#my poor poor psychiatrist is doing what she can

[starrycassi]

Hate, love, guilt, mothers. Aren't they all synonyms?

You can find part one of this au here, and two here. Also a quick explanation on who's Gloria here. Mild nsfw mention at the end. Like, super mild.

The grounds of the Goldenloin mansion are always breathtaking, it doesn't matter how many times Ballister's been here as a guest, as an intruder, as a knight, as a lover. The gardens are fantastic, and the structure makes him feel so, so tiny.

Standing here, looking at the dining table made for dozens and dozens of people, Ballister can't help but feel out of place. The maid that guided them here is mimicking their pose, right next to them, and Ballister signals to Ambrosius, tugging on his sleeve. There's no need for her to be here, too. She should be free to leave.

Ambrosius gets the memo and dismisses the poor girl, who leaves quietly and quickly. Ballister's skin itches.

In front of them rests a wonderful feast, colorful and appealing, even if some plates are covered with golden silverware, to protect the food from loosing it's flavor, or whatever. He can't help but wonder how many street kids are hungry right now — can't help but remember what it's like, to be alone and lost and begging for a crumb of bread, a sip of water, a simple plate of food and be denied and-

The echo of someone's steps brings him back to the present, and he stares at the woman as she walks in. Captain Gloria limps as she arrives, her golden hair down in a braid that reaches her lower back. She gleams at them, despite the clear pain that every step delivers to her system. Her eyes aren't quite focused.

Ambrosius suddenly goes still, fixing his posture.

The two of them just accept the silence, live in it, for the next couple of seconds. Gloria finally gets to the table and sits down slowly, hissing when she finally does so, reeking of alcohol and a splendid perfume. She's at the head of the chairs, and Ambrosius rounds up the table to sit right next to her. Ballister tries to follow him.

“Don't” orders the woman, her hand suddenly reaching out to grip Ballister's wrist. She tugs on him, making take a seat, too, at her left. Ambrosius stares at him with a questioning look, and he stares back with an even more questioning look. It's his mom that's acting weird, he should know what's going on.

They don't have to figure it out, though, because she explains it soon enough.

“You are not here as Ambrosius's guest, today. You're a suitor. Act accordingly or get out”

Her voice, cold and demanding, takes both of the boys by surprise. Gloria's and Ballister's relationship has never been a specially warm one, but all in all, he's always seen her as a stressed out woman who doesn't really care about anything but her work and her son. Everytime they've been together she's drunk, hurt, on duty, or in a weird combination of those options. She's never been openly hostile or mean to him, so he's left in unexplored grounds when her blue eyes are suddenly fixed on his face, pinning him to his seat and making his head spin with with dread and doubts.

“Mom, there's no need to-”

Ambrosius tries, he really tries, to reason with her. Gloria, who's whole body moves weirdly and limply, suddenly hits the table with her fist closed, and Ambrosius straightens up in his seat, body reacting before his mind does so, instincts ingrained on him urging him to obey and comply to orders, even the unspoken ones.

Ballister knows the look on Gloria's eyes — he's seen it before, only, not on her face — she's not only intoxicated, not merely wounded. She's full of regret, of fury, of pure and unfiltered anger. As soon as that knowledge hits him, he's filled with a strange sense of security, of comfort. She's mad and she's irrational, but he knows the reason of those feelings. She's merely a mother defending her child, a knight defending her loved ones.

Ballister is trying to do the same, and it's refreshing to see his own feelings of confusion and hatred mirrored into Gloria's face. He knows what her anger means, because his blood burns with the same heat, the same intensity.

“I'm sorry, Captain Gloria” he says, slowly and clearly. The nerves he felt all the way here disappear, leaving only his determination, his devotion. Gloria isn't against him. She's against anything that might hurt jer son, and that's a feeling Ballister not only understands, but shares, “It was awfully inadequate of me to act that way. I beg your forgiveness”

She smiles, woobly and unsteadily, at him. She's pleased with his words, clearly. He tries to remember the hours and hours of ranting that Ambrosius blessed his ears with every so often, complaining about stupid protocol lessons that his mother made him take.

“Very well” she nods at him, and he imitates the gesture. He quickly nods at Ambrosius, too, to try and reassure him. This will be okay. It has to.

Ambrosius's shoulders relax just the slightest bit at that, but he smiles, and talks again,

“I'm incredibly hungry, Mum. Why don't we eat before we discuss this, yeah?”

It's always surprising to Ballister, really, how adaptable Ambrosius is. One minute, he's a big dramatic performer for the Queen. The next, he's merely a child with a pleading voice, asking— no, begging, for some peaceful seconds with his mom.

“Yes, the food. Let's eat and talk business, shall we? That's not really an appropriate thing to do, I suppose, but I can make an exception, seeing as how you've had the guts to ask for my son's hand in marriage, cadet”

She claps, and servants lift the coverings. Some of their faces are recognizable to Ballister. Did they live in the same orphanage? Were they friends, and his mind has forgotten?

This is whst he hates about the Goldenloin mansion. This is what he hates about every single noble event ever. He simply resings himself to his fate, a rejected freak to the nobles and a traitor to the commoners. He tries to keep his eyes on the table, tries not to to think about how some of the people working for Ambrosius, serving him, probably have never even tried the kind of feast he's about to have.

Ballister's never been a religious person, but he prays for forgiveness, even if it's merely for a second. He prays for forgiveness, even if it's undeserved.

The steak in front of him suddenly loses its appeal. The nerves are back, just like that. He hates himself for that, for being so brave a second and then a complete coward in the other.

They simply eat, for some moments. Gloria sips her glass of red wine every so often, and both of the boys chew methodically on their steaks. Food is fuel, Ballister tries to remind himself, tasting guilt and shame in every bite, feeling as if he's chewing his own heart; food is fuel, and he needs fuel for this conversation.

That doesn't make the bitterness of the whole situation go away.

“You said you have a plan” accuses Gloria, after washing down a bit of her salad with wine, “but I'm yet to hear anything about it”

Ballister's first instinct is to roll his eyes, tell her that it's her who's been acting all weird and cranky, but he knows better than to go against an older knight, even if she's drunk and injured. She's also his mother-in-law, and he refuses to feed into the stereotype of in laws not getting along.

“The food just distracted us, mom, that's all. It's really good”

Gloria's face softens a bit, and she offers her son a quick sound of agreement.

“Still. I need to know what you two rascals are up to, don't I?”

As if she didn't just violently smash the table, she laughs a bit at her joke, muttering something about teenagers under her breath.

They do their best to explain themselves without setting her off again, Ambrosius providing Ballister with facial expressions that let him know when to shut up and when to keep going. At the end of it, their food is almost gone, Ballister's guilt is almost forgotten, and Gloria looks almost convinced.

"And what do you win, cadet?"

She looks feral, like a lion ready to chew down on it's prey. Ballister refuses to lose against her, not today.

"I get to see my boyfriend be happy. What else could I possibly want?"

Some of the servants seem too moved by his answer to hide their coos, but he doesn't dare look their way, too scared to find out that perhaps that truly are the kids that grew up on his same street, with his same dreams. He keeps his eyes fixed on Gloria's, blue and brown crashing and figthing.

"Sounds like bullshit to me. No one would do all that just for someone else's happiness or whatever"

She shakes her head in disagreement, and Ballister wants to scream at her, tell her that she doesn't know shit about them, that he would walk barefoot into a burning building if it meant saving Ambrosius. He doesn't.

"I don't need anything else" he says, instead, "I only want to make sure that my boyfriend has a choice and-"

"Okay, say you win" interrupts Gloria, looking bemused with him. He hates the way she stares him down like a mere child, "and the interviewer; because this will be televised, that's a no brainer, asks what do you want. What are you going to tell the kingdom?"

He doesn't even hesitate, before answering:

"I would ask for just enough money to pay back my debth with the house of Elpis and the Goldenloin house. Then, for Ambrosius's political allies to be a matter only he can have the final say on. Not you, or me, or anyone else"

She looks at him some more, as if trying to be intimidating. He doesn't budge.

"That is an honest answer" she finally says, nodding, "That's more believable. That, I can accept. I think"

She makes a show of considering things, tapping her index finger to her chin. They keep quiet, waiting for her verdict.

“It's a decent attempt” she concedes, after some seconds of humming to herself. "It's even a good idea"

They both sigh, relieved. She clicks her tongue, and shakes her head, again, like some sort of wet dog, and they feel not so relieved, now.

“But you two are openly... close to one another, right? Everyone knows. Can't do anything if you win and people question us, can we? About your little, well, romance, and all that”

Gloria never really acknowledges the fact that her son is dating Ballister, even if he did come out and confess the secret to her half a year ago, cracking under the pressure of a specially though new years party. It gives Ambrosius some sort of dumb hope, that perhaps his mom might actually start taking his own free will into account and validating his love for Ballister. Even if she always says that that's something she already does.

“We're still trying to figure out what to do with that, Mum”

She laughs some more, making him feel stupid. Ballister looks as confused as he feels when she merely giggles at their faces, gulping down the rest of her drink. A servant refills it immediately.

“You kids are so slow, nowadays” she flaps her hand, rolling her eyes, “a mere fight will be enough. In a public space, obviously. Be nasty about it. My friends and I used to do it when we wanted to get a rise out of our parents. Neat trick”

And, with that piece of advice, she keeps on drinking.

.

Ambrosius excuses them both out of the table when they're done, leaving Captain Gloria to drunkenly mumble nonsense to herself.

The halls of the mansion are spacious and lonely, so they're able to walk together, holding hands, without a care in the world. Ambrosius has grown up here, was raised here. He knows and trusts the staff to keep a couple of secrets.

“She seems… a bit agitated” Ballister says, softly. Gloria has been a sore spot for their conversations ever since the start of their friendship, and they mostly try to avoid talking about her. But if feels wrong, to be in her house and pretend she doesn't exist.

“She's got a dislocated hip” Ambrosius answers, voice impregnated with pity, “Must hurt a lot. She was distracted with this whole thing and a thief managed to hit her real hard…”

He stares at the floor, but they keep on walking to Ambrosius's bedroom. After lunch, Gloria has practically demanded for them to stay until dinner, arguing that they have already lost most of the day, anyways. Neither one of them dared go against her word.

“I'm happy she's mad. At least I'm not the only one worried about your ass”

“I can assure you, Ballister, your thoughts about my ass are really, really different from her thoughts about it. At least I hope so”

Hip bumping his boyfriend for being an idiot, Ballister blushes a bit. Ambrosius does have a nice body.

“Don't be weird about this, Amber. We're literally talking about you mom”

“No, you are talking about her. I'm talking about people's thoughts on my ass. That's a whole different conversation”

“Not a specially interesting one, I'm sure. Much like your very flat ass”

Ambrosius gasps, offended, just as they reach the doors of his bedroom. He makes a show of dramatically slamming the door, just to open it back again mere seconds later, sticking out his tongue at Ballister before allowing him to come in.

“Keep this treatment up, and I'm actually marrying Todd” he threatens, and Ballister half heartedly pushes him.

“Okay, your ass is not flat. Just… sort of concave. Happy?”

“Not so much. But, alas, I'm not really dating a poet, am I? My heart has chosen you, even with your horrible mistreatments towards my figure”

They laugh at the stupidity of the situation, as if guilt isn't eating Ballister alive, as if Ambrosius isn't worried to death for his mom, as if the world isn't collapsing and burning around them.

They take of their shoes, and get into bed, cuddling with each other almost immediately, used to it after years and years of practice. Ballister rests his cheek on Ambrosius's chest, and they hold hands, tangling their legs. This is incredibly inappropriate to do on Ambrosius's house, with his mom meter away, but everything around them feels so wrong right now that this is the closest they can get to normal.

The events of the last few hours settle in. Panic comes back, alongside with every other emotion that they have been trying to run away from. It's scary, to admit that perhaps they could fail. They could be wrong. Ambrosius understands why his mom seems to be in denial all of the time; it's easier to pretend that something is not happening than to deal with the fact that it is.

The room is quiet. They're just teens.

“I'm nervous”

“Me, too. I'm terrified”

“Yeah. Me, too”

And it's just them, their fears and their breaths, for a second. There's nothing else but them. But reality is always there, waiting, and it comes with paperwork and legalities and many, many other things. It's them against the world, even if they would really, really like to just make peace with everyone and sleep until winter.

To avoid silence — because it comes with too many questions, too many memories, too many reminders — Ballister decides to keep on with their plan, furthering it, and asks, “So, now, we fake fight?”

“I think it's the best choice we have, right? Mom said so”

Ambrosius, always eager to follow Gloria's word, seems to perk up. Ballister feels slightly annoyed, but at least his boyfriend looks a little less like a kicked kitten.

“And what are we figthing about, uh?”

This is scary, too. Yeah, a fake figth. That's something they should be able to manage. But there's some issues, here and there, and perhaps they're just waiting for a chance to come out. This could be that chance. And there's no way they're going to actually live apart from each other, but they have to, right? So it's believable.

“What about something stupid? Like, I don't know, jazz?”

“Ambrosius, you know very well how I feel about-”

To stop his boyfriend from going on yet another campaign of hate against freestyle jazz, Ambrosius gives him a quick kiss on the hair, successfully making him shut up.

“Kay, not jazz. What, then?”

“Let's fight about this. I'll be jealous, you'll scream at me for being jealous, and we'll break up. Call me a selfish insecure asshole, or something”

Ambrosius immediately pants like a wounded animal, frowning. He makes Ballister get up slightly, to make sure he can see his eyes. They're full of love. Pure, solid, love.

“I don't ever want to hurt you, Bal”

Ballister chokes on air, because this isn't fair. Ambrosius is so pretty, resting on the mattress, looking up at him. No one else but him should ever get to see him like this. Specially not some imbecile who thinks figthing for him is enough to get married.

“It's just going to be a play-pretend situation, Amber. I don't wanna hurt you, either, but it's going to be just a couple of days. Then, we're back to normal”

Ambrosius ponders on it, pouting. But he finally nods, agreeing.

“Fine. We're hating each other from now on”

.

The next time Ballister wakes up, they're back at the Institute, half naked, fused together like a pretzel. Perhaps they got a bit too sentimental when they came back, and perhaps they stole a couple of sips from Gloria's wine reserve. A make out session had been the start of their so called hate, and Gloreth, did they suck at this.

“Ambrosius. Ambrosius, wake up. Ambrosius, fucking move”

With a bit more of force than needed, he shakes his boyfriend, trying to get him to open up his eyes. Ambrosius attempts to do so and also get up, miscalculating, and falling face first to the floor.

Shit.

Hurrying up to help him, Ballister trips, too. The wine is still in their systems, apparently, and it makes them laugh like idiots as soon as their gazes cross.

“Shit. We're supposed to be figthing, Amber”

“I'm pretty sure last night counts as a form of combat. Sword figths, one may call it”

“Shut the fuck up, honestly. Just, for once, shut up”

“Only if you kiss me, babe"

Okay, maybe they aren't suited for a divorce yet. Ballister got up, grunting, and Ambrosius followed suit, if only because the floor is way too cold to be laying on it with nothing but a boxer and shorts on. He smiled at the wall when he managed to stand up on his own two feet, still dizzy.

“What now, Bal?”

Ballister struggled to put his shirt back on, trying to remember where the fuck his shoes where. It was early, still. If he hurried up, he could sneak out without anyone seeing him.

“Dont ask me. This whole thing was your plan. Think, Ambrosius; for the first time in your life, think”

Ambrosius threw the nearest object at his ungrateful boyfriend, and rolled his eyes when the comb impacted against the desk. Turns out his aim gets affected by alcohol. Who could've thought?

“What was that for?!” Hisses Ballister, barely managing to get done with his clothes. Ambrosius's loopy smile only grew bigger at the sight, and he looked so much like his mom, for a second. Just a second.

“We're figthing, love. I think this is how figths are supposed to go, right?”

And he threw a hair cream bottle, that impacted on the wall.

Ballister opened up the door, just in time for the notebook Ambrosius threw to go flying through it. Some cadets were already out, curious about the noise. Ambrosius, drunk and ad impulsive as his mother, grinned with pleasure. Yes, a public fight, indeed.

“And get out!” he screamed, remembering the way his mother looked at him yesterday, feeling the tears burning on the very corners of his eyes, hating her stare and wishing she looked at him more often “I don't want to talk to you ever again, you hear me?!”

A pillow was thrown. Ballister fought down the urge to burst out laughing. This felt so much like a cheap soap opera.

“It's not my fault you're a coward!” He screamed back, wine helping him come up with the words, “Go and die for all I care, Golden Boy! Hang yourself from a fucking tower, I don't give a shit!”

More and more people came in to witness the situation. Had he been sober, Ballister probably would've stopped. He wasn't, though.

“You're so jealous!” Screeched Ambrosius, like he meant it, “You're just jealous of my suitors being way better than you, you prick!”

Ballister kneeled down, picked up the fallen pillow, and threw it right back at it's owner. Ambrosius barely contained his cackles.

“I'll enter the fucking tournament just so I can disown you, Ambrosius! You don't deserve all that money!”

They were losing the plot a bit, but it didn't really matter. A figth is a figth, no matter the reasons.

“Do whatever you want, Ballister! You're never winning, never !”

Next, a sweater came in, balled up, flying. This one actually hit Ballister on the eye, and he had to take a step back, surprised. Ouch.

“We'll see about that, you idiot!”

With a final heated stare, Ballister turned around, bitting down his tongue to dissimulate the giggles.

.

As soon as he got into his room and locked his door, Ballister opened up his cellphone, already missing his boyfriend's arms. He found a couple of drunken voicemails Ambrosius had already sent his way, and a couple of pictures that matched the vibe of their last night.

Smiling, he got into his own bed, hiding under the sheets. Perhaps intense figths weren't such a bad idea for their relationship, after all.

#nimona movie #goldenheart #ambrosius goldenloin #ballister nimona #nimona #ballister boldheart #nimona (2023) #ambrosius nimona #ambrosius x ballister #ballister blackheart #tournament au #I'm sorry this is like one week late I was having a manic episode #my poor poor psychiatrist is doing what she can #I honestly am about to fall asleep no grammar check is needed when you have god on you side #i really want a sandwich right now #I love writing these idiots atp I don't even know if I'm doing a good job but damn am I having fun #it's 1:20 am. enjoy #I don't accept criticism but I'll kiss you in your sleeo if u leave a comment #not in a creepy way #in a santa Claus way

[disillusioneddanny]

This was inspired by this post. This will also be turned into a multi chapter fic on my ao3. You can subscribe here

But enjoy <3

Tw: talks of vivisection and abuse

Harley Quinn stumbled through the streets of Amity Park, newborn baby clutched to her chest as she furiously checked over her shoulder to make sure no one was following her. She had done it, she had finally gotten away from Mr. J for good just six months before. If he came lookin’ for her, she would be able to handle him on her own, especially with the help of Ives. But Danny wouldn’t be able to do jack shit against his crazed sperm donor. So, Harley was doin’ what she thought would be best. She was going to ask her step-brother and see if he and his wife could take him.

If anyone would be able to protect her baby it would be Jack Fenton, her step-brother was a hulking giant of a man and while his aim may have been shit, his wife’s wasn’t. The two were scientists, ghost hunters if Harley remembered right and they would be just crazy enough to think Mr. J was a ghost if he showed his slimy face around Amity Park.

“Don’t worry Danny, they’ll keep you safe, I promise. You’re never gonna have to worry about a crazy father tryin’ to kill you or use you for his own gain, I won’t ever let that happen,” Harley said quietly before pressing a soft kiss on her son’s head and knocked on the door of Fenton Works.

His father was trying to kill him. Danny allowed his sister to drag him out of Fenton Works and to her car, head spinning, lungs burning for oxygen. Telling his parents about his ghost form had gone bad, it had gone so, so, so bad and now Jazz and Danny were running for their lives as Jack Fenton shot another ectoblast at the siblings.

“Jazz, where’re we going to go? What are we going to do? You destroyed the portal,” Danny gasped out once Jazz had shoved him into the backseat of her beat up, gray, ‘78 Volkswagen Beetle. He scrambled in just as Maddie shot in the spot he had just been occupying, his sister grunted as she took the shot. While she was liminal, she still had enough human in her that it was nothing more than feeling like she got an instant sunburn.

Jazz slammed the door shut, ignoring the shouts from the Fentons behind her as she got around to the driver’s seat and sped off, tires spinning against the pavement.

“We’re going to Aunt Harley’s,” Jazz said determinedly.

“My mother?” Danny squawked from the backseat. “Didn’t Da-Jack say she was crazy?”

“Jack’s crazy Danny! He had you strapped to a table-” Jazz stopped herself as a guttural growl escaped her lips. “Whatever. Aunt Harley will be the best option. If anyone can keep us away from the Fentons it’ll be her.”

Danny slumped down in the backseat and finally looked down at the giant cut on his chest and let out a groan. His mother. Jack and Maddie had never hesitated to tell Danny where he had come from. Jack in particular boasted about how his poor, abused sister trusted him of all people to raise her baby and keep him safe from harm.

Joke’s on him apparently considering he was the very person who had managed to hurt Danny the most. Danny wasn’t stupid, though, he had heard about Harley Quinn. The psychiatrist turned villain who was now in her own way a hero but remained the self titled Queen of Chaos. He knew that his mother was dangerous, each time she had come to visit with her pasty white, tattoo covered skin, chemically bleached hair, and slightly crazed look in her eyes, Danny knew. He knew that the reason Dan was a reality was because of his genes, because of where he came from.

He had done everything he could to make sure he wouldn’t turn out like his mother. And if his suspicions were correct, he would do everything to make sure he didn’t turn out anything like his sperm donor. There was a reason Danny hated clowns and it wasn’t just because of Freakshow.

“Do you think she’s going to be happy seeing us at her house, though? Or Aunt Ivy? She’ll probably be annoyed that we dropped in unannounced,” Danny said before reaching down and grabbing the metal box that held his first aid kit. He used his powers to thread a needle with fishing wire and bit his lip hard as he forced the needle through his skin and started to sew up where his parents had started the vivisection. It would most likely scar but Danny didn’t want to think about that right now. Danny didn’t want to think about anything right now except for the fact that they were going to his mother’s house of all places.

“Danny, your mom adores you. She didn’t drop you off at the Fenton’s to abandon you. She did it to protect you. Aunt Harley knew that she wasn’t capable of raising a baby and she did the most responsible thing she could think of. But she loves you, she’s loved you from the moment you were born,” Jazz told him, glancing in her rearview mirror to watch her baby brother sew himself up as she sped down the highway.

“And how do you know that?” Danny asked, a hiss escaped from between his clenched teeth as he got to the worst part of the cut and continued with his sewing.

“Because I was there the night she brought you home. And I see it in her eyes when she comes to visit us. She loves you Danny, she was just in a bad situation,” Jazz reasoned, knuckles white on the steering wheel as she sped onto the onramp to start their journey from Amity Park, Illinois to Gotham City, New Jersey.

“And she’s just going to be happy to have her sixteen year old son randomly appear in her front door? She couldn’t take care of me then, what makes you so sure she can help us now?” Danny spat out as he finally finished his stitching and tied off the thread. He reached into the kit once more and grabbed a few of the antiseptic wipes that had been packed in and cleaned the ectoplasm-blood mixture off of his chest as best as he could before taping gauze to his chest. It wasn’t the best patch job and Frostbite would probably be horrified if he saw it, but it was the best Danny could do with a tiny first aid kit in the back of his sister's rickety car as she went well over a hundred miles per hour in a seventy.

“I think so, yeah,” Jazz admitted after a few minutes of silence. Danny let out a huff of a laugh as he struggled to sit up. “There’s a shirt in this bag,” she said, tossing him the backpack that sat in the passenger seat, the go bag for if the worst had ever come to fruition. Which it definitely had.

Danny dug through the bag and found the tried and true NASA shirt folded carefully within the bag and let out a sigh through nose as he carefully maneuvered around to get the shirt on without angering the stitches on his chest too much. Even if his mother wasn’t happy to see them or able to take care of them, she’d be able to help. She was a better option than any other.

Vlad was completely out of the picture. Dani was ancients only knew where and she wouldn’t have been able to do much anyway. Sam and Tuck still didn’t even know what had happened and Danny hadn’t decided how he was going to deal with that. Aunt Alicia would most likely call mom-Maddie if she saw them on her doorstep.

Aunt Harley was their only option now that the portal was destroyed and Danny certainly did not have the strength he would need to open a portal. Plus, Gotham had plenty of ambient ectoplasm according to Tuck’s research.

When they had first made this plan, Tucker had looked into any place that came close to having the same amounts of ectoplasm as Amity Park and Gotham had been number one on the list. So at least Danny had that going for him.

“I’m going to try to get a little bit of rest, getting cut open drains a guy,” Danny said with a chuckle, pressing the backpack into the car seat and carefully laid back down. “When I wake up, we can switch and I can drive for a bit. You need rest too.”

Jazz simply hummed in response and said nothing more as her little brother settled into the backseat and allowed sleep to take over.

“I told you I could have helped drive here,” Danny muttered as Jazz pulled into a shady looking, nondescript building.

“Danny, you had to sew yourself back up in my backseat. You needed the rest far more than I did, besides, no use in complaining, we’re here now,” Jazz said, glancing back at the tired, pouty look on her brother’s face and smiled. “Aren’t you excited to see your mom and Aunt Pam?”

“Is she technically my stepmom?” Danny asked once Jazz put the car in park and shut off the engine. She got out and went around to Danny’s door and helped her baby brother out of the car.

“Technically?” Jazz said, crinkling her nose as she thought it out. Yeah, that would make the most sense anyway. “Are you okay?” She asked as Danny winced, pressing a hand to his chest as he climbed out of the small car and leaned heavily against Jazz’s side.

“Yeah, just hurting,” he murmured and shook his head as if that would get rid of the pain. “Let’s just go.”

Jazz gave her brother a concerned look but locked her car nonetheless and started to help the boy up the stairs before she rung the doorbell.

The two tensed as they listened to footsteps stomp their way.

“Look, I’m Jewish, I ain’t interested in that Jehovah’s Witness shit,” they heard Harley shout before the door swung open.

Harley’s jaw fell open as she froze in place at the scene in front of her. The two teenagers were quite the sight. Harley had never seen the usually put together Jasmine look so frazzled as long as she had known her niece. Her son was in even worse states, if the eyebags on his face, the strange blood and green stains on his shirt, and panting told her anything.

He looked up at her tiredly, the dark circles under his eyes even darker than she had initially noticed. “Hey mom,” he said with a huff, hanging from Jasmine’s shoulders.

“Aw fuck, come in, come in,” Harley said wearily, ushering the two into the building. “Ives! I need your help!”

Harley carefully moved her niece out of the way before she quickly lifted her son into her arms and started down the hallway. “It’s okay Danny, Mama’s gotcha,” she murmured, cradling the sixteen year old boy to her chest as she carried him bridal style. Jazz followed her aunt as they made it to the living room just as Ivy came out of the bedroom looking confused.

Her eyebrows shot up in surprise, though, as she spotted the three before her. “Shit, I’ll get the salves,” she stated before her eyes landed on Jazz. “Come help me?”

Jazz looked between her aunt and her brother before looking back at Ivy and gulped, nodding her head once before following the eco-terrorist back into the bedroom.

“Oh sweetie,” Harley murmured, carefully setting Danny on the beat up couch. “Baby what happened to you?”

“Jack and Maddie happened,” he said with a hiss as his mother raised his shirt and took in the cuts that had been sloppily stitched up.

Harley’s eyes flicked between the incision that seeped red-green liquid and Danny’s pained face. “Jacky boy did this to you?”

Danny nodded, letting out a whimper. “It’s a long story,” he said as his mom traced a finger over the cuts, the pieces connecting in her brain.

Harley Quinn was a lot of things but she was not stupid. She may not have gotten the chance to visit her son as often as she wanted but the last time she had seen him she had noticed something was different about him. She had been around Ivy long enough to know when someone had gained powers that they barely had control over. She had noticed the way her son’s eyes would flash a startling green whenever his emotions got out of hand. Noticed the way he was colder than before and how his shoulders looked as though they carried the entire world on them.

She didn’t know what had happened to her son or what it had done to him, but she knew he was more than human now. She had seen that plenty of times before. And it looks like the Fentons had discovered this and decided that Danny was one of their new experiments.

“You’re dead, aren’t you?” She asked bluntly, recognizing the toxic ectoplasm that seemed from between her son’s stitches. “Not all the way but somethin’ happened and they didn’t like it.”

“Yeah. I uh, I was fourteen, didn’t kill me all the way, just enough for me to be considered a ghost and you know how mom-Maddie and Jack are about ghosts,” Danny said just as Ivy and Jazz came back with towels, wet rags, and salves to cover the incisions.

Harley raised her eyes from Danny’s wounds and looked her son in the eyes. “I’m gonna kill ‘em,” she snarled, snatching a wet rag from Ivy and started to better clean the wound. “I’m gonna murder them and then when they turn into ghosts I’ll give ‘em a taste of their own medicine,” she said, hands gentle as she cleaned around the wound.

“You’re going to need to redo those stitches,” Ivy said softly, sitting beside Danny’s head and taking it in her lap as she ran her fingers through the black locks, trying to distract her wife’s son from the stinging pain he was likely feeling.

“There’s no point, the wound will be closed by tomorrow,” Jazz said quietly and handed a warm, dry towel to Harley after she had finished cleaning the incisions and carefully patted the skin dry. She then took the salve and carefully coated it over her son’s chest.

“Don’t kill them,” Danny said quietly, taking his mother’s hand in his and squeezed the pale hand in his. “Just, mom, just protect me. Please?” He asked, voice cracking slightly.

Harley let out a sigh and squeezed her son’s hand tight. “Baby, I’ll always protect you,” she promised, still feeling her chest burn in anger at the fact that her step-brother, the one person on this earth she had trusted to take care of her son had caused him this much pain. Jack and Maddie Fenton would rue the day they hurt Harley Quinn’s baby.

#dp x dc #DPXDC #dc x dp #dp x dc crossover #dc x dp fanfiction #dc x dp prompt

[zilabee]

Tony Bramwell on Brian:

- Brian dropped in at the Cavern and, spoiled for choice, fell in love at first sight with each of the Beatles in turn

- Brian almost promised to love, honour and obey them.

- He never publicly showed his embarrassment with poor deals, but one could tell something wasn’t right because inside, he anguished. Chewed his knuckles and grew pale.

- He was a fiercely loyal and honourable friend to those he loved, and ruthless toward those he despised

- He was shy to the point of blushing and stammering, and theatrical to the point of ranting and frothing at the mouth

- His biggest problem, perhaps his only real problem, was that he was homosexual in a still very unenlightened era. It kept getting in the way. Whenever he sat down for a meeting with heavyweights like Sir Joseph Lockwood at EMI, or whoever, he felt they all knew. “They’re talking behind my back, Tony,” Brian said. “They don’t respect me.”

- Paul was fond of Brian and thought he was the best possible manager: one who was courteous, who didn’t interfere with their private lives, but achieved all he said he would do. He never criticized him—none of us did. Brian was a god.  (It was only later that the façade cracked a bit, but even then we loved him. He was like family, and you accept your family for what they are and forgive them most anything.)

- his wonderfully fertile mind continuously thinking up innovative ideas and then worrying about them

- Brian was so different when around his beloved protégés. He became one of them. He was a friend, a chum, charming, trustworthy and kind. He set out to do what he promised and they all said it would never have happened without him.

- Brian bought an off-the-shelf company named Suba Films, which I virtually ran. It was way ahead of its time, the only independent company in England making music videos

- Whenever things got raunchy and out of hand around us, he would make his excuses and leave. At times, he almost ran.

- [on writing his biography]: “You don’t think John will think I’m raining on his parade, do you?” he asked hesitantly.

- I believe that Brian’s paranoia over the Beatles’ contract and his heavy use of drugs led him to think that it was only a matter of time before everything came tumbling down and he would be left standing in the ruins, with people pointing their fingers like kids in a playground.

- He was seriously ill and desperately sought to escape from the circus of his own creation.

- He was tormented by the idea of letting down his beloved Cilla and the Beatles, particularly John.

- He underwent deep sleep therapies at the Priory, being put under for days at a time with heavy drugs.

- Whether he managed the Beatles or not, he would still get 25 percent of their earnings from record sales for nine years. This subtlety had somehow escaped the Beatles, but it bothered Brian. It gnawed at his conscience because in his heart he knew he had conned them.

- [He] was abnormally distressed, convincing himself that they weren’t going to sign up again because they loathed him. Going through months of paranoia, he looked for reasons and forlornly asked the question, “Don’t they like me anymore?”

- It was so silly because it wasn’t like that at all. At different times, all of them commented to me that they would never have signed another contract as “Beatles” but they would have signed individually with Brian.

- “No, I think John hates me now. I don’t know what I’ll do if they don’t sign. What will people think? I can see the headlines now: EPSTEIN DUMPED BY BEATLES.”

- He was now seriously unhappy, not just troubled. His personality had radically changed.

- Brian had resident nurses, doctors who stayed, psychiatrists who lived in, all crowded into that little doll’s house, getting on each other’s nerves. At times he’d make an effort. He would sweet-talk everyone and then escape when they weren’t looking.

- [after Brian's death] Joanne was in shock. She had seen him first. The doors had been broken down and there he was, curled up on his side in bed with Saturday’s mail lying next to him. “We all knew at once that he was dead, but I heard myself say, ‘It’s all right, he’s just asleep. He’s fine,’ ” she said.

- It was unbelievable that the man who had got all this going—the vast money-making machine and the culture shock that had changed the world—was gone.

- The Summer of Love was over and autumn coming.

- I have been asked many times why it was that the Beatles didn’t just hire an office manager to handle their business affairs and pay him or her a salary. It would have made sense. But it never occurred to them. They just went blindly on, trying to find someone to replace Brian, like it was some kind of law. They seemed to think that they had to have a manager, to whom they had to give 25 percent of their gross income, or they’d be arrested or drummed out of the Brownies.

#knowing that joe lockwood was gay changes so many little things about the beatles dealings with him #brian epstein #tony bramwell #beatles books #the beatles

[fandomfluffandfuck]

It’s been a bit since I wrote about feral!Bucky but I genuinely cannot put into words how much Steve (and me) loves him

Bucky now associates physical touch with pain, with torture. He hides from visitors, scampers away from touch, and never lets anyone get close to him. Nevertheless, Steve wakes up from a nap one day with Bucky curled into his side, and Steve is pretty sure that if he could, Bucky would be purring like a kitten. 

“Bucky?” Steve asks tentatively, trying not to spook him. Bucky doesn’t seem to be upset by Steve sudden consciousness, instead just making a small noise and wrapping his arms around Steve’s chest possessively. He mumbles something that sounds like “Stevie”. 

“You alright, angel?” Steve asks with a grin, confused but pleased with the change in Bucky’s demeanor. He knew Bucky had always been closer with Steve, trusting him more than others, but this was still new territory. He slides his arms around Bucky, which causes Bucky to make a happy noise that Steve hasn’t heard in years. 

————

Also, maybe Bucky’s a bit territorial now that he’s been given more freedom. The poor thing doesn’t know what to do with himself. However, after consulting a bunch of psychiatrists and Dr. Banner, Steve knows what he needs to do. He empties out an old walk in closet, and fits it with as many soft things as he can find. He buys as many plushies as he can afford, and stuffs the closet with them. He remembers how much Bucky hates harsh lights now and decides to buy those pretty string lights that Peter has in his room at the tower. He shows it to Bucky when it’s finished and they’ve both had a good day. 

“It’s all your own space, Buck. I’m never going to come in here without your permission. I swear it.” Steve says, holding Bucky’s hand, which lately Bucky won’t let go of. 

“It’s… mine?” Bucky says, slowly, tentatively. He’s scared that all of this will be taken away. 

“Yeah, Buck. Yours.” Steve says, as comforting and securely as I can, trying to make his confidence transfer to Bucky. 

Steve is tackled in a hug, and there are tears wetting his shirt. He hugs Bucky back, pressing a kiss to the top of his head. 

“Thank you.” The whisper is so soft, so small, that it’s almost imperceptible. But Steve hears it. He’ll always hear Bucky. 

————

Then, of course, there’s the moment when Steve’s telling Bucky about life back in Brooklyn, a topic that Bucky is very interested in. He’s going on about something that they did to piss off Becca (“we were teenagers, Buck. The best entertainment we had was making that poor girl mad.”) when Bucky stops him. 

“I remember.”

Steve drops the pencil he’s holding. “You… You do?” There’s so much hope in his voice. There’s unshed tears in Bucky’s eyes, and a small smile on his face. 

“Yes. Rebecca. My Becca.” Bucky’s smile gets bigger, as does Steve. Steve rushes to his side, hugging him. Bucky’s crying, and Steve’s not far behind him. Bucky laughs, and it is the best goddamn sound Steve Rogers has ever heard. “She was so mad. I can’t believe we did that.” He giggles, and it makes Steve feel like maybe everything will be okay. 

previous feral!Bucky

Me too! I am such a fucking sucker for feral Bucky

I am beside myself thinking about Bucky being so touch adverse only for Steve to wake up and find him tucked into his side 😫 and there's something so special, too, about Bucky having moments in recovery where he's so suddenly more himself. It makes it so much more painful to see the rapid realignment. It's as if he's found two loose ends and knotted them together as quickly as his fingers would allow to ensure that he doesn't misplace them again. Gah! It's so just 🤌🏻ouch🤌🏻

Oh my god!! The territorial thing, yes! I've had this in my notes for actual years, waiting for me to come back to it and do something with it:

Sometimes, during Bucky's recovery, he latches onto things with this ferocity, holding until his fingers hurt, distraught when he accidentally breaks it, if the object of desire is fragile, claiming "mine." He won't let anyone touch it, not unless it's over his dead body. Steve has genuinely never been so distraught and proud of someone for grabbing a mug and declaring it as their own. Bucky deserves to have his own things.

Same wavelength, lmao

That's so fucking sweet, though! I love the idea of Bucky having his own space. (And I love the idea of Peter's room in the tower having fairy lights. Fuck yeah.)

Ah! That last part is the fucking best. Steve will never be as eager to be interrupted as he is when he's in the middle of a story, and Bucky stops him because he remembers. He doesn't need to tell him again, he remembers. Steve could fucking kiss him. Steve will kiss him. Steve will pick him up and spin him around, clutching his waist all the while, a huge grin on his face.

In conclusion:

Thank you so, so much for this!!

#asks #sillysickly #anon provided writing #bucky barnes #steve rogers #stucky #hurt/comfort

[samantha-rae-velcher]

Pretty

Joker x Fem reader

Requested by: anon

Warnings: swearing, threats, violence, joker being joker.

A/n: if you don't like the warnings, please don't read

Request: Can I request a Leto!Joker where the reader is Harley’s younger sister (she is telekinetic) and she is a pyschiatrist and she secretly loves J. One day the reader is in one of J’s sessions with Harley but J keeps looking at the reader until J breaks out and does everything that he did to Harley to the reader. J and the reader go to Ace Chemicals to make their relationship offical (you can add the rest) thank u :)

___

Joker sat across from the sisters in a straitjacket. Y/n felt a chill roll down her spine every time he looked her way, but there was something about him that intrigued her. He was handsome, and there was something she saw in his eyes everytime they locked with hers, it wasn't crazy. He knew what he wanted, he knew what he was doing. No amount of therapy was gonna help him, he was perfectly sane. He just wasn't normal, he had a dark side and he chooses to live in his own shadows, behind the mask that is the Joker.

"So who is this?" He asked, nodding towards Y/n.

Harley looked over at her younger sister and smiled.

"Oh, this is my sister, Y/n. She's training to be a psychiatrist, so I thought it would be a great learning experience if she sat in on our session."

The Joker just nodded and kept staring, the session went on and Y/n didn't pay any attention. She at there sketching him on her note pad.

"I'm curious." She said. "Do you feel anger towards anyone here?"

Joker slowly looked over at her. Fuck this man was terrifying, she didn't know how Harley couldn't get up and bolt for the door.

"No."

"Okay, just asking." Y/n went back to sketching the man.

Over the next few weeks Harley and Y/n went back and forth with the sessions, they made a schedule on which one of them would be evaluating him on this day and that day. Harley began noticing changes between the two, y/n had even told him the secret that only the two of them knew about.

"I like your sister." Joker said. "She's innocent."

Harley looked up from her papers, she knew what this man could do to y/n, he could brainwash her and get her to do his bidding. Joker could play the "I was framed! Poor me!" Act to make her feel bad and let him out. Or worse she could fall in love with him.

"Yeah well, she's not coming here anymore."

"Why is that?" He asked.

"I don't want you using her. She's not who you think."

Harley got up to leave, she got to the door and stopped when she heard The joker speak.

"Telekinesis is a new one in Gotham. You think I'd use her to get to her ability?"

Harley felt rage as she flung the door open and stormed out of the room. She wanted a transfer, she was done with this psychotic clown.

Y/n entered Arkham and walked down the hall towards Jokers cell. She ducked behind a filing cabinet when she saw Harley come plowing by.

Y/n had one of the guards unlock his cell and let her in, Joker smiled and leaned against the wall.

"I thought your sister didn't want you near me?"

"Harley doesn't know I'm here."

They sat down, she didn't ask the normal questions. Instead, they had a real conversation.

"I need a machine gun." He said while leaning over the table.

"A machine gun?"

Joker smiled. "You can get it for me can't you?"

"But-"

The Joker stood and came to her side of the table. He gently touched her cheek and leaned in, whispering in her ear. This man made her feel scared, but she wanted more. She was addicted to this man and she didn't know why. Was this love?

"I need a machine gun, Y/n. Can you get it for me?"

"I...yes."

___

Y/n was in her office at Arkham when the gunshots could be heard, the screams rang through the hall as running feet fleeing for the exits came flying passed her door.

Two men busted it down and came at her, she struggled but they had her in a tight grip. The brought her into another room and slammed her down on a table. She felt them strap her down, the room when quiet all but the screams that could be heard outside.

"What do we have here?" Joker yelled.

He walked into the room, he was wearing nothing but pants, shoes, and rubber purple gloves. Joker came closer and aggressively lowered the lamp, blasting her in the eyes with the light.

"What the fuck!?" Y/n pulled at the straps. "I helped you!"

"You helped me?" He asked. "By erasing my mind? No you left me in a black hole of rage and confusion. You and your spiteful bitch sister."

Joker smiled and turned to the table beside him, he began rummaging through items.

"The sister who tried to keep you from me." He moved his head back and forth, cracking his neck. "like she could ever keep us apart."

He picked up two metal things attached to cords. Fear struck Y/n, she started pulling at the straps again, trying to get away.

"What are you planning?" She asked. "You gonna kill me?"

"No, I'm not gonna kill ya, Sweetheart. I'm just gonna hurt ya, really really bad."

"Yeah? You don't know me that well then. Cuz I can take it."

Joker smiled and took off his belt, the sound clanking of the metal going right to her core. He straighted it and had her bite it.

"This is gonna hurt, so I suggest you don't spit this out. We don't want you breaking your teeth now do we?"

J turned in the machine and pressed the metal devices to both sides of her head. Pain shot through her making her bite the belt so hard it hurt her jaw.

All she could hear was the screech if the machine, gun shots ringing through the halls and the joker laughing.

___

Y/n was looking down at the giant barrels of bubbling chemicals. Joker paced back and forth behind her, he gently gripped her hips and turned her to face him.

"Would you die for me?" He asked.

"I-"

"That's too easy....would you...would you live for me?"

Y/n looked him in the eyes as she answered, she wanted him to know she ment it.

"Yes."

"Careful, my dear." Joker circled her. "Don't say this oath thoughtlessly."

He leaned in close, their lips nearly touching.

"Desire becomes surrender, surrender becomes power." He gently places a kiss on her lips. He stayed close. "Are you ready to surrender to your fate? To me?"

She slowly backed up towards the edge, Y/n could see he didn't believe she's do it. He thought she was too weak. Y/n smile and blew him as kiss before letting herself fall over the edge.

Joker watched her sink into the green liquid. He turned and began slowly walking away before he stopped. Joker tilted his head side to side, cracking his neck before he pulled his leather jacket off and jumped over after her.

Y/n felt the air being forced back into her lungs as her eyes shot open, Joker was holding her close and looking at her with hunger in his eyes. He leaned in and closed the gap between them, the kiss was passionate. He pulled away slowly, he smiled and whispered.

"Pretty pretty pretty pretty."

THE END ❤️

I'm gonna make a part 2

#fyp #foryou #fanfic #foryoupage #x reader #requested #jared leto joker #jared leto #joker x fem reader #joker x oc #joker x y/n #joker x reader #joker suicide squad #suicide squad #suicide squad x reader #suicide squad joker

[knightyoomyoui]

TWICE: ANTHOLOGY OF HORROR ONE-SHOTS | "Auntie's Reminiscence" ft. NAYEON

Welcome to my new book that consists of one-shots under horror genre that features every TWICE members! If you are a ONCE and a fan of horror who loves to get spooked, give this series a try! Thank you and enjoy reading!

STORY #1: "Auntie's Reminiscence" ft. Im Nayeon

NOTE: Inspired from true events.

Im Nayeon joins along with her family to pay a visit on her Auntie Eunji’s home. She was willing to go for two reasons: one is because its their group’s vacation after taking a rest from both in their concert tour and current mini-album promotions. The second thing is simply because she cherish her Auntie and the place their about to go through with all her heart.

Her Auntie Eunji’s house in Incheon was her childhood home, and Auntie Eunji along with her husband and Nayeon’s Uncle Hajoon were the ones who stood up as Nayeon’s second parents and family when her mother had to work often after she and her father got divorced. The two had children, a perfect replacement to be the sibling figure for an only child like Nayeon.

That’s one of the reasons why her childhood wasn’t bad at all. She still has another family to grow up and to enjoy with. Sadly, not everything last long when Nayeon had to move back with her parents to Seoul after she got accepted to an Arts School there to study. 

It’s been years since she last saw her Auntie Eunji and also her Uncle Hajoon. Although, sadly… despite how Nayeon was able to have another opportunity to catch up the lost times with her beloved auntie, it’s the opposite to tell for her uncle.

Her Uncle Hajoon passed away from diabetes months ago, and what’s worse was that she wasn’t able to attend the funeral because she was in the States preparing for their tour there at that time. She instead sent her deepest condolences to her family and especially to her Auntie Eunji who must be suffering the most.

The relationship between the two can be described as very strong and truly dedicated. Their love story was one of the best stories Nayeon has ever heard, and that was also the one who encouraged and put Nayeon into curiosity to know what is true love. No offense to her father and mother, but her young mimd grew up to idolize more the other couple.

She was just like among her family that mourned a lot for her Uncle Hajoon’s untimely passing, but it was undeniable that her Auntie Eunji was the one who suffered the most. Every day and night it would not be a circumstance that she won’t gonna cry in despair and grief realizing that her beloved husband will no longer be in her side forever.

Nayeon’s family reported to her that they also tried to console Auntie Eunji but it was then no effect for the grieving lady. Without any other choice, due to the struggle they had to call for a psychiatrist to help Auntie Eunji atleast have a progress on accepting the death of Hajoon.

And that’s what she’s currently experiencing, and along the days came where Nayeon is staying in her childhood home. She would then take a peek on her Auntie’s bedroom, and there she was, crying while either curled down on the bed or sitting while holding one of Hajoon’s things.

“Poor Auntie. I really wish she would finally let go of the pain and accept that Uncle’s truly gone. It may be hard for her but it’s the only way.” Nayeon whispered to herself while pouting at the sight of her devastated auntie.

But then one day, Nayeon’s wish seemed to be granted when while their family and relatives are having a lunch, her Auntie Eunji suddenly came down from her room and joined the meal, surprising every person present in the table. They know that it puts them into hard time urging her to join them for food.

“Eunji! Finally you decided to come eat with us!” Nayeon’s mother and the older sister of Eunji, Seoyeon, gladly welcomed her as she watched her approach the table. “How are you doing?”

“Oh you can’t believe what just happened last night!” Eunji said with an excited tone. Nayeon just stared at her Auntie having a strange enthusiasm right now which is hugely contrast to her daily shallow mood she has been always observing from her.

“What is it?”

She sat on the table and let one of her sons to pick some food and place it on her plate. “Hajoon came to see me last night!”

Nayeon spitted the water she was drinking after hearing those ridiculous words. Did she heard it right? It must be the same question that everyone sharing in the room with her right now would ask too.

How was it possible to have someone pay you a visit when… that person has been recently passed away? Nayeon just watched her Auntie Eunji in her wide grin after saying it.

“W-what did you just say?” Seoyeon asked. Everyone in the room was exchanging glances at each other and muttering something that is probably judging Eunji right now except for Nayeon who remained speechless. “How? W-what did he do?”

“He said he misses me that’s why he wanted to spend some more time with me by helping me get to sleep!”

Chills starting to take over in their skin until Nayeon’s mother stopped this immediately by acting very glad for her mentally unstable sister and some attempts to change the topic. Once she was done eating and fled the room, everyone sighed in relief and started to buzz out their reactions of what just happened.

Seoyeon then tried to convince everyone that it’s probably just a pleasant dream of Eunji in order to cope with the loss, exactly the same thing as what Nayeon is trying to convince herself to believe in. However, it didn’t take too long for another scenarios to come just to disprove and scrap their claims.

Days passes by, and more stories of her Aunt Eunji talking about her private times with Hajoon during the night continues for Nayeon to hear. She tries so hard to wear this mask of disguise that she’s happy for her Aunt being the same old self as she is, but deep down Nayeon is so conflicted at what she truly feels for her Auntie’s condition.

“Mom, this isn’t right. Something’s wrong with Auntie now.” Nayeon talks with her mom while cleaning the living room. “At first I would like to think that she’s imagining things but… the more she speaks about Uncle Hajoon makes it starting to hear that…”

“Nayeon, your Uncle Hajoon is dead. It’s not possible.” Seoyeon quickly cuts off her daughter’s words. “Ghosts may be real yet she probably try to plaster its image as her husband just so she can think that she was still not alone and she still has the man she loves with her. It’s as if she’s finding way to forget the tragedy that happened to her.”

“But mom… it wasn’t doing anything good at Auntie. Her mind is being corrupted with her thoughts, the people here are starting to get scared at her stories, including me.” Nayeon defended. “I just want to see Auntie happy, but in the right way. This has to stop and we have to do something about it before its too late.”

Seoyeon sighs and slowly nods at her wise daughter. “Fine, I’ll give it one more try. She’s my sister, I have to help when she still needs it even if she doesn’t mind it.”

Nayeon’s encounter later that night had her loose her composure and completely disregarded the convincing that her Auntie is still hallucinating manifested from the reminiscence of happy memories she’s doing to remember Hajoon.

She was walking through her room when she noticed that there are footsteps exiting on her Auntie Eunji’s room leading to the stairways that directs to the rooftop. It was very dark there and Nayeon wanted to follow it but her examining at the footsteps was enough for her to feel the creeps.

The footsteps are covered in mud, and it’s size is large. Nayeon hurried rushed down on the living room to stay with her cousins and wait for them to return back in their rooms to sleep.

That’s not where it ends though, Nayeon still has to have one more experience that she thinks it’s definitely one of the worst memories she ever had in her life. 

As she was about to tell her Auntie Eunji to sleep after her loud laughs were echoing through the ground floor, Nayeon slowly checks out the barely shut door through its gap. It was dark, and Nayeon was about to knock when while she was opening the door, she couldn’t fathom what she’s witnessing in her naked eyes.

A tall skinny figure was kneeling beside of her Auntie Eunji who is laughing out loud. Nayeon couldn’t even describe what she’s looking at but one thing’s for certain: it’s inhuman.

In her panic, Nayeon hurriedly clicked the switch to turn the lights on, the figure was filed to be captured though as it disappeared from thin air. She shouted to call her helpless aunt. “AUNTIE!”

She was walking towards the side of the bed when her Auntie Eunji sat up and looked at her with ecstatic expression. She was smiling from ear to ear today.

“ Nayeon! You saw him, right? You saw your Uncle Hajoon, but sadly he said he has to go for now.” Her Auntie Eunji said. Nayeon just scoffed and shivered at the grip of her auntie in her arms.

“Don’t worry, dear. Your Uncle Hajoon says he’s gonna check for you somet-”

“STOOOOPPPP!!! JUST STOP IT PLEASE!” Nayeon suddenly screamed in mercy, making her Auntie scared and confused at the same time. “YOU’RE MAKING ME SCARED, AUNTIE! UNCLE HAJOON IS ALREADY DEAD, CAN’T YOU JUST MOVE ON ALREADY? HE’S NOT COMING BACK!”

“What’s going on here?” Her mother Seoyon along with boys came by at the room to check up on Nayeon after hearing her plead. 

“How can you say something like that? You saw him too, Nayeon. Hajoon is alive and he said he’s staying with us. He did that for me!”

Nayeon couldn’t contain anymore the fear creeping up inside of her. She started to cry and hug her mother, while the rest just watched their Auntie Eunji still daydreaming about the times she and her husband used to share.

After recovering from her emotions, Nayeon tried to narrate what she just observed in Eunji’s room. Unfortunately, none of her mothers, relatives or her cousins seems to believe what she’s saying because they stand for the side that Nayeon is just being sucked up by her Auntie Eunji’s rare delusions.

She still tries to explore what could be the identity of that mysterious figure that she witnessed last night that distracts her really bad. Having it repeating inside her head was giving her massive discomfort.

Despite defending and in denial at Eunji’s stories, it doesn’t mean that they are tolerating it. They still want her old self to return and no more sink herself down from agony because it also affects them emotionally.

Nayeon and her family continues to search for ways to assist her Auntie Eunji but to no avail. She can admit that its beginning to make her lose her hope and feel pity a lot for her sake.

Her stress came to an end… but in a negative note when a month later, they watched their Auntie Eunji came out of the bathroom and proclaims “I’m pregnant, everyone! I’m having a baby with Hajoon!” while raising her pregnancy test.

Nayeon’s eyes largened in a mixture of terror, confusion, and shock at the announcement of her Auntie Eunji. Everything they have thought to be impossible seemed nonsense anymore because… they don’t even know what they should suppose to do about it in order to fix Eunji.

When she gave birth to her baby 9 months later, the doctors slowly handed it to Eunji. As she stares at the features of her son, there’s a part that she acknowleged initially after it piqued her interest.

“He has his father’s eyes” says Eunji as she continues to rock her baby on her arms. Her family, including the doctors, nurses, were all viewing from the door as they watch the wholesome moment of the pair while both horrified and concerned.

-----------------------------------------------------

NOTE: This story is inspired from a Filipino Spooktober 2023 entry by MilkyClear titled "Tito and Tita / Uncle And Auntie" and from the 1968 psychological horror classic film "Rosemary's Baby".

#twice nayeon #nayeon #im nayeon #twice fanfic #twice au #twice oneshots #twice horror #kpop au #kpop oneshots #kpop fanfic #horror #twice

[twilightcitysky]

My daughter is four. She came home from school and told me she was playing a game called “Princess Gets Rescued From a Tower”. The kid of two feminists, living in a liberal city in a blue state, at the age of four, has internalized the idea that princesses need rescuing. 

I did four years of residency in ObGyn and three years of residency in Psychiatry. I am an MD and a practicing psychiatrist. I don’t have the bandwidth to look at the numbers right now, but I will tell you from personal experience with hundreds and hundreds of patients that women are the strong ones. Most of the babies of teen girls I delivered had no support apart from their own mothers. I wrote “father of baby not involved” in the chart more times than I can count. Most of the pregnancy terminations I performed were for girls and women on their own. Nothing made me feel like I’d made more of a difference than providing a desired termination for a teenager and placing her IUD. Now that girl gets to continue her education, develop her frontal lobe, and decide who she wants to be and what she wants to do. She doesn’t have to be a baby trying to raise a baby. She doesn’t have to be another cog in a system that perpetuates the cycle of poverty in order to keep women and people of color from working towards equality, equity, fairness and real change. 

Make no mistake. The overturning of Roe vs. Wade today is not about saving the lives of the unborn. It is about control of women’s bodies and agency, particularly poor women without the resources to travel out of state for a pregnancy termination. Women are meant to be property. Don’t believe me? How many letters have I received addressed to “Mrs. Husband’s First Name – Husband’s Last Name” instead of “Dr. My First Name – My Last Name”? How many people think my kids have their dad’s last name, because he’s the man and when you get married you’re supposed to give up your identity? Yes, it’s only a name. Yes, it’s tradition. But try speaking up against it— even that one, small thing— and see how much resistance you run into. 

Now women want more than our own names. We want to be paid the same as our male colleagues. We want our voices to be heard in legislation and government. We’d even like to be the president someday. At bare minimum, we’d like to decide the timing and circumstances of when we become parents, because women still carry the majority of responsibility for raising children today, with rare exceptions. We are on a tightrope with no safety net, because there’s so little in the way of institutional support for people who end up with a baby to support and no way to put food on the table. 

People who are thinking about how to get from one day to the next aren’t in the streets protesting. People who are terrified that they’ll be beaten or raped by their partner aren’t rallying for change. People who are trying to raise a child on a minimum wage salary with no parental leave benefits, without any sort of support, aren’t getting an education. People who are working two jobs to keep a roof over their heads aren’t voting. 

And that’s the goal. 

The princess in the tower may need a rescue now, but ask yourself who put her there. Ask yourself who robbed her of the tools to escape, because she’s strong and capable. If you’re a woman, stay safe. If you’re a woman of privilege, help your sisters. If you’re a man, speak up for us. And if there’s any part of you who feels that this is a move that will help any human beings at all, including the unborn children who are the proposed beneficiaries, I cheerfully invite you to get fucked. Nobody wins when women are forced to have kids they can’t or don’t want to support. Not them, not the kids… and not you. 

#roe v wade #roe versus wade #roe vs. wade #current events #news #abortion rights #reproductive rights #reproductive freedom #womens rights #unbelieveable #the backlash is here

[dreamerinthemoonlight]

Taking them Home to Meet the Parents (Marius, Artem, Vyn)

This was originally two parts, but I don't think splitting them up makes much sense. Not when both are written and part two was only Vyn

Requests are OPEN, pls check rules before requesting

Cw: just fluff, a shovel talk

Marius x Fem!reader, Artem x Fem!reader, Vyn x fem!reader

Marius

Your parents are split when you bring him home for the first time

He easily charms your mother who thinks he’s “just such a nice boy, you should keep him y/n”

Mentally you’re like “uh huh. sure. Such a nice boy and the biggest tease in Stellis.” Not that you’d mention it. There’s no point in enlightening your mother during their first meeting

Your father is a different story

He’s heard rumors of the younger von Hagen boy and is  suspicious. Very suspicious. though you’re sure his mood is more about the boyfriend bit, not the von Hagen bit. He’s your father after all

The three of you have dinner, while, Marius chats with your mother and your father subtly not grills him on every topic imaginable

When dinner is done, your father drags him outside for a little talk. Before they leave your mother tells him to “be nice to the poor boy, he’s probably terrified” yes, yes he is, but he leads meetings in front of cranky old men all the time. He’s not going to show your dad just how terrified he is, lol

The shovel talk goes about as well as can be expected

“If you hurt my daughter, I’ll make sure you’re a permanent missing person’s case.”

nope, nope, not terrified at all to which Marius responds with a very quiet, “Yes sir, I wouldn’t dream of hurting your daughter”

Your father would be satisfied with the response and the rest of the night goes very well

Before he leaves, Marius definitely gives you a kiss that has your mother blushing, you breathless, and your father reaching for the shovel. It’s something your should have expected, really. Marius wasn’t going to be able to pretend all night. He never can.

Artem

If your parents would be of split opinions about Marius, the opposite is true if you brought Artem home

Your mother would be very pleased with the way Artem cares for you and how much he respects you. Of course, he treats her with the same courtesy, if not with the same openness. 

Your mother does remark that he seems a little distant and very formal. You merely shrug and tell her that Artem is just like that. 

Even with the distance your mother is easily won over

Your father is even easier to please. It’s painfully obvious that Artem respects you no shovel talk needed

He’s even happier when you tell him about his accolades. He wants someone who can take care of his daughter, who can support her no matter what she decides to do in live and Artem is certainly capable of doing so 

After dinner, Artem insists on being the one to drive you home (you came together anyway), which pleases your parents immensely. 

Vyn Richter 

Your dad was seriously trying to find fault with Vyn, he really was

After all, only the best of the best get to date his daughter

But this is Vyn. Despite his god complex, he has his good points and he knows full well how to put those on display

So instead of seeing “your daughter calls me professor in bed” he sees “successful psychiatrist, professor, and someone who will treat his daughter right”

And he will. Red flags aside, his distaste read: hatred of PUAs shows that he will not descend to that level of manipulation

What only you see is that Vyn is genuinely nervous. He doesn’t have a lot of experience at this stage of a relationship I wouldn’t think anyway and he is not nearly as perfect as he’d like to be (you spent an hour trying to convince him that it was going to be fine

So he results to assuaging your dad’s doubts and charming your mother

Boy howdy does he charm your Mom. His polished and refined manner, strict adherence to etiquette, and the gentlemanly way he treats you has her over the moon

So while your Dad is like, “he’s dating my daughter, I don’t like him. But damn it he treats her like a queen” Mom is like “great job, Y/n, he’s a keeper”

Actually, for a moment your mom is a little self conscious over the homely dinner she spent some much time on. I mean, this is fine dining, best of the best, Vyn and he can’t totally dampen that vibe.

But once things really get going, your dad stops interrogating Vyn and your mom stopped feeling so self conscious (a genuine  “compliments to the chef” from Vyn did the trick) things go fairly smoothly

Vyn soon stops being so nervous, to which you think “about damn time” and you end up having a very interesting dinner time discussion

By the time Vyn leaves, all mistrust has been dispelled

As far as you’re concerned, it’s a resounding success

#ah then shovel talk #the number one responsibility of fathers and siblings #treat him/her/them right or else #Marius #Marius von Hagen #lu jinghe #marius hcs #lu jinghe hcs #Artem #Artem Wing #zuo ran #Artem hcs #Zuo ran hcs #Byn #vyn richter #mo yi #vyn hcs #mo yi hcs #tears of themis #tot #tears of themis hcs #head canons #nxx corner

[finniestoncrane]

Hey finnie!

Could I have front row seats with BTAA Scarecrow watching a horror with some bubble tea, a cupcake and pickles?

With an Afab/ or gender neutral reader?

And congratulations on your 2k followers! 🎉🎉 Keep it up finnie your one of my favourite writers. Keep up your amazing work!❤️

thank you so much!! also i hope you like your cupcakes with extra dead dove in them because aheeeeem anyway, possessiveness here has become a stand-in for jonathan's complete control over his patients kjhkjhasd 💚🩷 cw: addiction, drugs (jonathan's fear drugs), blackmail, dubcon (coersive), posessive behaviour, humiliation/degradation 🔞minors dni🔞 send a request • masterlist • kofi link • tag: finnie2k (to follow or to block)

"I swear... I wouldn't ask, I wouldn't stoop this fuckin' low. But I'm desperate, Doctor Crane."

You'd assumed that perhaps given that he was your psychiatrist, that Jonathan would have an ounce of sympathy for you. And failing that, you had assumed that since he was the one who had gotten you addicted to his fear drugs, that he'd feel some level of responsibility. But the way he shook his head, a cruel smile pressed onto his face, you realised you had assumed wrong.

"No money, no can do. Sorry. And do you even have an appointment?"

In complete disblief at his callous nature, you shook your head and scoffed.

"I told your secretary how I was feeling... she said you were free. Please, I'm serious. I need some more. I'm desperate."

With no hesitaiton, as though he had been waiting to hear you repeat yourself, he leaned over his desk.

"How desperate?"

"I... really. Really desperate."

He chuckled, a horrid, derisive tone behind it.

"How embarrassing. I'm sure your parents would be ashamed to know where you've ended up in life. Your friends, baffled that they could have spent time with someone this low on the ladder of life."

This is how he wanted them. All of his patients. Desperate. Begging. In dire need of him and his services. And willing to do whatever he wanted. That's what made them his. That's what gave him the control, the ownership of them.

"Ok, let's find out how desperate then. Stand up, take off your pants, and then sit back down and spread your legs."

"W-what?"

"Apologies, do you need me to repeat all of the instructions again? Or just a specific part?"

You shook your head, mouth open in confusion.

"I just... don't think I understand."

"Oh, you poor thing. Stupid and pathetic. What a waste. Now, are you going to prove you're worth something at least? Or can I get on with my afternoon?"

As tears began to well in your eyes, Jonathan tapped his wrist impatiently.

"Shall I make it easier for you? Do you want your drugs, or not?"

Sniffling, you wiped under your nose and took a deep breath.

"I want them."

"Well then..."

Jonathan snickered as he watched you stand up, a pathetic vessel, there to do his bidding. A symbol of his triumphs. A testament to his creations. An ode to his genius.

#finnie2k #finnie writes #scarecrow #jonathan crane #x reader

[borderlinebox]

Lose My Mind

Summary: Sunato Banda had found his interest in you, a psychiatrist.

Pairing: Sunato Banda x Psychiatrist!Reader

Warning: AiB normalities, Urumi acting like she's manipulating you, a little bit botched jack of hearts cause I forgot how the game went, manipulation, deaths mention, not proofread!!

A/N: Apologies for taking a while to post!! Ive been busy lately with my university but Im slowly working my way through the requests!

Request from Wattpad: Can i request a psychiatrist reader x sunato banda please, I think it would be fun to see how they would interact :) take your time if u do decide to write btw <3

Feedback is highly appreciated!!!

"Please put on the collar and proceed to the room upstairs."

The same ai voice rang through the small room you walked upon in. It was clear to you that the game must've included something about trust or a guessing game due to the looks of the collar. There was a small, circular display of a screen on the back of it.

You gulp before placing the collar onto your neck.

There was no going back now.

Feeling the light cold from the contraption, you made your way up the stairs and into a room full of other people just standing there. They all had the same collar as you.

For the time being, you decided to do what you do best; observe.

Back in the real world, you were a psychiatrist. Which meant you would study harsh behavioral disorders based on your diagnosis. You were relieved on how much your job had helped your ass during games like diamonds and hearts. It also allowed you to understand others and be able to adapt to their personality.

Maybe you wouldn't call yourself manipulative, but you definitely had the great advantage and ability to.

Your mind suddenly went blank when your eyes stopped and stared at a man from the other side of the room.

Sunato Banda.

Yes, you've heard bout him in the papers before, in the real world.

And then, it seemed like you had been staring at him for a bit too long and he seemed to take notice of your gaze. Banda started to stare back at you, as if he was observing you like you did him.

When you realized this, you quickly gathered back your surroundings and looked away from him.

Out of the corner of your eye, you could see that he had interest in you. A dark interest.

As soon as everybody filled out the game's player registration, the big tv screen in front of them turned on - revealing a jack of hearts card.

Everyone listened intently to the game's instructions.

And confirming your earlier suspicions; this is a game of trust. You could already tell, straight off, that most of the players in this room would go off and lie when the option and possibility is given.

Then most of them had gone off in groups or pairs.

Currently for you, you needed to find somebody you could trust. So you needed to observe everybody else first. You're too unbelievably close to finishing off this game - you needed to survive.

That poor boy with his one eye hidden decided to pair up with Sunato.. And it seemed like Sunato had already established his superiority over him.

You looked off to the side and found a boy who seemed like he was having a breakdown every two seconds sitting next to white-hooded other. It was rather odd and unique that they were paired, considering the fact that one of them looked calm and collected and the other was wild and shaky.

You really did feel bad.

But you couldn't do anything about it.

You felt a tap on your shoulder. You turned around to reveal a girl in a blue lollita dress - It was the same lady who suggested going in groups.

"Hey, you seem like you need a team... Do you wanna join our group?" She smiled 'innocently'.

Hesitantly, you looked at the group behind her. They were all so desperate in leaving this place alive that they forgot how to work smarter. Some were shivering, some were talking over others..

"Yeah, sure." You accepted and gave her a quick smile.

You had to accept naturally, otherwise they may suspect you as the jack of hearts. And it was too early for you to die.

She smiled. "Wonderful! My name is Urumi, yours?"

"My name is-" You were cut off by somebody asking if they could join the group and it seemed like Urumi had quickly forgotten about you.

You exhaled through your nose in slight annoyance. Then you darted your eyes off to the side and found Banda watching you again. His newfound lacky had disappeared into the small cafeteria.

Eyes narrowing at him, you were about to go and interact with him, get some non-verbal information from him at least, until Urumi touched your shoulder again with her bright, fake childish smile.

"Why don't we go to the cafeteria?" She persuaded in exaggeration, like a kid convincing for their mom to buy a toy for them. "We can have a group meeting there."

It felt like you had caught the eye of many people, like they knew who you are and what you can do.

You certainly know that you've caught Banda's eye, and now this Urumi girl seemed to be the most friendliest to you.

However you knew better than to trust someone like her, but you needed to follow her instructions for now so you wouldn't raise any sort of suspicion. You had to give her the steering wheel for now.

"Sounds like a plan." You answered her, giving one last glance back at Sunato as she continued to drag you away from the main room to the cafeteria.

-

"You're a club!" Urumi chirped happily, and the group members behind her agreed on with her.

Truth. The cogs in your head told you.

You were sure they said the truth. You looked around and smiled thankfully, "Many thanks." Bow.

After a while, it was time to answer your suit. You made your way to the cell of your choice and waited until the bot's voice said any further instructions.

"Please answer your selected suit."

"Club."

3 - 2 - 1 - Ding! Congratulations, you didn't die.

You sighed in relief and dusted off some dirt of your clothes before leaving your small cell. You guessed nobody had died this round, it's too early for the Jack to start their attack.

You opened the cell and were greeted by everybody else around you, and you were right; no one died. Your group got together in the center hall, all bowing and thanking their fellow teammates.

All of you started to tell each other their symbols once again until that one big bully decided to cause a scene. It was no surprise to you though.

He started threatening and attacking the poor man he forced to team up with him, pushing the victim onto the ground as they cried.

Banda was quick to pick the pitiful man up. "Are you okay?"

That struck you as odd. Surely, it did surprise you.

But then he leaned down onto the crying man's ear and whispered something to him. Despite his back was facing you, it was awfully obvious that he had a plan.

Seeing that the game was a hearts, and it needed you to evaluate how much you can trust one another; you also guessed that Sunato told the guy to lie.

It was only inevitable.

When the attacker was about to strike again, he was stopped by his words.

"Club! You're.. a club.." he cried, begging him to not hurt him anymore.

What a sad display in front of you. But it was the duality seen in reality. Where the bigger people fight the weak just to show the dominance they have over them. But it is a world that you have accept. You looked down in shame - not for yourself but for the humanity you live with.

"Don't wait so long next time." The bully chuckled and left.

He walked by you and his collar was in fact, not a club. Nobody decided to tell, letting the foolish man fall into his inescapable death.

After that, slowly, people died. One by one. It started off with that half-witted man, then the man who lied and so forth, so on. And it was all because of Urumi with her suspicions.

It was clear as day that she liked manipulating people using her childish charms.

You were thinking on leaving the group as you sat on those cafeteria benches.. But how were you going to do it without seeming suspicious? Well, you had no choice but to start avoiding her or tell her right away. But maybe next round, there was 20 minutes left and you had just done that group meeting. Thankfully, they haven't lied yet, or else you would have some serious problems.

"Hey."

You know that voice. You could feel your breath hitching and your nervousness starting to rise, but you had to keep yourself composed. Don't show fear.

You turned around to face him, "Banda."

He smirked darkly at you - A smile you've seen a thousand times on people like him.

Banda made his way to sit in front of you. He had his interest piqued at the very moment he had his eyes on you at the start of the game. He knew you were way ahead of the rest. The way you narrowed your eyes at people you were reading.

It also felt like he knew about you way before this game. Dare I say; world.

"I've seen you eyeballing me every time you enter a room." Banda taunted as his small, creepy smile never went away.

"You act as if you don't do the same." You remarked. "I know who you really are, Sunato Banda."

He grinned at you. "Feisty, I like that about you. Putting up a wall so nobody would know what you really think of others."

You only blinked slowly at him. What was he trying to get on about? Why were you even talking to him anyway?

"You'd be surprised." You shrugged his way.

And why were you entertaining him?

"You know, you're group is starting to become extinct rats. What are you going to do when they all died off?" Banda started making a good point.

"What? Am I supposed to say I'll ask for your help?" You asked suspiciously, a little offended.

"What else are you going to do?" He chuckled, soon turning to a dark point. "Just so you know, you don't have to trust in me. I have a feeling that my partner isn't telling me the 100% truth - and when your group dies down, you'd have no one to turn to."

"What are you trying to say?" You knew exactly what he was going to say.

"Why not help each other out? I do you a favor, you do mine."

"And what if you're the jack?"

"What if you're the jack?" Banda played along with signature smile.

Your eyes narrowed at him, a little pissed off. Two can play at this game. "Fine then," You crossed your arms on the table, "Suppose my group does die, and I do listen to your advice - What do you suppose you would do with me after? It's not like I'll easily trust a serial killer."

Banda sneered while placing both of his palms on the table and leaned closer to you, all up in your face with a snarl, "Sometimes, you make me lose my mind."

You leaned closer, "Too bad you already lost it."

With that you chose to stand up from your place at the table, not daring to look back at him. You could already tell he was starting to break character and the real, angry psychopath was starting to show. The true darkness and power that a man like him can hold over their victim. It was already on display at the very first second of this match - everyone was just blind.

But, much to his surprise, you turned around a little, not a full turn where your whole face was visible. You gave him a somewhat sympathetic smile - hard to know if it was fake or not.

"But, I'll be keeping your offer in mind." You chimed before waltzing your way out of the cafeteria with a racing heart.

Did you seriously just back-talked a criminal? Yes, Yes you did.

While you were busy feeling a little bit confident of yourself, which is quite suspicious and yet wrong in a game like this, you didn't notice a pair of eyes watching your back with dubiety.

After another round of this jack of hearts game, it felt like none of them was getting a speck closer into finding out who the jack might be. You gathered with your groupmates once again, waiting for your turn.

"So, what's my symbol?" You asked, trusting them.

"You're a... spade!" Urumi smiled innocently as she swayed lightly, her blue dress flying around lightly. Hand fiddling with the pink pocky stick in her hand.

Lie. Your head told you.

Your eyes widen in shock and terror as you processed the doom that you were in. For the very first time, you were being told a lie in your group.

After what seemed like hesitating more than confirming, the only members left of the group nodded their head and agreed on the symbol. The way they confirmed it was so transparent, you could tell how much of a lie it was, just because their tone of voice and their faces were all so fake.

But you decided to play along.

"Thank you." You nodded.

It didn't take long for the group to disband again, going their separate ways.

You went your own, really separate way alright. You went to Banda, much to your very own disappointment with your so called team.

,

"So you decided to finally come to terms, hm?" Banda played as he followed the lines of the brick walls in the small room in a hallway nobody would really bother to check, especially with a people of this amount left. He was very cocky.

"I said what I said, and I keep my word." You recalled, leaning against the wall with folded hands as you watched Banda slowly come closer to you, his index finger still tracing the dusty old grout.

Eventually, he got closer to you that he was practically 2 inches apart from your figure.

"Sounds trustworthy." He replaced his index finger with his whole palm, up against the wall. "Now I trust you'll tell me the truth?"

"I'll tell the truth if you do the same. I think you know that I'm more than capable to tell the difference between a truth and a lie. No matter how good you are, everybody always have a tell." You didn't meet his eyes yet, you stared off blankly into space but you were very confident and were true to your word.

Banda grinned at you, it made you look at him with your own blank eyes. "No strings attached?"

"No strings attached." You echoed back. Both you and Banda had agreed that both of you wouldn't try to control the other, just simply telling each other's symbols until the end of the game. After all, both of you know how many colors manipulation comes in.

"Your symbol is a heart." He answered.

Truth..

You walked behind him and read his collar, "Spade."

Sunato smiled once more at you, he seemed to trust your words. His partner must've answered the same so it was somewhat of a 100 percent chance for him to be alive this round but you knew that it wasn't going to be the end just yet. Someone was bound to lie some time.

Both of you then made your way to that cell room of yours, watching Urumi walk into her own as she smiled so sweetly your way before walking in.

What a bitch, you thought.

"Please answer your selected suit."

"Heart."

It was correct... The doors unlocked as soon as you realized you had survived. One by one, you heard doors open from the outside. You had counted the amount of players that were left, walking in their cells, so determining how many doors would be opened, it would tell you how many players had survived.

Unfortunately, another player seemed to have passed away. But it wasn't to your surprise.

The real surprise that was about to ensue was to Urumi, who was very shocked and quite pissed off that you were still alive. She had guessed that you had somebody else to trust other than her.

The way she watched you as you walked pass her through the cafeteria was just so full of hatred.

But the real threat to her was her groupmates. Not only were they losing faith in her - she was starting to lose trust in them. It was bound to be a lose-lose situation that would never seem to find its solution.

And as another few rounds went by, your conclusion was true.

Everybody from your group had disappeared, all with their necks blown off in the cells they all last departed to before their certain deaths.

It was a pity for all of them to have died. They wouldn't have had to die if only they were good enough to each other and speak nothing but the truth. But alas, none of them could trust the other.

Each round, usually when Banda's partner was long gone and off to the food section by himself, you would meet up with Banda where nobody else could see and exchange answers of the symbol on your collar and some other information both of you had gathered in safety of the other in the game.

You had told Banda that you had to team up with the white hooded boy with bleached-blonde hair who was formerly in your group but started phase out with the other guy with the yellow shirt. Both of which, you learned their names were Chishiya and Ippei. In order for you to not look suspicious in front of everybody else who was alive.

You couldn't help but feel bad for that one Ippei guy. He really was too kind for this world. It made you wonder how he got this far. Too bad he stranded in the Jack of Hearts game.

Sunato understood your reasons. For a serial killer, he was quite smooth with his words and made very good points from time to time. He was surprisingly a good person to chat with and pass the time.

Both of you learned each others aspects of being a serial killer and a psychiatrist, often play small and few rounds of a guessing game to figure out what the other thinks about or do or anything along those lines.

That's until what seemed like the last round came.

You were with Chishiya but Ippei had sadly passed away. He really shouldn't have been here in the first place. He didn't deserve it. You had a sure feeling that Chishiya was trustworthy enough to go through with your plan of surviving and you hoped that he didn't see you as a threat as well.

There was no real point in lying to him anyways.

In these few rounds, you've noticed how intelligent and observant he really was. It seems like the only last few who were left were the ones who stayed quiet and listened instead of going around and assuming others.

Both of you were sure that the jack was going to make the move.

Anyways, despite the fact you were with Chishiya, he told you not to tell him his symbol yet in order to get some answers from the people he seemed to suspect.

And as the plan went on smoothly, when everybody was gone from the small food section, you told each other your symbols and parted ways. You promised Banda that you'd meet up one last time in the same small room down the hallway.

"About time you showed up, I've been waiting here for 5 minutes." Banda turned around to you.

"And that's all the time it took for you to start losing your head up your ass, huh?" You teased back with unamused eyes.

He didn't really like that so he narrowed his eyes at you. Something he took from you, due to your little habit. "What happened?"

"Nothing much. I just had to do a plan with that Chishiya guy. Really helpful. You?"

"I also teamed up with another guy. Similar to ours. We both believe that we have many things in common." He answered willfully, everything coming out of his mouth was the truth.

It honestly stunned you, the fact hoe he actually was telling the truth about every word he tells you. You were just expecting more unsuspecting and cocky lies, same to everybody who had currently died at this game. Instead, you were met with a man who wanted to survive as much as you do. Maybe even as manipulative as you if you were.

"Reasonable. How sure are you that the guy you're with is the jack of hearts?" You asked.

"I mean considering the fact that you can tell the difference between a truth and a lie, shouldn't you know?" Banda sassed back at you, tilting his head with delight.

"I can tell the difference between a trustworthy prick and ally as well." You smiled at him exaggeratingly. You knew why he suspected his partner already but it couldn't hurt to know if your secret teammate knew why as well.

"When I said he was transparent from the start, I really meant it. He's clearly trying to act as if I have him under my control. The way he doesn't know the way I truly see him when he doesn't have a clue." Your partner says, all in the truth.

"Fair." You answered him. "I hate to say this for once but, hope you end up till end, Sunato. Just so you know, I really am saying the truth."

He nodded towards you before leaving the room first, never to be seen until the results of the last round.

Something tells you that you weren't the only one who felt and read the tension you had between the both of you. A deeper and more twisted and maybe even forbidden kind of tension. But it was the thing both of you had. But you couldn't say anything about it.

As the last few game matchers stepped into the last room of potential death, it took them almost a minute to find out who had won.

You answered your suit and you were more than relieved that your symbol was right and that you were ready to feel actual ground again and breath after this game. You could hear some laughter from outside, near your cell.

But despite trying to sound all so serious, you chuckled at his laugh. The jack was just right next door to you. How stupid.

One by one, you and the last other 3 players revealed yourselves to be alive as you told the jack of your clever plans and how much all of you had outsmarted him.

And in the end, before Sunato and that Yaba guy left into the cell to start their work, the last thing you saw was Banda's wink.

"We shall meet again, princess."

#alice in borderland #aib #alice in borderland x reader #aib x reader #sunato banda #sunato banda x reader #banda x reader #banda #aib sunato banda #aib banda #x reader #oneshot #box writes

[yevmarie]

Light My Fire | Chapter 1

Masterlist

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 >

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Female Reader

Pronouns: you, she/her

Word count: 1.4k

Warnings:

angst;

mentions of depression;

implied suicidal thoughts;

swearing;

a lot of smoking (by main character as well. Sorry for making it as a social aspect here, I hope you won’t get it as if I encourage you or something);

Merle being pervert;

some differences from the main plot may occur;

poor English (not a first language, but I’ll be glad if you point on the mistakes, also may skip the southern accent as I’m not aware of it too much :( ), and poor written skills in general.

If I miss something, please let me know. I hope you enjoy :).

___

Your eyes are closed and your body trembling, desperately trying to hold your tears.

“Y/N,” The soft and calm woman's voice tells you. “Let’s recall the rectangular breathing. Inhale…” You inhaled through your nose for four seconds and stopped breathing for four seconds as well. “Exhale…” You exhaled slowly and then held your breath again. “Inhale…”

“Fuck it!” you swore and opened your eyes, stretching out your arm to the Parliament pack lying on the kitchen island. You were not happy with this habit but when your life went to shit you didn’t care.

This had been an awful year full of loss which unfortunately led to depression. You visited your psychiatrist regularly and this helped you to overcome a bit. At least you don’t start suddenly crying and coped to move on. Especially when your best friend, like almost your older brother, got to the hospital and there was no good news about his health condition. As an aunt (non-blood relative) of his son, you couldn’t give up just like that. But it seemed if you had a chance, you’d do it.

You lit the cigarette, inhaled, and continued pouring the coffee from Jezve to the small thermos. This was your everyday morning routine. After this ritual, you go to the park and prepare yourself mentally for the new day. Today’s situation was different, you wouldn’t go to the park, but you couldn’t prevent yourself from beginning the day normally at least partially, and for the last time.

The TV was turned on, and the host said with a trembling voice thousands of people got infected with an unknown disease and it led to chaos in several states and yours as well, many people died. Neighbors outside were screaming, children were crying. Everyone was rushing and trying to pack all their lives in their cars. You thanked God your parents weren’t here. Sounds blasphemous, but you couldn’t bear this weight upon your shoulders. When you were imagining the apocalypse while having one of your anxiety attacks, you swore yourself you would end up right at the beginning as this would be not life anymore, but dance with the death you didn’t wish to take part in.

But you are here. Fortunately staying calm (thanks to medication). You already packed your things after your friend (your ex), had called you and asked you to be prepared to move. He told you he’d come to your house and you then follow him in your car. Also, in case he succeeds in grabbing your best friend from the hospital, you can transport him as he was unconscious, and more space was needed for sure.

The man dressed in a sheriff uniform enters your house “Are you kidding? Coffee, really? What about mediation then?” he saw you looking at him with no emotion expressed on your face. He cooled down for a moment. “Have you grabbed the essentials?” you nodded in the direction of the bag laying near the door.

“Is the tank full?”

“As usual,” you mumbled “Shane” you breathed the smoke out of your lungs “Are Lori and Carl with you?”

“Sure, come on. And quit this shit, please.” he pointed at the cigarette and went outside your house.

You closed the thermos, switched off the TV, and went to your garage. In several minutes you were following Shane’s car. Carl turned back to you from Shane’s backseat car window and waved to you. You smiled and waved in response. Thanks God your last lifeline was safe and sound. You switched on the player and drove.

“Time to die

Hammer high

Name your price

And kneel

Hail the apocalypse

All flesh is equal when burnt

We are forgiven

Forgive as we never shall learn

Get down

Hail the apocalypse”

Shane turned to the highway and you nervously turned the steering wheel following him. Your eyes widened in shock. You grabbed the phone and called him.

“What’s the matter?” you screamed.

“My colleagues told me there was a shoout-out near the hospital. Need you all to get to a safer place. We’ll deal with Rick later.” You threw your phone away after the call ended. “Shit”.

The trip was short but unbearably lasting as you were always stuck in traffic jams. You can see the sun already went under. As you saw the road was blocked with cars and people fussing you turned the engine down. Shane got out of his car and went further into the crowd. After five minutes you saw him getting back approaching you.

“We need to stop here, the road is blocked. Let’s have a break and figure out what to do next.” you nodded and got out of your car. Shane went to Lori to tell the same. Carl opened the door and ran to you.

“I’m glad you are with us, Y/N.” said Carl squeezing your waist. You brushed his hair gently with your fingers and smiled in response. “Me too…”

“Carl” Lori called “Could you please come to me for a second?” Carl looked at you, smiled, and ran to his mother while she was looking at you concerned.

You switched your attention from Lori and took the Parliament pack out of your denim jacket, picked a cigarette, and realized you forgot the lighter at home. You started to look around and your sight captured the two men smoking standing near their car in front of yours. You approached them.

“Hey, could I ask for a lighter, please? I forgot mine at home”. The older grinned, sticking the tip of his tongue while observing your hips in black leggings moving his sight up and stopping at your breasts covered with the tank top of the same color as your leggings. He looked up at your eyes and sang “Come on baby, light my fire”. The younger burst out of anger and barked.

“Have ya not slept offa hangover yet, dumbass?”

“Woah, brother,” the older laughed and lowered his voice “Why are ya so tensed?” The younger started nervously biting his lips while the older’s mouth was in front of his ear. “Getting nervous because of the beautiful girl talking to ya?”

“Shut the fuck up!”

You just continued to watch a one-man show.

“Okay, won’t bother ya, my puss,” he laughed and stared at you measuring you up “My brother is such a shy guy. Please keep an eye on him while I go and let off my steam ‘cause of the hotty around” he blinked at you.

The younger looked angrily at his brother going away down to the wooded area near the road.

“What a gentleman…” you concluded.

“I’m sorry,” the younger grunted and looked at you blushing.

“Never mind, at least someone stays positive.” you smiled. The man put his hand in the pocket of his jeans and took out a light passing to you. You lit up your cigarette and inhaled. The lungs burned with pleasure while your head went a bit fainty as you haven’t eaten anything today yet. “Thanks,” you said and then went back to your car. You opened the door and took the thermos with coffee and a small tourist cup. The man was standing quietly and glared at you as if his gaze was an X-Ray that could reveal anything suspicious about you.

“Hey,” you looked at the man while pouring the coffee into the cup “What’s your name?”

“Daryl” he didn’t stop gazing with his cold blue eyes.

“Y/N. Wanna some coffee?”

“No, thanks,” he mumbled.

“Come on,” you approached him “The night will be long, you need to stay on your legs.”

He looked at you thinking the hell this bothers you. You read his thought as his expression was asking and added “Let’s consider this as the gesture of thanks as you saved my life from the lack of nicotine.” You chuckled.

“Thanks” he replied silently not stopping investigating you.

“Bring it back to me when you finish” You pointed at the cup and turned to go away to Shane as he had called you.

The man stayed confused holding the cup and looking at you while you went away.

“What a sweetie, huh? I’d spent some time with her on the backseat” Merle let Daryl know about his presence.

“Fuck off!”

Merle laughed and sang gazing at you talking to your friends “You know that it would be untrue. You know that I would be a liar…”

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 >

#daryl dixon #daryl dixon x reader #daryl x reader #daryl dixon / reader #daryl dixon / you #daryl dixon x you #daryl / reader #daryl / you #daryl x you #daryl dixon fanfiction #Daryl dixon series #The Walking Dead #the walking dead series #the walking dead fic #twd #twd fanfiction #twd fanfic #norman reedus #daryl dixon fanfic #twd daryl #daryl dixon x female reader #daryl dixon x y/n

[crucipuzzled]

About Psychiatry stuff in SPYxFAMILY. Part 1

Part 2 here / Part 3 here / Part 4 here

I'm a dumb and I just realized that ch. 29 of the manga will be animated, since Fiona appears for the 1st time in that chapter and she's in the key visual for the 2nd cour.

I'm aware this isn't the first analysis made on this chapter but so far I haven't seen anyone from the Psy world speaking about this. I'm a Clinical Psychologist grounded on Freudian-Lacanian Psychoanalitic theory and I think I can share some knowledge over several aspects of Psychiatry that are depicted in the manga. I've worked with Psychiatrists in the past, albeit for a short amount of time, in a public healthcare institution, so I have a notion of what Psychiatrists do in a public setting like a Hospital.

If there's a Psychiatrist out there who wants to refute this analysis, PLEASE DO SO. I'm more than pleased to learn and have a nice debate.

This is one of the most hilarious chapters in the whole SxF series, so if you don't want the fun to be spoiled, please skip this post!

Let's begin. 1. Working in a Hospital

I'm not sure if this is universal, as healthcare systems around the world differ in several aspects, but the consensus is that a Hospital, which is a public healthcare institution, is specialized in the treatment of the most complex diseases.

In Psychiatry, this usually means dealing with psychosis, drug intoxication, major depressive episodes with suicide attempts and serious personality disorders. Most of these conditions require hospitalization, as the risk of giving just ambulatory care is not enough to guarantee the patient's safety or that of the others's.

There are Hospitals that provide ambulatory care though. Again, it varies from where in the world you are. In my country (Chile) you usually go to the Hospital when your life is at risk, but if you are suffering from a less serious condition (for example, dealing with panic attacks), you'll be transferred to a primary healthcare institution. Unless you live in a rural area.

Indeed, working in a healthcare institution means gaining access to any patient's clinical record. But for the objective of Operation Strix, and Loid being a Psychiatrist, I don't think that's of much use, for reasons that I'll cover in Point 3.

2. Specialty in Psychiatry

Psychiatry has several subspecialties, like any other healthcare career. You have Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, Adult Psychiatry (I believe these two are mandatory to become a Psychiatrist but I can't say it for sure), Addictions, Forensics, Emergencies... Loid said that he wants to help people affected by the war, veterans specially, so it's a polite guess to say that he's an Adult Psychiatrist. Then again, we have this panel:

The sand box is a diagnostic tool used for children. It's mostly used by Psychologists, as they have more time per session to analyze it. I'll cover the sand box in more detail in Part 4 of this series of analysis, but for now let's say that analyzing it consumes a lot of time that Psychiatrists, in a Hospital, usually don't have.

This panel suggests that Loid has worked with children before as a Psychiatrist, and we see him later in chapter 67 with a child (although it's not clear if the child is his patient), so here are another 2 polite guesses:

-Loid's a General Psychiatrist -Berlint General Hospital's Psychiatric Ward is understaffed and they put their Psychiatrists to do whatever is needed at the moment, regardless of their specialties. It sure doesn't look that poor of a Hospital to me, but who knows... My bet is option 1. Poor guy.

3. Donovan Desmond as a potential psychiatric patient

In the first chapter of the manga, Donovan is described as a hikikomori, meaning someone who withdraws from social interaction. This word also describes a psychopathological condition of japanese young lads that spend months, even years, holled up in their homes without interacting with anybody aside from their families (if they have). The word itself doesn't have a pathological connotation tough. In English, the closest concept to "hikikomori" as a psychpathological meaning would be Autism, which isn't equivalent at all. And, when a person is so reclused, we tend to pair it with paranoia, as it often leads to social withdrawal as well. The important thing here is, as you probably are thinking right now, the reason fo such decision. And this reason is always given by the symptoms. Paranoia is a type of psychosis in which a person suffers from delirium and hallucinations related to being endangered or threatened by something. Of course, a proof of reality is useless for these patients, as their perception of reality itself is disturbed. An UFO is watching over you at all times? I can't precisely prove that it's false, as I lack proof of the very existence of UFO, and even if I have it, the delirium would probably shift to attack me as I turn into a conspirator against the patient's truth.

Not that we clinicians waste time trying to do so, though. In these cases, the Psychiatrist kicks in and administers a dose of antipsychotic drugs. Psychotic paranoia often needs hospitalization and a strong compromise from the patient's family to constantly supervise him/her. After that, comes a long process of social rehab. A very characteristic feat of paranoid people is that THEY NEVER SEEK FOR PROFESSIONAL MENTAL HEALTH CARE HELP BY THEMSELVES. Paranoids often arrive to a Psychiatric Emergency Room dragged by a third party due to bizarre behaviour, self-aggression and/or attempts to hurt others.

There are people that is not psychotic and suffer from this kind of fear of pretty much everything as well, but it's hard to determine if they really aren't psychotics, as their reasons to recluse themselves strongly resemble a delirium. The key that helps to discern if it's a psychotic paranoia or not is finding the hole in which a patient allows himself to doubt. In paranoid psychosis there's absolute certainty, while in neurosis there is room for doubt.

These "neurotic paranoids", as we'll call them for now (it doesn't exist as a nosograhical entity anywhere; please don't waste your time looking it up in the DSM xD), tend to abandon therapy pretty soon, as they fight for sticking with their motives to recluse themselves. They don't want to realize what drive them to behave like that. Patients suffering from obsessions will probably act this way, as well as some hypochondriac and anorexic patients. Bear in mind that this is not a norm; everything depends on the symptoms.

All of this begs the question: Would Donovan Desmond ever need Psychiatric help from Dr. Loid Forger?

His interaction with Loid in chapter 38 suggests that he's not reclusive for a mental condition, but he does have a certain level of "neurotic paranoia", as he can't bring himself to really trust any other person much. If nobody is truly sympathetic to each other, they could pose a threat at any moment, right? Since he's clearly not psychotic, because he can hold an interaction with Loid in the same shared reality (not a dellirium, I mean), one can safely assume that he does trust someone, at least one single person. When a psychotic person suffers from paranoia, there's not a single hole in their life that is not filled with suspicions of others being dangerous. This isn't the case for Donovan.

We see him walking with a lot of guards, so he must trusts them. And he seems to be closer to Demetrius as he goes with him to the Imperial Scholar get-togethers, so that also counts. He even takes a detour to meet Damian. Seems like he can trust his family members, and that alone could be a measure of love, albeit in a really weird scale.

Tsundere? That aside, given the social status of the Desmonds, if they ever need psychiatric help, they probably would consult a private clinic instead of going to a public hospital. Unless they find themselves in a reeeeaaaally desperate situation. So, the answer is no... for the most part. Good try, though, Twilight.

I'll cover more stuff in the next part. This one turned out unexpectedly long. It's been fun ruining the fun for those who don't know about mental health though.

#spy x family #spy x family manga #psychiatry #analysis #This is what happens when I don't have a job

[aestaetico]

hey, love me now | yandere! mental patient! han jisung

— pairing; yandere! mental patient! han jisung x reader

— word count; 5.9 k

— summary; his laughter, his crazed smile, the way he looks at you with love and bloodlust at the same time. all jisung wants is for you to love him back and doctor, not even those silly little chains will hold him back from touching you and begging you to love him now.

— warnings; obsessive themes, killing, violence, language, yandere themes

“Your patient is here,” the nurse says to you, gesturing to the white door in front of you. She offers you a sympathetic and encouraging smile. “Jisung’s a sweetie, but he’s also a tough one to handle. You have to be extra patient with him.”

You return the smile. “Thanks, I will.” And with that she takes her leave, leaving you alone. You take a deep breath and adjust your white coat. You were a fairly young psychologist, having graduated at a fresh age of 20. It was normal to be nervous; today is the first day of your first job and you didn’t have any experience to rely on.

You take a deep breath and look at the clipboard once more. Han Jisung, aged 19, was placed in the mental hospital at 15 and was just recently diagnosed with antisocial personality disorder at 18. You click your tongue. Poor kid, you sympathize as you check his headshot. He looked pale and bony as if he hadn’t eaten. He was pleasing to the eye though, even if he had sunken cheekbones due to malnutrition.

You push the door open and carefully take a step inside. You see a boy staring blankly at the wall and you flinch when his blank eyes turn to look at you.

But after two second his eyes quickly brighten up and he jumps out of bed and stands. His eyes are sparkling when he sees you, and you see no danger in him.

His condition looks worse up close. His black hair has gone limp and dull and he looks paler and skin than he did in the pictures, but you can also feel the charismatic persona that has so often been mentioned in the fires.

“Are you my new psychiatrist?” Jisung asks. You nod, not knowing what to say at the moment. He motions for you to come closer. “Can you come nearer? I’m not exactly permitted to be free, you know?” He tugs on something with his leg and a clunking noise is heard.

China’s link Jisung’s right leg to the foot of his bed. He must be pretty dangerous then if he needed to be chained, you think, but you take up the offered space on the bed and mustered up your friendliest smile.

“I’m Ahn [Your Name],” you greet. “I’ll be your new psychologist. I’m curious, but what happened to your previous one?”

Jisung smiles. “They didn’t tell you?” He asks. You nod. “I almost killed him. Barely got out of this room with a bleeding torso and half-shattered rib cage and demanded to get out of the hospital. He better be grateful he go out alive.” Jisung shrugs. “It’s his fault anyway. Bringing up my past as if I was the one who was at fault.”

You look around the empty white room. “What did you use? There’s nothing here.”

“There used to be a lamp.” He jerks his thumb towards the bedside table. “It’s gone now.”

“Well, did you try to kill someone with a chair?” You joke, talking about the absence of chairs in the room.

“Shattered their skill in,” Jisung replied. You freeze, not really expecting that kind of answer. “They’re dead now. Brain damage. They were too aggressive for me.”

You clear your throat awkwardly. “Well, um,” you cough. “I didn’t expect that.”

His eyes glint with some kind of malice. “They didn’t either.”

You force a dry laugh before Jisung changes demeanor. He cocks his head like a child. “Why do you ask?”

“I’m not sure myself,” you say. “But I guess I learned from it. I won’t make the same mistakes as them.” You reach up and ruffle his hair. “I’ll take good care if you, okay, Jisung?”

A nice, warm feeling spreads through Jisung’s body. “Okay, noona.”

Jisung is a handsome and charming man, something to be expected from a person diagnosed with ASPD. But he was too pale and skinny to be even healthy and you wondered if the hospital was even feeding him correctly.

“Minyoung-unnie!” you call out to a fellow doctor. The said doctor turns around to look at you. You keep up with her until you both walk side by side down the hall. “It’s great to see you again!”

Minyoung is a doctor who showed you around when you applied for the job. The two of you quickly clicked and has kept in contact ever since. Today is your first day seeing her as a newbie on the job

“It is,” she agrees. “Is today your first day on the job?”

You nod. “Yup! I got Han Jisung as my patient!”

Her brows furrow in worry. “Oh my, Han Jisung? That kid’s really problematic. His past few psychologists have suffered quite a lot or have even ended up dead.” She shakes her head. “What were they thinking, assigning a rookie like you to such a complicated subject?”

You laugh and wave it off. “Don’t worry about it, unnie! Jisung and I got along pretty well!” You turn quiet again and look forward. “Anyway, that’s what I came to you about. Jisung’s pretty thin and pale to be healthy. Is the hospital… feeding him alright? I’m kinda worried.”

Minyoung sighs. “The hospital used to give him full plates of food before, but after his encounter with his last psychologist, he refused to eat. We were able to force him to eat some though, but he took only small bites and that was it. They didn’t want to waste any food so they gave him small portions of food from then on.”

“Poor guy,” you pity. “He must have had it rough.”

“I know,” Minyoung agrees with you and puts a hand on your shoulder. “He needs someone who’ll understand him perfectly. You’ll be great for that, [Your Name]-ah.”

You beam at her, eyes brightening up with eagerness. “I’ll do my best.”

“What’s this?” Jisung asks, eyeing the plate full of food in front of him. You’ve set the plate full of grilled pork, grilled beans and corn, and a side dish of kimbap for him to eat all up.

“Your lunch,” you calmly reply, flipping through Jisung’s database. He frowns and looks at you.

“I’ve already eaten though,” he says. You look up from the papers and stare at him.

“I don’t think eating less than half of a healthy diet is called lunch, Jisung,” you retort. You set down the papers and fold your hands together, a habit of yours whenever you start talking seriously. “Jisung, if you keep on eating at this rate, you’ll get severely sick and die.”

“It’s okay anyway,” he mumbles, curling up into himself. “I’ve been doing it for the past month. Nothing will happen if I die anyway.”

It’s a sign of his depression, you take note, and your eyes flicker to him. He looks sad and stressed, different from how overly bright he was this morning. His last psychologist must’ve dampened his spirits.

“Come on, Jisung,” you prod him. “You know that’s not true. I’d be greatly affected if you’d die.”

“As if,” he says quite blatantly. “You just met me today.”

“Well, yeah, and I’m looking forward to meeting you every day after this one.” You smile brightly and place a hand on his knee. “I told you a while ago, didn’t I? I’ll take care of you.” You gingerly pinch his cheeks and lean back into your chair, flipping again through your data whilst waiting for him to eat.

Jisung blushes, placing a hand on his warm cheek. The feeling of your fingers is still there… and it’s an actually nice feeling.

Deciding to obey your words, he reaches out for his lunch and begins stuffing himself.

He munches a bit noisily, distracting you from your papers but instead to your patient. He started off a bit slow, hesitant to touch the food but once he’s had three spoons he began feeding himself at a fast rate. His cheeks are full, and you laugh to yourself.

He looks up from his plate and stares at you with brows furrowed. “What?”

You wave it off, still chuckling into your palm. “It’s nothing. You just look so cute right now.”

“I-I–” Jisung feels his blush intensify at the feeling of having a noona compliment him. His heart’s pace picks up and he quickly drops his gaze to the food and stuff himself even more with a fiery red evident on his face.

Today was a breeze with Jisung.

You’ve decided to settle on the less personal topics, such as how he’d been feeling these past months and other questions that checked up on his emotional wellbeing. Yet today had also drained your energy, and you went to sleep as soon as your head hit the sack.

Jisung, on the other hand, had difficulty falling asleep.

He can still feel your fingers pinching his cheeks, and your hand messing up your hair. He can still see the sincerity in your eyes, and hear how your laugh goes and oh my god his thoughts were just filled with you and you and you and you.

He places a hand over his heart and feels how fast it’s going. At this rate, he’s never going to fall asleep at all.

He launches up from his bed and kicks his blanket. Oh god, he inhales and exhales, but is not doing him any good. Oh god. My heart is beating too fast.

He’s feeling overwhelmed by the sudden emotions.

Your face flashes in his mind once more and he can’t take it. He buries his head into his pillow groans.

Is this love at first sight?

Obviously.

“Noona!” Jisung voice chirps brightly when you enter the room. Your mood immediately brightens when you hear him in such a pleasant mood this morning.

“Hello, Jisung-ah,” you say lovingly. You ruffle his hair like yesterday (Can they blame you? His hair is unbelievably soft. You take note to ask the hospital what shampoo they give to the patients), and he grins as you do. He likes it when you do that.

He sits cross-legged on his bed, his white pajamas inching up just enough for you to see the iron cuff clamped on his right leg. His big doe eyes look up at you and you notice some bags under his eyes.

“Jisung?” You call his name worriedly. He blinks at you and responds with a ‘hm?’.

“Did you get enough sleep? You look tired.” His hands immediately reach up to his eyes and he instantly begins to worry. Did he not look presentable to you? He must look like trash right now.

“I-I’m sorry,” he mumbles. “I had a hard time sleeping last night.”

“Aigoo, my poor Jisung.” You shake your head and sit next to him. His heart flutters when you say that. Having someone care for him is a distant memory, and unlike those psychologists who came to him with phony smiles, there’s something about you that makes him really think that you care for him.

“Get some sleep tonight Jisung, okay?” He nods obediently and faces you on the bed. “Now, we’ll be doing some relaxing exercises that’ll help calm you down before I ask you some sensitive questions. Is that okay with you?”

He flinches when he hears sensitive questions, but he mumbles a ‘yes’ and gets on with it. You give him some breathing and anxiety exercises. He feels the tension in his shoulders lessening, and he’s almost forgotten about what comes after. He supposes it’s not really the exercises that help but just your mere presence.

“Okay, Jisung,” you say softly. He opens his eyes and looks into yours. A comforting shade of [Eye Color] that welcomes him in. “Tell me what happened on the fourth of December.” He flinches when he hears the date, the memories swarming in. Psychologists always ask him that, and reliving the memory is just as painful every time.

You notice how his muscles stiffen again and rub comfortingly at his back. “It’s okay, Jisung-ah, I’m not here to judge. I’m here as your friend. Come on, don’t be ashamed.”

He hesitates for a very long time. He holds his breath and squeezes his eye shut. The fourth of December, a painful date that turned his whole life upside down.

His first kill.

“I-I didn’t mean it,” he stutters. You keep on rubbing circles on his back, eyes silently prodding him to go on. “Really. I was only trying to protect myself from them.”

You know exactly who ‘them’ is, it says it all in your database, but you urge him for more. “Who exactly is ‘them,’ Jisung?”

He stays silent. He doesn’t wanna talk about it.

You sigh. “It’s okay if you don’t wanna talk about it, but I need you to talk to me so I can help you, Jisung.”

“You already have all the information the hospital has on me,” he mutters. He caught you right there.

“That’s not what I meant,” you exhale, laying your eyes on Jisung. He’s not looking at you, opting to stare at the blindingly white bed sheets instead of you. You can tell that this topic is really uncomfortable for him, but you want to make him trust you with his feelings as soon as possible. “I need you to open up to me so I can tell what you’re really hiding, Jisung. And from that, I’ll help fix all your problems with you.”

He sniffs. Oh, you think as he lifts his wavering eyes to you. Right now he’s reliving memories of the past, each memory and scene seeming to drag on slowly and painfully. “D-Do you promise not to treat me badly like all the other psychologists?”

You offer a genuine smile, gingerly taking his hands in yours and squeeze. He squeezes back, though weaker than yours. “Of course, Jisung-ah. I like you too much already to do so.”

His heart flutters.

“Jisung!” You enter the room smilingly six months later, rid of your long white coat and wearing casual clothes. Jisung hops out of bed, the chains clanking along with his movements. Here he is now, more color into his cheeks and having gained some weight. He’s no longer the pale and bony thing you’ve encountered all those months ago.

He eyes your clothing questioningly and you take heed of his stare. You chuckle and explain the situation at hand. “Well, you kept on complaining to me about how much you wanted to see the world again so I personally asked the hospital if you were allowed to go outside again!” His eyes brighten up at your words. “They were amazed with my progress to you, so as a reward to the both of us they said yes!”

“Th-they did?” He sputters and he can hardly believe his ears right now. Four years of being confined within these walls with only the hospital area to roam around had him craving for even a whiff of the outside. And now it’s finally coming to him. Ah, he can smell the fresh air and the people’s smiling faces and the city’s hecticness. And most importantly, he’s going to spend it with the girl he likes the most.

“Yes, they did!” You grin at him and he can’t help but grin back. You hand him clothes the hospital gave you, pat them. “Check the pockets, Jisung.” You wink at him, and he can’t help himself but get curious. He feels the pockets for something and freezes when he feels something solid and hard in them. He knows what that is, but he can hardly contain his surprise. He locks eyes with you, mouth agape, before hurriedly reaching in the pocket and pulling out a sleek, silver key.

“No…” he whispers so softly you can barely hear it. He turns it around in his palm, still not believing it. His hand trembles and his eyes go watery.

It’s just a key, people might say. But this isn’t just any key.

“Come on,” you urge him on. “You deserve it.”

He takes a deep breath to compose himself, though it barely does him any good because he’s still shaking when he sits back on the bed and brings his right leg up. He sees the keyhole and aligns the key with it, before putting it in and twisting it. The clank of the shackles unlocking echoes through the air, and they fall to the floor with a metallic clang.

Jisung unsteadily stands up. He can still feel the ghost shackles on his ankle, and he slowly moves his leg up and down. He doesn’t hear the clinking of the chains.

He tries to gulp down his emotions before lunging at you, hugging you real tight and close. He sobs into your shoulder, tears wetting your clothes, not that you mind. “Thanks so much, noona…” He hugs you tighter than thought possible and you return the hug. “I love you so much.”

His mouth runs faster than his brain, and it’s only a matter of seconds before he fully realizes what he said. He pulls away to apologize but you intertwine your hands and gaze into his blotched red eyes. “I love you too, Jisung-ah.”

He was ecstatic to hear that, but it fades away when he sees the soft smile on your lips and the fond look in your eyes.

You didn’t mean it like that.

“W-wait,” he stutters as you pull him off the subway train and into the busy little streets of a district. His heart flutters when you tighten your grip on his arm. He’s currently a bit unsteady and uncomfortable, due to the fact that he hadn’t been outside for so long.

You stop abruptly. “Are you scared, Jisung-ah?” You tease. Jisung thinks that you look more beautiful right now than he’s ever seen before. Your smile is brighter and makes your face light up with such youth that it makes him want to pull you in for a hug.

“No…” His voice trails off. He looks around and sees couples sharing drinks with each other, holding hands with each other, and laughing with each other. He looks down at his hands, his long fingers tangled in yours. A thought hits him, and it makes him all wobbly on the inside.

Is… He goes red at the thought. Is this a date?

He quickly slaps himself on the cheek and internally curses himself for the thought. You look at him with a confused look. “Are… you okay?”

“I’m fine, noona!” He quickly blurts out, covering up his flustered state with a heart-shaped smile. He points at a sweet-looking candy shop, the windows displaying chocolate fountains and rock candies to tempt children and the sweet-toothed people to come inside. “Can we go inside there?”

“Sure!” You exclaim, eager to comply with Jisung’s requests. Today is a special day for him after all.

Jisung is charming and witty, something to be expected from someone with a diagnosis such as his. But today you forget that somewhere in his brain he’s got a few screws loose, and instead, you take pleasure in his delightful company.

The younger boy has taken advantage of the situation, knowing full well that a day like this would go to waste if he just kept on stuttering and acting shy. As the day progresses he grows bolder and bolder, wrapping his arms around your shoulders since he’s about two to three inches taller than you, closing the distance between both of you at times, and being a flirtatious shit overall.

But you’re a generally touchy person, so these interactions come off as normal to you. He’s disappointed when you don’t react to his advances, but that doesn’t stop him.

In the end, however, he failed. When the moon starts to rise, you drop him off at his room, and he’s confined again within the cold walls of his room.

“I had a fun time today, Jisung-ah,” you say with a jovial tone. The joy in your tone makes him happy that you had fun with him, and his lips curl into a smile.

“Me too,” he replies. You shut the door of the room after a wave and his eyes darken and his lips form a black scowl.

He kicks the wall hard and curses. He runs his hands through his hair and flops on his bed. He hugs a pillow and buries his head in it, imagining your warmth, the caress of your hands, and that warm tune you always hum under your breath. His sudden anger slowly goes back down, the thought of you relaxing.

“Noona,” he whimpers, gripping the pillow tighter and tighter. “Please love me now.”

It’s his fourth time outside with you.

Every time you go out, it’s always a new experience. He’d gone to the districts, the mall, and the river with you. He used to know these places, but throughout all the years he’d been locked away, Incheon became nothing more but a faded memory to him.

Today both of you were headed for the amusement park that was open for the week. You’d gotten a small amount of sleep last night, the hospital dumping you with papers that took you four hours to look over. So now you were asleep on Jisung’s shoulders in the subway, lips slightly apart as soft snores came out of them.

He stares at those lips. They look so… kissable. He imagines pressing his lips on yours, imagines how it’d feel like. Would his first kiss with you be chaste, a swarm of butterflies flitting around his stomach stopping him from kissing you any further? Or would it be long and sweet, eyes closed and a million sparks zapping through his veins.

Or would it be hard–

No, he reprimands himself. I’m underaged.

In the midst of his thoughts, you stir beside him, feeling refreshed though a bit drowsy. He snaps out of his thoughts when you raise your head and rub at your eyes, letting a small yawn out.

“Are we there yet Jisung?” You ask through yawns.

“Only a stop away, noona,” he answers with a candy sweet tone. He stays silent, eyes silently traced on you.

“Noona,” he quietly calls you, and you him to acknowledge him. “Did you have your first kiss yet?”

The surprising question snaps you out of your sleepy daze. You chuckle nervously, thinking that your patient may be teasing you, but you see the serious look in his eyes and the chuckling fades away. “I- ah…” It’s embarrassing to think about it, actually. You, 20-years-old and gone through college, had never kissed the lips of another boy (or girl.You might be bisexual).

“I’ve never kissed anyone in my entire life actually…” You mutter. You see his face light up when you say that and was about to question him about that particular question when the train reaches your stop.

“Ah, noona, we’re here!” He exclaims, jumping up from his seat. His eyes are wide with excitement, and you smile fondly. He must be really looking forward to the amusement park.

But really, he’s just happy no one has yet to experience your lips yet.

The day almost turns into night, and Jisung, an obvious romantic, wants to ride the Ferris wheel to watch the sunset and give way to the moon and the stars.

It’s a big Ferris wheel, with the top being really high up above the ground. The sky adorns an ombré painting of purple, pink, yellow, and orange. Jisung presses his face to the window and drinks in the sight. It’s pretty, and he uses every second to admire it.

He turns to you and finds that you are, unsurprisingly, much prettier than the sunset. The warm hues outside paint you in a shade of golden brown, your beauty more exhilarating than ever before. He stops breathing for a moment there because more than anything he just wants to pull you in tight and drink in your lips.

You’re in a faraway place, lost in your thoughts. He pouts because he wants your attention, so he switches his position and sidles up to you.

“Noona~” He whines, rubbing his cheek with yours. You laugh and lean on him. “Is something wrong?”

“No, nothing,” you murmur. “It’s just that… you started out as a patient and now you’re one of the closest people I have.” Jisung is definitely pleased to hear that he’s wormed his way into your heart in a matter of months.

“Well, I’m grateful that you take care of me, noona,” he chirps and drapes an arm around you. “I feel happier than before.”

The two of you share a comfortable silence, staring out into the ombre sunset with complete peace in your minds.

“Hey, Jisung,” your soft voice calls for him as the ride dips down and returns you back to land.

“Hm?” He turns his head to look at you, but he freezes still when he feels your lips peck his cheek with a small ‘mwah’. He’s completely red now, not just his face but also his neck.

His shaking pupils are blown wide, and you giggle at the expression on his face. “You were asking me about it a while ago so…” You rub your hands together nervously and look down on your lap. “It’s a small thank you. A token of my trust.”

Clearly, you don’t mean it romantically, which may have dampened his mood if he wasn’t too high up in the clouds.

Sixth time.

It’s his sixth time and so far nothing bad has happened. But when Jisung sees this man eyeing your body like it was fucking dessert, all sense is quickly thrown out the window and he fists the collar of the man, eyes hot as coal as he glares at him.

“You get your eyes away from her, you fucking perv,” he seethes. You panic and try to come in between them, hoping to calm Jisung down.

“Jisung stop!” You plead only for your voice to fall on deaf ears. “You’re causing a scene!”

None of them seem to hear you as the stranger only continues to aggravate Jisung further, grinning at him toothily as if the situation right now isn’t such a big deal. “What’s got your panties up in a twist, kid?” He mocks and laughs raspily. “Afraid that I’ll show your girl a better time than you do?”

Jisung’s face is red. And not the kind of red you make him experience, but an angry kind of red, the one that makes his head pound and his ears fill with intense ringing. He throws a punch across the guy’s face and kicks him down to the ground. Out on the sidewalk pavement, there seems to be no officer around, only gawking passersby who offer not much help to the current situation.

The guy groans and tries to stand up, but Jisung grabs his hair and leers down at him. “You watch your fucking mouth geezer, before I wash it out with your goddamn blood, got it?”

The man opens his mouth to bite back, but he slams his head to the ground and knocks him out unconscious. Jisung spits at the body and looks up, only to see a guard with handcuffs and your shaking eyes.

After that week, he was hauled into that cold and dark room of his again, and for the next following week, he was only allowed to food and bath and nothing more.

He was chained again too, but chains were the least of his problems. He paced around as far as his confinements could let him, biting on his teeth and pulling at his skin, asking himself the same question and shouting it so loud he just knows the people outside can hear him:

Where is [Your Name]

He can’t do it. He can’t. He can’t survive days without seeing you, not being able to bask in the glow of your smile, the warmth of your skin, your everything. He pulls at his hair and bangs his head as hard as he can against the wall.

Where are you?

Where are you?

Where are you?

W h E re A re You??? God, god, god. Fuck, he can’t handle this anymore. He wants you beside him there and now, and if he isn’t going to get you at that instant he was gonna kill himself with whatever he can find. It’d be so easy for him to get creative with his bare surroundings.

“Jisung?”

“Noona!” He cries out and jumps from his bed. You’re shocked at what you see— a disheveled and crazed looking Jisung, who’s even paler and thinner than you’ve ever seen him before. Upon a closer look, you see that his nails have been bitten away, his arms bruised, and a faint trickle of blood at the side of his head.

“The guy’s been banging himself against the wall all week,” the nurse tells you, clicking her tongue. “Yelling your name out too. God, he’s a wreck.”

You ignore her remarks. “Thank you, I can handle myself from here on,” you say to her. She nods and closes the door, but you know that she and a handful of other nurses will be standing near the door in case something happens. The door clicks softly, and it’s only you and him now.

You can feel his beady eyes boring into your skin, and can hear the slight chatter of his teeth. “Noona?” He calls out timidly. “Are… you going to leave me again? Please don’t! I’m so sorry. I won’t do it again, I promise!”

“Shh… shh,” you quiet him, stroking his hair softly. He melts into your touch. He misses the feeling of your hands caressing him. “We’ll talk, okay? I have to tell you something.”

A whine almost erupts from his throat when you pull your hand away, but he forces it down. You take a seat on the bed, but you’re still too far away for his liking. You take a moment to prepare yourself, inhaling deeply before letting out an exhale. “Jisung-ah,” you start, and he doesn’t like how serious your tone is. He’s so used to it being so light and warm and airy. “The hospital looked over the incident that week and they’ve come to the conclusion that I shouldn’t be your psychologist anymore.”

“What?!” He cries out. His eyes are almost popping out of their sockets at what you had just said. “No no no no no no no no…” He mutters under his breath, body shaking. “You can’t leave me! You’re the only one I have! Please don’t do this to me!” He begs you, crawling over to you and takes your hand in his. You peel your eyes away from him and tug your hand away. You stand up from the bed.

“I’m sorry, Jisung, but our relationship is just making you even worse.” He shakes his head forcefully, denying that statement.

“No, of course it isn’t! It’s helping me, see? It’s helping me…” He laughs drily, the sound bare of any emotion. “Come on, noona…. Didn’t you say before that you’ll take care of me? That you care about me? I love you so, so much!”

“I’m sorry,” you mumble. You can’t bear to listen to him anymore. “I have to leave.”

“No!” He shrieks. “No, you can’t! I’ll force you here beside me! Noona, you love me, right? You love me, you have to!”

Your breath hitches. “I can’t love you like this,” you tell him, voice cracking.

He chokes on a sob, thrashing around in his chains. “You can’t do this to me! You can’t! We were friends! We were lovers! Are you just going to throw me away like this?”

A forceful tug of his right leg suddenly makes his leg feel a lot lighter. He looks back to where the chain is attached to the wall. He successfully broke it, and he doesn’t waste a second to bring you into his arms. You struggle to get away a cry of help ripping out from your throat. The nurses quickly run into the room and holds Jisung back from you. You gasp as you break free from his arms, but he’s still thrashing around the arms of numerous nurses. One of them loads liquid into a needle, but his eyes stay on you, deep and desperate.

“You can get away now.” His eyes are crazed and his lips curl into a feral smile. “But sooner or later I’ll find you. And you’ll love me.”

The needle pierces into his skin, and he blacks out.

It’s been less than a year since that event that happened with Jisung. You’ve moved on and pushed it to the back of your mind. You’ve resigned from the hospital, who were incredibly sad with your leave but understood your intentions.

Inside the comforts of your home, you lounge on the couch with a bowl of popcorn in hand. You stare listlessly at the television and tap your hands impatiently on the side table’s flat surface. Your boyfriend is taking years to change into his pajamas inside your bedroom.

But the ambient silence of your room goes away when a loud thud and a scream comes from your room. You jolt up, eyes wide and stare at your bedroom door.

“[Your Name]!” Your boyfriend yells from behind the door. “[Your–]”

He’s cut off mid-scream. Nothing comes after that.

Your legs are wobbly as you lift yourself from your couch and slowly make your way to the door. It’s a bad decision, you know, but you find yourself compelled to do it.

You twist the knob and slowly open it, the door creaking as you do. A gasp leaves your lips, and you recoil. Your boyfriend’s body lies on the wooden floor, eyes wide open in shock and an obvious stab wound in between his eyes. A black hooded figure stands by his corpse, a knife in hand. The metal blade is dripping with blood, and it makes a pitter-patter sound as each droplet slides down to the floor.

He lifts his hood and you stop breathing.

Jisung lifts his eyes and grin at you, face splattered with your love’s blood. His eyes are dull and blown wide with bloodlust.

“Noona,” he croons, voice sickly sweet as ever. “I’m here. Do you still love me?”

“I–” you choke on air, barely believing what is happening right now.

“Come on, noona.” He takes a step towards you. “I blew up the hospital just for you.”

“This can’t be happening,” you murmur but he cackles at you.

“It is happening!” He says with a jovial tone. He’s sick in the head, definitely. “Say it, noona. Say that you love me.”

“I can’t!” You gasp, inching away from him. “Jisung, I don’t love you!”

His eyes darken and they narrow themselves at you. He pulls you by the wrist and kisses you deeply and earnestly. You scream into his mouth, but he presses even further you can’t breathe. He pulls away at last and presses his forehead on yours.

“Hey, love me now,” he whimpers, and you can see the sincerity and genuine love in his eyes that you soften. But his expression quickly changes into pure sadism, and he seizes your throat so hard that bruises are bound to form.

“Or else there’ll be dire consequences. You understand that, right?”

--

-

IMPORTANT NOTE: none of this is written by me (aestaetico)! this is meant to be a repost/archive of @aestaetic-co (who has deleted their blog)’s original work. please don’t credit me for it!! also i painstakingly searched for crumbs of their blog for 3 hours on 4 different wayback machines and this is the only fic i could find so </3 lmk if you have a copy of any work done by them you would like me to upload+compile into a masterlist! 

DISCLAIMER: yes i know.. (sorry author) it is kinda problematic to write about a real person like this and romanticise mental issues+yandere things,, but tbh it is a very nice piece of work by itself if you just pretend you do not see it (also its kind of just fiction) anyway i didn’t change anything to respect the author and the work so if u wanna change it just do it urself 😓

#yandere kpop #yandere stray kids #stray kids #stray kids x reader #stray kids imagines #stray kids fanfiction #stray kids masterlist #han jisung #yandere han jisung #aestaetic-co #mental patient! han jisung

[bratzforchris]

Hi, hope you’re having a good day so far☀️

Could I request a fic (Luke x reader) where Luke’s autistic and how she helps him when he gets overwhelmed. Like in public or if he’s had a bad day or something like that. You have free reigns cause I’m extremely tired and couldn’t come up with anything better😅💞

My Ray of Sunshine

❃

Summary: Above

Pairing: Luke x feminine reader

Warnings: Autistic meltdown, borderline panic attack

Word Count: 913

A/N: Thank you so, so much for the request! Neurodivergent!Luke is my favorite thing ever :)

❃

“Do we have to?” Luke asked nervously, picking at his lip. 

You placed a hand on his shaking thigh for a comforting gesture, rubbing up and down. “I’m afraid so, honey. I know it’s so hard, but afterwards, we can go home and you can relax, okay?”

“I don’t want to. It’s gonna be loud.” he said, voice shaking slightly. 

“That’s why you have your headphones, my love,” You reminded him gently. “I’ll be there to help you, too.”

You and Luke were currently in the parking lot of the grocery store, waiting for him to get comfortable enough to go in. You normally wouldn’t bring him to the grocery store with you because of how much sensory overload it gave him, but you really needed some vegetables for dinner tonight and you two were already by the store after his psychiatrist appointment. 

To be completely honest, Luke being autistic had never, ever affected you negatively. He wasn’t wrong or broken, his brain just worked differently. He was by far the sweetest, most loving boyfriend you had ever had and you treasured him for that. 

“Everyone’s gonna look at me funny…” he said, starting to tear up. 

You cooed, rubbing his arm gently. “They’re just disrespectful idiots, Lu. There’s nothing wrong with accommodating your own needs, baby.” 

Luke sniffled, wiping his tears with the heels of his hands. “I’m ready.” he whispered softly. 

You gave him an encouraging smile and helped him out of the car, holding his hand throughout the parking lot while his other hand played with his fidget necklace. However, your feelings of confidence about Luke being able to handle the store diminished when you stepped inside. 

It was beyond crowded, and there were quite a few children screaming as their parents desperately tried to shop. You glanced up at Luke, already feeling your heart breaking. His shoulders had hunched significantly and he was holding his headphones to his ears, eyes wide with anxiety. You grabbed a cart quickly, knowing you needed to keep a level head right now. 

“C’mon, Lu. Let’s get what we need so we can get home.” You encouraged him. 

Luke held onto the cart, practically gluing himself to your side as you shopped. It wasn’t long before you felt a small tug at your shirt while you were grabbing berries. You turned around to face Luke and nearly cried at the sight you saw. The poor boy had silent tears running down his

face as he hit himself in the chin with his fist, desperately trying to rid himself of the overstimulation. 

“Oh honey,” You cooed. “I’m so sorry, sweetie. I didn’t even notice you weren’t feeling good. Come on, bubba. Let’s go home.” You completely abandoned your cart, taking Luke’s hand and leading him towards the exit at the front of the store. 

‘I wanna go home’ he signed pitifully to you, signifying that he was nonverbal at the moment. 

“We’re going, sweetie,” You said gently as you two stepped out into the parking lot. “Try to take some deep breaths, my love. In through your nose, your through your mouth.”  The blond was trying his hardest, but he was so overwhelmed at the moment that the last thing he was thinking about was his breathing. By the time you helped him into the passenger seat, he was gasping for air, sobbing loudly. You found his communication cards in the center console and handed them to him once he was looking at you. 

“Luke,” You said firmly, but not unkindly. “I need you to breathe. You’re making yourself more overwhelmed right now. Can you copy me?” You asked him. 

Luke slowly began to copy your breathing, which led to him visibly relaxing. Once he had caught his breath, he flipped through the cards before landing on one and showing it to you. ‘I’m overwhelmed’ it read, followed by a card that said ‘I feel sick’. 

“Oh bubba,” You cooed sadly. “Here, I have some things to help, my love.” You made sure not to make any sudden movements before passing Luke a weighted blanket from the backseat (that you kept in the car for this exact reason), his comfort stuffie, and a bottle of water. 

“Try to take small sips, sweetie. I’m going to start driving now. Tap my arm if you feel like you need to throw up, love.” You told him. 

You knew how much Luke’s overstimulation attacks wore him out, but you also knew that he would be able to rest and recharge much quicker at home than in the parking lot. Once your boyfriend nodded, you slowly started driving home, looking over at Luke every now and then. The blond was hugging his stuffed animal to his chest as he snuggled under the weighted blanket, still sniffling. 

By the time you pulled into your driveway, Luke was fast asleep in the passenger seat. You cooed softly, snapping a quick picture of him. He looked like an absolute angel with the afternoon sunshine beaming onto his mop of blond curls. You knew how much energy autistic

meltdowns took out of him, so you continued to let the car idle so he could sleep. After all, the gas in the car was replaceable. The beautiful angel you were so lucky to call your boyfriend wasn’t, so you were content to let him get his rest. In fact, it was therapeutic for you too. 

“My ray of sunshine.” You whispered softly to yourself. 

#luke hemmings #luke hemmings imagine #luke hemmings imagines #luke hemmings fanfic #luke 5sos #luke hemmings x you #luke hemmings x reader #luke hemmings x y/n #fanfic #michael clifford #5 seconds of summer #5sos fic #calum hood #5sos fanfic #5sos #ashton irwin #autism #actually autistic #neurodivergent #audhd #asd #neurodivergence #neurodiversity #5sos blurb #5sos smut #5sos x reader #5sosfam #5sos imagine #calum 5sos #5sos moodboard

[t3kandson]

Family’s at Friction

Word count; 8,977

Fandom; The Boyz

Pairing; Kim Younghoon X Reader

Character; Kim Younghoon, Ju Haknyeon, Kim Sunwoo, Son Youngjae, Lee Hyunjae, Bae Jacob, Moon Kevin, Lee Sangyeon, Lee Juyeon Choi Chanhee & Ji Changmin

Warning; Angst, Guns, Robbery, Hostage, Violence (not by any TBZ characters), Oral (receiving), body marking & Unprotected sex

Notes; Happy Birthday Younghoon

Taglist; @ilovechanhee

“My son Isn’t home often, but I need to go back home, his grandfather is getting lonely without me,” Mrs Kim smiled your way. “Well I can wait till he’s home in the evenings and then leave,” you said as her appearance got brighter. “Or I could offer you a room in the house and you could reside here,” she said as you looked to the table between you. “I have a daughter I can’t leave her behind,” you admitted expecting the job to be removed. “How old is she?” Mrs Kim asked. “She’s 8,” you said looking at her with hope for the job to remain. “Who will look after her while you’re here?” she query’s as she smiles back your way. “My mother, she collects her from school and takes her home till I arrive, sleeping over if she has to. She’s a widow so there’s no one at home to miss her,” you say as Mrs Kim nods. “Well seems a good arrangement to me,” she smiles offering you her hand. “The jobs yours,” she says as excitement fills you. “Thanks Mrs Kim,” you said smiling

The first week Mrs Kim stayed in the home. Due to her son working hard on a project that he wouldn’t be home for the week. That time had gone well, you had established a good teacher pupil relationship with Youngil. He was 12 and a very intelligent young man, thriving to learn everything that could teach him and you honestly couldn’t have asked for a better pupil. However, you felt for the poor child. His mother had left the family home, affairs by the dozen. Choosing money from the divorce over her own son. He felt abandoned by his mother but also felt unwanted by his father also. Kim Younghoon, had taken solace in his marital break up by working extra hard in his company. You couldn’t help but add your motherly touch, making sure Youngil ate well during the dinners Mrs Kim encouraged you to join before leaving. But also making sure he kept healthy with his vitamins.

The first time you met Younghoon, you instantly didn’t like him. Holding your hand for him to shake but he coldly walked past. “You can leave now,” he grumbled placing his coat to grab yours to shake your way. Each day he greeted you this way as you kept your head down.

“Don’t leave yet we need to talk,” he growled placing his coat a couple weeks later. “Follow me,” he demanded walking off into a room you had realised was his private living quarters. Following, your eyes noticed the large sways of alcohol in the glass cabinets, all prettily displayed. Walking to the desk he sat in his chair looking up to you with his usual expression of arrogance. “Can I ask you your credentials?” He asked filling his crystal glass with whisky. “Pardon?” You said looking at him with confusion. “I would like to know what credentials you have to assess if your actually qualified for my sons needs,” he said rather sharply looking up at you with annoyance. “Your mother vetted me,” you looked at him confused with his request. “She vetted you as a teacher yes, but I would like to know your credentials as a psychiatrist,” he said taking a swig of his liqueur. “I don’t have any,” you replied looking at him puzzled. “Well could you explain why you seem fit to discuss his personal life?” Younghoon said with a slight growl in his tone. “What do you mean?” You questioned feeling annoyed with his accusations. “Well I pay you to teach my son well. Instead your offering advice to his apparent woes,” Younghoon accused as your eyes widened. “Your son mentioned something that worried him. As a teacher who knows a clear mindset improves their work I listened,” you scoffed arms folded as his eyes widened to your own tone. “But you gave your own opinion to Manipulate him into emotions he doesn’t actually have,” Younghoon said raising his voice to match yours. “That’s poppycock, just because you don’t have time for your son, don’t presume he doesn’t have the emotions he clearly does. If he’s telling you then it’s to express himself,” you said as his jaw tightened. “Well he never expressed it before you was employed as his teacher,” Younghoon growled. “Maybe if you gave your son the time of day he would have expressed that,” you said slamming your hand onto the desk startling him. “I think it’s best you leave,” he said bitterly slouching into his chair. “Goodnight,” you said spinning on your heel. “For good,” he added as you spun back to face him. Walking towards him his eyes differed with fear. “Good now I can really express myself. Your son is failing because of you. Your too selfish to hide from your pain, punishing your son for something his mother did twice off. Not just for cheating but taking your money and leaving. You’ve made that boy feel unwelcome and placed him in so much pain he can’t focus. Ignore me all you like but if you don’t put his emotional needs first then you won’t have a son to brag about at your regular golfing events,” you snap watching his words get stuck in his throat. “Now if you don’t mind I have a daughter that I love dearly who needs her mothers attention,” you add spinning back around to leave him dumbfounded.

It had been a week and things had fallen apart. Your argument with Kim Younghoon had left you without your wages you had rightly earned the last month. You had already fallen behind terribly before the job let alone now. The final demand came through the door as you held it shakily. You had till this evening to At least supply one months rent or you would be evicted. Tears fell from your eyes as you fell to the floor sobbing. What was you going to tell Yoona? Where was you even going to go?

When the door opened you had expected it to be your mother and daughter. But to your horror it was Younghoon, witnessing your complete breakdown. “Y/N,” he coo’d coming to you as he sat beside you. “What’s happened?” He asks as you sobbed even louder instead of replying. His arms wrapped around you like this was a different person you had experienced before. He held you tightly as you sobbed not caring that tears was beginning to fall on his expensive Gucci jacket. “So now you’ve sobbed the entire sea are you going to tell me what’s happened to create such a dam break?” He said rubbing your shoulder. “It doesn’t matter, it’s something I need to fix somehow,” you said pushing yourself out his hold. “Can I help?” He asks as you stand to your feet watching him follow. “You’ve done enough not paying me the months work I’ve done,” you said bitterly as you wiped your eyes. “Yeah about that,” he said with guilt in his expression. “What?” You snapped making his jaw tighten. “What issues do you have? Why do you feel the need to snap,” he growls folding his arms. “What’s your credentials as a psychiatrist?” You hit back at him. Instead of a snarky come back he stifles a laugh instead. “Hitting me with my own words are we?” He said amused. “Look I think we’ve got off on the wrong foot,” he said as you deadpanned his way. “No your an ass,” you said earning a brighter smile. “Fine I’m am ass, who thanks to you was dished some food to really think about,” he said smiling more Warmer then you experienced before. “Is this an apology,” you said tilting your head his way. “Well yes it is,” he said accepting responsibility. “Can I get that in writing?” You said arms folded. He looked around the room in sight for some paper as he made his way for it. “Fine if I have to,” he said picking up the letter in his hand. “Don’t worry,” you said as you panicked realising he was holding your eviction letter. As you attempted to swipe the document, he pulled it out your reach his eyes bulging as he read it. “This is my fault,” he said sorrowfully as you snatched it out his palm. “Yes, yes it is,” you growled taking it and throwing it on the side behind you. “Right I will sort it,” he smiled as you felt his words lift your worry’s. “You need to pay them my months wage to them,” you said more calmer as he picked up the letter once more, then his phone. “Hi I’m the employee of Mrs Y/N, I was wondering if I could pay a month off her backlogged rent,” he said in a professional tone. “How much?” He gasped. “For this shitty apartment,” he growled. “Sod that,” he snapped hanging up on the phone. “What did you say that for?” You said closing your eyes briefly. “Your months wage wouldn’t even cover that,” he scoffed as you breathed in deeply. “It’s 3 million won you owe me 4,” you said annoyed. “Funny that, they’ve asked for 5 million,” he said making your eyebrows furrowed. Picking your phone up you dialled your landlord. “Hi it’s Mrs Y/N, my former employer rang moments ago to pay my one month of rent as demanded in your eviction threat,” you said pausing as the female voice hit your ears. “Ahh yes, he refused saying he wouldn’t pay 5 million won,” she said down the phone. “But my rent is 3 million,” you questioned as Younghoon expression slightly showed a smirk. “We’ve decided to up the rent so to stop the eviction it will have to be 5 million won,” she said as your hands fell to your face, tears threatening to fall once more. “It’s ok I will arrange something,” Younghoon said down the phone he snatched from your hands. “The keys will be in the door once she’s moved this evening,” he growled hanging up. “What did you do?” You cried grabbing the phone. “Your not going to save this situation Y/N, your waste your time and breath trying,” he said placing his hand over your shoulder. “But where am I going to go, me and my daughter are going to be homeless,” you whispered as he looked at you with concern. “What are you going to do Y/N? Beg with every inch of your life?” He said sarcastically. “Yes if I have to,” you whined feeling defeated.

“Well good thing I’m here,” he said smiling at you. “I’ve come to offer you your job back. Youngil’s been quite hesitant to have another teacher. He demands you, so you can have your job back. I will even give you more financial support,” he said smiling. “Good then can I have a sub to get my rent paid,” you pleaded happily accepting your job back. “Oh the increase isn’t in money it’s still 4 million,” he said with his smirk returning to your confusion. “I have two spare rooms, you could move in with your daughter,” he said as you looked at him confused. “Two bedrooms, meals included, no bills and 4 million wons a month,” he said arms folded excited for your reply. It was like your brain froze in that second unable to process what he was promising. “But what do you get extra of?” You questioned as he chuckled. “To be the Nanny when I’m late from work, and I suppose his new psychiatrist,” he teases as you roll your eyes. “However, I must add time is of the essence,” he added looking at the clock just three hours left to unpack. “Fine, thank you,” you said offering him a smile. “Good now you can save my ear from my son’s emotional blackmail,” he added dramatically. “Maybe I should make you wait,” you said playfully. “Ok then maybe I should withdraw my offer,” he teased that made your eyes widen. “No, no need,” you said holding your hand in fear watching him chuckle. Had you read him the wrong way before hand? Had work and stress altered his moods when you found him. Because the man stood in your kitchen wasn’t the same man that you met at his lavish home.

Younghoon and Youngil was waiting patiently when you & Yoona arrived. Comforting your only child you was amazed at the sudden change in Younghoon’s character. Bending down to your daughter size, he brushed Yoona’s stray hair behind her ear in a comforting way. “It’s ok they’re is nothing to be scared about here, I promise,” he said softly as her hug tightened around your waist. “This is your home now,” he said looking somewhat excited himself. “We even have a games room,” Youngil said in an effort to help comfort her. “I can show you if you want?” He asked holding out his hand. Yoona shyly looked your way as you nodded reassuringly before looking the elder boys way. Taking his hand they dash away to the house as Younghoon looked contented. “Your good with her,” you complimented as he chuckled. “You sound as if your surprised,” he said smirking. “Well if I can be honest,”, “that you can,” he cut you off. “That your acting different,” you said bracing for his reaction. “Maybe you just didn’t look properly, you heard Youngil’s complaints and made your painting. Yes I’ve made mistakes a load of them. But I love that boy with every breath,” he added smiling your way. “However, your correct i showed you a bad side of myself. I saw a young attractive girl who I feared was trying to use my son to date me,” he added as you tilted your head his way. “My wife was like that, very manipulative, she didn’t want me she wanted money and she took it to the men she cheated on me with,” he said looking pained. “Sorry to hear that,” you said as he pursed his lips. “What about Yoona’s father?” He asked as your own past burned. “He left me when I fell pregnant,” you said biting your lips as you looked to the floor. “So you never married him?” He gasped as you closed your eyes. Being an single unmarried mother brought you so much awful looks in the past. You didn’t know why you slipped this information with someone so upper class. Breathing in deep you prepared for the disgust to fall from his lips. “So you had to provide all alone by yourself?” Younghoon quizzed as you nodded. “That’s awful, but you’ve worked so hard you should be so proud,” he said holding on to your arms. “Thank you,” you said appreciating his comforting words. “What do you fancy for tea,” he said stepping into the house. “Anything, me and Yoona’s not fussed,” you said as he smiled. “Well let’s go out for a meal, it’s the first night of you both being here,” he said excitedly. “You don’t need to,” you said bashfully. “I’m your boss it’s my orders,” he said smirking your way. “Fine,” you said rolling your eyes.

The house had become very family like, you made breakfast for Youngil & Yoona while preparing Younghoon’s packed lunch every morning. Dropping the children to their school you dropped off Younghoon’s lunch before returning back to the house. Evening meals you cooked normally with both the children helping before you set some tutorial work. Meals in the evening normally spent like a family before a movie or two. To an outsider you looked like a family. Younghoon doting on Yoona just as much as his own son. Both the children was dearly sweet, Youngil acting very brother like. Some weekends the four of you would walk in the natural reserves or enjoying fishing on Younghoon’s yacht.

However, everything started to feel different not long after. You had already smiled at the very like couple act you was currently experiencing. Watching him dry up the dishes you past after washing as you both chatted about your day. While you was lost in Younghoon’s topic about work related conversation, you mind was floating about how you could imagine him as a husband. The sadness that he had possibly given her everything and still cheated. If you was married to him you would have cherished him. You chuckled to your thoughts when it had not been long ago when you despised him instead. “Your not listening to me are you?” Younghoon said breaking you from your thoughts. “Yes, yes I was,” you lied letting a slight blush creep up your face. “So the clients fathers death is amusing,” he asked smirking as your face fell in horror. “Ok sorry I got lost in thought I’m sorry, but before that I really was listening,” you said chewing on your bottom lip. “So what was you day dreaming about?” He asked drying the dish you past him. “Nothing much,” you said feeling let down by your warming face. “Was it something sexy,” he whispered in your ear making you shudder as you gasped. “No,” you shot out abruptly as he chuckled looking at the mess you was making of yourself. “I won’t tell if you don’t,” he said playfully as he nudged you. “Just was thinking that the worlds an ass to leave someone like you single,” you admitted as he looked taken back. “Think I preferred the sexy thoughts,” he said trying to brush over your words. “Would you now,” you winked his way trying to bring the awkward tension to an end. His hands reached out to the bowl you past but his fingers overlapped yours. Instead of removing them his eyes got lost. The chemistry between you zapping into the atmosphere as you watched his eyes fall to your lips. Thighs tightened as your mind imagining him pulling you to him to place them on you. Words failing you both as each second made the environment almost unbearable under both your heated glances. As he nears closer you don’t know if you think he’s about to kiss you or because you want him to. But before your body moves towards him to figure that out you hear a patter of feet enter the kitchen as you turn to face Yoona with sleepy but wet eyes on her face. “Baby,” you cry as you walk towards her. But before you can, Younghoon scoops her up into his arms. “Did you have a nightmare?” He questions as he wipes her escaping tear as she nods. “Oh hunnie let mummy,”, “shall we get some cookies and milk to help your tears,” Younghoon cuts you off as she nodded. “Sorry I should ask your,” , “no your good,” you replied, now your turn to cut him off. You watched with a warming feeling in your body as he saw to your daughter. It looked like you wasn’t the only one getting attached to the wealthy business owner.

Excitement was buzzing through you as security approved you inside Younghoon’s building. You had been invited to have lunch with Younghoon that day. He had jokingly said the previous week of a promise of a lunch date and though you wasn’t intending it to be reality. His text this morning brought a sense of excitement to fill you. You knew the blurred line of his Son’s live in Nanny was getting complicated. But while everything was innocent you didn’t want to think of that. Upon entering his office you was surprised to find it was filled with some others. Instead of suits they looked relaxed and casual and told you they was his friends. Younghoon’s confused face turned to horror and he leapt up towards you. “Mrs Y/N,” he said looking shady which had your head tilt as you felt the eyes on you. He placed his hand around you taking you to the side of the room. “Oh I’m really sorry I forgot to message you. My friends are in town and sprung this visit,” he said looking anxious for your reply. “It’s ok really,” you smiled to reassure him as your eyes took to his friends beady one’s. “I’ll make it up to you I promise,” he said letting his eyes twinkle in your view as you smile smitten his way. “You guys might as well share this,” you said handing him the picnic bag of items you made for your lunch. “Thanks I appreciate it,” he said stiffening when he heard the mocking of his friends. “Well I’ll leave you to it,” you said bowing before leaving. You barely got to the lift when you remember your car keys was in the basket. Dashing back you heard their chatter within the hallway from the slightly ajar door. “Live in nanny or paid girlfriend,” you heard a voice jibe that made you realise you was the subject. “It’s not like that,” you heard Younghoon scoff as your stomach started to fall. “Those lover eyes you both looked with tells me otherwise,” another one chuckled. “Get off, she’s paid to look after the family that’s all,” Younghoon said as you felt that you was seeing the wrong signs clearly. “So you don’t like her then? Maybe you need to send her the memo,” hit the air as the rest of them laughed with him. “No I don’t like her, I appreciate her,” Younghoon said as you felt your eyes begin to water. Not caring for the keys you turned to dash away. However, you bumped into a solid form before falling to the floor with a yelp. “Sorry I didn’t mean to scare you, are you ok?” A worried face came into your view before he squatted to hold your arms. “Yes sorry I’m,”, “Y/N what happened?” You heard from the door cut you off. Younghoon’s eyes was fall of concern till they fell on the gentleman by your side, especially his hands gently on your arm. “She fell,” he said to Younghoon as his eyes fell back to concern to find your other arm. “Let me help you up,” he said softly with the other guy helping you to your feet. Brushing the gentleman hand off your arm to make sure you was steady before he left yours, his looked slightly annoyed. “Thanks Haknyeon, the guys are in there,” he said without his eyes on someone who clearly was also a friend. “Thanks,” you said grateful for his assistance when he could have laughed at you, like those in the very room he was entering. Haknyeon looked at you softly smiling before he felt Younghoon’s glare and entered his office. “Was you eaves dropping?” He scolded you into the hallway which was silent. “No I was coming for my keys, there in the basket,” you said feeling yourself annoyed with his accusation. He looked at you with his remaining annoyance on his expression as he left to the room. You stood there in silence feeling your heart beat heavy listening to the jibes about your incident. Younghoon emerged minutes later with your keys as he walked you silently away from the room towards the lift. It made you feel unwanted and question everything that you had believe was between you both. Maybe you needed to unblur the lines between you.

It had become clear that he felt he needed space as you received a message stating that he was going away for a couple of days with the guys. The house was quiet without Younghoon and you couldn’t help but miss his company. Youngil and Yoona clearly felt the change in your emotions. Both them being attentive with you and helping you with chores. Which made it a little painful watching the bond that they both had established. Youngil had become Yoona’s defender and very like a big brother. Even getting up to make breakfast to let you have a lay in to help you out. As much as you needed to find away to unattach yourself and Yoona from the family settings here, you just couldn’t bring yourself to, where Youngil was concerned.

You was woken with loud clatter downstairs one evening. Dashing downstairs in your silk gown over your Pyjama dress, you found Younghoon and his friends piling the house. “Oh look it’s the paid wife,” his friend with the most beautiful sun kissed skin mocked. “Sunwoo cut that shit out,” Younghoon growled slightly slurring his words. “Sorry I thought it was intruders,” you said chewing your bottom lip. Younghoon eyes looked lost in lust as he watched you bite your lip away. “Don’t do that you won’t have any skin left,” he snapped making you jump. “Sorry,” you replied as you went to return to your room. But before you could you felt a hand take your wrist to face them. Younghoon looked lost in your eyes not caring that he was showing the passion in them. But despite his deceiving eyes you knew he felt nothing for you. “Can you get us some drinks,” he finally spilled when your eyes took to his friends all amused. Nodding silently you made your way to his office to collect several liqueurs bringing them to the feisty loud living room. Haknyeon’s eyes take yours as you smile his way. Returning to the kitchen you find yourself startled when you turn to face Haknyeon stood there. Stood against the kitchen island his eyes are intently watching you. “Are you really just the live in nanny?” He questions tilting his head. “I’m only intrigued I’m not here to judge,” he said showing his beautiful smile your way. “I’m just his live in Nanny that’s all,” you said as he hummed to himself and came round to your side. Leaning into the Cupboard to reach for some more glasses he looked at you confused. “You don’t get paid to do that so let me help,” he said placing the glasses on to the tray. Younghoon’s eyes widened watching you following empty handed behind Haknyeon. “Didn’t I ask you to do that?” He snapped your way. Instead of taking it your annoyance kicked in as your jaw tightened. “I thought she’s just a live in Nanny not your maid?” Haknyeon said before you could open your mouth. “Who asked you?” Younghoon growled as you saw Haknyeon’s jaw tense. “Maybe if you learnt how to treat women with respect then your wife wouldn’t have cheated on you,” he said squaring up to his friend. Younghoon laughed in a mocking Way before attempting to swing towards his younger. His friends getting around him to pull him away. “You never could handle your drink,” Haknyeon tutted. “I’m not the one hitting their friend you can remove your hand Hyunjae,” Haknyeon said snapping at his friend who stepped back with his hands up. “Sunwoo, Youngjae let him be, let him take a swipe at me,” he snapped at the two holding Younghoon back. “If they let me go I’m going to beat you,” Younghoon growls. “Woah, woah come on guys,” another friend said standing between them all. “You shouldn’t have brought up Jiyeon,” he said at Haknyeon before turning to face Younghoon. “And you shouldn’t be treating your Nanny as a maid, let alone being rude,” he said to Younghoon, who’s eyes fell to you with a little bit of shame in them. “Unless there’s something your holding back from us,” he said looking between you both. “Shut up Chanhee,” Younghoon grumbles as you feel tears ready to spill. “Hyunjae can you take Haknyeon home please,” Chanhee says to his elder who nods. Haknyeon looks at you with concern as you nod to reassure him before they silently leave. Not before the iciness in Younghoon eyes take his, Sunwoo and Youngjae struggling to hold him back. Once the door shuts behind him and the car drives away the younger two release there hands. Chanhee turns to you smiling warmly. “Y/N maybe this is something that you don’t have to be around for. Why don’t you get some sleep,” Chanhee says as you feel your tears escape. Nodding you take yourself silently to your room as you hear Chanhee continue to scold his elder.

You woke early the rest of the week making Younghoon and the children their breakfast. But returned to your room so that you didn’t have to sit in the same room then him. You couldn’t afford to have the angry words you wanted to spill when your daughter and you could face homelessness. You still made his lunch dropping it at the front desk on the way home from the school run. The children was fed before you tutored them. Younghoon’s dinner placed ready to be heated by himself once home. There was occasions when Younghoon would attempt to communicate with you once he got back. Finding you in either in Youngil’s room or Yoona’s, but you kept him at arms length.

Mr Kim @10.55am; Thank you for my lunch it looks very yummy. Can’t wait for lunch time.

Can I be cheeky and ask that you can purchase some snacks. I’m hoping to host a party this evening. I have some apologising to be making to Haknyeon.

You @11;32pm Send me what you require and I will collect.

Throwing the items into the trolley you made your way to the counter. However, three guys in a balaclava storm the shop. One points their gun at the shop keeper making demands. The other aiming his gun in your direction as the last one bordered the door, aiming his at anyone who attempted to enter the shop. “Stand over there,” the one watching over you snapped as you tilted your head unafraid. “Don’t think I won’t shoot you,” he growled as you felt anger tense through you. He could sense your defiance as his gun aimed for the shopping in your trolley. Shooting the bottle of whisky you was ordered to buy for Younghoon to apologise to Haknyeon. The glass exploded, shards going everywhere. One scratching your arms, thankfully just a skin wound, but the blood attempt to drip down your arms. “Next shot will be you,” he threatened aiming the gun too closely. Biting your lip to ground yourself you obeyed moving to the area he pointed to. As you walked you felt your phone vibrate. “What do you hope to achieve?” You said loudly on the hope he wouldn’t hear the phone buzzing in your back pocket. You was grateful for your dark thick clothing that meant he wouldn’t see it flash from behind you. His silence continued as you continue to talk above the vibration. Walking you to the side of the building he turned his gun on anyone who he found. Your group becoming six of you by the time you reached the small staff room. He walked around the room picking the shop phone and smashing it to the floor. His heavy boots slamming down to completely destroy it. Your heart was beating heavy, the first time feeling fear. Storming out he locked the door as you looked to your five companions all of you written with fear on your face.

Slouching down you felt your phone vibrate as you dashed to the call. Mr Kim written all over the screen. “Finally you picked up,” he moaned down the phone. “I don’t need the shopping in the end, they’ve cancelled,” he breathed down the phone heavily. You heard noise from outside the door so you didn’t want to risk answering. The woman beside you her eyes beaded in fear. “Y/N, please answer, tell me you heard that,” he grumbled down the phone. “Or have you brought it already?” He questioned. Suddenly the door sounded as if it was being unlocked so you threw the phone behind you. Closing your eyes when you realised you forgot to hang up. “Get fucking in there,” the man growled tossing a battered and bruised gentleman who looked like he attempted to fight back. His eyes roamed the room as you could hear Younghoon calling in the distance. Fear setting in that he would be heard, you decided to speak once more. “Surely theirs a better way then this?” You said shakily. “What have I said,” he growls aiming his gun back in your direction. “I really will shoot you next time,” he hisses before he storms out the room locking it. As the others dash to the newest member in the room you dash to your phone. “Younghoon,” you whimper. “What’s going on?” He says sounding panicked. “The shop, three gunman,” you throw out choking in fear, not knowing how long you could keep the line of communication open. “Are you hurt?” He says fearfully. “No but one of us is,” you whimper. “I’ll get help, hold tight, keep that mouth under control please I beg you,” he pleads down the phone as a tear escapes. Before you can respond the door is opened once more, the phone placed behind you once again. This time on purpose so he can hear everything. Another two members of staff are thrown in looking in a traumatised expression. The mans eyes take you with anger once more as if he’s expecting you to speak, but you remain tight lipped. “Good you lost your mouth,” he smirks before walking out and locking the door once more. “Be careful,” the man next to you said as you nod before grabbing the phone back. “How many are they of you?” He questions when your heavy breathing hits the phone. “9 one badly injured,” you said as you can hear him passing the information to someone. “I’m on my way, the police have been notified, keep your self quiet and we’re get you out as soon as we can,” he says in an attempt to calm you. “If I don’t,” , “don’t you dare say that we’re not even talking like that,” Younghoon cuts you off. The door opens quick as a flash taking you unguarded. You know his eyes saw you throw your phone behind you. “I knew you was up to no good,” he growled storming his way your direction. Tossing you aside he picked the phone up pressing it to his ear. “Y/N, what’s happening,” you hear even from where you landed. “She’s not available at the moment, maybe check in with the local mortuary,” he chuckles hanging up the phone. He looks at your locked screen which was a photo of Yoona. “Is this your girl?,” he asks as you can’t find the words to respond even if you wanted to. “Well looks like her mummy wants to play at being our main hostage,” he grins throwing the phone to the floor. His feet stamping on it making it crunch under his shoes. Grabbing you by the collar he drags you up, your body not relenting as it tightens around your throat. Dragging you he takes you outside throwing you into the shelf. You whimper as the impact crushes against your chest. “What’s up you lost your bravado mentality,” he mocks after locking the room.

Your eyes find the other two, bags of money, alcohol and fags in sight. “As this one’s called the cops she’s gladly offered to be today’s hostage,” he snarls throwing you into the other masked man. “How long did you call them?” He said rather calmly as his hands brushed down your jawline. “I was on the phone to my boyfriend not the police,” you said scared to mention your boss was the very Ceo of Bbang express. “But he was talking to the police?” He asked tilting his head. “I believe so,” you said honestly as he brushed your hair out your face. “How long ago?” He asked softly your way. “Just before he walked in,” you said as tears pricked your eyes. “It’s ok princess, you do as your told and we’re get you home to lover boy,” he said as you could see the flashing lights outside the building. “Now If you spoke to her nicely you might have prevented this,” he grumbled at the guy who had attacked you. “Right all you need to do is do as I tell you and keep your mouth shut,” he said pressing the gun to your temple as his arm swarm around your chest. “It’s ok princess I won’t use this, unless you give me good reason to,” he coo’d in your ear. Walking to the fresh air which felt refreshing, but the sight not so much. Armed police with their guns pressed in your direction. In the distance though your eyes found Younghoon. He looked in a way you never experienced, his face full of concern and worry. “Let the hostage go,” you heard echo around you. “I will once we’ve escaped,” he smirks walking towards the car that was still parked. The other two jumped in the vehicle with their haul, he stepped backwards with you into the car. Your eyes taking Younghoon before the man pulled you in. Throwing himself to the floor the gun was pressed into your back. “Drive,” he grumbled as the car began to show life. “Don’t you dare move, not yet?” He said with a slight harshness. Tears flowing down your eyes, you watched Younghoon fade in to the distance looking distressed as he got into his own car. As you sped away, you watched as the police followed the chase. “How many,” he snapped pressing the gun into your back. “Too many to count,” you whispered. “Fuck sake put your foot down,” he snapped. You watched slowly as the cars chasing dwindled down. The clever manoeuvres and the sun being chased down, too you soon found secluded empty roads ahead and nothing following. The gun was removed from your back as your eyes looked to your captor sitting up. “Drive over,” he snapped, as his hands cupped your face. “I promised you you would be safe if you helped,” he whispered. “Your letting me go?” You questioned as he chuckled. “Why do you fancy joining me,” he sniggered as you screwed your face his way. “My life’s not one for you,” he said as he leaned over opening the door for you to escape. “Go live for you and your daughter,” he said beneath the mask. Climbing out the car your eyes took the bigger man who hurt you. He grumbled something you couldn’t hear and before you knew it the car drove off, leaving you in the pitch dark not knowing where you was.

For the first time in ages you felt vulnerable, alone and cold. Your feet stumbled as the tears fell as you made your way to find any sign of life. Your ribs hurting like hell with each step. You had walked at least a couple of miles, before a car came your way. You waved wincing almost immediately from the sharp pain, sighing in relief when the car pulled up. However, you felt even more at peace when it was Younghoon’s face that took yours. “Y/N,” he choked as he took you into his arms. “You found me,” you whimpered as the tears flooded. “I told you I wouldn’t let you out my sight,” he said patting your hair as he kissed your Crown. “Are you hurt,” he said examining you but he struggled in the dark. He grabbed his torch light on his phone checking you out, his face looking in fear at the glass cut skin in your arms. “We need to get you checked out,” he said as you didn’t stop crying to respond. Placing his jacket over you he brings you to the car holding you tightly as it takes you to the hospital.

Thankfully nothing was broken just sore muscle damage. Your flesh wound didn’t even need stitches. However, Younghoon demanded you was house bound for almost a month. He took time off work to become the home maker himself. When you was fed up being cooped up you pleaded to be left to your own devices. However, Younghoon didn’t want to pull any more chances. From now on you was all to have bodyguards. You already knew Juyeon, his own security and driver. But you soon met Jacob who was entrusted with Yoona’s care. Kevin with Youngil as well as your own Sangyeon. Younghoon ordered that no one was allowed to leave without their security. You was told not to do the school runs letting Jacob and Kevin deal with them. You had even moaned what was the point in your own security if you wasn’t allowed to leave the house. Especially as he made demands for no shopping trips or lunch time delivery’s. It was like the incident made the house go in some sort of high protection. You had to laugh that you had survived the last month since the incident why the sudden need now. But then you knew the Robbers still hadn’t been caught. You knew enough from eavesdropping that Younghoon had employed a team to investigate themselves. Ji Changmin had questioned you just as much as the police had, if not more. Changmin wanted to know every aspect of your life. Which infuriated you as how was your past life relevant to an incident where you was simply just at the wrong place at the wrong time. You appreciated Younghoon’s concerns, it felt good to know he cared enough about your safety. He had cared for you so intently while you recovered, that those butterfly feelings returned, even more so then normal. The way his eyes looked at you from the other side of the room. His friends even visiting to check up on you, he stop denying you was more then just a live in nanny. They had sniggered even more worse but after a while they became supportive. Haknyeon blamed himself. If it wasn’t for the argument he felt that you wouldn’t have been there getting his make up spread. But you told him you knew Younghoon well enough that he enjoyed his boys moments and he would have found another excuse.

Though you felt as if you and Younghoon was nearing breaking the line between you both. He reminded you as always that it was just your own Delulu mind. You watched as he left for the glamorous event at a local charity ball. He had looked dashing before you left and your thighs instantly tightened, leaving you wanting to be by his side. Your heart fell when you watched on social media him walk in with a girl on his arms. Talks of his secret relationship hit everywhere on the feeds that you couldn’t help but let the tears fall. You had obviously taken his caring nature for something else. Yet he always made it obvious that you wasn’t someone he was into. Instead he had been hiding a relationship. Beneath the jealous sizzling in you, you felt angered slightly that you was no doubt At least friends and he kept that from you. You didn’t wait up for him as planned, instead taking yourself to bed to sob yourself to sleep.

Realising that you had to create some form of distance between you, you started that following morning. Using the breakfast table to test Youngil and Yoona for their upcoming exams. It was to remember you wasn’t a paid substitute partner but Youngil’s tutor. Instead of his lunch being hand made you ordered it in for him. When Younghoon wanted to take you out for a meal you arranged for Kevin to take Youngil. While you and Yoona stayed home in your room ordering take out as you watched a movie.

“What’s going on?” Younghoon quizzed grabbing your wrist the second the children was taken to school that morning. You hadn’t realised Younghoon was yet to leave for work. “I’m waving the children off,” you smiled as you went to walk off before his hands grabbed your wrist. “Why didn’t you and Yoona come yesterday?” He quizzed looking hurt. “I’m use to your paddy’s but that really hurt you not letting Yoona come,” he said looking pained. “Because I’m just your live in nanny and Yoona is just the Nanny’s daughter. We’re all forgetting our roles here, this isn’t mine and Yoona’s home, it’s our work related residency,” you said as his eyes blinked in shock. “I’m confused,” he said as you smiled at him. “Younghoon we’re temporary, one day Youngil won’t need a tutor or to be minded. He’s 12, He doesn’t really need minding now that’s what Kevins for. When that day comes it will be painful for Yoona, she needs to be reminded we’re not a family,” you explained as you brushed his hand off your wrist to walk to the stairs to your room. “Wait Y/N,” He called behind you as you turned to face him half way on the stairs. “Why do you suddenly think this is temporary? do you think little of me that when Youngil don’t need you, that I will just brush you aside? Are you that blind to not even realise I care for Yoona myself?” He says looking pained. “So what your going to keep her here till she’s old enough to leave?” You mock rolling your eyes. “Why not?” He scoffs looking serious. “Because your not her dad Younghoon, we already confuse those kids as it is,” you spluttered as he furrowed his eyes your way. “Ok I do, I confuse them because I keep confusing your friendship with something else,” you let slip as his face relaxed almost amused. “You have feelings?” He teased as you grumbled continuing to walk up the stairs to run to hide in your room from revealing further more. “Y/N stop walking away,” he groaned following. “Why so you can continue mocking me,” you said as you go to open your bedroom door, before Younghoon’s hand press to avoid that. “I’m not mocking you I’m sorry,” he said throwing his head into your view against the door. His bottom lip playfully pouting as he try’s to make you smile. “See I’m just trying to make you laugh that’s all.” He said sweetly. “But seriously do you really like me?” He asked holding your waist just a breath away. “Please,” you said trying to brush him aside to no avail. “Can we not talk about this it’s embarrassing as it is,” you said looking up at him with pleading eyes. “If it makes you feel better i like you too,” he said his hands tightening around your waist.

You went into shock as your mind attempted to take his words. “What,” you stuttered as he laughed spinning you so you was against your own bedroom door. His hands placed either side of you, his face brought closer. “I like you Y/N,” he said whispering into your ear. “That girl from the ball,” you whispered yourself, closing your eyes as you struggled under him. “Is that what this weeks been about, her?” he chuckles. “She’s nothing special, I can promise you, it’s not like I could have taken you even though I wanted to,” he said watching you as you felt irritation attack. “Why because your ashamed of me?” you gasped as he shook his head. “Because you don’t like the spotlight, your not ready for the publicity of being with someone like me. Having to deal with the likes of my mother, Youngil’s mum,” he added as you calmed. “When I finally get you to accept a relationship with me I want to be greedy, I want you to myself, all mine,” he smirks devilishly.

Before you can speak another word his lips fall to yours. It’s like he’s held back for so long as the kisses are deep and frenzied. His teeth occasionally nipping at your lips when they don’t keep up with his desperate needy flow. His hands you can hear are fighting the handle of your door and you know he’s about to devour you. You can feel your thighs dampen in excitement. As he opens the door he winks at you having let you come up for air. Pulling you into your room he drags you to the bed. Dropping to the floor he removes your lower clothing, humming at the view of your glistering pussy on show. Pulling you to sit on the bed he hears his phone ring in his back pocket. He doesn’t even look at the device turning it off without his eyes leaving yours. Lips falling to your heat he lets his tongue swipe up and down your folds. Swirling the tip around your nub he enjoys listening to you moan into the air. It’s like it encourages him more as his tongue finds its way to slide against your velvety walls. Bringing your pelvis towards his tongue fucking you, become a messy feast for the both of you. While you feel like your slowly unwinding to your upcoming explosion. You know that your juices are flowing down his chin as he enjoys his meal. Thighs trembling you feel almost ready to jump off your high with him but he stops earning a grumble from your lips. “Don’t be so greedy my baby,” he teases wiping your juices from his chin. “I want you to be greedy with me at the same time,” he says standing to remove his clothes. Seeing him standing there naked almost knocks you into a different world. One where your mind is no longly functioning. From his chuckle your sure your dribbling in his view. Hovering over you his fingers attack your t-shirt till they remove your bra. His lips impatiently suckling over your nipple. It’s like the taste of your skin is his favourite as he enjoys licking, sucking along both your breasts. Your sure that he’s no doubt marked you as he struggles under his pleasure. Lips soon start to chase to your neck. This time there’s no mistake his suckling on purpose as he marks your skin. “Mine,” he whispers into your ear as your hand finds to his waist. Lining himself at your entrance he slowly presses into your core. His eyes not leaving you as he watches you fall apart underneath. Stilling as he bottoms out in you, your walls respond tightening around him. “Oh baby that feels so good,” he whispers with shakily breath. Lips crashing with yours, his needy inpatient kisses return, this time with a rhythm of his cock deep in you at the same time. Nails raking along his back encourages him to speed his pace as your moans are more whimpers and cry’s. Lifting your legs over his shoulder to reach a more deeper position the coil beneath you begin To evolve once more. Your own pelvis attempting to move against his own, but his hand weighs you down further restricting you. You suckled down his chuckles mixed with his own moans. Hands cupping your face gently doesn’t match the speed and harshness of his shaft hitting you so perfectly, your thighs shake as your orgasm nears. His lips leave yours as his own tethers, your name spills like a mantra. The words hitting the air is enough to send you crazy as you fall off your own. Your wall crushing around his cock that his grunts become deeper as he fills you with ropey cum. He continues as he slowly thrusts his last couple of movements against you.

Lips returning to yours he lets your legs drop. His kisses much more romantic as his hands brush down your face. “Are you really mine?” you ask between his kisses that makes him stop to look at you. “Do I really look like a man who spins words just to get them in to bed?” He questions as you smile shaking your head. “Y/N I meant what I said. Your mine, I just want to keep it private before the world, my world scares you away,” he said looking at you seriously. “I once thought i had lost you and I’m never going back there,” he said brushing his hands along your breasts watching them harden. “That wasn’t because I was connected to you,” you said trying to comfort him. “Maybe then yes, but anyone connected to me because my money, my status they could be hurt,” he said biting his lip. “I won’t ever risk losing you. It’s why I paid for that girl to be my plus one, the eyes are on her while I enjoy my time with you,” he said pressing kisses to your breasts that had your nipples erect. “You paid for a girlfriend?” you scoffed as he chuckled. “No I paid an actress to act like she was my date, so I could keep my new family safe,” he said looking at you totally in love. “New family?” You question as he smiles. “Yes you, Youngil and Yoona, my family,” he said as his lips fell to yours.

Getting lost in your moment you didn’t register the raised voices coming up the stairs. But the way Younghoon’s lips was engaged with yours he didn’t neither. Not till the door blasted open.

At the bottom of your bed was a woman looking at you both furious. Her eyes meeting Younghoon’s, guilt written all over them. “What the hell,” you hit out pulling the bed sheets to cover you. “What the hell? Is that all you can say when your in bed with my husband,” she screams angrily in to the room. Behind her seconds later walks in Youngil, his face in horror at finding you in bed with his father.

In that second you wanted the floor to eat you whole.

To be continued ……

Masterlist

#kpop smut #kpopidol #fiction #the boyz smut #kim younghoon smut #ji changmin #moon kevin #kim younghoon #choi chanhee #lee hyunjae #lee sangyeon #ju haknyeon #Kim Sunwoo #son Youngjae #jacob bae

[lawliet-ryuzaki-ryuga]

Could i get hc's of L with a bipolar s/o?

Oh for sure you can!!! This is so interesting because lol I’m studying to be a psychologist so anything mental health related it up my ally! I’m going to be going based on what I’ve heard clients shared when I was shadowing a psychiatrist.

on THAT NOTE! if anyone you or anyone that you know who might be struggling with BP always reach our for some help! You’re not alone! I’m always here also! just shoot me a message on here If you ever need to talk! Maybe one day when i get my license i can better help all of you! Free session on Tumblr just give me 3 more years! But till then I’ll try to hear you out and give the best advice that I can if you need it!

1-800-950-NAMI (6264) or [email protected] if you have any questions about bipolar disorder or finding support and resources.

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lol how I imagine L just sitting by your bed, watching you. 

-Let’s be honest, L although he analyzes everything and every word, he’s also very oblivious to what’s he’s looking at or dealing with.

-With how heightened your emotions are it might be overwhelming internally for L to be honest. He Will probably try to ignore it.. He hasn’t been exposed to heightened emotions besides the emotions he feels which is mostly suppressed.

- Gives you side stares while tilting his head, waiting for you to say something. 

- That being said if your emotions of excitement/happiness are heightened he wouldn’t match it back much. But if you’re feeling down, he’ll eventually snap out of his “ ignoring phase” and do his best to find a way to ease you into comfort.

- “Uh are you alright Y/N? Do you think if I ask Watari to bring you sweets you’ll feel better?”

“ I don’t know L.”

“ I’ll ask him to bring in sweets and if you change your mind it will be there.”

“ Okay..”

* proceeds asking Watari to bring other sweets that you like until you finally pick something up.” 

- Will have cameras set up everywhere to keep an eye on you.

-if you have a history of self-harm, he will baby proof everything! To make sure you’re always okay.

- Might even go to the extent of having Watari helping you shave as he watches you because let’s be honest he has never shaved. 

-Poor boy knows all about every disorder in the books, but doesn’t know how to act.

“ Y/N i I think you’re having an episode, you were happy yesterday, and now you’re not up for anything.. should i call your doctor?”

“ L no I’m fine.”

“ But-”

“ L that’s not what bipolar is, manifestations last for days to months.”

“ oh”

-He doesn’t take care of himself but he’ll be sure your meds are taken on time.

“ Watari did she take her meds on time?

“ yes L”

“ Both Haldol and Vraylar”

“ Yes”

“ okay” * turns to his monitor and goes over footage to make sure you took the meds.*

-if at any point you’re having a manic episode L has a whole plan. You have a healthcare provider on call at all times, a room for yourself, have anything and everything he’s come to learn that you like, he will bring.

-Will walk to your room and sits down while you lay in bed if you’re going through a depressive episode, and just look at you. He knows you enjoy  his company but you also enjoy the silence. 

- “You look nice today”

“ well I don’t feel great, I don’t want to go out.”

“ It will do you Good Y/N.”

“ L stop it, i don’t want to go, I don’t want to go out.”

“ If you get to force me to go out sometimes, then i have the right to take you out.”

“ L it’s not the same, I physically and mentally can’t right now.”

“ I know Y/N/N but just a 5 minute walk to get you some sunlight.”

“ Can we get some Dirty boba while we walk?”

“ Of course, you deserve it.”

- When walking around, if ay any point you just want to go back and stay in your bed. L will turn both of you back to HQ. Will get you blankets to have in the office just so you can be around people and stay in current time and reality.

-L would have over a billion tabs open on his computer as he looks up every type of recent research available so he has a better understanding of the statistics. 

#L #L Lawliet #lawliet #lawlight #death note Lawliet #Ryuzaki Lawliet #ryuzaki #ryuzaki death note #death note ryuzaki #ryuzaki x reader #Death Note #deathnote #L death note #l x reader #l x y/n #lawliet x reader #lawliet x you #deathnote x reader #death note x y/n #death note x reader #death note x you