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icallhimjoey · 1 month

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Reinvent Love

♥ ♥ Joseph Quinn x Fem!Reader

Summary: You and Joe are treading new waters. You’re no longer flatmates, but still close. More than friends, but nothing defined. Nothing labeled. Determined to not lose what you have, though. But, can you?

CW / disclaimer: rpf, fem!reader, language, adult themes, jealousy, accusations, soft fluff, season 3 of my flatmate!joe

Author’s note: the first cracks; they're here - and, again, you don’t need to have read define close or explain us, but it’ll obviously give you backstory, which might help!

Wordcount: 3.6K

part one - part two - part three - part four - part five

It was silly. Joe was being silly.

He knew it, and felt so stupid for it. Like, in hindsight, the worrying felt so dumb. The constant milling shit over didn’t change anything, there was no real point to it. Although, maybe you being on his mind in this... new manner was what summoned you last night.

You just showed up, talking about a crazy day, no sad pouts, no needy touches. Just jittery movements and a lot to tell him.

Joe kind of sat back on his sofa, spread out and leaning into his left elbow and watched you pace around his lounge. Something about something a colleague had said that then turned out to be lies and you found out something by overhearing a phone call you weren’t meant to overhear – Joe was barely following along. Didn’t really try his best to, if he was honest.

He was moreso paying attention to what you were actually doing – were you even aware that you had started grabbing random things he had left lying around on his coffee table, on the kitchen island, on the counters, and one by one, put everything away where it was meant to go?

Joe pursed a smile as he realised you knew exactly where everything went. Why did that make his chest ache in the best of ways?

This new casual form of intimacy seemed so small, but Joe felt how it smothered that little grain of doubt that resided in his chest. That little grain that had convinced him that you were probably going to fall into a new routine with your new flatmate after he moved in and, then you would probably grow close to him and Joe knew how you... no.

No.

He couldn’t think that.

It wasn’t fair on you. He caught himself trying to finish the thought a lot, but he knew it wasn’t fair. Wasn’t true. He didn’t even fully believe it. It was this thing. Still, he also couldn’t help how it simultaneously made him grow a little more possessive and made him want to prepare for the worst.

But, she was here, he had to remind himself.

She’s here.

And she was wandering around his space, letting her train of thought flow freely from her brain into his living room and he used to witness this all the time when you lived together still. Joe realised he’d actually missed it a lot, and wasn’t that the whole point? That he got to miss you now?

God, Joe missed you a lot and you were right there and he could just burst at the seams at how fucking lucky he felt.

He was a just normal guy in a normal flat with a normal relationship– well, normalish relationship, anyway. Not that you had talked about anything yet. Of course you hadn’t. But it was pretty fucking obvious what this was. So he had started shrugging whenever someone would ask if you were actually together, which felt a lot better than the forever, “No, we’re flatmates, what are you talking about?” he used to throw at people, practically gaslighting them out of whatever they thought they’d witnessed between him and the girl that he used to live with.

It was working. The plan he had made, this vague idea of normalcy; it was working out the way he had wanted it to.

And yea, sure, you were getting a new flatmate and Joe had a difficult time not feeling some type of way about that, but, he had made the decision to move out and, look at you now.

“Do you think I can get a raise out of this? Or at least get a weird bonus, mid-term?”

Joe had a hard time not laughing at your question as he saw you had already mentally moved onto something else. You were stood in the middle of the room, both hands on your hips, eyes scanning the room. Everything tidy and organised.

“Joe, when did you last clean?”

Joe followed your gaze up into one of the corners of the ceiling.

“I cleaned today.” Joe said, knowing you’d likely not take it as an honest answer. You had lived together, remember? No fucking way was Joe ever going to feel the urge to maybe sometimes swipe a feather duster across the upper corners of his living room.

You shuddered at the thought of what resided behind his curtains there.

You sighed and tutted and turned back to Joe’s kitchen like you were going to start cleaning his fucking ceilings at half past ten at night.

“Hey, no. No, no. Stop. Will you come sit down a second? My god.” Joe huffed, feigning annoyance. When you turned on your heel and giggled as you scurried over, Joe let a laugh escape his throat just before you let yourself fall into the cushions next to him.

He hooked an arm around your neck to pull you in so he could press his nose into your cheek a second. You gladly let him, and when he held you close like that for longer than you initially thought he would, you suddenly realised you’d just been talking about yourself for twenty minutes straight.

Just barged in with unimportant thoughts on your mind that you just verbally vomited right into Joe’s space. You knew it was mostly nervous energy that was only there because your new flatmate picked up his keys earlier, which now meant there was every opportunity for someone to just... walk into your flat at any given time. That had unexpectedly brought on way more anxiety than you previously thought it would do.

Hence why you decided to just... escape it, and went over to Joe’s to spend the night there.

Joe was pressing his nose into your cheek and held you in place for a bit before he moved his head down, hiding into your neck a second.

“You okay?” you asked softly, head tilting down a bit.

“Mm, yea, fine.” Joe inhaled deeply, before pressing a few small kisses to the crook there and moving back to look at you the in eye. He unhooked his elbow from around your neck and placed two cupped hands on either side of your face, swiping bits of hair back in the process.

Joe was leant all the way back into the sofa, head squished in between two of the back cushions and you took a moment to look at each other. Joe studied your face and rubbed his thumbs across the apples of your cheeks until you grew shy.

“You look tired,” you softly said before Joe sat up a little and leant closer. It had you close your eyes just before scrunching up your nose as he kissed the very tip of it.

“I am tired.” He mused, copying your nose scrunch when you blinked your eyes open again, and Joe looked so soft. Sort of pleased with life, happy to be where he was and like he’d just had a really good productive day. He blinked slowly, eyes only half open, and looked sleepy enough to slip right into dreams the second his head would hit his pillow.

You loved him like this. His hands on you, all soft touches. Comfy and cosy and calm. Just you and him. No one else. No threat of someone randomly walking in.

This was perfect.

“Mmm, me too.” You smiled and let Joe grab one of your elbows to pull an arm across his stomach as he sat back again.

“I’m not surprised. You’ve just done a 5K as you tidied this room, I think.”

You huffed a laugh as you sank into Joe’s side, and then you sat like that in silence for a moment. No TV on. No phones in sight for some easy distraction. Just you and Joe and the view of his living room.

“Are you okay?” Joe suddenly asked, emphasis on the you, and you tried hiding the small, hitched intake of breath by quickly nodding and casually going, “Yea. Fine.”

You could feel how Joe tucked in his chin to look at you.

He waited. Wasn’t going to tell you, “No, be honest...”, but also wasn’t going to accept it and move on. It was still like that. He knew you were lying, and you knew he knew, no words shared at all.

So you sighed and took a second, and then said, “Josh picked up his key today.”

And you didn’t want to explain what that meant.

Didn’t want to tell Joe that, for a while, this existing-in-two-flats thing had just felt like a bit of a joke. Just the two of you playing and being silly about whatever you really were. You still sort of thought of him as a flatmate because he still came over all the time, and you went over to his all the time too. You existed in the same space almost just as much as before, sort of.

But now a new flatmate was actually moving in, and suddenly, it felt like reality had slapped you right across the cheek like it had done that day that Joe moved out.

You’d gotten to hide away for a lot of that.

And there was no real hiding this time around.

You couldn’t go home and pretend Joe was going to move back in eventually, because now Josh’s things were going to be all over the flat. Which was fine. Josh signed a lease. His things were allowed to be all over the place.

It was just... things were getting real now.

Shit was real.

“Which reminds me,” you suddenly piped up, pushing uncomfortable thoughts down, tucking those away for another time and place. “This is going to save you some money!”

You saw how Joe’s mouth slowly stretched into a smile as he watched how his own feet rubbed against yours. Then he caught himself and quickly furrowed his brow, saying, “No, I don’t think it works like that.”

You copied his expression, but were more confused than anything else.

“Of course it does. Josh signed the papers, he’s going to start paying rent now, you–”

“I said that I had taken care of things, didn’t I?” Joe interrupted you, fingers playing with the folds in your sleeve of the arm that rested over his stomach. “Can’t just not keep a promise like that.”

You blinked at him a second, then moved to sit up to stare at him harder. If both Joe and Josh paid rent, that basically meant that you... got to live for free for a while? That math wasn’t mathing. One plus one wasn’t equalling two here. You looked around Joe’s flat and tried to think of his own expenses, and... what the fuck was he doing?!

“Joe,”

“You’re not going to be able to talk me out of this.”

“Joe.”

Joe ignored you and faked a yawn, sped it up along with stretched out arms above his head and quickly said, “So tired. Bed?” before getting up and leaving you on his sofa as he left the room.

“You’re insane if you think I’m just going to accept that!” you called after him and heard him laugh from down the hall.

“Did you not just say you were after a weird mid-term bonus?”

And you hated how that made you smile. Made you punch one of the cushions and sink your teeth into your bottom lip begrudgingly as you forgot to breathe a second.

Joe smiled to himself too as he turned on the lights in his bathroom. It felt like he was winning a contest - there was no contest, no one to fight, not really, but, he was definitely winning.

“You coming?”

Breathe.

Calm down.

You could pretend to fight him on this once more in the morning.

Crawling into bed with Joe had its own little routine which was different from the one at yours. Different order of things, because the lay out of the flat was different.

Bathroom first. You brushed teeth together, always had to stop Joe when he washed his face too aggressively and then used your own moisturiser on him. “Just for your dry patches,” you’d always say, but would end up swiping delicate fingertips all over anyway. There’d be a snarky comment, of you using too much, of him feeling too greasy, of how he was going to stick to his pillow all night now, and then you’d always kiss him to shut him up before moving on to do your own skincare routine.

When you’d get into bed, Joe would already be in there, giving his phone a last once-over before he’d scoot down and get comfortable.

This time, however, when you walked into his bedroom, the lights were already off, and it looked like Joe was already falling asleep.

This soft man.

So sleepy.

He was all messy curls and bare arms, duvet tucked under them, curled up right in the middle of his bed. You slid in and cuddled up right behind him, hips against his bum, chest to his back.

You were right.

Joe was already falling asleep.

You pushed a leg in between his for warmth and snuck an arm around his front.

“You’re crazy,” you whispered into the skin of his shoulder which prompted Joe to grab hold of your hand and pull it into his chest so you were hugging him properly. The big spoon to his small one. Then he just hummed as you pressed a small kiss to his warm skin there.

“So crazy.” you nuzzled into his pillow, your nose rubbing his back as you did, and you felt how he ducked his head down to press a small kiss to your fingers.

You fell asleep warm, comfortable, and smiling.

You woke up in the same way.

Just on your stomach now, and with Joe’s heavy limbs slung over your body. When you turned over, it woke Joe up, and for five blissful early morning minutes, you tried crawling into each other’s skin as best you could. Breathed each other’s breath and tasted each other’s skin. Stroked hands underneath clothes and had fingers crawling into underwear, just to touch and to hold.

When you quietly asked if Joe wanted coffee, he groaned and told you to shut up. He was able to feel you giggle to that, and he could cry with how happy he felt in that moment. Why would you have to go and ruin it by getting up to go and make coffee?

“Five more minutes.”

“Mmm... it’s never just five.”

Joe sighed, “Just five.” speech slurring with early morning drowsiness and then burrowed himself into you even more.

And fine.

Joe could have five more minutes.

But then they easily turned into twenty, because they always did, and you had to eventually bribe Joe with breakfast for him to let you go so you could sit up.

“If you take a slow shower, I’ll have it ready when you finish.” You looked over your shoulder where Joe, still with his eyes closed, smiled widely. His nose was slightly red from pressing it into your skin, and his bedhead made you have to suppress a giggle that you hid by leaning down to press a kiss to his forehead before you got out.

Joe barely even felt that little grain of bad in his chest when he thought of how much he loved you.

Because he did.

Joe fucking loved you.

There was going to be a moment soon where he was just going to have to say it. It was going to spill out of him in some other way if he wouldn’t simply use the words, he just knew it.

Joe loved you as he watched through squinty eyes how you reached for a pair of white socks of his to borrow.

Loved you as he watched you pull one of his old sweaters over your head before you walked out, bare legs still on show.

Loved you when he stepped into his living room after his shower to the smell of burnt toast and scrambled eggs and coffee.

Loved you as he watched you step onto a chair in the corner of his room, wet dishcloth in hand to remove the strings of dust you had scolded him over the night before.

Loved you as he felt what the sight of your stretched body, your bare tighs, and the little peep of your bum did to him inside of his boxers.

Loved you as he groaned and let his head fall onto the counter, having to breathe through it, because you were just cleaning his living room, and not giving him a sensual striptease act or whatever.

Loved you as you looked back over your shoulder, raising your eyebrows in surprised confusion before accusingly asking, “Really, Joe? Cleaning?”

Loved you as he stutteringly defended the blood rush down south by saying, “You have no idea what you look like right now.” into his elbow where he had to hide his face for a second.

Loved you, loved you.

He was hardly able to deny any of it.

And he didn’t feel that he had to, either.

Because, you were there. In his flat. In his clothes. Cleaning his dusty ceiling corners. And wasn’t that just something he wanted to tell the whole fucking world about?

That small little green grain of doubt and worry and negativity dried out and got no sunshine to really grow into anything. Thank fuck.

He got to ignore it for a while.

Forgot about it entirely, and pretended it wasn’t even there for a bit.

It was easy.

Joe loved you.

He knew he did.

Would tell you soon.

Didn’t know how.

Or where.

But he was going to say it.

He was going to use his words because he was just a normal guy who loved a normal girl and you weren’t being weirdly secretive about what you got up to in private. At least, not how you used to be, anyway.

Joe loved you.

You brought Joe flowers and cleaned his ceiling and wore his clothes and cooked his breakfast.

Joe loved you, even though your new flatmate Josh turned out to be impossibly good-looking in addition to being incredibly kind as well, so Joe didn’t even get to have a real reason to dislike him at all, which seemed unfair, but, all right.

Joe loved you, even when suddenly two shiny black acoustic guitars appeared on your living room wall, because Josh worked in music, and wasn’t that just so cool?

Joe loved you, even though his very first thought after that was, well I know how to play guitar too, don’t I?! which you had never even mentioned before.

Joe loved you, even when he walked into your flat one evening and interrupted a dinner you were having with Josh and one of your friends and, look, Josh cooked for us, and for the first time ever, he felt uninvited and intruding.

Joe loved you, even when your friend jokingly said, “You’re over here at lot for someone that moved out.” right to his face, to which you then heartily laughed, because she was only joking, Joe, and then you didn’t say anything about how you were together, but, you were together... weren’t you?

Joe loved you, even when he stuck to the bit and handed you his flat key like he always did, expecting to find it in his coat pocket later, but then ended up finding both his pockets empty when he went home the next morning, which, yea actually, that made sense, because Josh lived there now, and it was a little weird to have a key still, wasn’t it?

Joe loved you, even when you had told him to come over on Friday evening because you’d had a shit day at work, and for the first time ever, he had to ring the doorbell to get inside.

Joe loved you, even when Josh was the one that answered the door, and Josh almost didn’t let him in, telling him, “Oh, she’s fallen asleep on the sofa, mate.” to which Joe just smiled as he stepped around him, because what the fuck did Josh even know about falling asleep on the sofa in this flat?

Joe loved you, even when he found you asleep on the sofa, curled up under a blanket he’d never seen before, with an empty pizza box bar some crusts still on the coffee table, and you never ate a whole pizza yourself, so that was obviously shared with someone else.

Joe loved you.

He knew he did.

But there was a playstation besides the TV now, and a cool record player on the side, pile of vinyl next to it, and, God.

Joe fucking hated this.

Whatever was inside of Joe’s chest, that thing he didn’t even want in there, was growing.

Was getting fed without Joe even fully realising he was feeding it.

He hated those guitars. He hated that he no longer had a key. He hated that stupid blanket. And he hated that empty pizza box.

Still, he sat down beside you and placed your socked feet onto his lap. Watched the last scenes of whatever film you’d put on as he slowly kneaded a foot and let you sleep, and he tried his best to not get bitten. To not let it sink its teeth in. To not let it hurt.

It was silly.

Joe was being silly.

Rational thought saved him.

Rational thought told him he still loved you.

And he hoped rational thought was going to be enough.

---

The Taglisted

@ali-in-w0nderland, @alwayslindie, @babybluebex, @capricornrisingsstuff, @chaoticgood-munson,

@choke-me-eddie, @demonsanddemogorgons, @did-it-work, @dirtyeddietini, @djoseph-quinn,

@dolcevit4, @eddies-puppet, @emma-munson, @emotionaldreamer, @everythinghasafacee,

@figmentofquinn, @ghost-proofbaby, @ghostinthebackofyourhead, @hanahkatexo, @harringtonfan4,

@hazelenys, @jewellethief, @joesquinns, @keikoraven, @kennedy-brooke,

@lovelyblueness, @manda-panda-monium, @mandyjo8719, @mexicanfolklore, @munsonluvrr,

@munson-mjstan, @nadixq, @nglharry, @notverywise, @pepperstories,

@phyllosilicate-s, @royale1803, @sherrylyn628, @sidthedollface2, @solzi1420,

@songforeddiemunson, @sweetberry47, @take-everything-you-can, @thebellenouvelle, @tlclick73,

@werepartnersnow, @winterwakesthewolf, @witchwolflea, @yelyahcardella, @yunirgo

taglist currently full, sorry

#Joseph Quinn #Joe Quinn #Joseph Quinn x You #Joe Quinn x You #Joseph Quinn x Reader #Joe Quinn x Reader #Joe Quinn Fanfic #Joe Quinn fanfiction #Joseph Quinn Fanfic #Joseph Quinn Fanfiction #joe quinn x y/n #joseph quinn x y/n #icallhimjoey #define close #explain us #reinvent love

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multitrack-drifting · 4 months

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thinking a Lot about Vox's design and how curious it is that he just. doesn't even have a normal head, y'know? how his face is a screen he can, and does, project anything he wants on

i wonder if it represents just how fake of a person he is. throughout the years he changed his way of speaking, his style and outfit, he even found a way to replace his monitor. he constantly introduces new show formats and products. he reinvents and remakes himself again and again and again to capture people's fleeting attention, and yet he fails every single time, because during his numerous public appearances and shows he expresses no genuine personality for his audience to hold onto, so they only watch him for the content he can provide, disregarding Vox himself just as a tool to deliver their entertainment and services, as background noise. this being exactly why he needs to hypnotize his viewers: as a last-ditch effort to retain their attention

i wonder if that's why he needs Velvette and why she views herself as the backbone of their team - her job is making the Vees a media presence, building the parasocial relationship Vox never could. presenting them not as a team of people built on the shared desire for power, but as a friend group their followers can relate to and adore. in reality, Vox probably wouldn't care too much about replacing them for more powerful allies, but in Velvette's posts here they are, the bestest of buddies, with Vox and Valentino having a very public romantic thing going on, despite it being evident from Vox's private acting with Valentino just how much he annoys Vox

i wonder if that is exactly why Vox despises Alastor. the man using his actual real life name in hell, someone who's been in hell for almost a century yet who barely needs to change anything about himself because he's just so effortlessly charming and attention-captivating that he simply doesn't need to. Alastor's podcast is centered on him and people still want to hear more of it. the moment Alastor appears people immediately switch their focus from Vox to him. i wonder if Vox loathes how he can only thrive in absence of Alastor because the moment Alastor comes on air Vox always becomes second best

y'know. i think about it a normal amount. yeah

#hazbin hotel #hazbin vox #hazbin alastor #hazbin velvette #staticradio #fellas is it gay to envy your rival so much you wanna be him

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atimeofyourlife · 5 months

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We've met before, it's different now

written for @steddieholidaydrabbles prompt: modern au | rated: t | wc: 995 | cw: mentions/ fear of transphobia | tags: modern au, tinder au, trans steve harrington, transfem steve harrington, trans eddie munson, transmasc eddie munson, pre steddie, first date, t4t steddie Steph is back in Hawkins for the first time since coming out as trans. Robin convinces her to get back on tinder, where she finds Eddie. He's familiar for some reason, but she can't place why

Steph couldn't place how she felt as she laid on Robin's bedroom floor. It was her first time back in Hawkins since coming out. Since her parents had kicked her out, saying that they would never see her as their daughter, she would have to accept her place as their son, the sole Harrington heir. She'd left with Robin for Chicago, where she could reinvent herself. Become the woman she knew she was. But they were back in Hawkins for Christmas, and Joyce and Hopper's wedding, which was happening early in the new year.

Really, she didn't know how to be Steph in Hawkins. Anyone who was unaware of her transition didn't seem to recognize her, even people she'd been friends with in a different time. She'd been right behind Nicole, a girl she'd once dated, in the grocery store. And Nicole turned and looked her straight in the eye and asked if she was new in town. Mark Lewinsky approached her in the parking lot and offered to take her on a date. And every time someone looked at her, she wanted to make herself smaller. To hide away and put on a mask the way she had in order to survive high school.

Now, she was unsure if she wanted to do anything with her time, or to just hide in Robin's room when she wasn't needed elsewhere.

"Come on. I've updated your Tinder profile with new pics and everything. Even if we just sit here and swipe through everyone. But you never know, you might get something out of it." Robin said, dropping onto the floor next to Steph.

"Fine." Steph rolled her eyes and held her hand out for her phone. She flicked through the photos Robin had chosen. A lot of her favorites, including a thirst trap from the boudoir photo session Robin had gifted her for her birthday, nothing too risque, everything was covered in a bodysuit, but it was a photo that made her feel confident and sexy every time she looked at it. "Okay, lets do it."

The first few were various guys she knew from school, a couple of girls mixed in too. She swiped left on all of them, not that interested. The first one that made her stop wasn't one she was interested in dating. But she was shocked to see Carol Perkins pop up with her interests set to men and women.

"There is no way Carol fucking Perkins is interested in girls." Robin said from where she was looking over Steph's shoulder as she flicked through the photos.

"Tommy's in most of the pictures. I bet they're looking for a third." Steph said, swiping left. "But they know that no self-respecting woman would get into that mess if they knew Tommy was involved, so Carol it is."

"You told me that you had a threesome with them?" Robin asked.

"Yeah, but that was before I knew I was a woman, and at the time I had very little self-respect." Steph replied, and continued swiping.

Robin had got bored of watching Steph swiping through Tinder, so had moved back to her bed to text Vickie. Steph stayed on Tinder, yet to swipe right on anyone, but then one guy caught her eye. A guy with long curly hair, named Eddie. He seemed vaguely familiar, but she couldn't place him. His bio said that he was in a band and played dnd. There was something about him that made her swipe right. She didn't think anything would come from it, and tried not to think on it.

A few hours later, she checked her phone to see a notification from Tinder of there being a match, and Eddie had sent her a message.

Hi. I don't really know what I'm doing with this. I'm back in town for the holidays, and my friends said I should make a profile to try and meet someone. But you are the most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes on.

Steph giggled and blushed at the message. It took her a while to figure out how to respond.

I'm back in town for the holidays as well. My best friend updated my profile for me and said I should start looking even if I swiped left on everyone. You seem pretty cute, and I would love to hear more about this band you play in?

Steph felt that she and Eddie really hit it off, messaging each other for a while everyday. They talked about almost everything, and were even planning a date at Benny's. But Steph couldn't help feeling nervous. What if Eddie couldn't accept her being trans? What if everything went wrong and she got hurt, or outed, or worse?

She decided on a basic outfit, a comfy sweater over jeans. Feeling that anything fancier would make her overdressed for a date at a diner. She still felt nervous, but she was sharing her location with Robin so someone would know if anything went sour.

On the date with Eddie, everything felt so real. Time seemed to fly by, and they were talking for hours. She found out that he was also living in Chicago, so they could continue to see each other.

"I graduated from Hawkins High three years ago. I hated everyday that I was stuck there " Eddie said.

"You graduated a year after me, but your profile said you're a year older than me?" Steph asked, frowning. She still couldn't place him.

"I uh. I got held back a couple times. Shit happened. It was a hard time for me."

"I feel like I should know you, but I don't remember you from school."

"The thing is, I've not always been Eddie." He said, looking nervous. "I had a different name, and I looked a lot different too."

It took a moment for Steph to realize what he was implying. "That's okay. I get it, because I've not always been Steph."

#steve harrington #eddie munson #steddie #steve harrington x eddie munson #steve x eddie #robin buckley #platonic stobin #trans steve harrington #transfem steve harrington #trans eddie munson #transmasc eddie munson #t4t steddie #modern au #tinder au #atimeofyourwrites

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thefallennightmare · 6 months

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Just Pretend-nine

*gif created by me. feel free to use, simply give credit*

Parings: Noah Sebastian x Musician! Reader

Warnings/Tropes: language, angst, fluff, smut, star-crossed lovers, right person/wrong time, cheating, talks of mental abuse.

Summary: “I can wait for years, heaven knows I’m not getting over you.” A story about two star-crossed lovers, that always find their way back because their souls are entwined. The universe desperately attempts to bring them together, no matter what the cost.

Authors Note: PLEASE, we are begging you guys. Take your time with this one, so many different emotions throughout. Its a big fucking deal and read it slow, immerse yourself in this world while listening to the playlist. Enjoy my lovelies. 😉

Collaborating With: @thescarlettvvitch(better give her all the love as well)

Tags: @thescarlettvvitch @ozwriterchick @waake-meee-up @notingridslurkaccount @niicoleleigh @sammyjoeee @xxrainstorm @dominuslunae @notmaddihealy @malice-ov-mercy @crimson-calligraphyx @iknownothingpeople @writethrough @thebadchic @blackveilomens Claudia on Tumblr @tobe-written @blacksoul-27 @loeytuan98 @loverofagoodbeard @comfortcharactercraze @lma1986 @plutonikchaos1 @spicywhenspeaking @lyschko666 @somewhere-diamond

NOAH

"I'm so fucking glad we're staying in a hotel the next few days," Folio groaned as we walked down the long hallway of the hotel.

I nodded in agreement. "I can't believe the tour is almost over; our last show is tomorrow night."

With our last show tomorrow night, we were spending the next few nights in a hotel and we all planned to take flights back home so we could get there faster. Hollow Souls were also staying in this hotel but they were a floor beneath us but it seemed the farther I went from Y/N, those imaginary pull strings inside of my heart tightened. If it hurt this bad when she was a floor underneath, how bad would it hurt when she was a state away?

As far as I knew, she still had plans to go back to Vegas because that's where her home was, granted it was with Trey. There wasn't a part of me that was worried she would go back to him; I knew she wouldn't. Ever since they fired him, Hollow Souls has been thriving. They posted on their social media pages that Trey was kicked out of the band due to personal reasons and while most of their fans complained about them kicking out their main vocalist, there was a select few that were excited to see what the future of Hollow Souls looked like.

Y/N was upset at first that so many of their fans were boycotting them now because they decided to kick Trey out.

"Seems like they only care about Trey's vocals when I'm the one that actually wrote our songs."

It took a while of Malcolm and Chase talking to her to realize that their future together as a band was looking bright. They could reinvent themselves.

I filled in for the last two shows but after playing my set for thirty minutes before their hour-and-a-half set, my voice was getting raw and sore so Matt thought it be best if I didn't fill in for the last show. I was going to argue, not wanting to let them down, but Chase reassured me they'd figure out what to do for the last show.

Y/N has been glowing since Trey left, slowly becoming a better woman in front of all of us; to me, she'd always been perfect. But we could all see her confidence growing. With her face in the dirt far too many times with Trey, she finally said enough; it doesn't hurt anymore. As all of his lies crumbled down, Y/N found a new life.

To say all of us were proud of her was a fucking understatement.

"Hey," Jolly bumped shoulders with mine, pulling me from my thoughts as we stopped in front of the door to his room. "Bryan wants us ready to go in twenty minutes."

Oh, right.

We were currently in Oregon and Bryan planned some time today on our off day to visit one of the national parks here to take some promo photos of us.

"Yeah, I'll be ready to go. I need to change quickly and I'll meet you guys down in the lobby," I said as I walked down a few more doors until I stopped in front of my room; the one I was sharing with Nick.

He patted my shoulder as he walked past me into the room. "You should ask if Y/N wants to come with."

I shrugged off his words, trying not to make it seem that I'd been tossing around the idea for the last hour when Bryan first told us about his plan.

"She might have plans with Chase and Malcolm," I said while tossing my suitcase onto the bed, quickly rifling through the clothes to find something to change into.

"She doesn't. Last I heard, Chase and Malcolm are going out tonight so Y/N will be alone," Nick raised a suggestive brow.

With a long sigh, I turned to face him. "You already planned this, didn't you?"

"It was Chase's idea," he answered.

Rolling my eyes, I pulled out my phone to send a text to Y/N.

Get dressed, I'll be by your room in fifteen minutes.

She responded quickly before I had the chance to set my phone down.

Care to tell me where we're going?

All you need to know is to dress warm, angel.

You're full of surprises. See you soon, mochi. Room 245.

"Mochi?" I chuckled to myself while pocking my phone.

With a smile playing at my lips and my heart pounding loudly in my heart at the nickname, I tossed on a fresh hoodie and my tan jacket, opting to leave my hair down. Nick finished getting dressed when I did and once we stepped out in the hallway, Jolly and Folio were already waiting for us right outside our door.

"Fuck," I cursed while clutching my chest. "You scared the shit out of me, Folio."

"Too busy thinking about Y/N, huh?" He gave a playful smile.

Shoving him on the shoulder, I mentioned we needed to stop by her room before heading down to the lobby.

Jolly adjusted the guitar bag on his back. "She's coming with?"

I hesitantly nodded. "Is that alright? Nick said she was alone, and I felt bad if we left her while we did something."

They all smirked at my rambling as we took the stairs down one floor, our footsteps echoing in the small confined space.

"Of course it is, we don't mind when she tags along," Jolly said.

Coming to a stop in front of door 245, I gently rapped my knuckles against it and waited for her petite voice to carry through the wood. It was silent for a few moments, nerves ate away at my stomach as I wondered why she wasn't answering yet.

I knocked once again, this time with a bit more force, and breathed a little when a loud curse sounded from the other side.

"Hang on, someone's at the door."

I looked over to Nick with a raised brow, and he merely shrugged. "Chase and Malcolm are gone so I don't know who she's talking to."

The door opened with a quick brush of air, and my heart skipped a beat at the sight in front of me. Y/N was dressed in a pair of black tights, and a deep orange sweater that rested to the middle of her thighs, and her hair was pulled back in a high ponytail. I had to resist the urge to wrap my fingers through it to pull her back to me as she turned back into the room.

"Give me two minutes, I have to get my shoes," She said while clutching her phone to her ear. "No, Dad. Not you. I've got plenty of time to talk."

While the rest of the guys hung out in the hallway, I leaned against the wall right next to her bed and watched her as she slipped on her typical Doc Martin, nodding every so often to something her dad was saying on the other end of the phone.

"Dad, you seem to forget that you're seventeen hours ahead of me right now," she laughed causing my heart to flutter. "It's only noon here. Wait, why are you calling me so early? Isn't it your day off?"

She paced around the room looking for something and realizing what it was; I grabbed her bag and slung it over my shoulder. "I got it."

Y/N smiled her thanks before the conversation with her dad took her attention again. "No, I haven't talked to Mom in a while…. well, the last time she tried to guilt trip me into staying with her when the tour was over…I'm not staying at Trey's place anymore. We broke up.…..yea, long time coming, tell me about it….I'm sure I'll figure it out but I'm not staying in Vegas anymore…..hell yes I'm keeping Salem; asshole doesn't do shit for my cat."

I couldn't ignore the way my stomach flipped hearing that she didn't plan on staying in the same state as Trey.

"I can't move in with Malcolm or Chase because they're actually finding their own place together…Dad, they're dating; have been for the last six months…Yeah, that will explain exactly why Chase and I never got together."

I chuckled as I thought of her dad trying to set up her and Chase.

"You saw videos from the show last night?" There was a clear shock in her voice as she continued to talk with her dad as she rushed around the room getting ready.

"I'm surprised because you don't even know how to work face time," she giggled. "Oh, he's a friend of ours. We've been touring with his band for the last few weeks. Yeah, he filled in the last couple of shows….you think so? That's what everyone is saying online."

Her gaze flicked up to mine as her lips parted slightly, whatever her dad said made her give a long pause.

"Just a friend, dad." Then she turned swiftly on her heels away from me to whisper something low into the phone.

"I'm sorry," she mouthed to me with a pulled expression as she looked over her shoulder..

I waved her off. "Take your time."

"Dad, you know I miss you but I can't move to Japan; not now. But yes, I promise to visit you as soon as I can."

Eventually, after another minute, she said goodbye before hanging up with an audible groan. "Don't get me wrong, I love my dad but sometimes he forgets we talk almost every other day. He wants a play-by-play of my life every time."

"He wants you to visit?" I questioned.

She nodded while slipping into a jacket. "Yeah but its hard to find time. You need more than a weekend to visit Japan; there's so much to do."

"Yeah," I pushed her hand away when she went to reach for her bag. "I've got it."

"Noah, you don't have to carry my bag," she chuckled.

I shrugged. "I don't mind. Ready?"

"Yep," she smiled that heart-stopping smile.

When she walked past me towards the open door, my fingers grazed the inside of her wrist to stop her.

"Mochi?" I asked.

"Yes," she responded immediately. "Because you're the sweetest and your tummy is soft."

She poked her finger into my stomach before letting out a loud shriek of laughter as I wrapped an arm around her shoulders to bring her into my embrace, the both of us walking to the doorway where the guys were waiting.

"Malcolm and Chase are going to meet us once they're finished with their date," Y/N said.

"I'll text them the address," Nick said while pulling out his phone.

"Where are we headed?"

"The mountains," Folio answered with a smile.

"Ooh," she slipped out of my embrace, much to my dismay, to rummage around her suitcase for a book before she came back to me, lifting my arm and throwing it over her shoulder once again. "Now I'm ready."

Resisting the urge to press a kiss to her forehead, I set my sunglasses over my eyes and pulled her along with me as she let the door close behind us and ignored the smug look Nick threw my way as we walked past him; Y/N wrapping an arm around my back.

NOAH

"Can you believe how many people are calling for us to collaborate? It's all over Twitter," Nick said while browsing on his phone.

"Shit, really?" Y/N peered over from the back seat so she could gaze down at Nick's phone, who sat in front of her.

I was driving the van to the location that Bryan chose for our photo shoot but Folio called shotgun before she could which earned a cute little pout on her lips; lips that I wanted so bad to taste once again. So she sat in the far back with Jolly while Nick and Bryan sat in the middle. It was weird not having Chase or Malcolm with us since we did everything together on our off days.

"What are they saying?" I wondered while keeping my eyes on the road.

"Fans want you to feature on Hollow Souls next album," Y/N grinned as our eyes locked in the rearview mirror for a few seconds.

I hummed while pulling the van to a stop at the park's entrance. "I'm around whenever you need me, angel."

Once we all piled out, I met Jolly and Bryan at the back of the van to help them unload the equipment while Y/N chatted quietly with both of the Nicks, and out of the corner of my eye; I marveled at how goddess-like she looked with the afternoon sun casting her with her own aura glow. Jolly caught me staring because he smacked my chest before handing me the guitar he brought.

"You could ask her out, ya know," Bryan smirked.

I snapped my gaze over to him. "I can't."

"Why not? It's clear she feels the same since she's here right now," he said.

A long sigh fell from my lips as I ran a hand over my face. "It's not that easy, guys."

Bryan rolled his eyes and then hung his camera from his neck. "I mean you've already kissed, how much easier could things be between you two?"

"You told him?" I seethed at Jolly, who held up his hands.

"I didn't say anything. You two give it away with all the romantic googly-eye shit," he chuckled while he and Bryan began walking up the long trail toward the top of the mountain where we planned on taking the pictures.

"Hey," Y/N smiled as she bounded up next to me. "Little photo shoot?"

Immediately the scowl that followed Byran and Jolly turned into a warm smile, matching Y/N's, and I nodded. We began walking step in step, hands brushing against each other every so often, and I nearly linked fingers with her more than once. However, when we reached some rocky terrain while walking up a hill, Y/N cursed herself for not wearing smarter shoes.

"Here," I bent low in front of her and patted to my back.

"No, you're not carrying me," she tried to laugh it off, but I knew she was nervous about me carrying her weight on my back.

"Angel."

I peered over my shoulder in time to see her place her hands low on her hips.

"Mochi," she teased back with a small smirk.

My heart skipped a long beat at hearing the nickname again. It sounded so fucking sweet falling from her lips; almost as much as my actual name sounded.

"We can do this the easy way or the hard way," I said, still bent low at my knees.

Y/N pulled at the bottom of her sweater dress. "I don't want to give these bozos a show."

She threw a thumb over her shoulder towards both Nick's who walked a few paces behind her. I rose to my knees and gave her a suggestive smirk while closing the distance between us.

"What color are they?"

"Uh," Y/N stammered but quickly recovered. "A cute olive green. Looks great against my skin tone."

A low noise vibrated in the back of my throat and I stood straighter as Folio walked passed just in time to feel the growing sexual tension.

"Either you hop on his back or I will," he joked as he and Nick walked passed us.

She stared up at me and slowly licked her lips, an action I watched carefully through my sunglasses. "Noah?"

"Yes, angel?"

"You have a cute nose," her voice was quiet, and I thought I misheard her.

I titled my head to the side. "My nose?"

"Yeah. It's just the perfect size for your facial structure," she finished with a boop to my nose.

I scrunched up my face. "Did-did you just boop my nose?"

"See!" She pointed to my face. "You look so fucking cute; it's insane."

"Angel, literally," I breathed a low chuckle.

"Mochi, literally," she mocked while sticking her tongue out.

My fingers itched to grab it but Bryan's loud voice echoed through the trees from far ahead. "Let's go you losers! You're holding us up."

I swear to-.

"What will it be, angel?" I asked.

Y/N dramatically sighed before motioning for me to spin around, which I did with a quick wink.

"If you drop me, I swear to Hades," She grumbled while adjusting her dress.

The warmth radiated from her in giant waves as her legs wrapped around my sides and I hooked my arms underneath her thighs to hoist her up.

"I swear to Hades that I will not drop you," I promised while walking up the steep hill towards the rest of the guys. "Do you actually pray to the Greek Gods?"

She flicked my ear. "No, silly. I just like to joke around with them. They're my favorite mythology."

"Will you teach me about them?

"I'm honored you asked; I'd love to," she ran her fingers through my long hair and I briefly let my eyes flutter shut at the calming feeling.

"Only if you let me braid your hair."

My eyes snapped open. "Uh, we'll see about that."

She flicked my ear again. "You're no fun."

Hooking her tighter against me, I closed the distance between us and the guys in a few long strides. Nick gave the two of us a look as I set Y/N down gently on her feet, she quickly pulling down her dress.

"You didn't see shit," she pointed a firm finger to all of us.

"Nope."

"Nothing."

"I have no idea what you're talking about," Bryan held up his camera and snapped a few pictures of Y/N; who in return, flipped him the finger.

I watched with a racing heart as she messed around with the guys, almost as if she'd been part of our little group for years.

"Alright," Y/N pulled the book out of her bag. "I'll let you guys do your thing. If you need me, I'll be reading over there."

She pointed to the edge of the mountain that looked over the small lake we drove past to get here.

"Be careful, angel," I warned.

"I'll be fine," Y/N rolled her eyes but as she turned, she tripped over a rock and stumbled a bit before standing straight.

I raised a teasing brow at her while crossing my arms over my chest. "What was that?"

"Fuck you," she taunted with her middle finger.

Don't tempt me, angel.

The next hour passed in a blur as we took countless pictures, just having a fun, relaxing time. Every so often, my gaze would fall onto Y/N as she leaned up against a large willow tree, book perched in her lap. The wind blew through her ponytail every so often and I marveled at how fucking breathtaking she looked when her face would scrunch in surprise with whatever she was reading.

I knew from the moment I stepped off our bus the first day of the tour when I saw her standing amongst the group; when we first met. It wasn't the typical love at first sight bullshit Folio talks about that happens in the movies. It was more like a familiarity, almost like 'oh, hello. It's you. It's always going to be you.'

"Noah, could you take a little step forward," Bryan directed.

Snapping my gaze away from Y/N reluctantly, I followed Bryan's orders for another long few minutes until he decided we got enough pictures. I motioned towards Y/N, who still had her nose perched in her book, and Bryan knew what I silently was saying because he snapped a few pictures of her.

Malcolm and Chase walked up just as we finished our photoshoot so a quick idea came to my mind.

"Angel," I called.

She looked up. "Hm?"

Not saying anything, I waved her, Malcolm, and Chase over to our position which they did hesitantly.

"If Bryan is cool with it," I pointed to him. "What do you guys say for a Hollow Souls photoshoot? New and reimagined?"

Bryan immediately agreed. "Let me change out some things and we can get started.

Chase and Malcolm also agreed with a nod. "I think it'll be good for us."

"You guys don't have to do this for us," Y/N stated. "You've already done so much for us, Noah by filling in."

I shrugged while stuffing my hands deep into the pockets of my jeans. "I take care of the people I care about."

She pondered my words for a long moment and eventually let out a long breath. "Alright fine."

Once Bryan returned, the rest of stepped back to give them space to work. Nick was the only one who watched me as Jolly, Folio, and I kept our eyes on Hollow Souls. We grabbed a few beers from the cooler Jolly packed and was nursing them slowly.

"You know, this would be a perfect opportunity to maybe slip away just the two of you," Nick whispered.

I peered over to him and rolled my eyes, shoving him in the shoulder. "Whatever."

"I'm just saying," he held up his hands in defense. "A night under the stars in the mountains. Anybody would kill for a date like that."

Nick's words weighed heavily on my brain and when she began walking towards me, I made the haste decision by grabbing the guitar that was leaning against the tree.

"Hi," Y/N smiled as I met her halfway.

My heart warmed at the sight.

"Do you want to go somewhere more secluded, just the two of us?" I suggested with a hopeful smile.

I didn't want to think how I would feel if she rejected me and walked away from me.

"Sure," she answered quickly with a glimmer shining in her eyes.

Ultimately, after walking for a few minutes, we decided on an area far from the rest of the group down the water's edge. We sat down in the sand, our knees brushing against each other, and held the guitar in my lap as I watched her stare out into the vast distance of the water. There was a faraway look in the depths of her eyes as she messed with something on her wrist, fiddling it between her fingers.

A hair tie; the one I gave her the last time we were on the beach together. I wondered where it went but decided that I never wanted it back. It's hers to keep; along with everything else I gave her.

"How are you doing, angel?" I asked, breaking the growing silence.

She didn't look at me, kept her eyes straight ahead.

"I'm-." A hesitant breath. "I'm not sure. I want to believe I'm doing okay with the breakup of not only my relationship but also the band. For the longest time, Hollow Souls was the four of us and we released three records together. The future scares the shit out of me. Can the three of us reinvent a new Hollow Souls or do we need to find someone to replace Trey completely?"

I strummed a few random notes on the guitar; the melody echoing into the sounds of the waves.

"I think a fresh start in all aspects is good for you," I answered slowly, trying to get my thoughts and words right. "I've said it from the start, you're the heart and soul of this band, Y/N. The screams were a bonus. It didn't make or break you guys."

She finally looked towards me and her eyes darted over every inch of my face, wondering if my words were the truth. With her, they always were.

"I don't know what I'd do without you, mochi. Truly."

I scrunched up my face to show that the nickname wasn't my favorite but deep down, my insides were floating in pure bliss having her call me something so disgustingly cute. If any of the guys heard it, though, they would give me shit until the end of my days.

"Ditto, angel, ditto."

I tried to play it cool, sauvé, and chill. My typical demeanor was chipping like ice though, the fear of what would happen if it broke completely had its vise grip on me. No one has ever considered a fuckin a nickname for me, not one without a punchline. Not one without a groan or a cursed tantrum that followed. I wasn’t sure if the pure bliss I was feeling was normal, but who the hell wants normal? Hearing it come from her lips meant everything to me.

"Let's play something," I motioned to the guitar.

"Ooh, what do you have in mind?" She asked while turning her body to face me completely head-on and letting her hair flow as she took it out of the ponytail.

The view of her sitting in front of me with the waves crashing behind her, the setting sun's rays breaking over the horizon stole the breath from my chest.

"Only Love," I answered without an ounce of hesitation.

Y/N's nose scrunched up with confusion and I'd be lying if I said it wasn't the cutest fucking thing ever.

"Noah, that was a demo song from three years ago."

I shrugged and played the first few notes of the song. "Might be silly to some but to me, it means a lot."

It was true. I listened to that song on repeat when it first came out. It was the first song I heard by Hollow Souls and Y/N's voice captivated my heart with its claws. I remember laying on the pullout couch next to Nick in his bedroom as I stayed there yet again. My mind was racing with only one thought.

I have to fucking make it. I needed to buy my own couch that brought a sense of comfort and security I yearned for.

That's when her soft voice came through my headphones and it shocked me to hear a feminine voice after Of Mice and Men. I brushed the hair away from my eyes as I settled deeper into the couch and let Y/N's angelic voice lull me to sleep that night and far too long after.

Cut to three years later and the girl who wrote that song is here in front of me. Some may call it a ‘rockstar crush. Would she be considered that? Who the hell knows? All I know is that I had pent-up memories, and needed to hear that sweet voice sing it, just for me all these years later.

Y/N's real, right there in front of me.

"I'm shocked you remember that song."

"Why wouldn't I? You talked about it being on the cloud during that one livestream," I answered.

Her eyes doubled. "You watched the livestream?"

"Twice."

A red hue brushed across the soft skin of her face as she tilted her head down towards the sand, long hair covering her face.

"No," I brushed away the hair behind her ear. "Don't hide your beautiful face, angel. I want to see all of you if you'd let me."

"Sorry," she muttered under her breath. "I don't even realize I do it."

"Don't apologize. Never apologize to me. Just understand that this is how I see you. Now, enough sadness. Sing for me, angel."

She looked up at me through lashes with a small smile. "Do you know how to play it?"

I snorted, a little hurt that she would doubt me, but proved her wrong as I played the opening part of the song.

"I told you I watched the stream twice."

"Okay," she nodded. "Where did you want me to start?"

"Sing the whole song for me. Please?" I begged.

"You want me to sing the whole song?"

"I do," I rushed out.

Y/N gave a curt nod. “Okay, I’ll play the whole thing- but only because you asked me too, no one else gets the privilege.”

I playfully narrowed my eyes at her. “They better not.”

She took a deep breath while shutting her eyes as I played the tune on the guitar.

"I’m hoping you weren’t heaven sent cause only hell knows where you’ve been. Your built composure’s wearing thin and all your walls are caving in. Before you shut this down, I just wanna lift you up. I’ll take all this love I found and I hope that it’s enough."

We both could hear the ache in our hearts as it bled out, the lyrics mean so fucking much right now.

"Now don’t you shut this down. Ooh no don’t you give this up. I took all this love I found and I hope that it’s enough. Is it enough? If we don’t bend, then this might break. Please don’t give into this pain. Just keep on counting down the days and dream of me to keep you safe."

Y/n opened her eyes to meet mine, a blaze of passion that cut deep into my bones.

"Before you came around I was lost and out of place. You’re the only love I found and I’m hoping that you’ll stay. Please stay."

As we played on together in perfect harmony, there was one thing bright in clear in my mind: I'd stay for as long as she let me.

"Fuck," she breathed. "I forgot how much I loved singing this song."

I nodded in agreement while setting the guitar down next to me. "It's one of my favorites. It's actually what got me into Hollow Souls. I'd been hooked on your voice since that first night on Nick's couch all those years ago when I first heard it."

Y/N beamed when an idea struck her with such force, she stumbled to her feet. "I have to talk with Chase and Malcolm about something."

She took off a few steps in front of me, clearly excited about this idea she had. As we reached the rest of the guys, Y/N made a beeline toward Chase to tell him about her idea while I walked up to Nick and Folio, the former giving me a look.

"So my date idea was good, huh?" He playfully jabbed my side.

I pushed him away with a groan of embarrassment. "Fuck off, Nicholas."

"Oh, he pulled out the full name," Folio teased.

Jolly and Bryan joined us as we finished packing up the van and when I glanced over to Y/N, I noticed Malcolm pinching her cheeks playfully and she smacked his hands away, her cheeks flushed with her own embarrassment and large smile.

NOAH

"Oh wow, look at all of these beautiful people tonight!" Y/N's voice carried through the sold-out arena.

It was the last show of tour and Hollow Souls just took the stage for their set. We could feel the nerves radiate off of all three of them all the way where we stood on the stage to watch them. This was new what they planned on doing tonight but the three of them spent the rest of last night after we parted ways at the hotel and all morning and afternoon today practicing nonstop a new setlist. They wanted to show everyone tonight the first step towards the new Hollow Souls.

"Where's Noah?!" a voice yelled from the crowd.

Jolly chuckled from beside me. "Think they'll be upset you don't show up tonight?"

I ran a hand through my hair and sighed. "I hope not. This is something that they need to prove they can do. The fans need to have faith in Hollow Souls."

"Well, about that," Malcolm spoke into his microphone while adjusting his bass strap.

"Now before you all start booing us off the stage," Chase spoke next from his spot above on his makeshift drum stage. "Noah has been fucking killing it not only with Bad Omens this tour but also helping us out a lot. But tonight, we wanted to do something a little different. We still have our guitar tech filling in for us!"

The crowd cheered for their guitar tech, which made him give an awkward wave.

"I know this may take getting used to, but we appreciate your support in doing what’s right for us and our band," Y/N said. "It means so fucking much to all of us you still showed up tonight even knowing Trey is no longer with us. For that, we're going to give you a kick ass show you deserved. Don't give up on Hollow Souls. We cut out the disease and are ready to fucking blossom."

Y/N peered over to me and with a small wave and wink, she sang the first few lyrics of Only Love.

NOAH

Darkness cascaded over my sleeping form, a brush of moonlight breaking through the curtains pulled tight in our hotel room, and I buried myself deeper into the cocoon of blankets. Sleep was within my grasp and after the last few weeks, the thought of finally being able to sleep in my own bed back at home made it that much easier to grasp it.

Until my phone buzzed from its place on the nightstand and my hand smacked around until it grabbed it. Through hazy vision, I blinked a few times for the words to clear.

Hey, are you awake?-Angel.

I sat up in bed and rubbed away the rest of the sleep from my eyes. It only meant one thing when someone texted you the typical you up text.

Yeah, couldn't sleep.

Bullshit, you were seconds away from waking up Nick with your snoring.

I stared at the bubbles that appeared on my screen and then disappeared, only to reappear right before her next text came through.

Would it be alright if I came by to hang out? Or is it too late?

The clock at the top of my screen showed it was just before midnight.

Not at all. I've got snacks, and we can finally finish watching Spirited Away. Room 392

Be there in five minutes. I'll bring some goodies too! :)

I chucked a pillow at Nick, who was fast asleep in his bed, but when he remained sleeping, I threw another. Eventually, he groaned, slowly waking up.

"You need to leave." I scrambled out of bed and pulled away the blankets from Nick. "Y/N's coming by to hang out."

Nick smoothed down his bedhead, a sly smirk on his lips. "You're kicking me out right now?"

"Fuck yes I am. Go bunk with Bryan or Matt," I said while changing out of my old gray sweats for a pair of black joggers, opting to put on a shirt.

He yawned before grabbing the things he would need and dragged his feet to the door, sending a text to whoever he bunked with.

"Be safe!" Nick called out before the door shut behind him.

With seconds to spare, I quickly tidied up the room then set up a variety of snacks and pulled up the movie on my laptop, setting it on the bed just in time for a soft knock to sound on the door. I let out a few deep calming breaths and did a quick once over of myself in the mirror.

"Hi," I smiled once I opened the door.

Y/N's eyes grazed over every inch of me as she shifted on her feet in the doorway, clutching a bag close to her chest. She was dressed in a pair of sleep shorts and an oversized shirt.

"Do you always sleep shirtless?" she asked with a raised brow.

I stepped to the side, allowing her to step inside the room. "Every hotel room I sleep in can't get any colder than seventy degrees. I need it to be at least sixty-eight. I run hot when I sleep and the guys know not to mess with the thermostat back home."

"Wow, good to know. I'll keep my hands to myself when I come over," she wiggled her fingers after setting her bag down on the couch.

Please don't.

I peeked a brow. "When you come over?"

"Oh, if you thought you saw the last of me because the tour is over, you're wrong," she fell onto the couch with a huff of breath. "I'm moving to Los Angeles."

My heart thumped loudly in my chest but I did my best to hide my excitement when I sat next to her.

"You are?" I questioned.

She nodded with that room-brightening smile. "I had a long talk with Chase and Malcolm tonight and we thought it is best. With us trying to reinvent Hollow Souls it'd be good if we were together for the writing process. Malcolm already found a place big enough for us and while he's going there to get things ready, Chase is flying back with me to Vegas to help me pack my things."

I shifted in my seat, resting my arm against the back of the couch, behind Y/N. "Do you think Trey will be there?"

"Probably but that's why Chase is coming with me; in case things go south."

"I could come too if you'd like," I stumbled over my words only slightly.

Y/N rested a hand on my knee and squeezed it. "You need to stop worrying so much about me, Noah. I can't ask you to change your plans for something I should do on my own."

"You're worth it, angel," I vowed while running a finger through the soft waves of her hair.

We stayed in that position for a minute longer, simply staring into each other's eyes, and when I ran my tongue over my bottom lip, Y/N let out a soft whine. The thick tension that always seemed to be around us intensified now, and it was almost hard to breathe, let alone keep my thoughts off the way her hand grazed a few inches higher on my thigh.

I cleared my throat while nodding to the bag next to her. "What did you bring?"

"Oh," she snapped out of her trance and set it on her lap. "Last tour, I started this tradition on the final night I celebrate by doing self-care."

She pulled out an array of masks and different colors of nail polish and then set them on the small coffee table in front of us.

"Sweet, hand me one," I nodded towards the masks.

"You do masks?" Y/N giggled.

"What, you think I get this perfect skin with just water?" I jeered with a smile.

For the next while, we sat with our face masks on and watched the movie on the small screen of my laptop. It took almost no convincing from her to paint my nails black; her choosing a burgundy color for her nails. But now, what she was trying to convince of me gave me a slight pause.

"I don't know, angel. I don't let just anyone touch my hair," I said while putting away my laptop, us finishing the movie.

Y/N moved to the chair that sat in the room's corner and had her legs spread wide. "It's a good thing I'm not anyone. Now, get your ass over here and let me braid your hair."

For added effect, she pouted her bottom lip out and gave me those big doe eyes.

"Fine," I sighed before sitting on the floor between her legs, my back to her.

I shivered under her touch as she raked her fingers through my hair to break apart the small knots that gathered while I slept earlier.

"So, which Greek God is your favorite?" I asked.

She hummed. "Without a doubt, Medusa. Her story is tragic and sometimes often told wrong but that's the thing with mythology; there are so many different versions, you just have to choose which one you believe more."

"Medusa is the one with the snake hair, right?"

"Yeah," she turned my head to the left as she began braiding that side. "Some stories said she was an original gorgon sister but recent tellings from Ovid say she was a beautiful maiden who worked in Athena's temple. Poseidon saw her from afar and just like Zeus always did, Poseidon decided he wanted Medusa. He had sex with her on the temple steps and Athena punished her by turning her into the gorgon with snake hair and cursed any man to turn to stone when they looked at her."

I whistled low. "Shit, Greek gods were assholes."

Y/N snorted. "You don't even know the half of it."

Once she finished the left side, she turned my head to the right so she could start on that side.

"How'd her story end?"

"In tragedy, like every other myth. Perseus was sent to behead her by King Polydectes of Seriphus because Polydectes wanted to marry Perseus's mother. The gods were well aware of this, and Perseus got help. He received a mirrored shield from Athena, sandals with gold wings from Hermes, a sword from Hephaestus, and Hades's helm of invisibility."

"Wait," I turned to look up at her, which made her chastise me because I messed up the braid. "Athena, who turned her into this monster, helped the guy who was sent to kill her?"

"Fucked up, I know."

With stern hands, she turned my head to the right again. "Since Medusa was the only one of the three Gorgons who was mortal, Perseus could slay her; he did so while looking at the reflection from the mirrored shield he received from Athena. During that time, Medusa was pregnant by Poseidon so when Perseus beheaded her, Pegasus, the winged horse, and Chrysaor, a giant wielding a golden sword, sprang from her body."

"Oh Pegasus, from the Disney Hercules," I noted.

"That movie is so wrong but what do you expect for a kids' movie," Y/N chuckled then slapped her thighs. "All finished."

She showed me my reflection through her camera on her phone and I couldn't stop the smirk that pulled at my lips.

"I'll have to admit, angel. I look good with braids," I admitted while snatching her phone from her.

"Hey, what are you doing?!" She asked while reaching for it.

I leaned far back from her and posed for a few selfies. "I thought you'd like an updated selfie of me. I know you have the other two I sent you a few weeks ago."

With a red face, she snatched her phone back and held it close to her chest. "I do not."

Bullshit.

"Right, then let me see your pictures," I teased while kneeling in front of her, hands resting on her thighs, her skin ablaze with heat.

She swallowed thickly. "Fuck you, Sebastian."

READER

I swallowed thickly while clutching my phone to my chest, knowing that he was correct about saving those two selfies he sent me before.

"Are you going to look at the selfie I took?" Noah taunted.

With a breath, I peered down at the phone only to suck in a large breath, body shivering underneath his warm touch on my thighs.

"That's your new contact picture, mochi," I smirked while setting it and leaned deeper in the couch, not realizing that I pressed my core closer to Noah's face.

His eyes burned as his gaze darted from between my legs up to my face and his tongue darted out to wet his lips, almost imagining the taste.

"Angel," his voice was deep, it rumbling in his chest.

All the heat shot straight to my pussy as it clenched with desire, something that always happened when around Noah. Before, I took care of myself with this exact image in my mind but now that it was about to happen made me buzz with excitement.

"Can I?" He asked while breathing over my lap.

I raised my hips towards his face, all morals or thoughts if this was the best idea flew out of the window. We waited long enough for this moment ever since we shared that kiss so long ago. I wasn't a religious person at all but fuck, did I pray to Aphrodite about this moment countless times.

"Please," the word choked out on my lips.

With a low growl, Noah pulled me off of the chair and tossed me onto the bed before he crawled between my spread legs. His long fingers hooked the waistband of shorts and panties pulling them off in almost a quick snap and when blazed eyes stared down at my bare pussy, I tried to close my legs.

"Don't," Noah demanded while gripping my thighs tight to spread my legs again. "Don't hide a fucking thing from me, angel."

Shit.

"I've never actually-," The words died on my lips when I felt embarrassed about what I was about to say.

Noah leaned over me. "Wait, are you going to say what I think you're going to say?"

I turned my head away from him. "He never wanted to go down on me."

Noah cursed while cupping my chin so I could meet his gaze. "Don't think about him, angel. Just lay back and enjoy this."

I did my best to nod in his grasp. "Okay."

He suddenly crashed his lips to mine in a fiery, passionate kiss, as he forced his tongue past my lips to taste every inch of my mouth and I moaned into it, nails scratching against the bare skin of his chest. Noah's teeth dragged over my bottom lip as his hand dragged down my side to slide up underneath my shirt, fingers pinching at my nipples.

"Noah," I breathed while breaking apart from the kiss.

He buried his face into the crook of my neck to breathe me in. "Say it again."

I did, over and over like a mantra, as he left a mark on the skin of my neck while his hand switched to the other breast, mimicking his actions from before. The wetness that pooled between my legs was almost a new feeling, never being this turned one, and for a moment I wondered if it would be alright; no pain.

Noah helped me sit up so he could pull my shirt over my head and soon was laying bare in front of him, hair sprawled around my head.

"Fuck, angel. You're fucking beautiful."

For the longest time, I was told something different from how I looked. So hearing the truth and sincerity from Noah made me almost close my legs in front of him. But with his tight grip on my hips to keep me locked against the bed, I knew he could read my thoughts.

"Don't go there. Stay here with me," he said before his lips pressed over every inch of skin from my lips to my chest, down my stomach, and stopped right about my pussy.

I whined the smallest of sobs when Noah took his time, lips ghosting over me. By now I was almost begging and when I finally felt the wet flick of his tongue against my clit, I breathed out a shaky curse. Noah pressed the fullness of his tongue against my lips, licking me up from the bottom to the top, spreading my legs wider apart. I bit my hand to keep the noises at bay.

"I want to hear you," he left a gentle bit on the inside of my thigh.

"Fuck," I moaned when his tongue speared inside of me for a few strokes.

My hands now grasped at the blanket beneath me as I raised my hips farther into his mouth, his lips wrapping around my clit to bite and suck at the bundle of nerves. I always thought my Gspot was in my clit because it was hard to have an orgasm any other way than rubbing myself. Without even telling Noah this, it was as if he knew exactly what my body needed.

It happened so fast, before I knew it he was devouring me like a dying man. I’ve never felt euphoria until now; this must be how it feels to see the moon, the moon that changes its orbit. He had me spinning.

"I love the way you taste, angel." Noah broke away from my clit for a second before diving back it.

The familiar feeling of an orgasm built in my stomach, the tension pulling so fucking tight it was seconds away from snapping. My spine tingled with anticipation as my body tensed, knees shaking underneath Noah as he rubbed his tongue in faster but shorter circles, moaning with the taste that lingered on his lips.

"N-noah. 'M so close," I let my head fall back deeper into the mattress.

"Let go, I've got you."

With a strangled breath, I let the orgasm crash through me like a tsunami, a bright white light edging at the corners of my eyes while Noah licked me through the last few aftershocks. As my breathing calmed, I lifted my head in time to see him stand to his feet, stepping out of his joggers only to stand in front of me in his black briefs.

I licked my lips when I saw his cock straining against the confines of the material until he palmed himself in a few strokes.

"Do you want me to stop?" He asked.

I shook my head with desperation clear in my voice. "No, please. I need this-I need you, Noah."

He cursed before sliding off his briefs with desperation and urgency, his hard cock springing against his thigh, and I nearly died at that sight alone. All of my imagination did nothing compared to the real thing, and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared for a few different reasons. Sex with Trey was uncomfortable but with Noah's size, I feared it would only hurt. The only saving grace was that he worked me open and the added wetness would make up for the slight pain.

"Are you on anything?" Noah asked while kneeling between my legs.

A lot of different shit.

"No," I said.

He leaned over to a bag that lay at the foot of the bed and rummaged around for a few seconds before retrieving a condom. I watched with anticipation as pre-cum seeped out of the slit when he ripped it open and slid it over his length then perched himself between my legs again, the head of his cock pressing gently against me. He wrapped one of my legs around his hip then slowly, sunk deep inside of me, and I bit my tongue hard to keep my strangled cry quiet. I knew there was going to be some pain; it was inevitable, but I didn't expect it to feel so good either.

"Fuck," Noah rested his forehead against my collarbone. "So tight."

He didn't move at first, relishing in the way I felt gripping his cock, and I couldn't take it anymore; I needed him to move.

"Noah," I begged while grinding against him.

One hand gripping my thigh, the other was placed next to my head to keep himself supported as he finally moved his hips in slow, deep strokes.

"Faster," I panted, almost pleading.

Slow was good but right now I needed fast.

Noah accepted my pleas and began slamming into me with such force, I cried out in name with a mixture of pleasure and pain. My hand slipped between our bodies to rub at my clit, hoping that the sensation would ease the pain a bit, but it could only do so much.

He noticed something was wrong with the way my face contorted in pain. "Angel, do you want to get on top?"

"Fuck yes, please."

Still buried deep inside of me, Noah rolled our bodies so now I was straddling him and almost immediately, the pain subsided; it was still there but not as strong. My hands sprawled over the tattoos that covered his chest as I leaned down to lick my way across the snake and apple on his neck. The noise he made, and his moans were so soft as my hot tongue went up and down his neck, I grazed over his Adam's apple with my teeth and bit down. Noah shook underneath me as he wrapped an arm around my back to hold me closer, burying his thick, aching cock, deeper inside of me.

We felt the rush, the aching, burning blush. We surrendered to the touch. I gave him a show. This is heaven in hiding.

"Angel," he begged as my teeth worked on leaving a mark against the hand on his neck. "I need-."

"What do you need?" I ground my hips against his pelvis and the sensation sent sparks to my clit and I clenched around him.

"Fuck," he cursed. "Don't stop what you're doing. It feels so good."

"Oh," I bit down on a new patch of skin on his throat. "This?"

"Yes," he dragged out the S for a few seconds.

My hands went to run through his hair but I almost forgot in our haste that I braided it a few minutes before this.

"Angel," Noah's voice was raw. "You have no idea how much I've wanted you."

I sat up slowly to stare down at him in awe as his words made me feel unspeakable things.

In one quick action, his hand snaked behind my head to pull my lips back down to him to kiss me feverishly.

"Noah," I tugged on his braids.

"Shit, give me a minute. I can take them out."

I didn't stop moving my hips against him. "Noah. I-."

"Just second, angel."

His hands left their vice grip on my hips to take out his hair but I quickly slapped his hands while sinking deeper on his cock. "Leave them."

The same sensation of a cresting orgasm filled every inch of me, ecstasy shooting through my veins like a drug, and when Noah's thumb pressed fast circles against my clit, I leaned my head up towards the ceiling, lips parting as my hands wrapped around his braids, pulling with such force he choked on my name. I rode Noah faster, needing that last little bit of friction to tip me over the edge and when I finally let the bliss plow through me in droves, I held my breath.

"Angel," Noah cupped my cheek so I could look down at him. "Breathe through it with me."

I did as he said, both of us breathing out my orgasm as our eyes locked intently with each other. I writhed against him, my arousal soaking the condom and parts of his hips. It was such a simple action but the way it set my body on fire intensified the aftershocks to something I'd never experienced. Noah stared down to the place where we met and with a noisy moan, he wrapped an arm tighter around me to pull me flush against his chest as his hips stilled for a second before he emptied himself inside the condom.

NOAH

I pressed light kisses all along Y/N's shoulder blades, in shock and almost slight jealousy as I took in every inch of the large tattoo that covered her back. It was of a large snake that wrapped along every groove of her spine with an array of different Japanese flowers.

Afterward, I let her fall onto the mattress with a happy sigh, immediately grasping the pillow closer to her chest and that's when I noticed the tattoo.

"I can't believe I've never noticed this before," I mused while running a finger over the ink.

"It's taken like two years to complete. It's my second favorite after the one on my leg of the Gods," she rested her chin on her palm. "You know what I just realized? We have similar tattoo themes; copy cat."

Her finger grazed over the snake and apple along my neck.

"Yeah," I chuckled. "All you need is an apple right here."

I smacked right above her ass and she shrieked while falling into the pillow once again, a long but content sigh falling from her lips. I kissed from between her shoulder blades down her back, my nails grazing beyond the wake of my lips.

"Are you okay?" I wondered while gently squeezing her hips.

“Yeah, I think so. I feel content, just basking in it. You?”

I nodded and kissed the side of her head as I lay next to her. "I feel great."

"Do you know what you want in 10 years?" Y/N blurted out.

“That’s a random question” I chuckled while kissing her lips.

She sighed and looked up at me through her lashes. “I know but think about it, like really think about it?”

I thought deeply about her question, fingers still grazing her spine. “Alright I’ll bite, I don’t know, I’ve always been trying to make it with whatever bullshit has been going on in my fucking life- just wanting to mean something to somebody, make music- for anybody out there to listen. To be the fucking king you know?”

She laughs. "And?"

"Way down the road maybe one day in the future- to live in the middle of nowhere with a dog, cats, and a family of my own. In my wooden home that I built."

Y/N's body went rigid with my words.

"But right now, no dog, no family just…just Bad Omens," I finished with a hopeful breath.

She hummed in response but turned her head to face the wall opposite of us, something bothering her. Not wanting to push it, I left another kiss on her spine before I slipped out of bed to discard of the condom in the bathroom trash, a light red color catching my attention.

Once back in the room, I slipped back underneath the covers.

"Angel?"

Another hum vibrated from her throat, sleep weighing heavy on her shoulders.

"Did you get your period?"

I swore I saw all the breath leave her body with my question and my mind panicked, thinking she was embarrassed.

"It's fine," I rubbed her back soothingly. "I just saw some blood on the condom, that's all."

When she still said nothing, I nudged her face with my nose. "Are you alright?"

"Yep," she said quietly.

"Stay till morning?" I asked, hopefully.

Finally, she turned to face me and left a kiss on my nose. "I have to go."

My heart fell into the dark pits of my stomach as I watched her slip out from underneath the sheet to gather her clothes. "What's wrong?"

"It's nothing, Noah." She slipped back into her clothes rather quickly. "I just have an early flight to catch and I know you have one too."

I shook my head and stood to my feet while slipping my briefs and joggers back on. "I don't buy that. We were great, where did you go just now?"

She doesn't want to leave, I can see that in the way her movements slowed once she was dressed, almost as if she was buying time for me to say something that would change her mind. But she refused to meet my gaze.

"Angel, look at me. What's the matter?" I asked again.

"Nothing-," she began with a sigh.

"Then why won't you stay?"

The fear of her slipping between my fingers was debilitating.

"Noah, you know I can’t; we can’t," Y/N stumbled over her words.

I stretched my arms out wide at my sides. "Why? Why can’t you?"

With her gaze still cast down to her feet, she shook her head. "You don’t want me Noah, trust me, you don’t want any part of this."

"Bullshit," I spat as my anger got the best of me.

Y/N's head snapped up towards me, finally looking me in my eyes and all I saw in hers were the wetness of tears. "I have this condition that already makes my life harder every fucking month. I don't need to bring you into it and ruin our future, alright?"

My heart stopped for a few seconds. "Condition? What the fuck, are you dying or something? I don't know what the hell this means."

"No," she rushed out. "I'm not dying. I-I don't want to get into this right now. All I know is that I would need you a lot more than you'd need me. And you deserve better than me, anyway."

"Don't-" I started while pointing a finger at her.

She ran a distressed hand through her hair. "You know it’s true Noah, please. This is hard enough as it is. Walking out right now."

The bed stood between us and I hated feeling so far from her even though we were still in the same room so I walked around it, standing a few inches in front of her now.

"I’ve been through a lot of shit in my life too, Y/N. Don’t sit there and tell me what I can and can’t handle. Don’t sit there and tell me what I want or don’t want. You’re just so afraid of us," I pointed between us.

She grasped her elbows to hug herself and I could see the way her mind was running, gears turning hastily. Y/N was shutting down in front of me and I fucking hated it.

"Don’t fucking do that. I’m not him," I assured her with a gentler tone.

All of this was a trauma response, something so embedded deep into her brain that it was the only way she knew how to act. I know she felt the same way that I did; it was clear with what happened not even an hour ago. If she didn't feel the way I did, she wouldn't have shown up tonight. Y/N wants to stay, I can see it in the way her eyes keep darting to the bed but the pain and trauma were too deep.

"I’m sorry angel, I just- you’re wrong. I know how I feel about you, and I know what you feel about me."

I went to reach for her hands but she took a step back, a few tears falling to the ground below.

"I know what I feel. It’s not you, it’s me, Noah."

Not that fucking line.

"No. Fuck, angel! Stop! The future hasn't even happened yet. Please, don't-what do you need to happen?"

Her bottom lip trembled as a broken sob clawed its wait through her throat. "I-I think we need to remain friends right now. I can't-I can't get lost in you, Noah. It's so fucking easy to. I think we need space."

"I-I don't fucking want that, Y/N. I just want you."

"Noah, please understand where I'm coming from," she begged.

I paced the room, hands shaking in anger. Defeat? I wasn't sure.

"Angel-I. Please, just-," I eventually sighed in defeat.

"I'm going to head out."

Y/N nodded towards the door after gathering her things and stepped past me to leave.

The fear of losing her completely is what made me give in to her wishes. As much as I wanted to fight her choice, I needed her as a friend more than something more. I'll take what I can get for right now until she realizes she feels the same; I know she does.

As she opened the door, my feet closed the distance between us in two large steps and I grasped her chin, forcing her to look at me. The tears burned with the need to fall but she held fast and strong, refusing to show me how badly walking away was affecting her.

I brushed my lips across hers in a soft kiss. "I can wait for you."

She tried to disagree but my grip was too strong. "Noah- I can’t ask you to do that. That’s not fair. You deserve-"

“Don’t tell me what you think I deserve." I let out a shaky breath. "Look, heaven knows I’m not getting over you, I can wait”

“Besides. I’m known for having a lot of fuckin patience. I will wait." I finished with a shrug.

If I wasn't already staring intently at her, I almost would have missed the small nod she gave me; but I didn't. I saw it.

“Goodnight Noah.”

With one final kiss, not enough to remember the way she tastes, Y/N let the door shut behind her as I burned my hateful gaze through it. She left? How the fuck could she just leave after the night we had together?

No, fuck that.

I barreled through the door in time to notice she was only two doors down, frozen in her spot.

"Angel," I called after her.

Slowly, she turned, and I sucked in a breath when I saw the redness in her eyes, puffy with teh tears she let out as soon as the door closed. Mine mirrored hers.

"Please," I begged. "Just come back to me. I'll wait for you."

Y/N hesitated but within that hesitation, something stood out clear as day; she took a small step towards me until that doubt filled the back of her mind yet again. I stayed in the hallway watching as she turned the corner, disappearing from my vision and life; my words not being enough to make her stay.

Back inside the room, I let the door slam shut and made a beeline toward the minibar. I screwed off the cap of the Hennessy, downing half of it in one go.

"Bitter ends to the night. I'm along for the ride," I raised the bottle in the air before taking another long, slow gulp with my eyes screwed shut.

Suddenly, they snapped open, and I rummaged around the mess of my room for my phone, quickly typing out a text to Jolly.

I need to write a song, now.

Only a few minutes passed before he responded, just enough time for me to pop open another bottle.

Now? It's three in the morning and we have nothing here.

Doesn't fucking matter. I'll figure it out. Come to my room.

Letting the bottle slip from my fingers, I stalked over to the wall and slid down until my ass hit the floor with a thud; the image of Y/N crying and walking away burned into my brain. I was out of breath, out of time trying to stop her but, in the end, everything has a price. And I was paying for it.

#noah sebastian #noah sebastian and reader #noah sebastian x reader #noah sebastian reader insert #noah sebastian smut #enemies to lovers #right person wrong time #starcrossed lovers

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weirdmarioenemies · 2 months

Text

Name: Destiny Del Vecchio

Debut: High School

G-g-g-gulp!! Prom night at Wet-Dry High is TOMORROW, and I still don't have a date! I wish I could ask Destiny Del Vecchio, the most popular girl in school, but there's no way she'd ever go out with a nerd like me!!

Thank god I have you, Spikey, my best friend from chess club! Nerds like us ought to stick together, I say!

What's that? You say you know a way to infiltrate Destiny Del Vecchio's social circle? No way! I think you're nuts! But well, it wouldn't hurt to try, I guess...

(Later that day...)

Excuse me, are you the guy they call... "the informant"...? The one who knows all about everyone in school?

"Heh, depends who's asking!"

Um, I'm a friend of Spikey's? I need your help! How can I get Destiny Del Vecchio to like me so I can take her to prom?

"Heh, I usually charge 30 bucks for a juicy piece of info like that, but a friend of Spikey's is a friend of mine! The key to Destiny Del Vecchio's heart is easy- everyone knows she can't resist a bad boy!"

I see! Thank you so much! I really owe you one!

"Heh, don't mention it! By the way, would you like to check out my YouTube channel? I do some pretty sweet prank videos!"

Erm, I think I'll pass. But thank you anyway!

Phew! I did it! Now that I've totally reinvented my image as a bad boy, Destiny Del Vecchio is totally gonna want to go to prom with me for sure!

Look, there's Destiny Del Vecchio right now, with her friends! Excuse me ladies, may I have a moment?

Hey Destiny Del Vecchio, baby! I'm a total bad boy now, so whaddaya say you and I go to prom together, baby?

"I'm sorry, but I have to decline. It offends me that you think I'm shallow enough to only judge people based on appearance. I'm sure we could have gotten along if you hadn't distanced yourself from others due to your perceived social status, but it's too late now. Relationships take time to blossom."

"Besides, I've already agreed to go to prom with the hottest guy in school, Teen Mario! He's so cute! Squeeeeeee!"

Aw, shucks! Looks like someone beat me to the punch, so I've learned no lessons from this situation whatsoever. Hey, there's always next year, right? Right? I don't actually know if prom is every year. Am I right?

What's that? You say YOU still want to go to prom with me...?

(The next day...)

Gee willikers! I've finally learnt the True Meaning of Prom, and it was friendship all along! I couldn't have realized this without you, Spikey! Looks like this story had a happy ending after all! Now, LET'S BOOGIE!!!

youtube

#destiny del vecchio #high school #april fools #mod f boy

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firehose118 · 2 months

Text

Okay even after writing this I’m still thinking about the importance of Tommy calling Buck Evan.

Names are identities. Names can be armor or they can be intimate (if you want a deeper exploration of this in fiction, please watch Black Sails). A chosen identity can be especially important as a way to control how you are viewed by others.

He goes by Buck because that’s what they called him in the academy. “Buck” is a firefighter, and as we know being a firefighter is his whole reason for living (as evidenced by the cursed lawsuit arc). He could have gone back to “Evan” when he joined the 118, but he introduced himself as “Buck” very intentionally. It was a reinvention, a shedding of his past.

Evan is a name that he associates with his parents, and his parents are so much of the reason why it took him so long to understand who he is fundamentally. Evan is who he was as a child. Evan is his parents’ unwanted son, the name they’d say like a curse whenever he did something stupid to get their attention. He hates being called Evan because his parents yelled it at him so many times that the very sound of it feels like a scold.

As others have pointed out, he probably got flustered and introduced himself to Tommy as Evan Buckley before correcting himself and saying Buck. But Tommy latched on to that and kept calling him Evan. It doesn’t seem like Buck corrected him. He doesn’t mind the name in Tommy’s mouth.

Tommy isn’t talking to Buck-the-firefighter. He’s talking to Evan-the-man. When Tommy says “Evan” he’s saying, “I see the you that is underneath the person you project out into the world. I see the you that you really are and I will call you by your name.”

There’s something deeply intimate there. Buck was a womanizer (which, he wasn’t, but that’s another post). Evan is queer. Tommy sees the Evan that Buck has been suppressing for so long—the one he didn’t even know was there—and he brings that person to the surface. He speaks to the heart of him directly.

Think about how few times people call him “Evan” throughout the series. Maddie uses that name when she hasn’t even spoken to him in three years. Evan is her little brother. She starts calling him Buck when she gets to know him as a man, not a little boy. She respects that he is a different person now than he was when she last saw him. She understands the difference.

Eddie calls him Evan exactly once, as far as I can remember, and that was very intentional on his part. When he sat on that hospital bed and said “Because, Evan,” Eddie needed him to listen, needed him to understand how important what he was saying is. Eddie understands the power of calling him Evan, understands he needs to address a fundamentally different part of this man to get him to understand how important he is to Eddie. To Chris. At all.

One thing I haven’t personally seen discussed is the sort of meta reason why his character is called Buck: his defining characteristics in the first season are how young and inexperienced and reckless he is. He’s a young buck. I genuinely believe the writers came up with that and then decided to give him the last name Buckley as an excuse to call him that.

So for Tommy to call him Evan, and for him to accept that as an identity without cringing, is him growing up. Excuse the phrase, but it’s him healing his inner child. To hear “Evan” said casually, reverently, lovingly is a revelation. It is a connection between the lonely child and the actualized adult. It is the man in his totality.

#this is a little disorganized but I am GRIPPED by this #tevan nation rise up #911 #911 abc #bucktommy #911 meta #mine

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shanastoryteller · 9 months

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hallo! i hope your day is going well!! what’s one of your favorite details that you’ve written about siat recently? or if not that, in another fic or snippet

in ta'burni, after tony's parents die when he's 17 at MIT, we get this from rhodey's pov (bold for emphasis)

“They’ll eat you alive,” Tony says, reminding him a lot of his mother just then. Rhodey watches Tony get in a limo surrounded by cameras, his black jeans his own and mostly that color because of one too many motor oil stains and the black button down too long and too big in the shoulders because it’s Rhodey’s, a streak of black against the blinding white of a thousand camera flashes.

later in the fic pepper meets tony when he's 30 and she's 25 and showing him around a gallery auction, she compares him to barton newmans's now ii

this is what she says about it:

“Barnett Newman completed this three years before his death and it’s a wonderful piece,” she says, head held high. “He said he wanted to paint as if inventing painting from scratch, as if no one had ever done it before.”

“It’s just a line,” he repeats, still amused. “That’s what he thought needed to be reinvented?”

She doubts she’ll ever be standing in front of Tony Stark again so she has to get this right, has to say this in a way that hopefully won’t offend him, because the other option is to say something she doesn’t mean and that’s a waste for both of them. “It’s a perfect line. Perfectly straight, perfectly black, and surrounded by perfect white. Not in color, it’s not the blackest black or the whitest white, but the tone matches perfectly. Their perfection is only obvious in their togetherness.” She could stop here, she could not embarrass herself in front of the most powerful businessman in the world, but she has achieved nothing in her life by being a coward. “The first time you drew a line, it wasn’t perfect. It probably wasn’t even straight. But you drew it again, and again, until it was, and now the lines you draw are turned into designs and schematics that change the world, from weapons you send overseas to the processor in my computer. You design as if you are inventing the world from scratch, which is why you’re doing things that others claim can’t be done, which is why you’re doing it better the rest of them.”

He's not smiling anymore, but he doesn’t look angry, or bored, or anything that will get her fired.

She swallows and continues, “Barnett Newman said of his paintings that he hoped that they had the impact of giving someone the feeling of their own totality, their own separateness, their own individuality, as that’s what they did for him. This line is you and everything that you will do. You make it look easy, Mr. Stark, but that doesn’t mean it is.”

in iron man 2, the print that he takes down and replaces with a color pop portrait of iron man is now ii

i figured the chance of anyone noticing was pretty much 0, especially when part of it is in the movie and not the fic

but for me it was tony's life

before. becoming. became

#asks #anon #thank you for asking this #ta'burni

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prickly-paprikash · 2 months

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Not me rewatching Blue Eye Samurai for the nth time and only realizing now how Mizu's use of weights, shifting it into the parts to extend the katana into a naginata is also just another expression of Mizu's inherent fluidity. And I could be extremely wrong since I've only just learned, but the naginata, like most polearms, was the weapon of war, and was usually seen as a woman's weapon.

The Katana, seen as the weapon for honorable duels of which only men typically used due to their sense of honor and patriarchal beliefs going hand-in-hand, is what Mizu uses most of the time. We learn that while she is a naturally gifted warrior, she only picked up proper use of the naginata when she was a wife. It's just so cool, seeing that Mizu reserves the use of the sword for executing their prey or dueling with foes (like Taigen) because that is how a true 'man' would do it. But when push comes to shove and Mizu's outnumbered and outmanned, the polearm is the smarter and more practical choice.

A testament once again to how Mizu's greatest strength is her fluidity. Gender Expression. Combat Style. Wit. Sheer bloody will to survive. And why Mizu, during the latter half of the season, has to step back and reinvent themself was because she'd become rigid. Uncompromising. Like a blade that needs to be melted down and reforged. Like a clogged river, stagnant and prone to collecting scum.

With Mizu gallivanting off to London, this will most likely reveal another facet to her that she refuses to accept. Mizu isn't just rigid in the first season; they're incomplete. Hating the white part of herself—hiding the feminine aspect of themself. Whatever Mizu learns in London will most likely begin her journey into seeing herself as a whole.

She's not a soldier, meant to be stiff and rigid. She's an artist, and an artist needs flexibility to grow and thrive.

#blue eye samurai #mizu is gender #mizu #mizu blue eye samurai #mizu brainrot #paprikash ramblings

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casasupernovas · 8 months

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thing is.

the doctor in series 3 is a lot more complex people give him credit for.

when he gets mad at martha at the end of 'smith and jones' it's not because he's offended at her flirting, annoyed at her insinuations, 'how dare she'. no. he's mad because she sussed him out, right down to the blue suit.

in 'smith and jones' the doctor has a clean slate, he has reinvented himself. and this version has no baggage.

this doctor hasn't got a brown suit it's blue, this doctor is flirtaious, romantic, even does the 'honourable' thing of making sure she knows the kiss he will give her means nothing. she won't get attatched that way when he sacrifices himself to draw out the plasmavore.

but this doctor is also a bit callous, he's excited by the thrill and danger, dimissing very real distress from people around him in favour for the facts. he only pulls himself back upon his conversation with martha.

in fact, it's no coincidence the kiss happens after martha commemorates the dead, her old mentor.

the problem is however, martha is too clever, too observant, too confident to completely be won over by this entirely. when he tells her he is the doctor, just the doctor, at first she refuses to call him by this. he has to earn it. sonic screwdriver? lol, got an electric spanner too? she asks if he has help because surely he didn't come to this hospital because he thought something was wrong on his own?

that's why he says stuff like this. he's like why are you poking holes in the illusion. i'm *this* person now, don't take me back to my reality.

but he's not quite done. they both could have died on the moon but she saves his life so, he gets another chance. incomes the reinvented doctor part two. [you can argue the doctor always knew they would make it because martha told him she saw him in a moment that had happened for her but not yet for him.]

so part 2 commences but he's turning it all the way up because he wants her as his companion.

so he's smooth talking her, but even then she's still not letting him get one over on her. "not pompous at all." so better turn it up some more, and he time travels, a 'cheap trick' to impress her more.

until his newly formed version of himself gets a hole poked in once again after martha inadvertantly makes him remember rose. and he clams up, decides it will only be one trip in a pretty aloof, defensive and abrupt way. shuts down any path that could lead to something more, testing to see if she can do the same - "i only go for humans" - she can and away we go. he's racing about the tardis back to semi-normal and they are off.

it's why he's so having mood swings all throughout 'the shakespeare code,' flip flopping between annoyance and dismissal at her questions, she's ruining how it was supposed to go in his head. she wasn't supposed to ask *this* many questions, she was just supposed to be impressed. but she went and reminded me of rose so this can't work now, it's gonna be one trip. but then flipping back to this need to impress and to just fall back into step to how they were, running around and having an adventure. how he's supposed to be.

and he decides i don't want this to end. im extending the trip. but yet again martha pokes another hole - his home. but the doctor holds onto the pretense for as long as he can. he doesn't just say "we can't go to my home and please don't ask me why because it's painful." he just lies. and this pretense now takes on a new form, because it directly references rose with choosing new earth. see, he starts by reminiscing on gallifrey when he describes it to her then chooses someone else to reminisce on. rose. all with little regard to how martha would feel about being used in this way. but unfortunately for the doctor, this takes a dramatic change for the worse as taking martha here directly leads to her abduction.

now, despite martha's olive branch after the death of the face of boe, the doctor still doesn't tell her the truth. until she sits down, and really hones in on his lies and the people of new new york began to sing for the dead. and the doctor looks at martha, the human, listening to the humans commeorate the dead. and tells her the truth. that he lied because he liked it. because he could pretend. pretend that his reality was not true. he was not the last timelord.

intriguingly enough, by the time we get to the lazarus experiment, the doctor seems determined to play out how the story was supposed to go. yet again disregarding martha's feelings. find a new companion. travel for a bit, then bring her home safe and sound. and not one year later. no ties, a nice thanks then goodbye. no heartbreak, no tears. but he comes back. because he doesn't want it to end yet, offers her another trip. and here goes martha again. telling him he needs to be clear in what he wants right now. he's not someone who can just breeze in and out of her life without a second thought. is she his companion or is she a passenger?

and the pretense is over. mostly anyway, and the doctor is at his mlst vulnerable due to the circumstances of '42' and by its end, it's like a refreshed smith and jones.

but now he doesn't feel the need to lie, he's not fully there yet. but he's more comfortable, he doesn't need to pretend.

perhaps too comfortable.

#doctor who #martha jones #tenth doctor #10th doctor #tenmartha #smith and jones #the shakespeare code #meta #the lazarus experiment #42 #human nature #the family of blood #blink #utopia #the sound of drums #last of the timelords

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galebrainrot2024 · 3 months

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Gale x Tav Enemies to Lovers Part 19

Read on Ao3

Full transparency, I did pull some loose lines from a NSFW of mine. No reason for me to totally reinvent the wheel! Enjoy :) Gale's POV

After the rest of their companions retired, Karlach tentatively walked over to Gale and stuck her head in his room, “Pst,” she waved a hand. “Up for a little late night walk about?”

Despite his exhaustion and because the orb didn’t loom over him, he obliged and stood, groaning as he rose to his feet. “Gladly.”

They walked the outskirts of the inn, trailing along the black water’s edge in silence before Karlach broke the silence. “So…” she said, rubbing the back of her neck, “How are you feeling? I mean, now that you’re not the only one facing the possibility of death.”

Gale released a quick, short puff of air. “Oh, you know, ever the optimist.” He paused, sitting on the flat rocks overlooking the murky abyss. “I wouldn’t wish this fate on anyone, least of all you. It would be selfish to talk about myself when you’ve only learned of your fate.”

Karlach laughed and shoved his shoulder, “Come off it, mate. I’ve been living on borrowed time and we both knew it, the difference is now it’s been confirmed. It’s not speculation anymore. This engine is going to blow and I’ll be damned if I step foot back in the hells. Besides,” she said, tossing a stick into the lake, “what have I got to offer this world? You were a chosen, an archmage… you have so much to live for and your death is not inevitable.” She looked at him seriously, “You have to reconsider.”

“I’m just a man,” Gale frowned, running a hand over his weary face, “An imperfect one, with needs, wants, and flaws by the bushel. A fragile vessel in which to place potentially world-ending power.”

Karlach groaned and stood to pace. “I hate it when you talk about yourself like that. Mystra must have done quite the number on you, for you to think so little of yourself.”

Gale fiddled with his collar and sleeves, uncomfortable and unaccustomed to such blatant vulnerability. “Well, it’s hard to think highly of yourself once you’ve been reduced to a pitiful excuse to the person you once were. And even more so now that my ex-lover, and goddness of magic, has more or less signed my fate. My end.”

“You have so much to live for,” Karlach expressed, waving her arms. “What about your friends? Tara? Your mother? Tav?” Gale ignored her when she emphasized Tav’s name and he swallowed hard. “Fine, ignore whatever is going on between Tav and you. What about the rest? If I were in your shoes, there’s no way I’d be willing to kill myself for a God like her.”

Gale felt his temperature rise and clenched his fists, “It’s not that simple.”

“Isn’t it?” She walked back and forth, emphasizing her point with broad strokes, “First, she casts you out with no explanation - I mean, yeah, you meddled in a Goddesses affairs, and she could have at least told you what you’d done. Has she ever told you, the source of the orb’s power I mean?” Gale shook his head and bit the insides of his cheek. “Exactly. So, we don’t even know what this thing is and she, an omnipotent being, couldn’t be bothered to offer you the grace of an explanation? You’re not the first human to make such an error, I’d reckon.”

Gale laughed and shrugged, “Perhaps you’re right. Perhaps I ought to be angrier… ah… ultimately, it was my fault, my choice - my folly. I thought I knew better than a Goddess… I sought to return one, infinitesimal diamond to her crown. The equivalent of pouring a canteen of water into the Chionthar.” He scoffed, shaking his head, “Sacrificing myself for the rest of the realm feels like adequate punishment.”

Karlach groaned again, “I won’t sit here and listen to you kick yourself while you’re down, mate. It’s too damn depressing. You made a mistake - a foolish one - and a mistake all the same. If Mystra can’t think of another way to extend her forgiveness other than for you to take your own life, she’s not Goddess worth worshipping. We will find another way.”

“Maybe you should take your own advice,” Gale volleyed back to her. She smirked and threw a fistful of grass at him.

“Hey!” He brushed the leaves from his person, the tension leaving him. She certainly knew how to change his mood. “I don’t appreciate being decorated in this shadowed muck, thank you. Shouldn’t I be the one asking you how you’re feeling anyway? How did this become about me?”

She bellowed, raising her hands to the sky like a penitent. “This is the best day. The best day.”

Gale balked, his eyes widening. “Karlach. You were just given a death sentence. The best day?” He rose a brow at her, skeptical.

“You should know better than most how lonely it’s been to not be able to relish in anyone’s company. For years I’ve been starved of the simple pleasures of being alive. I’m so happy for me - in fact, I might be the happiest woman on the sword cost since I may have someone to cuddle up to tomorrow night…” Gale grinned to match her curled smirk. “I didn’t expect to see him here. He was giving me the old eye, right? I’m not making that up?”

Gale stood and gave her shoulder a gentle squeeze, “He was most definitely giving you the old eye. I’m happy for you, Karlach. Really I am. I.. I would be remiss if I didn’t tell you how worried I am, though. Dammon’s right - the world is better with you in it.”

“Listen,” she clasped his shoulders, looking at him seriously, “I’m never going back. If you said I could die right now or live a thousand years in the Hells, I’d choose to go out now with my freedom intact. I don’t expect anyone to understand that - but I’ve been dealt a hand most people don’t have to contemplate playing. You have, too - you should know better than anyone.”

“It doesn’t have to be forever,” he insisted, “it could give some time to find a proper solution. I have a hard time believing it can’t be managed.”

“You heard Dammon. There is no solution. It’s hell, or bust. I choose bust.” She shook her head and sighed, stepping away from him to look out at the endless blanketed sky. Her voice quavered, “I don’t want to talk about this now. I’ve been given a huge gift. I can touch people I love for the first time in a decade. And for the first time in a decade there are people I care about all around me. Let me enjoy that, please. I just want to celebrate this. At least for a little.” Gale understood the sentiment deeply and allowed the quiet night to consume them.

***

“Answer me true,” Jaheira said, placing her hands on the table. “Do not lie. The parasite is changing you, isn’t it?”

Gale stood behind Tav, observing carefully as she navigated the conversation. He was intrigued by her couth and furtiveness, how she leveraged her tone, her word choice, all while holding her cards tightly to her chest. As the days passed, Gale began to recognize how much he admired this in Tav. How they’d been faced with countless dangers, incredible odds, and she rarely faltered in her conviction. It was inspiring and arousing. He was enamored with how diplomatic she was, how tactful, just how cunning… and her talent with magic… it was enough to make him feel unhinged.

“Well,” Tav said, tracing her finger over the rim of the glass she refused. “I’ve experienced so much since the crash. Who’s to say it’s the tadpole that changed me?”

Jaheira sneered and Shadowheart giggled, earning her an elbow jab from Karlach who was listening intently. “You speak frivolously. Do you not grasp the cost of what we’re dealing with? Look around you… good people, stranded here two feet in the grave. If we’re to survive I have no choice but to trust you. Can I?”

“Trust doesn’t matter -“ Tav said cooly and Gale felt his stomach knot, her confidence was electric. “I’ll get the job done. What happened to being the godsend you’d been praying for?” He felt his lips curl into a crooked grin, and ran his fingers through his hair as he watched her, two snakes in an elaborate dance.

“That was a public display of hope, despite private reservations. I have every reason to be cautious. I’ve traced people like you - people with parasites in their brains. The cult is spreading through the city. Quietly. Quickly. With unsettling deliberation. We tracked them to this ancient village, only to be faced with a man we killed and buried over a century ago. General Kethric Thorm. Remember that name.”

After speaking with Jaheira, the group made a b-line towards the stair to seek out Isobel’s protection - if they were to venture to Moonrise, they’d need much more than crude torches. Gale was seized with the gravity of it all - how much larger than them this was. Larger than just the tadpoles. It was bleak, and he felt a sinking dread that detonating the orb would be the way.

He felt a lithe hand on his shoulder and turned his head as they lingered outside of Isobel’s room. “There will be another way,” Tav murmured and gave his upper arm a reassuring squeeze. He felt sick, overwhelmed by her touch, overwhelmed by the possibilities before him. Gale sought to ignore the creeping thoughts, the unholy things he wanted to do to her each time she touched him.

There was no ale, no potion, no feeling on earth that quite compared to when he looked into her eyes or when she touched him.

Her gaze lingered and Gale felt exposed, naked almost as she peered into his soul, as if she was probing the deepest recesses of his mind. As if she could hear his thoughts.

“How can you be so sure…” he whispered, averting her eyes. He was shocked when he felt her fingers brush his jaw, her gentle grip turning his face to meet hers.

“Because I know you, and I know myself. Neither of us do particularly well when we are told what we cannot do.” They held one another’s gaze for what felt like a millennia before Shadowheart cleared her throat.

“As much as I hate to interrupt this precious moment, we have a cult to ambush, remember?”

They blushed and separated like oil and water. “Right,” Tav said in a strained whisper and they swung open the doors.

“I didn’t realize I had an audience -“ Isobel said, her white hair iridescent in the shadow's light. “The true soul who’s going to save us all. Pleased to meet you.”

“Word travels fast.” Tav said, crossing her arms.

“Hm… it’s a small inn. It’s almost too good to believe. Free from the Absolute’s influence, yet able to walk among cultists... yet, a blessing all the same. Let me guess, Jaheira sent you to beg a protection spell of her favorite cleric.”

As Isobel manipulated the blue light that projected from her palm, Gale cocked a brow at Shadowheart’s scoff. Bold, to openly denounce someone who was offering their guidance and help. Selunite cleric or not, he’d thought her more clever than that. Old wounds die hard, he supposed.

“This should help get you closer to the towers… but there are places it won’t help, where the curse is too strong, darker. The cultists are able to traverse the deepest shadows - the harpers are trying to figure it out.”

“Selunite magic.” Shadowheart scoffed and shook her head, as if to rid herself of the spell. “Dark Lady forgive me.”

“Good nose - like a nasty little terrier.” Isobel quipped, a clip that would have earned a nasty retort from Shadowheart had there not been a strange, threatening noise that engulfed them.

Gale felt a rumbling, as if the ground itself threatened to split open. He reached out, grabbing hold of Tav’s arm. “Something is wrong.”

As Karlach wiped Marcus’s blood from her axe, Gale wiped his face with a cloth. Shadowheart brushed off her armor and rolled her shoulder’s back. “Well. There’s always something, isn’t there.”

“The plot thickens,” Karlach said, taking a gulp of water. “What I’d give for some precedented, run of the mill ass-whopping. This all feels… I don’t know. Too heavy.” Gale’s brow furrowed - it wasn’t often she admitted to feeling overwhelmed.

“This is the same Karlach that fought in the Blood War?” Gale taunted, to which she stuck out her tongue in mock defiance and tossed the bloodied, balled-up cloth at him.

Gale dodged the throw, holding out his arms as if to say 'See that? This Wizard still has some tricks up his sleeve.' Then, he looked steadily at Tav and his face contorted for a moment - was that a flash of jealousy? He licked his lips, trying to add moisture to his desperately parched mouth. Tav’s knuckles were white as they gripped her canteen.

Gale extended a hand to her, “Care to share?”

He admired how her skin flushed, the beads of sweat pooling on her forehead and snaked in miniature rivulets down her cheeks. When she handed him the canteen, her fingers brushed against his knowingly and he felt electrified. Before he could reconcile with himself, the words spilled out of him like a bad batch of Hundur sauce.

“You know… it’s quite thrilling, to fight off such grim creatures as this region throws at us. Especially being at your side,” he paused for a moment, embarrassed yet unable to stop, “I once… read a book that explained in some detail the effect a brush with danger has on one’s desire for… other forms of stimulation.” He swallowed some water, though it did little to alleviate the desert inside, “Have you ever read anything on that subject?”

He was acutely conscious of the gleeful shock on Shadowheart and Karlach’s faces. He bit down on the inside of his lip and swayed a bit on his feet before relief consumed him as Tav spoke: “Read it?” she said softly, but with a knowing glint in her eyes that made Gale’s heart flutter, “I could have written the damn thing...” he saw her swallow hard, the hallow of her neck calling out to him like a siren song. What he would give to flick his tongue along the vulnerable skin.

Gale cleared his throat, shifting to conceal his growing arousal. Thank the gods he was wearing a loose robe.”Oh…” he took a deep breath, a lopsided grin betraying his wanton need, “Then might I suggest we pool our knowledge. No sense in letting valuable, first hand experience go to waste.” He tried to steady himself as his mind whirled with salacious details, the lustful heat seeping through his body and soul. He wanted more than her physical body. He wanted all of her - her mind, her soul. To bond with her in a tantric, unworldly experience. “Perhaps it’s just the thrill of our near-undead experience talking, but standing at your side through such darkness and disrepair...my Gods..” Gale’s face softened, his voice cool. He couldn’t quite manage the rest once he realized he saw the same hunger, the ache in her soul.

The words lodged in his throat, unable to be uttered and so they lingered invisibly in the air: it only makes me want you more.

He wasn't able to spare himself further embarrassment. “Gale - did you just,” Shadowheart broke the silence, “I’m sorry, did you just tell Tav you wanted to have sex with her by citing a book?” Shadowheart giggled, though not out of malice. "After we just murdered a teeming host of winged horrors and a mangled, freaky-cultist? I didn't think you had it in you, to be honest."

The way Karlach began to crack up made his ears burn. The air seemed to crackle, alive and whipping with the impending storm of two bodies desperate to intertwine. Gale and Tav were side by side, he staring down into her enrapturing eyes and allowed himself to indulge in every inch of her face, her body…

Karlach started: “So, Tav, are you going to let the wizard ba-“

But before she could finish her sentiment, Jaheira bounded up the stairs, accosting them and Isobel. The conversation would have to wait.

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hotluncheddie · 1 year

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stop being a goblin and let me kiss you

part 3

˚✧₊⁎ ⁎⁺˳✧༚ ⁎⁺˳✧༚

‘ok. ok! you just, you just gotta be cool munson. be casual. chill. just like, vibe, yeah? yeah. no more funny business.’ eddie holds his fists up to himself in the dinky bathroom mirror. a couple of jabs, a quick one two, that’ll clear his head.

clear his head enough to go out and deal with steve fucking harrington again and his stupid stupid face and neck and tongue and like pretty fucking ankle bones. fucker.

see eddies not blind, and he’s not that dumb, he knows he flirts with steve and he knows steve flirts back. he just. cant deal with it just yet. it’s like every time he’s around the guy he blacks out and resurfaces red faced and half hard. but the point at which his vision fades and all hell breaking loose seems to vary so completely that he can’t stop it happening.

their conversations will start normal, a jolly lark, a guffaw here, a story there but then bam! someone said or did something that shifted his functioning brain capacity from 60% on a good day to like -5% and that’s being generous.

he just can’t get his ratty little self to either 1) stop liking steve harrington in a gay, gay, homosexual way. or 2) accept that someone like steve harrington could possibly like aforementioned rat himself eddie munson and actually process his feeling into a reaction that’s more than; red, red, half a boner, sweaty palms, red.

so he took a second to hide in the bathroom. that’s fine, that’s kind even. self care, as robin likes to say when she paints her nails on top of steve’s head when he sits on the computer at work. he likes to make the chair super low because apparently it helps his posture and he need to keep an eye on his posture or else he’ll end up like his great uncle melvin, or something.

self care time is over however because robins knocking on the little bathroom door, hollering about needing to get home to practice for her english presentation tomorrow. so it’s time for eddie to put his big boy pants back on and get in steve’s car.

eddie full body shudders.

‘finish writing you sad boy poems on the stall walls in there? roses are red, violets are blue, i like big dumb jock boys but can’t seem to accept they like me too, even if my very cool very in the know friend robin tells me too. hm?’ robin slings an arm over his shoulder and steers him back to the table.

eddie sniffs, crossing his arms ‘that last bit doesn’t rhyme so, i will be ignoring all of it. F for u buckbey.’

‘not everything has to rhyme perfectly u know. it can still fit together just fine as it is.’ she tugs on one of his curls before slipping back into steve side, finishing off the last of his milkshake and hauling him out of the booth because she ‘has shit to do dingus.’

too smart for her own good that chick. eddie loves her. he’s also going to move away and never talk to her ever again, maybe steal her collection of berets too, become a hat guy, once he reinvents himself. yeah.

steve is putting a few bills on the table, slinging his jacket over his shoulder. ‘just fries tonight ed’s? that makes you kind of a cheap date don’t you think?’ tapping eddie under the chin before following robin to the door, smacking his palm on the frame above on the way out. because of course he does, the neanderthal. all broad shoulders and biceps and ass.

there a second where eddie thinks steve could smack him like that but then he feels his vision spotting. can a guy not catch a break around here? jesus!

the car ride is a blissful reprieve due to cyndi lauper coming on, which had steve and robin performing a duet. which then needed to be tweaked and discussed in detail ready for the next time that specific song came on the radio.

it was honestly nice to watch. eddie had walked to family video that day because his van keeps playing up after it’s stint hidden in the woods. poor girl just needs a day off once in a while so eddie walks and then listens to car duets from two very much none singers. but it nice. makes his heart all yucky and warm.

until robin is leaving. leaving him alone to be a big nerd with a future. leaving him alone to make a fool of himself again. his ego is big and he likes to keep it that way.

‘you coming up here then’ steve shifts slightly, looking as far as he can over his shoulder at eddie huddled behind the drivers seat. ‘no’ he squeaks because last time steve got all up in his face getting his tape box out of the glove compartment. rifling through it while it was on eddies lap. so close eddie could smell the apple from his shampoo and the cigarette they’d shared earlier.

self care.

‘ooh you want the full harington taxi service do you? i see, well then govna, where too is it?’ steve tips his invisible cap and has the most awful cockney accent eddies ever heard, and he did middle school theatre.

‘geeze, just take me home dude.’ eddie shoves through the gap between the seats, landing heavy in the passenger. crossing his arms and trying to hide his smile behind his hair.

‘there he is. out of the shadows.’ steve tucks some of his curls behind his ear. eddie sees the soft smile out of his peripheral. tries to swallow the cotton in his mouth. steve turn back to the road ‘let’s rock ‘n roll’ he revvs the engine, wiggling his eyebrows, before checking his blind spot and pulling away into a cushy 30mph.

eddie looks out the window and hides his grin in his palm.

˚✧₊⁎ ⁎⁺˳✧༚ ⁎⁺˳✧༚

part 1 (eddie) part 2 (steve) part 4 (steve) part 5 (eddie) part 6 (steve) part 7 (eddie)

tags! ( ty for asking to be tagged wow so lovely can’t believe it hehe :3c ) (sry if i missed anyone or u didn’t want to be tagged just let me know!)

@bidisastersworld @sadcanadianwinter @mightbeasleep @butterflysandpeppermint @gregre369 @fandomz-brainrot @satan-is-obsessed @resident-gay-bitch @grtwdsmwhr @forsexyscience

#steddie #steve x eddie #my silly silly boys #cocky steve #eddie and robin are besties it’s tru its tru #<3 #hotlunch #my fic #stop being a goblin and let me kiss you

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ctitan98official · 3 months

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Sex worker Alcina x Y/N

18+ Minors DNI

Alright, so I had an idea after watching Pretty Woman (Although, it’s really nothing like the movie except for Alcina being a sex worker) This is dark and pretty angsty. It will get lighter as the story progresses, but I wanted you to be aware. This part is more like a set up to Y/N and Alcina meeting. I hope you like it! Let’s get into it!

Alcina leaned against the wall of the dimly lit alley, her voluptuous figure outlined by the flickering streetlights. She took a lazy drag from her cigarette and frowned. Time for work again…

From the time Alcina became an adult, it seemed that people always made harsh judgements about her. She’s aware of the rumors and reputation her name carries. She’s heard all of the same tired insults before.

She’s promiscuous.

She’s fickle.

She’s selfish.

… She searches for affection from strangers because she never got it as a child.

Well… She tends to agree with that last statement, at least.

Alcina descends from aristocracy. House Dimitrescu, to be precise. She actually held the title of Countess for a while back in Romania. Her parents expected her to follow in their footsteps and promote the family’s legacy, but she never wanted all of that.

Alcina couldn’t take sitting through stuffy dinners and entertaining guests like some kind of novelty act. She knew her parents were just going to set her up with some pompous heir and want her to start a family. To be the perfect, doting wife. However, once Alcina set out on her own, at the age of 19, she was determined to reinvent herself into the type of woman she wanted to be. Not what others expected.

Coming from a privileged background with overbearing, helicopter parents, she had to learn how to take care of herself quickly. Suddenly being thrust into the real world was a culture shock, but she adapted and did what she had to do.

She started out as a server at a small diner. Just something to pay the bills. However… She always dreamed of being a singer and she did the work to make connections. She went to clubs and bars, mingling with musicians and building friendships. Her charisma attracted others easily and it didn’t take long before she was invited join a few bands.

Things were great for a while. Gigs were plentiful and she even had to quit her job at the diner because she was so in demand. But… Eventually work started drying up. She was getting older and the fresh-faced young adult she used to be was now gone. Her voice was tired, shot. She couldn’t perform at the level she needed to anymore. She became desperate.

She took odd jobs anywhere she could. She even started dancing for a few nightclubs. People were entranced by the rhythmic movements of her hips and body. Much like with her singing, she became a highly sought after entertainer. It seemed she had pivoted and was once again back in command of her life. And… That’s when she met someone who would change her life for the better. Miranda…

One night after a show, Alcina was approached by an immaculately dressed blonde. The women hit it off and began talking happily. Miranda showered her in compliments and Alcina clung to her every word. She had finally gained someone’s approval. Someone who praised her. Someone who didn’t judge her. It felt… Good. Miranda proposed a partnership. She managed a lot of dancers in the area and wanted to take Alcina on as a client. Alcina said yes. She was addicted to the attention she received from Miranda. She wanted to impress her.

Miranda got Alcina booked for shows left and right, she bought her gorgeous outfits to wear on stage, and she even began paying the rent on Alcina’s apartment so she could focus on honing her craft. Alcina was happy. Fulfilled. She looked to Miranda like a mother figure and Miranda considered Alcina her daughter. The two had found family in each other and made a good team.

A few months into this arrangement, Miranda decided to… Branch off into new ventures with Alcina. Unfortunately, the clubs took a hefty share of all of Alcina’s profits and it pissed Miranda off to no end. She wanted the younger woman to be paid what she was worth. People wanted to objectify Alcina? Fine. But they were going to have to pay a hefty price first. So… She got an idea.

One night, when Alcina went back to her dressing room after a set, she saw that Miranda was already there… With company. Miranda offered a reassuring smile and introduced Alcina to the people in the room. It… Didn’t take long for Alcina to realize what Miranda wanted her to do with them. She took Miranda aside and questioned her, but the blonde placed a gentle hand on her arm and beamed. “This will be a great opportunity for you, my dear. Won’t you try? For me?” She asked.

Alcina couldn’t tell Miranda no. She trusted her. So, if Miranda thought this was a good idea, she was going to believe her. She nodded and immediately did what Miranda asked of her. She thought she would feel really uncomfortable afterward, but Miranda’s affection and praise washed all of it away. She would do anything for Miranda.

The blonde made sure Alcina was safe and she was very selective of the people she brought to meet her. Under no circumstances did she stray too far from Alcina as she worked and she always accompanied Alcina back home after she was done.

This arrangement went on for several months and Alcina began to primarily work the streets instead of dancing. She and Miranda made a good living for themselves. Miranda would scout out potential clients and Alcina would take care of the rest. Alcina was finally… Loved. Unconditionally.

But, all good things must come to an end, it seems.

Over the course of a few months, Alcina started noticing that Miranda looked… Tired. Gaunt… Sick. The sparkle in her gorgeous silver eyes dimmed. She barely ate and began to sleep a lot. Alcina urged Miranda to go see a doctor one day, but the blonde surprised her and sat her down, giving her a gentle smile. “Alcina, do you know how much I adore you, draga mea?” She asked and gently cupped her cheek.

Alcina nodded. “Of course, Miranda,” She said, confused by her question.

Miranda sighed and cleared her throat. “There’s… Something you need to know, my dear. You deserve the truth,” She said, looking down.

Alcina had a bad feeling. Something was wrong. “Okay…” She said quietly.

Miranda once again met Alcina’s gaze and gave her a heartbreaking smile. “Alcina. I’m… Dying, my dear,” Miranda revealed, a tear rolling down her cheek.

Alcina felt ice shoot through her veins. What? This can’t be true. No. The only person she had in this world… No. Alcina broke down. She began crying and screaming. Miranda’s heart ached at Alcina’s reaction. She wrapped her arms around the younger woman and shushed her softly. She felt… Guilty. She didn’t want Alcina to have to fend for herself.

“There must be something we can do!” Alcina pleaded through her tears.

Miranda smiled softly, but shook her head. “No, my dear. I am so sorry. We must accept what’s to come,” She said.

The two held each other and wept. They would be separated and there was nothing they could do about it.

Alcina took care of Miranda around the clock, but her health deteriorated fast, and two months later… She died peacefully in Alcina’s arms. Held by the one person who loved her the most.

Alcina was devastated. What was she going to do now? She closed in on herself. She drank. She slept. She cried. How could she go on? It wasn’t fair. All she wanted to do was hide herself away, but… She had bills to pay. She needed to start working again. Only this time, she’d have to do it alone.

And now, almost a year to the day of Miranda’s passing, Alcina once again found herself looking for customers. She shook away the tears that threatened to fall and bitterly flicked her cigarette away.

But, little did she know that, once again, someone would come into her life and change it for the better.

Enter you.

Note: Phew, this one was actually kind of challenging to write. I had trouble at parts conveying my ideas and trying to fit specific details in. Also, I want to make sure that I say I will not tolerate hateful comments about sex workers. This is a safe space and you will be blocked if you are disrespectful. Thank you. I hope you enjoyed!

Masterlist

#alcina dimitrescu #lady dimitrescu #re8 #re8 village #re8 lady dimitrescu #alcina dimitriscu x reader #lady dimitrescu x reader #alcina dimitrescu x y/n #mother miranda #alcina dimitrescu x reader #resident evil village #resident evil 8 #resident evil #resident evil imagines #lady dimitrescu x y/n #angst #angst drabble

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rinmession · 3 months

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Feeling a little sad for Rozenmarine in Lebkuchen/Freya's endings ngl. Spoilers and rambling below:

Of course to start, Not Being Gruesomely Sacrificed is always for the best in the scheme of things, but also: imagine living so much of your life with fate as a compass, being so thrilled to be with your soulmate after years of dreaming about her to the point you know her intimately without having met her, guiding her through a dream you're willing to die for-- and then out of nowhere, in only a week's time, that fate, that dream, is totally averted at the last minute.

Either Elise chooses someone else to die in Rozenmarine's stead and leaves to become a depressed aristocrat, is burned at the stake, or she abandons the ritual altogether and leaves Kieferberg with someone else, and in any case Rozenmarine's whole raison d'etre is gone... I wonder if it's almost worse on a personal level for her if Elise rejects the ritual and chooses someone else, because then what was Rozenmarine even there for? To give Elise the push she needed to leave I suppose, but then what's Rozenmarine to do with her life afterwards? Elise has a different soulmate who she wants to fulfill her dreams with, not her, and the person Rozenmarine says makes her whole is gone.

She says she's not necessarily Elise's soulmate even if Elise is hers, and that fate is something than can be changed, so she's certainly aware of other possibilities, but I wonder if she knows what to do with herself if the fate she's been chasing is so directly rejected.

Even with her happy ending in Star-Crossed where Elise says Rozenmarine 'broke free of her fate' after abandoning the ritual, she feels the need to go out on her own for two and some years and 'grow', learning new skills and taking on a whole career as a chimney sweep before she's ready to meet Elise. It's a bit vague, but she's certainly lost without the same fate that chained her, and needs to find new grounding for herself. As Elise needs to go out and find the world outside Kieferberg, Rozenmarine must go out and find things for herself that aren't Elise before she's ready for their new beginning. Even though she's with Elise as she's always wanted, this wasn't the plan! How much more disruptive it must be to lose that sense of fate without Elise, without any purpose or person to rebuild herself for.

And just to twist the knife a bit, Rozenmarine in her own route--as happy as she is to be with Elise at last--expresses her remorse that she couldn't have come to Kieferberg earlier, or even been born there to make memories with Elise and feel like she's part of a community. She pointedly compares herself to Leb and Freya here, which makes me wonder how that envy must extend to endings where they're the apple of Elise's eye. How much more bittersweet an experience it must be to only have that happiness for a week before it's snatched from your hands...

So what then becomes of her then when she doesn't show up at all in Leb or Freya's endings (besides, strangely silent, in the background of Auto-da-Fe), when she doesn't have Elise as a tether? Lebkuchen and Freya both appear in one another's happy endings at least, so I think it's intentional. Lost without fate and without her soulmate to aim towards, perhaps it's too much for her to stay on in Kieferberg without Elise after having reached the end of the line on her star-lit path, and so she returns to her nomadic life as a now aimless wanderer, knowing nothing else. Maybe as Elise could never feel like a part of Kieferberg without Holle, Rozenmarine cannot feel a part of them without Elise. More hopefully, perhaps her experience in Kieferberg allows her to reinvent herself as in Star-Crossed, however hard the heartbreak. Rozenmarine characterizes the scales of her treasured pinecone in one of her dates as all part of her path to Elise, but maybe in that same metaphor there's a dot of hope for her she says herself, and there are more scales for her yet to find...

#real rozenmarine sad girl hours you have been warned #lgts #little goody two shoes #rozenmarine lgts #little goody two shoes spoilers #lgts spoilers #can you tell i listened to wild and wandering thistle before i wrote this

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ayoalex · 1 month

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My brain is so funny, decided to rewatch ATLA (again) and for some reason got obsessed with Azula (I've always liked her tho, just... Something in my brain started itching this time around), so of course started reading meta analysis of her and azula centric fics and wanted to give my 2 cents (that no one asked).

After the Spirit Temple she just goes solo for like 2 months rewinding on what she saw there until she's like "I need to reinvent myself" and decided to get a buzzcut but like it's really fucked up and this one nice lady finds her like u find a stray cat with a really fuck up haircut and it's like "this kid is totally going through puberty but like... Mental illness" and decides to help her with the buzzcut.

So Azula finds herself helping this nice lady and her wife in their restaurant in some part of the Earth Kingdom.

She stills trains and pretty much continues evolving her bending but at the same time she does a lot of reflection about herself, her relationships with other people and her nation.

Without realizing she gets adopted by the lesbian couple. They are smart adults that saw a very much homeless kid and decided to give her love and shelter and Azula is weird and awkward about it at the beginning but this helps her realise a lot of things about her family.

So she's like soft now in the sense she just minds her own business and likes to pet cats around her neighbor but at the same time she's still a bit mean and quick with her tongue.

Her hair grows and one time she sees like someone from her past and boom, war flashbacks, buzzcut time once again but this time... She asks for HELP.

Basically I think Azula deserves and need a support system while healing.

Personally I think she ends up as a masc lesbian but I could be projecting.

She also goes back to Fire Nation with her two moms and presents them to her family and it's like

"Moms, this is Mother, Uncle and Zuzu" and it's a pretty awkward dinner for the 3 of them, Azula is having a blast and her 2 moms are loving seeing her baby pictures.

Also something something her and Toph are besties now.

#azula #azula atla #atla #princess azula #damn azula who gave u 3 moms?#also azula doesn't really give a fuck about royalty in canon #so i dont see her going back to the whole royalty business #she seems like super chill #i see her liking to fighting #so she probably like travels around to find strong martial artists and just fight #something like Goku i guess

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thefallennightmare · 6 months

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Miracle-epilogue

*gif created by me. feel free to use, simply give credit*

Pairings: Noah Sebastian x Reader

Warnings/Tropes: forced proximity, slight enemies to lovers, slow burn, smut, angst, fluff, mentions of death, and swearing.

Summary: Reader is the merch girl for Bad Omens. It wasn't what she wanted to do with her life but when her mother got sick with Alzheimer's, reader took a job where she could to help with the costs. She thought it would be a one-time gig but the longer she was on the road with them, the harder she fell for Noah Sebastian; even if he wanted nothing to do with her. She needed a miracle to save her mom and her future.

Author Note: I couldn't stay away from these characters or this universe. I hope you all enjoy! Also, thanks @thescarlettvvitch for the small idea 😉

Tags: @ada-clarence @nonamessblog @thescarlettvvitch @malice-ov-mercy @crimson-calligraphyx @theoneandonlykymberlee @yumikitten @blackveilomens @cherrymedicine13 @thebadchic @notmaddihealy @jay02bo @beaker1636 @jakekiszkasguitarpick @punk-pr1ncessxoxo @er3nslovergirl @iamdesolate @lma1986 @jessitpwk @themodern-daywednesday @writethrough @bngurngheart @dreams-that-are-anwsered @loeytuan98 @omens-in-reverse @loverofagoodbeard @jay02bo @niicoleleigh @tearfallpixie @cupidsdreams

MOOD BOARD created by @madomens

The crowd cheered wildly behind me as I scurried in front of the barricade; the camera hanging loosely around my neck. Bryan and I gave each other a high five as we passed each other for me to come to a stop center stage, eyes gazing up at the man in front of me. His eyes shined as he spoke into the microphone, thanking everyone for coming out to another sold out show; the last show of the tour. The last night was always electric, exciting, and from the energy radiating from the crowd behind me, they felt the same.

“We only have a few songs left tonight,” Noah began only to be cut off by a loud ruckus of cheers. “But we can’t thank you all enough for your continue support and love for the last couple years ever since we blew up. We were this small town band from Virgina that moved to Los Angeles with a dream; one that came true.”

Noah’s eyes darted down to me and winked, a warm hue covering my cheeks. “And for some of us, we had a few extra dreams come true.”

With a bashful gaze, I mouthed three simple words up to him.

“I love you.”

The corners of his lips lifted as his eyes now sparkled, blowing me a soft kiss then started into Enough, Enough Now. This tour was all about their older songs, with of course their hits from their current album, but Bad Omens wanted to reinvent their older songs.

I let out a deep breath, stretching out the pain in my back and abdomen before busying myself switching between pictures and videos of all the guys for the next few songs. As I was walking down the steps from Folio’s drum stage, I nearly missed the last step and almost tumbled to the floor until familiar arms wrapped around me.

“Angel,” Noah hissed. “What did I say about walking around on the stage in the dark?”

Thankfully, it was a quick break in between the last two songs as the video intro started for the next one so our conversation was hushed.

“I’m fine,” I reassured him while standing on two feet. “I missed the last step, that’s all.”

His eyes narrowed under the stage lights while I brushed away the hair from his face. He decided on letting his hair grow again and it was almost a comb over across his forehead. He looked ethereal cast in the red stage lights as Jolly started strumming the first few notes of Concrete Jungle.

But I noticed he didn’t move, only continued to stare at me with those intense dark eyes and hands on his hips.

“Noah,” I sighed. “I have to work still.”

“I know, angel. All I’m asking is that you’re careful, alright? I don’t want anything to risk-,” His hands reached for mine and gave them a gentle squeeze.

“I will,” I promised while cupping his cheek. “I’ll be more careful.”

Noah gave me a small smile before laying a gentle kiss on my forehead, something the crowd noticed and cheered loudly. Pushing him back to the center of the stage, I giggled while walking to the side of the stage where I noticed Matt watching with a smirk.

“A bit of a difference from last tour, huh?” He asked while crossing his arms over his chest.

I hummed in agreement and stood next to him, opting to watch the rest of the show instead of take pictures, and thought back to how last tour went. It was about a month after Noah and I got married and I was still apprehensive about letting the fans know about us. We got married pretty soon after our engagement, less than a year, but that was only because we didn’t want to waste another second once Bad Omens finished writing their current record. Noah offered we could get married while they were writing but I declined, telling him he should only focus on one thing. The ceremony was quiet, in a hushed location in Washington, where afterwards Noah and I stayed for a month in the same cabin that he proposed in. We kept the marriage a secret for the first year since Bad Omens were about to go on tour overseas, one I of course followed with. Even though we were married, I continued to work for them as their social media ambassador; until the last few months.

Reading some of the darker side of the comments on posts or online didn’t sit well with me mentally, along with some personal things I was dealing with, so after a deep conversation with Noah, we decided it would be best if I continued taking pictures and videos alongside Bryan but they would have someone else posts and take care of the social media accounts. The entire tour overseas, Noah and I kept our relationship quiet and while he was on stage, we kept it professional, much to his dismay. But he always understood why we needed to keep it that way. We rarely went out in public just the two of us to avoid any untrue rumors and when we went out as a group with everyone, we did our best not to make it seem like we were together.

It was fucking brutal, and we hated every second of it. It was getting in the middle of our marriage and made the first year exhausting and heartbreaking when it should have been filled with love and joy. There was a night where we had an intense argument that Noah went to spend the night at his old place with Jolly and the rest of the guys while I stayed back at the home we were creating for ourselves. I didn’t sleep even for a few minutes that night and neither did Noah because I felt him crawling back into our bed hours later, leaving a soft kiss to my head.

“I’m sorry, angel,” he murmured while brushing away the dried tears from my face.

Now, we were both at a better place, mentally, that I felt comfortable with our marriage being out in the open. If people found out, good for them. It wasn’t because I was ashamed or didn’t want to be seen with Noah. In fact, it was the opposite. I loved Noah with my entire fucking soul. He was the miracle I’d been searching for.

So before this tour began, about four weeks ago on our first anniversary, Noah posted a 24 hour story on his Instagram, with my permission of course.

It was the picture. The one from that first party all those years ago, back during Noah’s long hair era. There were three simply words typed across the picture, ones that started a frenzy.

Happy anniversary, wife.

In return, I posted a picture of Noah and I, one that Bryan took on that one tour so long ago. It was back when we were sort of dating and the night of the storage closet. It was that moment after the show when I was sitting on Noah’s lap, playing with his necklace as he kissed my lips. Unbeknownst to us, Bryan took our picture.

My caption mirrored Noah’s: Happy anniversary, husband.

Matt nudged my arm, bringing me back to the present, and I hummed in response to his words.

“What did you say?”

He snickered while nodding towards Noah, who was giving a bow to the crowd as they cheered for one more song.

“I’m glad you came with. I know last tour was kind of rough for you two.”

I nodded. “Yeah but we worked past those issues. We’re in a good place, finally.”

“Good,” Matt smiled. “Because I don’t know if I could handle crabby Noah for another tour.”

Just as he finished speaking, Noah ran up to me and wrapped me in his arms, breathing in my scent. I giggled while leaving kisses along his shoulder, the salty taste of his sweat bittersweet on my tongue.

“Are you okay?” He asked while pulling away slightly so he could look down at me.

I rolled my eyes. “Yes, I’m fine.”

The rest of the guys bounded up behind Noah as he wrapped an arm around my shoulder to pull me into his chest.

“Usual last night tradition?” Noah asked.

My heart rate picked up, and I wrapped myself tighter around him, the nerves beginning to lock me into place. This was something we talked about for awhile now and I knew it was coming, but I was still so nervous to see how everyone would react.

They had the tradition on the last night of the tour to sit in the back of the bus and play Mario Cart until the wee hours of the morning. But this time, Noah and I had a little something extra planned.

Jolly nodded. “Of course.”

“That is if Y/N remembered to bring the game,” Folio gave me shit as we began walking back to the green room.

“Oh my gods,” I groaned. “Yes, I forgot it on the last tour but did you forget how many stores I went to find it? Spent my entire afternoon running around so you idiots could play it.”

Nick chuckled. “Are you going to join us this time?”

Noah squeezed my shoulder, but we both kept a neutral face.

“Nope. It’s your guy’s thing. I already planned on laying in my bunk and reading a book,” I said as we walked into the green room.

“You can, angel,” Noah said as he reluctantly let me go so I could pack up my things.

I smirked at his rouse and threw over one of his sweaters, it almost drowning me in it, and walked up to him leaving a peck on his lips.

“Please tell me you remembered the bag?” I mumbled against his lips.

His hands squeezed my hips. “It’s in your bunk, ready to go.”

I brushed away the sweat matted hair from his forehead so I could look directly into his eyes. I wanted to make sure the both of us were one hundred perfect on board with this decision. Noah was the one that brought up the idea last night and while I was still apprehensive, I agreed. They deserved to know; soon they would have found out if we didn’t say anything.

“You’re sure? What if we have another-.”

Noah wrapped a hand against the side of my neck and lifted my chin with his thumb. “We waited long enough, angel. We’ll be okay, we were before. This time, if it happens, we’ll have the support of everyone.”

Tears burned in my eyes as memories of the past came flooding back, something Noah noticed, because he pulled me into his chest and rubbed soothing circles against my back. His lips brushed along my hairline as his sweet words eased the pain that sat low in my heart. It never went away; it continued to fester there, stabbing the knife deeper and deeper. Especially now.

“It won’t, angel,” Noah reassured me, his own sniffles being muffled by my hair. “This time will be different. It already is.”

I smiled into his shirt when I realized he was right. This time is different, and there was already proof of it.

“Okay so before we start,” Noah spoke as we all lounged in the back area of the bus, it driving us the twelve hour drive back to Los Angeles.

“She forgot the game!” Folio bellowed while sitting up taller on the couch.

I stuck my tongue out at him. “Fuck off, Folio.”

Noah hushed my words with a pat to my knee before he set a small gift bag on the floor in front of both Nick’s and Jolly, who stared at it with a raised brow.

“What is this?” He asked.

“That’s the whole point of a gift. You’re supposed to open it to see,” Noah urged with a nod.

Noah’s knee bounced with anticipation and I rested a hand against his thigh to ease him and he placed his hand over mine to link them together. We shared a loving gaze, one he ended with a wink and smirk as we watched Jolly pull out the first gift.

“Naruto socks?” He asked with a raised brow, confusion etched in his voice.

“Dude, these aren’t even in your size,” Folio snatched them and eyed them. “They look like they could fit a kid.”

I bit the inside of my cheek to keep my smile away.

Noah rubbed the back of his neck. “Yeah, about that.”

Nick then pulled out a Bad Omens beanie, bright white letters on the back that only Noah and I could read.

“It’s a new design,” Noah said when they all eyed it with curious eyes. “Its an infant size.”

The three of them shared a quick look before Nick turned over the beanie and his body went stiff when he read the writing on the back.

Sebastian.

With the infant beanie and infant size socks, the wheels were turning for them. But to give them that little of extra help, I held out my phone towards them; the black and white sonogram catching their attention immediately.

“No fucking way,” Nick said.

“You’re not fucking with us, are you?” Jolly asked with a small smile.

“My name is literally right there,” I chukled while showing them the part of the sonogram where it read Y/N Sebastian.

Folio smacked his hands together while letting out a loud yelp of celebration as he all but tackled me deeper onto the couch in a vice like hug. With a fit of giggles, I wrapped my own arms around him.

“Nick! She’s fucking fragile, man,” Noah cursed while pushing him off of me to pull me into his lap, large arms wrapping around me now protectively.

I kissed his forehead. “I’m not made of glass, Noah.”

His face grew stone serious. “Yes, you are.”

My shoulders fell, knowing there was a reason he’d been so protective. Not just tonight but since we found out four months ago. Only this time, we wanted to make sure we made it past this point before telling anyone.

Jolly quickly picked up on the seriousness of our conversation but waited until a round of congratulations and hugs were had before settling back into the couch.

“How far along?” He wondered.

Now sitting curled up against Noah’s warm embrace, I sighed into his chest. “Almost five months.”

Nick’s eyes widened. “How the hell didn’t we notice?”

“She wore baggy clothes. We wanted to make sure-,” Noah’s words trailed off, unable to find the courage to finish.

“Uh,” I began while sitting straight up. “I only have a small bump so it made it easy to hide. But there’s a reason we kept it secret for so long. Before this pregnancy, we suffered through two miscarriages.”

The guys sucked in a breath while Noah stiffened next to me. Even though he was strong during those two dark times in our marriage, I knew he was doing it for me. Deep down, he suffered through those losses on his own and was still dealing with it.

“Shit,” Jolly ran a hand through his hair.

“Please don’t say the typical I’m sorry bullshit. We don’t want to hear that,” I smiled weakly. “It was hard for us but we got through it. We just want to focus on now and what the future holds for this baby. And us.”

Noah rested a hand over my bump, eyes glittering as he stared lovingly at me.

“Oh,” he said while reluctantly looking away from me over towards teh guys. “Don’t go saying shit. If Jesse doesn't find out from me, he’d be so hurt.”

“Rightfully so,” I nodded with a smirk.

That night, the game was forgotten as we all talked about the future of not only Bad Omens but also the future of its newest little member.

A soft knock sounded on the door frame behind me and I looked over my shoulder, giving a small smile to Noah. He was shirtless as he leaned up against the doorframe, eyes tired but bright with so much love and adoration. His usual Levi cut a mess on top of his head. He knew how much I loved that haircut so instead of cutting it when it got too long; he was sporting that look again.

“Why are you awake? You should be sleeping.”

Fuck, his tired voice was so sexy but at almost nine months pregnant, that was the last thing I wanted to think about. I loved my husband and our sex life was amazing but I was miserable the last month, wanting the pains in my back and hips to stop. I reminded him once or twice that he could watch that sex tape we made a few years ago.

“I can’t sleep,” I shrugged from my spot on the floor of the almost ready nursery.

An array of pieces and an instruction manual lay at my feet, something Noah eyed with a brow. “Angel, I told you I’d put the crib together in the morning. You shouldn’t be doing it by yourself.”

He sat on the floor in front of me and reached for my hands, taking away the screwdrivers and set them into the pile of tools.

“I know. I thought I could get a head start on it though,” I began cracking my knuckles.

Noah sighed as he wrapped one large hand over both of my small ones. “I hate when you do that.”

“Sorry,” I looked away from him. “Nervous habit.”

“Are you nervous for Friday?”

I nodded while finally meeting his gaze. “There’s all these risks for C-sections. What if something happens and-.”

Noah hushed my worries with a firm kiss to my lips, his tongue brushing over my bottom lips before exploring every inch of my mouth. I moaned into the kiss and rested my hands against his bare chest, nails scraping along the tattooed skin.

“We’ve already gone over all the risk factors,” Noah sighed while pulling away, resting his forehead against mine. “But it’s the only way, angel.”

With his hand over my large bump, I nodded. “I know.”

We sat like this for a long moment, enjoying the silence and solace of the nursery. It was a simple design, nothing too over the top. But we made it special with pictures of everyone that mattered to us; our family. The center picture was the one of Noah and I from that party; thatpicture.

“Noah?”

My voice broke the silence, and he gave me a small smile. “What is it?”

I blew out a shaky breath. “What if I’m not a good mom? What if I get Alzheimers like my mom did and treat our baby the way she treated me?”

These worries weighed heavy on my mind from the second we found out I was pregnant; this time. The worry if I would be a good enough mother and treat them with love and honesty; not the way my mother did for me.

All these years later after her death and I still couldn’t find it in my heart to forgive her. I might have moved on, but the pain was still buried deep, sometimes clawing its way out. There was also the fear of if I’d get Alzheimers as I got older. Noah always had the same answer; we’ll figure it out if that time comes. Let just focus on the now.

As the tears fell, Noah was quick on my side to pull me into him, us resting against the wall of the nursery.

“You’re going to be a great mom, angel. I already know that because you take care of everyone before yourself. It won’t be hard but I’m going to be with you by your side through it all. Even if you get Alzheimers, I’ll record myself telling you we’re married so you don’t forget me.”

I couldn’t stop the small giggle that fell from my lips and pressed a small kiss to his chest before gazing up at him. “It’s the hormones.”

Bullshit, his eyes shined.

“Come on,” he kissed the side of my head. “This crib isn’t going to put itself together.”

“Angel, sit down. Let me get your water for you,” Noah hissed when he saw me trying to stand from the couch.

“But-,” I spoke.

His eyes pinned me in place as he held my bottle of water in one arm and the small infant in the other. Noah’s hair was a mess and his black shirt had a few spots of spit up but none of that bothered him. Even through exhaustion, he still wore the proudest smile on his face. We returned home from the hospital a few days ago and spent that time just the three of us, finding our ways as a family.

This entire pregnancy was constant fear and worry if we’d lose our baby like we did previously. I still didn’t believe he was real until I held him; Noah’s eyes staring back up at me as our baby's name fell from my lips.

Kenji Noah Sebastian.

“Thank you,” I thanked him with a kiss as Noah handed me my water bottle.

“I love you,” he muttered against them.

“I love you too.”

The noise coming from the kitchen made us raise our brows in confusion.

“Are you sure it’s a good idea to let Folio filet a fish in our kitchen?” I asked.

Noah shrugged as he gazed down at our son, a wide smile on his face as he rocked him. “He wants to cook us dinner. Let him.”

Kenji began fussing in Noah’s arms but before I could offer to feed him, Noah shot me another look. “You were up all night with him, angel.”

“Yeah but you’ve been dealing with him all day. Kenji hasn’t stopped fussing.”

Noah brushed a finger along the side of Kenji’s face, his black wedding band catching the light from above. “They have cut you through six layers of skin and had your insides moved around to give birth to our baby. You need to rest, angel.”

With a pouted lip, I held out my arms. “Can I atleast hold him while you make a bottle?”

Once Kenji was in my arms, Noah bent low to leave another kiss on my lips before retreated into the kitchen where he heard Folio and Jesse arguing about something. Tonight, we had a full house of our family who came to visit us and meet Kenji.

Jolly sat down on the couch next to me, finger immediately being grasped my Kenji’s small hand.

“Y/N, your genes didn’t even try. That’s a printed copy of Noah. You just gave birth to Noah,” Jolly smirked while making funny faces down to Kenji.

“Gee thanks, it’s not like I grew him,” I grumbled playfully.

Noah returned and sat on the other side of me, taking a now sleeping Kenji to lay him against his chest, him brushing a gentle kiss across the baby’s forehead. I smiled wide and felt my heart spread warmth all throughout my body at the sight.

Never did I think that when I first started working for Bad Omens that I would be married to the vocalist and have a child with him. Our relationship might not have been perfect in the beginning but through all the hardships of the two miscarriages and all the fights that stemmed from it, we never gave up.

As I brushed through the thick dark locks of Kenji’s hair, a mirror image to Noah, I heard a quiet sniffle next to me and realized Noah was holding back tears. They pooled at the corner of his eyes but refused to let them slip. Always the stoic one but I could see that he was running through so many emotions.

“What are you thinking about?” I questioned.

His bottom lip trembled. “Just everything. How far we’ve come. The Airbnb, the pop up event you put together, our fight where I said hurtful things to you.”

I cupped his cheek. “Please stop beating yourself up about it, Noah. All has been forgiven.”

“But I can't help but wonder what would have happened if you didn’t forgive me. Would we be sitting here together? With our son on my chest?”

Noah placed another tender kiss to Kenji’s head, who stirred in his sleep.

With his free hand, I linked our fingers together my thumb tracing over the faded angel wings tattoo.

“I think we would have found our way back to each other,” I said matter-of-factly.

That made him smile just the tiniest bit but I could tell the darkness that still held tight to him. As he blew out a breath, a few tears fell.

“The fire, I think, haunts me to this day. I know you’ve overcome your nightmares from it but I can't even let a candle burn without thinking of seeing you hang from the house.”

“I didn’t know that,” I breathed, shocked.

While I overcame the trauma from the fire, I didn’t realize Noah was still dealing with it.

“Fuck,” he sighed while running a hand over his face to brush away the tears. “I didn’t mean to get so emotional.”

I brushed away another stray tear with my finger, the wedding band catching the light from above. “It’s the lack of sleep.”

Noah agreed with a chuckle and stared down at Kenji again, who was making soft coos in his sleep. Suddenly a large smile broke out across Noah’s face, instantly brightening up the room.

“All I ever wanted was a family of my own. I made one with my friends, but you, angel,” Noah squeezed my hand. “You gave me something I don’t even have words for.”

“Hey, you helped,” I rested my head against his shoulder.

Noah laid his chin on top of my head, chest shaking with his deep breath, which did nothing to bother the sleeping baby. “But you did everything, you gave my life new meaning. Thank you. You gave me that fucking miracle, angel.”

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