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#maybe it's just really fucking annoying idk
catbeeisafraid · 2 days
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I don’t have like a ton to say about this but I have mixed feelings- also spoilers ✨
I like Crystal I really do but at times her dialogue bothered me and some of her behavior was kind of obnoxious to me- like at times when she started aggressively inserting herself into situations and just kind of made it about her? Like in episode seven (though this happened many other times too) where she was having a total fit about not going to hell when it’s clearly for her own good and not about her no matter how much she cares? and I totally understand that this is her being written as an immature teenager who hasn’t been dead or a teen for 30-100 years but as a teenager this sort of selfish immature writing kind of gives me icky feelings because I know so many people who are mostly emotionally intelligent not just raging all the time.- and I mean that for a lot of teenagers and teen girls in writing, to make them tough and likable they are made volitile and annoying which to me is not likable (my opinion, I just don’t like the trope that’s not what I’m talking about right now anyway-) I do think she had good development and I liked her a lot better by the end, some people on other forums were saying that her actress was weaker than the rest of the cast and I don’t really know about that? I think maybe she was artificial at times but I’m blaming that on the writing. I also didn’t like her dialogue about her “crazy demon ex” either, it felt very forced? -Not her emotions about the whole mind cage thing I get that but just all of the “UGH WHY ARE THEY SO FUCKING NOSY IM JUST TRYING TO GET OVER MY STUPID STUPID CRAZY ABUSIVE STALKER DEMON EX BOYFRIEND UGHHH ILL DOUBLE KILL THOSE BOYS IF ITS TGE LAST THING I DO” that felt out of place to me- Lastly I get that this is also an aspect of her teenager-ness but I didn’t like the amount she cursed? I have no qualms with cursing but it felt to me like when little kids and middle schoolers start cursing where they just explosively yell fuck when like literally nothing warranting that kind of expletive has happened? She curses too often it makes her sound really stupid? Like the ep 7 “take me to hell I won’t die” thing, she was screaming at Charles who was being pretty reasonable like “fuck that I’m going he’s my fucking friend too fine then fuck it- fuck you ill find another way to get to hell” like yes she was emotional but that isn’t what teenagers sound like guys?
idk- I’d love to hear what other people think and to be clear I do like her I just focused on the negative- I guess it’s a human thing. She had lots of strong points just I ending up not liking how much she was on screen, this isn’t really about you? It’s about the dead boy detective? Give me more ghosts or Edwin or Charles or Jenny or Niko or Mr walrus please? They were fun I like them? I just felt like there were times where she was over shadowing Edwin and Charles and they are what’s actually important to the show? I think I’d like her more in smaller doses- I felt like I spent too much time having to stop and be like “girl step back this is not about you, you are not the star right now”
and to the argument of her actress being inexperienced or over acting or just not great- I have no specific feelings on this but like the other main cast had for the most part very little screen acting experience and were Fantastic so i don’t know what to feel in that area? so yes, i think crystal is an interesting character and i think she grew on me and developed in the season but i also definitely think that she’s annoying and I’m conflicted because i don’t want to not like her-..
what are your thoughts? Id love to hear different perspectives but please be nice to me because I’ll probably delete this and cry (unless that was your goal, then carry on)
that was all like super ramble-y sorry- but I hope I communicated semi accurately! Thank you
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eoinmcgonigal · 4 months
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it's really upsetting me so to get it off my chest i'm gonna confess that the positivity posts i saw yesterday really hurt. i didn't realise that was a thing in this fandom, and i wish it wasn't because those things inevitably leave people feeling left out and like their presence isn't worth anything to the fandom (plus readers, rebloggers and commenters are integral to fandom community but don't usually get a shoutout). i'm already struggling because of this horrible trend towards using threads in discord which renders most of the servers inaccessible to me, i feel extremely isolated and alone and unwanted, but i was doing okay muddling along churning out fic and a few silly polls and posts now and then until yesterday. the fic i posted today just made me feel so sad after i posted it. it was a lovely fic :( but like what is the point. if i'm worth so little i might as well not be here. why put the effort into making things if no one notices. i already feel so lonely it's like i'm being torn in two, posting things now and then brought me comfort but idk what i have now
#i'm in a deleting everything kinda mood#no one remembered me? oh. okay :(#fuckin hurts so much#i want to finish the johnny stuff but i feel so unbearably miserable now and i don't want to spend hogmanay like that#but i also can't bear to leave it unfinished#i wish i'd never scrolled my dash yesterday then i'd never have known about those posts#it brought me so much joy to write and share those fic#absolutely crushing to discover i don't inspire the same joy in the fandom#i was kinda impressed with having written so much i thought it was kinda cool#maybe it's just really fucking annoying idk#sorry just so lonely and upset and the places i find sanctuary are falling to pieces and i'd actually like to die now thanks#so much shit is going on irl you have no idea and i don't have a support network it's terrifying#nothing i do is worth anything#no one wants me#did u no my mother discarded all the photos that had me in them? kid me just. discarded. she took everyone else and threw me out#shit like that hurts i wish i had a new family or friends to chat to as a distraction when shit gets bad#i mean i get discord dm notifications (not server mentions) if anyone dms me but lol guess how often that happens#i get tumblr dm notifications it's been the only place i've talked to anyone for ages so shoutout to those two wonderful people#god i just. want to be included?#i tried#i failed#fuck.#maybe this is goodbye idk i had stuff to finish up/share#and a million more fics i wanted to write#i don't even know if i can face doing tomorrow's johnny fic#i wanted to do the 12 days of christmas too :(#but the fact now exists that i just... wasn't good enough for this fandom :'(#also i can't face the notifications tab#if it's not a Direct Message i won't see it#god there was SO MUCH i wanted to share! there were gifs i was gonna make to share the suffering and gift fic and silly posts
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What was Lights out! Frank's reaction to crazy ass Lights out! Wally?
ah i wouldn't call him crazy, Wally's just desensitized to the Horrors and acts accordingly. which is occasionally a little unhinged. but no yeah Frank has a proper freakout <3 he has a hard time adjusting to certain aspects of.... everything. including Wally yeah
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(don't bother trying to read this i know its terrible handwriting lmao, it's p much just to show Frank's spiral <3)
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autistic-beshelar · 1 month
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ah yes dungeon meshi, the manga where an autistic man gets repeatedly bullied by people he thinks are his friends and not a single person supports him
#dont get me wrong i am enjoying this manga#but i'm failing to see how this is some great amazing autistic rep#like yeah laios is obviously autistic#and the struggles he has due to his autism are VERY relatable#but it's deeply uncomfortable that even the people closest to him are routinely awful to him#specifically for his autistic traits#and their bullying is almost always a joke#not a single person defends him#literally senshi is the only character that's never been cruel to him#well and farlyn but lbr she's also autistic and also has been in like half a chapter that ive read so far#maybe ive just not read far enough or not seen enough posts#but im not understanding why the fandom are treating it like amazing autistic rep and how it understands us so well#you could argue that the narrative tends to support laios's methods and way of thinking#but nothing else does#the scene with shuro was fucking awful to read tbh#'you're so annoying because you're autistic. how dare you think im your friend when you should have just guessed that i hated you'#and not a single person defends laios#or calls shuro out on what a fucking horrific way of treating a party member that is#like i dont know MAYBE you could have just said 'hey i don't really want to be friends'#maybe you could COMMUNICATE.#but no it's the autistic man who's the problem. for the crime of.... being too nice.#i don't have a problem with the scene.#i have a problem with the fact that shuro is framed as reasonable here. instead of utterly fucking vile.#i have a problem with none of the other characters sticking up for laios.#dungeon meshi#maybe ppl will start treating him better#i would like to continue reading#but if he continues getting bullied in EVERY fucking chapter as a 'joke' then idk man
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ihateornithologists · 28 days
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someone needs therapy ig
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apollotronica · 4 months
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eczema
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tortellinigirl · 2 years
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I feel like recently, ADHD has kind of become shorthand for “a person who is annoying online and has no real problems,” and I don’t really think that’s awesome news, given the context that ADHD has a long history of being disregarded as a made up disorder that’s just an excuse for poor/obnoxious behavior, no matter how much scientific research proves otherwise. ADHD is not by any means the only disorder that has people making a thousand misleading tiktoks about it, so perhaps do some critical thinking about why specifically ADHD has become the poster child for that behavior. There are certainly valid criticisms to be made of the way we discuss mental health online, but maybe use your brain and determine why this disorder in particular is the one that’s easiest to point at for being “annoying” and “not that big of a deal.”
#idk maybe if u actually watched a couple of the tiktoks u might learn that the lack of focus thing is reall not the main issue#its just what the people around us are most likely to notice and be bothered by#not saying it doesnt get obnoxious seeing people say the same thing over and over#and yes some people are like purposely vague and disingenuous about the symptoms to get views from people thinking they have it now#but i see that with everything. like autism PTSD depression OCD anxiety#im always getting tiktoks saying that im a lesbian or i have repressed memories or “x normal thing is a symptom of y disorder!!”#and yes its annoying but its probably somewhat helpful to people who actually are dealing w those things#and also like. if u simply stop treating ur for you page like a crystal ball that sees into your soul and reflects it back#and realize its just an algorithm designed to make u interact whether thats bc u like what u saw or fucking hated it#then u will not be as bothered !#but yes our generation seems to have a habit of constantly trying to find the right box to out ourselves in so we can be like. “marketable”#like people seem to want to design their personality like an movie character or something#but its so shitty that we’re dog piling all that on ADHD as if our specific disorder has anything to do with it#also personally i think its kind of normal to be really focused on a particular aspect of your identity when u just discovered it#and it usually evens out and just becomes part of the background of your identity#but yes there’s often a problem with pathologizing normal things#but i think its important to recognize that lots of things that are normal occasionally are pathological in excess. like thats how it works#like we’ve all been through how being sad sometimes is not the same as depression#why cant we grasp that occasionally going into a room and forgetting why you’re there isnt the same as ADHD#my posts
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wildflowercryptid · 4 months
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something that's been weighing on my mind ever since learning about the situation with ezra / toonimal is seeing how these predators will take the active hostility that is frequently directed towards minors in online spaces to their advantage and use it to prey on vulnerable children. i think that we as adults in online fandom should probably come together and maybe rethink the language / manner we go about interacting with kids bc clearly the way things are rn is causing active harm.
like obviously, if you're an adult and aren't comfortable with minors interacting with you or your content, you should be allowed to set that boundary and should be vocal about it, ( especially if the content you create isn't safe for them to consume. ) but i don't think talking to them like they're a blight on all that is good and holy is the way to go about it. maybe just saying you're an 18 plus account will suffice, you don't have to tell them to fuck off.
#i'm opening myself up for ppl to leave the stupidest takes on this post but whatever i need to get this off my mind#before anyone says anything about the kids on that website. they're grooming victims. they're literally kids being taken advantage of#show them some fucking kindness and be understanding that they're the victims in this situation#idk what it is about becoming an adult that causes so many ppl to lose their empathy towards minors it's weird#like yeah kids can be annoying and pushy on online spaces sometimes but a lot of them are old enough to know online etiquette lbr#alot of us were annoying kids on the internet at some point we should understand that you don't just. get a handbook for how to act online#that's shit you learn overtime but ppl seem to forget that#they also seem to forget that talking down to kids isn't gonna teach them shit they're not gonna listen to you if you treat them like idiots#what i'm trying to say is that we really need to talk to minors more respectfully and maybe give them a little grace#( obviously there will be situations where some of them need to be yanked up by the collar but there's ways to go about that >>>#without treating them like shit )#these kids need to know that there's spaces for them to be online safely without having to stumble into places that'll pray on them#we all know how much it sucked to be a kid online we should want better for the ones coming in after us ya know#sorry if this comes across as preachy it just breaks my heart and boils me blood to see kids being taken advantage of like this#especially when there's ways to prevent it idk#how do i even tag this....#mj.txt#there's trigger warning on the linked post btw#tw csa mention
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nextstopparis · 1 year
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me explaining how everything would’ve been different after bbc merlin episode 2.08 the sins of the father if morgause had juST USED THAT DAMNED CRYSTAL SOONER and seen arthur actually fighting uther and being lied to and manipulated back into thinking uther was right because tHEN SHE COULDVE SOUGHT HIM OUT BUT ALONE THIS TIME AND DEFENDED HERSELF AND GOTTEN ARTHUR ON HER SIDE and then when she reached out to morgana the three of them would’ve teamed up and brought uther to his knees
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went to go clothes shopping today and i got the cuntiest misa-esque dress for like $8 at the thrift store <3
#it’s covered in hearts and it’s strapless w a low lace-up back and the skirt is short and poofy but it’s sewn at the edges so that the#skirt is like a sphere-ish shape that holds fairly well and i should prob just draw it so what i’m saying makes sense but it is super cute#and i also got some jeans which is new for me i’ve not worn jeans since. um. i think the last time i wore jeans i was. idk. before#i started dressing myself? so under 5 maybe? idk pants feel really restricting to me and jeans esp that’s why i’m always wearing skirts#but i feel up to it rn bc i’ve always thought they were cute and also i think i’m comfortable enough in my skin to do so which i think it’s#usually the opposite for ppl they like pants and are afraid of dresses bc they’re uncomfortable/self conscious/whatever but for me#skirts have always been a safety blanket and they are so comfortable but sometimes skirts are just not practical so i need to like#get comfortable wearing pants and i tried doing it a couple years back but i was like in the midst of an eating disorder so that didn’t go#down well but i’m cool now i’m chill abt things and wearing skirts all the time makes ppl peg me as fem and i’m like ahhhhh stop she/her-in#me when i’m obvi in femboy mode or like when i’m being androgynous but i happen to be wearing a skirt w my outfit it’s annoying#anyway it took me two fucking hours to figure out what size i was bc skirts u don’t really have a size bc u just need it to fit ur waist#and ur golden but pants are so complicated and i have wide hips and thick thighs and it took me foreverrrr to find the right size#but i did and now i will never have to do all of that ever again <3 bc it was stressful every second that i wasn’t looking in the mirror#and making bedroom eyes at myself <3
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non-un-topo · 8 months
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Talking to my sister can be one of the most aggravating experiences
#just allowing myself a few moments of self-pity today#because i'm a little overstimulated/sick of people talking AT me#i have begun to notice that i'm never asked anything... not a single thing. no questions about my life or interests or how school is going#no questions about my partner or our anniversary and no acknowledgement of the big haircut i just got#no questions about my BIL's wedding. none about my health.#every day it's just people talking AT me. kind of tired at the moment...#and this is made worse by my sister's holier-than-thou attitude about literally the smallest and most insignificant things#like washing clothes? and cooking rice?? idk she talks like a housewife now.#and i get to listen to her complain about her 35 year old boyfriend and not say ONE kind thing for 2 hours straight#not a single question for me. not a single nice thing. and i'm talked over constantly#it's not like i don't raise my voice or speak my mind lol#it's just that. between my family and my partner's family. it feels like no one knows just how smart i am and how much fun i can be.#my partner is perfect in so many ways. my best friend and the kindest and most compassionate person i know.#but i really could brag and boast like my sister does over absolutely nothing. because i have actual achievements. but i don't#because who does that lol. fucking annoying and rude people.#maybe my family just thinks i'm okay and so they never ask me anything or call me. ever.#but see.... i don't talk to them because i want advice or help or money. i talk to them because they're my family#and i would very much like to feel cherished and loved by them#/ end angst and self-pity boo hoo
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tomboyyyaoi · 11 months
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i cant describe it but people just putting meryl and milly in the background of vashwood instead of just putting them front and centre in their own piece genuinely feels like im being cucked like why did u even bother
like damn maybe id like the ship more if people didnt just go "theyr so cute and soft and married aahhh so so gentle and femme and girly theyr so cyute" then the only time they draw them is like. idfk them walking in on vash and wolfwood fucking eachothers brains out like god. all talk.
#i think its the only reason i dont like the pairing like. i like them theyr cute but. idk for me theyr not romantic#and its like. really annoying when people just say they ship them but its just lip service bc they rlly wanna pretend they care#but the truth is is that ive seen maybe 3 people put milly/meryl front and centre in their own dedicated art#and it was good#ppl just dont know what to do w them#not that i do either but hey at least i dont claim to ship them#listen im not tryin 2 dictate or anything#but fr it annoys me sm when people pretend to ship them to either go 'see? i do care about women!!! (lie)' or to get them 'out of the way'#DONT SAY U SHIP THEM IF U DONTTTT FUCK STOP PRETENDING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#id rather u just leave them out of it like genuinely its such an insult to their characters like god#even nightow doesnt shove them to the back this much and they werent present for like 30 chapters at one point#BECAUSE HE KNEW IT WOULD BE MORE IMPACTFUL TO BRING THEM BACK IN SOME BIG REVEAL AND GIVE THEM SOMETHING TO DO#bc he respected his characters enough to not have them just bumble about in the background doing fuckall while he figured them out#so they were temporarily removed from the plot and them coming back and being Ready 2 Fucken Go was powerful it was so cool#please just respect these girls ffs stop having them be the Background Cardboard Cutout Dykes#so so so so so so annoying 2 me as a meryl and milly lover#rbs off i dont wanna start discourse#also ive talked abt this before
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lesbiansanemi · 4 months
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I know people have always been weird with fic updates but I swear recently people have been even more impatient and weird about it. I get comments on fics that have been updated WITHIN A MONTH asking if it’s been abandoned or when it’s going to continue. Like…. My guy…. Idk where you’re from that fics are apparently getting updated like fucking daily but you need to chill
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arsonist-chicken · 3 months
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btw in absolutely unsurprising news I fucked up the exam of that class I'm taking for the third time badly again.
in very surprising news, apparently Something happened, idk if the dean said something to the professor or I looked like a distressed broken down wet rat enough or he just doesn't want to see me in his class again or idk, maybe it's not good for him if someone fails his class three times, but he actually offered that I could do a written exam on friday instead? which. is extremely surprising. good, because it gives me another afternoon to study and I can draw and go back to questions on a written exam, even if I have to shuffle around the other exams and papers now, just. very surprising.
#lol but next semester is the fucking seminar again with also the same professor#idk how you can teach such shitty classes regularly and never think hmmm maybe i should change something#with the amount of people having to take the classes at least twice#anyway good for me i'll keep crying over uni the rest of the week and the weekend too and then i'll do stuff next week#like i need to call my insurance and annoy them in person until they say yes to any therapist who will have me#and call the other thing#and oh i really need to find a different GP because i'm soundly back at the stage of where i can literally not think two sentences#after each other without trailing off or it taking up extremely much energy just to remember which store i wanted to go to#and i'm aware that stress and mental illness causes brain fog or whatever#but i've been stressed before but this only started last autumn and i need a different doctor to look at it#who won't just say oh it's just iron levels#there's something wrong with my brain and i need someone competent who actually cares to look at it and tell me#if therapy will fix this or if it's a physical problem#please let it be just brain fog htat therapy can fix i don't have time for this#i just want to sleep and cry until this bs is over but semester break starts next week but i still have exams then and a whle list of#stuff to do for uni still plus stuff otuside. like a doctor. and sleep a normal amount instead of in weird horu intervals on my desk and in#my clothes on my bed or floor or wherever i am at the moment my brain decides it's over now#also friends. i wanted to catch up. also a job. like. yeah i need a job even if idk how i'll do uni and a job with the way my brain is righ#now#huh. oh i have another exam in half an hour. send help i don't want to go to uni anymore#mine#still don't know what that class or the seminar next semester are about btw but we moce#*move#goddamn it I'm TIRED and not just in the physical sense#i'm so goddamn done with uni and insurances deciding about psychotherapy and the general state of the world and cost of living#and i miss my friends and i want to visit them but nither them nor me have time and travelling is expensive#and ijust want a goddamn fucking break but i don't see one comign anytime soon. not before summer#but probably not even then#and after that i'll start working so like#at least no goddamn seminars anymore but i still absolutely dread having to decide where i want to work a
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curiosity-killed · 6 months
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My sister has this thing where she like…loathes my childhood self ?? which. Feels a little unhinged. but leads to things like her being like “omg you STOLE so many baby dolls and because I was a Good and Rule Abiding Child, I was APPALLED and you were TOTALLY REMORSELESS” and I was like. 1 yr old when this happened.
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bowtiepastabitch · 5 months
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I think perhaps my hottest fanfic take is that unless the fic is either a)really fucking intrigueing otherwise or b)reced/written by a mutual, I will immediately close the tab if I see Newton Pulsifer on the character list
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