#not today tho!

[ajerboa]

Thinking about cowboy bepop again...

#I had to make Faye a magical girl #i couldn't stop myself #she would of course have a gun as her magical staff whatever #also catboy spike #cause you can babygirl poor mew mew any character #anyway eventually Ill actually learn how to draw chibis and shade/highlight #not today tho! #cowboy bebop #spike spiegel #faye valentine #swordfish #my art

[tiredassmage]

trooper!tyr + character growth early expac edition text posts

#swtor #swtor text posts #one day i'll stop making these at midnight and posting them at the same time #not today tho! #swtor trooper #republic trooper #vs: kiss with a fist / self control in locker room showers [trooper!tyr]

[genderkoolaid]

hi i just wanted to let u know, on ur most recent post is the line:

76.8% of male rape victims reported only female perpetrators, 10.4% had only female, and 9.6% had both.

i think it was bullet point 9. was one of these statistics meant to say male?

one day i will write a tumblr post without any errors

#not today tho! #m. #ask box

[pumpkinpaix]

all right I finished the slip case bit and I’m out I think lmao

as I suspected: I hate making slip cases

@spockandawe

#cyanoupdates #book arts #I am so tired and my tummy hurts lol #I will make the case later maybe lmao #not today tho!

[istherewifiinhell]

#some shit #sad.fm #uhhhhh. you know? #WERE STILL. on neotheatre lock down. ofc. #im gonna have to start thinking aout NEXT months album. gosh. #not today tho! #Youtube

[ghostofasecretary]

i have been unexpectedly low anxiety this three-day weekend (not low anxiety period, but a lot better than i thought i'd feel)

however i did spend a lot of yesterday and today feeling SUPER faint and dizzy and generally not great. have been drinking lots of water and eating lots to try and offset it and yet

just measured my heartrate after lying down for a good while (99bpm, yikes) and after standing up (144bpm) and i think it is safe to say it's been an unusually dysautonomia time in chez Ghost

#i don't have full blown pots so a lot of times my heart rate increase is 20-25 points instead of. y'know. 30 or more #not today tho! #ghost speaks #love to just. have my body not work well when i was expecting my brain to not work #weirdly tho my mom who also probably has dysautonomia has felt super dizzy today?? #is it the environment? who knows not me

[ll0rax]

hm

i need to find a new way to take screenshots asap

credits to all cc creators

#idk what im doing #the sims 4 #sims 4 #mysims #i should learn how to render #not today tho!

[yourfavoritewerewolf]

looking at linkedin for more than 2 min at a time is making me physically ill atm

#usually i can do job searches for 30 min bursts then apply to like a dozen jobs in a couple hours #not today tho! #today it makes me wanna throw up!!

[butchprophet]

having a cane is literally already so nice

#normally hobbling outside for this long wpuld have done me in on a humid day... #not today tho! #/file/text #/c:/programs/notepad.exe

[fandom-trash-goblin]

i beg you to love me, say that i'm enough, but you tell me— why are you like this? i think there's something wrong with you.

for @shestrying

thanks to @acelania for finding the unknowns!

in image / desperation sits heavy on my tongue, tumblr user tullipsink / mary oliver, ‘north country’ / virginia woolf, letter to violet dickinson / in image / blythe baird, from if my body could speak / Alice in Bed: A Play' by Susan Sontag (link in comment) / lynee rae perkins, criss cross / elena ferrante, Those Who Leave and Those Who Stay' (trans. Ann Goldstein) / rainer maria rilke, from rilke’s book of hours / in image/ in image

#webweaving #webweave #poetry #aesthetic #quotes #spilled ink #poems and poetry #poems and quotes #writing #poem #spilled poetry #words #spilled thoughts #dark academia #web weaving #*mine: graphics #brought to you by my anxiety running wild and my brain deciding today's a fine; fine day to ponder on the realisation that- #- all i've been doing is failing since a past few months... years #okay tho this one looks sorta ugly #some images blurred some not; unfortunately; i dont have the diligence to correct it as of yet #we'll see #added sources - 27/3/24

[keymintt]

a comic/zine about coyotes

#art #comic #coyotes #comics #my art #digital #zine #idk what else to tag this if anything #i just think coyotes are so fucking cool and excellent queer symbolism. if you think about it #< he has thought about it so fucking much #shoutout to the handful of ppl who kept me company on stream last night too hehe #sorry if you get a version with typos they should all be corrected by now. i unfortunately have adhd and made this in two days #busted out all the illustrations for this in...one night for phx zine fest lmaO #our group found out two days before we were tabling that we got taken off the waitlist. had fun today tho #greatest hits

[puppy-fag]

one day I'll stop sucking dick in the parking lot

#not today tho! #remi rambles

[sushiisiu]

this text message has made me think of scollace since the first time i saw it so

#my art #scott pilgrim #wallace wells #scollace #scott pilgrim vs the world #spvstw #scott pilgrim takes off #just a crappy ipad doodle today tho... bc i have hw and was out

[obsob]

to be loved is to be held!!! print

#mine #cats #i made into. a5 print!! #i will still stock th larger one for now....i lov a5 tho its so nice. so compact #i had a good day today! went into the city and got notebooks and sticker and a poetry book i am going to hvae to read very very slowly #i can beat dyslexia . i can win #it is very cold also. perhaps will hve a bath tomorrow! and do some drawing :3 #i hope everyone has a nice evening #if u are wondering how cat is doing he is settling in good ! he keeps clawing at the furniture but hey. thats a cat

[andthebeanstalk]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need. #the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist. #the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28! #a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents. #they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong. #and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives. #you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead? #or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of. #no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow. #i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong. #just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

[allykatsart]

The Fall of Joy

Masterpost

An idea that I pray does not happen. I stg Emily better be safe and happy these next two episodes-

Hypothetical Fallen Angel Emily! Because this angst would not leave my brain. It hurts to leave heaven, but she won't be alone. If Emily was cast from heaven, I think the hotel would welcome her with open arms...

Commission me

#hazbin hotel #Hellaverse #charlie morningstar #vaggie #seraphim emily #emily seraphim #Hazbin hotel au #my art #comic #does this count as an AU? #artists on tumblr #fanart #art #the angst was too strong #also emily with that short haircut was v cute #something something religious trauma has done something to me man #i feel emily oof #new episodes today tho!!!!! #im excited and fucjing terrified