#not even trying to be dramatic its just been awhile since a character has mattered to me in this kind of way | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

pandoraborn · 3 years

Note

im so sorry for the vagueness of this, but please. any kind of ghostbur+sbi angst. please.

Characters: Ghostbur, c!Tommy, c!Techno, c!Phil Word count: 1497 words Content: canon divergence, techno’s execution, post exile, Tommy is sick, Techno is injured, gore, blood, whump, angst, hurt/comfort, mention of death, SBI, sleepybois inc,

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He sees the anvil drop.

He sees Techno crumble, falling to his knees before springing back up. Ghostbur can only stare, as if hypnotized by the gory scene before him, because Techno is very much a skeleton, slowly being stitched back together by some unseen force. Logically, he knows it’s the totem of undying working its magic, but emotionally, Ghostbur knows he’s never going to purge this memory from his brain.

He holds Friend closer to himself as he watches Techno jump away and disappear in the following madness. If he had a heart, it’d be pounding rapidly. If he had lungs, he’d be wheezing and gasping in fear. The ability to cry is also nonexistent, leaving the ghost unable to do anything but stare at the empty cage. Ghostbur stares for a long time.

When he looks up at Phil, trying to find some explanation for what happened, he finds that Phil’s house is empty. Phil must’ve snuck out in the chaos, when Tubbo and the rest of the ‘butcher army’ hadn’t been watching.

Now he’s alone. There’s no one else around, no distant voices to help him come back to reality. Reality is watching a long time friend turn into a skeleton and magically stitch himself back together, before running for his life. Reality is his father being put under house arrest simply for protecting Techno.

Reality is Friend bumping into him, startling him out of his swirling thoughts. Ghostbur puts a smile on his face, taking the lead and tugging Friend inside Phil’s house. The sheep will be safe here for the moment, while Ghostbur thinks of someone to turn to. He needs comfort from someone who can actually speak to him.

Tommy comes to mind.

Part of Ghostbur wonders if he should even talk to Tommy, because he hadn’t seem Tommy since before his party. Would Tommy be angry with him for not showing up? Maybe it’s a risk worth taking, because it’s Tommy, and they love each other. A dim memory surfaces; he remembers Phil mentioning the other day that he’d been in contact with Tommy, and Tommy’s now safe from any sort of harm. Ghostbur wonders if that means Tommy’s at the cabin, so he heads in that direction.

It doesn’t take long for Ghostbur to reach the cabin. He hopes the others are already here and in one piece, but Ghostbur can’t get the image of the execution out of his head. If he had the ability to feel sick, he’d probably be vomiting in the snow.

Techno’s clearly home, because Ghostbur can see the trail of blood leading toward the cabin. Carl, his horse, is also just outside, unharmed.

Before Ghostbur can enter, he hears raised voices. He pauses at the door, leaning closer to hear more clearly, but nothing he’s hearing sounds great.

“Techno, hold still, you’re bleeding everywhere! You’ll also wake Tommy.”

“I’m sorry, I had to rip my arm out of an entire bar, right after being executed! I’m not exactly going to remember my manners for the stupid kid beneath us. He can always sleep later!”

“If you don’t shut up and hold still, I will splash you with a weakness pot and smack you over the head so I can heal you properly. Your bones need to set and you need stitches.”

Ghostbur’s heard enough. He barges in, trying to plaster a smile on his face, but it feels off when he sees the wound on Techno’s arm. It’s not just a deep gash, but a giant hole where muscle and skin should be. There are tears in the pig’s eyes, there’s an expression of anger in Phil’s eyes that render him almost inhuman. If Ghostbur were to actually let himself think about it, he’d admit he was terrified of them both right now.

“Ghostbur,” Phil says curtly. “Go downstairs and check on Tommy.”

“Your arm-”

“I’ll explain it to you later Ghostbur,” Techno grumbles. “Do what Phil says and don’t ask questions.”

“I was there! I saw what happened! Phil, I left Friend in your house.”

“Ghostbur, go downstairs and sit with Tommy. He needs someone more than Techno does.” Phil’s voice has an air of finality to it; Ghostbur doesn’t want to argue with him. Shoulders slumping in disappointment, he disappears down the ladder to check on Tommy.

Come to think of it, he hadn’t seen the boy since before his beach party. Would Tommy be mad at him for not showing up? Why is Tommy even here, isn’t he supposed to be on holiday? Everything is far too confusing anymore, but even those thoughts are pushed out of his mind when he sees the teen sitting in a bed.

Tommy is far too thin and sickly looking. His skin is too pale, almost colorless, with dirty, greasy hair falling into sunken eyes. Each breath he takes is a painful wheeze, his fingers tremble too much to grip the bowl of food he’s trying to eat.

Tommy’s gaze flicks up briefly when he sees Ghostbur, glancing back down a second later. “Hello.” Even the boy’s voice is rough.

First he watches Techno die, now he has to see his brother sick and malnourished? What kind of holiday had he been on?

“Tommy?” He moves closer, just as afraid of the teen as he was of Techno. Ghostbur already wants to forget today’s events and go back to being ignorant. He’s happier when he doesn’t have to think about anything.

“Surprise, we’re all alive.” Tommy’s tone is unbelievably dark, as if he doesn’t believe it himself. “One minute I’m contemplating everything that went wrong, and the next, Philza’s carrying me here like I suddenly matter. I go to sleep, and wake up to Techno missing half an arm. Dunno what happened there, neither of them will tell me.”

“I watched Techno die,” Ghostbur blurts. He probably shouldn’t have phrased it like that, but the words are out. “He had a totem though, so he survived. It’s a good thing, I think.”

“Ah.” Tommy sets the bowl of food aside, lying back down. Rather than looking colorless now, he’s turning a shade of green. “That’s information I didn’t need while trying to eat.”

“I’m sorry Tommy.”

“Are you okay?” Tommy asks. “Forget about me, I’m in great shape. You, on the other hand, look pretty shaken up.”

“Ah, yeah.” Ghostbur looks away. “Tommy, I forget a lot and I’m not the best, but what happened to Techno isn’t fading. I’m not sure how to process it.”

“You need a hug or something?” Tommy stretches one arm out toward Ghostbur. “Because you look like you could use one.”

“Are you sure you’re not using that as an excuse to get a hug for yourself?” Ghostbur can’t resist the tease. Nor can he resist the offer, letting himself move closer until he’s in Tommy’s arms.

“Fuck you, I don’t need a hug from anyone.” Tommy’s voice is muffled. “I’m independent and can do anything I want to on my own.”

“You keep telling yourself that,” Phil’s voice interrupts. “Even on your deathbed, you’re going to give us all a headache.”

Ghostbur’s eyes nearly bug out. “Deathbed?” His gaze whips back toward Tommy to make sure Tommy isn’t actually dying. “Does he need a tot-”

“Ghostbur, relax. Tommy isn’t dying, and I assume you’re here to talk about Techno. He’s not dying either. Everyone here will be fine.” Phil rolls his eyes. “All three of you are the most dramatic shits I have the misfortune of knowing.”

“Fuck you Phil,” Tommy groans. “I can still fight you.”

“If you can get up without fainting, I’d love to take you on,” Phil laughs.

“Is... Techno’s really okay though, right?” Ghostbur asks. “Because-”

“Ghostbur.” Phil sombers up to give the ghost his full attention. “I’m sorry you had to see that earlier. I know it’s not easy, and judging by your reaction, your brain isn’t letting you forget it so easily. Techno’s strong, Tommy’s strong. We’re all going to make it out of this in one piece, alright?”

Ghostbur looks down. “Three of you will. I’m afraid it’s a little late for me, dad.”

No one has a come back to that. Whatever fragile bonds still connect this broken family are still fraying. Ghostbur may be there, they may be able to see and hear and touch him, laugh with him even. At the end of the day though, it’s a harsh reminder that he is not Wilbur, that the Wilbur they’d all loved is still dead, and not even his ghost can replace him.

“Hey Ghostbur?” Tommy tugs on his sleeve. “Will you stay with me for awhile?”

“Yeah.” Ghostbur lies back down, wrapping his arms around the teen. Everything about the boy is too bony, nothing about his appearance is okay. He wonders if Tommy actually is dying.

Nothing more needs to be said though. Broken family or no, at least all four of them are together.

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h0neyjaehyun · 3 years

Text

☁︎ 𝐁𝐮𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐥𝐲 ☁︎

Summary // Tali gets to see a couple people who she hasn’t seen in a bit and she misses their presence.

Characters // Talia Flores + Bang Chan + Lee Felix + Hwang Hyunjin (ft. Nct 127)

Era / Year // March 2018

Word Count //

Tali was doing some stages with Nct 127 and she wanted to say hi to a group of boys who she hasn’t seen a bit because of her schedule but since they debuted and got the same month comeback she was eager to see them again since they talk mostly through calls and text messages she wanted to take the chance to see them again. She finds them, so precious to her, they have saved her through many hardships before Nct.

Did Nct know them, nope, they know the group exists, but doesn’t know Tali knows them personally.They have seen Tali talking on the phone with them doesn’t mean they know who they are, all they know it was a couple of Tali’s friends.They didn’t even know if they were a male or female (or non binary we don’t discriminate here :)...side note though please tell me if that happens I will edit it :] ).

Tali was always secretive, not necessarily in a bad way; she just rather the things come out gradually instead of mentioning, mostly because some things in her life to people might seem like she would want attention...in her eyes anyway.The boys always say it's okay to tell them anything, she would always say okay with a sweet smile but the boys learned she is not like that. She doesn’t reveal it, she likes the “secret” themselves to be revealed by themselves.For example the boys didn’t know that she had a twin brother until he sent a care package from his travels so she won’t be homesick.

She reacted so nonchalantly, “Yeah I have a twin brother.”She deadpanned just blinking, wondering in her mind what was the big deal. She always thought it doesn't matter how much of the person's past she knows, as long she can trust and feel comfortable with them knowing that they're gonna be with her is all she needs. A person's past does not define them completely, it just defines how they became who they are today. Her past was not the best, probably one the most concerning past people close to her have heard and yet she is considered one of the sweetest,softest, and understanding people in the industry.

“Well why didn’t you tell us you had a brother????”One of the boys said with a shocked voice on how she didn’t tell them.She thought about it resulting in “I don’t really know, I don't really like talking about my family so usually people get surprised that I have a brother. So my reason is, I just don’t like talking about my family, thats about it.” They were surprised at her response, especially about not liking to talk about her family and asking them to leave the subject, they were hesitant but decided to respect the female’s wishes and left it.

They learned not to ask questions about her past cause she feels uncomfortable that includes the group she is about to go see

“Tali where are you going?” Johnny questioned the female that was about to leave the waiting room.Everyone looked at her confused as well, she usually stays to take a nap and stuff since she always has a busy schedule.She turned with her heels looking at Johnny “I’m just gonna see some friends I haven’t seen in awhile I’ll be back within 20 minutes tops.”She said while turning back around walking before they can follow or protest about her going alone.

“Sooo whatcha doin’~“ she said with a cute voice, Hyunjin looked at her and back at the crane.

Tali turns the corner and sees a tall handsome boy looking at the crane thinking if he should play,she saw the camera remembering she is still an idol, but thought eh screw it. She sneaked up behind the boy and yelled.

“BOO!’, he jumped and turned to see a familiar face, he whined saying

“ AHhHhh~, oh my gosh Butterfly...you gonna be the death of me.” Hyunjin said while having a hand on his chest being the dramatic llama he is (we love him).Tali giggled like a child which she doesn’t usually do since she is always a concerned mother around Nct even with the older ones. So this was a new side of Tali, fans were adoring. Hyunjin gave her an eye smile and hugged her.Them forgetting that they are idols which fans adored.

“Seeing if i’m able to get a plushie...” Hyunjin dragged while looking at Tali looking at the llama.He smiled to himself.

“Do you want the llama, Butterfly?” he asked with a soft and sweet comforting voice, let me tell you STAYS AND N-CITIZENS WERE WHIPPED FOR THE DUO.Tali looked at him and then the plushie in thought.

“Yes please” she said with hopeful eyes that the handsome boy will win her the plushie. He looked at her eyes and he couldn’t resists his Butterfly, he smile sweetly so much that both fandoms thought they were being attacked.

”Then one llama plushie coming up” he sang starting to play the game.

They let her go finally.They went back to Hyunjin about to win her a bunny, she smiled when the crane hooked on the cute bunny finally and falling in the shoot. Hyunjin grabbing it looking back at her with a princely smile loving the look on her eyes seeing she has fallen in love with the stuffed animals he has won her.Felix looked excited for some reason which made Tali looking at him with confusion.

After good 5 minutes he got her 2 plushies and her eyes lit up when he did.Seeing her eyes light up like that made him want to do it again just to see the light again.Then they got joined by two other people that she has been wanting to see.One practically tackling her in a hug another hugging her gently on the other side of her both in unison.

“Hello our Butterfly.”they both sang.“Hello my 2 aussies” she said with childish giggle.

”Its us!”

Felix said cutely which made her confused but found him adorable.

”Oh he means that the animals are us.”Chan said with realization dawning on everyone's face. Hyunjin was the llama, Chan was the wolf, and lastly Felix was the cute bunny.She smiled to herself looking them.

“Then I will name them Hyunjin, Chan and Lix'' Tali said smiling widely happy to see her friends and naming her new plushies after them. They all looked at her and melted on how cute she looked with all the plushies in her arms looking at them.

Then realization dawned on her that she has to go perform in 5 minutes or a little more.She looked at them.

“Oh my gosh I have to go” she said a little panicked, the boys knew what she meant and found it funny she almost left but Chan stopped her.

The boys looked at her then looked at the machine noticing a camera…” Well, I hope you accept our friendship, and Tali FIGHTING” Chan said saying good luck with her boys when they see this video, cause it probably earn her a talk.

“You're forgetting something” he said with a cheeky smile.She looked at all three of them shaking her head with a smile.She kissed Chan’s cheek, Felix’s nose, and lastly Hyunjin’s forehead with a little struggle.

”Now I gotta go, tell the boys I said hi okay? BYYE!” She running away.

Meanwhile with Tali

“HEYY IM, BACK SORRY I LOST TRACK OF TIMEE” she said kinda out of breath from bowing and running. The boys laughed at her saying it was fine but, Mark noticed so plushies.

”Ay, where did you win those your not good at the crane game” He said with a teasing smile.Tali just playfully glared him pretending to be offend.

“Wow i’m hurt, either way my friend won me these.” She stuck out her tongue.The guys laughed at their interaction and continued to go to the stage.

Haechan thought in the back of his mind Who are they??.So during the performance he thought on how to find out who her friends are because he wants to be sure his Tali is safe.But the next day he didn’t have to look. The interaction already went viral.

“TALIA FLORES EXPLAIN” Haechan yelled walking into the living room where the girl was sitting confused with what the younger boy was meaning.

”Hmm?” she tilts her head cutely.

”No no no don't pull that cute thing with me.” Haechan pointed at her looking away from her not to fall for the non intentional cute act.

“What are you rambling about Haechan?” Mark who was now getting comfortable on Tali getting ready to cuddle since they just came back from practice and tired.

”LOOK!”Haechan said, shoving his phone in Mark's face.Mark grabbed the phone out of annoyance, all the members crowded around them out of curiousness. Then Tali realized what they were looking at...its was a video of her and Stray Kids Chan, Hyunjin, and Felix at the crane Hyunjin winning her the 3 stuffed animals that are currently on her bed.But that wasn’t the best part, oh no, they heard them call her Butterfly and Tali acting like HER AGE.BUT THEN THE EDITORS KEPT IN THE KISS OF THE CHEEKS AND NOSE ETC.All in scary unison looked at Tali who has been quiet not knowing how to react.

She was about to book it because she doesn’t know what to say and all the eyes are burning into her skull which is making her nervous.She laughed nervously about to get up but Mark when and tackled her back down on the couch to the position they were before.Then they start bombarding her with questions.

“OkaY ENoUgh” Taeyong notices they are overwhelming the girl, and not getting anywhere.They scatter now looking at her trying to read her emotions or what she is thinking.

”What do you want to know” she says with a breath that she didn’t know she was holding.They looked at her not knowing how to respond.

”We wanna know who they are to you.” Johnny said calmly, don’t the boys wrong they were not mad but mostly surprised, they have never seen Talia act like that affectionate with someone not them as she usually avoids people because of rumors.They just wanted to know more about the mysterious girl in front of them.

In thought, she was trying to find the right words to define the boys she so cared about,she looked up with the same caring eyes she would show them when they do something endearing.

”They are one of the most important people in my life.” They were shocked she usually doesn’t say anything about her friends and figured if they are important to her she would talk about them more.

”I've known the leader of the group since I was 11...he is one of the closest people to me and knows me the best…” she continued.

”He is one with the blonde hair and dimples who was hugged in front of me, the one who tackled me, his name is Felix I've known him around 3 years, lastly Hyunjin the tall one who was winning me those stuffed animals I've known him for around 4 years I believe.” she said looking at them all with a smile, she revealed this information like it was nothing.

The boys were not mad, sad oh no no. They were jealous. Haechan flopped on the ground and hugged her legs looking at her puppy eyes.

“Why don’t you kiss us when we ask you too but you do when they ask you!” Haechan whined, Tali eyes widened at his complaint, she started giggling and shaking her head in disbelief.

“Ha, okay fine” she said with sweet smile, leaning down and kissing Haechan’s cheek.The boy gasped with joy with his beautiful smile on full display.Now instead of the boys jealous of Stray Kids they were jealous of the boy who go the first cheek kiss of the group and started tackling her for kisses.

After she did their request, she went to her room for peace when someone started knocking on her door knowing exactly who it was.

”Come in Mark”. He came in shyly.

“..um..can we cuddle please” he said with his doe eyes in full display.She smile.

“Of course” she laid down and he laid on her chest the he looked at the 3 stuffed animals looked back her then punched all three of them.

”AY ay wait what are you doing, what did they ever do to you?!” He looked back at her, then buried his head in her chest again and said.

“I was jealous “ he confessed .She was smiling and shaking her head knowing he wasn’t the only one she was going to have to deal with this week.

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jenomark · 4 years

Text

Part 2

➔Pairing: Idol!Haechan x Reader (Female) ➔Other Members/ Characters: -.- ➔Genre: Smut ➔Warnings: Public sex + Vaginal penetration + Masturbation (F+ M) + Fingering ➔Word count: 4,170

➔Summary: He’s an idol, a friend, and you took his virginity. Beginning your friends-with-benefits relationship with Haechan wasn’t the best idea, but you just can’t help yourself when it comes to him.

↞ Part 1

They all feel how you feel when you watch him on stage, like he belongs to you. His smile just for you. Not for the camera, or the thousands viewing clips on social media, but just for you. His song performed for you, the words containing messages only you can decipher. His hips moving across the stage, the thing in his pants pointing in your direction, everything moving towards you, the girl in the crowd, the girl watching backstage, the girl sitting on her bed. No matter where you are in the world, the lights burn across your retinas, the heat in the seat of your pants making it hard for you to stay still. You move just a little bit and feel the throb below, a Venus flytrap waiting for its prey. You pretend he makes eye contact with only you, acknowledging the very existence you try to hide from everyone else. He sees you, he really does.

The song ends and the mirage vanishes. Six people go in different directions, smiles wiped from their faces as easily as make-up. They forget the crowd, forget what it means to be themselves when others are watching. He veers towards you just a moment before remembering where he is and who he is, and then he passes you like you’re invisible. You wonder what he was going to do if he reached you. Kissing in public is too dangerous, even talking together arouses suspicion. You wait a second and follow him, each step playing around with your heart. As you round a corner, you walk into him, your body bouncing off of his.

“I didn’t see you,” he said. He did. “I’m sorry.” He’s not.

His fingers are on your arm, his eyes gawking at your cleavage, his tongue licking the middle of his chin. Staff pass by and he lets you go. He steps back and leans against a wall, his body pressing against its blank canvas like a work of art. People cut between you two, but neither of you notice, or care. He smiles, raises an eyebrow, and purses his lips with the pride of a million men.

“Come with me.” he mouths.

As if you have a choice, you follow him through the people, past the place you had come from. A few staff turn to see the idol boy, his greetings charming, his stage outfit sticking out like a sore thumb. No one notices the girl trailing behind him, her eyes following him with determination, her legs clamped so tightly together, even as she walks. Haechan goes down a ramp until he’s underneath the stage. You hesitate a moment before following behind him. There is something about breaking the rules that has always scared you. Since you met Haechan, you had been doing a lot of that. Though you are terrified of being recognized, no one is paying attention to you. He hides behind large black cases on wheels, their metal clasps shiny when the strobe lights from above the stage hit them. Stacked on top of each other, no one can see what’s going on behind them. To reach him, you step over wires and broken lights that have been replaced. The moment the space swallows you up, Haechan takes your shoulders and pushes you up against the cases. He unbuttons your jeans and slides his palm in until his fingers are cupping you. The rough way he rubs his hand against you makes your knees threaten to buckle.

“This is dangerous.” you shout.

The sound from the music above drowns out your words. You’re afraid he can’t hear you, but then he leans in close to your ear and tells you that the danger is the best part. His tongue is on your neck for a second before his head is between your breasts. He’s greedy. His hands haven’t stopped rubbing you, your clit so sensitive and swollen that you can’t feel anything but a soft burn. When he pulls himself out from between your breasts, you can see that his make-up has worn off, and his lips are puffy from sucking and kissing your skin. The strobe lights from above the stage are peaking through the cracks, lighting up his face in brilliant hues of purple and blue.

“Hi,” Haechan says. “It’s been awhile since I last saw you.”

He removes his hand. He doesn’t pause to tell you to taste yourself, like he normally would. Haechan’s weakness is knowing how wet he makes you, and your weakness is giving in to him every single time. He hooks his fingers on either side of your jeans and pulls them down your thighs. They’re so tight that they won’t budge past your knees without a fight. Feeling frustrated, Haechan spins you around and bends you over one of the cases. Trying to get out of his buckled stage outfit also proves difficult, but the boy is determined. His cock is in you before you look behind to see if he’s free. The feeling of him never fails to flip your whole world upside down.

You say his name, and you say it loudly. The music vibrates your whole body, the heavy bass perfectly timed with his every thrust. The thrill of getting caught makes you want to scream every syllable of his name, each letter like a bread crumb leading to your hiding place. You think of how the music has to stop some time, how the lights have to turn on to reveal what is bent over in the darkness, and you wonder what it will be like when it happens.

Haechan: Are you thinking of me?

You: You wish.

Haechan: I’m hurt. Ah, it’s night time back home. Are you getting ready for bed? What are you doing?

You: Not you.

Haechan: You’ve been hanging around my friends too much. Seriously, none of you are funny.

You: Does the thought of me hanging out with your friends make you jealous?

Haechan: Yes. We both know I don’t share. I miss you. I’ve been away for too long. It feels like I’m going crazy.

You: Donghyuck, It’s been four days.

Haechan: That’s too long.😣 Do you miss me?

You: No.

Haechan: I’M HURT.

You: I have a hard time believing that. What are you doing? How was the performance?

Haechan: I think it went well. We almost dropped Mark during Cherry Bomb. Right now, I’m getting ready to eat. Taeil, Yuta and Johnny want local food. I’m really excited.

You: I hope you’re enjoying yourself. ☺️

Haechan: I am. I’ve been horny.

You: Is that all I’m good for?

The sound of the video call made you jump out of your skin. Like always, your volume was turned all the way up. You looked at your phone and saw Haechan’s picture staring back at you. At the beginning of your relationship, he had snapped a photo of himself and set it as the wallpaper for when he calls. “Don’t show this to anyone,” he had said. “They’ll never stop making fun of me.” In the picture he was acting cute, his finger poking his cheek. The way he looked was so far removed from how you saw him most days : sexy, naked, his face screwed up in orgasm. The word Devil was still a part of his name only you had added a little red heart next to it. You stared at his face a little longer before accepting the video call.

“What took you so long?” he asked. “I don’t have much time.”

You could see he was sitting in a hotel bathroom, most likely on the toilet with the lid down. When he saw you looking, he held the phone up to give you a short tour of the bathroom. He showed you the tub where he said he’d like to fuck you in, the toilet he was sitting on, and the sink. You weren’t as interested in his surroundings as much as you were in seeing his face.

“It’s nice.” you said.

“It’s nice until Mark comes in here,” he said. “Speaking of, he went out to grab something from Jaehyun’s room, so I don’t have a lot of time before he comes back. Let me see them.”

“Them?” you asked. You were playing dumb. You knew exactly what he wanted to see.

“Ahhh,” he groaned. “Why do you do this to me?”

In the darkness of your bedroom, you didn’t think he would be able to see you well. You lifted up your shirt, anyway, and showed him your breasts. Haechan was dramatic when you revealed them, his mouth hanging open, the sound from his throat sounding like a croak. You pulled your shirt down quickly, the disappointment showing clearly on his face.

“You can see more of them when you get back.” you told him.

“Six days,” he said. “I can wait six more days.”

It was the first time you were separated for more than three days. It had been almost two months since you started fooling around, but he came to your apartment nearly every day to spend time with you. Haechan being a staple in your life made it harder for you when he was absent.

During your short period of being together, you had grown too comfortable with him. You had exerted your time, patience and body far beyond what you thought it was capable of. There were days when your emotions completely took over, your happiness cradled in the palm of his hands. You were disappointed when you couldn’t see him, his fist closing tightly around any motivation you had for anything. In the physical aspect, there were days when your muscle aches were so bad after you finished fucking that you had to use muscle relaxing patches to get through your next work day. Fucking three times a night-sometimes four- was just as time consuming as it seemed. You were losing sleep, losing interest in doing anything but thinking of new ways to make him come.

You liked to wonder how it was from Haechan’s point of view. You didn’t know how he survived juggling his schedules, priorities, and you, all at the same time. He should have collapsed from exhaustion, or at least aroused suspicion from his members and the staff.

Even through all of the risks on both sides, neither of you wanted to stop when the reward felt so good. Stopping was never an option, not for you, or him. You were as addicted to him as he was to you, and you could not get enough of your drug. After you made him come, you wanted to get back on top of him, riding him until your pussy was raw, until your thighs hurt from being spread apart for so long. You didn’t know when each of you started wanting to break the other, but the obsession was seeping into every part of your life.

“Let me see your cock.” you said.

“What?” he asked. “My cock?”

The shyness in his voice made you smile. You tried to hide it off-camera, but he could see the way your cheeks were rising. Haechan smiled, too, his laughter directed towards the floor. In the camera, all you could see was his Balenciaga hat and the little tufts of hair curling around his ear. In between fucking, you would lay with him while he fell in and out of sleep, your fingers curling that very section of hair. In moments like that, you thought about how easy he was to love, and how hard it was to stop. He stood, turned around and placed his phone against what you thought might be the top of the sink.

“Are you sure you want to see it?” he asked. “You might not be able to control yourself.”

Haechan lifted up his shirt and tucked the end of the fabric underneath his chin. The belt he wore around his waist barely kept his pants up. He was losing weight lately, his body being worked in every direction. He unbuckled his belt, unbuttoned his top button, brought his zipper all the way down until his briefs were revealed. When you saw his cock, it was soft. He rolled it around the tips of his fingers until it started growing to its full length. Your mouth watered at the sight of him. You sat up in bed, brought your knees to your chest and rested your phone against your thighs.

“How long do you think you have?” you asked.

“A few minutes.” he said.

You didn’t have to tell him to touch himself. Haechan was already jerking himself off, looking down at his cock in his hands before looking into the phone camera. He turned to the side so you could have another angle of his body. Though it was probably wiser to keep quiet, Haechan did as he wanted. The moans filled the hotel bathroom, along with the sound of his palm around his cock.

“Tell me you want me,” he said. “Tell me you want your mouth around me.”

You took your phone into your left hand. With your right hand, you dipped it into your pajama pants and started playing with your clit. Your eyes were on his cock, his fingers rhythmically moving to his deep sighs. There was something so torturous about seeing him and not being able to have him. You had to stop yourself from bringing the phone up to your face and trying to lick him through the screen.

“I want you,” you said. “I want my mouth around you.”

You closed your eyes and imagined his cock sliding past your lips. You loved holding onto his hips and controlling how fast he fucked your face. You imagined what it would feel like to grab a handful of his ass as he did that. You tried to taste his imaginary cum, and how it would spill out all at once, like you had bitten into a delicious fruit and the juice was gushing into your mouth.

“Tell me…,” he began to say, his words breathless. “Tell me I’m the only one.”

“You’re the only one.”

You were moaning with him, your voices rising in unison. Having sex via video call wasn’t what you had planned for the night, but you knew it was a vital part of your life.

“Tell me-”

“-Tell you what? Anything. I will tell you anything.” you said.

“Tell me goodbye, Mom, I’ll talk to you later.” he said.

Your eyes snapped open as the video call ended. His selfie flashed for a second before disappearing. You were nearing climax, but the confusion made you stop touching yourself. You took your hands away from your pussy and read the text coming through.

Haechan: Fuck. Sorry. Mark. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.

You dropped your phone beside you and sunk back into your sheets, your pussy full of nothing but regret.

“Are you crazy?” you asked. “You shouldn’t be here.

“I wanted to see you.”

He stood in front of your apartment at midnight, his hat low over his eyes, a face mask over his mouth. The way he looked reminded you so much of the night you realized you wanted him in very compromising positions. You had grabbed the first jacket from your entryway, which just so happened to be one of his that he left. You hugged it tightly around your body, the smell of him wafting into your nostrils.

“Just see me?” you asked.

He laughed. “Yes. Now that I’ve seen you, I can go.”

“You and I both know that you can never just go.”

“Perhaps I am crazy,” he said. “But I am also tired. Jet lag. I should be resting.”

“Don’t let me stop you then.”

You stood with a lot of distance between you. The way you were feeling as you looked at him felt foreign to you. Normally, you would barely talk before you stumbled into your apartment, tearing off each others clothes, pushing things onto the floor to fuck on the hallway table. With your whole relationship about the benefits rather than the friendship, it was easier to direct. You didn’t know how to handle moments when you were both forced to act like two non-feral people.

You felt like you wanted to tell him everything you’d went through since he’d been gone. You wanted to grab a bite to eat where no one knew his name, sitting cross-legged on the floor, and watching him eat his fill. Wanting those things made you unsure about how you truly felt.

“Do you want to go for a walk?” he asked. “This is a one-time offer.”

“Okay.” you answered.

You shut and locked the door to your apartment. When you turned back to him, his arm was extended. You looked down at his hand. Those hands had been all over your body. Sometimes you watched those hands touching other people and wondered what they would think if they knew they had been inside of you.

Losing his nerve, Haechan pulled it back before you could take it. Without saying anything, you moved beside him and took his hand back. If he wanted to hold hands, you would give him what he wanted. You both walked half a block before you spoke.

“How was travelling?” you asked.

“Fun, “ he said. “I feel lucky. I’m so grateful for the opportunities. I like it. How was your time while I was gone?”

You didn’t know how to answer truthfully so you just agreed that your time was equally as fun. Work days blended together when you had nothing to look forward to. You didn’t like to admit that you weren’t sure what day it was, or that so much of your life revolved around him. Luckily, he didn’t press you any further. It’s not that Haechan didn’t care what you were feeling inside, just that his outlook on life stayed blissfully positive, and you didn’t want to be the one to take that away from him.

“The clubs are still open,” Haechan pointed out. “I could use a drink right now.”

You knew that holding hands in public was the worst thing you could do that wasn’t behind closed doors. You never knew who could be watching, their phones clicking away like the ringing of a cash register. The people stumbling out of the clubs could be people you worked for, or worked with. All it took was for one person to recognize Haechan and the fun would be over. You thought about letting go of his hand, but you didn’t want to. He sensed your fear and directed you away from the crowds exiting the club.

“It will be okay,” he said. “As long as you’re with me, nothing will happen.”

You walked a few blocks before turning back to your apartment. The walking was aimless. After the club, you only came across a few people grabbing late night snacks at a convenience store. In the world the night had created, you both began to act more boldly. Haechan’s laugh was loud, his happiness contagious for people who passed you by. He brought you to him for back hugs, his arms squeezed tightly around you, his chin digging into your shoulder. Halfway back to your place, he got a message on his phone that stopped both of you in your tracks. You watched his face falter, his eyebrows furrowed together.

“Is everything okay?” he asked.

“It will be okay,” he said, repeating his line from earlier. “Don’t worry about me. Let’s just be here together.”

You walked the rest of the way in a weird silence. You kept looking over at him to figure out was wrong. Worst case scenario: everyone found out about what you two were doing. Best case scenario? You didn’t know, but you were hoping to find out one day.

“This is where I leave you, my princess.” he said.

You stood in front of your door. Hearing him call you his Princess made you want to giggle. In the beginning of your relationship, it was Haechan who reacted in such a way. Taking his virginity made him a little dependent on you. He often giggled when you suggested new positions, or told him how pretty you thought he was. Now that you were far into knowing each other in the most intimate ways, it was you who couldn’t stop becoming so giddy every time he opened his mouth. He could see his affect very well. You wore it hugged closely around your body, just like his jacket.

“Be careful walking home.” you said.

Haechan took a step forward. His figure was sexy, his eyes mentally undressing you. You thought that he might stay a little longer and fuck you on your apartment steps. Instead, he kissed you, his lips petal soft. As he pulled away, you could barely open your eyes to look at him. He backed away from you, his trademark smirk faltering just a little.

He stopped to look at you after making every move. For anyone else, you would have faked your enjoyment, but for Haechan, everything was honest. If he touched you, your body quaked in response. You couldn’t stop your eyelids from fluttering, your body from moving up the bed to get away from his persistence. If he made you feel good, you let him know with your shortness of breath, your knuckles clenched around the sheets.

“You make the funniest faces when you orgasm.” he observed.

You resisted the urge to take the pillow from underneath your head and whack him with it. Haechan sat between your legs, your knees hooked over his thighs. Often, you sat like this when you both felt too lazy for much else. He would play with your pussy for what felt like hours, his fingers pushing into you to see how many you could take. He would trace your labia with his fingertips, draw love hearts on your clit. He loved the way you looked when you were wide open for him, loved you shaved and unshaven.

“It’s a compliment,” he said when he sensed your hostility. “I love everything about you, especially how ugly you look when you’re on top .”

You clamped your legs shut, trapping his arm. He laughed gleefully, pushing your legs back open before climbing up your body. He laid across you, his full body weight crushing yours.

“You’re heavy.” you said.

Haechan flopped his body around, like a fish, until you felt his weight even more. You wheezed dramatically. The way you both joked around always made your day better. Laughing with him eased a lot of stress from your daily life. You used your hands to squeeze his cheeks. When he made a fishy face, you kissed his lips.

“I could stay like this all day.” you said.

“Not me,” he said. “I don’t want you lying on your back the whole time.”

You rolled your eyes, and he jokingly got offended. You pulled his neck down so that you could kiss him again. You made out like that, your naked bodies on top of each other, for awhile. The concept of time didn’t matter when you were together. There were times when you were thankful that all you did was have sex with each other. There was no fighting, no expectations, and nothing that could be torn apart if it wasn’t together to begin with. When your phone lit up, both of you pulled away.

“Who is it?” he asked.

“How am I supposed to know?”

Haechan took one look at your phone lit up on your night stand and pushed it off. It clattered onto the floor, your protective case splitting in two. You started to get up to check on it, but he pushed you back down. He got onto his knees and pushed your legs up so that your ass was lifted off the bed. His distraction tactics were good, you had to give him that.

“I’ll buy you a new phone.” he said.

Haechan took your hands and interlocked his fingers with yours. When he entered you, your mind forgot the phone altogether. The way he moved wasn’t his normal fast pace. Haechan liked to fuck you hard, each orgasm strong and earth shattering. Passionate was not a word you often used to describe what you and him did in the bedroom. As he moved inside of you, he lowered his body down over yours until he was hugging you. He kissed you as deeply as he was thrusting.

10:02 a.m.

Haechan: You’re not answering your phone

10:03 a.m.

Haechan: Call me back

10:46 a.m.

Haechan: I’m sorry I left so many voicemails I don’t know what to do

11:00 a.m.

Haechan: Pick up your phone

11:16 a.m.

Haechan: Johnny knows. He’s on his way to your apartment. Don’t tell him anything.

#haechan #nct #lee donghyuck #lee donghyuck smut #haechan smut #lee haechan #nct haechan smut #nct smut #nct fanfiction #haechan fanfiction #haechan smut fanfiction #nct smut fanfiction #I mean it's more than just smut tbh #there is a plot #it just has a lot of sex #anyway please forgive typos and stuff :D

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sullustangin · 4 years

Text

Not a disaster spy.

Note: I speak in lawful/neutral/chaotic alignments as seen in D&D. I’m not getting into good, evil, or neutral, nor “Dark Side” or “Light Side” activities.

There were more than a few reasons why I commissioned a piece of art that depicted some pretty gnarly scars on Theron Shan (and on my smug, Eva, but you don’t care as much about her, let’s be real). It’s part of a story I’m telling. It’s part of my headcanon. Also, it’s my own sort of protest against the habit of writing Theron off as a hot but inept spy. He’s an impulsive fool despite being intelligent, which is why he ends up in bizarre situations. He always gets hurt because of this (but he’s always magically healed up in time for any smut).

To be clear: Theron totally has issues due to his early life and an inability to play well with others; you can label him with attachment issues, intimacy issues, whatever keeps him a bit of a lonely character (which he admits). Personal life -- disaster. That’s canon, explicit and implicit.

What I object to are his skills and abilities being discounted because of that. His professional life is far from being a disaster. Director SIS Marcus Trant brands him as one of the best field agents, and long term, he ends up being operations manager for a covert base for an upstart independent government.

Reasons:

In the book Annihilation, Theron runs around in his boots and briefs trying to destroy the Ascendant Spear. Hot, funny, and strangely effective.

But why?

Because Jace Malcom and Marcus Trant were ok with sacrificing a few planets of people “for the greater good.” They let Ruan be attacked. They planned on letting Duro be attacked, because they wanted the Pub fleet to focus on the Ascendant Spear, the Empire superweapon. They watched a planet get wrecked and planned on doing it again. It’s war. It’s a lawful action, for the greater good. It complies with society’s expectations -- the Republic leadership’s expectations -- in a time of war. Lawful neutral, probably. Maybe lawful good if you squint and do the math about the Spear’s potential fatality rate, galaxy wide.

But Theron isn’t a lawful character -- he doesn’t just do stuff because society says it’s ok. That’s why he goes off and does impulsive stuff because sometimes, society is wrong. Theron is a neutral, leaning chaotic character -- he mostly follows the law, but also relies on his own intuition and gut feeling about what is right. Neutral characters balance what society says is right and what a person internally thinks is right. Chaotic characters -- like my oc smuggler -- don’t rely on society’s views at all; it’s all about her gut and moral compass. Theron at least considers lawfulness and order in his response, which is why he is (mostly) not a chaotic character. He has his moments, though - no character is pure. In contrast, Lana is a Lawful character in the context of the Sith Empire. She does things that her society approves of. She does like to think of herself as ‘her own woman’, but her behavior patterns are heavily informed by the Sith upbringing and training - she is Lawful but leaning Neutral on occasion due to her own sense of pragmatism. She does not go by her gut alone.

(Please remember I’m not addressing good/evil, Light/Dark side in this post.)

That’s why Theron ends up dehydrated with cramped leg and half naked. He didn’t want people to die "for the greater good” when he personally could stop it. So he and Gnost Dural fool Darth Karrid into participating at Duro, which means the Republic Fleet has to defend the planet, since its target is the Ascendant Spear. The only way that happens is that Gnost-Dural is tortured, and Theron has to manually slice into the nearly uninhabitable bowels of the ship. Hence the whole strip tease by the end of the incident.

Consequences:

In the example above, it’s mostly situational embarrassment for Theron, and the Jedi gets tortured.

In an earlier part of the book, Theron is beaten up to keep his cover and acquire important information (and loses a few teeth in the process) and leaps off a building and probably fractures a few things -- he dislocated a shoulder too. Still didn’t blow cover, and he is able get off Ziost with Gnost Dural.

Every SWTOR player knows about Rishi -- it’s easy to argue that Theron doesn’t give up Lana because that could burn his Republic ally. But if you’re playing Imp side, what’s stopping him? Flirting is nothing to this point. Why not burn all the Imps down? He could save his own skin, infiltrate the Revanites that way and save the Republic Fleet -- to hell with Darth Marr.

Because it’s not just “ooo rah Republic” informing his choices -it’s not Republic society saying it’s ok and lawful that makes him sit there. It’s his own moral compass that says it’s wrong to burn Jakarro and the operative, even if Lana did give him up. So he holds out under torture, even as Revan tries to make his descendant his ally.

Theron had been in SIS for about 12-13 years by the time we get to Rishi. We know he’s fallen from high heights and survived worse falls than leaping between buildings on Nar Shaddaa -- survived, not gotten out unscathed. He was a swoop racer for awhile -- that’s a risky hobby. As an agent, It’s reasonable to assume he’s been shot at with blasters and possibly slugthrowers (if he came across a Mando), stabbed with traditional blades or vibro-blades, got burned if he was in an industrial area or a hot engine room or a chemical lab -- the list goes on. After Yavin, we know that the one agent possibly more chaotic than he is, Jonas Balkar, ends up giving him a few broken ribs in the name of busting up an implants ring.

So Theron does have very real consequences for his decisions, in all likelihood. That’s what I wanted to reflect in the recent commission; although it happens shortly before the torture session on Rishi, it shows the viewer that this is a path he’s been on before, and not by accident.

Cutting here because boy, did I have a lot to say about what happens AFTER SoR in terms of alignment/characterization.

The KotFE and Beyond: Consistency Issues

Theron registers his approval and disapproval on certain decisions in later xpacs, and he often takes the more benevolent “light side” end of things -- whether that’s based upon his societal expectations or personal moral compass is not as clear. But he still does disagree with the Commander (one of the more obvious examples being storming out of the room if there are too many Pub casualties on Corellia when the player is Imp side). While it remains a touchy topic, the Traitor Arc does reflect his neutral-chaotic tendencies. He goes with his internal moral compass.

Electrocuting the Commander on Iokath was part of Theron gaining the Order of Zildrog’s trust. Theron’s smart enough and probably familiar enough with the Commander’s bio data to know how to make it happen and look bad enough without serious ill-effects. This is part of what he does as a spy, and there’s likely a guide on double agent sabotage somewhere in SIS -- how to look like you’re doing bad stuff without actually doing as bad stuff as requested. This is also part of what he personally believes to be a better path -- certainly not by Alliance “what to do when bad things happen” book, which was to tell his Commander.

Does Theron fail at Nathema? Yes; there is a major loss of war materiel (the Gravestone and the Eternal Fleet). But what would he have considered more important? The loss of the fleet or the loss of the Commander and others if the Fleet was unleashed? The loss of life or the loss of stuff? That’s where Theron’s neutral-chaotic alignment comes in.

It also does matter how the player views the entire situation -- Theron’s boss also has a say in ‘success,’ which is why Trant matters in judging Theron’s previous actions. At the end of KotET, some people had been miserable that they HAD to either be a ruler or a peacekeeper instead of just getting on their ship and riding off into the sunset for more class-specific adventures. By the end of Nathema, some people were mad about losing the weapons and the power. Some people were relieved that they weren’t so OP anymore; the writers had written story/character development into a corner, and ending the whole Throne/Fleet thing had to happen. (It’s still not fully out of a corner, in my personal opinion.)

Theron doesn’t get out of the Traitor Arc completely clean, no matter how many stans we write about it -- the writing is what it is. He assuredly gains a new scar. But it is player choice as to the severity of the failure -- and the consequences: Theron can end up married, still in love with the Commander, dumped by the Commander but in the Alliance, exiled, or dead. Those were the consequences for what he believed was the right thing to do -- this was probably his biggest leap into the chaotic alignment in terms of decision making, and this was the most dramatic spectrum of consequences.

As a side bar, the latter xpacs suffer from writing issues; there’s a lack of nuance compared to the vanilla stories and even Hutts and SOR. Although the writers did promise that characters would leave if there were enough negative actions, only Koth actually left because of something we did; Lana never leaves, and Theron leaves regardless of prior actions -- because he’s doing the double agent thing. (I thought the opening speech on Umbara was ill-fit for most classes, frankly -- the writing got better as we got closer to Nathema, but there are plotholes that make me fume.) Lana and Theron never leave because the player makes too many LS or DS decisions. I honestly wish that was a consequence, because not having a consequence for decisions hallows out both characters and makes them lackeys rather than the stronger, distinct characters they were prior to Popsicle Time. Lana never leaves no matter what. Theron ultimately remains gone by player decision, not by his own. Koth was at least granted that autonomy, for which I respect the writing for Koth.

Theron Shan is a good spy that accepts consequences.

Theron is good at his job -- the best at his job, around the time of SoR. Because of how Theron approaches the world, he takes risks so others don’t -- so others don’t get tortured, so other planets don’t get blown up. It doesn’t mean that he’s some inept idiot that fumbles his way toward mission success. He knowingly suffers for his choices that are a combination of by-the-book training and his instincts. He doesn’t complain about it, even when the player points it out on Rishi. It is the job. Spies do really, really strange stuff to keep their covers. He also doesn’t complain as he’s limping around after Nathema, nor does he object if he’s exiled or dumped. He knows what he did. He can live with it (if the player lets him).

Spies that remain alive and get back to their home nations without giving anything important up to the enemy are successful spies. We see this in pre-SWTOR media. Rishi is a success for Theron -- although he is exposed, he remains alive and uncooperative. The temporary Alliance between Marr and Satele gain massive amounts of intel, including Revan’s base on Yavin. Later, Theron is able to keep the Odessen base functional and secret. We even get to do some infiltration work on Zakuul -- the Alliance’s spies don’t give anything up while surviving and making it home with gains. He succeeds overall at Odessen. He fails at Nathema, though that failure is mostly interpreted by the player in terms of severity.

Few spies are perfect and survive to become old men. Even if Theron is killed at the end of Nathema, he did make it further than many; if we consider that Theron was about 37 or 38 at Nathema and he started SIS at 16, that’s upwards of 20 years in the field. That’s a long lifespan for an active field agent, even in real world estimates.

For those of us who let Theron live, then he still has potential for more spy escapades, though probably with some serious oversight. We can leave that to headcanons, since Lana and Theron have taken a step back in prominence since Onslaught. Theron will never be orderly like Lana; if you favor lawful characters, you will rarely see eye to eye with Theron. He is not a by the book spy, and even Trant complains about that. At the same time, the instinct, the skills, and personal conscience is there, which is why Theron is successful all the way up to Nathema -- and depending on the player, arguably still is.

Personal life -- sure, a disaster. No doubt. But as a spy? I don’t think disaster is an accurate assessment.

#theron thursday #theron shan #swtor #alignment #good spy

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graphicabyss · 4 years

Text

?人 NEWS

I wrote an enormous post, or rather an essay, concerning NEWS, Tegoshi, and everything that went through my mind in the past month. Honestly, it’s mostly my way of coping, getting it out of my system and sorting out my thoughts and feelings. But I decided to also post it here for those who might want to read.

It was a long time coming. The rumours were lurking around for years and a month ago they bloomed. And yet, the full realization is yet to dawn on me. When something devastating happens, our mind tends to shake off the pain by either exonerating the beloved person who hurt us, or blaming them and distancing away from them. It's really hard to stay objective. But I'll try.

Coming into this fandom, I prepared myself for disappointment. Once I was a TVXQ fan. You know, the 5-nin TVXQ that was going to be "together forever" and all that. So I wowed never to get that invested in a pop band. When NEWS came along, I tried not to get too attached. I knew it would hurt me, sooner of later. And for awhile, it worked. But, as years went by, I knew I lost the battle. We humans need to cling to something. Thus, nearly 7 years have passed.

To me, Tegoshi has always been a key component. He was the one that led me to NEWS. Or rather, how pretty he looked in a dress. Tegoshi always kept me interested. Sometimes he excited, sometimes he annoyed, but he was never ever boring. He was made of contradictions, both in words and in actions. Nothing ever adds up with him. He made me want to understand him but I could never quite grasp it. Thinking about it now, perhaps it was because he doesn't really understand himself either.

In these years, I had several crisis points where I considered leaving the fandom, all caused by something shitty Tegoshi said or did. But every time I bounced back. Of course, I didn't do it for him. I did it for myself. However, his selfishness has always been offset by his kindness. The last time was him crying at the end of Neverland tour and how sorry he looked. Till the end, I wanted to believe that his common sense and loyalty won't let him do something reckless and stupid. Yet, here we are. The interview he gave to Bunshun led me to believe that he would do the right thing. He said he would show his gratitude to JE and would definitely make his fans happy but now it's the furthest thing from the truth. The fandom is disappointed, confused, angry.

Some people say to get over it, that Tegoshi was meant to leave or some shit. But I think those people fundamentally misunderstand the heart of the problem. It's not that he left that infuriated the fandom. It's how and when he left. Most fans would support his decision to leave if the transition was done properly. He owed us that much. A proper apology. A proper gratitude. A proper farewell. The announcement had me in disbelief. I expected him to at least finish the contract, do the Story Tour, no matter how long it takes, and show the members, staff and the fans the respect they deserve. To cut it short feels like a violation. At the very least, we need a closure. The last goodbye. The last concert. The last something. He just left JE after 17 years like it was nothing.

More than anything, what he did seems so stupid. He had it so fucking good. He was always in the spotlight, both on stage and in TV shows. The other members did most of the offscreen work allowing him to shine. He was supported by endlessly patient members and staff. He had the freedom to choose and all the work he wanted for each of his passions - ItteQ, Soccer Earth, OpenRec. And he had fans that always supported him, no matter how many scandals he had.

What was so important that he had to give up on all the amazing benefits he had? To betray all this trust? And on top of it, at a time like this? When all world is going through so much shit? When the fans need moral support more than ever? What were the "dreams" that he talked about?

The ability to rant on Twitter? Making duckface selfies? Fucking around? Assembling a shitty rock band? Performing with strippers? Some kind of unique business opportunity? He talked for years about wanting to perform overseas or hosting fan events but right now these things are offlimit anyway. Why couldn't he at the very least explain his decision properly? Just that alone will definitely hurt his further career in the long run. The press-conference lasted 2 hours but it answered none of the questions that really mattered and there was no remorse. Though at this point, I can't trust anything he says anyway. He created his Twitter account the the evening it all went down and didn't bother explaining himself. He just jumped off the ship and let other people deal with the damage.

Even now, it all seems like some kind of bad dream. Then again, all of the 2020 does.

When I first saw "手越退社" trending on Twitter back in May I felt like I was spinning into a downward spiral, like all air was sucked out of me. And it wasn't the "oh, no! what will the band do?" I never went to a NEWS concert and never brought any merch. To me, it wasn't really the feelings of a fan whose band faces a crisis but rather that of an entrepreneur who invested too much money into one asset and watched it plummet.

Fandom stuff is a currency that can devalue in a blink of an eye. Its valuable as long as its core message is intact. This is why I can't stand people being petty over scans or videos. I share when I can knowing it will make someone happy because I know that tomorrow that someone might move on. When I stumble upon old closed journals with password-protected downloads they feel like ancient abandoned temples. The treasures in them turned to dust.

4nin NEWS were based on unity, the combination of 4 unique characters. Four components, each of them essential. Now that concept failed. It's like standing in front of a collapsed building. I try to assess the damage. How much of it can I salvage? Repurpose? How much is lost and needs to be cleaned up? Should I even bother?

What do I do with hundreds of live performances and TV shows, in HD, lovingly downloaded and stored?

What to make of thousands of scans, magazines, pamphlets, almost each image edited and sorted? Thousands more stored neatly in folders, waiting to be posted. Countless screens and gifs.

What of the member ai fanvideos that gained over 100k on Youtube bringing joy to so many people? I already got the first heartbroken comment saying "we won't ever see them like that again, will we?"

What to make of my unfinished stories? Honestly, it's one of the things I'm most proud in my entire life. Now their future is uncertain.

Do I take down the poster on my wall? The CDs on my shelf? Soon I will have to looks at my enormous stash and decide for each item. Things that once brought joy now cause pain.

NEWS weren't selling music, they were selling ideas and dreams. The cute band photos now cause hurt and anger. The uplifting songs about unity won't be convincing. All the concerts lost their charm.

Am I being too dramatic? Probably. Perhaps the issue itself may seem trivial to an outsider but our grief is real.

Tegoshi keeps saying he loves NEWS and adores the members. But to me, loving is doing everything you can to avoid hurting the ones you love. Perhaps he means it, but that love will never compare to the love he has for himself. Despite what he says, I doubt we'll even see them together again and I'm not even sure I want to. I knew apart from Koyashige, the members aren't really that close personally. Tegoshi is shallow and seeks popularity more than anything. I'm sure than now he'll hang out with even shadier characters than before. The members used to provide him with the much needed tough love. Now, with nothing and noone holding him back, he'll give in to his overblown ego.

I'm not sure how I feel about NEWS continuing as 3. I mean, I support their decision and that's probably what most fans want but to me, I don't know if it'll work out that well. They were already a band with a lot of luggage and now, just like in 2011, they are a band that induces pity. They would have to rearrange so much to try and fill this huge gaping hole. Not to mention they will struggle vocally. No songs, no choreography can be unaltered. It might be better to go on within the agency doing their own things. But then that would just mean Tegoshi was indispensable and all the work they put in will be wasted. The Story must be competed.

In the past week I went through various stages of grief. The anger was strong and so was disbelief. Now it's finally subsiding, giving way to acceptance. It won't come soon but I'll let all the emotions run their course. The fact is Tegoshi remains very entertaining and the temptation to keep following him and rant about him is strong. I probably wouldn't even fight it if he were to leave with at least a shred of dignity. But with the way things are, I refuse to support him in any way. And I will at least try to phase him out as much as I can as I realize that even my anger is playing into his hands as he wants nothing more than attention, good or bad. Instead, I'll try to focus on those who do deserve support.

I'm not yet sure how to proceed with the blog and everything else but I'll take my time and figure it out. The truth is Tegoshi was one of the two major things that have kept me here for so long. And no, the second reason is not Shige. It's the people. Out of all the fandoms I've been in over the years this one really felt like home. I met so many amazing people here, even though many of them have since moved on. I felt accepted and appreciated.

This week has been an emotional roller-coaster. But today I feel fine. I have a dozen reasons to be depressed. But I'm not miserable right now because of the fandom. I've had about 10 people write to me within several days. Some of them I haven't talked to in months, some I've never talked to before, and some from other fandoms. They reached out to share their thoughts and feelings, and I appreciate it so much. I felt less alone. I felt a sense of solidarity, a sisterhood. Many agreed with me and it was touching but even more touching were the people who didn't necessarily agree with me and still wanted to hear what I had to say.

Perhaps it's patronizing but I feel like right now the best I can do is stay connected and go through this together. If I can help others, through informing, making someone smile, or supporting emotionally, it's all worth it.

#musings

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jinmukangwrites · 5 years

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Caged Bird

Prompt

Summary: The desert is a heartless place, and traveling unprepared is about the worst thing you can do. Good thing Wild has some friends.

Warnings: mentions of non consensual drug use. Not much else. It's not even that angsty. What a rarity!!!

Notes: once again I stuff a hc into a prompt it has no business being in. Oh well. This one is a popular hc, so I'm sure you'll enjoy it. I've been wanting to write a fic about it for awhile.

-o-o-o-o-

Twilight is missing. It's been twenty-four hours, Twilight is missing, and Time is losing his mind. A lot can get done in a day, especially in the hands of Wild's Hylia forsaken Yiga Clan. He can't stop thinking about it as they search for Twilight, for the Yiga hideout, what can be done to Twilight. Even the slowest of tortures only need a few hours to begin showing effects. Wild insists that the Yiga aren't interested in torture and killing, there is only one person who they want to do that to and he's not the one who's been taken. They'll just keep Twilight locked away, as a trap to get to Wild. He won't be harmed.

Time has a hard time believing it, especially since Wild seems to be saying these things to convince himself more than the others. Time will admit he's also a worry wart and will worry about Twilight whether or not there's proof that he's okay.

When Twilight was first captured, it was after an ambush. They had been attacked by monsters on the way through the canyons to Gerudo Desert and Twilight got injured. The were low on healing supplies so when a man offered to help them they didn't question too much. Time knew he should have listened to that gut feeling he had that the man wasn't all the he seemed, especially when he insisted he needed privacy to tend to Twilight's wound. Even Wild looks a bit apprehensive about it, but Twilight, bleeding out yet still somehow hopeful, said he'll be fine and not to worry.

Then hours passed and Time couldn't take the waiting with no word anymore. He marched up to the cart the man had taken Twilight inside and found it bare, a note with the simple words "You know what we want, Hero" and the drawing of a distorted Sheikah symbol drawn on to it sat in the middle of the floor.

When he told the group, Wild looked like he had been about to grab the slate and teleport to wherever the Yiga hideout was and offer himself as trade at that second, but he thankfully listened to Time when he said they needed to stay together to have a better chance of taking these guys down. Unfortunately, the slate only worked to teleport one person, so they all had to walk as quickly as they could into the desert as the moon reaches its highest point.

There is not a single member of their group not shivering by the time they reach the canyon leading into enemy territory. With most of the group used to warm weather, only Wild, Sky, and Legend ended up prepared for the chill that pierced through skin and bones. Wild thankfully had an extra tunic and lended it to Four, whose small body was shivering within seconds. The rest were forced to wear multiple layers of clothes.

"A small group of us can go in," Wild says as he glares at the surrounding cliff walls, looking for any kind of movement, "sneak in and grab Twilight. The holding cell isn't far from the front door."

"How much experience do you have with this place?" Time asks. Wild looks down from the cliffs and at the ground.

"Too much."

It is decided Wild, Hyrule, and Time would be the ones to sneak into the hideout, with them being the stealthiest in the group. That left Four, Sky, Warrior, Wind, and Legend to stay behind as backup, ready to leap the moment Wild gives Wind the signal through the Sheikah Slate to the necklace Wind wears around his neck. A very useful tool of communication.

They head off, nothing but the sound of their footsteps on the loose, gravelly sand to accompany them. The moon is starting to lower and the temperature rises dramatically, a bad omen of what's to come when the sun rises.

"They don't have many people on watch," Wild whispers, yet in the secluded canyon with an endless amount of ambush opportunities awaiting them, his voice seemed too loud. "We may have to fight one or two of them, but they won't alert the rest until we're actually inside."

"It would still be best not to be spotted," Time says and Wild nods. Hyrule walks besides them with his jaw set in determination.

They chose to walk in silence from then on, to lessen the chances of being spotted, but Time knows better. The Yiga know they're coming. The know Wild is coming. They'll be prepared, if they're smart of course. Time would have soldiers waiting in every nook and cranny, he'd have the hostage where he could see them, he'd make sure he gets what he wants.

Images of Twilight bloodied and tortured flashed in his mind and Time has to physically shake his head to be rid of them. Wild says the Yiga aren't interested in hurting anyone other than Wild. He has to believe that, or at least consider that the first possibility else he will completely break down. Twilight is fine. He's probably in a cell sitting back and waiting for rescue. Not a single scratch on him.

He tries not to think about the previous wound Twilight has gotten and if it has been treated or not.

Wild takes the lead the closer they get to the hideout. He crouches down and silently moves to a large boulder by the cliff wall and takes out his Sheikah slate. There's a faint blue glow as strange pixels and characters surround his body and in the blink on an eye, Wild is wearing something very similar to what the Sheikah wear. To what Sheik wore.

Except... It is pink.

In his hands are two bottles filled with a thick purple looking substance. Time gets a bad feeling that Wild expects them to drink it.

"Unless you have something of your own that makes you stealthier, you should drink this," Wild whispers, confirming Time's fear.

Hyrule wrinkles his nose and is the first to reach towards the potion. He opens his mouth but Wild quickly cuts him off.

"You don't want to know what it's made of."

Time has to remind himself that Twilight is in danger before he reaches towards the potion. When he opens the lid a stench that smells as bad as the potion looks wafts up towards his nose and he almost gags. Besides him, Hyrule pinches his nose and takes the contents down in one swallow, like a shot. He blinks a couple times and then grins. "That doesn't taste half bad."

"Right?"

Time rolls his eyes and takes his share. He almost throws up, yet he also feels more… sneaky. When they begin to creep towards the hideout once again, Time realizes he can barely even hear his own breathing. Both Wild and Hyrule seem to blend into the surroundings despite Hyrule's green tunic and Wild's bright pink, he only knows they're there because he's seen them just a few seconds ago. Granted, they're not invisible, just… it seems the suit and the potions make it a bit harder for them to be noticed. They're more easily slipped over by the eye. Time wishes he had this when he was going through the Gerudo fortress so long ago. Really would have helped…

Wild grabs both Time and Hyrule by the upper arms to get their attention, and when he sees both pairs of eyes on him he points forward to the approaching end of the canyon. Time can see strange statues lining the jutting cliffs with the warped Sheikah design drawn on talismans and hung around the faces. Ropes hung high and low like a system of clothing lines with red papers draping down. Time doesn't have to ask, he knows that now it gets hard.

Wild leads them forward and they follow carefully, hugging the face of the wall. It's clear that Wild has, in fact, snuck around here multiple times if by the way he moves is any indication. He knows exactly where to step and what areas have the smallest chances of allowing them to be seen. In a few minutes time, they are right at the doorstep of the hideout without having met a single enemy.

Time doesn't know whether that's because Wild knows exactly what he's doing or if it's because there's something awaiting them inside. Judging by the way Wild's eyebrows are slightly pulled together, Time won't place his bet on the former.

They walk inside, the walls tower over them and Time can't help but marvel at the architecture, but his anxiety sparks when they reach a large, circular room. A dead end.

"What now?" Hyrule asks, he's showing no effort at hiding his panic and confusion. Wild ignores them and walks towards one of the sections of walls hidden behind a large tapestry.

"On the other side of this," he says as he pulls out an arrow and sets it alight, "could be an army."

"Doesn't matter," Time finds himself saying. "Twilight's there."

Probably hurt. Probably confused. Probably in pain. If the way Hyrule nods and pulls out his sword or the way Wild takes a deep breath is anything to go by, they're thinking the exact same thing.

"The cell is straight up the staircase. If we're lucky, that's where Twilight is." Wild gives them a half smile, as if trying to give them a bit more moral.

"And if he's not?" Hyrule asks.

Wild is silent for a second before he touches the arrow to the tapestry. The flames instantly clutch to the fibers and travel up silent and efficient. "If he's not, I have some bananas."

Time doesn't ask what that means.

Time almost passes out from the sheer amount of relief that courses through his body the moment they get up the staircase. Twilight is there. Time can see him lying there on his side, face turned towards the hard stone floor, halfway obscured by the wooden bars of the cell. It's too far to tell, but he looks unharmed. There's no red. There's nothing indicating injury. If fact, it looks like the Yiga has actually wrapped up Twilight's wound. It seems that the Yiga really are just interested in killing one person.

There's no guards, no anything. It's a clear shot to the cell and even Wind, the most reckless of their group, could tell that that doesn't bode well at all, if he were here of course. Time and the others stand still across the short expanse of room, it's agonizing. He can see Twilight, they've found him, but something is wrong, or well, he knows what's wrong just not why.

The lack of guards is at the top of the "something's wrong" list, how Twilight isn't moving is number two.

Hyrule shuffled over to the ledge to their left and looks over. He shakes his head and shrugs. No guards down there either.

Time can see Wild visibility swallow before he sneaks forward. He holds a hand back, telling Time and Hyrule to stay there. Time almost argues, but he also knows that Wild has done this before. Wild knows the entire layout and most of what can go wrong. He's the most experienced, and just because Time is yearning towards grabbing Twilight himself and getting the hell out of there doesn't give him the right to step on Wild's toes and potentially mess everything up.

It's probably a good thing Time and Hyrule stayed behind, because right when Wild gets a few feet from the cell, a swirl of tailesmens and an excited laugh announces the arrival of one of the dreaded assassins. Wild jumps backwards and instantly has a sword pulled out as a Yiga Clan assassin appears right between him and the cell.

He's tall, Time thinks. Big, muscular, and weilding a pretty wicked looking sword. Time tenses and is about to sprint out, but Hyrule stops him. His lips open, mouthing words.

They haven't noticed us.

More Yiga appear, there are two hanging out in the cell, dangerously close to Twilight, and another three outside the cell, standing in front of Wild, pointing arrows and raising scythe-esque weapons threateningly.

"Welcome, hero," the tall one says. His voice is deep, surprisingly deep. The other Yiga are all smaller, yet their laughs at those two words are just as intimidating as the big one. "I take it you're willing to trade?"

"I want proof he's okay," Wild says. His voice is calm. Dangerously calm. Like there's a storm about to hit.

One of the enemies inside the cell chuckles and roughly kicks Twilight in the gut. Twilight lets out a groan and curls in on himself. Wild seems to visibly relax while Time tenses up more. Just wait until these guys get a taste of his mind. Oh they'll be sorry.

He doesn't realize he's verbally growling until Hyrule slaps his shoulder, thankfully both noises are hidden by the laughter that sounds in the room.

Wild drops his sword and lifts his hands up in surrender. "You promise you'll let him go if I give myself up?" Wild asks.

Time's eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "What is he doing?"

"Watch," Hyrule whispers, grinning.

So Time does.

The faces of the assassins are obscured by masks, but the grin on the big ones face can be heard as he steps forward, hands twitching with excitement. "Of course."

The others approach too, to do what Time doesn't know. And he will never know, because the moment they get close enough, Wild snaps.

Lightning surges from out of nowhere, Time can feel it run up his spine to the base of his skull, filling the very air with electricity. The Yiga scream as green bolts of pure fury rain down upon them. It only lasts a few seconds, but it's enough for Wild to pick up his sword and slice at the leader across their chest as they're still dazed. Wild drops down when an arrow flies past his head. Wild is outnumbered and he's probably majorly pissed off every Yiga assassin in the room, but his also grinning wide enough to crinkle his eyes. He turns before anyone else can make an offensive move against him and launches himself off the platform onto the ground below. He sprints off with a sarcastic solute.

"Get him!" The big Yiga screams, his chest is bleeding but he seems too angry to care.

With the rustling of paper and laughs that can only be described as a hound dogs call, Time and Hyrule are left alone.

Time rushes forward with Hyrule following close behind not even a heartbeat later. He doesn't know what Wild's just done with the lighting or whatever, but he does know that that's not important right now. What's important is that Wild looked confident enough to take on the whole base, and he's left the path to the holding cell wide open.

There's an explosion deep inside the building that shakes the floor as Time grabs onto the wooden bars and forces the cell open. Twilight is still, not reacting at all, which is not a good sign. Time lowers himself down and cuts the rope holding Twilight's hands together behind his back and then lifts him up so he's somewhat sitting against Time. His body is like a ragdoll, limp.

Twilight blinks lazily, his eyes not quite focusing. Time can feel his heart painfully tug because something is not right. He puts a hand against Twilight's cheek and Twilight seems to lean into it.

"Pup?" Time asks. Hyrule bends down and he instantly goes to the bandages wrapping around Twilight's chest.

"Hmmm?" Twilight asks. He blinks more and it takes a few seconds for his eyes to finally somewhat focus. He opens his mouth and says a word, it sounds close to Time's name but it's all slurred and mumbled with groggy vocal chords. His pupils are dialating.

"Hey, pup," Time says again. Besides them, Hyrule is now checking the wound, it's surprisingly stitched up and looking good. Something else is making Twilight woozy.

The sound of another explosion meets their ears. Wild must be having a field day, and while Time has complete faith in Wild's abilities as a hero, he knows that the longer they stay in the cell the bigger chance they have of getting caught.

"Okay, up we go," he grunts and slings Twilight's limp arm around his shoulders. Twilight is forced to his feet as Time struggles to lift his dead weight, Hyrule quickly takes the other arm and lessen the load.

Twilight doesn't even bother to get his legs working beneath him, and if the way his head is lolling like a bobble head says anything, he probably wouldn't be able to help them walk even if he were coherent enough to. Hyrule shoots Time a worried look and Time sets his face in grim determination. Get to safety first, then check what's wrong with his charge.

The walking goes by slowly, too slowly. Time feels like he's barely managing to go a snail's pace. All he wants to do is more thoroughly check over the pup and then return to the hideout to help Wild burn it down, but at this rate Wild is going to burn it down himself and come out the help them before they can reach the others. Time readjusts his grip on Twilight's arm and pushes himself forward. Hyrule is panting, and Time realizes he is too. The back of his neck is burning with the rising sun, he's almost surprised with how much time has passed.

He pushes forward.

Finally, finally, they reach the others, and thankfully they all run up to help take the weight of Twilight's limp body. Time thinks Twilight fell asleep, he's not sure, he's too busy grabbing at the straps of his armor and letting them drop to the ground before he lifts the undershirt above his head.

He's hot. He's so hot, the sun is smoldering and the shade by the cliffs hardly do anything to help. The rest have also stripped their clothes and have moved closer to the shade, dragging Twilight along with them. He leaves his armor where it is, the thought of going back is forgotten when he sees Twilight isn't responding to the slight slaps to the face from Warrior. Time stumbles forward and drops down into the sand and sees that Twilight is just staring, nothing else, just looking at the sky or something further away with no reaction towards his comrades.

"What's wrong with him?" Legend asks.

"He looks drunk," Wind replies. Time is too worried to ask Wind how he knows what drunk looks like.

"He's not drunk," Warrior says and sits back onto his legs. His face is grim. "He's drugged."

"What kind of drug?" Time asks. He ignores the way his stomach seems to tie itself into a knot. Drugs… drugs are dangerous, and judging by the way Twilight is completely uninterested in the land of the awake, he's as high as a cloud.

Warrior shrugs. "It's Wild's Hyrule, it can be anything. I don't recognize it."

Time looks away towards a city in the distance, dancing like an illusion from the heat of the rising sun. That's their best bet for help, but it's so far away and the heat of the desert alone will kill them before they make it, nevermind any possible monsters.

Yet, a miracle happens right then. In the distance, Time sees sand being kicked up by a small creature swimming through the sand as if it were water. There are multiple of them, and behind each are taller figures with flaming red hair. The Gerudo warriors skid to a halt next to the group and dismount the strange seal creatures. Time stands up and walks forward to greet them.

"Look what we have here," one of the Gerudo women says. Her skin is as dark as chocolate and her eyes blaze gold. She looks weary of them, but also confident, wearing an easy going smirk.

"Our friend," Time explains, he moves so the can get a clear shot of Twilight, "he was taken from us by the Yiga Clan, we came here to rescue him."

Another Gerudo snorts. "You aren't dressed for the desert," she says, "you're lucky we were told you'd be here."

The third Gerudo drops a heavy looking bag onto the sand, bringing up a small cloud. Time remains where he is, confused. He looks towards the others and they're just as lost as he is, so he turns back to the warriors and clears his throat.

"Told... we'd be here?" He asks.

"Yes," the first one says. "By our little Hylian Vai. Ah, There she is now."

She looks past the group and Time follows her gaze towards where a figure dressed in blue silk is running down the canyon towards them. Time recognizes the scars on her body, her long hair, her blue eyes. The outfit she wears also sparks a vague memory in the back of Times head.

"Sav'otta, friend!" The Gerudo calls.

The girl… it has to be Wild… waves and calls back. "Sav'aaq."

His voice is surprisingly feminine, and Time would love to go and get more information, but Twilight is a matter of more importance. Wild seems to think so too judging by the way he stills when he sees the pup.

Time turns to the Gerudo, knowing now that Wild has somehow called them over and has decided to trust them completely. "He's mostly unharmed, we think he's drugged."

One of the Gerudo nods and hefts a bag over her shoulder before she strides over to Twilight. The others scoot slightly away to give her room to work, but not enough that she can do whatever she wanted without them watching. It seems Time isn't the only one a tad bit weary to let Twilight of their sight.

"There's heat proof clothes in the bag," the third Gerudo says and Time turns towards where the bag is discarded on the ground. "If you want to travel the desert, you'll need them. Don't worry about paying us back, it's the least we can do for our little bird. We also have way too much Voe clothes to handle, so really you're doing us a favor."

While the Gerudo tend to Twilight, Time and Wild both step forward to dig through the pile of clothes. "Got into Gerudo Town the same way I did, huh?" Time says, grinning slightly. Wild shoots him a glare, but Time can see the small blush forming on his cheeks.

They pass out the clothes to the others and quickly change. The heat of the sun instantly seems to go away, allowing their skin to feel the surprising cool breeze.

The Gerudo tending to Twilight identifies the drug as a pretty tame one, the only side effects Twilight has to look forward to is some natural nausea and shakiness when it starts to wear off. For now, all they can do is make sure he doesn't overheat.

"We can escort you to the Kara Kara Bazaar. Since you are Voe, we cannot allow you into our city."

"That's alright," Time says, "you've already helped us a lot. We do not wish to impose more than what we already are."

"It's not problem," one Gerudo says. She steps forward and slings her arm over Wild's small body. "For our little bird? Almost anything."

-o-o-o-o-

The cold air running through the in at the Kara Kara Bazaar is a blessing on so many levels. Even with the Voe armor, the heat of the sun still eventually managed to latch it's scalding fingers onto their skin. There's not a single member of the group that's not sunburned in some way, but Wild thankfully manages to make some potions to chase away the worst of it. They thank they three Gerudo women and they reassure them that it's no issue to help the friends of their little bird, and then they ride off before the other men at the Bazaar can try to mob them.

Twilight is laid down on one of the inn beds and Time sits besides him on a chair he has pulled up, he's sleeping somewhat peacefully. He woken up in the middle of their journey spilling the contents of his stomach everywhere as his body slowly cleansed out the drug. He's been given a small dosage of a health potion a Gerudo warrior had with her and then passed out not long after. He should wake up with a hell of a hangover, but he'll be clean of the drugs. Time can't be more thankful for that, it could have been worse.

Time sighs and brushes at the hair sticking to Twilight's forehead from the sweat. It could have been so much worse.

"I'm chopped some melon," Wild's voice says. Time pulls his hand away from Twilight to see Wild approaching, still dressed in the beautiful blue silk, in his hands is a tray of cut fruit. "Was wondering if you wanted some, it'll cool you down."

"Sure, and while I eat, you can explain some things."

Wild blushes slightly but hands Time a melon anyway. Time takes a bite into the surprisingly cold fruit as Wild pulls up his own chair.

"After I fought the Yiga, I used my slate to go back to Gerudo Town to ask for help. Then I came back to make sure you guys were out. Simple as that," Wild says. His hands are wringing around each other in his lap, and he's looking down, not making eye contact.

While Time was wondering about that, both he and Wild know that's not what he meant. He gives Wild a look and Wild sighs.

"It feels… natural," he... she says, her breath barely above a whisper. "Better... Right. Especially here."

Time smiles and places his hand on Wild's shoulder. "It's alright. You look comfortable in your own skin."

Wild gives a half relieved, half nervous laugh before she turns to where Twilight still lays. "I didn't know if you guys would… how you would react, so I've kept it hidden. But, back at the hideout, I knew that your opinion of me wouldn't matter at all if you all died in the sun. It feels good, though. Everyone has said they're okay with it besides…"

Time smiles and looks back towards his charge. "He'll always accept you, no matter what. We all will."

"I know, it's still… a bit…"

"Nerve wracking?"

"Yeah."

"He will always accept you, and if he doesn't, he has me to answer to."

#jin writes #fan fiction #linked universe #hero of the wild #hero of time #fan fic #hero of twilight #hero of warriors #legend of zelda #hero of legend #hero of the four sword #hero of the wind #hero of hyrule #hero of the sky #we all know twi accepts her #gender fluid wild

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sanctuaryforalluniverses · 5 years

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Getting inside Danny Williams’ brain, movie edition (“Partners” DVD extras)

For those of us who write fanfiction, one of the weird world-filling-in activities we sometimes have to do is try to come up with a comprehensive list of a character’s preferred leisure time activities. Sometimes they’ll give us hints on the show, but in most cases the show focuses far more on what they do at work than what they do during their off hours. Fanfiction, on the other hand, is often written about a character’s off hours, leaving us writers to gather clues and try to extrapolate from there.

Which is how I ended up having a very weird weekend trying to come up with a definitive list of movies I was certain Danny would really like. Because I honestly don’t think he’s a huge movie watcher (his go-to “crap there’s nothing on TV” option is usually sports of some kind) but he’s got too much movie knowledge not to appreciate the medium at least a little. Unlike Steve, Danny’s response to being forced through several different romance movies was to analyze them, deconstruct the various tropes, and learn to predict them in other movies. Casual viewers, in my experience, just don’t DO that.

Also, the one movie we know he loves, “Enemy Mine,” is a freakin’ classic.

The thing is, though, that it’s kind of a weird classic. For those who haven’t had the pleasure of experiencing the movie for themselves, “Enemy Mine” is a 1985 West German-American science fiction film starring Dennis Quaid and Louis Gossett, Jr. The two are pilots on opposite sides of an interstellar war, and they both crash land on the same planet. They hate each other, slowly become friends, and when Gossett’s character dies in childbirth (his species can reproduce all by themselves), Quaid’s character promises to take the kid back to Gossett’s home planet for a naming ceremony. He raises the kid for awhile, accidentally gets “rescued” and taken away from him, and steals a ship to get the kid back.

Unsurprisingly, the movie was a total box office bomb. That’s what tends to happen when a movie is really, really, good, but also completely fails to follow any conventional box office formula for success. If you boil it down to its bare essentials, “Enemy Mine” is about talking, aliens, and feelings. There’s a solid chunk of sci-fi fans who are fond of it, and count it AMONG their favorites, but it’s pretty rare for someone who isn’t a fan of sci-fi to like it. Let alone love it as much as Danny clearly does.

And Danny… there’s no way I’m buying a secret fondness for sci-fi. Someone in his life must have been a fan (I’m suspecting Matt, who I imagine must have been a big fan of escapism) but that man is so non-nerd he couldn’t casually come up with SUPERMAN when trying to put a name to his red-caped “costume” in the season 3 Halloween episode. I hadn’t even thought that was POSSIBLE. (He manages a reference much later in the series, but that’s after DC’s latest spate of movies. The marketing saturation was so dramatic at that point anyone who consumed even the most casual media couldn’t escape it).

Feelings, however… Danny’s a BIG fan of feelings. He was so openly moved when we saw him watch “Enemy Mine,” and he would ABSOLUTELY be one of those people who enjoyed sobbing over movies because he could never let himself cry in real life. Also, the man is a deeply emotional, deeply sentimental asshole, no matter how hard he tries to pretend he’s a tough guy. So if he’s going to seek out a movie on his own, it’s probably going to have to offer the same dialed-up-to-11 emotional catharsis that “Enemy Mine” does.

Also, he clearly doesn’t mind movies where the characters spend most of their time just talking to each other. Hell, he probably even loves it.

On that note, here’s a not-comprehensive-but-definitely-reliable list of some of Danny Williams’ most-watched movies, in no particular order.

Arrival

This one… Danny has to save this one for special occasions. The things the movie says about parenthood and consciously letting your heart get broken because of the sweetness along the way hits him right in the heart every single time, but there’s also a dead kid involved. Yes, she’s sort of at the edges, but we also get Amy Adams talking to her dead daughter in voiceover and it just wrecks Danny EVERY SINGLE TIME. Some of the things the movie says about choices and accepting pain also mess him up, but it touches on some deeper issues and he really doesn’t like to look at any of that too closely. It’s a beautiful, well-made movie (he WILL rant about how Adams deserved an Oscar for it), but sometimes he just can’t allow himself to get emotionally wrecked like that.

Steve only sort of understands why he gets so emotional over it. But every time they watch it together, he keeps his arms around Danny the entire time and doesn’t say a word about any tears he sees.

Beaches

Listen – I will physically fight anyone who tries to tell me this isn’t one of Clara Williams’ favorite movies. I am dead certain she watched this ALL THE TIME when Danny was growing up, and I’m sure he’s told several people that he suffered through it. But listen – lifelong friendship, massive weepiness, AND New Jersey? Danny loves this movie nearly as much as his mother does, and will absolutely watch it any time it happens to be on TV. He’s seen it so many times he can actually recite the lines of some of the big scenes along with the movie, but is careful not to let himself do that too often.

Steve absolutely teases him about this one, but if Grace catches him watching it she’ll sometimes sit down on the couch and watch it with him. Like her father, she also likes the movie far more than she’s willing to admit to, and is the one person Danny will actually let himself say the lines with (she does it with him). For the funeral scene and the bits after, Grace will inevitably get weepy and snuggle up close to her father.

Gifted

This one is just super obvious. In the movie, Chris Evans spends the entire movie figuring out how to raise his adorable super-gifted niece despite pressure from nearly everyone to give her up, and in between tries and fails to have some kind of dating life. It’s a celebration of the fathering spirit, and Danny relates HARD to it. It doesn’t get him as teary as some of the other ones, but there are enough emotional moments to leave him satisfied.

Who DOESN’T cry during Carl and Ellie’s life together at the beginning of the movie? Danny found this one when Grace was still young enough that Disney made up a huge portion of her movie diet, but he’s stuck with it even though she hasn’t. He’s actually grown to like the movie more and more over the years, and what he hasn’t realized yet is because it’s really closely tied to the fact that he got dragged to Hawaii the year after the movie came out. The idea of a curmudgeon traveling to a hellish wilderness in the middle of nowhere and finding a family and new purpose in life when he gets there just started RESONATING with him for some reason, you know?

Bonus movie that Danny USED to watch all the time and now just can’t anymore: Ghost

Honestly, “Ghost” used to be one of his go-to movies. It’s got nearly the feels-per-minute ratio of “Beaches,” and is slightly less embarrassing for a grown man to be watching. Plus, Danny is a very intense, very specific kind of romantic, and the idea of a love that outlasted death appealed to him on a really fundamental level. Of course, he mentally classified as a fantasy, not so much because of the ghost as the idea that a married couple could actually love each other that much. But hey, who doesn’t enjoy a good fantasy now and then?

But after he and Steve got together… well, he’s TRIED to watch it in the years since. More than once, in fact. But it’s not long before he sees Patrick Swayze staying close to his wife, or trying to protect her from his murderous business partner, and thinking about how Steve would absolutely do that if he could manage it at all. Or he’ll see Demi Moore having such a tough time after her husband dies, and he can’t help but think about how destroyed he’d be if anything happened to Steve. If any of the close calls he’s had over the years were just a little bit closer. How easy it would be, even with Steve being more careful, for someone to shoot him one day.

Ever since then, he hasn’t ONCE managed to watch the movie all the way through. Eventually, he just stopped trying.

#danny williams #h50 #mcdanno #partners verse #h50 fic

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vrainsrewatch · 5 years

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episode 8 thoughts

i was gonna watch later, since i’ve got other things to do, but i burnt the shit out of my hands making hot chocolate like an idiot so i watched an episode first LOL.

this episode starts out with that really strong fairy tale scenery i absolutely adore, with yusaku and ai trying their hardest to get blue angel to wake up.

i seriously could talk about the imagery in this scene for days lmao. i love the sleeping beauty aesthetic, but i also really love the colors. LV goes through so many different color palettes through the series, but i love the purples and blues of this area here. i’m not sure if the intention was to make blue angel seem like she was meant to be there, while in contrast playmaker stands out due to his hair, but i seriously replayed this section twice because it looked so nice.

i have a lot to say about this episode, and it will also be my most screenshot heavy post so far lol, so once again, buckle up!

this episode starts to really build up yusaku as a character - his sense of justice, his core values, etc etc. on top of that, it takes its time to flesh out akira, and to show his worse qualities, which we’ll get into in a minute.

first, though, is one of my favorite awkward exchanges in the series lmao:

i’m surprised he even caught onto what akira was getting at, tbh with y’all. vrains started out ship teasing yusaku/aoi really hard these episodes, but drop it almost completely up until the minimal tease we get in s3, which i find really funny. i was always really invested in them becoming friends, though, so while i’m happy we had that happen in s3, i would’ve really liked to see it happen earlier. not this early, though - yusaku’s nowhere near ready for that.

I HAD TOTALLY FORGOTTEN VYRA WAS HERE. yugioh hair makes it known that she’s going to be an important character, but i had really completely forgotten she was working as one of aoi’s doctors during this part lmao. i love this so much, actually.

moving onto everyone talking shit about blue angel on forums and stuff. this kinda shit:

would be really awful to deal with. it’s very real, though - cancel culture, anyone? but seriously, this is so brutal. on top of that, does this imply that she’s never really lost before? she is the number 2 charisma duelist in LV, so i wouldn’t be terribly surprised if that meant that she hadn’t really lost since starting to make it big as an idol. once again showing off how good of a duelist aoi actually is, even if the show makes her lose a lot. tbf, her loss/win ratio isn’t that bad looking at the other main girls - 5 wins, 5 losses on screen, and considering the kind of opponents she faced (soulburner, bohman, ai), that’s seriously not bad.

next up we get the chess pieces again, and boy howdy, does this conversation make me seethe.

i understand it’s partially a cultural difference thing, but i can’t help but get angry about it LOL.

i didn’t remember how often the chess pieces were actually utilized in these first few episodes, either. i guess i can understand why people were irritated they were just dropped, but i don’t really see them as a plot point, more like... just a kind of weird way to run a company? just show your faces and have normal meetings like everyone else, y’all don’t have to be so extra.

the akira/emma meeting is nice because it shows you more of emma’s character, but it also gives you more of akira’s stupider (and ruthless) side.

you don’t see him like this very often, but honestly, when you think about all the unsavory jobs he was doing to keep him and aoi afloat way back when, it kind of makes sense. even if he was originally a gentle person, you don’t last doing... any of the jobs he’s done, being that way. even a higher up in a company like SOL tech would have to be a bit harsher to get to that point imo. i don’t see a lot of people talk about this side of akira’s character tbh which makes me kind of sad.

also, seriously, he’s an idiot. how did he arrive at this conclusion? when he saw that it was aoi who was baiting him into the duel? no matter what direction i approach this from, i can’t understand how he ended up on that conclusion lol.

also, the worst father ever award goes to....

seriously! i hate that man so much lmao. to say that directly to your own child, on top of everything else...

it’s a nice look into revolver, too, though you wouldn’t know it at first glance. his reply says everything, though. he fully accepts his role in his father’s life and has an incredibly toxic attachment to him, and wants his approval more than anything. we never see him get physically abused by kogami or anything of the sort, but you can’t deny the mental anguish he must’ve been going through in order to keep on his father’s good side.

i know a lot of people like to say that revolver is kind of not a great guy, seeing the tower of hanoi arc, and how he probably should’ve went to jail etc etc but really, he was manipulated hard core. and extremely suicidal. i could really talk a lot about this all day, but i’ll cut myself off and instead say how much i love how vrains sets up revolver as a character. this, combined with “i’ll fulfill your wishes, father” from episode 3 gives you his motivations nice and clearly, but this specific scene also gives a bit of a hint as to where his character arc goes and what he has to work through. just thinking about this makes me so excited to get to 116 again lmao.

anyways, though. another excellent exchange comes up. seriously, lmao, ai being like “waaaah that’s illegal !!!!” and kusanagi’s just very casual

makes me laugh every time i see it. they are criminals, even if what they’re doing is for the greater good. they’re not exactly innocent here lmao.

then there’s the talk about the virus infecting her, and it’s a nice way to bring up how that works before the another arc comes up in.. a couple of episodes, right? tbh it’s the arc i remember the least about, so i’m looking forward to rewatching it.

actually though, the idea of viruses in LV being able to infect someone’s body is so, so interesting. i really, really wish they had done more with the whole LV/rl merge idea, but guess i’ll just have to write more fanfic instead lol.

i mentioned at the beginning of this post we get into yusaku as a character more here, and this is one of the lines that really made him interesting to me originally:

he has such a strong sense of justice, but what sets him apart from other ygo protags is that he is not defined by it. he’s not the classic, stereotypical do-gooder who gets caught up in something and has to make it right, his justice is more so that he is not okay with seeing other people hurt because of what happened to him. his justice is driven by his trauma, almost entirely.

revolver even brings it up this episode:

where he talks about how some rando wouldn’t have done them any good because it wouldn’t have been public enough. yusaku doesn’t really care about the little people, not in the same way, say, yugi would. it’s not that he wants them to be hurt or see them get hurt or anything, it’s just that unless it effects him directly, it’s not on his radar. but once he gets involved, he feels fully responsible.

while he didn’t plant the hanoi virus into her, he probably knows it was to intentionally draw him out thanks to ai (and the fact that he beats them up all the time). he feels fully responsible for what happened to her, and he’s prepared to do what is needed to make it right again.

i really like yusaku for this. i find those kinds of characters really interesting, and yusaku is no exception.

we get the whole emma/blue angel/yusaku scene, which is pretty sick tbh looking at it again - just shoot a church straight up from the ground for dramatic effect! - and i’ll bring up more of akira’s ruthlessness here.

seriously, this is not a line from someone who is just angry about his sister. and it’s also him being fuckin DUMB. playmaker willingly lets himself get caught into your trap, and he tells akira straight up what he has to do to save his sister - no sugar coating it, no trying to make it cryptic or difficult despite being caught in that hand and in that trap. he’s incredibly honest, and akira still does this lmao.

then it’s probably the wildest turn of events in all of vrains:

where’s that post that’s like, “remember when playmaker gets caught in a gothic looking church while he’s getting tormented by a giant demon hand controlled by his classmate’s brother and then his rival who he hasn’t met yet shows up in a lightning bolt to save him”? bc really LMAO what the fuck. it was so hype watching it the first time, and it’s still awesome watching it back.

and why is this never really??? brought up again later???? and when he leaves in that datastorm to go prepare to fight playmaker LMAO i know it’s supposed to look cool but the animation is so dorky, i love it.

more on yusaku, though. before playmaker goes to fight revolver, who he’s been gearing towards for awhile now, we get this exchange:

to which playmaker responds with “i don’t hate you. i only hate the knights of hanoi”. which is another really good moment for his early characterization and very, very consistent with his backstory that we find out in about 12 episodes.

everyone who wasn’t involved in the LI in any way just... exists to him. they’re completely neutral. if something happens to them because of him, he feels directly responsible, because he feels like he got them tangled up in a mess that nobody should be in. i mentioned that briefly earlier, but this really drives that point home.

he doesn’t even hate akira for torturing him mere minutes ago. because he’s been through worse. because akira was doing what he thought was right by his sister, no matter how stupid he was being.

and even more so than that, he’s not seeing this as fighting for akira. he feels responsible for blue angel, but also, here’s his chance to fight revolver. it’s a two birds one stone situation here for him.

anyways, i’m gonna stop myself there lol this is really long OOPS. gotta take care of a few things, and then onto the first rev vs playmaker duel!

#vrains #episode 8

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allthefilmsiveseenforfree · 5 years

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The Kitchen

Oh guys. Ohhhhh you guys. It’s been awhile, you know? It’s been awhile since I’ve knowingly seen a film with less than, say, 30% on Rotten Tomatoes, but sometimes I can be convinced! Gimme a great cast and as long as the movie’s not trying to be a comedy I’m willing to give it the good ol’ college try because at least I can usually find something to laugh at. So I went into The Kitchen fully expecting a less-than-stellar but no doubt perfectly adequate time at the cinema. You’ve got Oscar nominee Melissa McCarthy, prestige TV darling Elizabeth Moss, and breakout charisma machine Tiffany Haddish as three women taking charge of their husbands’ mob empire in 70s Hell’s Kitchen? What could go wrong??? Well...

Imagine watching a montage of every 70s era mob movie you can think of. Got it? Got it firmly in your head? You have now had the experience of watching this movie. It’s like it’s 1993 again and you’re fighting with your sister over the remote and one of you hits the fast forward button while the smell of Bagel Bites drifts through the rec room and as you’re struggling to get the remote back, the movie is unspooling in front of you, incoherent images and sudden jerky movements, and your mom yells at you to stop fighting or she was gonna take the movie back to Blockbuster and NO ONE was gonna get to watch it. It’s like that, but unfortunately someone DID watch the movie, and that someone was me.

Some thoughts:

So first of all, I’d like to say that I enjoy Tiffany Haddish as a person. She seems like a real delight, and I think she’s working her ass off to get hers in Hollywood, which is fantastic and I wish her all the success in the comedy world. That being said. There’s uh...there’s a lot of eyebrow acting going on here. Just. So many eyebrows doing so many things. And a lot of nodding. People don’t nod this much in real life. She’s acting in scenes across from Oscar nominee Melissa McCarthy and usually that would tend to elevate a performance but for some reason, it’s all nods and eyebrows and I just think maybe gritty dramatic acting is not going to be her next successful career move.

It’s not just her though. All the bit parts and character actors they hired to fill out the Hell’s Kitchen neighborhood feel like they’re rejects from the first 10 minutes of a Law & Order episode. At one point, an old married woman says “Ain’t that right, Sal?” to her husband and he shushes her by swatting the air in front of him and grumbling “AAAAH.” THIS HAPPENS TWICE IN THE SCENE. I’ve seen termites that chew through scenery less.

The overacting? Forgivable. The weak script? I could handle it. But the pacing of this movie is so relentlessly awful that it almost feels like performance art. There are - I counted - 3 scenes that last longer than approximately 90 seconds. Just imagine it. You’re watching a movie. You like the actors. The story’s ok. But something seems off. You don’t know what. The costumes are good. The performances are ok. The music is great. But something is wrong. It’s definitely wrong. Do you feel it? Is it bothering you? Have you had enough yet? Are you yearning for a descriptive sentence, an appositive phrase, anything with even one fucking comma in it to indicate a complex thought? Congratulations, now you know what it’s like to watch a 102-minute film that feels like it took 3 hours.

Let it never be said that I can’t find the silver lining amongst this pile of dreck! Domnhall Gleeson is a goddamn delight as a slightly unhinged, sleepy eyed mob assassin who came back to Brooklyn cause he heard Elizabeth Moss’s husband was in jail. In between making googly eyes at her, there is what is by far the funniest, weirdest scene in the movie in which he methodically explains how to dismember the dead body of an attempted rapist currently residing in Elizabeth Moss’s bathtub. This scene may be my favorite black comedy short film of the year.

Related: it’s fucked up but Gleeson is upsettingly attractive in this movie. These feelings are made even more complicated, because when he first shows up, I thought he was Elizabeth Moss’s estranged brother. But then they started making out and for a second I was having some VERY confusing feelings.

One thing the movie has in its favor - the soundtrack, while obvious, is banging. It’s 1978, if you don’t have a killer soundtrack it’s like you’re not even making an effort.

There are a few other shining spots. Melissa McCarthy does a fine job with the material she’s given. Elizabeth Moss at least seems to be having fun. It’s really not the actors’ fault that first-time director Andrea Berloff simply had no idea what to do with them.

On a related tangent, I would just like to point out that a criticism that is always levied towards works of art created by women and POC and queer folks and any other minority is that people only think it’s good just because the person belongs to that particular group. Well, I’m going to point to this film every single time someone tries to pull that bullshit ever again - I’m sure Andrea Berloff was trying her best, and there may have been unseen drama going on with the studio or during the production that led to this frenetic pile of polyester, but the end result is not at all better just because she’s a woman. I wanted to like this, I really did, but a poorly made film is a poorly made film no matter who’s behind the camera.

Case in point - my favorite scenes in the movie have nothing to do with the main characters, but instead focus on a group of rival mobsters in Brooklyn, led by an oily and perfect Bill Camp. His tete a tete with our main ladies is one of the three scenes allowed to be long enough to be, you know, interesting. Plus, he has an entourage of other Brooklyn mobsters with him, including the Jersey Shore-lite guy that Ann Perkins makes out with during the Harvest Festival in Parks and Rec, who has my favorite line in the whole movie. When he’s explaining to Melissa McCarthy that there’s a hit out on her and the gals, he explains how he knew - “I was in a bar......lookin at some titties...when he asked me.” “Asked you what?” “To kill you.” It’s his wide-eyed good cheer and sheepishly boyish grin that really sells it. I’ve been laughing about it for days.

Margo Martindale might be one of this generation’s finest character actresses, but she can’t do a New York Irish mob accent for shit.

Did I Cry? Oh god no. I should have - there’s major character death all OVER the place. But nah. I was still laughing about the titties.

I hate that I know how good this could have been. These women deserved better, and there are tiny seeds of interesting ideas going on, but ultimately everything falls flat.

If you liked this review, please consider reblogging or subscribing to my Patreon! For as low as $1, you can access bonus content and movie reviews, or even request that I review any movie of your choice.

#119in2019 #the kitchen #the kitchen movie #the kitchen 2019 #the kitchen review #melissa mccarthy #tiffany haddish #elizabeth moss #Domnhall Gleeson #bill camp #margo martindale #movie reviews #film reviews

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minijenn · 5 years

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Peridot and Pacifica Preview 1

alskdjalsdjlad well at least I fucking wrote something tonight ahahahah I’m so fuking tired send help anyway here’s this. Probs won’t write anything else for this until sunday since I’m gonna be busy all day tomorrow. RIP

“Special delivery!”

Caustically, Peridot glanced up from the drill’s blueprints she was looking over to find Steven standing before her, a small, wrapped box in his hands. Mabel stood alongside him, practically beaming with excitement as they both presented the green Gem with this unknown item.

“What are you doing?” the green Gem asked, raising an eyebrow as she looked between the pair.

“Weeelllll…” Mabel began, eagerly. “We were feeling kinda bad about throwing your lemon hancers-”

“Limb enhancers,” Peridot corrected pointedly.

“Yeah, those,” Mabel nodded. “Into the ocean when we poofed ya. Soooo…”

“So we thought we’d get you a little something to make up for it!” Steven finished, holding the box up to her. “We hope you like it!”

The green Gem still largely had no idea what they were offering her, but she took the box all the same, opening it to find a small, black, keyboarded device inside. “Its… a rectangle.”

“And a cell phone!” Steven quipped. “I found it all busted up in Amethyst’s room awhile back. Its kind of old, but we had Soos fix it up for you, so it should work just fine!”

“Ooooo…” Peridot’s formerly bored manner quickly dissolved as she accidentally turned the phone on, its bright, pixelated screen instantly catching her interest.

“You can work it by using those tiny keys,” Mabel informed, peeking over the green Gem’s shoulder. “You can call people, send texts, even play a few fun little games! It’s it great?”

“Plus, it even has wi-fi on it!” Steven added. “Which means you have the whole worldwide web to hang out on!”

“Worldwide?” Peridot scoffed. “Ha! With my finger screens, I had the ability to search and retrieve data across multiple star systems.”

“Hm… impressive…” Steven mused. “But I think we can do you one better… with TubeTube!”

The young Gem navigated to the video app on the phone, pulling up a popular cat video that baffled the green Gem as she squinted to properly watch it on the tiny screen. “Why was this documented…?”

“And even cooler than that, you can share whatever you’re thinking with the entire world!” Mabel exclaimed brightly. “Just as long as you keep it under 140 characters.”

“That’s so many people!” Peridot gasped, stars of amazement in her eyes as she continued tapping away on the phone. “I really, really like this. But it’s a shame it doesn’t come attached to your body like—oh wait!”

Without missing a beat, the green Gem rushed inside the barn, rummaging through what scraps were left inside it before hurrying back with a strap of velcro in hand. “Behold! My innovation!” Peridot proclaimed, fashioning the tape to the back of the phone before doing the same to her wrist. She quickly connected the two before pulling off a dramatic pose to show off her handiwork to the impressed pair. “I’ve harnessed the power of your interlocking fabric strips!”

“Um, not that that isn’t cool, Peridot,” Steven said with a small, bemused grin. “But it would have just been easier to put the phone in your pocket when you’re not using it.”

“…What’s a pocket?”

“Wow, you guys really just gave someone who doesn’t even know what pockets are a fully-functioning, web-enabled cell phone,” Dipper spoke up from his spot nearby as he continued leafing through the first journal, his tone absolutely deadpan. “Nice one.”

“Hmph, like I need to know what ‘pockets’ are,” Peridot scowled back at him. “What matters is I finally have cutting-edge tech again! Everything is finally all at my fingertips once more… What a wonderful feeling.”

“Yeah, a refurbished phone from five years ago,” Dipper said, still just as dour as he closed the journal. “That’s real ‘cutting-edge’ tech right there. Super advanced stuff.”

“Aw, c’mon, Dipper, let her have her fun,” Mabel interjected, grinning. “She’s been really good lately. She deserves a reward!”

“A reward?” Dipper scoffed incredulously, more or less ignoring the green Gem as Steven continued showing her how to use her new phone. “For the Gem who tried to kill us on multiple occasions? Who only came here to check on a ticking-time bomb of a Gem mutant buried under the crust of the Earth? Who fused with Bill Cipher? Are you and Steven actually insane?”

“No, we’re just being nice,” Mabel huffed, hands on her hips. “Maybe you should try it sometime, bro-bro.”

“I don’t have anything against being nice,” Dipper countered, crossing his arms. “But I do have a problem with being nice to Peridot. In case you haven’t noticed, Mabel, she’s not our friend. She’s barely even our ally. And its about time you guys realized that before you have to learn it the hard way.”

“Oh yeah?” Mabel countered. “Well, have you ever stopped to think that maybe Peri’s not as bad as you think she is? If you just gave her a chance, then maybe you’d see that, yeah, she might be sorta rude and loud and mean and cocky and-”

“And this is supposed to prove me wrong… how, exactly?”

“Point is,” Mabel cut in succinctly. “She’s still learning about Earth and about all of us. She wants to help us stop that Cluster thing. So why can’t we meet her halfway and help her learn?”

Dipper didn’t offer an answer to this as he instead glanced past his sister and over to the green Gem instead. Peridot noticed his stare and returned it with a sour glare of her own, one that more or less reaffirmed the mutual disdain they both had for each other. Disdain that, for the most part, neither of them were willing to give up so easily and so soon.

#sassy dipper is best dipper #anyway #jen writes #universe falls #uf preview #peridot and pacifica #it feels weird to be posting previews since i dont do previews on keys alskdjalkdjs\

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sponfawn · 5 years

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MTH - Him (Part 1)

This has been rolling around in my brain for a bit now. And since I am officially out of ideas for posts.... I think it's Time.

Him. Aside from Mojo Jojo, one of the most iconic villains in the Powerpuff Girls franchise as a whole, and certainly the most powerful. The reason the Boys were able to survive at all. And a heavy, yet relatively rare presence in TEF.

Despite being such an influential character even within the fic itself, Sbj handles Him with a very light, almost less-is-more touch that keeps Him true to form, yet unknowable. Fans of the original 1998 PPGs will recall that Him's only consistent motivation is his hatred of the Girls and his desire to mess with people's minds. A certain episode, Him's big plot is to give the Girls candy for their birthday so that they'd get cavities. Yet in another, the Girls travel through time and Him has taken over, the town is seriously dilapidated, and the people of Townsville are severely traumatized, minds and personalities twisted in disturbing ways. In MTH, Him seems to be somewhere in between these extremes, likely on the darker end of the spectrum but how far, only Sbj knows.

So what do we know? We know from (this post - linked in reblog) that Him was/is not a great coparent. We know that He probly has given Brick lectures on corporate Evil, and that He wanted the Boys to follow in Mojo and His footsteps. We know that Him had gotten the Boys caught in vortexes before (Butch says that Brick was never good with vortexes), that He was likely abusive. We know the Boys broke free when they were around 12. We know that Him disappeared for roughly 5 years. To the extent that until his first appearance, even Brick with his special connection couldn't sense Him. We know that so far, Him has only appeared three times, quite briefly, and only to Brick. We know that He claims the Vortex was left there absentmindedly, years ago, out of boredom. We know He loves His games and riddles. There are lots of things we don't know. Why did he go under the radar for so long? Was the Vortex actually unintentional? Is he really just chilling and occasionally sending something out to mess with Brick in particular, or does he have a big picture plan that we don't have all the pieces to yet?

I have several theories. First, I think the Boys breaking free of His grasp was a blow. I think Him took some time to nurse His wounds and a budding plan to screw them (especially Brick, the one who solved His "riddle") over. He waited and watched, knowing that someday He'd get His chance. I do wonder about Him's influence outside of Townsville. After the Boys left, Brick, with his newfound control over his life, began lucid dreaming. Him doesn't bother the Boys until they return to Townsville. Not even a peep. Then back in Townsville, Brick never involuntarily dreams again until his subconscious wins over his conscious mind, due to his feelings for Blossom. Aside from it being a symbol of Brick’s feelings of secretly wanting to give up control, I think the dream may also be a symbol of Him's plan slowly moving forward, setting up the trap to ensnare the Boys at least, if not the Girls as well. If Brick’s lucid dreaming symbolizes his freedom from Him, a non-lucid dream might symbolize Him’s encroaching influence. I think as twisted as Him is, He actually loved His Boys in a way. But you can't take from the Devil and expect to get away with it for good. Especially when one of you owes Him a debt. After all, in playwriting there's a saying that if you put a shotgun in Act 1, it has to go off in Act 3. And Boomer's musical talent is quite a fucking shotgun.

I know one “shotgun” and a revenge motive isn't definitive evidence for a plan existing, but there's more. Oh, is there more.

Him only appears to Brick. He only talks to Brick. Obviously that's in part cuz Brick is so easy and fun to mess with. But it also feels in some ways like misdirection. Let's say, misdirection with multiple purposes. Brick is the most likely to put pieces together, to be suspicious, to see the big picture - unless he's distracted with trivial, irritating visits from dear old Dad. Something I noticed awhile ago was that after each incident with Him (or one of Him's toys like the Vortex and his black blob), one of our colorful ships got closer. As a direct result of the first incident, Bubbles resolved her conflicted feelings for Boomer, and they got together. They went from flirty-but-just-friends to dating, within maybe an hour. It also messed enough with Brick, having to try to explain the blob's motives without admitting he had conflicted emotions, to be amusing. During the second incident, which had the primary effect of fucking with all the Boys' minds, especially Brick's, Buttercup began to come to terms more with how important Butch is to her. Literally, immediately after Buttercup starts dissociating and going hysterical, it cuts to Butch opening his eyes in the lab, Buttercup right at his side. They jump from platonic rough housing and gripping each other's arms for pain-tolerance after a brutal sparring match, to cuddling and holding hands while falling asleep next to each other.

Now this could just be a matter of using these events to develop characters, like a suspension bridge effect, but I honestly don't think Sbj wrote anything plot-wise that doesn't have a reason. Obviously, advancing the plot and developing characters is a reason, but when the supercomputer jet Brick designed attacked them, Darius was behind the scenes wanting to fuck with Brick. That incident really didn't bring anyone dramatically closer. When the Robo Jojo's attacked and shot antidote x, Mojo was obviously behind it to try to destroy the Girls. If anything, the immediate effect was that it drove the Reds apart, and Butch couldn't joke around Buttercup for awhile after that. The school shooters didn't bring anyone significantly closer. It made Blossom realize that Brick could be heroic, but the immediate effect wasn't profound. She was still with Chris, and he was still pissy about it. Yet both events involving Him ended with huge shifts in relationships.

While I don't necessarily think that Him could predict precisely what would've happened, I do find it suspicious that whenever He fucks shit up, it triggers enormous, sudden steps in relationship developments. Its a big reminder that Him knew exactly why the Girls and Boys were feeling conflicted when he sent the mist-blob. He knew Brick, Blossom, and Bubbles were all having mixed feelings of attraction and inhibition. (I'd mention Greens but they're both so dysfunctional with emotion recognition and expression that they're probly always conflicted in some way, even if only subconsciously, and at that point it wasn't even a matter of denial of attraction but of recognizing it). With the vortex, He knew about the dreams the Boys were having, knew about their subconscious fears and desires, knew how a vortex might twist them even if not in detail.

The only time He appears where His shenanigans aren't fucking with everyone, is at the Homecoming Game and at the hospital after the Vortex incident. Both times involve Brick. At Homecoming, Him visits Brick and morphs into Blossom to taunt him about his dream and his feelings, make his mind deal with the incongruency of the image and touch of Blossom, mixed with the logical understanding that it wasn't Blossom at all. Tempting, yet repulsing him. Stirring up awareness that he really fucking likes her. It could've been just to fuck with him, tease him a bit. But I can't help but notice that it's the VERY NEXT NIGHT that the Vortex incident happens. And while I'm inclined to believe that Him put the Vortex there years ago, I wonder if Him is subject to time the way other beings are. The way He said, "How was I supposed to anticipate youd fall in?", just seems very suspicious, and not technically a lie since it was posed as a question, albeit implicitly rhetorical. He was actually pissed about the monster horde, which was what caused the building and asphalt around it to cave in, exposing the Vortex. So maybe the Vortex wasnt part of His plan. But it's also unclear how large the vortex was. Was it just the size of the parking garage, or was it lying beneath the entirety of Townsville, waiting to be unearthed by the Girls and/or Boys?

Regarding his anger over the monster horde rampage, we see that it's at least in part due to Brick assuming such an "uncreative" plot was His. But I think He is angry at Mrs Morbucks herself. I feel like he's one of those people like "only I can fuck with my kids and put them in serious danger, no one else". And the way he refers to Mrs Morbucks as "your rich older woman", has the disdain that a parent might have for their kid's unsavory friend. Like a sarcastic "why don't you ask your 'hip' stoner friend?" We know that Mrs Morbucks does evil in the style of subtle, back door schemes in the shadows of the world, and that Brick aspires to that kind of evil. He rejected Him and Mojo's flashy theatrics and their fixation on the PPGs, in favor of working with JS for an impressive salary. Him doesn't approve of any of that, He wanted the Boys to follow in His footsteps. So now He's like a dad scolding him saying, "this is why we don't run with scissors" except it's, "this is why we don't get involved with those secretive corporate types". But I think He might also be mad cuz He had a plan up His sleeve, and Mrs Morbucks' stunt fucked it all up. I mean He visited Brick the Day Before that whole situation, and I can't think that it was just to tease him over Blossom.

(To be continued with the actual master plan theory, now that I've presented all this extraneous evidence for there being a master plan at all)

#sbj more than human #chillin with the villains series #him #part 1 #another very long one

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ask-joeydrewstudios · 5 years

Text

Another Reality (Part 1)

(Hello, Mun! I’ve been wanting to write a fanfiction for this AU for awhile, but once I heard the blog was shutting down, I finally decided to start. As a result of my lateness, this fanfiction is not finished. I guess I’ll be sending the rest to your other blog, if you’re interested. This is literally the first time I’ve ever submitted something online, so if I did something wrong, I apologize.)

(Where do I begin? Mun, I’d just like to thank you for all the laughs and heartfelt moments this blog has provided. It was a creative, unique idea to have a “happily ever after” AU, and continues to be. I haven’t been here since the beginning; I only got into the Bendy and the Ink Machine fandom about a year ago, and found your blog a few months later. But I can say that this has been, by far, one of my most favorite blogs here on Tumblr. I love your original take on all the characters, and their unique designs. You are an amazing artist and even more amazing human being. I wish you the best of luck in all your future projects, both fandom related and not.)

(Now back to the fanfiction. I’d been entertaining the idea of the studio employees of this AU ending up in the game studio. I decided to write that, but only for Chapter 1. It gets pretty “angsty” later on, but I tried to mix in some humor as well. I’ve never written anything so dramatic before, so we’ll see how it turned out.)

((Note: This fanfiction was written rather hastily, so I’m sorry if the pacing seems too fast. The way I headcanon the AU studio is that it’s a mix of the studio before the game was remastered and the studio after it was remastered, meaning the ink machine is in a small room at the far end of the main hallway, like the original, but everything else is like the remastered version.))

Joey Drew glanced over at his dozing head animator, Henry, before quietly laying down his pencil, setting aside the papers he’d been writing on. Slowly, he pulled open his desk drawer and withdrew his book of dark magic, careful to make as little noise as possible. He had no wish for Henry to discover him in the act of practicing spells; the cartoonist, while not actively trying to prevent him from performing said rituals, did not necessarily approve of them, either.

The head of the studio adjusted his glasses as he flipped through the pages of his book. He’d been so busy lately with the cartoons, which were quickly gaining popularity, that he hadn’t had time for practicing his spells. Joey had finished most of his work for the day, and decided he was deserving of a quick break.

Henry had come in about ten minutes ago, stumbling slightly as he’d opened the door, rubbing at his eyes beneath his glasses. Joey shook his head, looking over at the young man, now fast asleep in his armchair. That boy needed to take better care of himself; he’d been working for almost two days straight on the latest cartoon, ignoring Joey’s and his wife’s protests. Henry’s work habits had improved much since he’d married Dianne, but clearly old habits die hard. Well, Joey thought, At least he finally had the common sense to go lie down.

Joey turned his attention back to his book. He had had this book for so many years now, and still he felt he hadn’t untapped all the secrets it held, hadn’t explored all the rituals it had to offer. Thumbing through it, Joey waited for something to catch his eye. He stopped when he reached the page with an intricate summoning circle sketched on it. Joey always found himself coming back to this particular passage, but had never made the time to try it out. Grinning, Joey opened one of his drawers and took out some candles, matches, and a large ink pot. He had the time now.

The text said something about it being a gateway. The book was written all in Latin, and was extremely old and had suffered some water damage, leading to many of the words having faded away. Joey could only just make out the incantation. Taking up his ink pot, Joey began to copy the circle down on the floor of his office. The ink he was using was not the regular ink found at the store. It was cursed ink, the kind used to bring Bendy, Boris, and Alice to life.

Joey deftly finished copying the diagram, years of experience guiding his hand. He was just reaching for the matches, when a shout he knew all too well reached his ears.

“JOEY!”

Sighing, Joey set down the match box and got to his feet, groaning slightly (being old was not fun). Couldn’t Sammy try to be a little more quiet? He checked to make sure Henry hadn’t woken up at the sudden outburst. Thankfully, the animator was still sound asleep. Joey quietly crossed his office and opened the door, shutting it gently behind him.

Angry shouting awoke Henry from his slumber. He recognized the shouter to be Sammy (When wasn’t it Sammy?) ranting about Bendy, and something about Susie. Henry sighed. He hoped Bendy hadn’t tried to prank Sammy again. Pranking Sammy was an exceedingly bad idea, but the prank backfiring and accidentally getting Susie was even worse. From what he was hearing, that was exactly what happened. He could hear Susie trying to calm her boyfriend, and could just detect Joey’s soft, measured voice through the noise.

Henry rolled his eyes and tried to block out the sounds. He let his eyelids droop shut, but not before something caught his eye. Peeking an eye open, Henry looked down at a summoning circle on the floor. Really, Joey? Had Joey actually been performing a ritual right under his nose? Henry sat up, reached for his glasses on Joey’s desk to get a closer look.

The circle seemed more complex than the other ritual circles Henry had seen, with various designs crisscrossing each other. Henry knew next to nothing about demonic rituals, other than what Joey had told him. Actually, now that he thought of it, he probably knew more than the average person did due to his boss.

Henry decided to let it be, and proceeded to take his glasses off and begin to snuggle back into the cushions, when he heard a whisper. Frowning, Henry replaced the glasses on his nose, staring intently at the circle. Had it just said something? Henry listened closely. There was definitely a whisper emanating from the circle. The animator got to his feet, knowing he should tell Joey. The whispers grew louder. Henry couldn’t make out what they said, but the voice sounded familiar. With a start, he realized it was his voice.

Henry stood silently for a moment, too confused and surprised to move. As he stared at the circle, the ink seemed to spread. Henry blinked a few times, rubbed his eyes. No, the ink was definitely moving. It was spreading across the circle, swirling around. A tunnel began to form, steadily elongating till Henry saw a light at the very end.

Something about this tunnel held Henry in some sort of spell, and he could not bring himself to tear his gaze away. His own whispers echoed in Henry’s ears, unintelligible but urgent. Without thinking, Henry stepped toward the dark puddle. Warning bells sounded in his head, yet he could not bring himself to heed them. He stood on the edge of the circle, gazing into the abyss. His foot rose slowly, almost of its own volition. It kicked something, sending it into the tunnel as it did so, but he didn’t care. His foot sunk into the ink, bringing the rest of him with it. Distantly, Henry heard Joey’s voice calling for him, but he didn’t turn to look.

“I’ve had it up to here with that demon brat, Joey!”

Joey glared at Sammy coldly. The head of the music department didn’t seem to know how to stop shouting. Susie was trying to hush him, bringing an ink stained finger to her ink stained lips. Bendy had set a pale of ink up above the music department, attempting to drop it on one of the musicians, most likely aiming for Sammy. From what Joey had heard, and could clearly see, that ink had instead poured on Alice’s voice actress.

“Either you teach him a lesson or I will!” Sammy glared daggers at Joey.

“What do you mean by that, Lawrence?” Joey met Sammy’s glare coolly. He admitted that Bendy could be troublesome sometimes, and deserved a good chastising, but he wasn’t about to let Sammy start threatening his son. Sammy seemed to realize his mistake, for he sputtered for a few seconds, searching for something to say.

“Sammy,” Susie intervened, her voice gentle but firm, “I think Joey understands your feelings on the matter and will see to it that Bendy is suitably reprimanded. Now, please, shut up.”

Sammy looked startled for a moment and looked down at his girlfriend, who was giving him a stern look through her stringy, ink-drenched hair. Joey sighed and nodded his thanks to her, which she returned. It was commonly known around the studio that Sammy would do anything for Susie, and that was an admirable trait. Sometimes he pushed it a little far, though.

“I’ll go talk to Bendy as soon as I, ah, take care of some business.” Joey assured, turning back to his office door, pausing before he opened it, “And Susie, you may of course go home and clean up.” Susie smiled her thanks.

Joey nodded then turned the knob and entered his office, to see an ink tunnel having formed where he’d painted the circle, and Henry right on the edge of it. Joey could only stare for a moment, before calling out to Henry, who was actually stepping into this mysterious tunnel.

“Henry!” Joey leaped for the animator, but he was already falling down the tunnel, and into the brightness at the end. Sammy and Susie both burst into the room, alarmed by Joey’s cry.

“Joey, what- Holy heck!” Sammy’s eyes landed on the tunnel, and he took a step back, “What in blazes is that?”

Joey was staring intently at the tunnel, unable to speak for a few moments. What had just happened? How could it have happened? He hadn’t even begun the ritual! Joey was suddenly aware of whispers coming from the tunnel, reverberating in his ears. He stumbled away from them, backing into Sammy and Susie.

“Joey, what’s going on?” Susie’s nervous eyes searched Joey’s face for an answer, an answer Joey didn’t have.

“I-I don’t know.” His gaze was fixated on the tunnel, “I didn’t do anything. I only painted the circle. This shouldn’t have happened! Henry…” Oh goodness, what had he done?

Joey glanced desperately around for his ritual book; it would have the answer to how to bring Henry back. It had to. When he didn’t see it, Joey was immediately filled with dread. It had to be here. He frantically searched under the armchair and by his desk, but it was nowhere to be found, which meant only one thing: it had fallen into the gateway with Henry.

After a brief moment of panic, Joey came to a decision, “I’m going after him.” He stepped toward the ink, a deep sense of calm and resolution suddenly washing over him. Henry was like a son to him, and Joey wouldn’t be exaggerating if he said he wouldn’t know what to do should anything happen to him. He was the reason Henry had fallen down this ink tunnel, and he would be the one to bring him back.

“You can’t just jump into some ink tunnel not knowing where it leads.” Susie protested, “We need a plan.”

“The plan is to go in, get Henry and the ritual book, then find a way back.”

“That doesn’t sound very well thought out.”

“There are no other options!” Susie jumped slightly at the harshness in Joey’s voice. Then, seeing the desperation in the older man’s eyes, her tone softened.

“Alright.”

“ ‘Alright?’ ” Sammy interrupted, looking at Susie in disbelief, “We’re seriously letting Joey jump into a freaking hole in the floor?”

“Do you have any better ideas?”

When Sammy remained silent, Susie turned back to Joey.

“Go.” she said, simply.

Joey nodded, prepared to jump in, before turning to his employees, “No one is to follow me, understand?” Susie nodded, and Sammy glanced between the two of them before nodding slowly. Joey turned back to the ink tunnel, and, before fear could overtake him, he jumped.

What the heck just happened?

Henry lay on his back, staring up at the ceiling of the studio. He had been falling down a tunnel of ink till he’d flown up and out of the tunnel, landing painfully on his back. Now here he lay, too stunned to do little more than blink. After a few moments, Henry remembered he had arms, and he used these arms to push himself up to a sitting position, while adjusting his glasses. Turning round, Henry saw the strange tunnel he’d just fallen through, on the floor just a foot from him. Henry had had many strange experiences in his life, but this definitely was the strangest. Even that one time Bendy had turned him into a cartoon didn’t seem so weird compared to this.

Henry got shakily to his feet, surveying his surroundings more. He was at the entrance to the studio, but Henry immediately realized it had changed. There were no sounds, no one speaking other than the whispering portal. The studio was never this quiet. There was a large amount of ink dripping from a section of the ceiling, creating a large puddle on the floorboards. That hadn’t been there this morning. What was even more peculiar was the glowing ink on the walls and floor. That definitely hadn’t been there this morning.

Henry studied this strange ink, first looking down at the large amount that seemed to have been painted across the floorboards. At the end of this long stretch of ink was written in large letters “DON’T TURN ON THE MACHINE”. Henry could only assume whoever had written this was referring to the ink machine. His eyes roved over the writing on the walls. Two sections were devoted solely to tallies. One part read “TURN BACK”, painted over a Bendy poster, and another read “I’M SORRY BUDDY”, over a Boris poster. In the room that led off from this hallway, Henry could see a large sign for Joey Drew Studios, with moving film reels behind it. Over the “Studios” part was written “NOTHING”, so that the sign seemed to read “Joey Drew nothing”. Henry couldn’t even begin to wrap his head around all he was seeing. All the writing was so ominous. Why would anyone write this in the studio? Was this even the studio he knew? Where was he?

Panic began to set in, and Henry found himself turning back to the ink tunnel; if it could send him to wherever this place was, then surely it could send him back home. As he prepared to walk back through, Henry spotted Joey’s book of dark magic lying on the ground. He remembered something had fallen into the tunnel before he did, but he hadn’t spotted it until now. Henry picked it up, and held it close to him. Suddenly this book of devilry was the most precious and comforting item in the world.

Henry took a deep breathe, about to step into the gateway, when he saw something falling through it, rising up toward him. No, not something, someone. Joey!

Joey flew threw the tunnel, arching through the air before slamming into Henry. The two men crashed to the ground, the ritual book flying from Henry’s grasp. The pain Henry felt at the collision did not override the relief and joy he felt at seeing Joey.

“Joey!” he cried, pushing his glasses back into place.

“Henry!” The older man struggled to sit up, enveloping the animator in a tight embrace the moment he did. Henry returned the hug with equal warmth, letting all of his fears melt away, even just f

or a moment, to allow himself to feel safe and comforted.

Joey pulled away from the hug first, adjusting his askew glasses, “Are you hurt?” he asked, eyeing Henry up and down.

“No. Are you?” Joey didn’t talk about it very much, but he was growing old, and falling through a tunnel and smacking into someone else before hitting the floor probably did not do his aging body any wonders.

“I’m fine.” Joey assured, attempting to stand before wincing and sinking back down, “Or at least I will be.”

Henry nodded understandingly, seating himself beside Joey. The two men sat in silence for a few seconds, allowing their nerves to settle. At last, Joey turned to Henry, his icy blue eyes wide and earnest, “I’m sorry this happened to you. I didn’t think this would - or could - happen. I should have been more careful.”

Henry smiled wanly. Joey had done a lot of what could be considered bad things in his life, such as summoning creatures from ink, but he’d never done anything with malicious intent. He always owned up to his mistakes and always tried to make amends. Sure, he was a little too careless sometimes, but it was hard for Henry to hold a grudge against the man who had given him his dream job, who was always there for him, and who he considered to be like a father to him.

“I forgive you.” Henry said, simply.

Joey searched Henry’s gaze, and, apparently concluding he’d meant what he said, smiled back.

The studio owner then eyed their surroundings, his brow furrowing, before spotting his book. He went to get up and grab it, but Henry beat him to it, and handed the book to him. Joey flipped through the pages impatiently before stopping on a page with a sketch of the ritual circle Henry had seen just minutes ago in Joey’s office.

“This’ll be our ticket home.” he said, pointing to the diagram.

“Can’t we just walk back through the tunnel?” Henry asked.

“The portal probably only works on one end, and since no one knows how to bring us back on that end, we’ll need a second ritual circle to get us back to our studio.” Henry frowned, and experimentally tried to put his hand through the tunnel they’d come through. Sure enough, some invisible barrier prevented him from doing so.

“Now all we need is ink…” Joey mused aloud. Henry knew they couldn’t just use normal ink; they needed ink directly from the ink machine. Henry glanced over at the message on the floor. “DON’T TURN ON THE MACHINE”.

“What do you make of these messages?” Henry asked, gesturing to the glowing ink surrounding them.

Joey frowned, “What messages?”

“These ones.” Henry said, gesturing again. Joey looked about them a moment before turning back to Henry, a puzzled expression on his face.

“I don’t see anything.”

Now Henry frowned, “How do you not see anything? They’re literally glowing.”

Joey continued to look confused, which irritated Henry. He didn’t like being the only one seeing the messages, seeing as how he didn’t know what that meant.

Joey’s head tilted slightly as he considered his apprentice, “What do these messages say?”

Henry explained to him all the markings he was seeing, and the older man stroked his chin thoughtfully.

“Interesting…” he murmured to himself. Henry didn’t understand why Joey found it so “interesting”, but decided not to ask; he wasn’t sure he wanted to know.

Joey seemed to remember the whispers coming from the tunnel, and he turned slowly to face them, a look of surprise on his face.

“Is that-”

“Me? Yeah, it is.”

Joey stared at Henry silently for a moment, before turning back to the portal.

“I wish I could understand what you’re saying.”

“So do I.”

Joey stared wide-eyed at the gateway for a few more seconds, before snapping back to the matter at hand.

“Well, regardless of the warning not to, we need to turn on the ink machine in order to get home.” Joey rose slowly to his feet. He rubbed at a spot on his back, and grimaced.

“That’ll smart for awhile.” he said, half to himself. Turning to Henry, Joey smiled slightly.

“Let’s go.”

Sammy could not believe what he was seeing. Many a strange thing had happened in the years since he’d begun working at the studio, but this definitely surpassed them all. Well, apart from that one time Bendy had turned him into an ink monster for a few days, but other than that, this was definitely the strangest thing that had happened.

Susie and he stood as far away from the ink tunnel as they could without leaving the room. The whispers were still audible over here, but were not nearly as… tantalizing. Something about those whispers sounded familiar, but Sammy couldn’t place why. They also seemed to have a sort of lulling effect, and Sammy and Susie had to repeatedly stop themselves from advancing toward the gateway. At last, Sammy decided to just turn his back to the tunnel; the whispers were less prominent this way.

Darn it, Joey. He cursed to himself, Why do you have to go mucking about with this stuff?

Susie noticed Sammy’s consternation, “Are you alright?” she asked.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” Susie gave him a knowing look, and Sammy crossed his arms. He would never, ever, say it, but he had come to actually like his boss, even though he could be a total idiot sometimes. And he’d always respected Henry for his work ethic and for the fact that he always minded his own business. The music director grudgingly admitted to himself that he cared for both of them, something Susie could understand without him having to put it into words.

“Hey, Mr. Drew!” Wally’s voice snapped Sammy from his thoughts, as did the janitor’s hurried footsteps, “Mr. Drew, there’s a pipe leak- sweet cheese!” Wally ran into the office and immediately backpedaled when he saw the tunnel, hugging the wall.

“Wh-What is that?” The janitor turned to Sammy and Susie, steadily inching closer to them.

“It’s a hole in the floor.” Sammy said drily, too disgruntled to explain.

Susie rolled her eyes at Sammy and explained the situation to a flabbergasted Wally, who had made his way over to them and stood close to Susie.

“Henry fell into this… tunnel, and Joey went to go rescue him.”

“… So, we’re just waitin’ now?” Wally asked, his eyes flicking from the tunnel to Susie and back again.

“Basically.”

Wally nodded slowly. Sammy sighed. As if the situation wasn’t bad enough already, now they had to deal with Wally. Could this day get any worse? Bendy rushed into the room. I’ve got to remember to stop asking that. The ink demon looked scared, and Sammy figured he was probably seeking Joey for protection, which he often did when Sammy was mad at him.

Bendy squeaked when he saw Sammy, made to leave, then paused when he noticed the music director wasn’t even looking at him. Cautiously, Bendy stepped into the room, squeaking again when he saw the portal on the floor.

“What happened?” he asked, his pie eyes wide, “Where’s Papa Drew?”

Susie smiled gently, crouching down so she was at eye level with Bendy to give him the news.

“He and Henry fell into that ink thing!” Wally cried. Susie turned to glare at him, while Bendy’s usually smiling mouth drooped into a frown.

“When are they comin’ back?” he asked. Sammy watched as Susie searched for an assuring answer, stuttering a bit. He decided to interject.

“They’ll be back soon.” Sammy looked down at the ink demon. Bendy looked up at him, no longer afraid of his wrath. Sammy had to admit he wasn’t really angry with him any more; too much had happened in the past several minutes.

“You’re welcome to wait for them with us.” Susie said.

Bendy nodded and seated himself, facing the portal. Sammy and Susie shared a glance, each silently asking the same question: What do we do if they don’t come back? Out of the corner of his eye Sammy saw Wally move, but was too absorbed in his thoughts to turn and look. If they don’t come back- No. I won’t think about that right now. Sammy found his hands moving to his pockets, reaching in for his cigarettes and lighter. Smoking usually helped calm his nerves.

Sliding out a cigarette and placing it in his mouth, Sammy flicked open the lighter, bringing it up to the end of his stick.

“Um, Wally, what are you doing?”

Bendy was looking behind Sammy and the music director turned to see Wally right on the edge of the ink tunnel. Oh, shoot! “Wally!”

The lighter fell from Sammy’s grasp, flipping closed, the cigarette falling to the floor as he dove for the janitor. Wally was descending into the ink and Sammy clutched his arm. Wally’s weight and the pull of the portal was too much, though, and Sammy was soon diving in as well. Dimly, he heard Susie shouting his name, felt her hands on his upper arm. Then they were all lost to the ink and whispers.

The deeper into the studio they went, the more uneasy Joey and Henry became. It was all too clear no one else was here, and hadn’t been for quite some time. However, two of the rooms off the main hallway had lights on, one of them being Sammy’s upstairs office. Music suddenly began to play from behind the door. Joey and Henry had shared a nervous glance before Joey had timidly said, “Hello?” No one answered, and the music soon stopped. They’d tried to open the door, but it was locked. Ink dripped in worrying amounts from various sections of the ceiling; Joey was surprised the ceiling was still holding up. If all this wasn’t eerie enough, Henry discovered more hidden messages. Over the directory was written “DEATH IN EVERY DiRECTION”. There was a message just beyond it, that Joey could see quite clearly. “DREAMS COME TRUE”. That was his slogan. Why had someone written his slogan on the wall in ink? Who had done it? Henry told him there was another secret message just above it that said “NOT ALL”. “NOT ALL DREAMS COME TRUE”. What did this mean?

Obviously this universe’s version of the studio was radically different from the one Joey had founded. But why? If there was an alternate studio, there must be an alternate version of him. Joey couldn’t imagine any version of him would let the studio fall into ruin; the success of the studio had always been his top priority. And what about these messages Henry was seeing? Perhaps, Joey mused to himself, Only Henry can see them because Henry wrote them. That would make sense, if it was written in magical ink. But then Joey found himself at the same question of “Why?”. Why would Henry write these messages? Who was he trying to warn, if the only other person who could read it was another Henry?

Joey shook his head. There were no concrete answers as of yet. He needed to focus on the mission at hand: getting home.

The way to the ink machine was different than their world. The area off the hallway leading to it was blocked off by what looked like a garage door. That’s not good, Joey thought, We’ll need to open it to access the switches for the machine. Instead of this hallway directly leading to the machine, it turned right, and there was a chart at the far end of the hallway labeled “Ink Output Schedule”. Joey saw that it had been signed “T.C.”. He could only assume that meant Thomas Connor. Did this studio have all the same employees as theirs? What had happened to them? Had they all quit?

They turned right, stepping over a large pipe that extended across the floor. And soon they beheld a large room, split into two levels, with them on the upper part. Chains extended down from the ceiling to the lower level. Here on the upper level was a lever, and some sort of power generator. To the left was a trunk and a shelf. A railing was placed on the other side of this level, probably to make sure no one fell. The ink machine was nowhere in sight.

Joey just stared in awe at his surroundings. He wasn’t sure why this whole area was necessary, or where the ink machine was, but it was fascinating seeing his studio designed differently.

Henry murmured something.

“What’s that?” Joey asked, absently.

“ ‘THERE NEVER WAS A CHOICE’.”

Joey frowned, turned to look at the younger man, “What?”

Henry pointed to the floor, “Another message.”

Joey instinctively looked down where Henry was pointing, even though he knew he wouldn’t be able to see anything. He’d have to remember all these messages, so he could come to a conclusion later as to what they meant.

Henry walked over to the railing, looked down at the room below.

“I don’t see the machine.” The young man eyed the chains and the large hole in the floor, “Maybe it’s attached to the chains.”

Joey didn’t see the reason behind the chains needing to hold the machine. He guessed it was so that it could move to the different levels of the studio, though Joey didn’t think that was necessary.

The studio owner glanced about him, “How do we get to it…?” He eyed the lever, then the power generator.

“This lift could use a few dry cells.” Henry voiced Joey’s thoughts aloud.

“There’s one over there.” Joey went and grabbed one off the shelf. Henry checked the inside of the trunk, and withdrew another. The two men carried their loads over to the power generator, sliding them in place. Joey grabbed the lever, yanking it down. Instantly, the chains began moving as they worked to bring something up.

“Let’s see what’s hiding down there…” Henry said, quietly.

Sure enough, it was the ink machine, but not the ink machine they knew. This one was designed differently, with a pipe running down it, and an altogether sleeker look. Steam issued from either side, making Joey jump slightly. He pressed himself up against the railing, trying to get a closer look. He wondered how efficiently this ink machine ran compared to the one back in their world. Was it a newer model? Joey wanted nothing more than to study this alternate machine.

“Uh, Joey?” Henry’s voice jarred Joey’s thoughts, and he backed away. Right, right, getting home is our main priority.

The two of them headed out of the room, Joey casting glances back over his shoulder.

When they arrived back at the main hallway, Joey saw the roll up door that had closed off the area with the switches had been opened up, and the door to the breakroom had opened as well. But how? There was no one else here. At least, no one they’d seen. I’m beginning to think this place is haunted. And as the thought crossed Joey’s mind, he realized this notion wasn’t entirely not plausible.

“Come on.” he said, motioning to Henry. It wouldn’t do to dwell on things that could not be explained, as of yet. Henry glanced at Joey, before following him into the new hallway.

This section of the studio was just like their world’s studio, except for the occasional hole in the wall. Henry was glad to see not everything was changed, but it was eerie at the same time. How could two studios, so similar, be so different?

They turned right, past the desk and chair nobody ever used, towards the old break room, which was where one of the switches was and where Joey performed the ritual to curse the ink. Henry stared at the far wall, reading yet another secret message. “DON’T BE SCARED”, it read. Don’t be scared of what?

A plank of wood fell from the ceiling and clattered to the ground. It wasn’t so much the the fall itself but rather the resounding noise the plank made as it hit the floor that caused Henry to wince. Joey looked surprised, but other than that made no reaction. Henry looked back up at the writing on the wall. It was as if whoever had written it had known the wood would fall. Add that to the list of strange things that had been happening.

Henry reported the message to Joey, who paused, before nodding, telling him to keep him posted. Hopefully Joey will be able to make better sense of these messages than I can.

They reached the intersection, and Henry turned right, heading for the break room, but something caught his eye in the room to the left. He turned to look just as Joey gasped, a small cry escaping him. Henry looked into the other room and saw Boris - dead - strapped to a raised table, his rib cage splayed open with a wrench jammed between them and his eyes crossed out.

Henry could only stand there, staring at the corpse. Horror filled him, overtaking his mind. He couldn’t breathe, he couldn’t think. Boris was dead. Boris was dead.

The two men stood frozen for a few moments, until Joey stumbled forward, inexplicably drawn to the dead wolf. Henry wanted to do something, to pull him away, but his limbs refused to move. Joey approached Boris, staring up at the body. His legs could no longer carry him, and he sunk to the floor, kneeling before the corpse, his ritual book falling from his grasp. A horrible noise escaped him, and Henry realized it was a sob, a terrible, heart-wrenching sob. And suddenly Henry could move again, and he was running to and kneeling beside his boss. A golden message shone on the floor, but Henry couldn’t care less what it said.

Henry’s arms wrapped around Joey, offering what little comfort they could. Joey didn’t seem to notice, his watering blue eyes trained on Boris. Henry squeezed his eyes shut, trying to hold back his own tears; one of them needed to stay strong.

The two men remained in silence for what seemed an eternity, before Joey spoke, his voice low, “Who… would do this?”

Henry didn’t have an answer, and he didn’t trust his voice to speak without shaking.

Joey had finally wrenched his gaze away from Boris and was staring down at his hands, “How could I let this happen?”

Henry took a deep breath before speaking, “It’s not our Boris.”

“But he’s still Boris. There’s a Joey in this world, and he let this happen. He…” Joey’s voice broke as he covered his face with his hands.

Biting his lower lip, Henry gently withdrew his arms from around Joey, shifting himself so that he was partially facing the older man.

“Joey,” he said, softly. Joey didn’t look up. Henry breathed in slowly, calming himself before he continued, his voice stronger, “Joey, this isn’t your fault. Whoever did this, whichever Joey let this happen, is not you.” Joey continued to sob quietly into his hands.

Henry realized that no amount of comforting words would make this moment any better. Joey had just seen the disemboweled corpse of his son. Yes, this Boris wasn’t their Boris, from their world, but it was still Boris. It didn’t matter whose fault it was. Boris was still dead. His son was dead.

Scooching back beside Joey, Henry wrapped his arms about him again, and this time Joey leaned into him, giving himself to his anguish. Henry held him tighter, letting his own tears fall.

And so the two men remained, whispers echoing about them, the Boris corpse oblivious to the tears being shed for it.

Susie fought to keep herself from shivering. She was still drenched from the ink Bendy had poured on her, and the chill of this… other studio combined with the wetness set her teeth chattering. Sammy noticed this, and wrapped an arm about her, not caring that he was getting ink on his own clothes. Susie smiled at her boyfriend gratefully.

The three of them (her, Sammy, and Wally) gazed about this strange new studio. Neither Joey nor Henry were in sight; Susie hoped they were alright.

Sammy was glaring viciously at Wally, “Well, Franks, I hope you’re happy. We’re trapped in some alternate studio, with no way of getting back, and it’s all thanks to you.”

“Hey!” Wally cried indignantly, “It’s not my fault! I didn’t know the tunnel was gonna start whisperin’ at me. You guys shoulda warned me!”

“Let’s not argue.” Susie said, already sick of their bickering, “We need to find Joey and Henry.”

Sammy cast one last glare at Wally, before turning to Susie, sighing, “Let’s go, then.”

The trio had tumbled out of the portal a mere minute ago, with Wally landing first, flat on his face, Sammy landing on top of the janitor, and Susie forming the apex of their strange little tower. It had taken them some moments to regain their bearings and to disentangle themselves from each other, but they’d been quite surprised by their surroundings once they had. Now they advanced through the silent hallway leading toward the ink machine, becoming more wary with each step.

“Joey?” Susie called softly, her voice seemingly too nervous to speak louder, “Henry?”

Sammy paused when they reached his office, opening the door. It wasn’t much different from his office back in their world, with a desk taking up most of the space, a radio, and a shelf, except this shelf contained bacon soup. Nobody at their studio enjoyed bacon soup except for Bendy and Henry. How old is this stuff? Susie withdrew a can from the shelf, checked the expiration date, her eyes widening when she saw the soup had expired almost three decades ago. How long has it been since anyone worked here?

“ ‘He will set us free’?” Susie turned to see Sammy reading off a paper on his desk, brow furrowed. The music director turned to look at his girlfriend, “Did I write that?”

Susie didn’t have an answer for him. Since there was another studio, it was conceivable that there could be other versions of themselves. For some reason, the thought made the voice actress uneasy; she wasn’t sure she could handle meeting another version of herself. This studio was already so different from theirs; wouldn’t its employees be different, too?

Gently, Susie laced her arm through Sammy’s, led him out of the small space. Wally surveyed the room more closely once they’d stepped out, his eyes alighting on the small radio on the desk. Before either Susie or Sammy could protest, Wally had turned the dial. Music blared from the radio, making them all jump. Cursing, Sammy shoved past Wally and shut it off.

“Can’t you ever use your brain, Franks?” Sammy scowled at the janitor.

“I wanted to see if it still worked.” Wally said defensively, “I didn’t think it would be so loud…”

Sammy gestured to the radio, “The volume is turned all the way up, if you hadn’t noticed.”

“Oh.” Wally looked sheepish, “Well, maybe Joey or Henry heard it.”

Or something else did. Susie shook her head, trying to ignore the fanciful notion.

The three continued to progress down the hallway, noticing the ink machine wasn’t directly at the end as it was in their studio. They were just nearing the break room when soft footsteps could be heard in the section opposite it. The three of them halted, and Susie licked her dry lips, tasting ink, before calling timidly, “Joey?”

“Susie?” Henry’s low voice made Susie sigh in relief, and she walked forward just as Henry turned the corner, Joey right behind him. Susie’s smile faltered as they neared, seeing their faces. Henry’s eyes were red rimmed, his mouth set in a tight line, as if he was trying to hold himself back from crying. Joey clearly had been crying, and his puffy, red eyes proved that. His breathing was shaky, and as he came up to meet her, Susie could see tears still sliding down his cheeks.

“Are you alright?” she asked of them immediately. Neither of them could meet her gaze.

“We’re fine.” Henry looked up at Sammy and Wally, before turning to Susie, “Why are you here?”

“We fell in by accident.” Susie explained.

“She means Wally dragged us here.” Sammy added, earning a harsh glare from Susie.

Wally crossed his arms, “I didn’t ask you to try and save me.” The voice actress tried to communicate to the two of them with her eyes that now was a very bad time to argue. Sammy caught her look, and seemed to finally notice that Joey and Henry were upset. He frowned, nudging Wally slightly before he could continue the squabble. The janitor looked confused at Sammy’s sudden silence, before he too saw the reason behind it.

Henry sighed, rubbed at his eyes beneath his glasses, “Well, we need the ink machine to get home. We were just about to start the ritual when we heard the radio turn on.”

The animator made to turn back the way he’d come, but stopped to glance at Joey. The older man hadn’t said a word, had barely even looked at them. He seemed lost in his own world, which wasn’t unusual for him. But the utterly morose look on his face wasn’t like Joey at all. He looked like he was within moments of an emotional break down.

“Joey,” Henry’s voice grew quiet as he addressed his mentor, “do you want to wait a bit?”

Joey turned to his apprentice, before drawing a long, quivering breath, “No. I want to go home.” Henry nodded, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder before walking off in the direction of the ritual room. Susie shared a confused and concerned glance with Sammy and Wally. What could Joey and Henry have seen to affect them in this manner? Susie had a sinking feeling she was about to find out.

(That’s it for now! I hope you all enjoyed this. It might be a bit too depressing for the end of the blog, but oh well. I never was good at writing fluff. Farewell, Mun! I’ll be seeing you on your art blog.)

(( Oh wow, I think this is the longest one submission i’ve ever gotten xD I like how you write the characters, you’ve got their personalities down pretty well, and even though a few people have done the ‘AU characters end up in the canon universe’ idea the whole ‘people reacting to the dead boris’ thing never gets easier to read :^) it hurts every time. if you continue to write this please feel free to @ my art blog, i’d love to see more! thanks for the fic!! <3))

#batim #bendy and the ink machine #bendy the demon #joey drew #henry batim #sammy lawrence #susie campbell #wally franks #submission #fanfic #angst #anonymous #anon

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docholligay · 5 years

Text

Revue Starlight

Hello! Here is a very very long post about my impressions of Revue Starlight Thus far. Please note I have only seen to episode 8 and please don’t spoil me! We are finishing the show tonight, February 20th, at 7 pm Mountain time. THis entire thing has been sponsored by @moonlight1130 and @sailorsunspot, so please thank them if you’re enjoying or have enjoyed!

They are also sponsoring a full day of questions/prompts/etc about Revue Starlight next week!

Please know also that you can hit me up to analyze the things you love! I have liveblogs on my Patreon, but I also do one off things, like watch a movie and write a post about it, or do anime streams like this one. Contact me for commission prices and information!

I have seen plenty of anime cross my dash over the years,and most times they aren’t something I’ll take to, even if I give an episode or two a try. It is, by and large, not a format for me,especially Magical Girl Shows, which, stripped of the nostalgia and history Sailor Moon has for me, don’t tend to work for me by way of their conventions.

If I hadn’t been sponsored to watch Revue Starlight, I probably never would have seen it, and this would have been a shame. Because every so often, an anime can be something I really enjoy.

I think the best part about it is, it’s enjoyable before it ever gets into the twist. Long before. I enjoyed my first chunk of watching episodes 1-4 without having the slightest clue that I should even be looking for any sort of twist, though the exchange student thing really should have tipped me off more than it did--even I can forget the most common anime conventions. But I don’t think knowing about the twist,or that there’s something else going on, is necessary to enjoy what the anime is up front.

I found it delightfully written, with an understand of what young teenagers are like that far surpasses any anime i can remember watching. It’s the first anime in memory where I’m not thinking “anime ages are so fake” the whole time. They essentially act like fifteen year olds, with not much more drama or more war-weary knowledge than any other fifteen year old I know. I also intensely appreciate the show’s commitment to not showing panty shots, and while that sounds like a joke, it is not. There are moments they literally forget about gravity to avoid it, and I genuinely appreciate the lack of fanservice so much.

And the costumes! I love the girls’ outfits for the duels, the dramatic cape and the Utena-like construction of having to knock the cape off instead of stabbing someone. The henshin is really fun to watch, and I like how there’s so much emphasis on the construction of the costume itself, not only because it helps avoid too much naked young girl screen time, but also because I think it ties back into what I THINK is one of the underlying themes of the show (More general themes I see below)

The songs are fantastic even just to listen to, and seem to make way more sense than the Utena ones. I could be talked into go back over the songs after I’ve finished the show and doing some real analysis of them, but I think they’d be enjoyable even without.

The girls themselves I think are largely well-written and individual, with a personality of all types of people who need a character to love and hate. And it’s FLATASS WILD. I think one of the best ways it keeps you watching is the way that it has this ridiculous premise with the goddamn giraffe, and to a point you’re watching out of out extreme curiousity. By the time you’re like “This is just weird, I guess.” the personalities of the characters have sucked you in, and it holds you until you hit episode 7 and the twist.

But WHAT a twist. You’d think I’d be more or less used to “It was time bullshit the whole time” as I have watched an anime, but apparently I did not learn my lesson, because I was totally shocked. Completely taken by surprise in episode 7, had no idea that I should be looking for it or even thinking about it. AND WHAT A CHARACTER TO DO IT WITH, and I think it speaks to the writing of the show that I didn’t roll my eyes and go “Oh, the nice character turned out to be the villain” because I think the show doesn’t try to work in absolutes. One thing I like about it is a feel very free to like or dislike any of the characters. I DID (and do) like Nana, I thought she was a precious bean to be cherished, but I think part of the reason I could indulge in that is she wasn’t written as innocent and woobie and shy like a lot of times those characters are--she was fucking around with scripts and roles, and while she was very kind none of it was obsequious or pathetic. ALSO I don’t feel they really consider her a villain (I don’t,) but a girl who got caught up in the idea of things never getting better than they are now. Two of her friends left school because they couldn’t take the heat. She didn’t want that again, and what better way than to keep everyone safe, under glass?

I know I’m really caught up in Utena shit right now, and so I’m sure that’s why my mind is leaning this way, but it really echoes that to me, the idea of not going forward but being trapped in cycle after cycle. That she’s stagnant, refusing to grow or change. What would happen to Nana if she never broke it? The giraffe brought Hikari forward, I think to some extent, because he was fucking bored with the same “show” over and over again. But I love it, I love that she keeps winning because no one really wants it bad enough. No one wants to be a star as badly as Nana wants things to never change, and I think that there’s something so beautifully human in that, to cling to an enjoyable moment we had and keep trying to recreate it. But it’s never enough, it’s never really recreated, it’s just a hollow shell of its own self.

It’s really interesting to me that we harp so much on the idea of Hikari and Karen, and the show they saw together when they were children, and how this is all of Karen and Hikari’s motivations, when I feel like we’re being warned against the same thing with Nana. That to tie your life to a single moment is a mistake. It might just be me taking the story in a way that maybe the writers didn’t intend, or maybe it’s Not That Deep and I’m just trying to make it that deep.

WHILE WE’RE ON THE SUBJECT, The play within the show, Starlight, I assume is sort of about the girls themselves, being that I only know it as a story about eight women (Now nine, since Hikari fucked up the numbers) and I assume if and when we discover anything about the play itself, that plot points are going to be revealed, or plot points we haven’t even seen will be shown. THey keep coming back to it in the same way that we kept coming back to Utena’s story about the prince, so either the play has relevance beyond ‘the play they are currently doing’ or I’m going to beat the writers over the head with Chekov’s Gun. I also assume that Hikari and Karen are going to be our leads for it, in whatever way we end up reaching it--I have, in fact, seen an anime, and I do know how endings tend to go in them.

MY THEORY ON THE SHOW IS THAT IT IS ABOUT THEATER AND CELEBRITY.

So what I was talking about earlier regarding the transformation and how I love that it focuses so much on the costume. Part of what I think the show is trying to talk about is this idea that when we are on stage, we are someone different entirely. Who “we” are ceases to matter when we put on the costume, when we step onto the stage. And so it makes sense that more attention would be paid to the role Karen and the other girls are taking on when they steps into the Revues, than we would to Karen herself.

I’ve thought a lot about this show as I’ve been watching it, even though I didn’t have a chance to rewatch it before tonight’s conclusion (I will rewatch the whole series before next week’s Revue Starday) And the giraffe is such a weird thing, but it’s a weird thing among weird things. So I thought about it for awhile, especially after Episode 7, where the giraffe tells her he does this because he loves the spectacle, because he loves the shine of stage girls.

The giraffe is the audience. When we watch all of this with great interest, when we cheer and we boo, we are enjoying the stage that has been set for us just as much as the giraffe. It is the audience who set stage girls against each other and only allows for one top star. What got me thinking about this and on these lines, is the way that the giraffe always looks directly at us, and tells us “I understand.” I’ve thought a lot about that, and I think what that’s meant to say is that the giraffe knows what we want as an audience and is giving it to us. The audience wanted Karen to win in the beginning, and we were given it. The audience didn’t want Kaoruku to leave, so she didn’t. The audience cheered for Nana, and the giraffe said, “Oh yes, we do love her, don’t we?” ANd THAT is why I think we will get a happy asspull of an ending, and I think I MIGHT be okay with that in the context of this understanding that the giraffe is meant to stand for the audience. (Obviously not all audiences want the same things I never asked for some of this, BUT A GENERAL AUDIENCE)

Which is, like I said above, why the giraffe tries to find a way to change up the Revues. No matter how dazzling and sparkling Nana’s revue is, and it is, I laughed my ass off about the goddamn Nana fight, after awhile an audience gets bored. The audience wants something new. You can watch a spectacle 87 times and then want literally anything else, even if its just as amazing as before, it will no longer catch your heart in that exact same way.

My endgame theory is that they will find some end-around way to make it so Hikari and Karen can stand on the stage together, and I would GUESS that Karen is going to wish for the stage of life or something, so they can escape from the loop they’re in. Because remember, we want a happy ending.

A RANKING OF THE GIRLS, FROM LEAST FAVORITE TO FAVORITE (YOur mileage may vary, offer void where prohibited)

Kaoroku: I REALLY do not like her. She’s all of Usagi’s selfish baby nonsense with none of the genuine kindness. She treats Futaba horrifically, and I think this is part of the reason I buck up against her so hard, is that I HAVE KNOWN THESE GIRLS. I have seen little butch girls like Futaba being treated so badly by their significant other, and it’s so hard to try and be like, “You know she’s not allowed to treat you that way, right?” And there’s a lot of stuff that goes into that which can be another conversation for another time. So there’s extra-universe stuff that makes it really hard for me to tolerate her. Can’t do it. Would say she’s the only one of the girls I actively do not like.

These next three could leapfrog each other pretty consistently:

Karen: I like Karen plenty, but it’s a tight race between the girls and I’d say Karen is a little “anime protag” for my own personal tastes, so she gets quite a bit lower on the list. I do really like how she’s written as a classic anime protagonist in a much more real and relatable way though, and I think this is why I actually quite like her, even when she’s being an idiot.

Hikari: I actually didn’t realize how difficult this ranking thing was going to be until I’m sitting here staring at the faces of all the girls, who all have different things going on. Hikari hasn’t quite connected with me, I think between her “distant studied duelist” thing and the fact that everything centers around her and Karen I haven’t gotten to find an appreciation for her beyond broad strokes. EXCEPT THAT SMILING BEAR WITH KNIFE IS THE ONLY EMOJI WE NEED. I never love the main characters, it’s fine ahaha.

Mahiru: I would have put her lower in the first four episode chunk I watched. I have a quite good memory for names and could only really call her “friend-chan” after the first bit. Her main purpose seemed to be getting trampled by Karen when Hikari showed up. But she’s a farm girl! And she’s precious! And she shares her potat! So she’s bumped up for me in the last watching.

The next three are ALSO in a hot heat with each other:

Junna: I really, really love Junna’s whole thing, THe idea that she works her ass off, so very hard, but she doesn’t have the natural talent to carry it, and she knows that, and it kills her. But it doesn’t stop her from trying, not with everything she has inside of her, and I think that’s really lovely and I want the best for her.

Nana: I actually would have ranked her lower before the big reveal, but now she has such an interesting tragedy that I find her fucking fascinating. She’s the reason that all of these girls have to keep fighting each other, in this way, she is trying to save her friends by setting them up for combat over and over again. The idea of her having to live with that and her struggle to carry on when she’s forced to move forward make her so much more interesting than I was assuming.

Maya: One half of the femme betta fish, and the one that plays slightly less to my personal loves, but I do love her snobbiness, her complete fucking assurance that she is better than anyone in the room, and the body language to carry it off. She’s great.

MY TOP TWO GIRLS:

Futaba: I want to gently hold Futaba to my chest like a resisting cat and find her a nice girlfriend who treats her with respect. Like yes honey, protect and serve is the butch motto, but the femme motto should also be protect and cherish. She’s such a cute and kind little thing, my heart melted when she gave Claudine all the snacks for helping her out, I love her.

Claudine: Claudine was written for me. High femme, half-French, talented and snobby, annoyed when she is not the princess of all things, it’s all my favorite fucking anime girl tropes packaged into one. I love every moment that she is on screen, I think she is brilliant perfection. I am not super given to shipping in this show but if I were, it would be Claudine and Futaba.

Rin: This is cheating because I basically came up with Rin but lbr she’s great.

PLease join me tonight for the finale! Also, my ko-fi and my Patreon are what allow me to keep doing this! I judge a lot of what people are interested in by those two metrics. (COming up on Patreon: Jillybug’s corner, a non-fiction piece, and fresh recipes)

#Doc watches Revue Starlight

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fyeahebr · 5 years

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Emily Bett Rickards on the LGBTQ Dramedy ‘Funny Story’ and If She’d Return to ‘Arrow’ for Collider From Michael Gallagher, the LGBTQ dramedy Funny Story follows what happens when Walter Campbell (Matthew Glave), an aging heartthrob trying to reconnect with his estranged adult daughter Nic (Jana Winternitz), gives her friend Kim (Emily Bett Rickards) a ride to their vacation in Big Sur that he decides to crash. While these two complicated individuals bond in unexpected ways, Walter’s own narcissism and need for forgiveness threatens to ruin what’s intended to be a beautiful trip. During this 1-on-1 phone interview with Collider, actress Emily Bett Rickards talked about why this script appealed to her, what drew her to the character, always searching to discover more about who Kim was, the very quick shoot, and her favorite scene to shoot. She also talked about whether she’d want to return for the last season of The CW series Arrow, where she played Felicity Smoak for seven seasons, if she’d continue returning to TV, her desire to do more theater, and which TV series she’d like to do a guest spot on. You were so great in this, and this is such an interesting and fun character. Was that the appeal, when you read this script? Oh, yeah. The script was close to 100% of what we see on screen, just brought to life. That is what attracted to me this movie. It was so honestly written and so raw, that it was just a no-brainer. These are all characters who clearly are flawed and they make mistakes, so it would be easy to find yourself judging any of them. When you first read this, what was your initial impression of the character? Did she feel like someone that you could identify with, or did you find yourself judging her behavior? Fortunately, I was already identifying with her, due to just reading the script. What I think most people take away from watching this is that the characters are so easily relatable because of their imperfections, not because of pristine qualities. I think that Kim is someone who’s trying to be better, but can’t seem to figure that out now. I think that we see that in Walter, as well. We see what kind of destruction it can cause when you can’t accept the reflection in the mirror. Were you involved, at all, with the development of the character prior to shooting? Were there things that you wanted to add or suggest with her? We just continually talked about the character, all the time, just trying to understand who she was and how we could bring her to life. But Kim was quite well-rounded on the page, which is just so rare to find. What (writer/director) Michael [Gallagher] had done with Kim, before the words were even lifted off the page, was honest and incredible, and he took the time to collaborate and talk to me about her, sort of limitlessly. We would just talk about her, all the time, because she was so interesting. She is that person who hasn’t been able to understand herself, so we just tried to understand her. Because she is so obviously such a different character from Felicity Smoak on Arrow, how did you find the experience of actually getting on set and playing as somebody like Kim, especially when you were juggling it with playing Felicity? I did this between Seasons 4 and 5, and playing Felicity was continually going at such a rapid pace. It was just different type of vibration. This character is just a completely different person. Kim and Felicity are so different. I think that it’d be really interesting if they met, but I don’t feel like their worlds would collide. I’m not sure I found it difficult. I think I just found Kim so different. I haven’t thought about that, interestingly enough. My brain, when I was playing Felicity, we would get to the end of 23 episodes, and there was time apart from her, but I’d always get to see her again. I think now it’ll be different because I won’t get to play Felicity again. It might be a little different, and that will be a question, down the road, where the answer will surprise me. It seems like, if you hadn’t been playing Felicity and needed to keep looking like her, at the time that you did this movie, that this is the kind of character where you could have really played with your look. Had you ever thought about doing anything more than the nose piercing, like doing something crazy with your hair, if you could have? We had died my hair this gray-purple color and it didn’t stick, and that was the only thing we tried to do with Kim. I do think that Kim knows who she is. Now, it’s a little bit harder because I do feel like she is who she is and that’s what she looks like. She wants to fly under the radar, regardless. I wonder if she would have changed a lot more. I don’t know. She would never have been blonde. It’s so funny, I can’t picture her different now. There are so many moments in this that seem like they would be fun to shoot, like the big group scenes. Did you have a favorite scene to shoot? The dinner scene was lots of fun. It was nighttime and we were at this beautiful place. It was lit impeccably, and our whole small, intimate film crew was incredibly talented. Everybody had grown to know each other by then, too, which was really cool. It was just very fun. We sat down for dinner, and it was like we were really sitting down for dinner. There are definitely some emotionally intense moments in the film, too. Did you have a most difficult scene or day, during the shoot? No, not really. There wasn’t a most difficult, other than probably the end scene where we exposed all of Kim’s emotions. Because we had been talking it, it wasn’t actually the most difficult. We just wanted it to feel fluid. I feel like we didn’t have much time left. I would wait outside in the tiny little hallway. That house was artistically stunning, in its kitschy-ness, and I remember just running in and wanting to create this moment, and you feel that. I felt wonderment afterwards, about Kim and where she was going after that. That’s the emotion I had around it. I was like, where does Kim go from here? That was something that surprised me. When you played Kim, were there things that you grew to appreciate about her, by the end of shooting the film, that you didn’t necessarily see in her, in the beginning? Yeah. We shot the film in about 15 days, so it was so short, but at the same time, the answer is yes because I had more time with her. But if we had all had more time with these characters, we would have gotten to learn even more. Kim grew on me, as she hopefully grows on audience members through the movie. But when I had read her, for the first time, I already did feel like she’s with me now. That’s why I’m glad this film came to fruition the way it did. Even with the mistakes that she makes, Kim just feels like such a real person. She feels like somebody that anybody could know or come across. Yes, I think she is. With all of her imperfections and all of the walls that she has built up, we have lens inside of who she actually is. Even with all of these walls that she’s promoting to all of these other characters and who’s presenting herself to be, we get to see the truth. We actually get to see what Kim is facing, through the whole movie, because we know all of her secrets. Besides Kim, we’re the only people that know all of her secrets. Now that we know that the next season of Arrow is the last season, even though it feels like Felicity’s story came to a satisfying conclusion, would you like to return, in some capacity, with it being the last season of the show? I feel like Felicity has done her time. I don’t know if anybody is going to like what I’m saying, but I feel like Felicity has done her time. We knew this was coming for awhile – for over a year – so the whole thing is exactly what we wanted to happen. I trust the writers, and that’s in their hands. When you have a goodbye like Felicity had, at the end of the season, you also don’t want to mess that up by coming back and taking away from that. Yes, exactly. Would you consider going back to TV and signing on for another potentially long-running series, or is that something that you think you’ll take a break from for awhile? I think I’m going to take a break for awhile, and do a little bit of theater, coming up in New York (Reborning at the SoHo Playhouse from July 5th through August 3rd). And then, after that, I’m hoping to continue doing theater for a little bit longer. My friends are a bunch of creative geniuses, so no matter what, that’s the way I’m going right now. I’ll never say no to doing TV again. For now, life has changed dramatically, already. What do you enjoy about theater, that is different from film and TV? I feel like my experience with TV and my experience with indie film, is that it’s not until you walk away that you’re like, “Oh, that’s what that was about.” And I feel like with theater, the discovery is never-ending. There’s time for rehearsal and I feel like there’s a deeper exploration of what the characters are. I’m really looking forward to doing theater again. It just comes down to rehearsal time. If you’re gonna offer me rehearsal time, in other mediums, I feel like maybe I would grow from that, as well. My experience with that is just a little bit more limited. What was it about this particular character that made you want to play her on stage? She’s dark, she’s fast, she’s witty, she’s incredibly smart, and she’s also incredibly damaged. She’s someone who is a full person. I don’t think many people have the lifestyle that she has. Coming up, I hope I can discover more about why she’s in it and what’s she doing, and get deeper into her brain, for lack of a better word. Is there a current TV show that you’d love to do a fun guest spot or guest arc on? Oh, yeah. I’m a fan of Schitt’s Creek, since Season 1. There’s a lot of comedy content on TV. I dive into comedy more naturally than I dive into other things, and that’s just because I’d like to learn more, professionally.

#emily bett rickards #interview #funny story #arrow #felicity smoak

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thisislakewoodnews · 5 years

Photo

One evening, over at Raphael Stone’s home.

Characters: @raphael-stone, @mavstone, @naomixstone, @hckerstvne.

Below the cut is plot information to be led prior to the upcoming event.

Raphael Stone: Raphael had been sitting in the kitchen, laptop open and USB turning over and over between his index finger and thumb. “To get it to work, you put it in the computer.” Was the snark from his sister in the corner of the Kitchen, as he rolled his eyes. “Not yet, Noami.” She knew—she knew his intention, knew where his mind was at. Perhaps they’d always understood one another, Raphael and Naomi. As the sudden sound of the front door opening, the chime of the alarm, he stood up straight, eyes locking with his brother. “We’re just waitin’ on Lil to get her ass over here.” He commented.

Maverick Stone: There's a moment of hesitancy as Maverick stands on the other side of the door, contemplating his fate and future. Stepping through the threshold would change everything and he knew once he left, it wouldn't be the same ever again. With a breath, his hand went to door knob and the alarm announces his entrance before he can. His older brother is given a simple nod, the years of resentment seeming to vanish because there were more important matters to attend to. Naomi, on the other hand is greeted more warmly before Mav takes a seat. "How much time we got? This could take awhile." He teasingly responded.

Lily Stone: She was ready. She was ready to learn what was on the USB that almost costed Lily her life. The urge to sneak into Raphael's office and take it is finally going away as she began to feel anxious. Popping a pain killer into her mouth Lily powered through the pain she felt and made her way down the stairs. Arriving into the kitchen to see all three of her siblings is when the youngest Stone realized this is the first time they've all been together since Colleen Stone's funeral. "Sorry I'm late," she clears her throat. "I uh had to take my medicine." The hacker knew if she didn't a certain Doctor would be on her ass abut it. Ignoring the presence of Maverick for Lily was still furious at him, she takes a seat beside Raphael. Her eyes glued to the USB in her President's hand.

Raphael Stone: Did he just come right out and say it? His siblings in the room, as he drummed up a small smile—rare in its form for his brother through all their previous tension—and to Lily, who now sat at his side. “We’re looking at this—“ He murmured, holding up the USB. “It’s got incriminating footage, so we assume,” He gestured to Naomi behind him, as she drank his liquor cabinet dry. “But—It’s uh…” Raphael shrugged his shoulders. “Seran’s dead. Body found—I confirmed it was him a few hours ago.” Was there a time to mourn, yes. Completely. But not now. “I—we’re out a Vice President, and we cannot be.” He’d been looking around the room to his siblings, as hues settled on his brother. “We need a Vice President, Maverick.” Was Raphael making his point clear?

Maverick Stone: Blue eyes shifted to the USB that would be the answer to all their questions and the source of all their problems. Such a small subject possessed enough power to bring all four Stone siblings together for the first time in years, excluding their mother's death. It was enough to make Maverick less of a pessimistic shit. His eyes moved from the drive to Raphael as he began to speak, explaining the entire situation that led to this moment. Seran was a huge loss but, with everything as they are now, the family wasn't in a position to look vulnerable. "And I accepted." He added to Raphael's point, eyes gauging his sister's expression to gauge their reactions...because he knows there will be one. "It was time. There's too much shit going on and we can't afford to look weak and divided."

Lily Stone: Hearing the death of Seran was no loss to Lily personally, not really, but to the cartel? Big loss. Before Lily could tell Raphael she is sorry for the loss of his vice president and to ask how he met his demise she found herself biting her bottom lip. How eager Lily felt to see what was on the USB quickly became replaced with one emotion; rage. No longer able to keep her mouth shut, the youngest Stone looks to her President. "You want him as your Vice President?" Lily felt as if she should've seen it coming, but she didn't. Without realizing it Lily stood up out of her chair to tower him. "He fucking left Lakewood and the cartel all behind because he got his feelings hurt by that bakery princess." Oh there was so much more Lily wanted to say about all of this. "Give it to Lucien or--" the young Stone found herself choking on her words. "--or someone else who didn't abandon us or the cartel!" That is when she finally looked to Maverick with a burning rage in her eyes. "When I left, I left to gather Intel--not be a glutton for punishment in Vegas like you did." If anyone where to ask Lily, she saw it as if she should get the promotion not Maverick. Did she want to be the VP? Hell no. She wanted to be what she always wanted; a soldier and work her way up to Lieutenant and Bodyguard.

Raphael Stone: Didn’t he expect just that? Someone would have something to say, as he raised a hand, sunken silence. Lily was laying it on—Naomi’s personal opinion would come, but now wasn’t the time. “Get over it—“ Raphael snapped, looking at his little sister. “You’re not the only one he left. He left me. Mom, dad, Naomi—“ He spoke, gesturing to his other sister. “Maverick fucked up—and I know where he’s coming from. If it had been me…” Silence fell for a moment, as he sighed. “I would’ve done the same thing. It was suffocating. I stayed, but I didn’t like it any less. I knew what was being held over my head. He had more freedom.” Raphael stood, USB still gripped tight. “But the only way we’re all looking at this, is if we all agree to accept what I’m saying—“ A lull. “Or don’t, I don’t care. I’m the President of this Cartel, I’m making him the Vice President.” Maverick was right. It was time. “We’re family.” He looked to Lily. “That understood?”

Maverick Stone: Maverick saw that reaction coming from a million miles away. Lily wasn't exactly known for being subtle or for her lack of dramatics. His eye simply arched at the younger Stone as she climbed onto the chair, throwing a fit -- which, in a way, was warranted. Attention shifting from Lily to Raphael, the tone in his older brother's voice said it all. It wasn't really a question, despite him giving the siblings an option, it was a command. "I already apologized for what I did." Maverick stated, even though he'd do it all again in a heartbeat. "That was then and this now. You wanted me here, Lil, I'm fucking here and stepping up to the plate." Better late than never, he figured. "If Raphael and I can put our shit to the side to make this work, then so can you." He noted. "It's time to let it go. That was the past and there's a lot more important shit happening right now that we need to focus on."

Lily Stone: When Raphael stood and towered over Lily she stood her ground against him. She never has been one to back down so easily, so why start now? Lily knew they were right and found it difficult in herself to put this bullshit aside. "Fine. I'll play along with him being the Vice President." then something came to her mind. "Since you are clearly giving out promotions--then promote me to being a soldier." The youngest Stone knew she shouldn't even have to say why. Taking a deep breath she looks back over to Maverick with anger still residing in her eyes. Though she lost her breath when she felt a sudden sharp pain in her abdomen; the stab wound. Acting as if she weren't in pain Lily held her gaze on Maverick. "I'll be a good little warrior and keep my mouth shut for now on about you becoming VP, but for what you did to me as my brother? You got a long way to fucking go for that." She declares. With that Lily sits down and crosses her arms over her chest before looking to Raphael. "Now can we see what is on that damn USB? I about died from being gutted over that fucking thing."

Raphael Stone: Raphael didn’t even hesitate to her quip. “No.” His voice was sound and strong. Don’t question him, don’t barter him. This wasn’t some clubhouse, no form of government or diplomacy. It was a god damn crime to do as they did—what he says, goes. “You’ll stay where you are, Naomi is staying where she is, I’m bringing someone in, not shifting the fucking pyramid.” Didn’t he expect an argument from Lily? Sure. But he wasn’t about to lift her up to justify some vendetta she was hanging over Maverick’s head. “Lily, I swear to fucking god, pull your foot out of your mouth and listen to me,” Raphael rubbed his temples momentarily. “I run this show—so when you’re speaking to Maverick from here on out, you better do it with some fuckin’ respect.” There was another lull. “He’s not just your brother—he outranks you now.” Was it a silent warning to Naomi as well, should the equally vibrant-with-words have an opinion? Possibly. Maybe with her sullen silence she knew not to push Raphael. “Now,” He murmured. “We watch this once, and Maverick and I will decide what to do.” He eyed his little sister as a warning—no smart remarks. Plugging the USB in, as the CCTV footage came to light. Raphael’s mind was trying to remember the familiarity of the scene. Set outside of Tito’s, a familiar spot for the Stone family—“Oh my god,” Naomi’s long hair almost shielding the wide screen as she leaned in, even the awe striking her tone. “Look at the date—“ She pointed to the corner of the screen with a finely manicured hand. “This was the date Mom died…” Did he hone in, finally pay attention to the scene that had been—gunshots went off, silence on the film, but the bright light moved in. “Move,” Maverick murmured, as he reached for the laptop. Raphael cast a ‘keep quiet’ glare to Lily. “We can zoom in on—“ His words stopped, , as the screen was moved back, shifted for Raphael to see as clearly as they could make out on the black and grey screen: Dominic Moretti. Gun in one hand, gunning the gas of his motorcycle in the other. “Oh my god,” Naomi broke the silence first, as he felt her place a hand on his shoulders. “You know what this means, Raph…” He stayed silent for another moment. “I know,” He looked to Maverick. “The Castro cartel didn’t kill mom—the Rinaldi’s did.” [END]

#lakewood: plot drop

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