad his bff/ennemy/lover (it's complicated).
Galahad belongs to @d-cybele
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shout out to the asexuals who aren’t aromantic, but don’t desire a romantic relationship!
shout out to the aromantics who aren’t asexual, but don’t desire a sexual relationship!
shout out to the aspecs who feel like they have to ‘make up’ for their lack of attraction!
you don’t have to give anyone shit. keep being cool like that! i’m cheering you on!
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ARE WE AFFIRMING YOUR GENDER?! IS THAT WHAT WE’RE DOING?!
Sci, first of all, I’m so sorry your dad said that listing your pronouns is embarrassing. It’s 2024. What’s embarrassing is being a parent who cares more about what other people think of them than what their child thinks of them. People don’t have to understand you, they don’t even have to agree with you, but if someone says they love you, the least they can do is make the attempt to show you they respect your identity as an individual person. I know this is particularly difficult for parents sometimes but it’s not impossible. I sincerely hope that someday your dad realizes how spectacular you are and how lucky he is to have the opportunity of knowing and loving someone as truly kind, funny, and generous as you are.
Second of all, LET’S GIVE ANOTHER SHOUT OUT TO THOSE PRONOUNS. Oooo I like the way you wear he/him. It’s loud, it’s rebellious, it’s confident, it’s authentic! It’s everything those angry white boys with podcasts WISH they were! You are entering your “boys will be boys” era and it’s covered in bright colors, zany patterns, sequins, and ATTITUDE.
I am so fucking proud of you for taking this big scary step into being your true self and laying it bare before the world. Just last night I was thinking about how one of the reasons I was so miserable in my 20s was because when I was around 21/22 I went back into the closet to make myself “more palatable” for the people around me. Less confusing for them. Less work for them. And I’ll never actually know what experiences I lost when I lost myself. I’ll never know what I could have done, the opportunities and stories and memories I missed out on because I was only living as half a person. I’m back on track now though, and the good news for you is: now that you’ve taken this step you never have to ask that question again.
I’ve gotta say, Sci, announcing your true pronouns is definitely one of the sexiest things you could ever do. And Wade agrees. <3
hooougghh bless you @nobutforrealthough - you're so cool and sexy and ough...
i feel so very exhausted in the head lately about identity things. i think a lot of people thought i was some kind of gender icon when really i'm just piecing things together as best as i can. i feel a little exhausted that people thought so much of me and i'm not delivering on it. (but i've felt that way all the time, all my life, from pretty much everybody.)
i guess it's difficult to do all this alone, without anyone in your corner. i think writing wade and peter, they sort of felt like friends to help me through it, because i don't really have anyone else out there to help me through and speak to me on my level. so – i kind of had to invent voices to give me courage. and it helps. but i worry that it's a little sad, too. sorry. i'm feeling very frank and bare this morning.
it's a lonely old world when you still haven't figured out where you fit in it. and maybe you're not meant to fit. but you kind of do need to fit, for your sanity. for your survival. so you contort and compromise and squeeze yourself into weird shapes and bug your head. and it's all so, so exhausting for me. and i think my body's finally telling me it's time to retire. my body is so, so tired...
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