reconnecting with my tarot deck
new moon - 7/18/23
catching up:
1. how do you feel about our new home?
three of wands ↑
it (initial thoughts): exciting new opportunities while leaving a lot behind
cm (card meaning/thoughts after reading on card): inner balance, outward connection, shifting perspectives
2. thoughts on new altar?
the empress ↓
it: (hard to interpret) stifling or too ambitious?
cm: flexible and open, a lot of room to grow
interview spread:
1. what is your nature?
page of pentacles ↑
it: curious and protective, wants to learn with me and provide guidance
cm: looks ahead to a bright future, optimistic
2. what are your strengths?
the tower ↓
it: (hard to interpret) caution?
cm: guidance through difficult change
3. what do you like doing best?
seven of pentacles ↑
it: working towards achievement, helping me get what I want
cm: moving forward to success and committing to my happiness
4. what are your weaknesses?
seven of wands ↓
it: control, staying on topic
cm: overestimating, not knowing when enough is enough
5. what do you not like doing?
eight of pentacles ↓
it: big spreads, using too much energy at once
cm: unsatisfying spreads. not working in the right direction
6. how do you feel about me?
three of wands ↓
it: taking on more than I can handle, not taking time to enjoy what I have
cm: too indulgent, need to reassess and reconnect
7. what do I need to learn?
the hierophant ↑
it: be more open, don't take things at first glance
cm: it's okay to bend the rules, make your own
8. how do I work to achieve that?
four of pentacles ↑
it: be aware of what I have and how to use it
cm: keep an eye on what's mine
9. where do you see us going together?
the high priestess ↑
it: working together to find and build my magic
cm: a lot of possibilities and suprises
closing one card pull - what do I need to know?
ten of cups ↓
it: things may look bleak or overwhelming, but I need to and will persevere
cm: hash out and take charge of my issues
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the thought of a dom eating me out is so hot. please hold my legs open and pin my hips and ear me out til I'm shaking and sobbing with overstimulation, keep going when i beg for you to stop and kiss me after so I can taste myself on your tongue
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$800 later 😩 (tw for sick pets - he’s okay tho!)
Took the cat to the vet because he was lethargic and hadn’t eaten much lately. They did blood and urine work, and turns out he has pancreatitis. After blood work, urine work, medications, fluids, and antibiotics for a potential uti, and a bath because he peed on himself, he is home and doing okay. Glad he’s still here, but holy cow my wallet is crying.
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between dracula daily and eurovision going on this week i have a huge urge to go on trip around europe but after a quick look at my bank account the best i can do is girlbloging i guess
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There is a version of me that looks at the clock at night and goes "4 hours of sleep is fine actually. You've done worse to yourself. You're gonna be so fine and normal tomorrow." I am not very fond of that version of me right now.
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fionna's world being represented by a dandelion makes so much sense ... they're weeds. yet people make wishes through them, changing their whole meaning from something meant to be destroyed to something hopeful.
dandelions are also resilient and it makes sense that something associated with them would. you know. perservere despite the destruction caused by the scarab.
but ultimately i think what REALLY made me tear up over this is that dandelions are really boring plants. when you're a kid you blow on them and make your wish but they're not eyecatching or anything but still, fionna's final wish was for her old world to still exist as it was when she left it (> plain and simple. boring even).
like the moment she realized she would lose her friends, and that her friends might forget each other if the world got its magic back, she immediately decided she didn't want it and I think that ties back to the dandelion metaphor so well... like, do you really need magic to be real to find it everywhere? or can you turn something boring into something magical?
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something something the way sand from the beach is still in your shoes a week later something something grian not being able to escape the desert and the memories he has with scar something something sand metaphor
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