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pizzaqueen · 8 months

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Pre-Buckingham and pre-Steddie / 474 words / a teensy bit angsty? And more of a scene than a ficlet, sorry! It could definitely be the start of something

The four of them—Chrissy, Eddie, Steve and Robin—are hanging out in Eddie’s trailer. Chrissy is pretty much living there, now, which her mom is not happy about (she won’t let Chrissy see her little brother, but they’ve managed a few sneak visits) but it’s so much better than living at home.

She’s flipping through a magazine and there’s an article on the Brat pack, so she says, “Who do you think is hotter,” holding up the magazine, “Judd Nelson or Andrew McCarthy?”

It’s Robin she’s asking and who she’s expecting to answer—she just wants to know more about her, because Robin is so cool and she likes old movies Chrissy’s never heard of and some that she has and loves too, and she wears black nail polish, and cuts her hair short, and Chrissy always wants to be around her—but Robin only goes a little pink, staring at her open-mouthed.

But, before Chrissy can figure out why, Steve and Eddie both answer at the same time: “Judd Nelson” (Steve) and “Andrew McCarthy” (Eddie).

Robin’s mouth snaps shut; Chrissy blinks.

And… She’s kind of wondered about Eddie. Not consciously, maybe, but he never talks about girls, and she thought maybe he was just being a gentleman, or whatever. But maybe… No. Maybe he’s just goofing off. But she looks at him and, oh, he wasn’t goofing off.

He’s not looking at her, though. He’s looking at Steve. And Steve is looking back at Eddie. Both of them like deer caught in the headlights.

(But Steve… Chrissy knows Steve likes girls so… She’s confused. She doesn’t get what’s happening, but something is.)

“I think they’re both cute,” Chrissy says.

It breaks the spell and Steve says, “I meant Ally Sheedy,” and Eddie looks away, shoulders slumping.

Robin makes a noise and Chrissy is confused.

She just wanted to know Robin better and now everything feels strange and awkward.

And maybe there’s something there—in what Steve said, in the way he and Eddie looked at each other, they way they look at each other—but Chrissy can’t quite grasp it yet.

(Just like she can’t grasp the way her breath catches when Robin looks at her sometimes or how her heart beats faster when they’re together.)

She looks back to the magazine, flipping through a few more pages, but her mind is still buzzing and everyone is too quiet. She racks her brain for something to say, then spies the newspaper, sitting opened to the movie section.

“Some Kind of Wonderful starts this week,” she blurts out, “anyone want to go?”

“Sure,” Robin says.

Steve nods. “Yeah.”

Eddie shrugs. Doesn’t say anything.

“Great,” Chrissy says, “I’ve been looking forward to it,” and slowly they all start talking again, but Chrissy can’t help but feel something’s shifted between the four of them.

#Buckingham #bandcheer #Steddie #Steve x eddie #Steddie fic #robin x Chrissy #Chrissy x robin #Chrissy is in the do I want to be her or be with her stage but hasn’t quite figured out the be with her part yet #i feel like i should warn for *something* but idk what :\#maybe that it's not really resolved #pizzaqueenfic

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marshmallowgoop · 2 months

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no thoughts just Heiji Hattori (HD)

#detective conan #case closed #amv #my amvs #eye strain #heiji hattori #harley hartwell #conan edogawa #shinichi kudo #funimation english dub script #video #happy two-year anniversary to 'no thoughts just heiji hattori'!#while it's not my first amv (it's maybe my... fifth?)#it was the first one i made with davinci resolve and the amv that really got me into editing amvs for real #it's the amv that made me believe i could make amvs 🥺#and in remastering it i deeply understood how ambitious it was! i thought i did a lot of audio mixing for 'messed up'#but that's not even close to all the audio mixing i did here--cannot believe that i did all this for my first big amv project #it took about 20 hours *just* to remaster!#which is something i've been meaning to do for a while now so i'm very happy to finally share the results!#to make this a 'remaster' and not a 'redo' the only changes i tried to make were to the source footage and audio #video now uses almost entirely hd remastered footage from my blu-rays or netflix rather than my dvds #but oh gosh was it *hard* not to touch anything else! i'd do so many things differently now #but this video will always be really special to me (and i can't believe i did it at all tbh!)#i hope seeing it in hd is fun too! i'm so blown away by all the love this vid's gotten #and that it helped increase interest in funi's old english dub is amazing and 100% what i was trying to do with it!#thank you everyone for all the support <333 i wouldn't be the video editor i am today without this vid or your encouragement for it <3333 #like the original the sources used are mostly from what funi dubbed (but mixed in hd by me!): eps 48-49 57-58 77-78 117 and 118 and movie 3 #but i also used episodes 141-142 174 189 239 263 277 291 293 345 479 491 517 and 522 #and ova 3 and tv special 6 (episode one) and movies 10 and 13 and ops 27 31 and 33 and the funi 5.2 dvd blooper for the one line lol #the song is 'you're stupid aren't you' by toshio masuda (from jubei-chan 2)

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moeblob · 3 months

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I am really tired of a situation rn.

#fe three houses #felix hugo fraldarius #me using felix on my angy days because he is my angersona? you bet!#anyway if you want to try to get someones money or something bc you hurt your own car banging into mine #can you try to be a bit more timely with it buddy come on you hit me on feb29 !#why am i getting your insurance company calling me today !#also i would like to point out i didnt do it and neither of us were hurt and i filed a claim with my own insurance comp #and also filed a police report bc he didnt even suggest calling the cops to the scene #so like yeah hey man maybe you and your insurance company can move a lil faster or smth #literally everything that happened the day of is - according to my dad - an intimidation tactic #i look like im 15 and he probably thinks he can take advantage of a new driver but ya know! tough luck!#im just really tired and stressed over multiple things not negative so getting this on top of it was like #bro .................... anyway my phone didnt pick up for some reason so i called back and then nothing got resolved #cause the person who actually called me wasnt around to connect the line to from the guy who answered #idk man just its a lot despite my v minimal energy #got a job interview on monday tho ! and then also next week is an eye exam #and you might be thinking isnt that a good thing to get your eyes checked? you are correct but i am horrified #there are two body parts that give me absolute anxiety and eyes are one of them #and i know my eye sight is declining and im just v anxious #its fine im going to be fine i just have to be anxious about it

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puppyeared · 10 months

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Thinking about my old pkmn ask blog

#I’m not really active in the community anymore but more because I grew away from it #I think about coming back a lot but Im not really sure what id do lol. I mean I think my storytelling and writing #skills have somewhat improved. but i still really really suck at making endings #although maybe I could make it like something that resolves the main problem and then just open for any interactions..#….fuck. I’m actually considering it now. I love impulsiveness 🧍#ugh but the other problem was that I would slowly stop updating as the dopamine slowed down and then just abandoned it altogether #multiple times in fact. since I’m the one making the content and not consuming it eeeuuhhgggghuhuhhhhhhh #this lil guy was supposed to have a story around his estranged family and his own problem with identity. I think I could still pick it up #i suck at writing edgy aloof dialogue so it always felt a little stilted or off when I wrote his dialogue. but I love him #myart #my art #oc #pokemon ask blog #pokeask #moss eevee #pokemon

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visualtaehyun · 5 months

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The brothers, Day's anger, and Night & Mork

Disclaimer: not a native Thai speaker, still learning 🙏

This is in part inspired (brainrot-induced? brainrot-fuelled?) by @chalkrevelations's post about the brothers and Day's behavior (go read it first if you're reading this!!) and in part just my usual language rambles observations.

Let's establish a few facts first (all pronouns presented as A/B are to be understood as I/you)

Night is older than Day - by enough that he's older even than Mork! (Mork and Porjai both call Night พี่ /phi/ while referring to Day as น้อง /nong/)

The brothers use กู/มึง /guu, mueng/ with each other, despite their age gap. These are informal pronouns that are actually pretty rude outside of using them with people you're close to because they're overly familiar -> for reference, Day, Gee and August all use these with each other, and Mork and Porjai use them with each other

Between ep. 1 and 2, Night and Mork go from the polite formal ผม/คุณ /pom, khun/ in both directions to Night using กู/มึง /guu, mueng/ and Mork using ผม/พี่ /pom, phi/ - they're friendly with each other! -> for reference, that's the exact same as you hear P'Aof and JimmySea using in the bts- P'Aof uses กู/มึง /guu, mueng/ while Jimmy and Sea use ผม/พี่ /pom, phi/ with him

Same as I've said that Mork and Day's way of speaking is getting sweeter, Day and Night are. uh. kind of the opposite. But also, they barely talk directly to each other anyway.

So let's look at that fight in the car in ep. 8

Night tries to engage Day and an awkwardly-caught-in-the-middle Mork takes up the speaking instead. When Day opts to use Mork as a middleman (just one of many instances of both brothers not speaking directly with each other), Night keeps on trying to engage him to no success. And then he just kinda- 🥴

ส่วนห้องน้ำคนพิการอยู่ทางขวา /suan haawng naam khohn phi gaan yuu thaang khwaa/ -> คนพิการ /khohn phi gaan/ = disabled/handicapped person (don't let the /phi/ in the romanization fool you, it has nothing to do with the pronoun พี่ /phi/)

I wonder since when they've been this distant because Night here isn't looking at Day like he's a person, he's almost looking at Day only through the lens of 'person I need to take care of' - because of the responsibility their mom has put upon him and because he's the older brother - anyone who's the eldest child among siblings and feels seen please raise your hand 🙋‍♀️

Night means well, he cares about his brother - but he's also ignorant and a bit of a klutz with his words. It's being singled out as disabled and the implication of needing special treatment in everything that tick Day off enough to speak directly to Night and start getting rude:

The word here is เหี้ย /hiia/ and it won't be the last time or the only curse word he uses.

Night is saying all the wrong things of course, while Mork is sitting in the back having to witness it all (and maybe being reminded of fights he's had with his own sister).

มึงรู้ปะ ตอนนี้กูเห็นเหี้ยไร /mueng ruu bpa, dtaawn nee guu hen hiia rai/ = You know what the fuck I see right now? กูไม่เห็นเหี้ยไรสักอย่างไง /guu mai hen hiia rai sak yaang ngai/ = I don't see a fucking thing! แล้วทุกอย่างแม่งก็หนักขึ้นเรื่อย ๆ /laaeo tuk yaang maaeng gaaw nak khuen reuuay reuuay/ = And it's all damn getting worse.

แล้วเพราะกูรู้ว่าแม่งแค่ฝันเนี่ยะ /laaeo phraw guu ruu waa maaeng khaae fan nia/ = And because I know it's just a damn dream, แม่งยิ่งเหี้ย /maaeng ying hiia/ = that's even more fucking shit.

Oof. Calm down, kiddo, this is your brother ;;

Day speaks with bitterness and resentment and viciousness. I don't think this started when Day started losing his sight but long before that, the way Day talks to and about his brother:

The only one who's looking out for Night is Mork

We actually get a lot of reaction shots of Mork silently watching and trying to parse the family dynamics, reaction shots of Night looking melancholic because of or happy for his brother, and sometimes it even looks like Night and Mork make sympathetic eye contact via reaction shots:

Night defends Mork several times in front of their mother and later tells Mork that they're grateful to him for making Day happier! And Mork does the same, he mentions Night to Day positively. Day doesn't realize it, for some reason, but Mork and Night talk to each other. And they see how Day interacts with the other one.

So it didn't surprise me at all to find out that Mork had gone behind Day's back yet again, after the brothers had that huge fight in the car. Of course Night knows where they are and that Day is safe. Of course Night knows. Night is constantly making sure that Day is okay without actually showing his involvement - he is just as invisible as Day and Mork were in parts of the story.

#last twilight #last twilight meta #last twilight night #thai bl #local woman harps on about linguistics #this got away from me a bit because it's really three thoughts combined plus some language stuff but i hope it's coherent enough dsjsdhsj #none of these three are perfect and they all make questionable choices and i love all of them for being such flawed realistic characters #i'm lowkey expecting shit to hit the fan soon considering the dad is also suddenly in the picture #i'm expecting day and mork to have a fight because of night and for it to maybe resolve because mork opens up about rung and probably havin #been a shitty brother to her or at least his feelings of guilt

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childrenofthesun77 · 6 months

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Assuming that the whole 'mahiru is the vessel needed to bring back the count and the 9th servamp will be the servamp of vainglory' theory will be correct, it's interesting how both mahiru and touma can be accused of this sin even if the way it applies to them is opposed.

What touma wants is to be acknowledged and to that end he was willing to become the villain who destroyed the world before mahiru and tsurugi managed to change his mind:

Mahiru's way of being vainglorious seems a lot more positive at first because he wants to be a hero who saves others, but it's self-destructive and encourages laziness in others:

But thankfully we see mahiru starting to let go of the need to make other people proud of him and to prioritize making himself proud in his conversation with tsurugi:

and later when mahiru has a meltdown because he fears his uncle might be dead and suggests sacrificing his life to save the world kuro rightfully yells at mahiru for acting hypocritical and not listening to his own advice:

(I want to mention here that I really love how horrified kuro looks as he realizes that mahiru's reckless hero behaviour comes from a very self-destructing place:

because not a lot of manga I know really acknowledge that maybe the way a lot of their protagonists try to be heroic is actually pretty unhealthy and shouldn't be encouraged? Like Sigurd pointed out at the C3 meeting, it's kind of shameful that the children have to save the day)

Which is why I love that mahiru decided to trust kuro to handle tsubaki without him going with him:

He decides to stay back with everyone else, showing that he has learned that he doesn't need to be the one to do everything and can stay back with the others to buy kuro time.

Interestingly we see touma doing something similar. Opposed to his old need to have the whole world acknowledge him he now wishes for everyone to believe he's dead and he's helping to protect the city by creating a huge barrier without making it known that's he the one doing this:

He's helping the protagonists seemingly with no intention of earning acknowledgement for it.

I think in a way it could be cool of servamp to subvert the shouned trope that for the finale battle the only one able to defeat the big bad is the protagonist while everyone else just watches on from the sidelines, not allowed to do anything because this is the protagonist's moment of glory.

What if lily's plan when he put kuro in mahiru's path was that if kuro tried to stop tsubaki at the gate surely his eve would need to be there with him, right? Because of course he needs his eve to fight and then there's also the distance limit. So why not make the vessel you need at that gate for the ritual to work kuro's eve? Then the vessel would be at the place where you need them without you even needing to do something because naturally they would be thinking they are doing the right thing by going with kuro to fight tsubaki together. And surely someone as vainglorious as mahiru would never pass up the opportunity to be the hero who stops tsubaki. It's foolproof!

Unless of course before the ritual the vessel learned to let go of their vainglorious nature, accepted that it's okay to take a step into the background and trust in others. And additionally also found a way to break through the whole forced proximity thing that the servamp and eves had going on.

I don't know, I feel like it would be a neat bow on mahiru's character arc and a unique way to thawrt the antagonists' plans if the creation of the servamp of vainglory failed because the 'it has to be me' guy they wanted to use as the vessel decided against glory and stayed back to let his partner handle things with tsubaki alone because he trusts him. Kuro on the other hand wants to make up for his past regrets and resolve the conflict through communication this time. Learning to trust in himself again by managing to talk tsubaki out of going through with the ritual on his own would be a logical conclusion to kuro's arc.

#servamp #mahiru shirota #taishi touma #This started as a short post about both touma and mahiru being vainglorious just with one wanting to be villain who destroys the world #While the one wants to be the hero who saves the world #because they both want to be acknowledged #And then it escalated into a post about how the two of them letting go of their vainglory might end up saving the day in the end #As for lily and mikuni I feel like that needs to be resolved by misono #He has to deal with lily to get out of the chess game and tell the others about what he has learned or to confront his brother #Mahiru doesn't really have a deep connection to lily or mikuni #He barely knows them and they see him as a pawn #The one who needs them to understand that he's not a child in need of protection to the point that all they did was lie to him is misono #Lily destroyed mikuni's and his kiriko's lives as well maybe misono can work with that?#Or maybe mikuni is playing 5d chess anyway and all he does serves his end goal to get revenge on lily by making sure his plan fails idk #It is weird that his best known spell has people get hanged if they killed other humans in their life #And now he wants to kill the people of tokyo for power? That doesn't make much sense doesn't it.

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yuseirra · 6 months

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full moon full life

I'm getting the feeling that p3 reload may be viewing the nighttime in a more brighter..colorful light compared to its original counterpart from the new osts. I think I appreciate that sort of new approach they're having

+added one more drawing!

#persona #persona 3 #persona 3 reload #whereas burn my dread had that determined-solemn-striving for life kind of mood #full moon full night feels less lonely and more colorful-it has this'I'm not alone!' vibe and the song feels more warm #I really love how burn my dread is so full of resolve and has this 'I'm not messing around anymore' attitude #but I'm starting to really appreciate how welcoming full moon full life sounds..full of life like how the title is #doodle #I think that's what the remake is trying to go for too #maybe the new op is indicating the protagonist doesn't have to struggle and carry everything all on his own anymore #that's just my interpretation at least #p3 reload

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whatsagirltoblogabout · 7 months

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Having thoughts about Neal Caffrey and a twist on the Will Herondale curse where instead of it being "everyone you love will die", it's "everyone who loves you will die."

#and so he resolves to never let anyone know the real him so that they can never really love him and therefore are safe #hence becoming a con artist #idk if this idea is going anywhere yet #I just needed it out of my head because I have a long day of accounting training ahead of me and don't want this distracting me #girlwriting #maybe #don't hold me to that lol #white collar #neal caffrey

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endlesslytired · 2 days

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oh there's a lot of Sushang here.

prevuous post:

#i am once again pushing my fenhang agenda #i was shipping this since guinaifen was the red haired girl in sushang's letters to her mother #they're both my favourites of the xianzhou #and then my gf's favourites are fu xuan and qingque #and shes in a similar position on that #(referencing my solidarity in underrated ships post)#honkai star rail #honkai star rail memes #hsr sushang #hsr fu xuan #hsr guinaifen #hsr tingyun #hsr huohuo #hsr bailu #I'm kinda glad we're going back to the xianzhou because really that was never resolved fully #like did we actually stop the stellaron there? because I don't think the phantylia fight was a stellaron thing #but it was just like a fight with a lord ravager.#and like what even was jing liu and luocha's goal?#maybe I just missed some things #but until we get hunt trailblazer it's unlikely we're done there.

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youredreamingofroo · 19 days

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The Passenger (2023) dir. Carter Smith // NEVER AGAIN - MICHELLE

#the passenger #post:music #yapping #i actually havent been able to stop thinking of this scene with this song #idk i feel like (some of) these lyrics are fitting for this #“everything reminds me of them” -me listening to my personal playlist #i prolly have like 200 other songs i could use with these two AISJUHDGFB #“i thought i knew you better than this” dont mind me ripping my teeth out. thinking about how benson didnt even think-#-randy couldve been the one to call. that he was truthful when he said he needed to use the restroom.#that the woman who had nothing in her pockets. no phone. was the one who called. not even considering to check randys pockets-#-after leaving him alone. ughghhfhhhdgfj #ik benson prolly wouldve wanted to die anyways. to prove his point.#-but i do still think a part of him really DID want to undo the past few hours. to before seeing sheppard.#maybe then they could've 'resolved' another one of Randys problems. and left town. gone to the city even.

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monstersinthecosmos · 10 months

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not for anything but friendly reminder that ~fandom discourse~ about where women belong (or people you perceive as women) is misogynistic as fuck. or what they're allowed to say, or what they're allowed to write about, or what they're allowed to enjoy.

next time you see someone having a tantrum and vaguing, especially if their posts from week to week completely contradict each other, perhaps analyze if the common denominator is "a gross woman said something and now i'm mad" without otherwise adhering to any actual principles.

#like i wonder if someone consistently preaches that we need to respect each other's headcanons #but they are specifically bothered by women & people they assume are women #and they keep specifically complaining about how ANNOYING GIRLS are the ones with such STUPID ideas #if maybe that person is just a fucking misogynist LMAO #and maybe we shouldn't give them the time of day :)#but what do i know lol im just a dumb girl with my dumb girl brain #anyway sorry guys i hate posting vagues i think it's really immature but like how much of this do we fucking tolerate #and can you please stop reblogging him bc tumblr's block & mute functions are terrible #if i'm not vague about it does it still count as a vague?#i hate public drama but like he didn't want to resolve it in private either and won't shut the fuck up haha sorry #but i also fucking hate bullies so #:)#also in b4 fandom clique conspiracies start floating around #if you act like a misogynist dickhead and get blocked by a bunch of people #it's not a cabal of mean girls ganging up on you #maybe you're the problem lol #knock it the fuck off aren't you tired of this it's been a year man #get a life.

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certifiedlesbianvampire · 4 months

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my thoughts and theories on ep 5

starting with the things i did like, i think the animation + visuals are overall very consistent for the series so far. the tone of the episode was a bit more serious because, well... akutaro and the gang war and the growing tensions between characters.

we finally got see the full flashback of matakara and arajin's backstory and it was a nice surprise to see how matakara stood up for himself and arajin of course runs away (understandable) but i'm hoping in future episodes we get more on their pasts (with matakara's brother too. maybe the reason his brother is in juvie is because he did something bad to the bullies and he didn't tell/lied to matakara? this could be interesting later on) and how it affects the present and future character growth. I hope we also get to see the reason why arajin moved away as it’ll help us understand his character more (literally running away from circumstances. A lot of his character is running away and how he has to confront it) akutaro is a fun villain! a complete dramatic and horny menace. i'm so glad he got his face punched in. i wonder how he got ichiya (what influence does ichiya have over him/he have over ichiya?) and if he’ll continue to be the series’ big bad later on or if he’ll just be the antag for this arc.

the good thing about arajin being so indecisive about joining anyone is that we get to see how each gang operates. this time, we see the ng boys (and girls?? they have girls too) and how akutaro has everyone under his finger. he uses fear and threats to manipulate them into doing what he wants, forces them to do his dirty work. we also see how he got kicked out of minatokai and a bit of kenichiro and marito's battle in the background. i wonder how the blue majin will merge with matakara because it's foreshadowed heavily. (“no doubt those kicks are ichiya’s” and matakara’s fighting style revolves around them) right now the blue majin is with akutaro) i’m also dying to know senya’s motives and past with ichiya and how it could tie into the conflict between their person.

i feel like the gag of arajin and his *cough* rampant thinking with his dick is starting to wear on my nerves a bit, but i don't HATE him. i get that his character is supposed to be poking fun at that trope. i think what's interesting is that you could point out that male characters who are considered to be strong also happen to have lots of connections + affections (platonic or romantic) toward other men. arajin by contrast, rejects it in favour of chasing after women (maybe it’s what he thinks will prove his masculinity to others? or it's like. a distraction from his issues?)

maybe it’s not that deep, but it's something i wanted to point out anyway.

on the topic of arajin: my biggest worry is that while i DO have hope arajin's character development is on the way soon, i am concerned that they'll start it too late (like ep 10 which is unlikely but) and not give us enough time to fully sympathize or connect with his relationship towards matakara and the others around him. i understand he's supposed to be a selfish and unlikeable character, but i feel with like there's only so long you can stretch out the drama before it wears thin if you don’t expand on it; which is something have hope that they’ll do since there’s a lot of setup there.

i know arajin’s character is why most people are dropping the anime, but i'm hoping most people will at least be patient for the development. we're only at episode 5. (like sk8 for example had the conflict span from ep 7-10. this is a larger scale conflict so ofc it'd take longer) bucchigiri has a lot of potential, and i’m hoping they’ll stick the landing.

(i also need to see the fight between kenichiro and marito next ep ; i know it'll be awesome.) with the title of the next ep's title being "much much friendship! 'nira-reba'-lution 21!" i do hope we get to see much, much more in terms of friendships (a falling out maybe?) , arajin-related or otherwise. i'm excited to see where the anime goes next!

#matakara deserves a hug. maybe get to see and spend time with his brother again #congrats to all the hagure and jabashiri fans who got the heart hand ed card and like 1 sec of screentime #matakara is too good for all this #zabu is a real one for breaking him out #also this episode shows that mahoro cares on SOME level about matakara and arajin #not fully lmao but she can be sympathetic at least #she was crazy this ep tho ☠️ calm down #I wonder how mitsukuni lost his place as 42nd leader and if it relates to the rivalry between gangs or matakara or a secret third thing #akutaro really is the greater of the two evils in comparison to the other gangs #bucchigiri?!#arajin tomoshibi #matakara asamine #also side note idk about the production and if there’s any issues behind this show but i hope the people on it get to take a break at least #or it gets resolved #it's interesting to see everyone's thoughts on the episode so far #certifiedlesbianvampire’s rambles

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ferrarihamilton · 8 months

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STORMCHASER?? 👀

this fic has been ruminating in my head for almost a year..... it's a chalex au where charles stopped racing after winning gp3, and alex's family moved to the US when he was young and he visits every summer break just before storm season starts.

Charles texts him at 3:18AM on a Saturday in the middle of July: Alex! I hope you are dreaming sweet dreams. I will be in Dogwood in a week! Can I stay with you?

Alex smiles when he sees it in the morning. Charles asks the same question every summer, and he’s always so polite about it. Like Alex hasn’t seen him throw up on himself after drinking a box of wine, and hasn’t been opening his house to Charles for four years now. Like he doesn’t know how the first thing Alex does upon waking is check the forecast. He might not have the fancy equipment that Charles has, but he can see the cartoon of a little raincloud with lightning as well as anybody else. They’re promised high winds at the beginning of August. Alex had already prepared the spare room.

He replies, Hey charlie. What day would you be arriving?

The typing bubbles appear immediately, and a second later a string of kissy faces come through, followed by Hmmm thursday I think

Alex thumbs up the message, and then sends a photo of his view of the sunrise for good measure. In the foreground, there’s his windowsill, littered with various trinkets that Charles has brought before, and then below, the cafe's porch awning, and the sprawling fields for miles to see. Even without opening the window, the air feels fractious, hot.

Alex knows Charles understands, because he sends back four emojis: a battery, an electric plug, a thermometer, and a satellite. Alex smiles again, helplessly, before tucking his phone into his back pocket and heading out start his day.

Chloe is already starting to make breakfast. She turns as she hears him come down the stairs, and smirks when she sees his face. “Charles due soon?”

“Shut it,” he says. Chloe just smirks wider as she hands him a bowl and a carton of eggs.

+++++

Dogwood, Oklahoma, population 300, sits on State Highway 39, and the township’s economy is mostly fuelled by the tourists heading north to Kansas. It’s completely unremarkable, utterly boring, and the perfect place to spend three weeks of summer when your day job normally consists of multiple timezones a week.

His mum had bought the house and the attached cafe soon after they moved to the US: Albon's, a classic tourist trap place with cheap sandwiches and coffee, morphed into half a farm slash petting zoo when Luca wouldn’t stop rescuing animals and plunking them firmly in their backyard. The tourists kept asking about the donkeys wandering around the picnic tables, and Zoe had said eventually, “Well if they’re not going away, we might as well make some money.” They’re proudly advertised as family-owned and operated, which is supposed to make the people feel good about spending their money there, but mostly gets brought up through gritted teeth whenever Zoe and their mum argue about finances.

Alex tries not to get involved. Even though he makes more than enough money now for them to not need the cafe, he thinks it keeps his mum happy, to be reminded of the first life they'd had that was completely theirs.

And the cafe is how him and Charles are still friends. Alex had been furious when Charles told him he wasn't continuing with racing after winning GP3. Alex would have given everything to have beaten him, and here Charles was, acting like it didn't mean anything.

But Charles had followed him to Oklahoma that winter, instead of going home. He'd helped out at the cafe, and the night before his flight back to Monaco, he'd told Alex that he'd enrolled at Oklahoma State, tentative major in mech-E. Later, Alex will think that he probably had wanted to be an astronaut. Instead, when Charles' prof in sophomore year had taken his class out in the middle of a thunderstorm, and Charles had dragged Alex along with him, Alex had had the almost religious experience of watching Charles’ face as the sky crackled with lightning.

They’re still good friends; they text fairly frequently, but it’s been a year since they’ve seen each other. Charles is a proper stormchaser now, galivanting around the country on grant money from the college. He looks happy in every photo he posts on Instagram, writes long blog posts using words like isobars and Doppler effect and mobile broadband MNVO. And without fail, he stays at Alex's family home for a week before the storm season begins in earnest, and Alex sends him off to run after tornadoes, like a wife watching her husband leave for war.

+++++

Charles arrives in a flurry, bringing with him a battered Jeep fitted with mods Alex isn’t entirely sure are legal. As she does every year, his mother comes out to stand next to him on the porch as they pull up, and her eyebrows are thoroughly unimpressed until Charles’ smiling face hops out.

“Oh Charles!” she coos. “He was always such a good boy,” and then Charles is kissing her on both cheeks, saying hello and how she looks as beautiful ever, before he turns his attention on Alex, and even though Alex is twenty-six, he feels himself flush.

“Alexander,” Charles singsongs, and then mushes his face into Alex’s collarbone as he hugs him. Alex huffs out a laugh, wraps his own arms around Charles.

“It’s good to see you too,” he tells him. Charles beams at him, and Alex hasn’t followed Charles on one of his tornado chases since he was twenty, but under his gaze, he feels supercharged, electric.

Charles insists on helping out around the farm, because Alex absolutely puts his foot down when Charles offers to pay them for his week stay. This would be useful, because it’s the busiest part of the tourist season, if Charles were not completely useless. He takes nervous steps away when the animals approach him, clumsy with the dirty plates when clearing tables, and even though Alex knows that Charles can operate software with GIS overlay and the college’s ham radios that tune into Skywarn frequencies, he stares at their cash register with the same trepidation most people approach large spiders. And despite all of that— he charms all the little old ladies that come though the café doors, even when he messes up the orders. He makes Melina laugh, which in turn, lets Zoe get on with the bookkeeping undisturbed. He also brings in a shitload of tips. Alex hides a smile, watching Charles flit around and somehow be totally out of place and completely at home all at once.

It’s hard not to be charmed by Charles, his quick hands and the way he looks when he’s concentrating. Alex was a lost cause when he was eighteen; he sees no reason why that might have changed now.

+++++

Alex is always worried that Charles will get bored when he stays. Usually, he’s a doer, not a worrier, but he still has a training regime to keep up, so it's not like Alex can skive off to entertain Charles.

But they do have one tradition, and there’s nothing else to do on a Saturday night. So Alex takes the pickup truck they usually use for moving animals, cleans the hay and muck out, and drives Charles out to the fields. It’s a clear night, and they can see the stars, and he spreads out the blanket over the truckbed, throws down a couple of pillows, and leans back to look up at the night sky.

“Tell me about your year,” Charles demands, once they've settled in.

Alex shrugs. Anybody can find out how his year is going from every sports website under the sun. He nudges Charles. “Tell me about your year.”

But Charles shrugs too, even though he’s smiling, and starts telling him about clouds instead. “Cumulonimbus,” he says. “Cumulus means ‘heap’ in Latin and ‘nimbus’ means storm cloud. They mean a storm is coming— air currents care carrying the water vapour up. When they develop, they have this dome.” He cups his hands into shape. “And then they can become supercells.”

Alex knows about the team that Charles is going with this year: Lewis, who used to work for the National Weather Service but now he’s a storm spotter for fun; Seb, a professor of climatology and technically their team lead; Daniel, who looks like he’s only there because he’s an adrenaline junkie and a good driver.

Alex knows from reading the captions on Charles’ Instagram posts that storm season starts in August, and the café is the first stop. For the next two months, he’ll follows the weather patterns as they shift and morph on radar displays, driving into fields, into wide-open terrains of grass and dirt and lakes with no roads and a cloudless sky, and waiting for the winds to pick up before they go.

He knows their time is limited, so Alex drinks in the sight of Charles and all the ways he’s changed in the time they’ve been apart. He tries not to wish for anything more.

At the end of the week, two more Jeeps roll into the driveway, Seb, Lewis, and Daniel all get introduced in quick fashion, and then Charles kisses Alex high on his cheek, and waves at him the whole time they’re driving away. Alex watches him go, waving, sore.

+++++

August turns into September, and the season picks up again. Williams has a solid midfield car now, and it's good, seeing the fruits of his hard work, having a team around him that listens to him, takes him seriously. Him and Charles continue to text, infrequently, as they always have. Charles tells him about amazing tornadoes, sends photos of himself at the World’s Largest Ball of Twine in nowhere towns on the side of highways, miles and miles of cornfields.

In return, Alex sends photos of the track, some terrible coffee they make him try for a marketing challenge, Luca screwing his face up at his maths homework, the crowd of fans at Singapore.

This is why it’s particularly insulting, that Alex finds out from fucking Lando of all people, that Charles got struck by lightning.

“What,” he says. His hands are clammy where he’s clutching his phone.

“Yeah, Max mentioned it to me. Guess Daniel told him. They’re having one of their weird on again things again.”

Alex couldn’t care less about whatever drama Lando has embroiled himself in. He’d known, logically, the risks of storm chasing. Except it was Charles, who has always seemed bigger than it all, exempt from the rules of physics and karma and everything else that made the rest of them mortal.

He checks Charles’ Instagram after Lando hangs up. The last post is still there, from a few hours ago. Alex had already seen it, liked it, thought nothing of it. A photo of a long stretch of highway, Daniel’s exaggeratedly frown. Location tagged Humboldt, Tennessee: stuck here for a few days with an upside down smiley face.

There’s a shiver running up his spine, a tense, live wire. If he touched anybody right now, he’s be unsurprised if the venom of it ran straight through them.

That feeling only intensifies in the twenty-four hours between Landos call and him pulling up outside the only motel in Humboldt. He stands outside the car feeling angry and frightened as he figures out what to say to Charles. This is greatly ruined by how Charles stumbles out ten minutes later in socks and slides, and stops dead.

“Alex?” He blinks. "You're supposed to be in Austin."

Alex is; it's Wednesday, race week. He has media duties in the paddock tomorrow.

“Did you get taller?” Charles asks, when Alex still doesn't say anything.

“I don’t think so,” Alex manages to get out. He's still feeling that sickly furious feeling, and Charles must see it on his face, because he huffs.

“Fucking— I’m fine, the car is ruined but it had to happen at some point.”

“Does it?”

Charles squints at him. “Is this a trick question?”

"Charles," Alex says, but he's stopped by movement in the motel. harles glances back. A door is open, and Seb is lounging casually against the door frame in sweats. Alex didn’t know it was possible for a man wearing a headband to look so frightening.

“Let’s go for a drive,” Charles says.

+++++

Charles directs them back onto the highway. He riddles with the radio, turning the dials until it crackles into a frequency that’s giving a weather report. Alex has to keep his eyes on the road to drive, but he knows what Charles looks like even without turning his head: lips pursed, hands twitching like he’s looking for a notebook before his thoughts fly away.

"Here," Charles finally says. It’s a dirt road turn off that looks like it leads nowhere, but Alex turns off all the same.

“You’re here,” Charles says wonderingly, even before he's killed the engine. Alex takes a deep breath, turns to face Charles. Seeing his face, whole, open, looking at Alex in that way lets the last of Alex’s worry melt away.

“Okay,” Charles says, and Alex leans forward and fists his hand in the collar of Charles’ shirt, and kisses him.

#jo writes fic #chalex #this one is actually kind of good........ maybe i'll give it another crack #i was going to explore all the 'what if' possibilities of drivers choosing not to be drivers. what life could have been !!!#& esp coming off the back of alex's 2020/2021 years - how it would feel to watch charles do something equally adrenaline inducing #and be really really good at it. but ultimately alex choosing to go back to racing bc he loves it #and therefore him being better at racing for the resolve in that choosing #ALSO HI KAY !!!!!

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