#loner castiel

[goldenraeofsun]

Day 4: Wicked

Castiel keeps his longing for Dean Winchester, quarterback and last year’s junior prom king, the ultimate secret of his high school years. It's not hard; he doesn’t have many (any) friends. 

At lunch, he sits at what he dubs as the “miscellaneous” table with the girl with the heavy eyeliner and combat boots, the boy with his trick deck of cards and actual top hat, and the freshman who always has their nose buried in a textbook.

After school, Castiel has homework, music lessons, cross country, and chess tutoring. Evenings not spent on extracurriculars are for his parents’ galas, auctions, and other fundraising events for their arts charity.

Dean would have graduated without ever saying one word to Castiel – except Anna Milton breaks her arm two weeks after school starts. Three days later, Castiel twists his ankle, marking the end of his senior year athletic ambitions.

As he hobbles away from his locker, he overhears Dean lamenting that they can’t find anyone to run tech after Anna’s accident.

Castiel gets the job before the school day is over.

* * *

Dean is magnificent as Harold Hill. He may have auditioned on a highly popularized dare from another football player, but he was born for the stage. His whole body lights up on the stage, and his impeccable comedic timing makes Castiel smile, even when he doesn’t get the joke.

Rehearsals quickly become Castiel’s favorite parts of his day. The stage manager, Charlie, seems determined to bring him into the theater fold and makes smalltalk about which video games and movies Castiel must try in his nonexistent free time.

Cas suspects she talks to him out of pity, but he can’t find the willpower to reject her. He has his pride – what teenager doesn’t – but not when it comes to his people skills.

The week before dress rehearsals, his chess tutor catches a cold, and Castiel finally finds an hour to read the first chapters of The Hobbit. 

“You finally read it?” Charlie demands, a manic glee in her eye. She grabs his upper arm as if afraid he’s going to bolt from the conversation he started less than a minute ago. 

Castiel nods. “I started it on Tuesday,”

“That’s awesome.” She punches the air triumphantly. “Count another one for Team Tolkien.”

“I haven’t finished it yet.”

“You will,” Charlie promises – or threatens?

“I like it so far,” Castiel says truthfully because he wouldn’t say anything else to her face. 

“Good,“ Charlie says firmly. In a loud voice she calls, “Hey, Winchester!”

Castiel freezes.

Charlie yells, “Even Novak beat you to The Hobbit!”

From behind them, Dean’s voice comes, “I told you, I’m gonna get to it!”

Charlie shakes her head, telling Castiel in a carrying stage-whisper, “He’s been saying that for years. I honestly figured he couldn’t read and didn’t want to admit it.”

Dean makes a sputtering noise of offense. “What the hell? I can fucking read, Bradbury!”

Their drama teacher, Mrs. Chandler, barks, “Language!”

Charlie snorts, raising her hand to slightly muffle her giggles. “If Mrs. C is back from her smoke break, I’d better get going.”

To Castiel’s surprise, Charlie doesn’t drop The Hobbit until he finishes it. With her (increasingly fervid) urging, he carves out time during study halls, in between scenes, and in the back seat of their driver’s car on the way to school. 

“Why do you want me to read it so badly?” Castiel asks when he only has a few chapters left, tilting his head as he studies her response. 

“Other than the fact that it’s one of the best books ever written?” Charlie asks, her eyebrows rising.

“The beginning was a little dry.”

“Well, I never!” Charlie clutches her heart before she cracks a smile. “Yeah, I know.” She shrugs. “But it changed my life, and, I dunno,” she shakes her head, “I keep hoping it’ll do the same to someone else.”

Castiel sits up straighter in his chair. “I’d say it has.”

“Yeah?”

Castiel nods at the first friend he made in high school, three months into his senior year. “Of course, it has.”

* * *

The week of the performances, everyone is jumpy and on edge. Even Castiel gets swept up in the nerves, suffering through nightmares when he flubs all his lighting cues and forgets his pants.

On Tuesday – their opening night is Friday – Castiel stays behind after rehearsal to run through the lighting again one last time. Satisfied, he gathers his things and exits the tech booth, frowning as his ears catch a melody of strummed strings coming from backstage.

Castiel follows the sound to the green room to find Dean, crouched over a guitar, a songbook open in front of him. But he doesn’t recognize the chords.

“Could be, who knows,” Dean croons. “There’s something due any day, I will know right away, soon as it shows.”

Definitely not from The Music Man.

“It may come cannonballing down through the sky,” Dean sings in a rush, “gleam in its eye, bright as a – a fuck.” Dean blows a raspberry, his lips pursed, brow furrowed, as he traces a finger along the musical bars on the page.

Castiel makes an involuntary noise, and Dean whirls around. “Cas!”

Caught, Castiel coughs to dislodge the lump of nerves from his throat. “Hello, Dean.”

“What’re you doing here?” Dean asks, his expression apprehensive.

“I was running the cues one last time before heading home.”

Dean nods, his fingers tapping against the neck of his guitar, clearly uncomfortable. But, somehow, Dean’s unease puts Castiel more at ease. He takes a step further into the greenroom instead of hovering on the threshold. “You sound… nice.”

Dean laughs humorlessly. “I have no idea what I’m doing, but thanks.”

Before this moment, Castiel never would have thought Dean suffered from anything so mundane as nerves or low self-esteem

“West Side Story?” Castiel asks, peering over Dean’s shoulder to the songbook.

Dean waits a beat, but when whatever he is expecting doesn’t come, he says, “We’re reading Romeo and Juliet in English, and apparently this is just that with music and gangs, so… anyway, it’s stupid.” He raises his eyebrows. “You know West Side Story but not World of Warcraft?”

Cas blinks, surprised that Dean knew anything about him other than his name and his role backstage. “How did you know that?”

“Charlie,” Dean says with a smirk. After a beat, he ventures, “Have you seen it? West Side Story?”

Castiel shakes his head. The last revival only lasted a year and a half. “My parents never found the time to go while it was still playing.” They aren’t that far away, though, over the river in New Jersey.

“What’s your favorite?”

Castiel pauses. “I liked Rent,” he says, “Mother thought it was too loud, but that’s what the music deserved, what the characters deserved, after being ignored and overlooked for so long.”

“I have no idea what it’s about,” Dean says, sounding intrigued.

Castiel clamps his mouth shut. If any team member of the football team but Dean Winchester had gotten cast in the fall musical, the bullying would have been relentless. As it is, Castiel still sometimes catches slurs being tossed his way by the more homophobic members of their class. Dean laughs them off.

Castiel’s explanation dies on his tongue. Instead, he says awkwardly, “It’s… good.” 

Dean studies him. “How come you never tried out for any of this theater crap?”

“I can’t sing,” Castiel confesses.

“Seriously?”

“I mean, I can,” Castiel corrects as his mother’s constant reminders to pay attention to details (semantics) ring in his ears, “but nobody who values their ears would willingly listen.”

Dean laughs, a sound Castiel will treasure forever. “Dude, you can’t be that bad.”

“Trust me, I am,” Castiel says eagerly. “There’s a reason I joined the orchestra instead of the choir.”

“Could I get a demo?” Dean asks, grinning.

Castiel draws up short. “Absolutely not.”

Dean laughs again, and maybe Castiel fell asleep in the lighting booth and any second now Mrs. Tate will come rushing in and remind him of a Calculus exam he should be taking right now.

To change the subject, he asks Dean, a tad desperately, “Have you seen a Broadway show recently?”

Dean grimaces. “Aren’t tickets expensive?”

Castiel frowns. They might be – he has no idea. “Probably,” he agrees, his shoulders slumping. 

Dean gets to his feet, casting his gaze anywhere but at Castiel. “Listen,” he says in a low voice, “thanks for… thanks.”

* * *

Castiel arrives two hours before curtain on Sunday, the last night of the musical. Heart in his throat, hands almost shaking with nerves, he leaves the flowers and envelope with two tickets to Rock of Ages on Dean’s chair. He adds a note, Musicals are for everyone.

Practically every senior knows Dean loved music from the 80s. Whenever it was his turn to choose the warm up music for football practice, he opted for Styx, Bob Seger, or Def Leppard. 

Castiel might not know pop culture, but he does know Dean Winchester.

Castiel doesn’t sign the card, so he doesn’t expect Dean to invite him along. In fact, he avoids Dean for the rest of the school year. If Dean can’t find him, he can’t reject him. Castiel is fully aware his logic holds water like a sieve, but he can’t bring himself to care.

The day on the tickets comes and goes, and Castiel breathes a sigh of relief (and disappointment).

* * *

Charlie 7:20 Heyyy best friend! I scored last minute tickets to NY Comic Con this weekend You up to dinner and a show on Wednesday?

Castiel 7:20 Of course. It’s been too long since you’ve been back on the East Coast.

Charlie 7:21 Good cause I already got tickets to Wicked 7pm b there or b square

Castiel laughs as he slips his phone back into his pocket. He had expected his friendship with Charlie to fade once they separated for college, but Charlie had the singular talent of being just as present, just as herself, online as in-person.

Still, Castiel obviously prefers the three or four times a year he gets to see her “IRL”.

* * *

“So,” Charlie says as they take their seats in the Gershwin Theatre, “are you going to the reunion next year?”

Castiel shakes his head. “I don’t really see much of a point.”

“C’mon, it’s ten years,” Charlie wheedles. “You don’t want to see who went bald or had a dozen kids?”

“That would be very impressive,” Castiel says as he idly skims the playbill. “Statistically speaking, twins are still a relatively rare occurrence. And to have that many children in nine years would mean multiples.”

“So that’s a yes?” As Castiel shakes his head ‘no’, Charlie pouts. “You’re no fun at all.”

Castiel flips a page. “It’s been said before.”

She huffs, crossing her arms over her chest, “I’ll get you there one way or another.”

“Unless you’re talking about kidnapping, I’m not sure how you’ll accomplish that.”

“I have my ways,” Charlie says loftily. “Have you seen Wicked before?”

“Years ago.”

“Good,” Charlie says, “You’re not doing anything after this, right?”

He turns to her quizzically. She’s well aware of his perennial lack of plans. “Other than going home and sleeping?” 

“Awesome,” Charlie says as the lights dim around them and chatter dies down.

The curtain rises and the first “Good news… she’s dead!” rings out from the stage.

Castiel leans in close to Charlie. “What are you planning?” he demands in an undertone.

She doesn’t turn her head away from the stage. “Shh! It’s starting.”

Castiel settles back in his seat and tries to immerse himself in the performance. They sail through The Wizard and I and What is This Feeling? Elphaba’s singing is slightly better than her acting, and Glinda adds a few too many runs to her solos.

But then Fiyero makes his big entrance before launching into his big number, Dancing Through Life, and –

“Charlie,” Castiel hisses.

“I know, right?” Charlie whispers back, beaming up at the stage. “He started this month!”

And he might as well be back in high school, since Castiel has eyes only for Dean Winchester for the rest of the show.

* * *

Charlie drags Castiel to the stage door to wait with the rest of the tourists for the actors’ autographs.

Dean emerges with Elphaba and Nessa, wearing a leather jacket to ward off the autumn chill and worn jeans.

“Hey, Dean!” Charlie shouts, waving with her whole body.

Castiel winces at her sheer volume.

Dean turns and does a double-take at Castiel. “Hey!” he says warmly. He holds up one finger and turns to the waiting crowd of admirers. He signs all the playbills shoved in his face, making smalltalk with anyone brave enough to strike up a conversation. But, all too soon, he makes his way over to Charlie and Castiel by the curb.

“Hey,” he says, leaning in to hug Charlie and, after a split second of hesitation, Castiel too. “So glad you made it.”

“Of course,” Charlie scoffs. “Like I’d miss it. Is it too late for a drink, Dean?”

“Nope,” Dean says easily. He turns to Castiel. “How about you, Cas?”

Castiel can only shake his head.

“Alright, Broadway Boy, where should we go?” Charlie asks.

“Don’t call me that.” Dean shudders. He points down the street, and they start walking. “That makes me sound like the lamest sidekick ever.”

“Kinda,” Charlie agrees, punching Dean in the shoulder. “But you’ll only ever be my handmaiden.”

Dean rolls his eyes. “Are you ever gonna let me live that down?”

“Nope,” Charlie says cheerfully.

Dean turns to Castiel. “It was an off-Broadway experimental performance,” he explains with a grimace. “There were robots. And tentacles,” he pauses for dramatic effect, “in space.”

Charlie cackles. “It was awesome.”

They cross the street, and Dean pushes open the door to a homey-looking dive bar. It’s relatively empty this late on a Wednesday night. They order their first round at the bar, and pick a table near the front window to catch up.

But, practically as they sit down, Charlie bounds to her feet. “Little girl’s room,” she says by way of explanation, completely ignoring the look of extreme panic that Castiel shoots her over Dean’s head. “Don’t get trashed without me!”

“No promises,” Dean says with a grin as he waves her off. “So,” he starts once they’re alone. He taps his fingers against the side of his beer, and Castiel’s riot of nerves calms a little at Dean’s fidgeting. “How’ve you been?”

“Good and you?”

Dean snorts. “Not bad,” he says, raising his drink to his lips. 

Castiel mentally scrambles for something, anything, to talk about. “Is this your first Broadway role? Charlie mentioned you started only recently.”

Dean nods in agreement. “Finally popped my Broadway cherry on the 2nd.”

“Congratulations.”

They each take a long pull of their drinks. Castiel tries not to stare too intently at Dean’s face.

Dean sets his glass down with slightly more force than necessary, foam splashing out over the side. “Look,” he says, reaching behind him for his wallet.

Oh no. How in the world has Castiel driven off Dean so quickly? He’d thought his people skills, never the best, had gotten better since high school.

But Dean stays seated as he flips his wallet open and pulls out two old, familiar Broadway tickets. “I just wanted to tell you that you changed my life with these,” Dean says seriously, meeting Castiel’s gaze.

Castiel swallows, and he has to take another sip of beer to get his throat working again. “I’m glad,” he says. He reaches out to touch them, his fingers hovering a hairsbreadth above the paper, creased and fragile from ten years of handling.

Dean pushes them closer, and Castiel dares to pick them up, running the pad of his thumb along the half-faded barcode stamped on the side.

“You were amazing, even in high school,” Castiel says quietly. “You deserved to see all the possibilities open to you.”

“What? No,” Dean says, and Castiel’s eyes snap from the tickets to Dean’s face. “I was already saving up to play hookey and line up for same-day tickets.”

Castiel’s mouth thins. “I’m glad I saved you one day as a truant and the extra cost.”

Dean shakes his head. “’M not saying it right,” he says, frustrated. “It’s – Cas, it wasn’t about the show.”

Castiel is completely lost. “Okay?” he says. “I hope you at least enjoyed it –”

“Of course, I did,” Dean cuts him off, irritated. “Fuck it,” he mutters as he stares down at his beer. He raises his head. “It’s that you gave them to me.”

Castiel blinks. “I don’t understand.”

“For some fuckin’ reason, you saw this kid who didn’t know an arpeggio from an archipelago, and thought he could make it on Broadway based on one dinky high school production of The Music Man.” He taps the tickets still in Castiel’s hand, leaning in. “That’s why I kept these close – because they showed that you believed in me.”

Castiel looks up, and Dean’s face hovers much closer than he remembers. “Oh,” he breathes. 

Dean bites his lip, and every nerve in Castiel’s body thrums with anticipation the longer they stay there, not moving, sharing the same air.

“So sorry, they were cleaning out the bathrooms –”

The moment shatters with Charlie’s arrival. 

But, for once, Castiel isn’t going to let it go without a fight. He grabs Dean by the lapels of his flannel and seals their mouths together.

Dean makes a noise of surprise but doesn’t pull away. He reaches up to cup Castiel’s jaw, and his little hum of satisfaction rings ten times sweeter than any love song Castiel has ever heard him sing.

#suptober22 #destiel #fanfic #destiel fanfic #reunion #high school au #musician dean #actor dean #charlie & castiel friendship #rae writes fic #jock dean #popular dean #loner castiel

[rewatching-sam-and-dean]

Random Musings on Sam and Dean: Relationships and Hunting

There is something about Sam starting out the series as the one with friends, and Dean being this loner who essentially tells him he shouldn’t even try to have relationships with other people when they are hunters. Dean sees his immediate family and hunting as the absolute most important things, and everyone else are outsiders.

Some of these things sort of stay the same over the course of the show, but others change in a pretty significant way.

Random, not super well-organized, and potentially off-base, thoughts under the cut. (If anyone actually reads this, please feel free to weigh in.)

Then, as the series goes on, Sam loses or let’s go of almost all of his relationships, until he has pretty much only Dean. He’s afraid to truly get close to anyone out of fear they will be hurt … except for Dean, who is already embedded too deeply in his heart to cut out.

Meanwhile, “Loner” Dean is collecting friends, or extended “family”. Yet, he still doesn’t want them around most of the time, seeming happiest when it’s just him and Sam, with Castiel and Bobby as tolerated/appreciated additions to the family, yet not quite full-family. I’m not including Jack here because no one will ever convince me that Dean fully let him in (and this isn’t a criticism).

The relationships differences between Sam and Dean are like an extension of how they fit into hunting.

Sam befriended normies in the past, but doesn’t fully connect with many new characters out of fear of losing them, while Dean befriends hunters and the supernatural adjacent. There is something about this … like, Dean fits the hunter life in a way Sam doesn’t, even in terms of relationships or how those in the hunting life relate to Dean vs Sam. I’m not saying Dean always likes hunting, or that he bares his soul to everyone he calls friend/family, but he fits it, even socially, better than Sam (and Dean isn’t even that friendly). Sam, with just a very few exceptions, doesn’t make himself at home in the hunting life, including not opening himself up to the people they meet… at least until much later in the series (if then). It’s like he’s afraid to fully live or engage as a hunter in some ways. This is like him refusing to see the bunker as a home until long after Dean has already thoroughly nested there.

Even Sam’s reactions to the hunting life are never quite proportionate, they are often too big (Demon blood, saving Dean from the MOC and risking literally everyone else) or too little (running when he loses Dean Season 7/8). Sam is the Goldilocks of hunting, except I don’t think he ever finds “just right.” And this doesn’t mean he isn’t good at it, or doesn’t learn to “love it,” but I don’t think it ever quite fits him fully.

Sam got close to Jessica and makes friends at Stamford, but he had fully turned his back on hunting at the time. Sam gets close to Amelia, but it’s because he’s running from hunting (and losing Dean). The only time he feels really settled in as a hunter (when it’s not a connection to Dean) is when he’s soulless. It’s only when he’s missing a crucial part of himself (or he has a revenge mission) that he fully embraces the life.

Dean, on the other hand, feels like purgatory is pure: kill the bad thing, rinse and repeat. Even when Dean is living with Lisa, he has an eye and ear open for monsters, and can’t fully shut off those instincts. Unlike with Sam, Dean melds life and hunting and family into this co-existing thing that he’s able to settle into. Again, this isn’t all Dean is, and it doesn’t come without personal/emotional/mental consequences, but Dean is a hunter, and he even suggests in Season 14 that he’s content.

Sam, in Season 10, tells Charlie he loves hunting, but he adds the caveat that he wouldn’t do it without his brother. And even getting into the weeds of Dabb era, Sam tells Mary he hunts because his family (Dean) does.

Speaking of Mary, Sam doesn’t even let her fully in. He provides a shoulder for her at times, respects her autonomy, and eve tries to make her proud, but he never fully opens up to her, not like Dean does. And we know how Sam got along with John who trained the boys to hunt .. or, you know, didn’t.

Dean is Sam’s exception. He’s close to Dean even though Dean is associated with hunting, is basically the best hunter. Sam says several times that he hunts because Dean does. He doesn’t get close to anyone in the hunting life, except for Dean. Dean is Sam’s tether into hunting after his revenge quest for Jess and guilt from losing John wear down.

Bear with me on this one, but the long-term, or big characters, associated with the hunting world are largely closer to Dean or exist to hurt Sam. John (Mr. Hunter Parent) was disappointed in Sam’s lack of both commitment to hunting and obedience, and favoured Dean (not that it did him any good). Bobby considers Sam like a son, but Dean is his clear favourite (and Sam rarely turns to Bobby for personal help, if ever). Castiel considers Sam a friend/family, but as an extension of Dean. The angels hate Sam because he’s lucifer’s vessel. Ruby was able to manipulate Sam into embracing his power (and hunting) and was closer to him than Dean, but it was because of his initial grief for Dean that she was able to get in his head. Sam is tormented by the devil himself when he’s in the hunting life. Sam never thaws towards Crowley w who tries to take Dean away when he becomes Dean’s frienemy. Mary (Mrs Hunter Parent) comes back to life and basically ignores Sam out of her own guilt and bonds more with Dean (at least at first). Rowena bonds more with Sam than Dean, but they bond over shared trauma not really hunting (though she does teach him spells, so she’s a bit of an exception). Jack, Sam actually bonds with more than Dean, but it’s over shared “freak” experience, and Jack actually becomes the new god, so while he starts as a part of hunting life, he is actually beyond it.

Even the junior hunter girls are arguably closer to Dean: Krissy, Claire and Charlie. And we have the part-time hunters. Jody is pretty close to both boys, maybe even leaning towards Sam, but she’s a cop as well as a part-time hunter. She isn’t fully in the life. Donna, the other cop and part-time hunter is definitely closer to Dean. So, the rule mostly holds true even for the more minor hunters. Finally, even a lot of the random hunters we meet hate Sam (Gordon, Walt and Roy, Girl in Episode 2 of Season 9, etc).

Anyway, my point with all of this is that there might actually be a reason that so many chracters in the hunter world, or associated with it, are closer to Dean than Sam. And it isn’t just writer favouritism or “Everybody just loves Dean” ( 🤷🏻‍♀️). I mean, it makes sense that chracters are drawn to Dean because he’s got that charm, while Sam tends towards introverted. But it actually makes sense to be more than that within the story. Sam is never quite at home, or settled in, or fits in to the hunter society or hunting world.

And yet, while most chracters are out here preferring Dean, Dean couldn’t care less because Sam is his world. And in return, Dean is Sam’s exception to everything. He stays in hunting for Dean (in the long run). He gives up many of his morals for Dean. He risks damning everyone in the world with the darkness for Dean. He learns to love hunting because it’s part of his life with Dean. And he gives it up again when there is no Dean alive on earth (assuming he quits in the finale).

I know there is more to their relationships than this little summary, and this didn’t cover Deans also complex relationship with hunting and John and Mary, etc., but it just stuck me as interesting how so much of the show truly points to Sam not fitting in the hunting world. It’s almost like he paused his regularly scheduled programming to be with Dean for the rest of Dean’s life, before carrying on.

But the kicker is, even though Sam (seemingly) gets out of hunting, the normal life can no longer fit him either because it doesn’t have his big brother Dean in it.

It is undoubtably sad that Dean dies young, but Sam is also still living out a tragedy at the end of Supernatural.

The fact that we got reunited brothers on that bridge is … everything.

#supernatural #sam winchester #dean winchester #sam and dean #spn meta #my thoughts #hunting life

[kotana-x]

Supernatural + Evangelion

John Winchester appears instead of Gendo Ikari, and the base and plot take place in the USA. In Los Angeles (because it would make sense for angels to fly here). John has two sons with whom he has a difficult relationship. The boys were brought up in strictness, but even the severity of their father could not separate them when the time came for Dean to become a pilot. That's why Sam is always with his brother. He cannot pilot himself, but they made a separate place for him. Sam watches through the rear view cameras (Yes, this Evangelion has such a device).

Dean (14y.o), Sam (10y.o)

Crowley (14y.o) is also a pilot, but a loner. Having been orphaned in early childhood, he decided to live and develop only for his own benefit. Crowley is very observant, so he knows that the organization is doing shady things. Strengths - he is not afraid of pain, but at the same time he is very secretive even in Evangelion. He is able to take the enemy by surprise.

Castiel is a strange, weakly emotional boy who immediately told the Winchesters that he would serve as their armor. It seems that he is 14 years old, but…

Crowley suspected that Castiel was an angel when he heard him singing in the church choir. Further acquaintance only strengthened suspicions.

There is no need to touch the angel, even if you want to provoke him -

There are girls among the pilots too! Here's Meg.

#neon genesis evangelion #spn #supernatural #art #fanart #artwork #castiel supernatural #crowstiel #crowley supernatural #dean and sam #dean winchester #sam winchester #teenagers #sketches

[eggcompany]

Deangasms and Cascorders

Benny gets Dean off for a long time. Dean really just wants to be fucked by Castiel Novak. A phone camera, a big vibrator, and Bad Boy Castiel. Bubba Benny really plays matchmaker

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dean Winchester: Comic geek and movie nerd, Loner, Oversharing expert.

Dean wasn’t known to be a very social person. He kept to himself and his best friend (who had a strange relationship with the Geek) Benny Lafitte. Benny had almost zero in common with Dean. Benny had a sweet southern tang to his voice and had a rough way with people while Dean spoke clearly and purposefully and always backed down from everything and kept out of trouble.

People didn’t really know what went on between Benny and Dean. Benny had a sweet little Hispanic spitfire as a girlfriend named Angelina and Dean had… a right hand. Dean was openly bi, meaning he had a bi pride pin on his backpack. He had been out since fifth grade to Benny and out since freshman year to everyone else.

However no one would have bet that behind closed curtains and with Mrs. Angelina’s permission Benny sometimes ‘helped’ Dean. Dean had once asked Benny to come to his house and help him because he was too embarrassed to go to the hospital when a certain vegetable got...stuck. He’s invested in some toys that cannot get stuck since then though. Sometimes Dean just needs to be topped out of his head. Sometimes he needs to be embarrassed and degraded and told what to do. That’s where Benny fits into the picture.

Benny isn’t attracted to Dean and Dean isn’t attracted to Benny… much. Dean however is very very very interested and even more attracted to one of Benny’s ‘bad boy’ friends. Castiel Novak. Tall, pretty, strong, pretty, mean, snarky, pretty. Castiel had a tongue piercing and his ears done about four times each and an eyebrow ring that always caught Dean’s attention. Castiel was one of the fellas who cursed at the teachers and skipped school all the time. But what really got dean were those perpetually black lined eyes. Gorgeous blue that seemed to shimmer and glow. Yeah Dean was head over heels but he never did anything about it.

The only thing Dean did ever do was rant and bitch at Benny for hours on end about how he loves Cas and how Cas is so hot and how Cas is way out of his league and how he’s sexually frustrated and how he wishes Cas would bend him over a desk. Dean has cried on Benny’s shoulder more times than Benny could ever count because Dean only ever wants Castiel, he doesn’t want silicone.

Benny always helps his friend though. He’s tried talking the dirty blonde into asking the raven haired boy out but Dean is just a big chicken. He’s rough with Dean and always says that if Dean wasn’t such a pussy then he’d already have Castiel.

One day Dean asks Benny to do something irregular for him.

“Will you tell Cas I like him? Hell, you could tell him to come use me for all I care. Just… Please?” Dean said one night while he ate a container of ice cream out of frustration. This sparked an idea for the hick man.

“Of course I will.” Was all Benny told him.

Soon enough that same night Dean begged until Benny had his biggest vibrator cramming against Dean’s prostate. Thing is Benny had set up his phone to record everything that was happening. Everything Dean was saying.

The camera caught the tears rolling down Dean’s face as he cried out loudly. It caught every “FUCK BUBBA HARDER” and every “PLEASE”.

It even caught-“Fuh- fUCK BUBBA!!! Fuck me harder! I need it so bad! Bubba please!”

“Why do you need it Dean? Huh? Why do you need your bubba to screw you over?” Benny said so calmly and clearly as Dean almost thrashed against the bed. Laying face down ass up like some whore.

“Cause- cause Cas wo-won’t do it! Need you to! Need to get used but Cassie won’t- FUCK- won’t do it!” Dean sobbed out. This caused Benny to stop moving the toy completely and just let the violent vibrations sit on Dean’s spot for a moment. Dean screamed into the mattress.

“I know you know that’s not the reason. Why don’t you tell the truth? Why don’t you just say why?” Benny said and didn’t move until Dean shakily said.

“I’m just a dumb whore who doesn’t have the balls to ask Castiel to fuck me full… OH GOD BUBBA PLEASE! I’m a COWARD! GOD I'M A COWARD!” Dean would finish screaming because Benny started moving the toy so that it hit exactly where Dean wanted it to.

“Bubba yes please fast harder wreck my cunt PLEASE Bubba please!” would be the final words said before the recording ended and the final few seconds would be of Dean screaming out into the mattress while cumming hard onto the towel under him. His muscles drew tight and sweat dripping off of him.

Benny put away the toy and went and grabbed his phone. He cut the video down a bit and walked back over to a panting Winchester who was wiping himself down. “Whatcha got there Bubba?” Dean asked as he folded up the Jizz Towel and put in the hamper.

“I got you a one way ticket into Castiel Novak’s pants right here.” Benny answered as he turned the screen toward Dean who watched wide eyed. Dean automatically gave permission to send it before he had a chance to back out.

He went to school that Monday and he had a certain pierced boy pinning him to his locker.

“Winchester. I’ve been lookin for you.” Is all Castiel said before he did something that Dean didn’t expect. Dean thought he would get punches or beat up. Not kissed in the hallway.

They did fuck in the janitor’s closet. And in Castiel's car during lunch. And Dean’s after school. And in Dean’s bedroom that night. And in the shower that morning. Dean got everything he ever wanted! He even learned that Castiel and him actually had some in common and had a good dynamic and relationship.

Benny never heard the end of it after that. He heard every little detail but at least Dean baked him cookies and brownies and so many cookies as a thank you.

#fanfic #egg_company #smut tag #dean winchester loves castiel #dean x castiel #dean winchester #deancas #castiel novak #castiel #castiel supernatural #supernatural fic #supernatural

[qapsiel]

@errantsouls " Cas." Wan, tight-lipped, reflexively wary; a far cry from old. But so, too, have situations changed, and the last they saw of each other wasn't on pleasant terms. " However did you find me? "

                                 "BALTHAZAR." Castiel stops, hands loosely at his side. There's a lot he wants to tell his brother, but finding the right words is hard. "I have heard — rumors. I decided to see if they are true." His eyes flicker to the massive double door and the sigils that keep him out; him and every other angel who would want to pay Balthazar a visit. In a way, they're both loners from their own species. "May I come in?"

#errantsouls #errantsouls: balthazar #(I have no idea when this is except post season 6 lmao) #(and I assume Balthi is still the rich bachelor dude that Steve met) #( v: undetermined )

[french-vanilla-in-the-clouds]

˗ˏˋ 𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐍𝐄 𝐂𝐄𝐋𝐄𝐁𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍! ´ˎ˗

𝐡𝐞𝐲! 𝐢 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐡𝐢𝐭 𝟏𝟎𝟎𝟎 𝐟𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐬! 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐤𝐬 𝐚 𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐠𝐮𝐲𝐬! 𝐢'𝐦 𝐠𝐥𝐚𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐧𝐨 𝐨𝐧𝐞'𝐬 𝐣𝐮𝐦𝐩𝐞𝐝 𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩 𝐪𝐮𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐲𝐞𝐭. 𝐚𝐥𝐬𝐨, *𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐞!* 𝐢 𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧 𝟐𝟎 𝐨𝐧 𝐝𝐞𝐜𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐡, 𝐬𝐨 𝐢 𝐟𝐢𝐠𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐢'𝐥𝐥 𝐝𝐨 𝐢𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐜𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐭𝐡 𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬! (𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐨𝐧𝐞, 𝐨𝐟 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞!)

𝐩𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐜! 𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐨 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦𝐞 -- 𝐚 𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐚𝐥𝐛𝐮𝐦 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐚 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐲 𝐟𝐚𝐯𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮. 𝐩𝐮𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐗 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐚𝐫 --- 𝐢 𝐜𝐚𝐧'𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐢𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐲𝐨𝐮!

- 𝕱𝖗𝖆𝖓𝖈𝖊𝖘𝖈𝖆! ♡

˗ˏˋ 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐘 𝐅𝐀𝐕𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐒! ´ˎ˗

"𝒂 𝒎𝒐𝒎𝒆𝒏𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖'𝒍𝒍 𝒏𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒓𝒆𝒎𝒆𝒎𝒃𝒆𝒓 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒂 𝒏𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖'𝒍𝒍 𝒏𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒇𝒐𝒓𝒈𝒆𝒕..."

➹ 𝖓𝖎𝖓𝖊 𝖎𝖓 𝖙𝖍𝖊 𝖆𝖋𝖙𝖊𝖗𝖓𝖔𝖔𝖓! send me the name of a character plus a timestamp and I'll write a short blurb for you! (ex- castiel, 2:30 am)

➹ 𝖎 𝖜𝖗𝖎𝖙𝖊 𝖘𝖎𝖓𝖘 𝖓𝖔𝖙 𝖙𝖗𝖆𝖌𝖊𝖉𝖎𝖊𝖘! write a short letter to a character and I’ll send you their response! (ex - dear sherlock, I miss you…) - please don’t write anything longer than 100 words!

➹ 𝖙𝖍𝖊 𝖇𝖆𝖑𝖑𝖆𝖉 𝖔𝖋 𝖒𝖔𝖓𝖆 𝖑𝖎𝖘𝖆! I’ll give you three p!atd songs and a music video based on your blog’s theme! (if you’re an anon, give me a few fun facts about yourself!)

➹ 𝖌𝖎𝖗𝖑 𝖙𝖍𝖆𝖙 𝖞𝖔𝖚 𝖑𝖔𝖛𝖊! For my gorgeous, gorgeous moots, I’ll be sending off handwritten notes! xxx

➹ 𝖉𝖊𝖆𝖙𝖍 𝖔𝖋 𝖆 𝖇𝖆𝖈𝖍𝖊𝖑𝖔𝖗! Let me ship you with one of my random crushes! I’ll whip out a beloved from my collection. Just tell me a bit about yourself!   

➹ 𝖉𝖆𝖓𝖈𝖎𝖓𝖌𝖘 𝖓𝖔𝖙 𝖆 𝖈𝖗𝖎𝖒𝖊! Send me a few songs you think I’d like! 

➹ 𝖘𝖚𝖌𝖆𝖗 𝖘𝖔𝖆𝖐𝖊𝖗! send me the name of a character or celeb and your aesthetic - I’ll make you a mood board! - open for all fandoms! - even those I don’t write for! (ex: cottage core, loki?)

➸ ➸ 𝖗𝖔𝖆𝖗𝖎𝖓𝖌 𝟐𝟎'𝐬! ➸ ➸  It’s my birthday soon, so send me questions you’re curious about! 

˗ˏˋ 𝐑𝐔𝐋𝐄𝐒! ´ˎ˗​

"𝒓𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕 𝒏𝒐𝒘 𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒇𝒖𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒆'𝒔 𝒄𝒆𝒓𝒕𝒂𝒊𝒏, 𝒊 𝒘𝒐𝒏'𝒕 𝒍𝒆𝒕 𝒊𝒕 𝒇𝒂𝒅𝒆 𝒂𝒘𝒂𝒚..."

➹ only one event per ask, please! but you can totally request more than one party favour!!! <3

➹ be sure to add the title of the party favour before sending anything in. Just so I can keep track! (ex - 𝖓𝖎𝖓𝖊 𝖎𝖓 𝖙𝖍𝖊 𝖆𝖋𝖙𝖊𝖗𝖓𝖔𝖔𝖓! - let’s do... sam and dean, 11:30 am) :)

➹ You can find a list of fandoms and characters I write for HERE. Refer to this if you’re requesting a blurb or letter. Mood boards are open to all fandoms and celebs!

➹ I’ll leave submissions open for the next while a few updates here and there. I’ll start sending out posts from December 20th - December 31st!!! Thanks so much for participating!!!!! Again, I just want to say how much I appreciate you all!!! Much love!!! <3

➹  tagging a few lovely moots!!! you’re all so wonderful, and I’m so grateful that I get to interact with you all!!! <333 : @goldencherriess @starstruck-loner @waiting-for-cas-to-save-me @lumosouls @thespiritoflife @thatawkwardlittlefangirl @classickook @astudyinlaura @baby-bloos @natti-ice @misaverawrites @lucywrites02 @bakerstreethound @frostandflamesfanfic @aephereal @starryeddie @foxmulderlovebot @andthevillainshallrises​

➹ 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐝𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐛𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐥𝐲 @animatedglittergraphics-n-more​

#french vanilla's roaring 20's #birthday bash and 1k milestone #panic! at the disco #brendon urie #sherlock fanfiction #supernatural fanfiction #marvel fanfiction #The x-files fanfiction #sherlock x reader #castiel x reader #sam winchester x reader #dean winchester x reader #stephen strange x reader #fox mulder x reader

[castiddies]

💖 fic recs !! 💖

just sharing my fav fics that i read in the last 6 months :)

where living doesn't feel like falling by februyuri - 39k | E |

The year is 2002 and Castiel is a part-time student, full-time gas station sales associate living in Rexford, Idaho. One day, a handsome young man in a black Chevrolet drops by the Gas-N-Sip and changes his life forever.

Castle on a Cloud by whelvenwings - 122k | E |

Dean Winchester has his whole life planned out. Becoming a warrior is all he’s ever dreamed about, since he was tiny - saving people, hunting monsters; quests and deeds and swords and glory. He’s done his training and he’s ready to become a Savaşçı, a knight of the realm. All that stands in his way is the Vigil, a night-long contemplation of his past and future in the chapel just outside the city walls. The only rules: no eating, no speaking, and no opening the door. Easy, right? Very easy. Until there’s a knocking, and a voice from outside that pleads for his help… So begins Dean’s journey, and his path will take him far - across the desert, through the forests, over the mountains and beyond. But his mysterious blue-eyed companion is keeping secrets, and Dean has a few of his own. Will he be able to let go of his fear before they come to the Castle on a Cloud?

the cheapest room in the house by biggaybenny - 89k | E |

what if instead of a very sincere and earnest love confession dean just found out cas was gay? no confession, no god-jack endgame. just post-s15 stupidity. just dean being deranged. the dean downloads grindr for cas fic

the origin of love by dothraki_shieldmaiden - 121k | E |

Having a soulmate isn't always a good thing. Castiel Novak knew, from the age of four, that he had a soulmate. He could feel every bit of pain that his soulmate experienced--every injury, every hurt, every disappointment his soulmate suffered, he felt. By the time he's eighteen, Castiel has felt the pain beyond his imagining, and he's left with the simple question: why does his soulmate hate him so? Dean Winchester never wanted a soulmate. He grew up watching how the loss of his soulmate destroyed his father. Unfortunately, when he's four years old, he finds himself saddled with one. He spends his teenage years desperate to deny even the smallest comfort from his soulmate. When tragedy strikes, Castiel sets off on a mission of revenge that will send his life crashing into Dean's. Determined to defy fate, the two separate, only to come back together, only to separate again. But when a demon deal threatens not only Dean's life but Castiel's, the two have to connect in order to save each other, themselves, and maybe, while they're at it, the world.

Roll With It by saltnhalo - 73k | E |

For two years, Dean’s been slaving away beneath his boss – many label him a secretary, but he fucking hates that and feels like it only applies to someone wearing a pencil skirt, so he insists on his title of Executive Assistant. And for what? In the vain hope that one day he’ll manage to become an editor for Sandover Publishing, and that he’ll see the manuscript that he’s slaved over since college finally realized in print. That’s the dream, anyway. Right now, he’s fucking late. Dean wants to be an editor. Castiel just wants to stay in the country. ‘The Proposal’ – as you’ve never seen it before.

It's The End of the World (As We Know It) by tiamatv - 139k | M |

The year is 1996, and Dean’s stuck in Kankakee, Illinois while Dad’s on a long-haul hunt. It’s not too bad. He’s even got a friend, now—even if Cas is a weird, gawky loner kid who gets way too intense about his sci-fi novels and doesn’t know how to stop staring. Just business as usual. Until his dad comes back, and it isn’t. The year is 2011, and the shadows known as ‘angels’ and ‘demons’ are falling from cracks in the sky, raining death, destruction, and monsters where they pass. When the Joint Task Force asks for their help in stopping the end of the world—John Winchester, his sons, and a ragtag band of hunters—well, that’s just business as usual, too. Until Dean meets the cold blue eyes of their team liaison—Dr. Castiel Novak.

carving deep blue ripples by dothraki_shieldmaiden - 85k | E |

With his little brother at Stanford and his father searching out leads on the monster that killed his mother, Dean Winchester is left to hunt alone. It's fun, except in the ways that it really blows. Things start to turn around when he meets Castiel Novak, another hunter. Castiel is aloof and maybe a little too sarcastic, but he's good backup (and pretty easy on the eyes. Not that Dean's looking or anything). After a few hunts, Dean is willing to make his and Castiel's partnership permanent (and he's not exactly averse to adding another component to their partnership either. After all, he's caught Castiel looking at him just as many times as Castiel's caught him looking). But Castiel is hiding a secret, and it's so explosive that it threatens to not only tear them apart, but also tear apart everything Dean believes in.

Heavyweight by emmbrancsxx0, valleydean (emmbrancsxx0) - 206k | E |

Brooklyn, 1927. The Golden Age of Boxing. Two years ago, light heavyweight champion Dean Winchester and heavyweight champion Castiel Novak had a secret affair. After a scandal tarnished Cas’ name and stripped him of his title, the two parted ways. Now, with a heavyweight tournament on the horizon, Dean aims to up his weight class so he can compete for the title. He finds unexpected competition when Cas comes out of retirement and returns to New York to fix his reputation. Upon their reunion, the two contenders learn that, outside of the ring, some bruises never really heal.

And This, Your Living Kiss by opal_bullets - 60k | M |

Only a very few people in the world know that the celebrated and reclusive poet Jack Allen is just Kansas mechanic Dean Winchester, a high school dropout with a few bucks to his name. Not that it matters anymore; life has left him so wrung out he never wants to pick up another pen. Until, that is, a string of coincidences leads Dean to auditing a poetry course with one Dr. Castiel Novak. The professor is wildly intelligent, devastatingly handsome...and just so happens to be academia's foremost expert on the poetry of Jack Allen.

Right Where You Left Me by outdean - 93k | E |

Ten years after the empty swallows Cas up, it spits him right back out—but a lot can change in a decade. OR The "Cas comes back from the empty to find that Dean is married" fic.

Hidden Language by chevrolangels - 60k | E |

Las Alas Academy. A formidable-looking place, all brick building and ivy climbing the walls, nestled in the heart of the city. To be accepted is a pipe dream, to succeed is a miracle. When Naomi Alas left the National Ballet, amidst much gossip and whispered rumors, she walked out with her head held high, and started her own school the next year. Within five years it was one of the most prestigious names in the country, hell—any kid with a pair of ballet shoes and a teacher worth their salt instilled in them the hope of one day walking the hallowed halls of Alas. So why was Dean here again? Castiel supposes life could be a lot worse. He’s finally got out of ballet, he hasn’t got kicked out of his apartment yet, and oh, yeah—he’s got a competition coming up that’s his entire future on a plate. The last thing he needs is a distraction.

for the love of a triangle by dothraki_shieldmaiden - 75k | E |

She’s seventeen years old, with the world in the palm of her hands, but she wants more. Cassie Robinson is hungry, the kind of hungry with teeth, the kind of hungry that hunts down life like a pack of wolves, and she won’t stop until she gets everything. OR Dean, Cassie, and Castiel meet at college and fall in love.

#idk if anyone is interested but #fic recs #i need to read more canon fics lmao #destiel

[wanderingcas]

going through old documents, found an "attack on titan" destiel au that i wrote a little while back for @aerodaltonimperial. thought i'd post it somewhere!

Dean first saw Castiel Novak on his third day as a recruit of the 104th Cadet Corps.

Every one of the freshly new recruits were getting trained on the mobility gear apparatus—for flying through the air with cables, and having more of a chance fighting the Titans, apparently. Having seen a Titan up close and personal, the damage and carnage it could cause, Dean had serious doubts whether flying through the air in a thing like that would do anything against those giant dumb monsters.

But seeing Castiel training on the apparatus, his legs and arms delicately balanced while being suspended by the wires, his jet-black hair catching the sunlight as he gracefully hung in the air—Dean could only stare, stunned, and feel for the first time that they had some sort of hope against the monsters that stalked the walls.

After that, Dean seemed to notice Castiel everywhere.

It made no sense that he did; they were polar opposites. Where Dean had a group of new friends he ate with in the mess hall, Castiel ate dinner by himself. Dean was mouthy to his superiors during his training sessions—it was a motivational technique for himself, to defy authority—while Castiel sweat through each of the drill rounds without complaint or any signs of slowing down. 

Dean was loud, brash, flirty—Castiel was moody, and Dean heard him say all of two words in the first two weeks they were there (a “thank you” to one of the people serving them food in the mess hall).

Dean kept trying to talk to him on the training field, but all he got was a glare. Dean wasn’t sure why he wanted to break Castiel’s mysterious exterior, figure out what his deal was—maybe because the more walls that went up, the more Dean wanted to knock them down.

A month into their training, Dean and Castiel were assigned to each other for a sparring session. Castiel slammed Dean onto the ground in a few short moves, their chests heaving together from the effort, and Dean discovered that he didn’t even mind losing.

“You sure you’ve been here as long as me?” Dean joked as Castiel helped him up from the ground. “You seem more advanced than the rest of us.” 

Castiel’s face was blank when he replied, “I picked things up all along the way.” 

Dean watched Castiel’s back as he walked away, then went back into the starting position with his fists raised. “So what’s your deal, anyway?” Dean asked. “Nobody even knows where you’re from.” 

“Will that help you win this fight?” Castiel bent his legs as if to spring forward.

Running a hand through his sweaty hair, Dean admitted, “Well, no.” 

“Then I don’t see how it’s relevant.” Without warning, Castiel pounced at him, Dean held up his arms to defend Castiel’s blows, and they once again began circling each other in the combat ring.

Castiel started hanging out with a girl called Meg—another loner among the recruits. Dean tried not to be jealous of her getting all of Castiel’s secret smiles. They were the most insular pair in the training camp, murmuring to each other whenever they hung out at the mess hall.

“I’m going to make that guy my friend,” Dean told Charlie, “if it’s the last goddamn thing I do.” 

“Careful, Winchester, or I’d think you’re developing a crush,” Charlie teased him with a small jab of her elbow to his side.

“Am not,” Dean grumbled, pushing her away.

Benny leaned over the table “Wait, are you talking about Novak?” At Dean’s nod, Benny whistled low through his teeth. “You know that guy is crazy, right? I heard he killed a guy before coming here, and they were going to put him in jail, but forced him to do this training to become a Scout instead.” 

“No, you got it all wrong,” Jo cut in. She was munching on an apple and wiping the juice from her chin. “I heard that he wouldn’t even come here unless they made him a Scout. He’s this really good fighter, right? Was part of some underground fighting ring, totally illegal. Decided to join just on a whim.” 

“Bullshit,” Benny said. “You got it all wrong, Little Harvelle, as usual.” 

“I told you not to call me that,” Jo said through clenched teeth, pointing her apple menacingly in his direction.

Dean sighed, and stood with his empty plate to leave his friends to argue. As he passed Castiel’s table, they shared eye contact for a split second before Dean averted his eyes. Putting his dirty plate on the pile with the others, he braced his shoulders as he walked into the cold.

He stood with his back against the wall of the large building, feeling the bricks dig into his shoulder blades and listening to the buzz of the recruits inside the large hall. He faced the forest enshrouded the training camp, taking a deep breath of chilled autumn air. Mosquitos buzzed on the wind.

“Mind if I join you?”

Dean nearly jumped out of his skin at the voice. He turned to Castiel, who was standing there with blank eyes. Dean nodded, dumbly, and gestured to the space on the wall next to him. 

“It was getting too loud in there,” Castiel explained as he leaned against the wall. “I assume it was the same for you.”

Dean stared at him.

"What?" Castiel asked, expression twisting into something uncomfortable.

“Dude, I think that’s the most you’ve ever said to me. Ever.” 

Castiel huffed a laugh. He slid to the ground and sat with his elbows resting on his knees. “It’s not my fault that you only attempted to talk to me while we were training.” 

“You’re the kind that gets in the zone, huh?”

“You could say that.”

Dean sat next to him. He spreads his legs out in the cool grass. “Well, I’m Dean. If you didn’t already know that.”

Castiel nodded. “I did.” 

“And that’s really your name—Castiel?” At Castiel’s nod, Dean hummed. “Well, that’s a mouthful. I think I’m just gonna call you Cas.” 

Castiel shrugged one shoulder. “If you wish.” 

Dean grinned. “Cas,” he said again into the dark night. “Yeah, that sounds way better.” 

Cas gave Dean one of his small, secret smiles, and Dean’s heart jolted from the sight of it. “I agree,” he said, softly.

#attack on titan au #destiel #my writing #will i write more of this? #maybe. if i get bullied enough #if you haven't seen the anime or read the manga don't worry #you can still read this drabble and kinda get the idea

[deans-baby-momma]

The Story of Us-Chapter 10

A/N: This is a rewrite of a story my good friend @spnbaby-67 allowed me to take and rewrite. All mistakes are mine. This is canon divergent, meaning some things that happened in the show will still happen here but with my own twist to it.

Summary: She and Dean met when they were kids. Even at such a young age, she knew that he was her soulmate. Being the daughter of a hunter, Michaela (Micki) Singer knew the life he led came with a price, but she was up to the challenge.

Pairings: Dean Winchester/reader, Sam Winchester/friend!reader, John Winchester, Mary Winchester (mentioned only), Bobby Singer, and more from the Supernatural universe.

Warnings: Flashbacks are in italics, fluffy stuff, angst stuff, character death, kidnapping, depression, semi-dark themes

WC: 1,137

Present Day (2008)

Dean walks back into the living room from checking on Micki and Maren, to find Sam on his cellphone.

“Okay. Alright. Yea, see you then.” Sam flips the cell shut and sits at the table with all the books and lore spread out.

“What’d Bobby say?” Dean asks as he goes to the refrigerator to grab something to drink. ‘Man, a beer would be nice right about now!’ he thinks to himself as he grabs a bottle of water and twists the cap off.

Pamela is out of I.C.U. She’s stable,” Sam answers as he looks down at all the jumbled papers. 

“And blind because of us,” Dean says, sitting across from his brother. “And we still don’t have any damn answers.”

“Yes, we do,” Sam states. “We have a name or whatever. Castiel.”

“And what do we do with that information? Huh? A big ole bupkis.”

“With the right mumbo-jumbo, we could summon it,” Sam says.

“And bring it here?! Are you fucking insane dude? You saw what it did to Pamela. My family is in the very next room, man! Can’t we just consider this-” he says as he motions to himself,-as a victory? I’m back; I’m not worm food, I am living and breathing and here for Mick and Maren. Let’s just let lying dog lie.”

“So we go someplace else and draw him out,” the younger brother suggests. 

Dean looks at Sam like he’s grown a second head. He is adamant about bringing whatever it was that showed up enough to burn Pamela’s eyeballs straight out of her skull to them.

“What are you going to do? Beat him up? Work him over? What if you’re no match for him, huh? Whatever he/it is, it’s strong enough to rip me from the grips of Hell.”

“I just want to talk to him,” Sam says, defeatedly. Then his face lights up and he pulls a page closer to him and reads. “Dean, look.” 

He hands the paper to his older brother. Dean reads the text on the page. 

‘Angels of the Lord are some of the most powerful beings. They have the ability to do things that are deemed impossible and inconceivable.’

“I’m not doing it here,” Dean finally caves. “Wait until Bobby returns and we’ll go find some deserted place to summon this thing.”

Sam nods and starts gathering up the books and pages from the table. Dean takes another drink of water, silently hoping they are not making a big mistake and he doesn’t end up back on that rack of torture.

FALL 1994

High school sucks ass! Micki had always liked school but high school is another story. Not only are there more kids to fill the halls and avoid but there are cliques. There are the jocks, the stoners, the nerds, the popular ones and then the category she seems to fall into: the loners.

No one really talks to Micki but she’s not complaining; actually prefers it that way. Maybe she is a loner but she knows she’s not alone because when she gets home she has Dean. Well, he isn’t there but he calls from a payphone near their motel every afternoon and night before going to sleep. He is all she needs. 

“Oh look girls,” a female voice permeates the air. “Looks like someone’s mommy forgot to teach her how to dress.”

“Or style her hair,” another voice chimes in. “God, do you even brush it?”

Micki turns to see a group of about 5 or 6 girls, giggling. They are all in name brand clothing and their faces are caked in makeup; their hair teased high and stiff.. She looks around and realizes she is who they are referring to.

“What?” she asks, innocently.

“Did your mother know you left the house looking like the Brawny man?”

Micki looks down at her attire. Her favorite band, Guns N Roses, insignia on a t-shirt paired with one of Dean’s flannels and a pair of jeans with her Nike’s. She thinks she looks alright; Michaela Singer has never been a girly-girl anyway.

She straightens her shoulders and holds her head high as she responds to her tormentors. “There is nothing wrong with my clothes.”

“Oh honey,” the one who seems to be the leader laughs. “Who told you that? You look hideous. Maybe you need to take some pointers from your mom?”

“My mom died,” Micki says, hoping to get the girls to leave her alone. Instead it backfires.

“Oohh, that explains a lot! Daddy probably wanted a son and now that his wife is gone, he decided to raise you like a boy.”

“That’s not what happened!” Micki cries, unable to keep her emotions in check. The tears spill down her face.

“Oh little orphan Annie going to cry now,” the main girl jokes. “Mommyless and a crybaby.” 

Micki runs down the hall, not caring about running into people as she just wants to get out of the building and home.

“I hate it!” she cries into the phone that evening when Dean asked her how school was. “They’re so mean.”

“Who Micki? Who hurt you? Whose ass do I need to kick?”

“Just-” sniffle “- some mean girls-” sniffle “-calling me names.”

“Baby don’t pay attention to them. You are better than that, I know you are. They're probably just jealous."

 "I doubt that Dean," Micki sniffles again. "They are all so pretty and wear the name brand stuff."

"Micki, baby, you are gorgeous! Don't put yourself down like that you hear me, don't. I think you are beautiful. And so what if they wear name brand shit. Who cares what a person has on the outside, it's the inside that counts. You have a heart of gold and a body to die for. I know, believe me, I've seen you naked and almost have a coronary each time."

That makes Micki giggle and Dean smiles. "That's my girl. I love to hear you laugh."

Micki hears John call Dean's name and her mood drops. She knows that her phone time with her boyfriend is over. He has to go help his dad with whatever they're hunting.

"I gotta go sweetheart, but listen," Dean tells her. "Do not let those ugly bitches bring you down. You are so much more, you are my world. I'll be back as soon as we get this rawhead taken care of. I'll come prove to you how much you mean to me.

"OKAY! I'M COMING! JEEZ! Baby, I gotta go. Talk to you later."

"Okay Dean. Hey, Dean?"

"Yea?"

"Barney."

"Barney, baby. Barney all the way."

Micki hangs up the phone and sighs, as she realizes just how much she misses Dean and how he makes her feel good about herself.

@lostinaseaoffictionalbliss​ @spnbaby-67​ @tftumblin​ @sea040561​ @delightfullykrispypeach​ @larajadeschmidt13​ @atc74​ @vicariouslythruspn​ @squirrelnotsam​  @sandlee44​ @blacktithe7​ @hoboal87​ @mogaruke​ @deanwanddamons​ @supraveng​ @deandreamernp​ @akshi8278​ @lyarr24​ @maggiegirl17​ @chriszgirl92​

#dean winchester #sam winchester #bobby singer #micki singer #dean x micki #the story of us #flashbacks

[plush-froggo]

my take on a Destiel High School AU

Content Warning: language, and a slur

I feel like everyone expects for Cas to be the loner and Dean to be this really popular jock kid? But it would actually be like, the other way around? Like, yeah, Dean’s popular, but at the same time he knows he won’t be there for any longer than like, two months max because he’s in a military family and they’re constantly on the move, so Dean has basically said ‘fuck it’ to making any connections with anyone. He does get on the football team though, and he’s doing tryouts and stuff and that’s when he first meets Cas, because the coach put them head to head to test Dean’s skills. And Dean’s pretty damn good at the game, but Cas is better and Dean’s kinda just like “holy shit, this kid is hot AND he’s kicking my ass? holy fuck” 

Cas is only on the football team because it’s what his father is expecting from him, and he could really care less about playing sports and doing all that normal high school bullshit. Cas would prefer to go lounge about in the library, reading dramatic novels and going out to animal shelters to play with the cats, but instead he’s here on the football team because he’s still living the life his father always wanted for him. And then he’s face to face with Dean Winchester, some new kid who just moved into town and goddamn he’s pretty, but Cas isn’t about to let that make him put his guard down

Dean has made a friend, Benny, who knows a lot about the Novak family; he’s in the same grade as Castiel’s older brother Balthazar, and they talk together a lot. Cas and Benny aren’t close; in fact, Cas doesn’t really seem close with anyone other than his family—and even then, they don’t really seem all that close. Dean manages to get on the team(because he held his own against one of the team’s best players, and he damn near won a few times too)and afterwards, Dean chases Cas down just before they can get to the locker rooms and Dean asks Cas for a few pointers, because he’s never met anyone who could play like Cas before. Cas kind of hesitantly agrees and suggests they meet up later in a park where they can practice in peace and Dean agrees

When they get there, Dean’s dressed in a band shirt, a flannel, and some ripped jeans, meanwhile Cas is wearing like, this full on nerdy-ass striped sweater and Dean almost doesn’t recognize him for a minute. Dean’s like “dude, are you seriously about to play football wearing a sweater when it’s like, 80 degrees out” and Cas is like “ofc not” and takes off the sweater(he’s got a tank top on underneath)and he’s kinda fucking ripped and Dean’s kinda just bi panicking for a bit until Cas is like “are you going to fucking focus here or what” and Dean snaps out of it

Dean starts practicing with Cas like this every day, and they start talking a bit more in school too. It’s by doing this that Dean learns that Cas has basically no idea how to interact with other people; he’s the most social awkward dorky little guy anyone could ever meet. The only people who’ve ever really bothered to talk and get to know him are his family, and they’re all just as fucking weird. One time, after they’re finished practicing in the park for the day, Dean notices an ice cream stand and gets lowkey hyped before remembering he didn’t bring his wallet, and Cas just goes up and buys them both an ice cream. 

And they sit down and start talking. About anything and everything and nothing at all. And it’s around this point in time that Dean thinks he may be starting to fall in love with this weirdo kid and he ends up being way more honest than he ever meant to be with Cas—but how can you not, it’s almost like the guy can read Dean’s mind for Christ’s sake. Dean admits that he hates moving from town to town like this, that he hates never having any connections with people, no real friends. That he hates having to get up and move around over and over again, that he’s always the new kid and that he knows high school is never going to get better for him because of all this. And Cas does his best to comfort Dean, even though he’s not very good at it, but it doesn’t matter that he’s not very good at it—it means the world to Dean just the same

And it’s silent for a few minutes before Cas finally admits that he’s only playing football and on the honor roll and all that stuff because it’s what his father wants from him. He’s expected to be the perfect son, just like his siblings, and he’s scared of rebelling because of the way his brothers were treated when they rebelled, but at the same time he’s sick of not being able to live his own life. “These moments with you—they’re all I have,” Cas admits, and at this point their ice cream is gone and they’re sitting under the shade of a tree in 84 degree weather and they’re both still covered in sweat and a layer of dirt from their practice. “I wouldn’t…give them up for the world.” And it’s almost like Cas wanted to say something different, but he won’t tell Dean that. Not just yet. 

They never act on their feelings for one another, because they both know that Dean’s leaving and it’s only a matter of time before he’s packing up and sent away to another school, but they’re enjoying their time together as much as they can. During football practice, Cas cracks jokes that only Dean can hear, and Dean gets in trouble for laughing so hard, and Dean tries to explain himself but no one can believe that serious, stoic Cas would make a joke—a dick joke, no less—and Cas has the slightest of smirks on his face while Dean, still laughing, calls him a dick. Dean gets benched for disrupting practice, and Cas immediately follows him over despite the coach yelling for Cas to get back there. Cas and Dean crack jokes and laugh together on the benches as the other students practice drills, and they both realize that they’ve never had anything like this and that they’ll likely never have anything like this again once Dean is gone

A few students start talking about how close Dean and Cas are getting these days, and one is bold enough(stupid enough) to call them ‘fags’ as they’re walking down the halls together. Dean is ready to bash the guy’s face in, but he can’t even do anything before Cas throws his bag at the fucker and starts raining hell down upon this kid, who can hardly fight back due to the shock. It’s the first time Cas has ever gotten detention and everyone’s staring at him in shock, then he turns back to Dean who grins and says “That was awesome!”

Later, while Cas is in detention, Dean begs Benny to help him get Cas out. So Benny grabs Balthazar and says ‘hey, your kid brother is in detention and his boyfriend wants help bailing him out’ and Balthazar’s like ‘Cas never mentioned anything about a boyfriend’ and Dean’s all flustered and stuff, but then Benny asks “Wasn’t that what the whole fight was about? Whether or not you and Cas are dating?” And Dean says ‘no, it wasn’t, the kid called us a slur’ and Benny and Balthazar kinda just share a look

While Cas is sitting in detention, he’s bored out of his mind, and then all of a sudden, Balthazar comes in and starts absolutely berating the teacher like “how dare you put my brother in detention! don’t you know he’d never do anything wrong in his life! cas could never hurt a fly!” and the teacher’s sitting there arguing with him like “he broke another student’s nose!” and Balthazar just adamantly denies all of this. Benny comes in and starts the argument that if Cas was in detention, the other kid should be too, because he was the one who started in by throwing slurs around and the teacher can’t find any room to argue and Cas is all confused by all this until he feels a hand on his shoulder and he looks up and Dean is grinning down at him

Dean grins down at Cas and asks “Wanna get out of here?” and Cas takes a moment to register that Dean’s here, and he’s grinning down at Cas in this way that makes Cas’ heart flutter and he gives Dean a soft smile and nods. Dean grabs Cas by the shoulder and stands him up and then they run out of the room while the teacher is still distracted, and they keep running until they make it to the park and they’re both panting and laughing and they just barely manage to collapse under a tree(the same tree they shared ice cream under)and they just lay there in the grass and laugh for a little while longer. “I just saved your ass, Cas,” Dean says with a bright grin, and Cas smiles this smile that has Dean grinning even wider as his stomach does flips

“Thank you,” Cas says, before giving another laugh. “You saved me from perdition.” And Dean laughs as well, because of course Cas would say some weird, dorky shit like that. Cas just stares at him and that’s when he realizes just how in love he is with Dean Winchester, and he realizes how much more it’s going to hurt when Dean has to leave. The one he loves is so close to him and yet Cas can only have him for a little while before he’ll be ripped away, and Cas will be alone all over again. This is the one person other than his family who has gotten to really know Cas for who he really is, and Cas desperately doesn’t want to lose that, but he knows there’s no other option. And he silently resigns himself to that, not knowing that Dean is doing the same thing

They knew each other for a week before they fully fell in love, and everyone says that Dean Winchester is a bad influence on Castiel Novak, but Cas thinks he’s the best influence and he’d follow Dean to the ends of the earth if it just meant that they could be who they really are. They’re both aware of the feelings they harbor towards one another, and in some aspect, they’re aware that the other harbors feelings towards them, but neither one of them act on it. They’re both content to just be in each other’s presence for now

And then comes the day when Dean has to leave. 

Dean practically begs his mother to let them stay here, to even just let Dean stay there. He begs her day and night, he begs his father over the phone to let them stay, he screams into his pillow at night and Sam is the only one there who sort of understands what’s made Dean start acting this way. Sam might be Dean’s kid brother, but he’s also the only one who knows exactly what Dean’s going through, and he’s the only one who Dean talks to anymore—other than Cas, of course. The one thing he’s never told Sam about is Cas—so even though Sam understands, there’s still this disconnect between them. But Mary and John refuse to leave Dean there, and Mary tells them that they need to be packed up by morning because they’re leaving out by lunchtime. Dean locks himself in his room and calls Cas and starts ranting over the phone, but before he can really do anything Cas hangs up and Dean just stares at the phone, his heart hurting. Dean takes to throwing about the things in his room in his emotions, and he does this for a good few minutes before finally sitting down and he slowly just starts crying because now the one person who he so desperately wants to talk to just hung up on him and he feels so truly alone in that moment. 

Then he realizes that someone’s opening up his window and before he even has time to register what’s going on, Cas is in his room, wearing sweatpants, a loose band shirt, and tennis shoes, and his hair is a mess like he had just gotten out of bed, and he’s panting so hard and Dean realizes that Cas ran to get here. Dean doesn’t even have time to ask Cas what he’s doing there when Cas grabs him by the shoulders and hugs him. Dean hugs back and breaks down into tears, telling Cas he doesn’t want to leave this town, he doesn’t want to just up and move again. Cas holds him while he cries, and it isn’t until something warm and wet falls onto Dean’s shoulder that he finally realizes that Cas has been crying too. 

When Dean’s finally done ranting and crying, Cas holds on for a bit longer, before he pulls away. “Dean,” he starts, his voice raspy and his eyes ringed with red but still so vibrantly blue, “I told you that I wouldn’t trade the moments we shared together for the world, right?” Dean nods, a bit confused. “I told you I wouldn’t give them up for the world. I wouldn’t give you up for the world either.” Dean’s eyes begin watering up again and so do Cas’. “I know it’s probably too late to say this, but-” 

“Don’t,” Dean cuts him off, a tear sliding down his cheek. “Don’t do this, Cas. Not now. Please.” 

“I love you, Dean,” Cas continues anyways. He’s crying again, but he’s wearing this smile as he looks Dean dead in the eyes. “I love you, and I always have from the second I saw you. And no matter what happens, no matter where you go, I will wait for you.” Dean breaks down again, because he loves Cas too and that’s what hurts so much about leaving. He doesn’t give a shit about the town, and yeah he’ll miss Benny but he’s lost friends before, but with Cas, it’s different. He may have been able to convince himself before that Cas was just another friend, someone he could get over, but now he can’t. And then Cas kisses him and they’re both still crying, and the window’s open letting in cold air and Dean’s room is a mess and he still hasn’t started packing, and he feels like his world is falling apart around him. But Cas pulls away, and he’s still holding onto Dean, keeping him held together. The smile on Cas’ face shudders a bit as he looks Dean in the eyes, and begs “Tell me you love me too.” 

“I love you, Cas,” Dean croaks. And that’s why it hurts so much. To know that tomorrow morning, Dean will never see Cas again. To know that he’ll never know what it’s like to hold hands with Cas as they walk down the street looking through stores, to know that he’ll never know what it’s like to hear Cas’ laugh again, to know that he’ll never be there to ask Cas to Prom and that there’s no chance they’ll get to dance together like idiots because Dean has no idea how to dance. Dean tells this to Cas and more, and that’s when Cas stands up. He pulls Dean up with him and looks over to the stereo in Dean’s room. 

“So we dance here,” Cas decides. “We can’t have a Prom night? Fine. We can dance together here. One last hurrah before our worlds fall apart.” And Cas walks over and puts in a Led Zeppelin mixtape into the stereo and presses play, before turning the volume up. He turns to Dean, his eyes still red and puffy, but he smiles and holds his hand out. Dean stares at Cas for a minute, before he starts laughing. Cas stares at him in confusion before Dean takes Cas’ hand and pulls him in closely. 

“I was gonna give you this mixtape,” Dean says. They start dancing—swaying, really—and moving about the wreckage of Dean’s room. Dean laughs again as he looks into Cas’ eyes. “My dad, he, uh, he gave my mom a Zeppelin mixtape. So, I thought, uh-” 

“You’d make one for me?” Cas asks, a smile forming on his face once again. And with that they’re both laughing. “I hope you know you’re a sap.” Dean leans his forehead against Cas’ forehead, staring into those brilliant blue eyes. 

“I’m your sap,” he mutters, and Cas’ smile widens. 

“That you are,” Cas muses. “And I’m yours.” 

When the mixtape is over, they stop dancing, but they still hold each other for a few minutes longer. Finally, Dean pulls away and begins looking around at his room. “I guess I need to pack up,” Dean mumbles, and all at once he’s reminded that he’ll never get to have a moment like this with Cas ever again. 

Cas moves one hand from Dean’s shoulder and takes Dean’s hand into his own. He squeezes it tightly, getting Dean’s attention. “Let me help,” Cas offers. It’s more of a beg than either of them realize, a desperate plea to eke out as much time together as they can manage; even if it’s a reminder of the fact that Dean’s about to leave. 

Cas helps Dean pack, and they put on other mixtapes and sing along badly to the music. More than once, they catch the other with tears in their eyes as they pack away Dean’s belongings into a suitcase and a duffel bag. They finally get everything packed up and sit down on Dean’s bed in silence. Dean grabs Cas’ hand and holds onto it, trying to remember what it feels like so he doesn’t forget. 

Then Dean gets up and he takes the Zeppelin mixtape. He stares down at it for a minute before returning to Cas’ side and handing it to him. Cas takes it, staring down at the tape for a bit. Then he reaches up to the back of his neck and unclasps a chain. He pulls a necklace out of his shirt, before handing it to Dean. It’s a pair of wings, Dean realizes. “This is something that’s passed down in my family,” Cas says. “Your family has Led Zeppelin and mine has wings. So if you’re giving me what’s yours, I’ll give you mine.” And Dean nods a little, before putting on the necklace. 

They sit and talk until long past midnight. Long past time for the both of them to be in bed and sleeping away for their big days tomorrow. “You gotta promise me something,” Dean says. 

“Of course, Dean. Anything.” 

“You gotta promise me that you’ll stop living the life your dad wants you to live. You do what makes you happy, Cas. Don’t let anyone tell you how you should live your life other than you. I won’t be around to break you out of detention anymore, and I won’t be around to drag you out to the park for ice cream. You gotta do what makes you happy, not what makes him happy, you understand me?” Cas nods. 

“I understand.” There’s a bit of a silence after that. “Thank you, Dean. For everything.” 

They finally realize how late it’s getting and they’re both exhausted but neither one wants to leave, because leaving now means you’ll never see him again and they both so desperately want to stay—Dean, in this town, and Cas, in Dean’s room—but they know that can’t happen. It’s 3 AM when Cas finally sneaks out of Dean’s window, not before they tell each other “I love you” again, and not before a parting kiss, and Dean watches as Cas begrudgingly walks away from Dean’s house. Dean wants nothing more than to chase after Cas, to run out after him and away from his family, just to stay here with Cas. But instead, he closes his window and shuts off his light and curls up in bed and just cries, wanting Cas by his side. 

They’re gone before lunchtime. Cas quits the football team the same day. He skips the rest of school and instead goes to the park where he and Dean would practice, where they would talk and eat ice cream together, where they were free to be honest with each other. Where he realized he had fallen for Dean so hard, he wasn’t sure he could ever recover from it. And he just cries. For hours. Balthazar’s the one to find him and bring him home well after dark, when Cas is just mentally and emotionally exhausted. Chuck berates Cas for quitting the football team, for getting a detention, for skipping school, but Cas just walks past him and upstairs to his room. He gets out an old stereo—one he hardly ever used anymore—and he puts in the mixtape. Cas listens to it on repeat for hours on end until he finally cries himself to sleep. 

Dean never removes the necklace. Not to shower, not for football practice at another school, not to sleep. He keeps Cas’ wings just over his heart, always. They promised not to forget about each other, and they don’t. But they move on. Over time, they move on, and they don’t even realize it. 

Dean moves out at 20, when he’s saved up enough money for a decent house and he’s got a stable job. Cas is kicked out at 17, for causing problems in school and getting into constant fights with Chuck. He moves in with his older brothers, Lucifer, Gabriel, and Balthazar, who willingly welcome him in. Dean becomes a mechanic. Cas doesn’t know what he wants to do with his life, so he begins working at various jobs while he attempts to discover himself. They’d never admit it, but they both think of their first love every day—Dean, when he notices the silver wings in the mirror just before he goes to shower, and Cas, when he plays an old mixtape on his way to and from work. 

Dean’s 22 when he gets a new girlfriend. She’s beautiful and loves baking, but her eyes are such a vibrant shade of blue that Dean thinks of someone else before he thinks of her. They last a month before they break up. Dean tries again with another woman, and another, and another. 

When Dean’s 26, his brother is in college and Dean considers stopping by for a visit. He drops into town, stops by Stanford, and meets Jessica, who he really likes. She’s sassy, she’s a sweetheart, and she’s gorgeous; perfect for Sam. He’s sitting down with Jess and Sam for dinner one day, and he doesn’t even realize that the necklace is showing when Jess asks about it. Dean is silent for a bit. He runs his hand down his face as he thinks of a dark-haired, blue eyed boy who gave him this necklace ten years ago, and a somber smile grows on his face. “My first love gave me this necklace,” he tells her, and he’s not lying. And Jess smiles with him and asks about it. But he can’t bring himself to talk about Cas. To share what made Cas so goddamn special to him with anyone else, because no one could really get what made Cas so…Cas.

Dean and Sam get drunk later that night. “What was her name?” Sam asks. 

“Cas,” Dean says, and the name is somehow sweet on his tongue. “His name was Cas.” 

And Sam gets this look on his face. And Dean recognizes it, he thinks he does anyways. It’s the same look that was on his father’s face when Dean first considered the fact that he might be bisexual. A look of disgust. But that’s not the look on Sam’s face. “What was he like?” Sam asks. And Dean breaks down crying again, for the first time in 10 years he breaks down sobbing just like he did that night with Cas, back when he would have to leave Cas for good. 

All the while Dean tells Sam about Cas, Sam has this odd little smile on his face. One that Dean can’t really place. He can’t really figure if Sam is being condescending or not either, but he continues. He doesn’t share his and Cas’ more intimate moments, like the moment Cas gave his wings to Dean and when Dean gave a mixtape to Cas, but he tells Sam enough. Enough so that Sam gets an idea of who Castiel is—was. 

In the morning, Dean is very much hungover. Sam still manages to get up at the ass-crack of dawn, and he takes great joy in blaring Metallica right in Dean’s ear to get him to wake up. Jess leaves out for work not too long after Dean was rudely awoken, and he hardly has time to process the mind-numbing headache he has before Sam is throwing clothes at him. “We’re going out to get some coffee,” Sam tells him. 

“What, you don’t have coffee here?” Dean asks. Sam just shrugs on a jacket, giving Dean a small grin. Dean begrudgingly gets dressed and follows Sam out into the daylight. He follows him into a small cafe that’s practically empty save for the barista. Dean goes to collapse in one of the booths while Sam orders two coffees. Dean can hear Sam chatting with the barista as the coffee is brewed, although he hardly pays attention to it. He’s got one hand pinching the bridge of his nose, his eyes screwed shut as he attempts to deal with this hangover. 

It takes a few minutes before Dean hears Sam telling the barista “Why don’t you join us? There’s no one else around right now; you’ve got nothing better to do.” Dean internally groans to himself—he was in no mood to meet one of Sam’s friends, especially when it felt like his skull was splitting open. 

A quiet but deep voice responds, low enough that Dean can’t hear it over the sounds of the coffee machines. Sam continues trying to convince the barista to join them, while Dean rubs the rest of the sleep from his eyes. Finally, the barista seems to mumble out an agreement, which seems to please Sam. 

Sam joins Dean at the booth, setting down a plain black coffee in front of Dean. Rather than sitting across from Dean however, he sits next to Dean. Dean doesn’t have time to question it before a dark haired, blue eyed man sits down across from him. “I wanted you to meet my brother, Cas,” Sam says, smiling. Dean’s heart thumps loudly in his chest as familiar vibrant blue eyes swivel over to him, before lighting up in recognition. 

“Hello, Dean,” the man, Castiel, greets. Dean swallows thickly, and all at once, his hangover seems to be gone. 

“H-Hey, Cas,” Dean replies. 

“Oh, you know what?” Sam bursts. “I just remembered, I have to talk with one of my professors about something. I have to go if I want to make it in time for his office hours.” Sam stands up, taking his coffee with him. “I’ll see you later, guys!” Sam leaves, and Dean and Cas stare at each other. 

It’s a bit awkward at first. Dean hardly knows what to say. “I wasn’t expecting to run into you here,” Cas finally admits. 

“Yeah, me either,” Dean mumbles. He clears his throat. “So uh, what uh, what happened to you?” 

Cas tells him. About quitting the football team, about getting kicked out, and moving in with his brothers. About searching for himself and for what he wanted, and about wondering if he should ever try to find Dean again. But he had figured that it would be pointless. “Ten years had passed by—what happened with us was a long time ago. I figured that you would’ve forgotten about me, or moved on.” 

“How could I forget?” Dean asks, pulling the chain out from underneath his shirt. The wings sparkle in the sunlight, reflecting in Cas’ eyes. “You left me with a part of you, after all.” And Cas smiles, and Dean finds his heart fluttering again just like it had all those years ago. They talk, and it’s easier to slide into conversation than Dean first thought it would be. It’s only interrupted when someone enters the cafe again, and Cas is forced to go back to work. He tells Dean when he gets off work, though. 

Dean is waiting outside the cafe for Cas, and once Cas is out the door, Dean drives them to a park. They find a tree and sit under it and talk about anything and everything and nothing at all. Before Dean realizes it, it’s getting dark and he’s driving Cas back home. Cas moves to get out of the car when Dean stops him. “I’m leaving town tomorrow,” Dean says. He reaches over to the glove box and pulls out a notepad and a pen. “But I’m not leaving here until I can make sure we’ve got some way to get back in contact again.” He writes down his phone number, tears the paper from the notepad and hands it to Cas. 

Cas turns to him with a smile. “Thank you, Dean,” he says. “It’s been…wonderful to see you again.” Dean nods a bit. 

“Yeah, you too,” he says, unable to keep a smile off his own face. 

Dean leaves town, and Cas calls almost as soon as Dean arrives home. Dean saves Cas’ number in his phone immediately, and soon enough, they’re talking on the phone for hours on end after their work is done. It becomes a routine of theirs. 

When Dean goes up to visit Sam again, he visits Cas just as, if not more often. Sam teases him about it relentlessly, but he’s just happy that his brother is happy. It isn’t too much longer before Dean is reminded of why he fell in love with Cas in the first place, and it just so happens to slip out one night when he’s dropping Cas off at home. He blurts it out on instinct, and then immediately realizes how stupid it was to say that. But Cas just smiles and says “I love you too,” before shutting the car door and walking back into his house. Dean stares after him for a moment, before finally pulling out of the driveway. 

Cas finds the time to visit Dean down in Kansas, and eventually Dean convinces him that it would be a good idea for him to move in with Dean. Sam teases Dean even more about this. Dean finally realizes just how happy is he to have Cas by his side again. They dance to the Zeppelin mixtape Dean made so many years ago, and this time they don’t have to worry about the other one leaving. They fall into a routine together, although nothing is really specified until they’re out shopping for groceries one day and someone asks them if they’re together. Cas is a bit hesitant to reply at first, and so is Dean. Sure, they live together, they occasionally share the same bed and they kiss each other, but they haven’t really said anything about establishing a relationship. So Dean decides he’ll do it then and there, by grabbing Cas’ hand and intertwining their fingers and he tells the person “Yes, we are.” And he certainly doesn’t miss the smile on Cas’ face, because it’s mirrored on his own. 

Dean and Cas are invited to Sam’s wedding, although Cas is initially hesitant. “I’m not sure your father would want me there,” Cas says to Dean. 

“Fuck him,” Dean replies, before leaning over and kissing the tip of Cas’ nose. “You were invited, and no way in hell I’m missing my baby brother’s wedding. No way in hell I’m leaving you behind again, either. Besides, Sam wants you as a groomsman. How can you say no to that?” 

They attend the wedding, and they avoid John. Dean is Sam’s best man, and he gives a speech that makes almost everyone laugh(and Sam bury his head in his hands). Cas congratulates Sam and Jess, and Sam hugs Cas tightly. Cas is a bit taken aback at first, until Sam pulls away with tears in his eyes. “I want you to know that you’re like a brother to me, Cas,” Sam says. “And I’m so happy for you and Dean.” 

Dean gets a bit too buzzed on the margaritas at the bar, and Cas is dragging him away from the reception sooner than they thought. They make sure to pass by Sam and congratulate him one last time before returning to their motel though. Cas drives back to the motel and helps Dean into bed. He considers getting a coffee for himself when Dean sits up and grabs him by the sleeve. “Cas, I’ve been wanting to ask you a question,” Dean says. His tone is serious, and when Cas looks back at him, he looks dead sober. 

“Of course. What is it, Dean?” Cas asks. 

“We’ve been through a lot together. Hell, we’ve been through a lot apart, too. But ever since I ran into you again, I’ve been thinking about how much I want to spend time with you. I don’t want to risk letting you go again. The moments we have together, I wouldn’t give them up for the world.” Cas cracks a small smile and sits down next to Dean on the bed. “I’m just saying, you know…I love you, Cas. Leaving you was one of the worst things I’ve ever had to do. I want you by my side, now and forever. This question has been on my mind almost since the day we met at that cafe, I’ve just been waiting for…I dunno, the perfect moment, I guess.” 

Cas’ eyes widen as Dean talks. “There’s so many things I love about you,” Dean continues. He goes on to list them; the way Cas smiles, the color of his eyes, his bedhead, the careful way he tends to the flowers in the yard, the sound of his laugh, the sound of his voice, the way his eyes light up when he sees Dean, the way he wraps his arms around Dean so tightly when they hug, the way he’s learned to stand up for himself, the way he sasses off characters in the soap operas they watch, the way he falls asleep on Dean’s shoulder, the way he looks when he listens to Dean talk, the way he’s always willing to help even if he has no idea what to do, the way he always does his best to do the right thing, the way he broke out of his shell and carved his own path as a person, and so much more. Dean barely has the ring box out of his pocket and the words “Will you-” out of his mouth before Cas is kissing him. He pulls away briefly to say ‘Yes’ before he smashes his lips onto Dean’s again. 

They fall asleep in each other’s arms, like they had wanted to do so many years ago. They plan to dance to a Zeppelin song at their wedding, and their rings have wings engraved in them. Dean asks if they can have a pie replace their wedding cake, and Cas suggests they can have both. Dean considers inviting John, if it’s alright with Cas. Cas says it’s fine. Cas considers inviting his family, and his father. Dean persuades him to send the invites. 

All of Castiel’s brothers arrive to attend the wedding, even those who had seemingly disowned him. John does not attend the wedding, and neither does Chuck. But to Dean and Cas, it doesn’t matter. They have each other, and the family that really matters was already there. Sam is Dean’s best man of course. It’s Dean’s first time meeting Cas’ family, and all of them threaten to kill him if he ends up hurting Cas. Cas barges in between them, defending Dean from their threats, and growing exasperated when Gabriel ruffles his hair, saying “We’re just trying to make sure he treats our little brother alright!” 

A little while later, Balthazar and Dean are alone. “You’ve always made him happy, since the day you first met him,” Balthazar remarks to Dean. “I trust in you to keep doing that.” 

“I’ll do my best,” Dean replies. Balthazar smiles at Dean, patting him on the shoulder. 

“Good. It’s in your best interests.” 

Dean and Cas’ honeymoon is what anyone would expect. Steamy and hot, yes; but afterwards, they spent the whole night cuddled together in bed, talking. Talking about anything and everything and nothing at all. They’re both happy. They’re both free. They know they’ll never leave the other ever again. They fall asleep in each other’s arms, a Zeppelin song playing quietly on the stereo, a pair of wings over Dean’s heart, and a ring on their fingers. They’re at peace. And they’re happy. And it’s good.

#Destiel #supernatural destiel #supernatural #supernatural au #SPN #spn au #dean winchester #castiel #cw: slurs #cw: language #i was having some destiel feels one night #and i wrote this up over the course of a couple of hours #deancas #castiel novak #high school au

[ao3feeddestiel]

my heart is full of you

read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/kbc2rNC by mocdeqn Dean Winchester is a 16 year old boy who has always been kinda a loner, an ‘outcast’ some might say. That’s until he meets Castiel Novak, the problem is that they met online. They live more than ten hours away from eachother, however this doesn’t seem to stop them from becoming extremely close friends. Maybe even more? After around a year of knowing eachother, and countless hours of talking online, they decided it’s finally time they meet up. Words: 493, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English Fandoms: Supernatural (TV 2005) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Categories: M/M Characters: Dean Winchester, Castiel (Supernatural) Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester Additional Tags: Supernatural - Freeform, Destiel - Freeform, DeanCas - Freeform, Fluff, Dean Winchester/Castiel Novak - Freeform, Teenagers, AU, no explicit content, mlm, Happy Ending, friends to lovers?, Angst read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/kbc2rNC

#IFTTT #my heart is full of you #mocdeqn

[ao3feed-destiel-02]

my heart is full of you

read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/xQXNRd8 by mocdeqn Dean Winchester is a 16 year old boy who has always been kinda a loner, an ‘outcast’ some might say. That’s until he meets Castiel Novak, the problem is that they met online. They live more than ten hours away from eachother, however this doesn’t seem to stop them from becoming extremely close friends. Maybe even more? After around a year of knowing eachother, and countless hours of talking online, they decided it’s finally time they meet up. Words: 493, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English Fandoms: Supernatural (TV 2005) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Categories: M/M Characters: Dean Winchester, Castiel (Supernatural) Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester Additional Tags: Supernatural - Freeform, Destiel - Freeform, DeanCas - Freeform, Fluff, Dean Winchester/Castiel Novak - Freeform, Teenagers, AU, no explicit content, mlm, Happy Ending, friends to lovers?, Angst read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/xQXNRd8

#IFTTT #ao3feed #fanfic #(your tags here)

[sinnova]

First Outings

It wasn't a date.

It was just a cool, fun outing with two newly-acquainted friends. Fishing was a perfectly normal thing for two men to do together and Castiel felt silly for feeling so giddy over such a simple event. Maybe it was because he really didn't have any real friends to begin with, or maybe it was because Dean knew such a deep secret about him, or maybe...no, that couldn't be it. This was just something new that a loner like him simply wasn't used to. It probably wouldn't be so nerve-wracking if he had spent more time hanging out with other people and socializing.

The butterflies continued the whole week as they texted, the whole day before their loosely scheduled hangout, and the entire morning as he prepared to leave for the cabin. He'd snagged some good vegetables from the garden his mother tended as a little gift for Dean, unsure exactly what he liked but knowing he seemed to enjoy cooking for himself. You couldn't go wrong with fresh veggies, and herbs, really. Castiel packed them in a little basket and headed out, cautious as always for traps and lurkers.

As he neared the cabin, Castiel spent a little longer than he would ever admit making sure he looked halfway decent, trying his best to tame his wild hair and make sure he didn't have any leaves stuck to him. He'd dressed comfortably, but even in a t-shirt and nice jeans, he felt like he just looked like a disaster. It's just a hangout, he though. No reason to be so nervous about nothing. As if his friend would truly judge an old band tee and some jeans. They were fishing, after all.

"Hey!" Castiel greeted Dean as casually as he could as he approached the cabin, finding the man already outside lingering on the back porch. He looked...stunning. "I, uh, I brought you this," he continued sheepishly, offering the basket out to Dean. "I remembered that you seemed to like cooking, and, well, fresh grown stuff is always the best. My mom's really proud of her garden, and, uh, I grow herbs indoors here and there. Hopefully you can make somethin' nice with all this."

[goldenraeofsun]

would you have me, would you want me?

Part I

Castiel wipes his sweaty hands on his slacks. 

He tugs at the tie strangling him, and runs a hand through his hair. He grimaces. So much for all the preparation he put into his appearance in front of the mirror twenty minutes ago.

He inhales a deep breath and steps inside his high school for the first time in ten years.

The fluorescent lighting doesn’t do the old halls any favors, and the entryway, at least, smells violently of lemon-scented cleaner. There have been a few pathetic attempts at livening up the stubbornly beige walls - colorful signs mark the way to the gym, like Castiel would ever forget even after ten years.

It’s strange to see the place so empty.

“Hello!” Becky, their alumni representative, waves him over to a table just inside the entryway. It’s completely cluttered with bits of paper and blank name tags. “Are you here for the reunion?”

Castiel coughs. “Yes.”

“So glad to have you here,” Becky says as Castiel drags his feet closer. “Name?”

“Castiel Novak?”

“Oh!” Becky says, her eyes widening. “I hardly recognized you without the books, and the coat, and the...” she gestures vaguely to her own face, which Castiel takes to mean the semi-permanent scowl he wore all throughout high school. Before Castiel can react, she ducks her head and drags her finger down a clipboard. “Alright, Castiel, I’ll mark you down as present. Fill out a name tag if you want, and here are your tickets for your two drinks. Would you like to enter the fundraising raffle? We’re hoping to send the volleyball team to nationals this year.”

Castiel quails under Becky’s doe eyes and forks over ten dollars for the raffle. He also writes out a name tag, since his classmates might have the same reaction as Becky.

Armed with his name tag and drinks tickets, he follows the signs to the gym.

* * *

Cas wipes his sweaty hands on his slacks.

He shouldn’t have agreed to this. He doesn’t go to parties. He is not a partier. The closest he’s ever come to one was after his brother’s graduation, but that was eleven years ago. Cas was seven.

Cas successfully avoided all high school parties for the past three and a half years, but apparently nothing lasts forever.

Biting his lip, he presses down hard on Tessa’s doorbell. 

The door opens, and Cas barely has enough time to school his face into a less terrified expression before Tessa appears. “You’re not the pizza man,” she says, frowning.

Cas blinks at her. “I... sorry?” He offers the wine Uncle Marv gifted his parents, the one Cas’s mother promised never to drink in a million years.

Tessa’s face brightens as she takes it from him. “Who invited you?”

“Dean - Dean Winchester,” Cas says, like there could be any other Dean that mattered at Edlund High.

Tessa opens the door wider, calling over her shoulder, “Dean!”

Cas steps inside without waiting for Dean to rescue him. Dean is probably too occupied to see him inside - or so Cas assumes. He’s never been to a party like this before, but even the senior year loner hears about the types of things Dean gets up to at events like these. 

Cas follows Tessa past a flight of roped-off stairs further into the house. The noise and the people hit him full force in a dimly lit living room. Music blasts from speakers connected to a massive entertainment center. The whole area is jam-packed with teenagers and smells strongly of beer and hormones. Cas scans the crowd, recognizing more faces than not, to his relief. 

“Kitchen’s that way,” Tessa says loudly, pointing to a door, bright light spilling from beyond. “If you want to get a drink, be my guest.” She shoulders past a group of girls from Cas’s homeroom and disappears from sight.

Cas heads for the kitchen. Maybe he can clear his head there and come up with a plan. Or maybe he can get drunk enough not to care about all the bad decisions that led him here.

* * *

Castiel turns at the sound of his name.

He spins around in place, searching the faces in the gym for one he recognizes.

“Cas, you made it!”

Castiel stumbles as Charlie’s arms wrap around him. “I didn’t think you’d come,” she says as she steps away, a broad grin stretching across her face.

“I live in the next school district over. I’m sure people traveled farther than that.”

“Yeah, but,” Charlie says awkwardly, “I know high school wasn’t the best time for you.”

Castiel’s mouth twitches. “Only the last few months of senior year. The rest went well enough.” He scans the gym before meeting Charlie’s knowing gaze. 

Charlie winks at him. It’s not like she couldn’t put the pieces together herself. Most of their points of conversation revolve around a shared high school experience, so naturally Dean comes up once or twice (or a dozen times) during their sporadic get togethers.

It was even nice, sometimes, since Charlie is the only person from his teenage years he sees anymore. 

“I know what you’re talking about,” Charlie says with a shudder. “I got bangs for senior year. Bangs.”

Castiel smiles weakly. “You could have made worse decisions.”

"If we’re going to talk about how dumb we were as teenagers, then I’m going to need another drink,” Charlie says as they make their way to the makeshift bar. “Don’t worry,” she says in an undertone, “He’s not here yet.”

“He’s coming?”

Charlie throws him a look. “Dude, he’s the newest hire in the English department. There’s no way he got out of attending his own reunion.”

Castiel absentmindedly nods along as he looks around. There’s a slideshow projecting onto a far wall, showing candid shots from ten years ago. About fifty people mill around the gym, chatting in little groups, nobody Castiel recognizes. More than a few people huddle over their own on their phones, ignoring everyone else.

He asks, “Is this typically what happens at these things?”

“How should I know?” Charlie says as they get in line. “This is my first reunion too.”

Castiel turns to her. “You didn’t go to our five year?”

Charlie wrinkles her nose. “I was kind of in hot water for hacking into NORAD so I laid low in Norway until everything died down.”

Castiel shakes his head. “Why would a tech consultant for Roman Enterprises hack into NORAD?”

“Why wouldn’t I?” Charlie shoots back.

Castiel has no retort prepared, so he steps up to trade his ticket for a glass of cheap wine. “How is Dorothy doing?”

“She’s good. Away at a meteorology conference, but those’re the hazards of dating a nerd.” Charlie exhales a long-suffering sigh, watching with mild interest as the bartender pours out Castiel’s glass.

Castiel snorts. “I wouldn’t know.”

Charlie elbows him playfully in the side. “’Course you don’t. You always liked them dumber, didn’t you?”

“Dean wasn’t dumb.”

Charlie cackles as she hands over her own ticket to the bartender. “I didn’t say anyone’s name.”

* * *

Cas turns at the sound of his name. 

“Dean?” he answers.

Tessa’s kitchen is only slightly quieter than the living room, but not much. There are fewer people here, though, which leaves Cas some breathing room. 

Dean strides up to him, a red cup of something in his hand and a grin on his face. Party-goer Dean doesn’t look any different than Student Dean, clad in worn jeans and his favorite Led Zeppelin short sleeved shirt. “Hey, man. I didn’t think you’d actually come.”

“Of course,” Cas says, clutching his own drink tightly. “You invited me.”

“Yeah, well,” Dean says, his gaze skittering away, “this isn’t your usual scene, though.”

“I can try new things.” Cas takes a sip of his punch and makes a face at the overwhelmingly sweet taste. “It is our senior year, so I thought it might be time.”

“Whatever, man,” Dean says with a laugh, “as long as it got you out of the library.”

Cas’s frown deepens. “What’s wrong with the library?”

“Nothing,” Dean says, eyes widening. He raises his free hand, palm out, in a gesture of no-harm. “It’s just not the sort of place you’d go for a good time, you know what I mean?”

Cas’s eyes narrow. “I’ve had plenty of good times in the library.”

Dean snorts a laugh. “Not the kind I was talking about, Cas.”

Cas hasn’t ever gotten blown in the book stacks of the library like some pornography had indicated was possible, but he won’t call his time spent there a total waste. He says, “If it hadn’t been for our enjoyable tutoring sessions in the library, I wouldn’t be here.”

Dean beams at him. “Yeah, I’m kind of sorry they’re over, but I guess our grades don’t matter any more.”

“What?” Cas blinks at him. “Our grades matter.”

“Dude, it’s April.”

“Colleges can still rescind acceptance letters.”

Dean rolls his eyes. “Come on, you nerd,” he grabs Cas by the hand. “We can’t block the line to the booze or Tessa'll murder me.”

Cas lets himself get led back out into the living room, a bemused expression on his face. The music and the chatter of a dozen different conversations hit him like a palpable slap to the face.

“What do we do now?” Cas asks loudly, as he throws back the rest of his cup of punch. It is much more tolerable in larger, quicker doses.

Dean glances around before leaning closer so Cas could hear him. “Whatever you want.”

Cas shivers as Dean’s breath ghosts over his ear and down his neck.

“We got the dancers, the stoners, the wallflowers,” Dean points each out, “the horndogs...”

Cas tears his gaze away from Charlie and Gilda, entwined on the couch. “Where do you fall?”

“Me?” Dean asks, surprised. He holds up his drink, a smile playing around his lips. “It’s a little early to tell. This is only my third one. Speaking of,” he takes Cas’s drink and drains it, “We should get you another one. You’re barely caught up to me.”

Cas dumbly takes his cup back. If he refills this cup, his lips might touch the same surface Dean’s had. The ghost of a kiss.

It was a technique old Hollywood films used to indicate romantic attraction, since kissing on-screen was heavily restricted. Characters would share cigarettes, food, and drinks instead of touching, especially if the relationship was taboo and wouldn’t pass the censors.

Cas stares up at Dean, uncomprehending.

“Come on, man,” Dean says as he nudges Cas back towards the kitchen. “Before all the good booze is gone.”

* * *

Castiel chokes on his drink.

Charlie gives him a few hard whacks on the back, giggling under her breath. “I know Dean’s hot and all, but that doesn’t mean you have to do a spit take when you see him.”

“I was surprised,” Castiel says defensively as he desperately tries to regain his composure.

“Uh huh.” Charlie smirks, eyebrows waggling. “Want me to call him over? I don’t think he’s spotted us yet.”

Castiel swallows down the rising tide of panic in the back of his throat. For God’s sake, he’s nearly thirty years old. He can’t go to pieces over Dean Winchester, not again. 

It’s just been a while. He hasn’t had a boyfriend in several years. All his friends, Charlie included, are taken or aromantic, and lately Castiel’s been feeling like the odd bachelor out.

Dean probably isn’t all Castiel has been building up in his head. It’s been ten years, after all. Dean must have changed.

Castiel certainly has. He’s no longer the loner who filled his life with facts and grades instead of friends. Well, he still has school, but at least this time around he’s the one grading tests instead of being graded.

But it’s Dean. The one who got away - or ran away, in Dean’s case.

Charlie waves and calls Dean’s name, and, before Castiel can wrap his head around what’s happening, Dean is in front of them, in all his glory. Ten years older, but no less handsome. He still has those barely-there freckles splattered across his cheeks.

“So how’ve you been?” Dean asks Charlie.

“Can’t complain.” Charlie shakes her head. “I got a new haircut.”

“The bob suits you, Red,” Dean says, grinning as he reaches out to ruffle it.

Charlie dodges, one finger in his face in warning. “You touch it and you die, Handmaiden. It doesn’t look this natural naturally.”

“Fair,” Dean says, hands in the air.

Castiel watches them both, a sinking feeling in his gut. He’s been here before, watching from the sidelines as Dean joked and teased his friends. In the same room but also miles away.

He shouldn’t have expected any different.

Ten years, and nothing has changed.

But then Charlie punches Dean in the arm, throwing a significant look at Castiel, and Castiel’s mood sinks lower. He doesn’t need Charlie to make Dean pay attention to him; that wasn’t the point of coming here tonight.

“Hey, Cas,” Dean says quietly.

Castiel clears his throat. “Hello, Dean.”

Onto Part II

#destiel fanfic #fanfic #destiel #high school reunion #high school au #teacher castiel #flashbacks like woah #teacher dean #loner castiel #popular dean #human au #would you have me would you want me #the story of us verse #rae writes fic

[saawek]

Day 12 : Western/Cowboy

An AU where Sam and Dean left their home for a better life across the desert where they are attacked and lose everything. All seem lost if not for the surprise of seeing the legendary loner known as Cas (and admired by Dean). When he tells them he can help them well… they surely don’t say no.

Inktober Art Tag

#destiel #team free will #inktober #saawekinktober #saawek #castiel #destiel au #spn art #traditional #ink drawing #cowboy au #western au #cas is a badass loner with so much sexyness imma dead #and dean is kinda a twink here #again... #not on purpose! #twink!dean #scruffy!cas #child!sam #the beginning of s13 won't stop my inktober i swear #i'll try at least #smoking #cas smoking #supernatural #inktoberbunker

[french-vanilla-in-the-clouds]

✧.*  𝐌𝐀𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ✧.* || REQUESTS ARE OPEN!

**tell me in the comments if you would like to be tagged in anything!**

✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦

➤ General | @the-chaotic-cow @tuttifuckinfruttifriday @adaydreamaway08 @stitchintimefan @andthevillainshallrises @justyourlocalwhore @waiting-for-cas-to-save-me @leigh70 @cookiemumster1 @uncompletemasterpiece

-ˏˋ CHARACTER X READER! ˊˎ

➤ Dean | @eliwinchester99 ​

➤ Sam | @baby-bloos @danzalladaggers ​@diorrbrxtt @fuiabarcelos

➤ Cas | @starstruck-loner @moon-kiss3d @crazy-romanian

➤ Arthur Ketch |

➤ Gabriel | @crazy-romanian

-ˏˋ SERIES! ˊˎ

The Angel’s Flight (Reader x Castiel)  |  @lauraashley93 @cookiemumster1 @graceshifts @just-a-desparate-fangirl​ @justyourlocalwhore ​

The Winged Victory (A BBC SHERLOCK X SUPERNATURAL CROSSOVER) | @justanotheromen @jaseena ​ @jessiediegomax​

✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦

TO ALL THAT HAVE BEEN TAGGED - YOU’RE ALL SO GREAT!! *HUGS*

If you would like to be tagged in any of the lists above, just tell me in the comments! Either on this post or any of my fics! These are all the characters I’m working on (for now), so let me know because I would love to add you!

If you would like to be added in multiple lists, just say the word! This list is always changing!

#supernatural #supernatural fanfiction #castiel #sam winchester #dean winchester #sam winchester x reader #dean winchester x reader #castiel x reader #team free will #supernatural taglist