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bigxrig · 1 year

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I have nothing to blame but my procrastination for not doing my November reads until now. Obviously, this is the last one of the year, and I am still undecided if I am going to be doing this next year. Tracking everything I read was a New Years resolution, and I am happy that I stuck to it! It was tiring and overwhelming and tedious, though. Turns out, I read a lot 🤪 But thank you to every author I read this year, you all made me feel less lonely.

Books

Interviewing For Her Lover by Ellis O. Day

Alpha by Jasinda Wilder

Take a Risk by Scarlett Finn

Fics

i am easy to find by @larrieblr

“Am I bothering you?”

Louis doesn’t have to look up to know who it is, not by the voice. He takes out the final package from the mailbox, a fond grin on his face as he answers, “Love, you could never bother me.” He stacks the package in the crook of his elbow, and looks up, then his smile falls into confusion. “But - wait, you’re supposed to be at work?”

“I finished a meeting, took an early lunch,” is Harry’s excuse, as he comes up by Louis, but not entirely. As if he’d been afraid to touch him.

Louis isn’t one to be observant, but today, now, Harry’s caught his eye, and something tells him to look closer.

Or, where two people try to follow their dreams but time isn't on their side.

One Touch Is Never Enough by @kingsofeverything

It’s been a rough year for Louis. First, he was turned into a werewolf, which hasn't been so bad, except that he didn't anticipate how it would affect his love life. Maybe it’d be easier to ignore if he wasn’t constantly bombarded by the sound of his two werewolf best friends getting it on in the next room.

At least they were nice enough to give him a gift certificate for a massage.

1d Trick or Treat Fest 2022

When Witches Go Riding by @uhoh-but-yeah-alright

Harry finds out Zayn is dressing as a witch for a Halloween party they'll both be attending and hopes that surprising her with a couples costume will pay off.

greased lightnin' by @larrieblr

After Louis mentions on an interview that he still has the jacket from his Grease days, Harry knows just the thing to wear for Halloween.

feast on your chaos by creamcoffeelou

The cloth is pulled away from his eyes slowly, dim candle light filling the room around him and illuminating two figures at the foot of the bed. They’re identical, exact mirrors of one another as Louis’ eyes bounce between them. “Of all the lovely offerings we’ve been given, I’d have to say this is my favorite,”

OR: Louis jokes that he'll try to summon a demon to lose his virginity. Maybe it's not as much of a joke as he thought.

Every Bit of Mine by @skipperxao3

Harry is an enigma. Louis still loves him.

everyone's entitled to one good score by @levelofcharm

Harry pouts, mocking. “So now you know, you're scared of me?”

Louis settles for a curt head shake, voice breaking as, “no,” slips past his trembling lips.

“Of course you’re not. You know you’re the love of my very long life, I’d never hurt you. Unless,” he hums inquisitively, sliding the knife down Louis’ sternum, catching the tip on the equally cheap spandex shorts, “you want me to, and…I think you do.”

Harry lets Louis’ limp arm fall to his side and, at that, a wicked smile carves onto his lips.

“We can play hide and seek. Go on, try to hide bunny,” he coos as he taps the cool knife to Louis’ heated cheek teasingly, his voice switching with ease to something stern and serious, “but hope I don’t find you.”

Louis has suspected his husband isn't what he says and is determined to be right this Halloween. Inspired by this prompt.

Cookbooks and Toothpicks and One Lizard by @londonfoginacup

If there is one thing that Harry hates about Halloween, it’s what a spectacle everyone suddenly makes around him.

Sure, he loves his friends, but he really wishes that this one, singular day of the year they could all just be chill. It’s as if for 364 days they forget what his profession is entirely, and then all remember at the same moment on the morning of October 31st. Oh yeah! I have a friend who is a witch! I should reconnect with him on this particular day, I’m sure he’s not already got plans of any kind!

Well not this year. This year he's going to the library.

Like a Powder Keg About to Explode by @uhoh-but-yeah-alright

Niall enjoyed Louis' Bastille Day special so much that he's booked a private session for him and his lady on Guy Fawkes Day.

brothers? by @thedevilinmybrain

"I mean, I've never had a brother, so maybe what Louis and I do in our free time really is just familial bonding." Harry's grin turns wicked, gets that little glint in his eye that unfairly makes Louis' cock jump again. "We just do what other brothers do, right? No funny business."

Curves of Your Lips Rewrite History by @lunarheslwt

“Kneel.”

The prince obliged like a puppet whose strings had been cut, dropping to his knees in one fluid motion. With his bowed back, compliant silence, and eyes that lowered respectfully; he was a perfect picture of submission and trust. He deserved to be captured by Michelangelo, right at this moment, but alas, Louis found himself to be possessive of pretty things. And Harry was, by far, his most ethereal and dear possession. Made sweeter only because he allowed himself to be.

“Grace becomes you, when you submit to me,” Louis finally crooned, a ghost of a caress across a delicate cheek sparking goosebumps, “your Highness.”

And if Louis were a less attentive man, he would’ve missed the quiet gasp that the title weaved with a taunt coaxed out. A smile curled across his lips. So easy to please, for someone who had everything his heart desired at his fingertips.

Or, everyone bows to Prince Harry, but in the privacy of his four walls, the one he is bowing and kneeling for is his knight, Sir Louis.

Printed Against The Sky by @larrysballetslippers

“Daddy?”

“Yeah, beautiful?” Louis got lost in his thoughts for a second, but Harry’s breathless words brought him right back.

Harry stared at him and looked like he wanted to cry. “Are we making cookies? You… promised.”

“Yes, of course. Daddy just needs to figure out what to make, because we don’t have many ingredients,” Louis explained slowly, but Harry still looked ready to cry. “Do you want to help me?”

Or, after some intense weeks of promo, Harry really wants his daddy. Louis happily fulfils his needs, but it wasn't the best day to do so.

With this Wing, I Thee Wed by @ladyaj-13

“Nando’s?”

Niall crosses his arms and pouts, a little line appearing between his eyebrows. “I want Nandos. I like Nandos.”

“And I like my dignity,” Louis mutters.

So Wise by @neondiamond

Harry’s a little out of it after having his wisdom teeth removed. Louis is there to take care of him.

Wanna Play You Like a Game, Boy (what's the thrill of the same toy?) by @thebreadvansstuff

"You forgot to proofread the document? And you're only telling me -" Mr. Tomlinson glances at his watch, "- one minute before the meeting?"

Harry's heart pounds like a drum in his chest, hands flying out in front of him, as if to stop Mr. Tomlinson's trail of thought. "I can - I will do it right now, sir." Harry's shaking hands fumble with the documents lying on his desk, searching for the contract. "I only need a few minutes, please let me - "

Mr. Tomlinson puts a palm up, effectively shutting Harry up. "I don't think you understand the importance of this meeting, Mr. Styles," he snaps in a steely tone. "Find the document and bring it to the meeting room immediately."

Harry’s fingers may be slightly trembling while he digs through the pile of documents ahead of him, but the twist in his stomach is something completely unrelated to nerves.

✗✗✗

Or, Louis is Harry's boss, and Harry has a humiliation kink.

The Roses in the Rose Garden by @wishingforloushair

He realised he was still standing stark bollock naked, effectively peacocking at this man, stumbling through an apology while doing absolutely nothing to recover his dignity. Cupping his hands around his dick, he cursed the fact that his body had chosen that moment to send all the blood south, leaving nothing in his dumb brain to even remember where he’d left the towel, or anything other than his fucking hands.

Harry is a yoga instructor at Everforest Hotel, who is just trying to get through life without too many mistakes. When he goes to the spa on Niall's suggestion, a series of unfortunate events lead him to accidentally flashing his masseuse, Louis.

Next Door by @allwaswell16

When a stray cat starts coming round Louis' garden and bothering his dog, Louis and his best friend set out to capture it.

Or a famous/famous fic where Louis and Oli embarrass themselves in front of Batman.

Every Snowflake Is Different (Just Like You) by @hellolovers13

Turns out, getting snowed in with your not quite One-Night Stand wasn’t actually that bad.

But the snow wouldn’t last forever.

Was there a chance for love even after the snow had melted?

Taken by aace1234

Louis is 22, an award winning architect whose trying to put his past trauma of being kidnapped behind him.

Scott Wolf and Harry Styles are two detectives that were there through Louis trauma, essentially saved his life and lead the case.

They haven't seen each other in over a year, but what happens when the case breaks wide open again and Harry and Scott come spiralling back into Louis life again.

Whisper Your Desires, I'll Provide Them by @happilyyhalo

Louis has always been a standout, but there is one department she lacks in.

She’s a virgin.

Now, there’s nothing wrong with being a virgin or lacking in sexual experience. Everyone has different views and ideas on sex, and no one should be shamed because of that. However, it is hard to ignore the peer pressure from society and others.

So, when Harry, her lifelong best friend, offers to help with her situation, there’s nothing that’s going to happen, right?

Over My Shoulder by @nouies

The media thinks omega singer Louis Tomlinson is dating alpha actor Sebastian Stan because they bump into each other all the time.

Everything changes when they accidentally bond.

When I Said Forever by @finelinegynandromorph

or, harry is struggling to find meaning in the rainy countryside. louis is a steady constant as harry wades through the mire of past trauma. dark and moody, with some light at the end of a muddy tunnel

Love In Conversation by @hellolovers13

King Arthur Baking Hotline.

Your bread fell flat. Your cookies crumbled. Who do you turn to? The King Arthur Baker’s Hotline.

Louis has a severe baking breakdown.

Thankfully, he gets help from baking-hotline operator Harry.

An Angel For Christmas by @larrysballetslippers

Louis barely makes it on the last train home for Christmas, exhausted and agitated she just wants to rest. Her peace gets interrupted by the most obnoxious and constant sneezing ever, but her irritations lead to miracles.

purr and shout by anditsonlyforthebrave

The sound that escapes Harry's mouth couldn't possibly be a purr. He's an alpha, alphas don't purr. Or do they?

~~~

Prompt 478: Inspired by this post. A fic with a scene where alpha Harry has never had a proper serious relationship before Louis and when Louis washes his hair for the first time, he surprises Louis and himself by purring loudly.

Slow Hands by @hellolovers13

“Wait. So when you say you’re genderfluid, that means sometimes you’re a girl, right?”

“Uh, yeah.”

“So when I asked what you’d do if you were a girl and you said ‘Niall’. Does that apply now?”

never been a fan of change, but we're still the same by @onlythebravest

“Why didn’t you call me?” Louis demanded. “As usual?”

Niall grimaced and reluctantly said, “He said you would make him drop.”

“Make him, how?” Liam asked worriedly, then quickly turned to Louis with almost judging eyes, asking, “You’d never force him to drop, right?”

“Fuck no,” Louis said firmly, shaking his head. “Never.” He’d never force Harry to drop unless he wanted to drop. Jesus, are his friends all idiots?

(Harry and Louis have relied on each other for over two years now, always turning to each other every time they need anything from touch to pheromones. But after Harry's omega unexpectedly causes him to drop in the pub, their relationship is no longer the same.)

Flick's High Dive by daemont

C.J. invites Flick to try some cliff diving, but the chameleon doesn't exactly feel confident in his abilities.

Love Drunk, Waiting On A Miracle by @hellolovers13

Christmas inspired Coffeshop AU

Harry has a bit of a crush on a customer. Thankfully, the feeling is mutual.

These are their first 24 days together.

Cut me up, kiss me harder by @lunarheslwt

“Y’know, you push and push and you’re mouthy and defiant, but it’s all an act isn’t it,” Harry pressed tauntingly. He was helpless to not tilt Louis’ face back up to him by placing a hand under his chin. Louis’ eyes fluttered in response.

“You just want to be roughed up a little,” he continued, voice dropping. Louis swallowed harshly, keening.

“You just want to be made to take it.”

“God, shut UP!!” Louis hissed, fisting roughly at his shirt.

“You don’t want that either,” Harry mumbled.

“Are you like this with every other omega you fuck too? How does anyone,” Louis seethed, crowding into his space further, “beg you to fuck them when you’re so full of it?”

“Who said they do?” Harry asked. “Unless,” he began, voice devious, “You’re speaking for yourself. Is that it? Are you gonna beg for my knot, then? Hmm?”

“Shut the fuck up,” Louis bit out. Harry had no time to think before Louis crashed his lips onto his again.

Or, a group of friends, a slightly drunk alternate version of spin the bottle, and the universe having a wicked sense of humour may just be enough to bring one bratty omega and a tired-of-said-omega’s-bullshit alpha closer than they’ve ever been. In more ways than one.

Worries, Kisses, and Surprises by @neondiamond

Harry and Louis are hosting Christmas dinner with both of their families for the very first time. Harry is a little stressed out about it, but for a good reason.

Did You Ever Feel Like A Fire Hydrant (And all your friends are dogs) by anonymous

Harry is roped into a wet night to remember.

I'm Insatiable, it's all your fault by @larrydoinglaundry

Harry has met many, many attractive people during his heats before, some of whom have been on the brink of their ruts, and he has never wanted to spread his legs open as much as he wants to do it right now.

All Louis has to do is sit right there on the chair, and Harry is ready to present.

Louis' scent wraps around him like a tender hug, intoxicating in the best possible way. It smells so much like a picnic in a forest; something sweet yet sophisticated like dark chocolate, sprinkled with a touch of pine and rain. It’s everything Harry is addicted to.

The last thing Harry expected when he started a new job was to meet his truebond. The only problem is, his truebond happens to be one of his students, and he's never been the man to dismiss his morals.

Sweet Nothings by @huggieshalo

“Love, wake up please.” Harry said as he squatted down, running his hand through his hair.

Louis’s eyes suddenly flew open, tossing his body to one side. Letting out a loud yelp, it turned into loud wails.

Oh fuck.

or Louis reached home after the broken arm saga and Harry found him in little space after waking up from his nap.

No one's gonna know by @jishlerfics

Harry can’t look away from the ribbon. He can’t process it, can’t hear his own thoughts over the roaring rush of blood in his ears.

“Don’t you look pretty?” Harry hears Louis’ voice as if from far away.

Or: Harry and Louis go to a party.

Two Days and I'll Be Home by @neondiamond

Harry comes home to Louis for the holidays.

The prettiest customer (and the cutest barista) by @onlythebravest

“So there’s this guy,” Harry repeated. “And I really like him.”

“Is he cute?”

“The cutest,” Harry said with a bright smile, turning around to face Louis. His cheeks felt warm, but he ignored it, pushed past it. “Prettiest boy I’ve ever seen.”

“Ooh, tell me more.” Louis rested his head in his hand.

(Louis is the pretty customer that comes in and orders hot chocolate while Harry is the cute barista that tak

Your Gift is Wasted On Me by @bravetemptation

“He had a partner for a long time, and he says that he was too dependent. He doesn’t want an alpha, at least not right now. But he’s got a pretty severe case of touch deprivation. So it’s … not great.”

“Is there anything …”

“He doesn’t like to be touched. There was an incident a few weeks ago and he just … he can’t bear human touch.”

________

Omega Louis has severe touch deprivation and is averse to touch. But he’s fine. Really.

Alpha Harry is the new neighbor who loves to bake cookies and is very curious about the omega across the hall.

Know My Pronouns by asbowden14

“Well, I think she looks awfully pretty today.” Harry’s eyes widen at not only the statement but the pronoun, blushing furiously as Louis’ arm swung around his shoulders and pulled him into his side.

“Hey, leave them alone! You so much as think of touching them again and I’ll kick your fucking ass.” Harry cried.

“That’s my boy.” Harry wanted to kiss Louis.

Or the one in which Harry is gender fluid and he falls a bit more in love every time Louis uses the correct pronouns.

Softer, Softest by @littleroverlouis @berzerkshires

A lazy Sunday afternoon of Harry appreciating the softness of Lou's body.

Here where you should be by @lunarheslwt

“I’m spending Christmas alone.”

Harry would never have thought of himself as dramatic, but he could swear he felt his heart lurch at the quiet admission.

“Huh?”

“Just me, myself and I,” Louis joked, giving a little laugh. “It’s about to be a very….ah, silent night.”

And Harry was so distraught at this news, that he didn’t even chuckle at the pun.

“Louis,” he said dumbly, voice betraying how upsetting he found the idea. The sparkle in Louis’ eyes dulled further.

“Don’t you worry about me, Harry,” Louis soothed, “It’s not that big a deal-”

“-Would you like to spend Christmas with me?”

And what. the. fuck. Why did he ask that to someone who was essentially a stranger?

Or, when Harry, an anxious alpha, found himself panicking over last minute Christmas shopping, he found comfort in the kind omega shop assistant, Louis. He wasn't meant to invite the omega home for Christmas when he found out that he's spending Christmas alone. He wasn't meant to catch feelings. Hell, he wasn't even meant to be able to go home for the holiday. It was shaping up to be a Christmas full of surprises.

Perfume Purgatory by @littleroverlouis

Louis is enduring the purgatory of selling perfume as a seasonal employee at the department store where her girlfriend, Harry, is employed.

She still hates the mall but needs the extra cash to purchase Harry a special gift.

Harry lives next door to Louis and babysits his daughter. He might be hopelessly in love with Louis and desperate to be part of his little family, but he’s ignoring that in favour of trying to make Louis’s busy life as easy as possible. When he finds out Louis and his daughter don’t believe in Santa - someone who is universally considered a real person - he makes it his mission to convince them. Along the way he takes in a man who may or may not actually be Santa, and everyone’s Christmas wishes might come true.

maybe this christmas by you_explode

A Miracle on 34th Street AU.

I Wish U Were Inside Me by @larrysballetslippers

His breathless whimpers echoed through the room, Harry missed Louis’ loud moans, his breathing didn’t even pick up as Harry thrust into him. It irritated him, even though he was used to it, Harry wanted Louis to be loud. He wanted his lover to scream his name, tell him that he was a good boy, and had the best dick. However, the room was just filled with Louis’ pheromones and Harry’s moans.

Or, Louis likes to be fucked while sleeping, Harry isn't sure if he's allowed this night.

Make You Mine This Season by @disgruntledkittenface

After Harry’s Christmas plans fall through, she decides to surprise her best friend Nick in New York. Unfortunately, Nick decided to surprise her in San Francisco at the same time. When they realize what happened, they each resign themselves to staying and spending time in the other’s city. Harry tries to make the best of things, making elaborate plans to distract herself from feeling lonely, while Nick is just looking forward to her first real vacation from her hectic job in years. Neither of them will have the Christmas that they expected, but maybe they’ll each get the one that they need.

One for the Books by @neondiamond

When Harry decides to move to London a few weeks before Christmas to pursue his dream and become the new owner of a bookshop after seeing an ad online, everyone he knows tells him he must be out of his mind. As he gets acquainted with his new life and meets a handful of incredible individuals—one of which he happens to grow particularly fond of—he slowly comes to the realisation that it may just be the best decision he's ever made.

Or the one where there’s a bookshop, a cat, OT5 friendship, a budding romance, and all the festive vibes.

Set the Sky, Oh Holy Night by @londonfoginacup

“It’s a starter home,” Niall says. He looks ridiculously proud. Louis does not think he should look that proud.

“That bathtub’s fallen through the ceiling,” Louis points out.

“Starter home,” Niall emphasises.

One house, five almost-strangers (plus Niall), six new beginnings.

Happy Christmas, here's to many more.

Advent Drabbles by @berzerkshires

#28th appreciation #november reads #december reads #monthly reads #hlcreators #trackinghome #trackinghappily #tracksintheam #1dsource #yeah im definitely not doing this next year lol

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messy-does-cosmology · 3 months

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OK so I've had some plans for my new year's resolutions this year and so far they are going well-ish. But I thought I would post some of my experiences here since I love reading about other people doing it!

This is mostly focused on goals to do with trying to get better from my serious depression, which has been haunting me since about summer 2022, when my childhood friend killed herself. Anyway um reminder not to do that. Your life touches so many people, you have no idea the number of people who love you and who would drop everything to help. Killing yourself may be easier than changing your life into one you want to live, but it is also much much worse.

In January I am doing yoga every day (following the YWA challenge, which I also did last year and continued on for several months after). So far, I haven't missed a day or even postponed a day. I can't promise that won't happen but so far so good! Honestly I'm a natural procrastinator, and at first the positions were just as hard and uncomfortable as they were when I first started, but now I massively look forward to it every day! I am extremely bad at doing it significantly before bed though, and I'm lucky that it doesn't seem to have affected my sleep goals much.

I'm also doing Dry January, which, ngl, is pretty easy for me. It's much harder for my partner, who enjoys alcohol a lot and has definite alcoholic tenancies. Dry January really tends to reset our drinking as a couple though, and get us to be more intentional with it for at least a few months afterwards. We're also going to do stoptober this year, and I think it will be great to have another "firebreak" in the year for drinking.

Me and my partner both got FitBits in November/December, and they have been really life changing in terms of the amount of exercise we do now, and our habits. My partner is also able to see the direct impact that drinking has on his health metrics (like HRV). I have learned that my HRV is absolute garbage, and idk why lol.

My final goal for January was to stick to a regular sleep schedule. This is going pretty well so far. For context, my usual sleep schedual was very unhelpful. I would go to bed at wildly varying times, same with waking up, I would sometimes only fall asleep at like 6am, I would sleep until 3pm regularly. It was miserable, and terrible for my mental health. I have only had two slip ups this month, one where I woke up at almost 1pm, and one where I went to sleep at around 2:50am or so (still so much better than before!!). Honestly this one has been the hardest, but having a fitbit to keep me accountable has really helped.

Another thing I have found extremely helpful this month is a supplement called L-glutamine. Because of my diet, my very very bad disordered diet, I basically get no nutrients anyway. I have tried taking supplements before, but they have never had this much of an impact! L-glutamine is just an amino acid which is fuel for your gut biome and helps you recover faster from exercise. It seems to have helped with so much more though! I am more awake, my hunger signals are more normal and less deathly painful, and my body feels much better able to cope with the increased exercise I'm getting (we moved house, so I am now either walking 40 mins or biking to work instead of the bus, so lots more exercise overall). Honestly couldn't reccomend enough. I would say if you get some though, get the powder version and not the capsules. In order to get an adequate dose per day, you need to take loads of capsules, around 15g of the powder. I mix the powder with fizzy drinks (I know) and just drink it. A little gritty at first, but I got used to it fast.

#January Update #Mac's 2024 depression assblasting

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cafalla · 4 months

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New Year Resolutions - 2024

I'm not typically someone who thinks long and hard about my New Year's Resolutions. I tend to always have the same vague goals in mind that usually involve losing weight and trying to look better (sad, I know).

I think the fact that I turn 30 this coming year has made me reflect more on the type of person I'd like to be - I'm entering a new season of life here soon and I'm not satisfied with where I'm at as far as my own personal growth is concerned.

And really, the things I'm dissatisfied with are all things that I can easily change. Nothing is so drastic or monumental that it's impossible for me to start working on. I just need to start.

So moving forward, these are my goals:

Goal 1: Pick up on reading again

I read a total of I think...2 books in 2023. I used to read 2 books (sometimes more) in a week. It's just sad. I read a lot on my phone, but I'd like to swap screen time for book time. In the same vein, I'd also like to utilize the library more.

I think a very reasonable goal for me to is to complete 1 book a month. I started the book "The Memory Keeper's Daughter" a couple of months back. I'm only about 4 or 5 chapters into it, even though I was hooked at the time of reading. I just sort of fell off reading it for no reason (it's still on my nightstand, collecting dust).

I'd like to get back to that book and finish reading it by the end of January. Then try to read a book per month? That sounds reasonable.

Goal 2: Pick up on working out/moving more again

Pretty self explanatory, and probably a goal on everyone's NYR list. I know I feel better when I move in every way, even if I'm not actively losing weight - I have more energy, my body feels flexible, my clothing fits better, I don't feel achy or stiff. Really no excuse for this one because our gym isn't that far from us and we have plenty of sidewalks to walk on outside.

Goal 3: Don't spent frivolously/try to only keep to the essentials

This one is a bit of a newer thing for me. I've been very into watching no-buy videos on YouTube, and while I don't think I can be that strict with myself, I know there are many things I can cut down on spending wise.

I'm working on taking things down to the bare essentials, especially in the bathroom. I only want one of each thing: one shampoo, one face wash, one moisturizer, one serum, etc. Sometimes I have had up to 2 or 3 products for one purpose, and it overwhelms me.

Honestly, I'm almost already to the point of having figured out my favorite products that work for me, but I do have some spare items I need to use up (but do not plan on repurchasing). I only want to buy these items when I need them, nothing more, nothing less. I'm tired of letting things go bad because I don't use them. I'm producing unnecessary waste and losing money!!

This basic idea also applies to other things, such as food, home goods, etc. Like am I buying something I will really use or enjoy as a treat, or am I just wanting the high of purchasing something I don't really need.

Sometimes it's unavoidable, but I'd like to try and be better and more mindful about my purchases.

Goal 4: De-clutter, tidy, and be on top of donating/selling stuff

I try to de-clutter at least a couple times a year. I think I'm pretty good at it, but I need to be on top of donating and selling stuff I do not intend to keep. I tend to make a pile for each and then...procrastinate actually donating or selling the items. I just need to act quickly and get rid of them asap.

If my space has less stuff, then it is much easier to routinely clean. I'd also like to focus on cleaning more this year, in a way that doesn't force me to do a huge deep clean that stresses me out and exhausts me. If I keep spaces relatively clean throughout the week on a regular basis, then I have less to clean when I really need to dig in and deep clean...y'know?

Goal 5: Stay hydrated

I just need to work on keeping hydrated on a regular basis. That's all!

Goal 6: Save money

Saving is always a goal of mine. I'd like to save up a little more than enough to finish paying off my car this year, and build my savings back up to a comfortable amount. It's currently not terrible, but it's not where I'd like it to be.

I think this one is easily do-able, especially if I cut back on spending on things I don't truly need.

Goal 7: Take the time to learn new skills

This mainly pertains to me needing to sit down and actually learn SQL...my boyfriend keeps encouraging me to learn it. I also want to learn it to hopefully move on to a better paying job, but it intimidates me.

I'd like to start taking small steps into learning it this year. Maybe I can finish the year with a certificate or something.

This also applies to crafting. Not that I myself am an avid crafter, but I think it'd be fun to do small crafts here and there throughout the year. I'm thinking mainly for gift giving occasions. I stretched myself so thin money wise this year for Christmas, but I think I can plan ahead and spend less money but give better gifts...if that makes sense.

/ /

But yeah, I think that's about it for my 2024 goals!

All in all, the theme for me is to be more mindful and proactive in many different facets of my life. I've felt quite thoughtless in regards to myself, and I want to put in some more effort to feel like a whole rounded person again.

#txt #diary entry #new year resolutions

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ravenheartxvi · 6 months

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Good News!

Chapter 4 of Second Chances is officially in the works! It took me a while to figure out the outline for the chapter and then how to expand the outline. Meanwhile I got sidetracked by my Anidala Modern AU and well... life.

As an appreciation for my reader's patience and an apology for my procrastination, here is a sneak peak of the beginning of the rough draft of the opening scene. Special thanks to Fialleril for introducing their worldbuilding for Tatooine Slave Culture. It gets mentioned in my fic though it is not the focus. I enjoyed exploring this wonderful fandom as I delve into the psychology of Anakin Skywalker.

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When Anakin Skywalker was a boy, he spent his days toiling under the heat of twin suns for a harsh master who held the controls of his very life in his hands. At night, his mother, worn down by the same life, yet resolute in her belief in fate, in the inherent goodness of others, hidden and bogged down by fear and greed, would tuck him in and tell him a story. Her stories were often spoken in hushed, reverent tones, in the secret language of their people. She would speak of their history, the legends that made up their home. Those legends consisted of mythic figures, godlike in their fables. Shmi Skywalker often talked about Ar-Amu, the mother, but little Anakin skywalker had favored the stories about Ekkreth the unfettered, the trickster, the slave who made free, and from whom they had received their family name.

Little Anakin Skywalker had believed in Ekkreth without question, and he had believed that it was Ekkreth who had sent a Jedi and his company into their path to free them. It nearly broke him to learn that he would have to leave his mother behind in chains while he flew away, free to walk the sky. As Anakin grew, and he threw himself into his Jedi training, in effort to ensure that Qui-Gon didn’t die in vain, to prove himself worthy of his place within the Jedi, he believed in the old stories of his childhood less and less.

As Anakin Skywalker held his dying mother in his arms and begged to the Force, to Ar-Amu to spare her life, to not let him be too late to come home, his faith in the stories of their people had shattered. A piece of Anakin Skywalker died that night in that Tusken Camp along with Shmi Skywalker. The stories that Shmi used to tell her son at night were just that, stories.

“I tell you these stories, My Son, so that they might save your life one day,” Shmi Skywallker would whisper to her beloved son as she kissed his forehead goodnight.

Stories, fables, legends were nothing more than a small comfort to make a life of cruelty more bearable. Anakin was certain of this as he scoffed at the very idea of something so outlandish being true. He had turned his back on the heritage he was born within, favoring the knowledge that he knew to be true. The Force, which he could touch, feel, understand through his training, was far more real than any mythical figure in a bedtime story. There was no story that can withstand a lightsaber, nor can it combat against the greatest feat of the Force.

Stories were nothing more than a lie anyway, Anakin Skywalker, the former Darth Vader in another life, knew this to be true with a fatalistic certainty. After all, it was with the use of a fallacy, disguised as such a story, that had been the catalyst for the destruction of Anakin Skywalker and the birth of Darth Vader. If not for the tempting lie, crafted in the form of a story told to him by a man he was foolish enough to trust, he would not have fallen for the trap that doomed him, everyone he ever loved and the entire galaxy.

Stories do not save lives, they give false hope. Anakin Skywalker had no time for stories. He had a time-sensitive mission, after all. He needed to focus, to plan ahead, because the enemy is always several steps ahead. Anakin needed to rise ahead of Sidious. Sidious had decades to plot and all Anakin had was a little over a year or less if he wasn’t careful.

#anakin skywalker #star wars #time travel fix it #mentions of Tatooine slave culture #fanfiction #character psychology

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jobey-wan-kenobi · 1 year

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Two-Bit and Marcia

I see all y’all’s cute headcanons about them dating and defying their respective family/friends and being a sweet happy lil’ couple. I want that to be true but it just rings false to me. No way. Can’t happen. Not in their world. (Also, let’s be honest, Two-Bit’s drunk ass should not be marrying anyone, certainly not some sheltered young girl with poor conflict resolution skills.)

Here’s what I do see happening. It’s way later in life. Like, mid-80s? Reagan’s in the White House. Neither is in Tulsa anymore. They’ve both wound up, indirectly, in a not-too-far away city, like, I dunno. Edmonton or Fayetteville. They know through the grapevine the other is living there too but don’t seek each other out. It’s serendipitous, the day they run into each other. It’s a treat. Not gonna lie, it’s a special treat for both of them when they find out pretty quickly that they’re both single.

Date night! Dinner and drinks at a bar. Both are a little nervous but they wind up spilling their guts and roasting each other the whole time. There’s bowling involved. It sounds lame, and compared to their teenage years of course it is, but it’s still a blast, because it’s them.

Both of them feel like they’ve pretty much fucked up their lives so far. The more they share, the more comfortable they both feel sharing more. Marcia tells him about her asshole ex and how most of their kids hate both of them right now and how she’s living like a fugitive to avoid getting served papers because her husband got photographs of her screwing around with another man while they were unofficially separated. Two-Bit tells her about the stupidest and most embarrassing arrests he’s been put under. The late 60s and 70s weren’t kind to him. He made a lousy hippie. But he was a big fan of the drugs. He has a kid too. His kid adores him, because he visits only occasionally. He’s Disneyland Dad. Two-Bit doesn’t push the mom for more because he knows she’s right that it’s not good for the kid to expect consistency that he can’t live up to.

Both of them roast themselves. This is Two-Bit and Marcia. They don’t just make polite awkward self-deprecating jokes. It’s not “funny.” It’s not fishing for compliments. It’s brutal. And they don’t reassure each other. They roast each other too. They talk and laugh loudly but they’re in their own old language of metaphors and wordplay and non-sequiturs. No one understands them. It’s okay to tell each other all of their fuck-ups though. Neither of them is surprised. Neither of them thinks any less of the other. “You haven’t changed,” Two-Bit tells her. “You stop that,” Marcia says, “I wish.” “Fine, you’ve changed. You’ve grown up.” “I’ve still got that same stick up my ass.” Two-Bit lights up. He starts trying to physically locate it. In the bar. She has to throw some of her drink in his face. They leave sniping and laughing.

Once they meet, Marcia gets more serious about getting her affairs in order. She gets a new lawyer, stops playing games and procrastinating, gets the divorce finalized. She does get screwed quite a bit but at least it’s a closed book now. Two-Bit goes back to AA for, like, the eighth time? It’s different this time. Everyone can tell. He didn’t come to make friends. He didn’t come to get an audience for his “and I’m a shit-faced motherfucker!” jokes. He came to finally advance past Step 4.

They drive to Vegas to elope. They like being on the road so much that they stick with it for years, becoming antiques and mechanical parts dealers. They kill at it. Eventually they decide to settle in one spot again, but they don’t lose their zest for life. Two-Bit is steadily employed by the time his kid graduates and he puts the kid through college. They make new friends. Not greasers or Socs or suburban robots or criminals. Just regular ordinary people.

#the outsiders #two-bit #two-bit matthews #headcanons

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ilaiyayaya · 4 months

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I'm Not Late It's Still January 1st Shut, Shut Up

Can we just like imagine that today is not 4 days after New Years and that it is instead still New Years and I did not once again spend nearly a week procrastinating writing 5 sentences about random words that pop up in my brain okay?

I don't normally make any kind of new years resolutions or anything like that because I am incapable of holding myself accountable for any kind of long-term goal, but I am at least glad that there are no more upcoming holidays and that I can go back to normal levels of mentally ill instead of christmas levels of mentally ill. I do have some goals tho, but I wouldn't really consider them "new year's resolutions", moreso just long-term goals that I've had for a while that I'm somewhat closer to reaching this year than I ever have been in the past. My first priority is absolutely moving out of my father's house, I hate living in this hell-hole and I have for a long time, originally my goal was to be out by the end of March of this year, but I started searching for apartments to move out to around September, and failed to take into account the fact that the time right before Christmas is probably the worst time to be looking for available apartments, and that I always get cripplingly depressed around the holidays which makes it kinda hard to motivate myself to do anything actually productive (no clue how I didn't foresee the 2nd one, that happens every year). So yeah I pretty much had to put that on hold for a while so that end of March goal definitely isn't happening now, so instead now I think I'm just gonna go for an "as soon as realistically possible" deadline lol. I'd also like to start hrt, that's definitely not realistically happening this year though, I'd have to be out on my own before I even start looking into that, and from what I've heard the process of going through doctors to actually get on hrt is a nightmare and can take forever, so almost definitely not a this year goal, but still a goal. I'd also like to get back to doing art of any kind, there's not really anything stopping me, just myself, but like, maybe I'll feel like opening up Clip Studio or Blender, or buying more painting supplies again sometime this year.

I guess I also would like to use this blog more often, I'm not gonna like force myself to write like everyday or anything, I feel like if I did that after a while it would just create more issues, but venting every once in a while is actually pretty good and helpful and I don't do that enough. I'm really bad about just not opening up at all to anyone around me, so having a space where I'm pretty much just be talking to myself that's also relatively disconnected from a majority of the rest of my life is pretty therapeutic. Nowhere else can I write 5 paragraphs about idk the sex appeal of Metal Sonic's hands or something, and not be yelled at for being weird (and if I do get yelled at for being weird GIANT DEATH LASER KILL). Also I need to actually post more things instead of just making 50 drafts each month and not having the confidence/motivation to actually finish or post most of them. Need to make my posts more unhinged too, need more Terriermon-button-core posts, I truly am at my peak 5 minutes after waking up, and after 30 hours of no sleep. I should probably also try to be less self-conscious about reblogging stuff, I have literally no reason to be and should do it more.

Extra special bonus goal: IF I DON'T FINISH EVERY SINGLE FUCKING VISUAL NOVEL THAT I'VE STARTED READING IN THE LAST 2 MONTHS BY THE END OF THE YEAR I'M GONNA yoshi I STARTED TOO MANY HELP

#imagine dragons more like imaghine magneton and tangela making out hamster dance style

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ziqitzahealthcareltd0 · 1 year

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Ziqitza Healthcare Ltd - Tips to achieve your New Year resolution this year

Everyone appears to have a notion of what they want their new year to look like on January 1—from adopting healthier habits to picking up new skills. But we've all made resolutions for the new year that we swiftly abandoned. It's challenging to keep the promises we've made to ourselves once the fresh "new year" sensation wears off and you go back into your regular routine.

You need a plan to hold yourself responsible if you want 2023 to be the year that you set and keep resolutions. One of India's top healthcare service providers, Ziqitza Healthcare ltd, offers their top advice for keeping New Year's resolutions. To assist yourself reach your goals this year, heed the tips.

1. Put it in writing: According to Ziqitza Healthcare, research has shown that writing out your objectives, aims, or resolutions by hand can increase your likelihood of success. In fact, a research by the Dominican University in California found that having set down your goals increased your chances of success by 42%.

2. Make It Fun: Spirit up your 2023 objectives. Goals are fun to achieve when you approach them with playfulness, according to Ziqitza, even though you presumably already know that they should be precise and time-bound. Give yourself rewards when you reach important milestones. Ziqitza Rajasthan advises creating goals that are exciting to pursue and enjoyable. Regularly review your goals to make sure you still desire to accomplish them. Enjoy your achievement and journey!

3. Make resolutions for the week rather than the year: Making commitments for the next year may seem enticing, but doing so requires a significant commitment. And failing to meet it might cause great disappointment because it suggests that you have failed miserably. Making weekly promises is a superior strategy, according to Ziqitza Limited. This can entail continuing obligations from earlier weeks. Failure to fulfil a weekly obligation will result in a "blip" of a setback.

4. Make declarations instead of resolutions: Conventional resolutions sometimes fail before January is over. Make three (and only three) decisions for 2023 that will change your life or career. For instance, "I will learn to play the piano," "I will close the biggest deal of my career," or "My body fat percentage will be X." As long as the concepts appeal to your desire for knowledge, development, and adventure, the themes don't really matter. Make them really clear!

5. Establish a Vision Board: The creation of a vision board, according to ZHL Rajasthan, is one of the finest strategies to truly concretize your New Year's resolutions. Start by gathering words and pictures that best capture your goals and desired emotions. Create a collage using these. After that, take a seat and focus on your personal vision. Set up your vision board somewhere you will see it frequently. Make it happen then!

6. Be Prepared For Change: The main reason resolutions fail, according to Ziqitza Limited Rajasthan, is that people don't make the effort to get ready for the change. A mentality that is prepared for change includes seeing more advantages to change than disadvantages. This requires mental effort. Simply forcing yourself to change won't result in long-lasting transformation.

7. Develop Incremental Goals: Many people are aware of the acronym S.M.A.R.T. Take it a step further by making it incremental. Smaller milestones can help to motivate regular action, limit procrastination, and track progress. Instead of "eat lunch with 10 people in the corporate department in the next six months," make the goal "eat lunch with two people in the corporate department each month for the next six months."

8. Take Note of Your Limiting Thoughts: Focusing on your goals is an important part of achieving them. The second, and far less common, component is a focus on competing commitments. We consciously commit to our resolutions, such as expanding the business, while unconsciously committing to avoid rejection. According to Ziqitza Health Care Limited, this competing commitment may jeopardise our ability to achieve our resolutions.

9. Examine Your Habits: Resolutions rarely succeed, according to Ziqitza, because we have a propensity to concentrate on the major objective itself and ignore the steps that must be taken to get there. Every time you start working toward a new objective or vision, you must first determine which habits you need to adopt or shed in order to succeed. No matter what you want to accomplish, if you don't concentrate on the steps necessary to do it, you'll never succeed.

#Ziqitza #Ziqitza Healthcare #Ziqitza Healthcare ltd #Ziqitza Rajasthan #Ziqitza Limited #ZHL Rajasthan #Ziqitza Limited Rajasthan

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thedrakesteelforge · 1 year

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明けましておめでとうございます!!!

Happy New year!

We now have 365 days of 2023, We will probably spend half of them still writing 2022 though.

So, This post is going to be a little run down of my year, so I can reflect on my behaviour, attitude, and progress to help myself figure out any new years resolutions. Maybe I can figure out what i need to change to become the person i want to be.

So, The easiest way I can think of is to write the most notable things down each month however, I have forgotten so much of this year. All of the mundane days have faded away. Throughout the year I have had my good days and bad days. these are unavoidable.

January

At the beginning of the year, my grandmother passed away. She was a huge part of my life. she raised me since I was very young.

After her passing, I was only allowed a few days off work to grieve, while someone else in the company got over a month off to grieve for someone that passed in their family. This made me realise, this is not a company I want to keep working for. I'm sure of that.

However, I feel like I was an emotional support pillar for my family. We did become closer during this time. I was the one that broke the news to other members of the family.

I think my grandma would be proud of that if she saw me.

February

After my grandmother's funeral, I remembered all of the conversations I had with her. My dreams, goals and desires. she was always so supportive, however, for months prior I wasn't doing anything to even achieve these dreams. I wasn't saving money or teaching myself anything I needed to know.

I took a long hard look at myself. These conversations and emotions wouldn't go to waste. so I started saving and studying.

As the new year is upon me. I am proud to say, I have saved and surpassed the minimum required to move abroad. I also have been more or less consistent in my studying.

March

to be truthful I don't remember much of March. I checked my camera roll and noticed this was the month I met my online friend in Newcastle.

I showed her around the city, we had a nice time and we planned for me to visit London.

I believe around the end of this month I fucking finally opened up my TEFL courses and started working on them.

April

At the beginning of the month, I finally finished my TEFL course and was awarded a certificate. I can now teach English to people abroad.

A big victory. this made me realise... I was just heavily procrastinating. I wonder what I could do if I just put my 100% into something, because, Jesus... I think I only put about 50% on most days.

Towards the end of the month, I visited London. This was the first time I had travelled so far from home by myself. I had an amazing time and saw some great places and id love to go there again.

During May, I successfully went to the gym 10 times. it's not a lot, but it was consistent in the first half of the month. I did abandon it for a few weeks before continuing it again in May.

May

Conversations with my online friend quickly died after my trip to London. it seemed like we both lacked the interest to spend the money to visit each other again. She had her plans and I wanted to save.

June / July

for these 2 months, I honestly can't think of anything significant that happened. if something did happen then, I'm sorry about that event but.. well... be more eventful.

I continued a somewhat decent activity in the gym but it quickly fell for the coming months. Although I haven't been working out, I haven't gained a considerable amount of weight. I am currently at 76kg so at most that's a 3kg increase.

August

This year my friends didn't forget my birthday. I usually don't celebrate it because my friends are busy. However this year, I went drinking with my friends and stayed over at theirs.

I got blackout drunk.. that usually doesn't happen. I don't remember leaving the bar and my next memory is vomiting at their house.. so good night I guess.

September

Another unremarkable month. However, after a few conversations with my friend. I opened my mind to other ways to study languages and took a leaf out of his book and started online classes.

on the 15th, I had my first class with an online teacher. I was super nervous but we have had consistent classes since then and I have noticed some good improvements.

October

erm... well... I'm sure something happened. but other than studying and working. I can't remember or find anything significant that happened this month. Sorry, October.

November

I had been applying for English jobs abroad and got an interview. I was super happy! after the interview, they said to contact them if I didn't hear back within 2 weeks.

I didn't hear back for 2 weeks so I emailed them. they didn't get back to me for over a month. I didn't get the job but they were still looking for something for me as each placement came up.

Not a no, but not a yes either.

December

Christmas! the first one without my grandmother. I have to say, the grief is almost none existent now. Things that remind me of her don't bring tears or make me feel sad. I currently use the unfinished scarf she made me and I feel okay.

However, I feel like I am struggling to relate to my family's persistent emotions. I believe I kept my emotions to myself to not bother those around me, however, those around me don't try to do the same.

My grandfather and I made the Christmas dinner. the first roast dinner this year and.. fuck it was nice! too many dishes to wash but it was so good.

In regards to my studying, I have been using a website with 1000 words and I got to 420 :D.

Conclusion

Although there have been some major things this year, I don't feel like I have done many things to warrant a particular month being memorable (for good reasons). a majority of days have been mundane. although unavoidable, next year I want to make each month have something worth remembering.

I swore to myself that I wouldn't let my conversations with my grandma go to waste. And so far, I kept that promise. Not only did I start and keep studying, and finish my qualification, I got lessons, saved up enough, AND I applied for jobs. If I can be proud of anything it should be this.

I have worked for another year at my company. I'm not as bitter or angry now, but I am still resolute in my decision to leave within the next 4 months. I just need something else.

Procrastination. My biggest issue. It almost feels like general disinterest in doing things. even ones I enjoy. Currently, I'm avoiding a game I enjoy because I don't have the time to binge-play 6 hours of it in one day.

only giving 50% - I don't think I give my all to anything I do. some days I work hard at work, others I give my usual 50%. when I study I get distracted and spend way longer than I need to.

depressive episodes - I notice when I start feeling down. I become super indecisive, I stop cooking, and finding something to eat is a chore. games are less fun, I stop talking to my friends. it is much easier to just sit and let life pass me by as I stare at my computer screen watching youtube on x2 speed. even the videos I watch I don't care about. All while hating each moment because I know I can do something about it. it's just easier not to.

The resolutions

My resolutions need to be something realistic, tangible, goal orientated and something I can do consistently. Each is to tackle an issue I think I should overcome.

In no particular order

Read more - This includes audiobooks. In December I started reading the books I own. So I challenge myself to finish them all.

Study every day - there is so much to learn, keep learning. Don't stop. Languages, Coding, Marketing, Streaming, Study something.

Exercise on days off work - working out at home is still a workout. Get it done. Use the walk to the gym to listen to an audiobook.

Stop talking - I feel the need to always be talking about something at work. I don't like silence, so I need to learn to embrace it.

Give my all to things that deserve it - I need to put effort into the things that will enhance my life. Games and tv shows won't. An hour or two per day is enough.

Keep my room clean - Easy, keep it clean

Get to Japan. All this hard work has to lead somewhere.

Don't be harmless - I need to stand up for myself. listen, think, then speak and get your point across. Become an authority figure you would listen to.

Where will I be in 365 days, if I focus on completing each of these goals. I think i'd love the person i'd become.

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kuroopaisen · 3 years

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after hours || kuroo tetsurou

➵ a late night study session might just end with kuroo having a heart attack over how stupidly cute you are.

wc: 3.1k

warnings: f!reader, i guess it’s implied she’s short?, kuroo’s Dumb, i can’t stop thinking about the in-between someone get my own story out of my head please

a/n: hi i wrote this on a whim and for some reason it’s 3k i’m gonna yartz,,, kuroo brainrot let’s go! but thank you ren for beta’ing it yet again :(

the in-between m.list

“But I’m tired,” you whine, plopping your face cheek-first onto your textbook.

“We’re all tired,” Kuroo goads, shaking his head. “Come on. The more we do now, the less we have to worry about later.”

“I know,” you whine. “You don’t need to keep reminding me.”

“I wouldn’t have to remind you if you just did your work,” he grins. “We know for a fact that leaving things to the last minute makes you really stressed.”

“Maybe I work best under pressure,” you mumble. “Ever considered that?”

“I have,” he smiles. “Now you tell me: is it worth the nervous breakdown?”

“You’re cruel and I hate you.”

“We both know that’s not true.”

“Don’t put words in my mouth,” you mutter.

“I think someone’s trying to procrastinate,” he chuckles, reaching over to ruffle your hair.

“It’s late,” you groan. “I’m tired.”

“You’ve made that very clear,” he grins.

You lift your head off the textbook, glare-pouting at him. Your attempts to look intimidating rarely succeed, and this is no exception.

Kuroo can’t hold back his fond smile.

You look exhausted.

Your eyes are a little blearier than usual, shot through with red. Your hair’s a bit of a mess – not that you’ve really made an effort with it anyway – and you’ve got that dull pallor that seems to befall everyone deficient of adequate sleep.

Maybe ten forty-six in the evening was a bit late to be starting homework. And unfortunately for you, the focus for this evening is maths and chemistry.

Of course, Kuroo’s adamant that he tried to get started earlier.

(He didn’t think that the two of you would end up wasting so much of the afternoon just watching Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood, but when he’d checked the time, he’d tried to move onto studying.

You, on the other hand, had other ideas.

“Just one more episode.”

“No,” he shook his head. “We’ve got work to do.”

“But we can’t stop here,” you whined. “I wanna know what happens.”

“We’ve got to study,” he’d replied, firm and strict and resolute.

But when you’d grabbed his arm and pouted up at him, saying “Please, Tetsu?”, his resolve toppled in on itself like a poorly constructed engineering assignment made of straws.)

“Hey,” he sighs, patting you on the back. “Let’s just try to get this chapter done tonight, okay? That’s all.”

“Okay,” you mumble.

He knows it’s a bit unfair; the chapter in question is a rather long one, with far more activities in it than the average. But he trusts you to understand what needs to be done – he wouldn’t be putting you through this if it wasn’t so relevant.

He wants you to succeed. He really does. And you both know just how hard he’s been working to help you get to where you need to be.

Time and time again, you apologise for taking up so much of his time, for asking so much of him. He always smiles, saying that it’s actually good practice for him, too – and, of course, you’re managing the volleyball team.

He insists it’s a two-way street.

Not that it matters. He knows that he’d still do this for you, even if he gets nothing out of it.

He finds it too hard to say no to you, after all.

Kuroo jumps as a solid three-rap knock rattles his door.

“Are you still up, Tetsu dear?” His grandmother’s voice sounds far too amused for his liking.

“Uh, yeah,” he swallows, getting out of his chair and opening the door.

His grandmother stands in front of him, dressed in her purple silk pyjamas.

(They’re a recent birthday present that you’d chipped in a bit of money for, even though Kuroo had told you it was fine – you didn’t need to.

You’d just smiled and told him that you wanted to say a little thank you for how kind she’d been to you.

He remembers that his heart skipped a little at your smile.)

“Goodness, Tetsu, I keep forgetting just how tall you are,” his grandmother chuckles, craning her neck to get a good look at his face.

“Maybe you’re just shrinking,” Kuroo grins.

“Don’t even joke about that, my boy,” she laughs, shaking her head. “That’s a very real possibility at my age.”

She pokes her head through the doorway, catching sight of you slouched in your chair.

“You look exhausted, dear,” she smiles, tilting her head at you.

“I am,” you whine, stretching your arms over the desk. “Your grandson is a tyrant.”

“Perhaps you and Kenma should stage a coup,” she suggests, eyes twinkling. “Dethrone this despot king and free yourselves from his incessant nagging.”

“I don’t nag!”

“Oh, is that so?” her smile widens. “‘Oh, don’t forget to drink this whole bottle, Obaa-chan. It’s important to keep your fluids up – especially at your age,’” she coos, dropping her voice an octave or so in her best attempt to replicate Kuroo’s tone. “‘Oh, Obaa-chan, come take a walk with me! You’ve been sitting in front of the TV too long. Let’s get those old bones moving.’”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” Kuroo grumbles, rubbing the back of his neck, “we get the picture.”

“‘Obaa-chan! You shouldn’t be up this late! You don’t wanna wear yourself out!’” She continues, cracking a grin.

“Okay, okay!” Kuroo grouches, a sour look on his face. “Point taken!”

“I’m just teasing,” she grins. “Goodnight, Tetsu. And goodnight, dear! Don’t let him boss you around!”

“Yes ma’am!” You bark cheerfully.

She chuckles, shaking her head. But she says nothing more, ambling out the door.

Kuroo sighs.

If anything, he’s just glad she didn’t poke fun at him for having a girl in his room. Though he’s well-aware he should be grateful for the fact that he's trusted enough to not have his family snooping on him every five minutes.

Besides, being alone together in a room doesn’t mean anything. Even if…

He swallows roughly, forcing his mind to go blank.

No space for unsavoury thoughts here. None at all.

He shuts the door with a firm slam, turning back to you with his best poker face.

“So,” he hums, ambling back over to you and glancing at the textbook laid out on the desk. “What do you want to focus on?”

“Well, I think it’s time for us to talk about Pride’s true identity—”

Kuroo tsks, shaking his head. “We’ve had enough Brotherhood for one evening.”

You whine, slouching back in your chair. “Just one more episode?”

“No,” he laughs. “If we keep putting this off, we’re just going to have more to stress about later.”

“Fine,” you sigh, sticking your tongue out at him. “You’re no fun.”

“I’m starting to think hiring you on as manager was a mistake,” he grins.

“Excuse me?” You gasp, affronted.

“You’re supposed to be responsible,” he chuckles. “You know – able to make good choices and all that.”

“I do make good choices,” you glare at him. “I just hate any and everything to do with maths.”

Kuroo snorts. To be fair, he’s had the sneaking suspicion that you might be much better at chemistry if it didn’t involve so much mathematics.

“Besides,” you huff, crossing your arms, “the first years would riot.”

“You mean Lev would riot.”

“I’m sure Inuoka would stick up for me,” you say. “And you don’t want to make Shibayama sad, do you?”

“I didn’t say anything about kicking you out,” Kuroo grins, raising an eyebrow at you.

“I know,” you hum. “Just making sure you’re aware.”

Kuroo rolls his eyes playfully, flicking your forehead. “Whatever.”

The two of you settle down after that, returning to your blasted enemy.

You do fairly well, all things considered. Your focus is a bit off, but you make a good effort. And, like always, you manage to understand Kuroo’s layman explanations of things.

Of course, the two of you can’t help yourself – your study is punctuated by straying conversations that last a little longer than they should (Kuroo’s a big believer in the fifteen-five-fifteen study method, but sometimes there’s simply too much to say; a mere five minutes doesn’t cover it). Sometimes you simply demand to see Inu-chan, not budging until you’d given the Akita a good pat.

But tonight, even Kuroo tires quickly. He figures it’s probably because you started so late; something he promises himself he’ll never let happen again. Although, he’s not willing to bet money on it.

“Alright, I’m gonna go get a drink,” he sighs, stretching his arms above his head as he stands up. His interlaced fingers almost brush the ceiling. “Did you want anything?”

“I’m okay, thanks,” you sigh, putting your pencil down.

You’ve got that look on your face. The one you get when you’re faced with a particularly confusing equation or a concept you need a bit of time to wrap your head around. Kuroo knows it well; it’s usually soon followed by a quiet confession of worry and doubt.

“Hey,” he murmurs, reaching out a hand and ruffling your hair gently. “You’re doing better than you think you are.”

He wishes he could do more for you, wishes he could kick those awful feelings out of your brain. But there’s not much more he can do than this.

You look up at him with wide eyes. Your features look so gentle in the light of his desk lamp, the shadows soft and diffused. You look fond.

Kuroo tries to ignore it.

“You think so?” You pout.

“Would I lie?” He chuckles.

You peer at him closely for a moment, leaning close.

Too close.

Close enough for him to make out the intricacies of your eye colour. Close enough that he’s sure you can feel just how hot his face has become. Close enough for his mind to wander to a place it really shouldn’t.

He stands up sharply before he’s even processed what’s going on.

“I’m, uh…” He clears his throat roughly, scratching the back of his neck with one hand. “I’m gonna go get some water.”

“Okay!” You nod, smiling sweetly at him.

He doesn’t let himself linger, rushing off to the kitchen and pouring himself a tall glass of water.

He gulps the whole thing down at breakneck speed. His punishment for such hastiness is a hiccup that lurches his whole chest. Well, at least it shifted whatever weird feeling was there before.

What time is it?

He turns to the clock on the kitchen wall.

His eyes blow wide.

Twelve thirty-six. Oh, shit. He ponders, for a moment, if the clock is a few hours fast.

With a little nugget of guilt in his chest, he rushes back upstairs to his bedroom.

He opens the door slowly, not wanting to disturb the house. He slips through just as quietly, turning to say something to you.

You're lying on the desk again. But this time, your head is laid on crossed arms, your back rising and falling gently with each breath.

Kuroo’s heart feels like it might damn well shatter.

His first instinct is to pick you up and put you on his bed.

His first coherent thought is ‘what the fuck, dude?’.

He slinks towards you and places a gentle hand on your shoulder. He flushes at the contact.

What are you, twelve? He chastises himself. You’ve touched each other plenty of times before.

He immediately regrets that phrasing.

“Hey,” he murmurs, shaking your shoulder slightly. “Wake up.”

You’re motionless.

“Hey,” Kuroo whines.

“Hm?” You croak, stirring a little.

Kuroo draws back.

You lift your head and blink at him through bleary eyes.

Holy shit, he thinks. Holy fucking shit.

“It’s past midnight,” he says, ruffling your hair on instinct. Why he made the effort to yet again make physical contact with you, he doesn’t know. It’s a terrible idea, really.

“Ew,” you frown. “No.”

Kuroo shoves both his hands into the pockets of his sweatpants. There’s no risk of him doing something stupid if he does that, right?

You’re staring at your phone, your eyebrows drawn together and your lips pursed.

He knows that look.

It’s the one you always pull when he (reluctantly) calls an end to whatever you’re doing before walking you home in the evening. And he doesn’t miss how you stick a little closer to him when it’s dark, or how you always seem to glance over your shoulder at each and every peculiar sound. And he certainly doesn’t miss how you ask him to text you to let you know he’s gotten home safe.

You don’t need to tell him that you don’t want to walk all that way in the dark.

“Do you just want to stay here tonight?” He asks. He loathes himself for the weird fuzziness that churns in his gut.

You pout at him. He’s seen that face enough times to know that it means ‘please.’

“Wait here,” he smiles.

He hurries to the laundry area, rifling through his grandmother’s pile of clean clothing. There’s no way he’s going to let you sleep in your school uniform; it can’t be comfortable, and the fabric doesn’t seem breathable.

He goes through the pile once. Twice. Three times.

Nothing. There’s nothing he can lend you for the evening.

“Shit,” he mumbles, running a hand through his hair. Surely there must be—

Oh no. Oh no.

He catches sight of a plain black shirt sitting atop his pile of clean clothes. His face suddenly feels very, very hot.

It’s fine, he thinks. It’s not a big deal. My heart is not racing at the thought of her wearing one of my clothes. It’s not.

He grabs the shirt with a certain boyish carelessness, as if to prove to himself that he’s not losing his mind.

Sure, the blurry image of you wearing one of his shirts keeps trying to barge its way to the forefront of his mind, but it’s fine. It’s fine. It’s just a teenage boy thing.

He stalks back to his room with the whisper of a scowl on his face. Man, he needs to go to sleep.

As he opens the door, he catches sight of you mid-stretch. Your face is screwed up like a cat’s, nose scrunched up and eyes screwed shut.

But you’re cute. How is that cute? Why is that expression so endearing?

I’m delirious, he surmises. Probably because it’s so late.

He holds the shirt out to you with a stiff arm. “Here.”

Would you find it weird, him giving you one of his own shirts to sleep in? Would you think he’s being creepy?

You just nod as you take it from him, holding it to your chest with two hands like it’s a blanket.

Ah. So he’s overthinking it. Like an idiot.

“Did you let your family know?” He asks, trying to distract himself from his own fraying thoughts.

You nod. “I called them.”

“And they’re… fine with it?” His eyes widen slightly. Their daughter, staying over a night at a boy’s house…

“They were more angry at me for waking them up,” you pout. “But they didn’t have any problems with it.”

Kuroo’s heart swells. He’s trusted – your parents don’t mind this little arrangement. He’s not quite sure why he’s so proud, but he lets himself bask in it.

“Hey, Tetsu?”

“Hm?”

“Could I please have some water?” You mumble, rubbing one of your eyes with your knuckles.

He dashes out of the room a little quicker than he usually would – almost like his body had moved on instinct to fulfil your request.

By the time he gets back to his room, you’ve finished changing.

Kuroo’s certain he’s going to explode.

His shirt is so big on you – it’s already a bit roomy on him – grazing your lower thighs and giving him the overwhelming desire to wrap his arms around you. Your eyes are half-lidded, your cheeks puffed out a little, your hair all messy and unkempt. You look so sleepy, so cute, so—

He thrusts the glass of water towards you, cringing as the liquid sloshes dangerously close to the lip of the cup.

“Thank you,” you smile, your face lighting up as you take it from you.

Kuroo doesn’t fail to notice how your fingers brush against his as you do so.

God, he really needs to get some sleep.

“You stay in here,” he swallows, gesturing to his room.

You blink at him for a moment before realising what he means. “Wait, really?”

He nods. “I’ll just sleep on the couch.”

“No—” You’re pouting at him, misplaced guilt shining in your eyes.

“It’s fine,” Kuroo grins, ruffling your hair on reflex. He swears he zaps his fingers. “Now, you get some sleep.

“Fine,” you mumble, glare-pouting at him. “But you’ll… you’ll pay for this.”

“Will I now?” His grin broadens.

“I will,” you nod, comically resolute. “Wait, no—no, you will.”

Kuroo laughs, ruffling your hair again and reaching to—

Woah. Woah.

Where’d this sudden urge to kiss you on the forehead come from? That’s… weird.

He draws his hand back quickly. He can’t risk doing anything stupid.

“Now sleep,” he tuts, pointing you to the bed. “But don’t forget to drink your water.”

“I know,” you huff, turning around and scuttling towards the bed.

Kuroo turns around sharply, making a beeline for the door. If seeing you in his shirt was enough to make his brain go haywire, then seeing you in his bed…

He’s pretty sure he throws you a ‘good night’ before pulling the door to his room firmly shut, but he can’t be certain. He’s too busy taking a deep breath, trying to filter all the unsavoury and alarming thoughts out of his brain.

You’re his friend. He’s not supposed to want to kiss you on the forehead, to hold you in his arms. Hell, you’d probably think it was weird enough that he finds you so damn cute. And God, the thought of making you uncomfortable…

The guilt roots itself deep as he grabs himself some blankets and pillows from the laundry cupboard, dragging himself towards the couch.

He throws himself onto it face first, trying to ignore the burn running through his body. It feels like he’s on fire – and that pouty, sleepy expression of yours is scorched on the back of his eyelids.

This is normal, he reasons. He’s just a normal, hormonal teenager who likes girls. And you, a dear and beloved friend, just so happens to be a girl. This is unfortunate, but it’s fine. It doesn’t mean anything more. Right?

You’re just friends. Nothing weird going on here.

Besides, it’s not his fault. Anyone would’ve been endeared by what he’d seen tonight.

You’re just too damn cute.

Right?

#kuroo x reader #kuroo tetsurou x reader #kuroo tetsurou x you #kuroo x you #kuroo tetsuro x reader #kuroo tetsuro x you #kuro tetsuro x reader #IDK WHAT TAGS ARE ANYMORE

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ressjeon · 2 years

Text

2021 TUMBLR YEAR END REVIEW

rules ; post the top 5 works you're most proud of that you released this year (not necessarily your most popular), your top 4 current WIPs that you're excited to release in the new year, your top 3 biggest improvements in your writing over the past year, your top 2 resolutions (ways you wish to improve your writing/blog) for the new year, and your number 1 favorite line you've written this year!

tagged by these amazing people: @taegularities @amourtae @agustdakasuga @jjksblackgf @kithtaehyung @hisunshiine @playmetheclassics @spideyjimin & @jimilter (ily all 🥺💖)

5 works i’m most proud of

order up - usually i’m very slow but i was even shocked with myself how i finished this faster than usual and that’s how inspired i am? like damn? and i feel like i was able to characterize well on this fic even though i never really thought of the characters as always

in this paradise - not only that this fic reminds me of where i grew up (environment wise) but this is also the longest oneshot fic that i’ve ever written so i’m very proud ngl since i said before that i can't write a fic longer than 15k and it pained some people too so hehe ;)

down the hatches - i wrote this in less than 8 hours i think since i confused the deadline so i’m shook again with my brain when its procrastinating plus i think this is the first time that i went all out in a smut with Hobi of all people (it’s hard for me to write him before let alone write a smut for him 0.0)

sleep who? - this is the first time that i wrote something in present tense and with 3 perspectives too. it was really a struggle to balance all of them but because it was a dream of mine, it helped ig? when it comes to immersion though its only a pwp

cupid’s curse - my very first smut that was supposed to be a full ass plotted fic but turned pwp lowkey. i’m glad it turned it well even when i’ve never written any smut in my entire life until this one, y’all can tell that i’ve majored with angst prior when reading 😗

4 current WIP’s i’m excited to release

Where There’s Smoke, There’s Fire from the Warm This Winter collab - mainly because it be my life currently lmao (relationship-wise)

Jag Börjar Fatta - this was originally a JK fic but i think it would fit as a Hobi fic that i can’t wait to post during the Summer months (it’s outlined already)

Just an Illusion - whew another Jimin one inspired by a lovely “former something” of mine when i saw an ad of him 🥴

Wanna Play? - a Taehyung fic that i meant to post last year and i love how the idea’s unique hehe so i’m pumped

3 biggest improvements

i would say oml a lot when it comes to writing in general, i never thought that i would start writing and i don’t have any background on it or anything

if any of you have known me in the beginning, baby yannie was very scared to write smut and now look where we are 🤣

i think i’ve improved on a lot of stuff like i tried a lot of firsts in the past year, including venturing to other genres outside my comfort zone

2 resolutions

to not be hard on myself, i was too ambitious last year and in result, i was that strict to myself because of it

just do my pace and follow my inspirations cuz i think i can write more in that way rather than force myself to write something that i’m not inspired on atm

1 favourite line

i don’t really have one lmao i forgot what i’ve written 🤡

tagging: @sourkoo @snackhobi @btssmutgalore @opaljm @erotikkook @inkedtae @ilikemesometaetaes @rockwithwoo @sketchguk @clouditae @sugasbabiie @yutasthetic @xpeachesncream @hobisuniverse @xjoonchildx @kookingtae @randombtsprincessa @yoonia @chemicalpink @kookthief @joyfulhopelox @honeymoonjin @lavienvante @h0neypjm @aquagustd @dreamescapeswriting @miinsang @writtenwhalien @pjmsdior @triviafics @agustdealer @joonscypher @hobeemin

#moots 🥺#tag game #2021 tumblr year end review

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journalxxx · 3 years

Text

By Hook or by Crook (7)

“So! How does it look?” Toshinori asked, with a booming voice and his best hands-on-hips pose to kickstart the endeavor with a healthy dose of enthusiasm.

He wasn’t particularly successful.

“Daunting. Impossible. Like I’m gonna die of old age before I’m anywhere close to making a change.”

“A little optimism goes a long way, you know?”

“...I may not die before I’ve lugged away some of this.” Midoriya amended tentatively, scanning the extensive length of garbage-filled beach stretching before them. “And… what doesn’t kill me will make me stronger?”

“That’s the spirit!” Toshinori gave him a pat on the back, strong enough to make the boy stammer forwards. He walked around the back of the truck and started unloading the few supplies he’d brought.

“Wear these.” Toshinori threw him a pair of work gloves. He hoped he’d eyeballed the size right. “I trust you’re up to date with all your vaccines.”

“Uhm.”

“Hopefully no one’s dumping organic waste in here, but I’ll bring some traps if you see any rats. They won’t solve the problem, but it’s better than letting them scurry around freely.”

Midoriya’s eyes darted between the gloves and the beach with muted horror. “R-Rats?”

“Scared of rats?” Toshinori couldn’t help but tease. “Did I mention that I had to wade through the sewers for half an hour before finding you and the sludge villain the other day?”

Midoriya instantly looked mortified. “I-I’m sorry-”

“Not your fault! Don’t apologize!” Toshinori tossed his hands in the air. This kid desperately needed to learn the basic mechanics of humor. “I’m just saying that heroes can’t be squeamish! Rats come with the job, as well as a variety of nasty stuff and filth.”

“Right.” Midoriya followed him as Toshinori, cooler in one hand and bag of papers in the other, sat down on the last steps of the stairs. He picked an egg sandwich for himself and fished a folder out of the bag, opening it on his thighs and starting to read it.

It took him a few seconds to realize that Midoriya was still staring at him, as if awaiting further instructions.

“Well? Have at it!” Toshinori gestured widely at his new playground.

“Oh, uhm, okay.” The kid donned the gloves and took a single step towards the piles before pausing to look at Toshinori again. “I thought you wanted to ask me… stuff.”

“Yes, but I’m not sure you can handle working and talking at the same time without building up some stamina first.” Toshinori answered, eyeing the boy’s scrawny frame critically. “We’ll talk while you’ll be taking a break to catch a breather, which is probably going to happen sooner rather than later.”

“Oh… All right.” Midoriya turned away, his arms hanging limply from hunched shoulders as he muttered to himself. “...Where do I even start...?”

“From the small things. Working your way up to the heavier objects.” Toshinori explained patiently, then gave him a pointed look. “I get the feeling you’re procrastinating.”

The boy approached the closest stack… and did nothing. Was he ever going to stop waffling and get cracking? “Meanwhile, you’ll just, uh… do your own thing?”

“Surely you don’t need me to guide you through the elaborate process of moving objects from point A to point B, do you?” Maybe the kid detected the hint of annoyance in Toshinori’s voice, because he finally, finally set to grab the closest piece of junk- “...Oh. Okay, that’s not a great start.”

“What?” Midoriya stopped halfway through picking up what was probably the first electric fan ever invented, all the way back in the Iron Age. “I haven’t even done anything yet!”

“Bend your knees, not your back. Otherwise you’re going to- do you really not know this? Isn’t the correct way to lift weights Household Chores 101?”

“Oh, right, I know.” Midoriya rearranged his stance in a way that was less likely to earn him a slipped disk within the next two hours. “Do people really lift things like this though? It’s… a lot harder than the normal way.”

“For your legs, yes. For your back, no. You’ll thank me when you’ll be old enough to realize you aren’t made out of rubber.”

Toshinori munched slowly while he watched the kid carry his first loads to the truck. That act alone seemed to distract Midoriya to an amusing degree, his gaze often flicking to meet Toshinori’s eyes for just a moment before shooting back in front of him with blatant self-consciousness. Toshinori allowed the boy a few minutes of warm-up, just the time for him to finish his sandwich and sip a small cup of apple juice, before deciding to kick things into proper gear.

“Running from the truck to the heaps and vice versa would help you gain some endurance too, rather than leisurely strolling back and forth.” Toshinori commented as Midoriya walked past him.

The kid stopped in his tracks and regarded him with a mix of horror and aversion that vaguely reminded him of death-row inmates when faced with their executioners.

“What?” Toshinori went on, unperturbed. “Are you expecting to get fit without getting tired?”

“No, of course not-”

“Besides, you’ll need to keep a swift pace if you want to clear the whole beach before the admission exam.”

“Wha- All of it?! Before the…” Midoriya sputtered, arms wrapping more tightly around the broken chair he was holding as if that was supporting him instead of the other way around. “Y-You never said…”

“But of course! They don’t do things by half measures in U.A., so why should you?” Toshinori grinned. “Plus Ultra, am I right?”

Midoriya let out an incredulous chuckle. “You’re kidding, right? There’s no way I can do something like that...”

“Depends on how much elbow grease you’re willing to put into it.”

Midoriya’s expression shifted minutely as he caught onto Toshinori’s seriousness. “But… but that’s impossible! No matter how hard I work, I can’t- I can’t move stuff like that!” He griped, pointing at the wrecked husk of a van half-buried under a mound of assorted refuse. “Even if I do my best-”

“And pray tell, what’s your best?” Toshinori stood up and walked to the kid, ditching the whimsical demeanor. If playful cajoling wasn’t enough to stir him, maybe it was time to bust out the big guns. “What’s the heaviest you can lift? The fastest you can run? The hardest you can push yourself? When’s the last time you actually tried your very best, and how did it fall short?”

Toshinori was already well and truly spent for the day, but he let the provocation and drive in his words stoke the fire within him, and it flared. The Symbol of Peace broke out of his diminutive shell among dramatic wisps of steam, ready to bestow his wisdom more effectively than his rickety counterpart ever could.

“Do you know what’s the only way to gauge your limits? Reaching them. And the only way to get stronger?“ Toshinori held out his arm between them, and clenched his fist resolutely. He relished the sensation of unyielding muscles tensing and bulging under his skin, tangible proof of the truth of his assertions. “Gritting your teeth and smashing past them! Little by little, but constantly!”

Midoriya had only witnessed that transformation once, poorly and by accident, and it showed. The chair had slipped from his hands without him even noticing, and now lay forgotten at his feet on the bare sand. The kid was gawking at him with wide eyes and mouth agape, the very picture of spellbound rapture. It was far from an unfamiliar reaction from whoever was graced by the Symbol of Peace’s presence, and yet it was still flattering, every time.

“You’ll never improve if you keep dwelling on what you think you can do now. Focus on what you want to do next. Visualize it as a clear goal. Build an image out of it, and then carve it in reality. If you really want that van to move, then it will move. If you really want this beach to be clear, then it will be. But you have to put your back, sweat and heart into making it happen!”

All Might captivated his one-man audience with the usual effortlessness, boisterous showmanship and honest positivity deeply intertwined in a way that boggled his detractors’ minds, but that felt so natural and appropriate to Toshinori. He’d made an art out of it, down to the rumble of his voice and the firmness of his gestures and the levity of his attitude, the art of highlighting and displaying the very best parts of himself so that they could resonate louder, better, brighter.

“So what will it be, young Midoriya? Will you clean up this place within the next ten months or not?”

“Y-Yes. I will.” That had done the trick. It was obvious from the way Midoriya’s back straightened and his expression toughened. It was obvious from the spark kindled in his eyes, a reflection of Toshinori’s own passion, still lacking in heat but full of potential.

“Then you’d better get down to it!” The hero sealed the deal with a radiant smile and a thumbs up. “Time’s a-wastin’!”

“Yes, sir!” Midoriya picked up the chair and dashed towards the truck to unload it there, then he immediately bounced back down the stairs and towards the nearest heap of waste. Toshinori observed the boy’s next rounds with his unwavering smile and few approving nods that kept the kid a bit lighter on his feet.

How much easier it was for All Might to touch people’s hearts. How much easier to inspire, to reassure, to nurture. How much easier everything was for All Might, really. If only that shining beacon of hope wasn’t shackled by the whims of a withering body, how much richer society at large would be for it.

Toshinori let out a deep exhale that took more than just air out of him, and the flame settled down to a low glow. He couldn’t hold back a few wet coughs, and he promptly turned his shrunken back on Midoriya’s concerned glance to sit back on the cool steps.

Unfortunately, there was a lot more than motivation to strength training. Right off the bat, Toshinori could tell that Midoriya wasn’t going to last twenty full minutes of workout. He honestly didn’t know that an ostensibly healthy individual could reach the ripe age of fourteen with such poor body awareness. The boy had coordination and balance on par with a toddler’s: he stumbled on his feet, he tripped on sand, he nearly fell off the stairs twice before realizing that trying to climb them while his view was obstructed by the very items he was carrying might be a less than optimal solution. He seemed to be unaware of the existence of entire muscle groups, and Toshinori had to physically get up and mime movements for him to understand how to exert force more efficiently. Not to mention that he needed incessant needling lest his sprints quickly devolved into lax jogs.

This whole training thing was going to be… an interesting experience, Toshinori could already tell.

Exactly sixteen and a half minutes later, the boy all but collapsed on the stairs beside Toshinori, gasping for air and wiping his forehead on his sleeve.

“B-Break?” He pleaded, quite redundantly.

Toshinori took pity on his plight and pushed the cooler in his direction. “Have a drink.”

“Oh, thank you…” The lack of polite refusal made Toshinori suspect that Midoriya had forgotten to bring his own water.

“There’s sports drinks and fruit juice in there too. Save the snacks for after you’re finished, food and heavy workouts don’t always agree with each other.” Toshinori had packed food primarily for himself, expecting their after-school meeting to last long enough for him to slot in one or two meals in the meantime, but he had taken care of adding a few extras for the kid. A good idea, because the possibility of Midoriya face planting on the ground halfway through out of sheer exhaustion seemed more and more likely by the minute.

“Thank you, you didn’t have to…”

“I promised bribes, didn’t I?”

Midoriya flashed him the tiniest smile, and eagerly drank some water while Toshinori retrieved a small journal and a pen from the other bag. He skimmed through the list of preliminary topics he’d scribbled on the first page under Tsukauchi’s advice, wondering which one he should tackle first.

“All right.” Deciding to follow his instinct in spite of basic common sense, Toshinori decided to begin from the end. “These phone calls of yours. Give me an idea of what they’re like. The last one you had with your father was on April 1st, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Tell me about it. Everything you talked about, as precisely as you can remember it.”

The good thing was that Midoriya’s memory was very accurate, and he was able to recall the whole conversation basically step by step. The less good thing was that said conversation was largely commonplace and unremarkable, consisting of very ordinary small talk and inquiries about school, grades, news, local events-

“Quirks?”

“Mh-hm.” The boy nodded. “We always end up talking about quirks, in one way or another. Quirks and heroes. It’s always been… a common interest.”

“Always, uh?”

“Yeah, we’ve been doing it since… forever, really. I’ve always found quirks fascinating, and he has lots of great insight to offer.”

“I can imagine...” Toshinori mumbled. Asking who had initiated that habit was probably pointless, it sounded like it had started too early in the boy’s life for him to remember - or even to understand if he had been deliberately led to develop that interest. Some intriguing nature-versus-nurture speculations could be made on the matter, but they weren’t likely to aid Tsukauchi’s case. “And in what way do you talk about them?”

“We… analyze them, discuss them. What is known for sure about a certain quirk, what can be deduced from footage and descriptions of its use, what its unmentioned limitations might be, how it could be further developed… You saw my notebook, right? Basically the kind of stuff that’s in there.”

“Wait.” Toshinori blinked. Could he have already stumbled into a treasure trove of All For One-certified information? “You mean that all that’s written in that notebook was dictated by your father?”

The kid almost choked on his next gulp of water, and shot Toshinori an almost offended look. “No! No, no, it’s all stuff I found out on my own! Well, almost all of it, there are some additions of his here and there, but… Uh, I’d say at least 90% of it is mine, and 10% of it is his… Actually, more like 95% and 5%-”

Well, that sounded less promising, but it was still a lead. “So he’s been basically teaching you how to conduct your own quirk analyses?”

“Well, I wouldn’t say teaching. I wish our school teachers were that engaging...” Midoriya let out a small sigh. “But I guess we do go about it a little like with school essays. Research, deadline, discussion and all that…”

“Pardon?”

“Well, every month we decide which heroes or quirks we’re going to talk about the next time - back in March we chose Hawks, Kido and Snatch for last month’s call, for example. During the rest of the month we gather information and draw our conclusions, and then we compare them during the next chat.”

“You’ve got quite the well-oiled routine going on there, haven’t you?”

“Actually, I think it’s just to give me a chance to make my own deductions with a clear head instead of on the fly.” Midoriya scratched said tousled head in embarrassment. “I bet he doesn’t even need to do any research, he’s always on the top of his game. I’ve never been able to, uh… one-up him, you know? He always knows what I’m driving at, and somehow he always brings my hypotheses two or three steps further than where I stop.”

Toshinori answered with a non-committal hum. No surprise there, the man was a living quirk storeroom complete with its own self-congratulatory, sentient database. “You don’t seem too bothered by it though.”

“Oh, I’m not. It’s not like he’s ever… disappointed or angry or anything, even if I don’t get stuff. He just enjoys chatting, I guess.” That he surely did, Toshinori grimly thought. Way too much. “And I do too. It’s kind of like a game. Or a challenge.”

“A challenge?”

“Yeah, uh… How can I explain…?” The boy drummed his fingers on the bottle as he collected his thoughts. “Okay, for example: one of the first things dad asked me about Hawks was what shape his wings are, and what I could deduce from that about his flight capabilities. Which was a trick question! I knew it as soon as I heard it, because I’d already figured out the real answer during my research.”

“Ah.” Toshinori blinked. “And… how is that a trick question, exactly?”

“Because Hawks doesn’t actually fly! Not like a bird, at least, so his wing shape doesn’t matter!” Midoriya beamed, and suddenly Toshinori realized that that was the first real, genuine, enthusiastic smile the boy had given him since they’d met. And, without exaggeration, not crying, panicking or grimacing made him look almost like an entirely different person. “He simply can’t! Humans can’t fly even if you stick a pair of wings to them, they’re just too heavy! Other heroes who can fly properly are mostly transformers, like Ryukyu - their whole bodies change when they shift, bone structure and all - but Hawks’ body is entirely human if you exclude his wings.”

Midoriya reached for his backpack and drew out the same charred notebook Toshinori had signed days earlier. An item so vital to the kid’s daily life that he always had it with him, apparently, even more essential than beverages during a workout session. A peculiar, if questionable, trait.

“What Hawks actually does isn’t flying, it’s levitating!” The kid held the notebook open before Toshinori’s eyes on a spread page dedicated to the hero in question. “He uses the second facet of his quirk, the telekinesis that allows him to control his feathers singularly! That also explains his incredible speed, which is completely unjustifiable if you only take into account normal bird flight aerodynamics. His propulsion is powered by his feathers - and each of them is quite speedy and powerful on its own, so it stands to reason that he would be lightning-fast when his wings contain so many of them pushing him in unison!”

Toshinori politely elected to wait for the onslaught of words to subside on its own, although he already suspected that it was a little like standing right under a waterfall and waiting for someone higher up to turn off the faucet.

“That said, that doesn’t explain everything about his quirk… For example, a single feather of his is capable of lifting and transporting an adult person, that has been extensively documented. Yet, he loses the ability to levitate relatively soon after dispatching too many of them - he becomes unable to float even when he still has at least several dozens of them attached to his body. We couldn’t figure out why that happens with the information we have. Maybe it’s harder for him to apply his power to himself, that is often the case for emitters. Maybe it messes with his proprioception, and he can’t control the feathers he hasn’t detached as finely as all the others��”

If there was one thing Toshinori was absolutely certain of at this point, it was that the kid wasn’t short on breath any more. “And this is the part you inferred on your own.”

“Yep! And dad agreed with all of it!” Midoriya’s smile grew even wider. It was astonishing how much it didn’t look like dad’s deranged, shark-like, nightmare-inducing sneer, and Toshinori could only send a quiet thanks to the heavens for that. “This is all guesswork though. Do you… by any chance, do you know if we were on the right track? I’d be really curious to know…”

“Ah, I can’t help you there, kid.” Toshinori felt suddenly on the spot. “I’m not acquainted with Hawks, nor do I know more about his quirk than the average person.”

“Oh, I thought… Since you’re both- I mean, I thought All Might may have met him during the billboard chart events, what with them both being in the top ten.”

“We passed by each other, yes, but we were never properly introduced. He wasn’t particularly interested in rubbing elbows with the old guard, I suppose.”

“Oh. Well, that’s his loss, for sure.” Midoriya, funnily enough, pouted. “Pity, I was wondering… Even if he doesn’t fly, he does flap his wings in a way that resembles a bird’s. I wonder if that’s intentional, to mislead opponents and prevent them from figuring out how he actually moves. Or maybe he does it subconsciously…”

“I’m afraid I really don’t know…” Toshinori had never met Hawks on the field either, it wasn’t common for accidents to require more than a single big-name hero to intervene these days. Especially if one of them was the number one, who often showed up first and invariably solved any incident in mere minutes-

Toshinori suddenly came back to himself and almost facepalmed in frustration. Why was he letting himself be interrogated about completely irrelevant hero trivia? He was the one asking questions! God, he was bad at this. “And your father had nothing to contribute about all this?”

“Not about this specifically, but he did raise a point I hadn’t considered.” Midoriya looked up at the sky, once again lost in his very wordy, very deep lucubrations. “Hawks has an astonishing control on his quirk. He can use his telekinesis to move hundreds of feathers at once, to sense his surroundings, he can even harden them and turn them into weapons. He made Fierce Wings into an incredibly versatile ability, and he’s so young too… And yet, there’s no record of him attending any hero school or training facility in Japan, nor abroad. He claims to be self-taught, but… admittedly, it is hard to believe. One would think he must have had some excellent education and tutoring to make it into the top ten when he was only eighteen…”

Toshinori didn’t reply. Midoriya looked back at him when the silence stretched, and whatever he spied on Toshinori’s face made him immediately backpedal. “I-I mean, it’s odd, but, uh… not suspicious per se, nor a sign of anything… weird or bad about him. There are many heroes who, ehr, prefer to keep their personal history private, especially geniuses, and that’s fine! They have all the right to! Same goes for their quirks, it makes total sense-”

Toshinori massaged his left temple slowly. Right, better just nip this topic in the bud before it got irredeemably out of hand.

He peered again at the notebook in Midoriya’s hands. So All For One had been imparting occasional, amicable quirk analysis lessons to the kid for a good decade, which sounded suspiciously like the kind of knowledge a potential underling or successor might use. On the other hand, Toshinori could think of a million other ways for the Symbol of Fear to instil skills in his son - all of them remarkably more efficient, safe, manageable and ruthless. The whole thing was contradictory in a way that didn’t sit right with Toshinori.

“Mind if I take another look at that?” Toshinori had been in a bit of a rush the first time round, and he’d only taken a cursory glance at the contents of Midoriya’s notes. But if there was a chance of those pages containing words uttered by All For One himself, a more thorough examination was in order.

“Not at all! But, uh…” Midoriya was fast to hand out the item, but his eagerness to assist was even faster to dampen. “Are you going to retain this as evidence too?”

“Mh, I don’t think that will be necessary...” Right, the poor kid’s house had probably been ransacked even further after Toshinori and Tsukauchi’s first pass. No wonder he was worried about losing this prized possession too. “But if it will be, I can make a copy of it for you to keep, so you won’t lose all your, uh, data.”

“Oh, thanks! That would be great!” The kid perked up instantly. He was so easy to please. “Although… I guess I should make a copy of it myself anyway. It’s already kind of… unrecoverable. I could detach the pages with All Might’s sign and preserve those separately, and just photocopy everything else…”

Toshinori’s imagination mercilessly supplied him with the picture of a new addition to Midoriya’s bedroom decor, his five-second poorly-made signature hung to a wall in an elegant frame. He repressed a groan, deliberately neglected to point out that he could simply provide as many new authentic signs as needed, and directed his attention back to the scorched edges of the notebook. “Right… What happened to this thing, anyway? Did someone put it in a toaster?”

Midoriya let out a totally not nervous chuckle as he wrung his hands in a totally not nervous fashion. “Oh, uhm... You know…” Toshinori didn’t, actually, but the kid didn’t elaborate either.

Well, he was allowed to have a modicum of privacy, still. Toshinori let the issue drop, and nudged the boy with his foot. “You seem well rested. Back to the trash you go.”

Midoriya shuffled to his feet less than enthusiastically, and resumed toiling away at his task. While still checking on him often, ready to poke and prod at the first hint of sluggishness, Toshinori browsed through the kid’s notebook. While the contents were indeed worthy of attention, they were scarce in quantity. It must be rather new, since less than a quarter of the pages had been filled. However, the promise of more material to be discovered made Toshinori withhold his judgement on the matter for the time being.

Once that was done, he continued his perusal of the few files Tsukauchi had already put together about the Midoriya case. Toshinori had practically begged his friend to let him have an active role, any active role in the case: he simply couldn’t bear to twiddle his thumbs until someone else kindly pointed him to All For One’s hideout for another overdue thrashing. He simply needed to be involved, or he’d probably start crawling up walls within a week.

Questioning the kid was pretty much the only suitable occupation for him, currently… Well, it was either that or questioning Mrs. Midoriya, and Toshinori was fairly sure that his brain would leak out of his ears if he heard any more details about All For One’s romantic escapades. He wasn’t exactly an expert when it came to investigative work, not by any stretch of the imagination, but he was going to spare no effort to earn some results. If that meant poring over reams of police reports in the hopes of spotting some helpful clue, so be it. At least it would keep him busy, and busy was good, especially in trying times.

He’d applied the same logic to Midoriya, in a sense. The boy seemed the kind of person who’d very easily overthink himself into a negative spiral, even in less dire circumstances than the messy family drama he’d found himself into. It would do him good to focus on a better future, rather than on his depressing present. Giving him a goal to set his sights on would keep him going more smoothly.

At first Toshinori had thought to motivate him towards his dream career, but it turned out that the boy’s strategy about the admission test was… nebulous at best. Not that he could truly blame him for it: fourteen-year-old Toshinori didn’t exactly have a multi-step plan towards becoming the Symbol of Peace either, one couldn’t help being somewhat scatterbrained at that age.

The illegal dumping site had been a serendipitous discovery, and cleaning it up was the perfect type of goal to incite the boy towards. It was very obvious and straightforward, and required no intricate planning: he simply needed to roll up his sleeves and buckle down. And the muscle he’d build while doing it would serve him well for heroic purposes too, so it was a win-win on all fronts. Not to mention that some good old physical exertion would help him sleep at night, which he was still struggling with, if the persistent bags under his eyes were of any indication. Toshinori dearly missed the times when that trick still worked on him too, when driving himself to the brink of exhaustion was a guaranteed one-way ticket to restful and regenerative dreamland. Nowadays, if he accumulated even a sliver of excessive fatigue, all he got was… well, fatigue. And a metric ton of unrelenting body pains and lasting debilitation.

The rest of the afternoon went by smoothly and unremarkably. Midoriya drudged through many rounds of garbage disposal with decreasing energy and verve, but that was to be expected. Toshinori collected more barely relevant and generally useless information, but that was to be expected too. They were both in for the long haul, there was no point in getting upset about it. Eventually the sun started to set, and Toshinori beckoned the boy back to him with a handwave.

“You have more of these?” Toshinori said, tapping his index on the big 13 on the cover of the notebook still on his lap.

“Uh, yeah.”

“Could you bring them with you next time?”

“All of them?” Midoriya seemed frazzled.

“If you still have them, yes. Would that be a problem?”

The boy scratched his head as his cheek reddened slightly. “N-No, not a problem, but some of them are really… I finished the first one when I was seven. They aren't just outdated, they’re… ehr, childish. Just doodles and misspelled ramblings.”

“Don’t worry, it’s not like I’ll be grading them.” Not yet, at least. Toshinori smirked at his own private joke. Maybe he should grade them, as a small practice run. “I just want to give a quick read to a few things here and there.”

“O-Okay…”

“Good. Well, I think we can call it a day.” Toshinori rummaged in his cooler to fetch a chocolate energy bar, and tossed it to the exhausted boy. “Catch.”

Despite the warning, Midoriya did not catch, and the snack bumped against his chest and fell to the ground with a sad clack. Reflexes were MIA too, apparently. What a rare specimen of a prospective hero Toshinori had crossed paths with.

“T-Thank you!” Midoriya immediately picked it up, unwrapped it and shoved it into his mouth as he hopped into the passenger seat of the truck. Whether it was real hunger or fear of passing as rude, Toshinori couldn’t tell.

The drive to Midoriya’s house was brief. The boy was too tired to chat - as if they hadn’t already had their fill for the day. When they arrived and Midoriya climbed out of the vehicle to be on his way, Toshinori finally addressed one last pressing issue.

“Tomorrow your father is going to call you.”

“Yeah.” The kid’s eyes dropped to the ground. Maybe Toshinori should have brought it up sooner. Way to end the meeting on a sour note.

“How are you going to handle that?”

“I’m not.” The boy shrugged. “Mom will tell him I just got my tonsils removed. It's… safer for now. I think.”

Toshinori nodded. “Let’s take a day off then. Even if you can’t speak, he might want to say something to you, and it would be strange for you not to be at home while recovering.”

“Okay.”

He looked so very small, and so very young like that, bathed in the warm hues of sunset, but with no real warmth to his eyes and demeanor. He was too small and too young to be dealing with this shit. No one was old or big enough to deal with any of All For One’s shit, really. Toshinori would have to make sure no one would have to ever again.

“Thank you for your help today. It’s very appreciated, believe me.” Toshinori offered, with his most sincere smile. “Feel free to text me or Tsukauchi if anything comes up, you should be able to reach at least one of us at any hour of day or night.”

“Okay. Thank you. Have a good evening.”

“You too, kid.” Toshinori watched him until the door of his house closed behind his back, then he drove off.

#my hero academia #boku no hero academia #deku #izuku midoriya #All Might #Toshinori Yagi

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jackoshadows · 3 years

Text

@nymerias-heart suggested a while back that we do some TWoW speculation while waiting for the next book.

So I was wondering if ASoIaF readers on here could reblog the character list below with the chapter count they think each character would get in The Winds of Winter. Would be really interesting to see this. If we have enough data we could do some statistics.

ADwD was already a big book with 16 POVs and 73 chapters. Jon had the maximum with 13 and several characters had 1 or 2 chapters. In TWoW, GRRM has to fit in 20 POV characters and cover a lot of ground and story. And we only have two books left to finish the story.

The list is below. Just enter the number of chapters next to character names. You can also enter 0, if you don’t think the character will have a POV chapter.

I’ll go first.

Aeron Greyjoy... 3

Areo Hotah ...2

Arianne Martell ... 3

Arya Stark ...8

Asha Greyjoy ...3

Barristan Selmy ...4

Bran Stark ...8

Brienne of Tarth ...3

Cersei Lannister ...6

Daenerys Targaryen ...7

Davos Seaworth ...4

Jaime Lannister ...3

Jon Snow ...3

Jon Connington ...3

Melisandre ...4

Samwell Tarly ..3

Sansa Stark ...4

Theon Greyjoy ...5

Tyrion Lannister ...7

Victarion Greyjoy ...3

POV chapter count: 86

Prologue: GRRM has mentioned that we will see Jeyne Westerling. Which means this will be in the Westerlands. We may see Edmure Tully and possibly the Blackfish through this prologue.

Epilogue: The Wall and the arrival of the Others.

Location wise split of above chapters:

Essos/Vaes Dothrak/Meereen/Yunkai/Dany landing in Westeros: 21

The North: 12

Braavos/Arya in Westeros: 8

Beyond the Wall: 8

The Wall: 7

Stormlands/Young Griff’s campaign to KL: 6

King’s Landing: 6

Riverlands: 6

Oldtown: 6

Vale: 4

Dorne:2

Total: 88 chapters up from the 73 chapters in ADwD. The chapters could be of shorter length though, if GRRM cuts down on descriptions of feasts and travelogues. This is where his editor could massively help and GRRM has mentioned going back and tweaking things. For example, that Arianne sample chapter from TWoW would have her get to Young Griff instead of spending two chapters just traveling.

If we look at word counts:

A Game of Thrones: 4082 words per chapter (298k in 73 chapters)

A Clash of Kings: 4657 (326k in 70 chapters)

A Storm of Swords: 5171 (424k in 82 chapters)

A Feast for Crows: 6522 (300k in 46 chapters)

A Dance with Dragons: 5781 words per chapter (422k in 73 chapters)

He needs to go back to AGoT chapter lengths and then perhaps the limitations of book binding would not be a problem.

Here is also a link to confirmed POV chapters in TWoW. But note that this may have changed since GRRM did state in a recent notablog post that he was going back and changing things - combining chapters, splitting them, rewriting them etc.

Arya: 4

Tyrion: 3

Barristan: 3

Arianne: 3

Melisandre: 2

Theon: 2

Aeron: 2

Areo Hotah: 2

Cersei: 2

Asha: 2

Jon Connington: 2

Sansa: 1

Victarion: 1

Bran: 1

Daenerys: 1

Davos: 1

Confirmed Chapters: 33

Below the cut I have put in some of my reasoning for my POV counts.

First, I think GRRM needs to refocus on his main story and characters and make his way to the ending. That means more focus on main characters and less time spend on secondary characters. He should be spending time getting Arya, Bran, Jon, Dany and Tyrion etc. to their endgames rather than spend more time world building and telling the stories of secondary characters.

For example, Bran had like 3 chapters in Feast and Dance while Brienne got 8! Who is the more important character here? There are two books left, Bran has to finish training, find out stuff about the Others, explore lands of always winter, return south of the wall, meet back up with Jon and Arya, play a big part in defeating the Others and become King.

GRRM has written material for an entire book with Arya in Braavos. Unfortunately ASoIaF is not about Arya’s FM adventures in Braavos and Arya needs to get back to Westeros. So George has chop, cut, edit and narrow down her story there to like maybe 5 chapters before she leaves.

So either George cuts out a lot of the fat, travelogues, world building and secondary characters or he needs 8/9 books to finish or he can change his endings to suit what he has written now or he can procrastinate and just not write.

Some of the things GRRM has said regarding TWoW.

GRRM teases about events in TWOW in this interview

“I think we’re gonna start out with a big smash with the two enormous battles,” Martin says. Presumably one of those battles refers to the clash between Ramsay’s army and Stannis’s forces in the North (the outcome of which was described in Ramsay’s letter in ADWD—perhaps falsely?—but not actively shown), while the other takes place across the narrow sea when Yunkai attacks Meereen in an attempt to overthrow Daenerys. In addition, Martin says, “We have more deaths, and we have more betrayals. We have more marriages.” Let the speculation begin. As he’s noted before, Martin says the Dothraki are coming back into the story (“in a big way”), and he says “a lot of stuff is happening at The Wall.”

From his Notablog updates:

06/23/2020

Of late I have been visiting with Cersei, Asha, Tyrion, Ser Barristan, and Areo Hotah. I will be dropping back into Braavos next week. Now you will have to excuse me. Arya is calling. I think she means to kill someone.

08/11/2020

Of late I have been spending a lot of time with the Lannisters. Cersei and Tyrion in particular. I’ve also paid a visit to Dorne, and dropped in to Oldtown a time or three. In addition to turning out new chapters, I’ve been revising some old ones (some very old)… including, yes, some stuff I read at cons ages ago, or even posted online as samples. I tweak stuff constantly, and sometimes go beyond tweaking, moving things around, combining chapters, breaking chapters in two, reordering stuff.

08/15/2020

For the nonce, it is what it is. My life is at home, on hold, and I am spending the days in Westeros with my pals Mel and Sam and Vic and Ty. And that girl with no name, over there in Braavos.

Now, there are three things that GRRM just has to get done in TWoW, IMO.

Daenerys Targaryen has to resolve her Essos plot and get to Westeros by the end of TWoW.

Arya has to resolve her Braavos plot and get to Westeros

Bran has to advance a great deal in his plot/Bloodraven/Others etc.

(Note: I suspect this is one of the reasons that TWoW is taking so long. By his own admission, Dany and Bran are the two characters GRRM finds hardest to write and my speculation is that there is a lot of these two characters in the next book.)

So I am going to assign Arya and Bran the most POV chapters - let’s say 8 each since they are the only POVs at their locations. The Essos plot is a complicated mess, but we have other POVs focused on there as well - Tyrion, Barristan and Victarion. And Tyrion will no doubt get a good chunk of chapters because GRRM likes to write for him and finds it easy to write for him.

For Oldtown I am assigning 6 chapters - 3 from Sam’s POV and 3 from Aeron giving us a look into what Euron is upto. Or it could be 4 for Sam and 2 for Aeron.

I suspect not much happening in Dorne until they align with Young Griff. Arianne and Jon Connington with a look into fAegon’s campaign advancing into KL. Some Vale stuff with Sansa and LF.

GRRM mentions spending a lot of time with Cersei and Tyrion. Cersei remains the only POV in KL and that’s an important location. Jaime and Brienne are together so GRRM can use either of them for Lady Stoneheart/the Brotherhood/Riverlands.

Lots happening at the wall. Big battles in the North and the resolution of the Northern plot - Theon/Asha with Stannis and Davos with Rickon/Northerners. I am not sure if Jon will get a POV - so I am giving him just 3 in case. I think the majority viewpoint will be Mel.

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thebadchoicemachine · 3 years

Text

Despair Suits Ultimate Run-Through

Okay this has been sitting in my drafts for months I’m just posting it because all my drafts are stressing me out.

Wilbur - Ultimate “Guitarist” / Ultimate Distortion (despair)

- He’s the least true despair oriented out of the family. He loves messing with other people but doesn’t enjoy despair himself, something nobody including himself really realizes until Tommy is dead and he’s pissed because it’s not fun when HE’s the one mourning.

- He works with twisting perceptions and rules against people, there is no true good and all that. You do something nice? Well actually you see it’s cause so much more despair here etc etc..

Tommy - Ultimate “Playmate” / Ultimate Pawn (despair)

- Really just a brainwashed kid hyped up on death and despair because it’s what his family is built off of. He holds it to a religious degree and takes it very seriously.

- He’s the most like Junko out of the despair family, the rules of the game are sacred to him otherwise it’s no fun. He really does his own thing so long as it’s within the goals others have set for him to accomplish. His role is mostly fulfilling other’s plans. He simultaneously has the most and least freedom out of the despair grip, being able to function however pleases so long as he fulfills his task but he is completely obligated to fulfill all and any such tasks.

Tubbo - Ultimate Hazard / Ultimate Hope

- Much like Tommy he’s really just a brain washed kid who is drunk on despair because it’s what his friends do and it’s all he’s ever known.

- Helps him realize the reaason he stuck it out so long was becuase he already had jope, belief and drive that things would be better

Ranboo - Ultimate Journalist (main character)

- He is a journalist. He tries bis very hardest to be objective while still remaining compassionate and driven.Honestlyy he never intended to become a journalist. He started keeping notes to help himself and ended up submitting one for a school project he procrastinated on. Turns out he’s an excellent story teller as well as truthful, it won a contest and was featured in a paper and before he knew it he was writing for big news full time.

- He doesn’t even accept a lot of pay. His main and constant condition is, so long as everything is factual, his words not he twisted.

Niki - Ultimate “Baker” / Ultimate Agent

- She was already in the habit of not being upfront with her ultimite so as to be able to just get to know people first. She can work much easier when people don’t think they’re being worked at, if they knew they were going against an ultimate they become eager to prove it wrong so she went by “Ultimate Baker” for most of her life.

- As the Ultimate Agent she is extremely good at conflict resolution and always able to get some kind of goodness through her advocating. Ever since she was a child she found herself to be the only one who stood up for victims. She is very multi-talanted as it takes different things to get different people to listen. The skills she’s built up include a BS detector that’s off the charts, being genuinely one of the friendliest people you’ll ever meet, and being able to kick your ass seven ways to sunday.

Puffy - Ultimate Pirate

Schlatt - Ultimate Tycoon

- Tubbo convinces Puffy Schlatt is going to kill him. Schlatt has actually been very kind and mentor-y to Tubbo. He’s a good fit because his gruff additude isn’t too jarring for despair-washed child to dismiss but he is genuinely helpful at heart. He wants everyone to be safe.

- Tubbo is unerved by this shift in views happening to him and half-truthfully vents his feelings of unsafeness to Puffy, who posiosn him.

Hannah - Ultimate Florist

- Famous for growing the best flower garden in the whole country alll by herself, she has a strict rule about anyone else interfering with her plants. Also, generally a plant expert. Knows a lot more than just flowers. She’s strong as hell (maintaining one of the most revered gardens in the whole world by yourself involves a lot of running and lifting) and can also find the perfect blend of colors, smells, and meanings

Jackstanifold - Ultimate Determination

- I love the idea of more abstract talents! Like, “Ultimate Moral Compass” sounds really unique but he was actually more like “Ultimate Hall Monitor.”

- He got picked on by adults and other kids alike for not having an “applicable” talent. Determination isn’t like being a Ultimate Baseball Star or Ultimate

Fundy - Ultimate Game Designer

- Has several popular games under his belt.

Sam - Ultimate Guard

- Actually, he hates his ultimate. He’s strong and scary and can keep people in check sure but he’s also hella fucking smart as well kind and just wants people to be safe and happy. He wished people didn’t focus so much on his enforcement and more on his protecting.

Purpled - Ultimate Astronomer

- Actually spends most of his time playing sports, he’s very athletic and wanted to play something professionally but his knack for the stars kind of dragged him away. He doesn’t mind too much though, he really does love space!

Quackity- Ultimate Rogue

- It’s like he’s trying to be a Troublemaker™ (like Celest) but ends up more a Fuyuhiko. Albeit without the depressing jumpstart to his turn into genuinely wanting to help. It’s more of a slow burn.

Charlie - Ultimate Forensic Chemist

- Acts as their detective/doctor character

- He’s in like an uncanny valley of a mad scientist and just some friendly dude. Sure, he experiments plenty (to the point it’s questioned why he’s forensic specifically or chemist specifically) but his speciality as an actual successful sciencest is in forensics chemist.

Karl - Ultimate Astrologer

- Sort of works like Angie but less... awful. He’s more genuine and happy and understands other’s opinions and skepticism.

- Honestly he more psychoanalyzes people and sort of personalizes some therapy then he does fret about their starsigns.

Sapnap - Ultimate Arsonist

- He is very proud of his flame abilities. He holds a “No one gets hurt unless I want them too.” Attitude about his fires. He knows just how to make a flame worse or better and was consulted in several forms be it weapons, demolition, or prevention. Basically, dude knows everything about fire.

George - Ultimate Model

- Not necessarily a model for his looks, rather his appeal. He just has a face people apparently love. Companies would play vast sums of money for him to pose with their product as it seems whatever he was attached to would sell like hot cakes. Even when he was a child his school made him sit alone in front of their stand as a mascot instead of working with everyone else.

Eret - Ultimate Aspirant

- Kind of the other side to Jack’s coin. He earned his ultimate title because no matter what he was put in he worked his hardest in and improves tremendously, not always beyond others of course but he himself gets better than he was. He as a mind and a drive for success.

Dream - Ultimate Prey

- Ultimate prey. Governments from all over the world would drag him into their battlefields to test their powers. He’d been shot several times actually but no one ever managed to catch him.

#despair in suits ♣ ♠ ♦ ♥#dsmp AU #dream smp #dsmp #dsmp danganronpa

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tomhiddlestonfanfic · 3 years

Text

Scared of Shakespeare

CHAPTER NUMBER/ONE SHOT: One shot WHICH TOM CHARACTER: Actor Tom PAIRING: Tom Hiddleston/Reader GENRE: Romance INSPIRATION: Shakespeare’s Sonnet 116, Sonnet 130 and Sonnet 18 read by Tom Hiddleston. PREQUEL TO: Did We Miss It?

Scared of Shakespeare

You smiled and turned around in bed as you woke up to the smell of fresh coffee. Tom was as energetic and self-disciplined as always, getting up early to go for a run. A great contrast to yourself, seeing as you loved to sleep-in and had a tendency to procrastinate things. It was December 31st 2020, the last day of the year. You had looked forward to starting a new, hopefully less turbulent year, together with Tom and felt in a good mood as you got out of bed. It was only going to be the two of you in his apartment celebrating the new year, due to the social distancing recommendations. You would miss not being able to celebrate the new year with friends, but was at the same time grateful that you didn’t have to do it alone.

“Goodmorning,” you greeted Tom as you got into the kitchen where he was sitting, reading a book while sipping his coffee. “Morning?” he questioned amusedly and glanced down at his watch. “It’s past eleven.” “It is?” you asked surprisedly. You didn’t realise that you had slept for that long. “Do you remember your new year’s resolutions?” Tom asked as he put the book down on the table and looked at you thoughtfully. “Umm,” you uttered as you thought hard to remember what promises you could have possibly made. “I figured that much,” Tom said and got up from the table, grabbed the book and handed it to you. You frowned as you read the title ‘Shakespeare’s Sonnets’ and then uttered an ‘oh’ as realisation hit. Last new year’s eve, you had drunkenly promised Tom that you would read Shakespeare’s sonnets and reflect over their contents. He had gladly bought you the book you were now holding, but you had put it in the bookshelf and forgotten all about your promise. All year. How typical of you, putting yourself in a situation like this. “Umm, Tom,” you said as you followed him into the living room. “I don’t have time to read and reflect over all of the sonnets before the year is over.” Tom raised an eyebrow at you and put his hands at his sides, looking determined. “You have thirteen hours,” he told you firmly. “You may not have the time to deep dive into every sentence written by the bard himself, but you do have time to read and reflect over some of his sonnets. I have marked some of my favourites for you.” “Of course you have,” you replied with a sigh. Of course he wasn’t letting you get away with it. It was Shakespeare after all. There was no chance that Tom would let you off the hook. “Are you giving me an attitude?” Tom questioned, a smile playing at his lips. You wanted so badly to kiss them. “Maybe,” you mumbled, biting your lip as you looked at him expectantly. He walked up to you and you felt a thrill of excitement run through your body as he leaned in to whisper in your ear. “Let me not to the marriage of true minds / Admit impediments; love is not love / Which alters when it alteration finds, / Or bends with the remover to remove.” You swallowed as you listened to him recite the sonnet. As he paused and took a step back, you found yourself aching for more. More of his closeness, his voice in your ear, his hot breath against your neck and the words of Shakespeare recited for you. “Don’t stop,” you pleaded and looked back to find him smirking at you. That bastard. He knew exactly what he was doing to you. “I’ll read you the rest later, if you sit down and start reading right away,” he told you smugly. “I’ll get you your coffee,” he offered and led you towards the sofa. You slumped down and reluctantly opened the book. You had always thought that Shakespeare would be too difficult for you, that you would not understand a single word, much less be able to interpret his writings correctly. You were afraid to be regarded as stupid if you failed to understand what the poems said, that’s why you had never opened the book. You were too scared. Tom came back with your cup of coffee and frowned as he saw your dejectedness. “What’s wrong?” he asked. You put the book down next to you on the sofa and sighed heavily. “I’m scared,” you admitted. “Of what?” Tom asked, struggling to understand what was weighing you down. “Of Shakespeare,” you tried to explain. “You’re scared of Shakespeare?” Tom asked confusedly. “Yes,” you replied sadly. “I’m afraid you will think I’m an idiot if I don’t understand the meanings of his sonnets.” “Have you tried reading one?” Tom wondered and picked up the book before sitting down next to you. He put an arm around your shoulders and pulled you close to him. You instinctively rested your head against his shoulder. “Well, have you?” he asked when you didn’t respond. “No,” you admitted. “But I’m pretty sure I won’t understand even if I try. Shakespeare is not for everyone.” “I think you’re wrong. Shakespeare is for everyone, it’s just that not everyone knows it yet,” Tom insisted. “You sound like a fanatic,” you told him amusedly. “Like a member of some Shakespeare cult.” “Shh, not so loud,” he hushed you humorously. “On a more serious note, Shakespeare is nothing to be afraid of.” He turned the pages of the book until he reached one of the pages he had marked for you. “Would you like me to read it for you?” he wondered and you nodded eagerly in response. “My mistress’ eyes are nothing like the sun; / Coral is far more red than her lips’ red; / If snow be white, why then her breasts are dun; / If hairs be wires, black wires grow on her head.” You smiled as you listened intently to him read. He made it so captivating, and you admired how effortlessly the words left his mouth. His mouth, his lips, not red like coral, but beautiful nonetheless. His eyes, nothing like the sun, but still full of life and enticing. “I have seen roses damasked, red and white, / But no such roses see I in her cheeks, / And in some perfumes is there more delight / Than in the breath that from my mistress reeks.” You laughed a little as he read this, and thought about how not even Tom’s breath would smell wonderful at all times, especially not if he had been smoking or drinking. “I love to hear her speak, yet well I know / That music hath a far more pleasing sound / I grant I never saw a goddess go - / My mistress when she walks treads on the ground. / And yet by heaven I think my love as rare / As any she belied with false compare.” You loved Tom and found him perfect just the way he was. You didn’t need to put into words a false comparison, such as describing his eyes like the sun, to show that you loved him. That was how you interpreted the sonnet - as a love declaration giving a realistic description of the subject. You enjoyed it far more than you had expected. “So, any thoughts?” “I liked it,” you replied and kissed his lips softly. “And I love you. Even though your eyes are nothing like the sun,” you added with a wink. Tom’s entire being lit up with excitement at your words. “See! I told you. Shakespeare is nothing to be scared of, but something to cherish if you only give it a shot,” he told you eagerly and turned the pages of the book again to a marked page. “Would you like me to read you another?” he asked eagerly, and you couldn’t do anything but smile warmly at how adorkable he was and nod in response. “Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day? / Thou art more lovely and more temperate:...” You smiled and gave a sigh of content as you listened to him read the sonnet. Thanks to Tom, you were no longer scared of Shakespeare.

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