#like whats even the point honestly????

[thatdemiboymess]

Turning up the music to max volume and laying facedown on the bed because the mental health has hit rock bottom like DROWN IT OUT, DROWN IT OUT, DROWN IT OUT, DROWN IT OUT, DROWN IT OUT, DROWN IT OUT--

Thoughts of self harm and maybe suicidal ideation in the vent in the tags. Sorry.

#irl #vent #self harm mention #self harm #i am not having a good time today at all chat #my brain is giving me the itchy little localized signals in my wrists that are connected to the Bad Thoughts and Horrible Coping Mechanisms #and like honestly i feel like i should be fine but im not #shit sucks #almost started crying because i realized i forgot to grab some new exfoliating gloves while i was at the store #gonna be eating nothing but ramen and potatoes this month #im lonely and life feels like a really shitty time loop and im probably never gonna be able to get my cats and bring them here #because i need to somehow manage to save up $500 just for oet deposit and pet rent #when everything is month to month to month #i dont have any friends and i dont talk to my family and i sincerely feel like i could die and the only person that would know would be #my partner and even then thats because we live together #and when i do finally die its not like anyone will have known me #people that i should or used to be close with will find out eventually and theyll all call me by a name that isnt mine #using pronouns and words and descriptors that misrepresent me as a person #ect ect ECT #whatever #like whats even the point honestly???? #i dont know what im doing here i just feel like a huge burden to everyone around me #dssi is barely enough for groceries but its not like i can get a job near me being legally blind #im just a big ol burdensome money sink lolol #just an overly needy little waste of space #i dunno #i dont know shit anymore #im so fucking tired all the time man #im just #so tired

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

The girls are plottinggggg

[First] Prev <–-> Next

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #wen chao #wang lingjiao #Realizing she was supposed to have an upper lip mole was a cold slap in the face. So sorry ma'am. I won't forget again. #They are evil dumbass 4 evil dumbass and I think we are all missing out on the sheer potential of the comedy between these two. #They have way too much power and are using it for the wrong reasons - which makes them truly great villains. #And when things don't go their way they become piles of whining sludge. #Wang Lingjiao is forever fascinating to me even though we only get crumbs about her. #She's a servant girl who's greatest asset is her beauty and her attractiveness. #Meaning she's had a life being in the gaze of people with significant positions of power over her. #I can't help but read her childishness and petty tantrums as someone who has finally been given the chance to not feel powerless. #If she was a more virtuous type we might 'like' her more but honestly...I don't think she would have survived to this point. #WLJ has only known power hierarchies her whole life. Probably accused of seduction before she even understood what that meant. #I love contrasting her with mianmian because they have similar(ish) backgrounds but different approaches to moving forwards #But WLJ's story is about flying too close to the sun and mianmian's is about going too close to the water. #Like the sea mist dragging her down into complacency - all the sect powerplays are mandatory to 'go along with' if she wants to climb- #-the social ladder. Yet she is the cautionary tale (and a foil to JGY as well) she leaves before sacrificing her own morals. #Mianmian flies away with her wings only slightly plucked while those who sacrificed everything to reach for the top crash and burn.

[solarpunkani]

"Oh no, someone's attracted to the aesthetics of my -punk movement but doesn't know the praxis and history behind it like I do--"

OK. Tell them. Make it a teaching moment. Everyone who's in your movement learned the background from somewhere at some point, maybe this is that point for that person. Give them a jumping off point that they can dive into later.

"Oh but I shouldn't be responsible for teaching baby -punks about the history and the how-tos and--"

OK. Then don't tell them. You don't have to be responsible for teaching people with a budding interest in your group the ins and outs and how-tos. That's fair and valid! It can be a lot of work. Someone else will handle it

"But I'm annoyed that they would try to claim to be part of/be interested in my community without knowing all the details that I know after being in it for months/years/decades, they're dumb, they're posers, they're--"

OK. Then don't engage with them, if it's that bad. Maybe someone else will come around and tell them the history, maybe they'll pick it up on their own, maybe they'll just enjoy the fashion elements for awhile.

"But they shouldn't claim to be part of the -punk community if they don't know the--"

I feel like we have a few options here. People can either talk to them, share the history, share the values, share the praxis. Or they can just chase off anyone who even thinks about dipping a toe in their community, and then wonder why it's dying off later down the line.

I dunno, maybe I'm too naive and patient or whatever. But if people are entering your -punk spaces without knowing The Rundown of what you feel they need to know, maybe being nice about it and informing people instead of immediately assuming stupidity and malicious intent could help you make a new friend. Even the loudest voices in a space had to learn from somewhere, and not everyone has the luxury of being in the space as the History was Happening--whether it's an age thing or a not being aware of the space thing. Or maybe I just don't see what the big deal is behind people hating people who like the aesthetic of something and don't know the behind the scenes history about it yet.

Because I believe in the word 'yet.' No one comes into this world knowing everything about everything, and we're all constantly learning new things. I'm not gonna degrade someone and call them a poser for not knowing what I know. Because if it were me, interested in a scene but getting chased out and called a poser? I wouldn't hit the books and study up, I'd go 'that fuckin sucks, those people sucked' and then avoid anyone and anything having to do with it.

So chase people off and call them posers if you want. But if your community starts dwindling, don't be fucking shocked.

#out of queue #ani rambles #punks and posers #i cant even call this a 4am hot take because its 7pm but like #idk i keep seeing posts about like 'how DARE people think I bought my punk clothes how DARE they not know the how-tos and DIYs' #or 'ugh people only care about the ~aesthetics~ of my movement if you don't know shit get out of here' and like #maybe I'm just a shy ass introverted nerd whos scared of social rejection! but I avoid that shit like the plague #so if someone were to reject me based on not knowing about something I'd never even heard about? something i was JUST getting into? #there's a high chance I'd just scram and never look back. i don't wanna be the one who causes that emotion in someone else #granted this is coming from someone who STILL doesn't know how to make her own patches or worked up the courage to do direct action praxis #outside of offering neighbors to my tomatoes and trying to talk to people about what I'm passionate about #but still imo unless someone's a malicious intentional bad actor i dont see the point in scaring newbies off #thats how movements die imo #i know this is my solarpunk blog but its not a solarpunk specific thing #i think the main post that inspired this was about store-bought versus self-made spiked leather jackets #which honestly just feels petty to me but who knows. #might delete later

[turtleblogatlast]

Something I like about Leo is that he’s honestly really chill? It’s easy to remember the moments where he’s being obnoxious or excitable but I feel like most of the time he’s incredibly “go with the flow” and has an overall affable demeanor.

#rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt leo #rise leo #Genuinely speaking I feel like said demeanor is incredibly useful for when he has to charm and/or persuade people into listening to him #I have a whole post talking about Leo’s charm and how he consistently gets people to hear him out even if he’s annoyed or upset them #like they’ll still listen to what he has to say in full #his charisma stat is real and utilized quite often in this series I swear he’s not just a loser cringeboy all the time 😭 #if he wants to persuade and/or charm then he honestly sooo often does #me listing the 400th reason why Leo grows up to be the worlds best ninja and a good 365 of those reasons are Leo’s various subterfuge skill #Like most episodes where he’s not the main focus (and even many where he is) #he’s a voice of reason who notices things quickly and is often the one taking point to talk down situations #something interesting I found between Leo and Mikey is that #Mikey tells people what they need to hear #Leo tells people what they want to hear #not only out of his own agenda either #when bullhop was wrecking their home leo was the one that negotiated to make the situation go smoother #even if he would have rather bullhop left #meanwhile Mikey is the one who bluntly tells things as it is #small character moment that means a lot to me #Mikey is an honest boy who is upfront about his feelings #Leo prefers to let people make their own decisions he wants them to through steering the convo in that direction #but he is easily cowed by guilt #regardless leo is a people person - he knows how to talk to them and how to manipulate/persuade #and I like that his bros know this and often push him forward to do the talking if they wanna charm someone into doing what they want #I think Leo’s hope speeches are also an example of this - he’s saying what people really want to hear (and often it’s ALSO what they NEED) #the further the series goes on the higher Leo’s inner stress rises and he just keeps that chill aura anyway #there’s a reason!!! he wanted to go to a SPA so badly!! #literally the first thing he does when he gets in is rest #no joke meditation would do him good? like- it’s a Leo thing and I genuinely think rise leo would be no different here

[jaegerbroshoe]

Rewatching the finale, Jinx is actually a lot more self-aware than people make her out to be. I find it funny how people say Silco manipulated her into becoming Jinx when she herself reveals that his words over the years weren’t what shaped her into this. She even recognizes that he projects his trauma onto her. So like… I don’t think she was manipulated. She’s not oblivious.

#also if silco really manipulated her she wouldn’t have wanted to reconcile with vi #like at all #and honestly #I think even if sevika and silco hadn’t said what they said her insecurities would have tainted the reunion because of caitlin #jinx wants vi all to herself so anything she deems a threat to that would have set her off #anyhow my point is silco’s speeches don’t seem to have brainwashed her like people claim because she still holds her own opposing opinions #maybe she gets influenced by them momentarily but she still has her own free will #it’s not manipulation if you’re aware someone is trying to influence you #and ekko even says jinx chooses to stay with silco #it even sounds like she was offered the choice and rejected going with ekko #arcane #jinx #silco #my opinion #lol I’m sure this is a controversial take #but silco never forced her to stay with him

[jondoe279]

atp i genuinely doooon’t care if the old guard two is the worst thing put to film i just want to see the best character of all time (andromache the scythian) and her loser henchmen and everyone’s favorite girl nile freeman again

#its not even funny anymore WHERE IS ANDY AND NORIKO!!!!!!!!!!! it was supposed to be the year of dyke drama 😞😞😞😞😞😞 #like given the way they structured the first movie the second would have to be almost wholly original and differ a lot from the comic #like andy cant go thru the shit noriko puts her thru so im guessing the script would switch her out with nile getting tossed in the ocean #but that doesnt really work with norikos comic characterization (trying to get andy to see her point by making her go thru what noriko did #isnt something quynh will gaf about if andy isnt one of the immortals. andys become thr ‘vermin’ noriko hates!!!) #and given the end of the movie everyones chill with copley so joe and nickys whole subplot cant exist anymore…. idk maybe theyll switch out #copley with moose?? idc as long as we get their stupid car conversation tbh makes me laugh #honestly given the changes that would have to be made they probably just made a stupid movie and don’t want to release it. but I DONT CAREEE #its not exactly like the first one was that good i still mute it in preparation for every cringe needle drop like its a lame movie but its #genuineeeeee fun like i seriously do not care netflix give me my movie!!! #the old guard

[bogos-bint3d]

This was better in my head

Also I just want to see them happy so bonus

#you can tell i kinda just gave up with erasing asriel at one point #so yeah he looks kinda weird it doesnt really matter #undertale #bogos i binted #i made this instead of working on my ut anniversary art #chara dreemurr #asriel dreemurr #the ipod brothers #what do i even tag this as #like honestly #ut #utdr #ut/dr #chara #asriel #chara undertale #asriel undertale #pacifist route #genocide route #undertale fanart #?

[sysig]

Ah, childhood memories (Patreon)

#Doodles #UT #Handplates #Sans #Gaster #Having such clear external-view memories of what happened when they were young would probably give Sans a lot of ammunition lol #Not that they'd know any different - their poor memories honestly :( - but having such clear memories in places would have to be weird #Most people have childhood amnesia to an extent! Tho it's hard to say when that would've applied to them anyway with their sped-up growth #Not to mention the trauma #And it's possible that doesn't apply to Monsters to begin with lol - but it's all a moot point anyway since these are their only memories! #It's sad to think of how much of themselves are missing forever since Gaster didn't experience them :( #This is what happens when you get behind on your work >:0 #I really wonder what their lack of memories/restoration of memories would do for their like/dislike of certain things! #Like how Papyrus says that sitting with Sans in his lap makes a lot of sense as to why it was so familiar and comforting #But also that knowing makes it sad as well :( Knowing recolours their understanding and interpretation! #Knowing Why makes things make sense but does it actually Help? It's a tough question - certainly it hurts in the moment #The little things Gaster has infected for them and for himself ♥ Like taking notes! Like chess and sweets and spaghetti and lab coats #And dark sweaters and cigarette smoke and hugs and intelligence - how many pieces of all of them have A Feeling attached #How many more have A Memory - and even more than that A Memory Lost and unrecoverable ughhh ♥ #But the little things they can hold on to hehe <3 Like pinging Gaster for what they all know and remember #Why does he even keep coming over if he knows the reception he'll get? Lol #Feels particularly self-loathing and goes to get bullied as penance pfft

[scopophobia-polaris]

I didn't even conclude my Ganondorf thoughts on Bloo's poll like an idiot

#i think hes a scary villain in TP because by that point hes lost everything #including his life #so what does he have to lose here #like.....tp is a dark game when it gets down to it #like #people are like ah yes the art style #and yeah the art style is mature or whatever but surface level game is goofy #THEN YOU READ #anyways #i think TP Ganondorf in theory is scarier then most Ganondorfs #like....motivation wize #i really dont see whats so scary about a man trying to gain ultimate power ro rule over the country whos fucked him over for years #honestly its so funny seeing TotK ganondorf oh god #not scary at ALL #LAME EVEN

[cyravillaria]

Ok so.. ive decided to draw the Dimitrescu sisters.. it will most definitely take me a while to finish bc of school😭😭😭

Ok ik dani is here... But I've decided to do bela first (ahem) not like that you nasty😤 (i aint no different-)

Anyways-

Dani might be in my gallery for a while. so i might as well post her sketch so far, i might tweak or change things up a bit but i like how things are for now🫰

(welp amma do Angie's route, ive seen snippets of her route here on Tumblr and LWBDBWKFBWLDJ its so fucking cute AHHHHHH)

#resident lover #daniela dimitrescu #mc #being gay asf #RL #honestly i cannot stop thinking about Daniela's abs #LWNDOABROBQODBQLFB #like gurl whenever she appears on screen the first thing i see is her abs #at this point i ain't even looking at her face #shes butiful dont get me wrong its just that #its just THERE #how can i not look at it?? #SORRY DANI #ik im doing bela first but I still love you 🫰 #getting references for this was a joy lol i mean if looking at pretty woman aint a joy idk what is

[arsenicflame]

i Do Not Trust people who make Mary the bad guy in their stories when the show went out of its way to specifically show us how she was suffering just as much as stede was in their marriage and that shes, yknow, a good person

#mary is specifically framed in a sympathetic light in all of her appearances. the show switches to following her narrative so we can see #how much better her new life is for her too!!! like yes she tries to kill stede but we are shown in the narrative WHY she makes that choice #and that she struggles with it and we see stede understanding this too! he supports her decisions and her new life and is happy for her!!! #at no point are we shown anything that makes mary a bad person or bad mother- honestly i generally like mary far more than stede anyway #but even if you dont you should be able to acknowledge... that if u make her the bad guy??? w. what did you take away from the show?? #idk it has the vibes of. the girl character all the fans hate because she gets in the way of their precious little gay ship #or whatever. you know what i mean #ofmd #our flag means death #mary bonnet #mary allamby bonnet #everyone whos a mary hater is also an izzy hater bc theyre coded the same character type. betrayed wives my beloved #(this is a joke.) #uh. this might be one to add in the tags on again sorry gang i have too many thoughts

[5oz-mud]

we project our tummy issues on trant heidelstam like MEN. (based off a tiktok i can no longer find)

#this looks so needlessly edgy with the black text boxes n pills n shit. ITS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY GUYS . ITS JUST TUMS. IBS WARRIORS RISE. #jean vicquemare #trant heidelstam #disco elysium #honestly i thik at this point in time i dont even want to color things anymore i just straight up like how the black n white looks better. #can you tell i didnt know what the fuck to do for the interior of the car so i just like made a bunch of random buttons and knobs n lines.?

[unforth]

Hey if you're a white person (as I am too!) and reading the stuff about End OTW Racism (@end-otw-racism) is making you uncomfortable CONGRATULATIONS THATS THE POINT bipoc have been uncomfortable in fandom for decades and some of yall can't face being uncomfortable for five seconds and still have the gall to have shit like BLM in your descriptions.

Put your money where your mouth is. Be uncomfortable. Actually read what they're talking about and what changes they're proposing instead of jumping right to BuT wHaT aBoUt My DaRk FiC (they want to protect your dark fic and help ensure you're safer from harassment over it!)and ThEy'Re PrO-cEnSoRsHiP (they are explicitly not).

I'm so fucking tired of having my posts and those I reblog on this topic largely ignored on my personal account, but ESPECIALLY I'm furious about how ignored posts on racism in fandom are when I put them on the danmei art sideblogs.

I see racism every single fucking DAY as part of running those accounts. This isn't some nebulous thing happening elsewhere, this is us!

If you don't care, I really need you to take a long hard look in the mirror and ask yourself WHY DONT I CARE?

Because YOU SHOULD FUCKING CARE.

#unforth rambles #end racism in the otw #end otw racism #i was already at my breaking point on this issue a month ago when i started talking more about microaggressions in the mdzs tag #now seeing how impossible it is to get people to give a shit ive moved to fucking FURIOUS #WHY ARENT MORE PEOPLE ANGRY I DONT UNDERSTAND #(i do understand #its racism taking rhe form of complacency and disinterest #from people who have the privilege to ignore it because it makes them uncomfortable and doesnt harm them directly #im honestly gettibg so disgusted #do better white fandom) #im a jewish white woman with biracial kids #it horrifies me to realize that im genuinely not sure if the circles im in would be safe for my half black kids to join #im genuinely not sure i can let my kids join fandom when they get old enough #for fear of what they'll be exposed to here #do yall even realize what a fucking indictment that is? #note this is mostly not aimed at my mutuals #yall are awesome and ilu #but i only have about 75 mutuals #what about the rest of my 1900 followers like wtf guys

[paintbrushnebula]

Im currently rewatching How to Train Your Dragon and it’s absolutely slaying me how Hiccup delivers the opening narration like he’s in therapy right now and like maybe the whole movie is actually just a recollection of recent traumatic events that he's venting about to a therapist

#like that was the first thing he did once he woke up from his coma #I guess Stoick really swallowed his pride and let hiccup go to therapy #can't imagine how embarrassed he'd be #a VIKING going to THERAPY??? SACRILEGIOUS #like can you IMAGINE #you know how it is with Vikings #they're all stoicism #I bet they don't even HAVE therapy #so I honestly don't know what I was thinking here #but anyway point is Jay Burachel deserves an OSCAR for his opening narration alone #how to train your dragon #httyd #hiccup and toothless #hiccup haddock #hiccup how to train your dragon #toothless #dreamworks

[apk02]

All fic writers writing Sirius and James needing help from Lupin for passing exams and making the charmed mirrors and every other achievement S & J did should just tag their fics as OOC and be done with it.

Sirius and James were incredibly intelligent and accomplished individuals and this shit of wrong tagging and ooc characters is getting really annoying now.

#sirius black #james potter #harry potter #its canon that they were smart #its canon that they were creative and top of the class #flying motorcycle anyone? #and the thing is its not only ships which have remus which is doing it. i just saw a prongsfoot fic which had this #why? why would you make your characters dumb? what will it achieve? what is the point here #prongsfoot #and its not only one thing you know #who charmed the mirrors? apparently lupin. who got the potion for the animagus? apparently lupin #who got the spell for the map? apparently lupin. who did they copy their homework from or who helped them study? apparently lupin #And I honestly liked Lupin in the books. He was relatable even if he was a bit of a coward but who isn't right? #But fanon Lupin is someone i have started hating so much

[wild-magic-oops]

I like to hc that Durge heals abnormally quickly but now I also think he should be able to regenerate body parts just to make him even more unsettling due to what he is. He knocks out a tooth and it just grows back the next day. A finger? No problem. Bigger parts like a whole hand take longer to regenerate but so far anything that wouldn't kill him will grow back just fine.

I've seen some hcs that Durge acts like a cat and leaves Gortash body parts and whatnot, and what better present than his own child-of-a-god bodyparts?

#durgetash #durge #the dark urge #gortash #poor gortash honestly lmao #also what a better snack for durge than his own bodyparts lmao #tw for everything ever at this point asdfg #tw: gore #tw: mutilation #tw: cannibalism #what else ??? #tw: durge lmao #I'm going to the dentist tomorrow to fix my tooth and this just spiraled into this whole thing #did I finally post smth so weird that even the durgetash crowd won't like? we'll find out