Dean, Castiel, Mary, John, Latika, Carlos and Ada are trying to escape a horde of Akrida in order to get back to their universe. John is taking the reins of Carlos' van, despite the reluctance of his friends. They are being pursued by the Akrida queen Joan Hopkins.
Joan: Poor, poor hunters. You never should have messed with God's plan....now you deal with me.
-Later in the car-
Castiel, in passenger seat: Dean! Signal the others and tell them to meet us at the rendezvous with the impala - back to our time. Let's move it!
Latika, hanging out the window: YEAAH! Finally we’re out this hell ho- OWW! (Gets hit by a road sign then realises they were being followed) Huh?
Joan: Voila! A jerk at Twelve O'Clock.
Latika: Errr....guys we've got a tail.
Carlos, excited: PAPARAZZI!!!
Dean: Pedal to the metal John! (John rams against the pedal)
Carlos, opens the back door to show off: Don’t take any photos please. (Crouches) Hi! Here I aaaam! Don’t take (Gets shot by a stinging poison) Any photooos. (Falls asleep)
Ada, shutting the doors: NO MORE PICTURES!!!
Castiel: How long til the rendezvous point?
Mary: 2 mins, 55 seconds sir!
Castiel: Man your battle stations!
John jumps away from the wheel as Mary leaves a brick on the pedal to keep things steady.
Dean: SON OF A BITCH!! Nobody's at the wheel! GET BACK HERE!! THERE'S NO DRIVER
John: WE'RE GONNA DIE!!!
Ada: Well, don't just sit there fancy pants, take the wheel!
Dean: Are you kidding, I don't drive. I'm dead remember?
Castiel, pushing him: Move over, Miss Daisy!
Dean: What are you doing, angels can't drive! Only humans and hunters can drive.
Castiel, pressing things: What do all these buttons do? (Starts playing “Any Way You Want It” by Journey)
Castiel takes control of the wheel and suddenly begins to perform side tricks and flips with the van, leaving destruction in their path.
John: Nice one angel!
The streets crumble around them as it doesn't phase Joan and her acolytes. She accelerates forward.
Ada: OH NO! CRAZY WOMAN INCOMING!
John: Mary will slow em' down!
Mary presses a button on the van as a sewage of holy water is released. Joan avoids it briskly.
John: She's good! Mary Intel?
Mary: John, we have a serious problem! Joan Hopkins, former hunter and queen of the Akridas! Near enough horrible record!
Meanwhile Castiel is crashing into everything and driving at the wrong side of the road.
Dean: You're going the wrong way Cas!
Castiel: Just call me Mario Andretti!
Dean: No you're Suckio Andretti!
Castiel: Quit backseat driving!
Dean: I'm passenger seat driving and I want the wheel! Gimme the wheel!
Castiel: It’s not a wheel, she's mine! (Dean attempts to take it by force.) Enough. It's too late for you to drive!
Dean: Fine but don’t look at me! (Cas looks at Dean) Don’t look at me when we argue! Look at the road!
Joan eventually catches up to them and appears by the window.
Castiel, to Dean: Be cool. Be cool.
Dean puts off the music as Castiel addresses Joan.
Castiel: (to Joan) Hello officer? Is there a problem?
Dean: Err....Hi...
Joan responds by hissing at them, eyes a hellish red. Her sudden attack is interrupted by a speeding vehicle. She jumps onto the roof with immense skill.
Everyone: AHHH!
Ada: We need more power! Time to fire up the spell!
Latika: That's dark magic!
Ada, correcting her: It’s just magic.
John: She's on the roof!
Mary: But Ada, your magic is weak! You know it yourself. You don't have enough to take care of Joan even if you wanted to.
Ada: Okay (begins to perform a spell.)
Ada whispers a quick incantation under her breath as the Akrida are ensnared in plants. Joan is entangled in vines and dragged away from the van.
Dean: Okay Cas, we lost her maybe you can lose down!
Castiel: I can't, there's no brakes.
John: No brakes!
Mary: (shrugs)
John, sarcastically: Well way to commit soldier!
The van is sent hurtling over a cliffside, a dead end as they are teetering slowly off the edge.
Everyone: 😳
Dean: LET'S GET OUTTA HERE!!!!
John, pushing everyone out of the van: GOGOGOGOGOGO!!!!!
Carlos, who was still asleep in the van: Heh, where is everybody going? (Notices he's falling) AH AHHHH!!!
The van falls off the edge. Everyone is left distraught as it seems that Carlos is dead.
Suddenly, the impala comes out of a portal, driven by Bobby and Jack as Carlos is on its roof, holding on for dear life.
Carlos, being rescued by the impala: I'm flying! I am the first flying hunter!
Everyone cheers at the sight of the impala as they all celebrate the fact they're going back to their universes. But their celebration is short lived as the sound of a roaring motorcycle could be heard from behind them. They turn to see that Joan is back as she speeds towards the cliffside. Everyone watches her in horror as she comes closer. She performs multiple wheelies, approaching the impala at a dangerous speed.
Bobby opens the doors to the impala.
Bobby: Guys, get in the car!
Bobby: Jack, deploy the salt gun!
Jack: Okay! (Hanging out of the door as he fires salt at a rapid pace. Joan finesses past all of them.)
Dean: Hunters in the backseat! (Pushes John, Mary and Carlos inside.)
Everyone rushes into the impala before Joan can make her pursuit. They are running out of weapons to fight back.
Jack: (running out of salt) We don't have enough salt!
Dean: Latika get in here! (He grabs her hand)
Latika: We're free (Gets pulled out of the impala by the neck.) ACK! WHY ME?!
Castiel: Bobby! Get those gears turning! (Bobby does so)
The impala begins to drive as they are carried off the cliffside and launched into the open country road.
Castiel: Don't stop, keep driving!
Mary: Excuse me! Latika's in danger!
Dean pushes himself out of the car window as he tries to pull Latika over to them in hopes of getting Joan to let go. Her strength is unnatural as she smashes her fists through the impala windows, getting glass everywhere. Joan maintains her grip onto the car like a insect hunting for its prey. She is doing this all while strangling a defenseless Latika.
Latika, choking: ARE YOU SERIOUS!
Carlos: Jeez. This lady's really starting to freak me out...Save her Ada! (Ada performs a spell as she uses pollen to temporarily blind Joan)
Dean: Hold this! (Passes Latika's foot to Jack, then makes his way out to save her)
Castiel: Dean! Be careful! She's crazy!
Dean: You think Cas!
Dean climbs out towards the trapped Latika as he extracts something out of her bag. Dean holds tight onto the window frame.
Latika: ....What are you doing?
Dean: I'm gonna give this bitch the karma she deserves. (Uses Latika's silver knife and stabs Joan in the chest as she lets go of Latika's neck and falls to the road.)
Latika: THANK GOD!!
Joan, in pain: I'll find you hunters! Don't think I won't.
Everyone sighs in relief. Dean pulls Latika back into the impala as Mary hugs her tight. Bobby is driving as he is panting for breath like a mad man.
Bobby: Why do you idjit hunters always get yourselves into trouble, huh?
Castiel: All we did was steal a van.
Dean: Well, we can't help it when the fate of the world is on our hands! I'm married to an angel now, remember!
There is a long silence. This is a big confession to share with the class.
Everyone, realising immediately: YOU ARE!!?
THE END
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