#need more androgynous girls energy

[mlarty]

Marrow, the Dark Urge 🌹🗡 finally a ref sheet for our beloved bhaal-babe

And some additional info: 1. "Patterns" on her face, body, and arms are not tattoos or defects, but scars that she made herself in her bloody past. The only birth scar is her "navel" (she doesn't have it) 2. Called an "artificial" because she was born in an unnatural way and is not a real tiefling 3. The sclera of her eyes is not just red — their surface is covered with many inflamed and enlarged vessels, especially in Dark Urge episodes

Personality type: 1w9, ISTP

thank you for loving her

#baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #dark urge #durge #durge oc #marrow #ref sheet #artists on tumblr #bhaal babe #need more androgynous girls energy #bard + fighter = biter

[col-e7]

Ninjago headcanons again but my high school with no powers AU (post 1/5)

/!\ TW : traumas, E.D, depression, SH, cigarettes and dr8gs, bullying, mental health, violence, VERY long post with the worse grammar possible /!\

This will be a serie of 5 posts with 3 characters each time. Any ideas, suggestions, headcanons or anything to complete mine is appreciated !

Kai Smith

• is 17 y/o

• is in 11th grade

• uses he/they pronouns but prefers being seen as a guy

• androgyne and pansexual

• are Mexican by their mother and Japanese by their father

• fluent speakers in Spanish and Japanese

• he’s between 5’7 and 5’8 tall (somewhere between 1m70 and 1m72)

• they’re the 3rd older after Zane and Cole

• they’re born on 18 august

• has I.E.D (intermittent explosive disorder)

• has insomnia since the burglary happened (in my AU, Kai and Nya’s parents died stopping burglars who entered in the house, Kai were 10 and Nya 9)

• everyone knows him and his relation with his siblings and how you shouldn’t hurt or annoy them if you don’t want to go to the hospital (that’s what happened to Lloyd’s bullies in middle school)

• due to what they did to Lloyd’s bullies, they had to pay for the damage and the treatment. It took them almost a year and half to find the money

• has a LOT of followers on his socials, especially instagram

• is good at English, P.E., politics and social classes and surprisingly good at art (only at whatever touching fashion like anatomy, outfit sketches and drawing different textures/fabrics)

• wants to be a model or work in fashion industry

• has dated a lot of people in their life but it never lasted more then two months because of his I.E.D that their partner didn’t understand or search to understand, his habit to never seek help or say anything about his feelings

• is currently dating Skylor since the beginning of summer but they realise that they have maybe catch feelings for Cole

• is the only one with Jay to have a driver license

• always getting in trouble with school or students because they fight a lot (is easily provoked)

• work hard after school everyday (he’s overexploited by his boss and knows it but can’t quit his job because he couldn’t afford the apartment or pay any food)

• hate seeking help, see it as weakness

• his insomnia get worse due to his night job and homeworks

• hide his dark rings with a bit of makeup

• was extremely afraid to wear dresses and skirts, anything for « girls » at school but since 10th grade they found the confidence to wear whatever they want and enjoys it

• loves help Lloyd with his art project when they need a model

• goes to art galleries with Lloyd and anything linked to fashion with Skylor and Cole

• have his right eye that moves more slowly than the other and his right pupil bigger and the left one because of one of the burglar : one of them was about to hit Nya by throwing some glass at her and he got between them to protect his sister and his upper eyes take some glass and that stupid little idiot tried to remove it but only make it worse and now, plus making his vision worse they also have a scar now

• loves going out at night with Cole when they end up high and talk about life and philosophical things in the moonlight

• organise hangouts with the entire friend group to the mall when he has enough money and they always ending up to do a sleepover at someone’s house (usually Jay’s because his parents are the kindest people ever)

• ALWAYS wear one black converse and the other red that he wrote on some lyrics of Lana del Ray « Say yes to me… » and « If you dance,… » that he match with Cole’s converse

• always on energy drinks to stay awake

• have an amazing sense of style and can make a beautiful outfit with the bare minimum, and can spend HOURS in a thrift store

• is a party animal since he can rarely go to parties with his job but those parties usually finished with him fighting or being so high or drunk he can’t even go home (he already spend a night outside bcz of that)

• they hate themselves for being a such problem and « bad brother », for being not mentally stable or economically stable as well

• they stop taking their medicine for their I.E.D because he couldn’t pay for both of his treatments and Lloyd’s ADHD medication

• used to skip meals to feed Nya and Lloyd, sometimes does it when it’s the end of the month and he can barely buy enough food for two persons

• has a HUGE crush on Cole since the beginning of the year

• was afraid for Nya when she gets in her first relationship but relax and learn to trust her and saw there were nothing to be worry about

• their fav artists are Hozier and Lady Gaga

• always ask to their therapist what Lloyd said to her but she always give answers like : "Kai, would you, please, considerate to turn off your big brother mode for an hour ? "

• doesn’t know to swim since they’re hella scared of water

• can plays drums

• definitely a mama’s boy

• has a naturally hotter body temperature

Cole Hence Brookstone

• is 18 y/o

• is in 11th grade because he repeat his 9th grade

• uses he/him and sees himself as a cis man

• gay

• is Algerian on his mother side and Indian on his father side

• fluent speaker in Arabic, Hindi and French and is learning Korean and Spanish

• he’s the second tallest after Zane : he’s between 6’2 and 6’3 (between 1m90 and 1m93)

• always sleeping in classes he found boring because his sleep schedule is a totally mess (goes with Kai in the back of the class and do their nap together)

• he’s the oldest of the group, being born one month before Zane

• doesn’t know what to do after school and he feels anxious about it because all his friends have already some ideas

• writes songs/poems in class in a notebook where he writes about his life/traumas, his thoughts and draws some doodles, he considers it like his diary and never shows it to anyone

• he has been diagnosed with an E.D (boulimia) at 6 and even tho he tried to handle it, he always has like severe periods in a year where he loses a lot of weight and feels extremely tired and bad, at the point he did a depression in 9th grade. It was already hard to get ready for school and go to classes so doing homework and listening to the teachers was almost impossible that’s why he repeated the year

• he get, followed after by Nya and Lloyd when they get 16, a motorcycle licence one week after he got 16. He needed it to drive himself to school since his dad isn’t always at home because of his work and since he’s often drunk he prefers to go by himself

• he smokes and very rarely dr8gs with Kai. Lloyd often ask if he could pay them some cigarettes but Cole never does because 1 : "you’re literally a walking angel alive, you’re too pure for that shit" and 2 : " You want me dead and your siblings in jail ??"

• genuinely DESPISE P.E. class because of the changing room mostly. When he was in 8th grade he has been bullied for being gay and “watching boys changing in P.E.” and has been beaten up by his classmates for that. The year after the boulimia didn’t help and he would constantly comparing himself to other and thought he eat too much and doesn’t do enough sport, adding to that the comments of the P.E. teacher

• never goes outside without his headphones and a pair of earbuds too in case his headphones die

• people usually think he’s tough but actually he’s the kindest and sweetest guy ever and gives the best hugs when you need it

• does sleepovers with Skylor and Vania or just Vania but Nya, Pix and Skylor often invite themselves to the party

• speaks to Skylor in Arabic just to watch others’s faces

• learns Korean to understand Jay and Spanish to understand Kai, Nya and Skylor

• plays guitar and has a band with Morro, Akita and Vania

• he does not sing because he just can’t but he can perfectly do rap and beatbox

• he has daddy issues not due to his family legacy but mostly due to his father who can’t make his grieve of his wife and drink

• can do breakdance but will never do it in high school

• protects Lloyd every times he sees they’re being annoyed

• has a ton of pairs of converse but one black with the lyrics « say yes to heaven » and « I’ll dance » that Kai and him matched

• BIG HUGE fan of Cigarettes after sex (his fav songs of them are Sunsetz and Cry)

• his fav artists are Cigarettes after sex, TV girl, Arctic Monkeys, Conan Gray and Pyo (he’s a little singer go listen to his songs they’re worth it *^*)

• his coming out to his father was an absolute disaster and is one of his biggest traumas : his dad saw him and Kai kissing each other one day, so when he explained that Kai was more than a friend and that he was attracted to men, they had a huge fight while Kai was trying to defend his boyfriend but he had to go outside to calm himself down while he heard the screams and shoutings of the two men. After like a half of an hour, his father decided to kick him out of the house. He had to sleep at the Smith’s. The next day he tried to talk to his dad but he was drunk and told him he had no son, that he was dead and that’s why he threw all his stuff out of the window. Cole just took the stuff that was still intact -which means not a lot- by holding tears and leave the house

• spend two months in a hospital because of his ED which became so severe he lost 15 or 20kg (~33 and 44 ibs), he had a constant headache, was very tired close to the dehydration

• loves skateboarding with Morro and Lloyd

• after getting out of the hospital and tried his best to recover of both his traumas and his ED he get a tattoo for this : a dragon with lilies’s petals and flames

• has a big crush on Kai since middle school and Jay was the first to noticed it

• him and Jay have the most philosophical and deepest conversations ever about love and relationships, at 3am, calling each other on discord and playing horror video games

• studies with Zane (at least tries to) and our poor Zane had to survive to a freaking out lost Cole in math : " WHAT’S x ? WHAT’S y ? WHERE ARE NUMBERS WHEN YOU NEED IT ??!! "

• goes to gym with Zane, Kai and Nya

• mama’s boy club with Kai

Lloyd Montgomery Garmadon

• just turned 16 a few weeks ago

• are in 11th grade too (skipped 1st grade)

• use they/them pronouns and identify as a trans man

• thought they were biromantic and asexual but after a sexuality identity crisis that everyone has been, they discovered they were aroace

• they have autism and ADHD

• is Japanese on his mother side and Chinese on his father side

• can speak Japanese and Spanish thanks to the Smith siblings

• they’re 5’2 (1m57) will have growth spurt and be taller than Kai, being like 5’9-5’10 (1m77)

• they’re the youngest in the group

• has been abandoned by their parents in an orphanage at a very young age because their parents are criminals (i will develop this point later because i have literally no idea for now ;-;) but they ran away because of the way kids were treated. They found Kai after a month to live in the streets and quickly bonded after a talk. Kai decided to help Lloyd after heard their story and brought them home

• when they entered in the first time in a school they’re like 5 and it was in a kindergarten and they feel really different of the others kids, feel lost and overwhelmed by all the social interactions like at the orphanage but worse and cried almost all the morning before a teacher came and help them to calm down. And it was like that for a whole week, Lloyd didn’t wanted to disappoint Kai or Nya or took the risk of being rejected again so the teacher helped them to talk to Kai when he picked them up. Kai contacted a doctor who told them to see a psychiatrist for that case. So Kai contacted his therapist who diagnosed his I.E.Dto make an appointment. She was very kind with Lloyd and after a few months she diagnosed them both autism and ADHD

• are very intelligent but started getting bag grades after 6th grade because of the school system that is absolutely terrible for them with their ADHD and autism

• they’ve been bullied since 5th grade and started developing a school phobia and since they say everything to their siblings, Kai and Nya let them stay at home when they don’t feel like to go to school

• Jay helps them handle their ADHD since he has it too and also gives them tips about their transition since Jay’s also trans. Zane give them advices on their autism since they are autistic

• are extremely good at art and their whole bedroom is literally an art studio with graffiti on their walls, a lot of finished or unfinished paintings and a LOT of sheets filled with sketches and drawings on the floor or on his desk

• own like 6-7 sketchbooks, have started them all but never finished them (yet they still hope to finish them)

• have a few hyperfixations and the biggest ones are definitely sharks and video games (Jay bought them some books about sharks and gives them some of his own video games and Cole some plushies of sharks)

• have two hoodies (one green that looks like a frog and an another black that looks like a cat) that they put on when they feel overwhelmed by the noise around them

• have tried to learn how to play guitar but failed miserably so instead they just play violin and they’re amazingly amazing at it ✨

• have wayyyyyy too much plushies that they found on thrift store, theirs siblings/friends gave them or just found them in public places being lost for days. Lloyd gaves names and pronouns to each of them

• used to wear glasses but always ended up broken either by their bullies or by themselves so Pixal and Zane designed, with the help of their parents contact lenses for their 13th birthday

• vans shoes lover

• have for best friend Akita, a girl in their class and with who they have their best laughs in class. She’s their confidante after Kai and Nya

• often skating with Cole and Morro

• teach Akita how to do skateboarding

• their fav artists are Cavetown, The Neighbourhood, Feldup (mostly known in France even tho his songs are in English) and Hozier (thanks to Kai)

• always draw in class except History and English classes, their fav (they’re kind of history nerd)

• have depression episodes more or less serious but they are cutting themselves during those and try to attempt to k!ll themselves (mostly due to bullying and their poor self esteem)

• when they have nightmares they go to sleep with their favourite plushies in Kai’s bed, with Nya when she does nightmares and they both hug Kai for comfort and warmth because Kai has a naturally hotter body temperature

• often think about how they got adopted by Kai, where and who were their parents and ask themselves why they decided to abandon them, and always end up crying, feeling useless, unworthy and unwanted

That’s it for now !! Hope your day was great if not, i hope your tomorrow will !

The next characters in the next post will be Jay, Nya and Zane ! Hope you enjoyed those headcanons I may considering to make a fanfiction based on it idk anyways bye byeee !!

#ninjago #cole brookstone #kai ninjago #kai smith #lavashipping #cole x kai #lego ninjago #ninjago cole #ninjago nya #jay walker #ninjago lloyd #lloyd garmadon #zane julien #ninjago kai #ninjago zane #ninjago headcanons #au ninjago #high school au

[youremyheaven]

What are the list of archetypes you see Punarvasu/Jupiter women embody? I know you mentioned the courtesan, the mistress, the dream girl/trophy wife, and also marrying royalty. What is it about these women that makes men see them as the ideal and are even willing to risk their marriage/livelihood for them? I’m a Punarvasu Moon. I wish I could completely analyze my Vedic birth chart, but I’m not good at Vedic astrology yet. I’m actually learning a lot from your posts.

about archetypes; look out for my future posts💛

i had already mentioned in my posts about Cancer being the most feminine sign. Be it tropical or vedic, Cancer is the height of femininity.

A tropical Cancer can in vedic be Ardra, Punarvasu or Pushya

3 nakshatras fall into Cancer rashi;

Punarvasu 20 degree gemini to 3 degree cancer

Pushya 3-16 degree cancer

Ashlesha- 16-29 degree cancer

In sidereal, Ardra falls entirely within the Gemini constellation and Ashlesha is tropically entirely Leo. therefore the only nakshatras that tropically and vedically remain in Cancer are Punarvasu & Pushya

I exclude both Ardra & Ashlesha nakshatras when I speak about Cancerian femininity because imo they're not truly representative of it (i'll make a future post regarding it)

but in order to understand what makes these women so desirable to men, we must first understand "desirability" itself. sexual polarity is what creates desire and being innately yin, these women attract yang and encourage men to be more yang. ive often seen discussions about femininity online (be it soft girls, divine feminines or trad wives) and there seems to be a certain emphasis on appearing gentle and submissive but this is slightly misguided.

Cancerian women embody true femininity because they are kind, and naturally receptive (yin) they seek to absorb yang energy because they have none of it within themselves. This pull (some call it neediness) means seeking out that active yang energy, this makes men eager to serve them and do things for them. Yang is an active force and it NEEDS to feel useful. Cancer is a passive sign and it needs to draw upon external yang energy. HOWEVER this hardly means they're doormats or meek and "submissive" (the way this word is commonly understood), it takes a great deal of wisdom to understand the kind of power these women possess. they are "steel magnolias."

a docile, submissive girl will not enthral or magnetize anyone, Punarvasu & Pushya are ruled by Jupiter & Saturn, these are masculine planets and in my understanding these women are emotionally very masculine and in order to compensate for how masculine/androgynous they feel internally, they project a very hyperfeminine manner & conduct. they make more of an effort to "appear feminine" in dressing, style, manners than most other women because internally they don't feel feminine enough. thats why their femininity is so exaggerated, its almost like they're putting on a performance (im NOT calling them fake)

what this means is that they are emotionally cultivated and well developed and not doormats. they project gentleness and a certain vulnerability but they are resilient & strong. this creates intrigue and makes them enthralling to men. someone who seems needy but does not need you at all? it makes the guys go weak in their knees

Cancer is the Mother archetype. how are mothers? they are nurturing, gentle, loving and stern without being harsh (ideally) you don't want to hurt mom, because she's THE woman in your life (i know that everyone has a different dynamic with their mom but im speaking in the broadest possible terms)

Yang energy is the energy of giving and both Punarvasu & Pushya women are known for marrying well. their naturally receptive energy enables them to connect to men who want to give to them endlessly; be it royal titles, wealth, status or their lives 👀🤭

[gaypolls]

ok i just said it doesn't really bother me but i do wanna rant a little bc it's SO insane to claim that you're only a real homosexual if you've never felt an ounce of attraction to ANYONE but your own gender... as though True Attraction is easily defined and quantifiable for everyone? as though gendered attraction is in and of itself something that involves some essence of other people's genders or whatever and not just what you percieve???

think of how many twinks have mistaken for butches and vice versa lmao. is everyone involved in those funny little mixups not a real gay anymore? hell, what about gay people in the closet who can't quite accept their attraction to their own gender yet but their "type" of the "appropriate" gender is effeminate guys/tomboys? if someone wants to enter the gay identity do they absolutely HAVE to renounce all past attraction to the "opposite" gender as fake? why? says who? why would it not be enough to say "i'm significantly happier and feel more natural embracing attraction to, and being with, my own gender"?

like yeah, personally, i do deem the attraction that i used to think i had for women as fake. but i'm an incredibly self-aware and self-analytical and generally In My Head person. i can look in there and see the throughline and know the exact reason i thought i liked girls, and hell, i can even remember the conscious thoughts i had where i was forcing myself to feel it. but i do NOT expect everyone to be the same?? like that would be insane. if everyone was as self-aware as me, specifically. that's not healthy lol.

but anyway, on that same vein, repression and the closet are seriously powerful things. there may have been a layer of conscious attempt to be masculine in the mix, but when i was 16 and searching for things to appreciate in girls' appearances and, because i was trying so hard, sometimes finding them, and acheiving that abstract feeling of attraction that i was looking for... would it really be SO insane if i now wanted to say that yes, i have been attracted to women, and i just got over it?

when i say that i'm not attracted to women now, that doesn't even mean that i have never been attracted to a single woman. it means that womanhood and femininity does not inherently appeal to me. that's where "exceptions" come in - it's literally not that deep. it's when you recognize that you're feeling something, and maybe you're unsure but it seems at least attraction-adjacent, but it's not related to the prerequisite of gender that's usually on your capacity for attraction; it's in spite of it. i have to imagine that the majority of the time when this happens, it's because the person is in fact somewhat androgynous, or some part of you percieved this person as the gender you do like when you weren't conscious of it, or there's some aspect of their appearance that has the right gendered "energy" to you. and sometimes people just look really fucking interesting, or people are just excpetionally beautiful, and it hits you so hard that it seems like attraction but you're really just in a brief moment of awe! sometimes you just enter the cosmic soup for a second!

and feeling superior about having never had this happen to you is... well, it's just that, isn't it? it's purely about feeling superior. i honestly don't even believe that it's truly the case for that one person. i feel like the internal need to say shit like that has got to come from an insecurity about the fact that you're not that "true homosexual" that you're claiming deserves to never be implied to have things in common with all other gay people.

furthermore... the notion of it being homophobic to identify as gay when you're "not 100% internally homosexual"? well i mean obviously that's the terf shit. it's the braindead idea that other people's identities take anything away from you. as if anyone actually identifies as gay "when they're actually bi" just for fun and not because their "straight" attraction is extremely incidental and/or just does not preclude actually acting on it... like duh, lol. and even if it was for fun, it literally still takes nothing. it's a completely imaginary danger.

and it's so batshit in particular bc going out of your way to harass other gay people and tell them they're not gay is objectively the fucking homophobic thing??? like how on earth do you see yourself as the better person here. christ lol

#mine #not polls

[mikoriin]

happy holidays!! I would love to hear about the magical girl outfits of the affinity cast if you'd like to talk about any of their designs !

HI!!! happy holidays!! sorry im getting to this so late, i had to actually get colored examples of all the kids in their magical outfits LOL (HOWEVER everett will not be included in this list simply because he does not yet have a finished character sheet AND i need to redesign his magical outfit)

so, we'll start with our leader and protagonist, Sinie!

her color is white. i dont see very many "white" themed leaders in mg genres, so i wanted her to be represented by the color of innocence and purity because that is what sinie represents. she's definitely my usagi, my steven, my luz.

for her design, i wanted something simple yet fluffy to show her childish nature. i have thought about powerup versions of their outfits, but im not sure how to incorporate it yet so i havent even began to think about their designs haha

next we have agitha! her outfit actually resembles pajamas, her dress is like a victorian nightgown and shes got the little shawl to go with it. everything is so soft anf pastel it just feels like a comfy outfit. this wasnt intentional, but i think it fits with her powers since her magic is centered around dreams.

she's the purple magical girl! though, its a little more pastel than what we usually see i think.

csilla is blue!! i adjusted some of her colors from the first colored design i had. it felt a little too plain being all one color haha. but she sort of looks like a knight and, again it wasnt intentional, but if im thinking about it she rly is the knight sort of character. she fights to protect her friends and herself, but she also is righteous and is a good strategist.

so daren was OBVIOUSLY red in my mind because hes the tank, the muscle, and also another good strategist. his fighting style is more hands on since he uses his fists and legs and so i thought fire would fit to be his power. i have a lot of cool ideas for his fighting style i just rly need to study shounen manga to get them down hahaha

i wanted their design to be androgynous while still being magical girl esque, so i gave him the tall heeled boots however still keeping a sort of sleek, form fitting silhouette. added some more traditionally feminine aspects of clothing like the puffed sleeves, however put in some classic masculine elements such as the tailcoat and pants. im very proud of his design!

elise is pink! of course!! (sinie is jealous) she has the power to purify dark energy. very classic magical girl!

i wanted her design to be big and poofy and girly. but also with the boob window because.....idk its cute lolol

and lastly heather!! i didnt have it in me to do her character sheet atm but i rly wanted to answer this 😩😩 but luckily i had a colored example of her magical outfit!

she is green! very fitting for the pretty, elegant, smart heather. i wanted her design to be faithful to her faith, but still have the feminine magical girl aesthetic! i think she looks very pretty hehe

thank you for asking this was very fun!!!

#ocs #affinity #sinie #agitha #csilla #daren #elise #heather #magical girl #original story #original characters #artists on tumblr #small artist #doots

[imrinababy]

𝙰𝚍𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚗𝚗𝚎 𝚁𝚢𝚍𝚎𝚛 [𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚢/𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚖]

Get to know them below!

this has been sitting in my drafts + yes, you’ve seen this sim on my account like 3 posts down but those screenshots were from months ago & since I had no one to really share them with, I’d just take a quick screenshot of my screen to drag + drop into a convo but now I get to yap away here. 😎 They also got a small revamp (hehe)!! I’ll probably make little (lol) posts like this from time to giving backstories to some of my sims? idk, I always come up with a little story as I make them because I feel like you can kinda get a feel for them as you see how they’d “express themselves” through makeup or fashion. anyways enough of me yapping here, I’ll introduce you to Adrienne now.

𝙽𝚊𝚖𝚎: 𝙰𝚍𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚗𝚗𝚎 𝙻𝚒𝚕𝚢 𝚁𝚢𝚍𝚎𝚛

𝙰𝚐𝚎: 𝟸𝟷

𝙱𝚒𝚛𝚝𝚑𝚍𝚊𝚢: 𝟹.𝟷𝟽 ♓︎

𝙵𝚊𝚟𝚘𝚛𝚒𝚝𝚎 𝙲𝚘𝚕𝚘𝚛: 𝚆𝚑𝚒𝚝𝚎

𝙶𝚎𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚛: 𝙶𝚎𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚛-𝚏𝚕𝚞𝚒𝚍/ 𝙽𝚘𝚗𝚋𝚒𝚗𝚊𝚛𝚢

𝚂𝚎𝚡𝚞𝚊𝚕𝚒𝚝𝚢: 𝙿𝚊𝚗𝚜𝚎𝚡𝚞𝚊𝚕

𝚁𝚎𝚕𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜𝚑𝚒𝚙 𝚂𝚝𝚊𝚝𝚞𝚜: 𝚂𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚕𝚎

Adrienne is a freshly 21 year old, openly queer and business oriented person. They have periods where they present themselves more masculine or androgynous but they’re currently in their hyper-feminine era. They're a very ambitious but cheerful person, always the first to hype you up when you need it.

They consider themselves as “a human that isn’t limited by boundaries created by mankind” and refuse to use a set gender identity to refer to themselves as so they’ll use gender-fluid/ nonbinary interchangeably to avoid feeling chained to a particular identity. They’re the biggest believer in “You don’t have to explain yourself to anyone or anything, including yourself. Do what makes you happy, our time is limited. Love to live your life.”

They just got out of a two year long relationship with an ex-partner who wasn't very supportive of their gender identity or the way they'd express themselves. "Since I don't set limitations for myself gender wise, I don't mind if people call me "she" from time to time but he'd go out of his way to only refer to me by those pronouns or go out of his way to make it known that I was only a "girl/ woman" in his eyes. Although I had a lot of love for him at some point in time, he was no longer someone I could say I aligned with." They don't have a set preferences for their "ideal type" but gravitate to people who have very similar desires or goals as they do. They're very motivated to reach the goals they set for themselves and heavily desire to be with someone who can match that energy. They are very attracted to the way certain people carry themselves.

They have a HUGE passion for baking & cooking. It’s the best way they express their affection. Sure, they’ll say “I love you” or verbally express anything anything else but their skills in the kitchen is the best way they’ll respond to anything. Going through a breakup? Here’s your favorite type of cookie made especially catered with your tastes in mind. Stressed about school? Here’s a homemade meal with all your favorite ingredients! It’s your birthday?? Well hope you enjoy a day full of taste testing a bunch of dishes made especially for you to try and enjoy. Their dream is to open up a bakery and/or a restaurant to share their skills with the world.

Although they can say they have a support home life, it’s definitely far from perfect. They have an older sister (around the age of 29/30) that they lost contact with at a young age. She "disappeared" from Adrienne's life when they were 7/8 years old & their parents were going through a divorce. Their sister went with their mom and they stayed with their dad. Their mom passed 3-4 years after the split so no one really has heard anything from their sister since. They hate when anyone refers to them as “Lily” but have the fondest memories of their older sister calling them that. Their Dad is kind of hesitant to talk about the topic and avoids it as much as possible but that's made it so that hes more understanding + supportive of Adrienne even if he doesn't necessarily agree with something.

Adrienne's Outfits

Adrienne's style is whatever they think looks great on them. They're currently in their hyper-feminine era so theyre experimenting a lot with new dresses, makeup, hair etc. but they see makeup more as an artistic expression so even when presenting more masc, they still love adding a touch of makeup to themselves.

Everyday

Formal

Party

Sleepwear

Swimwear

Activewear

Hot Weather

Cold Weather

(tbh i was the least confident about this one so i might come redo it and edit this later but for now its staying this)

#my sims #the sims community #simblr #the sims 4 #sims 4 #sims 4 screenshots #sims 4 cc #the sims #sims community #the sims custom content #the sims cc #ts4 #ts4 simblr #ts4 legacy #ts4 simbrl #ts4cc #simspo

[vertigoblockbuster]

Info Dump: Ardra Nakshatra

In vedic astrology, Rudra is the ruling deity of Ardra nakshatra, the 6th lunar mansion in the Hindu zodiacal system. Rudra is a form of Lord Shiva the Destroyer. Within Hinduism Shiva is one of three principle deities, the other two being Lord Vishnu and Lord Brahma. In extremely simple terms, Brahma is the creator of the universe, Vishnu is the preserver of it, and Shiva destroys it to recreate a new universe.

Rudra is very different from the other gods. Rather than desiring nice clothing and adornments, Rudra prefers to wear animal skin and tree bark. A graveyard is his preferred dwelling place over a peaceful home. He doesn't wash or cut his hair and searches for a deeper meaning that he values above all earthly comforts. One who has Rudra nakshatras (Ardra, Mula, and the two Bhadrapadas) prevalent in their birth chart has the power to unleash their anger onto untrue, impure things. Lies, harmful people, and corrupt institutions are the types of animals Rudra hunts. Evil is washed away by his storms and a clean slate is made available for good things to manifest.

Shiva is eternal and therefore is not literally "born," instead he is an embodiment of an energy that existed in Brahma first. The story of Rudra's "birth" from Brahma goes like this: Brahma worked hard to create beings to help him in forming the universe. When they disobeyed him because they did not want to mingle with lower earthly things, Brahma understood their reasoning but was simultaneously furious at their disobedience. His rage built up between his eyes (think of how we scrunch our faces when we become angry) and when he pulled it out of his head it took the form of a howling baby that was purple and androgynous, Rudra.

To help Brahma in his creation of the universe, Rudra was instructed to separate his male and female forms and make eleven copies of himself so that they could reproduce together. These beings formed from Brahma's fury were full of anger and threatened to destroy the world that he was attempting to create. Brahma instructed Rudra to control his anger by meditating. Rudra threw himself into yoga to conquer his mind and become peaceful. Brahma was pleased with the work that Rudra had done on himself and renamed him Shiva. Literally translated, Rudra means the "howler" or the "most frightening one" while Shiva means "calm" or "benevolent." Rudra's self-mastery through yoga is why he is revered as one of the original masters of the practice, another being Brahma. Rudra is perhaps a more notable yogic master because of the inner rage he had to conquer within himself. His path to self-control was more challenging because he is the embodiment of Brahma's anger.

When used unhealthily, this destructive force is inflicted on innocent people and things around the native with Rudra influencing their chart. It can also be turned inward by the native onto themselves. Here we can see the archetype of the tortured bad boy or the tragic bad girl. No superficiality is tolerated (at least not comfortably) at this point in the zodiac and must be destroyed, including one's own character.

Some of the symbology associated with Ardra includes the color green (Ardra translating to mean moist one or fresh one), a jewel, a human head and a teardrop. The color green reminds us of the rich landscape of a forest after a storm. After a violent downpour the plant life is hydrated, nourished, and rejuvenated. Here is a reminder that storms, while frightening experiences best avoided from a superficial standpoint, are not only beautiful on a deeper level but necessary for growth. This same principle can easily be extended to human beings and is the major lesson we learn from Ardra nakshatra: Anger is not bad. We need anger. The challenge is directing it properly.

The symbol of the jewel evokes ideas of the formation of diamonds. It is commonly known that tremendous heat and pressure are required to form diamonds, and that they are held around the world to be extremely valuable. Again, we are brought back to the idea of using our turbulent, angry emotions (think of the heat and pressure required for a diamond to form) as tools to create a life that we truly value (the diamond itself).

The human head and teardrop are associated with Ardra because it is a nakshatra of intellect, deep reflection, and also of anguish and suffering. Crying has been said to be a remedy for those with prominent Ardra placements in their chart because it releases pent up emotions. After crying we are left with a clean emotional slate and there is now space to recreate ourselves.

-----------------

I credit Vic Dicara for the information on the story of Rudra/Shiva. Please check out his YouTube channel Vic Dicara's Astrology if you are interested in learning about vedic astrology.

#astrology #vedic astrology #ardra #nakshatras

[flyin-shark]

"Cishet probably". The words of a man who is yet to learn that gender is a circus and clowns can be hot.

Or what I mean is more like.... That's really interesting in a sense, as soneone who is ambiguous/not caring on all levels, I really wanna study the anatomy of the cishet experience. I can't figure it out. Is it like. If you see a person your ability to be attracted to them depends on your current knowledge of their gender? So you could see a person and assume they are a woman, so then you are into them, but then they might turn out not to identify as a woman, and that is a turn-off?

And the other way around, maybe you meet someone and assume they're a guy so it doesn't enter your mind that they could be hot, but then you learn that they are a woman, and then it becomes an option?

I'm really not trying to be offensive so I'm so sorry if I am. I'm just super curious, as a person who was never able to conceptualize gender in myself or others very well. I find attraction complicated as is, and imagining adding the matrix of gender into it is like... Galaxy brain woah h o w ?

Uh. Anyways, good vibes.

(Came to think of it cuz you say you're a top/into bottoms. And like certainly the top/bottom dichotomy transcends gender, but at the same time, I wonder what the "communication" is in there in a cishet context? Does it mean "I don't like getting penetrated by a partner", or is it more about "top energy". And if yes, what is "top energy" in a cishet context?

I really hope I'm not coming across as rude, I'm literally just super curious about people who ID as cishet, so when I run into someone who seems approachable I turn into 12 questions with ....

Also this also is related to the fact that I'm like a dude but in a girl way you feel? Like most people attracted to me are also attached to gnc women, but also if you need to call me 'her' to get off, we probably won't vibe, and as a general rule I do avoid having sex with cishet guys bc if their attraction is somehow contingent on internal misgendering of me, it's awkward. But I'm trying to figure out how that works. )

Sorry I'll stop asking now. I'll get my ND ass under control.

Yes to your first three questions.

So I call myself cishet because first I’m fairly sure that I’m not trans. I feel like a man, whatever that means. I get what I think is a sense of euphoria from doing certain “masculine” things (wearing suits, fixing things, etc.). I don’t like the idea of me wearing a skirt of other typically feminine clothing. I don’t like when people use feminine versions of my name and pronouns that aren’t he/him for me. In all aspects I can think of I’m a man.

As for the hetero part I know I like women. I always have as far as I can remember. I’ve never had attraction to men. Although in the past few years with learning about trans and nb people I’ve had to think more about it. I used to be transphobic in the sense that while I respected pronouns and names I wouldn’t accept that people were their something other than their assigned gender. After learning about the science behind sex and the social dynamics of gender I now fully accept trans and enby peeps. But that means reconsidering what I like about women and don’t like about men.

I’ve seen femboys that I’ve mistaken for women and been attracted to them. After finding out they were boys i was confused but I just wrote it off and didn’t think about it. I saw a lot of enbies that looked more masc or fem and I was attracted to them if I thought they were afab. But then I saw some enbies that were really androgynous and was really confused again. I learned that you can’t tell if someone is a man or woman or other just by looking at them. It’s possible I’m just attracted to femininity and not women specifically. But also women with muscles are hot.

Answering your question about tops and bottoms. After spending time in queer spaces I realized just how boring most cishet relationships are both romantically and sexually. The top, dom, and giver roles, etc are all dumped on the man while the bottom, sub, and receiver roles are all given to the woman. I think most cishets don’t even differentiate between the roles.

My brain still doesn’t comprehend what it’s like to be “a dude in a girl way” or anything similar to that. Like I respect you as a person I just don’t understand how that works. It seems like a contradiction at first but I know boy and girl aren’t opposites.

Sorry for taking so long to respond to this but I wanted to give you some good answers.

#long post #shark sayin stuff #I hope this answers all your questions :3 #dm or ask me if you have more :3

[mangle-my-mind]

Todd Haynes on Velvet Goldmine and Fandom (and Gender, and Yaoi, and Slash Fic)

Source: "Something that is Dangerous and Arousing and Transgressive: An Interview with Todd Haynes," Julia Leyda.

Edits and emphases my own :) The whole interview is fascinating, and while I kept most of the Velvet Goldmine stuff in this post, there are more bits to read about it, as well as conversation around Todd Haynes' other films. This is gonna be a really long post, with screencaps throughout, so find it below the cut!

JL: You've done several movies that are very clearly woman's films, but the movie that I am most fascinated with in terms of gender is Velvet Goldmine, which is not usually interpreted in that context.

TH: No, except it's probably gotten the strongest female fan base of any of my films. And what's wonderful for me is to see new generations of young women, even as we think we progress as a society and there are new options available to each new generation that seem to be catering to that market more acutely, still Velvet Goldmine offers that market something that they’re not getting elsewhere. I always love it when girls come up to me at festivals and that’s the one, that’s the movie that really turned them around.

JL: I’m interested in how you use the trope of playing with dolls in Superstar and Velvet Goldmine as a way to figure gender, embodiment, desire, identification. You said in an interview that playing with dolls is what you’re doing in Velvet Goldmine, using it as a metaphor for the filmmaking process, to play with the characters of the idols more than making an actual biopic about bisexual pop stars. So what about the female characters in Velvet Goldmine? Fans, rock and roll girls like Mandy — talk a bit about them.

TH: Interesting question... I don’t know if [the role of the rock-n-roll girl and the role of Angela Bowie in glam] relates directly to doll-playing except that it really might be the last time that you see an active female figure freely utilizing artificial terms of self-expression and persona in an unembarrassed, unabashed, almost radical way. That was in a way the fascinating counterpart to the more aloof, silent, objectified figure that Bowie assumed as Ziggy Stardust. Of course, there was also that hardcore influence from the American music that he loved — the Stooges, the MC5, and the Velvet Underground and Lou Reed — as the final ingredient to give it that kind of duality, the cross between English musical traditions and this American hardcore, a direct assault. He needed both of those, but there was still a kind of passivity and object-ness of that figure that seemed more quiet, and more comfortable being an image, an idealized beautiful façade that people could project onto; whereas Angela Bowie was active, pulling the strings and moving the levers — in that way, I think, making him up so that he was the doll that she was playing with. So a lot of that energy and that fire and fearlessness I think could be attributed to her.

JL: In the doll-playing scene in Velvet Goldmine, the girls are like Mandy, manipulating them and fantasizing about them. So that trope of little girls playing with dolls scene really gets at the way the movie is about bisexuality and a kind of less bordered sexual identity, that is based in play, in fantasy —

TH: — is fluid, is mutable, is conducive to all kinds of voices and all kinds of players pulling the strings. But one thing that Velvet Goldmine kind of misses is how strongly and passionately young women were the driving desiring consumers of this very unique moment in popular culture history. That has continued, too: the androgynous male object is something that still attracts a really passionate, active female spectatorship. That’s so fascinating to me, and you can see it played out in so many different ways: the tradition of the Japanese comics of the ’70s, what’s it called again?

JL: The subgenre of manga with the boy lovers and its girl fans, yaoi.

TH: Exactly. The boy lovers and the girl fans, really directed at girl consumers, and it’s this androgynous, starry-eyed princes and pretty boys who have sparkly eyes for each other.

JL: I wondered if you were aware of yaoi or not. When I was working on a conference paper about the girl fans in Velvet Goldmine some of my colleagues said, Hey that’s just like yaoi! And I said, Wow, it really is, but I have no idea if that’s part of what he was thinking or if it’s just a coincidental, cross-cultural parallel.

TH: It was a tangent that I learned about in the process of research, but I don’t remember when exactly. I was certainly aware of how there was a particular Japanese following with a passionate attachment to the Bowie phenomenon, glam rock, T. Rex; Japan made up a major part of their market. But I think it’s an interesting counter-argument to the classic Laura Mulvey idea of a limited female spectatorship and if anything it only further underscores — although I think this is all embedded in that, and though I haven’t read those articles in some years — that marginalized subjects, such as gay subjects and women, have to find a more dexterous and nuanced way of reading culture and finding their way into all kinds of content that is not designed for them. I think there’s this ability to transform and to enter into all kinds of different subject positions of which this is one amazing and fascinating example: the glam rock thing with young girls’ driving interest in it.

JL: When I was a teenager I was a huge Bowie fan, and my mother was confused because I was always trying to look like Bowie; she would say, “You’re attracted to him, you have a crush on him, why do you want to look like him? When I was younger I loved Jean-Paul Belmondo, but I didn’t want to look like him.” But in the ’70s, and in my case the ’80s, and still today I think, girls of all sexual orientations experience that overlapping between desire and identification — it’s there in the Arthur character, too, but I’m thinking of in the opening sequence with the glam girls rampaging.

TH: Right, they’re absolutely rampaging, terrorizing the town in utter desire. And we all know that the passion that we see displayed there, the intensely sexual display of female spectatorship probably started with Valentino, Sinatra, the Beatles, and Elvis.

JL: It’s almost hysterical.

TH: Yes. There was in these cases an androgynous, feminine element to the actual performance; in a way, just for the star to be up on stage, just to be objectified, is to arguably be feminized. These artists in their unique and shaded ways capitalized on that, and the result among female spectators is something that society is still startled by: that radical emotional response that it engenders... Each generation has its own variant on that. It does call into question all sorts of assumptions about opposites attracting, the whole simplistic reductive ideas of what drives desire —

JL: — and the borders of identity.

TH: Yes, and the female subjects, spectators, consumers, maybe because they’ve had to learn how to occupy different subject positions in dominant patriarchal culture, have revealed the ways that desiring has narcissistic or self-reflexive aspects. On the other hand, maybe male spectatorship has just been so much more catered to and delineated in solid terms, and thus hasn’t been able to explore the margins as thoroughly, but women and gay people and African Americans, for example, all have to find different ways of entering mainstream cultural production.

JL: I love that the girls with the dolls in Velvet Goldmine are storytellers, they are controlling the narrative, in a sense, and that you say that that’s what you were doing as a director.

TH: I think that’s how we all begin to externalize our desires: through storytelling. Dolls are a tool that lends itself to that; they are supposedly made for little girls, and I loved dolls when I was a kid. The Barbie doll became a multiply useful subject in the Karen Carpenter film, and that was the internal nod that I was making in Velvet Goldmine, but it was so relevant it didn’t feel like a detour or a private joke — it felt like it was getting to the core of the intense effect that is felt by these kinds of characters in popular culture. That free-floating desire in the little boy-romance that the little girls are constructing is about as sweet and tender as anything in the film.

JL: That kind of storytelling, the freedom in play, helps the characters, but also the rest of us, decide who we are and how we want to tell our own stories.

TH: It’s the story and the engine of the film. It is really the fan’s point of view — the Arthur character, obviously — but it’s really the theme and the whole motor of it. I always knew I wasn’t really interested in getting inside the closed doors of these famous subjects and that’s why a fictionalization of this unique period made sense. We all already fictionalize and fill in and fantasize. And we see it too in the whole slash fiction phenomenon, which I didn’t even know about until Velvet Goldmine, and in which Velvet Goldmine has itself become a category.

JL: That’s the cool thing about Velvet Goldmine — it is itself a sort of slash fiction, and there’s this ongoing spin-off slash fiction community carrying the stories forward — it’s a perfect loop.

TH: Yes. To ignite that little flame that makes people want to respond actively and creatively and participate. It reminds me of a girl… I was scared of Bowie when I was in junior high school, and I remember I was aware of him, but it was all just too freaky. There was a girl in a lip sync show in seventh grade who picked his song “Changes.” She was this beautiful girl and she imitated him, as many girls did, right, because he was so pretty... [S]he just did the perfect lightning bolt like Aladdin Sane, and she got her hair just right — I forgot if she wore a wig. But she performed “Changes,” and I remember hearing and thinking, “Oh, this isn’t so scary . . .” because I expected it to be really hardcore music and I would be put off by it. But it was so pretty.

JL: So she turned you on to Bowie.

TH: She really helped...

JL: I’m trying not to let my brain explode with that idea! I remember that scene in Velvet Goldmine where they’re reporting on the news, saying something like, “Girls everywhere are wearing glitter makeup,” and that conveyed the society’s sense of fear, of what are all those girls up to? The idea that they’re going to need to be controlled again somehow because they’re getting a little too weird or too powerful.

TH: The glitter girls, as they were sometimes called, especially the LA version of the glitter girls, that’s another thing I really remember from junior high. As I read later when I studied this period, they were a force to be reckoned with — extremely precocious, among some of the youngest, most adventurous and not violent, but persevering, fearless, active fans. They peopled the Rodney Bingenheimer English Club on Sunset Boulevard —

JL: Like the Runaways.

TH: Yes, they gave birth to the Runaways. I think it was one of those girls who ended up in Roman Polanski’s house, who was fifteen or however old she was, but that’s why it’s very hard to examine that infringement outside of its cultural context and what was happening at the time in Los Angeles. Glitter girls scared the shit out of me when I was a kid — they were tough, and girls were already ahead of boys at that age, but they were miles ahead. It was intense. I can absolutely picture those kinds of girls, and they were intense, in their platform shoes and glitter makeup.

JL: With Arthur, I thought you did such a great job developing that character as a kind of giddy, exuberant, awkward young guy. You’ve said that Velvet Goldmine was your most affirmative film, even though the ’80s scenes are so dark, it provides the character of Arthur with this memory to cherish even in the middle of the awful ’80s.

TH: Totally. I don’t know if there’s a more joyful moment in any of my movies than that little passage that I’ve been showing as a clip in a couple of festivals and retrospectives of Arthur getting the record, and making his brother agree to lend him the money taking it home, opening it up, and that cherished —

JL: Fetishized!

TH: — fetishized record. And then he leaves the house, stashing his coat and just prancing proudly with his badges down the street with the song playing, and yet still being met with this higher echelon of socially superior kids who look down on him, and the pretty boy who scowls at him for his presumption to even be in their company. But still I think every kid has some version of that: his awkwardness, his passion, his vulnerability, and his strength, too, are all embodied in that ability to fall in love.

That beautiful sequence ends with him turning the page one more time to the page with the image of Curt and Brian kissing. And I remember feeling that, a kind of recoiling, confusion — like it’s tapping something exact, absolutely precise, but just too many membranes down to be able to be freed up, able to be voiced or affirmed. But it’s something you’re bookmarking for the future, that feeling you’re going to return to when you have a little more strength, a little more perspective. It’s touching something that you know you’re going to have to get back to because it’s something that is dangerous and arousing and transgressive. Christian's performance is so amazing because that sequence starts with him in the classroom, where he really looks all of a sudden like he’s fourteen years old, with his ruddy cheeks —

JL: — and his really bad bangs. I identified with him utterly and painfully in that scene. And his flailing dancing scene. My God, that character is so beautiful.

TH: He did such a beautiful job. He really was so committed and so profoundly inside that guy. I remember when we wrapped and he put away the Arthur clothes and he came back and said, “I just put away the Arthur clothes and cried a little bit.” And I don’t know if I cried but I sure felt like I could’ve. I think despite all the beautiful, fancy guys in that movie, I think my heart belonged to Arthur.

JL: Of course, because Arthur’s us.

TH: He is.

JL: When he takes that coat off and starts walking down the street it’s just: yes! We were all there. I like the way that film gives a few different positions over to that kind of fandom: audience member, fan, young person who’s still working things out, still trying to figure out who they are, and who they want, and who they want to be. The girls as well as Arthur.

TH: It’s also why the whole package of bisexuality, a kind of performative, made-up, dressed-up sense of identity and self, and coupled with this sense of being extraterrestrial, speaks so directly to adolescent instability and to that moment of uncertainty. It couldn’t have been a more total package for the mutability of that time, touching all the nerves and also the freedoms that dressing up allows you, and imagining different kinds of love objects that aren’t necessarily the ones you’re supposed to have. But even that is blurry, unfixed.

JL: Tommy Stone’s star image shows the other side of that dressing-up, right? If you can change yourself that radically, you can also change yourself into a horrible, plastic thing.

TH: Right, and a kind of converse example. The female fan who comes up to Arthur in that final scene at the bar who is so ecstatic about Tommy Stone because that’s all that generation has. That’s what they got — it’s not their fault that the same desire, the same need for something special is expressed, but it’s just not radical, or progressive, or culture-changing. But it’s what they’ve got, and I didn’t want to blame them because they are part of a culture that had to clamp down around categories once again, resume control of those categories that were seeping into each other so surprisingly for a brief time.

JL: Exactly. That limited world that she inhabits and Arthur’s wistful smile as he gives her the press pass, seeing her giddiness.

TH: Just as the emerald pin is the ultimate token of passing on heritages and opportunities or insights or ways of radically inverting a person’s destined experience. That’s how that scene is framed with him passing on the press pass to her and Curt passing on the pin to Arthur. There’s a nice sense of camaraderie among generations and different stations.

#velvet goldmine #25yearsofvelvetgoldmine #velvetgoldmine25th

[madtomedgar]

jgy and wwx genderbend thoughts pls :D

@stripedroseandsketchpads is the authority on f!Wei Wuxian, frankly. Just go read everything she's written on it.

f!Wei Wuxian is androgynous, but in that way where you're not sure if she's gay or just plays sports, during the CR arc. She grows into her butchitude as the Yiling Laozu. A lot of Wei Wuxian's Thing is that she is an abject failure at being a girl, and instead of beating herself up about this and trying and failing to conform, she leans into it like "haha aren't i so horrible haha watch this." I like Wei Wuxian with endometriosis where like. She managed it using her core, it was fine. And then no core. But hey, look at all of this excessive yin energy her body is spewing! look at all this thick black blood that is extra good for doing demonic cultivation! yeah ok she's like. in pain all the time or whatever but it's fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine that's what booze is for!

She and Jiang Cheng have a weird thing for multiple reasons because like. There's the looming possibility that the Jiang parents will betroth them, and also it's kind of extra embarrassing that this girl is showing up Jiang Cheng and it's not Madam Yu's daughter!

But. Yeah. Canon Wei Wuxian has some gender non-conformity fun going on with the like. "I gave birth to this child" and the way he acts with Lan Wangji. So, f!Wei Wuxian should also have some gender fuckery along those lines.

And now, f!Jin Guangyao, my beloved. The best character. 100/10. She. Unfortunately I have so many thoughts about her but they aren't... consistent. Like. There are multiple f!Jin Guangyao's in my head. In some, she's a very... proper lady but in that like. sexless way. In some she is very gender ambiguous in that like. Beautiful Youth way, and has at different times cross-dressed and presented herself as a man. In every version though, she strives to present herself as sexless but everyone reads whatever sexuality they want onto her and she HATES it.

There needs to be a whiff of gender failure about her, despite, or perhaps because of, intense efforts to be perfect. A lot of this, for her, comes out in her failure to have more than one kid (she makes sure to lose them all after the first one, which she was too late on), and that one kid dying young, and her... ok look. I think f!Jin Guangyao is a really bad mom in that she, despite her best efforts, wants nothing to do with her son (carrying and then having to mother a baby she knows is an incest baby while Qin Su is So Happy. Yikes!). She hates herself for it because her mother was so good. Yeah.

She is I think more ruthless than in canon in some ways, her hands are dirtier. I think f!Jin Guangyao does kill Rusong, and I love that for her. I also like it if she kills Qin Su (a man, because this isn't a canon with marriage equality sorry). And like. She hates herself for it and grieves them but she does it.Honestly the idea of f!Jin Guangyao first occurred to me during the Guanyin Temple scene where Jin Guangyao and Lan Xichen are "discussing" Qin Su and Lan Xichen goes "what do you mean you had no choice, it was your marriage," because. Imagine. F!Jin Guangyao just. Looking back at that like. Are you for real right now. But yeah because she would have even less power, she would actually wind up doing a lot of the things Jin Guangyao is accused of but didn't do, or had mitigating stuff for (like not sleeping with Qin Su. Much harder if it's the wife who has the information there). The whole Thing with Jin Guangshan making Jin Guangyao be involved, even peripherally, in his brothel escapades, is so much worse if Jin Guangyao is a woman, and the way she kills Jin Guangshan is... so so so good. Clytemnestra and Medea and Orestes are giving her a standing ovation. I do think she has a like... deep-seated envy and resentment of men for their social position, the power they wield, the casual violence and humiliation they subject women (her) to.

Outwardly she is extremely poised, but almost no one would call her sweet. She's very nice, and very helpful, and frighteningly competent, but she isn't warm. She is good at being like. Vaguely threatening and frightening but in a very... like she hasn't actually done anything but smile and wish you a pleasant journey. But you get the Feeling that you should maybe back down about whatever before you wake up in 17 different dumpsters, yknow. In a way that canon Jin Guangyao doesn't... have to quite as much. If that makes sense.

Lately I have fallen in love with the idea of her adopting the official's cap (slightly fancier) specifically as chief cultivator as a like. Deliberately gendered power-symbol, a la Queen Elizabeth I signing her name Elizabeth Rex (rather than Regina) and calling herself a king or a prince. Oh, and because in any f!Jin Guangyao au Lan Xichen is also a woman, if anyone even looks at her wrong, but especially if any man makes untoward anything at Lan Xichen, he winds up dead and you can't prove a thing :). I love her.

#untamed stuff #shameless jiggy apologism #long post #rule 63

[dontjinxx]

so you asked for team star questions or something. i want to know your opinions and/or headcanons on Eri

My opinion on Eri is that she’s wildly underrated and she’s baby to me !! ok here’s some hcs

I definitely hc her as autistic with social anxiety . I think she just has that vibe mostly lol as a person with both . I think she thrives around people who understand her, don’t judge her, and she’s comfortable around . otherwise she tends to be awkward around people .

She seems to be a sensitive soul despite it all and from what I saw in the game, blames herself for things going wrong . She puts a lot of pressure on herself to be the protector of the group, to be a good star boss, to battle well, to support her friends . I think she’s a little socially awkward outside of her friends and can either come off as distant/aggressive or ‘strange’ . she isn’t an aggressive at all - she’s actually very gentle, she just has a big love for her friends and a big desire to protect people. She protects people to the point where she doesn’t take care of herself (I’m pretty sure this is mentioned in canon) but she pushes herself way too hard and is hard on herself for so much as taking a break . I think the bullying she endured likely took a hit on her confidence and also put the fear in her that if she didn’t protect people, they’d be hurt.

I think Eri definitely had protective instincts her entire life, but the bullying she went through really made her close ranks around her loved ones. I think that really amplified her need to keep people safe at the cost of herself . Being picked on made her feel worthless and like she wasn’t worthy of being protected or even being taken care of, so instead she puts her all into make sure everyone else is ok . I think she has this overarching anxiety that if she rests for even a moment, someone she loves will get hurt, if that happens, she saddles herself with the blame. She asks herself why she wasn’t there or why she didn’t do more, but in the end, sometimes people just get hurt .

Also I hc she has several siblings and that’s another place her protective instinct comes from . she has eldest sister energy to me .

also I hc her as the second youngest member of team star after ortega (she’s still significantly older than him) only because it’s goofy and I genuinely like it . I def see why people would hc as one of if not the oldest, but I also kinda see her as this girl who’s younger than she looks who forced herself to grow up .

after the events of the game I like to think she begins entering wrestling competitions and Star cheers for her the loudest .

I think she’s a little non-binary . She’s a girl but in a very loose sense I think . she doesn’t mind pronouns too much she just prefers feminine or androgynous ones . I don’t think she likes masc pronouns/terms . Probably a demigirl .

#pokemon sv #team star #jinxx hcs #eri pokemon

[auxiliarydetective]

Who has the biggest Slay™? Poll number 1

Congratulations, you have voted on who will go through the horrors (you have voted, right???) - that means it's now time for the fun part of the Halloween Challenge: Costumes! As usual, I'm an indecisive little gremlin and so I shall now present you with the ideas my brain has come up with.

My beloved judges of style, please decide in the following pageant, based on... How fitting are the costumes? And of course... the funnies. Bonus for style points.

Day Twenty-Eight: Let’s Be Weird Together

We all know of an iconic squad that so many people are just dying to be a part of. Well, it’s your ocs and their friends chance! Day 28 is group costumes!

THE SECURITY/ENGINEERING CHAOS BUNCH

Gordon Malloy as Han Solo (he gets to be the cool one for once <3)

John LaMarr as Lando Calrissian (ladies' man much?)

Alara Kitan as Leia Organa (girl power dot com)

Raevyn Maumahara as Luke Skywalker (she gets to pass off her baton as a lightsaber, I mean, come on now)

THE A-TEAM

Hannibal as Egon Spengler (aka only braincell)

Face as Peter Venkman (the ladies' man, except a more successful one than Venkman is)

Murdock as Ray Stantz (autistic swag - he has a Slimer plushy that he carries with him)

B.A. as Winston Zeddemore nobody (he insists that he didn't agree to this nonsense and only participates once they let him cut off the sleeves on his flightsuit but he secretly enjoys dressing up)

Kit as Gozer (androgynous as heck, has declared war on gender)

THE DYSFUNCTIONAL FAMILY

Hogan as Athena (big brain strategy energy)

Newkirk as Hermes (god of thieves)

LeBeau as Demeter (goddess of harvest who is known to become pissed if someone messes with her family)

Carter as Hephaistos (Carter is a blacksmith, except he uses chemicals that go boom in whatever he forges, which creates fire, which Hephaistos is also the god of)

Kinch as Hestia (he is mama bear, period)

Vicky as Aphrodite (her faceclaim is Marilyn Monroe, she is beautiful as all hell - also a known seductress)

THE STRAW HAT PIRATES

Monkey D. Luffy as Mario (he... he IS Mario, okay? Fun guy, red color theme...)

Roronoa Zoro as King Bowser (Zoro would make a great fire-breathing reptile and he deserves to wear leather, spiky bracelets and a choker)

Nami as Princess Daisy (do I need to explain?)

Usopp as Luigi (Luigi is a hero too, okay?!)

Sanji as King Boo (the vibes are there, okay? it would work super well with his suit aesthetic)

Akaito Coraline as Princess Peach (Cora is royalty, okay??? Also, she would love to wear a princess dress even for one day and put SO MUCH work into her costume - alternatively, I could see her as Pauline)

@daughter-of-melpomene @thehedgehogat221b @starcrossedjedis @come-along-pond

#ohc2023 #pre-ohc2023 poll #costume pageant

[astrognossienne]

scandalous icon: david bowie - an analysis

“I always had a repulsive need to be something more than human.” - David Bowie

Spoken like a person with such power-hungry and ambitious signs such as a Capricorn sun and Leo moon. He was the self-described “tasteful thief” who appropriated from and influenced glam rock, soul, disco, new wave, punk rock and haute couture, and whose edgy alter egos invited fans to explore their own dark places. He was a person of relentless movement. He was an innovative, visionary, restless artist. His theatrical flare, creativity, sexual ambiguity, and incredible music kept the public endlessly interested. He was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 1996. Rolling Stone ranked him among the greatest artists in history. As of 2022, he was the best-selling vinyl artist of the 21st century. With his sylphlike body, chalk-white skin, jagged teeth and eyes that appeared to be two different colors, Mr. Bowie combined sexual energy with fluid dance moves and a theatrical charisma that mesmerized male and female admirers alike. He was complex, an explorer of human impulses that could not be quantified. He was the infinitely changeable, fiercely forward-looking songwriter who taught generations of musicians about the power of reinvention. Throughout his career, he reinvented not just his sound but his persona over and over again; his best known persona was the flamboyant, androgynous, orange-haired glam rock alien alter ego Ziggy Stardust.

Beginning life as a dissident folk-rock spaceman, his ascent was measured rather than rapid, but once his album Ziggy Stardust And The Spiders From Mars got their claws into the British rock scene, he soared like a supernova, going on to sell over 150 million albums, receive countless accolades, and become a beacon of light for those embracing their sexuality (not least of all those in the LGBT community). He went on to embrace other personas after the demise of the band: a well-dressed, blue-eyed soul singer, a Nazi and fascist-influenced European (the Thin White Duke), a drug-loving art rocker (the Berlin trilogy), a new-wave hit-maker, a hard rocker, a techno enthusiast and a jazz impressionist. His ever-changing, outrageous personae served to mask the painful shyness and insecurity of his younger years. His flair for theatricality won him a legion of fans. His fickleness cost him relationships, friendships and professional partnerships, could be jarring. Members of the Spiders From Mars, his band during his glitter-rock Ziggy Stardust years, learned that they were being fired when he announced it onstage at the end of a 1973 tour. Through it all, David Bowie has definitely always been his own special creation. And it all began for him so long ago when he was just a kid in South London, where he began the journey that, by dint of his genius, his persistence, and his sheer hard work, would transform him into a global icon whose name, image, music, and artistry would endure forever.

David Bowie, according to astrotheme, was a Capricorn sun and Leo moon. He was born David Robert Jones in South London, Brixton, England. His father, Haywood Stenton Jones, belonged to a well-off family who were partners in the Public Benefit Boot Company; his mother, Margaret Mary "Peggy" Jones worked as a waitress at a cinema. The mother of three illegitimate children (including David) at a time when a girl could have been ostracized by society for having even one, Peggy was never afraid to dance to a different drummer. The only child his parents had together, David was born left-handed, which in 1950s England was considered a disgrace, an aberration that had to be corrected at all costs. His schoolmates yelled that he was “the devil,” simply because he wrote with his left hand. Worse still, “the teacher used to smack my hand to try and make me right-handed,” he said. He showed an interest in music from an early age and began playing the saxophone at age 13. He was greatly influenced by his half-brother Terry, who was nine years older and exposed the young Jones to the worlds of rock music and beat literature. Terry was diagnosed with schizophrenia and institutionalized when David was a young man. David suffered another blow, this one quite literal, in a teenage brawl over a girl that caused his left pupil to be permanently dilated.

He attended a high school that would prepare him for a career as a commercial artist. After a few lessons on a plastic saxophone purchased on a payment plan, he began playing in local bands, finding that he liked singing and the female adulation that came with it. To avoid confusion with Davy Jones of the Monkees, he renamed himself after 19th-century American frontiersman Jim Bowie and the hunting knife associated with him. Fascinated by musical theater, David joined a mime troupe led by the dancer (and, briefly, his lover) Lindsay Kemp. By 20, he had spent time at a Buddhist monastery in Scotland and dabbled in theatrical troupes. Bowie met Angela Barnett in April 1969. They married within a year. Her impact on him was immediate, and her involvement in his career far-reaching. With 1969’s Space Oddity, whose dramatic title track told the story of ill-fated astronaut Major Tom, he had a hit. On the following year’s The Man Who Sold the World, he experimented with psychedelia, and in 1971, he fused pop-rock with art pretense and experimentalism with Hunky Dory, his first significant album. Angela and David had a son born during the recording of Hunky Dory, Duncan Zowie Haywood Jones.

After a period of experimentation, he re-emerged in 1972 during the glam rock era with his flamboyant and androgynous alter ego Ziggy Stardust. The character was spearheaded by the success of Bowie's single "Starman" and album The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars, which won him widespread popularity. In 1975, Bowie's style shifted towards a sound he characterized as "plastic soul", initially alienating many of his UK fans but garnering him his first major US crossover success with the number-one single "Fame" and the album Young Americans. Extensive cocaine use made him jittery and paranoid, even as it enabled him to be creatively prolific. In 1976, Bowie starred in the cult film The Man Who Fell to Earth and released Station to Station. Seeking calm and anonymity, Bowie spent much of the late 1970s in West Berlin, where he again changed direction with the electronic-inflected album Low, the first of three collaborations with Brian Eno that came to be known as the "Berlin Trilogy". "Heroes" (1977) and Lodger (1979) followed; each album reached the UK top five and received lasting critical praise. These experimentations with ambient sound presaged the synthesizer-heavy music of the 1980s.

After nine years of marriage, Angie and David Bowie separated, and they divorced on February 8, 1980 in Switzerland. In the divorce settlement, she received £500,000, paid in installments, and a 10-year gagging clause. Not wanting to fight over custody, she left their son with David. Returning to live in New York City, Bowie began expanding his range as an actor. He played the lead in a stage production of "The Elephant Man", for which he received critical praise. Bowie regularly released albums through the 1980s and 1990s, although none approached the success of his previous output. He fell in love with Somalian supermodel Iman Abdulmajid, whom he married in 1992 and with whom he had a daughter, Alexandria Zahra Jones, in 2000. After suffering a heart attack backstage during a tour in 2004, he stopped producing albums or touring for nearly a decade, devoting himself to family life. In 2013, Bowie returned from a decade-long recording hiatus with The Next Day. He remained musically active until his death from liver cancer at his home in New York City. He died two days after both his 69th birthday and the release of his final album, Blackstar (2016).

This is a special birthday analysis for David Bowie. Happy birthday, you Capricorn god.

Stats

birthdate: January 8, 1947

major planets:

Sun: Capricorn

Moon: Leo

Rising: Aquarius

Mercury: Capricorn

Venus: Sagittarius

Mars: Capricorn

Midheaven: Sagittarius

Jupiter: Scorpio

Saturn: Leo

Uranus: Gemini

Neptune: Libra

Pluto: Leo

Overall personality snapshot: Deeply serious yet poetically playful, he may have been torn between the self-imposed responsibilities of his career and social ambitions, and his desire to make a splash and have fun. Both proud and humble, at times he couldn’t decide whether he was the greatest or the most inadequate person he knew. When he got his industrious and playful elements working together, however, the world had better watch out, for in his own steady yet compelling way he could be the embodiment of purposeful ambition. No matter what his job was, he was a born professional. With expertly designed flair, he wanted to shine for himself and to achieve for the world. His reputation mattered a lot to him, and when he knows he has earned his praise he savours it like nobody else. He didn’t really mean to be a snob, but he had a way of nonchalantly lording it over people. This is because his belief in herself and in what he felt he must do was so intense. As a man born with this combination he found his way to the top of his chosen mountain. His was a pairing of sunny high-summer and serious mid-winter, an adventurous, gutsy mix of tough-willed, dedicated service carried out with zest and pizzazz.

He had the charisma of a star yet he worked dutifully behind the scenes, laying the foundations and preparing the party. Then on the day, he made the perfect host or hostess, carrying out his duties with total self-possession and real style. An air of authority and immense professionalism surrounded all his endeavours. He would do whatever was necessary, no matter how hard, to produce a polished performance and a superb result. With a strong social conscience, a real sense of noblesse oblige and a desire to make the world a better place, he was drawn to politics or fund-raising; good works and charities flourished on his enthusiasm and dedication. Whatever he did, he was likely to end up being put in charge, which was just as well, for subordinate positions were not really his scene. At times when the sun was shining he may have protested at having work piled upon him, yet let anyone deprive him of his load and he would feel not only hurt but somehow lost and guilty. Not all his work was totally altruistic. There could be something of the gold-digger in him, constantly alert for opportunities, yet he didn’t expect any free lunches, even if he did enjoy getting the best for the least. He was someone who, to quote her fellow Capricorn/Leo, Jack London, ‘will settle for good pay, good grub and hard work rather than poor pay, poor grub and easy work’. He had pride and confidence in his own achievements and, yes, he thought he could try harder, but in the end, he didn't do so badly, really, did he?

He was tall and slim with good bone structure and clear, open and refined features. His eyes were extraordinary, helping to give him an electric or magnetic aura. His distinguishing feature was his hair, which was always chicly styled, whether long or short. His thought processes were methodical and on the conservative side. He was ambitious and shrewd, serious, practical and prudent, although he could also be narrow-minded, lacking in humour and too concerned with material status. His mind was rational, cool and calculating, and his memory and logic were very good. The Sagittarian qualities that he brought to his career were those of vision, energy, enthusiasm and an ability to organize others. He needed recognition, room to maneuver and a fair degree of authority. He sought meaning and fulfillment in his life through career status and recognition. When dealing with colleagues, he could place strong demands on them. He had boundless enthusiasm and big ideas coupled with high expectations of succeeding. He was also self-sufficient and broad-minded. His genuine pioneering spirit, positive outlook and large-scale personal ambitions led him right to the top. When dealing with colleagues, he could place strong demands on them. He could be an intensely emotional person with extremely strong physical desires. He tended to see himself as a desirable person to the opposite sex. He needed to be loved, but he could also be extremely suspicious of other people and their motives. He acted very cautiously until he was sure of situations and how other people felt. His perseverance was strong, but he needed to learn moderation and not to over-rate his abilities or capacity for doing things. He was interested in foreign names and places, and by anything mysterious.He was a reliable and loyal person. His will and sense of honour were strong and he was a great organizer. On the downside, his self-assuredness could become dogmatism and imperiousness. Conservatism may have affected his creativity, artistic values and love affairs. This expressed itself as self-imposed restrictions or as selfishness. He often felt inadequate, which created an insidious form of oppression over all his forms of expression. He could also take herself so seriously, that people think that he was older than his years.

He was part of a generation that was strongly interested in humanitarian ideals, new avenues of communication and progress in mechanical skills. As a member of this generation, he was able to bring original ideas to both his career and spare-time interests. Crises in thought and ideology arose because he looked beyond tradition and old attitudes towards new original and inventive ways of looking at things, such as music and sexuality. His active mind tended to need constant stimulation and his tastes could be quite fickle and difficult to satisfy. He belonged to a time of peace-loving idealism when the family unit and the way relationships were managed underwent great changes. He could be too idealistic and a little unrealistic when it came to matters of love, sex and romance. As a member of this generation, he needed to be motivated to make the most of his potential, because the line of least resistance appeared very attractive, especially when it involved pleasure-seeking. He embodied the Libra Neptune generation in the sense that he was a huge part of a time when beauty reappeared in fashion. He was part of a generation which was highlighted by the clash between authoritarianism and individualism. As a member of the Leo Plutonian generation, he wanted freedom in his relationships and demanded the loyalty of his friends as a right. As a member of this generation, he wanted power over his own life and was prepared to challenge established structures. He didn’t feel comfortable being dictated to, unless he in some way agreed to it beforehand. He was a part of excesses of the sixties and seventies. He was part of a generation that brought about a revolution in forms of entertainment, recreational activities and leisure time, as well as attitudes towards children. David’s sexual adventures—some partly cocaine-fueled, all ignited by his unbridled appetites and his propensity to cast a wide net, coupled with his unlimited opportunities—typified his generation’s newfound ability to live out their wildness.

Love/sex life: He was the most impulsive lover of this type and the one most likely to forget practicality and follow his instincts. This spontaneity, when combined with his strong physical drives, made him a tremendously exciting, adventurous and unpredictable sex partner. It also got him into more than his share of trouble. But acting in haste and repenting in leisure was not a problem for him. Like all Mars in Capricorn lovers, he rather liked repenting. What was lacking in his sexual nature was subtlety. He pursued his desire with such directness and determination that he could appear inconsiderate and crude and he didn’t control his relationships as much as he bullied people into seeing things his way. The good new is that he was so affectionate and generous a lover that he was easily forgiven his sins. The bad news is that this quick forgiveness only made him more likely to commit the same offense again and again (more on this in my David Bowie sexuality post on my members-only website).

minor asteroids and points:

North Node: Gemini

Lilith: Capricorn

Vertex: Virgo

Fortune: Leo

East Point: Aquarius

His North Node in Gemini dictated that he needed to prevent his idealism from influencing his thoughts to such a high degree. He needed to consciously develop a more clear-minded and analytical approach involving his thought processes. His Lilith in Capricorn ensured that he was dangerously attracted to women who had a scrappy plucky attitude hot-wired into their psyche. He liked a woman who needed to be in control and to be mistress of her own destiny, because her life was in the control of not-so-well-meaning others as a child. Her Vertex in Virgo, 7th house dictated that he wanted a union which would take one to ultimate salvation or spiritual initiation, based on a shared ideal of dedication and service. There was a fantasy of joining with someone who had unique psychic and/or healing powers and the focus is on the practical work which will make everything all right. He was always in a partnership of one kind or another (if only in his head), desperately seeking one, or decided that it wasn’t worth the risk since his expectations would never be met. There was a sense that he wasn’t really complete unless he was intimately involved with someone. On some levels there was an irrational fear of ending up alone. The dark side was that he could get highly self-righteous about acceptable modes of behaviour in interacting with others and thereby alienate the very people he longed for. His parental role model was less than secure in his subconscious perceptions, though it may have seemed fine on an external level.

His Part of Fortune in Leo and Part of Spirit in Aquarius dictated that his destiny led him to a prominent position in life as a leader of some sort. Fame and prestige brought him success and material rewards. Success came to him when he stepped forward into the spotlight. His soul’s purpose asked him to embrace unique and unconventional life experiences. He felt spiritual connections and the spark of the divine when there was a humanitarian benefit to his efforts. East Point in Aquarius dictated that he was more likely to identify with his uniqueness, his individuality and his feelings for justice and fair play. He may have enjoyed shocking others occasionally with unconventional behaviour, designed to prove that all rules can be broken. He may have been very unique and inventive or simply eccentric and strange. He may have been rebellious in a number of areas. He was likely to identify with his mind; he may have been a great rationalizer—able to intellectualize everything.

elemental dominance:

fire

earth

He was dynamic and passionate, with strong leadership ability. He generated enormous warmth and vibrancy. He was exciting to be around, because he was genuinely enthusiastic and usually friendly. However, he could either be harnessed into helpful energy or flame up and cause destruction. Confident and opinionated, he was fond of declarative statements such as “I will do this” or “It’s this way.” When out of control—usually because he was bored, or hadn’t been acknowledged—he was bossy, demanding, and even tyrannical. But at his best, his confidence and vision inspired others to conquer new territory in the world, in society, and in themselves. He was a practical, reliable man and could provide structure and protection. He was oriented toward practical experience and thought in terms of doing rather than thinking, feeling, or imagining. Could be materialistic, unimaginative, and resistant to change. But at his best, he provided the practical resources, analysis, and leadership to make dreams come true.

modality dominance:

fixed

He liked the challenge of managing existing routines with ever more efficiency, rather than starting new enterprises or finding new ways of doing things. He likely had trouble delegating duties and had a very hard time seeing other points of view; he tried to implement the human need to create stability and order in the wake of change.          

house dominants:

7th

12th

10th

His attitude towards partnerships with other people was emphasized in hid life, whether on a personal or on a business level. It also revealed his marriage partner. It indicated how he dealt with other people and how his relationships with others affected him. Also had the propensity to attract enemies, and the effect that they had on his life was an issue. He had great interest in the unconscious, and indulged in a lot of hidden and secret affairs. His life was defined by seclusion and escapism. He had a certain mysticism and hidden sensitivity, as well as an intense need for privacy. His ambition in relation to the outside world, the identity he wished to achieve in regard to the community at large, and his career aspirations were all themes that were emphasized throughout his life. All matters outside the home, his public image and reputation were very important to his. His attitude to people in authority, and how he viewed the outside world, as well as the influence of his mother and his own attitude to her was highlighted.

planet dominants:

Venus

Moon

Sun

He was romantic, attractive and valued beauty, had an artistic instinct, and was sociable. He had an easy ability to create close personal relationships, for better or worse, and to form business partnerships. He was defined by his inner world; by his emotional reactions to situations, how emotions flowed through him, motivating and compelling him—or limiting him and holding him back. He held great capacity to become a part of the whole rather than attempting to master the parts. He wanted to become whatever it is that he sought. He had vitality and creativity, as well as a strong ego and was authoritarian and powerful. He likely had strong leadership qualities, he definitely knew who he was, and he had tremendous will. He met challenges and believed in expanding his life.

sign dominants:

Leo

Capricorn

Sagittarius

He loved being the center of attention and often surrounded herself with admirers. He had an innate dramatic sense, and life was definitely his stage. His flamboyance and personal magnetism extended to every facet of her life. He wanted to succeed and make an impact in every situation. As a Leo dominant, he was, at his best, optimistic, honorable, loyal, and ambitious. He was a serious-minded person who often seemed aloof and tightly in control of his emotions and his personal domain. Even as a youngster, there was a mature air about him, as if he was born with a profound core that few outsiders ever see. He was easily impressed by outward signs of success, but was interested less in money than in the power that money represents. He was a true worker—industrious, efficient, and disciplined. His innate common sense gave his the ability to plan ahead and to work out practical ways of approaching goals. More often than not, he succeeded at whatever he set out to do. He possessed a quiet dignity that was unmistakable. He sought the truth, expressed it as he saw it—and didn’t care if anyone else agreed with him. He saw the large picture of any issue and couldn’t be bothered with the mundane details. He was always outspoken and likely couldn’t understand why other people weren’t as candid. After all, what was there to hide?

Read more about him under the cut.

David Bowie was one of the most influential and prolific writers and performers of popular music, but he was much more than that; he was also an accomplished actor, a mime and an intellectual, as well as an art lover whose appreciation and knowledge of it had led to him amassing one of the biggest collections of 20th century art.

Born David Jones, he changed his name to Bowie in the 1960s, to avoid confusion with the then well-known Davy Jones (lead singer of The Monkees). The 1960s were not a happy period for Bowie, who remained a struggling artist, awaiting his breakthrough. He dabbled in many different styles of music (without commercial success), and other art forms such as acting, mime, painting, and play-writing. He finally achieved his commercial breakthrough in 1969 with the song "Space Oddity", which was released at the time of the moon landing. Despite the fact that the literal meaning of the lyrics relates to an astronaut who is lost in space, this song was used by the BBC in their coverage of the moon landing, and this helped it become such a success. The album, which followed "Space Oddity", and the two, which followed (one of which included the song "The Man Who Sold The World", covered by Lulu and Nirvana) failed to produce another hit single, and Bowie's career appeared to be in decline.

However, he made the first of many successful "comebacks" in 1972 with "Ziggy Stardust", a concept album about a space-age rock star. This album was followed by others in a similar vein, rock albums built around a central character and concerned with futuristic themes of Armageddon, gender dysfunction/confusion, as well as more contemporary themes such as the destructiveness of success and fame, and the dangers inherent in star worship. In the mid-1970s, Bowie was a heavy cocaine abuser and sometime heroin user.

In 1975, he changed tack. Musically, he released "Young Americans", a soul (or plastic soul as he later referred to it) album. This produced his first number one hit in the US, "Fame". He also appeared in his first major film, The Man Who Fell to Earth (1976). With a permanently-dilated pupil and skeletal frame, he certainly looked the part of an alien. The following year, he released "Station to Station," containing some of the material he had written for the soundtrack to this film (which was not used). As his drug problem heightened, his behavior became more erratic. Reports of his insanity started to appear, and he continued to waste away physically. He fled back to Europe, finally settling in Berlin, where he changed musical direction again and recorded three of the most influential albums of all time, an electronic trilogy with Brian Eno "Low, Heroes and Lodger". Towards the end of the 1970s, he finally kicked his drug habit, and recorded the album many of his fans consider his best, the Japanese-influenced "Scary Monsters". Around this time, he appeared in the title role of the Broadway drama The Elephant Man, and to considerable acclaim.

The next few years saw something of a drop-off in his musical output as his acting career flourished, culminating in his acclaimed performance in Merry Christmas Mr. Lawrence (1983). In 1983, he released "Let's Dance," an album which proved an unexpected massive commercial success, and produced his second #1 hit single in the United States. According to producer Nile Rodgers, the album was made in just 17 days and was "the easiest album" he'd ever made in his life. The tour which followed, "Serious Moonlight", was his most successful ever. Faced with this success on a massive scale, Bowie apparently attempted to "repeat the formula" in the next two albums, with less success (and to critical scorn). Finally, in the late 1980s, he turned his back on commercial success and his solo career, forming the hard rock band, Tin Machine, who had a deliberate limited appeal. By now, his acting career was in decline. After the comparative failure of Labyrinth (1986), the movie industry appears to have decided that Bowie was not a sufficient name to be a lead actor in a major movie, and since that date, most of his roles have been cameos or glorified cameos. Tin Machine toured extensively and released two albums, with little critical or commercial success.

In 1992, Bowie again changed direction and re-launched his solo career with "Black Tie White Noise", a wedding album inspired by his recent marriage to Iman. He released three albums to considerable critical acclaim and reasonable commercial success. In 1995, he renewed his working relationship with Brian Eno to record "Outside." After an initial hostile reaction from the critics, this album has now taken its place with his classic albums. In 2003, Bowie released an album entitled 'Reality.' The Reality Tour began in November 2003 and, after great commercial success, was extended into July 2004. In June 2004, Bowie suffered a heart attack and the tour did not finish its scheduled run.

After recovering, Bowie gave what turned out to be his final live performance in a three-song set with Alicia Keys at the Hammerstein Ballroom in New York in November 2006. He also returned to acting. He played Tesla in The Prestige (2006) and had a small cameo in the comedy Extras: David Bowie (2006) for fan Ricky Gervais. In 2007, he did a cartoon voice in SpongeBob SquarePants (1999) playing Lord Royal Highness. He had a brief cameo in the movie ''Bandslam'' released in 2009; after a ten year hiatus from recording, he released a new album called 'The Next Day', featuring a homage cover to his earlier work ''Heroes''. The music video of ''Stars are Out Tonight'' premiered on 25 February 2013. It consists of other songs like ''Where Are We Now?", "Valentine's Day", "Love is Lost", "The Next Day", etc.

In 2014, Bowie won British Male Solo Artist at the 2014 Brit Awards, 30 years since last winning it, and became the oldest ever Brit winner. Bowie wrote and recorded the opening title song to the television miniseries The Last Panthers (2015), which aired in November 2015. The theme used for The Last Panthers (2015) was also the title track for his January 2016 release, ''Blackstar" (released on 8 January 2016, Bowie's 69th birthday) was met with critical acclaim. Following Bowie's death two days later, on 10 January 2016, producer Tony Visconti revealed Bowie had planned the album to be his swan song, and a "parting gift" for his fans before his death. An EP, No Plan, was released on 8 January 2017, which would have been Bowie's 70th birthday. The day following his death, online viewing of Bowie's music skyrocketed, breaking the record for Vevo's most viewed artist in a single day.

On 15 January, "Blackstar" debuted at number one on the UK Albums Chart; nineteen of his albums were in the UK Top 100 Albums Chart, and thirteen singles were in the UK Top 100 Singles Chart. The song also debuted at #1 on album charts around the world, including Australia, France, Germany, Italy, New Zealand and the US Billboard 200. At the 59th Annual Grammy Awards, Bowie won all five nominated awards: Best Rock Performance; Best Alternative Music Album; Best Engineered Album, Non-Classical; Best Recording Package; and Best Rock Song. The wins marked Bowie's first ever in musical categories. David Bowie influenced the course of popular music several times and had an effect on several generations of musicians. (x)

#david bowie #capricorn #astrology #long ass post #star analyses #mine

[adrinoir]

Headcanon pronouns + sexual orientations for some of the Miraculous characters:

These are particularly characters that don't seem like they're straight and/or cis to me. Yes, I know I have A LOT of them lol. These are just fun headcanons, don't take them too seriously. Comment or reblog if you have any other headcanons that I didn't mention!

Marinette - she/her, bi. She totally likes Kagami at least a little bit. We see that in Ikari Gozen and Mr. Pigeon 72. She has a stronger preference for guys, but she definitely likes girls, too.

Adrien - he/him (trans), demi + bi-curious. He may act as a hot shot flirt as Cat Noir, but notice how nervous he gets when Kagami and Ladybug get real close to him. Gives off a lot of demi energy. I also have had a trans headcanon for years for many reasons (feel free to look at my 3 posts on these lol)

Alya - she/they, bi. Alya gives me vibes that she’s not a fan of labels, hence why she’s okay with gender neutral pronouns. I also like to think she used to girl crush on Ladybug before learning she’s Marinette.

Chloe - she/her, lesbian. She also seems like she had a girl crush on LB. Plus, the way she acts towards Adrien seems…hmmm…comphet. She moreso sees him as good eye candy and her cute fellow rich friend. Notice how in Animaestro when she finds out Marinette likes Adrien, she doesn’t even bother fighting her over him, just kinda pokes fun at her for a moment. She acts so much more herself around Sabrina, and got so intimidated by Kagami. I don’t know. She just seems like a closest lez to me, or maybe just doesn’t know her sexuality yet.

Sabrina - she/her, bi. She seems to like Chloe as a bit more than a friend, js. She unhealthily worships her and plays alongside her as Cat Noir (mind you, Ladynoir is shipped by MOST of Paris). But, she also liked that boy in the NY special. Bi it is.

Zoe - she/her, bi (or lesbian). Everything about her behavior towards Marinette and fashion sense just screams gay. Enough said.

Kagami - she/her, lesbian. Her behavior with Adrien also gives off comphet energy. She genuinely cares about Adrien, just not in the way she originally thought. Meanwhile, when she first interacts with Marinette alone, she’s so nervous in trying to get to know her better. Although, I wouldn’t be mad if the Lukagami ship ever became canon.

Luka - they/he, pan. Luka is so chill, I feel like he’s just okay with any kind of pronoun for himself and likes who he likes. Similar to Alya, doesn’t seem like he would care about labels.

Juleka - she/her, demi + lesbian. This should not be surprising, do I even need to explain? lol

Rose - she/they, bi. It's pretty much canon that she's bi - she was crushing on Prince Ali, then her and Juleka started dating. She's very fem but also seems pretty chill about pronouns.

Nathaniel - they/he, bi. This is also canon that he's bi - he had feelings for Marinette and Ladybug, but then got attracted to Marc real quick (and I'd like to think they're dating). He also dresses very artsy and androgynous, which I love.

Marc - he/him (trans), demi + gay. His last name Anciel translates to "Rainbow" - that says a lot in itself. He's got a very soft voice and features. He's definitely had feelings for Nathaniel from the moment he saw his comics online.

Alix - they/she, aro-ace. Alix has never shown to have any sort of attraction to anyone. She's got her good friends and does her own thing. She strikes me as nonbinary too, for whatever reason.

#miraculous #miraculous ladybug #tales of ladybug and cat noir #miraculers #ladybug #chat noir #adrien agreste #marinette dupain cheng #alya cesaire #zoe lee #chloe bourgeois #kagami tsuguri #luka couffaine #juleka couffaine #ml rose #sabrina raincomprix #nathaniel kurtzberg #marc anciel #alix kubdel #ml headcanons #lgbt #lgbt pride

[the-official-account]

♦️Episode 23 ♦️

Gonna skip mseto's clovenheart and come back around in my pass for the extras

[Felix is spar's ran, androgynous, willowy, Luna sibling &therefore elven light-medium brown skin VERY curly hair, which Spar also has when not slicked back, but brown eyes, sweet smile "between them and tars, they are obviously the more delicate one"]

[Josepha has green skin]

[Merim² is Felix's sibling, spar's Om (om is an ungendered word for aunt of uncle that has become my default for that usage but which I have seen used by other peope exactly once. But I like it. So.)]

The dreams sequence was uhhhh fucked up, methinks!

[Spar's restless & withdrawn when he's angry] hough....HOUGH.

Vellum making sure Spar's all healed up...ugh. ugh. Knife through my heart.

Yk how like there's that circle of distance animals tend to keep from sitting humans and how like dogs will come up really close to like any person but cats tend to stay further away?

Sometimes I think about that in situations like this, and what vellum's doing. Being visible, being available, helping keep watch but...letting someone take their time. Giving space at the same time.

I love that Vellum and Anya get along the are SO ♥️♥️♥️

Omg 🥰carnation🥰

Ah, I'm really glad they went to get her if they were gonna give up Anya........ [Vellum expresses that while he prefers to trust people it's often best to err on the side of assuming dishonesty—mostly at work]

OOOOHHHHHHHH ANYA'S DAD BEING IN CRYSTALLIS MAKES SO MUCH SENSE

Oh my god Anya is so sweet I love her!!!!

Spar if you don't fucking open up your goddamn heart and stop shielding and self isolating every time something sucks I will kick your ass!!!! I KNOW. it's hard, but fuck!

ANYA CALLS HIM KAOLIN VELLUM THEY HAD THE NAME MOMENT RHEY HAD!!!!!! THE NAME MOMENT IM SCREAMING. YAYYYYYY OH MY GOD!!!!!!!! >:DDDDD

They have such sibling-in-law energy. They have such "gossip over tea as the run rises before making sure everyone's up and ready for the family event" energy. Your honor I love them.

OPE spars up.

The hurt/comfort ideas this episode is implanting into my brain.

JACKS LETTER. HOLY SHIT

SEVENTEY TWO HOURS WAS......TOO LONG AGO, HUH? FUCKING HELL

"it's on the list" I'm gonna strangle spar.

Narratively? I love this. Narratively, spars doing so good. Narratively, gimme gimme gimme those good good flaws

Personally? Spar what the FUCK. Spar FUCK OFF. BITCH.

IPSWITCH'S "AHEM" UFKSGSKAGSKDG

"who should even be in charge of this?" technically Vellum, right? He's the one that gives final approval on use of force?

OH SPAR FEELS HELPLESS, THAT'S WHAT'S HAPPENING. Makes sense, checks out, mhm

"QCS LIKE WHY WOULD YOU KILL A POPSTAR" FOSVSOSGSKS FUCK LMAO

Vellum trying to pull Spar's bear hug move.

Oh, goddamn, this scene is....hooooo.

"greggins is gaining a new appreciation for spar's style of communication" spar communicates???

VELLUM PULLED NO FUCKING PUNCHES ON THAT PHONE CALL LMAO

"I need to hyperventilate for a minute and then I'll get back to you" first of all, mood—

"spar has never willingly taken a vacation...usually his loved ones trick him into it" spar is SUCH a hot mess, and I love Tatiana but girl....

VELLUMS BEING A LITTLE ARCHEOLOGIST IS SOOOO CUTE

LUNAVELLA AND BRUNHILDE HI!!!!!! I hope they kick his ass (not literally just give him a good talking to because spar what the fuck)

Spar...Spar speaking to them like that is WILD to me...

"he pats her as if he's comforting her" I am going to run spar a nice hot bath with lavender Epsom salt and fucking bolt him down into it will this man let himself be comforted ONCE?

"the more important thing is that they're here now and I can't keep everyone safe." D:

Spar? Asking for help? Of course not, unheard of.

Bestie those are elven war vets who killed a puppet-master-(functionally)demigod PLEASE let someone help you.

Musician...musicia—DIAMOND. FUCK.

Also NOBODY made diamond a scapegoat in ANYTHING I love them (sincerely) but they are so annoying (derogatory)

RESIST DIAMONDS MIND CONTROL?

YEAH!!! YEAH I WOULD NOT LIKE THAT JOKER FLY CAUSE FUCK.

So diamond had contact with Grey....and wait grey was coming to sindershore? I'm wondering if diamond can mind control on the phone

HEHEHEHHEHEHEHEHE vellum said fuck

(not that he hasn't before? I havemt kaot track. But that was a DAMN well delivered line)

"OHHH! YOUR SPARKLINESS" FUEKGSKDGD

"looks like you've collected more of them!"

"which means over been watching them EXTREMELY carefully!"

Ipswitch is annoying in the best way. Ipswitch is annoying like I hope they never stop talking I have my chin in my hands, tell me all about how deductibles are a metaphor for justice.

Diamond is annoying like when I even hear the name I'm like "oh this bitch again"

WHY DID THEY CALL QC A MINION? MOTHERFUCKER—

""""""""the other one""""""""

"JEALOUS"

"it's seems that you (pointing at vellum) have joined the list of my suitors" hhhh diamond is sooooo lucky to not be real because if we existed on the same physical plane I would be stepping on the back of their heels when they walk at every opportunity. I would mix toner into their hair mousse. I would straighten the backs of all their hanging earrings and bend the backs of all their studs. I would put olive oil in a spray bottle and go ham on their closet.

"I'm being cute" that's a word for it.

BITCH "WHY?" AFTER YOU WERE FOUND WITH THE FUCK WERELION DRUGS THE PERSON YOU INVITES WENT ALL WERELION AND THEN YOU JIST FUCKING LEFT WITHOUT SAYING ANYTHING AND DIDNT UPDATE THE PROGRAMME ABOUT YOUR ABSENCE YOU HAVE GOOOOOT FO SEE HOW THAT IS SUSPICIOUS "WHY" MY ASS. """""WHY""""".

bitchass motherfucker. God.

AND OH YEAH YOUR PROBABLY MIND CONTROLLED KURT

"how is sekitan? :)" I don't trust that question at all.

"I didn't want them to be a fatality in all this" HHHHHHHHHRRNGHHH (wrathful)

[Kurt? May be green-skinned]

I loved this episode so much there are so many feelings in my heart. I was affectionately exasperated with spar, and then diamond came in and I was just exasperated. But ipswitch, Anya and Vellum are balancing it out for me. And also the scene between Spar and auntsssss that. That was so. SO. WAH. —AND END NOTES LUNA AND HILDE WERE GOING TO THE COUPLES DANCE THAT'S SOOO CUUUUTE!!!!

And ohhhhh diamond from from the plot card!! Huh!! They wove into the story so well I assumed they were, like, in the premise of the show!

But anyways I'm still bonking spar over the head with a wrapping paper roll and yelling "YOU. MUST. TRUST. YOUR. PEERS. TO-BE-STRONG-ENOUGH. TO CARRY. THE BURDEN. THAT IS. YOUR HEART. BECAUSE-THEY-CANT. KNOW YOU. WITHOUT. THAT. TRUST. SO. HELP. ME. GOD!!!!!!!!"

@threeheartscast

#half of this is me rantinf about diamond #the other half is my rantinf about spar #and oh yeah other characters exist but they dont make me angry fmsvsksvs #edil chats #edil liveblogs three of hearts #three of hearts #three of hearts pod

[kkemtal]

April 19, 2023

20 Days To Go

Today marks the 1st anniversary with my special favorite person who has been one of my answered prayers that I desperately manifested since before. I'm very grateful amidst the brewing numbness of my mind exhausted from work. Although I get a dose of affection from my significant other and showered loving support from my family, most especially from my mother, I sometimes feel mellow.

You know, something feels lacking and I know deeply there's a huge loophole from one of my aspects that needs to be filled in. Right now, I'm writing my thoughts and feelings as my free expression of solace. Thoughts that spiral from me being a problem in a certain circumstance to a myriad of 'what ifs' of my future.

Who's going to be the right people where I feel like I truly belong? Who are still gonna be my genuine friends in each year passed as I aged? Who's going to be my support system in moments of a cry for help or something that's gonna happen, may it be from scams, hospital bills, delayed loan payments? Although I have not come to reach at this level yet nor do I ever want to step into that real test of adulting, I have to acknowledge to the possibility that someday I would come to a point similar to those aforementioned scenarios. I must have the right practical resources to combat these unfavorable possibilities.

It's the sense of belongingness that's lost in me. The friends I had since high school and college we drifted apart by not being acknowledged especially everytime if we posted rarely at social media. At those points, it is a test of who matters the most by just hitting the chat and ask how's life doing then hoping am invite to catch around. None of that happens to me. Probably, I could see why. It's the pace and the level where I am compared to them in terms of career and settlement.

This just paints me as the sad girl who's robotic at work. I put boundaries to keep me fully sane. As much as possible, not getting myself in troubles or any sort of mischief. I feel like I am the problem. I just keep most of my relationships superficial or is it the different people I deal with at my everyday job doesn't somehow reach at a level of our rapport to be considered as friends? Or whom we feel or relate to outside business?

The pivot of my unending overthinking drains me mentally. No wonder I, probably most of time, feel so droggy early in the morning. This is exhausting. And hurting. Subtly. Overthinking what my counterparts who are three times the rank more than me perceive me based on what they hear about me or saw me somewhere that I do not display as a professional at my leisure times. Thinking they don't like me because of those possible situations and gosh, I hate formulating on how to make people or someone you know you haven't spoken with like me for first impressions. I could feel if someone ain't the same wave as me jiving from work or outside of that aspect.

I feel like a nobody. Just someone who's got superficial relationships harvested from work. It is business, the offers and close dealings. No time to make in hanging around with the clients or some coworkers you want to grow closer outside business. It's sad because we are all gonna run and spend time at our special haven - the ones we considered as priority, the family. Elimination round is the place where I'm always feeling to be by the means of spending energy to who truly deserves it. Who deserves to be inserted on a busy schedule and despite everything.

I feel like I am the least favorite and it hurts thinking about it. Being so pensive about due to my quirkiness and my crooked dialect. Doing my best to talk normally with people by avoiding to come out sounding like a foreigner who's trying hard to speak our local language. I really hate this flaw about myself, besides looking so androgynous - my secondary insecurity but learned to be proud and embrace my physical flaw.

I just wanna cry, pondering what route God is going to direct me before I hit the cusp of 30s? If I am still going to continue at my sales career? Going on the flow that is how passive I do while there's no any door of opportunity to help me get out from this place I am stuck at. Sales is a love-hate relationship. You feel stuck at it the more you get yourself loaded accounts from referrals and endorsements. That's great! However, the whole cycle drains me alot, especially being your most passive self to entertain business clients.

I'm so tired. I wish and pray and manifest the all things in balance to keep me abundantly happy that produces more high quality results from the craft I am innately so great for. Something brand new but it wouldn't take away the very core from my soft skills or anything that aligns with that. Alot of new experiences, new people as instant friends outside business. New level of comfort like staying in a condo for awhile long whilst being with significant partner for business/work. Generating more booming income. And travels like no other.

Manifesting, gradually each subject of full hearts desire will be aligning to reality from just dreams we so desperate to have.

Ciao!

-kkemtal

#kkemtal #future