Hi Bea, hope it's okay for me to ask this, being part of the spectrum it's quite hard for me to understand things and evaluate them. Been IA for a past few months and I finally got to hear the new Louis' Zach Sang interview!! and I'm quite confused on why some people here said that Louis confirmed that he indeed have a choking kink but I've replayed it several times and I never heard him said yes about that? Am I just stupid or ? All I've understand that he's an andrenaline junkie. Help me out?
Hi friend
You are welcome in my inbox any time.
You are not stupid. If I think anyone is stupid, it is the people listening to that interview and coming away saying that Louis confirmed anything of the sort. I went back and listened again to remind myself exactly how that part of the convo went and because I want to be really clear about what Louis said, and for ease of reference, I've transcribed that section and put it under the cut.
I think it is reasonably clear what Louis is telling us here, and I think anything fans are saying about how this proves he has a choking kink is them justifying their behaviour. He talks a lot in general about how much he loves the energy of live shows, and the way that he almost feeds off that. What he described in Zach Sang was why he loves going down to barricade so much - that feeling he gets stepping out on stage is amplified, it's ten times stronger and better when he's down there with fans. He describes that as being the best part of the performance by far. I think it is clear this is a part of the show that Louis really loves.
None of what he loves does he describe as being related to the way fans behave and he does talk about it getting too much when a fan put their hands on his genitals. To suggest that anything Louis said in that interview, or elsewhere until now, means he consents to it, never mind that it signifies his enjoyment of it, shows a blatant disregard for what consent actually means and is genuinely quite terrifying. And every time a fan says something like "oh but look at hime he loves it" or "omg he's got a choking kink" they contribute to the environment where someone feels they can put their hands on his genitals without his permission.
I want to also take a second to focus on what he said about that Burberry shirt which was ripped and he said that wearing a button up was his 'first mistake'. I think it's quite likely Louis won't wear a shirt like that again, and that's an example of him being faced with a choice over changing what he wears to avoid fan's being able to pull his clothes off or wearing what he likes and being faced by that behaviour and I think that's representative of the bigger issue here.
Louis clearly loves the experience of being in the pit but being in the pit means fans touching him without his consent in a manner that could be quite harmful (whether that's a hand round his throat or a hand on his genitals). But I want to be really, really clear about this - Louis going back to barricade does not equal consent. I’d also like to be clear that whatever kinks Louis might have aren’t relevant - that wouldn’t make this a consensual interaction.
[The transcript is below.]
Zach: I see photos of you on the barricade... you allow people to touch you
Louis: Yeah, oh yeah man sometimes it gets pretty crazy
Zach: Oh you've been choked
Louis: Yeah do you know what that happened at like one show and then I swear like every other show now someone's got their hand on my neck. It got a little bit weird when someone grabbed my dick one show and that was a little bit extra, that was a bit too much.
Zach: A little bit?
Louis: Yeah, yeah, but I'm not going to lie, and without going into specifics about whatever they do when I'm down there, the feeling that I get when I walk out for the first song and I see the crowd for the first time, that's like one-tenth of the feeling when I go down into the pit. It's like that feeling kind of bottled up and thrown over you, and there's so much energy and so much intensity in those moments that it is by far my favourite part of the show.
Zach: It is gross, seeing people stick their fingers in your mouth
Louis: That was weird!! Did you see that yeah?! I watched the video and I think I thought that was the mic or something, I looked a little bit confused in that video. I don't even remember it, that's the other thing, once you're down there it all happens so quick and it's so chaotic. Like I remember watching that video back and I don't even remember it happening.
Zach: That energy does make you think, it changes perspective, as it relates to music and impact and really understanding who you are performing to
Louis: Definitely, definitely, not quite got round to fully immersing myself in the crowd. Maybe next tour.
Zach: To be honest, they're getting very personal and handsy. [To the camera] Like watch your hands.
Louis: It gets intense I will say that. Across South America, different gravy that. It was amazing/scary at the same time. Incredible. I had a shirt ripped off me, a nice Burberry shirt, a button up that was my first mistake, I went with a button up shirt. I went down and they literally just pulled it from me and just completely ripped it to shreds.
Dan: That must be a weird experience though? Because with One Direction you guys never got to get that close to the crowd did you?
Louis: No, I feel like there might have been in the earlier days, I personally did do a bit of that. I don't know on what song, you're hardly going to go down to WMYB and immerse yourself in the pit, but yeah it is. I can probably count on one hand the amount of times I had an experience even remotely similar to that. It is by far the best part of the show and I've seen some of my fans speculate like 'Why does he like that? It looks scary and intense or whatever' but that's kind of why it's exciting. There is an element of danger to it that makes it feel really amazing. Like I said before, if you understand what a feeling of adrenaline is, it is like times ten in that moment. It's unavoidable, it is on top of you almost.
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your little angel of a son inherits katsuki's bad temper, and it manifests in his terrible fours.
there's an awful little shriek that echoes throughout the house and katsuki is on his feet and halfway to the living room before his eyes are even open—but the only danger awaiting him there is a pouty little brat.
his son is sitting amidst a swarm of toys that have been strewn about haphazardly, and his arms are crossed and big fat tears are in his eyes and he looks mad as all hell. you do, too, sitting across from him with a deep frown, holding the ripped page of a book from his little shelf.
"no sir," you warn, "we do not treat our things this way."
you incite a meltdown.
katsuki feels his own temper flaring—half from shock and awe at his little mini-me and also from the exhaustion wearing him thin—when your son kicks his legs out in a burst of rage, letting out another little shriek of anger. your cheeks puff up, wearing the same furious expression, and at the hiss of his name, the little brat jumps to his feet and snatches a toy truck nearby and launches it across the room.
"oi!"
your son's attention snaps to katsuki, startled, losing a hint of anger as he pouts at the floor.
"what'd she just tell you?" and when he gets no response, katsuki prods with a, "hah? answer me."
but the little boy only stamps his little feet and grunts out a furious, wordless sound that has katsuki's lip curling. you let out a heavy sigh, shaking your head at him before frowning down at the torn page in your hands, and then katsuki is planting a hand on the back of his son's head and steering him towards the front door.
"time to take a walk."
the boy goes, even though his arms are crossed and his eyes are downcast. he only resists once, as katsuki tries to shove his little feet into his shoes.
"i don't wanna." he mumbles, face scrunched and wet before promptly looking away.
"i didn't ask."
"hmm!"
katsuki has to resist the urge to pinch his own son.
they get out the door eventually, and the little boy stomps along for the most part, no longer needing a guiding hand on the back of his head once they get around the block a time or two. neither of them say anything.
fatherhood has taught katsuki a lot of things, which was expected, but the one thing that's surprised him is—he's learned all the things he doesn't want his son to be.
the first of them being angry. not the way katsuki was, mean and selfish, throughout his childhood; hateful and careless, in his teens; shut off and simmering, even now.
he waits until the tension has melted off his little shoulders, until his little face has dried and evened out. his arms swing at his sides, occasionally coming up to wipe his snot with the back of his hand, and he eyes the few wildflowers they pass with a little hum and a small smile.
katsuki tugs once on his ear, frowning down at the little brat when he peeks up at him. "that how you're supposed to treat your mama?"
he doesn't answer at first, leaning his head all the way back and clicking his tongue against the roof of his mouth, until katsuki stops walking. "no, sir."
"how you s'posed to treat her?"
"with love."
"how you s'posed to treat your toys?"
"with care."
"uh-huh," katsuki squishes his son's cheeks in his hand, shaking his head lightly from side to side until he starts giggling. "that how you acted today?"
"no, sir."
"that how y'r gonna act again?"
"no, sir."
"okay," katsuki murmurs, nodding once before letting him free. the little boy bounces on his feet and sucks on his lip, grinning when his tummy is pinched. "now pick those for your mama."
and he does, carefully plucking a small handful of flowers from the grass as they make their way back home, and just before he runs up the steps to the house, katsuki's little angel of a son hands him the biggest one.
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