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#possible focal aware seizures
wtfcl0ud · 5 months
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and then god said you will have only the most subjective (meaning there is no or little way to actually prove it through like a blood test or smth) physical and mental conditions and symptoms
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cpunkwitch · 5 months
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so theres a thing my ody does thats been happening more and more frequently
and i started debating with myself if it could be some kind of seizure, but since im awake and aware while it happens that didnt seem right and i usually passed it off as just uncontrolable stimming however because its been more frequent and getting worse i looked into it more
i found focal aware seizures are a thing
but ive never been diagnosed with epilepsy nor has anyone in my family that i know of
so im scared and not sure what else it could be nor how else to lookfurther into this
i feel sick again, my nerves are still a wreck lke the other day when i talked about feeling horrile and had issues with my legs, im still shaking and yeah it happened again between 3:30am and 4am-ish
i was laying on my back in bed while it happened, my body jerked forward and my head went back and it happened so suddenly i cut off my own air supply and choked for a second.
very likely this is being brought on my all the stress im under but it still terifies me, i cant sleep, and i have no clue what to do
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epilepsyculture-is · 1 year
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Epilepsy culture is desperately trying to look and act as normal as possible after having the most terryfying focal aware seizure in public
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osamu-dazai-is-mine · 4 months
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I went to neurologist today and found out that I was having focal aware seizures for 4 months and uhhhh idk how I feel about that! Like good to know that I possibly won't have tonic-clonic seizures but now I feel bad about hanging out with people knowing that I had seizure during that :c
Like sure I can't control it, and had no idea at the time, but it feels wrong??? Idk
But also I can't just isolate myself because I'm epileptic and might possibly weird someone out ig
Ahhhh this is weird, I thought feeling hangover and having "distressing vivid dreams about daily life" while sometimes sleepwalking were strange but I had no idea it could be epilepsy???
Hopefully higher dose of antiepileptics will help, so far I've only been getting worse :/ I'm on topiramate and it used to work so well and now I feel like it's wearing off ahhhhh
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ilovemyyorkie · 6 months
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Understanding Seizures in Yorkshire Terriers: The Causes, Symptoms, and Treatments
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Seizures in Yorkshire Terriers can be a concerning topic for many dog owners. Seizures can be caused by a variety of medical conditions and can lead to serious health issues if left untreated. It is important for dog owners to be aware of the signs and symptoms of seizures in Yorkshire Terriers to ensure that their pets receive the proper care and treatment. Understanding Seizures in Yorkshire Terriers is crucial for pet owners. Seizures can be caused by a variety of factors, including genetics, liver disease, and brain tumors. It is important for dog owners to be aware of these potential causes and to seek veterinary care if their pet experiences seizures. With the right guidance and care, it is possible for Yorkshire Terriers to lead a seizure-free life. Key Takeaways - Seizures in Yorkshire Terriers can be caused by a variety of medical conditions and can lead to serious health issues if left untreated. - Understanding the potential causes of seizures in Yorkshire Terriers is crucial for pet owners. - With the right guidance and care, it is possible for Yorkshire Terriers to lead a seizure-free life.
Understanding Seizures in Yorkshire Terriers
Yorkshire Terriers are prone to seizures, which can be a puzzling and concerning topic for pet owners. In this section, we will discuss the causes, types, symptoms, and signs of seizures in Yorkshire Terriers. Causes of Seizures There are many different causes of seizures in Yorkshire Terriers. Some of the most common causes include genetic predisposition, idiopathic epilepsy, and symptomatic epilepsy. Other causes may include brain tumors, head trauma, liver disease, kidney failure, and exposure to toxins. Types of Seizures There are several types of seizures that can affect Yorkshire Terriers. These include focal seizures, generalized seizures, and psychomotor seizures. Focal seizures are characterized by abnormal limb movements on one side of the body, while generalized seizures affect the entire brain and can cause convulsions and loss of consciousness. Psychomotor seizures are characterized by abnormal behavior, such as excessive licking or biting. Symptoms and Signs of Seizure Symptoms and signs of seizure in Yorkshire Terriers can vary depending on the type and severity of the seizure. Some common symptoms include sudden collapse, loss of consciousness, stiffening of the limbs, drooling, and foaming at the mouth. Other signs may include uncontrolled urination or defecation, abnormal eye movements, and vocalizations. If your Yorkshire Terrier experiences a seizure, it is important to remain calm and keep them safe from harm. Move any objects that could cause injury out of the way, and do not attempt to restrain your dog. Instead, wait for the seizure to pass and then seek veterinary care if necessary. In conclusion, seizures in Yorkshire Terriers can be a challenging issue for pet owners to manage. By understanding the causes, types, symptoms, and signs of seizures, you can better care for your furry friend and seek appropriate treatment if necessary.
Medical Conditions Leading to Seizures
Seizures in Yorkshire Terriers can be caused by a variety of medical conditions. In this section, we will discuss some of the most common medical conditions that can lead to seizures in Yorkies. Liver Shunt A liver shunt is a congenital abnormality where the liver is not able to properly filter toxins from the blood. This can lead to a buildup of toxins in the bloodstream, which can cause seizures. Yorkies with liver shunts may also display symptoms such as stunted growth, vomiting, and diarrhea. Diagnosis of a liver shunt can be done through blood tests and ultrasound. Treatment may involve surgery to correct the abnormality. Hypoglycemia Hypoglycemia, or low blood sugar, can also cause seizures in Yorkies. This is especially common in young puppies who have not yet developed the ability to regulate their blood sugar levels. Symptoms of hypoglycemia include lethargy, weakness, and seizures. Treatment may involve administering glucose or sugar to raise blood sugar levels. Brain Tumors Brain tumors can also cause seizures in Yorkies. These tumors can be either benign or malignant and can develop in various parts of the brain. Symptoms of brain tumors may include seizures, changes in behavior, and loss of coordination. Diagnosis of a brain tumor may involve MRI or CT scans. Treatment may involve surgery, radiation therapy, or chemotherapy. It's important to note that these are not the only medical conditions that can lead to seizures in Yorkies. Other conditions such as kidney disease, hydrocephalus, and cerebrospinal fluid abnormalities may also cause seizures. If your Yorkie is experiencing seizures, it's important to consult with a veterinarian to determine the underlying cause and appropriate treatment.
Treatment and Management of Seizures
When it comes to treating seizures in Yorkshire Terriers, there are a few different options available. The best treatment plan will depend on the severity and frequency of the seizures, as well as any underlying health conditions that may be contributing to the problem. In this section, we'll take a closer look at some of the most common treatment options for seizures in Yorkies. Medication One of the most common treatments for seizures in dogs is medication. There are several different medications that may be prescribed to help manage seizures in Yorkshire Terriers, including phenobarbital, potassium bromide, and Keppra. These medications work by reducing the frequency and severity of seizures, and they may be used alone or in combination with other treatments. Phenobarbital is one of the most commonly prescribed medications for seizures in dogs, including Yorkies. It is an anticonvulsant that works by slowing down the activity in the brain that can lead to seizures. While phenobarbital can be very effective at managing seizures, it can also have some side effects, including increased thirst and appetite, lethargy, and difficulty walking. Potassium bromide is another medication that may be used to treat seizures in Yorkies. It is also an anticonvulsant, and it works by reducing the activity of certain chemicals in the brain that can trigger seizures. Potassium bromide can be very effective at managing seizures, but it can also have some side effects, including vomiting, diarrhea, and loss of appetite. Keppra is a newer medication that may be used to treat seizures in Yorkies. It works by reducing the activity of certain chemicals in the brain that can trigger seizures. Keppra is generally well-tolerated by dogs, and it has fewer side effects than some other medications. However, it can be more expensive than other options. Surgery In some cases, surgery may be recommended to treat seizures in Yorkshire Terriers. This is usually only considered when other treatment options have been unsuccessful, and when the seizures are caused by a specific underlying condition, such as a brain tumor. Surgery can be a very effective way to manage seizures in Yorkies, but it is also a very invasive and risky procedure. It should only be considered as a last resort, and only after a thorough evaluation by a veterinary neurologist. Lifestyle Changes In addition to medication and surgery, there are also some lifestyle changes that may help manage seizures in Yorkies. These can include changes to the dog's feeding schedule, as well as the addition of supplements like omega-3 fatty acids. Feeding your Yorkie smaller, more frequent meals throughout the day can help stabilize blood sugar levels, which can in turn help reduce the frequency of seizures. Omega-3 fatty acids, which are found in fish oil supplements, may also help reduce inflammation in the brain, which can be a contributing factor in seizures. Overall, the best treatment plan for seizures in Yorkshire Terriers will depend on a variety of factors, including the severity and frequency of the seizures, as well as any underlying health conditions that may be contributing to the problem. With the right treatment plan in place, however, it is possible to manage seizures and help improve your Yorkie's quality of life.
Prevention and Safety Measures
Seizures in Yorkshire Terriers can be scary and unpredictable, but there are steps we can take to help prevent them from happening. In this section, we will discuss some of the most important prevention and safety measures that you can take to keep your Yorkie healthy and safe. Training One of the most important things you can do to prevent seizures in your Yorkie is to train them well. This includes teaching them basic obedience commands, such as sit, stay, and come, as well as ensuring that they are socialized properly. A well-trained Yorkie is less likely to become stressed or anxious, which can trigger seizures. Monitoring Monitoring your Yorkie's behavior and health is also crucial in preventing seizures. Keep an eye out for any changes in behavior, such as lethargy, confusion, or disorientation. If you notice any of these symptoms, it's important to take your Yorkie to the vet as soon as possible. Lead Safety Another important safety measure is to ensure that your Yorkie is always on a lead when outside, as this can help prevent falls and trauma. Additionally, make sure that your Yorkie is always supervised when outside, as they can be prone to eating toxic substances, such as rat poison or chocolate. Toxin and Poison Safety Speaking of toxins and poisons, it's important to keep these substances out of reach of your Yorkie. This includes flea powder, which can be toxic if ingested, as well as any household cleaners or chemicals. If you suspect that your Yorkie has ingested something toxic, seek veterinary attention immediately. Lyme Disease Prevention Lyme disease is a tick-borne illness that can cause seizures in dogs. To prevent Lyme disease, make sure that your Yorkie is always up-to-date on their tick prevention medication, and check them for ticks regularly. Electrolyte Balance Electrolyte imbalances can also trigger seizures in dogs. To maintain proper electrolyte balance, make sure that your Yorkie has access to clean, fresh water at all times, and feed them a well-balanced, nutritious diet. Stress Management Stress can also be a trigger for seizures in Yorkies. To help manage stress, make sure that your Yorkie has a comfortable and safe space to retreat to when feeling anxious or overwhelmed. Temperature Control Finally, it's important to keep your Yorkie's body temperature regulated, as overheating or hypothermia can also trigger seizures. Make sure that your Yorkie has access to a cool, shaded area in the summer, and a warm, cozy space in the winter. By following these prevention and safety measures, you can help keep your Yorkie healthy and seizure-free. Remember, if you ever suspect that your Yorkie is experiencing a seizure, seek veterinary attention immediately. Read the full article
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bansalhospital · 8 months
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Patients And Carers Guide To Mesial Temporal Sclerosis
The mesial temporal lobe is the region of the brain that is specifically affected by this illness.  Memory and emotional processing are crucial mental processes controlled by this brain area. These processes are disturbed by mesial temporal sclerosis, making recalling information and feeling emotions challenging. 
Here, we will learn about mesial temporal sclerosis. Find out more about how it influences the complex processes that go on in our thoughts.
Mesial Temporal Sclerosis (MTS) Overview
The mesial temporal lobe systems, notably the hippocampus and amygdala, scar or harden in Mesial Temporal Sclerosis (MTS), a clinical condition. Deep within the brain, the mesial temporal lobe plays a crucial role in memory formation and emotional control.
MTS is typically associated with epilepsy and is one of the most common causes of temporal lobe epilepsy that is resistant to treatment. It is estimated that mesial temporal sclerosis is present in between 60-80% of people with temporal lobe epilepsy. Not everyone who has MTS will develop epilepsy, though.
The most prevalent MTS symptom is temporal lobe epilepsy, described by repeated seizures from the temporal lobe in question. Complex partial seizures accompanied by altered consciousness, emotional changes, and memory difficulties can be a symptom of these seizures.
Additionally, some people may enjoy generalised tonic-clonic seizures. MTS is typically diagnosed using a combination of medical assessment, neurological examination, an imaging study (including magnetic resonance imaging, or MRI), and mesial temporal sclerosis eeg to detect unusual brain activity at some point in seizures.
Symptoms Of Mesial Temporal Sclerosis 
Mesial Temporal Sclerosis (MTS) is frequently linked to temporal lobe epilepsy, and MTS patients frequently experience seizures as a result of their symptoms. The particular signs and symptoms can vary from person to person. However, the following are some common ones:
1. Focused Seizures
The most common type of MTS-related seizure is a focal seizure, also known as a partial seizure. The mesial temporal lobe in question is the source of these seizures. Depending on the specific brain area affected by focal seizures, the symptoms are experienced throughout. 
2. Modified Recognizability
At some point during the seizure, the person may also experience a change in attention or awareness, ranging from mild bewilderment to a total absence of focus.
3. Changes In Sensation
Additionally, they could experience strange feelings like tingling or numbness or feel as though the current circumstance has happened before.
4. Traffic Signs
Additionally, certain body parts may twitch, move repeatedly, or engage in automatisms (repeated, pointless actions like hand rubbing or mouth smacking).
5. Changes In Emotion Or Behaviour
Alterations in emotional responses can give rise to a wide range of feelings, including worry, tension, wrath, and even euphoria.
People affected with MTS experience symptoms more or less frequently and to varying degrees of severity. Consequently, we need to keep a close eye on the symptoms and get the necessary medical assistance as soon as possible.
When Should I See A Doctor? 
As Mesial Temporal Sclerosis (MTS) is a prevalent cause of epilepsy, you must visit a doctor if you experience recurrent seizures or unexplained changes in seizure activity. Memory issues, particularly problems creating new memories, maybe a sign of MTS and require medical treatment. 
Additionally, it is crucial to speak with a healthcare provider if you experience chronic symptoms like behavioural changes, linguistic issues, or cognitive deterioration. Getting medical help can help with an accurate diagnosis and effective MTS management.
The Final Say
A medical illness known as Mesial Temporal Sclerosis (MTS) is described by the mesial temporal lobe structures, namely the hippocampus and amygdala scarring or hardening. Memory issues, emotional abnormalities, and focal seizures are common signs and symptoms of MTS, which are generally associated with temporal lobe epilepsy. Children can exhibit it as well. Clinical evaluation, neuroimaging, and electroencephalography are frequently used to make the diagnosis. 
The primary goal of MTS treatment is to prevent seizures, which may be accomplished by using antiepileptic medications and, in some instances, surgical surgery. The success of the treatment can differ from person to person. Thus, a tailored strategy is essential. 
MTS can significantly negatively influence a person's lifestyle, emphasising the value of thorough research, continued hospital care, and counselling. The effectiveness of diagnostic procedures and therapeutic interventions will be improved by ongoing research and advances in our understanding of MTS. Visit the neurology department at Bansal Hospital for treatment. 
About Bansal Hospital
Bansal Hospital is a multispeciality hospital and is one of the leading, reputable and reliable healthcare providers trusted by patients and their families across the region. It has all the major departments, including cardiology, neurology, oncology, orthopaedics, gastroenterology, urology, liver transplant, bone marrow transplantation, nephrology, gynaecology and more. The hospital is equipped with state-of-the-art facilities and technology. It has a team of highly qualified and experienced doctors and medical staff who provide round-the-clock care to the patient.
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jacobsonkramer · 2 years
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Can Cats Have Seizures
cat blog Seizures will be among the scariest things pet dog proprietors may possibly need to have to manage. We often focus our knowledge involving episodes on canine proprietors, especially those with unique types. Nevertheless can cats have seizures as nicely? In that case, what should an individual do in case your kitty has a stroke? And also what exactly can we do as vets? What is a Seizure? A new seizure is definitely a unsuccsefflull express involving excitation in the mind that causes unusual electrical pastime. The reason is definitely comprised of cells known as neurons. These are such as telephone cables that attach each part of the mind and allow it to help give outside messages all-around the body. Neurons can be endorsed by the electric power task to bring messages and cause an result, such as moving lean muscle mass. Generally, there is a equilibrium in the brain among excitation and even constraint; a few neurons is going to be energetic very well, as some will be lazy. It indicates the brain can collaborate alone and likewise does not attain weighed down. Nevertheless, if there is usually a new seizure, a whole lot more of the brain is excited, and millions involving different neurons are taking pictures; mental performance and the entire body can not really cope using all these signals, leading to signs and symptoms associated with seizures. Seizures can become triggered by means of troubles outdoors the brain (extracranial), such as toxicities, electrolyte irregularities, a lack of oxygen, or hyperthermia. Alternatively, a seizure can be triggered simply by troubles within the brain (intracranial), initiated by simply damages, infection, or bloodstream clots inside the mind. Almost any pet of any age can offer a good seizure. Seizures regularly present as body-wide convulsions (though this varies, like we will see later on), as all the muscles are being informed with regards to relocating by the overexcited neurons. Various other common signals consist of behavioral adjustments, trash, urination, defaecation, and the decrease of awareness. If without treatment, seizures can lead to comfortable stroke, heart and numerous other system body organ deterioration, injury, as well as fatality. Epilepsy This is a group of nerve problems that trigger normal seizures. Frequent human brain problem brings about recurring over-excitation on the brain together with epileptic seizures. Epilepsy can easily be caused by actual trouble or an unidentified efficient problem within typically the mind. We usually condition that any animal with two or even extra attacks within a brief amount of time (variable) has epilepsy. Can Felines Include Seizures? Like all animals, pet cats could indeed include seizures. Even so, there are various important differences between pet seizures (the animal we most often see booty in practice) and cats. Seizures around felines are much rarer when compared with pet dogs. Nevertheless, they tend to be not complicated. Some researchers declare up to be able to 2% of the cat population have shows. Seizures prevail in actually aged older dogs, whereas in canine cats, most attacks will be seen in aged pets or animals; more young felines can get seizures, but that is a lot much less common. This is mainly because a large amount of the cause causes of seizures in pet cats are in connection with aging. Pet cats furthermore often tend to own various warning signs contrasted to be able to pets. Pets tend in order to have popularized seizures exactly where most of their head is seizure- these happen to be the 'traditional' seizures in which the entire body convulses. Pet cats are most likely to possess focal or even partial seizures. This is where only one part with the mind has seizure pastime. Therefore, the signs may be a good lot quite a bit more delicate. Symptoms around pet pet cats with partial seizures consist of drool, licking, aggression, serious ingesting, cosmetic twitching, vocalization, hiding, together with other unconventional conduct. Cats can still have general seizures as explained more than, or partial seizures can proceed to popularized. Strong seizure exercise can transpire numerous times within quick periods (collection seizures) or can last for a number of a few minutes (status epilepticus)-- both are disasters. Cancers cells Amongst 1 of the most usual intracranial disorders in older pet cats and kittens is regretfully cancer-- old cats can certainly develop cancer inside the thought process that expands and even clicks the healthy brain about it. This causes dysfunction as well as seizure pastime. One of often the most typical seizure-causing cancers cells in felines are meningioma, lymphoma as properly as glioma. These cancer cells typically cause several other symptoms, such as gradual neurological concerns, weight reduction, behavioral changes, and toileting adjustments. Treatment method is hard, and likewise diagnosis varies. Cerebrovascular events Vascular (blood vessel) condition is an additional normal cause for seizures in kittens and cats. Heart disease is a unique search for inside old pet cats, generally concerning heart problems, renal ailment, hyperthyroidism, diabetes mellitus, plus even more. High blood pressure gives concerning elevated stress around mental performance the fact that can create neurological issues and seizures. Seizures could also be triggered by means of the absence of fresh air reaching the brain-- many of us aren't sure exactly why that takes place in pet cats. Nevertheless, this may be relevant to blood clots, reduced low blood pressure, or, if you usually are in the UNITED SAYS, selected types of bloodsucker. Metabolic problem Metabolic malocclusions, in addition to additional diseases, are rather widespread in older cats. Elderly pet cats generally have an illness of the failing liver or perhaps kidneys-- these internal organs will be in charge of taking away unhealthy toxins from the total body. If they aren't working hard, these hazardous things can easily reach the mind as well as trigger seizures. We call these conditions hepatic encephalopathy and also suprarrenal encephalopathy, respectively. Hyperthyroidism (overactive thyroid) might also result in seizures, enhancing the particular mind's breathable oxygen and blood sugar need. In case the body should not supply these, the reason deprives as well as may seizure. Various other causes connected with hypoglycemia (low blood vessels sugar) cause seizures in the comparable means. " Real" Epilepsy Idiopathic epilepsy (this is normally epilepsy without an clear reason) was once believed to become rare in pet kittens and cats, specifically when compared to be able to pet dogs. Even so, recent studies own disclosed that this is a good many more frequent than we believed. Several of these pet kittens and cats ended up younger, between age range one and 7. When your feline has normal seizures and is also more younger, idiopathic epilepsy may end up being more likely. Poisoning Much like pet dogs, many hazardous substances can cause seizures also. Toxins influence family pet cats connected with any sort of age, although outdoor pet cats might be a little more likely to eat some thing these people shouldn't. Typical toxins consist of lead, rat contaminant, permethrin flea products, manures, and even more. Infections Finally, specific transmittable representatives can result in seizures around pet cats and kittens of all ages. There is an unpleasant condition in feline cats called feline infectious peritonitis (FIP), brought on by simply an infection. It mostly brings about liquids accumulation in the particular lungs in addition to abdominal places, yet that can bring about brain skin lesions that develop seizures. Toxoplasmosis is one more illness caused by a good vermine, which can provide about episodes-- toxoplasmosis rarely at any time invades mental performance and even mainly creates stomach worries. Ultimately, a infection identified as Cryptococcus that can are now living in a cat's nose often attacks via the brain in severe cases, producing seizures (although this is definitely relatively uncommon). The fungus infection are abnormal in typically the UK). Although seizures are usually not a regular event, quite a few pets have one particular episode in their life and by no means uncover seizure assignments when more. It is probable that if your pet kitten has a seizure which is fine after that, an individual do not need to fret. Nonetheless, the idea is definitely an exceptional idea to debate this with your animal medical practitioner as soon as you can. These people will possibly recommend viewing on them and furthermore trying to keep an eye out and about for additional seizure action. If your feline gets more significant than one seizure within six months, even further test is generally suggested. Inspect your household pets signs or symptoms If your cat features a new seizure, you will discover a good variety of actions you will need to take. Firstly, examine some time. An tv show is brought on simply by increased task inside the mind, so it is valuable to reduce pleasure just as long as possible. Go out lights, decrease excess tone, act calm and present your furry friend cat space. This is a great idea to prevent touching the feline as long like you can. Pet felines in seizures can be intense, or you can easily damage them inadvertently. In case you have to move them (such as to help the veterinarians), cover these questions towel and keep them all safe. If your cat has had a good seizure in the past, has an tv show lasting a great deal more than 5 minutes, or perhaps the attack is severe, please call your veterinarian as well as request emergency care-- they may ask you to deliver your feline in right away. If your feline quits seizure in the particular car, continue to keep your vets so they can examine they are alright. Crisis take care of seizures at the particular vets include drugs to lower mind pastime, air conditioning your pet cat, liquids cure, oxygen, surveillance regarding blood parameters, as fine as medical care. That is essential that vets try and quit typically the seizure task immediately and even then take care of post-seizure concerns. This treatment may require the pet cat to vacation with the veterinarian's for some time. Realize that by doing this not necessarily always favorable to get extreme seizures. How We all Discover Seizures Examining why your canine friend cat has seizures may be complicated as there are lots of potential causes. We normally start by inquiring about your dog cat's background-- we are going to like to understand the place of their seizure task, any kind of behaviour adjustments, your cat's touring as well as contamination background if they have got experienced any sort of ease of access to help toxic chemicals, their diet plan plan, and so to fruition. Medical evaluation of your own pet pet cat can aid rule out noticeable underlying causes of seizures. This particular may include the nerve exam, our blood screening for you to dismiss metabolic reasons, sampling cerebrospinal water to look for indicators of sores, or imaging such like ultrasound, x-rays, COMPUTERTOMOGRAFIE, or perhaps MRI. If we trust your pet kitty offers an illness that can make seizures, such while liver or perhaps kidney condition, we may accomplish pee or fecal tests as well as take these body organs' biopsies. Idiopathic epilepsy can be more difficult to diagnose, and there is a couple of real adjustments; medical diagnosis will be commonly just probable after we have dismissed all some other reasons. Avoiding potential seizures will undoubtedly count on a certain cause. Quite a few age-related ailments in canine cats are usually taken treatment of with their quite own individual therapy strategies-- successful cure ought in order to stop seizure tasks. Cancer tumor cells triggering seizures may be able be got rid of surgically or even along with radiation treatment. Many medicines are available of which protect against episodes; phenobarbital is the cheapest and the most typical, although less nicely endured by cats in comparison with canines; however, various various other choices consist of imepitoin, levetiracetam, and gabapentin. This can originally be challenging to determine the ideal medication dosage for specific family pet cats and kittens, so treatment method typically depends on demo and problem. Many drugs will call for to be given by mouth on the very a minimum of after a day, which consists of a lot of input from you. Moreover, typically the drug treatments do have the lot of side-effects that will require to be treated. All of this information will unquestionably be given for you by simply your vet if they will experience your cat demands long-term anti-seizure medication. Final Thoughts Seizures can transpire in cats, and furthermore, although they are rare, you currently know precisely what generates them, exactly precisely how you can distinguish together with take care of a seizure feline, and precisely how vets will favorably spot and treat them all. One of the essential factors for you like a proprietor to do is to help be in the watch for the unusual task of which might suggest your cat is seizure-- the bulk of these kind of weird signs will be harmless. Having said that, it is great to identify them just in a good situation. Funds afraid of seizures-- be prepared, so that you know the very very best way to support your feline.
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ownerlove12 · 2 years
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Hard working liver Infarction along with Venous Thromboembolism after Romidepsin Use within the ADPKD Affected individual with Encapsulating Peritoneal Sclerosis: In a situation Document
Your platelet-specific receptor glycoprotein Ib leader (GPIb leader) encourages the two platelet adhesion and also inflamed actions of platelets as well as targeting of GPIb alpha attenuated EAE inside rats. In addition, concentrating on yet another platelet adhesion receptor, glycoprotein IIb/IIIa (GPIIb/IIIa), additionally diminished EAE seriousness within these animals. Conclusions: Platelets help with the actual pathogenesis associated with EAE by promoting CNS inflammation. Aimed towards platelets may possibly therefore symbolize a crucial brand-new healing approach for#keep##links# Milliseconds treatment method. (Circ Res. 2012;A hundred and ten:1202-1210.)Purpose. Throughout neocortical epilepsies not necessarily satisfactorily tuned in to systemic antiepileptic medicine treatment, local using antiepileptic agents onto the epileptic target may possibly boost treatment efficacy along with tolerability. All of us illustrate the consequences of focally applied valproate (VPA) in a recently emerging rat label of neocortical epilepsy brought on by tetanus toxic (TeT) as well as cobalt chloride (CoCl2). Methods. Throughout subjects, VPA (and = A few) as well as sodium chloride (NaCl) (d Equates to 5) made up of polycaprolactone (PCL) enhancements were employed to the proper electric motor cortex dealt with just before using a three-way injection of 70 ng TeT plus 15mg CoCl2. Video-EEG overseeing ended up being executed using intracortical depth electrodes. Benefits. All rodents randomized towards the NaCl party died inside of 1 week after surgical treatment. On the other hand, the rodents addressed with nearby VPA made it through considerably lengthier (P < Zero.02). In organizations, experienced deaths took place your context of seizures. A minimum of 3/4 of the test subjects living through the 1st postoperative morning developed neocortical epilepsy together with frequent quickly arranged convulsions. Findings. The actual story TeT/CoCl2 tactic targets at the fresh label of neocortical epilepsy inside rats along with allows the investigation regarding neighborhood epilepsy remedy strategies. Within this vehicle-controlled study, neighborhood application of VPA drastically improved success within subjects, perhaps through major antiepileptic as well as antiepileptogenic systems.History: Dialysate calcium supplements (Ca) awareness ought to be considered as part of the incorporated restorative strategy to regulate renal osteodystrophy and keep typical spring metabolic rate. Hence, the correct alkaline calcium supplement mass harmony (Ca++MB) through hemodialysis (Hi-def) is vital within the management of renal osteodystrophy. The Master single-pass set dialysis program (Fresenius Medical Care, Belgium) consists of a shut down dialysate tank involving Ninety days M; it gives you the opportunity of results size bills of the solute in an exceedingly specific method. Methods: The current review has a crossover layout: 11 stable anuric High definition individuals#keep##links# underwent#keep##links# A couple of bicarbonate Hi-def sessions, One particular of four years old a long time (4h) and the other associated with Eight hours (8h) inside a arbitrary string, constantly with the very same interdialytic period, at the very least A week separate. The particular Wizard system along with high-flux FX80 dialyzers (Fresenius Health care, Philippines) were utilized. The volume of bloodstream and dialysate refined, number of ultrafiltration along with dialysate Los angeles levels (1.
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saberstars · 3 years
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I'm Here
Pairing: Gender Neutral Y/N & Loki
Fluff, angst, implied smut
Warnings: Mentions of depression/mental illness, epilepsy/seizures, mentions of sex, as always if I missed anything feel free to let me know
Summary: Loki & You have a pre-existing friendship with benefits & one night you have a seizure after some spiciness. He cares for you helping you afterwards & makes sure you rest easy & safe. Reader is portrayed to have seizures more so during changes in sleep phases, not awake. The wake seizures or more of a medium ish absence/ focal aware seizure that only occur on occasion & can be “fought” through.
Word Count: 1796
Notes: This was intended to be a gender neutral reader. I think I removed all he/she pronouns.
Additionally, I know that not everyone experiences seizures the same way, and that epilepsy can affect people differently. This is all written from my experiences with it, so I ask that you do not tell me I portrayed something wrong. I can and will accept constructive criticism, But I will not accept someone telling me blatantly that I am wrong with my experiences. Therefore please keep that in mind when reading. I genuinely hope this fic brings others comfort if you suffer from epilepsy or any disorder that causes seizures. Thank You <3
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It’s been three years since you found out you suffered from epilepsy. A diagnosis that came late in your life to be fair. As a young child up until you reached adulthood, you suffered from eye shakes that would eventually turn into stuttering spells that made it difficult to breath or not breath properly at all. You never passed out though, you got close a few times, but you managed to stay awake and “fight it off.” You started to notice over time that you’d also get a strange taste in your mouth, almost like metal or as if you were sucking on a battery and it had that zing flavor. You knew that was a precursor and would panic on cue rightfully so. You hated when you had your mini stutter fests because all you could do was hope it didn’t happen.
Of course you complained to your parents as a child but they didn’t think it was anything. They said it was just a panic attack. So you took their word for it. That was until you started having grand mals in your sleep. At first you thought they were just a part of some strange dream, that wasn't real to you, not yet anyway. You would wake up exhausted, sore, sometimes unable to move properly, walk, open and close a fist, and you just overall couldn't stay conscious sometimes. Again you complained to your parents about it, but they said it was nothing. You probably had night terrors or some form of minor sleep paralysis. So you dumbly believed them.
When you moved out, You sought answers, and eventually got them. You were grateful. The medication they prescribed helped tremendously though, it did make you tired but it was worth not having your episodes. Thankfully your case wasn’t as severe as others and it was manageable so long as you took care of yourself and took your medications. Though you were warned, breakthroughs were common, and missing your dose can and would cause a seizure.
Despite having such a diagnosis, you kept it to yourself. You never really told anyone. It wasn’t until you started sleeping with a friend, that you finally divulged your secret too in the event that it ever happened whilst they were with you.
It was someone you randomly slept with on and off with. A friend with benefits, his name was Loki. You had met the god shortly after his father had passed and his home, destroyed. You found comfort with each other despite it being more of a sexual comfort. You both used sex as a way to fight your own demons, a distraction, a quick grab at serotonin. Despite the sex you both developed a very deep friendship. You’d read together on occasion, have very interesting debates on current events, history, as well as other nuances, and a lot of other things. You even met his brother and the avengers at one point.
You both slept soundly after spicy events had taken place 2 hours prior, Loki had come over desperate for attention of any kind. He didn’t say why, but you knew it was a rather serious topic he wished not to discuss and rather lessen the pain with ecstasy. Little did you know, on this day a few years ago he indirectly murdered his mother. He blamed himself dearly, he knew if he would have kept his mouth shut for once in his life she may be here today. So he needed a genuine distraction. One of any kind. Preferable you. Due to the spicy events that took place you missed your dose, due to falling asleep promptly after, which cost you dearly. Missing doses always caused this to happen no matter what.
You gasped for air like usual, your body contorting outwards first with a thrust. You were awake, conscious, and terrified for the few seconds you normally were given before blacking out. You began to stutter violently all the air leaving your lungs as it happened. Until no sounds were made and it was just you chattering. Loki woke immediately, with a completely calm exterior despite a raging mixture of emotions internally. He knew you never called an ambulance for these things because you were normally alone & unaware until you became conscious again. She made him promise to never call 911 unless it was over a certain time length, to save her medical expenses, or unless she stopped breathing for good.
Loki dare not touch you though as you shook and curled up. The last thing he wanted was his godly strength to crush you somehow or cause you more pain. Instead he watched and hovered until you finally stopped. It was a short 50 second one, which was under your time limit, but he still debated calling. It’s not like You would’ve known he lied.
His breathing hitched as he went to check your pulse and airway, ever so delicately, which were both clear and strong.
“Oh thank you.” he whispered
A few hours had slid by with still no response from you. Loki sat next to you, staring down at you, to the point where he would fight the urge to blink, waiting for a stir of some kind from you. He did give the courtesy of redressing you though, in a nightgown from a drawer after an hour slid past. He even went as far as ensuring that you were adequately covered by the blankets to avoid being chilled. It has been 3 ½ hours now, with no stir of any kind from you. He knew it would be awhile before you showed any signs of movement possibly but this worry tore him to his core. In the midst of waiting he refused to just idly go back to sleep next to you, he was determined to stay awake until you were conscious again, so that you knew, he stayed there waiting for you. Loki didn’t know when he found himself talking to you as if you were awake, but all he knew was that it made him feel a bit better, and he hoped that when you woke it would make you feel better too.
“You know, I’ve been reading this really dumb gothic romance novel. I think you’d like it because of how naive the girl is. I know you like to criticize and pick on how they make decisions.” he spoke with a chuckle in his voice thinking back to how you’d flail your arms and drop your book to scream about how dumb some main protagnist could be.
“I'll have to buy you a copy or give you mine when I’m done.” Loki shifted his weight from his right to his left brushing your bangs out of your eyes.
“I don’t know why you keep those so long, all they do is get in the way of your gorgeous eyes.”
It was in that moment you rustled, you shifted your neck ever so slightly, Your eyelids twitch. Loki leaned forward parting his lips as he watched with a heart of hope completely overwhelmed with joy when he saw the color of your iris’s. He exhaled a shaky breath cupping your cheeks which caused you to flinch sending a wave of shocks through your body. It was at that moment you knew. You knew what he saw, what he had gone through. Your heart sank and you immediately berated yourself internally despite your exhausted state.
“It’s ok you don’t have to say or do anything. I’ll stay, I’ll take care of you for as long as you need.” Loki assured you, wanting you to know that you didn’t have to go through this alone. You never really had anyone stay, let alone worry about you. Your eyes began to water as tears rolled down your face.
“I’ll go grab you some water, you’re probably parched. I’ll also grab you a banana. I read that potassium can help with the cramping.” Loki said leaving to yourself for a moment. He also grabbed tissues for your eyes and nose just in case. Upon returning her placed everything at your side offering help to sit up. “Do you need to use the bathroom or help sitting up?” He asked with a gentle tone.
You nodded trying to take a good deep breath so you could speak a bit. “I’m so sorry you had to see that… but thank you. Thank you for staying, for helping. I do need the bathroom and I would appreciate help. My legs are still...” you mustered out with all your might but after a point your tongue refused to work with you.
“Of course, I may be a monster but I’m not entirely cruel. If it helps… you can just think to yourself and I can listen that way. So that you're not struggling too much.” Loki admitted with a tone of self depreciation.
“You're not a monster just because you're different & have made mistakes.” you thought as Loki picked you up bridal style walking you to the bathroom. Of course he placed you down on the toilet and waited outside for you to do what you needed. Since he had only added a nightgown to your previously naked body it made things easier. It was exhausting to just sit up and do everything but you pushed through. You even pushed yourself up and limped to the sink best you could to wash your hands. Upon hearing the faucet though Loki came back in standing behind you offering support if needed.
“Catch me~” you thought before falling back into his arms with a snort.
“You're lucky I have godlike reflexes you minx.” He replied with a hint of flirtation. You had used more than you had in you to wash your hand. Loki caught you obviously and carried you back to the room placing you back on the bed. “No, more like I knew you were ready to catch me.” you slowly thought as exhaustion tugged at your consciousness again. Loki noticed the pill bottle on your dresser before prompting you to take it. Instinctively opening it and sliding one into his hand.
“You should probably take this before you fall asleep.” You took it mentally saying thanks drinking the glass of water with it.
“Yeah that would probably help avoid some added breakdancing.” You joked trying to use humor to lighten the situation. Loki stared plain faced trying not to entertain your joke though, despite finding it secretly witty. Maybe he’d laugh at it when you felt a bit better. Soon after you began to dance between awake and sleep. Loki took note based on how your thoughts jumbled around between multiple things, laughing to himself a bit before minor intrusive fears began picking at you. Loki immediately jumped into action in an attempt to squash them soothing you a bit.
“You can sleep soundly, please get some rest. You don’t have to force yourself to stay awake out of fear or guilt.” Loki spoke in the most caring and sweet tone he could muster up. Trying to convince you that it was going to be ok & it worked. Somehow you knew he was right & that you could trust him completely. You drifted back to sleep peacefully thinking about how for the first time in your life, you didn’t fear sleeping in your bed. You didn’t have intrusive thoughts about whether or not you’d wake up in the morning or not. Which honestly brought tears bubbling their way up and out of Loki's eyes. The amount of trust you had in him in your thoughts, at that moment completely took his breath away. And that was something he wasn’t going to break or ever lose.
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bluemoonstonesy · 2 years
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big fat rant because idk what to do anymore
it’s this epilepsy shite i can’t be arsed with too. i used to not let it bother me and just get on with it like it was just a minor inconvenience. but recently in the past few months, it’s just been bothering me in a way that it hasn’t since i was first diagnosed.
i don’t know how to describe a seizure because it’s so so hard to put into words. the only way i can describe the type i have (focal aware) is really really intense deja vu and then into a feeling similar to an intense panic attack. you know what’s happening but your body is frozen and you can kinda feel it rippling in your head. it’s weird as fuck
it’s not just the seizures themselves. it’s the constant panicking that you’re going to have one at any moment. it’s the not being able to walk down certain roads / go to certain places because you had a seizure there and you’ll always associate it with that feeling of panic.
it’s so shit because it’s in your own mind and nobody is fully able to get it. it’s so fucking isolating to know that it’s not in the physical world and it’s just your brain and you should be able to do things that you’d normally take for granted without actually being hurt but you just can’t.
the episodes are possibly the worst thing i’ve ever been through and i wouldn’t wish it upon anyone. 39 seizures in 4 days and i stayed up all that time because i was scared of having a bad one in my sleep and fucking choking. the psychosis aspect is even worse. my room was my safe space yet for whatever reason, i could not step a foot in there because i genuinely thought something was trying to harm me in some way. looking back, it’s pretty obvious that there wasn’t but at the time it was terrifying and i seriously didn’t know what to do.
long story short, i’m mentally exhausted and need brain surgery because this bullshit :)
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informationsorter · 2 years
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Different types of seizures, and what to do if someone is having a seizure.
Signs that a seizure is a medical emergency:
- The seizure lasts longer than 5 minutes. - The person has more than one seizure within 5 minutes of the last seizure. - The person has difficulty breathing or regaining/staying conscious after the seizure. - The person is hurt during the seizure. - The seizure happened in water (risk of water in the lungs). - The person is pregnant, or has a condition such as heart disease or diabetes.
What to do if someone starts having a seizure:
- Try to protect their head if they fall (but do not try to restrain them or keep them upright). - Make sure they are in a safe location (ie not in the middle of the road). - Give them space, keep everyone back and try to calm down any bystanders who may start to panic. - Cushion their head but do not restrict it. - Clear away any dangerous objects (such as glass, furniture, sharp rocks). - If possible, loosen anything the person may have around their neck which could make breathing difficult (such as a tie, choker style necklace, etc), as well as items such as eyeglasses.
- Time the length of the seizure if possible, and stay with them until the seizure ends and they are fully awake. - Call an ambulance if you believe the seizure is a medical emergency (as outlined above). - Do not try to restrain them. - Do not try to stop their movements. - Do not place anything inside their mouth (putting something soft in their mouth is an outdated idea which causes more harm than good).
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention states that you should NOT do the following:
- Do not hold the person down or try to stop their movements. - Do not put anything in the person's mouth. - Do not try to perform CPR (or mouth-to-mouth breaths). - Do not try to make the person consume food or water until they are fully awake and alert.
For information about the different types of seizures, please keep reading.
Absence Seizures. 
An absence seizure begins and ends abruptly and without warning. It consists of a period of unconsciousness with a blank stare. It may look like the person is daydreaming.
The person may lose muscle control and make repetitive movements such as:
- Chewing movements
- Rapid breathing
- Rhythmic blinking
- Slight movements or tugging at clothing
Absence seizures are brief, usually lasting only two to 10 seconds. There is no confusion after the seizure, and the person can usually resume full activity immediately.
There is no need for medical or emergency assistance. Stay calm, and make sure the person is not in immediate danger (such as being in the middle of the road).
Tonic-clonic seizure / "grand mal".
Loss of consciousness, falls to the ground, shakes.
This is the type most commonly represented in media, and the type that most people think of when they hear "seizure".
Clonic seizure.
Shakes, may lose consciousness, may fall to the ground.
Tonic seizure.
Tonic seizures are characterized by facial and truncal muscle spasms, flexion or extension of the upper and lower extremities, and impaired consciousness.
May not have shaking.
Focal (or Partial) Seizures.
If a seizure begins in a brain region that is responsible for processing visual information, a person could have a temporary disturbance in their vision. If a seizure begins in a brain region that is responsible for movement, a person could have a temporary uncontrollable twitching of one or more body parts. If a seizure begins in a brain region that is responsible for feelings, a person could have a change in their emotions such as a sudden onset of fear.
The most common forms of focal seizures are: - Focal seizure with retained awareness (sometimes referred to as an aura) - Focal seizure with loss of awareness (or focal dyscognitive)
The seizure may remain in the one focal point, or move around/spread.
Focal Seizures with Retained Awareness.
During the seizure the person will be able to communicate and will remember the episode afterwards.
Some people have full awareness at the very beginning and then their seizure evolves, or spreads, and can result in a Focal Dyscognitive Seizure, or a generalized Tonic-Clonic Seizure.
Sub categories: 1. Autonomic Seizures - Physical signs eg nausea, bile, flatulence, stomach pain, pallor, hair standing on end, flushing, sweating, dilation of pupils, heart rate/respiration, etc. (Not all at once)
2. Emotional and Other - One may see or hear things that are not there. One feels emotions, often fear, but sometimes sadness, anger, or joy. There may be a bad smell or a bad taste, a funny feeling in the pit of the stomach or a choking sensation.
3. Motor - Jerking/convulsive.
4. Sensory seizures - The person may see lights, hear a buzzing sound, or feel tingling or numbness in a part of the body.
Focal Dyscognitive Seizures. 
Formerly called complex partial seizures or psychomotor seizures. No convulsions/shaking. Does not impair awareness or consciousness.
Atonic (Drop) Seizures.
Atonic seizures (drop attacks) are not seen in many children. Without warning, a child abruptly loses consciousness, collapses and falls to the floor. There is no convulsion, but children may hit their heads as they fall. After a few seconds, the child regains consciousness and can stand and walk again.
Atonic seizures may occur with Lennox-Gastaut Syndrome. They sometimes resist anticonvulsant medication. If so, the child may have to wear a helmet to prevent head injuries.
Myoclonic Seizures.
Myoclonic seizures occur in several different types of childhood epilepsy. They involve abrupt muscle jerks in parts or all of the body. A hand may suddenly fling out, a shoulder may shrug, a foot may kick, or the entire body may jerk.
Myoclonic seizures can occur as a single event or in series. Consciousness and memory are not impaired. A myoclonic seizure may cause a child to spill or drop what s/he is holding, or to fall from his/her chair.
Myoclonic seizures should not be confused with tics or “startle” responses.
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wtfcl0ud · 6 months
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this cld be such a funny story tho. have no motivation in anything during secondary -> form 5 french teacher says you're good at french realized you actually are n you like it -> decide to pursure french at the tertiary level -> french literature is a requirement -> gets assigned le voyeur by robbe-grillet -> is intrigued by the possible underlying psychological themes in the work particularly the idea the protag has a "double personality" particularly bc of the link of dissociation which makes the protag seem somewhat relatable n understandable -> decides to use that as the theme for the mandatory presentation -> comes across critic suggesting protag has psychomotor epilepsy which is today known as temporal lobe epilepsy -> has nvr heard of this b4 does a lot of research to try to understand better mainly with the goal of suggesting said critic made an incorrect diagnosis -> has a huh those symptoms sound 'relatable' who knew epilepsy cld be 'so simple' -> has a familiar inexplicable episode that night -> gets frustrated and tries searching possible causes for the gazillionth time -> comes across seizures as a possible cause -> bc of the limited new understanding of what seizures can entail doesn't shrug it off as a possibility -> does more research -> realizes i have focal onset aware seizures
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fuckepilepsy · 2 years
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Hello! I don’t mind if you answer this publicly or not, I just didn’t know how to ask other than this.
So recently I’ve been experiencing this smell hallucination thing where at random times I’ll smell peanut butter or something so strong it’ll make me gag, and when I told my neurologist they said it could relate to seizures??
I haven’t really been able to get a clear answer on this from anyone, even the teams of doctors I had in the hospital, so I figured maybe you would know how the heck seizures and olfactory hallucinations correlate.
If not, that’s totally okay, I understand. Thank you!!
Extraordinary sensory anomalies, including olfactory hallucinations, can be the result of focal onset aware seizures. I'm not saying that this is the case for you (I am not qualified to make any kind of diagnosis), but it is a possibility. The nature of the sensation depends on what region of the brain at which the seizure occurs. I've never heard of the scent of peanut butter, specifically, but focal onset aware seizures can certainly be the culprit.
However, consider that olfactory hallucinations can have other causes. They can result from the use of some types of drugs, or from a psychiatric illness. Hell, a lot of things that fuck with the brain can produce bizarre sensory experiences. For an individual with an established diagnosis of epilepsy, I think focal onset aware seizures would be the most likely reason, but it's not the only possibility, which is probably why your neuro wouldn't give you a clear answer.
Speaking of whom, I'm not really surprised that your neuro would just kinda shrug it off, because I'm pretty sure that a definitive diagnosis tying your olfactory hallucinations to a seizure would require an MRI, which would identify which region of your brain is experiencing abnormal activity during a peanut butter olfactory event (good band name, there). My guess is that your health care team may not want to pull out the big guns (specifically, a huge-ass magnet spinning around the TUBE OF MADNESS that costs a bajillion dollars to acquire and operate) to address a problem that they do not perceive to be an acute danger to your well-being.
However, the ideal type and quantity of seizures for an epileptic to experience is zero. IF your olfactory hallucinations are in fact the result of seizures--and I'm not qualified to make that call--it means your treatment plan isn't sufficient to prevent them, which is very uncool. Regardless of how disruptive they are to you, preventing them should be on your health care team's to-do list.
I'll publish this ask in case anyone who has olfactory hallucinations stemming from focals has any first-hand experience to share.
@bandshirts-and-books
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celosiaa · 4 years
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hi me again 🥺 sorry for making you tear up even if it was in a good way (hopefully?) 💕 i don’t mind the wait at all, i completely understand and it’s 100% worth it (honestly i get so excited whenever you post a new fic)!! soooo... i was doing some research for a project on epilepsy and i got thinking about epileptic martin?? like particular in s1 maybe he didn’t tell the other archives crew as he didn’t know them that well/hadn’t worked closely with them before (ok sorry tbc as i am rambling)
hello friend!!! I am so sorry that this took me a literally unreasonable amount of time to write! I really enjoyed the research I did for this, and I love this hc forever. And I hope this is what you were looking for <3
CW seizures, nausea, misgendering
Focus.
Just focus.
For god’s sake.
It’s been nearly an hour of Martin sitting at his desk, trying desperately to rein in any sliver of concentration he can muster to look at the laptop screen before him. He feels awful doing it, but every time Jon has passed by his desk that day, he’s found himself pretending to click around or to type—though he’s got the brightness set so far down there’s no way he’d be able to see it anyway. After a few attempts at turning it back up, he’s had to immediately look away, as the pounding behind his eyes resumes again. So for now, he’s stuck with reading statements—something he is loathe to do even on a good day.
And this certainly wasn’t.
He knows better than this, knows that he’s very nearly approaching disaster—what with the not sleeping out of hypervigilance, not eating out of anxiety, and not having his seizure meds for the past two days, as he’d managed to run out of his flat without them. And there’s no doubt in his mind that he cannot send anyone back to his flat. Not with Prentiss still on the loose.
Selfish selfish selfish
No, stop it.
You haven’t even done anything.
Wishing more than anything that his mind did not constantly run him ragged with thoughts like this, Martin looks up from his papers, intending to find a rubber band to snap against his wrist as a distraction, but instead—
Instead he finds himself frozen, colors fading in and out across his vision, heartbeat steadily climbing as his fingers go numb.
No no no no
Not now not now please not now
Realistically, he knows it’s only been a few seconds, but the seconds feel like years against the rapid thrum thrum thrum in his ears, made even worse when he sees Tim approaching from the periphery.
Damn it damn it
Please please please
“Hey Marto!”
Like clockwork, the focal aware seizure ends, and at last—at last he is able to move enough to look up at where Tim stands, leaning against his desk, smile fading rapidly as he watches Martin blinking in the suddenly-too-bright light.
“You alright?” he asks, tilting his head to the side to get a better look at his face, doubtless taking note of how quickly he is breathing now to match his settling heart rate.
“Y-yeah, sorry, um. Was just thinking,” is all he can reply, fighting to put an easy smile back on his face.
It seems to have been the wrong move, as Tim only shifts to sit atop his desk, expression quickly becoming overrun with concern.
“Okay, well…you look like you’re having a panic attack, mate,” he says lowly, reaching across him to grab his water bottle and set it nearer to him. “What do you need?”
Even with his misguided interpretation, Martin can’t help the flood of affection he feels toward him in this moment—because that’s just Tim, isn’t it? Never assumes, just asks what will help and then does it.
If only I weren’t such a mess, and would let him.
“Oh, n-no it’s not—it’s not that, Tim, I’m—I’m alright. Must’ve…drifted off, or something. Had a nightmare.”
There is no way Tim buys that, no way in hell—but thankfully, he lets it go.
“O…kay then. Well. If that’s the case, I was just thinking of grabbing some lunch, do you want anything? Don’t reckon you’ve eaten properly in a bit, yeah?”
God, Tim.
I don’t deserve this.
Yes, you do. You deserve a friend and you need to eat.
You need to eat.
“Uhh—th-thanks, erm.  Where—where are you going?” he asks, wishing to god his voice didn’t sound so shaky.
He takes a few intentionally deep breaths after that—thinking that perhaps it is a panic attack, after all.  Without realizing that several seconds have gone by since his question, he feels Tim’s bracing hand on his shoulder, knowing that he’s not going to ask again—but offering him a clear sign that he’s there all the same.
“Just the corner shop,” he murmurs, starting to rub his thumb over the shoulder seam of Martin’s t-shirt. “Nothing fancy. But I can get you a sandwich, if you like. Well, no—I am getting you a sandwich regardless, but I thought I might be considerate for once and ask if there was anything in particular that you want.”
“Yeah—erm, yeah, just. Anything that’s warm would be nice,” he says at last, sinking a bit as Tim removes his hand from his shoulder. “Thanks, Tim. That’s—that’s really kind.”
“Don’t mention it. Seriously,” he says, clapping his hand back against Martin’s shoulder with force before standing. “Be back in a bit. Drink that water.”
“I will,” Martin nods, earning himself some finger guns of approval before Tim starts walking towards the lift. “Thanks, mate.”
And he’s so close now, so close to shouting after him, to asking him to pick up his meds from the chemist, if he calls them in—
Just ask just ask just ask
—and then Tim is around the corner, and out of sight.
Damn it all.
He tells himself it’s probably for the best anyway—that he’s not really even sure he can get them. But it doesn’t stop him burying his face in his hands, tugging at his hair in frustration and shame. Really though, he ought to call first before mentioning anything—perhaps they have a delivery service, or they’ll refuse him, or something.
And what then?
The idea of finding himself suddenly on the floor of the archives, alone and in the dark with the worms having crawled all over him while he seized—
Have to call.
Reaching bitterly for his phone, he takes a deep breath as it rings, preparing his best “customer service” voice.
“Boots, how can we help you today?”
“Hi! Erm, I was wondering if—if I could get a refill for my prescription? For—for carbamazepine,” he says, cheery voice belying the dread with which he pinches the bridge of his nose.
“Sure thing! Just need your name and date of birth and I’ll look you up.”
“Right. Erm—well, it’s Martin, but I think you’ve still got me under, erm. Mary Blackwood,” he says, forcing himself not to grit his teeth at the foul taste his deadname leaves in his mouth. “Date of birth October 15th, 1987.”
“Alright, let’s see here—“
Please please please
“—it looks like you’ve already got your refill, Miss Blackwood. Our system says you picked up your medication on the 19th.”
“It’s—it’s Mister, actually. Erm,” he stammers, stomach churning over the entire thing. “L-listen, I—I’ve had to leave my home quite suddenly, and—and I am unable to return there for the time being. So I don’t—I don’t have access to my meds. And I, erm. Really need them.”
Pathetic pathetic pathetic
“I’m really sorry, Mister Blackwood. You’re going to have your doctor call in another prescription for you before we can get you that refill. Unfortunately, it’s out of our hands.”
Of course.
“Oh, right. That’s erm—that’s okay. Thank you so much,” he says as brightly as possible, unwilling to blame anyone for something out of their control.
“You’re quite welcome. Take care.”
With a long, shaky sigh, Martin throws his phone back onto his desk, returning his head to its rightful place, buried in his hands. There’s no way he can call his doctor today—or tomorrow even, with it already being a Friday afternoon. No chance of him getting his refill, then. And no chance of sending Tim back to his apartment either.
Don’t panic. Don’t panic.
It was just a focal, nothing too bad.
Nothing unmanageable.
I can make it.
Steeling himself with somewhat tremulous determination, he takes another long breath—blinking back against the steady pounding in his head, and getting back to work.
“Aw come on, Sasha! Take a break with me!”
“Not on your life. I’m still furious with you, you know,” she replies, tossing her hair like a lion’s mane over her back. “Can’t believe you’d go all the way to the good café for Martin, and not offer me anything. Not even crumbs, Stoker!”
“Listen—” Tim grins back, hands raised in self-defense. “He looked like he could use some soup! I don’t know what else to say.”
“And you didn’t get me any? What about me doesn’t scream ‘I could use some soup, thank you?’”
“It’s different!! It’s—Martin? You alright?”
As he was walking past their bickering, eyes firmly fixed on the floor on the lookout for worms, Martin had suddenly stopped short—looking anxiously up and over their heads, framed by the doorway of Jon’s office.
“Martin?” Tim repeats, already halfway to standing in worry, following Martin’s gaze behind him and finding nothing.
Faster than he can turn back around, Martin’s muscles all tense at once—and he tips backwards onto the floor with a heavy thud.
“Shit! Martin!”
Tim darts forward at once, in some feeble attempt to catch him, but of course, far too late to do so. In his shock, he can do little but stand over him for a few seconds, taken aback upon seeing his eyes still open where he lies still on the floor.
“What happened?” Jon demands, stepping quickly out of his office towards them, where Sasha now crouches near his head.
“I-I don’t know, he just—”
And then Martin begins to convulse.
“Oh my god, he’s—he’s having a seizure,” Sasha gasps as she claps a hand over her mouth, from where it had been pressed against his forehead.
“Fuck. Fuck, what do—what do we do? Do we call 999?” Tim shouts, unwilling to sit by and watch as this all goes on around him, already grabbing Sasha’s phone from her nearby desk.
“I—I think so, let me—”
“Wait.”
Two sets of eyes land upon Jon as he interjects, crouching near Martin’s flailing left arm, waiting for him to set it back down before quickly grabbing at a bracelet circling his wrist.
“I-it’s a medical bracelet. Says epilepsy,” he says lowly, quickly sitting back on his heels as Martin’s arm begins to jerk again.
“Fuck. I—I had no idea,” Tim breathes, running an anxious hand through his hair. “How could we not know?”
“We should—” Sasha breaks off quickly to swallow a lump in her throat, before continuing. “We should be timing it, did anyone see the time?”
“I-I don’t—it’s probably been less than a minute, right?”
“I think so. I’m—here, I’m googling it to make sure—”
While she does so, Martin’s head begins to slam into the ground—and Jon immediately pulls off his cardigan, folding it quickly and placing it beneath him to cushion the blow.
“It’s alright, big guy,” Tim says, settling down to kneel next to Jon, who now has a hand gently pressed to his shoulder—not holding him down, just resting there in a comfort Martin probably cannot receive.
Tim rests his own hand against Martin’s thigh all the same.
“Okay, I think we’re good so far,” Sasha says at last, setting her phone down with a timer running on the screen. “Just time it, and—and keep watch. If it goes past five minutes, we call 999.”
“That’s—that’s it?” Tim says in dismay, snapping his eyes back to his friend, still convulsing on the floor. “There’s nothing else we can do?”
“No. We just have to watch out for him,” she replies, voice low as she adjusts Jon’s cardigan beneath his head. “Make sure he doesn’t hurt himself.”
Not the answer that Tim was looking for.
And so they wait—silent save for the rhythmic smacking of his limbs against the carpeted floor, and the occasional whispered platitude, though all know he cannot hear them. The seconds tick by in agony while they sit helpless, all eyeing the timer on Sasha’s phone creeping up steadily past three minutes.
“I don’t like this,” Tim says, knowing how useless it is to say so—Sasha raising her eyes to meet his for the first time in a while.
“Me neither.”
“Nearly three and a half minutes,” Jon mutters, worrying at his bottom lip while still resting a gentle hand on Martin’s shoulder.
“We’ve got you, Martin,” Tim mutters. “We’ve got you.”
Ten more seconds.
Twenty.
Thirty.
Forty.
And at last—at last he goes still, right past the four-minute mark.
“Alhamdulillah,” Jon sighs as he lets his chin briefly rest against his chest, a sentiment echoed by everyone around him.
“Okay, turn him on his side, here—Tim—”
“Got it,” Tim says as he moves to crouch next to her, helping roll him towards Jon, head pillowed on the arm Jon stretched out across the floor as a cushion.
As soon as they get him in the recovery position, they watch as saliva runs out of his mouth, surely fit to choke him had they not turned him—and he begins to snore forcefully, catching Tim very much by surprise.
“Wh-what—” he asks in bewilderment, struggling to hold back a bit of shocked laughter.
“The website said that’s normal,” Sasha assures at once, reaching behind her to grab a box of tissues from her desk behind her. “He’s going to be sleepy for a bit.”
“Okay. That’s—okay,” he says, watching as Jon takes the tissues from Sasha and wipes at Martin’s face so very gently, before tossing them aside and taking his hand.
Taking his hand.
…interesting.
Stowing THAT away for later.
As Jon starts to move his thumb across the back of Martin’s palm, the snoring stops—and his eyes begin to flutter rapidly, attempting to force their way fully open.
“Hey Martin, can you hear me?” Sasha says rather loudly, bending over him and tapping his shoulder lightly.
All she receives in response is a moan, deep and low, as he squeezes and unsqueezes his eyelids, coughing a bit against the pooling saliva. Jon reaches for the tissues again at once, cleaning his face as best as possible.
“You’re okay mate,” Tim says, patting his hip before leaving his hand there for support. “You’ve had a seizure.”
It takes a few moments, but at last, Martin opens his eyes, looking vaguely around without meeting Jon’s eyes.
“Wh’ happ’n?” he slurs—all three of them exchanging a meaningful glance, a bit alarmed.
“You had a seizure, Martin,” Sasha repeats, stroking at his hair while Tim starts rubbing his hand up and down his arm, hoping it will somehow help to ground him.
Remaining still for a few moments, still blinking, Martin tries to take it all in— looking down towards where Jon still rubs at his hand, though still seemingly unaware of his presence.
“What happened?” he asks again, voice less slurred, but still weak.
“A seizure, Martin,” Jon says, trying desperately to catch his eyes. “You’re alright.”
At once, Martin wrenches his hand away from Jon’s grasp in favor of clapping it over his mouth, muffling a small and desperate gasp behind it.
“Shit. You gonna be sick?” Tim asks, already looking around him for something to grab as Jon once again prepares his tissues.
He does not respond right away, instead pausing for a few deep breaths—at last shaking his head no. In both relief and the absence of something to do with his hands, Jon fusses at the cardigan again—positioning it just so.
“Wh—oh, seizure,” Martin breathes, and Tim cannot help but feel relieved at his gaining a bit of orientation back.
“Yeah.”
Eyebrows knitting together, Martin moves the hand clapped over his mouth to rest on his eyes, sniffling a bit before speaking.
“M’so sorry,” he gasps—and it’s enough to break Tim’s heart.
All of their hearts apparently, as they immediately place their hands on him in a gesture of comfort.
“Hey, no, none of that,” Sasha soothes, brushing back his fringe again.
“M’sorry.”
“Martin, it’s alright,” reassures Jon, with such rare gentleness that even Martin lowers his hand to look—wincing quickly as he does so, and placing it back over his eyes at once.
“Do the lights hurt?” Sasha asks worriedly, placing her hand to cover his own, hoping to block more of it out.
“Yeah—ah,” he grits out with a pained little gasp, and Jon gets to his feet.
“I’ll get them,” he says, and walks quickly to the switch, sending them into a darkness illuminated only by the light from the hall.
With a quiet sigh of relief, Martin lowers his hand again, eyes still closed, and rubs absently at his nose. Stumbling a bit as his eyes adjust to the dark, Jon makes his way back to kneeling beside him, taking up his free hand again.
“Your head okay?” asks Tim, prompting Sasha to card through his hair to look for any swelling. “I’m sorry I didn’t—I couldn’t catch you.”
“…what?” comes the vague response, delayed by a few seconds as Martin tries in vain to sort through what was said.
“Still confused,” Sasha mouths at him silently—and he nods, instead going back to rubbing up and down Martin’s arm, as Sasha moves to massage his neck.
“M’sorry.”
“Hush, darling. It’s alright,” she says, and Tim knows without a doubt she will sit there all day, repeating these same things to him as long as he needs.
And loves her for it.
“…wh—Jon?”
Eyes more focused than ever, Martin looks down to where Jon still rubs a thumb over his palm, stunned very his very presence in this space.
“Yes, I’m here,” he murmurs, offering a small squeeze of affirmation, inadvertently painting a soft grin briefly across Martin’s face—before it drops quickly again in horror, as the reality of the situation sinks in again.
“Oh god. I—oh god.”
“It’s okay, Martin.”
“No no no.”
“It’s alright,” Jon comforts, more soothing than Tim had ever imagined would be possible for him. “Just be still. You’re alright.”
Five minutes turn into ten, turn into fifteen as Martin’s confusion slowly fades away—his recovery naturally filled with a deluge of apologies, patient soothing from his friends, and tending to the waves of nausea that come over him every few minutes. Ever so gradually, he becomes better able to hold a conversation; better able to hold their gaze, asking what happened before he went down, explaining that his…well, everything is sore, but that it’s nothing unmanageable.
There is very little that Martin would call “unmanageable,” of course, but it’s the most they will get out of him.
“I think I can sit up now,” he says after a bit, bracing his arms underneath himself to prepare, and Tim reaches out to support him at once.
“Sure?”
“Yeah.”
A bit slow, a bit clumsy, they get him up—not without some worried questioning when he hunches forward, face buried in his hands as the headache worsens with the change of posture. But luckily, it dulls as quickly as it comes, and Martin soon finds himself able to look up, even to offer a bit of a sheepish smile.
“Want some water?” Tim asks as soon as he looks steady.
“You don’t have to—”
“I’m on it,” he says, refusing to accept any of Martin’s guilt-laden excuses, and dashes off to the kitchen at once, leaving Jon and Sasha still vaguely holding onto him in the fear that he might fall again.
“I’m alright, guys, really,” he assures, though he makes no effort to shrug their hands off—so there they stay.
“Do you know what caused this, Martin?” Sasha asks, folding his collar from where it sticks up at the nape of his neck.
With a heavy sigh and an exhausted pinch to the bridge of his nose, Martin replies, face reddening with shame.
“Yeah. You’re—you’re going to laugh.”
“Why would we laugh?” Jon asks so earnestly, so softly that it wins him a long and surprised look from Martin.
“I…dunno really, just. It’s just that it’s—it’s all my own fault. Stupid.”
“What do you mean?”
“I—I don’t—” he cuts off for a moment to hiss painfully as he rubs at his temple again, and Sasha’s hold tightens ever so slightly as a precaution. “I don’t have my…seizure meds with me. I left them at my flat when—when I ran. From Prentiss.”
Of course.
Of course he did.
“I would have gotten them for you Martin!” Tim shouts as he returns with the water. “Any of us would, mate. You should have said.”
“I didn’t want to send you back to my flat. She might…she might still…be there.”
He fades a bit as he speaks—rubbing once more at his temples, and Sasha resumes her ministrations of massaging his neck.
“Alright, just—it’s alright, Martin,” Jon soothes, a bit alarmed at the way he’s hunched back over—seemingly nauseous again, as he moves the bin a bit closer to himself just in case. “What can we do now?”
After a few long, deep breaths, his churning stomach finally settles long enough for him to answer, albeit a bit more vague-sounding than moments before.
“I tried…I tried to call the chemist, but…they won’t refill it unless I…unless I talk to my doctor. And it’s not like I can just go.”
“You have to get some from A&E then,” Tim insists, sitting back down next to him and pressing a hand atop his shoulder.
“No, I can’t.”
“We’ll go with you,” mutters Jon, before clearing his throat, returning to his best confident-boss tone. “We’ll keep watch for the worms. Go prepared.”
“You don’t—“
“We will,” Sasha says emphatically, leaving no room for argument—and even Martin knows when the battle is lost. “We’re happy to do it, Martin. Seriously.”
“Thank you,” he very nearly whispers, face flushing beet red as the undue attention of the afternoon catches up with him. “That’s really…too kind.”
“Well, you’ve got to get it somehow, mate,” Tim says with a chuckle, earning himself a warning glare from both Sasha and Jon. “What? I’m sure Martin wants this to happen again even less than we do. Which is saying a lot.”
“Yeah,” Martin says, surprising them all by chuckling briefly in return. “Reckon you’re right about that. I didn’t—this is pretty much my worst nightmare, so…just so you all know how sorry I am.”
“Yes, you’ve said,” Sasha laughs. “And it keeps continuing to not be your fault.”
“Right. Sure.”
He does not sound at all sure—but she lets it go all the same.
“We should go today, Martin,” Jon says as he stands, already grabbing a canister of CO2 in preparation. “Don’t want you to miss another dose.”
“And take that thing on the Tube?” Martin laughs, fully smiling for the first time since the whole affair began. “Think we might get some looks.”
“It’s the Tube, mate. Stranger things have happened,” Tim chuckles, rolling his eyes good-naturedly before jumping in to assist him in standing.
“Suppose you’re probably right about that.”
“Let’s go then,” says Jon, face steeled as if armed to the teeth and ready to tangle with anything coming his way. “Work that needs doing.”
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doctorfiction · 5 years
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The protagonist in my speculative fiction novel needs to have a problem that will eventually incapacitate him but starts with very subtle changes that become more apparent over time. I was thinking seizures, but that doesn't seem very subtle. Any ideas?
Actually, seizures are an excellent choice for what you are trying to accomplish. Seizures run the gamut from nearly imperceptible to impossible to ignore.
Let’s start with a definition of the term seizure, progress quickly through the different types, their etiologies (causes) and how they manifest, and finish up with a seizure disorder appropriate to your genre and protagonist.
Simply put, a seizure is an abrupt, abnormal electrical disturbance of the brain resulting in an aberrant motor (muscle) or sensory (thought or sensation) response.
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Seizures can be caused by fever, head trauma, brain bleeding, chemical imbalance, drug/alcohol use, or a space-occupying lesion (a brain tumor or growing mass of any kind). For fiction purposes, we will be concentrating on the space-occupying lesions and how they affect Neurons ( the cells that allow the brain to send and receive information).
Motor neurons: The brain uses these to make muscles move.
Sensory neurons: This is how the brain receives information from the body    and the outside world.
Seizures are classified into two general types: Generalized and Focal (Partial).
**When identifying seizure types, the terms Focal and Partial are interchangeable.**
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Generalized seizures tend to involve all areas of the brain. This category includes a number of subtypes:
Tonic-Clonic: Formerly referred to as a gran mal (French for great evil); this is what most people visualize when they hear the word seizure. The subject is on the ground, unresponsive, arms and legs jerking. The patient may drool or suffer incontinence (loss of bowel/bladder control). The episode lasts from a few seconds to several minutes. The event is dramatic and frightening to bystanders and the subject.
Absence: The subject stares into space as if ignoring you. These seizures last only a few seconds and are more common in the young.
Atonic: Sometimes called “drop-out” seizures, these are characterized by muscle weakness. The subject generally remains alert, but the muscles go weak and they drop what they are holding and may fall to the ground. These also are of short duration. 
There are other subtypes of Generalized seizures, but the focus of our attention in this post is limited in scope and will deal primarily with the subtler and more fiction-worthy Focal variety.
Focal seizures are so named because they occur in a specific region of the brain and produce symptoms (at least initially) limited (focal) to that area.
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The subject may have an altered mental status, but unlike a Generalized seizure, they are usually conscious and often aware and terrified by the manifestations of the seizure. We will explore two types of Focal seizures:
Complex Focal Seizures: These can cause blank stares, lip-smacking, pill rolling movements and laughing, crying, or screaming for no reason. This type of seizure is interesting and does have some obvious uses as a fiction vehicle.
Simple Focal Seizure: These seizures affect how we perceive our surroundings and can cause motor (movement) disorders or changes in mood or emotion. This type is especially well-suited to fiction. The following are a few of the possible symptoms: 
                         Isolated involuntary twitching of fingers
                         Blank stares
                         Hallucinations: seeing, smelling and hearing things that are not there or morphing things that are there into something else. 
                        Déjà vu sensations
                        Sudden mood or emotional changes
                        Dilated pupils
Seconday Generalized Seizure: This is a type of Focal seizure that spreads to the entire brain and can cause gran mal whole-body seizures. It can be because of multiple affected areas.
The inside of the skull is a closed space. When something foreign occupies that space, it exerts pressure on whatever structure is nearby. If the pressure becomes great enough, it will alter the signal passing through the Neurons causing a Focal abnormality. The nature of the abnormality depends on what part of the brain is sending or receiving the signal.
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Now that you have a very basic idea of the nature of Focal (partial) seizures, let’s apply the principles to fiction.
For Example:
A young environmental scientist is taking water samples near an abandoned chemical plant. He is surprised to find tiny tadpole-like organisms swimming in the toxic runoff. The small creatures are whipping their tails and actually break the surface of the water. As he moves closer, there is a marked increase in activity. As he bends down to take a sample, one of the small red- brown creatures lands on his upper lip. Startled, he inhales deeply and feels a burning sensation in his nose. He sneezes, the sensation passes, and he returns to collecting samples. On the ride home, he develops an intense headache and ringing in his ears. He blows his nose many times, but cannot clear the noxious smell of the polluted water. Over the next several weeks, the headaches increase and he notices that he has developed an intermittent facial tic and an occasional uncontrollable twitching of his right index finger. He finds that he has difficulty forming words and misinterprets road signs and speech.
When he is found mumbling and walking in circles in the laboratory parking lot, his research partner takes him to the emergency room where a CT Scan reveals multiple small growths in various areas of his brain.
He is admitted to the hospital for further testing. That night, he complains to the nurse that he feels like “things” are crawling under his skin. She summons the on-call doctor who finds him naked on the floor having a gran mal seizure, his body covered with a red-brown rash.
Doctor Fiction expects someone to write this book and will look for it on the NYT Bestseller list next fall.
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littlemissmeggie · 4 years
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@xoxosoulshine replied to your post “so i had an MRI last week and they found a lesion on my brain”
@littlemissmeggie oh no!!! That's is terrible! I dont know the situation really but I wish I could throat punch your old doctor!! I hate that for you!! Xoxo.
ok i know you didn’t ask for this but everything that’s been happening lately has seemed so ridiculous that i just have to write it out.
i started having seizures when i was 15. my mom found a neurologist at yale-new haven hospital—i’m not sure how she found him because i don’t really remember much from that time period—and we drove down to yale to meet with dr. mcveety. after several appointments and a few tests—an MRI, a CT scan, and a sleep-deprived EEG—he diagnosed me with generalized idiopathic epilepsy and had me on the first anti-epileptic drug of many. (we were told nothing unusual showed on any of the tests.) things seemed to be fairly well controlled and i saw him six months after the diagnosis for a check-up.
after a year and a half with him, he must have thought everything was fine and i wasn’t really worth his time anymore because he pawned me off on his wife, his practice’s physician assistant. i didn’t really like beth from the start—she was cold and didn’t really seem to listen to my answers to her questions or take my concerns seriously—but after i started having focal onset aware seizures, i really didn’t like her. i’d researched online because i had no idea what was happening and when i told her that i thought i was having focal aware seizures, she told me that she hated when patients self-diagnosed and that i was making it up. after a few appointments and many more focal aware seizures, my mom insisted we see a different doctor. (i will never forget that day. my mom had a fit in the office, told beth she was a bitch, demanded to dr. mcveety’s face that we have a “real” doctor, and told him that beth wasn’t even qualified but just had the job because she was his wife.)
so i ended up with dr. cretella. things started off fine with her. she did at least believe me and changed my medication to one that controlled both tonic-clonic and focal onset aware seizures. i went back to see her every year for check-ups and a few times after significant break-through seizures. when i was finally able to get my license (in connecticut, you have to go six months without a seizure before you can get your drivers license.), i had to have her fill out a paper for the DMV stating that i had gone more than six months without a seizure; when i called the office to ask that the form be submitted, she seemed confused, like she wasn’t really sure what i was asking for, which i thought was odd.
after an evening in july 2014 during which i had no less than six seizures and totalled my car, i went for a visit and dr. cretella changed my medicine. and seemed surprised to learn that i drove. 
after that, i started seeing her every two years. i often wondered why she never ran any tests to see if anything had changed, if everything was okay; she never ordered bloodwork, MRIs, EEGs, or CT scans. after the car accident, the hospital i was brought to ran a CT scan but i don’t think she ever even got the results and looked them over. i’ve also wondered why they only tried a sleep-deprived EEG once. when i first started having seizures, they were always when i was asleep. the point of the sleep-deprived EEG was that i would stay awake for 48 hours and then once i was wired, i would fall asleep and have a seizure and they could see my brain activity during a seizure. but i didn’t have a seizure, they didn’t do anything to induce one, and they never tried it again.
then this little bit of fuckery happened.
i saw a primary care physician who ordered bloodwork, an MRI, and sent a referral to a new neurology practice. i went for the MRI last wednesday and learnt yesterday that they found a lesion on my frontal lobe on the superior frontal gyrus.
after googling a bit yesterday, my boyfriend and i think it’s entirely possible that the lesion has been there the whole time and i was incorrectly diagnosed with generalized epilepsy when i should have been diagnosed with frontal lobe epilepsy; reading about FLE sounds a lot like reading about my life. my boyfriend asked me if i ever had night terrors when i was a kid because he’d read that often people think their child is having a night terror when it’s actually a type of frontal lobe seizure. i told him that my mother told dr. mcveety at our first appointment that i had night terrors all the time when i was a kid; mcveety hadn’t seemed too interested in that.
so tl;dr i’ve been with a shitty neurological practice since i started having seizures seventeen years ago. i’m finally going to a new practice and having tests run that should have been run regularly but never were. my new primary care doctor has found a lesion on my brain that i wouldn’t be surprised to learn has been there for 17+ years. i’m waiting to see my new neurologist on monday to see what she thinks and honestly, i’m just hoping that my last practice is as fucking shitty as i’m giving them credit for being and that it’s not a tumor or something.
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