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astonmartinii · 6 months

Text

nonsense... or is it? | charles leclerc social media au

pairing: charles leclerc x fem singer!reader

face claim: sabrina carpenter

based on this request: sooo, anyways,,, i was thinking maybe a smau where Charles is playing the guy who Milo was and this obviously breaks the internet even more and this leads to them dating ??? idk, just like a really wholesome one where she was his celebrity crush and now they're dating bc of them getting know each other more bc of the music video. sorry if this is all over the place but yeah. - @whoreks

MASTERLIST | BUY ME A KO-FI?

yourusername

liked by taylorswift, charles_leclerc and 1,200,441 others

yourusername: holla babes !!! the feather music video is heading your way fast xxx if only my real boyfriends were like my music videos ones ...

view all comments

user1: MOTHER

user2: finally music videos are back baby !!

taylorswift: you can still make the whole place shimmer ✨

yourusername: thanks to you baby

user3: oh to be able to call taylor swift baby

user4: y/n's shade is so underrated - i too wish her boyfriends were as good as her mv ones

user5: she's got such a good eye for casting why can't she do this in her actual love life

user6: okay but he's hot based off a single shoulder i'm excited

user7: you got that from a SHOULDER?

user8: he's TALL?

user9: babe y/n is like 4'2 she makes everyone look tall

user10: say what you want about the catholic church, they got the aesthetic down pat

yourbff1: so we aren't asking the mv boyf out? boring.

yourusername: we have lil things called phones? USE IT HOE

user11: charles leclerc in the likes

user12: so true of him

user13: unless he's... the guy

user14: babe he's way too short lol

user15: have yall seen the sky ad? baby aint acting any time soon

yourusername

liked by yourbff1, charles_leclerc and 1,763,550 others

tagged: charles_leclerc

yourusername: OMG you guys blew the feather music video up !! i'm sure it had nothing to do with this random guy i found off the street? jokes, thank you charles for being the perf mv boyf xx

view all comments

user17: HOLY FUCKING SHIT

user18: celeb crush inception no one touch me

charles_leclerc: thank you for my music video debut, maybe you can return the favour one day?

yourusername: i'll return any favour you want

yourbff1: dial down the desperation babe

charles_leclerc: what if i want her to dial it up please?

yourbff1: do NOT encourage her

yourusername: please encourage me :)

user19: Y/N STAND UP PLEASE

user20: actually y/n is so real have yall seen that man YUM

liked by yourusername

user21: y/n is a genius for fancasting her future bf in her music video

danielricciardo: THIS IS HOW I FIND OUT? SHARL WHEN I CATCH YOU

pierregasly: and me :( i thought our friendship meant more ....

charles_leclerc: it was a secret

yourusername: he doesn't kiss and tell xoxo

alexalbon: WHAT ??????

charles_leclerc: okay we can stop joking now

yourusername: fine...

user22: the way charles was defo typing that through tears

user23: y/n make the move we believe in you

user24: believe in her? she can get anyone she wants he's gotta STEP UP

charles_leclerc

liked by landonorris, yourusername and 2,099,441 others

tagged: yourusername

charles_leclerc: had a blast filming for my first ever music video, thank you y/n !!

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user25: i'm feeling a new unhealthy attachment forming

yourusername: feel free to come back any time soon

charles_leclerc: or maybe you can come to me?

yourusername: is this my paddock debut?

charles_leclerc: make sure you're wearing red and it sure can be

yourusername: let me check the wardrobe

user26: i will pass away if we get y/n at a race... in the ferrari garage ???

pierregasly: let it be known i am still angry that you didn't tell me, especially after all the weird rants i've listened to

alexalbon: me too

georgerussell63: me too

landonorris: me too

danielricciardo: me too

carlossainz55: me too

maxverstappen1: me too

charles_leclerc: why is max here?

maxverstappen1: that's what you're taking from this?

charles_leclerc: yeah why are you in my business

maxverstappen1: you make it my business you talk about her all the time

yourusername: oh really ???

charles_leclerc: HE'S A BIG FAT LIAR HE'S ALWAYS BEEN A BIG FAT LIAR ALL HIS LIFE INCLUDING WHEN I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY PUSHED HIM IN A PUDDLE

maxverstappen1: YOU DID PUSH ME IN THAT PUDDLE

yourusername: what is going on here?

user27: poor y/n being thrown into the grid drama

user28: poor charles with the grid trying to expose him

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc and 1,334,661 others

yourusername: clearly was feeling myself this week

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user31: lol why is max here

maxverstappen1: doing my due diligence as an investigative journalist

charles_leclerc: choke.

user32: is that charles? are we in the soft launch?

user33: let's not get ahead of ourselves, we know charles doesn't dress that well

user34: consider this: girlfriend effect

user35: girlfriend effect is gonna have to do some heavy lifting when it comes to charles' wardrobe

yourbff1: you think you're so slick don't you

yourusername: maybe. maybe not?

yourbff1: you're so annoying

yourusername: annoyingly cute?

liked by charles_leclerc

yourbff1: keep your nose out of women's business leclerc

charles_leclerc: SLANDER

user36: i mean they seem to have the same sense of humour

user37: not to sound insane but they are perfect for each other and i will be passing away if they are not together

pierregasly: interesting

danielricciardo: add it to the folder

charles_leclerc: folder ???

maxverstappen1: leave us journalists be

charles_leclerc: can you even read?

yourusername: GET HER JADE

maxverstappen1: add that as well

charles_leclerc: why can't we win?

user38: what is going on in the house of commons

charles_leclerc

liked by pierregasly, yourusername and 2,331,663 others

tagged: yourusername

charles_leclerc: i don't believe in soft launches

view all comments

user39: we been knew... but OMG PARENTS

user40: i am crying they're so hot

yourusername: hawt bf obtained

charles_leclerc: sexy gf in my inventory

yourusername: you're such a cute patootie

charles_leclerc: i cannot speak my mind or instagram will censor me

yourusername: ...oop hurry up and come back :(

charles_leclerc: about to break all US speeding laws xoxo

yourusername: not you in your charli xcx era

user41: he's with her ... in the US ... could we get y/n paddock debut in vegas ???

user42: would only be right i fear

user43: the scheduling just about makes sense before she has to go back to opening for taylor in south america

user44: now why did vegas not get in their bag and get y/n to perform at the opening ceremony?

pierregasly: way to ruin the investigation

danielricciardo: yeah we were in our sherlock holmes era

maxverstappen1: have to spoil everything don't you charles 🤨

charles_leclerc: i thought you guys wanted to know who my girlfriend is?

alexalbon: yes, but we wanted to expose it :(

yourusername: CORNY

pierregasly: oh no. he has someone on his side now

yourusername: damn right frenchie. i can hear your asshole twitching from here

pierregasly: WHAT ???

charles_leclerc: idk what that means but YEAH PIERRE TAKE THAT

charles_leclerc

liked by carlossainz55, yourusername and 2,114,762 others

tagged: yourusername

charles_leclerc: gutted not to be on the top step but an overall great weekend in vegas. glad to have y/n by my side this weekend before she's off again to slay the stage xx

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user48: charles unironically using the word slay, the girlfriend effect knows no bounds

user49: the sky camera zooming in on y/n watching the podium

user50: i think we watched her fall in love in real time

user51: i mean look at the material... podium charles hits so different i think I FELL IN LOVE

yourusername: you're a winner to me babe

charles_leclerc: and that's all that matters

yourusername: NOPE STAY HUNGRY GET THEM POINTS AND DESTROY THE REST OF THE FIELD

charles_leclerc: okay :)

yourusername: good boy

pierregasly: never say that in public again

maxverstappen1: is this why he's blushing so much in the press conference?

charles_leclerc: NO. NO REASON

yourusername: you sure?

charles_leclerc: i am the unluckiest driver ever and am screwed over at every turn sue me if i like a lil praise

user52: charles is so real for that i also want y/n to tell me i'm doing a good job

alexalbon: enough time has passed. @yourusername can lily get some extra tickets for the eras tour

yourusername: of course. anything for my new bestie

lilymunhe: thank youuuuuuuuuuuuuu. charles you have amazing taste

charles_leclerc: i know :)

yourusername: i mean i got you, so who's the real winner here?

yourusername

liked by taylorswift, charles_leclerc and 1,667,982 others

tagged: charles_leclerc & taylorswift

yourusername: my leg of the eras tour has come to an end :( this was such an insane opportunity, thank you so much taylor xx but this also means i can go annoy charlie until he has to go back to work !!

one last nonsense outro:

i met this lovely boy named charlie,

he races round the world for ferrari,

giving it to me everyday like ari

view all comments

user53: i think y/n might actually be winning in life

user54: is she referencing everyday by ariana grande which is literally just a song about having constant sex?

yourusername: yes and what about it? f1 drivers have great stamina

arthurleclerc: DELETE ASAP

yourusername: no can do baby leclerc

user55: fave outro for real

charles_leclerc: i am blushing !!

pierregasly: she just told millions of people all you do is fuck and now you're blushing ???

yourusername: i don't think mr doggy emoji is talking right now

charles_leclerc: at least y/n did it in an artful way

pierregasly: believe me i know YOU WON'T STOP SINGING IT DOWN THE PHONE YOU MENACE

yourusername: you sing my songs :) ?

carlossainz55: ALL THE TIME

yourusername: i don't like your tone mr 🤨

charles_leclerc: i am just showing my love :(

yourusername: @pierregasly @carlossainz55 you made him sad APOLOGIZE IMMEDIATELY

pierregasly: sorry?

carlossainz55: sorry i guess?

charles_leclerc: thank you :) i shall continue to sing to my heart's content

yourusername: good.

taylorswift: you were amazing !! i'll see you soon my love xx

yourusername: i'm hearing double date ??

taylorswift: i'm sure that can be arranged

charles_leclerc: OMG

user56: charles and travis are really the top tier himbo bfs and i love them for that

fin.

note: i really loved writing this so i hope this was everything you imagined and more!! i'm just getting into sabrina's music but i was a girl meets world stan so... i hope i did the nonsense outro justice xxx

#f1 imagine #f1 x reader #f1 instagram au #f1 x you #f1 #f1 social media au #charles leclerc imagine #charles leclerc instagram au #charles leclerc instagram edit #charles leclerc x you #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc #charles leclerc fanfic

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tickfleato · 5 months

Text

how to make cool blobby turing patterns in photoshop

i'll preface with i learned the basic loop from skimming a tutorial on youtube, but as someone who prefers written tutorials i'm sure many would appreciate one! also, the second part of this is some of the visual effects i figured out on my own using blending modes and stuff.

i'm using photoshop CS4 on a mac so some buttons and stuff might be in different places on windows and newer photoshop versions but all the actions are the same. my canvas is 1000x1000 pixels.

UPDATES (i'm hoping these'll show up whenever you open the readmore?)

it's possible to do something similar in krita using this plugin, made by the love @arcaedex

it's also possible to do this in photopea, a free browser alternative to photoshop! the results are pretty much identical.

FIRST off you wanna get or make a black and white image of some kind. it has to be one layer. can be noise, a photo, a bunch of lines, whatever. here's mine, just some quick airbrush lines:

now find the actions tab. idk what it looks like in newer versions of photoshop but you probably won't need to dig!

hit the little page thingy to make a new pattern. once you hit 'record', it'll record everything you do. the little square 'stop' icon will end it.

now you want to do a high pass filter. you can mess around with the radius to change the size of your squiggles, but the tutorial had it set to 6. experiment!

now add the 'threshold' adjustment layer. i use the adjustments tab but i think there's also a dropdown menu somewhere. keep it at the default, 128. merge it down. (control or command + E or you can right click it like some kind of weirdo)

and finally, the gaussian blur! the radius of this affects the shape and size of your squiggles as well. i like to keep it around 4.5 but you can mess around with that too.

after that, hit 'stop' on the action you're recording, and then repeat it a bunch of times using the 'play' button, until you have something you like, like this:

WOW!! that was fun!! and only a little tedious thanks to the power of macros. anyway, here's some fun layer blending stuff i like to do. it's with a different pattern cause i made this bit first.

anyway, using a black and white gradient (or a grey base that you do black and white airbrush on), make a layer with the vivid light. this will make the blobs look thicker or thinner.

then, for cool colors, do a gradient map adjustment layer over that:

and finally, my best friend, the overlay layer. just using a gradient here bc i'm lazy, but feel free to experiment with brushes, colors, and blending modes!

NOW GO. MAKE COOL SHIT WITH THE POWER OF MATH. AND SEND IT TO ME

also these are not hard and fast rules PLEASE mess around with them to see what kind of weird shit you can make. here's a gif. as you can see i added some random airblush blobs in the middle of it, for fun.

#photoshop #turing pattern #tutorial #photoshop tutorial #abstract art #reaction diffusion pattern

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lowkeyrobin · 2 months

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MCYT with a reader who would literally get into a fist fight for them?? Literally, if someone even looks at them wrong reader will throw hands. It's literally that meme (Random person) "GET YO FUCKING DOG BITCH" (MCYT) "it don't bite" "YES IT FUCKIN DO-" I'm sorry I'm feeling silly 😔

OH MY FUCKING GOD I LOVE THIS PROMPT AND THE REFERENCE TO THIS MEME LMFAOOO OH MY LORD BSHWJRHEJJAJW ; very vine oriented so I apologize. you threw me into a loop referencing that

MCYT ; "anytime, anywhere, I'd beat a bitches ass for you"

includes ; tommyinnit, tubbo, ranboo, badlinu, nihachu, slimecicle, quackity, & foolish gamers

warnings ; language, talk of blood/injuries, physical fighting, vine cringe because I got very carried away and you can tell

masterlist

TOMMYINNIT

he was one of those kids in high school that made light offensive jokes but would never fight anyone over anything, he's not a violent person at all other than in his jokes

but God forbid some random person look at you two weird in public, you're on their ass

you're more offended that they were judging Tommy at all, you couldn't care that they were judging you

"sorry, do you have a problem?" You squint your eyes at the person, "me and my boyfriend are just trying to shop and you keep following us around and staring, like, can I help you?"

just a teenage Karen

yall do take it outside when the motherfucker follows you out and begins to record you

you beat this fuckers ass to a PULP

Tommy's just holding the few bags of stuff you'd purchased staring down, jaw on the fucking floor like "Oh my God wtf do I do"

he had the vlog camera on so he kinda got it all on video before he pulled you away from the person

yall sprinted the hell away bc the security guards were running towards yall 😭😭

#neveridentified

#the person admitted guilt anyways and said they were planning to hurt you so no point in trying to track yall down for self defense

#i barely know the law shush

TUBBO

he physically has to hold you back from fighting people

"y/n, it's fine. they just want a reaction"

"let me beat them up!"

the other person's like "yo wtf is wrong with you????"

"sorry, my partner acts like a hostile animal when people piss them off, sorry"

he appreciates you defending him though, he does like using you as a weapon because he thinks it's funny

I mean at least you guys don't have to worry about getting kidnapped or anything because you'll be there to kick the motherfuckers ass

"GET YO FUCKING DOG BITCH"

"Oh they don't bite, it's okay 🥰"

"YES THEY FUCKIN DO HELP"

RANBOO

they just kind of accepted that you were like this

"I do not endorse violence unless you are y/n. I can't make them un-violent. I have tried, they're a vicious guard dog now"

hurricane Katrina? more like hurricane tortilla when you enter the building

yk the free style dance teacher vine? that'll be ranboo out in public and someone will stare at them all weird and you'll glare back

"walk away, walk away" you mumble, watching the person hurrily walk away as they see you like glaring daggers into their skull

your dynamic is the one vine that's like "Oh can I have a sip of your water?" and "It's not water or vodka, it's vinegar" "bitch what"

then you'll go make angsty edge lord posts to the one bojack horseman audio "I'm not a violent dog" and insert a clip of you beating the shit out of someone in high school

FREDDIE BADLINU

you post the "look at all those chickens" vine on your Twitter everytime you see a hate comment made for one of you

you love instigating fights w people online it's the funniest fucking thing

if you don't know how to reply to some dumbass edgelord response you'll just spam the guacamole vine until they shut up

"wait, why does y/n have so many soaps?"

"MIND YOUR FUCKIN BUISNESS DAVID"

Freddie's response to your violence is usually the saxophone seal vine. he genuinely laughs everytime he sees you fighting w someone online

sometimes you'll stream it while you wait for a response and while you're fighting online trolls who've been brainwashed by Twitter

"You're gay?!?!?!?11??11"

insert the "ms keisha dead" vine and the battle is over idk what to say

fight fire with fire I guess

NIKI NIHACHU

she hates yet loves that you'd fight ppl for her

oh, someone treated her wrong? you'll be trending on Twitter for fighting the person

#y/u/n will literally be at number 1 for a week

people edit the fight too

she appreciates it though, even though she doesn't exactly like to promote violence, she'll accept it from you

"Oh, don't worry about them, they're just a little... nervous around people sometimes"

"nervous? girl that mf is SNARLING at me"

you'll see a post that's like "me when someone tries to start shit w my s/o" and reply with the "hahaha I do that" vine

when I tell you she CACKLES reading online fights with people 😭🙏

CHARLIE SLIMECICLE

"get the F off my yard!" proceeds to have to drag you away from situations where someone's actin a little funny in a /neg way

he genuinely thinks you fighting people for him is funny

he'll tell the stories on stream and to his friends like "dude they fucked this guy up, I honestly feel bad for laughing"

honestly most the time it's people victimizing themselves

like that one meme where the lady very obviously and fakely falls over that bench on LIVE TELEVISION.

he's your biggest supporter

he's the old guy from that one vine of the kid singing "Oh wait a minute mister postman" and he does the whole ass high note

"here's y/n fighting someone for idk what because they're talking to the police 😋"

you're a problem at this point

QUACKITY

you've physically fought so many wild racists for him it's crazy

he'll gladly cheer you on

"AHHHH COME GET YO DOG BRO HELP"

"Oh it don't bite"

you proceed to bite the bitch

online fights are usually responded w the purple teletubby twerking meme

"L don't be a weak ass racist pussy next time"

you fight Logan Paul for some reason??? Twitter drama mostly

don't worry quackitys there to watch

17-3 don't worry... ehehehrhahahha

when he tells you that you need to stop instigating fights you send him the "They ask you how you are but you just have to say that you're fine when you're not really fine" meme BAHDNHAHA

FOOLISH GAMERS

"YOU KNOW WHAT DUDE? IM OUTTA HERE" vine in a nutshell with you two. I can't explain this but it makes sense I swear

"whatd you do to your eyebrows?" meme except its "Whyd you fight that person!?" "I don't really know!"

Twitter fights are like "and they were roommates!" "ohmygodtheywereroomates" I swear to fucking god

you love instigating shit with Twitter trolls

when you stand up for him/reply to edgelord haters for him he replies with the "country boy I love youuuuuuu" vine

"GIVE ME YOUR FUCKIN MONEY!" vine with the law and order intro is literallt how physical fights go

let's just say some stalker edgelords tracked you guys down at the streamer awards...

HE AND PUNZ GENUINLEY CHEER YOU ON

here you go trending on Twitter again

#lowkeyrobin #mcyt x reader #mcyt preferences #mcyt oneshot #tommyinnit x reader #quackity x reader #ranboo x reader #badlinu x reader #tubbo x reader #freddie badlinu x reader #niki nihachu x reader #nihachu x reader #foolish gamers x reader #charlie slimecicle x reader #slimecicle x reader #gn reader #gender neutral reader

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the-moon-files · 1 month

Note

Hi! I'm kinda new here but I was hoping to leave a request or at least something to chew on. So there's this genshin sagau where the reader has a bit of a language barrier with the other characters and I was wondering if that translated over to the Linked Universe as well? Like imagine the boys finding this random person with different clothes, accessories, and they talk in a language never before heard of? What are they, some kind of eldritch being? Meanwhile reader recognizes them obviously but frustratingly can't express any feelings asides from base concepts! Man.

Some funnies include; reader voicing more thoughts out loud now that no one can really understand them and reader eventually learning the language and getting a really sick accent out of it.

That's all my tired brain can think of atm so I bid you adieu. Have a good rest of your day :)

First Official Request!! :D oh and its amazinggg, ooOOO a language barrier AU, genshin? hm wonder who wrote that

Reader wasn’t specified and ive adopted masc!reader as the normal over here, so masc reader it is 👍

Sun: Masc/Male Reader (”you”/he/him)

Orbit: EXTRA LONG Headcanons-ish/scenarios SORRY 😭, Language Barrier AU my beloved

Stars: The Classic Chain of Links <3

Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: mild cussing, typical mild loz violence, & Trigger Warnings: none known.

Please comment if I missed any. /gen

so for the sake of even funnier confusion, lets say the boys kinda missed u falling thru a portal, and instead just see the portal, and it disappears w/nothing coming out

(bc u obv are a competent person and clearly recognize the giant horse head stable from Breath of the Wild and went inside, like to orient urself, u will NOT be a Y/N damsel in distress 💀)

the boys had already been heading to that stable to sleep for the night, and needless to say, u nearly have a fit LMAO

first, the Hero of Time walks in, then the Link from Hyrule Warriors, then from Link’s Awakening? Breath of the Wild/Tears of the Kingdom Link?? Wind Waker Link, Four Sword Link??? The original Legend of Zelda Link-!!!!

well at least u arent the only weirdly dressed person there

(well, u arent weird looking for the hylians in the stable, theyre used to this weird shit, but the Chain of heroes on the other hand…)

they get to observing their bunkmates for the night, subtly squinting at you, then turning to talk to each other, and slowly every link gets made aware of ur prescense, u didnt think u stood out that bad..

(”くいんねしらんらなすいそらきみについちみんらはかくちかまいていりすんはすらもんらなすいすち・”) *

it also quickly becomes obvious to every traveler in the stable that you either cant speak, or wont speak, as when ur exchanging money for rupees at the front desk, the owner is accommodating with you by pointing and grunting and ur just nodding and pointing back

well, its not like when u first greeted the guy u understood even a single thing the guy said, it sounded like some sub-dialect of Japanese or something

u had realized earlier with horror that the game was staying true to its creators, and that most likely everyone spoke a special version of Japanese and ur English ass was abt to be so lonely and confused 😭

Wars/Time/Sky/Four in particular clearly noticed u exchanging all ur currency, as u can see them whispering or glancing at you occasionally as u pocket ur now little green gems the size of coins, rather than strip of paper

(”しにしくいまなとかるるるみらかくちひいすなせいいと・てくらしらいとみゃかくちひいすなせいいと・かくちかくちとみゃかすいちりりんそくちみきいしらひいすかくいいすちとねくちとにかてにりし・”)

and the boys move on in the morning, and its acc torture for u bc u had no idea how to even begin to quell their suspicions enough to let you travel along with them

u think u could say u came out a portal, but.. how would tell them that? drawing pictures in the dirt?? 💀

and this just keeps happening.

even when u just try to admire from a distance or even outright just leave them to it and go off to explore Hyrule (as safe as u could after acquiring a weapon and some more clothes)

but its like fate (or maybe Hylia tbh) wants u to run into these legendary heroes (both kinda in ur world and definitely here) constantly

after the stable u manage to run into them in Kakariko Village, which wasnt crazy bc u needed more supplies, and it was the nearest town to the stable

ur sure they noticed, but u outright avoided them out of paranoia or making them paranoid u were following them, and u definitely saw who you thought was the hero of the Four Sword whisper about u as u walked by, not that u caught much

(”るるるかくちかゃとかくいとちもいとかすちみきいほりららのにみききなんはすらもかくいとかちこりいるていとくらなりしのいいせちみいんいらみくにもる”)

but you’d started to recognize some Japanese words! …and tbh anime is the only reason for that, something definitely like “watch, him” 💀

which rlly didnt make u feel any better, and u avoided them even harder, u bought a map, so u made sure to head in the opposite direction of them out of, lets be honest, kinda lowkey fear of what theyd do if they thought u were stalking them

but despite u trying to actively go away from them, either you, or them, would show up everywhere the other went,

you passed by Wind playing in the water in Zora’s Domain,

Twilight riding Epona around the plains in Central Hyrule, Sky hanging laundry outside Wild’s house in Hateno

Honest-to-fucking-god seeing Wars, Wild, and Legend all crossdress to sneak into Gerudo village- u cant fucking escape them-

and the worst part is, you cant understand anyone, other than some basic words atp 😭

its as the Chain come from a path that merges onto yours on the way to Rito Village when Legend snaps first

You’re not even surprised, tbh it was more surprising it took them so long 💀

(”にかゃとんらな!! ちきちにみ!!! てくんちすぃんらなはらりりらてにみきなと・くらてちすぃんらなはらりりらてにみきなと・・くらてちすぃてぃはらりりらてにみきんらな・・!!”)

the look on ur face must have drawn some pity from Twilight bc he’s trying to talk Legend out of his yelling and pointing his sword at you,

(”ひいかそちりもしらてみ! りにのいんらなとちにしねにかくにみのていゃひいちりとらとらもいくらてこいいみはらりりらてにみきかくいもからら!”)

Wars joins in, giving you a confused look, before talking to the group at large, most of which have their hands near their weapons, but dont look that inclined to use them, thank the fucking gods or whoever rules over Hyrule-

(”かくいすちみそくいすくちとちせらにみかねかくにとすいいのとらはもちきにそちみしにゃもとなすいにかゃとくんりにちゃとしらにみきるていとくらなりしまなとかかすんからかちりのからかくいもねといいにはかくいんゃすいいさせいすにいみそにみきちみんかくにみきとかすちみきいる”)

oh no. they want to talk you, you barely picked out in their argument

Time nods in agreement, before stepping forward to talk first, you cant even imagine how anxious u look rn lol

(”かくいらかくいすとちすいすにきくかねかくにとにとりらみきらひいすしないるもんみちもいにとかにもいねちみしかくいといちすいもんかすちひいりにみきそらもせちみにらみとねちとにゃもとなすいんらなゃひいきちかくいすいしはすらもなとすなみみにみきにみからいちそくらかくいすとらもなそくるてくちかゃとんらなすみちもい・”)

why has Hylia forsaken you. what did you do to not receive some sort of fancy natural translator power in ur brain or something after getting portaled here, its the least she could do for fucks sake- talking to someone in a diff. language is SO much harder than just listening to them to understand what theyre saying-

you desperately try to recall the words people have said at stables and whatnot when introducing themselves, before they realized you couldnt speak the same language

(”Uh… もんみちもいにと… and I’m not following you…とらすすん”)

you just try to say ur name and then say sorry LMAO 😭

Nearly every Link is staring at you bug-eyed in shock, confusion, and understanding all at once

the Chain’s attitude changes pretty quick after that, and they quickly connect the dots after, yes, u do a drawing of a portal in the dirt 💀

u gather from the few words u can get that it was indeed magic (probably Hylia) that kept shortcutting you and the group of heroes together over and over again

…

she can move your position in space time and yet she cant get u an auto-translator after being forced to be here.

(in the middle of u drawing to communicate Hyrule manages to understand the gist of what you meant by that and laughs)

the Chain are quick to be very accomdating, Wars/Sky/Wild all offering to try and better teach u their language, but in return they want to learn yours?

actually, that was smth u noticed pretty early on in the ensuing weeks of travel, was the fascination they had w/English and ur voice??

Wind constantly rambled at you and poked and smiled at you to try and get you to ramble back, and after getting more comfortable around them,

u start to talk like they cant understand a word ur saying, which is entirely accurate, and you notice some like to lean in when you talk, or respond with humming/saying smth like u can understand, or even just gesture for u to keep going

Four/Time/Legend?? surprisingly/Hyrule/Twilight like when u get rlly talkative like ur having a one-sided convo w/them all the time, and they constantly are looking at you poinetedly to hear u narrate whatever ur doing or give a response whenever they same something at you (Rulie/Four/Twi/ and sometimes Time, (and he turns away but Legend too) give a little smile whenever you ramble)

Wild is Very Interested in your langauage, bc the Zora, Rito, Gerudo, and Gorons all had their native tongue that he ended up learning, and so he constantly makes notes to try and decipher some of what ur saying in English

he lights up anytime ur able to successfully tell him another something abt it, like the alphabet, or grammar or structure etc

they seem to pay attention esp in the mornings or late at night? ur not sure why until Wind both draw pictures and tries to get the general idea to you to explain

(”かくいんゃすいちりりきちんるんらなすちそそいみかにとくらかちみしんらなすひらにそいにとしいいせるかくいんゃすいていちのる”)

smth abt ur voice being nice? deep? but theirs do that too? u dont get it, but thank him anyway

they also help u out at markets, keep out of trouble w/locals, and other misc tasks that need some language help

everythings going great, the Chain trusts you, ur getting better at their language every day, and bc English is one of the hardest languages to learn in the world, theyre slowly getting some of urs!

it isnt until ur camping out in the Temple of Time when things get weird again

Not only is there English carved into the walls, which u read as the Chain give u “explain now” looks and u communicate that the rlly ancient looking script they may or may not be able to read is, in fact, the written version of ur language-

but then another portal opens, and there’s sentences wrapped around the edges, which are fully in English too.

☆

* = hint: JIS

So i love ciphers for language barrier AUs, so have a cypher! have fun decoding it if u like, but don’t worry abt translating it, as its purposefully not important for u to enjoy this :)

JFC IM SO SORRY AB THE LENGTH I WROTE THIS FROM MIDNIGHT TO LIKE 1:30 AM- UGH sometimes this happens when i get on a scenario kick, SORRY 😭😭

also so sorry abt late reply! at least i already established im slow w/u guys so ig its not a huge surprise 😭

tysm for the request it was such a fun idea to write abt :D

i also like genshin, just a little bit u could say, so it was cool to see this carryover across fandoms lol

language barrier is so versatile, could be angst, crack, etc. so that makes sense

have a great weekend!!

Peace out,

🌙

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sidsinning · 1 year

Text

UNNECESSARY AND UNHINGED RANT ABOUT CINDERELLA'S CHARACTER FROM CINDERELLA (2015) INCOMING

Lemme talk about Cinderella from Cinderella (2015) for a bit actually yeah because these changes to my girl completely baffle me

She has friends now

Goes outside on her own

Says the only reason why she's staying is because it's her parent's house- bruh.

All of this takes away (+ more reasons down the cut) from the true cruelty of OG!Cinderella's backstory and how it all connects so well to inform you of her character and the actions she takes

OG!Cinderella has been indoctrinated into accepting her life as a maid to her step family since she was a small child. She is never seen going outside of the house besides the night at the ball. The only friends she had were random animals around her she couldn't even fully converse with. She had no other human perspective on her situation or how to get out of it. It makes sense why she's just taking her stepmother's tyranny while holding everything in because this isolation and neglect is all she knows. This is the entire limited scope of her world. A sad reality to many cases of abuse in real life.

And they just. Erased all of this for some. Reason???

The night at the ball was a big deal because she literally NEVER gets to go out. This is the only time she interacts with the outside world aside from the ending. The impact of that was HUGE in the original movie. The new one just cheapened that imo by implying she goes out in town and talks to others regularly. This event was an impossible, fantastical dream come true to someone who is never treated as anything but a servant to everyone she knows.

Basically OG!Cinderella has it way worse which is what makes the ball such a huge deal in the first place.

Third point I don't think I need to explain how Cinderella staying in her abusive home bc the house is "hers to love now that her parents are dead" is not a good character change and doesn't make sense. I would understand if her dad was alive and insisting on staying, but he is GONE. It is a building you grew up in sure, but that's all it is. Not something you sacrifice your wellbeing for. So that's a shit reason they didn't need to make up to say why this character is stuck in her abusive household. The isolation and years of gaslighting were enough. (Also showing how much of a frightening presence and manipulative villain Lady Tremaine is.)

And she sure left it quick after getting hitched lol

The Fairy Godmother having the audacity to test Cinderella with that "oh I'm a poor old woman and I want some milk please" nonsense

Not very godmotherly of her in this version. 🥴 The Fairy Godmother appeared in the original to offer pure comfort to Cinderella in a time of desperate need, when this resilient and kind spirit finally reached her breaking point. The dress, slippers, pumpkin carriage, and magic were all given freely as a present to make her feel better at least for one night.

Meanwhile this goofy ass Godmother has the audacity to be like "hey is she gonna be nice or not even though she's crying in tattered, recently destroyed clothing- I need to see that or else she doesn't get the magic juice". Like why did this become a way to test her morality all of a sudden? Why did you need something from her to give up the magic goods?? It's not even a good test she just walked a couple steps and poured some milk in a bowl,,,

Idk man they made their relationship transactional for no reason which taints the original purpose of this scene imo. The original Fairy Godmother already KNEW Cinderella was kind without having to make sure by disguising herself as a rancid old lady. 😭 Weird and unnecessary addition.

Kinda nitpicky here but this film did not at all match the terror of the torn dress scene which really shows you how horrifying and humiliating it was to Cinderella

Comparison

AND THE BIGGEST OFFENDER: THE WAY SHE "ESCAPED".

I NEED TO TAKE A BREATH

BECAUSE LIKE. WHAT WAS THAT.

Original Cinderella, seeing a real chance of escape from her abuse, uses everything in her possession to do so. She's yelling for the mice to get the key, to get Bruno to chase away the cat, running down to meet the prince's attendants to make sure they get the proof of her identity from her- and that moment she oh-so-casually pulled out the second slipper??? SEEING HER STEPMOTHER'S SLACKED JAW??? GAGGED US ALL.

ICONIC

But 2015. Bitch. What is going on. She gets locked up and easily accepts her doom. She just twirls and sings in her prison like a dunce because cINDerELLa wAs aLReADy cONTenT wIth her sMaLL mOMEnts oF hAPPIneSs anD dREamS wItH thE pRinCE.

Just. Gives up.

Not the mice begging her to get up and save herself come on now

The mice have to do their best on their own to push open her window so the prince and his crew hear her on time.

And yeah, all she had to do was open a window.

WHAT. WHY. HOW. WAS THIS??? MORE EMPOWERING???

1950: use your brain to fight to the very end

2015: quit while you're still ahead, or don't try you just gotta dance and sing all pretty then someone will come along and save you

I'm sorry, but for a production that was so critical of the notion of "Cinderella just waited around for a prince to save her"...is that not literally what they changed the ending to?

You wanna talk about lack of agency in princess stories well here you go 😭

You know what's sad about all this in the end is this is still the best recent live action Disney remake imo LOL

Anyways hello if you've made it all the way down here I rest my case

#disney #cinderella #cinderella 2015 #sidrabbles #rant #i like 1950s lady tremain more but i dont dislike this more sympathetic and character driven take on her either #feels different but not bad #prince is 10000x better no complaints from me #but the bar wasn't that high in the first place so congrats i guess??? LOL RLLY THO THE ACTOR KILLED IT ROB STARK YOU GO GIRL

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darylsfavoritegirl · 3 months

Text

HEYYYY IM HONESTLY SO FUCKING EXCITED WHAT DO YOU THINK ABT THESE HEADCANONS bc i wanted to do smth like for a while i just never could come up with anything but its easy in a sense sooo here you gooou

SFW

• I don't think his mommy issues are necessarily sexual, sometimes you would do something that would invoke that "motherly" "safe" or "warm" feeling inside of him. He would never be able to understand what it was or would tell anyone about it. It'd be one of the reasons why he'd care for you as much as he did. You'd make him feel safe by saying something or embracing your arms around him in a certain way which would make him commemorate his mother, though because his mom died when he was young, he wouldn't be able to understand it at all bc he doesn't consciously remember those moments with her. This man fr would think you'd cast a spell on him :D

• I just know this man is a feminist in the core. Growing up, he'd always hear Merle running his mouth about women and how they were like this and they were like that, overall his ignorant, blunt, dumb thoughts about women. He would witness his dad going off on benders with different women each time and how he'd vulgarly talk about them later. And hell maybe he's disrespected women or been really cruel to them but he still regrets it to this time and yeah we all know this man suffers in redemption, always trying to make up for his past mistakes and wrongs. Yet I'm %100 sure he loves seeing women thrive, turning into their best selves or just witness them be real badass and it might even give him some kind of arousal 👀👀. He is into that shit. I said what I said.

• One of his love languages is definitely showing you the places he'd used to spend his time in. Could be a special spot in the woods, could be a small cabin he'd used to get lit with people. Hell it could be random corner in town whenever you'd have to be in downtown for various reasons. He wouldn't even mind if those places brought him bad memories or unpleasant ones. He'd just like being there with you, doing whole ass story times and watch you react them with a wide-eyed expression. He did have a weird and a "crazy" life before the fall that'd make him feel like he was on mushrooms everytime just thinking about it. He'd love letting you know more and more about his past. It would just give him a reassuring feeling deep down. He would feel like it would bound you two together.

• That.man.has.a.sweet.tooth. He loves anything that has sugar. He'd always snack on candies or cookies or chocolates after a hangover. Or when he'd be on drugs. Sugar wakes him the fuck up and he loves the energy boost. He'd carry some candies in his pocket back in the day, eating them throughout the day when he'd feel his blood sugar dropping.

• He is definitely a car-date type of guy. He got more into it after the apocalpyse started and he met you. Sometimes you'd go on runs and you could sit in the car for hours, smoking, eating, talking or yk👀👀 if supplies you found weren't an emergency need. He absolutely savored those moments. You could sit for hours without speaking, in a complete silence. He appreciates quietude.

NSFW

• I know him having a breeding kink is well known and acknowledged but he's insane about it that it hurts. He loves seeing you all squirmed and whiny underneath him with all his cum inside of you, some of it dripping down your thighs. You couldn't always find the right pills for unplanned pregnancy risk and it WOULD drive him crazy to not be able to it.

• He just loves to see you messy beneath him. Hair all tangled, thighs shaking uncontrollably. Your fingers digging so deep on his shoulders that you'd cause his broad shoulders to bleed sometimes, he loved it. Your eyes are all glossy with pleasure. You both would love to go wild and leave sloppy kisses on eachother's bodies and wouldn't mind them drying on your bodies at all, leaving it all sticky.

• He loves being submissive as much as he loves being dominant. You can't convince me otherwise. If you gained his trust, he will be all yours, all needy beneath you while you ride his soul out of his damn body. Again, he adores a badass woman, a woman to take the lead. You would place your hands on his chest and sometimes hold his strong large biceps and he wouldn't dare to move an inch. He liked being vulnerable like that.

• He is just so patient it physically throws you over the edge. He'd get so close making you cum and he'd stop, teasing you with his tip or fingers or sometimes his tongue. He'd smirk at you and even make fun of you in a taunting way to overstimulate you and don't worry he'd make up for it with better ways. He knows what he is doing. It's just come natural to him.

• It's safe to say you are the one who teases him in the public most of the time, your feet tracing his legs up until it stops on his bulge under the table and he'd give a stern stare, trying to shrug and look indifferent as others would notice his suddenly-changing demenour. However, there'd be boring Alexandria dinners that Deanna would host and if you sat next to eachother, he'd place his large hand on your thigh and even dare to slip a finger on the fabric of your panties, starting to rub his middle finger harshly in circles while having full ass conversations with people and try to hide his subtle smirk bearing his face. He would do it rarely yet he'd be so good at it because no one would suspect a thing, he'd always make it look like he was resting his arm on your lap. You'd squirm under his warm touch and heat waves would wash all over you while trying to look normal as ever. And believe me, after those nights, when you'd confront about him about what he did at a dinner with 20 people, he'd act as if he doesn't understand a thing you're saying or would say "Don' kno' what yer talkin' 'bout." while shrugging his shoulders and turning to his side with a wicked grin.

FOOTNOTE

well this actually took shorter than i thought idk why i believed it would take me couple of days to finish one lmao i deadass wrote this in like an hour max ???? anyway i wish there were more but idc i was so impatient to post one of theseeee :)))

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h0nkch0c0late · 7 months

Note

Omggggg Sam is the cutest thing ever!!! Could I request a cute little imagine of reader basically pampering Sam. Like doing his hair, some face masks and any night time routine 🤗🤗

Girl I have never done any of that stuff in my life so I'm gonna alter it a bit if that's okay :]

Pampered

Sam Riordan x Reader

SUMMARY: Sometimes your boyfriend just needs a little pampering. Too bad you don't know how the fuck to do it.

WARNINGS: none except for swearing, and mentions of vomit...don't ask.

---------------------------------------------------------

"Why don't we ever do shit like the cute couples in the movies?" Sam asks, the two of you cuddled up on your bed inside of your dorm, laptop open to some random rom com.

"Like pampering? Skin care routine shit? Hair shit?" You question, one hand playing with Sam's hair as the other lay lazily against his lap.

His head was laying on your shoulder, arms wrapped around your torso as he looked up at you with his puppy dog eyes, "Yeah. Why don't we?"

You quirk and eyebrow at him as you chuckle, "1. Because we aren't like the cute couples in the movies, and 2. I don't know how the fuck to pamper myself, let alone anyone else, and I barely have a skin care routine. I slap a bit of Nivea face cream on, and that's about it."

He shrugs, "true. I also don't trust you with any sort of product near my face. You might accidentally kill me with it."

"Not to mention we are the total opposite of a cute couple." You add with a smirk.

Sam scoffed, "oh, yeah. We're absolutely sickening."

"And not like the good kind of sickening either." You snicker.

He nods against your shoulder, "Yeah. It's more like the most vile, vomit-all-over-your-shoes inducing, weird kind of sickening." He explains in a feigned serious tone.

You begin to laugh at the stupidity of your conversation, Sam joining in and suddenly you both landed in a laughing fit.

Sam had landed on the floor, holding his stomach as he laughed, and somehow you had ended up beside him in the same position, both of you unable to breath from how much you had been laughing.

After a while, the two of you managed to calm down, laying on the floor beside each other in comfortable silence, the laptop still playing the rom com in the background.

As the two stared at the ceiling, pretending to make shapes with the bland pattern.

"...the least I could do is slather some slimy ass face cream on you." You say after a while.

"That sounds fucking amazing." He replied, the two of you turning your heads to look at each other, large grins plastered on both of your faces.

You chuckled as you flung yourself back onto your feet, helping Sam up and grabbing your face cream.

It wasn't the pampering that Sam had seen in the movies, but it was the second best thing.

No-scratch that- it was the first best thing, because his girlfriend was willing to do such a small action for him, but to him it meant so much.

After all, they weren't the world's most...conventional couple.

----------------------------------------------------------

I know it's not exactly what you asked for, Anon, but I felt that this way was more fitting for his character :))) and also bc I didn't feel like bullshitting my way through the fic LMAO.

#x reader #imagine #sam riordan #sam riordan x reader #gen v fanfiction #gen v #genV x reader

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artsycrapfromsai · 7 months

Text

Random details on Amaryllis as my Tav and my BG3 playthrough with her:

🌸 she's romancing Astarion, and has no idea. She just thinks he's neat. He thinks she's an insane, weird, bleeding heart, yet somehow that's getting to him. (It was the embroidered art of him). I imagine he falls for her first, and he has no idea what to do about it bc none of his experience works for her. That said, she's going to eventually return his feelings and be a lot more awkward/shy when she does

🌸 she and Gale are nerd buddies who talk for hours and hours about nerdy magical shit, or history stuff, or gods and goddesses, whatever can be found in a book. Probably end up discussing how to send a bear flying at mach speed with stackings of haste and other magical items

🌸 Amy likes Shadowheart and wants to braid Shadowheart's favorite flowers into her hair and have a like a spa day together

🌸 Karlach and Lae'zel both, ah, very bluntly propositioned her and spooked Amy senseless (this is what happens when you have a demi-sexual n demi-romantic OC who gets aggressively flirted with)

🌸 Amy has decided to run, hide, and avoid them for a while bc of this. I imagine when Karlach specifically propositioned Amy at her bedroll, Amy was so startled she immediately started rolling away and right over the campfire, completely ignoring the fact that she was now on fire. (She just misty stepped away from Lae'zel)

🌸 (i imagine Amy ran to Astarion after this, wide eyed and frazzled and going "HELP" lol and after, they hung out in the woods doing embroidery to relax, while Astarion mused on how it's probably a good thing she didn't realize he tried propositioning her too, or else she might have been scared away. Also him musing on how she enjoys spending time with him enough that she'd rather just embroider stuff with him than have casual sex with people)

🌸 Despite that, she does genuinely like Lae'zel and Karlach a lot, and enjoys sparring with both, and making cute plushies with Karlach

🌸 Amy thinks Wyll is kinda silly and goofy, but earnest. She thinks his horns are funny and wants to make decorations for them

🌸 Halsin deeply reminds her of one of her dads (who, coincidentally, was also an 8ft tall, beefy, middle aged nature loving elf)

Speaking of-

One way I'm viewing the playthrough is that Amaryllis from her main campaign got bonked on the head into a coma and got isekai'd, with amnesia, into the game story

A lot of the characters are hilariously very similar to characters she knew in her OG campaign

I think those initial similarities are what drew Amy to everyone, and they're why she was so immediately comfortable around people that she should have probably been more wary of (Astarion), but as time passes that all fades as she gets to know everyone more personally

#bg3 tav #bg3 #amaryllis #text post

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hoejosatoru · 11 months

Text

Got Game? Haikyu edition !

Ranking Hiakyu characters on how good they are at hitting on people. Basically does your fave has rizz or nah?

A/n: there are sooo many haikyu characters so if I forgot your fave I'm sorry feel free to add them in wherever you want & if you disagree be nice about it or I'll bite you this took a long time there’s SO MANY OF THEM

33. Mad Dog

He’s scaring hoes. No explanation needed.

32. Aone

He was dead last until I remembered mad dog existed. He is scaring hoes as well. But like if someone could give him a chance I think he does have a good heart. He really needs to be introduced to someone or something, bc cold walking up to someone is never going to work for him I fear.

31. Ushijima

More intimidating that scary, but still makes people nervous. He’s just like super dry and has bad social skills. Does not know how to be flirty at all. He’s cute so I think on occasion there’s girls that want him enough to look past all that but honestly he will almost always strike out unless he has a wingman (Tendo) to help balance him out.

30. Sakusa

Bro is mean and grumpy. I also feel like he doesn’t really care for random hook ups anyway so he is not trying to pick up people a lot. On the occasion he does see someone he wants to approach, I just struggle to see him being flirty. Like you almost get the sense he is judging you when he’s talking to you. Which, to be fair, he probably is. He is another person who would benefit from having a wingman, though he won’t admit it. He’s getting past Ushijima by the skin of his teeth just because he isn’t as imposing.

29. Kita

Another one who I don’t see trying to approach too many people. I think he would come off as disinterested even if he did find you cute. Would probably try to flirt by asking weird philosophical questions. Does better than Sakusa bc his energy is slightly less intense.

28. Yamaguchi

He’s just too awkward. He gets super shy and flustered around anyone he thinks is cute. Sometimes gets lucky when he goes for someone who finds his shyness cute, but often is shit outta luck.

27. Tsukishima

Of course Tsukki and Yams are next to each other. Tsukki is another grumpy one, but not as intense as Sakusa. He too doesn’t approach too many people, but more than Kita or Sakusa would. I could totally see him being one of those dudes that relies on being tall for getting girls. Like he thinks he doesn’t have to try that hard since he is over 6 foot💀 I think he flirts by being mean but it comes off too mean or condescending at times. Definitely tries to be more selective with who he approaches though, won’t approach anyone he doesn’t think he has a good chance with.

26. Goshiki

Talks a big game in front of his friends, but gets really nervous in front of the person. Blushes like crazy and trips over his words. Can get past that at times, but flirting definitely doesn’t come as naturally to him.

25. Tendo

Tendo is fearless, which does help his success rate because he just will walk up to anyone he thinks is hot. Doesn't really get nervous at all. However, he is a little weird (I say that affectionately) so he's definitely not everyone’s cup of tea. Strikes out a decent amount bc of that, but honestly it doesn't really bother him at all. Will just move on to next one. He’s really just there for a good time.

24. Yamamoto

Gets very nervous around girls he thinks are hot. He gets loud when he is nervous which can freak people out. Tries his best, but either comes on really strong or really stiff. Sometimes can get past that if gets hyped up by his friends beforehand.

23. Kunimi

He’s okay at it. He’s quiet and a little snarky, which doesn’t alway connect well. I think if he is able to break the ice and get a conversation going, he has a good success rate. But if he isn’t able to get the person hooked into the conversation quickly, he fizzles out.

22. Asahi

He is like 50/50. He’s the guy who comes up to you and you get super excited because he’s cute, but he can fumble it. If he is in a nervous mood, it is really hard for him to get a convo going and be natural. Those days he is striking out more. If he is feeling confident that day, he has a really good success rate. Again, 50/50.

21. Oikawa

I know this is low but hear me out. Because girls were crazy over him in high school he really never had to try to get someone to like him. Therefore he really doesn’t have good skills in that area, especially when just approaching someone random. I think he would learn fairly quickly, but it would be a tough start.

20. Kenma

He’s kinda shy and doesn’t like approaching people bc he’s a lil lazy( but mostly nervous). However, he’s super smart and if he can figure out a way to get you to approach him, he’ll definitely do that. Can have trouble standing out to people since he is on the quieter side. But circling back to the smart thing, I think he is good at zeroing in on his type & what will get that person hooked on him. Definitely spends some time observing you before he makes a move. His success rate does go up a lot if he has a wingman, but he doesn’t NEED one like some people on this list.

19. Tanaka

He’s very similar to Yamamoto, but I think he is just a bit better at staying calm. Just a bit. Definitely is nervous to start& can come off a little strong at first, but if you give him a chance he’s able to show he’s a good, genuine guy. Also feel like if he is with a friend his success rate goes up like crazy. Like he doesn't need the wing man to intervene for him, it’s more like having his friend there makes him feel confident and takes away his nerves. This is why he is always begging Nishinoya to come out with him.

18. Matsukawa

Middle of the road guy. I feel like he is bad at opening conversation, which hurts him. However, if someone gives him a chance for a longer conversation he does a lot better.

17. Daichi

He’s not bad, but he’s also not amazing? Like I don’t really see him as someone who gets very nervous around people he finds cute. However, he’s not super flirty and can struggle to hold people’s interest if that makes sense? Just kinda mid tbh.

16. Koganegawa

He has like puppy dog vibes. He has a lot of fun flirting. I feel like he is a lil bit of an air head, so he doesn’t even realize he should be nervous. But since he has such positive, easy going vibes it’s super easy to talk to him. His down fall is that he can be a little too spacey and forget to follow through, ex forgets to ask for your number or tell you he thinks you’re cute.

15. Kageyama

He’s not super flirty either. But I feel like as he gets older he grows in confidence and gets better at approaching people. Let’s be honest them beautiful fucking blue eyes has him picking up most people he wants. His weakness is sometimes he’s too reserved and the other person thinks he’s not interested. Either than that a pretty solid success rate

14. Akaashi

Honestly bro is so fine he really doesn’t have to try that hard. Similar to kageyama in that he can struggle with coming off too aloof. Still, I think he’s super polite and engaging which makes him charming without even really trying

13. Lev

He also has some puppy dog vibes but I think he is more in control of it. Especially as he gets older he mellows out more. Being a professional model gave him a lot of confidence, but he still is a lil goofy on the inside, so it never comes off as cocky or anything. I could see him trying a little too hard to be suave at times that it works against him. Like it comes off a little disingenuous. But he’s a 6′4 model, he’s not struggling THAT hard to get numbers lets be real.

12. Nishinoya

He’s higher than Tanaka bc I think he comes off slightly less strong. Maybe it’s just because he’s small 💀. But he doesn’t feel intimidating even though he does come on strong. He’s able to do it in a way that’s very endearing. Also once he gets talking he’s able to reel himself in more. He’s also super funny which helps his success rate a TON.

11. Kuroo

Idk why but I can see him wanting to use like pick up lines 💀 like he thinks he’s being smoother than he really is. Kenma tells him he’s being a dork(which he is). He’s hot enough that most people will give him a chance, though. Once he gets past that he genuinely charming and doesn’t struggle to get someone’s number

10. Bokuto

Another one that can come on strong but in a way that works for him. I can deadass see him just walking up to someone and flat out telling them they’re gorgeous. And it feels so genuine(bc it is genuine) and not just like someone trying to get in your pants (even if he is trying to get in your pants). If he strikes out tho it totally kills his mood and it’s hard for him to recover.

9. Atsumu

He’s the opposite of bokuto where him calling you gorgeous sounds like he’s just trying to get in your pants 💀 but he is SUCH flirt oml. I think that can hurt him at times bc he’s laying it on a little too thick. But usually finds a good balance. Can charm the pants off most people if you give him enough time.

8. Aran

Solid flirter. Confident enough to approach you and make conversation without being overbearing. Chill and easy to talk to. Even if you don’t end up going out with him after, you still enjoy the talk you had. Also doesn’t make it weird if you decline him.

7. Sugawara

Suga is so good at getting your guard down. He’s just sweet and genuine you feel at ease with him (it’s those big brown cow eyes). So easy to talk to and is surprisingly funny. Plus when he tells you he works with kids it makes him seem even sweeter.

6. Terushima

And then we have to total opposite. Honestly he should be lower. He comes off strong to the point of being cocky but somehow makes it work. Let’s be honest it’s the tongue ring(he definitely makes suggestive jokes about it). I also hc that he’s super tatted as an adult. I think he does well because he’s superrrrr good at picking out the girls who would be into his vibe. Also like who doesn’t wanna hook up with a bad boy every now and then?

5. Hinata

Listen. This may be high but I truly believe Hinata has good game. So good that at times he doesn’t even realize the effect he is having. I think his favorite way to flirt is getting you to do something competitive with him. Has no issue walking up to you at the beach to ask if you wanna play volleyball with him or even just asking to play beer pong at a party. He doesn’t even really have to try once you agree because he is super good at everything he does (which is a turn on) and you have a lot of fun. Great at asking you on a date without even realizing you’re being asked. Like he’ll say you should go get something to eat after playing together and you immediately agree. Then you’re like wait a second... this is totally date. And you’re very happy about it.

4. Semi

I feel like we don’t know that much about his cannon personality, but he has such a cool vibe. Liken effortlessly cool so you’re naturally drawn to him. Plus he’s super good looking like come on. Really just knows how to curate his look. He’s someone expect to be a little mean but he’s actually a sweetheart. Has you head over heels in no time.

3. Osamu

Atsumu is punching the air rn. He’s got Atsumu’s confidence but is able to keep from being too much. Subtle flirt, but super good at it nonetheless. Loves flirting with costumers who come to his shop because it gets him extra tips but also you keep coming back to order shit just so you can talk to him more. He knows he’s got you right where he wants you. He gets soooo many numbers left on receipts and absolutely will call them if he liked you.

2. Suna

God. This man. He was born to flirt look at him!! He’s so fucking smooth. He’s sorta aloof but he is really able to work that to his favor. Definitely confident enough to just walk up to you and start a convo. He is a good talker but he almost doesn't need words??? Like he can just look at you a certain way and god you’re sweating (in the best way). Easily gets anyone he sets his sights on.

1. Iwaizumi

Iwaizumi has the best game idc. He’s equally hot and approachable. Has plenty of confidence but is never cocky. Truly has a kind, warm aura that makes you feel so comfy talking to him. He’s super smart and funny. Like you just feel like you’re having a conversation you don’t even realize he’s flirting with you but you’re absolutely developing a huge crush on him. The type you talk to and immediately feel like you’ve known him forever. He truly never strikes out. It’s a gift.

Bonus: Coach Ukai

It didn’t feel fair to compare Ukai to everyone bc he is a few years older and definitely more experienced but I couldn't leave him out. He has INSANE game. Like just look at him. He’s fine, a lil bit of a bad boy vibe, has a heart of gold (LOVES dropping in that he is a volunteer coach with kids). I think he would be sexy n fun flirt like it’s just too easy for him.

#why are there so many #haikyuu #haikyu #haikyu x reader #haikyu headcanons #haikyu scenarios #haikyu hcs #oikawa hcs #kuroo hcs #kenma hcs #bokuto hcs #hinata headcanons #kageyama hcs #atsumu headcanons #osamu headcanons #suna headcanons #iwaizumi headcanons

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