#not at all inspired by a song I've had on repeat the past two days

[sgtbradfords]

Chenford + Love Confession ❤️

Lucy pulled the blue cotton sheet higher over her chest, holding the fabric there as she sat upwards on the bed. Suddenly, she felt undoubtedly exposed.

"You're leaving."

A stillness fell over the bedroom, while her thoughts ran freely. The silence was deafening, maddening, and done nothing to help the pounding sensation that was currently happening inside her head.

She found a scoff falling past her lips, an odd mixture of shame and disbelief before she pulled her mouth closed, rolling her tongue along the inside of her cheek.

It seemed as though that was all the man, who stood at the foot of her four-poster bed needed.

Hastily he tucked the grey t-shirt that had once been on her bedroom floor, back into the waistband of his jeans. Normally Lucy would have found herself staring unabashedly, but this time, it was different.

"What else did you expect?"

Last night when he eased her back on the couch, she had drunkenly hoped that something had changed, that he had changed. Even when he had whispered, 'Nothing's changed Luce.' against the curve of her neck.

She had been an idiot for ever letting him through her front door.

Humorlessly she released a laugh, removing her hand away from her chest as the sheet pooled around her waist. She gestured animatedly in front of her, "I expected us to finally talk about it!"

His ministrations faltered, his hands pausing with his black leather belt mid loop. Not once did his stare waver from her own, giving her every bit of the non-answer she needed. They were never going to talk about it, certainly not now anyways.

Lucy turned her head towards the window, ignoring the pain that was spreading like a wildfire inside her chest. She could see that dawn was rapidly approaching outside, the early morning light casting her room in a paleness that matched the mood inside the room.

"You lost the right to show up here and fuck me when you broke up with me, Tim."

Had her stare been turned towards the man in question, she would have seen him flinch.

"That's not-"

"Then what was it?" Bitterly she laughed with the turn of her head. "What was last night? This morning? A drunken mistake? A lapse in judgement? Why did you even come here?"

Silently she pleaded for the tears that were welling in her eyes to hold off for just a minute longer.

Tim done nothing more than gape at her, his mouth wordlessly opening and closing as her words rendering him speechless, tilting his world a little further off its axis.

"Did you mean it?" Her voice was low, roughened with traces of sleep and the weight of holding back a dam of emotions from cascading over the top.

Her question brought him out of his stupor.

He tried hiding the shift of weight from one foot to the other. He tried hardening, schooling his features into one that hid his emotions. He tried containing the clenching of his jaw and the flexing of his hands.

He may have tried, but he undoubtedly failed.

"Mean what?"

"What you told me last night."

She blinked once, a rogue tear sliding down the slope of her cheek but she never made the motion to swipe it away.

The look Tim had been projecting, fell away within the blink of an eye. It was once again every bit of an answer, but she needed to hear him say it again.

"Of course I do, Lucy." His voice was as soft as the look he was giving her, soft yet firm. Almost as though he would vehemently deny ever being told otherwise. "I'll always love you."

"But?" She whispered, bringing her knees up to her chest as he moved around to what had long since been her side of the bed.

Lucy knew what he was about to do when he bent at the knee, the fingers of his left hand becoming entangled in her coffee colored strands. She could have stopped him, should have stopped him. But she couldn't find it in herself to.

His lips pressed against her forehead softly, lingering for a second. Two. Five before he pulled away to look at her in earnest. His thumb swiped across her cheek as he tenderly told her to, "Get some rest."

The tears began to fall more freely as he walked out of the room, but her sobs only start after hearing the soft click that came from the front door.

Lucy thought she knew heartbreak but this... this was worse than any stab wound or gun shot. This was something that permeated itself deep into her heart, her soul, her mind, and the only cure had readily sealed their fate.

Read part 2, here!

#thanks for the ask! #anon #chenford fanfiction #chenford fanfic #chenford #em answers #not at all inspired by a song I've had on repeat the past two days #i am in an angsty mood forgive me #fanfic

[theproloser34]

So at the end of every year, I always find it interesting to see how my music taste has changed throughout the year. Which is why I LOVE Spotify Wrapped day and seeing what my top 5 songs of the year were. And this year, I was actually kinda surprised.

Now, it’s not wrong, I absolutely played these songs a bunch, but I wouldn’t say they were my FAVORITE songs this year. They just came out very early in the year and were able to add up plays before anything else. So that got me thinking, what were my FAVORITE songs this year? Not the ones that I played the most, but what had the most impact, whether it just be an earworm or the meaning of the song. So why not write and list them out! I like analyzing my thoughts too much.

I’ll keep my choices to just one song per artist. It'll be however many songs I wanna add. Details don’t really matter, it’s my list, I add whatever I want. Expect a VERY long posts and a lot of links to songs if you want to check them out. (DO IT. I swear I have good music taste.)

1) First off, I gotta start with DO BETTER by Ab-Soul off of his latest album HERBERT. Ab-Soul has been in my top 5 rappers probably for the past decade and my second favorite of TDE other than Kendrick. HERBERT was his most personal album to date, and nothing shows that better than DO BETTER. A lot of his album is inspired by the events that happened in his life during the pandemic including one of his best friends dying and his own failed suicide attempt and his subsequent trip to rehab. You can easily hear all the pain and survivor's guilt he has, but also the determination to turn around and come out stronger. The instrumentation is both extremely haunting and calming. I always come out of this feeling inspired to deal with my own issues. The line "I gotta do better, I gotta do better, I guided you better. There's nothing they can do that I can't do better. Better yet, there's nothing I can do that I can't do better. Yeah, I'm better," never stops giving me chills.

2) I've been slowly getting into EDM these past couple years. And one big part of my learning of the genre is Skrillex, who came back and surprise dropped TWO albums in TWO days. And both were really good albums that showed multiple different styles of EDM. Whether you prefer more dark and grungy beats like the songs in Quest For Fire, or if you rather have more bright, poppy sounds in Don't Get Too Close, there will be something for you in these two albums. The song that most stood out to me though was a good mix of the two with the opener for Quest For Fire, Leave Me Like This. The standout part of this song is the earworm of a vocal hook, which gives a wonderful strong melodic element to the song. Combined with the synths creates a strong hypnotic pre-drop section for the song. Of course the drop contains the more grungy parts of the song, especially the growly bass the introduces the drop of the song. But my favorite part of this section tis the repeated, pitched up "left, right, left" chant helps keep the rhythmic center in the song as the drums get more complex in the drop. Even if you don't enjoy EDM music, I'd listen to Skrillex's new releases because you get such a different arrangement of sounds and really see his versatility.

3) Anyone who knows me knows that I have been horribly addicted to hyperpop these past three years and it is definitely unhealthy to my ear drums. And 100 gecs has absolutely been in my top 3 hyperpop artists since they came out. So when they announced they were releasing an album this year, it was instantly one of my most anticipated albums of this year. And they absolutely delivered with 10000 Gecs. They continue to create inventive music with the same brashness, humor, and insanity that drew me to them in the first place. And I'd say this album is just slightly less abrasive to new fans than their past album. Nothing anywhere near as crazy as Money Machine, but all of the tracks contain the unique brand of energy and mix of hip-hop, rock, and pop, with and added element of ska on some songs like I Got My Tooth Removed and Frog On The Floor. But my favorite has to go to the opener of this album, Dumbest Girl Alive. Right away with the first 15 seconds, you can tell they're back on their bullshit with the opening guitar riff and gunshot impacts. And as soon as the drums come in, you get their wonderful blown out sound where I can't help but turn up my speakers to the max. But the obvious standout of this track is Laura Les's performance of this track. A super catchy melody, an earworm of a recurring phrase, "I'm the dumbest girl alive," and multiple quotable lines create a great verse. Plus the bouncy bass continuing with it creates such a wonderful short track that makes me just want to keep repeating it over and over again.

4) The more music I listen to, the more I am drawn to the weird, more eclectic styles of music. Especially with hip-hop, with so much getting made, only the really unique stuff sticks out to me now. Luckily that's the exact type of music Danny Brown and JPEGMAFIA make and together they made one of the best hip-hop albums of this year with Scaring The Hoes. And this music will, in fact, scare the hoes.

JPEGMAFIA and Danny Brown are already well known in the Abstract Hip-hop genre, each being strongly characterized by their unique self-production and unique delivery respectively. Both of them have their own unique strength and coming together, they create a landscape of sounds and tracks that you will not hear on any other hip-hop album this year. As has become pretty evident, I'm a sucker for intros. And this album is no different because the intro, Lean Beef Patty, is easily my favorite from this album and was also in my top 5 songs played this year. Even though this song is just 2 minutes, it contains my favorite things about both artists. A sped up sample almost drowned out by the rest of the production, a signature of JPEGMAFIA production. Brash, bold lyrics from JPEGMAFIA such as "Fuck y'all niggas, I feel like Papa John," and "Fuck Elon Musk, eight dollars too much," which honestly just became the slogan for the year. Finally Danny Brown's energy and delivery give an exciting final verse to this song. And wonderful way to start one of the best albums of the year.

5) A group that came out of nowhere for me was grouptherapy. grouptherapy. is a music group consisting of Jadagrace, TJOnline, and SWIM. Their new album "i was mature for my age, but i was still a child" popped up randomly in my Spotify and I was surprised by the quality of there sounds, their charisma, and their chemistry. Each artist clearly has their own style that fits well with the other two and they all trade off so well in each of their tracks, which is essential to a good group dynamic.

Their new album has multiple standouts that show all of the groups' talents such as American Psycho and FUNKFEST. But my personal favorite off of this album is "club song :(" where Jadagrace takes the front stage in a mainly acoustic guitar song. Her voice is allowed to take a front seat and it creates a striking and kinda haunting melody. TJOnline joins in the latter half of the song to add some well added harmony to the song. This was the song that I kept coming back to from this project. Check this group out, cause they should have much more buzz than they have now.

6) Every once in a while, you'll be at a concert and you'll see an opening act that completely surprises you. And then afterwards, you slowly see them gaining more and more clout as they slowly grow to superstardom. That happened to me with Jordan Ward. I had the opportunity to see him perform and a JID x Smino concert as the opener and he absolutely impressed with his energy and singing.

I forgot about him until he released the deluxe version of him latest album FORWARD. I remembered his name and decided to listen finally and he has everything to be one of the next RnB stars. Since then, his album is one a bunch of top albums of the year lists and has even had a NPR tiny desk concert.

My favorite of his so far is MUSTARD. The guitar arpeggiating the chords, the slightly pitched up vocals, and live played drums on this track just work in the best way. 6lack also joins and adds a great second verse. Listen to him, he's gonna be up next soon and you'll want to see his rise.

7) Finally, there's the artist of the year for me, Underscores. I've known of them for a while, but only REALLY got into their music this year. I devoured their last two albums and have been playing them on repeat all year until she announced her new album Wallsocket. It was easily my most anticipated album this year and luckily it exceeded all expectations.

Underscores is a very hard artist to describe because she was one of the hyperpop classic artists but has evolved her sound beyond that. There is still some of that overblown hip-hop, dance pop sound around her music, but there is also more of what I'd say is folk rock in there now with this album. Either way, she still manages to produces some of the most unique soundscapes that I've heard this year.

All three of her singles that she released were in completely different areas. The rock focused "Cops and Robbers", the creepy, slow, and uncomfortable "You don't even know who I am", or the dance EDM focused "Locals (Girls like us)" had be so confused about what the sound of the album would be like. All it did was build up the hype and so I HAD to watch the livestream of the album on release day. And that is easily on of my favorite memories of the year, freaking out with the chat as we uncovered how good of an album this is.

While every song on this project is wonderful, the song the immediately attached itself to my brain was "Uncanny long arms". The song structure here is just hypnotizing to me. The quiet opening of the song going into the first chorus and the first "I can touch my toes" belt is forever into my mind. And the vocal stuttering and breakdown afterwards let me know this song was special immediately but it only gets better.

Jane Remover has a standout second verse on this song and her voice sounds angelic and just floats over the guitar. She had an amazing year in her own career and this song is a standout moment. Her turn on the chorus is even better with added instrumentation and the pure emotion you hear in her voice.

But easily the favorite part of this track to me is the outro, which to long underscores fans will be no surprise. The song being stripped down before jumping right into a bombastic, more rock version of "Kinko's field trip" brought me right back to 2021 and I damn near screamed hearing this on the live stream. Easily my favorite music moment and favorite song of this year. Listen to underscores everyone, you won't regret it.

HONORABLE MENTIONS

I don't have anywhere near as much to say about these songs, but I still want to bring them up because they're fun and were big parts of this year for me.

Stasis - leastfavorite!: Discovered her this year and she is another hyperpop artist that I think deserves more recognition. She released her first EP late last year so listen to it!

nothing2say - Jay Kim: Another artist I discovered this year but released an EP last year. Not really hyperpop, more midwest emo vibes with a little bit of brakence vibes with him. But another album that I'm excited to see grow after listening to them this year.

Damage Gets Done - Hozier: I shouldn't have to say this on this website, but Hozier is a pretty good artist. I listened to the new album he dropped this year and this duet was a standout to me and just couldn't get out of my head.

Maybe Man - AJR: As we now know, I'm a sucker for openers, and damn, is AJR good at them. They always make them fit the themes and sounds of the albums so well. "Maybe Man" is no exception. Probably would've made it onto the favorites list is it came out sooner.

Alright that's it. This post is long enough. Please listen to them! I swear they're good! And I promised not to always talk about music this long! (It's still gonna happen sometimes though. I'm sorry, I can't stop myself.) Also please share your favorite songs! I love seeing people's music tastes and what really connects with them!

#music #long post #ab soul #ajr #100 gecs #jpegmafia #skrillex #danny brown #hozier #jay kim #underscores #jordan ward #grouptherapy! #top 2023 #Spotify #leastfavorite! #why did I write so much

[elvenbeard]

I have too many VP ideas HELP. I need to write them down somewhere where I'll find them again so here we go, what is a blog if not a notepad?

Done:

part one of an attempt at making a big edit - gonna be a set of four pics, revolving around Vince's Arasaka past and how merc life is honestly the same shit, just a different packaging (the project I mentioned earlier this week that I needed a lot of pics for XD it's also inpsired by a song that fits him so well that I've been listening to non-stop on repeat basically for two weeks now xD) ✅ done!!

the harness photoshoot: gonna make two photosets here too, one a bit more clothed than the other xD ✅done!! :D

Currently in progress/still need to edit:

A photoset of V through the years (inspired by several other's amazing takes on this <3) - headcanon/lore posts for the most important moments or timeframes in his life -> pics taken, still need editing and writing though xD

V showing Kerry some of his favourite places in the city and vice versa -> started this, but now I wanna write something for everything too and aaahh xD

Some pics to accompany the post-canon fic I spontaneously started writing -> have a couple taken already, need editing still

Part two of the big edit thingy from above: with more song lyrics that just hit the spot XD -> have a few pics taken but might scrap and redo them

Currently not started on these yet, but the ideas are not leaving my head and/or have been with me for a bit (some a lot more complex than others):

Dirtbike tour through the badlands, because hell yes - would like to incorporate this in a little fic somehow, post-canon but not too far in the future

Just V chilling with Nibbles in the penthouse garden - the grass may be fake, but I think it's been a while for both of them since they touched grass and they deserve some peace and happiness XD (might incorporate this in the same story/ time frame as the idea above - we'll see!)

V and Kerry hanging out, listening to music

Kinky Kings (I am tempted to change their ship name ngl xD but I think I'll keep it and do a cool photoshoot instead)

Some promotional pics (sorta) for Kerry's new album (potentially in black and white? I'm not sure yet but I'd really like to do a bw set!!)

Not really a big VP thingy, but I've wanted to do a headcanon post about Kerry's cyberware, what all of it is and does and when/how he got it/ had to get it - need close up pics for some of that though (and any excuse to look at Kerry for prolonged periods of time honestly)

V and Kerry on a bike tour through the city at night - no deeper meaning here other than "let's blow off some steam" "okay :3" *five minutes later* "okay, this is not what I had in mind o.o but still fun!" (also Night City at night <3 but I have no idea yet how to pull it off with traffic and all probably running me over repeatedly as I set this up, but we shall see xD gonna be an interesting challenge for sure!)

More photo stories with V and Jackie, but no concrete ideas here yet

A photo story/ fic with pics of "that one perfect morning" I mentioned in a oneshot once, meaning the morning after Boat Drinks - also ties in a bit with the "favourite places" idea) - I am also tempted to do this as a comic instead, but don't even get me started on my comic ideas and all that's in progress there... the day needs more hours!

Also I wanna do more spicy stuff :3c but no concrete ideas here yet (maybe I'll redo the window photoshoot some time because with the graphics update their reflections might look even nicer... we shall see though!)

Road Trip with V and Kerry!!

Just some nice aesthetic model-y shots with Vince because he's pretty xD

#cyberpunk 2077 #don't know how to tag this aaah #vp ideas #so that I actually find it again when I'm looking for it

[drewzelle]

“nine mutuals you want to know better” tag game!

Tagged by @sarenhale ! I didn't have access to my computer the past couple days so I'm a bit late, but this was a lot of fun!! Thank you for the tag <3

Last Song: lately I've been relaxing to the Hollow Knight OST (City of Tears best track) but in terms of lyrical music, I recently rewatched the music video for "Little Dark Age" by MGMT because its vibes are fucking impeccable and mesmerizing (I can watch it on repeat for hours)

Favorite Color: purple is my go-to answer (especially blue-ish purples), but I also really love dark greens and desaturated earthy colors so much

Last Movie/TV Show: I feel like I haven't been watching movies lately (I'm more of a show person because I like longer form narratives) but I think the last one I watched was "Better Off Dead" while I was visiting my family for the holidays. It was a weird/surreal but good time! As for shows, I finally got around to watching Scavenger’s Reign!! Every aspect was just amazing, especially the worldbuilding and visuals. 2D animation is probably my favorite medium, so I'm really glad we're seeing more animation for adults that wants to tell a story instead of being a delivery device for lame sex jokes and cringe humor. OH ALSO DUNGEON MESHI!!! For a lot of the same reasons! Excited to watch the new episode tonight :>

Sweet / Spicy / Savory: I have a HUGE sweet tooth, so if I had to pick one, that would be it. Savory foods are great and I love them, I just have a leftover "now's your chance!" impulse from not being allowed much sugar as a kid that I can't seem to get rid of. I'm also weak to the "I deserve a lil treat" trap if I've got a bunch of sweet snacks around, so I have to be careful. As for spicy….I am SO completely unable to handle spicy food it’s almost funny, but really it’s just tragic because I LOVE cuisines known for being spicy, like mexican and thai. If I eat out, I always have to be like “can you please make it mild?” and even then, if it's not seasoned for the babiest of babies, my mouth will burn and my weak, white-person tummy will hurt.

Relationship Status: I keep forgetting I’m getting married in less than six months. My partner and I got engaged like two years ago and have lived together for almost five, so my brain just defaults to "there’s probably a guy nearby" and doesn’t think much deeper on it than that.

Last thing I googled: "morels" because I was discussing mushrooms with my friend and those are some cool lookin' guys! Shaggy ink caps too!

Current Obsession: …….One Piece 😅 I was a big fan as a teen but only got as far as the Skypiea arc before I fell off reading/watching it. The hype over the new live action version reminded me the series existed, so I’ve been not so slowly making my way through again, picking up where I left off. I love how absolutely bonkers, there-are-no-rules, anime-ass-anime it is, but also how genuine and heartfelt it can be. I also enjoy how character-driven so much of the plot is which works because of how interesting the characters are (Chopper, Robin, and Franky are my favs). I just got to the timeskip, so I’m maybe…halfway through? between this and BG3, RIP my free time lol

Last Book: I've been reading through Seiji Yoshida's "Houses with a Story" (slowly, because I want to really take it in and savor it) and it's been a delight. Very relaxing and inspiring :> (up next, I finally got copies of the Locked Tomb series, so soon I will be enjoying The Space Lesbians)

Looking forward to: Being able to organize and enjoy my "new" office space after some hectic days! My partner and I realized we barely spend any time in our bedroom except for sleeping, so we swapped my office into the bigger room in our apartment! There were some complications with getting the internet working on my PC, but we finally got it all smoothed out. Now I finally have all my books and sewing/crafting/creative stuff in one place without it feeling cramped or hiding things away in storage :>

Thank you again for the tag! I'm tagging @justagoos, @icicleteeth, @lunarliart, @saltsparkle, @fael-draws, @juliedillon, @ninamodaffari, @crabdominalpain, and the final slot for anyone else who wants to join in - but please don't feel obligated, this is just for fun! :>

#thanks again for the tag Saren :D #it was fun to read yours and I'm excited to read some for the people I tagged! #drew says words #personal.txt #tag game #long post

[porcelainseashore]

ask game!! (i wish i could ask them all)

🦴🍬🍄

your unpopular opinion better not be that chris is ugly!! jk obv :)))))

Of course, my dear Liz, I would NEVER say Chris is ugly 🤣😏 Ty for the asks though, it's nice to see you here in my little space! 💝

🦴 ⇢ is there a piece of media that inspires your writing? 

Yes! Actually, mostly songs, but a couple of times books and series as well. I'll name them here:

Ghosts from the Past from the Where We Left Our Love series was inspired by the Suspiria film remake. I had thought up both parts from the start and always wanted to have it eventually set in Berlin, with an antagonist like Madame Blanc.

Heavenly Creatures was inspired by Wolf Alice's song of the same name and both the book and series Normal People by Sally Rooney. I just loved the idea of a secret relationship between two people who seemed to be so different, yet understood each other like no one else could.

Us was inspired by Ethel Cain's Michelle Pfeiffer and the book and series One Day by David Nicholls. I literally had the song on repeat for days and for once, felt compelled to write a fluffy romance between two friends who had the potential to be so much more.

🍬 ⇢ post an unpopular opinion about a popular fandom character

It's a cop out, but honestly I can't think of an unpopular opinion I have about an RE character. Guess that makes me a populist? Anyway, imo the only interesting thing that Chris has ever done in the RE series was to lead the Hound Wolf Squad and go rogue against BSAA. I would also like to see Ada on her own and not as a crutch romantic interest for someone else's *cough* personal development. Don't know if those are unpopular enough though! 😁

🍄 ⇢ share a head canon for one of your favourite ships or pairings

I've not been super into ships for RE, also considering how Capcom decided to write off any sort of viable romance between the characters. However, I did like Cleon when I was young and my hc would be that they created a found family together with Sherry and are living happily ever after (as much as they can possibly with the circumstances) rent-free in my head 🫶

#writing inspiration #writers ask game #porcelainasks

[dreadsuitsamus]

👀

this is from an angsty vegeta wip inspired by a post malone song!

You walk until the wine bottle is empty before heading home. Your alcohol tolerance has gone up a rather frightening amount, along with your desire to drink in the first place. It used to make you numb, but now it merely fills a void created by the larger void you no longer get to fill. You aren't drunk, but you are buzzed enough to feel bold when you approach the house again and see a light on. Warmth spreads through you, your face heating as if you've suddenly been thrown into a sauna.

Your lips curl into a snarl. Looks like someone finally found it necessary to show up for his anniversary. You stomp up the steps and loudly make your way inside, and are met with a battered, angry Vegeta standing with his arms crossed. His lips are sneering and his jaw is tight.

"What?" You snap, kicking the door shut behind you.

"Where have you been?"

"Ha! What's it to you?" This was bad. You'd been drinking, he'd just finished training. Both of you were too fired up and angry to be speaking to each other, the risk of consequences entirely too real. And though you recognized it, you promptly told the angel on your shoulder to fuck off. It's way past time he got a piece of your mind.

"'What's it to me?'" He repeats with a scoff. "Who the hell do you think you're talking to? I am-!"

"ThE pRinCe oF aLl SaIyAnS." You mock, setting down the empty wine bottle and removing your coat. "Yeah, I know. That where you been lately? Prince-ing all the Saiyans? Oh wait."

If all these walls could talk, they would tell me sit down, man, shut the fuck up.

Vegeta was angry before, but now he's furious. You crossed a line, an incredibly sensitive one, just to hurt him. You've professed your love for him for years and years now; how could you think to hurt him like this? His nostrils flare and his hands are now clenched at his sides.

However, as wine makes you bold and warms your iced veins, you don't stand down. Your angry eyes meet his and you stand as tall as you can. His eyes glance to your emptied wine bottle and then he scoffs in disgust. "You've been drinking, you vile woman. Have you reached two bottles a day yet?" His tone is mocking, angry, just as yours had been.

"You can notice I've been drinking more often but you can't even remember your own anniversary?" You'd never be fast enough to land a punch, but it didn't keep you from wanting to swing anyway.

"You place too much importance on such things."

"You don't place enough!" You scream, stepping closer.

"It's not important." He starts closing the gap. "Of every little thing in this world, you choose to celebrate that day every year like we don't already know the day I began to court you. Nothing has changed, so what is the point, woman?!"

"A lot has changed, Vegeta! You, specifically, have changed. This is the most we've even spoken in weeks. And we're arguing."

"Maybe you should put down the bottle then." He spits. "And be in your right mind for once."

It takes you both by surprise. His eyes widen when he feels the contact on his cheek, and you furrow your brows when you feel the sting on your hand. You didn't even register your hand moving. Somehow Vegeta didn't see it coming either and allowed you to blindside him.

The back of your mind screams that it's because he has so much trust in you, and you can practically feel some of it siphoning back to him, slowly.

#vegeta x you #vegeta x reader #asks #wip

[sam-loves-seb]

new year's ask game for fic writers:

thanks for the tags @mybrainismelted and @rayrayor !

1) What fic did you have the most fun writing this year and why? Or, if you can’t decide, what was most fun about writing this year for you?

i had the most fun writing what we stay alive for this past year, it was really a passion project of mine that turned into this wonderful labor of love

2) What’s a scene/story that you finished and felt “wow, I really accomplished that, that actually went so well”?

probably loving you with no conditions, i've always really wanted to write a fic with that premise but i put it off for a long time because i was worried i wouldn't do it justice. but in the end, i think people really liked it, and it's one of the fics i'm most proud of tbh

3) What helped provide the most inspiration for stories, if anything? Was it poetry? A song on repeat? A gorgeous gifset? A walk outside? A book you read that made you want to change everything? Whatever it was! Tell all.

unfortunately the thing that inspires me most continues to be running/exercise. i cannot even begin to tell you how many plot bunnies/outlines i wrote in my head during runs last summer when i was training for a race. idk what it is, but when i'm locked in with my headphones on, my mind starts to wander and it gives me some really good ideas (and some wild ones, but those are fun too from a creative standpoint)

4) What is something you want to share about what you’ve written this year? A particular line, a comment that made you feel really good, a scene that was difficult to write — you get to choose! What do you wish someone would ask you about when it comes to what you’ve written?

god, i don't know. i've gotten a lot of really wonderful comments this year, too many to pick just one.

a scene that was difficult to write would probably be all of chapter four of orange juice, that fic overall is hard to write (but i still want to finish it someday)

but i write more fluff than anything so i also wanted to add a scene that was really fun to write, and that was writing mickey high as fuck in i need you (like cake on my birthday)

and to start off 2024…

1) Do you have any writing/creation goals for the year? What are they?

my goal for the year is to write two (2) complete multi-chapter fics. i mostly exist in the oneshot world in the shameless fandom, but i miss plotting big long fics and i really want to try and stick with at least two this year.

2) Is there a fic or idea that you’re really excited to be able to continue to work on in the new year (shout out to my fellow fic writing folks who take forever to finish wips, sometimes it’s nice to be able to continue working on something even if you wish you’d gotten it done! Now you get even MORE time with it!)

i think rock star mickey au is the idea that i most want to see come to life in 2024. i've been plotting it in my head since like july and one day i want to be confident enough to actually write the vision that plays on a loop in my subconscious.

3) What’s something new in your writing you want to try/are going to try? A different writing style? Different fandom? Darker works? Fluffier? Longer or shorter?

god, i mean, i guess i want to try writing more smut? i don't write a lot of it rarely any ever but i want to put a little bit in my big bang fic, and maybe some in some other fic ideas i have too. so yeah. maybe i'll try more of that in 2024 idk don't quote me on it.

4) What’s something you love about your own writing that you will continue to appreciate in the new year?

honestly i really like the way i write dialogue. it sounds very natural to me, idk if anyone else agrees, but when i re-read some of my fics i'm just like yeah exactly he would say that

(and maybe it's bad or wildly out of character but idk. i like it.)

tagging anyone who wants to play <3 happy 2024 my friends!

#tag game #new year's ask game #fic writer

[gingerbreadmonsters]

director's cut for 'motion capture' anddd 'you're the cat's meow'?????

star and zo are talking about this ask game (still open!)

damn we're going in HARD!!! thank you babes for asking about these because the world of motion capture is one of my all time favourites that i've done - elliott nation star and zo stay winning 🤩🤩🤩

the fics in question: motion capture + you're the cat's meow! spoilers for both of those under the cut 💕💕

ever since elliott and sunshine got caught and captured in canon i wanted to write something about that, but the concept for motion capture only really materialised properly in the summer when scorpius' first audio ('A Deal With a Demon') dropped - it's no secret that i LOVE me an unreliable narrator, and that dramatic irony is my favourite thing EVER, and what better way to combine those than with a brainwashed elliott??

brain stuff and the manipulation of minds and thoughts has always been a massive thing for me in my writing - i think it's incredibly versatile and adds lovely dimension, whether in terms of the way your worldview changes when you're in love with someone, or the inherent horror of not being able to trust your own mind and sensibility 😍😍 i bring it up a lot, but i think elliott and sunshine fit both of those very nicely, so it was only natural to give elliott a taste of that hehe

i don't think i made it very clear in the actual fic, but the song that elliott wakes up to is 'You Are The Sunshine Of My Life' by stevie wonder - the title is, of course, delightful for these two, and the particular bit of the song that elliott hears is MAGNIFICENTLY painful in the context of the fic 🥰🥰 i was kind of thinking about those, like, late 90s and 00s american teen movies where they always like to start with a pop song that plays over the opening montage, that melts into the protagonist waking up and hitting snooze or stopping the song bc it's their alarm - you know the kind i mean? and of course, this fic was inspired by the elliott fic of all elliott fics, rowan's bring me a dream, which incorporates music BEAUTIFULLY - it felt like the appropriate thing to do 🤩💖🫰

this fic was actually meant to unfold very differently, and you can kind of see bits of that original storyline that never got used - there's a set up with the deodorant and the left hand door of the closet that was supposed to pay off later, but never really comes to anything. elliott was supposed to be looking for something (i think it was going to be a hoodie?) and realise that it was probably behind that door, and then when he opened it he'd find all of sunshine's clothes - that was going to be what fucked up his brain, but alas i couldn't find a way to make it work 😫😫

there were also meant to be more pages in elliott's notebook!! i actually had some of them ready to go when i scrapped the idea, but it was getting too confusing - basically, before he left for closeknit, past-elliott would have written an "if you're reading this, i'm dead" letter in the back of the book, which present-elliott was going to find and absolutely lose his mind over what that implies about his life right now! it was a good idea, but the logistics behind it were too complicated - why would elliott only be finding that letter now, instead of days or weeks or months ago? what's special about today? what's different? it was all getting too much, so unfortunately that had to go 😭😭

my favourite favourite bit from the whole thing is DEFINITELY the bit where he makes tea - the line "(The mug is blue. Elliott is lactose intolerant.)" is, in my opinion, one of my all-time best lines i've ever done, and i love the way that whole bit came out 🥰🥰 the way he tries to rationalise and deny what's very clearly happened, the way the narration starts to repeat and bleed over itself.... UGH it was so much fun to write hehe 🥳🥳🥳

it took AGES to try and logic my way through exactly how elliott was able to keep himself alive in the flat, and the logic i ended up with isn't entirely watertight but i think it does the job! he needed to be getting food, water, electricity etc but no internet, and he couldn't be allowed to independently leave the house because i needed him to not accidentally run into people he knew on the street who might give the game away - but at the same time, people who know him (like family, friends, people from his job etc) needed to not raise the alarm that he hasn't been seen for some indefinite period of time 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫

(in my mind, what happened was that closeknit was able to (by hook or by crook) get elliott assigned to one of their own people on some big 'top-secret' project that needed total secrecy and probably an extended stay abroad or in another state or something, and then to distribute that fact via elliott's phone (that they've definitely had access to, bc we know that the SIM card has been removed) to his family and friends - that way, nobody would go looking for him and radio silence wouldn't be too suspicious. obviously they wouldn't be able to keep this up forever, but i imagine that a) closeknit intends to kill elliott before long, regardless of blake's promise to sunshine, and b) this was all done in a bit of a hurry, when they captured elliott and sunshine and were then like "oh fuck what do we do now", and that panic is part of the reason why scorpius' memory modification didn't quite work correctly!)

the idea of the locket came from lyric on discord, who was kind enough to listen to me kick and scream about how i had no idea how to resolve all of this and then zapped me with the biggest brainwave imaginable - this is another shameless reference to a real locket that i own lol (the same one that gavin is wearing in get in, loser!) ✌️✌️ i loved the idea of elliott getting hit with that huge wave of dread and confusion as he looks at something that very clearly shouldn't be possible if the world is as he thinks it is - basically, he's seeing a glitch in the matrix and it's terrifying!!

i don't know if it came through very clearly in the narration, but in that last bit what happens is as follows:

elliott drops the pen, and kneels down to pick it up

he notices something shiny under the sofa, and sticks his head underneath there so that he can reach it

while he's still under there, he picks it up - it's a locket - and opens it, confused because he's already wearing an identical one

his is empty, but the one he found is not, containing a picture of him and sunshine, and the words "for my sunshine." - overwhelmed by the undeniable proof that something is very very wrong, it triggers a bout of lightheadedness

he tries to hold onto the memory, but hits his head on the underneath of the sofa, dropping the locket back where he found it and causing him to lose focus just long enough for the lightheadedness to make him forget

it's implied that this has happened before, and will continue to happen every day indefinitely

(also, "navy blue cotton" is a reference to thy fair imperfect shade, my first elliott fic - it has no bearing on the story here, it's just for fun hehe 🥳🥳)

we can definitely talk about you're the cat's meow!, although it's quite short so there might not be much to say! they both take place in the same universe, and i'd had that song in the back pocket for a few months at least - although it was meant for a fluff fic, i'm a sucker for tonal dissonance... 🤩🤩🤩

this fic is, to me, the chaser to motion capture - not so much a narrative foil, but showing that closeknit didn't keep their promises to either of them. sunshine was told that elliott's off living a normal, happy life (he's emphatically not), and elliott was under the impression that sunshine didn't even exist (they do, but not for much longer if blake keeps chipping away at them).

i do hope it's clear, but just so we're all on the same page:

closeknit did not give sunshine a radio - that's them singing the same song over and over again in an attempt to comfort themselves and block out what's really going on

the 'house in the forest' that blake keeps burning down is the one from elliott's BA that he and sunshine designed together

the 'little friend' who has a nightmare is blake's listener - his one weakness, and inadvertently the reason why blake's goal to talk to brachium has yet to succeed

the reason sunshine is still there is because they won't give in - in their mind, they've pivoted to protecting elliott the way they couldn't do physically, and so blake is now having to try and wear them down in order make them pliable enough to get access to brachium

sunshine is wearing a straitjacket - that's why the jacket is so 'cuddly and soft', and why their arms specifically are so warm

#ooh a game! #redacted asmr #redacted audio #god DAMN this was a long reply i do apologise #but i love talking motion capture!! it really is one of my favourite things i've written and i love it to bits so thank you 🥰🥰 #zo beloved <3 #star beloved <3 #ginger speaks to lovely blogs

[acacia-may]

Hello! Can I please request a mini playlist for Langris and Vanessa’s friendship? I never considered the possibility them being friends until I read Wine Therapy (which is my favorite fic of yours by the way!), and I love the idea that they would get along well and bond over their somewhat similar childhood trauma. Thank you!! 😊

Hi Greta! Thank you so much for the ask and for your very kind words about "Wine Therapy." I'm absolutely delighted to hear that you enjoyed it so much and that it got you thinking about the possibility of a Vanessa and Langris friendship. 😊 Here are a few songs I've picked out the remind me of them and their friendship! Some of these songs are little heavier on the angst than I imagine their dynamic actually is, but the overall sentiment is similar. Also, I opened and closed this playlist with two songs that I actually listened to on repeat while writing "Wine Therapy." 😁

I felt like some of these songs were a bit more out of the box than the songs I've generally been picking for this game, so I provided a brief discussion about why I picked them. Unfortunately, as my health is poor, there won't be a lot of song discussion at the moment, but I tried my best to be thoughtful in my selections. I hope you will find some that you like! 💕

Perfect For You by Rachel Platten [A/N: This is one of the songs that inspired "Wine Therapy" and I listened to it on repeat while writing. To me it really summarizes what bonded Langris and Vanessa in the first place--this concept that they're both done "trying to be perfect" for their terrible parents]

Beautiful World by The Chevin (YouTube Link) [Vanessa encouraging Langris]

So Much Wine by Phoebe Bridgers (YouTube Link) [Recognizing each other's struggles (especially Langris worrying about Vanessa since she's usually the one who might try to hide or run away from her pain with the help of wine. Though in the context of "Wine Therapy" Langris is, arguably, kind of doing the same thing (in his defense though, he didn't intend to get drunk--he's just a light weight). It's a dark song but this line hits hard (especially in this context): "There's only so much wine that you can drink in one life, and it will never be enough to save you from the bottom of your glass"]

Feel Alive by Katie Herzig (YouTube Link) [Also Vanessa encouraging Langris]

Moonlight by Grace VanderWaal (YouTube Link) [Recognizing each other's struggles despite their attempts to hide or mask it. Langris hides under being the "perfect poster child" and Vanessa hides by "always [having] a smile." (But again this one feels a little more like Langris worrying about Vanessa to me). I especially like the line: "A doll made out of glass: all her friends think that she's great. But I can see through it all, and she's about to break"]

Superman by Rachel Platten (YouTube Link) [Vanessa about/to Langris though I suppose it could go both ways depending on the situation]

Tightrope by Nia Hendricks (YouTube Link) [Though this feels more Vanessa to me, it's really them both kind of resolving to more forward and heal from the past by supporting each other, I think--in a more platonic sense that this song seems to imply though]

You're Somebody Else by Flora Cash (YouTube Link) [This song also inspired "Wine Therapy" and really speaks to the idea of seeing past the surface to who someone really is and realizing there is much more to them than they (possibly) can't even see in themselves]

I've included a few bonus ramblings about Langris and Vanessa under the cut because I do love this friendship and got a little carried away talking about it when trying to properly reply to your ask 😅 (Warnings: mentions their childhood trauma)

Thank you for playing my Mini-Playlist Ask Game! 😊

Langris and Vanessa's friendship is definitely one of my favourite Black Clover dynamics to think about these days, but to tell you the absolute truth, it wasn't really something I had considered much before my sister and I made up this ridiculous AU about Langris deciding his true calling is to be become a traveling bard and sing sea shanties in bars [and in this AU, he kept running into Vanessa at the bars and they developed this sort of bantering brother-sister-like friendship that was just really fun]. Then when I started writing "Yellow Flowers" and exploring the similarities between Vanessa and Finral's childhood trauma for that story, I really began to realize that Vanessa and Langris have a lot of similarities in that regard as well.

I really feel like if Langris and Finral are two opposite ends of a types of childhood trauma spectrum then Vanessa is in the middle in a way [i.e. she was neglected and ignored like Finral, but she was also objectified by her parent (seen only for her usefulness to Her Majesty) and held to unattainable standards of perfection like Langris]. I like to think that in that way she could bond with both of them and become just as good a friend to Langris as she is to Finral someday. Given her similar life experiences to him and how naturally intuitive she is, I think it would be easier for Vanessa to kind of "read between the lines" with Langris and see that he has a lot going on under the surface that he doesn't usually let people see. And Langris, in turn, recognizes that a part of Vanessa is actually hurting (even though she generally buries that pain in favor of being cheerful and positive because she would much rather be the shoulder for others instead of the one opening up about her own struggles), because he knows firsthand how painful it is to have a parent like Her Majesty. I think my song choices hinted at this, but in my mind, their shared experiences really afford them the opportunity to be vulnerable with each other and open up about things that they otherwise probably wouldn't feel comfortable discussing with anyone else who didn't have that same kind of understanding. (I suppose it's a similar concept to a support group in that way). I also just love their banter with each other too. Vanessa can absolutely match wits with Langris and hold her own against him, and I find that kind of dynamic positively delightful (and gosh it is so, so good for him to have someone in his life who calls him out on his garbage). I'm glad to hear that I'm not the only one who likes the idea of them becoming friends! 😊

#langris vaude #vanessa enoteca #langris and vanessa would be great friends i'm convinced #thank you so much for the ask #this one was very self-indulgent for me 😅 i hope you like it too #Greta 💐 #playlist ask game

[rufusrant]

Florence + the Machine - Ceremonials: Album Review

I can't believe how long it took me to do this, considering the fun I had reviewing Lungs. But late is better than never.

As different songs are present and absent on both the standard and deluxe versions of Ceremonials, I've decided to combine the two. That means Breath of Life is present, along with the bonus tracks. However, I've cut out reviewing the acoustic and demo tracks of songs already present on the album, with the exception of Landscape.

With that said, let's plunge in headfirst!

#1: Only If For A Night

This was inspired by a dream Florence had about her late grandmother, in which she told Florence to, ad verbatim, “concentrate on her perfect career”. It’s such a bittersweet, ethereal song that sets us up so well for recurring themes of loss and grief on this album.

For me, this song is so tame compared to the dive of darkness the album takes later — and even though I like the song overall and love the story it tells, I regret to say that although it works as an opening song I find it the weakest one yet out of all 5 albums so far from a musical standpoint. 6/10.

#2: Shake It Out

HHHHHH. I’m sorry. I can’t stand this one. I feel that this is very much the Dog Days Are Over of Ceremonials, but even Dog Days is enjoyable to listen to. Though I appreciate the triumph in Florence’s vocals and the vow to renew and restart herself in the lyrics, I mostly find the production of this one so overblown that it strips the song of its rightful poignancy, and has thus truthfully never struck that much of a chord with me. 4/10.

#3: What The Water Gave Me

Florence said My Drowning Obsession’s Back, Baby! 

The subtle rock beat, harp and shivery yet strong, solid vocals inspired by Virginia Woolf really shine here. Though it doesn’t have as huge or overwhelming a sound as compared to some of the band’s other water songs, there’s no doubt that you still feel Florence’s deep, cavernous body of water lapping at your knees as the harp trills and her voice glides over the surface. 7.5/10.

#4: Never Let Me Go

This song always reduces me to tears. I don’t think I’ve any way to aptly express what exactly this song means to me without having a crisis, so here’s the gist:

It’s a love song, a Don’t Forget About Me song, a grief song, a song about someone making peace with dying even though they’d like to stay and heading back to the source of all life — the arms of the ocean. The lyrics and Florence’s delivery of them are so unbelievably beautiful, sad and mournfully heartfelt. The instrumentals all around enhance the melancholy that just consumes you like a wave, and for this reason I can absolutely understand why Florence avoided performing this for the past 10 years. But nowadays I’m genuinely so glad that she’s in a better place than when she wrote this and is willing to perform it once again. 10/10. 

#5: Breaking Down

I know this is meant to be a song about depression but for screwball reasons that even I can’t fully understand, I’ve always thought this song had such “hey there demons it’s me ya boi” vibes. But I can’t help but think that it also describes Florence and the personification of her said depression holding hands so well, like they’re friends keeping each other company, repeating I think I’m breaking down again like a mantra that’s ironically supposed to keep them grounded. And I think that’s a huge mood.

But despite that, I find that I don’t really think very much about this song, and it doesn’t stand out that much in this album. 6/10.

#6: Lover To Lover

The sheer POWER of this song. It’s a fuck-all song, that’s why. There’s no salvation for me now and I’m gonna go to hell, but that’s alright. Florence stated that she wanted to make this song feel like it’s sung by a male soul singer, and thank you Florence because I feel that this showcases one of her most excellent hurricane-force vocals ever. 9/10. 

#7: No Light, No Light

Florence delivers a double act here with yet another of her best vocals. She goes from soft morning shy to loud, pounding cathedral voice. I find it so interesting that in both these songs one is about not giving a damn about herself anymore and this one here is about feeling insecure and immensely troubled by love. Coupled with the poetic lyrics conveying feelings of trepidation, of having to face fears and ugly truths, the song is so palpable; the song feels like an almighty plea for some higher power to lighten the pain yet a chastise of a partner who just can’t see eye to eye with her. The duality of this woman. 9/10.

#8: Seven Devils

This song is in hell. It’s so atmospheric and it really feels like a war or disaster is about to rage on. The slow, dark crawl of the drums and piano during the chorus is so skin-crawling, I can feel it drip over me like water. 9/10.

#9: Heartlines

A much-needed levity in the middle of the dark — surprising, but much needed. With upbeat drums, Florence’s inspiring message of simply following your heart and the grand imagery of journeying there delivers. It paints luscious, rejoicing visuals that fittingly feel like a reprieve from the siege that happened in the previous track. Unlike the last time she did a breather song in Lungs (Between Two Lungs after the epic Drumming Song), this song definitely feels more solid, more of its own thing and undoubtedly catchier. 7.5/10.

#10: Spectrum

GAY RIGHTS GAY RIGHTS. It feels so fun and starry and is a proper club-jumper, but because of that this song feels jarringly out of place on this album, even with the lightheartedness of both the preceding and succeeding track. 5.5/10. 

#11: All This And Heaven Too

One of the best songs there is about writer’s block. Because what is writer’s block if not your heart trying to express itself with all the best words and then screaming when it can’t. Creation is a divine thing and Florence really makes us feel it with this.

I really adore this from a musical standpoint because it sounds so harmonic and falls into place in a somehow easier way than any other song on this album. And I love how despite it’s really about frustration, Florence sings so hopefully, and why not, because writer’s block is always meant to be temporary and soon we’ll be up and creating again. 9/10.

#12: Leave My Body

I used to be so frightened of this song. Now it’s one of my favourites off the album. In the vein of grieving and with the themes of death on Ceremonials, Florence really does give one final grand moment with this one — it’s so strikingly mournful and has so much strength in it, especially when we discover that this song is how Florence describes the all-encompassing feeling of ascending as she performs live: it appears to be a song about dying and your soul exiting your body, but it’s actually about living purely in the moment and being here now, and I think that is such a beautifully genius, absolutely perfect duality to end the album on. Her melismatic vocals enhance the ocean of sound, both a send-off and yet a fully-live thrumming of the soul. 10/10.

#13: Breath Of Life

Recorded and released for the 2012 film Snow White and the Huntsman, this song is exactly what Florence + the Machine were MADE to do. The annihilating orchestral sound, Florence singing majestically with a backup choir, and the heart-pounding drums make this a brilliant dark fantasy song, albeit more PG than the holy terrors of Seven Devils but on a louder, more majestic-feeling scale. 9/10.

#14: Take Care - BBC Live At Maida Vale

A Drake cover. I did not realise this cover existed until fairly recently this year, but it’s definitely more of a pleasant surprise. In terms of a live cover it sounds much better than Florence’s cover of The Beatles’ Oh! Darling and I like the use of the piano, but when compared to the original song, I find that I like them both an equal amount. 5/10.

#15: Remain Nameless

I can never remember anything about this song. It’s one of the Florence songs I know exist, but always forget about. To me it just sounds so stilted, way too downbeat and repetitive. And I’m sorry, but Florence just sounds like she’s on the verge of falling asleep and jolting awake to go higher at random points. 1.5/10.

#16: Strangeness And Charm

Florence wakes up fully and kicks it up a notch immediately, matching the reactive, almost explosive quality of this chemistry-inspired song. The lyrics here incorporate scientific terms so naturally, combined with the general upbeat quality of the melody and Florence just sounding like she’s having a gas make for a generally cool song! However, as compared to what we’re going to hear next… 6.5/10.

#17: Bedroom Hymns 

I’m an asexual, but this song FUCKS SO HARD. This has been my top-played song on Spotify for the past two years. This song is the definition of le petite mort. This song resurrects the dead. This song is both Creation and the Apocalypse. It’s so tight, infectious, demonically horny, shoots both light and darkness out of it all at once, and that howl of Florence’s is primally perfect. 11/10. 

#18: Landscape - Demo

This is the most finished demo I have ever heard. It’s almost a pop number with the lively drums and Florence’s striding vocals, but the lyrics speak of a woman seeming to struggle with herself and her mental health, complete with a past that’s not exactly bright. Still, I all around like this one, and is definitely the other track next to Bedroom Hymns that I wish had made it onto the standard version! 7.5/10.

Overview: There's no doubt that this is the band's darkest and most emotionally fraught work to date, with so many songs about death, drowning, and straight-up leaving your body. Florence herself was going through the worst of her own pain and addiction at this era of her life, and thus I think that speaks for itself. Looking back on this album must not be the most joyous experience in the world, and I can't blame her at all.

Ceremonials was my favourite album for the majority of my time as an F+TM fan, because I discovered it during a rough period in my own life and it made me feel truly seen and heard. But that doesn't mean that as I heal and move on I don't love this album as dearly as when I first found it. Ceremonials is made from pain, because of pain, and for that I love it even more for being there when I needed it, with Florence's almighty sound to wash over me and remind me that I should pick myself up while I am very much alive. 9/10.

Stream Ceremonials on Spotify!

#florence + the machine #ceremonials #florence welch #album review

[kingtwolf-fang]

Jezabel

Everyone has kept the company of a Jezebel spirited woman in their life. May it have been a lover, a sister, a friend etc. What is a Jezebel spirit you ask? Or who is Jezabel? Webster dictionary says

noun

Also Douay Bible, Jez·a·bel . the wife of Ahab, king of Israel. 1 Kings 16:31.

(often lowercase) a wicked, shameless woman.

I had a Jezabel spirit in my life for the past 9 years. I didn't discover she was a Jezabel until the past two years. Her shameless treatment toward me, or what she has become shamelessness about her actions. However the Jezabel spirit has inspired me to write before. Back in 2015 I wrote a song titled Jezabel however I've given it some re-workings especially now that I have matured in my music and literary writing.

Living in lust betraying the men and women's company you kept trust. A shameless wicked woman casting her spells. May God deal with you accordingly and cast you into deepest part of hell.

Your Jezabel spirit a charade to any mortal man

A siren singing her hypnotizing song with a caressing hand

Shameless diverting in adulterous affairs

A irresistible spirit a man to fight it one would not dare

The Gemini spirit a mistress Jekyll a woman's version of a Dr. Hyde

Tortured souls finally free the day your spirit is crucified

Your sins will be a art gallery all over town

Accompanied with my uneasiness of you playing me like a clown

My tribe and I are ready for your vanquish

Causing my thoughts to be full of anguish

Pre-Chorus (chanting)

Aywa aywa aywa oooooooooo ya (eagle screech sound)

Ja-ja-ja-jayuwa ja-ja-ja-jayuwa

Chorus

Jezabel, jezabel, jezabel

aywa aywa, aywa

The tribe has spoken Jezabel this is your fate

Our ancestors fiery flames await

Na-lusa-chi the great shadow to eat your soul

A memory that will haunt me in my nights sleep

Something any mortal man would not wish to keep

Verse 2

Memories of you fill me with rage. The only cleanse smudging of the red man's sage.

You were cruel watching my spirit burn from the flames of hell.

Your face filled with maniacal emotion knowing these tribulations apart of your spell.

The soul's you've tormented collectively gather a congregation.

Luring good natured men to ruin with a subtle invitation.

Leaving them lay awake at night.

While you are out dancing past the stroke of midnight.

Fraternizing and fornicating with the Afro-Italian like two animals in the wild.

Gate keeping new of your enceinte, you suddenly vanish and hide his child.

Repeat Chorus

Verse 3

Even God doesn't know what to do with you.

His own creation lacks any empathy and virtue.

Behind the concealer, and eye shadow your a fury a dog faced woman from hell.

I have only myself to blame for 10 years of you playing me like a puppet on a string.

Your company is a streak of Friday the 13th with no good fortune to bring.

ELO once said there's an open road that leads no where.

So just make some miles between you and there.

Poisonous red wine you poured it fucked me up.

The tables have turned it's your turn to drink it all up.

Bridge

Remember Lady Karma never loses a address.

When she arrives she will hold up a mirror of all that you refuse to confess.

While you are dancing at the Roosevelt Room.

Lady Karma in her five inch red heels coming to serve you deserved doom.

Me necromanced from the dead thanks to the hands of father time.

Cheating Jezebel's antics a protection spell and it's perfected rhymes.

(Instrumentals for 2 min, and pre-chorus line.)

(Yi-yi-yi-ay-ye- heyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

King Ahab your equal as a scorned lover

The holy book kept score of your sins things that can't be kept under cover.

A unsub missive succubus on a full moon sizzling night of summer the jasmines in bloom.

(A evil woman laugh inserted)

Not a nice lady (In a mocking dramatic tone)

#evil woman #jezebel #hell #cursed #sucubbus #songwriter #songwriting #emotions

[duckugou]

golden

Kenma x GN!reader

Im trying to stray away from my comfort zone of just writing readers that use she/her so bear with me

sorry if this lowkey sucks but it was inspired by harry styles song golden

cw: big cursing, huge fluff, strangers to friends to lovers, comfort, aged up!

come to my asks to be a part of my taglist! just let me know what kinds of fics/ what fandom/ what characters/ etc you want to be tagged in!

Requests are open!!

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Being a streamer comes with perks. Being comfy at home, not having to face people in real life every day, playing games, typical shit. Another perk is making good friends.

Meeting people on a voice chat is common for Kenma -guys and gals alike. What he wasnt expecting one night was the sweetest voice on the other end of his headphones.

"You're all fucks- I'm better at this game than all of you combined. Try me."

To think that was the sentence that made Kenma's ears perk up and burn.

"What the hell ever- we have the great Kodzuken on our side." One of the guys said, half joking half dead serious.

"Oh yeah, he isn't even speaking up to defend your pussy asses- probably knows I could beat him too." You could hear the smirk in that last part.

"U-uh, no. You can't beat me. Nobody can actually. Not at this game." Kenma rebutted , confident in his gaming skills but not so much his speaking skills to this stranger.

"Oh man, you certainly sound confident. Come on, Kodzuken- 1v1 me then. Show me who the best really is."

Kenma suddenly felt nervous. Should he really demolish this stranger? Isn't it polite to let the person you like win? He didn't like this person yet but god their voice was attractive.

"Fine. Send the request." He decided.

"Sent, fucker."

The game resulted in a tie because this stranger actually knew what they were doing. They both threw friendly insults at each other the whole time of course, making each of them laugh a little.

"Okay fine. The great Kodzuken himself almost beat me. Im almost honored to have a great streamer almost beat me."

"Well you almost beat me too- uh-" Kenma stuttered over the fact that he didn't know how to address this stranger.

"Oh! Call me Y/n." The person giggled.

"You can uh, call me Kenma."

"Oh you don't want me to repeat your title over and over like everyone else?" They laughed.

"No, friends don't call me that. They use my name name." His ears were burning.

"Friends, huh? Guess that means you owe me your number so we can schedule a rematch where I can properly beat your ass."

"Huh, guess so."

A few months had gone by and Y/n and Kenma were as close as they could be. They found out they live close by each other and began hanging out a lot.

Y/n would be in the back of his streams on occasion and wouldn't hesitate to speak up during them. Thats the thing about Y/n. They've always been so outspoken. Since the start. Everything they talk about comes so easy to Y/n. Nothing is held back. Kenma knows everything about them. He on the other hand is still a bit closed off. Quiet. The two are so opposite yet so alike. Kenma doesn't speak much about himself, opting to listen.

Especially when talking about past relationships.

One night, they were sat in Kenmas room in separate chairs, letting conversations flow.

"So, you've dated but why have the relationships ended?" Y/n asked.

"Ah, I dont know- its not important. Why did yours end?" Kenma flipped the question as he always does.

"One guy cheated," Y/n tossed a piece of popcorn in the air, missing their mouth and brushing it off. "One girl left because she was leaving for school, and one guy just didn't mesh with me. Your turn." Y/n pushed the question back.

"Uh- well. I don't click with people easily. I'm pretty closed off so when I date it usually ends in hurt feelings by accident or they get sick of me." Kenma finally admitted.

"Huh." Y/n flopped onto their stomach on the bed after setting down the popcorn. "Don't you like anyone though? Like- if you liked someone enough, do you think you would give opening up a shot?"

"I mean I guess. Nobody ever takes the time to...pry me open." That got a laugh out of Y/n. Good. "But yeah I do like someone."

Sitting up suddenly, Y/n became visibly excited.

"TELL ME WHO."

"No god no- it isnt important." Kenmas ears burned again.

"Come onnnnn. Its gotta be someone big time cool to earn your heart. I have to approve."

Y/n pulled Kenma from his chair to the bed, not letting go of his hand as he sat down.

"Theyre very cool- and very sweet. Understanding. Someone who stands up for me and makes me comfortable-" Kenma began gushing.

"Do I know them?" Y/n interrupted.

"Y-yeah. You sure do." Kenma scratched the back of his neck.

"Oooh ok, a guessing game. Describe them more- their looks!" Y/n held his hand tighter, bouncing up and down with excitement.

"Well- ok." Kenma took a deep breath and decided he could be vague enough. "Theyre short. As short if not shorter than me. Competitive. Very cute smile-"

"TOO VAGUE give me the JUICY DETAILS" Y/n pushed.

"They uh- they have..pretty eyes." He was staring at this point, eyes wandering around Y/ns face to find more things to describe. "cute nose too I guess. Squishy cheeks. Glasse-"

"WHO THE HELL IS IT KENMA- its starting to sound like youre describing me." Y/n laughed.

"No- I'm totally not!" Kenma rushed.

"Tell this person you like them. You look so happy when you talk about them. Its kind of sickening."

"I can't just do that." Kenma stated flatly.

"Yeah you can."

"No-"

"DO ITTTT. Nothing to be scared of- it's CUTE. They would be dumb to not like you."

Kenma sighed, knowing he couldn't tell Y/n the truth about who he liked. What does he usually do when he's put in a corner like this? Oh thats right-

"Who do you like then Y/n?" He asked, proud of himself for deflecting again.

"Oh thats easy. You." Y/n said, letting go of his hand and laying back on the bed, leaving Kenma sitting up and stunned.

"What? No I mean a crush idiot. Who do you liiikkkeee?" Kenma pushed, hoping he didn't hear Y/n wrong.

"You, Kenma. I've had a crush since our first tie in a game. Thought that was obvious-"

Kenma flopped back on the bed as well. The both of them looking at each other.

"Oh. My person is uh... really... open and honest." Kenma said quietly.

"Is that why you wont tell them?" Y/n asked just as hushed.

"Yeah... what if right now they say yes but then their feelings change one day? That would hurt so bad. Worse than not telling them ever." He whispered.

There was silence. They knew what they both just admitted. Kenmas heart started racing. This might've fucked everything up. He might lose them. But they like him too so why is he so scared?

Y/n held his hand again.

"I know that youre scared because I'm so open...but hey... If you wanna give it a try..." Y/n whispered, scared about whether or not their honesty fucked them over.

"You might be right this time Y/n." Kenma whispered.

The space between them was closed due to both of them being drawn together like magnets in that moment. A sweet kiss.

"Let's try it then. I'll work on... being more open if you'd like." Kenma said.

"Kenma. I dont want you to change one bit. I like you the way you are."

Acceptance. It was the best thing Kenma has ever felt.

#kenma #kenma fic #kenma fluff #kenma gamer #haikyuu fic #haikyuu x reader #kenma x reader #haikyuu fluff #harry styles golden lyric AHHHH

[wastelandnarry]

Georgia - hes

summary: He never should of told her, never should’ve let her see inside at what was troubling his mind. Now he’s singing Georgia on his mind. 

author’s notes: inspired by Georgia - Vance Joy. I have wanted to write something with this song for the longest time and I thought it matched a Harry scenario perfectly! I hope you guys enjoy!

warnings: mentions of drinking, mentions of food, breakup, angst. 

masterlist || request ||  join my taglist

Harry watched her from the window as she walked through the crowd. His eyes had caught hers once or twice during the night already and he was convinced that he'd lose his mind if it happened again. The party had been a distraction for him, a way to get his mind off of the stress of his upcoming film and maybe even just to let loose for the first time in months. He'd been nursing the drink in his hand, the soft pink liquid in the glass swirling with whatever edible glitter that had been added in. If he was being honest, he'd only grabbed the drink after having watched her grab one for herself and smile to herself when she took a sip. She was electric, the people around her hanging onto every word that left her, something Harry watched from a distance, hoping that eventually the courage would kick in and he'd be able to walk over to her.

She was, after all, his ex-girlfriend. 

Georgia had come into Harry's life all at once and he wasn't too sure how he'd managed to convince her to date him. She was kind and bold, always knowing when to reassure him on the days when his confidence was low. She was giving and had a laugh that Harry could listen to on repeat if it was ever possible. Georgia was something to behold and Harry had somehow managed to be loved by her. Their whirlwind of a relationship had started one night after they'd run into each other for the fifth time at the coffee shop near Harry's studio. He'd been up for an ungodly amount of hours and needed a caffeine kick. He was convinced that he looked more like a mummy than an actual human and just his luck, Georgia had been sitting in her usual seat. 

She'd been typing away on her laptop with the steaming mug of a vanilla latte, the one Harry learned she always got, cooling off next to her. Her eyes had been focused on the screen in front of her, eyebrows furrowed in concentration as Harry thanked his luck that she hadn't spotted how out of it he looked that day. That was until the barista called his name out and her eyes shot up, meeting his in the loud and bustling shop. Her kind smile, the one that Harry would remember long after their occasional run-in, had left Harry breathless as he rushed over to grab his drink. 

"Early morning?" her voice, which Harry decided was the best thing he'd heard all morning, said as she walked past him when she walked past him to throw away the banana peel she'd been holding onto, "You don't usually pop in until much later."

"Oh, so you've noticed me?" Harry asked and chuckled, trying his best to mask his embarrassment as he pulled down the hoodie that had been covering the unruly curls on his head. 

"Hard not to, considering everyone in this place goes quiet the second you walk in here. Which I should thank you for, gives me a moment of peace and clarity," she nodded and chuckled, "Georgia, it's nice to meet you,"

"Harry,"

"Yeah, I assumed."

Waking up most days, the sun was barely peeking out behind the clouds and Harry had always felt the pull his bed gave him. If he didn't rub his eyes and stretched out his back, he could almost hear the mattress whispering, "come back to bed, Harry," which was all he wanted to do. But he was an adult and his latest movie project had called for some very early morning call times. So there Harry was, waking up before the sun even made it's presence known to the world, sliding on some comfy joggers and his favorite hoodie to shield him from the morning cold. 

"Bub," Georgia's tired voice whined out from his bed, "Too early, don't go."

"I'm sorry, bug, I've got to head out soon, shooting early today and tomorrow," Harry sighed, looking over at the lump in the blankets that was his girlfriend, "Go back to bed, yeah?"

"Wanna kiss," she yawned and peeked out from the blankets, her tired eyes meeting Harry's in the dim-lit room. 

Harry smiled, his feet padding against the wood floors as he made his way over to her side of the bed. Harry had asked her if she'd wanted to move in a few weeks before, which had resulted in Harry's place being filled with pieces of her and him mixed in with one another. His hand found a spot on her hip, rubbing a pattern onto the exposed skin as he leaned down to press a kiss onto her lips. He knew it was dangerous. The kisses shared between the two of them usually ended with moans and whimpers being let out into the room and Harry really couldn't afford to be late to filming. But Georgia's soft lips on his pulled him closer into her, and the bed, and he found himself with that same pulling feeling his mattress would give him back when he was alone. 

"Have fun today, yeah?" Georgia breathed out, her forehead resting against Harry's as they both took in one last moment together. 

The drive to the set, which was usually when Harry drove in silence and tried to get into character, was filled with soft music. Harry's fingers tapped against the steering wheel as he hummed along to the playlist his phone had been playing for the past couple of weeks, a mix of his favorites, Georgia's favorites, and songs that reminded them of one another. Harry had been stopped at a red light when a song he'd picked for the playlist started playing, his smile growing as he heard the opening strums of the guitar. 

"...I could easily lose my mind, the way you kiss me will work each time, calling me to come back to bed singing Georgia on my mind..."

Walking back through the front door, something Harry had done more times than he could count, after his tiring day at the studio, he hadn't expected to be met with Georgia dancing around the living room. Music floated through the house; one of Georgia's favorite things about his place, which she'd told him late one night in bed, was how great the acoustics were and how the music just sounded better. Harry watched as her she danced along to the beat of her favorite song, one which had been on repeat for the past two weeks. His heart swelled and his tired body seemed to spring to life as he watched Georgia turn and face him, her eyes wide and filled with innocence at behind caught lost in a moment.

“Harry!” she said excitedly and rushed over to pull him into a tight hug, one that Harry happily returned, “How was it?”

“Was okay, darling, not as entertaining as that dance though,” he teased, his lips finding her forehead, “What a nice show to walk into.”

“Ha. Ha. Very funny,” she mumbled and rolled her eyes, “Are you hungry?”

“Starving.”

Dinner has been filling, the wine shared between Harry and Georgia making them both warm and fuzzy. They’d cleaned up, humming along to the song that was playing from the living room, and before they knew it they were both laying on the couch taking one another in. Harry had found comfort between Georgia’s thighs, his body slotting in between hers as if they were made to be, his lips exploring the softness of her own. Harry could’ve kissed her for the rest of his life if he tried, he might’ve already been doing that. He always seemed to lose track of time whenever Georgia was in his arms and her lips were on his. The wine certainly hadn’t helped, their movements clumsy and slow as the took each other in and explored their bodies together. It wasn’t until he felt Georgia’s hips push up against his, both of them letting out a groan, that he slowly pulled away. His eyes opened to find a view that had been so heavenly to him in the past couple of months since their relationship had started.

“What is it…?” Georgia asked, her chest rising and falling with the panty breathes she was taking.

“You just…you’re breathtaking,” he whispered, his hand coming up to cup the side of her face, “I don’t deserve your love,” he mumbled.

Underneath him, Georgia was the definition of breathtaking. Her eyes were wide and her pupils dilated, taking over him and leaving Harry with goosebumps on his skin, almost as if she was touching him all over and yet not at all. Her lips, which Harry has been attacking not too long ago, were plush and pink, a sheen of their shared spit still covering them. Her hair had been tousled and no longer framed her face while she laid on the couch, it was poking out in different directions and she might’ve called it horrendous at that angle but Harry loved it. He loved everything about Georgia, she was the one who could make him lose his mind.

“Oh please,” Georgia laughed and shook her head, turning to press a soft kiss into Harry’s palm, “I could never and would never want to love anyone else, Harry.”

“Yeah?” he whispered, fear flashing across his face for just a second before it was gone without a trace at the feel of Georgia’s lips on his again, “I love you, bug.”

“I love you more.”

Georgia was leaving. Her business trip would take her away for almost a week, leaving Harry with a pain in his chest that wouldn’t go away no matter how hard he’d try to push it. He walked her through the train station, holding her bag tightly in his hand as they strolled hand in hand towards the platform. Harry’s heart raced as he felt her lips on his for the last time in a while, his throat aching as he watched her board the train and walked out of view until she found a seat near the window where she could wave goodbye. He wasn’t used to this, being the one who would wave off their lover, he was always the one who was leaving. But as the train screeched and sped off, leaving Harry alone on the platform staring at the brick wall ahead of him, he couldn’t believe Georgia had done this for him countless times.

He’s gone back home alone, the passenger seat next to him feeling cold and he found himself pouting when his hand was met with the feel of leather instead of the softness of Georgia’s thigh. He’d stayed by the phone most of the evening, watching for any updates that she might send on her journey to a city far away from Harry. He had no idea how she did this every time Harry had to leave for a tour or for a movie project, she’d only been gone for a few hours and he’d found himself walking aimlessly around the house, waiting for a sign that she was okay. It was horrible, the waiting and the anxiousness that came with it all.

By the fourth day, Harry had realized just how much he’d taken Georgia for granted. He missed her like crazy. He missed the way she always curled up next to him in bed, how her hand always found his in the middle of the night and gave it a squeeze to show him she was still there beside him. He missed her soft voice and how it sounded while she was on a work call and Harry was in his office or reading through a script. He missed the way her arms would wrap around him and how she would hide her face in his chest, leaving kisses on his skin until he laughed and peppered her skin with kisses. By the fourth day of Georgia being gone, he realized just how hard it must’ve been to be with him.

On the fifth day, Harry had called her after one too many drinks and told her how he felt. His slurred voice rambled on about how he never realized how unfair he has been to her and how she deserved a better relationship. He told her all about how he’d felt since she been gone and how he couldn’t imagine feeling like this every other month. He’d rambled on for minutes on end, his drunken truths interrupted only by the sniffles he’d get caught up in before returning to his original point. The one that Georgia had been trying to figure out for the past hours since he’s hung up the phone. The one that had left her in her hotel room, wiping away the tears Harry had brought on.

“I’m not good enough for you,” he’d choked out, “I leave and disappear for weeks on end and you just…you just wait for me to get back. Do you wait with the same hole in your chest that I have? Because I’d never wish this on anyone, bug, it’s horrendous.”

It had all happened too fast, the rambling and the tears and hit Georgia’s ears before she even had time to think of a response. It felt like seconds had passed since she’s answered the call, excited to tell Harry all about her advent ours day in a city she’d never been to, only to have her heartbroken. Then, as if some cruel joke was being played on her, time slowed down. Every ring to Harry’s dragged on and on until his voicemail message was heard and the line went dead. She’d spent the rest of her night listening to the droning sound, hoping that eventually Harry would answer and she could calm him down, show him the truth, and tell him that she loved him. But the phone was never picked up and the pit in Georgia’s stomach was filled with anxiety.

Arriving back at the platform where she had last seen Harry, her eyes searched the massive crowd of people, her nerves rose as she walked out of the station alone. Her cab ride back home had been silent, her fingers playing with the necklace around her neck nervously as she watched the familiar streets pass by her window, hoping that when she got home she’d be met with the sight of her lover. It had been two days since the call with Harry. Two days since she’d heard from him or even got a text back from him. She was used to the silence, it was something that happened sometimes when Harry’s job became bust and chaotic and he lost himself in it all. But this time around things were different and Harry had been promised at least a couple of weeks off to relax and regain who he was. He was meant to be at home with the people he loved.

Georgia was met with an empty house, the sound of her bag hitting the floor echoing throughout the large rooms. She’d walked through the whole place, calling our Harry’s name only to be met with more silence. It wasn’t until she walked into the bedroom and saw the small card on her pillow that the fear in her truly rose. She must’ve sat on the bed and read through the damn note a thousand times, her body too in shock to move and too anxious to accept that he was gone.

“It’s better this way, bug. You deserve someone who can truly love you the way you are meant to be loved. All I do is cause you pain, I’m barely here for you and I couldn’t even handle less than a week without you. I’m sorry, I wish things could’ve ended differently. I will always have you on my mind, Georgia. Love Always, Harry.”

Harry’s voicemail message, one Georgia had gotten to memorize by the number of times she’d had to listen to it, hit her hears again. Her hands curled around the note, wrinkling it and ripping the paper on one side. Her tears streamed down her cheeks as she tried to steady her voice, her mind running a million miles an hour as she tried her best to keep down a sob.

“You left…y-you just left and didn’t even say goodbye to me. You didn’t even give me a good reason, Harry.” she sniffed, her eyes looking around the room that was filled with them both, “I knew what I was getting myself into when we started this. I knew it wasn’t going to be easy and there would be times where I wouldn’t see you for weeks on end. But I also knew that you were everything I wanted.”

Georgia had been warned about Harry when they first started seeing each other. She was told all the rumors about him and plenty of people had tried to scare her away from him and his world. But she knew there was more to him than just a pop star sensation, more to him than the act he put on both off-screen and on. He was kind and gentle and so caring. He was ambitious and inspirational, always wanting the best for himself and those he surrounded himself with. Harry was nothing like what the media portrayed and that had made Georgia fight for them to work.

“I know what your job is like, I knew from the beginning and I stayed, Harry. I stayed because I love you and I want you more than anything I’ve ever wanted,” she whispered and wiped her nose on the sleeve of her sweater, “So please just…just call me back and we can fix this, yeah? I love you,” she sighed and hesitated for a few seconds before hanging up.

Harry, from his hotel room just a few blocks away, listened to the voicemail for hours before his eyes finally closed and he drifted off to sleep.

And then she ran into her at that damn party.

In the short span of the party, Harry had somehow managed to grab her attention and after another sip of the pink drink, they both found themselves walking off to the garden. She’d walked out first, her eyes meeting his while she passed by, almost as if giving Harry a sign to follow her. He’d taken one last sip of his drink, setting the cup down before he followed after her. She looked beautiful in the soft light of the garden, but then again, she always looked beautiful. It wasn’t until Harry’s eyes met hers, which were dull in comparison to the usual emotions they’d held before, that he realized just how much he had missed her presence.

“How have you been?” Harry asked, breaking the silence between them and instantly hating how her shoulders and jaw tensed, “I…I’m sorry about…”

“About leaving me with just a note and a shitty explanation?” Georgia asked, her eyes staring into Harry’s with a new emotion, anger.

“Georgia I…” Harry started, the lump in his throat growing as she shook her head and sighed.

“No, you had your chance to talk,” she frowned, “You has your chance to talk and call or even just text me, and did you? No! All you did was ignore me for four months and now you won’t stop staring at me at this party and it’s just…”

“I love you,” he blurted out, his eyes wide as he waited for her reaction, “I know I messed up but I love you and I haven’t stopped loving you since you spilled chocolate syrup on me during our first sleepover.”

“You can’t just show up after months and expect me to forgive you. You broke my heart, Harry! You left me and I couldn’t even stop you,” she whispered shakily, her eyes meeting his in the moonlight, “I just…I miss you so much and I should hate you. I should hate your guys but I just can’t.”

They talked more after that, both of them too tired from the stress and heartbreak of the past months to put up much of a fight. They talked until the moon was disappearing on the horizon and the music behind them both dimmed until it was just Harry and Georgia's voice floating up into the sky. They talked about everything, the insecurities they’d both had, the challenging parts of their relationship, and even the terrifying parts. They both moved closer to one another as the night went on, leaning into the warmth they both gave off until they had said everything they needed to say.

“Please just…can we try again?” Harry whispered as his hand found Georgia’s, his eyes meeting hers with a pleasing look, “I want to work this out with you, I want us to work.”

“I never wanted you to leave in the first place, Harry,” Georgia whispered, her forehead leaning against his as they both felt a pressure lift off their shoulders. Both finally feeling a little more like themselves for the first time in months.

Harry's personal life changed a lot after that party. He continued to throw himself into his work, leaving his studio from late nights recording and rushing on to the set of his latest movie project. Starring in movies had always been a dream for Harry, he got to immerse himself into a world and a life he'd never lived. It was so surreal whenever he walked on stage in his costume, it all felt like a dream. But his latest dreams in life include a certain someone by his side. They included Georgia, whose warmth and kindness brought Harry a bigger thrill than any of his projects ever could. The months apart had left both of them searching for one another in an ocean of regrets and words unspoken until that night at the party.

It was hard work, especially when he was writing and recording in whatever spare time he had on days after he was done filming, making time for his relationship with the love of his life was something he’d never take for granted again. He’d move planets for Georgia and he knew that she’d do the same for him. And maybe, just maybe, the ring that had been hiding in Harry’s bag would make an appearance in the coming months, to show his lover that he would always sing with Georgia on his mind.

taglist: @hrrypinks​ @matchacal

#harry styles x oc #harry styles x reader #harry styles x you #harry styles imagines #harry styles fic #harry styles blurbs #harry styles #gemma writes

[dazedbydazai]

예뻤어 - You Were Beautiful

➤ Pairing: Dazai Osamu x Fem!Reader

➤ Genre: Angst

➤ Warning: Character death(s)

➤ WC: 2.0K

(A/N: This was requested by an anon and was inspired by DAY6′s song, You were Beautiful. I suggest listening to that while reading this. It just hits right.)

Dazai Osamu was a very secretive and elusive man. He had multiple tricks up his sleeve, he was manipulative, cunning, and unforgiving. He didn't know what love was, he abandoned that emotion long ago. He was merciless and self-centered, only caring about things that will benefit him. Dazai Osamu was not a good man.

But all of that changed when his closest friend, Odasaku, died.

Promising to turn over a new leaf, Dazai left the Port Mafia in pursuit of something more beautiful, something good, and he had also vowed to not let anyone else enter his life and be attached to them in fear of losing them like he lost his friend.

Dazai vowed. He closed himself off, hiding behind a pretentious and flamboyant character that fools people with his handsome smile and witty banter. Dazai didn't want to repeat the same mistake twice. Dazai had already learned.

He chanted this in his mind over and over again but alas, he was not able to stick to his word. Because just after a few months of leaving his past self behind, he suddenly met you.

A beautiful woman. Funny, kind, and just as intelligent as Dazai, you showed up in front of him like an angel and broke down all the walls he's built.

Dazai didn't understand why, of all people, did you come to him? Why waste your time on someone who's suicidal and clearly not of sound mind? Why bother entertaining his antics and flirtatious behavior when you knew that he only did this to cover up his ugliness within?

Simple. The answer was simple.

It was just in your nature.

You were gentle when you first embraced Dazai. You were understanding when he told you about his past. You were soft spoken when you told him that it's okay. You were kind, so very kind, that Dazai didn't bother to put up his walls around you anymore.

Dazai let himself fall. He wanted to hold you in his arms longer, wanted you to kiss his pain and anguish away, he wanted to love you. And he did.

That promise he made himself was long forgotten as he sighed contently, letting your fingers drag through his hair, gently fixing it up.

"Dazai? Are you falling asleep?" You giggle as you look at him through the mirror of your dresser.

Dazai blinked a few times before grinning at you. "Hmm... if I say yes, would you let me sleep in your bed tonight?"

You lightly smack his forehead and laugh. "If you meant that literally, then go ahead."

You were always so welcoming with Dazai, no, actually with all the people you meet. You treat them equally, always talking to them with a smile on your face. But Dazai likes to think that he's given special treatment from you. You are, after all, the closest person he's ever let in his life next to Odasaku.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Being with you was easy. You calmed Dazai's heart, relaxed his mind, made him feel more human.

"You are the most beautiful person I've ever met," He had told you one day as you ate your lunch together. If it was anybody else, they'd assume that Dazai was just being his usual flirty self. But since it was you, you knew that those words held something deeper as you look in his brown orbs.

Being with Dazai was difficult, to say the least, but you kept up with him, determined to help him in any way you can. And it wasn't long before you found yourself falling for him too.

It was in the gentle way he held your hand, the glint in his eyes whenever he talks to you, the softness and vulnerability of his voice when he lets out his inner thoughts and nightmares.

You were always there, listening through each and every one of his stories. Even when he had called you up at three o'clock in the morning, voice hoarse and shaky as he apologized to you.

"Did you have another nightmare?" You ask softly and when Dazai says yes, you sit up on your bed and walk him through it. You always knew how to calm him down, knew the right words to say, and Dazai was thankful for that.

Dazai truly loved you and you loved him too.

That's why even if he knows he won't be able to hold you in his arms forever, he still takes the chance and asks you to be his.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

It feels like heaven. Dazai thought as he held you in his arms one cold winter night.

It was perfect. How your hand fit in his as he kissed your knuckles gently.

"You are so beautiful, my belladonna."

Those words never failed to make you blush, your heart skipping a beat as Dazai traces the features of your face with his finger.

"Stay with me like this forever, Dazai. I want to keep you close to me for as long as I can," You whisper these words as you close your eyes, feeling sleepy.

"Don't say that like you're going someplace else, my love. I will forever be by your side," Dazai replied as he kissed your forehead and wrapped the blanket closer to your bodies.

But maybe Dazai should have taken your words more seriously that night. Because a few weeks later, he will find himself regretting not holding onto you tighter.

Life was cruel, Dazai knew that from a young age. Things never go according to plan. One moment you're up in the clouds, and the next you're falling head first to the ground.

That's how Dazai felt today as he got a call from the hospital.

Leaving behind his work at the agency and rushing over to you in a panic, Dazai felt his world slowly crumble to pieces as he saw the state you were in.

"What happened?" Dazai asked the doctor as he stood still at the doorway of your room. Dazai's eyes were blank as he listened to the doctor explaining that you suddenly fainted in the middle of the street. That it was probably due to the strain in your heart, a terminal illness that Dazai had no idea you had.

But maybe he already knew. He saw you multiple times trying to take some medicine in secret, as if you were afraid of letting Dazai see. At one time he found a bottle of pills in your cabinet but he didn't dare ask what it was for.

It was silly, how you two were so alike, how you also masked your own pain by that beautiful smile of yours.

When the doctor had finished and left, Dazai approached your bed and sat by your side. Even with your eyes closed and your lips not the usual shade of pink, Dazai still found you beautiful and he simply stared at you, waiting for you to wake up.

When you come to, the first thing you see is the familiar tousle of Dazai’s hair as he laid his head on your hospital bed. You felt your words get caught up in your throat and your hand flinch.

“Belladonna?” Dazai called out groggily, having woken up by your movement.

Immediately, as you lock eyes with him, you felt your tears forming and falling at the corner of your eyes.

“I’m sorry,” Was all you could say as you cried. You felt horrible, both physically and emotionally. All this time you had kept this a secret from him, from someone who has been so honest with you from the start. You apologized over and over again, not knowing what else to say.

Dazai hushed you by wiping your tears away. “What are you sorry for, my belladonna?”

You force the lump down your throat as you look up at the ceiling, suddenly unable to face Dazai head on.

“For everything,” You whisper. “I know I should have told you about this. But I just…”

Dazai waited for you to continue, staying silent as he brushed his thumb across your cheeks.

You shut your eyes and cry harder, your body shaking horribly. “I didn’t want to worry you, didn’t want you to see me like this. I look and feel so helpless.”

You clutch the sheets in your hands and take a shaky breath. “All my life they told me to just stay still, to not venture out in the world. I know I don’t have long to live and I planned to listen to them and close myself off. But that was until I met you.”

You find the courage to finally face Dazai again and your heart sank deeper as you see the blank look in his eyes. “I became selfish. Ever since I met you, I suddenly wanted to live. I wanted to experience everything life had to offer. I wanted to fall in love, and I’m so glad that I found that in you. And I don’t regret leaving my past behind and meeting you. But…”

You reach up and hold Dazai’s cheek and that’s when you saw the familiar pain cross his eyes. “The only regret that I have now is that I put you in this position once again.”

Dazai knew what you meant and he couldn’t help the deep sigh that escapes his lips. Closing his eyes, he leans into your touch and says, “Can’t you stay with me for a little longer, Y/N?”

It was the first time in a long while that he called you by your name and it hurt so bad how sad his tone was when saying it.

“I honestly don’t know Dazai,” You admit you aren’t sure how longer you can stay with him, how longer you can live. And as you helplessly lay on the bed and hold Dazai’s hand in yours tightly, you couldn’t help but pray to all the gods to give you a little bit more time.

Life was indeed cruel and it left a bitter taste in Dazai’s mouth as he stared out the window of your shared apartment. There were a lot of things left unsaid between you two but one thing was for certain, you really didn’t want Dazai to see the pain you were hiding inside.

You only wanted him to see the good things, the beautiful things. Wanted him to enjoy life and continue on his journey. But how was he supposed to do that now? He wanted to be angry, wanted to scream at the universe for kicking him down like this over and over again, but he can’t bring himself to. He couldn’t hate you. No. Not you.

Because you were beautiful.

From the moment he first saw you, he knew how gorgeous you were from inside and out.

You were beautiful.

Every time you said you loved him with that sparkle in your eyes. Every time you called his name in that sweet voice of yours. Every time you kissed and wrapped your arms around him.

You were beautiful.

Even as you saw all the ugliness of life, you still managed to smile.

You were beautiful.

Even as you said you were sorry, with tears staining your cheeks.

You were beautiful.

Even as you said your final good bye when you thought Dazai was sound asleep by your side.

Everything about you was beautiful, and deep down, Dazai was glad he found you. He was thankful that you guided him to the light. He was happy he got to spend a significant time with you.

But no matter how beautiful your time spent with him was, he still couldn’t help but clench his fist in anger. Why did you have to leave me too?

It was a question Dazai always asked but he never found an answer. Again, for the second time in his life, someone so dear slipped away from his hands.

Sometimes he wanted to end it as well, to fall into the hands of death. But he was suddenly afraid to push through it. He was afraid to forget you, to never see you again even as he closes his eyes. He was scared to lose his precious memories of you.

Because all of it was beautiful in his eyes.

And now as he lays in bed, he doesn’t know what hurts and haunts him more; the nightmares of his past life, or the constant dreams he has of you and your beautiful smile.

#bungou stray dogs #bungou stray dogs angst #bungou stray dogs x reader #bungo stray dogs #bungo stray dogs angst #bungo stray dogs x reader #bsd x reader #bsd #bsd angst #bsd dazai #dazai osamu #dazai x reader #bsd dazai angst

[moshymosh]

Remember me: A Night To Remember (2)

When the love of your life suffers from a disease that affects their memory of their life with you, what do you do? Will you spend your last days with them, trying to get them to remember you? The life you had, or would you give up and let them forget you?

Summary- Dr. Spencer Reid felt his whole life change when Agent Y/n L/n joined the BAU. She came in like a cool summer breeze changing everything Spencer knew about love and his capacity to care for someone so much. Y/n came to the BAU with a tragic past, her only goal was to save lives and make the world a safer place for everyone. She meets a skinny shaggy haired doctor, which causes her whole life to change, much like Spencer, will she fall in love or will her tragic past or even her job prevent her?

Pairings- Dr. Spencer Reid x f!reader.

A/N- This is a notebook inspired story, this story will be told and wrote like a chapter book. So some of the endings will not always make sense. Also I don't claim go own Criminal Minds or the Notebook, this is solely for entertainment purposes and for enjoyment. Some of the lines are from the notebook movie, again I don't claim to own either fandom/tv show/ movie. I try to make Y/n as vague as possible so shes more inclusive so if there is any descriptive things that don’t apply to you feel free to ignore them. Also just putting this out there as the story progresses Maeve is still alive and well, she is a good friend of Spencer and Y/n’s. There will be graphic content and sexual scenes in later chapters, warnings will be added as they go. Also if you want to be tagged send me an as or comment here, also send requests I'm down for making little fics.

Here is the board I've been using for inspo here

PS- Please don't post my fics anywhere without my documented consent, thanks -Karma (MoshyMosh)

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Spencer looked at his reflection in the mirror of the fitting room as he adjusted the sleeves of the suit jacket he was trying on, he sighed and stepped out of the small room into the sight of his coworkers.

“Do I look ok?” he asked his friends nervously

“Lose the gray shirt, go for white.” Derek said, looking up from his phone to Spencer. “Garcia just sent me a picture of the tie they got you that matches Y/n’s dress.” Derek said as he passed his phone to Rossi, sitting beside him.

“Yeah, white will look best.” The Italian agent said, looking up from the picture on Derek’s phone. “JJ has your tie, Spencer. She said she will bring it by later today, or in the morning it seems.” he said with a chuckle as he handed Derek his phone back.

“Looks like they're breaking out the wine.” Derek said, chucking at the picture of Penelope holding up two bottles of wine in Y/n’s living room.

“Good Italian wine they're having too.” Rossi remarked, smirking.

Derek looked back up at Spencer, “get the tux but with a white shirt.” he told him.

Spencer turned around to look at his reflection again and nodded his head in acceptance of the suit before he turned and told the employee nearby what he wanted. When the employee went to look for his shirt, Spencer went back inside the fitting room to change back.

Spencer handed the suit he neatly hung back on the hanger to the employee and followed his friends up to the registers to pay for his items. As he let Derek drive him back to his apartment he began to think about Y/n and if she really liked him or only saw him as a friend and coworker. Spencer then wondered if she was having fun with the girls.

“Why are you so quiet pretty boy?” Derek asked as he glanced from the road to Spencer then back to the road.

“Just thinking.” Spencer said looking from the window to Derek.

“About Y/n?” Derek asked softly, looking over to see Spencer nodding his head as he looked out the window again. Derek looked back to the road before he spoke. “Don't overthink your feelings or hers, it won't end well if you do.”

Spencer and Derek sat in silence the rest of the way to Spencer's apartment, once Spencer began to climb out of the car Derek spoke again.

“Keep giving her those gifts, let it come naturally.” Derek said as he watched Spencer grab his tux from the back of the car. Spencer walking into his apartment building, heading for his home as he kept repeating what Derek told him in his mind.

Y/n giggled as she sipped on her wine before she grabbed the box Emily was holding out to her. “What’s this?” she asked in confusion.

“Just open it.” Penelope said as she applied a face mask, looking into Y/n’s makeup mirror she set in Y/n’s coffee table.

Y/n shook her head with a laugh before she set her wine glass down and began to open the lid to the box. She let out a small gasp when she saw the necklace Emily showed her in the shop. “Emily... You didn’t have to do this.”

“Consider it my welcome to the team gift, that is several months overdue.” Emily said as best she could with the drying face mask on her face.

“Thank you, so much.” Y/n said before their laughter was interrupted by Y/n’s buzzer going off. “That must be the food.” Y/n said as she got up to buzz the delivery guy in. Y/n paid and brought their food back to be passed out to the girls. The rest of the night the girls laughed and cried together, just spending some time being friends.

Y/n walked into the bullpen with a groan as she felt the bright lights of the room hit her eyes. She walked over to her desk and plopped down on her chair, dropping her bag from her shoulder to the floor beside the chair.

Y/n spotted the coffee cup in her desk and grinned, looking over to Spencer. “Spencie, you are truly a Godsend.” she said as she saw him walk over to her desk, she stood and gave him a hug causing him to stand stiff.

“Uh, thank you.” Spencer said once she let him go and grabbed the coffee he got for her. She took a sip and sighed happily after.

"What are you guys doing here?" Hotch asked, walking into the bullpen in plain clothes as he looked around at the team that was in the room.

"What do you mean Hotch?" Derek asked him in confusion.

"We have the day off, I'm only here because security called me." Hotch said with a chuckle.

Y/n scoffed and shook her head, her hand reaching up to hold her head. "You're telling me I could've been at home sleeping off the wine headache?" She asked sarcastically as she reached down to pick up her bag. "Though if I did know I wouldn't have gotten my daily dose of Spencer coffee." She said as she grinned at JJ after seeing Spencer scratch the back of his neck in nervousness.

"Guys go home we have a ball tomorrow." Hotch said with a laugh, walking with everyone to the elevator. When they all began to load up in the elevator Y/n and Spencer slid to the back, standing behind everyone Y/n quietly switched the hand she was holding her coffee cup in and hooked her pinkie finger with Spencer's once she freed up her hand.

Y/n looked up at Spencer to see him smile before she leaned her head on his shoulder as they rode like the rest of the way down, only separating when the doors open to the elevator and everyone began to step out.

"Guys, let's have lunch at my place." Rossi said looking at his team. "I'll cook and from my profile of SSA L/n you seem like quite the cook."

Y/n chuckled nervously and shrugged bashfully. "I dabble but I'm down for some famous David Rossi cooking."

"Dabble? Bish please I've seen your kitchen." Penelope said, her arm hooked with Derek's as they stood around in the garage. "You're like a regular old Rachel Ray."

"That settles it. We're doing it. Everyone go home, change into more comfortable clothes and meet at my house after." Rossi called out as he walked to his car, his finger raised as he gestured to the team behind him.

Y/n watched everyone walk to their cars and begin to leave, she watched Spencer begin to walk to the exit of the garage to take public transportation back to his apartment. "Spencer!" Y/n called out to him causing him to stop and turn back around to look at her. "Let me give you a ride?" She asked him, holding her keys up.

"Uh-uh- yeah sure." Spencer said walking back over to him. "You don't have to stop at my apartment, all my clothes are like this."

Y/n smiled and nodded her head in thought. "Ok, it won't take me long to change." Y/n said as she unlocked her car and began to walk around to the driver's side door. "Come on, join me in my trusty steed." Y/n joked with a chuckle as she slid into her seat. Spencer laughed at her joke and slid into her passenger seat.

Y/n started her car and began to pull out of her parking spot then out of the fluorescent-lit garage. She started driving to her apartment, Spencer would steal glances at her as they drove, the soft sounds of Y/n singing to whatever song was on the radio, every time he looked at her a small smile would grace his lips.

"We're almost there, take a picture when you can." Y/n said with a smile, as she turned into her assigned parking space in the parking lot of her apartment complex.

"I have an eidetic memory, I physically can not forget things." Spencer said as he watched as she climbed out of her car.

Y/n laughed and leaned down to look at the man who was still sitting in the passenger seat of her car. "You coming smarty pants?" She stood up straight as she shut her door, moving to lean her hip again the hood as she waited for Spencer to get out. Y/n pressed the lock button on her key fob after he climbed out and began to walk up to her building complex.

Spencer looked around at the complex. "This is a very secure place." He noted when he looked back to watch her scan her keycard to enter into the gate that surrounded the living complexes and courtyard.

Y/n held the gate open for him and nodded as they began to walk to the building her apartment was in. "Yeah, safest one I could find when I moved here." She said softly as unlocked her door and stepped in letting him in behind.

"Why this place?" Spencer asked as he looked around at the organized chaos in her apartment. The chaos he knew from his own living space. Y/n sighed as she set her keys and bag down on the kitchen counter, Spencer looked into the kitchen and noted in his mind what Penelope was saying was true about Y/n's culinary expertise.

"I'll tell you someday." She said gesturing to her living room. "Please make yourself comfortable, I'll just be a minute." Spencer walked further into the living room as he heard her footsteps receding down the hallway to what he assumed was her bedroom.

After she changed and gather her things they were back on the road. heading to Rossi's house for the lunch he offered. The whole team had a great time at the Italian agent's house. Rossi true to his word roped Y/n into cooking with him. The time spent at his house was spent in laughter and fun. Lunch turned into dinner with Y/n being the sole cook this time and soon they were all heading home.

Spencer laid in his bed thinking about what Y/n might look like at the ball. No matter what she wore she would still look beautiful in his eyes. The night faded into the early morning dawn of the day of the ball.

The girls decided to all go to Emily's apartment to get ready for the ball. They did each other's hair and helped with their makeup. Y/n smiled at the girls as they fussed with their dresses. She looked out the window and smiled again at the soled of the setting sun. she looked back down at the mirror in front of the window and continued applying her light red lip stain.

Y/n finished her lipstick and stood, walking over her dressed that was hanging on the back of the door. "JJ help me get into this?" She asked the girl in question who was the first one dressed. She stepped into the dress and pulled it up where it belonged before she turned to let the blonde zip her up. "Girls the guys will be here any minute." She stated as she gathered her stuff.

Right as Y/n said that the doorbell to Emily's apartment buzzed signaling the rest of the team's arrival, causing Penelope and Emily to squeal in surprise. She rolled her eyes and laughed at the pair before she followed her female coworkers to the door to meet the guys downstairs to ride to the venue together.

Spencer stood outside one of the SUVs they were using for the night, watching each one of his coworkers exit the building. Spencer let out a quiet gasp when he saw Y/n, her being the last one to walk out. His eyes raked over her frame taking in every detail, knowing that it will be in his memory forever.

Y/n smiled as she stood in front of him. "Oh, I almost forgot." She said softly before she pulled out a yellow red-tipped rose that she had made into a boutonniere. "I uh- I got this for you." she said shyly as she gestured to the item in her hands.

"Thank you." Spencer said as he stepped closer to her.

"May I?" She asked as she looked up at the agent through her mascara-coated lashes.

"Uh, Yes please." Spencer said, feeling her skirt brush again his legs as she stepped closer to him. His hands instantly went to her hips, not knowing it was to keep her steady or for him to hide the shakiness of his hands. He committed the way the silky tule felt under his fingertips to his memory. Y/n focused on putting the flower in the buttonhole of his suit jacket and pinning it in place.

Spencer looked down at her hands as she straightened the accessory on his jacket. He had to suppress the whine when she stepped away, looking back to her face as it held a small smile directed at him, a blush coating her cheeks.

"Let's go love birds." Derek said with a chuckled as he and their teammates watched them. Soon everyone was loaded into the two SUVs and began driving to the location of the FBI ball.

Y/n and Spencer sat in the back seat of one of the vehicles, Spencer looked over at Y/n and watched the lights of the city flash across her face. Spencer's eyes looked down to his hand that was resting on the seat between them, her pinky finger was hooked onto his pinky and ring fingers. He smiled at the gesture and almost pouted when she pulled away as they arrived at the location.

"Let me get the door." Spencer told her as he got out of the car and rushed around to open her door. He helped her out of the car and smiled at her after he shut the door behind her. Y/n looked around before she linked her arm with his, as they began to walk up the walkway to the entrance.

The evening was spent in fun, dancing, and laughing after the awards were passed out and announcements of changes being made in the bureau were made. Soon the music slowed and Spencer asked Y/n to dance. She looked up and smiled, taking the hand he offered. He lead her to the dance floor and began to dance to the slow tune playing.

"Spencie?" Y/n asked softly, looking up from his shoulder that she was resting her head upon.

"Hmm?" He hummed out as he rested his head against hers.

"Those roses? The ones you gifted me, the coloring means friendships and or falling in love. You obviously knew that you know everything, mister four PhDs." She joked causing Spencer to chuckle and sigh in contentment. "What is your meaning behind them?" She asked softly.

"Well, we're already friends..." Spencer said softly. "Is it bad I meant them to be I am falling in love with you?"

Y/n smiled into his neck before she began to whisper. 'The poems of the privacy of the night, and of men like me. This poem dropping shy and unseen that I always carry. And that all men carry.' Y/n took a breath and pulled back to look at him.

'Love thoughts, love juice, love-odor, love yielding, love-climbers, and the climbing sap.' She continued only stopping when he started speaking.

'Arms and hands of love, lips of love, phallic thumb of love, breasts of love, bellies pressed and glued together with love.' Spencer recited from memory.

'Earth of chase love, life that is only life after love.' She recited along with him. She stopped speaking thinking that they were going to stop, she let out a soft gasp when he continued.

'The body of my love, the body of the woman I love, the body of the man, the body of the earth.' Spencer finished, as he looked into her eyes deeply. "Spontaneous me. Walt Whitman." Spencer said as he smiled softly at her.

He began to lead Y/n to the open doors that lead out to a garden, as the song finished, the garden only held a handful of people that were talking and laughing softly amongst themselves. Y/n leaned against the railing of a small gazebo he brought her to.

"You read the book of poems I gave you." She stated softly with a smile.

"I've read it and re-read it several times." He said shyly, as he rubbed the back of his neck. "And that poem I've deduced is your favorite."

"Why do you think that?" She asked, tilting her head as she looked at him, her arms coming up to rub her bare shoulders.

Spencer watched her before he took off his jacket and put it around her shoulders. "It was the fact the spine was worn and the edges of the pages were worn." He stated as he reached up to rub her arms in an effort to warm her up.

"Hey, love birds." Emily sing-songed, coming up to the pair, slightly tipsy. "Time to go or you'll be riding in a yellow chariot."

Spencer laughed and gestured for Y/n to lead the way, she smiled and began to follow the tipsy Emily to the SUVs. Y/n silently reached back for his hand, he saw this and reached for hers as well, smiling as she used one of her fingers to grip his. Spencer made a mental note to as her why she does this.

Spencer rode with her till she was dropped off at her apartment, even though it was in the opposite direction of his own. He walked her up to her door, making sure that she got home and inside safely before he let the driver take him back to his apartment. He saved the rose she gave him, much like she did with the ones he got her.

They both fell asleep in their beds, each of their thoughts thinking of the other as they drifted off.

#karmawrites #moshymosh's masterlist #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds imagine smut #mgg x reader #criminal minds smut #remember me #moshymosh writes #spencer reid x reader smut #spencer reid x reader #mgg x y/n #reader insert #Karma's imagines

[jonahlovescoffee]

Night Changes | J.M.

a/n this fanfic is inspired by one direction’s hit song with the same title. u can also listen to jonah’s cover of the same song here.This is the first complete fanfic I’ve ever written in my entire pathetic life and it has been rotting away in my files app for a while now lol u can see how insecure i was (and am) to put this out here but here it is anyways :’) any constructive criticism is appreciated <3 happy reading!!

summary: the death of his friend’s girlfriend made Jonah realize that nothing in life is permanent, including you.

warnings: mentions of death

word count: 2136

“We're only getting older, baby; And I've been thinking about it lately; Does it ever drive you crazy; Just how fast the night changes?”

It was yet another ordinary weekend night where Jonah and his band were gathered in the little studio of Daniel’s home, busy composing new music for their upcoming album without a care in the world when Corbyn’s phone rang all of a sudden.

Corbyn’s eyebrows raised in surprise when he saw the caller ID on the screen before sliding the answer button to the right and excusing himself from the small room to take the call. No one thought much about it and proceeded with their songwriting process. However, when half an hour passed with Corbyn’s absence, that was when Jonah’s gut feeling told him that something wasn’t right. He brushed that thought off as quick as it entered his mind, trying his best to ignore the fact that he caught a glimpse of the caller ID and it was his girlfriend’s mother calling him, which was undeniably weird. As his roommate and best friend, Jonah could confirm that she had never called Corbyn unless there was an emergency. Heck, the last time she called him was when her car broke down somewhere in downtown LA and Corbyn was the only one she knew who lived close enough to pick her up.

His suspicion was soon proven right when Corbyn barged into the room seconds later with tears running down his cheeks nonstop like a river. Daniel, who was seated the closest to the door jumped up in shock just as Corbyn fell into his arms and started sobbing. The other boys made their ways to them as Daniel patted Corbyn’s back in attempt to calm him down.

“What’s wrong?” Zach asked curiously and Jack elbowed him on the arm. “Ow, what was that for?” Zach exclaimed, earning a glare from the other male that clearly said, “Can’t you wait until he stops crying to pry for answers?”

“She killed herself,” Corbyn managed to say between sobs.

“Who?” Daniel asked softly.

“My girlfriend,” the 4 boys’ breaths hitched in utter shock. None of them were expecting this news in forever. Madeline was the most cheerful and optimistic girl Jonah had ever met. She brought sunlight and joy into every room she entered. Were those traits of hers merely a mask to hide all the despair and anxiety underneath? It didn’t make any sense whatsoever.

“My sweetheart killed herself,” Corbyn repeated, mostly to himself with a hint of disbelief in his tone. It was evident that he was still having a hard time letting the fact sink in. “We just went out for dinner last night and now she’s gone. Forever. She didn’t even say goodbye. What should I do? How can I live without her?”

“She should’ve said something. I could’ve done so much to help her instead of letting her die just like that. I saw the scars on her hand last night but I assumed it was nothing serious. It’s my fault. I could’ve stepped in and save her but I didn’t. Why? Why?!” Corbyn screamed and tugged at his hair frustratedly.

Silence ensued, the only sound being Corbyn’s uncontrollable sobs. No one said anything because they knew that no words were powerful enough to comfort him for the time being. The most they could do was be there for him.

#

Jonah pulled up in your driveway in the middle of the night. He left his house right away after ensuring that Corbyn was sound asleep in his room in fear of his best friend trying anything stupid under the influence of tremendous grief. He knew that you were probably asleep at this hour and he should’ve waited until the morning to pay you a visit but he couldn’t wait any longer. Madeline’s death had made him realise that nothing in life lasts forever and he wanted—no, needed—to be by your side tonight to make up for the past few days of neglecting you because of work.

After some debating in his head whether to wake you up from your deep slumber like an ignorant boyfriend or just turn around and go home, he turned off the engine and rushed out of his car and onto your doorstep before he could change his mind. He used the same key you gave him months ago to unlock the front door and was then greeted by a silent pitch black, empty living room. He locked the door with a soft click behind him before tiptoeing up the stairs and entering your room. He made sure to keep his movements as silent as possible as he knew better than anyone that you were a terribly light sleeper and could be awoken easily by the softest sounds. He took off his shoes and joined you on the king-sized bed, wrapping his arms around your sleeping figure gently to pull you closer to him. He contentedly nuzzled your hair, inhaling the sweet scent of your shampoo that smelled like cherry blossoms and spring air. It was only then he felt truly at ease, with you perfectly safe and sound in his arms.

As he half expected, you stirred from your sleep, wiggling your body slightly before turning towards him, your arms habitually made their way around his neck even in your half-awake state. You couldnt help but smile when you felt him tightening his arms around you like he was holding onto you for dear life. “Hey, love,” you mumbled groggily, staring up at him with droopy eyelids in your pyjamas that had bunny patterns all over them that you were more than embarrassed to be seen in by anyone but you could care less since Jonah had been your boyfriend long enough to know about your preference for childish pyjamas over mature flimsy nightgowns. “What brings you here?”

“Just wanna see you,” he replied with a smile. He tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear and took a moment to drink in your beauty—the crinkle by your eyes when you smile, you supple lips and the freckles on your cheeks that were illuminated by the soft moonlight that shone through the windows—all ordinary features of yours that you had never been particularly fond of but were all made perfect in his eyes. He was lucky to have the chance of calling you his, but Madeline’s unexpected death that night made him wonder how long this could last? Without realising, he let his mind drift further into the sea of uncertainties of the future, getting more anxious by the second, especially when he was met with the thought of ever losing you one day.

“Jo, are you okay?” You asked worriedly when you noticed his tense expression. He offered you a meek smile in return. “Yeah, everything’s fine,” he replied, but his furrowed brows claimed otherwise.

“You’re not fooling anyone with that face, dear. What’s wrong?” You watched him stay silent for a while as if he was trying to come up with a suitable answer to your question.

”I just...can I stay over tonight with you?” He asked and you let out a hum in agreement, your hands rubbing soothing patterns down his back. Even after all this time, he still hadn’t managed to get rid of the old habit of asking for your permission to spend the night at your place although he knew that you would agree without hesitation every single time he did so. You wanted nothing more than to find out what was going on in his head at that moment but he didn’t look like he was in the mood to talk, so you pushed your questions aside for later.

Both of you stayed like that for who knew how long, unmoving, limbs tangled with each other’s as the cool night breeze wafted into the room through the opened windows. “Madeline died,” he said out of the blue, breaking the silence. Shock was an understatement to what you felt. You couldn’t believe your ears. You weren’t exactly best friends with Madeline but still close enough to hang out together occasionally when both of you were free from your hectic schedules, mainly because Jonah and her used to have a thing for each other back in high school before she got with Corbyn so there had always been a tinge of awkwardness between you two. Yet this news hit you hard all the same.

Tears welled up in your eyes before you knew it. “When?”

“Few hours ago,” Jonah answered, his hand stroking your hair with the utmost gentleness, which prompted your tears to resume falling. He let you cry it all out without a single complaint about your tears staining his shirt. “She took her own life.”

“Why?” You sniffled and he shook his head. “No one knows; I guess even the most optimistic person on earth has her invisible demons too,” he said with a sigh.

“Is that the reason why you came here tonight?” You wiped your tears away with the long sleeves of your shirt as you took several deep breaths to recompose yourself, bracing yourself for his answer. Old feelings die hard, that was what you always hear people said, especially your first love. Part of you were scared that Jonah still harboured feelings for her even after all this years and you were nothing but an emotional support rebound tonight.

“Yes and no. I came here after hearing about the news, yes, but I’m not here to mourn about her, for now,” he added the last two words hastily in case you get the wrong idea and thought that he was being rude. You were ashamed for feeling extremely relieved that his answer wasn’t what you expected. “I came here to make up for the past few days of absence and make sure that you’re alright. Have you ever, you know, done that?”

It took you few seconds to get what he meant. “Of course not, Jo. I promise you, I never tried self-harm before, and I never will,” you replied truthfully.

“Thank god,” he sighed with relief and planted a tender kiss on your forehead, “I don’t know what I’d do if you said yes.”

“You know that you’ll be the first one I talk to if I have anything bothering me, right?” You took his hand in yours while staring at him expectantly for an answer but none came. “Jonah, please don’t tell me that you seriously think that I’m someone who resorts to harming myself when the going gets tough?”

“I...I don’t know,” he admitted sheepishly which earned a sigh from you, a small smile tugging at your lips. You still couldn’t believe how this man in front of you—a confident rising boyband star—could get so worked up over a plain girl like you. He swallowed thickly before continuing, “Today made me question everything I know like how long this relationship can last—how long we’ll get to stay us until the world decides to tear us apart. We always said we’ll be together until the end of times but so did Corbyn and Madeline and look at them now. Madeline just....left without a word to anyone. I know it’s stupid but I just couldn’t bear the thought of losing you and now I’m being such a sap and you probably are disgusted —”

“Jonah, stop. You’re over-thinking everything. I’m not disgusted at you, not even one bit,” you raised a hand to his cheek and traced a thumb over it tenderly, knowing that this simple gesture never failed to soothe his raging emotions. “It’s normal to feel this way, love. But whenever you do, please remember this: there’s nothing to be afraid of because I love you so much, Jonah Marais Roth Frantzich, that I can never ever think of hurting myself because I know that that’ll hurt you; I love you so much that I started crying a little less, smiling a little more because I know that no matter how hard my day is, I’ll always have you to come home to.”

You watched as a tear escaped from him. “I don’t know what the future holds but I can promise you this,” you locked your eyes with his, your gaze filled with the utmost love and adoration in contrast with his worried one. “No matter how fast the night changes, it’ll never change me and you.”

“You promise?” His lips curled upwards into a small smile as he leaned in, leaving only an inch between your lips, your breaths mingling with each other’s. As always, butterflies erupted in your stomach at the close proximity as you mirrored his expression with a sweet smile of your own.

“Forever and always,” you breathed and he closed the distance between your lips, sealing the promise.

#corbyn besson #daniel seavey #jack avery #jonah marais #wdw #why dont we #why don’t we #zach herron #wdw imagines #jonah marais imagines