#right when i said i was gonna do them consistently too. like IMMEDIATELY | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

hischierswhore · 21 days

Text

eternal pining | jack hughes

pairing: childhood bff!reader x jack hughes

warnings: major angst // unrequited pining // slight cursing // probably other stuff that i missed

author’s note: this might be the longest fic i’ve ever written??? anyways i’m backkkk and hopefully i’ll start being consistent soon. i have so much planned and this has been in the works for quite a while now.

You were sitting on the couch at the Hughes lake house as you discussed your plans for the day. Well, more like you were listening to Ellen & Jim as they told you that they would be leaving on a trip for a few days and Jack was just there. He was on his phone, typing aggressively like the world would end if he didn’t finish whatever he was typing.

A sigh left Ellen’s lips when she realized that her middle child wasn’t even paying attention to what she was saying. You looked at Luke & Quinn, who both also saw that he was just not focusing. Quinn extended his arm to hit Jack’s knee in attempt to get his attention.

You said bye to Ellen & Jim, wishing them a safe trip before helping them carry their bags to their car. As you made your way back inside, you plopped right back into the same spot you were in before.

Moments passed and you turned your phone off, sparking conversation with Quinn & Luke about what the groups plans were for today.

“What do you guys wanna do?” You asked, hoping someone would come up with something fun.

“Boat day?” Luke suggested and you nodded in agreement.

“Are you gonna join us, Jack?” you questioned as you turned around to look at your best friend. His eyes didn’t shift from the device in his hands, causing you to roll your eyes.

You were annoyed, so you moved off the couch and walked to your room to change into your swimsuit.

"Where are you guys going?" Jack asked as you, Quinn & Luke walked towards the deck, his phone now off and on the couch.

"Boat day. We were talking about it but you were too indulged in your phone to even contribute to the conversation" Quinn stated as Jack's mouth formed an 'o' shape.

"Are you joining us or not?" Luke asked, waiting for his brother to respond so he could finally get some sun.

“Oh uh yeah. I'll join y'all. Just give me a few to change" He hopped up from his spot on the couch and went to his room to change while you made your way outside, the other Hughes brothers following.

10 minutes passed and Jack had not yet come outside. You were all getting rather impatient and annoyed with the boy.

"Can we just go without him?" Luke sighed, beyond frustrated with his brother. Just as he said that, the boy trotted out of the house and down the dock to where you all sat. You all immediately noticed his lack of swim trunks and rather a button-down shirt & some jeans.

"Hey guys. Sorry to bail on you all but I've got a date in like-" He looks down at his phone for a moment to check the time. "20 minutes so I've gotta get going. See you all later" Jack waved as he hugged everyone goodbye.

Your heart shattered the moment you heard "a date". You had been hopelessly in love with your best friend since you were kids. You'd known the Hughes brothers since you were 6, and you'd all been inseparable since day 1.

The ever-growing crush you had on Jack was evident to everyone around you except for him. Quinn and Luke would relentlessly tease you when you three were together. Hell, even Trevor and Nico would join in on the teasing whenever you saw them.

You faked a smile at his words, hoping he couldn’t see the tears welling in your eyes. You looked around at Quinn and Luke, who had already been looking in your direction, knowing damn well what you were thinking.

"Have fun, J. See you later" You said as you looked down, seeing as your mood had now been more ruined than it was before and you didn't want to deal with all your emotions, or rather the cause of these emotions, right now. You knew that if you made eye-contact with the boy, you would have a breakdown.

Jack jogs back up to the house and shuts the patio door, leaving you and the two other Hughes brothers on the boat for the day.

2 pairs of eyes immediately found your figure as you curled into a ball on the couch and let it all out. Both boys immediately came to your side for comfort, knowing how difficult this must be for you.

Luke rubbed your back as you sobbed while Quinn held you in his arms, holding you ever so carefully.

Hours passed before you all decided to head inside.

“I’m gonna head up to my room. If he asks, I'm out. I don't want to talk to him right now" You told the remaining brothers before going into your room and locking yourself away.

— later —

Jack arrived back at the lake house.

“Hey, where’s Y/n?” He asked as he wandered into the living room, noticing his brothers sitting on the couch watching a movie but you were nowhere in sight.

“She went out” Quinn simply said, not feeling the need to give his younger brother details.

"Out? What do you mean she went out?"

"She's not here, Jack. She wanted to go out so she did" Luke shrugged, trying to focus his attention back on the movie.

"And you both let her go by herself?!" Jack was practically shouting.

"She's 22 years old, Jack. She can make her own decisions" Quinn paused the movie to turn his attention to his brother. Jack let out a huff and sat next to his brothers to watch whatever movie they had put on, still ever so slightly upset that you had gone out without him.

20 minutes had passed since that initial exchange when Luke's phone got a notification. He glanced down at it and immediately got up and excused himself to the kitchen with a simple "I'll be back".

“What’s up with him?” Jack whispered to Quinn, who shrugged and paid no mind to his brother's curiosity. Moments later, Luke emerged from the kitchen and raced upstairs quickly.

You had texted Luke asking him to bring you some medication for the growing migraine you had from crying nonstop. He quietly knocked on the door to avoid attracting Jack's attention. You slowly unlocked the door and let the boy in as he handed you the pills and a bottle of water.

"You good?" He asked as you had a hand on your forehead and your eyes were red & puffy.

"I'll be fi-" The words got lost in your throat as you heard footsteps ascending the stairs and you saw the one person you did not want to see: Jack.

You muttered "shit" as you tried to hide behind Luke's tall frame, which was to no avail.

"Y/n? What're you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be out?" Jack asked as he made his way to your doorway.

"I uhh, came back early. Didn't feel too great" You lied through your teeth.

"How'd you come in? And when did you even come in?" Jack questioned you as he leaned against the door frame.

"Came in through the back door. Didn't wanna make too much noise to interrupt the movie" You slowly tried to push your door closed, but Jack was blocking the way.

Luke was stood there, watching the encounter unfold.

"Oh what's that Quinn? We need more popcorn? I'll grab some" He shouted down the stairs to remove himself from the extremely tense conversation he was witnessing.

“What’s wrong?” Jack's voice was low as he slowly pushed the door open and grabbed your hand.

“I’m fine, Jack. I just don’t feel good” You were on the verge of tears as you pulled yourself out of his hold.

“You look like you've been crying, Y/n/n... did someone say something to you?" Jack's anger slowly increasing at the thought of someone hurting your feelings.

"Nobody said anything. More so what you did. But I'll be fine, I'll get over it" Thankfully, he had back up enough to give you space to close the door, and his reflexes weren't fast enough to grab the door handle before you shut and locked it, leaving him on the other side of the door.

Your words left Jack extremely confused. More so what you did. What in the hell did he even do?

Once you had locked the door, you slid down the back of it as more tears spilled freely onto your cheeks. Why did you have to fall for your best friend?

Jack stomped down the stairs, confusion & frustration written all over his face as he threw himself onto the couch.

“What the hell did I even do?” He screamed into one of the cushions. Quinn & Luke exchange a look before ultimately deciding to tell him bits of the truth.

“You went on that date” Luke said quietly, praying that Jack has heard him the first time so he wouldn’t have to repeat himself. Fortunately for Luke, Jack lifted his head up as soon as the words left his mouth.

“What does that have to do with anything?” Jack was more confused than before. He didn’t understand what was going on.

“How is it that we all see it except for you, dude? She’s in love with you. She’s been in love with you for years now, and you’ve never once noticed or acknowledged her feelings. It’s evident to everyone in our lives except for you. You leaving on that date today made her feel like shit” Quinn spoke.

“Well, it made her feel more like shit than she already did before. You neglected her all morning because you were on your phone and then when we all agreed to go on the boat, you bailed on us and she felt more forgotten than ever before” Luke added onto Quinn’s speech.

Jack sat there in shock. There’s no way that you, his best friend of 16 years, were in love with him. He couldn’t fathom the thought, but slowly the realization sank in and now he felt horrible for his behavior. He didn’t mean to hurt you. He never knew.

He didn’t say anything before he raced up the stairs and knocked on your door but received no response.

“Y/n please let me in. I want to talk to you. Please hear me out” Jack pleaded as he rested his ear against the door, listening closely in hopes of hearing movement on the other side.

Silence. All that could be heard was the sound of the fan circulating air throughout the room.

Quinn & Luke had followed him up the stairs and watched as Jack slowly fell to his knees infront of your door. They’d never seen him like this before.

“J, she needs some space right now. Let her get some rest and talk to her in the morning. It’s the least she deserves” Luke suggested as he placed his hand on his brother’s shoulder.

— the next morning —

You woke up to a massive migraine, probably from all the crying you did last night. You felt uneasy as you stood from your bed and made your way to the connected bathroom.

You knew you’d have to see him again. You couldn’t avoid him, hell it was his house.

You braced yourself for the day as you washed your face and changed into something more comfortable before heading downstairs for breakfast.

You overheard a conversation taking place as you silently made your way down the stairs, in hopes of not alerting anyone of your presence quite yet.

Just as you turned the corner and entered the kitchen, silence filled the room. You chose to not acknowledge it, just as Jack had not acknowledged your feelings for him.

You felt multiple pairs of eyes on you as you grabbed yourself a bowl to pour some cereal. You slowly carried your bowl to the dining room, where everyone was seated.

It was only then that you had noticed the extra eyes staring at you. Seated at the table included Quinn, Luke, Jack, Trevor, Cole & Nico. The latter 3 must’ve flown in early in the morning because they weren’t here last night when everything happened.

You softly wave at the 3 boys before placing your bowl on the table.

“Morning” you quietly said as you sat on the bench between Quinn & Luke, which was ironically as far away from Jack as possible.

Small talk is made and you barely speak unless you’re spoken to. You quietly converse with everyone except for the middle Hughes brother. He hasn’t said a single thing to you this morning except for stare at you occasionally when he thought you didn’t notice. Of course you did, you always noticed.

Breakfast finished & you kindly collected everyone’s dishes and headed towards the kitchen to clean them.

You stood infront of the sink on your own for about 5 minutes when you felt a presence behind you.

“Can we talk?” You knew that notice all too well. You placed the plate in the sink as you turned around slowly, resting the plane of your hands on the edge of the counter.

You took in his appearance for the first time since he left for his date yesterday afternoon. His eyes were swollen, much like yours, and his hands were fidgeting at the back of his neck.

“Sure” You simply spoke, not wanting to be the one to bring up the elephant in the room. Jack cleared his throat before he spoke.

“Could we maybe go outside? I’ll get Luke to do the dishes or something so we can talk in private” He suggested as you nodded your head.

Jack led the way to the backyard before holding the door open with a simple “After you”.

You sat on the couch next to the fire pit, leaving Jack to sit next to you.

You sat in silence for a moment, enjoying the calming breeze the morning had brought. That peace was interrupted when Jack cleared his throat and turned to face you.

“I want to start with an apology. I genuinely had no idea that you even felt neglected yesterday. I was a shit friend and I shouldn’t have ditched you for someone else. I know I messed up. And I’m sorry that it’s taken me til now to realize how you feel towards me. All this time I thought it was just you being friendly, I never knew you liked me. I was so confused by what you meant yesterday that the realization didn’t click until Luke & Quinn said it. I couldn’t believe the fact that I had been the one to hurt you and I will forever be sorry for that”

Jack looked into your eyes, and he swears he could see your heart shatter into a million pieces at every word. God, how he wishes he wasn’t the reason behind it.

“I’ve been in love with you since we were 6, Jack. I’ve spent years pining after you, only to watch you pine after every other girl on this planet. This summer was different though. You paid no mind to other girls and you treated me like I was yours, and I stupidly believed that things would change between us. That was until yesterday. You act all lovey with me one second and then suddenly I’m nonexistent the next” You watched the frown grow on his face as you spoke.

“I’ve never been in a relationship because I’ve been holding out hope for you, Jack. Hope for you to finally come to your senses and see that I’ve been here waiting for you this whole time, stupidly thinking that my chance will come” Jack stayed quiet as you let it all out.

“I’m in love with you, Jack. I have been for the longest time and I really shouldn’t be” You cried into the hands as he stared at you in silence.

“Y/n/n…” Jack was at a loss for words. He didn’t know you felt that strongly about him, or that you watched everything unfold from the sidelines of his life.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you, Y/n/n”

“It’s okay, Jack. I’ll be fine, I’ll get over it. I just don’t know if I handle anymore heartbreak” You sobbed as Jack brought you into his embrace, holding you in his arms.

Despite you feeling this hurricane of emotions, his arms still felt like home to you. He felt like home.

“I hope I’m not too late” He whispered softly, causing you to remove yourself from is hold, a look of confusion spread across your face.

“Huh?” You sniffled as you wiped your nose.

“I’ve been in love with you from the moment I met you. Not even, the second I saw you holding that little bear of yours as you walked into your new house, I knew you were someone special. Someone who would be the only consistent person in my life besides my family. I always thought you saw me as a friend and never anything more, hence all the failed relationships. I’ve tried to get over you so much since I thought you’d never return the feeling. I looked for you in other girls, but none of them were you, so they never lasted. You have been the only person I have truly wanted since we were 6, Y/n/n. I now know that you’ve felt the same this entire time, and I have somehow misread everything for 16 years. The timing of this is horrible and I’m afraid I may be too late, but please know I do love you, Y/n/n. I always have & I always will” Jack confessed as he held your hand in his.

You searched his eyes for some sign of this being a sick and twisted joke, a prank that would forever haunt you and ultimately be the end of your friendship with the boy.

But you found none of that. You found love & hope & sadness. He hoped that the love he had for you was enough to fill the hole of sadness that he had accidentally burned into your heart. He hoped that you would forgive him and give him a chance to redeem himself.

A shy smile appeared on your face before you removed your hands from his to wipe the tears on your face, and the tears that were slowly trickling down his.

“I love you too, J. You’ll always have a chance” A goofy smile took over your face as the boy brought you into a tight hug, holding you there for what felt like an eternity.

After who know how long, he finally pulled away and let you breathe.

“I’m so happy right now that I could kiss you, but I won’t solely because we just made up and I’m not trying to ruin my chances & lose you again”

“Oh shut up” You placed both hands on the sides of his face & pulled him for a kiss.

The world felt like it had stopped but like it was also spinning simultaneously. The butterflies you got in your stomach when his lips touched yours felt heavenly.

Jack, who was a little taken aback by the kiss, immediately kissed you back once he realized what was happening. One of his hands found its way to your face and the other at your hip.

You wish you could live in this moment forever, and you genuinely believed you could, that is until you heard cheering coming from behind you. You both pulled apart to see Quinn, Luke, Cole, Trevor & Nico all cheering from the patio.

“THEY FINALLY DID IT!!!” Trevor shouted as he jumped up and down.

“Hurt her again, Hughes & you’re gonna regret it” Nico said before making his way back inside the house. You looked back to Jack to see him gently caressing the back of your hand.

“Wouldn’t even think about it” he smiled as he pressed a kiss to your temples, holding you closer than ever before.

#✎ natalie writes #jack hughes #jack hughes fluff #jack hughes angst #jack hughes imagine #jack hughes fanfiction #jack hughes x you #jack hughes x y/n #jack hughes x reader

327 notes · View notes

theidiotwhowritesthings · 9 months

Text

TAKE CARE OF YOU [8A]

Sugar Daddy!Joel Miller x Female!Reader

Overall Warnings: slow burn, angst/comfort, power imbalance, age gap, possessive tendencies, eventual smut, #daddyissues, independent reader learns to let go and relax, emotionally constipated Joel Miller learns to be vulnerable; (more specific warnings to be added to individual chapters if necessary)

Chapter Word Count: 12,502

Summary: You spent your entire adult life supporting yourself and barely getting by. It’s why a life of ease offered to you by a mysterious stranger sounded so foreign and unbelievable. Joel Miller, dressed in flannels that had seen better days, didn’t look like the kind who could promise you the world on a plate, but he seemed desperate to help out. All he asks is that you let him take care of you. That wouldn’t be so hard. Would it?

[a/n: part one of two! hope you enjoy, if you do let me know your fav part 😘]

Chapter Specific Warning: mentions of attempted sexual assault (not reader), mild violence, mentions of past significant violence, gambling

08: I KNOW HOW TO HANDLE TROUBLE

"the right person for you will be protective of your heart like it's second nature to them." -bliss

The Wynn resort in Las Vegas was a curved bronze hotel right on the strip. The hot Nevada sun seemed to make the building glow, and it only got prettier once you stepped inside. The entire space had glassy, marble floors decorated with splashes of color. Gardens sat inside with trees wrapped in lights and figures of flowers stood out. The atrium itself had spheres of flowers hanging from the trees and you found yourself in awe of the space. Joel had been right. You really liked this place.

“Sugar.” You turned at Joel’s voice, tearing your eyes away from the view, and when you spotted Joel he stood a few feet away with his phone lifted and aimed in your direction. An amused grin flickered across your features as he hummed at his phone. “Hm, yeah. That’s a keeper.”

“You took a picture of me?” You chuckled.

Joel closed the space so he was beside you. “How could I not? You’re gorgeous.” You felt your cheeks heat at his words. Joel stuck his phone into his pocket before offering you his arm. When you looped yours through his, a familiar stance for the two of you, he began to lead you away. “They’re taking our bags upstairs.” He had already reassured you on the way here that though the two of you were sharing a suite it was one with two separate rooms for sleep arrangements. Just as you told Nima, you found yourself both relieved and disappointed.

Feelings were confusing.

“Hungry?”

“I could eat.” You nodded.

“Good. I know a place.”

Said place ending up being a cafe in the casino resort that served a late brunch. When Joel spoke to the host there was no need to ask for a wait time or place his name down. They gave him the choice of indoor or outdoor then walked you in immediately after he chose the outdoor option. The table they offered the two of you was a cute two person seating arrangement on the covered patio under a fan and in view of the elaborate pool. More gardens surrounded the pool itself in the forms of immense and impressive shrubbery and garden paths. The seating around the pool consisted of red and white chairs separated by curtain cabanas that you couldn’t even begin to imagine the price of.

“Do you come to Vegas often?” You asked after a waitress came by and took your orders.

“No. Just for this conference.” Joel shrugged. “It’s an annual thing.” You asked what the conference was about. In all honesty, you didn’t care too much about the specific lectures or meetings he had coming up, but you’d never pass on the opportunity to listen to him talk. “Mostly meetings between different companies. A way to network and bump elbows. A few lectures from some big names on the trendin’ topics in the contractin’ world.”

You beamed at him with a nod. “Very exciting.” Joel chuckled. “How busy is it gonna keep you?”

“Well tomorrow I’ll be busy for most of the mornin’ and afternoon, but I’m free in the evenin’. Then Sunday I have one last meetin’ in the mornin’ and I figure we can do somethin’ in the afternoon before headin’ back home on the jet.”

You leaned forward on the table, head resting on your fists, “And today?”

Joel’s lips curled into a smile that brightened all of his features. It was your favorite look on him. Forget the flannel or the expensive suits, it was that damned smile that put butterflies in your belly. You weren’t sure how a devastatingly handsome older man could also look so boyish and adorable while wearing that charming smile, but by God you were obsessed.

“Today?” Joel reached across the table and brushed his rough fingers against the side of your arm. In response, you let your arm fall from where it held up your head and tangled your fingers with his. Joel squeezed your hand. “Today I’m all yours, sugar.”

You liked the sound of that.

The two of you just enjoyed your uninterrupted time together. When your meal was over, Joel rose and helped you up as well. He didn’t hesitate to pull you close, looping your arm through his, and leading you back toward the lobby. “So,” You leaned into him, “Do we have plans for today?”

“We do.” Joel nodded. “Startin’ with an afternoon poolside.”

Your eyebrows raised in excitement. “Pool?” He hummed in confirmation. You smirked, “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were trying to get me in one of those new swim suits you bought me, daddy.” Standing this close to him, you could see the slight flush of red creep up from the collar of his shirt as he cleared his throat. Joel shot you a dry look. “What’s wrong? Are you getting a little hot under the collar?”

Joel cleared his throat, “You’re trouble, sugar.” He leaned in and suddenly pressed his lips to the side of your head. It was such a chaste and quick moment, yet it stopped your heart in your chest. He left his lips close enough to murmur, “Luckily, I know how to handle trouble.”

“I, uh, I…”

“What’s wrong?” Joel pulled back enough so you could see his smug grin, “Are you gettin’ a bit hot?”

You swallowed, involuntarily, and Joel took that as his victory. He chuckled and dragged you toward the elevators. Your suite was near the top floor of the resort, and when Joel pushed the door open for you the first thing that greeted you was the expansive window that made up the entirety of the wall. Your jaw popped open in shock and your feet carried you closer to the window. The room itself was gorgeous with decor of white and gold, you had never stayed in a hotel room that had an actual living room before, but you could only focus on the view of the Nevada mountains out in the distance. When you reached the glass, you peered down the dizzying drop to where you had a view of the pool and the golf course.

“So pretty…” You mumbled in awe. You spun in place to meet Joel’s gaze, “Isn’t this incredible?”

“Yeah,” Joel nodded. His arms were crossed and you could feel his eyes trace you from head to toe and back up. “Some view.” He kept his gaze on you for a beat while walking toward one of the side doors. Joel opened it and peered in then you heard him curse. “Fuck.”

Curiously, you walked around the couch toward him, “What’s wrong? Did they lose our bags?” You stepped beside him to see what it was that had raptured his attention the way it did, and your eyes landed on the singular Queen sized bed in the center of the bedroom. “Oh.”

“Son of a⏤ I am so sorry.” Joel said quickly before you could push out another word. “I’m gonna fix this.” He went further into the room and grasped the phone at the bedside to immediately bring it up to his ear. A beat passed and he was obviously connected to the front desk. “Hello?”

Your eyes drifted back to the bed and you felt your cheeks warm at the thought of sharing the same bed with Joel Miller. Speaking of the man, he was still arguing over the line and from the sounds of it the argument was not going his way. He seemed desperate to fix this problem and you worried that meant he was desperate to avoid sleeping in the same bed as you.

“No, no, I⏤ I understand that. But I⏤” Joel paused, his jaw locked, and then he pinched the bridge of his nose with his eyes closed irritably. “I said I understand that. No, I⏤ Yeah. Thanks anyways.” He hung up the phone and turned back to face you entirely. You shot him a sheepish smile. Joel’s irritation melted into worry and he held his hands up. “I swear, this was not my intention, darlin’. I booked a room with two beds.” Your eyes widened in understanding. Joel was worried you thought he was trying to take advantage. It was a laughable thought that had never even occurred to you⏤ not Joel. Some would call you naive to have such faith in a sugar daddy you hadn’t known for all that long, but it couldn’t be helped. Somehow, you just knew. “The Wynn doesn’t have any other two bed suites available but we can try a different resort or⏤”

“Joel.” You interrupted his nervous rambling and reached out to set your hand on his forearm. “It’s okay. Accidents happen.” Joel’s shoulders seemed to relax. “And as for the, uh, bed situation… I don’t mind.” The words tumbled from your lips slowly, awkwardly even, and Joel just stared. Quickly, you tried to scramble and clarify. “I just mean, it doesn’t bother me to share. We’re both, you know, adults. We can⏤ We can sleep beside one another without issue.” Joel just continued to stare and you were beginning to regret bringing it up at all. You felt silly. In a poor attempt to break the tension, you joked, “I promise I don’t kick in my sleep. I think.”

Joel set his hand on top of yours and squeezed reassuringly. “Of course we can. But, I don’t want you to feel… pressured to just accept this situation.” He spoke firmly leaving no room for argument in his voice. “If even the smallest part of you feels uncomfortable in any way please tell me. We could go to a different resort or, I mean, if you really wanna stick with this place I could get us separate rooms.”

“Really, Joel.” You replied with just as much finality in your voice as he placed in his. “I’m okay with this. It’s not a big deal.” You motioned toward the bed in question. “It’s a big bed.”

Joel let out a small sigh and shook his head. “I’m a… big guy.”

Your eyes couldn’t help but trace Joel’s broad shoulders and tall frame. “As long as you’re comfortable with it too.” Joel held your gaze then gave a nod. A small smile filling his features. “Now, can we get ready for the pool?”

“Yeah. Course.” Joel chuckled and lifted your hand to press his lips against your knuckles.

You had only just gotten used to holding his hand without feeling flustered, and now Joel was pulling out the big guns with these chaste kisses. The smug son of a bitch knew it too based on the smile he wore. Joel handed you your bag and you carried it into the bathroom to change. In your lifetime, you had gotten ready for a pool day God knows how many times. This was one of the first times you felt so nervous though. You loved your body and felt comfortable in your skin, but at the end of the day you were still a human with anxiety. You still couldn’t help that you wanted Joel to look at you and like what he saw.

At the very least you knew he’d like the swim suit itself since he was the one who had been there to buy it for you. Quickly, eager to get to the pool with Joel, you traded your travel clothes for the swim suit and pulled on the matching, thin robe-like cover that he bought with it⏤ leaving it open rather than tying it closed in the front. Then you spent another few minutes checking your appearance in the mirror and adjusting little things like your hair or where the swim suit sat. Finally, when you knew there was nothing left to check, or obsess over, you stepped out of the bathroom.

Joel wasn’t in the bedroom anymore. You set your bag aside and wandered out into the living room following the sound of his voice. He must have gotten changed out in the bedroom while you were in the bathroom. Joel had changed into swim shorts and a white t-shirt. The shorts were dark navy at the top half and a pale yellow on the lower half. You found you couldn’t stop staring because with the way he lounged on the couch, legs spread wide while talking on the phone, you could see his thick thighs. The sight of a man’s thighs should not make you feel so feral, and yet…

“No, the contract needs to be done by then. We can…” Joel’s voice trailed to a stop and your eyes snapped up from his thighs to see he was gawking at you. You bit down on your lower lip to try and mute the wide grin that threatened to fill your features. You raised a questioning eyebrow at him. Joel nodded. “You’re a goddamn vision, sugar.” There was no chance at hiding your grin now at his compliment. Joel jumped suddenly in surprise, eyes widening, as his attention went back to the phone he forgot he had been holding. “No, no. Not you, idiot.” You laughed and Joel’s cheeks burned. “Oh, bite me, Tommy.”

Joel hung up the phone and pointed it in your direction while standing up. “That’s your fault.”

“My fault?” You chuckled. “How’s that?”

“How’s that?” He scoffed, but his smile didn’t falter. Joel closed the space so he could reach out and lightly pinch your chin. “Walkin’ in here lookin’ like a work of art.” He shook his head. “Tommy ain’t ever gonna let me live that down.”

Joel’s eyes drifted down your frame again and you felt the back of your neck grow warm. You cleared your throat and his eyes snapped back to you. You smirked. “What’re you staring at, Joel?”

His hand fell away from your cheek to brush his fingers against the sunflower charm hanging from your neck. Joel hummed, “Just this pretty, little necklace, sugar.” You shook your head, amused. Joel stepped away to grab a simple back book bag that he slung over one shoulder. “Now, come on. Pool time.”

Rather than walk you down to the Wynn Resort’s pool, Joel led you to the neighboring resort’s pool. The Encore was identical to the Wynn from the outside and sat right beside it as its sister resort. As you traveled, Joel kept his fingers intertwined with yours. Every time he flexed his grip, you glanced down at where the two of you were connected. It was beginning to feel like your hand was shaped just to fit in his.

“So how come we don’t just stay at the Wynn?” You asked.

“The Encore is newer, and I think you’ll like the pool better here.” Joel replied. You had no room to question his judgment. So far, he was spot on because the interior of the Wynn was much prettier than the interior of the Encore in your opinion. “Plus, this is an adults only pool so we won’t have to worry about any yellin’ or splashin’.”

The moment the two of you stepped outside, you were greeted by a more modern looking pool with chairs and decor in shades of white and a bold red. Palm trees decorated the area and the floor was painted with the design of curling sun rays surrounding the pool. There was even a second story of chairs and lounges. Honestly, Joel either knew you better than you thought he did or the man was a good guess because this was much nicer than the Wynn’s pool. Joel squeezed your hand and you turned to see him watching you. He raised his eyebrows in question and you laughed again.

“Alright, alright. It’s a nice pool but don’t look so smug about it.” You replied. You glanced over the space, “Do you see any open chairs we can grab?”

“Yeah, I do.” Joel nodded, “Come on.”

Unsurprisingly, the pool was packed with people and Joel pulled you closer to his side so he could set his hand on your back while leading you through the throngs of people. You tried to spot the chairs he spoke of, but after a beat you realized he was leading you to one of the fancy looking cabanas. It was an open room built on the lower floor of the two story piece right by the poolside. A red curtain was hanging and draped open and inside was a couch, flat screen television, and a cabinet with a bottle of champagne sitting in an ice bucket on top. There were even two lounge chairs that could be dragged out into the space directly in front of the cabana where the sun was shining. Your eyes widened, “No way.”

Joel let go of your hand to step into the cabana and set his bag down on the couch. You slowly drifted in behind him and realized the little cabana was even filled with cool air from a large fan overhead. Joel pulled the champagne from the ice and you watched as he cracked it open with ease.

“How much was this, Joel?” You asked.

“Hey,” Joel chided as he turned with two flutes of cold champagne. He handed you one with a shake of his head, “What was the rule we talked about on the way here, sugar?”

During the plane ride to Vegas, Joel told you he didn’t want you asking how much anything cost during the trip. You chuckled and replied teasingly, “Sorry, daddy.” Joel lightly tapped the edge of his flute against yours and you followed his lead in taking a sip. “Mmm. That’s amazing.”

“Only the best for my sugar baby.” Joel replied, making you laugh.

You took another long swig from the flute then motioned to his bag, “Did you grab my sunscreen?” Joel set his flute down to dig through his bag then pulled out the sunscreen you had brought. You had asked him to toss it in with his stuff to keep from having to bring a bag of your own. “Thanks!”

Joel dropped down to sit on the couch. He rested an arm on the back of it with a content smile while staring at you. Biting back any nervous energy that bubbled in your chest, you shrugged out of your thin robe and began to put on the sunscreen. Knowing his gaze was on you, you rubbed it in methodically and tried not to let it be obvious that the butterflies in your belly were threatening to overwhelm you. When you got every spot you could reach with ease, you turned and held the bottle out to Joel, “Can you get my back?”

His eyes widened as if he hadn’t expected you to ask. Joel sat up and threw back the last of his champagne before taking the bottle. He stood up and you turned around. Luckily, not having to face Joel made the action much easier. Joel stood close enough that you could feel his warm breath on your neck and despite the hot weather you felt goosebumps rise on your skin. Joel’s hand settled on your lower back first and he was careful with the application. He rubbed it in your skin, but he did so in a way that made you feel like you were made of glass. You couldn’t even find it in yourself to complain because the more careful he was the slower he worked, and the slower he worked the longer you had his rough hands against your skin.

“There.” Joel hummed. His voice sounded more hoarse than it did when he started. “All protected, sugar.”

You glanced over your shoulder to meet his gaze, “Thanks, daddy.” You meant to say the words playfully, but instead they fell out in a soft near whisper. There was a beat of silence between the two of you and you forced yourself to shake out of the trance Joel had you in. “Um. Can you help me drag the lounge chairs out into the sun?”

Joel cleared his throat and nodded, “I can do you one better.”

He grabbed the back of his shirt’s collar to pull out of his shirt and your eyes involuntarily raked down his body. Joel was built strong. From his broad shoulders to the bit of belly he had, it all screamed strength and sturdiness. He tossed his shirt aside then grasped your hand to lead you out, but you dug your heels in to stop him. Joel shot you a curious look.

“You didn’t put on any sunscreen.” You said.

Joel furrowed his brow, “I don’t need sunscreen.”

“You don’t need sunscreen?”

“I’m a big, strong man.” Joel replied teasingly before trying to pull you out of the cabana again.

You tugged him back. “Hey, big strong man, in a fight against the sun you’re gonna lose.” Joel groaned and rolled his eyes in good nature but he allowed you to pull him all the way back in. You made him hold your flute so you could grab the bottle of sunscreen. Quickly, before you lost your nerve, you squirted a glob of sunscreen in your hand and began to rub it into Joel’s skin. He squirmed under your touch and you shot him a mocking glare, “Hey, stay still.”

“Bossy.” Joel snorted.

“Do you like it better when I’m bossy or bratty?” You asked with a cheeky grin. Joel’s lips pulled up into a smile, but he didn’t offer an answer. You used the last bit of sunscreen on your hands to rub onto his features and you finished with your hands on the side of his face. You squished his cheeks together. “There. All protected.”

Joel suddenly turned his face and playfully nipped at your hand with his teeth. You gasped in surprise and he laughed. “Now that we’re safe from the sun, let’s go.” He tangled his fingers with yours and offered you back the flute of champagne you hadn’t finished yet. With a sip, you let him drag you out into the sun. He walked you up to the poolside and stopped at the edge. In the shallow parts of the pool, sitting in the water, were circular cushioned beds with an umbrella situated in the middle of each one. By each beside was a circular stand where drinks could be placed to rest. You stared at, gaping probably, and Joel leaned in toward your ear. “That’s ours too.”

“Seriously?” You asked in surprise. Joel nodded. The urge to ask how much it cost came to mind, but you bit back the words and just grinned instead. Joel walked down the few steps into the shallow water and held your hand to aid you in. “You know,” The cold water came up just past your ankles and you waded with Joel to the daybed reserved for the two of you, “I could get used to this ‘having money’ thing.”

Joel chuckled and dropped down on the bed. He lounged on his back, hands folded behind his head, and stared at you as you settled in beside him. You chose to lay on your belly so you could continue to sip on your champagne.

“Thank you. For all of this.” You said sincerely. Briefly, you chewed on your lower lip then gave a small shrug, “I haven’t had a pool day in nearly a year let alone go on an actual vacation.”

Joel shook his head, “Thank you for comin’ with me, darlin’. You’re doin’ me the favor.”

The two of you just relaxed, letting the heat seep into your skin, and when you were on your last sip of champagne a poolside waitress walked over with a smile to see if the two of you needed any drinks. Joel sat up and ordered two frozen drinks. You chuckled, “You’ve kept a drink in my hand since the moment we landed.” You tilted your head. “If I didn’t know any better I’d say you were trying to get me tipsy, Joel.”

“Me? Never. I’m a gentleman.” Joel shook his head. He smirked and nodded toward you. “Besides, you’ve already felt me up, and I didn’t even need to get you tipsy.”

Your eyes widened and you reached out to give him a light shove, “I was not ‘feeling you up’. I was saving you from a future of being a leathered, sun shriveled old man.”

“If that’s what you gotta tell yourself.” Joel shrugged.

You laughed and Joel began to lay back down. Before he could get comfortable, you pointed to the umbrella, “Wait, can you close the umbrella?” Joel shot you a confused look as if you were crazy for asking. You shrugged. “I just want some sunshine for a little bit.”

“You’re all the sunshine we need right now.” Joel said and reached out to pinch your cheek.

“That is an adorable excuse.” You spoke despite him pinching your cheek, and Joel chuckled before reaching up to close the umbrella. Bright sunlight immediately rained down on the two of you and the direct warmth on your skin made you beam happily. As hot as it was, you probably wouldn’t be able to stand the sunlight for very long, but it felt nice for the time being.

Joel grunted and rolled over onto his belly so he could keep the sun out of his eyes, “What do you say?” You slid a pair of sunglasses on and laid on your back while humming⏤ pretending to think of what answer he might want. Joel propped himself up just enough to rest one of his arms on your other side so he was leaning over you. You sucked in a sharp breath at his close proximity, and he raised an eyebrow at you. “Manners, sugar.”

“Thank you, daddy.” You cooed.

“Good girl.”

You tightened the fluffy, white robe that the Wynn resort left you in the suite’s bathroom then stepped out fresh and clean, “Joel! I’m done with the shower.” The two of you had stayed out at the pool until it closed. Being out in the hot sun the entire afternoon had wiped you out, but Joel told you to get ready for a night out and you found your second wind. Joel wandered into the bedroom, and you groaned happily, “You’re in for a treat because the water pressure was incredible.”

“I would hope so.” Joel chuckled then his eyes narrowed skeptically. “Do you have bad water pressure in your apartment?”

“Uh…” You paused in thought. You had a feeling that if you confirmed that information then Joel would try to buy you a new apartment or something equally as wild. “...no?” Joel shot you a skeptical glance that made it clear he didn’t believe you. He disappeared into the bathroom, and you quickly called out. “Oh, wait! Pick a color, Joel!”

Without hesitation, Joel replied through the door, “Red!”

Excitedly, you shimmed off the bed to hurry over and dig out the red cocktail dress Joel had bought you for Vegas. Of the newest additions to your wardrobe, the red dress you had picked out was one of your favorites. You wondered if he remembered that. While Joel showered, you pulled out the ironing board to smooth out any of the wrinkles your dress had gotten during transit. It didn’t take much and you were about to put away the iron when you paused. Joel’s suitcase sat near yours in the room. You bit down on your lower lip for a beat before walking over to find a shirt for him.

You picked out a black button up shirt to match the black blazer he had already hung up. The ‘black out’ look on him just seemed like it would be clean and handsome. Not that you could picture many looks not looking incredible on him. The bathroom door opened and Joel stepped out in just a towel. The back of your neck warmed and you tried not to let your eyes linger. Obviously you had seen him shirtless poolside, but this felt more intimate.

“Why don’t you get changed in the bathroom and I can get ready out here⏤” Joel paused and pointed to the ironing board. You finished the last few passes of the iron over his shirt. “Is that mine?”

“Well, it’s not mine.” You replied and picked up his shirt to shake it a bit. You held it out to him with a broad smile.

Joel took the shirt from you and you were acutely aware of his lingering touch on your hand. “This my color for the night, sugar? Black?” You nodded with a wide grin. Joel gave you a nod of confirmation and you scooped up your dress to head to the bathroom. “Alright. Black and red it is.”

You glanced over your shoulder to allow yourself one last look of Joel and seeing the bare expanse of his back made your heart flutter in your chest. The image of it lingered in your mind even after you closed the door. You made the effort to commit it to memory.

It didn’t take you too long to get ready and it was in part due to how eager you were. Joel had been tight lipped the entire afternoon about the plans for the evening. No matter how much you pleaded or begged he wouldn’t even give you a hint. All you knew was that he had an entire night planned for the two of you. Not even accounting for the amount of money involved in all of this, the fact that Joel had the thought to plan a night for you was heartwarming. It was a reminder that your bar was set so low due to your last boyfriend. You had to plan nearly every single trip or date night, and you had convinced yourself you enjoyed it. Tricked yourself into thinking you preferred it that way instead of admitting that it was a problem.

You rubbed your hands down the front of your red dress⏤ smoothing it out and giving you something to do with your nervous energy. You stepped out of the bathroom, expecting Joel to be sitting in the living room waiting for you or on his phone, but your feet faltered at the sight of him sitting on the edge of the bed. Joel ran a hand over his jawline, fingers dragging through his scruff. He stood up and the two of you spent a quiet moment just staring at one another. Just as you knew it would, the black shirt and black suit combo was deadly on Joel. This time you beat Joel to the punch.

“Hot damn, Joel.” You grinned. He cleared his throat and the look on his face could only be described as flustered. Eager to flip the table on him and do what he always did to you, you walked to him and reached out to smooth his lapel, feeling his chest under it, “This is a real good look on you, daddy.”

The sound that left him, almost a choking noise at the back of his throat, made you feel smug. He shook his head slowly and didn’t let his eyes leave you for even a second. “Oh, sugar,” Joel hummed, “I don’t hold a flame to you. I just don’t get it.”

“Don’t get what?” You asked.

“How every time I look at you, you somehow get even more breathtakin’.” Joel replied.

Heat rose in your cheeks and crawled up the back of your neck. Damn it all. Every time you think you had the tables flipped he managed to get the upper hand again. You let out a laugh and tried to hide how flustered you felt, “No fair.” Joel smirked as if he knew exactly what you were getting at. You gave his chest a slight push, but he caught your hands to hold them there. You shook your head, “Can you let me have the upper hand just one time?”

Joel breathed out a small laugh, and he opened his mouth to reply. However, he stopped himself and closed his mouth with an amused smile. You tilted your head curiously, but Joel just slipped his hand through yours. “Ready to go?”

“Do I get to know where we’re going now?”

“You’ll find out as soon as we get there.”

“Very funny.”

The same car that drove you from the airport to the Wynn also picked you up. When it came to the Vegas strip, there were some resorts that were within walking distance from where you were located, but Joel’s first plan of the night was not. You stared out the window marveling at the tall buildings covered in gigantic screens showcasing an ad or show. Even the sidewalks had plenty of things to watch. Tourists, showgirls, people performing, and some even dressed up in character suits. There was one rough looking Mickey Mouse the car passed that gave you a look into what the famous mouse’s life would look like if he got deep in the world of hard drugs.

“Oh,” You tore your eyes away from the window to look at Joel who sat beside you in the back of the car with his arm resting on the seat behind you, “Is that where they do that big fountain show?”

Joel nodded, “Bellagio. Yeah. We can stop and watch it later tonight. They do a show every thirty minutes I think.”

The car turned off the strip to a resort that sat just off it by a bit. The Aria. It looked as immense and fancy as any of the other resorts and was even shaped similarly to the Wynn and the Encore. Joel let his hand brush against the back of your neck and you knew he wanted you to stay in place while he climbed out. Seconds later, your door opened and Joel held out a hand to help you climb out.

“What’s so special about the Aria?” You asked.

Joel laced his fingers through yours and pulled you toward the resort doors. The lobby was a large open space with pillars, and your eyes landed on a wave of hand folded origami flowers in a gradient of red, pink, and orange hanging from the glass ceiling. You paused, jaw slightly open as you admired the sight, and Joel just waited patiently. Finally, you tore your eyes away from the origami flowers to look at him.

“We have dinner reservations here.” Joel answered.

You raised an eyebrow at him with a smirk, “We came all the way here just for dinner?”

Joel didn’t give you a reply, and you noticed he looked excited. You squeezed his hand and let him lead you deeper into the resort. In order to get where you were going, the two of you had to walk through the casino and it was fun to see the flashing lights and general buzz of excitement. The air smelled faintly of cigarette smoke, and there were different degrees of yelling and cheering. You were so caught up in your surroundings that you hadn’t noticed Joel and you reached your destination until he came to a stop.

You glanced at Joel who continued to beam at you, and then looked forward to where a simple arch sat with the word ‘CATCH’ written in bright, glowing letters above the top. It was what laid just beyond the arch that had your breath catch in your throat. The arch was the entrance to a tunnel and even from where you stood you could see the entire tunnel was made up of different flowers and glowing lights.

Joel leaned over, his lips close enough to your ear that you could feel his breath fan against your skin, “It didn’t feel right not bein’ able to get you a bouquet of flowers before dinner so I thought I’d just bring you to ‘em.”

You felt a visceral reaction to Joel’s words. Your throat tightened, and a part of you wanted to cry. It took every ounce of your self control to not actually let any tears fall. It was just so sweet and you felt so seen and cared for. “Joel.” You mumbled and turned your head to look at him. He was still lingering close to where he had whispered in your ear which left you dangerously close to his face. You swallowed, “Joel, this is…”

His eyes darted across your features, lingering at your eyes and lips, “Wanna take a closer look, sugar?”

Your face broke out into a face splitting grin and you nodded. Joel hesitated in place, taking in a slow breath, before pulling away so he could drag you through the arch. He let his own steps slow while you continued forward a bit. Your hand fell out of his, but your eyes were taking in the hanging flowers overhead and the colorful walls on either side of you. The air was filled with a sweet, floral scent and a soft, golden glow surrounded the space from the lights buried between the flowers. It took half a beat before you realized Joel wasn’t by your side, and you quickly turned in place to look for him. He stood a few feet back, hands in his pocket, just staring with a small smile on his face.

“What?” You asked with a laugh.

“Nothing.” Joel closed the space.

As soon as he was close enough, you looped your arm through his. The two of you took a few more steps down the wood panel path that led through the tunnel and a portion off to the side curved inward with a long half circle bench nestled against the wall and a wall of pink, orange, and red roses covering that indent of the wall.

“Oh!” You pulled him toward the bench and dropped down there with him beside you. “Can we take a picture?” You pulled your phone out. “Please?”

“I can take your picture for you.” Joel replied.

You shook your head and held onto his arm. “I want you to be in it too.”

Joel looked skeptical for only a moment. He never seemed the selfie kind to you, but he leaned in regardless. You lifted your phone to take a few snaps. Joel had one arm around your shoulders during most of the pictures, but near the end he used his other hand to cup the side of your face to pull him closer. Joel turned and pressed his lips to your temple and you managed to get a few snaps of that as well. Your chest was filled with so much warmth and happiness that you didn’t have the room to feel flustered.

You stood up with Joel and he tugged you to the end of the tunnel where a maitre’d stood waiting. The first part of the restaurant you could see was a large bar surrounded by people. Joel had the two of you pause by the front desk.

“Welcome Miller party.” The maitre’d asked. Joel nodded. “Your table is being cleaned off and prepared now. If you’d like to wait by the bar, your waitress will fetch you soon.”

“Thanks.” Joel dug through his coat pocket and you saw him pull out a few folded bills that he slipped into the other man’s hand. “And thank you for clearin’ the tunnel.”

“Of course, sir.”

It dawned on you then, and you glanced back to see the tunnel was now filled with small parties and couples. “Wait, did you pay him to let us be the only ones?”

Joel shrugged and rather than answer he stepped up to the bar with you by his side and ordered himself a glass of whiskey and your typical drink of choice. He kept one hand on the small of your back while you leaned against the bar. When the drinks came, Joel lifted his glass just high enough to allow you to tap yours against his. He winked as the glasses made contact, “Cheers, sugar.”

You moved to take a sip and your drink had only barely touched your tongue when a waitress came over calling out for Joel. He nodded for you to follow first so he could linger a step behind you with his hand on your waist. The table you were led to was a circular booth and it was one of the few tables decorated in excess. The booth looked like it was nestled inside a large bird cage with a broad open door, and woven between the metal bars were vines and string lights. You slid into the booth, setting your glass on the table to avoid spilling it, and Joel slid in after you.

“Joel, this place is…” You let out a breath, unable to grasp a word immediately, “...amazing. Thank you.”

“Stop thankin’ me for somethin’ I like doin’.” Joel chuckled. He draped his arm on the top of the booth behind you and let his fingers brush lightly against your shoulder.

“You like spending absorbent amounts of money on me?” You teased.

Joel leaned over a bit and lowered his voice, sincerity in his voice, “I like takin’ care of you.” It should probably concern how easily Joel was able to make your temperature rise. Literally all it took was a look, the sound of his voice, or just being in near proximity. He straightened back in his seat. “Now,” Joel picked up his glass and took a quick sip, “Is there anythin’ you always wanted to do while in Vegas?”

You hummed in thought. The fountains had already been mentioned. That seemed like a staple Vegas activity. “I wanna see a show.”

“Already on the agenda.”

“Wait, really?” Your eyes widened. “What show??” Joel just stared at you with a smug smile. You rolled your eyes. “Yeah, yeah. It’s a surprise.” You took a sip of your own drink. “I want to gamble.”

Joel chuckled, “Gamble?” You nodded. “Gamble how? Slots or a table game?”

“I want to play the one where you throw dice.”

“Craps.”

“Yeah, that!” You nodded. “Everybody does that while they’re in Vegas, right?”

“Fair enough.” Joel said. “Anythin’ else?”

Another thought came to mind, but it felt kind of silly. “There was this one other thing…”

“Name it, sugar.”

You scrunched your nose. “Can we go on the gondolas? I know it’s probably dumb since it’s not even a real river and it’s just inside one of those big resorts, but I don’t know… It looked kind of fun.”

Joel let out a breathy laugh before dropping his hand so instead of soft brushes he was able to squeeze your shoulder, “We can absolutely ride the gondolas.”

You bounced in your seat, excited, as Joel shook his head in amusement. The waitress came back to discuss the specials of the night. After a quick discussion, Joel ordered for the both of you. It was something you learned early on with the man. He enjoyed leading. Whether it be the obvious thing like paying for everything or having you wait in the car so he could open the door for you or ordering your food and drink for you. Joel just liked being in charge of the relationship and you had no qualms with that. Especially considering how careful and caring he was in the action. He paid attention to you, the things you did or the words you said, in order to take charge accordingly. As sad and pathetic as it was, Joel remembered more about you and your preferences than your ex-boyfriend did at the end of your relationship with him.

Content and at ease, you settled in your seat and let out a soft sigh.

The night went by too quickly for your liking. Dinner, just like everything with Joel, was easy. You had never met someone who made you feel so comfortable, so seen, so fast. And after he treated you to one of the best meals you ever had, the two of you traveled to the MGM resort for the show which turned out to be a show by the name of ‘KA’. Joel said he chose it off the recommendation of one of the business men he’d be working with in the morning, and it had been a solid choice. The show went beyond your expectations and you had already set them pretty high considering it was Cirque du Soleil and in Vegas. Then, rather than take the car, the two of you walked down the strip with your arm wrapped through his. The walk consisted of two stops, one at the fountains to watch the show, and the other at the Venetian resort to ride in the gondolas.

“Joel, this has literally been the greatest night ever.” You gushed while squeezing his arm. The two of you had walked from the Venetian back to the Wynn. His black suit jacket hung on your shoulders after he had given it to you during the gondola ride.

Joel chuckled, “Literally?”

“Yes.” You said. “I am being literal, thank you.”

“Well, sugar, you know me.” Joel lifted one of your hands to press his lips to the back casually. “Always happy to provide.”

He continued to lead you into the resort without even realizing how earth shattering his presence was to you. Joel kept your arm wrapped through his with his hand intertwined with yours and held to his chest. It was such an intimate gesture that he did so casually⏤ as if it were second nature to him. The urge to stop in your tracks and pull him into a kiss was nearly overwhelming. In fact, if you had maybe even one more drink tonight it would’ve been enough liquid courage to convince you. However, anxiety still plagued your mind. Logic tried to reign in your feelings and remind you of all the reasons this was a bad idea. Even if you ignored the nearly two decade large age gap between the both of you, there were still enough reasons for your brain to try and stop you.

If you could quiet your logical and turbulent mind for just a moment, just long enough to allow your heart to act, then maybe these fears and anxieties wouldn’t matter.

The two of you were walking through the casino to get to the elevators that would take you upstairs. You continued to stare while focusing on the circles his thumb was tracing on the back of your hand. God, you wanted this man. If he could make you feel so happy, so good about yourself, in public with innocent touches and glances, you wondered how incredible he could make you feel behind closed doors. You craved his touch, his rough hands grasping at all of you, and you were desperate enough to trade your soul just to feel his hot mouth exploring your skin.

Joel’s eyes suddenly met yours and you sucked in a sharp breath of surprise. Heat flooded your cheeks in embarrassment as if he could hear your sinful thoughts about him. Joel gave you a quick wink and nodded, “One last stop.”

He tugged you off the path that carved through the casino and onto the actual casino floor. The slot machines around you were a sea of colors, flashing lights, and whistling tunes. Servers drifted about bringing drinks to those sitting at the machines, but Joel led you past all of them. The two of you approached the section that had the table games, and you spotted the one with the dice.

“Oh!” You chirped in recognition. “We’re gonna play?”

“You said you wanted to.” Joel countered. The table wasn’t very crowded right now. Save for the casino employees, there was two other people standing around the table playing. You felt a sense of anxiety creep up your spine. You were vaguely aware that the rules for these table games were very strict and there were also unspoken rules of conduct. “Here.” Joel reached toward you and stuck his hand in the inner pocket of his jacket which hung off your shoulders. He fished out a few hundreds that you couldn’t help but stare at. Joel pushed two hundred dollars in your hand. “Just like me, sugar.”

He placed the bills on the table top with his ID card and you hurried to copy him. Between dice rolls, the man running the table pulled your bills toward him and began to prep your chips. You leaned over and whispered, “Joel, I have no idea how to play this.”

“It’s easy.” He reassured you. You glanced at the very confusing green felt covered in different words and numbers then back to him skeptically. Joel chuckled and tapped under your chin with his hand. “I promise.”

Joel began to point out different portions of the table, and between the warm honey tone of his words and the multiple drinks you had throughout the night, you were not following whatsoever. You stared at him, nodding every few seconds, while admiring the lines of his face. People wrote poems and sung praises about blue and green eyes, but you were convinced it was because those people were never blessed with the opportunity to gaze into Joel Miller’s eyes. There was a warmth in the dark color of his irises that felt like coming home after a long day in the cold. Your eyes flickered to a small bare spot in his scruffy jawline that vaguely resembled a heart and you resisted the urge to lean forward and place a kiss right there. Why else would the otherwise perfect man in front of you have that space in his beard if not for your lips?

“You’re not hearin’ a damn thing I’m sayin’, are you?” Joel teased.

You blinked in surprise and watched as his lips stretched into a bright smile, “Uh, I’m listening.”

“Right. What did I just say about the ‘Come bet’?”

“That…it’s… better than a ‘Leave bet’?” You joked.

Joel barked out a laugh and the sound made your stomach flip. He leaned forward and pressed his lips to your forehead. You were savoring the feel of his lips on your skin, when he turned you back to the table where a stack of chips were waiting for you. He slid two green chips into the box labeled ‘Pass Line’. You quickly mimicked his actions. Joel scooped up the dice, nodding at the man running the table, and then set them in your hands. “You’re the shooter, sugar.”

“Me?” Your eyes widened in worry.

“7 or 11.” Joel winked.

You took half a second to stand in shock at how your life had brought you to this point right here, and then you dove right in. You tossed the red dice and they bounced across the table before landing on a four and a three. The other two people at the table clapped their hands and Joel gave your elbow a squeeze.

The table slowly began to fill up, and you were a firm believer in the concept of ‘beginner’s luck’. You still only had a vague understanding of the game, but every time it was your time to be the shooter you were on a roll. It was exciting to have strangers cheering you on as well and as time passed you began to get more confident with how you tossed the chips around. Again, your knowledge on the actual rules were scarce, but you were pushing around higher number chips than Joel was. As the man running the table began to prep chips for a new player who settled in beside you, you turned to smirk at Joel.

“I’m doing pretty good.” You motioned to your decent stack of chips.

“Better than me.” Joel smirked.

Your pile was currently larger than Joel’s, but he seemed more concerned in keeping an eye on you than winning back his money. Teasingly, you leaned forward to let your lips linger by his ear, “If I win big, I promise to take care of you, baby.”

Joel laughed loudly and shook his head, “Just roll your dice.” You bounced in place just a bit before throwing the dice across the table. It landed on a total of seven which was not what you needed at the moment and it ended your roll. You groaned with the rest of the table, and Joel leaned into you this time. “Looks like I don’t need to worry none. Disappointed?”

“Nah.” You shook your head and locked your eyes with his. “I like being your sugar.”

“Good.” Joel’s dark eyes lingered on yours before dropping to your lips and bouncing back up. It was enough to make you release a small gasp, and he must have heard the sound because he smirked.

Your elbow suddenly brushed against something behind you, and it broke the spell. Joel leaned back and it was only then you realized how close the two of you had drifted toward one another. You cleared your throat and glanced at the man on your other side, assuming you had bumped into him while getting lost in the tempting vortex that was Joel, “I’m so sorry about that.”

“No, no. No worries, sweetheart.” The man replied. He was probably a few years older than you, if you garnered a guess, and he was decent looking but certainly not anything to write home about. Absolutely plain standing beside someone like Joel. He lifted his hand to your face, making you flinch, and opened his fist to reveal the dice, “Blow me?”

“What?” You blurted in shock.

“Watch it.” Joel snarled from behind you. His chest pressed against your side, and when you glanced over you saw the warmth in his eyes had turned dangerous. Not a comforting flame in the fireplace after a long day, but a raging wildfire licking at the edge of the forest⏤ threatening to destroy. Joel glared at the man and if looks could kill then he’d be struck down by now.

“I’m just talking about the dice.” The guy chuckled. He winked at you, and you blanched in disgust. “Relax.”

The rest of the table, including a few of his friends on the other side of him, began to goad him into rolling the dice. Joel was still stiff, and you set a hand on his forearm in hopes to calm him. Joel’s eyes snapped to yours and you watched the anger simmer. You gave him a reassuring smile. One stupid jerk wasn’t going to ruin the night for you. Joel nodded once and began to move around you. At first, you thought he was going to place himself in between you and the guy, but instead he settled behind you. Joel pressed his chest against your back, setting a hand on your abdomen to pull you closer, and then let his hands fall to the tables’ sides⏤ successfully blocking you in.

You couldn’t even focus on if Joel was still upset because every single ounce of your mind was redirected to keeping your body from spontaneously combusting. His stance around you was dizzying. Protective. Intimate. Possessive. Joel was stamping a claim on you, a warning to the man who accosted you, and you found it extremely attractive. Months ago, you would have firmly stated that you were a strong, independent woman who didn’t want nor need a man that took control or showed any signs of being overprotective. However, you would commit atrocities if it meant hearing Joel call you his.

Joel leaned his head down on your shoulder just enough to whisper, “You alright, sugar?”

Other than possibly going into a heart arrhythmia from his proximity, you were just fine, “Yeah. I’m okay, Joel. Don’t worry.” You felt him nod and then he leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to the side of your neck. You audibly gasped, “Oh God.”

“What was that?” Joel asked.

“Nothing.” You blurted. His head was still hovering over your shoulder and you stayed stock still to avoid accidentally brushing any part of you against him. You heard Joel chuckle lightly before he straightened his posture.

With Joel nearly wrapped around your body, it was easy to fall back into ease as the game went on. You weren’t really winning much more money, but you also weren’t significantly losing either. Just bouncing back and forth enough to maintain the same amount of chips. Between that and the feel of Joel’s breaths on your neck, you were ready to call it a night.

You turned your head to speak to him and realized how close he still stood then. Your nose was only an inch or so away from brushing against his jawline. You swallowed the lump in your throat and found the courage to not pull away. “Can we call it a night? Go back to the room?”

Joel turned his head and the slow way his jawline ended up rubbing against the top of your nose softly seemed deliberate. He gave you a small smile and nodded. “Course.” Joel held his position for a beat more before pushing away from you so he could speak to the man running the table. “We’re out.”

You took in a shuddering breath as Joel got the chips converted to the highest amount possible so it’d be easier to carry. Your anxiety had a bad habit of making you overthink and underplay everything against your favor, but even for you it was difficult to ignore Joel’s behavior tonight. He seemed genuinely interested. Nima had encouraged you to chase what made you happy, and Joel made you happy. There was no doubt there. Anticipation began to build in your chest as you hyped yourself up to make a move tonight. You took a chance and said yes to being his sugar baby in the first place.

You just needed to take a chance again.

Joel turned back to you and he slipped a few black chips into his coat’s inner pocket before wrapping his arm around your shoulders to tug you into his side. You mimicked his action, holding yourself close to him, and the two of you only got a few steps away before the same obnoxious voice from earlier wolf whistled behind you.

“Damn, look at that ass.” The guy from earlier stumbled a step closer as his friends behind him tried to reel him back desperately. “How much do you charge a night? I’ll pay double whatever the old man is paying you.”

You stiffened at the words. They hit a little too close to home. You usually were able to easily let the drunk, stupid words of some obnoxious asshole roll off your back. Unknowingly though, the man had dug a knife into an already sore subject in your mind. In your spiraling panic, you didn’t realize the man was reaching for you until Joel was suddenly gone from your side.

Without a word, Joel slammed his fist into the man’s face then grabbed him by the lapels of his sport coat before he could collapse. The man’s friends were trying to stop the attack while calling out apologies, but their attempts were fruitless. Joel lifted the man up off the ground enough to throw him over the edge of the craps table, making chips fly across the green felt as others around the table screamed in alarm, and Joel punched the man twice more before security swarmed the scene.

“Joel!” You cried out and tried to reach him, but a man in a dark suit and badge held you back.

They separated the fight easily and when Joel was pulled back away from the now groaning guy who was still laid up on the craps table, you saw real rage burning in Joel’s dark eyes. You had never seen his features twisted in anger and loathing before. Security dragged the guy off the table and took him and his friends toward the front of the resort while ushering for you and Joel to follow them in the opposite direction. Joel’s eyes snapped to meet yours and you watched as his anger melted into worry and concern. He shoved a security guard out of his way to reach you and one hand shot up to rest protectively on the back of your neck as his eyes scanned your face.

“Hey, are you alright?” Joel asked nervously. Unable to find words, you gave him a meek nod and his shoulders sagged in relief. The lead security guard cleared his throat and Joel kept his hands on you while following after the man. When the small grouping of people reached the edge of the casino floor, Joel spoke up. “That piece of shit better be out on his ass.”

“He has been forcibly removed from our premises and I do apologize for the duress.” The lead security, his badge read ‘T. Gordon’, turned to you with a slight nod. “Are you okay, miss?”

“Oh, uh, I’m fine.” You replied.

“Good.” Gordon focused back on Joel. “As regrettable as this scenario was, fighting is strictly prohibited⏤”

“If you kept assholes like him from gettin’ so wasted then maybe I wouldn’t have had to start nothin’.” Joel snapped. “He was gonna try and touch her.”

“Right, and because of that we will not be restricting your access to the resort.” Gordon said. “That being said, I will have to limit your access to the casino floor. The Wynn has a strict policy. That gentleman will never be welcome on our property again, and you will be suspended for the next three months.”

“Fine. Can we go?”

Gordon motioned for the two of you to wait while he fetched some paperwork for Joel to sign. Your eyes darted down to Joel’s dominant hand, the one not wrapped around your waist, and it was still balled into a tight fist. There was a redness to the knuckles that made you gasp.

“What’s wrong?” Joel’s attention snapped to you in alarm.

You reached for his hand and cradled it in yours, studying the gash and early bruising, “You’re bleeding, Joel.”

“It’s not a big deal.” He tried to pull his hand away, but you held on tighter and he sighed. “Really. Doesn’t even hurt.”

Your thumb brushed the edge of the discoloration and his nose twitched with a slight wince. You shot him a light glare, “Liar.” Joel’s own lips curled into a small smile and you shook your head. “What? Don’t smile at me. I’m worried about your hand.”

“I know.” Joel replied softly. He turned his gaze away from you and his next words fell out in a slight whisper. “It’s cute.”

Gordon returned a second later and you were forced to release his hand so he could sign the paperwork stating he understood his punishment. You were just happy that the police didn’t need to be involved. Joel began to lead you toward the elevators, which weren’t far from where you stood now. It didn’t take long to get to the room, and the moment you stepped through the threshold you pushed him toward the couch to sit. Quickly, you shrugged out of his jacket and fetched a rag to run under cold water.

Joel was slumped in his seat with his head leaning back and his arm draped over to cover his eyes. You sat down beside him, on his left and close enough that your thigh pressed against the side of his, then carefully pulled his arm away from his face so you could take his hand in yours. Joel blinked his eyes open at you while you carefully began to dab at the gash on his knuckles.

“I’m so sorry.” Joel sighed.

Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “Why are you apologizing?”

“I lost my temper.” He shifted so rather than slumped back he was sitting upright. Joel’s fingers wrapped around the hand holding his up while your other continued to clean his injury. “I never wanted you to see me like that.”

“Joel…”

“When I’m around you,” Joel paused and took in a slow breath, “I get to be one of the best versions of myself. Carefree. Happy. That’s what I want you to see. Not angry or grumpy or stressed⏤ Just… I don’t want…”

It seemed he couldn’t find the end of his thoughts. You paused in cleaning his wound to just squeeze his hand in reassurance. “I don’t want just the best of you, Joel. I want to know all of you. Good and bad.” Joel’s gaze softened and the way he stared at you, with blatant adoration even the worst of your anxiety couldn’t deny, made your chest fill with warmth. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“How’d I get so lucky to find you, sugar?” Joel asked quietly.

“Easy.” You offered him a smile and shrug, “You left your wallet at home, daddy.”

Joel laughed and the sound of it felt victorious. You liked being able to cheer him up. A knock at the door made you rise from the couch. Joel tried to stop you so he could go, but you brushed away his hand with a chuckle. At the door, a waiter stood holding a bucket filled with ice and a bottle of wine. You took it from him questioningly and walked back into the living space.

“What is it?”

You read the card tied to the side, “‘Please accept this wine as an apology for tonight’s disturbance.’” Your eyes widened and you stared at Joel in shock. “Seriously? You punch a guy and the hotel apologizes to you?” Joel motioned for you to get closer and you walked over to settle back in the seat you had been in. Joel pulled the bottle from the bucket to read it. “You rich people, I swear.”

“Wow. This is a pricey bottle.” Joel hummed. “I don’t know a lot of wines, but Sarah likes this one. I buy it for her every year for her birthday.”

You scooped up some of the ice to set in the rag, a smile on your features. You always loved hearing details of Joel’s home life. It wasn’t like he was hiding anything from you, he spoke freely about his daughters, but every little detail you learned solidified the image of the doting and loving father Joel truly was. You’d be lying if you said it wasn’t an extremely attractive trait of his.

With your makeshift ice pack, you shifted in place so you could settle it on his knuckles. Joel hissed at the cold and set the bottle down. His hand was resting in your lap so neither of you had to hold it up and his close proximity was making your heart race.

“You know,” You chuckled, “Nobody’s ever punched someone to defend my honor, like that before. Is it wrong that I kind of liked it?”

“Not wrong.” Joel shook his head. “But you’ve really never had to deal with an asshole like that before?”

You scoffed with a laugh. “I’ve dealt with assholes like him my whole life. I’m a breathing woman who lives in LA. I can’t walk down the street without getting catcalled or yelled at.”

Joel’s brows furrowed in confusion, “You were datin’ someone before me though, right?” You nodded in confirmation. “He never…?”

“Nathan wasn’t big on violence of any kind.” You shook your head. A memory tumbled out from your lips before you could even stop it. “I got groped once at a bar we went to. Some guy grabbed my chest and Nate scolded him and then the two of them started talking about some baseball game.”

“You’re shittin’ me.”

“Nope.”

Joel muttered under his breath a string of curses. His hand slid to rest on your mid thigh and he gave it a comforting squeeze. “I know technically the answer should be non-violence, so I’m probably the bad guy for sayin’ this, but I would’ve ripped that guy’s head off.” Based on what you saw this evening, you believed him, and still you only found comfort in it. “The world’s a goddamn mess and that kid you dated was a coward for not standin’ up for you. That’s the least a man could do for a woman he loves.” You felt your heart skip a beat at his insinuation. Joel didn’t love you. It was way too soon for him to feel any kind of way close to that, but to hear you were in the group of people he cared enough about to protect still made you feel some kind of way yourself. “Not that women can’t protect themselves.” Joel was near ranting now. “I made sure Sarah and Ellie could hold their own. Basic self defense, teachin’ ‘em how to handle a weapon, a kickboxin’ class here or there. But still… The thought that you got assaulted and your ex-boyfriend just thought to be chummy with the guy pisses me the fuck off.”

There was an edge to his voice, and you could see the haunted look of a past memory lingering in his eyes. You melted into the couch, closer to him, and Joel squeezed your thigh once more. “I’m okay, Joel. Everything is fine, and I’m safe. We’re safe.” You lifted the ice pack just enough to give his skin a break from all the cold. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m alright. Just…” Joel shook his head. “Bad memory.”

“Want to talk about it?”

Joel hesitated for a moment before sighing, “It was a long time ago. I took the girls campin’. Ellie was fourteen. Just a kid. Not even old enough to drive.” His thumb was tracing a line back and forth against your thigh as he recounted his past. “We were settin’ everything up, I looked away for a minute⏤ just a minute⏤ and she was gone. I left Sarah with Tess, called the cops, then Tommy and I were tearin’ apart the woods lookin’ for her.” Joel carried a tension in his shoulders as he spoke and you leaned in closer to him to offer physical reassurance without interrupting him. “I heard Ellie scream. That sound… it’s carved into my very soul. I’ll never forget it. I found her in this beat up RV by the lake. Some sick son of a bitch had snatched her and was tryin’ to…” Joel locked his jaw. Silence settled between the two of you for a moment. Your heart ached for him and it ached for his daughter. You couldn’t even begin to imagine the horror. Joel shook his head finally. “Ellie’s a fighter. She always has been. Arguably to a fault.” He let out a sad chuckle at the praise, but it faded. “She had clawed his face up, broke his finger, hell, she even managed to bite off the upper part of the bastard’s ear… Ellie held him off, and I got there in time. When I saw him though…” Joel squeezed your thigh and this time he didn’t let up. “God, I saw red, darlin’. Ripped him off her and nearly killed him. I would’ve except I heard Ellie cryin’ and I stopped to grab her. Cops showed up around then. Sick bastard was lucky it was the cops and not Tommy. Tommy wouldn’t have stopped me. Not for that.”

“She’s okay? Ellie?” You asked softly.

“Yeah. She’s strong. Stronger than me even.” A flash of pride filled his features while praising his daughter’s strength, “She got that from her mom.” You knew that Joel wasn’t related to Ellie by blood. He had shared that bit of information with you early on when he first told you about his daughters. That was all you knew of the fact though. You didn’t know how Joel knew Ellie’s mom or how she came to be adopted by him. “Since then though, I’ve always had a hair trigger for that kind of shit. More so than I used to. Just brings up bad memories.”

“I could only imagine.” You replied. “I’m so sorry, Joel.”

“No need for you to be.”

“Still…” You searched for something to say, but there were no words that came to mind. Instead, you rested your head between his shoulder and chest. Joel responded by letting the arm draped on the couch behind you wrap around your own shoulders as his right hand continued to reach across his lap and rest on your thigh. Softly, you spoke, “Sarah and Ellie are lucky to have you.”

Joel gave a small shake of his head, “I’m lucky to have them.”

“Well, then,” You lifted your head just enough to meet his gaze and gave him a tight lipped smile, “I’m lucky to have you.”

“Wrong again.” Joel chuckled and there was a softness in his eyes as he studied your features.

That didn’t feel true to you. It had been so long since you felt protected to this degree. For literal years, you only had yourself to rely on. Of course you always had Nima and Henry at the bake shop, they’d move mountains for you, but the thought of bothering them kept you from ever wanting to ask for too much. However, when Joel took care of you, it never made you feel like a burden. It felt like you could breathe fully and freely for the first time in a long time⏤ as if the concrete blocks once tied to your ankles were gone and you could now stretch your wings and be yourself.

Your gaze found its way to his lips before bouncing back up to his eyes. The plan had been to gain the courage to close this gap and share that physical intimacy with him, but the two of you seemed to find a different kind of intimacy altogether. You leaned in and rather than kissing him like you had been craving all night, you lightly set your lips against his jawline, in that same spot you had admired earlier in the night, and then laid your head back on his shoulder. You curled in closer into him and Joel wrapped around your once more as if it were simply natural to do so.

“You’re a good man.” You mumbled and listened to the steady thrum of his heart under your ear.

You felt Joel suck in a sharp, shaky breath and hold it. Eternity seemed to pass before he slowly breathed out. Joel turned his head, you could feel him moving, and he pressed a kiss to your hairline⏤ lingering there with his lips to your skin as he mumbled, “No, sugar. I’m really not.”

There was an underlying tone to his words you didn't recognize, but there was nothing that could convince you otherwise of your beliefs. You were lucky to have Joel in your life, and he was a good man.

taglist (closed):

@weddingfairy @bfences @fairntonorth @jasminedragon @biwitchy @huffle-punk @shelbyteller @anoverwhelmingdin @aheadfullofsteverogers @stagerightlauren @basicoccult @rinnfey @boofy1998 @farintonorth @thepascalofus @amatis-gray @casa-boiardi @northernbluess @jettia @sapphicsoie @spidey-3 @camiali25 @hrtsforpascal @gingersince97 @sentients17 @bigboiseason123 @lunxramour @ktheunready @heyheyheygaypay @keepingupwiththeskywalkers @adoringanakin @come-hell-or-eldren-fire @cherriebat @whitewolfstar01 @alyssa121611 @asreadbyaj @painfullyandprettypoetic @cantobightcafe @hellooseulgi @str84pedro

[previous][next]

✨J.M. Masterlist✨

#tlou fanfiction #the last of us fanfiction #joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #sugar daddy!joel miller x reader #sugar daddy!joel miller #take care of you

707 notes · View notes

joeys-babe · 5 months

Text

Joey B Blurbs: Water

————————————————————————-

Summary: While bored at home during the twin’s nap time, you try the Water by Tyla Tiktok trend on your husband Joe.

Warnings: nothing really. fluff, unserious/funny

Pairing: Joe Burrow x reader

Imagine universe: Into The Mystic

————————————————————————-

November 6th - Day after win over the Bills

(yn’s pov)

Joe and I were currently cuddled up on the couch in comfortable silence, the only sounds being of the overhead fan and TV quietly playing the science channel.

Yesterday the Bengals had yet again a big win and it seemed like things were starting to click with the team. That Bye Week was exactly what they needed to set the season on a good path.

I scrolled through TikTok on my phone, one Airpod in my ear so I could hear the audio while leaving one ear free to hear any remarks from Joe about what he was watching on the TV.

Lately, my FYP consisted of puppies, couples, other WAGS, and thirst edits of Joe (I'm not ashamed).

Just under two weeks ago, I pranked Joe after seeing a video on TikTok and I wouldn't be lying if I said I have a couple more trends I've wanted to test on him.

One of them is the trend that consisted of you playing the song “Water” by Tyla as you secretly record your man to see if they'll try to get a peak of the screen to see her do the water dance.

I already knew that Joe would never openly fawn over another woman in front of me, or in private either really. Knowing it wouldn't have a super-positive impact on me and our relationship. But, there was still a part of me that wanted to see how he'd react to it.

Hell, he probably didn't even know the trend; which honestly would be the best outcome.

My head was lying comfortably on Joe’s shoulder as he intently paid attention to his favorite channel. I discreetly took my Airpod out of my ear and back in the case before pulling up the audio.

I had my phone angled to where it was hidden discreetly but Joe was still in frame.

The show was on a commercial break and through the camera view it showed Joe scrolling on his phone, occasionally laughing at something then scrolling on.

Turning my volume button up, I clicked the record button and studied Joe’s expression.

As soon as he turned I looked at him with a shocked look, but he was only grinning and showing me this video of a fainting goat on his Instagram feed; not even paying attention to the audio.

When he noticed the bitchy look on my face he immediately looked at me rather confused.

“What? Do you not think it's funny?” - Joe

My gaze on him softened when the fact he didn't know any significance of the audio became apparent. When I moved my phone out of its hiding spot and Joe realized he was being recorded, he looked at me even more confused.

“What are you doing?” - Joe

I turned the video off with a laugh and pecked his lips. When I pulled away Joe still looked lost and a little annoyed as to why I hadn't started explaining myself yet.

“Do you not recognize that song?” - you laughed

“No…” - Joe gave you a puzzled look

“It was a little TikTok trend that girls do on their boys. you, my love, are one of the very few that passed.” - you

“Yay?” - Joe

“Very yay, Joey!” - you giggled

Joe smiled slightly before gesturing to the TV that was counting down the time left on the commercial break.

“Can we watch the show now?” - Joe

“Of course. You had such a good reaction that I'm gonna bake you a pumpkin pie later.” - you

“Really?!” - Joe

“Yup!” - you

Joe squeezed me as a thank you and nuzzled his face in my neck, suddenly feeling the need to be cuddled.

“I still don't know what I did that was so right, but I'm glad I made you happy.” - Joe

————————————————————————-

Authors note: this fic was too short to even qualify as an imagine so here’s my first blurb!

Hope you enjoyed! ❤️

#joe burrow #bengals #joe burrow imagine #joe burrow x reader #joey b #cincinnati bengals #joe burrow fan fic

330 notes · View notes

imaginespazzi · 2 months

Text

Part 1: Don't Be A Stranger

Masterlist - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5

But if (my) world was ending, you'd come over right?

(In which UCLA anon's roman empire became this writer's roman empire and we've finally reached the beginning)

Pairing: Paige Bueckers X Azzi Fudd

Themes: Angst, Pining, Hurt/Comfort and a little bit of Fluff

Words: 8.4 K (other parts will be shorter....maybe)

TW: Swearing, Alcohol, Injuries, Alludes to Sexual Content

A/N: Hello my lovelies <3 Gonna keep this as short and sweet as possible but we've finally, finally gotten to the UCLA fic. A huge shout out to UCLA anon, because this is their master idea. Couple of things, I've never been to LA or UCLA and therefore some things are out of whack. The timeline is also a little out of whack but I swear I will try to keep it as consistent as possible. In the mean time, just ignore some of the inconsistencies pretty please. As always, feel free to let me know what's bad, what's good and what else you'd like to see. I hope y'all enjoy this first part and let's get another W today!

August 2021

where are you

i literally have to be at the airport in an hour paige where are you

dude

are you on your way?

you better be driving and that’s why you’re not answering

PAIGE

i’m sorry about last night i shouldn’t have said that

but you said a lot of shit too so call it even?

this isn’t funny where are you?

i have to leave in 15 mins

are you actually not coming?

wtf????

this is actually bullshit

get over yourself bueckers

wow

fuck you

just landed

thought you might like to know

sorry my plane didn’t crash i guess

September 2021

dude enough okay

can you just call me back??

i just wanna talk

i know you're mad i get it but i miss you

November 2021

hi i’mma be in dc over christmas

nvm

idk why i’m trying again

maybe i should block you

this is kinda pathetic of me what the fuck

December 2021

i thought i saw you today but idk

couldn’t have been you cause if it was

would you really not even say hi?

i’m done trying paige

merry christmas i guess

March 2022

i misz you

lyke a wot

love uuuuu pppppp

even if ur a bwtich

pkese pick up

ignore that

people drunk text exes apparently i drunk text you

wait

i don’t need to tell you that

you already ignore it all anyways

August 2022

i heard about the acl

i’m sorry

idk if it means anything, but if you wanna talk

nvm

***

September 2022

When the doorbell rings, on a quiet Thursday afternoon during a rare moment of alone time, Paige expects it to be a lot of people. One of her parents deciding that they actually weren’t going to leave her alone. Someone else in her family showing up out of the blue to provide comfort. Maybe one of her teammates popping up to keep her entertained. She even thinks it might be some random fan who got too invested and figured out the address for her air BnB. It’s the saddest testament to how broken they are, that the idea of it being Azzi Fudd standing outside her door, never once crosses her mind. But there she is, when Paige opens the door, dressed in ripped jean shorts and a light blue tank top, the girl that had been her best friend, and maybe a little bit more.

Silence stretches between them as Azzi fidgets with her hands and Paige continues to stoically stare at her. It’s been almost a year since they’ve seen each other, even longer since they’d last shared a happy smile. And you’d have to go back to before she’d told her about her future plans, to find the last time Azzi had properly looked Paige in the eyes.

“Hi,” Azzi says finally, mustering up a small smile. Paige doesn’t know if hearing that voice, soft and subdued but still so familiar, fixes a crack or breaks her heart even further. She wills herself to be polite in response, to match Azzi’s polite greeting with a greeting of her own. But there’s clear discord between her mouth and her head, because her words are harsh and hollowed.

“What are you doing here?”

Azzi swallows, smile disappearing as she immediately digs her fingernails into her palms and Paige feels the guilt settle into her stomach. It’s like the night before all over again. If she closes her eyes, Paige can still hear her voice loudly echoing in Azzi’s childhood bedroom. She can hear the angry words that she’d hurled at her best friend, each one like a well-aimed arrow piercing the other’s girl's heart and tearing into Paige’s own soul. Some would call what she’d done self-preservation. She’d call it her biggest mistake.

“I um-,” Azzi sucks in her bottom lip, “I was in the area and thought, maybe I’d check in.”

“How did you even know where I was?” Paige hates how cold and accusatory her voice sounds. It’s a version of herself she doesn’t quite know how to deal with, one that hasn’t ever appeared for anyone other than the girl in front of her, “I know I didn’t tell you.”

Any semblance of calm is gone from Azzi’s face, as she seems to realise that she’s not going to be getting any cordiality from her old friend.

“And we’re off to a great start,” she mutters under her breath before replying to Paige’s exact question, “no you didn’t. Your dad-”

“You talked to my dad?”

“Yeah. I mean you know Drew looks up to Jon and José so much and they still talk and stuff and he came over- Drew I mean- and then your dad was there and we just got to talking and you came up and yeah. He told me and well I live here, kinda, so I thought- well I thought maybe you’d like some company?”

As Azzi’s rambling explanation comes to an end, Paige doesn’t miss the tinge of hopefulness in her voice at the last bit. The younger girl shuffles her feet, as she stares at the blonde expectantly.

“I don’t-” Paige struggles to draw in a breath as the voices in her head argue, “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

Her words are met with silence as Azzi stares at her blankly.

“I- you,” she blinks rapidly, clearly at a loss for what to say at the blatant rejection, “I can’t come in?”

“It’s just- I’ve had a lot of people visit you know,” Paige bullshits, suddenly feeling very exhausted, “and my family were here a couple days and my friends are coming soon and-”

“And I’m neither of those things,” Azzi says, her tone low and breathy.

“That’s not what-”

“It is,” Azzi closes her eyes for a brief second, when she opens them, the flash of hurt in them feels like a dagger through Paige’s chest, “it is like that and it is what you meant and it’s- it’s fine.”

“Az-” Paige chokes out, feeling her lungs collapse when the other girl moves to leave, “please,” and she’s not even sure she’s asking for, but it’s not this. It’s never been this.

Azzi stops and when she turns back around, there’s a determined look on her face.

“I just-” she rubs her face, composing herself before focusing her eyes on Paige, “you’re the strongest person I know. And you’re going to come back from this, better than ever. I know it. The whole world knows it. Because you’re Paige Bueckers. You’re something else. You’re the hardest worker, you’re just- you’re the best.”

“You don’t-”

“Just- just let me finish okay and then, then I’ll go or whatever but Paige, you’re all of those things you know? Strong, brave, the best fucking player- but, it’s also okay if sometimes-, if sometimes you aren’t. It’s okay because this- this is hard, I know it is. So if sometimes you’re not strong or-, or brave- or not feeling like working hard- it’s okay. And if there are moments where you- where you want to give up, that’s okay too. It doesn’t make you- it doesn’t make you any less than what you are. It just makes you human, and it’s okay you know- to be human. It’s okay if- if you hurt and it’s okay if you’re not okay. It’s- it’s okay.”

The two girls stare at each other, eyes shining with tears, as Paige let’s Azzi’s words wash over her. She’s been told a lot of platitudes about her injury, from her coaches to her teammates to her family. And she knows she has plenty of people in her corner, who root for her and who genuinely do believe she’ll have the greatest comeback ever. But the motivational speeches get draining after a while and all she’s wanted to do for the last couple of weeks is wallow. Then she felt guilty about wallowing, that little voice in her head yelling at her to be productive and work on getting back to herself because that’s what everybody expected. Paige hadn’t even realised how badly she needed someone to give her permission to not be okay, not until the only person who’d ever known that part of her, had finally said the words she so desperately needed to hear.

The thing is, when she was younger, Paige used to keep everything bottled inside. She’d always been hyper aware of her privilege and her problems had always just seemed so insignificant in front of her parents’ or her friends. So she’d kept them to herself, trapping herself in a web of her own burdens that sometimes threatened to strangle her. And then she’d met a girl at a USA basketball camp when she was 15, a girl who had gently flicked her fingers and Paige’s walls had fallen like dominoes. She hadn’t even known she was drowning, until Azzi had shown up with a lifeboat.

“I just-,” Azzi breaks Paige out of her trance by breaking the eye contact between them, “I didn’t know if anybody had said that to you yet and I just- I wanted you to hear it.”

In the span of a minute, a thousand and one phrases take birth in Paige’s mind and then die on the tip of her tongue. She opens and closes her mouth, trying to express even one of the myriad of emotions that are swirling like a tornado in her brain. But nothing comes out except a litany of incomprehensible noises. And Azzi seems to find the wrong answer in the silence, giving the blonde a timid nod.

“Take care of yourself P,” her voice catches on the familiar nickname, as she shoots Paige a sad smile, before beginning to walk away. When Azzi chose UCLA, she’d lit Paige's heart on fire. So, Paige had drowned their friendship. And while all this time Azzi has struggled to breathe, Paige has burned but god, is she so fucking tired of it.

“Fuck, Azzi wait,” Paige curses, hobbling to catch up to the brunette, who stops with a sigh but doesn’t make a move to return. Stubborn as always, Paige thinks, continuing her way over. When she does catch up, she’s not fully sure what to say and so, “I uh- I’m out of milk.”

Azzi raises her eyebrows in question, crossing her arms protectively around her chest.

“I can’t drive,” Paige explains slowly, “or walk obviously.”

Realisation dawns on Azzi’s face, “you’re asking me to drive you to the grocery store?”

“I guess,” Paige shrugs, trying to be nonchalant.

“Seems like the kind of favour someone asks of their family, or their friends,” Azzi emphasises bitterly, never one to let go of an opportunity for sarcasm.

Paige flinches, “right, I kinda deserved that one.”

She gets a raised eyebrow in response that very much says “ya think?”

“I’m trying here,” she says quietly, and Azzi’s hard demeanour softens, “I’m raising a white flag Az, calling a truce or whatever but it kinda needs to go both ways.”

“What do you think me coming here was supposed to be?” the younger girl says exasperatedly, but she’s smiling again. It’s the third one Paige has gotten out of her today, and finally, she smiles back. They look a little foolish, standing in the apartment hallway, cheshire-cat-grinning at each other like idiots, but it feels like something has clicked into place again.

“I’ll go grab my wallet, you go heat up the car.”

“It’s like 110 degrees dude.”

“Bro shut up, you know what I mean,” Paige huffs and when it makes Azzi laugh, she feels like she’s floating. It’s not as if she hasn’t been happy in a year because won’t you look at that, her world did keep turning after that one decision. But this is different. She feels airy and light, like she could jump off a cliff and fly instead of fall.

“Well hurry up, I have things to do outside of just being your chauffeur.”

“Poor passenger princess, how the roles have reversed,” Paige mocks and it earns her an ever so familiar fond eye roll and for the first time in a year, she feels free.

***

When she gets downstairs, Azzi’s leaning against her car door, a pair of sunglasses shielding her eyes. The hot California sun shines brightly against her tan skin, and Paige’s heart stutters because fuck, Azzi is golden. She looks every bit reminiscent of the girl Paige still has memorised and yet, every bit the promise of a girl Paige wants to learn by heart.

“Nice car,” Paige smirks, alerting the younger girl of her presence.

“It does the job,” Azzi says, looking up with a smile of her own, opening the passenger door for Paige to get in, “not all of us are raking in NIL deals to get the big guns, but we make do.”

“Steph Curry brand ambassador say what now?” the blonde girl teases as she slides into the car. When she looks up, Azzi’s frozen in place, “what?”

“Nothing I just-” she’s wearing sunglasses, but Paige knows Azzi's trying to avert her gaze, “I’m kinda surprised you know that.”

It’s Paige’s turn to look away, their newfound comfort giving away to that old awkwardness, “I keep up with most basketball news.”

To Azzi’s credit she doesn’t push. Instead, she makes her way into the driver seat without another sound. She’s about to connect her phone to the aux but Paige beats her to it.

“Hey,” Azzi squeals, making grabby hands, “my car, my rules, my music.”

“Nuh-uh injury privileges,” Paige gloats, sticking out her tongue.

“That’s not a thing.”

“Is too.”

“Fine, we’ll listen to your crap music.”

“I resent that,” Paige retorts, as Drake blasts through the speakers. The sound of it makes Azzi groan, and she dramatically bangs her head against the steering wheel. Paige spends the rest of the car ride singing at the top of her lungs. Azzi spends the rest of the car ride alternating between shaking her head and joining in with the singing. It’s like they’re back in 2020 all over again, back before they found themselves in the whirlwind of life, back when they were just Paige and Azzi.

***

Their trip inside the grocery store takes less time than the ride to get there, even if Paige takes her time dilly-dallying in the dairy section, pretending she’s going to get anything other than just regular milk. She’s overly conscious of the fact that their time together might be coming to an end, that this time she might actually have to deal with saying goodbye. But she’s not ready to go back to missing Azzi just yet.

“Maybe you can show me your dorm,” she says quietly, once they're both back in the car, playing with the hem of her shirt. Beside her, Azzi draws in a sharp intake of breath, clearly not having expected Paige to want that of all things. In all honesty, the idea of stepping into the world that had stolen Azzi from her is not all that appealing to Paige but she wants to hold onto this moment just a little bit longer.

“You wanna see my dorm?”

“A chance to see how the non-blue blood peasants live? I’d never pass it up.”

“Non blue blood,” Azzi scoffs, "Ever heard of John Wooden?”

“I was talking about women’s basketball but yeah I have heard of him. I won the award last year. Over you,” Paige smirks, wiggling her eyebrows.

“Not everyone’s a phenom their freshman year,” Azzi retorts fondly, unable to mask the hint of pride in her voice.

“Well we’ll see this year-” Paige stops herself, cold seeping into her lungs, as she remembers why she’s in the stupid state of California in the first place. The lighthearted mood in the car goes tumbling out the window as her words hang like a dagger in the air.

“Paige,” Azzi whispers, trying to wrap that one syllable in comfort. She reaches out to touch the blonde’s shoulder but must think better of it because her hand hovers mid-air for a second, before she pulls it back. Paige is suddenly hyper aware of the fact they haven’t touched yet. It’s a reminder of the fact that whatever progress they’ve made today, there’s still so much they haven’t even begun to unpack.

“It’s fine,” Paige’s voice is steely, “just drive.”

Azzi opens and closes her mouth a couple of times, before simply nodding and starting the ignition. She’s clearly holding back and Paige doesn’t know how to feel about it. There’s a part of her that wants Azzi to push her to talk like she would before, but there's another part of her that knows this new rope they’re trying to string between them is fragile.

They ride in silence to Azzi’s apartment, both of them too caught up in their own thoughts to bother with music this time. As the UCLA campus nears, Paige can’t help but hate it just a little bit. She’s aware she’s being petty. Acting like Storrs, Connecticut is some hub of beauty is probably a stretch of the imagination for anyone but she’s determined to dislike this place out of principle.

“Hmm not too shabby but like where’s the fucking cows?” Paige jokes, as the car comes to a stop in front of Azzi’s apartment building. She steps out gingerly, pretending to inspect her surroundings, making tsk-tsk noises at the most random things.

“I’ve seen your apartment Bueckers, don’t even try,” Azzi retorts.

It shouldn’t surprise Paige to see one of Azzi’s teammates when they enter her living room. It’s just like UConn really in the sense that there’s always someone there when you walk in but something about seeing Charisma Osborne just chilling in Azzi’s space suddenly makes it more real that the younger girl is definitely a UCLA Bruin.

“Oh,” Charisma gives Paige a once-over, clearly not having expected to see her, “hi Paige.”

Paige waves, shuffling her weight on her crutches, unsure what to say. It’s not like she doesn’t know Charisma, they’ve literally won a gold medal together for USA basketball. She’s even met the girl a couple of times after and she likes her, she does. But her bitter brain is focused on the fact that this is one of those girls who had gotten Azzi as their teammate, one of the girls who got to see Azzi everyday. All things Paige had not gotten.

“You didn’t tell me you were bringing company Az,” Charisma says pointedly, looking at Azzi and Paige bristles at the use of the nickname. She’s being all sorts of ridiculous but at least she’s self-aware of it.

“Last minute decisions,” Azzi replies airily. The two girls lock eyes and Paige can tell they’re having some sort of unspoken conversation and now the green-eyed envy monster is out in full force.

“I insisted on seeing her dorm,” she says finally, breaking into whatever staring competition the two UCLA guards are having.

“It’s not a problem,” Charisma reassures, standing up from her position on the couch, and coming over to give Paige a tentative hug, “I just didn’t know you were coming. But it’s good to see you, Paige.”

“Yeah,” Paige tries to muster up a proper smile as she leans in to return the hug but it comes out more like a grimace, “you too.”

“We’re gonna go chill in my room,” Azzi says, beckoning to one of the doors in the hallways and Paige obediently follows her, waving a half-hearted goodbye to Charisma. She’s secretly pleased to have Azzi back to herself.

The room is nothing out of the ordinary except it has Azzi all over it. She’s in the pink comforter that is thrown haphazardly over a clearly not made bed. She’s in the unicorn plushies laid delicately over a dark blue couch. She’s in the little flower stickers that outline the mirror on the far side of the room. There’s a wall dedicated solely to pictures and fairy lights on one side and Paige is immediately drawn to it. A familiar ache reverberates in her chest as her eyes flicker over the pictures of Azzi’s family. She’s missed them. Then there’s the photographs of Azzi in her UCLA uniform, her teammates surrounding her and Paige has to resist the dangerous urge to rip those off the wall. Be happy for her happiness, the logical part of her brain yells, not seeming to realise she’d left any chance of that in the dirt a year ago. As she tears her eyes away from those offending pictures, they land instead on a whole other set of photographs and she feels her heart catch in her throat.

It’s a set of three images of her and Azzi, taken at various moments. Paige brushes her thumb against the one of the two of them with their arms around each other at the Minnesota state fair. Azzi’s beaming at the camera and Paige is beaming at Azzi. They look so young, so naive, so happy.

“I’m on your wall,” Paige breathes out, turning to face her best friend, “Fuck, I’m on you wall.”

“Of course you are,” Azzi affirms, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world but she shuffles nervously, giving away the reality behind her stable demeanour.

“I never answered your texts. I didn’t call you back,” Paige lists quietly as the first tear falls from her eyes; she’s been holding them back all day, “and I’m on your fucking wall.”

Azzi looks away, unsure how to deal with the fact that apparently they’re no longer tip-toeing around the past. She doesn’t know how to tell the blonde that there had never really been a second thought about whether or not those photos were going up on the wall.

“Doesn’t matter,” she shrugs finally, “you’re my best friend. You’re always gonna be my best friend. Ride or die right?”

“Ride or die,” Paige repeats in a whisper before she all but throws herself at Azzi, practically moulding herself into the younger girl’s body. Caught off guard, Azzi stiffens for a second, before relaxing into it. It’s late outside and the sun has set, but in this moment, the world shines the brightest it has in a year as two stubborn girls finally find their way home to each other.

***

That night, Azzi asks her tentatively if she wants to stay over and of course Paige agrees. Lying awake next to a familiar stranger, she lets herself finally remember the day things had first started unravelling.

November 2020

“You’ll probably get one of the upstairs apartments, so we probably won’t actually be living together which is good because can you imagine if I had to see your goofy ass 24/7?” Paige puts a dramatic hand to her forehead, as she leads Azzi into her room.

She’s too caught up in her excitement having Azzi at UConn, and planning what’ll happen next year, to notice that the girl in question isn’t participating at all in her enthusiasm. Paige has been waiting for what feels like a year (in reality it’s only been a few months) to finally have her best friend come visit. The minute the car had pulled up, she’d taken it upon herself to start her sales pitch all over again, missing the sympathetic smiles she’d gotten from the rest of the Fudd family as she pulled Azzi away to show her the glories of the campus.

“Did you see my assist to Christyn today?” Paige gloats, falling onto her bed with a smirk.

“It was pretty great,” Azzi concedes.

“It was fucking perfect thank you very much. I set her up perfectly, exactly how she likes it.”

“Right.”

“And then did you see how excited the team was for her? For everyone? Never gonna find a greater group of girls.”

“They seem wonderful P.”

Paige furrows her eyebrows as she catches Azzi still lingering by the door instead of joining her on the bed. The brunette fidgets with the sleeve of her sweater, chewing on her lips.

“Are you allergic to my bed?” Paige waits for some smartass response. When she doesn’t get one, she frowns, instincts going haywire, “Az, you good?”

“I- '' Azzi looks away, swallowing nervously, “I need to tell you something and I- I’m not sure how you’re gonna react.”

“You get a boyfriend or a girlfriend or something in the last few months that I don’t know about?” She says it light-heartedly enough, but the thought of it sends a sharp sting through Paige’s heart. In hindsight, she thinks maybe she could have dealt with it having been that.

“What? No. Just- just don’t- dont take it personally okay. Like you can be upset about it but- but don’t hold it against me yeah? My parents- they said- they said you’d get it. You’d be upset but you’d- you’d get it because you- you get me right?”

Paige’s chest hammers as she watches the younger girl draw in a deep breath, “you’re scaring the shit out of me right now.”

“I’mcommittingtoUCLA” Azzi says all in one breath, the words blending together.

She’s sure she’s heard it wrong. There’s no way. After all this time, after all their conversations, all the pitches, how hard she had worked, there was no way this was going to be the end to all of Paige’s efforts.

“What?” she whispers, crossing her fingers that she has in fact misheard.

When Azzi averts her eyes, she knows she hasn’t, “I’m committing to UCLA.”

The first time Paige and Azzi met was somewhat awkward, what with Azzi’s shyness and Paige being slightly overeager to make a new friend. When they’d become bus buddies, they’d progressed to being casual acquaintances who could small talk and share smiles. And then the flight back to Minnesota happened and everything had changed. Every moment after was filled with conversation or laughs or a comfortable silence. Until this one, where the sudden silence between them foreshadows an ominous future.

“Say something,” Azzi says finally, her voice shaking.

Paige stares at her for a second before, “you named your dog Stewie.”

“What?”

“You named your dog Stewie. After Breanna Stewart who played at UConn. It’s not-” Paige wracks her brain, hands flying animatedly “it’s not Meyers or something, after someone who played at fucking UCLA. You named your dog after a UConn great. How are you going to take him to UCLA with you?”

Azzi stares at her, clearly not having expected that level of questioning of all things. Who could blame her when Paige herself feels a little insane.

“This is a joke right? You’re fucking with me? Ha ha ha very funny,” she claps deliriously, “hilarious prank seriously, like hats off you’ve outdone yourself but enough okay? Say sike right fucking now.”

Azzi makes a strangled noise, “it’s not a joke Paige. That’s- that’s my decision.”

“Then change it,” Paige yells, catapulting off the bed.

“Paige-”

“Have you told UCLA yet?”

“I wanted to tell my family and you first.”

“Oh wow, how kind of you. How fucking generous of you to do that Azzi,” Paige bites back sarcastically and Azzi flinches.

In a flash, Paige’s expression goes from angry to desperate, “you still have time to change your mind . Please just- just think about it again okay? You still have so much time and you know what, stay here for a couple more days. Spend time with the team, with the coaches, with me and you’ll see-. UCLA just sounds nice you know? California, the sun, I get it, of course it’s tempting. But just- just stay here okay? And you’ll see this is where you belong,” she leaves the, with me, unsaid.

“Paige,” Azzi’s voice cracks. She takes a step toward her and then pauses. It’s the first time in a long time that Azzi’s hesitated when it comes to Paige. It won’t be the last. And when she looks at Paige through her long eyelashes, tears threatening to fall from her dark brown eyes, Paige knows she’s lost.

“No,” she’s pacing now, chest heaving up and down in a combination of frustration, anger and misery, “this is not fucking happening. We’re not doing this. I made you a whole recruitment video. Did you watch it? Do you know how long it took me to make it? Has the last year been a fucking joke to you?”

“Of course not-”

“Don’t even. Because clearly- clearly it has. Must’ve been hilarious watching me beg and plead with you when you already fucking knew you were going to committ somewhere else.”

“That’s not fair,” Azzi’s voice rises at the accusation, “I had no idea where I was going until a couple of weeks ago. You can’t seriously think that low of me.”

“Not fair? You know what’s not fair, Azzi? We’ve been talking about playing together, about finally being on the same team, the same fucking state, for years. What’s not fair is you throwing all of that away on a whim.”

“I’m not committing to UCLA on a whim. This is my whole future we’re talking about. You don’t even know how much thought I’ve put into it. And I’m choosing what’s best for me. You can’t hold that against me Paige. You can’t.”

They stand on opposite sides of the room, taking in harsh staggered breaths and glaring at each other. The tension in the room is electric as the string connecting them frays. Paige and Azzi bicker, they don’t argue. Or at least, that’s how it used to be.

“Az?” their stare down is broken by a knock on the door as Katie Fudd lets herself in. Immediately, as she stares between her daughter and the girl who’d become just as important, Katie knows what has happened, “we’re going back to the air BnB, are you staying here?”

The answer should be obvious, like it used to be. Of course she would stay here. It was meant to be a no-brainer. But before Azzi can say that, Paige intervenes and the string snaps.

“She’s going with you,” the blonde says firmly, before turning her back. She won’t let Azzi see the tears, she won’t. For her part, the brunette stares at Paige’s back silently for a couple of seconds, before a mask of determination slips on.

“Fine. If that’s what you fucking want,” Azzi sneers before brushing past her mom, eager to get away and hide her own tears.

When Paige turns back around, Katie is already looking at her. The older woman walks the length of the room and pulls the younger girl into a hug that she readily melts into. Paige sniffles as Azzi’s mom soothingly rubs her back.

“We’re driving back tomorrow morning,” Katie whispers quietly into Paige’s hair, “I know you’re mad sweetheart but come say goodbye okay?”

And she does. She shows up with only half an hour or so remaining before Azzi leaves, but Paige shows up. They hug stiffly, exchanging maybe a sentence or two but in that moment it’s enough. They’ll call later when Azzi gets home and it’ll be awkward for a little bit but they’ll break through. They’ll figure out a way to go on without having to talk about the “big thing”. They’ll hold on as long as they can, until they can’t anymore.

***

September 2022

After the night Paige stays over at Azzi’s apartment, they're attached at the hip for the next few weeks, just like old times. They’ve fallen into a routine of sorts. Azzi shows up without fail every day after practice to pick Paige up from her rehab, and then the rest of the younger girl’s time is Paige’s. The first time she’d seen the brunette leaning casually against her car, Paige had had to stop herself from jumping into her arms. She’d played it as nonchalant as possible, joking about Azzi being stalker, but inside, she could feel it again, the dangerously familiar tap of this is all I’ll ever need.

On days Paige doesn’t have rehab, Azzi still shows up right on time on her doorstep with a board game or food or something. It’s gotten to the point where every time the doorbell rings, Paige opens it expecting Azzi. The couple times it’s not, she tries and fails to hide the disappointment on her face. It earns her an eye roll from the delivery guy but it’s worth it for the laugh it elicits from Azzi when she tells her the story. They fall back together as if they’d never fallen apart. And what’s more terrifying than finding out that she’d never truly gotten over old Azzi, is realising how easy it would be to fall in love with new Azzi.

When Caroline, Nika and Piath come to visit the weekend after, all three of them can immediately tell that something's changed. Their teammate seems lighter, as if she’s finally found a sense of calm. But their incessant prodding and raised eyebrows are only met with shrugs from a tight-lipped Paige. It isn’t until Azzi calls, and Nika snatches the phone out of Paige’s hands, gasping at the callerID, that they finally figure out why their point guard has a new kick in her step.

“You should invite her out with us tonight,” Caroline is the first to speak, giving Paige an encouraging smile.

“Carol,” Nika hisses, “we can’t just invite the enemy.”

“She’s not the enemy,” Paige defends immediately, “we don’t even have a rivalry with UCLA.”

Nika scoffs indignantly, “of course she is. She picked a different school over us. Over UConn! That’s weird. Who even does that?”

“Lots of people do,” Caroline, who occasionally texts Azzi (albeit she’s kept that somewhat of a secret), supplies helpfully, shrugging when the Croatian glares at her.

Piath nudges Paige when she notices the other girl has gone quiet, “ignore Nika. She doesn’t mean it, you know that. If you wanna invite her, invite her.”

And she does, she wants to so badly. It’s insane really because it hasn’t even been a full day since they’d last seen each other but Paige swears something inside her has been missing since. There’s something awfully terrifying about letting Azzi back into the UConn version of her world, the world that the younger girl had once rejected. Still, if they’re going to try this again, she supposes sooner or later, it’ll have to happen.

“Put her on speaker,” Nika orders when Paige grabs her phone back from her.

“Nika,” Caroline, younger only by age, warns, pulling the other girl away, “we’re supposed to be cheering her up, not making life harder.”

Azzi answers on the third ring, her voice teasing “miss me already?”

Yes, Paige thinks, sometimes I think I miss you even when you’re right here next to me, sometimes I think I’ll miss you forever. But she doesn’t say any of that.

“Not a chance,” she scoffs instead, “besides you called me first.”

“Butt dial.”

“Mmmhmm I’m sure.”

“Shut up,” Azzi laughs and Paige is glad her teammates aren’t here to see the goofy grin that appears on her face at the sound of it, “I just wanted to see if we were doing something tonight?”

“Yeah- umm- you remember I told you about the girls coming down this weekend. They- uh- they wanted to go out tonight and uh- you could come along?”

There’s a pause on the other end and Paige knows Azzi’s going through the same thought process as her.

“I don’t wanna intrude on your time with your team P-”

“You wouldn’t be intruding,” Paige cuts in immediately and although she figured her teammates were definitely eavesdropping, Nika cursing about her being “pussywhipped” followed by in-sync shushing from Piath and Caroline, gives them away.

On the other end of the line, Azzi’s quiet again, “it’s okay P, you go have fun with your friends. We don’t have to spend every night together. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

What she doesn’t say is that maybe they need to learn how to live like that again, how to live apart again. Paige is almost done with the LA part of her rehab, something both of them are still in denial about. It’s only a matter of time before they return back to their two separate worlds and neither of them are sure they’ve managed to repair their friendship enough to not slip back into their foolishness again.

“But I wanna see you tonight,” Paige whines, her tone teetering on the edge of sounding like a desperate girlfriend, “please.”

“Paige-”

“Pleaseeeeeee. I’m literally injured and begging Az, it’d be mean to say no.”

“What does your injury even have to do with any of this?” Azzi sighs exasperatedly, “but yeah okay fine calm down Bueckers. Send me an address, I’ll be there.”

“You don’t wanna come pregame here?”

“Dude, let's not push it, okay?”

“Yeah, yeah okay see you,” Paige pauses, “hey Az?”

“Hmm?”

“I’m really happy you’re coming tonight.”

“I’m really happy you’re happy P.”

***

Azzi Fudd is a menace. See, people often get fooled by her soft-spoken nature and shy demeanour, but Paige has been around her long enough to know the truth. In the beginning it was the witty quips the younger girl always had ready whenever they were having some ridiculous argument. After that, it was the direct pranks that wreaked havoc on Paige’s life. But tonight, in Paige’s opinion, tonight is Azzi’s worst offence. She had to have done it on purpose, had to have known the sheer effect it would have on Paige to see her dressed like that. The red criss-cross tank top fits her like a mould and the way her ripped jeans shorts cling to her hips leaves little to the imagination. Her diamond belly button piercing shines against her skin, taunting Paige. She wants to touch, she wants to feel, she wants to do all the unspeakable things in her mind but she’s forced to just watch.

What she hates most though, is that everybody else is watching too. Since Azzi’s walked into the club, Paige has had to fight the urge to strangle every stranger who had given her best friend an appraising once-over. Some of them let their eyes linger long enough to give her time to plot out the perfect murder strategy (it’s the only way she can stop herself from actually committing a crime tonight). And, as Azzi dances with Caroline, hips swaying to the beat and holding the other girl a little closely, Paige has the irrational urge to hit sweet, kind Caroline of all people.

The thing is, Azzi’s been a little too attached to Caroline since she got here in Paige’s opinion. And she gets it. Piath, bless her soul, is trying but has always been a little awkward around new people. Nika is definitely not trying, loyally holding onto a grudge on behalf of Paige. Which leaves Caroline, who’s already familiar territory and the younger girl has grasped onto her like a lifeline. But enough is enough Paige decides, as she slips out of her seat with a determined look. Smoothly, she cuts right in between Caroline and Azzi.

“Nika’s a little wasted and I don’t want to deal with,” it’s a blatant lie but Paige knows appealing to Caroline’s more motherly instincts will get her what she wants. She gets a raised eyebrow in return, her teammate clearly catching her ruse because Nika looks visibly fine. But it works anyway and Paige gets Azzi to herself. She reaches for the other girl’s hand, twirling her just so she can hear that stupid silly laugh, and then pulling her back so she’s facing Paige.

“You having fun?”

“Always have fun with you P,” Azzi replies. She’s clearly tipsy but there’s no hint of insincerity in her voice. It makes Paige’s breath hitch.

“Yeah?” she whispers, taking a step closer, “more than with Carol?”

Azzi giggles, “more than anyone.”

The song in the club changes and as the crowd adjusts to it, someone jostles Azzi and immediately Paige grabs at her hips to steady her. As she finds her balance, Azzi’s giggles subside, realising just how close she is to the blonde now. They’re stuck in slow motion as the world dances around them. The combination of adrenaline and alcohol pumping through her veins is what convinces Paige to test the limits. One hand still squeezing at Azzi’s bare waist, revelling in finally getting to touch, she brings up her thumb to trace around Azzi’s lips. The younger girl gulps, but when she doesn’t try to move away, confidence pulses through Paige. Her heart is beating frantically out of her chest, years and years of want and need that she’d shoved as far away as possible, desperately fighting to get to the surface.

Pushing herself closer, so their chests are now pressed to each other and Azzi’s hands have no choice but to latch onto her biceps, Paige places a delicate, teasing kiss to the corner of Azzi’s lips. She wishes she could record the whine it elicits and listen to it on loop for hours. Smirking, she moves to place another one on the other side, this time pressing her lips a little harder, a little longer. Azzi’s eyes are closed shut, hands gripping onto Paige so tightly, she knows there’ll be a mark on her biceps tomorrow. She cups Azzi’s face with both hands now, her own eyes shutting involuntarily, as she finally, finally brushes their lips together.

This time, the strangled noise that leaves Azzi’s throat, is one Paige wishes she could forget as the younger girl rips herself away from Paige, the force of it creating almost a foot of distance between them. It doesn’t take long for the familiar sting of rejection to make itself home in her heart. Azzi’s eyes are brimming with tears as she manically shakes her head. Without a word, she rushes through the crowd, making a beeline for the exit, leaving Paige confused and craving for another taste.

***

It takes Paige a second to gather her thoughts before following the brunette. She ignores the confused glances from her teammates, making some bullshit excuse about fresh air as she fights her way outside. When she gets there, Azzi’s leaning against the wall, eyes closed as she takes in long deep breaths.

“That’s not usually how girls react when I try to kiss them,” Paige says after a second, trying to make light of the situation, even if her heart is heavy with anxiety.

It’s the wrong thing to say because Azzi scoffs, “you kiss a lot of girls don’t you.”

“Yeah and most of them kiss me back,” Paige bites back.

She’s taken aback by the fire in the darker-skinned girl’s eyes as Azzi finally opens them, heaving herself off the wall.

“I won’t be one of your groupies Paige. I won’t be one of your desperate one night stands. I won’t be just some other hookup. I won’t!”

Frankly she’s a little offended Azzi would even think that of her. She’s aware of her reputation. In fact she’d probably fed into it a little bit, exaggerating her escapades to Azzi on the phone her freshman year, when they had been on the verge of combusing and she’d been desperate to get a rise out of the younger girl. Last year though, last year was different. But Azzi doesn’t know that.

“I don’t want you to be any of that,” she replies feebly.

“Then what, do you want me to be?” Azzi’s voice rises with each syllable.

Paige stutters, the words getting stuck in her throat. The truth is she wants Azzi to be everything. The truth is, Azzi already is everything. Except there’s too much between them and she just can’t say it. They stand in silence until Azzi finally breaks it.

“I think these last few weeks of summer might have been the best of my life,” she says miserably, “and that might be the worst thing ever you know? Because it’s not real. You’re gonna go back to your world and you’ll- you’ll stop replying to my texts and you’ll stop- you’ll stop calling me and I- I don’t know if I can do that again.”

“That’s an awful lot of assumptions you’re making about me,” Paige is on defensive mode now, feeling a fight brewing.

“Because that’s what happened. Go back through your fucking phone Paige. Look at all the times I tried. And all the times you never did. You just- you cut me out Paige.”

“That’s not fair. You chose fucking UCLA. Over me.”

“No,” Azzi corrects immediately, anger seeping into her tone, “I chose UCLA over UConn. You made it about yourself.”

Paige swallows back a bitter response in favour of trying to prevent a full-fledged argument, “okay, okay let’s not- let’s not do this okay. It’ll be better this time- I- I won’t ignore your calls or texts or you okay? Just- can we just go back inside please?”

“That’s the thing,” Azzi’s anger is gone, replaced by a sad wistful smile, “I don’t know if I believe that you will,” a single tear rolls down her cheek, “I- I don’t fully trust you and you haven’t fully forgiven me. So where do we go from here?”

It’s a lie what they say about the truth setting you free, Paige thinks as Azzi’s words squeeze at her heart, because all it’s done is unleash shackles of despair that holds them both hostage. It had been easy the last couple of weeks, to pretend the last year had never happened. It had been easy for Paige to pretend that she was over what happened, to ignore the part of her brain that still felt so utterly betrayed.

“Azzi, what are you saying? You don’t- you don’t wanna be friends?” Paige feels nauseous even saying it.

“No I-” Azzi chews at her bottom lip, “I’m saying this- us- we’re too fragile to complicate even more. I barely- fuck- Paige, I barely survived losing my best friend. I don’t think I could survive losing something more.”

The worst thing about it all, is that it makes sense. And really, Paige doesn’t know what she’d expected to happen if Azzi hadn’t pulled away when she did. They’d kiss, maybe give in and do more and then what? Shake hands and walk away? Or make false promises that would ultimately lead to resentment? No, Years and years of something deserved better than either of those masochistic endings. It makes sense, it does but it doesn’t mean Paige has to like it.

In front of her, all the fight evaporates from Azzi’s body, as the younger girl leans back against the brick wall of the club, sliding down and pulling her knees to her chest. She looks every bit as miserable as Paige feels and all the blonde wants to do is wipe away the stress lines creasing against the younger girl’s beautiful phase. She moves to sit down next to her best friend, shuffling so their shoulders are pressed together and intertwines their fingers together. A sigh of relief escapes her when Azzi doesn’t immediately pull away. Instead, she squeezes their hands tighter, as if she’s scared that if she lets go, Paige will disappear.

“You didn’t lose me you know,” Paige says softly after a second, nudging Azzi’s shoulder when the other girl lets out a noise of protest, “I know, I know it feels like you did. It felt like that to me too except- every time something good or bad happened to me, I heard your voice or- or maybe I just really wanted too. We got lost a little bit but I didn’t- I didn’t lose you and you didn’t lose me. There’s a difference. I don’t think we could ever lose each other like that. Not really.”

When Azzi turns to look at her, the golden glow of the street lights illuminate the emotions in her eyes. She gives Paige a soft smile, “well Bueckers, if basketball doesn’t work out, maybe you have a future in poetry.”

“I could do whatever I wanted,” except what I want to do the most.

It doesn’t take long for the Uber Azzi’s already called to start pulling up and that familiar ache of longing creeps into Paige’s spine. She knows tonight isn’t their final goodbye; they still have a couple more days. But those days will be spent ignoring and pretending, unlike tonight and the firm grip they have on reality. They rise off of the cold pavement together, dusting themselves off. It takes a second of awkward glances before they’re surging into each other’s arms, squeezing each other so tightly that it’s hard to breathe. Paige wills herself not to cry, hiding her face in the crook of Azzi’s neck.

“We’ll be okay,” she whispers, unsure if it’s more for her benefit or Azzi’s.

The unwanted beep of a car is the only reason they reluctantly pull away, hurriedly wiping away unshed tears, they pretend the other can’t see. Azzi musters up a brave smile, before slowly moving away and it takes everything in Paige not to crumble and begs her to stay. Azzi’s halfway to the car when she turns back and it feels like Paige can breathe again. The brunette’s face is conflicted for a second before turning determined, as she starts walking back up.

“Az-”

Paige’s confusion is stifled as Azzi fists her shirt, pulling her into a searing kiss. It’s desperate and needy and it’s only a few seconds before the dark-haired girl is pulling away again, but it sets Paige’s entire world off balance.

“I just-” Azzi’s breathing is rapid and uneven, “I’ve wanted to do that since I was fifteen and- just- fuck- I just-,” she blinks up at Paige, “I hate- I hate leaving things unfinished and for fucks sake if you don’t call me back this time Bueckers- just- don’t be a stranger.”

Paige doesn’t get time to answer, she doesn’t think she could even if she did, because Azzi scurries away almost immediately. She stops when she gets to the car, turning back to give Paige one final look, a look that will haunt Paige forever, before getting into the backseat. As Paige watches the back of Azzi’s uber gets smaller and smaller, her tongue darts across her lips as she tries to memorise the faintest taste of Azzi’s strawberry-flavoured lipstick. And she knows, she’s so utterly and completely and terribly fucked.

#pazzi #paige bueckers #azzi fudd #wcbb

144 notes · View notes

blessedwithabadomen · 2 months

Text

in love with the mess - day five

summary : Aubrey is going on tour and, for once, she's decided to focus on having as much fun as possible. Oli can be a little shit but he does nothing short of adore Audrey and... well, maybe Noah a little, too. Noah likes the flirting, as long as no one gets too close, emotionally. But what will happen when the three of them take it too far?

content : fluff, flirting, drinking, everyone gets a kiss

length : 4.2k

tags (let me know if you want to be tagged!) : @veronicaphoenix @cookiesupplier @lma1986 @jilliemiw86 @bngurngheart @lacktoesandtoddlerants @narcissisticbehavior81 @flowery-mess @shilohrosechicken @justeli6 @starvingarsyn @floatinglikeaswan @somebodyels3

a/n : here we go!! enjoy and feel free to comment, ask, reblog 💗

•••

day five

Something about the check-in at the hotel in Manchester was fishy and had caused a ridiculous amount of chaos that needed to be sorted out by the tour managers. I made the best of the situation and got comfortable in the lobby with my laptop, determined to get some work done ahead of time. Lia was going to be here in just a few hours and I'd promised her to free my schedule as much as possible.

Plus, I knew we would be drinking, so the ride to Glasgow tomorrow was going to be spent regretting my hangover and lying in my bunk, not doing hours of work.

The only strange thing about the day so far was that I had seen neither Oli nor Noah. Noah’s absence was to be expected to a certain extent; he was in a different band, on a different bus, with slightly deviating schedules, so the chances of running into each other could be quite low. I hadn't gotten a message from him either though. At least rumour had been going around that he woke up as good as new this morning, whatever had been beating him down yesterday had vanished completely. Oli was more surprising considering he was consistently put into an adjacent hotel room, travelled in the same tour bus and technically employed me.

Funnily enough, the question about the two missing frontmen was answered sooner than the check-in chaos got resolved. I heard the two of them entering the lobby together before I saw them. Pushing each other away, both seemed eager to get to me first as soon as they spotted me, stealing a bag from each other's hands over and over again.

“Fucking stop, I’m the one who knew to get this for her,” Oli complained, trying to keep the paper bag out of Noah’s reach, who was quicker than him and caught it behind Oli’s back.

“Yeah, and I’m the one who’s gonna give it to her!”

“Give it back, you wanker!”

Their fight came to an abrupt end as they stood in front of me looking up at them over my laptop.

“I got you something,” Oli explained, motioning to the bag.

“We got you something,” Noah corrected.

“Just because you walked next to me, doesn’t mean you had anything to do with it!”

I felt another bout of their little spat coming on, so I quickly intervened and stole the bag from Noah’s hands. Both of them quieted down immediately, watching me as I opened it up. The sweet scent of pastries filled my nostrils immediately.

“Are these…?” I didn’t finish my question as I brought the baked good to my nose, inhaling it deeply once again before taking a hearty bite ouf of its flakey goodness. I didn't know how Oli new. I couldn't remember if I'd ever told him and if I had, I was sure it was in passing only. The fact that he not only was aware of my sweet tooth but also went out of his way to satisfy it with my favourite goods caused my stomach to flip. “Thank you so much, that’s so sweet.”

“From your favourite bakery,” Oli proudly agreed. “You said you weren’t in Manchester that often and- well, I thought after yesterday-”

“Wait, what happened yesterday?”

Suddenly, Noah was all ears. I was much too preoccupied with the best thing I’d tasted in months to think about how to explain. Oli had mentioned it, Oli could solve the situation.

“Aubrey was in a right mood last night,” Oli said with grin. “A little brat.”

I almost choked on my pastry, a few flakes flying away from me as I got my breathing back under control. I shouldn’t have been so surprised. Oli was hardly known for being a prude about these things.

“And I went to sleep instead,” Noah groaned, sounding genuinely remorseful. Our eyes met for a moment. Somehow, I knew we were both remembering last night, too, me bringing him back to the hotel room, him warning me off. He looked away first, as if a little embarrassed. I wasn’t sure what to do with it.

“I’m sure you’ll find out for yourself soon enough,” it burst out of me. But I’d already learned that the combination of us three left very little room to hold back in that aspect.

Oli leaned down to me, his thumb wiping at the corner of my mouth where some chocolate had seemingly gotten stuck. He tapped my lips. It was enough for me to dumbly open my mouth and suck it in, twirling my tongue around it to get another taste. He chuckled darkly, satisfied how easily I went along with him, before pulling away, finding another bit of chocolate to swipe away, this time offering his thumb to Noah.

He was torn. Quite visibly so. The tension hung in the air as he tried to decide on which move to make now, all three of us basically holding our breaths to see what would transpire.

Then, some loud laughter from the crew erupted somewhere else in the lobby, loud enough to pull him out of it. He actually shook his head, as if that could make the thoughts disappear.

“Fuck you, Oli,” he muttered, without much force behind it.

“Yeah,” Oli laughed, licking the chocolate of his thumb himself, “I bet you’d like to.”

•••

Whoever said that time flies when you’re having fun had never felt time slipping through your fingers when you were desperately trying to get your boss to get to all things in his agenda on time while he was being an absolute arse for no reason but to amuse himself. On top of that, your best friend was blowing up your phone in excitement of getting to see you, effectively starting a countdown that only served to distract you from the work you should be doing.

By seven o’clock, I was thoroughly exhausted and annoyed. At some point, Noah had even pulled me aside to give me a much needed hug, although it had been cut short by Lia announcing her imminent arrival. Luckily, Lia did what she did best and that was raise my mood impossibly the very second I saw her.

Her arms around me felt like home. She was the only anchor I felt I still had, while I was always trying to never get too settled in one place with my work taking me all over, but we’d been friends since childhood and she’d always refused to budge. I didn’t thank her for it enough.

“Okay, catch me up asap, what’s been happening, what’s been going down, have you managed to bang anyone yet?”

I shot an apologetic smile at the two stagehands walking past as I walked down the corridor with Lia, an AAA pass hung around her neck and so excited that I wondered if she’d had a drink before coming here. With a slightly quicker step, I dragged her into Oli’s dressing room, aware he was currently hanging out with the rest of his band.

“Well, there’s been no fucking, but…”

I awkwardly started tidying up the dressing room. It came as second nature, really, trying to make sure things were in order, helping Oli out for later, not letting him drown in his chaos. I busied myself with a hoodie that I decided needed folding.

“But?! Aubrey, you’re not seriously gonna leave me starved for information here!”

“I mean, I did make out with Noah and I’ve seen Oli’s dick, so…”

Her squealing, I was pretty sure, could be heard next door and I couldn’t help but laugh. Lia was nothing if not supportive of basically anything I did.

I gave her a quick rundown of the last few days, keeping some of the details to myself while still letting her know what I’d been up to, including just about every endeavour I’d found myself in with the guys. She did nothing short of react appropriately, aw-ing and ooh-in and gasping and laughing. I’d missed having her around.

In the middle of me letting Lia know that, yes, I most definitely got cleaned up after last night’s escapade and, no, Oli and I hadn’t spoken about it yet and also, no, I didn’t think Noah knew, when the door to the dressing room flew open and revealed Oli himself.

“Speak of the devil,” Lia mused and I briefly panicked about her letting Oli know just what we were talking about, even though I knew fully well she would never betray me like that.

“I could say the same about you,” Oli replied, attempting to sound cruel but unable to hide the smile on his face.

“Why on earth would you have been talking about me?”

“Oh, I wasn’t. I was referring to the part where you are the devil.”

“Oh, you bastard!” Lia exclaimed with a laugh. “You coming out with us after the show?”

“Hell no. We got an early bus call and a four-hour drive to Glasgow. And I know what you get up to, Lia.”

My heart sank a little, even though I knew Oli was only being reasonable. We did only have a few hours in the hotel before we needed to get going again. I was going to be fine, really - I planned on not getting blackout drunk and there wasn’t too much left for me to do tomorrow that I hadn’t already taken care of. Plus, I wasn’t the one who had to be up on stage that night delivering the show of their life.

“Fucking party pooper.”

“I’m so much of a party pooper that I specifically came to get you two because Bad Omens are about to start. Managed to organise some wine for you too. Good enough?”

“Just about,” Lia mused, standing up and walking past him and out of the room with the confidence only someone who had on idea which way the stage was could have. We both looked at her leave, overly amused, until I remembered she was my friend and I should probably make sure she wouldn’t get completely lost.

Oli stopped me at the door. “You gonna stop by when you get back tonight?”

“I could just text you that I got back safe, you know. It might get late.”

He slung his arm around my waist, pulling me into a side hug, a telling smirk playing on his lips. “I’ll gladly wake up for you.”

•••

I wasn’t quite sure how we ended up in Oli’s suite - a suite! Motherfucker had a suite all to himself! - playing questionable drinking games (Truth or dare? Never have I ever? 21 questions? Honestly, it was hard to tell at this point) way past midnight and maybe it was because I was a little intoxicated - not drunk, I was still aware I had a bus ride in just a few hours - but I was tipsy enough not to question it just yet.

The evening had gone something like this: Oli had, in fact, organised two bottles of wine and exclusive seats for us during the show. Lia was blown away by Bad Omens and the way Noah sang and how she couldn’t blame me at all for crushing on him. Then, Lia followed it up by being blown away by Bring Me The Horizon and their production and the Oli’s stage presence and the fact that I had somehow not banged him yet. Especially when he effectively climbed his videographer. Didn't help with the thoughts in my head either. Both of those bottles were killed by the time the show was over.

We had briefly ventured out to Lia’s favourite bar for a few shots, but had quickly realised that talking about Oli and Noah in a crowded place full of people who had just left the very concert they had performed at, wasn’t the wisest decision. So, with some more alcohol in tow, Lia had stolen my phone and texted the two men and somehow, somehow convinced them to join us for a little afterparty. Now all of us were feeling the buzz and going along with Lia’s questionable ideas.

“Worst place you’ve ever vomited?”

“Just about every single time it happened on stage, and love, it happened,” Oli laughed. Those had been the bad times. I didn’t miss them at all. I’d trade them for this version of Oli, happy, healthy, optimistic, flirty, bloody gorgeous any day.

“Alright. No need to get into that. Noah, empty your wallet and show everyone what’s inside.”

Noah didn’t hesitate, grabbing the item from the back pocket of his trousers and emptying its contents. There wasn’t too much interesting stuff in there - ID, a credit card, some loose change in more than one currency. Lia grabbed onto the condom wrappers immediately. Three of them.

“Ultra thin, extra lube, ribbed,” she read aloud. “Damn, someone knows how to treat their partners.”

Noah blushed a little under the redness that the alcohol had already flushed his cheeks with. I was pretty sure I did the same, my mind running away with thoughts. This was good. He quickly gathered them up again and stowed them away but I didn’t think he missed the way Oli raised his eyebrows at him. Surprise enough that he didn’t say anything.

“Aubrey, who would you like to kiss in this room?”

“Who wouldn’t I like to kiss!” I giggled, taking another sip of wine, even though it was starting to get to my head. Obviously.

“Well, me, hopefully, or you’ll have to deal with my wife,” Lia laughed, holding up the wedding ring on her finger. “Anyway. What caused your last relationship to break down?”

She didn’t aim the question at anyone in particular, but Noah, sweet, closed-off Noah, suddenly had an intense urge to answer.

“What didn't,” he groaned, throwing his had back and cradling the bottle in his hands. “Touring, the distance, the groupies that don’t exist, the missed phone calls, the not being enough.” He threw his hands in the air in defeat. I thought it was the most he had revealed about himself, like, ever. “And here comes the kicker. I was talking about proposing to her with the guys and looking up rings the very morning of the day she broke up with me.”

Silence engulfed us. A comment from Folio, just a few days ago, and Noah’s very unamused answer was whirling in my head, but I was too intoxicated to make perfect sense of it right now. I just knew there was a connection.

I didn’t know if telling him I was sorry would cut it. Bit of a big deal, really, finding someone to marry who drops you like that. What do you say to that? Luckily, good old Oli jumped in pretty much immediately.

“Emotionally unavailable and obsessed with myself,” he said. “Pretty sure that’s a direct quote, too. Probably not too wrong about it either.”

Apparently we were sharing break-up stories now. My turn, I decided.

“Told her that, very theoretically, mind, I would be open to polyarmory. Because, you know, I definitely think you can be in love with more than one person. And if everyone’s happy, I’m sure there’s something great about relationships that aren’t just two people. Well,” I mused, throwing back another sip of wine to keep myself going, spilling a little on my top, “all she heard was ‘this is an open relationship without any rules now’ and went and banged someone else the next day.”

The three of us looked each other, throwing pitiful looks around, realising we were all pretty fucked up in our own ways, and suddenly broke out laughing. It almost took my breath away, the intensity of the relief of sharing these little things with people so dear to me, letting them understand me a little better, understanding them a little better in return and oh god more wine on me. These jeans would have to go straight into the washing.

“Enough tearjerker stories,” Lia announced, but there was no malice in her words. “Let’s get back to the fun questions! Worst sex experience! Oli, please, I want to hear yours.”

“Alright, first one that comes to mind right now, couple of years ago, right, I hook up with this girl, all fun and games, but it’s very fucking tame, you know? And out of nowhere she just fucking chokes me. I’m not saying I don’t like it, but that proper came out of fucking nowhere. Like. Normally, you’d ease up to it, if you hadn’t talked about it.”

Suddenly, Oli seemed to be sitting much closer to Noah than before. I wasn’t sure if it was my imagination. Or the light.

“You’d have your hands on them somewhere,” Oli explained, drawing out his words, as his hand landed on Noah’s chest. He was caught off guard for a moment, but silently allowed the moment to play out. “Slowly move them up, see if they enjoy it.”

Oli followed through. Noah was definitely enjoying it. I was transfixed on the display in front of me.

“Get a little skin-on-skin contact.”

His fingers were tracing the line where Noah’s shirt ended, just letting his fingertips play with the hem a little. I’d never seen Oli so gentle, but it was doing things to my body. Noah’s breathing was speeding up now, chest heaving, unable to keep it hidden. I couldn’t blame him at all.

“See how they react to your hand being closer to their throat.”

Oli’s hand moved higher, carefully stroking the skin at Noah’s neck. Noah swallowed, hard, his eyelids fluttering shut. It was as if he was loosing all control over his bodily reactions. It was intoxicating to watch.

“And maybe, you know, if they don’t move away or move your hand, you can give it a try.”

And Oli did. Wrapping his hand around Noah’s throat and squeezing a little. Just the slightest bit. Just the possibility of more. And Noah moaned.

“And that’s my cue to get myself on an uber home!” Lia declared loudly, standing up and just about catching the wine bottle that had been in her lap before it toppled over onto the carpet. She was swaying a little, quite obviously the most drunk out of the four of us and I quickly made the executive decision to accompany her downstairs and wait with her. Oli gave me a nod, a satisfied smirk on his face. Noah didn’t look at me at all, but he seemed to be questioning all his life choices.

“Girl! What’s going on between the two of them? I knew you were developing… something with both of them, you didn’t tell me about the two of them with each other!”

I awkwardly fumbled with Oli’s room key as we descended on the lift. “I don’t think they know either.”

“But, do you mind?”

I looked at her, thoughtful for a moment, almost missing the time frame to leave the lift as it arrived in the lobby. Did I mind?

“No,” I answered, without giving it any further thought, just knowing. “No, I really don’t.”

“That’s what I wanted to hear,” Lia giggled, giving me a hug so enthusiastically it almost toppled us over. “Now go, go and get them together and then get them both for yourself.”

•••

I didn’t knock when I used the key card to get back into Oli’s room. It shouldn’t have come as a surprise that I was going to be back - not only had I actively snatched the card from the desk but I had also left all my stuff in there. Still, none of us had seen the situation coming, apparently.

The first thing I saw when I entered the room was that neither Oli nor Noah were still sitting on the couch. The second thing I saw was that Oli had pressed Noah against the wall instead.

They didn’t notice me immediately, too caught up in their own world as Oli frantically pressed his lips to Noah’s. Entangled as if they simply couldn’t get close enough, one of Oli’s hands was in Noah’s hair, keeping him in place, keeping him complacent, the other running up the outside of his thigh, as Noah was pawing at Oli’s back, as if not sure what his hands were looking for, but trying all the same. My heart fluttered with… love? The door falling shut behind me caught their attention.

They didn’t jump apart. In fact, their hands were still exactly where they had left them. But both of them had turned their heads so fast it looked painful.

“Don’t stop on my account,” I grinned. “I’m very much enjoying this.”

Noah was visibly shaken up and out of breath and I wondered if that was what happened to people who got to kiss Oli Sykes, but Oli himself was in the best of moods.

“See, I heard that you went and kissed our Noah here,” he explained, slowly detaching himself from him. Noah’s body almost followed on its own account, seemingly not having enough of the other man just yet. “And I got really, really jealous. But now I’m realising that means he got to kiss you, too.”

“There’s really no need to be jealous, at all,” I replied, letting him come closer and closer, just to push him back onto the couch. Straddling his lap, my thighs on either side of his, was a logical conclusion. “You can kiss me anytime.”

There was a hint of hesitation. Something familiar in his eyes, something like home. A decade-long friendship that was begging to be ruined. I knew he saw the same in me. We’d done things with each other, things to each other, that went beyond any regular friendship. But this moment, this temptation of finally getting his mouth on mine, a kiss, felt like it weighed so much more heavily on both of us.

His hands landed on my thighs, moving up to the small of my back, giving me security and safety and all rationality be damned, I leaned down and allowed my lips to touch his.

A shockwave travelled through every inch of my being, then the tension evaporated, as if this was where I'd always meant to be. Oli was soft and pliant under me, a stark contrast to how he usually presented himself, to how he usually behaved around me even, but I indulged in the feeling, grabbing onto his arms to make them wrap around me, letting him hold me close, tightly. I couldn't stop my own hands from tracing along his torso, his neck, his face, silently mapping his body in a way I had never been allowed to before. When his tongue licked against my lips, I let him in.

The kiss became more frantic as I lost all self-control. Years and years of unfulfilled desires poured into us as I pressed myself into him. Oli tasted sweet, so much sweeter than expected, even with the beer still lingering. I could feel myself falling, deeper and deeper, like a feral animal willingly setting foot into a trap, the temptation of the bait calling too loudly to ignore.

I noticed the couch dip before my brain realised Noah was next to us. Then his hand was at the back of my head, gripping my hair and pulling me off Oli. Instantly, he had me turned toward him, Oli’s hands still on me, my body still on his lap, but now my lips were crashing into Noah’s. It was electrifying, his frantic kiss, how his lust must have built as he watched us. Oli’s mouth now at my neck, licking along my tendon, finishing it off with a soft bite.

Noah swallowed my moans easily, still holding me in place, still roughly moving my head to his own wishes. Oli was grinding up into me, his hard dick against my core making me squirm even through the layers, thoughts of what it had looked like, what he had looked like overwhelming my mind. When Noah let go of me it felt so sudden that I almost lost my balance, hands trying to find the couch table behind me as a way to steady myself. The dull noise of a bottle hitting the carpeted floor had all three of us halt in our movements.

The wine ended up on the carpet after all, like a bad metaphor for whatever the three of us had just started and might be unable to stop.

I got up from Oli’s lap, Noah also standing up as if he suddenly didn’t know where he was supposed to be anymore. The awkwardness in the room was tangible, the lines we had just crossed almost becoming visible in my mind as my tipsy brain struggled to make sense of the consequences.

When Noah and I announced our separate departures, Oli didn’t say a word, still staring at the dark red colour seeping into the plush beneath his feet. Both of us went in opposite directions in the hallway. I didn’t know if that was supposed to be a metaphor too.

#Noah Sebastian fic #Noah Sebastian #Oli Sykes fic #Oli Sykes #Noah Sebastian x reader #Oli Sykes x reader #in love with the mess

92 notes · View notes

fairlyang · 4 months

Text

Bad idea right? 🕷️

bad idea right? by olivia rodrigo but it's you being down bad for your ex

w/c: 2.6K

pairing: exbf!miguel x drunkfem!reader

tags: 18+ smut. mention of being drunk. can't help but miss him, he lives rent free in ur head, down horrendous for him, making out, fingering, only reader orgasm

Oh, hey

Haven't heard from you in a couple of months

But I'm out right now and I'm all fucked up

And you're callin' my phone, you're all alone

And I'm sensin' some undertone

And I'm right here with all my friends

But you're sendin' me your new address

And I know we're done, I know we're through

I was at the club with my friends getting drunk off a our minds like we usually do, when I get a phone call. We were sitting in a circular booth so I had Ryan by my left and Val to my right and both of them peered over my shoulder as I grabbed my phone.

We all gasped at the caller ID and they immediately tried to snatch my phone from me, I quickly pulled it down and put it between my thighs making sure to squeeze them tightly so they can't get it. "Bitch do not answer that call-" I hear Ryan say before I moved.

I grab my phone and get under the table as I hear their screams at me while I crawl away then stand up at the end of the table waving my phone, "NO!"

I answer and put the phone to my ear to hear his all too familiar voice, "Hey... I'm all alone and was hoping you could slide by.."

I bite my lip and feel my heart race at his tone, so husky and giving me the exact implication I'd expect after months of not talking. "I'm down." I respond almost immediately letting drunk me take control of my brain.

"I'll send you the address." He murmurs and then hangs up.

I sigh dreamily then look at my phone as a message came in from Miguel. The snap of a finger caught my attention as I look down at all three of my friends giving me crazy eyes. "You are not going-"

I sit down next to Val and lean my head against her shoulder as I pull up his insta and look at his pictures. "Ugh but how could I not-" I whine and show them the most recent set of pictures he's posted.

"Bitch it's been literal months-" Ella sneers shaking her head in disappointment.

"So....? I know we're done but that doesn't mean we can't fu-" I start to say as I look up at Ryan and Ella both shaking their head, "you guys are broken up!"

I roll my eyes and look down at my phone taking a closer look at the pictures of Miguel as my friends groan and Val wraps an arm around me, shaking me, "you're gonna regret it."

But, God, when I look at you

My brain goes, "Ah"

Can't hear my thoughts (I cannot hear my thoughts)

Like blah-blah-blah (blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah)

Should probably

(I should probably, probably not)

I shrug and admire the way his lips were curled into a pretty smile and his dimples were out, so pretty. The sparkle in his eyes making me melt and make the butterflies reappear in my stomach like old times.

I scroll through the rest of the pictures that consisted of selfies and mirror pics with his friends. My heart skips a beat when I see him wearing the navy blue button up I always loved seeing him wear. Fuck he's so handsome... so fucking fine...

And the way his voice sounded, god I could never grow sick of it.

Seein' you tonight

It's a bad idea, right?

Seein' you tonight

It's a bad idea, right?

Seein' you tonight

It's a bad idea, right?

Seein' you tonight

Hmm maybe it is a bad idea.... I mean everyone knows what happens if you hook up with your ex after months of no contact..

It won't be the end and will just be an endless cycle of calling each other, hooking up and potentially getting back together just forgetting why you broke up in the first place.

Do I really want that?

Fuck it, it's fine

Yes, I know that he's my ex

But can't two people reconnect?

I only see him as a friend

(The biggest lie I ever said)

I shake those thoughts away and grin, fuck it, it'll be fine.

"Shouldn't it be fine if two people just reconnect?" I ask and they all say "no" at the same time.

I groan, shaking my head looking at them in disbelief, "I only see him as a friend..." I lie and Ryan immediately bursts out laughing.

Oh, yes, I know that he's my ex

But can't two people reconnect?

I only see him as a friend

(I just tripped and fell into his bed)

"What?!?" I exclaim and throw my hands up.

"You do not see him as a friend-" Val cuts in and I shake my head.

"Bitch be serious for one second-" Ryan says but I cut him off, "You're all wrong!" I say when a hiccup leaves my mouth.

"You're literally drunk-" Ella says and I wave her off.

"I'm fine-"

Another hiccup.

"Alright I'll catch you guys tomorrow-" I say and stand up.

"Bitch stop you gotta really think about this-" Ryan starts but I lift a finger up and look up pretending to think, "I've thought about it...... Bye!" I say then wave goodbye as I walk to the exit hearing their shouts at me.

I open the doors and walk out feeling the cold breeze as I walk over to the parking lot. I quickly get an Uber and try to wait as patiently as I can, pacing back and forth along the sidewalk, waiting.

Now I'm gettin' in the car, wreckin' all my plans

I know I should stop, but I can't

And I told my friends I was asleep

But I never said where, in his sheets

And I pull up to your place, on the second floor

And you're standin', smiling at the door

And I'm sure I've seen much hotter men

But I really can't remember when

I see the designated car I got and quickly hop before opening Miguel's text and telling the driver the address.

He nods and starts heading there as I put on my seat belt and sigh in relief. I'm finally seeing him.

I feel a buzz from my phone and I quickly open it but groan when I see it's texts from the groupchat.

Ryan🤞🏼

I'm beating your ass tmrw

Val💅🏼

Please be safe

Ella🫶🏼

Bitch where are you

I giggle and roll my eyes, quickly typing.

What a variety...

Y/n

Going to sleep😴

I send then put my phone on dnd knowing they'll do anything to try and stop me.

I go through my archived on my insta and look through all the posts I had of Miguel and I when we were together. We were so good together. So perfect. Two peas in a pod. Yin and Yang. The apple to my eye. Whatever the fuck that meant.

I sigh and lean against the window looking out as it started to drizzle. I felt my eyes closing but I tried my best to stay awake, of all times being drunk right now would be the one time I get sleepy?

So fucked up.

The rest of the drive was a blur but i automatically paid from the app and stumbled out of the car and walked towards his new apartment.

I go through the door and then walk towards the stairs holding on to the railing because I didn't trust myself to go up steadily. I get to the top of the stairs, making it to the second floor and walk onto the hallway. I pull my dress down then fix the straps when I see a door a couple feet away open and there he was.

I tried my hardest not to smile immediately but I got closer I noticed he was the one that had a smile on his face. It sent a shiver down my spine as I walked towards him suddenly feeling nervous but the excitement rising with every step.

I feel like I've seen hotter men since we broke up but couldn't think of when or where, and didn't care to because I had him now right in front of me.

My brain goes, "Ah"

Can't hear my thoughts (I cannot hear my thoughts)

Like blah-blah-blah (blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah)

Should probably

(I should probably, probably not)

My mind was going wild, heart started racing as I checked him out. Wearing a white tee and god those grey sweatpants....

I felt my breath hitch in my throat and i felt like I was going to melt just at the sight of him. I couldn't help still feeling this way towards him, I always tried to push my thoughts away whenever I thought of him but I really couldn't help that he lived rent free in my head all these months.

So of course I was going to jump at the opportunity of being with him again. In whatever way he pleased.

Seein' you tonight

It's a bad idea, right?

Seein' you tonight

It's a bad idea, right?

Seein' you tonight

It's a bad idea, right?

Seein' you tonight

"Hey." I breathe out and give him a drunken smile.

"This is a bad idea isn't it?" I say looking into his eyes praying he doesn't agree with me.

He chuckles and shrugs, "maybe..."

I was contemplating really going in, going through with this. If I do through that door I'll be stuck to him and won't be able to leave his side. I'll be glued to him and will continue to come back here.

"Well maybe it is." He mumbles looking down at my body.

I bite my lip and feel a whirlwind of emotions but the most powering one being arousal. He just looked so good.

Fuck it, it's fine

Yes, I know that he's my ex

But can't two people reconnect?

I only see him as a friend

(The biggest lie I ever said)

Fuck it.

I take a step forward and smash my lips onto his immediately wrapping my arms behind his neck as I feel his trail down to my waist. He kissed me back instantly and makes us take a few steps back to go into his apartment.

I feel one hand get off me to close the door then it's back but playing with the ends of my hair as he moves us back.

He pulls away, leaving my lips lightly shivering, quickly leading us towards his bedroom.

Oh, yes, I know that he's my ex

But can't two people reconnect?

I only see him as a friend

(I just tripped and fell into his bed)

He closes the door and connects our lips together again, I kiss him in the neediest manner ever as he leans down making me sit on his bed. His hands go to my thighs, lightly squeezing as he bites my bottom lip then slides his tongue into my mouth.

I moan in his mouth and move my body back as I felt his hands on my lower back helping me scoot up his bed while he went down and was now hovering over me. I let his tongue explore my mouth while I tug on the ends of his curls and wrapping my legs around his waist bringing him even closer to me.

He pulls away and leaves a kiss on my cheek, then my jaw until finally goes down to my neck. Leaving open-mouthed kisses leaving me breathless and a moaning mess beneath him.

Oh, yes, I know that he's my ex

"We're still exes." I breathe out and let my head sink in into his pillow, arching my back because of the pleasure.

He hums against my skin, then sucks on his favorite spot before leaving kisses on it. I let out a shaky breath and feel my eyes flutter, I've missed him. All of him.

Can't two people reconnect?

"We're only reconnecting." I murmur and buck my hips up to have some friction, feel anything.

He groans and grinds his hips against mine making us both moan. "Fuck." He moans out and continues doing it but now faster and directly against my soaked pussy as my dress was ridden up to my thighs.

(The biggest lie I ever said)

Even deep down I knew this was going to end bad, but it was far too late. Well I mean I could just pull away right now?

Yeah right....

(I just tripped and fell into his bed)

"Such a bad idea." He murmurs against my neck making me giggle.

"Too late now." I purr and smile as he leans in to kiss me again but with more passion, need, hunger.

My brain goes, "Ah"

Can't hear my thoughts

I kiss back with the same intensity slowly feeling his hands go down my body, first groping my tits over my dress then trailing down my stomach. He immediately went down between my thighs and rubbed circles on my sensitive clit making me gasp against his mouth. "Miguel." I cry out but he slides his tongue in my mouth quickly shutting me up and making me melt into his touch.

(The biggest lie I ever said)

"Please-" I plead when he pulls away to kiss my neck again.

"Already so wet baby." He mocks, moving my panties to the side then slides two fingers between my folds leaving me a breathless, desperate mess.

My brain goes, "Ah"

I felt like I blanked out because suddenly he was pumping his fingers into me murmuring sweet nothings into my ears while I let out whimpers and moans, "faster."

"Patience baby." He says and pecks my lips as I felt my body shaking, just needing him to fuck me faster.

Can't hear my thoughts

I move my hands to his back, lightly scratching, trailing up and down, caressing his shoulders. "Please- I need you Miguel, I need you to make me feel good. You're the only one who can- fuck-!" I moan out then scream, scratching his back with my nails.

(I just tripped and fell into his bed)

He moved his fingers faster and started curling them up almost hitting the spot that always had me reaching me orgasm fast. I felt myself clench around his fingers making him moan as the sounds of my slickness filled my ears. "You've missed me then huh mami?" He whispers in my ear making me whimper and nod.

Thoughts

Blah

Thoughts

Blah

I let out bundles of whimpers as I felt my orgasm quickly approaching, the all too familiar feeling rising in my lower abdomen. "Yes- yes I have." I moan out and move my hips as he went faster.

His fingers finally hit the spot repeatedly making me quickly reach my orgasm, "shit Miguel!!" I whimper as I come undone beneath him.

My whole body shook and I still felt my body shaking as he was slowing down, my breathing was calming down and I felt my eyes fluttering. Holy fuck.

"You did so good baby." He murmurs and leans in to kiss me softly.

I kiss him back moving my hands up to cup his face when I felt his fingers slip out. I felt my wetness drip down to my asshole and my legs continued to shake. I was speechless, I didn't think I'd cum that hard let alone have it be by him. He pulls away and brings his fingers to his lips, licking off every drop of my juices. "Mmm and you taste just as good." He moans out making me squeeze my thighs together.

"Nuh uh, spread them for me. I'm not done with you yet." He says making my eyes go wide as his brings his hands down to spread my legs for me.

#miguel ohara #miguel ohara imagine #across the spiderverse #miguel ohara fic #miguel ohara x y/n #miguel o hara #miguel o’hara smut #atsv miguel #miguel ohara x you #miguel o’hara x reader #miguel o'hara #spiderman 2099 #miguel ohara smut #miguel o’hara fic #miguel o’hara x you #miguel o’hara x y/n #Spotify

119 notes · View notes

princessamericachavez · 1 year

Text

I still can’t believe how unhinged the couch thing is.

In s5 we see that Taylor brings her couch into the loft even though Buck has one and they have a problem from the get go because both couches (aka their personalities, their lives, their wants) do not fit in at the same time. They are both too attached to their own individual lives and goals to actually share a life. There’s no space for both of them in that home.

Ok anyway moving on Taylor is gone and we have an empty space where she forced her couch into Buck’s space.

Anyway, my point is: 6x1 we have the whole couch conversation and it’s always been such an OBVIOUS metaphor for Buck and Eddie’s relationship that it drives me insane.

“You know, I think it’s weird that he’s struggling to pick a replacement when he has so many excellent options right under his nose.”

“Like you?”

“It’s like he’s choosing not to see them and everything they have to offer.”

In the same season where we now know that Eddie will be exploring his dating options and going out with other people?????? Are you kidding me???????????

Buck saying this while he cooks for Eddie and Chris???? While he offers food and comfort??? In a show that has consistently utilized cooking and feeding others as a clear metaphor for love and family?!?!

And they even hammer it in again!!!

“What are you offering?”

“Right now, Bobby’s famous lasagna.”

I need to talk about thisssss. Because not only have we been presented with the idea of food as love and nurturing but also cooking as personal growth, about learning to nurture yourself and others and getting out of the darkness. Think about Bobby after joining the 118. But also think about Maddie being impressed by Buck “growing up” represented by Buck having learned cooking skills from Bobby. Think about Eddie going to therapy and swapping recipes with Linda and learning to be better and look after himself after getting chewed off by his dad for burning breakfast for his mom and sisters.

What Buck is offering is his own growth as a person. Is saying “I’ve put myself back together”. It’s saying “I’ve been working on myself for five years to become a better man”. It’s saying “it’s taken me several tries but I’m finally getting there.”

And of course after all that it’s when we go fully into the couch metaphor. It’s hard to say much about this dialogue that hasn’t been said before, but mostly I want to highlight that, for Buck, this metaphor is tightly tied to romantic relationships. “My last two couches came with girlfriends” and “maybe I don’t want to pick the wrong couch again”. But it’s also the fact that Buck picks his chair to take the couch’s spot for now. That is Buck. Buck being single.

The whole metaphor could’ve simply been about Buck realizing he doesn’t need a relationship to define him and who he is and that he should choose his own path and create a space in his home for himself. But if that was the case he would’ve just bought a couch for himself. The single chair represents his single path at the moment. The couch will be a romantic metaphor.

All of this to say that it’s absolutely unhinged that this is the last shot of Eddie we see in 6a.

And this comes after a) Buck called to give them the baby news, b) Eddie looked less than pleased at the reveal, c) Eddie hung up saying he was gonna try to get some sleep before taking Chris to school.

Except we see him drop the controller here. So he clearly kept playing. Even though he looked quite frustrated there. Fighting with himself. Anyway clearly something was bothering him.

What’s insane to me is that we cut immediately from this shot to Buck sleeping and the whole baby onesie shot. And I don’t think it could be any more obvious that we are meant to connect these two dots. Especially when we see them in the same montage as Henren and Maddnie sleeping together on their respective beds. And we know Buck’s whole donor thing was partly motivated by other things, like his need to be useful to others and save everyone, but also his eternal search for family and perhaps a call to fatherhood (even though he’s clearly not struggling with separating the idea as everyone expected).

Anyway, I do think having Eddie sleep on his couch rather than his bed was certainly A CHOICE. and it feels even more obvious when we know what happens in 6b.

I love that the Buckley’s brought up Buck’s lack of couch an episode before. HEY REMEMBER THIS? And it’s so much A Thing that we see that even Maddie gets it.

Which is so important considering the very. next. episode. we are going to get the most obvious callback to this metaphor in the shape of Buck finally finding rest and peace at Eddie’s couch?!?!?!

THEY ARE SO UNHINGED FOR THIS

And then they go as far as to have Buck point out “how did I pass out so fast?”

Like boyyyyyy you’re this 🤏🏽 close to figuring it out!!!!!!!

Anyway I cannot WAIT to see how they bring it up again and how Margaret’s couch finds its demise and especially knowing Buck’s very last scene of the season will touch back on the metaphor.

It will be so insane if they actually pull this off!!!!!!!

#buddie #Evan buck Buckley #911 fox #Eddie Diaz #911 spec

420 notes · View notes

bronx-bomber87 · 1 month

Text

Good evening wonderful fandom! SO glad to have a new ep to do some quick thoughts on. I missed our babies. As stated few weeks back the gif library is a turd right after an ep. So quick hand made ones till summer. Off we go.

6x04 Training Day

Lucy saying she’s fine as she consistently does all her fidgety tells screaming she is anything but LOL Tim picking this up too love it. Smart man saying what he does about “being fine.” They cute with her saying 'Does he want her to be upset?' He's so good at making her laugh in this moments. Makes my heart happy. Till John appears.... Way to jump in on their moment Nolan. Of course the man makes it worse…She was laughing before you got there John…Tim's face when she takes off. Like if I could punch you Nolan...

Oh Lucy... Definitely hitting her hard she’s still a patrol officer. Tasks that didn't used to bother her as much are. Ugh my girl. This is rough. You are anything but fine my friend…Poor Lucy last thing she needs is more alone time with her thoughts at a scene that'll take forever to wrap up. Not only that but babysitting puke…I think our girl is headed toward quite spiral that has yet to happen. Tim is gonna do his best to keep her sane but I have a gut feeling we are headed there. I could be wrong but just how I'm feeling.

Lucy killing me softly watching Juarez and Nolan get recognized on Tv. Mmm I am loving Tim coming to pick her up yum yum. Lucy mentioning almost getting that call... Damn nothing going her way today. Or lately... Think her only sanity at this point is that man next to her. Tim of course is picking up on it immediately knowing her mood is linked to Primm. Knows his girl so well. Stating she was hoping could've proved him wrong with catching a call like that.

I love this scene. Lucy telling Tim about her crappy day and Tim giving her perspective. Saying she could be the big hero tomorrow. Not only that but making her smile as well. Look at him building her up like it’s second nature. Cause it is. Damn I love these two. Him basically leaning on her and bumping her shoulder with his telling her not to be too greedy hehe That Lucy smile of his loud and proud. Making her beam as well. She loves this man next to her so much.

Oh my lord this entire scene had my heart racing. What an absolute BAMF our girl is holy hell. Tim would've lost his mind seeing this. Hell I did. I screamed when she got hit and my dog ran from the room LOL The looks on Harper/Lopez's face when she went down oh my goodness. The absolute panic on their faces. Right there with you ladies. This was a huge risk she took to prove herself. One like I said Tim would’ve lost his mind at seeing.

Lucy was definitely being the big hero this entire scene oh my lord my heart was pounding. What a way to impress Harper and Lopez but give me a damn heart attack. That scene in the ally with the brother..... I was worried when he didn’t stop she was gonna have to shoot him. Giving me 5x19 flashbacks. I think she is going to CARRY this with her for a long time. Being an empath is no joke. Our girl one of the finest even at her own detriment.

I was hoping for some insanely worried Tim and they DELIVERED. Like that man couldn't breathe till he set eyes on his girl. Oh my damn lord. The way he ran to get to her. Man on a mission doesn’t even stop to check in with Grey. By-passes them completely. Only wants to get to Lucy. His hand on her head had me reeling everyone. It's the gentle way he caresses her hair I'm squeeing. Also his non stop touching.

Trying to ground her by letting her know he was there emotionally and physically. Rubbing his thumb up and down her her collar bone. The sweet squeezes. I'm a puddle.. The way this man has transformed because of her still blows my mind. The sweet comforting touches. I'm losing my mind. His adorable attempt at a joke telling her she didn’t have to take the hero suggestion literally. Ugh Lucy breaking my heart into million pieces. Saying she doesn’t feel like one.

Melissa you deserve all the awards madam I’m crying. Her little pre cry when he says they'll deal with it my damn heart. Killing me. I love how Tim's hands have not left her for 90 percent of this moment. Protective Tim was very much present in this scene with Wes. Grey was too being like dude let us take the win. Feral Tim having Wes back it off for tomorrow. Wade being the sweet man he is says that's ok. Lucy is going to be anxious about all this. I would be stressed about him succumbing to his injuries now that Wes said that. Read the room Evers lol

Gah Tim telling her let’s go home. Then we get another glorious hug where he encases her in his arms. Protecting her emotionally from this situation. Lucy burying herself in his embrace. Wrapping her arm around him tightly to ground herself again. She needed to fall apart in his arms before they left. THIS IS SOO GOOD. Annnnnnd another head kiss I’m dead I am writing these thoughts from the grave.

Oh my word this season has delivered in spades both friggin crap. I’m out of breath from this episode in the best way. Also whoever does the music needs a raise I say it time and time again. But that song was perfection against the backdrop of this final scene. Was telling D earlier I already need to change my header to it.

I love this hug SO much it's insane. Sure I'll write a novel on it this summer. Having everything that's going on plus this I think our girl is hurtling toward a breakdown of some sort. Some actual UC/detective feelings coming with it. Cause our girl is anything but fine. I'm so excited to see where we go from here S6 has every bit worth the wait. I cannot wait till next week

Side notes -non Chenford

Yay Aaron progress in therapy. Back to active duty ha his heart rate going up for her too cute.

We finally get Nyla’s new hair style. Loving it

Adore the idea of Tim being one to take Aaron back out. Ain’t no one better.

Mmmh love hard ass TO Tim in metro uniform yummy. Does things to me. Aaron thinking he got this TRAIN but there is panic there.

‘Train is leaving the station officer Thorsen.’ Mmmm He does impress Tim for this first call. Yay Aaron haha

Giving Aaron only 9 minutes before bouncing him back to being a rookie oh my lord Timothy. I love you so much.

I do adore watching Tim watching Aaron do well. I’m sure there is a part of him that misses being a teacher. You can see it in these scenes. The pride and excitement he gets when Aaron is doing well. Aaron doing little fist pump and Tim shaking his head I’m dying.

Also How can Tim make leaning against a chair look so sexy? I want to be the chair he is leaning against in this scene with the wife LOL

Glad he passed Tim's TRAIN test. Glad they took their time getting him back out there. Was realistic

Feel free to comment any and all thoughts. I welcome them. See you all next week!

#Caitlin's mini reviews #chenford #S6 #6x04 Training Day #The rookie 6x04 #otp: unless it is #otp: doing my job #tim x lucy #tim bradford #lucy chen #the rookie #lucy x tim #eric winter #melissa o'neil #tim bradford x lucy chen

64 notes · View notes

hearts4golbach · 27 days

Text

The Night Shift.

Johnnie Guilbert x Fem!Reader.

Chapter 23.

"Is that taco bell breakfast i smell?" jake said, sounding as if he was about to start floating to locate the smell. he turned the corner into the kitchen, where i was sitting with tara.

it was 7 in the morning, and the 4 of us were about to go finally pack up my old apartment. they insisted on helping despite me saying i could get it all done myself since i didn't own much anyway.

"Yes, jake." she rolled her eyes, tossing him his usual order. he squeeled like a little girl before tearing into the wrap.

"im gonna go get johnnie up." i walked down the hall towards our room and walked in silently.

johnnie laid on the bed with a peaceful look on his face. his arms were tucked awkwardly under his head as his legs were tangled in the blankets.

i gently shook his shoulder, placing a kiss on his forehead. "Good morning, sleepy head. we have breakfast."

he rubbed his eye, black eyeshadow transferring to his finger. "mornin'." he pulled me in, kissing me softly before sitting up. "When you were asleep, i organized the closet. you can fit your clothes in half of it now."

"Oh my god, really?" i furrowed my eyebrows, a small smile growing on my face.

"i mean, yeah. where else are you going to put your clothes?" he slipped on his socks and stood up.

his fingers tangled with mine as he led me back into the kitchen and sat down next to me. he rested his hand right above my knee as Jake immediately started a conversation with them. i passed johnnie his breakfast, and he dug in, clearly starving.

jake looked down at his phone, "what time do you think we'll be done?"

"Well, im not too sure. i mean, theres 5 of us packing up my tiny apartment, so it's probably around noon." i thought outloud, earning a 'hm' from jake.

everyone had finished their food. jake and tara went to get their shoes on and start the car while johnnie went to take off his makeup. i sat in the kitchen on my phone, waiting for johnnie to be done.

"Ready to go?" he asked, his clean face making me smile. it wasn't often i got to see him without makeup.

"mhm." i stood up and stretched. i put my hair into a messy bun to get it out of the way before walking out the door, johnnie not far behind me. "Thank you again for helping with all of this."

"Don't thank me." he hesitated as if he was going to add onto the sentence. he gently rubbed my lower back.

i hummed, "Okay, then."

Johnnie and i sat in the back of jakes car while him and Tara were up front. I zoned out. thinking about my old apartment made me nervous. although i wasn't going alone, something still felt off. after the incident and how easily i got imhured, i didn't want the same to happen to them. Or maybe it was the fact that my creepy old neighbor lent me a piece to a vaccum, and i still need to give it back, but i seriously doubted that was the reason. i decided to shove my paranoia down as i didn't want to let it ruin my day.

it was if i had blinked and we were already there. i picked my head up, rubbing the cheek that was leaning on my arm.

"i was room number 206," i commented, pulling the keys out of my pocket.

"i can't believe theres not a fucking elevator. This bitch has 5 stories." Jake complained as we tromped up the stairs.

"Just be glad she's not on the 5th one," tara wiped smudged lip gloss off the corner of her mouth.

"Exactly," johnnie nods, slightly out of breath.

i unlocked my front door and pushed it open, revealing my still messy apartment. "Oh, i never came back to clean up." i admitted, even though it was plain to see.

"dont worry about it, missy." jake teased in his southern accent.

tara and jake covered the kitchen while johnnie and i started in the living room. we all added songs to the spotify queue and got to work. i was smart enough to keep boxes stored in my closet. There was always a just in case thing. The living room was nearly empty, the only furniture consisting of a rug and a small sofa that i planned on putting by the trash for someone else to take. i didn't have much decoration, either. All that i had was a painting, my mother had made me and a thrifted portrait of marilyn monroe. The only other things on the wall were some empty colorful vases on a small shelf.

we quickly wrapped those up while tara and jake stacked all of my plates and bowls in between wash cloths. I announced we were moving to a different room before heading into the hall to focus on the closet.

The closet didn't take much work. We shoved blankets and towels into one big box before moving on to my bedroom.

my room was a much bigger task, considering this was the room i spent most of my time in. i sat at my vanity and began packing it up while Johnnie took over the closet.

"i want to stream later, and i was wondering if you wanted to be on it." Johnnie mentioned, bagging up clothes that were hung up.

"Sure, that sounds fun. im still kind of nervous though, what if your fans don't like me?" i glanced over.

"They'll love you, i promise." he smiled at me. "i was thinking i could do your makeup for the stream."

"fuck yeah." i agreed, standing up and making my way to my side table. "Didn't we make those plans a while ago?"

"Yeah, but then a bunch of shit happened. and i figured since we're together now, everyone should get to know you a little better." A light blush spread across his face.

"Good idea. im down," i agreed.

The rest of the house was packed up within the next 3 hours. Jake and i moved all of the furniture down to the garbage bins, with little help from tara and johnnie. i took one last look at my empty apartment before locking it up and turning in my keys.

#fanfiction #fanfic #johnnie guilbert #jake and johnnie #johnnie guilbert x you #johnnie guilbert x reader #johnnie guilbert smut #jake webber #tara yummy #café #cafe aesthetic #cafe #hearts4golbach #the night shift #fluff #coffee

54 notes · View notes

year2000electronics · 3 months

Text

Welcome to the Brotherhood

just a little blurb about how i think shimmer entered the brotherhood au village :]

(brotherhood au belongs to @0ketlyn-s and @tea0w0stache , shimmer belongs to me)

Shimmer wouldn’t exactly call herself a “globe-trotter”. Sure, she had been near a lot of the different troll kingdoms, but each of them had their own complex cultures that she never really felt herself committing to all that hard. She wasn’t stingy about any of their music, no, it was just that… Even if she had lost the ability to sing her music properly, she was still a Pop Troll, deep down. The music she loved got stuck in your head, tunes with a catchy chorus and a consistent beat that wasn’t too focused on beeps and boops or country twang.

Her time spent just barely mingling with all the other Troll tribes had at least gotten her enough engineering know-how that she was able to make her autotuning choker work. That made her feel a little less like she was totally broken and alone, but… Even then, she could tell she longed desperately for a place she could call “home”. She had fled Pop Village in shame many years ago, so she was always reluctant to come back, but…

…There were people she missed there.

Maybe, just maybe, if she came back and shamefully admitted that she knew nobody could ever love her like this, especially not after running off, John and the others might throw her some pity and let her hang out with them as friends again.

Of course, the only problem with that is when she asked around, every troll who’d ventured to the Troll Tree said that the place had been abandoned for years. So where were they, then?

“I think maybe a cave somewhere?” One of her bounty hunter friends had guessed. “But there are a lot of caves out there. Don’t quote me on that.”

Nobody ever needed to bother the Pop Trolls. Very few even wanted to, considering they were the ones who were notorious for overpowering other peoples’ music. With the hint of just “a cave”, Shimmer would be spending a lot of time searching. But… What other choice did she have? The heart wants what it wants- and right now, what it wanted was home.

Of course, on the day she finally found that cave, well… Things didn’t exactly go how she expected.

Shimmer hadn’t even gotten that far into the cave when she felt something brush against her leg- a tripwire of some sort. Caught off guard, she yelped, falling flat on her face and right into a net. The sound of it all sent ripples through the rocky area, as a gaggle of trolls immediately rushed over to her area. They all looked… incredibly unhappy to see her. Some of them were fraught with fear, others alight with anger. Each tried to question her at once.

“Who are you? What are you doing here?!”

“She’s come to hurt the village!”

“She’s gonna sell us out to the Bergens!!”

“Did one of the outcasts call her??”

“Wha- no!” Shimmer grunted, trying to claw her way out of the net. “I’m not doing ANY of that! I’m literally FROM here!”

“You say that, but you didn’t know where all our tripwires were? Yeah. right,” One of the trolls scoffed.

“These weren’t HERE before!” Shimmer groaned in frustration. “Will you people just- LISTEN?!”

“Why should we listen to you?” Another fired back. “You’re a stranger!”

Shimmer’s eye twitched as this chicanery continued. She didn’t remember the village being THIS cagey… What had HAPPENED when she was gone? No matter what she said to them, they’d push back twice as hard, and it soon felt like she was going to be stuck in this net for good. However, something started to happen- she saw the crowd beginning to shift slowly, parting reverently as if to let someone in. She squinted, trying to get a good look at the newcomer.

Walking with a poised sense of patience, the man took careful yet confident steps, leading with his chest. He wore a set of eye-catchingly red garments, the scarf that wrapped around him and trailed down his arms resembling the wings of an angel more than anything. And his face… Oh, that face…

…

Was that… her ex??

“Everyone, settle down, settle down-” John Dory urged, trying to calm down the small group of trolls that had gathered with a frown. “What’s going on here?”

“It’s an outsider, John Dory!” One of the trolls cried in a panic. “She was trying to enter the village! What do we do with her?!”

John’s gaze steeled as he stepped closer to the net, trying to get a good look. “Show me.”

He was met with no resistance, and Shimmer’s heart nearly stopped as he set eyes on her. This man was… far different than the boy she once knew. He spoke like he carried the weight of the world on his shoulders, and the way he stared- his eyes were precise, like needles of sheer determination that pierced anyone they bored into. It made Shimmer go radio-silent as his eyes finally registered her. But then… his icy gaze began to change. His brows softened as his eyes met hers, and his pupils dilated. He stepped closer, almost as if he couldn’t believe she was real. His face got dangerously close to the net, as she leaned onto the edge of it, staring back at him with bated breath.

“Shimmer…?” He asked softly, reaching out a hand to try and grasp the net, only to seemingly back off out of nervousness.

Shimmer had to say something, she knew it. Something, ANYTHING, just to break the growing tension between them, the watching eyes as they both continued to stare at each other like frightened deer.

“...You’ve changed,” She whispered.

“I know,” He replied, brows furrowing slightly. He kept his cool, though, leaning forward slightly as he gave a glance at her own apparel. Her hair was in a sloppy ponytail, and she had given up on making herself look presentable, wearing a signature baggy sweater. “...So have you.”

John turned to the crowd, tilting his head in Shimmer’s direction. “What are you all waiting for? Cut her down! She’s one of us- we sang together back when I was in BroZone!”

The villagers leapt into action, clamoring about how they didn’t realize she knew the village savior and how that tie was very important to the village hierarchy or something. One of them went at it with a butterfly knife, cutting her free as she fell to the ground with a THUD. Dusting herself off, she looked up, only to see John extending a hand to her. She took it, letting the shorter troll lift her up. Once she stood up, though, the two of them continued to lock eyes, unable to tear away from each others’ gazes.

“Why’d you come back, Shimmer?” He asked. He tried to keep the question hovering in neutral territory, but there was a strong negative mix of emotions bleeding into his voice. Pain, shame, loss…

“...No other place felt right,” She admitted, pressing her forehead against the net. “Please, John- I don’t know why this place has changed so much, or why you look so… different… but- I’m lost. In every damn sense of the word. I don’t know who I am anymore.” The words stung to admit.

“I… I just thought maybe… Some old friends might… be able to help an old hag out,” She finished, trailing off. Her cheeks grew hot, her mouth stung. The onlooking villagers just made the entire ordeal so much harder. She broke eye contact with John, staring at the ground as if she was a child about to be punished.

John swallowed hard, wringing a hand around his scarf. He seemed deep in thought on what to do, glancing around at the others.

“Well-” He began to speak, combing his hair back. “We don’t usually… do this. But- so long as you promise you can be trusted, follow all the rules here, all that… Then I’m sure we can find a spot here for you.”

Shimmer let out a breath she didn’t even know she was holding.

“...Thanks, JD. I… I owe you one,” She said, cracking a wobbly smile.

“Of course,” He replied, stuffing down any feelings that may have risen up because of her, and defaulting right back to a serene smile, clasping his hands together. “Welcome to the village of the Brotherhood, Shimmer.”

Their eyes met one more time. Shimmer immediately got what he was trying to say by revealing the name of the village to her- Brotherhood. The BroZone boys she once knew had grown into men, with, apparently, a grandiose amount of social status. In essence, he had just told her some vital info: First, to expect a lot of changes from the village she once knew, and second… that he made the rules around the village, so she should really watch out for him.

Yeah.

No problem.

She could do that.

#trolls #brotherhood au #look at my writingggg #shimmer

68 notes · View notes

lincolndjarin · 9 months

Text

Best Kept Secret

chapter sixteen : absolution (RE-UPLOAD)

ao3 link ✿ series masterlist ✩ main masterlist ✧

pairing : bodyguard!Din Djarin x afab!princess!reader

rating : 18+ mdni

word count : 4.6k

summary : the reader attends a ball

warnings, etc. : language, angst

A/N : i had to change accounts so this is a re-upload of my ongoing fic bks!!

There’s a visceral sense of dread when you wake up, for several reasons.

The glaring obvious culprit of your discomfort would be the fact that today’s your husband's birthday. The much more subtle one being the fact that it still sounds like someones revving a podracer out in the main room, clearly indicating to you that the Mandalorian is still asleep.

You should wake him.

The last thing you need is the girls coming in to find him in your bed.

So you sit up, trying to stretch as quietly as possible before getting up and making your way out.

There are a lot of questions milling about in our mind right now, the most prominent one regarding his memory of last night.

Will he remember what he said?

Will you tell him if he doesn’t?

He seemed pretty out of it, and even if he did recall his words would he even address them?

He has to. He can’t just do that to you. It doesn’t matter how tired he is, he doesn’t get to toy with you like this.

So you step into the main room.

How is it possible to look so serious while sleeping yet sound so ridiculous?

You make your way to his side of the bed, gently shaking his shoulder.

“Mando, you need to get up.” You mumble, still trying to wake up your own brain.

He’s unmoving. His snores are as consistent as ever as you reach down to grab both of his shoulders, shaking him much less gently.

“Get up, the girls are gonna be here any min-“

You don’t even get a chance to scream as you’re flipped onto the bed. In the blink of an eye he’s got you shoved into the mattress. The wind gets knocked out of you, on instinct your hands go to take a defensive position in front of you but they’re pinned into the sheets, his body on all fours hovering above yours.

Neither of you speaks for a moment as he seems to still be waking up, your eyes wide as you stare up at him.

“…It’s just me.” You manage to squeak out through your shock and his grip on your wrists immediately loosens. Before he has a chance to react further there’s a single knock at the door signifying that Elaine and Lysa have arrived and as the door swings open you both move too quickly and your forehead knocks against his helmet as you struggle to get out from under him which subsequently sends you off the edge of the bed.

You can’t help but think that this morning can’t possibly get worse.

Of course it does though because you’re you and for some reason the Maker loves to see you suffer.

You grab onto him for support before you go tumbling off the mattress and of course he goes off of it with you and of course he twists himself so he hits the ground first.

Normally you’d be touched by the fact that his natural instinct was to protect you, but you don’t really have a chance to because the wind is knocked out of you for the second time this morning as your chest slams against his when his back hits the ground.

The girls walk in on the scene you’ve found yourself in and their chatter immediately goes silent.

Your first thought as you get your bearings is, at least you aren’t on the bed anymore.

But you can’t help but wish you’d stayed like that as you realize the position you’re in now. Your thighs straddle his waist and he’s holding you against him as you both groan in pain.

You both turn to look at the girls in sync, Lysa has a look of horror on her face and Elaine simply shakes her head as she grabs the other girl's arm, dragging her out of the room in silence before slamming the door shut.

You stare at the Mandalorian underneath you once they’re gone. You must look like a tomato with how red your face has become.

Before you can make it any worse he silently grabs you by the waist and lifts you off of him, setting you down next to him, neither of you daring to move further until he clears his throat.

“Are you alright?” He sounds as embarrassed as you feel.

“Yeah, just a little shaken up.” You whisper back. He rubs the back of his neck awkwardly.

“I didn’t mean to, I’m not used to being-“

“I know. It’s okay.”

It makes you a bit sad. What a life he must have known to have reacted like that when being woken up. To immediately be under the assumption that someone is going to hurt him.

He spends all of his time protecting you but who protects him?

Before you have any more time to wallow in that realization he’s on his feet and pulling you to yours.

You open your mouth to say something, anything, but he’s already heading for the door and you don’t bother trying to stop him as he goes, leaving the door open for the girls to come back in. As they step back into the room cautiously you watch him lean against the opposite wall before Elaine closes the door.

They both stare at you expectantly but you don’t have any words. No sense in lying and the truth sounds like a lie so you just keep your mouth shut.

When they realize you aren’t going to explain yourself they sit you at the vanity, Elaine takes a brush to your hair as Lysa hurries off to the closet, she looks more mortified than you do.

You frown at the mirror and watch as Elaine stifles a laugh.

“It isn’t funny.” You grumble as she continues brushing your hair.

“Of course it isn’t, my lady.” She dons an expression of mock seriousness as you turn around to glare at her.

“Nothing happened, he was just sleeping.” Before the words even leave your mouth you know they must sound absurd as she chokes back another laugh.

“I’m sure he was ma’am.” She turns your head back towards the mirror and you don’t bother arguing further.

Lysa returns from the closet with a dress you’re sure you’ve never seen before and you can’t help but gawk at it.

It’s gorgeous. You swear you haven’t seen it there before, it’s a beautiful champagne ball gown, she sets it carefully onto the bed.

“Shall we go to the fresher? We’ve already drawn your bath my lady.” Elaine takes you by the arm and leads you out of the room. The Mandalorian looks like he’s managed to pull himself together as the girls lead you to the fresher down the hall. He follows closely behind, only halting when you arrive, thank gods he stays outside when the girls usher you in.

They carefully strip you of your nightgown and Lysa leads you to the tub. Once you’re settled they prepare to take their leave.

“You’ll need to see to it that you are properly clean, my lady, you’ll want to look your best for tonight, can I get you anything before we leave to continue your preparations?” Elaine cocks an eyebrow as Lysa hurries out, still not making eye contact with you. “Don’t worry about her.” Elaine winks and you frown at the implication.

“Just a book if I’m going to be here for a while I suppose.”

She nods.

“Right away, my lady. And shall I send the Mandalorian in when I take my leave?”

“Elaine!” You shriek as she leaves, snickering until the door is shut, leaving you to stare, embarrassed, into the bubbles.

After you have to sit in your shame for a few minutes she returns with a smirk, handing you some raunchy romance novel which you take with a scowl before she leaves without a word.

You soak in the tub for quite some time. You get through a good third of the book by the time the girls come to get you.

If you thought they spent too much time dressing you on a normal day that was nothing compared to today. Hours of doing absolute nonsense to your body. They rub unfamiliar oils into your hair and skin, pluck at stray hairs and spend an obscene amount of time deciding what jewelry would look best with the dress.

You try to find a time to talk to Mando but everytime you think you’ll get the chance one of the girls whisks you away for another unfamiliar skin care regimen until you feel scrubbed and raw.

They quite literally do this the entire day. By the time they’re done the sun is setting outside your window and you know the ball is going to begin soon. They lace you into the gown. It really is a work of art with its long flowing skirt and the way it hugs your torso. A beaded pattern runs up the front like vines. The color of it reminds you of the way Elaine makes your tea and caf, a light cream color.

They decided on pearls. Simple and elegant strings of pearls around your neck and wrists. You stop them as they go to do your hair.

“Can we leave it down? I like it the way it is.” You stare at yourself in the mirror.

You look nice. Really nice.

Like you.

“It looks good like that.” Lysa speaks up, seemingly she’s recovered from earlier.

“If you need anything at all, do not be afraid to call for us, my lady.” Elaine says as she smiles at you before they make their way out.

“Elaine?”

“Yes, princess?” She turns to face you, Lysa on her arm.

“Send the Mandalorian in please.” She doesn’t hide her smirk.

“Right away, my lady.”

They’re gone and you’re left alone for a few moments as you admire their work in the mirror until you hear the door softly creak open. He doesn’t speak as he enters, closing the door behind him, you smooth out the front of your gown with your hands before turning to face him.

“Can we talk about last night?” You try not to sound like you’re begging but in all honesty if that’s what it takes to get him to talk you’ll do it.

“There’s nothing to talk about.” His voice is cold and unfeeling. You hate it.

“Please don’t do this.” You close your eyes. You give him a moment, a chance to say something, but he never speaks so you take a deep breath before marching towards the door, he’s hot on your heels.

“Princess, please, just wait-“ He tries to shut the door but you yank it open.

“I’m sick of waiting, I’m not doing this again, now let's go before we’re late.” You snap at him before taking off towards the main hall, the sounds of music and chatter already filling the castle.

He doesn’t try to stop you again.

You walk until you see a line of people entering the hall, all of them clearing a path for you, as you step into the noisy, bright room you’re immediately overwhelmed. A man immediately to your left loudly announces:

“Princess Harand.”

You cringe slightly at the name as you stare out into the crowded hall.

There's way more people than you had expected. If it weren’t for his tasteless electric blue suit you wouldn’t even know where to begin to look for Kodo. Is it literally glowing? It looks like the jacket is literally glowing.

You have to shimmy your way through the crowd to get to him, eventually, once people see the Mandalorian they start clearing a path. He always stays just a few steps behind.

Get to Kodo, wish him a happy birthday, have a few drinks, make sure people see you, then get out. It’s easy enough.

When you finally make it to Kodo you can hear him saying something vulgar loudly to a group of men, many of whom you recognize from that terrible dinner a few moons back. A fair amount of them take a step back as you approach with the Mandalorian.

It disgusts you to do so but you lean in to give Kodo a chaste kiss on the cheek.

“Happy birthday, my prince.” You give him the best smile you can muster considering the fact that he repulses you and you’re already in a sour mood because of Mando.

“There’s my little mouse! I’ve been waiting for you!” He wraps the arm that isn’t currently nursing a drink around your waist as he pulls you in for a sloppy, drunken kiss. You manage to pull away from it quickly and resist the urge to wipe your mouth. He holds you at his side for a disappointing amount of time. Dragging you around like an accessory or perhaps a show dog for everyone to see, never even directly speaking to you. That is until about an hour and a half into your time at the ball, he leans in to whisper to you, his breath hot on your ear.

“Say, little mouse, what do you reckon the Mandalorians type is?”

The abruptness of his question makes your blood run cold.

Married women? Princesses?

You struggle to come up with an answer for a brief moment until he drunkenly slurs in your ear again.

“I’d like to give him the night off, maybe give him a girl for the evening.”

The thought makes you sick.

Of course, maybe the Mandalorian would want that sort of thing. But you want no part of it if that is the case so you give Kodo a weak smile as you eye Mando, still standing behind you, certainly listening in to this conversation.

“I have no idea, dear husband.” You whisper back.

Almost as if on cue the doors are pulled open and you see exactly what Elaine meant when she said that this party would get rowdy as the night went on. What must be dozens of girls are ushered into the room and Kodo immediately releases his grip on your waist.

“Run along now little mouse, perhaps go get yourself some refreshments.” He doesn’t even bother to look at you as he says it, his eyes trained on the women as they make their way over to him. Birthday boy must get to pick first you think as you roll your eyes, making your way over to a table with drinks, gulping down a glass of wine. As you look around the room you can’t help but laugh dryly.

It seems like all the other wives have been dismissed.

You sip on another glass of wine as you watch Kodo pick out three girls.

Ambitious.

You want to laugh again but you don’t get the chance to as Kodo points behind him and see him leading one of the girls towards Mando.

You hadn’t even realized he wasn’t with you, Kodo must have told him to stay.

She’s pretty.

It makes your stomach churn as her fingers trace his chest plate and you can’t look anymore as she starts whispering to him. You look back to your husband whose tongue is already down another woman's throat.

That should bother you more, but you feel nothing as you stare.

Yet when you look at Mando simply speaking to the beautiful woman before him your heart clenches.

So you stop looking, instead you shove yourself through the crowds until you make your way out of the party.

Struggling to catch your breath as you stumble through the hallway, kicking your heels off and rushing towards the door you know will take you to the gardens. Desperate for air.

You don’t hear his footsteps coming up behind you. You don’t even see him until you’re outside the castle, marching towards the forest trail.

“Princess, please.” You hear the crackle of the modulator but ignore it as you continue stomping barefoot across the grounds. He catches up easily, he reaches for you but you swat his hand away.

“Go back inside, I’m sure that girl is waiting for you.” You snarl before continuing to make your way into the trees. You aren’t exactly sure what the goal is here but you just know that you need to get as far away from the castle as possible.

“Don’t do that, you know I didn’t ask for that.” He pleads as you turn around to face him, hiking your skirt up a bit.

“You seemed bored and she seemed to be entertaining you just fine.” You hiss, before turning back around and continuing your hasty trek until you finally reach the gardens, settling near a few trees as you look up at the moon.

What’s the plan now that you’re here?

You’d kind of assumed that he wouldn’t follow you yet here he is, moonlight reflecting off of his armor.

“Go back to her, I’m sure you’ll have a much better time there than you will here.” You grumble as he stands behind you, dutifully as ever.

“I dismissed her. Obviously.” His tone is snarky and his breath sounds shallow as you turn around to better assess him.

He’s panting. It’s a bit surprising considering he’s so rarely out of breath, he’s never struggled to keep up with you previously and in instances of stress he rarely sounds winded.

Yet right now his chest heaves under his armor and he sounds as if he has been chasing you his entire life and has only just now caught up.

“What is wrong with you? You sound as though you have followed me across the planet, not out into the gardens.” You scold him as you lean against one of the trees. Sick of playing this endless game with him as his head falls back in exasperation.

“This is what happens when one aches as I have ached.” He growls back, taking a step towards you and pointing an accusatory finger in your direction.

“You… ache?” Your brows are furrowed in confusion at his choice of words as you scoff.

“Yes.” He drops his hand to his side as he sighs.

“I don’t- I don’t understand.” You stand up straighter as your gaze softens a bit, he sounds so dejected.

His helmet faces you with such severity that it is as if there isn’t a layer of steel between you. It’s as if you’re staring directly into each other's eyes.

It’s quiet. The only sounds are his heavy breathing and the occasional sound of bugs buzzing through the leaves of the greenery around you. The modulator crackles every so often like he’s trying to figure out what to say but just can’t seem to find the words. Every so often he’ll stutter out the start of a sentence and then stop.

You don’t walk away this time.

And you don’t chastise him.

Instead you let him figure it out as you stare at him, unable to keep the sympathetic look off your face as you try to come off as stern.

You give him time, he watches you as you watch the moon.

After several minutes he seems to settle into a calm so you look back into the visor.

He sighs, and when he does speak his voice is low and hoarse.

“I ache. Day and night, my flesh, my bones, and my mind ache.”

Your breath catches in your throat.

He takes a step towards you.

“I ache in your presence, I ache when we are apart and the only thing that soothes the agony within me is to be the object of your attention. I cannot so much as breathe without being wounded by you. You have buried yourself so deeply within my very being that I cannot escape you. There is not a blade in this galaxy that is sharp enough to carve out the mark you have left inside of me.” His voice doesn’t tremble, he doesn’t so much as stutter as he speaks now.

You have to look away. You don’t know how it’s possible for someone wearing a helmet to have such an intense gaze but you can’t bear to see it anymore as you stare at the ground.

“You don’t mean that. You can’t possibly mean that.” Is all you manage to mumble, your mind racing almost as fast as your heart as he takes another step towards you, he’s within arms reach of you but he makes no move to touch you yet.

“I could leave right now. Pack up my things and fly to the furthest outer rim planet I can find, spend the rest of my days alone, and every second of my existence would still be spent wondering if you are okay, what you are doing, and if you are happy.”

He brings his hand up to rest under your chin, tilting your head up to face him once more before dropping it to his side again.

“They could drag me away right now, lock me up, bind me in steel in the deepest cell the castle dungeon has to offer. They could torture me for things I’ve done to you, for the things I yearn to do to you, and I would live out the rest of my days hoping that my imprisonment does not inconvenience you.”

He takes one more step forward. You’re certain you’re trembling at this point, his voice drips with a level of devotion that you cannot begin to fathom. He’s close enough now that if you listen carefully enough you can hear his real voice behind the helmet along with the modulated version, unfiltered and raw.

“You could force me to my knees right now, make me renounce my creed, tear my helmet from my head, and lay me bare for your judgment. And all I would do is pray that my face is up to your standards.”

His breathing is labored as he stares down at you.

There is no air of falsehood to his words yet you can’t seem to accept them.

You want nothing more than to believe everything he is saying but you just can’t bring yourself to, as you stare right back up at him.

“Why should I believe that? Why should I believe a word that comes out of your blasphemous mouth when I don’t even know who I’m talking to?” You can feel your anger bubbling to the surface.

He doesn’t seem to have a response and you’re getting fired up so you don’t bother waiting for him this time.

“Why should I believe that this is not a trick? That you are not simply toying with me to get me into your bed?” You jab a finger into his chest plate as you say it.

He doesn’t so much as move an inch.

“Every hour I find that I am speaking to a new version of you, why should I believe that this version, the version that aches will not be gone just as quickly as the others?” Your voice is strained as you continue to berate him, the part of you that longs to believe his every word is creeping into your mind as you try desperately to shove it away. “I don’t even know which one I’m speaking to now, so who is it Mando?”

He takes another step forward and you shove him back this time. You know you aren’t actually strong enough to move him so you’re grateful for the fact that he takes a step back on his own.

“I know I’ve been cruel to you and I’m sorry, you think it doesn’t bring me shame to know that I’ve hurt you?” His voice carries that gentle tone that always manages to soothe you, the one he reserves just for you, except this time it does nothing to put you at ease.

“It brings you shame? Imagine how I feel. You do not know what it is to ache as I have, you are one of the only good things I have left and I don't even know what you are. So tell me Mando, who have you decided to be today? My bodyguard? My lover? Perhaps you would like to be my rival today, or maybe even my friend?” You feel your eyes growing misty as you fight to keep what little composure you have left. “Spit it out! Which Mando have you decided to be today? I’d love to know who I’m talking to, which one have you decided to be? Who are you Mando?”

“Din.”

“What?”

“Right now I’m Din.”

It takes a moment for it to register in your brain. And when it does there isn’t room for anger anymore, and there isn’t room for confusion. There’s only room for him, he’s taking up all the space.

Din.

“Is that okay?” His voice is barely a whisper.

Just Din.

You don’t want to be mad at Din.

“Yes.”

“I’m sorry. For everything.”

“It’s okay.”

“It isn’t though.”

“Din is enough, for now.”

You want to take his hand, something, anything to comfort him, to let him know that for now it’s okay, but before you get the chance you feel leather covering your eyes. His hand presses gently against the top half of your face and your vision goes dark.

And then you hear the hiss of air.

You let out a small gasp and as you do his lips are on yours. Warm, soft, and needy.

You’ve read hundreds of kisses. Every one of your little romance novels has them. They’re always rough, desperate and electric. That’s always how they’re described. Like an electric shock.

This isn’t that.

This is familiar, and sweet, quite literally his mouth tastes like vanilla. (If that’s even possible.) It crosses your mind that this is probably his first kiss but it certainly doesn’t feel like it. As his lips fit against yours like they were made to. As if he were forged just for you. His kiss feels like he wants to melt into you, like he’d be content to do just this for the rest of his life.

But most importantly, it soothes the ache.

He doesn’t pull away, he breathes into you. His mouth is persistent against yours, his stubble scratching against your chin. When you bring your hands up to cup his face you realize he’s holding his helmet up just enough to expose everything below his nose. You settle for resting them on his shoulders instead.

He doesn’t ask for more.

Just this.

He doesn’t push for anything other than his lips on yours and it gives you a strange feeling of safety.

And it’s over too soon.

He pulls away and before you’re ready for it to end you hear air hissing again and his hand moves from your eyes to cradle your cheek.

You’re staring at Beskar, as if he never even took it off in the first place.

“Was that okay?” He sounds almost self-conscious and you can’t help but smile.

“More than okay.” You murmur as his thumb caresses your face.

“I will make it up to you. For everything I did, I will find a way to make it up to you.”

“Okay, Din.” You say softly as he reaches down to take your hand.

“No more days, no more rules, and no more games. Just you.” You let him bring your hand up to rest on the steel of his helmet. “I’ll make it up to you sarad.” He holds your hand there for a moment before taking a step back. “I have an idea.”

It feels too good to be true. All of this, and something in the back of your mind tries to remind you of that fact but you push it away.

“I want you to know me, is that okay?”

You nod.

He holds his hand out to you.

You take his hand. You take Din’s hand.

“Would you like to see my cabin sarad’ika?”

I am no longer doing taglists so follow @lincolndjarinnotifs and turn on notifications to be notified when new chapters are posted !!

#lincolndjarin #the mandalorian #best kept secret #bks #din djarin #the mandalorian x reader #the mandalorian fanfiction #the mandalorian x you #din dijarin x reader #din djarin x reader #din djarin x you #din djarin fanfiction #RE UPLOAD

278 notes · View notes

xshybutdeadlyx · 2 months

Text

Questions for the demiromantic and demisexuals out there

Ok, so I've recently found this term thanks to an aroace character from a show I watched. I knew of the sexuality but I didn't really know the specifics because I always thought I was bi but now looking into it I didn't know how aroace was like a literal umbrella and there was so much more to it then meets the eye. Which I'm 30 I feel like I should know more than what I do. But with doing research into it trying to understand it better, I learned about all the terms, and I learned about demiromantic and demisexual and it really resonated with me. But I wanted to ask for advice, I guess? Like I like romance I love reading it seeing art and what have you but when it comes to romance for myself I'm not a big fan? And maybe it's because I literally have to unlearn so much romance equals a, b, and c when that's not really true. I literally been in only one relationship in my life and it consisted of hand holding small kisses (no tongue, honestly I have an ick with spit and the only reason I "wanted" to do deeper kisses with the boyfriend I had at the time was because I felt like it was a requirement) but I honestly didn't feel attraction towards him until after getting to know him and being friends with him for months well into almost a year. And he's the only one I ever felt that way for I hardly ever had crushes or when I did I almost kinda forced myself into having them if that makes sense? It was "natural," and every kid was supposed to have crushes. Nothing ever came from the "crushes" though.

Now, like I said, I'm well into my 30s, and the relationship I just mentioned was the only relationship romantic wise I've ever had. I have had strong feelings for two of the friends I have but one friend is straight as they come and the other is married lol the one that is married though we have a strong bond that I wouldn't trade anything for. She tickles my hand, and she lets me cuddle her all the time, and we just spend nights just playing games together, just like when we were in high school. I love her so damn much, and I'll cherish what we have even when we are both dead and gone. She is my forever person.

Sorry, I went into a mini rant about my platonic love, but she's the best, and when I start talking about her, I have to gush lol, but anyways back to my sexuality crisis

So anyways, when there is even a chance of someone having an interest in me, I honestly kind of freak out. Or like if someone tries to set me up with someone, red neon flashing warning signs pop up for me. I don't know that person, and honestly, I get put off by big romantic gestures. Like, I appreciate it, but I don't think it's necessary? Can we just go get McDonald's, sit in the parking lot, and just shoot the shit? Play some games? We can watch movies or shows too.

I've also been on the dating websites and such as well, and I'm just always immediately put off. "Hello beautiful," ugh. "Insert pickup line here." please God why. "Unsolicited romantic or sexual advances right after a day of talking." Haha, no. There was literally one guy I thought was cool and we kinda flirted but it was really just talking everyday about the games we were playing I feel like if given time a connection could of been built but he ended up finding someone else immediately. Which honestly was fine I was kinda bummed but like if he wanted romance immediately, I wasn't gonna be giving that to him. I wanted to still be friends, but apparently, we had "too much history," so he ended up blocking me. lol oh well.

I've also literally only have had two "crushes" in like in a 5 year time span (only because this is what I can remember lol) one of em was so goofy and seemed so fun but then it seems like they turned out to be very self absorbed instantly done the other had baby mama drama wasn't into that. Honestly, those things seem to be things that could be worked through? Maybe? But once I just see something off-putting, it's all I see, which seems more like a personal thing because of past traumas.

As of now I'm honestly content with no romantic relationship but I feel like I do want one but I don't want one with just anyone and it just doesn't seem like many people out there are willing to wait or willing to be friends first and want to hop into relationships immediately when I very much don't. It takes me a while to be comfortable with people, and I want to get to know them as a person.

For a long time I felt like I just wasn't doing things right or that I had to actually change something that I was doing. I thought I was wrong or that I should just force myself into the uncomfortable situation of being someone's girlfriend immediately but then if it turns out I just don't have those romantic feelings then there the whole process of hurting them which is just anxiety inducting.

Also, with all that I'm saying, it does go into the demisexual portion, too. I've still never been with someone sexually because even in the one relationship I have had, I haven't met someone I've trusted to give myself to. The thought of one night stands or anything of the like just makes me wanna crawl into myself. I don't mind anything sexual but I want to be with someone sexually that I trust and care about with my whole being, not some dude Craig or some chick Wendy from Tinder. I'm content with that, but a lot of the times, I'm almost made to feel bad because I haven't done anything sexual. But boy, can I read all the smut on Ao3. Like it all in theory, but dunno about in practice lol I just don't have much of a drive in general, but I don't know if that's just because I've never been with anyone before? I keep getting told, "As soon as you're with someone, your sex drive changes," and like, does that shit really happen? Lol

All in all, I really feel connected to the terms demiromantic and demisexual. Even when I just said I'm bi, it just never felt right, but for once, I feel like I finally found something that I felt connected to and finally found me. But I guess I also wanna feel like I'm right in assuming so? I dunno I feel like it'd be disrespectful in using a label that isn't really you? Which doesn't sound right because everyone has the right to find themselves, and sometimes people go through a list until they finally find themselves, which is what's happening to me right now. But my feelings also just get jumbled up and I have a hard time distinguishing what's been conditioned in me, like how you date, you get into a relationship, ya do couple things, then you get married ect. When all I wanna do is get to know you, really know you, then actually date but even then I feel like a lot of my stuff is more on the platonic end? Like, I like cuddling and kissing, and I do like romance but on a more tame level? I kick my feet when reading "he bought her all these extravagant gifts then he swept her off her feet and dipped her into a kiss" so cute but like if I was actually in that situation like bro put me down for real and I'm so awkward when given gifts lol

I dunno I'd just would really like to discuss this with others who have found themselves because I don't really have anyone else to talk to about this. I've talked to my friends and they of course support me and love me but I feel like they don't really get it? And my family just chalks it up to " Ya just don't have a lot of experience it'll all change when ya get out there and mingle with people"

Thanks in advance for reading all this if ya made it this far I know it's a lot of word vomit as I like to call it but I don't have very organized thoughts and I just kinda write what I'm thinking in the moment lol

#aroace #demisexual #demiromantic

38 notes · View notes

call-me-a-simp · 7 months

Text

No One Hates You More Than I Do

Talk It Out (Part 6)

Enemies to lovers (Rhea Ripley x fem. Reader):

You're a well known wrestler in WWE and Rhea is your worst enemy. You hate each other in and outside of the ring. Rhea always flirts with you, not that she means it, she just knows it makes you furious and wants to annoy you. But one day everything changes and you start to feel like all of this isn't a joke anymore and that there might actually be something between you two.

You get ready for work and head out the door, grabbing an energy drink from the nearby grocery store on your way. It was a pretty chill day, only a few interviews and more prepping stuff for the upcoming show where they plan to reveal you as the new member of The Judgement Day.

That evening after work you decide to attend the local gym as you didn't have time for you daily workout yet. You don't notice the person following you in your tired state. You probably wouldn't have noticed them at all if they wouldn't have let you known they're there during one of your breaks between some reps.

Rhea's eyes follow you the whole day, noticing your tired expression and weak body from the lack of sleep and proper food. She doesn't even try to deny her being worried about you. So after you left work she decides to follow you. Keeping a safe distance with her car until she sees you enter the towns local gym. She parks her car in a nearby parking lot where she is able to see if you would leave the building again or not.

Sitting there in silence she thinks about her feelings towards you and your reaction when she told you. It made her wonder if you secretly felt the same and just also had difficulties expressing that. After about twenty minutes she finally worked up the courage to confront you with her thoughts and theories so she gets out the car and walks over to the building you're in.

It doesn't take her long to find you since it's a fairly small area with quite few people being there at that time. She waits until you're taking a break to speak to you.

"Hey" you hear a familiar voice and look up. It was Rhea. "What do you want? Can't you see that I'm busy right now?" you attack her annoyed. "Sorry to bother you.." she raises her arms in defence and looks hurt at your reaction, which makes you feel guilty almost immediately. "I'm sorry, I'm just very tired." you mumble and sigh. "What is it Ripley? What are you here for?" "I just wanted to talk about.. some uh.. thoughts of mine.." Rhea admits and blushes.

"Fine by me, want to tell me while I finish my reps?" You ask her. "I'd prefer to wait until we're alone, but I can spot you and maybe give you some tips until then?" Rhea responds in a questioning tone. You shrug and nod.

About half an hour later you're walking out of the gym together. "My apartment is almost right around the corner, wanna meet there?" You turn to look at Ripley. "Bet I'll be there first!" Rhea playfully smirks at you and runs off to her car. You didn't notice you were smiling at her actions until you accidentally saw your reflection on the car window. You quickly replace it with a neutral look and shake your head at your behaviour. Why were you smiling at her stupid jokes?

Five minutes later you unlock your front door where Rhea was already waiting for you. Opening it you begin to question yourself if this might be a mistake, if Rhea was just acting nice to land a critical hit on you. You brush it off as your normal overthinking and hold the door open for your guest.

"I haven't cleaned today or anything so please don't mind the mess.." you mumble more to yourself than to her. Rhea hums and follows you to the big main room, consisting of living room and kitchen at the same time. "I'm gonna order some pizza, you want something too?" You ask without turning around to her. "I'm good, thanks" she denies your offer. She then patiently waits until your done with the phone call before speaking up again.

"So uhm.. like I said I wanted to talk about some of my thoughts with you because i feel the urge to clarify some things but now that I'm actually here it's harder than I originally thought.." your counterpart admits awkwardly.

"Tomorrow's a holiday which means no work which means we've got all night" you shrug and turn around to her with a little smile that's meant to reassure her. Your eyes meet and you can see her relax a little more. You smile at each other and you walk over to the couch, signaling Rhea to come sit next to you.

"Maybe it'll be easier if we don't start with it right away and instead focus on something else. For example finally getting over our egos and start working together for real this time." you say with a serious undertone in your voice. Rhea nods but avoids looking directly at you.

"You're right" she eventually says and lifts up her gaze, meeting yours. "I'm sorry for treating you bad all these years, even after I thought we got over our problems. I somehow couldn't help but spread rumors about you, which again, leads us to why I wanted to talk to you so bad" she sighs.

"I know.." you whisper. "And to be honest.. I kinda feel drawn to you too.." There's a few moments of silence until you continue. "It just confuses me because I never felt this way with another woman before. Does that mean I'm a lesbian now?"

Rhea breaks out laughing and you can't help but chuckle too. "If you're still attracted to men then no, it does not make you a lesbian" Ripley laughs but then gets serious again. "So you do like me back?" she wants to clarify, praying she didn't interpret your words the wrong way.

"I- I don't know, like, the sex we had was pretty damn good I have to admit, and I wouldn't complain if we did it again.." you shyly look at her, nervously chuckling as an attempt to calm the anxiety a little. Seeing her eyes lighten up at those words and the little smile that sneaks into her face makes you feel a certain warmth and ease inside. "I.. guess we could try.." you whisper, breaking eye contact as you can feel the heat rush into your cheeks.

"So- uh.. you're saying you think you do like me back and that you're willing to date me, like.. seriously?" Rhea asks completely overwhelmed. "God damn it, yes, you idiot!" You exclaim and wrap your hands around her neck kissing her.

You both smile into the kiss and you lean back, pulling Rhea on top of yourself as you lay down. "I still fucking hate you for what you've done, just to be clear" you murmur against her lips and she chuckles in response. "And what do you want me to do about it now.." she then teases you. "Maybe fuck you so hard you just forget about it?" she smirks at you. "Mmh.. maybe?" you whisper and smirk back at her.

Rhea kisses you again and begins to trail kisses along your jawline and down to the crook of your neck. Slipping one of her legs between yours, she presses her body down against your own, creating a friction that makes you moan softly.

But before it could go any further the doorbell rings, and you push Rhea off of yourself with a grin. You liked that you were able to make her horny and now she got to wait. She looks back at you pouting, but eventually smiles at you as she watches you come back, already with a mouth full of pizza.

"God I just can't be mad at you" she sighs and guides you to sit between her legs with your back against her chest. "I'll turn on a movie okay?" she says softly and kisses your temple while reaching for the tv remote.

----------------------------------------------------------

I AM SO INCREDIBLY SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING Y'ALL FOR SO LONG!!! I don't know what's going on with me at the moment myself or I would have explained it to you, but ye, hope you enjoy and I'll try to write more now :)

Taglist: @specialinterestshows @butterfly12347 @billiewherearetheavocados @lomlrhea @hatdog96 @plk-18 @babybatlover @wiccanpriestess @kagome2909 @domlynch

#wrestling #demi bennett #rhea ripley #rhea ripley x reader #wwe x reader #the judgement day wwe #gxg #gxg scenarios #enemies to lovers #love confessions #gay love #love story #love #talk it out #talk to me #affectionate cuddling #couple cuddling #gay cuddling #cuddles

97 notes · View notes

fairypowerful · 11 months

Text

The Ship That Was Endgame Since the Beginning (confirmed)

Narratively, Michaela and Zeke were always meant to find each other and be together.

Narratively, Jared and Mick were not meant to be.

From the very beginning – S01E01.

(Edit: The show’s creator, Jeff Rake, said this was always the ending, “just tightened up along the way.” You got that? Zekaela were planned since long before Matt Long got the role as Zeke – Matt said that his first phone call with Jeff in 2018 after getting the role was himself being told that Zekaela were soulmates! LMAO 😂 I didn’t need this double confirmation in order to know that, because in hindsight, the clues were there from the way everything led to them and when looking at their first two episodes together.)

The offscreen event that led to Mick being in a bad place mentally/emotionally (her BFF Evie’s death) had also led to her hesitation of Jared’s proposal, which led to her getting on Flight 828 because she didn’t wanna have to deal with that and her family pressuring her to accept. (“It’s not just about you. This family needs something to celebrate” / “And I know you love Jared” / “Why are you fighting this when all it’s gonna do is make you happy?”)

It was a domino effect. The plane disappearing led to Jared marrying Mick’s other BFF, Lourdes, four years later, and the plane reappeared a year after that.

Mick became the other woman in that marriage, which she deeply regretted; and she not only destroyed her now-ex BFF’s marriage, but also lost another lifelong friendship on top of being too wrought with guilt over Evie (which she forgives herself for in the final season). Jared didn’t really show any remorse, but Mick now had all of that weighing her down and didn’t want to continue with him. And Jared certainly didn’t make it easy on her.

Really, these two were not right for each other. Not to mention, Jared unnecessarily stirred up trouble and a lot of stress for Mick due to his possessiveness over her, and his immediate jealousy and rather extreme hostility towards Zeke upon first meeting. Very toxic. Just gross. Not right.

~~~

I think it’s important to remember, too, the original series order was 13 episodes – the “find her” Calling was in the tenth episode, Zeke appears in the twelfth episode, and the thirteenth ended with him and Mick in front of the petroglyph of two stick figures holding hands, outside under the stars.

Those episodes would’ve been written in cohesion with the preceding storylines, especially considering the nature of the show and its mythology needing to be mapped out instead of written on the spot – meaning that Zekaela was not shoehorned into the show. Keyword, “cohesion.”

Those episodes and the character would’ve been written long before the actor was even cast into the role. It was always planned.

🤭 It’s also confirmed.

Their soulmatism was sprinkled all over their story, starting in their first two episodes together.

“It’s all connected,” didn’t you know? 😉

The show’s been consistent about that.

Look at the acting choices in Season 1 from before Zeke’s introduction. In multiple scenes, Jared told Mick they were supposed to be together and she’d shake her head ‘no.’ Like her heart knew, but she consciously didn’t yet. When Jared told her she’s his soulmate, Mick said, “No, I’m not.”

Narratively, her heart always belonged elsewhere. After she met Zeke, she always chose him over Jared from that point onward. Everything that happened led her to him, including her conscious choices post-Pilot and pre-Vanishing Point, which basically worked in tandem with the universe. The cheating/ruining BFF’s marriage/losing her BFF was a major deciding factor for her in not getting back with Jared anytime soon … and then she finally meets Zeke whom the universe had also brought forward in time.

~~~

So, I want to put my thoughts to some of the things I’ve read by antis…

“The only thing Zeke and Mick had in common were the Callings”

That’s not true. You had to have watched the show with your eyes closed to come up with that.

A Calling brought them together, sure, but it didn’t make them connect and fall in love, or be happier around one another. A Calling isn’t a love potion or a magic spell.

Zekaela was a pretty peaceful relationship in a sea of turmoil (the government, the X-ers, the hatred and violence against 828ers), whereas Jachaela was an angsty teen drama amidst the external turmoil. 😶

I’m going to quote a character from a different story who chose his wife over someone else he had feelings with, because I think it applies very much with Mick choosing Zeke over and over again every single time. “Passion is … it’s fire. And fire is great, man. But we’re made of water. Water is how we keep living. Water is what we need to survive. My family was my water. I picked water. I’ll pick water every time.” And I’ll add another quote from the same character talking about his wife and what it was like in meeting her, replacing the name with Mick’s because it is very much in alignment with Zekaela’s story. “But when I met [Mick], it was something different altogether. She just … made the world make sense to me. She even made me like myself more. And there was a calmness to her that … nobody else had. It felt like when I was with her, I knew everything would be fine. It was like I was following the North Star.”

Mick being Zeke’s North Star is literally canon, by the way.

(S01E13 and S04E18).

~~~

“The only reason why Zeke and Mick got together was due to the time travel and the Callings”

Yeah, that’s how storytelling works.

Crying about this is like complaining that the only reason the Doctor regenerates is because he’s an alien from Gallifrey and the Doctor Who writers in 1966 came up with a way to replace the leading actor without getting rid of the main character. Or rather, it’s like complaining that the only reason Mary Margaret and David fell in love despite the Dark Curse amnesia is because they were Snow White and Charming in the Enchanted Forest.

Trying to belittle Mick and Zeke’s love by attacking the narrative, that’s pathetic.

“But it’s forced”

No, it’s not. The little things the writers added years later, like Afterlife!Zeke telling Mick about them having moments in their lives where they almost met, is not forced, because the audience (who don’t have blinders on during their story) already knew they were soulmates and it’s literally how storytelling works.

Heaven forbid TV writers foreshadow, expand, and give callbacks to scenes from previous seasons ever again! Heaven forbid we ever get flashbacks in later seasons! Heaven forbid you ever watch another TV show with more than 1 season because “they added this years later, so it’s forced”!

“But Mick and Jared knew each other the longest”

So? That doesn’t matter. Do you actually believe length is an indicator of whether or not someone is the love of your life? Just…wow! Heaven forbid anybody not get back together with an ex simply because they knew them longer. Heaven forbid anybody leave behind a former or current longterm relationship without getting told, “But it’s been years, so you belong with him forever/were meant to be with him.”

Mick wanted Zeke. She chose Zeke. I think that’s a good indicator of whom the love of her life is.

In S01E13, Mick tells him that she wished she could redo her re-entry into 2018 but wasn’t sure what she would’ve done to change the way her situation at home turned out.

In S02E01, Zeke tells Mick he wished he’d met her some other way in some other time. (Edit: With Jeff implicitly saying he always knew how he wanted the story to end, and explicitly confirming that Zekaela was always the plan from the very beginning, along with Matt implicitly saying they were written as soulmates since before he got the role, Zeke’s line is now major foreshadowing).

In S04E19, Mick tells Ben she doesn’t regret taking a later flight because it led her to Zeke.

It’s very telling. Ben’s heart belongs with Grace, and Mick’s heart belongs with Zeke.

“She would’ve married Jared if Flight 828 landed in its proper timeline in the Pilot episode”

There’d be no show to watch if the plane landed in 2013, for one thing.

Those 5 years gave Mick an experience where she learned what and whom she really wanted, without the enormous pressure of immediately accepting a proposal, and she also got the opportunity to meet her real soulmate. It’s okay to not want the same thing you wanted a few years ago. It’s called growth.

~~~

“Mick only stayed married to Zeke, after he survived his Death Date, out of pity and duty (because he survived, and she expected him to die)”

I remember seeing a remark like this, and you must dislike or hate Mick if you think she’s like that. Even as a joke, that’s just cruel.

Mick was so happy and relieved when Zeke survived his Death Date. She loves Zeke, or did you just close your eyes to their whole love story?

She told him she’d continue to choose him even if he had one day left, or ten thousand left. And with or without empath powers, Zeke knew she loved him too.

“But she still had feelings for Jared”

Okay, and? Even if the situation were reverse, she’d also still have feelings for Zeke. It works both ways.

And as Mick told him, she chose him instead of Jared. Sure, she loved Jared, but as Zeke told Mick in S04E02, her huge heart has room enough for anyone who’s lucky to be loved by her. Loving Zeke doesn’t mean she has to stop loving anyone else in her life. Love isn’t limited.

It’s canon that the only way she could choose Jared is if Zeke is dead. He didn’t look happy at all when he saw Zeke survived.

Just because you love someone doesn’t mean they’re the one for you. She chose Zeke.

~~~

“The writers only made Drea pregnant to put her and Jared together”

Do I need to be petty and remind y’all that pregnancy happens when two people regularly have sex, and protection isn’t always a 100% guarantee? 😶

Jared and Drea match really well, that was quite clear when they first got together. Their relationship grew organically. Just take off your blinders. Even Mick could see that Drea is perfect for him.

It helped Mick to see that Jared was compromising his happiness by being with her. She didn’t want children, and she was confronted with the fact that they could never have a full life together, not without compromising her vision for her own life.

By the way, that breakup post-reset was made before she remembered Zeke telling her about one of their almost-meetups where he was a cab driver at the airport on the night Flight 828 was supposed to land. So, it was fully her choice to end things with Jared going forward and starting anew; Zeke didn’t even need to be alive for her to choose that for herself. But she was so happy when she remembered. If you truly like the character, her choice makes complete sense narratively and character-wise.

~~~

“But Jared and Mick have more chemistry”

If arguing and fighting is chemistry, then yeah. Don’t get me wrong, I do think JR and Melissa have chemistry outside of angst and volatile tension, but if you think “more chemistry” is a reason why a fictional couple should be endgame, you have a juvenile view of an adult romance. This ain’t a teen drama. So, congrats, what a way to reveal you don’t care about the story or a cohesive narrative! 👀

Zekaela have a calmer romantic chemistry, and their sweet love story is so much better than Jachaela’s constant tension-filled drama where Jared put on tantrums when she wouldn’t give in to him. Their story up until Season 4 was volatile in a bad way, which only went away when Jared stopped chasing after her and let her live peacefully married to Zeke. I’m glad his character got better, thank goodness!

And don’t even get me started with “We won in real-life because JR (Jared) and Melissa (Mick) are together,” because we’re here for the TV show, not real-life. It’s entertainment, so chill out.

~~~

I think that 2013-Jared calling off his proposal to Mick, because it was for the wrong reason (“to help you get past [Evie’s death]”), isn’t forced/lazy writing.

Consider for a minute that, in 2013, he’s not the character you were introduced to in Season 1 (the now-former 2018 timeline). He’s not unhealthily obsessed with her like the Joker is with Batman, or Eobard Thawne is with The Flash. And he never got the trauma from losing someone in a perceived airplane accident. As for his breakup, he got time to think, and ultimately he didn’t want to take advantage of her in a vulnerable state.

And consider for a moment, at the time, 2013-Mick was grieving and didn’t believe she deserved happiness – and it’s been a year since Evie’s death. I don’t imagine there were many smiles and laughter for the past year in their relationship, meaning it was dying. So, Jared not being heartbroken over 2024-Mick’s breakup kinda makes sense.

To him, Mick broke up with him because she wasn’t gonna heal any time soon, and wanted him to move on with someone who can give him what she can’t.

But to her, Mick grew in those 5 years since getting on Flight 828 the first time, and the life she thought she wanted back then isn’t the same anymore (and that’s okay, we’re not the same person we were half a decade ago) and she got to meet the real love of her life whom she can be with now. Zeke.

I don’t believe love is a choice, because you can’t force yourself to love or not to love someone. But I believe happiness is a choice, you can choose to walk towards it or away from it. Mick walked towards happiness by choosing Zeke. It’s really beautiful.

~~~

Credit for most of the Manifest screenshots and tweets go to @gracestone

#manifest #zekaela #soulmates #michaela and zeke #narratively mick and zeke were always meant to be together #series finale #manifest spoilers #jared vasquez #michaela stone #zeke landon #written in the stars #true love #it’s all connected #manifest s4 #manifest finale

118 notes · View notes

wittlesissyb4by · 2 months

Text

Chapter 2 (Preview)

“Oh my god you feel so good!!”

Jake had always been good with his tongue. If you wanted to stay in diapers and limit your wife’s access to your cock, you had to learn to use other parts of your anatomy. Jake never needed much coaching, though. He was quite the natural. Still, a few clicks of the remote kicked both his tongue and the plug up his ass into high gear.

“Mmmphh!!” He groaned beneath me. His humming sent ripples through my legs that were sandwiching his face. I could feel my juices raining down his chin. The warmth of his tongue dancing through my labia and circling my clit. I smushed his nose inward as I ground against his face, straddling him in the 69 position.

“Awww fuck yea!” I moaned, one hand mushing against his diaper, the other pressing buttons on the remote. I’m not really sure what was happening in there, but the mechanical whirring told me the plug was oscillating with different types of thrusts. That, and the base of his diaper was swelling and deflating, swelling and deflating with every press of the plug in and out. It seemed to be working, his cock was hard inside the padding again, and his legs were clenching and writhing, his diaper crinkling incessantly. “You like that, diaper bitch?!”

…I get very vulgar when I’m horny…

Still, he managed to nod between my thighs.

“Lick my ass!” I ordered. I could feel him reposition, tongue migrating from one hole to the other. I wasn’t the biggest fan of getting my ass eaten, it felt fine, but I much more enjoyed the feeling of him submitting to me. I used the time to tickle his diaper, using my hand between his legs to shove the plug further in and grope his crotch at the same time.

“I’m going to cum,” I told him, positioning my pussy back over his mouth in the right spot. “Keep that same pace and spot, do not stop.” I told him.

Too many men think you have to speed up whatever it is you're doing in order to make a woman cum. For most women, that’s not exactly true. We like steady, consistent stimulation. Once Jake found the right area, I locked him in with my legs. He knew what that meant by now. I probably should have let him up for air first but…he’ll survive.

His nose whistled as he tried to breathe while still maintaining the rhythm with his tongue. I gripped his knees, his diaper, his thighs, the sheets, his knees again as I felt myself rising to climax. I never know what to do with my hands when my orgasm builds. I know even less of what to do when the orgasm finally hits.

Poor Jake must have felt like his head was trapped in a vice. My legs squeezed and convulsed as the mind-numbing orgasm coursed through me. When I finally came to, my head was resting on his diaper. I didn’t tell him that I’d drooled a little on the front.

“Whew…” I sighed, climbing off of him. “That was fantastic!”

Jake smiled triumphantly, always happy and willing to bring me to orgasm…even if it wasn’t from his pokey parts. “I’m glad you enjoyed yourself!” He said, groaning and tugging at his bonds, “But can you untie me now?”

“Why the fuck would I do that?”

He did a double take. He wasn’t expecting me to use that tone. His tone changed too, back into that high, submissive little pitch. “Wh-watta you mean?”

“I’m not done with you.” I said, tapping the remote so the plug sprang back to life. He flinched and whimpered, kicking his legs in a little tantrum.

“Hold still!” I barked, and he immediately halted, legs plopping back down to the mattress. I pulled the straps from beneath the mattress and used them to cinch his ankles so that he was spread eagle in nothing but his diaper.

“There!” I said, satisfied. My legs were still a little weak as I sauntered back to the bathroom.

“Where are you going?” he asked.

“I’m gonna finish getting ready.” I said simply.

“I thought there wasn’t a dinner? I thought we weren’t going out tonight?”

“No…” I corrected, picking up my straightener, “you aren’t going out tonight.”

It took him a second to process.

“So, what are you going to tell Mark and Ryan if I’m not there?”

“They’re not going either.” I grinned, “Just us girls.”

That seemed to appease him. He was quiet for a while as I finished my hair and worked on my make-up.

“So are you just going to…leave me here?” He asked, “Like this…?”

“Yep.” I managed to say while applying lip gloss.

He was quiet again. I couldn’t tell if he was excited about the concept, or concerned. I didn’t really care.

“Which one?” I asked, holding up a red dress, and a black one.

“Red.” He said. I smiled, knowing that would be his answer. He always liked me in the red. “I’d ask you to zip me up but…”

We both giggled at that. I gave him another press of the buttons, this combo seemed to hit just the right spot because his eyes migrated backwards almost instantly.

Back in the bathroom, I checked my figure in the mirror. Usually I don’t like to toot my own horn, but I looked hot. The workouts I’d been doing were really paying off, and my boobs looked great in this dress. I was searching my closet for the right shoes when suddenly Jake let out a wail.

“What? What is it??” I asked, scrambling back into the room. He sounded like he was in pain. I rushed over to check on him, but quickly realized he wasn’t in agony, he was in ecstasy.

“Are you cumming? Again??”

He nodded, or tried to, his breath came out uneven. He tugged at his bonds. Writhed back and forth, then collapsed.

I clicked the remote off. Checking his diaper again.

“At this rate, you’re gonna turn the indicator blue with just your goo goo!”

He chuckled, still catching his breath. When he finally managed to peek an eye open, he looked me up and down.

“Wow! You look…gorgeous!”

I smiled because I knew he meant it. He wasn’t horny anymore and he knew he didn’t have a chance of getting some.

“Thank you, baby!” I said, patting his diaper. It was plumper and warmer than expected. “Uh..did you just go pee pee?”

He blushed, giving that adorable, innocent little smirk.

I giggled, giving him a playful boop on his nose. “Alright pissy pamps, I’m gonna head out soon.”

“Okay Mommy.” He said in that sweet little baby voice.

I grabbed my pumps, slipped them on, and gave myself one final check in the mirror.

When I was satisfied that I didn’t look like a troll, I came to the side of the bed and planted a kiss on his forehead.

But before I could leave, he had one more question on his mind. “Are you…gonna meet anyone tonight?”

“I wasn’t planning on it.”

“Oh…” he said, but not in a relieved sort of way, more like he was disappointed.

“Do you want me to meet someone tonight?”

“No…” he said, side-eying and squishing in his diaper in a way that really meant ‘yes’.

I smiled and pinched his little cheek. “I’ll try to meet a big stwong man for you, wittle baby!” I cooed. That instantly made him light up.

“Okay!! Good luck!” He said, genuinely meaning it.

“You be a good boy okay? Don’t go taking off your diaper, I want that thing nice and soggy by the time I get back! You hear me?”

“Yes Mommy!”

“Oh..and one more thing…”

I went down to his feet. He still had those stupid checkered socks on. I peeled one of them off and balled it up, shoving it into his mouth. “This stays here to keep you quiet. Understand?”

He nodded, a bit put off by the taste.

Another kiss on the forehead, another boop on the nose, another click of the button.

“I’ll see you when I get back…if I get back.”

He mumbled something in response, but it was too muffled to understand, and probably wasn’t all that important anyway.

*******

“Oh my god you look amazing!” Callie exclaimed, kissing me on the cheek.

Amanda arrived shortly after, saying the same. We complemented each other and exchanged small talk before grabbing our vodka cranberry sodas from the bar.

“So what’s Jake doing tonight?” Callie asked as we sat down.

“I dunno,” I shrugged, trying my best to hide my mischievous smirk, “probably tied down with something, I’m sure.”

“Probably playing video games.” Callie scoffed, “I don’t get it. I really don’t. All Mark can talk about lately is something called Helldrivers.”

“Maybe he should binge-watch hours of Real Housewives like you then, Callie!” Amanda giggled pointedly.

Callie tipped her glass, conceding, “touche.”

“Ryan doesn’t play video games.” Amanda smiled, “he prefers reading and—“

“Maintaining the house and garden.” Both Callie and I finished, verbatim. We’d heard it a thousand times. “We get it, you have a great husband.”

Amanda flushed innocently.

Speaking of, I swiped through my phone while the girls continued to make conversation. The app was hidden in one of my discreet folders. I tapped it open. I don’t use it often, it’s more for Jake. We installed cameras in the room a while back so he could watch me while I had some fun with other men. His idea. I barely ever used the monitoring system, not unless we were on a weekend trip and I needed to check on the dog.

Through the grainy video I could see Jake lying spread eagle in nothing but his diaper and tie. He still had the sock in his mouth, and was giving the smallest of wriggles to try and get comfortable in his probably soggy diaper.

I reached into my purse and clicked the button on the remote. He immediately jumped, taken by surprise and then a mixture of pleasure and pain. His arms tensed against their bonds, his legs wriggled. I smirked to myself as I watched him squirm, pressing a few more buttons.

“Lyss?”

“Huh?” I jerked my head up, realizing I’d been off in my own world.

“Did you need another drink?”

“Oh…uh…” I swirled my glass around, the color drained, only ice left behind. “Yes…please!”

“Will you watch our stuff?” Amanda asked, brushing herself off.

I nodded in the affirmative, still a bit distracted. When they finally left, I turned back to my phone, like I was playing an addicting little game. Which..wasn’t too far from the truth.

I pressed more buttons, watching him squirm and fidget with delight. I pressed the button to the microphone on the cameras, then brought my phone to my lips, “are you doing okay, hunny?”

He startled again from my voice reverberating through the cameras, then moved his head up and down for a ‘yes’.

“How’s your diaper?” I asked, looking at the people scattered around outside the bar. “Did you go pee pee?”

Again he nodded, several times, as if to indicate he had done it several times. I clicked the buttons again. “Good boy! Mommy can’t wait to get home and—“

“Is that…Jake??” Callie gasped behind me, walking by with the drinks in hand. She’d glanced at my phone at first, but now she was leaning over my shoulder for a better look. I quickly powered the screen off, but it was too late.

I fumbled for words, but all that came out was a mumbled jumble.

“Was he…was he wearing a diaper??” She exclaimed incredulously.

“I…he…no.” But there was no denying it, the big diaper was on clear display. Damn it, why did we have to get such high quality cameras?? Callie crooked an eyebrow with a disbelieving look. “Okay…fine.” I said, no sense in hiding it. “Yes…he’s in a diaper.”

“That’s sooo weird!” Amanda cringed.

“It’s not weird…“ I said defensively, but shrugged, “okay…it is a little weird but—“

“I think men are weird.” Callie said simply, not seeming nearly as phased as Amanda was. “All of them have some weird kink or another.”

“That’s not true!” Amanda declared, “Ryan doesn’t have any!”

Callie scoffed, “Oh he does honey, you just don’t know what it is yet.”

Amanda flushed, looking a little contemplative as she sipped her drink.

“What is Mark’s?” I asked, happy to shift the focus off of me.

“Feet.” Callie said simply, sipping her own drink. “Drives him crazy.”

“Ewww! Gross!” Amanda shrieked, “you suck his toes??”

“Absolutely not,” Callie laughed, “just cause he has the fetish doesn’t mean I do. But I'm happy to say I am the recipient of a foot massage every single night.”

Amanda and I both groaned in jealousy.

But I had to ask: “How do you make him…?”

“Cum?” Callie finished for me, unperturbed by the prying questions, discussing it as if she were explaining her methods for texturing walls. “Well…let’s just say I don’t get these calves from the gym. Footjobs are quite the workout!!”

We all laughed, even Amanda, who seemed to be loosening up to the notion after seeing us speak so freely.

“So he wears diapers?” Callie asked, shifting back to me.

I took a large swig of my drink, ignoring the straw, and nodded. “Not all the time,” I clarified, “about once a week.”

“Does he…use them?” Amanda asked, turning up her nose.

“Oh yea.” I nodded, neglecting to tell them about how soaked the current one probably was.

“Ewww!!” Amanda exclaimed, even though Callie still looked indifferent, “and you…change him?”

“Not if he’s messy.” I said, shrugging and sipping my drink again, “I don’t change poopy diapers.”

Amanda seemed to find a little bit of solace in that. She still turned up her nose though, maybe she was imagining the smell of a grown man’s dirty diaper.

“So what’s the remote for?” Callie asked, inclining her head curiously.

“Oh…” I said, blushing, forgetting the device that had hit the floor when the girls had startled me. I leaned over to pick it up. “It…controls his plug.”

“Controls it?” Callie inquired, “like…vibrations?”

I nodded, smiling. “Mhmm! And this one goes in and out too!”

Amanda looked perplexed. “Plug? What are you guys talking about? Where is this ‘plug’?”

“Up his butt, girl!” Callie intoned, chuckling at Amanda’s innocence when she clapped a hand over her mouth, clutching her imaginary pearls. Callie held her hand out and wiggled her fingers. “Can I see it?”

She was referring to my phone, wanting to get a better look at Jake sprawled out on the bed in his diaper. She giggled and took the scene in, commenting on how cute and pathetic he looked. I couldn’t help but agree.

“And you can control it from all the way over here?” She asked after I handed her the remote. I had a feeling Jake would not object to the matter at all.

“Yep! And you can talk to him too!” I said, proud of Jake and I’s technological prowess.

Callie seemed very excited about that idea, she pressed the button to the microphone and spoke into it. “Hey Jakey!” She said in a snide, patronizing tone. Jake immediately jumped, startled that the voice coming through the cameras was not that of his wife. “I like your diapers!!”

_______________________

If you would like to read the rest of this story, or you missed Chapter 1, head on over to Subscribestar to get the full release! The girls are going to have lots of fun with their new toy!

46 notes · View notes