#no cause I've thought of this constantly

[sinfulequity]

Was rewatching Double and. I think I finally pinpointed where John and Mikoto switch places!

You can see that the car that Mikoto is in turns to darkness like he just went into a tunnel. And then we have that transition of a pinpoint of light fading- to a light coming up and flooding the screen. It then immediately Cuts to seeing "Mikoto" running away from something. This time he's surrounded by light. Following the implications of that light transition

That means the running sequence is John trying to get to Mikoto in time and uh. Mikoto getting sick of everything and deciding to take Swift Action. Which may lead to the glitched line in the second trial voice trailer-

AAAHHHHHHHHHH!! DESTROY EVERYTHING. EVERYTHING! EVERYTHING!!

Incidentally, that would also lead to the answer of another thing I was questioning. "What's the other train car that's in use?" I believe that would make the car that Mikoto is in 9 and the car that John is in 10

#Milgram #Mikoto Kayano #thoughts #I've been trying to figure out where this switch occurred since Double dropped #I also have been having trouble doing that cause for some reason listening to Double makes my brain turn into white noise on a crt #Which is. Frustrating. Especially since by all rights I should like this song to the point of listening to it constantly #The video was meant to be a gif Tumblr just wouldn't allow it orz #idk if I've put this in a comprehensible way but I have tried my best orz

[markantonys]

the fact that my all-time second longest standalone WOT fic is going to be a gawyn one is too on-brand for me honestly. i was like "i just want to do a little channeler gawyn AU because it's neat to think about" and now i've got 87k and still a whole chapter left to write. boy i hope the 3 other gawyn enjoyers out there are ready to be fed!

#part of it is that i know this will be the only major gawyn-centric fic i ever write (probably) #so i'm like 'i've got to cram EVERY THOUGHT I HAVE ABOUT MY BOY into this one fic' #and as you know. i have Many thoughts about him. #it's also probably the only major gawyn-centric fic ANYONE will ever write so you know what he deserves every one of these 87k words #i wouldn't be surprised if this fic is a higher wordcount than the aggregate total of all gawyn pov in the actual books 😭 #wot #wot book spoilers #gawyn trakand #gawynposting #(yes this fic is 100% the cause of all my recent gawynposting lmao he's been on my mind Constantly!)

[thedragonemperess]

i think we as a society don’t talk enough about leo’s trauma because my man gets his arm and his leg crushed trying to save his family and then proceeds to get teased by his family for not being bionic enough when the whole reason he’s bionic is because he was trying to save them and he got hurt and especially his leg is treated like a joke the whole time, and then he finally finds a new way to combine his and his friends powers and it blinds his friend which hurt him so much that he quit?? he spends all four seasons begging to be bionic but this affected him so much he quits, only coming back because his family is in danger (again)

anyways i love him

THIS IS THE EXACT REASON WHY HIS AND DOUGLAS' FRIENDSHIP WAS SO NEEDED!!! IF THEY TOOK A BIT OF TIME TO LOOK INTO DOUGLAS PAST AND HOW HEAVILY THAT AFFECTED HIS CHARACTER, IT WOULD BE SO EASY TO TELL THAT HE AND LEO WOULD MIRROR EACH OTHER!! DOUGLAS, STREET TURNING OVER A NEW LEAF, WOULD BE AND TO BE THE PERSON FOR LEO THAT HE DESPERATELY NEEDED!!! THIS WOULD ALLOW LEO TO PROPERLY DEVELOP INTO THE BIONIC HERO THAT HE'S ALWAYS WANTED TO BE AND WOULD ALLOW DOUGLAS TO BE MORE THAN JUST COMEDY RELIEF, COMEDY RELIEF (EVIL), AND A SECOND DONALD!!!

#caps tw #answering asks #demon without a red circle #lrmmlref stuff #I've been thinking a lot about these shows again recently and i have been having. Thoughts. #lab rats #lab rats bionic island #lr #lrbi #douglas davenport #leo dooley #i wanted more of their friendship so bad 😭😭😭 #also as much as i love daniel it would have done exactly what daniel was setting out to do #daniel was essentially many to be like 'this was the good in douglas shining through back then #and this is douglas proving that he can still be a good parent and person now' #like #by him willingly taking up the role to mentor and help leo through all of the problems that the others are constantly causing him #as well as work through the self worth issues that he definitely has because of the others #starting all the way back during their banter from when he was still TECHNICALLY working with krane #is a way to do that that is just so much more interesting to watch #and this doesn't necessarily mean he has to replace big d or tasha #it just means that donald and tasha are now more free to do different things for leo and the lab rats that feel less demeaning #to leos existence #I'm sorry I'm rambling XD

[fiepige]

More Sea Serpent Hobie thoughts!

(been thinking about this au all day, it's completely consumed my mind!)

I was kinda toying with the idea of Hobie being able to take a human form. (In this version most people wouldn't know that sea serpents exist so he uses it as a way to interact with humans without revealing his true nature to them)

He visits a small local fishing village from time to time to hang out with the locals- mostly at the pub, but he also likes hanging around at the harbour

Cause he just gets lonely sometimes and humans make fun company- he finds tales about daring trips to sea entertaining, but he also loves to hear stories about places from far within the mainland as he's always stayed close to the ocean.

Nobody in the village knows what he really is- they all just think he's this odd but kind loner who visits from time to time.

He's well renowned by the people in the village, both for being a nice and helpful guy and because of his unique skills*

He never pays for anything in cash but instead in old trinkets and treasures he finds while out at sea - this resulted in a few arguments at first, but now people have come to accept it, some even look forward to seeing what he'll pull out as payment whenever he visits

if he doesn't have any treasure to pay with he'll offer to pay in favours- specifically favours that involve diving.

*If you need a diving job done he's your guy

He can stay underwater forever and go far deeper than any of the locals.

So if you need to retrieve something from, let's say a sunken ship, he's your guy!

He insists on going on missions alone- it's just easier to get it done if he can dive unseen in his serpent form.

The only people he doesn't get along with are authority figures and whalers!

There aren't any whalers residing in the village but sometimes a whaling boat will come by to restock. Every time they do Hobie terrorizes the crew as much as he can get away with. While also being very vocal about his opinion of them in general. He's gotten in fights with them more than once.

It's also not unusual for the whalers to find their ship vandalised if they stay overnight.

When he's in his human form he lives on a small island near the village, but far enough away that he can't be seen changing from serpent to human form and vice versa

He has a small hut where he keeps some fishing equipment (mostly for show in case a human comes by and wonders how he's able to feed himself on this tiny island) as well as a small garden where he grows different greens.

He'll trade his food for stuff with the villages, he mostly trades for clothes, sewing equipment or beer at the pub

Sometimes he'll disappear at sea for weeks at a time- if any of the villagers question him about it he'll just say he was out fishing- despite him only owning a small rowboat with a small engine, that doesn't work half the time. - He uses it to get to and from the island in human form as to not alert the villagers to his true form.

At some point he befriends Gwen**, who's a newcommer, when a local overhears her lamenting the loss of her mother's trinket at sea, and they suggest she asks Hobie for help- since the guy has a way of finding things lost at sea

Gwen doesn't really believe he can actually find it but seeks him out nonetheless cause it can't hurt to ask

Hobie accepts the job. In exchange he wants Gwen to tell him about the places she's been to before she moved to the village.

(** you can kinda replace Gwen with any character you want. I'm kinda considering making a small fic for this au where the reader takes Gwen's place, but I don't have the time nor energy to write it any time soon. Also I've never written a fic from the first person point of view so I'm not sure how it would turn out lol.)

Lemme know what you guys think! 💙Any input is welcome- it can be world building stuff, story stuff, ideas for hobie's serpent form or something else!

#oh yeah I'm normal about this au #it's not like I'm constantly thinking about it- imagining all the stories and interactions you could write for this au #I've even drawn a few scetches of hobie's sea serpent form but I can't really settle on what I want him to look like #cause on one hand I kinda want him to be humanoid/mermaid like- but on the other hand I want him to actually look like a serpent! #might share them at some point but I haven't really drawn one that I want to consider his true form yet so idk #all I do know for certain is that I want him to be BIG in his serpent form #also any thoughts and inputs from you guys is greatly appreciated! #cause this au is still very new so I'd love to hear other people's ideas going forward #hobie brown #spider punk #sea serpent hobie #across the spider verse #atsv #across the spiderverse #across the spider verse au #spiderverse #my post #my au

[deoidesign]

I love Time and Time Again!! It was genuinely interesting to see two characters talk things out. Of course they kept secrets, but they knew when to reveal them and that made me want to stick around and read it. Thankyou for making such a wonderful comic!!

Thank you so much!!!

This really means a lot to me <3

I think there's generally a tendency to believe that relationships can't be nice in a romance or the story will be boring.

I understand where this idea comes from, stories should have conflict! And, real world relationships have conflict, as well. They always will! It makes sense that most stories centered around relationships would, inevitably, at some point, have disagreements, fights, anger...

I get why others enjoy it, its messy it's fun it's drama! but for me personally it just stresses me out since I've done so much work to NOT be like that!

As a writer, when presented with two people who are reasonably at odds with eachother, where neither of them is in the wrong per se, but someone still ends up hurt... it's a fun challenge to write them working through it in a believable way. it's a fun challenge, too, to put them into situations that feel equal and human.

I just think it's a necessary thing for who I am as a person to write relationships the way I do, and so I'm just very very very glad that other people resonate with it as well!

It means a lot. Thank you.

#me trying not to ramble on for paragraphs impossible challenge #asks #anon #I always love to talk about how uhhh #the perceptions we have of how relationships should be displayed #idk I dont think that theres any one way to do it #those relationships where people dont communicate and they fight all the time... #those happen. they happen all the time irl. #of course they would be reflected in fiction constantly! #but just for me personally #after YEARS and years and years of working on myself so I dont do that #I pause. think the best of my partner before jumping to conclusions. #take the moment to ask him hey #has anything been bothering you lately? things have been good but I want to be sure there's not little things I've done to hurt you #and i listen when hes telling me that yes. it did bother him when I made that joke the other day actually #and to learn to be patient #and not cry immediately #and listen #and ask instead of assuming #and always think the best thoughts first or whatever #its done me a world of good #and I dont think it is healthy for me personally as a person to write an unhealthy relationship with poor communication #because I get uhm... extremely invested in my writing... #in the way that it very much helps me learn about myself and practice habits. #cause obviously I still fail. of course I will #and I just would like to get as much practice as I can #of being better #for me and for him #and for all my friends

[wherela]

called my boyfriend cause he hadn't been replying to my messages properly and I got anxious, and we talked and I cried and he apologised and promised to try do better. so then I sent him a message to thank him for listening, and he read it and just never replied. so now I wanna cry again

#look I know he's sick so that means he wont be putting as much effort into this #but I thought the conversation went really really well #and now I feel neglected again ughhh #and he knows this bothers me and normally really tries to reply immediately #i just. I dont know what to do any more I don't wanna have to constantly ask for attention #when I see him live? sure. I don't have to #but I haven't seen him in a week cause I've been away #i need a hug :( #mine #s

[skunkg1rll]

i cant stop thinking abt him... have been doing that all daynd i feel so sad nd my heart hurtsso bad nd i long for him sm it's just a bad day :((

#it's bc i saw that he #uploaded his background which was just nothing. and said that he feels empty #and a couple of months ago before i ruined it all #he said that he had me as his background #so now i feel so fkn sad #i dont know why im like this but i feel so crazy about him i wanna die #i think about him constantly and i'venever ever wanted to be with or know someone this badly #and to know that he sees me as a disappointment... and not good enough for him... and that he doesnt love me enough to wanna fix it #or even have a 'it' with me #hurts so bad #so now im just in an awful headspace... #i hate myself so much #i wish i could go back and not do what i did #i did it bc i thought it'd bring me closer to him #but i was wrong and i didnt understand that until now #and instead it caused him to think im not what he thought i was or what he wants me to be #and no matter how much i try to explain i realize thatonly i understand #bcmy brains broken and no one could ever understand why i do what i do #i am alone. always and forever i will never know closeness or intimacy #the thing is thatbefore i met him i was fine w that #i kinda longed for it but i had resigned myself to a life without it #then i met him nd it felt real nd like it could bereal for me #plus i genuinely like him sm i feel sm for him so i desperately want it w him #but then..... it turned out that im not good enough for him #it just rlly hurts that the ONLY time i've ever wanted someone #and it started w them wanting me back #who i am was a disappointment nd i fucked it up bc of a misunderstanding #that i cant clear up bc i cant make anyone understand my fucked up broken reasoning #i will bealone forever and i just wanna die

[mooodyblue]

🫠

#i want to slam my head against the wall #i've been feeling constant anxiety since friday and i think it's starting to take a toll on me bc i've felt super sick for #the past 24 hours and i know what's causing it but i'm trying to not focus on a specific aspect of it but im so tired of this feeling like #it's a constant feel of worry for no reason and its been hard to breathe my head hurts i'm nauseous im shaking constantly #idk what the hell is goin on i just want to nawt feel like this so i can try and write but my stupid little thoughts are just !! so bad and #i just want to not think!!!! i want to not feel things!!! i want to stop feeling this way!!!!! #this sucks so bad i don't like feeling this way at all i hate it i hate it i hate it #there's nothing to be done to fix this either it's just my stupid brain overthinking i want to just #ugh #distractions are hard #writing would help me rn honestly #and i miss elvis i hope he knows i'm trying like im really trying but it's been hard #i really am trying

[nagitoedit]

you don't have to read this is for screaming in the void

#trying to explain that i'm struggling without saying the big most important part of why i am struggling is . #like oh i'm struggling because uh . the issues. what are the issues? well . they are issues that i refuse to elaborate on #so it doesn't help anybody. but like how am i supposed to explain to my mom that the reason i've become so severely depressed is because #i'm suicidal. like oh btw ^-^ i hate the life you gave me and brought me into so bad that i want to die. but it's no big deal so don't worr #about it. #which like that wouldn't be how i meant it at all but of course that's also implied or something #which just makes me think of other things like that if things weren't so bad id be able to get help but help is inaccessible. #ughhhh i just hate this it's so agonizing. like cant things be a little less bad. i'm not having fun being like this and people are #reasonably irritated with me because only based on what i'm willing to tell just. isn't the full story at all and would obviously just. #not make sense because i'm leaving out major parts of what's happening and why. #and tbh i'm constantly going back and forth between like. coming out as suicidal. mainly because like. well. it kinda worrying me. #because for like months now i've almost daily been fighting off suicidal thoughts and often even having suicidal meltdowns #yesterday i was standing near a ceiling fan and was like hmm wouldnt it be nice if one of the blades came off and stabbed me through #the back of my skull and killed me. but then i thought no that would be too traumatizing for my family #as if me dying at all wouldn't be. which i also thought of. idk just thinking about the idea of #i want to live but not like this. because yeah. my mom said that she thinks reading bad news is why and it's like well . of course it is #but should i just stay completely unaware of what's happening in the world. but also bad news is just unavoidable #but yeah it is why i'm depressed. climate change racism homophobia transphobia covid wars economy etc like #these are things that i can't just. ignore? and am i seriously the crazy person for being upset about these things? #well she does think i'm crazy for still being scared of the dangerous virus that is currently the third leading cause of death in the us #like last night she was like ' it's good to be cautious but you're going over board' i'm friends with people who could die from covid. #'over board' i care about them and other people and i don't want them to die. i don't want to be permanently disabled by a virus with #a 20% chance every time i catch it to permanently damage my immune system and give me long covid. <- according to cdc #but whatever. i do genuinely want mental help. i think i need s different medication or a diagnosis bc uhmmm . i am unwell #but that's expensive. #i have an appointment with a doctor today for a med check because i don't think my ssri is working . obviously #as i am as you can tell absolutely overcome with severe and debilitating anxiety and depression. lolzors #whatever. except not because ouuuughhhgh <-unimaginable suffering #mypost

[gxlden-angels]

I don't know how many of you watch/listen to Belief it or Not but I love his concern about a USAmerican pastor bringing a gun on stage for a message cause my old pastor openly bragged about being armed all the time

#gun mention #gun tw #and yes of course it was in the southeast #yeehaw :))) #I hated it #I understand the reasons why and it's very nuanced especially in the aftermath of multiple attacks on black churches #black churches are a staple of black communities and while I don't like christianity #I will defend the right of black churches to keep serving their communities #I hated his weird 'look at me I'm so modern and hip I'm not a pacifist like most christians' energy #It was really fuckin weird and it made me feel so uneasy #He implied most christians are passive and hate guns as if 'god guns and glory' wasn't a whole thing #idk I've had some iffy experiences with guns so I don't like them #and that was one of them #gave me bad anxiety of 'if you have a gun here (what I thought was the safest/holiest place as a kid) #then that means everywhere else is even less safe than I thought since you still need protection here #and no one helped me cause a) fear being sin and b) them holding onto the idea of Jesus personally protecting their church from harm #so they insisted that was and would always be the case #and starting to grow up in the social media scape and constantly learning about tragedy even in churches #well let's just say my OCD didn't come from nowhere #was genuinely convinced Id cause a shooting by worrying about it too much #I'm a lot better now #I'm much secure in the idea of a world of neutrality #Things happen and things don't happen and that's how chaos and nature work #I am not better or safer at a church but it doesn't mean Im never safe #And it doesn't mean Im never loved #anyways I got off topic this was meant to be a yeehaw Im from the south pew pew guns merica am I right? type post #but y'all know how I am I've gotta lot to say #thanks for reading <3 #ex christian #religious trauma

[istoleludwigsbaumkuchen]

My body feels like it's falling apart and I can hardly take it anymore

(Vent in tags)

#vent #aparently the guy who thought it was fine to call me a cripple because he had to wear a boot cause he sprained his ankle #said i was faking being disabled #Like dude #I wish i was faking this shit #constantly being in pain and having times where i am literally unable to walk unaided is not silly and fun #I've got a near constant headache and fear heatstroke every single time i walk home because of the heat #They're sending me to 3 different specialists to see if it really is just because of my arfid or not #I'm just tired man #I'm being stretched too thin and i cant do anything about it

[spokelseskladden]

My psychologist is validating me so hard rn, can't believe i was ever worried about talking to her tbh. Like I'll say something and she'll nod and say yeah my guy. That's pretty trans of you. Well she says it more professionally than that but still.

#she made a note of me having early signs of gender dysphoria in childhood #and basically said that the doubts I've experienced seems to be a sign in and of itself so ya #I've had a really bad time lately with the good old dysphoria so it's just good to get it all out #cause I'm constantly bothered by it but she's actually really helpful in coming up with things i can do right now #like putting my thoughts and feelings into perspective and accepting that they're there #stuff like that y'know

[sxcret-garden-archive]

,

#really sorry the comfort drabbles are taking so long... #i'm kinda not in the best place mentally and don't know how to get out of that atm so that's why i have no motivation to do anything #everything feels.... pointless #and hard.... way too hard #i can't relax around people and it's even worse since moving back from the dorms cause now not even home feels like a place where i can #let go anymore #i don't reallt have anything to do atm either cause i'm done with uni and won't get a job for now cause i wanna apply for studying abroad #(i've talked about that tho) #and also i cannot handle a job atm #i feel like i can't handle anything atm but i feel so guilty for doing nothing that i can't rest #i feel constantly agitated and can't calm down and i need a safe space so badly but idk where that would be #i thought as soon as i was done with exams i could finally focus on writing #but i have such bad writer's block rn that i can barely relax enough to write #and that feels pointless too tbh... #whatever

[clouds-oc-corner]

...help I am starting to have ships for my ocs

#talking about them #gaiughwuegiwo #well I've somewhat known this for a while already but like #thieagreiuiwejiofe #also the ships are: lenore and danielle; Lilly and Olive(???) #also like just a little bit more thoughts about my ocs relationships in general: #Olive saw Trevor one day and decided 'yes I will take that little ball of anxiety under my wing and teach him confidence' or smth #trevor is a bit intimidated by her at first but slowly grows comfortable and they become close <3 #then there's Lilly and Astro who dislike each other <3 #Lilly dislikes Astro because of a combination of jealousy bad vibes and probably smth else too? #they're constantly snarking each other #huh come to think of it Olive is probably gonna end up being the one who everyone can depend on asks for advice for comfort #Huh #well anyways #Lilly is Sylvia's first friend and because of Sylvia learning the ~ways of friendship~ from her she decides to befriend Astro #or she and Astro first get assigned to a group project together #but I like Sylvia being the one to approach him #I should give Astro neopronouns cause like in his initial idea he was nonbinary #and like #I think it'd be neat #mayhaps also Lilly #Astro and Olive meet before Astro and Lilly and also Lilly and Olive resolve their dislike of each other #I've had the idea they meet by like... smoking outside the school or smth #but like?? idk if I want that in my story?? so?? #yeah I think I'm gonna end this ramble here eheh

[donttouchtheneednoggle]

head hurty

#not any more like that but last night #love having a pain condition triggered partly by anxiety but also it caused the anxiety to be constant in the first place #i dont get chronic migraines bc i dont get them often enough its usually like 1 every 2 months nowadays but sometimes it can be 4 in a week #bc having one makes it more likely i have a another soon after #but i sure as fuck have acute migraines #i remember being in school and classmates being like oh i have a migraine going off to take their meds and then coming back to class?! #whereas as soon as i had an aura id go to the office and be like can you call my mum she needs to take me home #and i thought i was just being weak and i should just push through it #but you can't push through acute pain nausea vomiting and disorientation #there are literally parts of my brain or thoughts i can't access during one ill be trying to think of a word and i can't find it #they usually only last like 2-3 hours but it feels like a lot longer when you're sitting in the dark can't even lie down feeling like hell #and ik some peoples go on for days some people have them more days than they dont ik im lucky to have such short and fairly infrequent ones #but its still beyond horrible and feeling like a ticking time bomb constantly watching out for an aura #and worrying about going somewhere you can't easily get home from #and I've only just started to be able to talk about it i could never understand how other people could talk about theirs flippantly #when mine terrified me more than anything the amount of bad feelings #but she's working on it having realised after 8 years that it doesn't have to be like that 🤣 #mine #n e way sorry for the rsnt all good now chillin in bed ✌🤣

[nessaswwritingandadmiring]

Other Authors Writing Self-Inserts/OC-Inserts: "And they fell in love with a beloved character and/or its a fix it."

Me: I love you authors great job! I love the concept it's so fun and always a pick-me-up.

*closet rattling*

Me: uh-uh. Don't mind that!

*Closet door starts breaking open.*

Me: *runs over to try to keep it shut* Everything's fine! No worries. Its just some old concepts I have on insets in media. Don't worry. They're just like yours-

*closet door and me flings across the other side of the room*

Out comes my Eldritch Horror Abominations OC-Inserts who make everything worse/fix-it-of sorts:

I was beginning to think you'd forgotten me...

Anyways. I love writing Eldritch Horror Inserts because it just makes sense for me :) Are we not the creators of these worlds?

#star wars #Fandoms #fictional character #self-inserts #Listen I love OC-Inserts or Self-inserts #They are like candy to me or brownies #But in my mind my ones are like #Ah yes coming from another universe wouldn't cause some wacky affects that certainly don't trescend the universe they are in now. #Listen if we came from our world. And we create their world. Doesn't that mean we are Gods. #I'm just saying #We create and rewrite their worlds constantly. We pick and choose who lives and dies. #I'm just saying that entering a world we helped to create would mean we would have to change physically. #Do we transcend time in the worlds we create? I would say yes. #Are we a superior life form that could not simply be a character on a page without some eldritch horror stuff happening? #star wars fanfiction #Just these thoughts run through my head constantly. #Let me know if you'd like to hear more. Cause I've already written a chapter way ahead of time.