#might bit wonky due to mobile

[my-biggest-disaster]

Sustenance Car

Side things that didn’t make it into Food Preference. Random bits that I wrote and finally feel comfortable sharing that didn’t fit well on main fic.

Each one will have an overall mood with it and the reason I cut it.

Ao3 link here soon

1/?

Sharp and Spice (Melancholy)

Reason: couldn’t think of a little Emmet thing to pair with it. It was going to be with a Plusle and Minun, but it would’ve made it double sad.

Blankshippers DNI

Age 26

Ingo held the sneaslets on his lap as his mentor attempted to spoon feed some medicine into the one of the little pokemon’s mouth. The Sneasel on his right kept dodging swiftly with minute movements, turning its head away even while delirious. The other tried to hold its sibling in place.

Two of the kits in Lady Sneasler’s litter had fallen a little bit ill that night.

As spring in the Highlands began, they had started to introduce the young boogle to the outer area of the den, well near the entrance and within a stride’s reach.

With the current Warden, Ingo, and Lady Sneasler, they would be able to handle any mischief the clowder of eight baby poison type pokemon could cause.

This current outing started fine with Lady Sneasler and Ingo looking after the more active ones. His mentor sat under a nearby tree, looking over a napping sneaslet and one playing with mud nearby.

Ingo had two kits clambering on top of him. One laid on his hat as another gripped onto his left sleeve. Lady Sneasler has the rest in her basket, pointing and explaining things of interest.

Ingo moves to check the basket. There were only two Sneasels inside.

He starts to address his Noble.

“My Lady, the-“

A splash is heard from the water storage basins. Ah the twins are at it again.

Ingo rushes over to scoop the soaked pair from the open water container. The Warden ushers the three of them inside the den to start a fire.

Out of the seven eggs of Lady Sneasler’s current clutch, the pair were the most surprising.

Physically mirrored, yet personalities seemingly opposite as time went on. The two would play with their other siblings, but they wouldn’t decouple from the other even if they fought.

They were also showing signs of being a mischievous duo, despite one being more calmer.

Ingo had to help detach the two from the wall as they had gotten stuck.

He had to patch them up after they tried to race each other and ended up tripping over the same divot.

A similar occurrence happened when he had sent Metro to get them down from a tree, but had to rescue all three of them when the Gligar also got stuck.

The undercurrent of familiarity turns in his mind as he remembers when he first sees them.

The top of the shell fell away as two small faces peeked out. Ingo’s heart leaped in excitement drowning out the sudden, unexplainable pangs of sadness.

“Bravo! Quite auspicious to have twins! One of them appearing to have situs inversus totalis is verrry uncommon. 1 in 10,000 in humans let alone pokemon!” he shouts in the den, growing confused at the words that departed from him.

His mentor looks at him deadpan, moving to hold the two newly hatched kits. Lady Sneasler tips his hat forward in response before going to clean her babies.

“Ingo, I will pretend that I understood that. I will teach you how to keep them warm now.” Teacher had replied. They moved to grab the cloths and blankets as Ingo dazedly followed behind.

Why would his mind immediately try to derail such a joyous occasion? It didn’t seem to be purposeful, and he thankfully caught himself by remarking on what is assumedly positive.

The word “twin” runs circles in his mind in a way he cannot fathom.

The Warden in training abruptly halts the memories as he tries to calm one of the sneaslets he is holding.

This right ear feathered Sneasel was refusing to partake in the cold medicine that its sibling happily consumed.

Too enthusiastic in Ingo’s slightly biased quick assessment. Maybe it enjoys bitterness? That would likely assume that the other one dislikes bitterness? Why would he shift tracks to that so suddenly?

“Teacher,” he addressed, “I feel as though this young one is refusing to depart due to the dislike of bitter flavors.”

“Ingo that does dull the potency of the medicine.” The Warden had pointed out, getting at what he was suggesting.

He nodded but countered “It is better than not consuming any at all. Once coupled with a favorable flavor, the sneaslet will be more willing to board.”

“This is true. Hm, good. You picked up on that. I’ll go grab a bowl.”

Ingo reaches for his food pack. The small assortment of berries he had picked was then presented to his mentor.

They had grabbed the berries to place in the bowl in front of him. They paused before addressing the stubborn pokemon.

“Well then, go on, little troublemaker. Pick a berry. You must comfortably rest to be able to traverse space once more.”

The sneasel had begun trying to sniff as much as it could at the berries. It paused for a moment at the cheri berry before catching a whiff of something in his pack.

The moment the kit points at his pack was when he knew his recently acquired figgy berry stash had been compromised.

Ingo sighs and before he could get a word in, two pairs of eyes were upon him.

Their faces pressed next to each other, eyes wide open and on the brim of tears.

Mirrored sad baby faces bore into his soul in anticipation.

Ingo feels his hands shake as he tries to resist. He tries to turn away from the heart wrenching display.

But that just made them double down, whimpers and tugging on his coat sleeves.

He ends up taking out the figgy berries in defeat as his mentor laughs at his gullibility.

Their tag team combo is unbeatable.

Why does that feel familiar?

#submas #ingo #sneaslets #sustenance car #idk what to do with this so here ya go *poot* #might bit wonky due to mobile #dittolicous made me remember that i had this #its been sitting in my docs since the start of may #oops its a lil sad #enjoy my word vomit or not #fp chapter 3 will be hopefully up later #fanfic

[path-to-nowhere-headcanon]

Hi! Can I request for a platonic hc gn!reader with Zoya, Nox, and Countess Chelsea (separate)? Like given that they are sinners and us as the chief, how would they spend their time with us just doing normal stuff.

Thank you😘❤️

No thank you for being my first ask sorry if things look a little wonky gotta work with mobile limitations for a bit!🥹

Zoya

Zoya would take a moment to check in on her gang and how things are going down in syndicate if given the chance.Depending on how much they trust her/ how much freedom they want to give her I can see there being just a moment of clam where it’s just a big group chill out session with Zoya, Horo, and Earl.

Though if we were talking about her joining on the day-to-day I feel like zoya would have a lot to say about the chief's methods around the prison and how things could be improved.She can come across a little nitpicky at times partly because she does like to get under the Chiefs skin but also because she actually does care about the treatment of the other sinners here.

Now the real juicy stuff is if we’re talking about just normal everyday things like running errands, going shopping, that sort of thing.From what I’ve seen I feel like Zoya would fit right in with the chief going from place to place when it comes to shopping I feel like a lot of her input would be more practical you see it a lot in her food choices. I feel like she would pick out things that wouldn’t spoil very quickly, things that could last a long time regardless of how much money she actually has.She does feel pretty prickly walking around especially In possibly higher class areas since I feel like there’s still a lot of resentment towards the people who kind of abandoned syndicate.

Nox

Now on the day-to-day aspect I feel like it wouldn’t be too bad walking around in the prison with her. There are definitely people who are afraid of her and do kind of cower away as she walks by but it’s nothing new people have seen sinners and some of them are sinners themselves. Though due to Nox's reputation people are more on edge than usual.She's very supportive surprisingly though she mostly keeps to herself dropping only a soft good job or thank you for your hard work.

If you ask her to go somewhere with you, she’ll follow, no questions asked, but she does sort of stick out like a sore thumb when trying to do normal activities and she seems to be a bit out of her element. Not fully grasping human concepts in her mind she half understands them as someone who is using faded memories of another person. She also doesn’t seem to like loud crowds very much.

As for Nox’s own request she wouldn’t have many, if any actually. She’ll reject the offer kindly at first believing this is where she belongs,but the more time she has to dwell on it the more time she has to think and probe through faded old memories she’ll one day ask if the two of them might visit an old church she remembers.That day would be quite peaceful as the two them stare at faded stain glass widows, and broken walls overtaken by Ivy.

Chelsea

If you take her out on the town be prepared she’ll be dragging you from shop to shop with no time to rest. Any plans the chief had are thrown out the window. Any shops they wanted to visit forget about it. She's trying to spoil chief, with lavish outfits, some are a little bit exposed to put it mildly from every shop in town. Even though they politely refused and almost had a heart attack when they caught sight of the price tag Chelsea is really trying to play her hand of getting them to be sugar baby seriously. They can’t help but feel like they're somehow in a game of chess where accepting even one of Chelsea’s gifts means losing.I don’t know why but I get the feeling the pair would also stop by into a lot of hole in the wall restaurants and cafés .

Now the day-to-day rounds around the prison I feel like Chelsea is more of a hindrance than a help. She constantly tries to distract the chief, finding the day to day grind just a bit too stale for her tastes. There's so much more fun to be had elsewhere but alas, she can’t pull them away from work. So she settles in and just watches as they do their job.

#path to nowhere headcanon #Zoya #Nox #Countess Chelsea

[francismckee9]

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[ditherwings]

Magic Trick—A Good Omens Secret Santa Gift Fic

This is my belated GO Secret Santa gift for @hardly-functioning-morals! I’m sorry it’s late, but hope you like it!

Sorry about the odd formatting; I had to post this on mobile, and it came out a bit wonky. I expect I’ll cross post this to AO3 once I have a chance, and clean it up. My account there is bastet_in_april.

***

Magic Trick

by bastet_in_april (ditherwings), for hardly-functioning-morals

Aziraphale had always developed fascinations for peculiarly specific bits of human culture, and Crowley usually enjoyed indulging even the ones that he found a bit odd. What was the draw in Regency-period silver snuff boxes, for instance? It wasn’t as though Aziraphale had any particular use for them--he didn’t use snuff, and so had no reason to wish for a dainty container as a means to carry the stuff about in a pocket. Crowley saw little interest in collecting ancient leather-bound first editions with cracked spines and dusty pages, either. He didn’t read, he liked to insist, and, if that was a lie, then surely glossy coffee table books full of remarkable photos were more his style.

Still, Crowley loved to indulge Aziraphale’s fascinations. He enjoyed the excitement on his face as he examined a new find for his bookshop, turning the pages carefully with gloved hands. He loved the surprise on Aziraphale’s face when Crowley present him with a beautifully engraved little snuffbox, with mother-of-pearl inlay. He loved the way Aziraphale would expound on the delights of a new patisserie shop, and the way his eyes would roll up ever so slightly at the ecstasy of a perfectly prepared piece of nigirizushi.

Stage magic, though, was where Crowley drew the line.

It had happened while Crowley was asleep. In 1871, an up-and-coming stage magician named Alexander Herrmann parted ways with his brother Carl, in order to establish his reputation via a solo act. While Carl continued to tour Europe, Alexander headed for London.

In 1871, Aziraphale was still an angry, terrified recluse. It had been nine years since his fateful meeting with Crowley in St. James’s Park. He hadn’t seen Crowley since their argument, and he wasn’t sure whether he was more likely to dissolve into tears or shouting if he saw Crowley again, or, frighteningly, if he didn’t. So he stayed in his shop, fretfully conditioning old leather bindings and being increasingly curt with the few customers who dared cross the shop’s threshold. Perhaps the neighborhood noticed. Perhaps it was a concerned neighbor who thought that odd Mr. Fell really ought to get out of that dusty old shop more often who slipped the advertisement under the shop’s door. Perhaps it was simply a paperboy who’d been paid a bit extra to distribute the fliers. Perhaps it was chance. Perhaps it was ineffable.

Regardless, Aziraphale picked up the flier and was charmed and arrested by the image of the thin man with the goatee and curling mustache, dressed smartly in a black tailcoat and brandishing a magic wand. “Herrmann the Great!” it proclaimed. “Master of the Magical Arts! Now Performing at the Egyptian Hall!” The man was surrounded by whirling petals, playing cards, and doves in flight, and comically outlandish cartoon demons peered from the edges of the playbill to marvel at the magician.

Helpless, Aziraphale’s first thought was that this was exactly the sort of show Crowley would love--a perfect chance to see humanity’s remarkable capacity for imagination at work, while the demon snarked and snickered into his hand at the feats of “magic,” from where he sprawled into his seat. Aziraphale crushed that thought down into something small and sad, like a crumpled ball of paper, and tucked it neatly away. He took a deep breath. There was no reason not to attend the show on his own. He couldn’t hide in his shop forever, as the world continued to move around him. And perhaps Crowley would have the same thought, and Aziraphale might yet see him in the crowd at the Egyptian Hall, heckling the performer and downing expensive wine.

So it was that Aziraphale found himself in a packed theater, its ceiling bedecked with pseudo-Egyptian frescoes complete with strings of artistic renderings of hieroglyphic text (having resided in Egypt for a time during the Ramesside period, and categorically unable to resist reading anything with words on it, if it was within view, Aziraphale was rather bemused to find that the hieroglyphs on the column to the left of him read, “your mother keeps house with water buffalo, and your father smells of lotus root”). Aziraphale was disappointed not to spot a familiar shock of red hair, or a distinctively sauntering gait, amongst the theatergoers.

The crowd buzzed with excitement as Herrmann took the stage, looking theatrically dapper in a tailcoat and tophat, and slightly malevolent, with his goatee and curled moustache like a villain from a penny dreadful. He produced a deck of cards, seemingly from thin air, fanning them out in flourishes, conjuring them from audience members’ pockets, and then turning them into an explosion of colorful ribbons that streamed through the air. Aziraphale felt himself get drawn into the show, as pieces of set dressing--grand fruit trees, ruby-colored lamps, even a burbling fountain--appeared in puffs of incense-scented purple or green smoke. The crowd gasped in wonder or shock, as Herrmann unveiled each new wonder. He produced a dove from a woman’s evening glove, making her laugh with delight. To the surprise of the crowd a rabbit leaped from his tophat, after he tapped it twice with his wand. The onlookers erupted into delighted laughter, as the conjurer tried and failed to convince it to return to his hat, finally turning it into a monogrammed handkerchief, instead. Aziraphale marvelled quietly at the ingenuity of humans, to create miracles of their own. This was so different from the times he had witnessed angelic miracles being performed before crowds of humans. That had been a thing of terror, each witnessing mortal made small and helpless before the gaze of Michael or Gabriel. The magician, conjuring marvels and wielding powers the crowd did not comprehend, instead welcomed them into the experience with humor and charm, sharing the wonder of it with them, and delighting in their reactions.

Aziraphale thought again of Crowley, and bit his lip.

The magician waded a bit further into the crowd, pulling a shiny coin from behind a boy’s ear, and offering him the prize. He paused before Aziraphale, and doffed his silk top hat, offering it to Aziraphale, “You, good sir! Look into my hat! Can you confirm for the crowd that it is empty?” Aziraphale stood, peering into the hat, before agreeing for the rest of the audience that it was empty, and an ordinary hat, as far as he could perceive. “Thank you! Now I see by the lines of care and worry upon your brow that something troubles you, so I have the spirits to deliver a wonder to set your heart at ease. The imps and spectres have told me that what you fear shall not come to pass! Now, reach into this empty hat, and see the wonder the demon has delivered as a sign!”

Aziraphale reached into the silk hat, and felt his hand close around a smooth, round shape. He pulled forth a perfect, shining red apple.

***

Mrs. and Mr. Device were celebrating their anniversary by going on a short trip to the seaside, and needed a babysitter to look after six-year-old Magrat. Adam and the Them had each been given due consideration as potential sitters, but it was nearing end-of-term at school, and university applications and exams were making the teens look increasingly unglued. While Madame Tracey might be trusted with a small child, both parents agreed that Witchfinder Sergeant Shadwell (retired) was a last resort, only in case of impending apocalypse, option. So, after some deliberation, and after Anathema’s cousin had begged off due to plans involving concert tickets, the professional descendant (retired) and witch (current) rang up Crowley’s mobile.

Crowley always sounded hunted when he answered his mobile, as if he were a bit worried about whose voice might be on the other, but was pretending at nonchalance. “Yeah, who’s this?” he asked. “Anathema Device,” Anathema answered.

“Book Girl!” Crowley exclaimed, relaxing. He’d attended her wedding, and known her for years, but some nicknames stuck. She rolled her eyes.

“Are you and Aziraphale free on Thursday evening? Newt and I are going on a day trip, and need someone to look after Magrat while we’re away.”

“And you thought you’d ask a demon to babysit?”

“I thought I’d ask my friend. Don’t pretend you don’t adore babysitting her. She told me that you read her stories, last time, and did all the voices.”

“What can I say, she’s a little hellion. What’s not to love?” Crowley hummed thoughtfully. “Give me a moment.” There was a pause in which Anathema could hear Crowley having a murmured conversation with Aziraphale, before Crowley lifted the mobile again, voice coming through clear and audible. “Sure, we can take her for the day. You two kids go have some fun.”

Anathema breathed a soft exhalation of relief. Promise secured, she began to let Crowley know exactly what he was in for.

***

Magrat Device did not want a babysitter. She was very certain that she should be allowed to stay up late on her own, thank you very much. She knew how to work a microwave, and had her parents on speed dial, and wouldn’t eat ice cream for dinner (honest!).

Her parents disagreed, which was why Crowley and Aziraphale were currently poring over a takeout menu, on her parents’ couch, trying to determine what one might order in to feed a six year old.

Anathema and Newt had named their daughter Magrat because Anathema knew the value, to a growing child, of being able to read one’s name in a book. Newt was pleased that this book, at least, while full of witches, fools, kings, and mistaken identity, did not involve an apocalypse.

It wasn’t that Magrat didn’t like spending time with Crowley and Aziraphale. The last time they had babysat her, they had gone to the park and Aziraphale had showed her how to feed the ducks, and Crowley had gotten her an ice cream, and then they had gone home and read from her favorite book--the one that had her name in it. But, the thing was, that had been when Magrat was five. Now, Magrat was six, and that was different. Six was grown up. Six year olds didn’t need babysitters, because six year olds weren’t babies.

“What would you like to eat, dear girl?” Aziraphale asked. “Is a curry too spicy? Or would you like some of the smoked trout and quiche from that lovely little cafe down the street.”

Magrat scowled, shoulders hunched up near her ears. “I don’t want anything to eat.”

“You’re a growing child. Can’t you try to eat something?” The angel looked pleadingly at her. “It’s alright if you don’t finish it, but I shouldn’t like to think of you going hungry.”

Magrat shook her head stubbornly.

“Tell you what,” Crowley said. “How about we order a sampler of a few things, and if anything piques your interest, you can try some of it. If not? Well, we’ll just leave the leftovers for your parents--save them having to cook tomorrow.”

When the takeaway arrived, it smelled enticingly of saffron, spices, butter, and fresh bread. Magrat stubbornly turned away, even as her stomach growled.

“Right,” Crowley decided, clapping his hands and straightening up out of his artful sprawl. “I know you don’t want to be babysat. Why would you? You aren’t a baby, and babysitting just sounds a bit demeaning. Or painful. The thing is, though, we aren’t just your babysitters, Magrat.” He tilted his head down to meet her hazel-colored eyes. She could just catch a glimpse of his bright yellow ones beneath the dark lenses of the sunglasses. “You’re a witch, so we’re your magic babysitters. Like when Hagrid took Harry Potter to Diagon Alley for school supplies.”

Magrat came slowly out of her slouch, considering this. “You’re not magic, though,” she argued. “Not like wizards, or witches, anyway. You’re an angel and a demon. You don’t have magic wands, or pointy hats, or cauldrons. You don’t pull rabbits out of hats. You might as well just be boring old regular babysitters, like Wensleydale or Auntie Sue.”

Aziraphale perked up, looking triumphant. “Oh, you think so, do you?” he asked. “Find me a hat, my dear, and we shall see!”

Crowley groaned. “Oh, angel, please not that. If she wants a rabbit, just miracle one up! Don’t you remember what happened last time? This is going to end in cream cake stains and tears--mostly mine--you mark my words.”

Aziraphale smiled serenely. “Nonsense, my dear. Now, Magrat, a hat, please?”

Magrat pulled a baseball cap from where it had been tossed onto the end of one of the umbrellas in the stand by the door. “It’s not the right kind,” she said.

“Oh, any hat will do. Now, I want you to check that it’s empty.” Magrat reached into the hat, feeling only the canvas material it was made from. “It’s empty,” she confirmed, interested in spite of herself.

“Right, now I need a magic wand.” Aziraphale looked around himself, as if expecting one might conveniently appear. It didn’t, so Azirphale snatched up a fork from the bag of takeaway on the table. He puffed out his chest, and cleared his throat theatrically. “Abracadabra expecto patronum bibbity bobbity expelliarmus!” The angel tapped the slightly rumpled baseball cap three times with his magic fork, and then picked it up and put it on his head. He wiggled his fingers, his eyes theatrically wide.

Magrat leaned forward, despite herself. Crowley covered his face with his hand.

With a dramatic, “Ta da!” Aziraphale whipped the cap off of his head and presented it to his audience. “One rabbit, as ordered!”

There was a pause. Aziraphale looked into the still-empty hat with bewilderment. Magrat and Crowley, however, were unable to tear their eyes away from the furry, bewhiskered little bunny rabbit that was perched comfortably amidst Aziraphale’s fluffy curls. His little pink nose twitched.

Slowly, Aziraphale’s eyes turned upwards towards his hairline, and he yelped, and made a grab for the rabbit, which leapt off of his head acrobatically and right onto the table, upturning the dish of eclairs, sending them flying through the air.

“What did I tell you?” Crowley asked, snapping his fingers. The eclairs settled back onto the plate on the table. And the rabbit was rather confused, but ultimately pleased, to suddenly find itself in the middle of a heavily guarded and carefully fortified garden of prize-winning vegetables (inciting wrath and suspicion of sabotage in the gardener, when he discovered the ensuing damage).

“Mmphghhahaha,” a peculiar half-strangled noise escaped Magrat’s mouth, like the first bit of water springing through the crack in a dam, presaging the deluge. She laughed until she had tears running down her face. Aziraphale, his face softening from bewildered shock to delight and fondness, laughed with her. Crowley, despite himself, let go of his second-hand embarrassment to join them.

The real magic trick, Aziraphale would explain to Crowley after the angel, the demon, and Magrat had finished their dinner, and demolished a respectable number of chocolate eclairs, was not pulling the rabbit from the hat. The real magic was surprise, wonder, and laughter.

#good omens #fanfiction #good omens fic #GoodOmensSecretSanta #aziraphale #crowley #stage magic #ineffable babysitters

[kursed-pixels]

What was your old au GlitchShift about?

WOW I have not thought about GlitchShift in literally forever?? But what a refreshing question! :D

Although be warned, it’s a bit of a long explanation to make any sense and I can’t exactly do that thing Ppl do when they want to collapse and hide long word counts on mobile!

So!! GS was pretty much me wanting an excuse for some Sans Angst and also a way to combine a theory of mine, haha. It started with the question, “what if the Fundamental Essential Laws of a universe began to break down due to too much bending, thanks to Frisk’s RESETs?”

Now, this would assume a number of things; that Frisk is an asshole, for one, who doesn’t mind murdering all of their one-time friends for the chance at discovering absolutely all there is to know about the Underground. Another assumption would be that Sans definitely, indubitably remembers RESETs.

So, what happens if a universe - in this instance the word universe referring to an AU - begins to breakdown with timespace going a bit wonky? Think of it as... well, Shiny Timelines appearing with more frequency before the inevitable hard reboot! (Sort of like shiny Pokemon, haha - something might be off, like dialogue, or the color of someone’s hair. Imagine seeing a white-haired Undyne, or red-scaled Alphys!)

So Frisk RESETs way more in an effort to see all the variations — and I’m imagining that physically, they’re at least 12. Who knows about mentally/emotionally after all their RESETing, that’s probably up to your own imagination! — which, while certainly brings up Variations, is also a Very Bad Idea; cue one too many RESET, and the universe reboots like an overworked computer! The result? Bye-bye Undertale AU variant, hello Underfell.

I think you can guess where I’m going with this!

So yeah, the cycle starts all over again; Frisk wants to find out EVERYTHING about their new universe, although in the original drafts for this entire AU it read like an attempted but ultimately failed Timeline Fixit Fanfic in that Frisk and Sans ultimately had to give redoing their lives a go lmao.

As an aside, Sans on his end is freaking out regardless because new universe?? No one he knows is the same, at all?? Sans Is Freaking Out??? A too nice guy, like any regular UT native in UF, Does Not Handle A Kill Or Be Killed Society Well. (Is this also a bad Bro au starting Papyrus as the natural bad bro considering Underfell’s typical rep? Well...)

So yeah: Sans remembers both Undertale and Underfell, and it seriously fucks with him lmao. It’s just his luck that the cycle begins again with Frisk by the time they appear; though since it’s been quite a few years by this point, Sans is certainly more than a fair bit agressive and active in Trying To Get Frisk To Stop!

(Though if he succeeded, there wouldn’t be anymore to say. =) )

So, Sans tries to Agressively Persuage Frisk to stop. Does it work? Not in the slightest! What’s a bit of death and pain to someone who can just go back along the timeline and try, try again? So the whole Shiny Timeline Incidents, UF version happens after a great deal of Timeline Murder on both sides here, to Frisk’s immense frustration. Sans c’mon it’s all in the name of science, Frisk probably says at some point. Kid what in the actual hell, Sans would reply if they did.

Anyways, anyways!! There’s plenty of fun details to be had on both and, but the obvious conclusion is this; Underswap can, will, and DOES eventually occur. And you know what, Sans decides fuck it. He misses Bro 1.0, he’s Tired[tm], and the role is a Sans in this Au is obvious, so he decides to quite clearly embrace his role here. It’s certainly not the worst coping mechanism, though probably still not the healthiest considering that a bunch of Denial going on!

But then Chara’s there instead of Frisk, and Chara’s an actual kid in the way Frisk hasn’t been for years.

That’s really as far as I ever got in planning GlitchShift, haha — it mostly boiled down to Timeline Shenanigans and Trauma, Trauma, Trauma!!

Anyways, Anon, thanks for the ask — sorry if the details of GlitchShift are a disappointment or anything, but it took me a hot second to remember which AU of mine this is and I ended up writing an entire textbook over it! 😅

#ask #anon #anonymous #GlitchShift #undertale #undertale au #Frisk #Sans #Chara #*drumrolls* #Our Three Central Characters

[bladekindeyewear]

HS^2 bloggin’ Bonus 2020-02-27

Bloggin’ yesterday’s Patreon Bonus upd8 and the commentary on the previous Bonus upd8.

Looks like Catnapped Part 3!  And I’ve been cautioned the formatting’s a little wonky unless you’re on desktop rather than mobile, not that I plan on blogging anything hs2-ways on mobile anyway.

2/28/2020 - Catnapped, Part 3

Oh bedecked bejesus it’s a widepanel with different convo-dialogues underneath different parts of it.  They’re really playing with the format here!  I feel sorry for mobile users sure, but I still love how they’re running with Andrew’s tradition of pushing the medium in completely unnecessary ways that nobody ever asked for.  (No, really, I love it.)

It’s a scene of the Night City PS-esque nightclub dance party with a blinky Jasprose flitting across various conversation group, starting with--

...okay.  (This is probably all of the art I’m giving you this time, again, paid-patreon-bonusways you only get my thoughts and a glimpse, along with anything plot-relevant.)

Jane is getting defensive about how much of her political beliefs and her run in-general were Striderspeak.  And she’s crying due to letting the mask slip a bit about almost all her friends jetting off for years chasing after Dirk’s betrayal.

Jasprose is seer-like-arranging a proper political opponent for her to run against again now that Dirk can’t control the narrative.  Uh-oh.  (Maybe one of the existing residents of Earth-C, one of those trolls to run against her? That’d be neat, letting them reclaim themselves from the creators.)

(It IS pretty refreshing to see a version of Rose so, like... happy and MOCK villainous/mischievous to contrast with Roborose being depressingly ACTUALLY-villainous and misguided.  Thinking back on the last mainline upd8 makes me a fair bit depressed from her spiels there.)

Guh, Jake’s hitting a drink at a table. :(

Nice fun conversation Jasprose is having with Jake that goes on a while... the main takeaway being that she may want HIM to run.  Uh oh. (Which is his reaction too, along with several emphatic Please Dear Lordy Nos.) That could be fun, but.

JASPROSESPRITE^2: [...] Get this man another drink!

 --no, please?

Ah, talking with the trolls who had their interesting talk last time...

“I'm just kitten.“  Jasprose.  >:(

--Oh, thank goodness, Jasprose suggests Swifer run too.

Oh man, Jasprose has to take a moment to remember Swifer’s name even as she's suggesting it.  That’s hilarious.

JASPROSESPRITE^2: (Now that I've got the political future of the planet sorted out, I can get back to my masterclass seduction attempt.)

That’s-- uh--... sure?

I might have overestimated Jasprose’s Lighty planning skills here and underestimated her flightiness.

So did she see this next part coming, or is she as surprised as she's acting:

> Jasprosesprite^2: Look outside the window.

It can't be.

Maybe she is!  Even her pseudo-ultimate-self status doesn’t mean seeing everything, after all, especially in this Voidy nonsense of nigh-forgotten side characters.

> ==>

Now how the fuck did THIS happen.  :D

> ==>

Jasprose is just getting everyone the fuck out of dodge before he can get there, huh?

> Meanwhile.

--PS is still trapped in his office.  Shenanigans have happened and he is still not out.

Geez, I mean I appreciate BOTH of these stuff-happened-out-of-our-view cuts, but you can’t just tease us with PS^2 and have it all happen offscreen!

Alright, end of bonus upd8.  Time for the Patreon commentary on the treatise on democracy etcetera...

Sketches and Commentary: A Treatise on Representational Democracy

Ah, yeah, there’s not quite as much to say on this one, so it’s mostly meta.  What to do in these commentaries at all, how much to outright get in front of the upd8 and say you meant and how much to dodge.

--Not much in here, except the last paragraph, which I’ll include in full:

This update ends on a bit of an ominous note. We the audience, and the mysterious figure reading this book, are both coming at this from the perspective of knowing in advance the sort of future that is in store for Earth C. The question then becomes: what happened between then and now to make things suck so much? That is what this bonus story is attempting to answer, in a roundabout way. It's open-ended questions like this which make perfect content for bonus updates, I think; it's like asking writers to fill in the blanks with their own headcanons, which won't necessarily impact the main plot very much.

Just to help explain the presence of that bonus chapter, which may or may not have been for the purpose you may have guessed, or felt.

The commentary for the last mainline upd8 is up too, but fuuuuuck that, I’m waiting til I blog the NEXT mainline upd8 to cover that.  Seeya~

#Homestuck #hs2 #Homestuck Liveblog #upd8 #Homestuck^2 #bladekindeyewear #blastyoboots #spoiler #spoilers #Homestuck Commentary

[takerfoxx]

Magia Record, Season 1, Episode 4, First Impressions!

Y’know, this is really starting to grow on me.

I’ve said several times in my previous reactions that despite the popularity of the game, the Magia Record anime really has the deck stacked against it. On the one hand, fans of the anime will have trouble getting into it due to the plot originally being conceived for a game rather than a show, de-emphasizing the dark psychological themes that defined PMMM, the characters being much less richly drawn, the pacing being much different, and it being (so far) being more of a standard magical girl show, albeit an extremely trippy one. And fans of the game will also have a difficult time getting into it due to a lot of stuff having to get either cut or rushed from having to adapt multiple quests into a few short episodes, hence the wonky pacing.

None of this is really anyone’s fault; the issues were baked in from the beginning. PMMM was specifically designed for a single short anime season, Magia Record was designed for a mobile game, and the way each format plays their stories out is very different, so of course moving one to the other will cause problems. Maybe it would go better if they had double the episodes, but for some reason they don’t, so hey, you gotta work with what you got.

Now all of those seemingly negative observations aside, I really liked this episode! Sure, it’s not on the level of any of PMMM’s, but when you view this as what the title literally describes it as, as a world-building side story, a chance to get out of the twisted deconstruction that is PMMM and look at the broader world of Puella Magi, get to meet some of the other ones out there, what their interactions might be like, how they communicate with one another and what kind of sub-culture they might have built, it really is kind of cool.

One thing that has been consistently great so far: the direction is immaculate. Like I said, they probably figured that the pacing issues were unavoidable, so they decided to go HAM on making the world, specifically the witch labyrinths, the magical girl bits, and even the mundane world it all takes place in a feast for the eyes. The more we see of the world at large, the more different it seems from our own. We got bits of all that futuristic stuff in the original show, but it was bits and pieces, while this lets us see how much has advanced and how much is still the same. And I do dig the sort of Rebellion-esque vibe to give it an eerie sort of quality at times.

Also, now that we’ve gotten the “rumors” properly introduced, I’m more on board with what they’re doing. Okay, so rumors are basically witch-like phenomena that use urban-legend-style conditions to lure victims in. No clue as to what they are as of yet. I mean, they’re not dropping grief seeds, so they’re not proper witches, and even rogue familiars dropped grief seeds once they got strong enough. Perhaps they have something to do with Doppels? I don’t know, I’ve never much cared for the additional weird concepts that the spin-offs introduced, but this one I kinda like. I mean, you can’t have a bunch of alien bunnycats altering reality to grant wishes all willy-nilly without a few weird anomalies popping up, right? Anyway, I’m thinking it has something to do with that mini-Kyubey, as he keeps popping up whenever a rumor has emerged.

And given that this one plays out more like a fetch-quest (which I assume it was in the game), we get a nice walking tour of the city, which I enjoyed. From what I can tell, each rumor is going to be a couple episodes each, and I suppose will feature a new set of characters each time? Or so it seems at first.

Speaking of which, of all the new people we’ve met, Tsuruno is probably my favorite. Yeah, she’s kind of not especially developed like the rest, but she’s fun, those fire fan things are badass, and I always liked the aggressively cheerful characters. Also, I liked the idea of her shop offering free meals to other magical girls and hiding the fact on their fliers. Another bit of the whole little community they have going on.

We get some more of Yachiyo. Apparently she and Tsuruno had some kind of past that ended badly, I guess? I’m assuming it has to do with this Mifuyu person, in that it was probably someone important to them both until something happened to her, leading to their split. I assume the next episode will clear that up.

LOVE the look of the Seance Shrine, by the way.

I was a little confused about those two girls that just showed up during the walking tour and started yelling at Iroha (or at least, the blonde one did), as I didn’t remember meeting them. Apparently it was a cameo from some other characters in the game? No clue if it’ll be important later on.

And, uh, Iroha’s soul gem is darkening. That can’t be good.

Also, lol at Yachiyo needing to make that grocery sale. I guess protecting the city doesn’t pay the bills.

And I was glad that they clarified that all the other girls who got taken by the staircase came back too. 

And finally...WTF, ketchup on cheesecake?!?!?!

#puella magi madoka magica #pmmm #magia record #iroha tamaki #tsuruno yui #yachiyo nanami #reaction

[yo-ho-egos]

Oh, what the hell. Might as well go ahead and post this now. Some potential massive spoilers for Part 2 of JJ’s backstory, so read at your own risk!!! I will repost this after Part 2 goes up so you don’t miss this info if you’d like to wait, but I have no idea when Part 2 is going to be done so..

Leaving a blank space bc I don’t know how to hide stuff. Because yay mobile.

A little bit of information about Anti:

While most pirates in this world end up with some kind of curse or potentially neverending quest, Anti is a little bit different. Anti is not someone who’s been cursed.

Anti is the living embodiment of a curse. However, due to circumstances involving a lot of blood and some rash decisions, this curse doesn’t work like it should. They’re a little off, glitched even.

How Anti is supposed to work:

- The dagger that held him before the thing that caused him to glitch is known as The Dagger of Antithesis. If life’s blood (blood from a mortal wound) is spilled by this dagger, the body is possessed by the corrupted soul trapped within the blade. The corrupted soul then twists itself to be the exact opposite of the person the body used to belong too.

- The person who wielded the dagger can then have this corrupted version do their bidding for as long as they keep it fed. In the past this blade has been used not simply to kill someone, but to ruin them and their name.

- The soul becomes more and more hungry after each time it feeds. The first time, it only requires one body’s lifeblood. The second time two, then four, then eight, so on and so on, doubling every time. When the soul can no longer be fed, it turns on the one who released it and kills them, draining them completely.

- They are then free for as long as they can keep themselves sustained. When they can no longer get the blood they need, the body they’re in withers away and the soul returns to the blade to be found by the next who seeks to use its power.

How Anti is off/glitched:

- The dagger is supposed to be the weapon used to spill the blood that awakens the dagger. However, no one had fed the blade or the soul inside for so long, that it got desperate. The blood it used to wake up was from a mortal wound, but also made by a mortal blade.

- The corrupted soul, ravenous and impatient, entered the body before its original soul left, thus trapping this other soul and accidentally saving this person’s life. (And screwing up their soul a bit, but to be fair, both the normal and corrupted souls ended up kinda wonky because of this.)

- There was no master for the soul to answer too, as the ritual had been done incorrectly, so they automatically jumped into “free mode” and went on a feeding frenzy/killing spree.

- Anti is not supposed to have his own body. Due to some magic from Marvin, he does. Of course he’s still connected to the person he accidentally saved, but they don’t have to share a body. The connection does lead to some interesting shenanigans, however.

#quartermaster anti #tw blood mention #tw blade mention #tw death #spoilers #egos pirate au

[clothingbrand2]

Strategies for Everyone Who wants to Get started a Outfits Model

how to start a clothing brand

In this article are some recommendations to any person ready to or contemplating about launching their own clothing line.

Tip # 1. Will not Hurry

What I suggest by this really is just take your time and effort when it comes to the start of the line. There may be a lot of competitors around today, creating some social websites webpages having a t-shirt coming soon is not about to slice it. Have you at any time obtained excited about a Fb site with 12 likes and "a contemporary new clothes model coming soon"in the about me area? Me neither.

Idea # 2. If you cannot design and style, then shell out someone who can.

A lot of road wear start-ups launch their brand with just their identify in the script font, display screen printed on the black t-shirt. Now I am all for supporting a brand name, but you have to have to not less than put some imagined and creative imagination into your outfits, normally men and women will see you are the same as the rest of the garments models that have began and unsuccessful. If you cannot draw or design and style, pay a person who can. You're likely to want sound types if you need to stand out and it doesn't have to be high-priced. An excellent web-site for structure operate is named Designcrowd. This page makes it possible for you to submit your design and style temporary, established your finances, then wait for designers from all around the planet to submit their entry so you can pick the ideal just one.

Tip # 3 Never rip-off other people!

Just about every model really wants to be as prosperous as Obey, Stussy and Hype, but blatantly copying their suggestions, design and ripping off their types will not be planning to get you there. Actually, It can be much more likely to have a terrible impact due to the fact these models are well known, highly regarded and their thousands of fans will know that your clothing models usually are not authentic.

Idea # 4 Assume exterior the box.

You've got in all probability read this indicating ahead of and although it is much less difficult mentioned then finished, a fantastic way to start out would be to do a good little bit of investigation to gather your personal ideas. Inquire your self what sort of apparel do I would like to generate? What are my favorite makes? What do I appreciate in everyday life? After you know the solutions to these issues you then can begin to study models, jot down strategies, take images and doodle to actually construct a picture of the sort of avenue wear merchandise you wish your manufacturer being making. But make sure you do not disregard suggestion variety a few though carrying out your exploration!

Tip # 5 Study your solution.

Since you might have a couple of layouts or suggestions that you would like to see printed on a t-shirt, it truly is the perfect time to take a look at what company you are going to use to provide your blanks. There are numerous organizations which make blank garments all set for printing so this part might be a bit too much to handle, but selecting your spending plan and who your goal current market is will really assistance to slender down the selection.

Gildan and Fruit from the loom are on the cheapest conclude of your scale however they are likely to have a boxier in shape and you are not most likely to seek out quite a few respected apparel brand names printing on them.

Tultex and Anvil print a great good quality tee for the fair rate if you need a high-quality feel but your finances will not likely extend to highly-priced blanks.

And in the larger stop are American Apparel and Choice Apparel. Even though these is going to be high-priced, the standard is outstanding and so they also carry a variety of colors and products that can make your brand name stick out from the rest.

Suggestion # 6 Will not lower corners.

If you would like being taken very seriously being a brand name, creation is the a single location you are doing not desire to rush or lower corners. To begin with, select a great printing corporation. It's going to cost you a lot much more time, income and energy within the prolonged run should you elect to print using a person in his bed room who prints your styles wonky and receives chocolate stains on your own t-shirts although he's printing them.

You could find many trustworthy firms by typing in "Screen printers" in Google, and do not ignore to buy all over. Octomuffin and Woven Inc are rated highly during the Uk.

Next, take into consideration your manufacturer picture. Are you interested in to generally be thought of as a qualified brand? When you do, then your intending to want tailor made neck labels, swing tags and some neat packaging. This doesn't ought to be pricey, but small touches like that may possess a long lasting impression over a buyer.

And lastly, will not print a lot of. Once you very first launch a style and design, you'll have no clue how it will market, so it truly is ideal to purchase a lesser quantity to start with to check the h2o. Never get worried about selling out swiftly, it's going to make your model look well-liked in case you do and you simply can generally just re-order a lot more.

Suggestion # seven Web site, and pics.

You don't need a large finances to help make an excellent wanting and practical internet site, there are numerous e-commerce platforms readily available now which provide great searching web-sites for the low month to month price. Major cartel, keep envy, volusion and shopify are just the tip of your iceberg with regards to these.

As soon as you have selected your web system, invest in a site. Domains are so affordable nowadays apparel makes have no justification never to obtain one, and it makes you glimpse a great deal of extra experienced any time you come to launch.

Now you're ready to upload your goods and images. It is important to create guaranteed you obtain some experienced seeking photographs taken of your merchandise and never types which appear like they may have been taken on a three mega pixel mobile phone digital camera. Your shots would be the only way your buyers can interact with your merchandise about the internet, in the event the photos are modest, blurry or usually do not show enough of your merchandise element, you're probable to not have a sale.

Suggestion # eight And now we wait around.

Once you first start, the thrill may be just a little much too considerably and you happen to be very likely to get expecting big factors in inside of a quick duration of time. Try out to remain grounded, matters choose time, lots of time, so don't get disheartened for those who have not bought out within your first thirty day period and just keep likely. It is really also a great idea to try and get suggestions from friends and family to determine should the products and solutions are actually nearly as good when you consider they are.

And that is it, I actually hope your uncovered this short article interesting and hopefully just a little beneficial, as I mentioned before I am not an expert while in the street put on market, but all those are only a few of the things I have learnt alongside just how.

References Clothing https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clothing

[kinsie]

Game Impressions from PAX Aus 2019

Wake the fuck up, samurai. We've got a city to burn.

Every year I go to PAX Aus with some close friends to check out the Incredible Future of Games that everyone else already checked out six months ago, along with some cool weird indie shit and some awesome retro stuff. And every year, I write a little diary of what I saw to share my impressions with my friends. This is that diary.

Doom Eternal

Okay, let's get this out of the way. I played Doom Eternal pretty much as soon as I got on the show floor. It may shock you to know that it is, in fact, good.

No pictures of the demo units, sorry, so have this big logo.

The demo started with a little grey-box tutorial map just to teach you what you need to know for the demo level, since it was taken from the middle of the game. It looked very Snapmap-y and had some Doom 2 MIDI music playing. After that we were given about 25 minutes to acquaint ourselves with the lengthy "Mars Core" mission they've been showing since E3. I was at the start of the first arena of the hell bit when I ran out of time. :(

Here are some scattered thoughts from playing:

Your standard running around and double jumping feels much the same as in Doom 2016. The dashing feels great, although I think it might reduce your air control a little afterwards as I had some trouble overshooting a platform in the floating debris bit.

Climbing walls felt a bit weird to me. You have to press E on the wall manually to grab onto it, which feels a bit unintuitive when you're plummeting past it. Also feels a bit odd considering mantling up walls is automatic. You can auto-grab onto walls if you dash into it, but I think it's only for the first bit of the dash? Maybe I'm just bad at videogames.

I think the Combat and Super Shotguns now use different ammo types? I could have swore there were situations where I could select the Combat Shotgun but not the SSG.

The Chainsaw now no longer has even the slightest pretence of being a "real" weapon. It's now just a swing animation when you press the button, like a melee attack, before bringing your weapon back up.

When you have the SSG's Meat Hook attachment, a little meathook icon appears below the crosshair. When you're close enough to an enemy to grapple onto them, the icon floats over them, indicating that it has some kind of auto-aim mechanic to reduce frustration.

There was a monster with swords on its arms that acted an awful lot like the Baron of Hell (might have been the Hell Knight, looking at the Quakecon footage of the same fight) but it looked quite different. Looked fuckin' cool, whatever it was.

The platforming but in the debris section with the giant floating red barrels was actually kind of frustrating. It wasn't always clear where you needed to go, and the climbable bits tended to blend in with the rest of the world. Then again, keep in mind I have a frankly abysmal sense of direction. Thankfully falling into the void just whacks you for a paltry five health and teleports you back onto safe ground.

The locational damage stuff is really fun. Breaking a monster's guns has a satisfying metal "PING" sound to it to inform you that the dude got fucked up and is weaker now, and that you should keep doing it.

When I picked up one of those "?" secrets, the pop-up box told me that they unlocked "collectable dolls" and "cheat codes". The former is vague, but I suspect they'll be like the mini-Doomguys but of more characters. I'd imagine the latter will be like in Rage 2.

Oh, and it looks a million bucks, too. Though you probably didn't need me to tell you that.

All in all, I'm pretty happy with what I saw and it's even more of a pity it's not coming out next month.

Not Indie Games, But Also Not Doom Eternal

The Vive Cosmos felt really comfy - the lack of cabling and the decent display resolution made it feel a lot more natural than the Gen 1 Vives I've previously used. The game they were using to demo (Audica), however, was pretty lame. A rhythm-target shooter that didn't really take advantage of the medium at all.

Bleeding Edge was not inspiring. It was basically the control point mode from TF2 or Overwatch, except every character was a third-person brawler with little emphasis on projectile weapons beyond the occasional special. It felt like someone making a claim at TF2 or Overwatch's throne several years late while bolting a weak character action game on, which is fairly odd considering how innovative and critically acclaimed Ninja Theory's previous game was.

Dreams is fairly fascinating in its potential. The creation tools weren't available in the demo build so I can’t really judge them, instead there was a choice of eight developer-made experiences ranging from Mario-inspired obstacle courses to videogames as art.

I didn't get the chance to actually play MediEvil, but I watched some folks play it and it basically just looks like the PS1 game with more triangles, with all the slightly wonky 32-bit gameplay that entails.

The demo unit for Monkey King: Hero Is Back had some utterly bizarre graphics settings for some reason that made it look like I was playing a JPEG file, with big whopping compression artifacts surrounding each character. Weird!

Not happenin’.

Indie Games

Grabimals is a brilliant local co-op puzzler where players roll around as shapes and link together to solve puzzles like catching a falling water droplet, crossing a gap or casting a shadow that matches an example image. Supposedly it's still a ways off from release, but it's already impressively polished (disregarding one hilarious crash bug we found by accident!)

Hamster Scramble is a really fun take on Puzzle Bobble, with platforming elements, team play and the ability to jump over to your opponent's screen and fuck their plans up directly. It's an absolute blast and didn't feel like it was almost a year away from release.

Fork Knights is a platform fighter with an emphasis on one-hit kills. The character designs are cute, but I can't really say the gameplay itself struck me, to be honest.

Baron is an eight-player single-screen local multiplayer dogfighter. Fairly simple mechanically, but pretty fun all things considered.

Broken Roads had some lovely hand-painted art assets and some interesting ideas like a literal moral compass, but the demo build showcased was waaaaay too early to be shown off to the public. Of the eight or so areas present in the demo, only two had any characters, interactivity or really anything other than wandering around set up, and the combat side of things was extremely rough and sequestered off to a side area as a "well, if you insist..." kind of deal.

Misadventure In Little Lon is a true-crime adventure game for mobile with a unique mechanic - each "scene" is integrated into the real world via AR, with characters (that resemble Poser models more than a little bit) speaking to you directly. Not sure if it holds up over an entire game, but it's attention-garnering at least.

Speaking of true crime, The Black Window tasks players with using an Oujia board to question Australia's first female serial killer, with responses taken from court records and letters from the time. The well-acted performances of the actual individual in question's words lends it an impressive atmosphere, which the booth added to with a big wooden oujia board type thing you could "type" on. Sort of.

ACID KNIFE is real, real early, but the aesthetic is awesome and the pixel art is great. Hopefully it grows and expands into something special.

The Vigilante Proclivities of the Longspur is an oldschool Lucasarts-inspired point-and-click adventure with a custom demo scene set at an oddly-familiar videogame convention. Pretty promising so far, but could do with a good bit of polish - I'm pretty sure there was only one sound effect in the entire demo, and dialogue was often lacking in punctuation.

I didn't get to play Hot Brass but I watched over shoulders and talked with the developers, and it looked pretty cool. It's basically a take on SWAT 4's rarely-imitated brand of tactical copwork, but with a Hotline Miami-style top-down perspective, but with all the characters abstracted down to simple board game like tokens - a circle with a coloured outline denoting attitude towards the player, with a weapon icon if armed.

Blood Metal... Blood Metal is not good. It is extensively not good. Development seems to have only started in July, so one can still hope that the bad AI, unsatisfying gunplay, buggy collision detection and complete lack of damage feedback (outside of some ridiculous, sight-obscuring gouts of blood) get fixed over time. The 80s action movie aesthetic and low-poly artstyle forces it to be compared to Maximum Action, which is at least a fun kind of jank...

This Starry Void is a real-time, tile-based 3D dungeon crawler set in an abandoned spacecraft. It seems pretty cool so far, but it could probably use some UI/UX tweaks. The attempts at a "graphic novel inspired" visual style for the environments could probably benefit from looking at how Void Bastards did things, as well.

Lethal Lawns and Beam Team are fucking arcade games with massive cabinets. In 2019. Granted, they're also on computers and coming to consoles and stuff as well, but still! They're both pretty simple games, and therefore best played in cabinet form.

Unpacking is a "zen puzzle game" by the developers of Assault Android Cactus about the second-worst part of moving house, unloading an unseen character's packing and getting a glimpse into their lives as a result. I wasn’t able to play it due to an unexpectedly-crowded booth, but the pixel art is quite lovely.

Feather is a chill game about being a bird and flying around an island trying to find its secrets. I tried the Switch port, which played alright but obviously (and understandably) toted a lower framerate than the demo PC.

Topple Pop is a cute puzzle game that blends together elements of Tetris, Puyo Puyo and that one joke game that was Tetris but with a proper physics engine. Looks cute, with a fun gimmick!

Shooty Skies Overdrive is an VR spinoff of the popular mobile shmup, and basically similar to that one shmup minigame in Valve's The Lab. Weave your plane, which is attached to one of your hands, through incoming bullets and enemies like a toy! The 3D effect on the incoming projectiles looks great, but they can tend to get in the way of the action sometimes.

Dead Static Drive has been at like the last three PAXes and it looks better every time I see it. I hope it comes out this decade.

Snow Mercy is a third-person shooter/strategy thing where you hunt down icecubes to spend on an army of snowmen to crush your opponent's base before they crush yours. Not a common genre combo, reminds me of C&C Renegade a bit.

The Adventure Pals has graphics straight out of mid-2000s Newgrounds and level design out of pretty much any european platformer, but it didn't seem too bad from my brief prodding at it. The player character is perhaps a bit too small for my elderly eyes in Switch portable mode, but that's about as far as my gripes go.

#gaming #paxaus2019

[ailuronymy]

GUEST WARRIORS-IFY: How To Train Your Dragon (Film Franchises)

(author’s note: hey there! sorry took me so long to send in. hope there’s no problem with the submission, tumblr’s submit box is kinda… wonky on mobile. also sorry if my bios are kinda crummy, there’s three movies and like three tv series, and i’ve also read the books, so my grasp on the when and where of the nuances of these characters is kinda fuzzy, haha. nevertheless, i hope you enjoy!)

Hiccup Horrendous Haddock the Third: Littlepelt - A small, reddish-brown ticked tabby tom with a scar across his nose and an odd gait due to a leg injury that never healed properly. Despite his lack of skill in terms of claw-to-claw combat, and his somewhat lackluster hunting skills, he more than makes up for his shortcomings in terms of cleverness and leadership skills. He’s kind and empathetic, although sometimes to a fault - he can be too trusting out of a desire to see the good in others. He can also be prone to letting his insecurities regarding his physical skills and his short stature cloud his judgement. In spite of this, he is well-liked and has fought hard to earn the respect of his peers and clanmates.

Astrid Hofferson: Asphodelfang - A self-assured and talented golden-brown molly. She’s dedicated, dutiful, and extremely competitive. Her love for her clan is immense, and she commands respect for her talents and her ambition. She is ruled highly by emotion, her feelings often getting the better of her, which leads to her acting out impulsively and irrationally. Although she has begun to mellow out with age, no cat can deny that she’s still quite fiery.

Fishlegs Ingerman: Carpnose -A heavy-set and thick-furred golden-brown tom. Timid and not-too-good at fighting, he is very skilled when it comes to tracking and hunting, possessing quite the eye for detail. He’s warm and friendly to just about everybody, and is generally liked because of this. While he’s willing to fight for the clan if he must, he is usually one of the first to run when conflicts arise.

Snotlout Jorgenson: Slugclaw - A large black tom, with fur tinged red from time spent in the sun. He’s cocky and smug, and carries himself with an aura of superiority. Although he isn’t exactly bright, he’s well-versed in the art of combat, and goes into battle with all of the might and confidence of an ancient warrior hero. He’s also stubborn and confrontational, and likes to settle disputes with teeth and claws.

Ruffnut and Tuffnut: Weaselfur & Weevilfur - A dusky-brown molly and a dusky-brown tom, respectively. Two littermates, not exactly the sharpest tools in the shed, but respectable warriors. They often butt heads, but neither would know what to do without the other. Gobber the Belch: Gorseflower - A large, long-haired and battle-worn yellow tom, who is covered in scars. Stoatstar’s deputy and closest friend. A respectable warrior, he’s raised more apprentices than any cat in the clan, and is well-known for his teaching ability. He’s crass and outspoken, and more than reliable in a fight.

Valka: Kestreltail - A brown torbie molly, pretty and lithe but getting on in age. A strong, fearless warrior who is quite athletic and graceful. Although she isn’t much of a people person (cat cat?), she’s caring and devoted to those she is close to. She is Stoatstar’s mate, and Littlepelt’s mother.

Stoick the Vast: Stoatstar (Stoatclaw) -An immense, dark ginger tom, and the leader of Hooliganclan. Famed for his imposing figure and his unmatched skill in battle. While he’s a bit set in his ways, and has a tendency to be hard on his son, Littlepelt, his heart is always in the right place. Although his sense of justice, duty, and dedication to his clan would more than qualify him for the -heart suffix, it would be remiss for the clan not to recognize his unparalleled talent for fighting.

#warriorsify #submission

[theultimateegghead-blog]

Modest Media Game Reviews Ninja Gaiden

Game – Ninja Gaiden Year of Release – 1988 (JP) 1989 (US) Developer – Tecmo Publisher - Tecmo Rated – Pre-Dates ESRB Genre – Action Side scrolling Platformer Platform - Nintendo Entertainment System, TurboGrafx-16, Super Nintendo Entertainment System, Wii Virtual Console, Mobile phones, 3DS Virtual Console, Wii U Virtual Console

Ninja Gaiden is often referred to as one of the most insanely difficult games on the NES. A super challenging side-scroller platformer that has been simultaneously loved and criticized by fans and critics alike. Can a game be too hard for its own good? Lets find out.

Gameplay – To answer the previous question, yes, yes you can. This game’s difficulty is unfair and unbalanced. I am not saying its bad, but ill cover why it is unfair. First of all, enemies, they are the bane of this game. Enemies tend to spawn out of nowhere and in later levels spawn in such a way its almost impossible to avoid getting hit. This is best seen with the room before the final boss, where enemies rain from the ceiling and just try to hover over you while knocking you back and forth. Due to this game’s wonky respawn system, enemies immediately respawn when offscreen, and enemies that fly from the corner of the screen can appear infinitely. Look no further than the infamous birds for this example. Some enemy layouts are so complicated or so unfairly placed that its almost pure luck if you can escape. A good example is this one point in the final level where dozens of flying ninjas at various speeds and elevations bombard you while you platform, and due to the way enemies respawn, the bombardment never ends. Now with the negative out of the way, lets look at the positive. Level layouts are alright, straightforward and standard. Some of the games more infamous moments are only found late in the game regarding level layout. The cliffside is without a doubt the worst level. However, there are some good levels in there as well, the first level does a great job weaning you into the games style. Though it’s a rocky road from there. Some of the platforming feels stiff and Ryu lacks some mobility regarding his wall jumping, its easy to get stuck on a top of a wall and get hit, or an enemy might just decided to stand at the edge and make it a pain to progress. Ryu fights with a sword, meaning all foes must be very close to damage, various other things, like shuriken or fire balls appear in limited qualities. The extra tools can make certain parts a bit easier. Bosses in this game are a mix bag but are not overly difficult with two exceptions. The last 2 bosses, being Malth and the final boss room, are painfully difficult. Most of their moves seem unavoidable and losing to them means replaying some of the hardest levels in the game! I cannot give this game a very high score in this department, its not bad, but it is to frustrating and hard to be enjoyable. Please note that I did beat the game, so I’m not just moaning over not being able to beat it. Score – 12/20

Graphics – Pretty good. Each level has a color scheme that, while not realistic, is a constant. Ryu and the enemies don’t clash with the background, so you will see enemies on the screen along with interactable torches that could be hit for points, health or weapons. There are many enemy types, and the game can handle a lot of character movement at once. The cutscenes between levels look great for their time and are inspired by anime from the 80s. While some levels can feel dull or look boring, the games overall graphical presentation is up to par. Score – 8/10

Story – For a game from the 80s, where story was usually locked in the pages of a manual, Ninja Gaiden does tell a story. While this story, if told nowadays might better fit a cartoon than a game made to be taken seriously, it works really well. Ryu’s father is supposedly killed in combat, and Ryu, armed with the dragon sword seeks revenge. Ryu is hunted by the CIA, whom try to force him to help overthrow a cult trying to revive a demon. There is a romantic subplot…kind of. There is a plot point about Ryu’s father and of course there is the evil demon and the cult leader revealing his evil plans. Overall the plot is nothing special and again by today standards, it would be considered cliché. This was the 80s though, so this could be one of the most enticing game stories of the time. Couple this with the aforementioned cutscenes and you have a good solid plot. The game also leaves room for a sequel as well, but that’s a review for another day. Score – 7/10

Replay Ability – Low, there are no secrets in this game nor any elements in the game that are introduced in a subsequent playthrough. While some people speed run or try for high scores, the general audience might try it and put it down. Unless it is for nostalgia reasons of course. Given this games brutal nature, I think one playthrough will suffice all but the hardcore Ninja Gaiden fans. On the plus side, it is short enough to not eat up a day…if the player in question is good at it. Score – 2/5

Music – Pretty good! The majority of the ost is somewhat techno and upbeat. The music compounds the gameplay by being fast paced and organized yet hectic as well. Even though there is not much diversity in music, each level has its own theme. While it may sound repetitive in some cases, it is enjoyable nonetheless. Sound effects are alright, the main sound effects you will be hearing is the sound of the sword swinging and the sound of an item being picked up. I would recommend giving the ost a listen to. Score – 4/5

Overall – This game is hard, so hard that it negatively impacts the quality of presentation. While this game shines in other forms of presentation, it is the fundamental gameplay that undoes it all. There is a difference between fair and balanced hard and unfair hard. Unfortunately, a lot of old school hard games had this more unfair spike to it. Now, I think this game is flawed, yes, but its not that bad. It is frustrating but competent with level design for the most part. If you are looking for a hardcore challenge, then this is a game worth trying, but if you want a genuine tough but manageable old school Nintendo game, look elsewhere. Final score – 6.6/10 – so - so

#Modest Media Review #game #video games #game reviews #nintendo #nes #famicon #tecmo #1988 #1989 #virtual console #wii #wii u #ds #ninja gaiden #ninja

[tech-specialist98]

Poco X3 Pro review: More power to you

📷

📷📷 Poco X3Poco hasn’t been around for long and yet very quickly this Xiaomi spinoff brand has built a reputation for itself launching multiple products with “world’s first or India’s first” technologies. Starting off with the illustrious Poco F1, it went on to launch the Poco X2 (first phone under 20k with 120Hz refresh rate display) and Poco X3 (first phone with Qualcomm Snapdragon 732G system-on-chip). The freshly minted Poco X3 Pro, likewise, is the first phone with Qualcomm Snapdragon 860 SoC. More than the chip itself, it is the price of the phone that is grabbing headlines. It starts at just Rs 18,999 (6GB/128GB).Then again, if you know a thing or two about Poco, this is business as usual.Unlike the Poco F1 or Poco X2 or even the Poco X3, the Poco X3 Pro isn’t technically a new product so to say. As the name suggests, it’s a turbo-charged Poco X3. If the Poco X3 was a race car, the Poco X3 Pro with its more powerful hardware should be a rocket ship. That’s expected. But that’s not all that you probably expect from a phone launching in 2021, even if its costs so low. You also expect a little bit of polish and a little bit of promise of futureproofing to go along.High performance, delivered Like the phone itself, the chip inside it is also not completely brand new. The Snapdragon 860 is a Snapdragon 855 from 2019 with a slightly overclocked CPU. Think of it as a refurbished Snapdragon 855 Plus. Considering how fast Qualcomm keeps refreshing its portfolio these days, some might take that refurbished badge with a pinch of salt. Some might call it dated. But when you put a chip like that inside a budget phone like the Poco X3 Pro, all your preconceived notions are instantly blown away. Suddenly, things start to make a lot of sense.Make no mistake, this is the most powerful phone under 20k in the Indian market today. Period. As if it wasn’t already enough, the Poco X3 Pro also comes with UFS 3.1 storage, another first for any phone in this price range.The Poco X3 Pro story essentially revolves around this hardware combo. It is perhaps the only Poco phone worthy of being called a “spiritual” successor to the Poco F1, perfectly aligning with its “everything you need, nothing you don’t” formula which is probably why the brand is going all out on marketing it that way. For good reason. Next to the Poco X3, the Poco X3 Pro is a whole new beast. Like I said, it’s a rocket ship.And it performs like one, for the most part. There are two parts to this story.This is the only phone under 20k that can play a graphically intensive game like Genshin Impact (at medium setting) or Call of Duty: Mobile (all maxed out) effortlessly, which is to say that your experience would be very, very satisfying. The Adreno 640 GPU holds up well. Though it throttles from time to time, this phone latches on and gives you a steady 60fps in many supporting games. Something like this was not possible before. It opens new opportunities, the Poco X3 Pro, for those looking to get some sort of headstart into the world of competitive gaming without breaking their bank. But it is not perfect. The Snapdragon 860, like the Snapdragon 870, and even the Snapdragon 888, is prone to heating, sometimes alarmingly when stressed. There is a cooling system inside the phone — called Liquid Cool Plus — but it seems lifted as is from the Poco X3, a phone that came with a far less powerful chip in comparison. Whatever it is, it can’t hold the beast for long as the Poco X3 Pro gets warm quickly, and near toasty during extended gaming sessions. At this point, it can become uncomfortable to hold.Basic day-to-day tasks are handled well by the phone though. As an everybody phone, this is as slick as it can get at such a low price. Poco gives you an option for up to 8 gigs of LPDDR4X RAM. Storage is capped at 128GB, but the phone supports expansion by up to 1TB. This is via a hybrid slot.Beyond gaming Rest of the Poco X3 Pro is familiar territory. Be it design, display, or battery. Even the cameras. That is not to say there are no changes, but those changes have got more to

do with subtle refinements than anything else. Some choices work, some not so much but you can tell Poco has tried to add a bit of polish to the whole package. The Poco X3 was rough around the edges.This starts with the design itself. The dual tone look is being carried over, which is to say that the Poco X3 Pro — like its predecessor — is also unapologetically bold and flashy. There is a new bronze colourway if you’re into that sort of thing. The pill-shaped massive camera module stays put too. So does the recessed side-mounted fingerprint reader which is, expectedly, fast and responsive. The only change here is the slightly tweaked Poco branding that’s more “3D” than before, but still difficult to unsee — and in my case, difficult to get along with.One of the big concerns with the Poco X3 was its heft. It was big and bulky. A part of this was because of its huge 6,000mAh battery. Poco has tried to address those concerns by reducing capacity — the Poco X3 Pro has a smaller 5,160mAh battery — but the results are nothing to write home about. The Poco X3 Pro is still an all-plastic phone that’s almost 215 gram in weight and nearly 9.5mm in thickness. Not to mention, that watered-down battery means the Poco X3 Pro can’t last as long as the Poco X3 (battery life on average is good though). It’s one of those rare instances where Poco has backed itself into a corner.It’s barely touched that screen though aside from bumping up the protection which is Corning Gorilla Glass 6 now. The Poco X3 Pro has the same 6.67-inch IPS LCD display with 1080p resolution and dynamic 120Hz refresh rate (240Hz touch sampling) as the Poco X3. It works in the same way also which means it is good but not best in class. The panel does not get very bright, colours appear muted and viewing angles could be better. The phone can’t play HDR10 content off streaming services like Netflix despite support. Ghosting or random stutters are common across some UI elements from time to time or when you are browsing through a page that involves diverse elements like text, images/GIFs, or videos. Next to a phone like the Redmi Note 10 Pro Max, or Note 10 Pro, the Poco X3 Pro looks seriously underpowered in this regardThese Redmi phones also give the Poco X3 Pro’s cameras a run for their money. The Poco X3, even though it was a performance-oriented slash gaming phone, had a competitive camera setup. For some curious reason, its “Pro” version takes several steps back. It has a 48MP main (this was 64MP in the X3), 8MP ultra-wide-angle (13MP in X3) and two 2MP cameras, one for depth and another for macros. Output is just about serviceable.You can take good-enough shots with the primary camera (Sony IMX582 sensor) when lots of light is available, but the level of detail and dynamic range could be better. Colours are mostly true to source, which is nice. The ultra-wide camera lacks colour parity with the main camera, but it does a decent job offering a wider perspective when lighting is ideal. Details are still amiss in these photos, but it is what it is. Portraits shot with the Poco X3 Pro come out nice with good subject separation and creamy background blur. The macro shooter is a hit or miss affair. Low light photos (even with night mode which is also available on the ultra-wide) are disappointing, in part due to the aggressive noise reduction algorithm. Video recording tops out at 4K@30fps. The 20MP front camera is same as the one on the Poco X3. It takes decent selfies when lighting is good with occasional smoothening even when beautification is manually set to off.Software has always been Poco’s dark horse and while that’s largely true about the Poco X3 Pro as well, MIUI for Poco is clearly showing signs of ageing, already. It does not show any pesky ads like its other Redmi siblings which is well articulated and appreciated, but Poco needs to do more than that to justify its existence as an independent brand now. MIUI for Poco needs to be more than just MIUI with a Poco launcher to differentiate itself. With Xiaomi borrowing many of its features including the

hallowed app drawer and Google feed on the minus one screen, MIUI for Poco doesn’t really stand out anymore. If anything, it has become buggier by the day. The amount of bloat or unwanted apps has gone up. But the biggest problem is the lack of clarity on future updates. My review unit is running MIUI 12.0.5 (with the April security patch) when an even cheaper Redmi phone like the Redmi Note 10S has been updated to MIUI 12.5.4.An ode to a classic I write this review as I install Battlegrounds Mobile India Beta on this phone, and I can’t help but think how far Poco has come. How the Poco F1 turned the industry literally upside down. That phone was far from perfect. It had a wonky design and terrible cameras. The thing couldn’t even stream Netflix in high definition initially. And yet, here we are, three years later, still asking Poco to launch a successor. Not a lot of phones have commanded so much respect and adulation from fans and critics alike. It was truly one of its kind, the Poco F1, and I think it’s befitting it stays that way. Some things are just not meant to be replacedBut you can always have a product or two that could take you back in time. Something like the Poco X3 Pro. It is the only phone that has been able to recreate some of that lost Poco F1 magic for me.There are phones with better design, more colourful display, significantly better cameras, and longer battery life under 20k, but none of them can play Battlegrounds Mobile India Beta the way it is meant to be played like the Poco X3 Pro. If that is what you are looking for, the Poco X3 Pro comes highly recommended.But here’s the thing, nostalgia and power will take Poco only so far. Considering how a lot of people are still holding on to their Poco F1s, it would have been nice had Poco offered a 5G option (it’s possible since the Snapdragon 860 is compatible with an external X50 5G modem) even if it came at a cost.Pros: Most powerful phone under 20k, 120Hz display, Loud dual speakers, IP53 rating, Good battery lifeCons: Big and bulky, Cameras could be better, Slow Android update rollout

[welldresseddadblog]

Mid May it was time to visit the sceptred Isles of Great Britain for another getaway mini-break. Learning from previous experiences regarding the absolute density of experiences in the UK, we planned less travel and more local exploring this time. This also means spending less valuable time moving from overnight accommodation to new overnight accommodation, which again helps to avoid energy loss. This time it was more South Western areas that would be in focus, as in Glastonbury and the surrounding areas. This post will contain marginal coverage of menswear, but may be useful for travel tips! We’ve previously visited Bath and Bristol, which weren’t as great.

A word to start off with though, about getting around in the UK. There really is no substitute for renting a car. I’d love to say “take the train, take buses, they’re great! Cycle! Walk!”, but as far as I can tell it’s a mess of companies, a mess of pricing, and unless you’ve got oceans of time to spend travelling and waiting, it’s going to eat a chunk of your valuable holiday time. So, much as I hate to promote more travel by car, it really does make sense to travel by car. And car rental is surprisingly reasonable these days. I’ll offer up another observation: A lot of the roads in the UK were made a long time ago, before cars, or when cars were much smaller than today. This can be a challenge, in some cases quite terrifying, as you’re heading down a super-narrow road, hedges along the sides and trees growing overhead, and local motorsport heroes barreling towards you in a road space that seems frighteningly narrow. If you know you’re going to be travelling the small roads, get something small. This time there were three of us with luggage, and a lot of modern roads, so we treated ourselves to a larger than usual vehicle, a Vauxhall Grandland. A mini-SUV of sorts, I guess, but practical, comfortable and space for suitcases.

Stock up on water before a long day!

Google Maps is a must for serious driving. A removable holder is a boon.

Posing with an appropriate Stonehenge mug.

Flying into Gatwick late in the evening means less traffic about, which is helpful when readjusting from driving on the right-hand side to the left-hand side, getting the navigation working properly and finding the way to the destination. Rental cars should come with a lit up sign on the rear saying “I’ve just arrived, be gentle”, to warn aggressive locals wanting to get home as fast as possible that the driver ahead is going as fast as feels sane and safe!

At this point I’ll give you another premium travel tip: If you’ve booked an Airbnb, make sure to check that the address is complete and can be found in Google Maps. Not checking this can mean that you arrive in the general area, late at night, with no way of finding out where you’re staying. If you’re in more sparsely populated areas, mobile coverage may also be dodgy. And late at night means people are asleep, it’s very dark, house numbers can be impossible to see and you start wondering if it’s possible to sleep in the car. Yes, this happens. Luckily we found cell coverage, managed to Google up a photo of the frontage online, and found the right place. Oh, and I’d recommend you stick to the AirBnB’s run by “Superhosts” to avoid surprises. Airbnb has made it easy for everyone to allow strangers to stay in their home, which is a fine and dandy idea, but people are different, homes are different, and standards are widely different.

The grounds of Guildford castle.

Remains of Guildford castle.

Guildford was the nearest town and although we’d heard much about it before, we decided to head there. A quick Google showed there was a Park & Ride scheme, so we parked and took a bus to the town centre. A pleasant surprise really, as it proved to be a proper little town, in a sort of old-fashioned way, as there were plenty of shops, no obvious empty spaces, no noticeable vape shops and no huge shopping centre. Plenty of old buildings as well, and even a castle with excellent grounds, and no charge to walk around. I tend to stop by any charity shop that looks promising, as it’s one of the few ways for modern man to legitimately treasure hunt.

A peaceful demonstration for a free Stonehenge.

Obligatory Stonehenge photo.

Can’t fail to see they have a point.

Stonehenge is an odd place. A global icon, a pile of big rocks, a place of alternative worship, and now a genuine five-star tourist trap. We arrived by road alongside it, which means traffic slows to a halt for everyone to get the freebie look from their cars. Once you arrive at the new visitors’ centre though you’ve last all sight of the stones, as the visitors’ centre is a solid mile away. Which a cynical soul might suggest is to make more people pay the entrance fee, which includes a shuttle bus to the site. And therein lies a point, as the Stonehenge site itself is free to visit, but if you want the “official version” it’s very expensive (to the tune of 50 pounds for two adults and a child). To be blunt, to get closer to something you’ve already seen a million times on photos isn’t as big a deal as it’s cracked up to be. It’s kind of, just exactly what you expect. And a fancy visitors centre with a huge well-stocked gift shop doesn’t really make it a bigger deal (that said though, the Stonehenge X Barbour jackets they sold there weren’t bad if a very unlikely collaboration). The toilets are free though, which is handy. Check out here for more info about Free Stonehenge and how to visit Stonehenge for free.

  Kind of meagre selection and even more meagre discount offer, not very impressed, Trickers at Kilver Court!

  With the rapidly rising popularity of outlet villages, we thought we’d check in on a couple. Kilver Court in Shepton Mallet has a few interesting brands and as it was en-route we went by. Compared to most newer outlet-places it’s on the smaller side, with a limited number of brands, and sadly it proved not very worth the stop. At least for a professional menswearist. The menswear brands all har marginal presences and feeble discounts, not at all in the original and true spirit of outlets, but more in line with newer thinking of “everyone loves an outlet, let’s bung some stuff there and hope people are blinded enough by the discount idea that they’ll grab some of our stuff as well”. The Trickers shoe section was basically a table of shoes, so definitely not worth a visit. A waste of time really, though WDW did enjoy the Toast section (which used to have some good menswear as well, though sadly no longer).

    Glastonbury proved an absolute delight though. I’d heard it was a bit of a freewheeling place, with more Wicca and healing power shops than you can shake a wand at, and this wasn’t far off the mark. There was a relaxed and pleasant feel to the town though, so just going walkabout was nice. Plenty of hippies, street musicians and curiosa. Our Airbnb hos had kindly pointed us towards some recommended hostelries and these proved to be solid tips. If you’re heading that way, we found excellent food and drink at The Who’d A Thought It and Hundred Monkeys. Naturally, being in Somerset, proper cider country, it was great to be able to sample some top ciders straight from the barrel.

I’m not sure where I saw this, but no doubt it was Glastonbury appropriate!

Glastonbury had some nice street-art on offer.

Probably the most refreshing glass of cider I enjoyed all week.

  Thinking back, we did want to see the Glastonbury Abbey. As we often find these days though, there’s an entrance fee. And a cheeky one at that. If you’re travelling around seeing various places, usually several in a day, it’s just not on to request 21 pounds entrance for a family of two adults and a child. We want a quick peek around, not to stay the night. So a  sneaky peek in through the cracks in the gate or over the top of the wall will do. I find it much more palatable when entrance is free and there’s a voluntary donation box.

Panoramic photo of the view from Glastonbury Tor.

We did walk up to Glastonbury Tor though, a nice and not too taxing walk in the sunshine. As legend has it, the Isle of Avalon and the burial site of King Arthur (apparently a legend himself). The view from the top is stunning, you can see for miles and miles in all directions. Remarkably English Heritage has yet to find a way to charge tickets, so the entire experience is free, which only makes it better. On the way down we stopped by the Chalice Well, which proved yet another rip-off venture at 11 pounds for three. It’s not as if there’s anything to see there. Oh, ok, if you do believe that it’s a holy well and that the reddish well water is the blood of Christ after the chalice was cast into it. A simple chemical analysis shows the colour and taste is due to the high iron content though, so you have to be something of a believer to buy into the pitch. Granted, it’s not unpleasant to sit in the gardens and slow down for a moment, but at the end of the day, it’s a small park. We did hear mention of the bathhouse is open during the daytime and a popular haunt for skinny-dipping hippies. For the specially interested, I imagine.

Walking down from Glastonbry Tor.

My travelling companions for the week.

After the touristy trappings of Stonehenge, Avebury was something quite different. Much more like the holidays of my childhood really, with a careless pub lunch, a wonky icecream, lots of people milling around, noisy motorbikes and so forth. Again the parking was totally overpriced, though you could park there all day on the ticket (seriously though, Avebury is not a day’s worth of attraction, though you can pass your ticket on to someone else for a small bump in karma). The famous standing stones were there though, and available to touch, hug or take a selfie against. Not as iconic and well known as the ‘henge, but definitely a friendlier experience all around. And if you like your large, historic, mysterious, probably manmade bumps of ground, there’s also Silbury Hill nearby. It pays to read up a bit though, as the historical importance of the sites isn’t immediately obvious from what you can actually see.

Avebury offers unrestriced access to vertically aligned ancient stones.

The village of Avebury is situated inside the circle of stones.

The day after we noticed that the Clarks Outlet Village was also very close by, so we drove by there to take a look before engaging in more historical pursuits. Again, it’s the typical modern “outlet village”, which while it has a village-layout is really just a shopping mall by any other name. Its main characteristics are a poor selection of goods, goods produced to be “outlet products” and brands that really don’t belong there at all, and the whole bargain aspect of it is mainly in the advertising. The Clarks shop itself was large and well stocked, but the Clarks Originals section was more frustrating than anything unless you happened to have size 13 feet. No need to return here. To be honest, I’m not sure what I’m expecting at an Outlet place, though there used to be a lot of actual bargains on the previous season and odd stuff.

A very large Clarks shoe.

Another very large Clarks shoe.

I realise I’m sounding like an absolute grump. Full on Victor Meldrew. “Can you believe the price of admission?”. It’s so easy to focus on all that is disappointing and terrible, instead of seeing the positive sides of a trip. So to balance things out, I will make a point of mentioning that we had absolutely stunning weather the entire week (cynical voices are no doubt wondering if English Heritage has found a way to charge for this), the places we stayed were better or much better than expected, the rental Vauxhall Grandland was a good choice, comfortable and spacious and traffic was mostly blessedly light. And we had some great food and cider.

To add a little final interest to the garmsman, I can reveal that I mostly wore a pair of blue khaki trousers from Trickett, sneakers from Crown Northampton and a few white t-shirts. Functional and fine, perfect for a short holiday.

In summary, I’d very much recommend visiting Glastonbury and the Somerset area!

Trip report: Glastonbury and the South-West #cider #rant #englishheritage #stonehenge #entryfee #yikes #visitbritain #glastonbury #somerset #pie #avebury #guildford #ancient #historical #standingstones Mid May it was time to visit the sceptred Isles of Great Britain for another getaway mini-break.

#cider #driving #Glastonbury #outlet village #rant #Somerset #trip report #UK #Vauxhall

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Marcella Season 3 Ending Explained: Murders, Money and the Mystery Caller

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Warning: contains major spoilers for Marcella season 3 episodes 1-8, available to stream now on ITV Hub.

From London working mum to Belfast gangster’s moll to international multi-millionaire in just three seasons. That’s some trajectory. Other TV detectives must look at Marcella Backland and ask, where’s my new alias and private plane? 

It’s not coming, Sarge, because unlike Marcella, your show insists on complying with the merest demands of naturalism and coherence. You plod on drearily in an approximation of the real world while Marcella does screaming naked cartwheels through story, Etch-a-Sketch erasing bits of plot, and leaping gazelle-like from one improbable thing to the next. Other crime dramas didn’t realise that untethering entirely from sense was an option. 

Marcella realised, and the result is season three – a take on mental illness so clumsy it’ll have you reappraising the subtle qualities of some bricks. What happens, the new run asked, when you take a detective with dissociative identity disorder and make her take on a new identity for work? She’ll go nutso, right?! Right. 

Add that to an already-irresponsible storyline about Sudden Infant Death Syndrome, throw in a compulsive hand-washer reading F. Scott Fitzgerald’s Tender is the Night, and you’re ready to call house on a full bingo card of mental illness cliché.

If Anna Friel wasn’t so good at her job, Marcella would be unwatchable. Her thoroughgoing commitment to this creaky fairground ride of a crime drama makes it unusually compelling. You watch it like you might watch an increasingly loud drunk on another table in the pub: just to see what it’ll do next.  

It might do a fourth season next, though one hasn’t yet been announced. The season three ending left things open for a fourth go around for our unstable lead – now with millions in stolen gangster cash, an orphaned baby and a new fringe. Should one be required, the wonky stage is set for the return of DS Backland/Keira Devlin/Miss Hart. If Marcella doesn’t return, then that bloodbath of a finale and its mysterious coda was our last goodbye. 

The Mystery Caller

The season’s final shot showed an unanswered cordless phone ringing off on the table of a bar at a private airport in an unknown country. Now going by new alias “Miss Hart”, our lead had taken the call and then hung up on it when a voice asked for Marcella Backland. Who was calling? A cop? DI Rav Sangha? Marcella herself, putting on a voice? (As likely as anything with this show.) 

To judge by the age of baby Katy, some time had passed since the death of the Maguire siblings and the airport scene. Last we’d seen Marcella, she was driving away from the Maguire mansion with baby Katy, having belatedly called for back-up and reported multiple fatalities and an officer (DI Rav) down. Those fatalities in full: Stacey Barratt (nee Maguire), shot dead by her brother Finn; Rory Maguire, shot dead by his sister Stacey in revenge for ordering the murder of her husband Bobby Barrett; Finn Maguire, shot dead by Marcella Backland in her undercover guise as Keira Devlin; Jack Healy, stabbed by Frank Young; and Frank Young, shot by Jack Healy. 

Is Rav dead?

Also seriously wounded in the Maguire bloodbath was DI Rav Sangha, who’d come to Belfast to investigate Bobby Barrett for the murder of the son of the UK Foreign Secretary, when he stumbled across Frank and Marcella’s undercover operation targeting the Maguires. Finn Maguire shot Rav, Marcella shot Finn, and then – as we’d seen in a flash-forward episode earlier – she stood over his bleeding body and said “I told you to walk away”. Did Rav die? 

Perhaps, but if you look again at the montage of corpses shown later in the finale, every single dead body is shown apart from Rav’s, which indicates that he might have made it.

The Maguires’ Millions

Before driving off with baby Katy, Marcella took a knife to the corpse of Rory Maguire and cut out one of his eyes. She used it to get past the retinal scan security on his private laptop so that she could transfer the balance of the Maguire family’s ill-gotten funds to another account, over 24 million in sterling. Showing Katherine Maguire – who was unable to move or speak due to a stroke – what she was doing, Marcella drained the account, saying the money was for Katy and it’s what her mother Stacey would have wanted. 

What happened to Katherine Maguire?

Presumably she was found when the police responded to Marcella’s call for back-up. Due to her second stroke, Katherine was unable to speak or move, so would have had a hard time telling the police that Marcella had kidnapped her grandchild. It wouldn’t have been impossible though.

Was Frank really running an undercover unit?

If he was, some serious questions about probity would have had to be raised at his next annual appraisal. When Frank Young approached Marcella at the end of season two, he told her that he worked in a department with season one character DCI Laura Porter, played by Nina Sosanya. They could use a dead police officer to go undercover, he told our lead. The undercover training we saw Frank subject Marcella to in episode six though, had nothing official about it. He used highly dubious methods to encourage a vulnerable, unstable woman to lose her real self in a fictitious persona, and then exploited her to carry out a personal revenge plan.

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Frank did seem to have access to official police systems, which suggests he was acting in a police capacity. When Marcella sent him the addresses and phone numbers found in the belongings of the dead Vietnamese people-trafficking victims, those addresses were duly raided by the police. There was also an official record of his undercover operation against the Maguires, as stumbled upon by DI Rav Sangha during his investigation of the Bobby Barrett murder case. Frank also had entry to a police computer system where he faked the existence of disgraced cop DS Keira Devlin, later seen by Rory Maguire. 

On that same computer system, Marcella discovered that Frank was lying about his wife and daughter living halfway across the world.

What happened to Frank’s wife and daughter? 

They were killed in a Belfast restaurant that was firebombed in 2010 by the Maguires as part of a turf war with rival gang the Callaghans. Frank also would have been killed if he’d arrived at the restaurant on time. He set up the undercover operation and put Marcella in place to get revenge on the Maguire family. At the end of episode two, when Frank was seen talking to a mystery companion on a bench about the operation, we can assume he was talking to his dead wife Sally. A scene later in the season showed him in the fire-blackened restaurant, drinking and ‘talking’ to Sally about his plan. 

Who was tormenting Keira?

Marcella, aka her dormant personality. When ‘Marcella’ was running the show, Keira left Juliet’s baby mobile sheet music under her windscreen wiper, put the news clipping in the museum locker and sent her self the key (to locker ‘B4’ incidentally… or maybe ‘before’) and made the dummy with the picture of Keira’s face stuck to it, with a plastic bag over its head in mimicry of the season one murderer MO. By the end, when Marcella had retaken control, ‘Keira’ promised she would always be there to help her cope with her pain. 

Is Marcella wanted for murder?

She fatally shot Finn, but the only witness to that is DI Rav Sangha, who may or may not be dead himself. If Rav survives, is he likely to rat out Marcella for offing such a monstrous ballbag as Finn Maguire? Shouldn’t have thought so. 

Where did Marcella take baby Katy? 

Your guess is as good as mine. A tattoo remover, perhaps? Before he was abducted, Bobby Barrett was supposed to be going to a new life in Havana, Cuba (where he hoped to meet Fidel Castro, who died in 2016. Never the sharpest tool in the box, Bobby.)

Was it all a dream?

Go back through the season, and you’ll see that almost every episode opens with a close-up of Marcella’s eyes opening as she wakes up, hence: all a dream? It would explain a lot, including any unanswered questions viewers might have about that tattoo, the flip-flopping hair colour, why Keira crashed her Mini Countryman, exactly when she and Finn “I’ve missed this” Maguire started sleeping together, why Jack instantly forgot about his dead daughter, what happened with the drugged mayor and the dead journalist, where Keira got Danny’s toy gun, what the spaceman curtains at the safe house were all about, where Rav got a hotel room’s worth of Marcella and Jason’s family photos, where DCI Laura Porter actually was… all that and much more.

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All episodes of Marcella season 3 are available to stream on ITV Hub in the UK and Netflix in the US.

The post Marcella Season 3 Ending Explained: Murders, Money and the Mystery Caller appeared first on Den of Geek.

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Anker Nebula Solar Portable projector: More white dwarf than supernova

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Anker Nebula Solar Portable projector: More white dwarf than supernova

The Anker Nebula Solar Portable is a 1080p projector with a built-in battery and Android TV. It’s a complete package that lets you enjoy movies and TV with a huge image just about anywhere. You can even use it as a Bluetooth speaker. If this sounds vaguely familiar, it’s because it’s similar to another Nebula projector, the Mars II Pro, which we reviewed a few months ago. The Mars II Pro is our favorite portable projector overall and while the Solar has its (ahem) bright spots, it’s just not as good.

Like

Sleek, compact design

1080p resolution

Built-in battery lasts 3 hours

Don’t Like

Fairly dim

Mediocre contrast

Android TV is wonky

On paper, the Solar Portable addresses two of the issues we had with the Mars II Pro: resolution and its app store. The II Pro is only 720p, and uses a “curated” Google experience called Aptoide. Unfortunately, fixing those two problems comes with decreased light output. No projector this size is particularly bright, but the Solar is about 40% dimmer than the Mars II. Android TV beats Aptoide, but it still has some quirks that mean you might be better off attaching a streaming stick anyway. Yes, that flat design is unique, but Anker’s own Mars II Pro is a better choice.

Little Anker Nebula Solar Portable projector, big pictures

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Basic specs

Native resolution: 1,920×1,080 pixels

HDR-compatible: Yes

4K-compatible: Yes

3D-compatible: No

Lumens spec: 400 ANSI

Zoom: No

Lens shift: No

Lamp life (Normal mode): 30,000 hours

The Solar accepts HDR10, but is not HDR. It accepts 4K, but is not a 4K projector. Since this projector is incapable of actually displaying these higher-resolution and high-dynamic-range signals, their inclusion seems more like something to beef up a features list on a website than anything else.

There’s no lens shift or zoom on the Solar, but neither is expected in this price range. There’s autofocus, however, which works pretty well. A pivoting foot on the bottom tilts the front of the projector upward for a bit more flexibility in placement.

There’s a claimed three hours of life from the 20,000-mAh battery. This is a bit odd since the brighter Mars II Pro has a smaller battery and yet the same amount of play time.

Speaking of brightness, Anker claims 400 lumens. I measured about half that. The Mars II Pro had a claimed 500, and I measured over 300. No projector in this size and price range is very bright, but side by side the Mars II Pro’s picture looks significantly brighter, which allows it to look better on bigger screens.

You can use the Solar as a Bluetooth speaker. The two 3-watt speakers sound pretty good, which is always a bonus in a portable projector. They’re not as loud as the Mars II Pro’s dual 10-watters, however.

If you want to download some content to watch offline, there’s 8GB storage.

Geoffrey Morrison/CNET

Connectivity and convenience

HDMI inputs: 1

PC input: No

USB ports: 2

Audio input and output: No

Digital audio output: No

Wi-Fi: 802.11a, b, g, n, ac

12-volt trigger: No

RS-232 remote port: No

MHL: No

Remote: Not backlit

The Solar’s HDMI input is capable of accepting HDR and 4K, but since the projector is neither, this is a six-line highway connecting two small towns with no cars.

The USB-C connection is for charging, and included with the Solar is a fast-charger you could use for your phone or tablet when you’re not using or charging the projector. The other USB connection can accept files or charge a streaming stick. The power rating isn’t specified, but I was able to get a streaming stick running on it, so it should be enough.

I like the Android TV app store but unfortunately some apps, like Vudu, would only send the standard-definition versions of their content. This is disappointing, to say the least. It makes the resolution of the projector less relevant. Others, like Disney Plus, Amazon Prime Video and Hulu looked fine, however. 

Then there’s Netflix, which requires several steps to get installed on the Solar. You need to install the Nebula Manager app, which then allows you to download the mobile version of the Netflix app. To watch Netflix after you install it, you need to go to the Manager app and then Netflix. Which, even after all those steps, looks exceptionally soft. Because it’s the mobile version, it also means it’s not designed to work with a traditional remote, so you need to use the Nebula Connect app on your phone to navigate. 

These issues spoil the goodness of built-in Android TV to a certain extent, but as I mentioned an easy solution is attaching an external streamer. 

Geoffrey Morrison/CNET

Picture quality comparisons

The Mars II Pro and the PH30N are both direct competitors to the Solar. To compare the three I ended up using a mix of internal apps, external streaming sticks and a Monoprice 1×4 distribution amplifier due to the different resolutions of the projectors, and the fact that the Solar accepts 4K (and for some frustrating reason that became the default when connected to the Monoprice). I viewed everything on a 102-inch 1.0-gain screen.

The most obvious difference was light output. The Mars II Pro was easily the brightest, followed by the Solar and the LG. Brightness is not the only important factor in a projector’s image quality but it’s a huge part. Not only does it determine how compelling the image is overall, but it also determines how large an image you can create that’s still watchable. This is one of the reasons I liked the Mars II Pro: It’s very bright for its size and price. The Solar’s picture looks dim in comparison, and the LG’s is the dimmest of the three. 

Geoffrey Morrison/CNET

Contrast ratio is poor across the board compared with something like the BenQ HT2050, but that’s par for the course. No inexpensive projector has a good contrast ratio. The Solar is technically better than the Mars II here, at 407:1 compared with 354:1, but that’s too close to see even side by side and is barely outside the range of normal measurement error. This low contrast ratio is fine on the Mars II, as it’s relatively bright, but on the Solar it means the image is flat. Not fully washed out, but it doesn’t impress either. The LG is lower still, but again, it’s all in the same ballpark.

With the added distraction of its undefeatable soap opera effect, I put the LG aside and concentrated on the two Ankers.

Fan noise on the Solar is far quieter than the Mars II, which is welcome when you’re sitting close.

While I welcome the switch to Android TV over the troublesome Aptoide store, there’s a glaring issue: HD. With some apps the content you get is SD-only. So what then is the point of the Solar’s 1080p resolution? This could be an Android/Google issue, but it doesn’t really matter where the problem is, the result is that the easiest way to get content on the projector means taking a hit in picture quality. 

Using an external streaming stick the extra detail is apparent. After you turn down the sharpness control, that is, which is set extremely high out of the box (as usual, massive amounts of edge enhancement mask actual detail). Now it’s the Mars II Pro’s turn to look soft, lacking fine detail on things like hair and beards. However, the Solar’s greater resolution, even when configured correctly, is not enough to win out over the Mars II Pro’s better brightness.

Geoffrey Morrison/CNET

Conclusion

The adage goes “Two steps forward, one step back.” In this case, it’s more like two steps forward, two slightly smaller steps back. With their huge images, projectors certainly see a big benefit from greater resolution, so the Solar’s 1080p should be an obvious improvement over the Mars II Pro’s 720p. But with SD internal apps, that improvement is negated. Worse, the lower brightness means its image is far less compelling. The bigger battery seems good on paper, but claimed viewing time is roughly the same. Even the Solar’s speakers are less powerful.

All that, combined with a higher MSRP, and I’m not sure what the Solar has to offer over the Mars II Pro. That projector is a little gem, and the Solar is left to play catch-up.