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#pretty little mushroom guy
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Day seven hundred fifty five 755 Morelull
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maaaxx · 1 month
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Just walked almost 3 miles to get water because apparently my college has never heard of putting it in the vending machines 😌
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persephoneflouwers · 10 months
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painting a mackerel today :]
#taking a break from digital art for a bit bc my computer is fucked up#so im getting around to finally painting a bunch of little ceramic things ive got laying around#ive got...m tiny glow in the dark ghost..... fish that i am going 2 make into a mackerel.... mushrooms in a lil terrarium#:]#going 2 make mackerel part of my brand more. theyre so pretty#i finally got to the zora in the totk playthru im watching and i looove them so much#i want 2 draw a mackerel zora#u know how. youtubers will sometimes draw themselves/have people draw them as characters in the game theyre playing for thumbnails#randomly got like. the impulse to dothat for myself earlier#god. would love 2 make youtube videos someday. when i havemy own space again and money to afford a non-laptop computer#i wanna be a mackerel zora!!!!!!!!!!!!#i think i wanna make myself a little logo sometime#like.... if i actually am serious abt making sellable art one day (which i would LOVE to do btw)#i wanna.... have a little ghost/mackerel combination logo#like a fish whos body turns to bones halfway down or something. idk. im not super good at concepts like that but i wanna try#im not a graphic design person but... man.. would love 2 have a little guy#idk its ramble time today#having a lot of feelings abt art. pride made me feel things abt being sn artist#i wanna make stuff like that. i wanna be able to sell things like that.#have a little booth i can decorate with moss and mushrooms and fish and ghosts and things. make it Mine.#and make stuff that ppl think is cool. man. idk#head in hands. i have so much work to do
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dirt-str1der · 1 year
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After i made kiryu walk all around kamurocho to find a quiet alley hidden from the streets thats not already taken up by bacchus i found this little bend in theatre square :) street to the left and sweet privacy (kind of) right ahead
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monsterbroth · 2 years
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wish I could have a mushroom understand how much I appreciate
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arolesbianism · 3 months
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Management games my beloved I <3 tormenting lil guys for my benefit
#rat rambles#I decided to give lob corp a try recently since my siblings have been playing it and Ive been having fun#but I also keep getting distracted thinking abt how oni characters would manage here#I have been deliberately not reading the story stuff since quite frankly Im not in the market for new blrobos rn#but I know bits and pieces from my siblings being obessed with the project moon universe and cast#I do like hod and the girl twin from what I do know abt them they do feel a bit like me bait#Ill probably go through the dialogue at some point in the future but probably not anytime soon#Im not making that mistake again after I slipped into the oni rabbit hole from One lore log Im not testing fate again#but hey on the bright side I get to get attached to my lovely lil employees as I repeatedly send them to their deaths#hey my strongest guy became the strongest by being my test dummy to rly I did him a favor#well the downside is that hes the only one I trust with my two waw abnos but realistically others could handle it too#hes not my only level five employee he just got there first and is my reliable lil boy#well I do have a teeny bit of a problem with the fact that I also have a mushroom thing that Im pretty sure is also a waw#I messed around with it a lil bit in a day I ended up resetting for unrelated reasons and from what little I gathered it seems like it#could be real annoying especially if by 'three non insight works in a row are done' it means for everything and not just itself#it seems to have a similar effect to a different abno I have that's a tree that tries to eat ppl but probably a bit worse#the reason I reset that day was because little red broke out while I was also messing around with a scarecrow guy#and I kinda just let things play out for a bit for funsies and when I looked back at the mushroom there was an enemy outside#so Im guessing it lures in ppl like the tree and then tranforms them into enemies#the tree seemingly in theory has benefits to letting ppl get eated according to the guidelines but Im gonna take a shot in the dark and#guess the mushroom is not going to provide fun benefits#I mean in theory if I just work with it only once in a while it should be fine but Im gonna leave it until I finish my abno backlog#Im finally almost done with the stupid scarecrow that bastard caused way more problems for me than it should have#my guys can easily take it when it breaches but the problem is little red#honestly little red is a quite the problem for me in general because of their counter lowering when another abno breaches#this is mostly a problem because I still have to do quests around supressing abnos#and lemme tell you my guys cannot take little red at all#I also have had king of greed breach but at least with her you can easily play the stalling game#maybe I should find out how the bounty deal works and if I could utilize that for the mission#oh yeah I also have the fire girl since I missclicked which is disappointing because shes low level and boring boooo
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nezuscribe · 1 year
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it’s a solid fact, carved into stone, that toji treats his pretty girl, you, so fucking good. like unbelievably good. so good that every past man in your life is a dim comparison to him. 
did any of the other guys buy you chanel handbags, or that vivienne westwood necklace you’ve been eyeing for so long, wrapped all and pretty as they sat idly on your bed? no.
toji wants you to be his one and only, he’s sure of it, so everything he does for you is solely out of the goodness of his heart. and forget about saying that he’s a little bit curious about how your tight pussy would feel as it wrapped around him. 
well, actually, he is a little bit curious but he doesn't have to wait long (thank god, because he is not a patient man), before you’re spread out all nice and pretty for him, that pink lingerie he bought for you hugging your body in the most delicious way possible as his fat mushroom tip nudges at your puffy folds. 
and toji wouldn’t wait, no matter how much he tried, before he bullied his fat dick into your pussy, groaning out loud in the most sinful way possible at the way you clench around him. 
you can’t complain because he’s so pretty as he fucks you rough and deep, a ring of your essence surrounding at the base of his dick as he pounds into you ruthlessly, smothering you in compliments as his thumb swiped at your sweet little bundle of nerves.
“shit, baby you’re so gorgeous right now, wish you could see yourself,” he grunted, his hands steadying themselves on your knees as he quickened his movements, “be a good girl for me, open that pretty little mouth and tell me how much you love me.” 
and he watches in pure delight as your glossed up lips open, your eyes never leaving his as you give him a tiny smile, pulling him closer to your face as you mutter against his lips, 
“love you so much, t-toji, never loved anybody else like you.” 
poor thing just cums right there, his hot seed painting your insides white as his head falls into your chest, biting at your breasts as he moans at the felling of you spasming around him. 
“felt amazing sweetheart,” he nips at your soft skin, rising back up as his dark hair falls onto his face, the scar around his lip twitching upwards as he gives you a gleeful grin, “y’up for another round?” 
and how could you do anything else but helplessly nod for him to continue?
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wakebymoonsleepbysun · 3 months
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Dogday!! Trying to figure out a way to send a Y/N in there to help him.
Rambles under the cut.
(I drew my sona in these cuz self-indulgent, but if I ever write anything it'll be a reader insert with little to no canon design.)
Design notes: Took some elements from his game model as well as his cartoon design. I think when we see him, he is emaciated and/or stretched out, the way CatNap is said to be able to stretch. Don't know if that's an ability all Smiling Critters have though. For now I'm saying it is SOMEWHAT but CatNap is the better at it by MILES. In any case, that's why he's not quite as lanky as he is in game, and is also a bit shorter.
I also he can be bipedal or quadrupedal, much like CatNap seems to be able to switch back and forth. A bit more animalistic than his cartoon counterpart, but part of that is just him not wanting to tower over the children and employees all the time, so drops down to all fours quite a bit.
The fur texture on his ears in the game cave him a floofy cocker spaniel look so I went with that instead of the less floofy ears he has in the cartoon and his original plushie.
The white pupils being absent when we see him I believe is a sign of how weak he is. When healthy, all the Bigger Bodies Smiling Critters have them, much like CatNap does.
Trying to actually keep his huge open-mouth smile at all times, unlike with my FNAF stuff where I give them more of an ability to emote. That said trying to get him to look angry or sad was a challenge. Sad I think worked okay but the one where I meant him to look angry he looks more cocky or smirky than mad. Tender moments are a bit harder too, as keeping that huge grin with more tender eyes results in him looking either drunk or horney or just like he's not taking the moment very seriously, haha.
And the story? Not sure yet, bouncing around a few ideas, though I don't think I'll have the reader and the player be the same person. Reader might be someone who came up in PlayCare alongside Dogday. Perhaps they knew each other as kids when Dogday was still human. Haven't decided how much of this Dogday remembers or at what point the reader realizes Dogday is their old friend who got "adopted".
Reader grows up the Playcare and is given a job once they're an adult. (Something something starting the brainwashing and normalization of bullshit early to make employees who are more willing to look the other way?)
Dogday somehow kept them hidden during the Hour of Joy and the reader's been living in the caves ever since. (The caves open up so much possibility for people being hidden in the factory. Much easier to say there's an unknown offshoot of a natural cave system than an unknown part of the factory.)
How are they staying fed? Uhhhh...cave mushrooms? Trips to the surface? Moss? Stale vending machine candy? I don't know yet.
Not sure how to pull a happy ending out of this horror but I'm trying. Maybe the reader convinces Dogday to leave after Ch 3 because he'd be too weak to help anyway or something? And uh...I'm just gonna pretend since he's kinda a plushie he can be sewn back together even though I'm PRETTY SURE canonically the inclusion of blood and guts makes that...not a thing.
Just remember guys...all winds blow away...eventually.
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simplyreveries · 4 months
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when theyre pining; vice dorm leaders!
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trey clover
trey always had an eye on you ever since he met you, as the "magicless person from another world" he was pretty intrigued by you. he only grew closer to you from there. with his personality i feel like its easy to take his intentions more as a friend more than someone who's interested in you. and trey tries his best to get his feelings across that hes fallen quite literally hopeless for you. (will die if you ever hit him with the "oh youre like such a friend/brother to me!")
ace gets so offended when you get all the extras of his treats or that you're the first one to get some of his baked goods. he’ll complain that saying that “that's no fair- you're trey’s favorite!” and trey laughs but doesn’t deny it.
he tries to be as helpful and caring towards you, he does feel some remorse for your situation and all too. if you need help with anything pleaasee go to him because he loves being someone you can rely on.
ok so, trey can flirt... if hes not thinking about it. like if he puts himself into this mindset of "I'm totally going to woo you with these words" he is a fool. we all saw his painful attempts during the ghost marriage event. I'll never forget that he compared the brides' eyes to grapes.... needless to say, he totally messes up around you like that all the time. cater once happened to witness one of these instances and went through the five stages of grief.
ruggie bucchi
ruggie plays off any feelings he has towards you like he's not taking it seriously. he gives off pretty confusing signals during the beginning when he started to develop feelings for you. perhaps its just because of how overwhelmed he feels and doesn't know how to physically handle it. he cannot get you out of his brain no matter how much he tries.
he finds it hard to trust. when someone does something for him he always assumes it's because they're going to want something in return. so when you just help him sometimes when you catch him doing some random tasks for leona and try to help him hes... confused. and truthfully doesn't accept your help for a while, he'll brush it off. but he still remembers that.
judging by your situation and practically being thrown into this world without any of your own belongings, you're in a tight spot with money. sometimes when he does shifts at the mostro lounge and sees you there he starts to try sparking conversations with you. though it's probably him attempting to discreetly make fun of some customer that was being rude to you. ruggie feels all giddy and excited when he makes you laugh.
he gets all playful around you, you know he's around when you hear his mischievous laugh. sometimes he uses "laugh with me" to move you closer to him he'd say "i didnt know you were so excited to see me...!" and laugh. you can only roll your eyes.
jade leech
jade is... interesting when it comes to having feelings. because its pretty intense once you've caught his attention. he's also just so strange when it comes to showing that. as much as he desperately does want to call you his and all, he enjoys the stage where you're unaware of how he feels. he thinks it's like a game to win you over or something and he likes a little challenge.
jades love language is telling you that he saw a nice-looking mushroom during one of his hikes and it reminded him of you. okay seriously though, he'll love to share to you all about his little terrariums, he's quite proud of himself.
he loves it whenever you come by the mostro lounge, trust me he'll be there ready to serve you the moment you're there. he playfully tells you that you're his favorite customer. so, you get extra good meals done specially by jade, he'll ask you what you thought of it. one time he messed with you by telling you he used a random plant he found and wanted to know if it was edible... and was like "hehe...i kid, dont worry".. he thought your reaction was quite amusing.
not going to lie this guy literally just spawns like you could be in the library chatting with grim and turn around and he's there??? he smiles and is like "ah (name) how pleasant to see you here." :))) HUH??
jamil viper
jamil was in complete denial with his feelings for you, he hated himself almost because he feels like he is making the biggest mistake falling in love with someone from a completely different world. he has never felt so intensely about someone until you arrived. to push his feelings away for a while and just yearned for you from a distance.
nevertheless, you being you always try to talk and get closer to him, and he can't resist his feelings growing so much with each conversation (even if it's mostly one sided from your behalf). whenever he sees you at one of kalims parties and celebrations he almost freezes and can only stare at you... until kalim follows his line of vision and gets an excited grin, starting to laugh and its over for jamil. that guy is going to make so many painfully obvious attempts at getting the two of you together.
he gets pretty quiet around you, if you didn't know him well it may seem like he didn't like you but trust me that is absolutely not the case here. since he listens and remembers a lot of what you say, he tries to use that as an opportunity to attempt talking more to you. it's cute to see him try, even if its mundane things like cooking. but if you bring up hobbies, he enjoys like basketball club and dancing he'll become more talkative.
whenever you do small things like acknowledge him?? compliment him?? hes smitten and hates it so much. usually, these things don't really matter to him when he hears it from others but when it comes from you? its very important. you sound so genuine too about it. or even go out of your way to help him with anything since he has a lot on his plate as vice dorm leader.
rook hunt
once he's got his eye on you it's over because you're going to be constantly seeing him everywhere...! he is so incredibly infatuated with you and won't hesitate to tell you that. you've captivated him in every way- he finds your beauty to be irresistible, that he finds it a no-brainer that he's deeply harboring feelings for someone such as yourself.
rook is literally so weird when it comes to you im sorry. but its ROOK. he notices everything about you "is this a new perfume? ah its so lovely!! beauté!!" right after you just awkwardly said "good morning" to him when he was staring at you blissfully.
speaking of staring... wowie he cannot take his eyes off of you. he'll sigh dreamily like RIGHT next to you with his head in his hands thinking how truly captivating you are. and whenever you decide to talk to him, he literally listens to every word you say- but hey, at least no conversation with him is dry or boring with him because this man can talk forever about anything. he'll even tell you more about himself.
he tends to put you on this pedestal. literally, you can do nothing wrong in his eyes. rook will write you poems upon poems, gifting your beautiful things and tells you that they remind him of you, and he just simply had to give them to you.
lilia vanrouge
done here!
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inkskinned · 9 months
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they don't see it, because it is around them like air. to them, it would have to be through movies, through magazines. they think it happens outside of life, like it must be selected to be interacted with.
but you discovered in the fifth grade that you couldn't wear shirts with words on them, it was an excuse for someone to look at your chest. you were catcalled before you were in middle school. sometimes you look at that memory and deny it - surely that can't be right, you were young. but you were in a skirt, so maybe that was a natural byproduct. it was a skirt from that place "justice by limited too" - a store literally for kids. it was popular around then. you wore that skirt twice and then never again.
you can't wear headphones, because what if a man wants to talk to you? there's a guy on the internet who complains that women shut themselves off from being approached. at night, you often keep the headphones positioned but with the sound off, just in case you need to hear something behind you.
you learned at 12 that you can't make eye contact, don't acknowledge the aggression. just walk faster and hope he picks on somebody else. don't wear your hair like that. do not park next to that kind of car, park an entire cityblock away if you must.
you can't go to the museum, you're sitting and tying your shoe when he approaches you and mentions that nobody understands art anymore. that in the whole world, it's just you-two. you have no recourse for eating a meal (it's rabbit food if it's salad, and someone will roll their eyes, eat a sandwich. it's pick-me behavior if it's a burger, we get it you're a cool girl). if you like mushrooms you are cottagecore, which is cheesy. if you like video games you're an egirl (similar to a pick-me). boys do not get categories, but if you point out the categories are sexist, you are told okay but these girls really exist.
it is somehow developing, a little undercurrent that you've been uncomfortable with. the nickname "karen" went from being "a white woman that uses her whiteness as a weapon, particularly against people of color," to now mean "any woman raising her voice or being even a little upset." the reappropriation of a term used specifically to call out white women for their racism has set your skin on edge. now it is just another version of "bitch," one that can be said on television. recently you saw a woman get called a karen because a drunk driver sideswiped her, and she screamed when it happened. the comments on the dashcam video all say "why do women always scream about everything." "when has the world ever been bettered by women screaming." "this fucking karen. she deserved to get hit."
in the sitcom, it's a joke that the wife is furious; slamming her hands down into the sink. i do everything around here, might as well do this too. in your house, your father is always in-his-office. before you know better, your first boyfriend is the type to say it's just easier for you. you used to beg him to take you on dates. he used to make a big deal about it, about the sacrifice of effort, even if you were the one who did most of the planning.
someone on the internet makes a "POV: the most boring person you've ever met" where he puts a towel on his head and just talks like a normal person. his impression of a boring woman is just a woman that is talking about her pretty-average life without exaggeration.
you are sometimes actually sad in the reverse, because actually you did used to struggle to pay attention in conversations. you were also easily bored of normal things, your adhd pinging off of every radio tower in the vacinity. it took time and therapy and patience, and now you delight in the small things about your friends. you like having them show you their organizational systems and talk about their taylor swift tickets. you are entertained by them because you learned to be, even though your brain is structured to only be excited by novelty. you kind of hate the idea that the reason your father will never actually pay attention to you is that you're no longer interesting. eventually the shine wore off, and you were just a person, not a spaceship. he never learned how to just, like, form an actual intimate friendship. it was always at a distance, this sense - emotional closeness was too much. (and yes. he's homophobic).
you're already tired of whatever the fuck is happening with the words "divine feminine", a rancid take that is basically just a rebranding of the patriarchy in action. what the fuck do they mean "being small and delicate and needing protection" is feminine. the words they are looking for are that they want a partner, not that their desire for equivalent support is relegated to gender. the human desire for community is not actually gendered at all. also, what fucking wolves are these "divine masculine" men even battling. fuckken taxes? shouldn't their "desire to protect" also mean "protect you from emotional neglect", or are all emotions off-limits (and how sad would that be. that's a horrible bar to set.)
and they tell you it's really not bad actually, because it's just there. they suggest you get off the internet or you stop reading that book or you stop thinking so hard about the movie or you stop just-being-a-feminist because honestly it's a killjoy sort of thing and then you tilt your head to the side and there's that little siren in the back of your head. if things were actually fine, being a feminist wouldn't put a stop to anything, it would go completely unnoticed, because you wouldn't have any comment to make about any of this
but you are ruining your own life, they tell you. also, girls don't sit like that. also, all girls are catty. also, all girls are bad drivers. also, all girls just need a cute bracelet and an iced coffee.
you do like iced coffee, is the thing. when you close your eyes, the world around you has this strange note to it. and once you hear it, it never stops ringing.
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shankschewtoy · 8 months
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had this random thought and thought I'd request. what if a random kid just comes over and confesses their love for you (a fully grown adult.) and the one piece men are just standing there like 'wtf is this kid on'
a/n - OML 💀💀💀 I’m laughing so hard right now 😭 anon this idea is hilarious how do you guys think of such funny stuff
Warnings ⚠️ - g/n reader, it’s a random kid not kidd himself- just wanted to clarify that bec i thought it was kidd, major crack
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- If it wasn’t already apparent, Luffy has made it quite clear that he loves you VERY much
- let’s say you’ve been on this island for maybe about a month, and you love it there! The weather’s nice and cool, there’s a nice ocean breeze, and the sun is always out but not too strong
- you were sitting down on a bench with nami and robin, waiting for Sanji and Luffy to come back from their shopping spree
- suddenly, a kid appeared in front of you, holding a bouquet of flowers and a little hand made present
- “Um-! You’re super cool and pretty/handsome! And- I love you! Please take this gift and these roses!”
- the shock that just froze the three of you
- robin raised an eyebrow while nami burst out laughing, unable to breathe
- “BAHAHAHAHSUBDIDBD- YOU’RE LIKE 22 AND THIS IS A LITTLE ASS KID-“
- “Nami! Be nice! Um… Thanks kid- I like the flowers. But like Nami said- I’m a lot… Older than you.”
- The kid looked like they were about to start sobbing, so you quickly took the flowers and present to make the kid happy
- the present was a little origami heart and a butterfly, it was actually quite adorable
- All of the sudden, Luffy fucking tackled the poor child, flying across the sidewalk
- “Y/N’S MINEEEEEEEEEE!!”
- bro was hissing and growling like a feral monkey at the poor kid wtf 💀
- Sanji had to rip Luffy off the poor child and this grown man was throwing a fit, yelling at this kid
- “Y/N’S MINE! I LOVE THEM!” -luffy
- “I LOVE THEM TOO!” -kid
- “I LOVE THEM MORE!” -luffy
- “NO I DO!” -kid
- this argument continued for about 20 minutes. 20 minutes
- you had to drag Luffy and I mean DRAGGG him back to the sunny while he kept yelling at the kid about how he loved you more
- “Hmph! I bet i could take him in a fight!” -luffy (please keep in mind that this child is like 6)
- “Yeah ok luffy, don’t beat up a child.”
- “I’m a pirate! I’m already a criminal! HEY KID! GET OVER HERE IMMA BEAT YOUR ASS!” *feral screeching*
- “LUFFY NO-!”
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- (rewatched marineford, I promise and swear I did not cry)
- ace is a bit more mature (not a lot) but he’s more mature than Luffy
- it was such a nice day! You and ace were hanging out on an island as a tiny vacation for the crew
- the crew got some ice cream, went shopping, and stocked up on food for the day
- ace, being the gentleman he is, carried all the bags for you, and even bought you THREE scoops of ice cream (y/n pls give me some this weather is ridiculous💀)
- ace was telling you about a story when he was younger, it was mainly about how Luffy was really stupid and loved to eat random mushrooms from the forest
- “He was SO dumb- it was really bad. He hallucinated for like- 2 days, and almost ate Dadan.”
- “HE ALMOST ATE HER?”
- “HIS TEETH WERE AROUND HER ENTIRE ARM.”
- bro Luffy is wild
- all of the sudden, something tapped you on the shoulder, and you turned around, not seeing anybody behind you
- “Um.. Excuse me?”
- The voice was coming from below, and it sounded like a kid’s voice! As you looked down, you saw this cute little child with brown hair and green eyes, their cheeks were bright pink, and they were holding something behind their back
- “Uh hi there! Did you need something from me?”
- “Um… I- I wanted to give these to you.. I picked them myself.”
- this kid was adorable, they were handing you a hand picked bouquet of flowers!! How adorable is that?! You smiled and pat the kid’s head softly, thanking him for the flowers
- ace had a big grin on his face, he found this kid absolutely adorable too
- “Uh- I think you’re super pretty/handsome! And- I think I really love you!”
- now this is where you both froze and stared at the kid with wide eyes, what did this child just tell you?..
- “I’m sorry what?” -you
- “I love you.” -kid
- “What?” -you
- this poor kid was about to cry, this was his first rejection after all 😭 and you could tell if this kid started crying, holy shit this kid’s going to SCREAM
- “Ok- sorry! I was just confused for a sec.. Are you sure you mean me? Not that little kid over there with the pig tails?”
- this kid was determined, shaking their head as they took your hands in theirs
- Ace was struggling, struggling not to just start cackling, the only thing keeping him from laughing was you pinching his arm
- “Ace don’t even think about laughing.”
- “I’m sorry- *wheeze* this is hilarious.”
- Ace’s face was turning red, bro looked like he was choking on food. But you really didn’t know what to say to this kid- I mean- you’re an adult and this is a literal child. Secondly- ace was your boyfriend already
- “Hey kid, how about I buy you some ice cream and we can talk about y/n together eh?” -ace
- The kid smiled and took Ace’s hand. How cute, your boyfriend was talking to this little kid about all the great aspects of you
- You heard about 1009 compliments today, and it warmed your heart 💜💜
- ace is awesome, 100% husband material
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- doesn’t matter if it’s a child, girl, or animal, he’ll cut them up into pieces if they hurt you or his friends
- but outside of his tough demeanor, zoro was actually pretty loving, especially when the sunny was docked on an island and it was just a day to hang out
- he liked taking naps on you, literally anywhere (he sleeps the best on your ass 💀💀)
- today was not a nap day sadly, but as long as he was with you, today would be a great day
- you had dragged him along to stock up on cola and things for the ship, the whole crew was hanging out on this summery island too
- you weren’t sure why you hadn’t invested some berries into getting a leash for your boyfriend because oh my god
- this bitch keeps getting lost
- you could be looking at some cute shoes for two seconds. TWO SECONDS. And this man disappears, and he somehow ends up on the island next to the one you were on 💀💀
- but anyways, you were now holding him by his collar, keeping this dumbass marimo from running off 👍
- “Y/n are we almost done? I’m kinda tired.”
- “In a second.”
- “you’ve been saying that the past hour.”
- zoro’s feet are about to die
- all of the sudden, a kid tapped your shoulder, looking up at you with wide eyes
- “Oh hello! Did you need something?”
- “Um… I have some flowers for you!”
- The kid handed you a nice bouquet of red, white, and pink roses that were all tied together with a lovely ribbon
- Aw- this little kid was so cute! How nice of them to give you some flowers, right?
- “I- I think I really like you!”
- *pause*
- Maybe this wasn’t so nice 😭
- “Sorry what?” -you
- “I like you!”
- “But- you’re a kid!”
- this kid started sobbing, clinging onto your waist like a baby, crying about how they thought you were so pretty/handsome
- “Hey! It’s ok! Can you let go??”
- zoro was getting pissed, he didn’t like it when kids whined and wailed about stuff, especially about you
- zoro pried the kid off, setting him down with a glare, “Get off y/n, they’re mine, get lost kid.”
- “Hey zoro be nicer! It’s just a kid.”
- “NO! I LOVE Y/N” -kid
- basically this is what happened
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- zoro and this literal child were pulling you back and forth, giving you severe whiplash 💀
- “Omg Robin come over here this is hilarious!!” -nami
- “NAMI PLS HELP ME.” -you
- “I think you’re fine y/n! Just wait until robin gets here!!” -nami
- wow what help you are nami 😭😭
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a/n - Luffy hisses at people and growls 💀
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slvtforoldermen · 2 months
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Pedro’s Characters: The Dick-tionary
How big are Pedro Pascal’s characters and some NSFW headcannons
(WARNING: DETAILS OF PENISES AND TALKS OF SEX - MDNI)
Part Two <3
A/N: Sorry I never continued Fluff February :(, I lost motivation so I’ll just write them and post them as a prompt list for whenever…
Joel Miller:
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Okay, all his characters are big, it’s a known fact, but Joel is 100% the biggest. Probably about 8.5 inches, with a pretty pink mushroom tip, and GIRTHY AGH! There’s a vein on it that is really visible when he’s hard. Oh and his balls are big too. Everything about Joel is just big. Not only is he big but you best believe he knows how to use it too. He’s got a daddy kink… Fav positions are missionary and cowgirl, however when he’s angry doggy or the mating press are a no-brainer. Daddy kink! DOMINANT!!! There’s no way this man is a sub, it just doesn’t work, he’s just so dom yknow, and when he’s soft, he’s the sweetest he’s ever been, but if he’s angry, hard dom Joel comes out and that’s a man you don’t wanna piss off if you wanna cum. He’s got such a daddy kink. “Fuck babygirl/boy, you’re so fucking sweet, sugar. So fucking good for daddy. Yeah baby? You like that? Such a good little girl/boy, so fucking sweet.” Daddy kink is such is a big thing for him. Hair wise? Well it’s the apocalypse so it’s probably hard to find the Manscaper 3000 or whatever. He trims his hair with some scissors, honestly he didn’t really care for shaving before you, so he just let it grow, but once when you were sucking him, you almost sneezed from how much it tickled your nose and made a little joke about it after, which made Joel feel a little bad so he cut them just a little shorter. Oh I’m sorry and did I mention… DADDY KINK!!!
Javier Peña:
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(Here I’m purely writing about Javier Pena in a fictional sense AS PEDRO, not the real guy, this has nothing to do with the real Javier Pena)
Okay, Javier, my baby daddy. Um, who said that- ANYWAYS! Javier is probably the second biggest, in joint place with Oberyn, definitely about 7-7.5 inches, as he’s nicknamed by moi, the Pussy Slayer of Medellin. It goes without saying that Javier is rough, as we’ve seen, side note: I don’t know why I thought watching Narcos with my family would be a good idea… I was sat on the couch like “😀 okay, I’m watching Pedro have sex next to my mum, just a normal Saturday morning…” anyways back to it (hehe Negan reference) but Javier is rough, doggy and cowgirl are his favourite positions, but sometimes when he’s feeling a little somber he likes a little missionary. As how domestically-kinky I like my men, I’m a little disappointed that Javier isn’t a committed man, but he does have a tiny 🤏 breeding kink, he defo isn’t a fan of being called daddy, in fact just call him Javi and he’s yours, and he’s dom obviously. “Oh carino, you take my cock so well, you good little whore… fuck… my sweet little angel.” I mean, we’ve all seen his hair, so do we really need address it, that also might genuinely be my fav sex scene in all of cinema history.
Oberyn Martell
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Okay, admittedly, I haven’t seen any proper scenes of Oberyn, because I’ve just started GOT, so I have no clue what his character is like apart from being a HUGE BISEXUAL SLUT, so he’s just like me 🤭
Oberyn, tying with Javier, is about 7-7.5 inches, and I feel like his cock is definitely a lot more tan than others, idk why, it’s just an instinct. Defo uncircumcised. His fav positions are definitely cowgirl OH and dude is the literal definition of a pillow prince, again, just like me. Suck his dick, please, just suck his dick. Again, I don’t know how he’s presented in GOT, but I’m like 74% sure he’s dominant? From the clips I’ve seen 🫣 Hair wise, do razors exists in the GOT world? Or does my man just shave himself with a sword.
Javi Gutierrez:
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Oh my sweet baby Javi… he’s so kinky. I’m fully convinced he’s into full BDSM, not so much where he has to do it every single time, but maybe like once a month. When I was watching TUWOMT for the first time, when Nick is about to go into the room with all his merch and stuff, I was dead convinced it was gonna be a sex dungeon. There’s no way a man is this sweet and adorable without being into some freaky shit.
Anyway, Javi is about 6.5 inches, with a sweet pink tip and he’s definitely a giver not a taker, don’t get him wrong, he ADORES you with his dick in your mouth, but he prefers to eat you out/suck your dick for hours on end. Oh and he’s a sweet talker, when you guys aren’t being full kinky, he’ll praise you to hours on end, mumbling in your ear how good you are in that sexy accent of his. Is a little bit of a switch, but mostly dominant, soft dom if it’s a normal night but if it’s that special night, only your safe word will pull him out of hard dom space. Definitely the type to overstimulate you in a sweet way “you can take it right sweetheart? Mi amor~ just take my cock nice and good, ahí tienes.” Um, daddy kink for surely, but not like every single night like Joel. But when he’s between your legs, and he’s stimulated you so far into sub space, and you’re struggling to keep your eyes open, and you’re reaching up for him, babbling how good his cock feels in your hole, he can’t help but coo down at you and praise you so hard. He’s not bald, but his hair isn’t long, just trimmed to the point where it tickles your nose when you suck his cock.
Din Djarin
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Okay, so I think it’s canon that Din hasn’t really ever felt human touch, so I feel he’s really inexperienced… but the dude’s got a pretty dick. Like it’s just so… pretty. About 6 inches with a sweet baby pink tip, he’s so sensitive too. He loves head but he really can’t say it, he’s just too embarrassed. I just get the vibe that he’s mostly subby. He tried to be dom once but the poor baby couldn’t handle it all. But then he tried again and he did so good, but it tired him out, so if he’s domming, which is once in a blue moon, he’s going to be soft, maybe even softer than Javi. Mommy/Daddy kink!! “Please, I’m good right? Please, please tell me I’m doing good… you always feel so so good, I love you so much.” Please, he’s so sweet I love him. It’s rare that you guys get off together because of reasons due to his upbringing and stuff so he just likes being taken care of, the sweet boy. Before you, he never really cared for shaving, so when you first strip together, he’s a little nervous about it, and then after that he trims it, quite short.
Marcus Moreno
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If anyone says this man is a hard dom they’re just kidding themselves, this man is the sweetest man out there, obviously not as much as Din ofc <3.
Marcus has an obsession with using his hands, making you cum just by fingering you. Then when he’s inside you, he slips his fingers into your mouth, or around your neck, or on your cheek. His dick is about 7 inches, and like everyone else, knows how to use it perfectly. Angel is one of his favourite nicknames to call you. “My perfect Angel, taking my cock so good baby…” whilst hes thrusting into you ever so gently. Would never EVER do it when Missy is around, so quickies before picking Missy up from school are his go to, but he loves the days where his mom can take her out for the day or even a grandma sleepover so he can be with you for hours. You under him, over him, him inside you, his good girl/boy, his good angel. Pleasuring you until you get numb. The armpit hair in the scene of the gif gets me and idk why, I have never had a thing for armpit hair but maybe I’m just really horny, but his hair down there is nice and trimmed, not bald, never bald.
Tim Rock(Hard)Ford
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Here we go…
Oh Tim man! I have a teensy 🤏 detective kink so when Pedro played this role it was over for me.
Maybe it’s the greying, like Joel, but I feel like he’s huge, just like Joel. He’s 8 inches, living his best life. But he’s just a tired old man, so when he gets home, please just get on your knees for him, he’ll just lay there, stroking your hair, praising you, telling you how good you suck his cock. Then he’ll bring you up to the bed and return the favour, making sure to always get you to tell him about your day as he does so. Saturday nights are always his favourite time to rail into you, he’s had the whole day off, just resting, watching you walk around, getting him so worked up. He has a domestic kink. So seeing you do chores get him so hard. Loves fucking between your thighs when you’re sleeping because he gets home so late and just needs a little relief, but you look so cute and peaceful while you sleep and because he’s so considerate, he doesn’t wanna wake you. “So good for me baby, so good for daddy, gonna fill you up, you’re not gonna let any of my cum slip out right, gonna keep it all in your tummy, yeah, that’s it, cum for me.” TALKS YOU THROUGH IT!!! Sleeps naked. Not trimmed, not shaved, just grows it out, he’s old so he doesn’t care, it’s not like anyone but you would be seeing him like this anyways.
Dieter Bravo
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I love Dieter, he’s so cute.
Not dom, but not sub either, just dom enough to see you break under him but sub enough to whimper and get soooo desperate. Such a huge pillow prince, he loves it when you suck him, especially when you grab his balls and caress them, he cums so quick when that happens. He’s about 6.5 inches, and it loves fast, not as in quickie, but he loves seeing you fall apart as he jackhammers into your hole. When you ride him he gets so sweet, and he can last long, don’t worry, but you just look so pretty on top of him, he can’t help it, please don’t be mad at him. Has a thing for dry humping, especially in the morning when he’s too lazy to move properly. “So good baby, oh yeah, fuck, grind against me just like that, mmmf fuck…” loves to beg and watch you beg, he’s so good to and for you, don’t doubt him ever. He doesn’t shave, he trims it, but he’s so goofy, so once he shaved it into a heart.
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Yuus Food Truck
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In which Azul loses his mind over a grilled cheese.
Content stuff: short, one sided enemies to lovers, Azul being a loser, general cringe.
Posting Reqs like this for a bit until Tumblr lets us edit asks. I had a request for Enemies to Lovers with Azul, so I came up with this.
That goddamned Prefect was the bane of Azul's existence. For the past few weeks, he has been gripping his leg in absolute rage within his office as he stares at his weekly reports. Practically frothing at the mouth at the mere mention of you.
Recently, the little Ramshackle prefect has begun a new business venture. A simple food truck on campus selling only grilled cheeses for a singular madol. That's it. He found the idea a bit funny, he'll admit, but he was far from worried.
Surely after a month it would shut down, or at the very least get so few customers it wouldn't impact his business. I mean come on, how much money are you really making from selling grilled cheeses for one dollar? You must be taking a loss!
He was wrong. So so wrong.
Not only have you somehow been profiting from your little side project, but you have taken all of his customers. He is looking over his lounge, nowhere near as full as it usually is. He grits his teeth and heads back into the VIP room. The twins should be here any minute now. 
On cue, the door creaks open, and in come those rowdy twins both with their usual smirks. Azul jerks up, staring up at Jade from his desk. His hand shook ever slightly as he gripped the feather in his hand.
“Well? Did you get it?” The mer asks, gaze steely. Floyd speaks for the both of them through mouthfuls of grilled cheese.
“Mmmhmm yeah, we got you a cheese, here you go. Mmmm.” Floyd took another bite of his as he tossed the wrapped-up grilled cheese onto the desk. 
“Hey watch the merchandise– Are you eating their food?" Azul stared at both of them. Floyd stuffing his face with the one in his hand and Jade elegantly nibbling on his own. He was shocked, betrayed by his own staff. “You guys gave them more money— ugh. I would have expected this of Floyd but you too Jade?”
“The prefect saw me ordering and put some mushrooms into mine that pair well with the cheese. Free of charge as well. How thoughtful of them. I must commend their customer service.” Jade wore a shit-eating smirk on his face as he took another bite, making a show out of it. He seemed to relish in Azul's misery.
“Free of charge?” Azul was flabbergasted. Not only were their prices ridiculously low but they were adding things for free? They might as well be handing their money away at that point.
“Right? I say they should have charged Jade for all he's worth for putting those damn things on. Yuck…” Floyd wrinkled his nose as he side eyed Jade, who just continued to eat blissfully. 
He needed to figure out just what was so good about the damn things. Gloved hands carefully lifted up the wrapped delicacy with such fragility as if it would break from a gust of wind. The wrapping was done well, nice and neat as he peeled it off to reveal what was inside.
Crisped and perfectly brown buttered white bread. It glistened in the light with its heavenly beauty. The cheese was ooey and gooey and so thick that it ran down the sides. So far the presentation was beautiful, but it was pretty damn difficult to fucked up a grilled cheese. He tried to hold back this drool from the smell alone.
Carefully, he took a bite and closed his eyes. His mouth was blasted with flavor. As he savored that magical bite, a gust of wind swept through the room, causing the curtains to dance dramatically. The cheesy aroma lingered, creating an ambiance fit for a culinary masterpiece. This grilled cheese has unlocked secrets of the universe with how much it expanded his mind. This mere sandwich has him on the brink of tears
Azul has to hold his expression. He's not gonna be impressed by some measly sandwich. He's better than that. Though he thought that maybe by tasting it he could be able to figure out what your secret ingredient was, it's clear that isn't the case… This is a simple grilled cheese. He would have to go undercover to discover your cooking secrets.
***
“Heyyy Prefect!” A wry voice hums near the truck, belonging to no other than Ruggie. He knocked on the side of the window and Yuu poked out their head.
Azul watched from the distance, narrowing his eyes as he hyper-focused on the conversation. He admits the front of the Ramshackle dorms was a great location. Close to the botanical garden, close to the main building, not as far as Octavinelle either, and had most of the foot traffic. It's why he had his eye on it for a second location.
“Well if it isn't my number one customer, what can I get ya, let me guess a grilled cheese?” Of course, Ruggie would be their number one customer, which makes sense given his financial state. Figures. Maybe if he introduced a dollar menu…
“You know what Ruggie, you're cool. For you, it's 50 cents. Two for one if you will.” Ruggie pauses for a moment before smiling again. “Awe really? Sweet, can't up a deal like that shyehehehe!” The hyena cackles and you get to work. The window for the truck is fully open, allowing Azul to see in.
You aren't even hiding your cooking technique?! You're just giving all your secrets away like that?! Ohh you foolish fool… This would be easier than he thought.
He must get closer, to see what sort of fuckery is at play here. However, walking up and just watching you cook work is suspicious. As much as he hates to fund this little project… sacrifices must be made… He will have to order a grilled cheese…
Ruggie slinks off, tail wagging happily as he munches on his food. This was the perfect opportunity to approach. He stood up even straighter and approached with determination hidden poorly behind his attempt at a straight face. His scowl dared to seep through but he managed to smooth it out into his sickenly sweet facade.
“Hello, dear prefect!” He watched Yuu perk up through the window as they wiped down their workspace. They glanced over at Azul, completely unaware of his evil plot. “Heya Zuzu what can I get ya?”
Zuzu? That's awfully bold… whatever eyes on the prize… 
“I'd like one grilled cheese please if I may…” Hell yes. Smooth operator. He's so good at this.
“Mkay, coming right up.” Azul leans in closer as you get to work, memorizing everything you do… You just make a grilled cheese… Nothing special. It's just simple bread and cheese you cook in butter. How the hell? Was it the oven perhaps? Did you somehow know of his intentions and we're trying to conceal it?? Ugh, whatever maybe he can sucker you into another deal.
“... You know Prefect, if you just raised the price a bit you'd be bringing in more profits.” 
You shrugged as you pressed down your creation with your spatula to make it sizzle more. “Yeah, I know how money works.” Azul paused and blinked.
“So why don't you do it?” You shrug again. “It's funny.” Azul was perplexed, bamboozled, perhaps even smeckledorfed perchance. You were doing this for fun?! Starting a business for fun. Not for profit which would be beneficial given your situation, but for fun.
“Fun? Really? But prefect– wouldn't you– shouldn't you consider raising the prices even slightly? I mean after all Crowley hasn't been paying you well and if anything—”
“I should shoot you for the mere suggestion of raising the grilled cheese prices. The price is firm. It's never going up even by a cent. Hell, I'm so offended I may lower it.” You pulled the cheese off the grill and started to pack it up, swaddling it with such delicacy and love reserved for newborns.
Azul's mouth hung open for a bit before closing it. “Are you serious? Prefect— Yuu at this point I'm not even mad about the competition I'm– hrk!”  
“You need to relax a little Azul, for your own sake.” You shoved the grilled cheese out the window a bit more forcefully than you intended, making the unwrapped part hit Azul's glasses. The melty butter left grease marks on them, and through the blurriness, he could see your expression. His heart skipped a beat and sucked in a breath. Oh no.
He was in love.
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nkogneatho · 1 year
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𝐁𝐋𝐔𝐄 𝐋𝐎𝐂𝐊 𝐃!𝐂𝐊 𝐀𝐍𝐀𝐋𝐘𝐒𝐈𝐒.
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#emergency commissions!!
#mlist #taglist #liawot #whoreclub
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—Characters- Isagi, Shidou, Nagi, Rin, Bachira, Barou.
—cw: gut clenching, deep, vulg@r analysis, gagging, choking, size kink, hex codes.
—A/n: You can hate me but you can't disagree with me on this. Writing this made my mum whoop my ass because the milk on the stove burnt while I was thinking about the color of Barou's cock.
Reblogs are highly appreciated.
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𝐈𝐒𝐀𝐆𝐈 𝐘𝐎𝐈𝐂𝐇𝐈
code: #EBC4A7
Alright listen. Yoichi's dick is not too girthy, not too long. BUT, it's just perfect. It's 5.7 inch. The head takes up about an inch. It's not fat but rather a bit aligned with the body of his dick. It's perfect because he slides in so easily, your juices and the skin on his shaft creating noises that are nore lewd than your moans. He isn't really veiny but there are slight green traces visible. If you lick a stripe on it, you can feel the veins on your tongue. Yoichi loves the way you adore his dick. You know how his personality switches up so fast in the field when he scores? Yeah he feels the same shit when you have your eyes scan that perfection. He really has a pretty face and a pretty dick. Yoichi is proud of his size though. He doesn't care about having a big monster cock(eyeing bachira rn) because he still has you moaning, screaming, whimpering his name when he rails you after a win.
𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐃𝐎𝐔 𝐑𝐘𝐔𝐔𝐒𝐄𝐈
Code: #734125
Here me out. Shidou is just a little longer than average but fat asf. He really doesn't give to fucks about being longer because that fat meat??? That cock will slide in anyone and rewire their brain into loving his size. He is girthy, it looks like a big love sausage (not my words. that's what he calls it. Slut asf). You know when he is getting turned on, his dick does that spring thing where it slowly gets up until his mushroom tip has surpassed the trimmed hair on his crotch. You thought that shit only happens in porn but Mr. Shidpu Ryuusei from big dick community proved you wrong. Speaking of tips, Shidou's tip is fat, one shade lighter than his brown base. He has a pretty visible opening on it. You can always see the way his cum seeps out and falls on your face (if you are lucky enough to dodge the string of it reaching your lashes, blurring your vision because this mf always shoots it near your eyes) He does it on purpose btw.
𝐈𝐓𝐎𝐒𝐇𝐈 𝐑𝐈𝐍
Code: #F2BCA5
Oh boy!! Rin has a long one. We're talking about atleast 6.5 to 7 inches. Again the one where his length makes up for the girth. So what if it isn't fat? it's long enough for you to choke on it. It is frustrating because you always struggle swallowing him whole. Rin wants nothing but to hit the back of your throat while your lips atleast brush against his balls but it is impossible to do so without gagging. He knows it, but he'llnevwr show that smug expressionon his face. Instead he's awarding himself for making you gag on it, internally. He always needs to guide you to it. His dick is like a lighter peach color, but the tip is pink. Again the tip isn't what is big but the body of his cock. You have to have a hand at the base to make sure you are stimulating his whole shaft while giving him head.
𝐍𝐀𝐆𝐈 𝐒𝐄𝐈𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐎
Code: #F2CDC2
Nah cuz Nagi really won. He us another guy who's dick is as pretty as him. Like we're talking about immaculate facial feature and a beautiful dick??? *Chefs kiss* Now about the size, it looks the right size, right? But you're proven wrong because he is one of those guys who gets bigger as he is more turned on. You underestimate him, thinking you can take him, but tears brim your eyes when you find his tip kissing the spot, and he isn't even fully in yet. AND HE HAS THE NEVER TO SMILE AS YOU STRUGGLE TO TAKE HIM IN. He isn't even mocking you. That's just Nagi Seishiro's amused expression. Again Nagi has a pretty similar tip as a Isagi. It isn't a big mushroom tip but a bulge that softens as it follows the lines on the cock. Sei has a color somewhat similar between a pink and peach, with a cooler undertone.
𝐁𝐀𝐂𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐀 𝐌𝐄𝐆𝐔𝐑𝐔
Code: #EEC0A2
Haha all the best y'all. He is one of those guys who looks short but has a monster cock hidden inside his pants. He is so casual about it though for what??? Like sir hello?? I can see that dick print through the sweats. Bachira never flexed about his size. He didn't care and thought it never mattered. It's so funny that he gets confused when you widen your eyes when he is out of the shower ALL NAKED, and you have to witness it all hard, fat and sprung up becaus ehe was in there thinking about you. He has very visible veins on his cock. You can the dark and light green lines on them. Despite having a big dick, Bachira makes sure to ease it in you. He has a fished-mouth tip, flushed rose pink color, and he cums a lot. I am talking thick ropes spurting on your stomach when he pulls out.
𝐁𝐀𝐑𝐎𝐔 𝐒𝐇𝐎𝐔𝐄𝐈
Code: #FCDDC7
I am being biased here but I couldn't give two shits about it because I know y'all will agree. Listen. HORSE COCK BAROU. You know it bitch. Don't deny. He is biiig. You thought he was fucking around when he said he has a big package but DAMN. Homeboy wasn't lying when you saw him in the locker room for the first time, with a boner that surpasses his belly button. You gulp down after a while of hanging your jaw open with awe. Barou had thick veins baby. Dotted condom who??? We have Barou with them thick veins that pleasure you the way no mfing condom can. He also has fat balls which means now you get why he has the balls to call others donkey and that king complex shit of his. About his tip? Yeah it takes up about 1.5 inches of his cock, and pops out like champagne cork when he pulls out of you.
Thank you for coming to my TEDtalk. I am your host, pasi. REBLOG REBLOG REBLOG for part 2
Tagging: @milophiliac @satorhime @witchofoe @gojoest @tetsuclez @pu-re-love @sugardaddyreo @loml-riri @aztecbrujeria @his-saiko
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phillip-bankss · 3 months
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you ever heard of this funny little indie game called “Super Mario bros”… ya idk its pretty underground…. its kind of out there but hear me out, theres this guy whose a plumber named mario but he does all kinds of parkour n shit its dope… he eats mushrooms 🍄 n theres a little shroom guy named toad … funny rite…
and mario a sexy ass brother…. and he fights this big turtle guy who kidnaps a princess….u should check it out u might like it😎
mario a sexy ass brother
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