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composeregg · 1 year

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disclaimer: I am a volunteer for the OTW. I am speaking for myself, not on behalf of the organization, anything expressed here is my own. I may be wrong about some things, I'm very much not involved in any of this as part of my work. Additionally, I haven't run this by anyone else in the org, so take that as you will. I'm just a person, hoping to reassure other people, fans like myself.

A few people have come to me asking questions about this, and asking clarification already, so I just.... Want to reassure everyone. A lot of people follow me and know I volunteer, even if I don't talk about it much.

No, Ao3/OTW is not endorsing AI. Scraping is not being allowed or encouraged (you can, in fact, see here in this link, the code of Ao3 disallowing scraping). There is only so much the organization can do to prevent this. If you set your works to logged-in users only, it does somewhat give more protections. Data miners are very proactive, and prevention measures can only do so much. After the data is harvested, with or without consent, it is that much harder to pry back and out of those hands.

Many, MANY people are panicking. They saw an excerpt of an interview in this week's OTW Signal news roundup. This interview was from someone on the legal team of the OTW. She was speaking not for the organization, but as someone with credentials in the fields being discussed. Much of this has been misinterpreted and relayed second-hand. It was a conversation primarily about trademarks and AI.

I don't know the course the OTW is going to take regarding AI with the law, myself. That's not my field whatsoever. I can say, how would we even have the TIME or ABILITY to "develop an AI to be integrated with AO3" as some people speculate? It took our volunteer coders years to work out a block/mute function and get it from idea through testing to implementation.

The OTW does not want to just feed everyone's fanfic into AI. The organization may end up taking a middle-ground stance on the legality of AI and AI-generated creations. I don't think that Disney would care much for the distinction between "This is an AI generated item infringing on our trademark, remove it" versus "This is a fan-made item infringing on our trademark, remove it." The legality of AI versus fan creations is a very tricky topic, and from my understanding, that was the focus of the interview and what was being discussed (along with some other ideas).

Protecting the right to fanfiction and fan creations existing is the primary goal, and navigating new, emerging technologies that could find similar arguments, whether or not people at the org agree with them, means they may end up protecting them somewhat. This is not a betrayal of fandom. Every volunteer is an individual, and opinions within the org are all over the place, but we are all fans as well, and we don't want random bots just lifting all our fics and creations without any say-so either.

The topic of AI is a landmine right now, and I do think it was insensitive and ignorant of the current fandom/political sphere to highlight something like that interview, especially in the way it was done. It immediately led to panic, distrust in the org, and people spinning off numerous infeasible ideas because they simply do not have information, and hear rumors or don't parse a conversation about legalese well (I know I had trouble with it! A lot of my understanding comes from reading discussion about it myself). Nuance is important, as is the fact that nothing is ever published or discussed in a vacuum.

I don't blame anyone for having misinformation, I get it. It can be hard to find correct info. Transparency is something the org is not always great at (it's being worked on! Everyone is aware it's an issue! We are just very,,,,, very slow at implementing changes, as a volunteer-run organization). Time is the OTW's most valuable resource, and we are constantly, constantly in demand and in need of more time and manpower. It can make communications difficult, and very stressing.

The OTW is a non-profit, it is not selling any data. It does not want to sell your data. The money it makes is solely from donations. There is not going to be any selling to AI, there is not going to be any attempt to implement AI for the OTW itself.

Honestly, beyond that, I'm super not qualified to talk about the legal aspects of everything in the article/interview. I don't know all the inner workings of the org, I don't know all the thoughts and opinions and legal stances. I don't even know all the nuances of AI legal issues myself. I just know that I don't think it can replace creativity, and that it could be a fascinating tool in a better world (but I do not trust how it could be used here and now).

I hope this helps anyone who sees it. I hope that this is a reassurance, and that maybe it will help people feel better. I know panic is a powerful force, and I know there is a great distrust in any organization even mentioning AI (usually for valid reasons!). I know information can be hard to find, and legal discussions hard to read, I've been there with the org myself.

But the OTW is a group of people trying their best to make sure that fandom has protections. There are like, a thousand of us or something. Not all of us are going to agree on everything, but we all agree fans deserve a space to create and have those creations protected. One of the inciting incidents of its founding was a hatred of the idea of some company trying to profit off of fanworks with complete disregard for the fans themselves.

The OTW was founded to prevent fans from being taken advantage of, and to protect fandom's right to exist. It is never going to betray that core tenet. Partially because we're all fans ourselves and have a vested interest in keeping it that way, but additionally: This organization is nothing without its volunteers, and if someone high up on the board or something genuinely tried, we would know and we would make ourselves known.

(Just look into the Board Election of 2015!)

#otw #organization for transformative works #ao3 #archive of our own #ao3 discourse #egg speaks #ao3 blogging #otw blogging #I will turn off reblogs if people try to start shit #also if staff tells me I fucked up then like. I will delete this tbc #I just. want to say something. I'm just some person #but I don't want other people to feel like they need to panic #or be afraid #or take down their works #also this feels repetitive but yolo

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onceamadhouse13 · 1 year

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The Gaylor Issue: An Attempt at Nuance from a Very Tired Queer

I feel like the Gaylor issue is so divisive and polarizing in the Swiftie fandom. I want to make space for nuance, acceptance, and a more relaxed conversation. And I want to make space for fans who don’t fit on either extreme end of the issue.

On one side, you have diehard Gaylors who insist that Taylor is OBVIOUSLY gay and that all her “boyfriends,” including Joe, have been beards. See also: Kaylor, Swiftgron, etc.

On the other side, you have the people who insist that Gaylors are delusional, her relationship with Joe is real, and Taylor is nothing more than an ally to the LGBTQ community. Side note: I really dislike the term “hetlor” because a) it feels mean and gross when said in a demeaning way, and b) believing she’s straight is the default so I feel like giving them their own term is in the realm of “straight pride.”

Sprinkled between these camps are the people who say stuff like, “It’s weird and gross to speculate about real people’s sexuality. Taylor is a private person and it isn’t our place to talk about her love life.” Or, “Speculating about people’s queerness is bad because it forces people out of the closet before they’re ready.” Which is very kind.

I feel like I don’t fit into either of these three groups.

Saying “Taylor’s relationship with Joe is fake” feels really dismissive of bisexuality. Bi people are the biggest segment of the LGBTQ community and somehow it seems like people forget they exist because they float in that middle ground. When we view the world through binaries, bi people seem like they’re full of contradictions. But, like all people, bi people just contain multitudes.

Saying Taylor is straight seems downright ridiculous, at least to me. The most obvious, “no heterosexual explanation for this” pieces of evidence are: the song Paris, the lyric “I swear you could hear a hairpin drop,” the 13 in northern Michigan in the Lavender Haze music video, and the idea that gay pride “makes me ME.” Here are some things I believe to be true: 1) If Taylor Swift were straight, she’d be too good of an ally to queerbait, and 2) Taylor Swift is too smart/well-read to make queer references accidentally.

The thing about the “don’t speculate about her personal life” argument is that speculating about Taylor Swift’s personal life pays her bills. Yes, she’s making and selling art. But she has chosen a life in the spotlight. She has consciously decided to sell her [personhood, brand, name, soul, whatever you want to call it]. She has chosen NOT to “take the money and her dignity and get the hell out.” She COULD choose the rose garden over Madison Square. But every day, she chooses not to. On the one hand, this “don’t speculate” argument is very noble. But there’s some part of me that wonders if the folks in this camp see themselves as potential future friends of Taylor and think that being speculative ruins their chances at that, ruins their chances of attending a secret session, etc. It’s sweet and kind AND it feels a little “pick me.” Here are some things I believe to be true: 1) If Taylor Swift were straight, she wouldn’t be offended that people think she is queer. 2) If Taylor Swift is queer, she’s not offended that people think she is queer.

And then there’s this weird, in-between camp that I fall into. Personally, I think Taylor Swift is a queer woman who is currently in a legitimate, long term relationship with her boyfriend Joe Alwyn. Do I think that she had relations of some kind with Karlie Kloss? Yeah, probably! Do I think that she is afraid to come out for fear of outing past lovers? Yeah, probably! Do I think she is afraid to come out for fear of alienating part of her fanbase? Yeah, probably! Do I think she is afraid to come out because she feels like her current relationship with a man will “delegitimize” her queerness? Definitely.

I want a label for people who have this opinion, because I see SO much hatred toward “Gaylors” from “Hetlors” and vice versa. I feel like I have a nuanced, reasonable, rational take on the situation. And I want to be able to communicate this nuanced take with a label.

Here are my suggestions.

Nuance Gaylor

Pro-Joe Gaylor

We Contain Multitudes Gaylor

Gaylor (Joe’s Version)

Please don’t be mad at me Gaylor

Anyway, thank you for reading this. Please feel free to chime in but please don’t send me hate mail.

#gaylor #taylor swift #kaylor #swifties #queer #lgbtq #bi #gay #feminism #gaylor swift #karlie kloss #joe alwyn

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elderflowergin · 9 days

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blood free v secret forest, a quick and dirty comparison:-

As someone who fell for Kdrama through Stranger, i loved it because it appeared seamless, grounded and weaved several systems and levels of privilege very elegantly. Most of all it seemed morally urgent, even if it was at its core a detective mystery. (Which, to be fair, Blood Free is as well.)

Secret Forest’s first success was that it held nuance for everyone in the middle of the road; LSY afforded so much thoughtful shading to those men. I often think they will never look as beautiful as they do on SF, and that’s only partly because of whoever did the lighting etc, but they’re not Kdrama glossy perfect; they’re real people trying to reckon with themselves and the moral calculus they have agreed to, and their dignity comes from the reckoning. Lee Chang-joon, Kang Won-chul, Lee Yeon-jae, even Seo Dong-jae for that matter, all have that advantage. LSY managed this for Jung Sung-il in the scant few minutes of screen time he had.

The second success was Cho Seung-woo and Bae Doona. If Secret Forest was a universe they were its gravitational field; it was their fierce sense of honour and morality that drives both seasons. And their moral decency is hard-won; it is tested constantly, and it’s burnished at each opportunity, which is why they are respected. It is a dream that people like that can influence or impact those around them, but you don’t question that they do, by the end of each season, and that’s the victory of writing, casting and the charisma of both leads.

That’s why that funeral scene in season 1 is so important (to me); it shows the gravity shifting. The prosecutors rely on their forest of secrets to keep the centre together, but Hwang Si-mok demonstrates how untenable this has become, how the roots must be pulled out so the weeds die; so new healthy things can grow. The chaebols are at the periphery, and they continue to be there because, most audaciously of all, they don’t matter if enough people shift their moral calculus. I think this gravitational pull happens to Lee Chang-joon in season 1 thanks to Hwang Si-mok and it happens to Choi Bit in season 2 thanks to Han Yeo-jin. They are easily some of the most powerful parts of the show.

On the other hand, we have Blood Free. I’m not sure who the moral gravitational field of this show is meant to be. Maybe it’s Yun Ja-yu and/or Woo Chae-woon. Maybe it’s Lee Mu-saeng. Maybe it’s about the ethical dilemma of experimentation and whether that’s a worthwhile price to pay for the scientific advancements in cultured meat and seafood. Perhaps we need more time to really see the middle of the road characters, but four episodes in there’s not much to go on: there’s Lee Mu-saeng, there’s Queen Dowager as a VP, here’s Jeon Seok-ho. There are three chaebols, all of whom seem like one-note characters to me. (Why ask a talented sketch artist to produce cartoons like these? Unless they’re not, but nothing seems to suggest otherwise.)

The most interesting insight from episode 4 was about Yun Jayu - when offered 72 trillion won for her company, she actually considers it because it means she doesn’t have to face investors and can focus on research. She has influence and money but these are means to an end, for her. I wish we could see more of that, and not necessarily through exposition alone.

When she gives deft, cool answers to reporters, did that come naturally to her or did she work at it? Is she the face of the company because she hated it a little less than Lee Mu-saeng did? If so, why? What comparative advantage did they determine she had? When she wears Chanel tweed skirts and smiles her way through presentations, is that a natural extension of her work or is that a mask she wears? Give me process, guys! Give us the backstory, the way the markets work, the environment for cutting-edge bio research in Korea, the reaction of Big Meat, the interplay of new rich and old rich, some indication of her actual influence (which must be considerably more than what we see on the show, although what little we see, while uncomfortable, is frankly not that inconceivable in a world where you’re constantly connected.) I am so interested in her, and yet I feel I am made to watch the story of her reacting to chaebols and to the mystery of corporate sabotage rather than her being the fulcrum of her own universe. And at no point does the mystery seem morally urgent to me, and it’s because 1) why does it matter if all this is is a giant M&A negotiation 2) why should we care if it doesn’t feel real to us? So what if there’s sabotage? Why on earth isn’t this company guarded like fucking Fort Knox? Why is this company ostensibly so influential, so powerful and yet capable of unusually amateurish errors that are the centre of the show so far and not on the periphery of it? Where is the moral quandary that is meant to grab us by the throat?

Is it a question of the writing? Have her interests shifted and did she want to do a show without having to do too much character work? If anyone has earned a vibes-only moment it’s Lee Soo-yeon, and I respect that for her. I hope the direction isn’t stifling the writing, because that means there is an arresting, politically trenchant drama underneath this dry procedural, and that’s upsetting to consider. We still have a ways to go and I think there is potential, but I have to remind myself not to expect something like SF, that maybe you can’t bottle that formula. That it’s the gold standard for a reason. But honestly, Disney, in the words of TikTok star imo_unusual, you’ve made this show like God was dozing off when the angels were working, now RELEASE US (and LSY writernim)

#sorry i didn’t finish life #and I didn’t include grid in the analysis #although that’s a good comparison to make too #but kudos to whoever costumed hhj #and gave her that expensive overcoat #that looks exactly like a doctor’s coat but in rich black #costuming is the only dept that has not been interfered with #blood free #tvn stranger

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laf-outloud · 6 months

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User real-girl replied to this post saying "Why even come here with this?" I can tell you why. They can't think for themselves, so they assume we can't either. They consider anything MC or JA says (WHEN it suits them) to be gospel. If it doesn't suit them, they flock like mindless sheep to one of top scammers, uh sorry leaders, to repeat what they said. I love Jared. You love Jared. My fellow Jared lovers love Jared. That doesn't mean we take everything he says as gospel. We can disagree with him, or have reservations on his opinions (like being way too nice about his haters, for one).

I love Jared. So do you. So do my fellow Jared lovers. We know there are sad people out there who hate him for lies spread by AAs and Hellers. We know there are people for whom he is simply not their favorite celebrity. Our reaction is at most a shrug. Who cares? Their loss. True, we are absolutely gobsmacked that's how they feel, but in the end who cares? We don't go around their blogs yelling that they're wrong about not liking him, and he's the best, and how they should go and look up everything Jensen said about him (which is a lot of good things, but we know they only hunt for what Jensen says about Misha or their ship). That is something AAs and Hellers are just biologically physically incapable of doing, and I am speaking literally here. I'm not exaggerating or being dramatic. They are in a cult. They're brainwashed. People in a cult are groomed to think if you're not one of them, then you're against them. There is no middle ground or nuance. That's the difference between them and us. And that's why they will keep coming to our blogs with what THEY think is proof that Jensen is an angel on earth.

You read my mind! I just responded in another post asking if anon is saying the same things on Jared-hating blogs. I doubt it. And I don't send asks to Jared-hating blogs (or more recently, Gen-hating blogs that have gone off the deep end,) I stay in my lane and don't engage people that I know won't agree with me. It's really that simple, don't like, don't read, don't engage.

And yes, we are perfectly willing to disagree with Jared. Matter of fact, most recently, I'm questioning the Padalecki's decision to have Highland cows in the Texas heat. And there might be other things I disagree with, but I also know that sharing those will just add fuel to the Jared-hater's fire because they do not understand thinking for one's self, or that disagreeing with one decision doesn't mean I don't like Jared or Gen any less.

"There is no middle ground or nuance." This, right here, is what it all boils down to.

#ask box #anti aas #anti hellers #anti jared haters

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loudlyunladylike · 8 months

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why do u like taylor swift?? /gen

I have very nuanced and complex thoughts about Taylor Swift that I may not even be able to fully express properly here so bare with me (I just woke up)

This is also me just briefly touching on the topic without adding every possible thought and detail or else we'll be here all day so spare me a bit of good faith

Like if we're talking baseline why do I like her, idk I like her music, I think the work she's putting into about owning her own work is very cool and touches on bigger issues on the music industry, I grew up with the music, she's a phenomenal performer, I think she's very talented in a lot of fields, the way she just keeps breaking records and producing top hit after top hit is insane, she's seems like a generally nice and decent person on a personal level, tons of that stuff which isn't gonna be much different from why you like any other artist, etc etc

That being said I also think the place she stands in as like the face of white liberal women and white feminism is a very interesting one as she very perfectly balances on this little middle ground that both serves to benefit and condemn her; where she is forever going to being criticized (with varying levels of validity) for being too political on one side and not political enough from the other, etc. I think people who are expecting Taylor Swift to stand up and discuss leftist policy are chasing a bit of a pipe dream, because Taylor Swift isn't that and if she was she would not be able to exist as this billionaire, pop empire that she is today (and her and her team are most definitely extremely aware of that). She's not a bigot or anything but expecting her to bring about the revolution and be anything but a another massive pop star feels a bit silly at this stage.

I also think there's something to be said about how the intensity of a fan space can effect and contribute to this in a particular way but I'm not getting into that today.

TL:DR: I listen to her music, I really like a lot of it, I even have fucking Eras Tour tickets booked, she's seems like a decent enough human being but I have other people I'm gonna look to for my politics (including my own critical thought)

#i study philosophy politics ethics at university is it obvious #i hope that made any sense whatsoever #like i don't like her ducking private jet but I also think more often than not the internet turns any meaningful conversation that could be #had into a ''fuck taylor swift!!'' train rather than a ''fuck billionaires!!'' one #screaming crying praying people to use critical thought #ask box

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card-queen · 11 months

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Story Craft: Character Basics

Ahoy and welcome. Characters won the poll so I'll start my guide by going over how I go about creating and developing characters. Before I begin, I'll be using my own characters as examples. Not because they're especially good or shining examples of this or that, but simply because I created them and I 100% know how and why I created them. So if you go through this and think "um, that doesn't sound very interesting" then first of all, 'WOW OK RUDE MEAN AND CRUEL ALSO', but second of all (and much more importantly), that's good and I encourage you to keep a hold of those feelings. Stories and crafting stories are completely to taste and one person's fine is another person's too much. Stories all about capturing and recapturing feelings, so if something doesn't hit the mark then it's good to take a look and figure out where it went wrong, where you might have gone or if the whole thing wasn't to your taste at all.

And now...

Characters!

Everyone loves characters and has favourites, least favourites and enjoys dreaming up new scenarios or even alternate universes to put them in! Crack open a how-to book and they'll probably have a more mechanical view of characters as tools of the plot, designed to elicit reactions and progress events... or something else really dry and with all the joy of a tier list for cutlery. The truth is that characters ARE made with a mechanical use in mind... but they're also the beating heart of the story and the world. And there is a lot of fun to be had in really hammering out the technical aspects of characters, and I'm here to show you!

Part 1: The Basics

Characters should contain three components: Personality, Purpose and Perspective.

Personality is who they are, how they make us feel and how they get on with other characters. This is the most readily understood aspect of characters and often what people create for their early OCs or ones that don't have a story. This is where you'd put their personality basics, MBTI, enneagram, etc.

Purpose is what they do in their story, what roles they perform and what themes they embody. This is the most mechanical aspect that all the books want you to understand. This is where you'd put their archetype or tropes you associate with them.

Perspective is their place in the world and their role in society. This is kind of a middle-ground between personality and purpose as both their actions and attitude can be shaped by their place in the world, obligations or upbringing, but by give it a category of its own, we can have more fun and ensure that every character has a healthy amount of entertainment potential.

A quick word on 'theme' that I've learned over time. Don't stress out too much if you haven't figured out the key theme(s) of your story, it's something that comes with time and work. I've found that people talking about theme often end up making it sound more like a preachy underlying message that permeates your work and I can't help but feel that, despite their efforts to say 'don't make it preachy'... it's gonna come across as preachy more times than not. For me, theme is something that ends up being core to your main character's struggle and it's something that a lot of other characters and story elements can have their own angle on, deepen the issues or show a path towards growth. I didn't figure out my theme until I was going through all the things going on with my main character and noticed that a lot of characters have deep issues with these things too. These things come with time, just keep at it and remember to give yourself time away from work to give yourself fresh eyes!

It'll make sense more later as I use things in conjunction with each other, but to keep things simple and streamlined, I'll be using a basic trait system to describe a few aspects of each character -- I don't want to be here too long going into intricate backstories or the elevated nuance of each characters perspective. Ain't no one got time for that! Now... Bring out the ragamuffins...

(Cas, Conoric, Gwynnen, Hughwen, Sarabonney)

I'll just go over my main character, Cas, and hopefully show you how he fits in my world, story and works (or clashes) with the others characters.

Personality Team Player. Cas is a born leader who gets along with people. He's open-minded, hardworking and willing to see the merit in anyone. Cunning. He has a keen eye for reading people and situations, picking up on subtext which he uses to get what he needs. Determined. Cas can take determination to an unhealthy degree, misusing his body and own needs just to get a task down. Self-Reliant. While a team player at heart, he's unwilling to put too much on others and ends up taking on took much himself. Purpose Criminal Minded Hero. Cas has a mind shaped by his time as a sneak thief and street-level spy which he uses to solve crimes and help others within his community. While it gets results, his methods do not align with the strict moral values of some of his peers & superiors. Loyal to Ethelia. While Cas is not keen to weigh in on any discussions about the ruling of his country, he is actively against the rebels. Price of Honesty. Cas is TORN by his desire to just be honest all the time and his fears over what happens when he's too open. He's been nothing but honest about his childhood ties and all it's gotten him is more trouble and judgement. Thoughts on the Past. Cas tries to distance himself from everything that has happened, doing his best to forget and move on. Despite this, all of his motivations are driven by his obsession with his past. Perspective Authority Figure. Cas is seen by many as a respectable person to go to for help and wears his duties with pride. Criminal Past. Cas was once affiliated with a criminal brotherhood and despite his best efforts, that stain still colours his image. Ethelian Commoner. Cas had a relatively standard upbringing for Ethelia, (ignoring his time in the gang), with the same devotions and job prospects as others around him. His scope of the world and other perspectives is quite limited but he's eager to keep up and learn.

...okay, that should do for now. Here's the neat part:

This is a neat little visualisation of all the points I just went over about Mr Cas, with some alternatives for the personality points I went over. The personality points have a negative interpretation of that positive trait, which typically comes from them over-doing it. The negative aspect should be something that is key to how your character thinks. Determined being overdone into Workaholic makes sense. Cunning being overdone into Secretive isn't so straightforward. It plays on Cas' natural desire to see the best in people and be a Team Player, so rather than start trouble, he just keeps his mouth shut. Thinks of all of these little traits as Attack Points. They a weapons in the character's arsenal, designed to help other characters and show them growth, to exploit other characters' weaknesses and provoke conflict or meaningful change.

They can be simple, like this:

Cas' good nature and willingness to find the right way to understand and work with people makes it easy for his brother, Conoric to open up and come out of his shell. The two share a mutual understanding of how the other works and are able to work in completely opposite ways but towards the same goal.

But they can also get a little more complex, like this:

This is ostensibly a conflict between Cas and Gwynnen about Hughwen. Both Cas and Gwynnen see eye to eye, as both men are authority figures of sorts and both a loyal to Ethelia, so their conflict will always be civilised and handled with conversation and respect. Ultimately this conflict is about Hughwen's.... hmm... level of trustworthiness. His first impression is rancid, he's the only survivor of an attack and he has a very guarded manner that makes him look like a liar... and being accused by people in authority activates ACAB mode in him were he starts being snide, snippy and putting words in peoples mouths just to look and feel that extra bit persecuted. Cas naturally wants to believe in Hughwen and when Hughwen gets more defensive and leans into his idea that everyone is out to get him, it makes him look more like a black sheep underdog and makes Cas EXTRA want to stand by Hughwen. Gwynnen takes a more level-headed but letter-of-the-law approach, asking the logical questions but analysing and scrunitising every answer. If it doesn't match up with other stories or the evidence he's found, Gwynnen starts getting sceptical and asking more and more questions, which puts Hughwen's back up and activates Defiance Mode. Cas and Gwynnen oppose the other on the criminal background vs nobility background. Cas may accuse Gwynnen of not understanding how people outside of restricted society work and how people might hide their smaller crimes to avoid judgement. Gwynnen may accuse Cas of seeing himself in everyone with criminal or shady instincts, wanting too hard to see the best in everyone.

If you were to visualise all of your character interactions, it might be too big and too wordy but keeping the points of conflict in mind may help you develop characters and their interactions more thoroughly. Seeing where a character's weakness is and how it can be exploited or overcome is fun. Flipping and corrupting positive traits and aspects into negative, detrimental traits is fun. Finding how characters can get along and how they can clash in ways that go beyond "you are rich and I am poor, so I hate you, but we both like chess, so I guess you are not all bad" is SO MUCH FUN.

Get out there and have so fun. We'll be back whenever I can formulate what I want to say to talk about MBTI and Enneagram later.

In the meantime, if you have any questions or want to give me lots and lots of praise, then my Asks are VERY open.

UNTIL NEXT TIME!

Happy creating!

Want more writing advice? Check out this post!

#story talk #about characters #character dynamics #let's have some fun

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grace-bestowed-by-nature · 3 months

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Halsin favoring a bear form and being compared to one is so much deeper than his size. Bears represent so many things, unyielding endurance, and strength, but not really talked about much unless the character in question is female: mothering, caring.

And Halsin is those things. It is not normal for druids to let strangers or anyone into their groves. They try to keep civilization at bay as much as possible. While some, namely the druids Halsin was raised around, the goal is balance. And even then there is this disdain for those outside of the druidic orders, as I feel even the shadow druids garner more respect than outsiders.

Yet, Halsin seems to focus on the nurturing aspects of nature, he lets the tieflings in because he knew they would die on the road between the goblins and the gnolls mating season, coupled with the Absolute stuff. Other Archdruids would understand something is happening, but it wouldn't spur them to help the fleeing tieflings. Part of nature is death and the brutality of it. Silvanus is a neutral god, and one of the few who are truly neutral, like Helm. Where turning them away wouldn't have been out of malice, but a case of "it is, what it is."

Halsin time and time again shows a caregiver side of himself, like in the end, while kind of a joke on Larian's part, him taking on the orphaned children. If romanced he worries dragging you into a domesticated life bores you. Because he's so fucking happy, caring for others and helping them learn skills. He's a protective mother bear.

That much is clear because when you rescue him, if you have talk to animals active, he blatantly says he wants blood. He refuses to leave until the goblin leaders are dead. His grove and those he promised to protect were in danger so now what was the threat needed to catch those paws. It also lends to the survivor's guilt he has over the Shadow Curse.

But rambling aside, Halsin is more bear than the jokes and the obvious. It also makes me think that in time Halsin might find his sway moving more towards Chauntea, as he strives to find the balance between the civilized world and nature. As she is more caring than Silvanus, and is often considered his counterpart, and while she is still deeply tied to nature she is basically the goddess of farming and agriculture. This seems to be what Halsin wants to bring to people, care for nature, and how to use it without harming it or destroying the land.

While there is that note keeping farmers away from the area, I can't remember if it was Halsin who wrote it or his former mentor. Because learning to farm and not harm the earth seems to be more his pace. Finding that middle ground.

Here is the hard truth with Silvanus and most druids: The strong survive.

And Halsin seems very keen on protecting the weak because he sees the nuance in nature. Sure it is brutal at its core, yet some social animals will protect weaker pack members. Within reason again. Halsin understands that humanoid races are a bit more complex than that.

I'm still rambling, but my point Halsin, is likely a black sheep even among other druids.

#🌿i shall avoid every gaze (ooc)#��what i would not give for a chunk of fresh honeycomb (about)#🌿nature's strength lies within me (headcanon)

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musical-chick-13 · 8 months

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Genuinely I absolutely, thoroughly hate the way people have gotten in regard to "You can write fic about dark subjects, but don't ever go into detail about those subjects" (if they even concede that people are "allowed" to write about anything unpleasant at all).

Because I just read an excellent one that was...very fucked-up! Actually!!! But it was also a nuanced and gripping examination of abuse--switching between the POV of the abuser (who lies to themselves about the reality of their actions, making their POV sections all the more uncomfortable for it), their victim (who lies to themselves in a different way, by refusing both to acknowledge their own victimhood or to consider the ways they later come to continue that cycle) and, eventually, an outside party (who is the only one aware of the true reality, and tries (and fails) to help, through the comparatively powerless ways that are available to them).

And this thing was not reserved in any way regarding its depiction of all of this. It didn't cut away cleanly after a vague uncomfortable comment for the reader to fill in every single blank for themselves. There were even times where the victim themselves was under the impression that they were genuinely enjoying what happened, because they convinced themselves that they had control over a situation they never had control over!!! And I know that...certain people. Would absolutely accuse this fic of "romanticizing abuse" because of these things. Which I think is an INCREDIBLY unfair assessment of it, especially since most of the time the discussion of "romanticizing [x]" is less a discussion and more, "I don't care what the author intended, this story simply shouldn't exist because this is incontrovertible proof they are a horrible person in reality, also they should die."

#do NOT ask me what the fic was if this post finds the type of people I'm complaining about they would 100% go and harass this person #I'm also thinking about that One Scene in shiki (b/c I'm thinking about shiki a lot in general during many days) in the hospital with the #experimentation. and THAT one is horrifying and grisly too but I wouldn't take it out? the most brutal act we see is by a human.#the most realistic horror is perpetrated by the guy who thinks he's In The Right that MEANS something. it's INTEGRAL to the story's themes!#and like. yeah sometimes these things CAN come across as fetishistic (or at the very least...WILDLY ineffective) or gratuitous #but that's not automatically the case?#like I really do think there's a middle ground here between 'ALL depictions of EVERYTHING are EQUALLY effective and we do not EVER need to #consider how various topics are typically presented in art (especially when it's meant for a mainstream public audience)' and #'SOME things should NEVER be talked about or if you HAVE to they can ONLY be done THIS specific way or else you should KILL YOURSELF'#like I think we can gauge a story's effectiveness and cultural context and optics on a given issue with. you know. actual nuance.#tw: abuse #tw: suicide baiting #tw: death threats #tw: abuse mention #I'm trying to cover all the tags that people might have blacklisted

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supernovafeather · 2 years

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The Commander's Will (18+)

First Order!Poe Dameron x Prisoner!Rebel!F!Reader

Content : noncon, gangbang, double penetration, unprotected sex, creampie, nudity, dom!FO!Poe, Dark!FO!Poe

Exhaustion took over your body a while ago now and your only possibility is to hang there with your wrists tied up to the ceiling, your bare feet barely reaching the concrete ground and your mouth dried out due to the scarf stuck in there tied at the back of your head. Many fluids stain your skin and in your half-asleep you can't define which one you are the most covered of between sweat, blood and sperm. You thought you would be relatively safe before they hand you over to their Commander but you were wrong. Now you don't care the way this man will treat you when he sees you. You just hope the Resistance is going to rescue you sooner or later. There is no way they don't try to get you back after your crash, you sent them a message right after you understood you wouldn't escape the First Order squadron.

An old iron gate creaks in a horrible noise in the basement of this abandoned manor in the middle of the tropical forest. Strange animals you never heard of scream as blasters sounds erupt here and there, and according to the loud laughs there are Stormtroopers shooting at them. Maybe they hunt them down to get something to eat or just to have fun.

You crack one of your eyes open at the footsteps getting closer to you. Here he is. Poe Dameron. You saw his face and prowess on his files in the Rebel base. You recognize his dark curls, brown eyes, this nose, these perfect lips. The face of a politician charming crowds of influential and stupid people, not of a monster leading the First Order to a more than certain victory. General Organa can tell you all the lies she could to maintain the spirit of the Rebellion, but Poe Dameron was a Commander talented enough to break your army. No wonder why he is always on the frontline so high in the skies and space.

"Good morning." He says as if you were taking some caf together. "I hope you could get some rest last night."

You don't answer, spying on all the micro expressions so obvious on his features : disgust at the bruised on your belly, amusement at your bare breasts, anger at all the dried seed on your thighs. He stands straight, his black helmet pressed against his hip and the rest of his pilot outfit still on. For a man you have imagined so much as a strict military type of guy, he is disturbingly nonchalant. Not in his stance but... there is something, some nuance you can't quite catch. It's like his face doesn't have a filter. He is so expressive, not trying to hide behind the usual coldness and threat.

"They messed you up." He comments as he turns around you, your protests muffled by the scarf as he starts to touch your bare asscheeks. "Look at that mess. How many were they on you my cutie ? They must have been two on you at the same time."

His forefinger plays a bit with your anus still dilated as seed leaks from it, and your pathetic attempt to kick your leg only leads to some more liquid to run down your lower lips from your vagina.

"My poor little Rebel." He coos as he spanks you once. "You're lucky you're hot. We could have left you for dead in that forest. You should thank me for telling my team to land there to check if you were alive. Don't you think ?"

He walks back right before you, his face unbothered by your enraged mumbles. He smiles then steps back to have a better look at your forms.

"I should have had my fun before them. I don't appreciate that they leave my girl like that but... well, it's been long for me." He says as he rests his helmet on a metal chair.

Pacing towards you, he lowers his pants, stopping to watch you as he strokes himself.

"I hope they all made you cum." He mutters as you watch him getting harder as he massages the tip. "I wouldn't like to end up like that if I couldn't have some fun myself."

The Commander smiles as he looks down at his proud shaft now erected fully and leaking a little. You, you grow agitated, trying vainly to free yourself from the ropes that have been hurting your wrists all night long.

"Shut up." He coos with a smile as he stop right before you. "Shut up beautiful. You're getting ridiculous."

Just like that the pain in your forearms disappear as he lifts you up, locking your legs around his waist. Instead, pain irridiates your whole body under the sudden change of position. Shoulder, back, thighs, everything hurts and it's not his eager lips and tongue targeting your left nipple that can divert your attention, nor his hands pressing your buttocks.

"Beautiful." He comments before leaving a trail of kisses on both of your breasts. "They weren't lying."

You struggle as he moves his hands from your ass but you feel him sliding inside you easily, his shaft helped by your own wetness and all the seed still present in you. This is enough for him to moan loudly, a huge smile on his face as he watches himself getting deeper and deeper in you.

"Such an obedient girl. Almost a year of abstinence because our leader doesn't bother about giving us girls like you. Can you believe it ? You should become a whore you know. A military whore, getting fucked by a whole battalion while dressed as a Resistance pilot. Shit that would be good."

His hands are back on your asscheeks, his face peaceful as you try to get him out of you unsuccessfully, his shaft rubbing your insides gently. His eyes are full of lust, his teeth biting his bottom lip as he looks down at your breasts bouncing under your desperate gestures.

"Shit they should have kept your outfit." He moans as he thrusts up. "Would have loved to take you from behind with that stupid clothing." He thrusts up again, harder this time. "So visible that even my men would have seen you getting fucked from afar." He thrusts up again, then again, and again. "Bending you over your own X-Wing as I make you cum before killing you. How would that feel, I ask you."

Defying him with your gaze is your only tool but you soon give up, noticing how much he loves it. It aroused him even more, his hips keeping a steady pace as he shuts his mouth for a while.

"Listen to that." He demands as wet noises get too obvious. "I missed that kind of stuff. You you got everything last night, lucky girl."

Your moans are impossible to repress and you can only look at the ceiling, your teeth trying to get rid of that nasty scarf blocking your breath sometimes. The Commander is stronger than you though, and you may be moving the top of your body as much as you want it isn't sufficient to break his grip over your waist.

"You must have a beautiful voice." He taunts you before sucking on both of your nipples once. "Maker you feel good."

His hips don't slow down as he rests his head against the crook of your neck, your disgust increasing at his lewd moans as he grabs your right breasts in his hand, his thumb pressing and circling your perked nipple.

"You feel amazing." He comments. "Maybe I won't kill you. Yeah I definitely shouldn't." He chuckles as you tense up silently under pleasure. "Why are women so beautiful?"

It's not long for Poe Dameron to reach his climax, his relieved sigh caressing your shoulder as you stopped fighting. It's useless under their grasp. Useless.

"Don't be upset." He whispers at your ear. "Please don't be. I'm going to spare your life. Such a brave girl." He lets a trail of kisses on your throat as he rubs your back up and down. "What about I keep you in my chambers ? Life spared, protected and having to cum at my cock every night ?"

You protest and try to kick him again but he only smiles as you shake your head.

"I knew you'd love that idea."

He spanks you once before stepping back from you just enough to keep your legs around him yet see his seed leaking from your soiled entrance, his cock bouncing once on his firm belly before softening.

"You're my first girl in a while, of course I'm going to grow attached to you my little Rebel whore. I'm a sensitive man under that outfit you know." He says before stepping back more, smiling as you let a muffled scream out at the violent pain surging in your wrists now that the rope is the only thing letting you stand on your toes.

The Commander keeps a close eye to you as he dresses back, especially interested by your crotch and breasts.

"I'm fascinated by your body. How much you can take from my whole squadron and still cum while I can barely give a second round of I find the motivation to do so. I admit you're stronger than me on that point. I hope you don't get pregnant from one of them. I'd love to fuck a woman carrying my baby but not someone else's. That's gross."

He takes his blaster in his hand, and your hope doesn't last for long as the rope becomes his only victims, causing you to crash loudly against the ground, tears streaming all over your face as he carries you with a strong arm around your waist.

"Now, you're my girl, they can't touch you, look at you or talk to you the way they used to." He says as he places you in his arms to lift you." You're going to get a shower and get an isolate room in some part of our ship. You know, the time you calm down. I'll visit you at nights. Then you'll share my quarters. When I get promoted you follow me. You'll see, you won't lack of anything out there, better than in your bases full of rats fighting for fake ideals. At least we are civilized up there."

You keep shaking your head no but he kisses your cheeks as you emerge from the basement, Stormtroopers watching you closely as their Commander details your future in the First Order.

- - - - -

@salome-c @stevenngrant @lavenderluna10 @one-hell-of-a-disappointment @dailyreverie @thecursivej @lady-targaryen @general-latino @harrys-tittie

#first order poe #first order poe dameron #poe dameron x reader #poe dameron x you

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trekkele · 2 months

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"# i think If you want a genuine critique of Batman then Leslie and her pacifism is far more interesting"

So true. Unfortunately nobody's been writing her well since the 90s or '00s. At least, I didn't come across anything featuring her in a well thought out way.

I'm split on counting War Games because 'she would not fucking do that' as people say. However, it is her position on morality taken to the twisted extreme. Still, intentionally killing or faking it, is very emotionally hurtful, like trauma inducing hurtful. Both for Steph and the Batfam and her mother.

Looked up the exact definition of pacifism and, well:

"Pacifism is a policy or doctrine of rejecting war and violence in solving disputes"

She kinda did use violence (emotional and body violating and zero consent from removing Steph from her life) to solve a dispute. Or to "free" Steph of her bat-duties, but it still counts.

Would love for Leslie to go after other batfam members and not just Bruce and argue with them about their methods.

Actually i think Stephanies death, either by medical negligence or a failure of her support system, is a natural consequence of Leslies brand of pacifism and while “She, personally, might not fucking do that” her philosophy might so its not as ooc as id like it to be.

So to discuss Leslie i think i have to establish two things 1. She suffers from being a (mostly) anti Batman character in a Batman comic* and

2. She and Jason are actually on two ends of a spectrum, with Leslie being “it is better to be the victim of violence then the perpetrator of it” and Jason being “it is better to enact unspeakable violence then be the victim of it”. With Bruce in the middle like “can we please get some nuance in here can we please get some fucking nuance” which is. Very funny actually.

(Its funny because Bruce, by being Batman, has basically decided to become the nuance - he will be violent for you, and by being so good at violence he can minimize the amount of actual violence needed)

So by letting Steph die, Leslie is essentially saying “no amount of violence can save us, isnt it better to die then without having inflicted it upon others?” Which is so very Ghandi of her, but also fucking insane and yeah Bruce was 100% right to never trust her again after that.

She is also - ok so the thing is, in-universe, being a teenage vigilante is. It’s basically like being a dance kid. Its going to have a profound and everlasting effect on the kids mental and physical health, there are side effects we still don’t entirely understand, but for the most part its just. Something some kids do!! Some of them insist on doing it (dick, damian (<-i have thoughts about why Bruce didnt want to give Damian robin ok) some of them realize it isnt good for them but cant really give it up (jason, maybe tim?) some of them are in it just for their stage moms (cissie king-jones) and some of them suffer long term consequences due to insufficient parental supervision (kon, pre-nu52) etc etc. Leslie is the mom in the corner who thinks allowing her kid to perform or even learn ballet in a studio is a slippery slide to abuse. She thinks no kid should ever be in that environment, and by Bruce allowing Dick to do so, despite Bruces reluctance in the matter and almost oppressive supervision, he has doomed an entire generation of kids.

She is never going to criticize anyone else in the batfam, because to do so would be admitting that kids have agency beyond what adults believe is best for them, and admitting that means being unable to push her “correct” views upon them.

Leslie is actually a pretty good stand in for fandom in that way; refuses to allow anyone but Bruce agency and independent thought, refuses to place blame anywhere but Bruce, insists a difference of opinion is grounds for dismissal of personhood and respect, and believes Gotham would be better off if Batman never existed.

(Once again i have no idea if i answered your question/addressed your ask. Sorry)

#asks #leslie as the real world stand in actually works really well #i do have to clarify that i like her!! irl i would probably agree with her #but this is a power fantasy not irl

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darkpoisonouslove · 1 year

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Erendor/Samara because I’m interested 👀

And Marion/Oritel purely for self-indulgence 😇

Lmao sticking to canon is going to be a challenge considering how little screen time they have. And I mean both couples here.

Erendor x Samara:

1) I'm going to go with an educated guess here and say that they probably had an arranged marriage considering their stance on Sky's engagement to Diaspro and the fact that arranged marriages are totally still a thing as we've seen. I like that about them because they're clearly not head-over-heels in love but they seem very compatible (both in 2x14 and later in s5). Arranged marriage is one of my fave tropes and I think all iterations are interesting. Usually, though, my ships fall into the "hate at first sight that grows into begrudging love later" but they are a more middle-ground version. They're not bursting at the seams with love but aren't also particularly uncomfortable with each other which works very well for them as characters, I think. That would tie perfectly into their insistence on the marriage between Sky and Diaspro because they've grown to feel content in their marriage (so Sky should too) while at the same time they don't understand his passionate feelings for Bloom (because their situation is different).

2) Honestly, I've kind of grown to find how horrible they are funny. Like, Brandon and Bloom (in particular) don't deserve the dismissal and downright resentment that they get from Erendor and Samara but their intolerance and entitlement can also be quite funny. Especially since they've both had a couple more graceful moments which just means that they choose to completely suck about 98% of the time. Those better moments in particular are what makes them work as awful people for me because it feels like it was a deliberate choice made for their characterization. I am aware that it most definitely was not. Their characters specifically are literally just what works for the plot but the show of positive traits makes them feel more nuanced. It feels like there's something that could be explored with their characters instead of them just being hostile to Bloom simply to amp up the drama with Sky's arranged marriage. With good writing you can actually make them feel like complex people.

3) I LOVE the implication in Magical Adventure that Erendor just felt so guilty for betraying his alliance with Domino and the consequences this would have for the relationship between him and Samara. In 2x14 she's actually the one who's more antagonistic towards Bloom so I don't imagine she is fond of anyone from the Domino family. Having Erendor walking around like he's a ghost himself just because of his broken promise to Oritel would have probably annoyed her heavily to say the least. But then on the other hand, there's the fact that Samara is pretty much the only sane person in s5 (which was certainly A Choice) and she's the one who's more understanding of Sky and Bloom's relationship. It doesn't lead to tension between her and Erendor but I love the idea that it could. That is to say, their good character traits seem to be in total disharmony which leads to the funniest fucking implication that the only way they can remain compatible is to be on their worst behavior, always. Which, in turn, supports the idea that they are in love because, as I already pointed out, they are totally awful at least 98% of the time.

Did you expect all three points to come together in an essay-like meta because I did not?

Marion x Oritel:

I'll try to be short here because I put too many brain cells into the previous ship.

1) Love that Marion is the one with the Dragon Fire while Oritel is barely implied to have any magic. Extremely sexy of them. (Also, when the maids referred to them as "Your Majesty" and "Your Highness" in SotLK, they were talking to Marion first and she's who they referred to as "Your Majesty" because Oritel is just a consort even if they call him a king; you can't change my mind.)

2) Having a baby during a magical war? Iconic. On a serious note, though, I'm 100 000% certain that that was extremely hard on them both from an emotional and tactical point of view. It adds a lot of depth to their characters (or would if they had fucking bothered to give them any attention whatsoever) to know that they weathered the stress and dangers during the pregnancy only to then sacrifice themselves to save the Magic Dimension. Like I said, iconic.

3) Okay, this actually pretty directly goes against canon (5x12) but who can tell me that they aren't totally in sync in battle and practically know what the other one is thinking? Just try to convince me that that's not the case. They are totally battle mates and a power couple and their teamwork is pretty much unmatched. They are absolutely NOT each other's weak spot; in fact, the only way to defeat them is to separate them because their love for each other just gives them too much power.

Would you look at that? I can actually keep things short!

send me a ship and I’ll tell you three things I like about it

#winx club #winx erendor #winx samara #erendor x samara #marion x oritel #winx marion #winx oritel #ask #her-majesty-wears-jeans #winx ships

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ratsandfashion · 5 months

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Mirima is actually an OC that I've had for awhile (like...a year?) and just haven't done anything with. I'd like to app her at one of the supernatural boards I write her at as a chamois shifter but I just don't have the time for another character there. But if you are interested in her, here's what I have written down about her! Yes, she has self-insert elements/self-aspirational aspects (like being a fantasy writer and animal lover, opinions on real writers, etc) and that is on purpose.

Mirima "Miri" Gohar Marinakis (Mira also a nickname) FC is D.ilan G.wyn (K.urdish, T.urkish, G.reek, A.rmenian, C.ircassian) 33-35 Gay Ace Virgo Sun, Libra Moon, Capricorn Rising 5'4 but leggy so she looks taller, which she augments with how she dresses; she's had people guess up to 5'7 She grew up how I wanted to, working with animals and also writing fantasy. She's published nine novels, one anthology of short stories, and 35 pieces of flash fiction in online magazines. She mostly writes urban fantasy, but also gothic horror, new weird, gaslamp fantasy, steampunk, high fantasy, low fantasy, and magical realism. Critics say she makes wonderful, engaging, unique characters and has some fantastic ideas, but her plot and worldbuilding are often weak, plus her pacing needs a lot of work. She's a very small name in the industry and probably always will be, and while she'll never make a living off it, she's happy to be doing it. She consistently wears shirts backwards without realizing She has pet snails and a 3 year old female S.ardianian m.arginated t.ortoise named Z.aratan after the legendary giant sea turtles described by Al-J.ahiz, an A.rab prose writer and zoologist in the 9th century, Zara for short. The snails are Snally, Snusie, and Snamantha She has very complicated opinions on A.nne Rice and S.tephen King as writers and as people, but unquestionably HATES L.aurell K. H.amilton as BOTH. She has not met ANY of them. Absolutely rehearses imaginary arguments in her head that she's never going to actually have The first novel-length anything she ever finished was a D.une fanfic when she was 15 about a gender-swapped P.aul A.treides. She hadn't even finished the first book but she had IDEAS! P.aula A.treides remains her most beloved creation even if she can never be published. Miri is NOT a rebel. She is the reverse. She likes following rules and finds it hard to disrespect or disobey authority. She knows in theory how dangerous this is due to her heritage and the themes of her own writing but it just seems part of her personality. She's just always been the good (read: compliant and manageable) kid and she's only comfortable being the "good" kid. Very fussy, needs to stay on schedule and have things a certain way, hates spontaneity and anything unplanned, doesn't deal well with change especially on short notice Very analytical, keen attention to detail, overthinks and can cross the line into being way too critical Judgey, even just internally Definitely wants to help but limited by her inflexibility and anxiety She gives the appearance of being very practical, capable, and organized but inside she's super anxious and has a ton of self-doubt, which clashes against her considerable ambitions as a novelist. Strong sense of responsibility---filial, societal, but also to herself and her dreams, which also prevents her from getting in trouble or taking risks that could jeopardize those dreams Miri is skilled in social diplomacy and tends to use charm and tact to get what she wants. She’s the sort of look at an issue from all sides and typically takes the middle ground, both because she genuinely sees nuance but also because she doesn’t want to make waves. Miri is overly compliant because she wants to be seen as likeable and sweet She tries to stay out of conflict and not take sides because she doesn't want anyone mad at her Miri still has her L.ita boots from 10 years ago when they were trendy, and she loves that they’re called L.ita boots because that’s S.ailor J.upiter’s name in the English dub of S.ailor M.oon she grew up on and they look like the boots she wears.

Likes: - Bees - Pretty organizational supplies/journals/stationary - Specific instructions - Harmonious group dynamics

Dislikes: - Tense situations - Interpersonal conflict - Logical fallacies - Being in charge - Being late, she absolutely PANICS over even the slightest tardiness and texts immediately if she's going to arrive more than five minutes after the expected time - Lots of people talking - The lost potential of the A.nita B.lake series - Trying new media, especially music; she just listens to the same songs on repeat. This makes it super difficult to make playlists for her book characters - Widespread misunderstandings/misinformation (ex: the M.cDonald's coffee case, the idea evolution means we came from monkeys, etc) - Readers and writes mistaking darkness in fiction for depth - A whole lot common of urban fantasy tropes - People trying to "win" social interactions - People insisting they know something when they clearly don't

#ocs

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mommaghost · 9 months

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What's your ideal life partner like?

Welp, you opened it. It's a can of worms and you opened it.

Here's the thing: I just want someone to weather the storms with me.

Also I am polyamorous so that's a whole other thing.

(And nobody liked that)

A preliminary note: I am autistic and have very severe CPTSD. The PTSD and chronic pain are more disabling than the autism tho. Being autistic just makes me a weird ass.

I know that my first relationship in a pandemic world is going to be GNARLY. It gives me a massive amount of guilt because some poor person sees spouse material and it turns out "oh no they're crazy 😬".

(Realistically, I am not. I am very well rounded.)

And a few basic criteria I've picked up over the years:

Communication: we need to communicate clearly what one another needs.

Compromise: i am almost always a meet in the middle person

Career: i can't be the sole provider. I cannot do that. My compromise with my last partner was look you have 3 months to decide on a job or school.

Finances: I really cannot do it on my own for two people.

Morals: I am an anti-facist abolitionist. I've worked in healthcare my entire adult life. There's plenty of nuance that boils down to all humans deserve dignity and rights, I believe most people are mostly good, and that being a good person takes WORK.

Kids: I love children. I want children. I want to be a parent so bad it physically hurts me sometimes. Someone who is kind to the tiny, confused humans.

Flexibility: trauma makes things weird. Autism makes things weird. My libido yo-yos. I get crushes easy, it happens. My friends and I are all very loving and affectionate. Just tiny things that allow my autonomy. That don't compromise me.

Understanding: I have lived independently for almost a decade. I'm set in some ways. I'm anal about bathroom cleanliness. I have trouble cooking. I need someone who can meet me halfway.

Must tolerate and treat cats with kindness.

I need someone who will stand by me in thunderstorms that remind me of hurricanes. Who understands that a raised voice fucks me up. I want a partner. Someone to be there with me, someone that chooses me. (Even if it's poly, I want to fucking matter).

(Also a random thing but too much facial hair unfortunately sends off sirens in my brain which. Sorry to facial hair enjoyers, it ain't me.)

Honestly the bar is on the ground and here we fucking are.

#ghost answers #ghost posting #mommaghost #thank you so much

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thebreakfastgenie · 2 years

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you're moving the goalposts. you're now claiming your post was "obviously" about white, middle-class college graduates when people told you that it is actually pretty poor behavior from a parent to kick an adult out onto the street for not being able to afford rent in an economic crisis. the point about middle ground was not that anyone thought you were saying that parents must charge children rent at all times. it's that some of us do genuienly believe that letting your kid, even if they are a legal adult, be homeless becuase they can't afford market rent, when you have the means to avoid that, even if you are not "rich", is an immoral act. asking someone who has the means to contribute is not the same thing and we agree on that.

I did not say it was "obviously" about anything and I never said I was talking about white people, that was either you or another anon who is competing with you for the "how dare we you say we piss on the poor" award.

I do think this is mostly (not entirely) a phenomenon among middle class college graduates and by that I mean the discourse about it. but that's just my anecdotal observation.

I was never, at any point, talking about the morality of refusing to take in an adult child whose only alternative is homelessness. you all jumped to that for some reason. I regularly see the take on the internet that it is wrong and immoral for parents to charge their adult children for living with them under any circumstances. That is what I was talking about.

I said like three asks ago that I personally believe if someone is going to be homeless and their parents have the means to support them they should do it.

That being said, housing is extremely expensive and in short supply, and there are plenty of homeless people who have income, just not enough to afford housing in their location. So there may be cases where parents provide free housing but still ask their adult child to pay for their own groceries. There is a lot of room for nuance, here. I am pissed off at people reducing this wide range of situations to the most extreme possibility.

I'm not the one moving the goalposts.

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wild-at-mind · 2 years

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I keep thinking about why it seems tumblr kids are so weird about reclaimed slurs like queer and whatnot, and based on my own experiences I've come up with a few ideas.

1. Reclaimed slurs within the lgbtq community are more complicated than some others, and often people like certainty. E.g. if you're not black, it's easy to know if saying the n word is ok: it's not. But with words like dyke, fag or even queer, I don't think the impulse to ask yourself whether you would have been targeted by someone saying this slur to hurt is a bad one. Wait wait come on let me finish, doesn't mean I think tagging '[whatever letter] slur' everywhere is the way to go. But I think thought and reflection on your actual life experiences are a good thing. That said I am so done with the annoying, inevitable 'can bi people say it?' shit when it comes to homophobic slurs. There is no need for big fuckoff barriers and gatekeeping. We're all complicated humans and the thing with life experiences is you keep having more every day, and sexuality and gender expression evolve throughout your life. A word you would say once you might find stops applying to you as an identity, and vise versa. That's why personal reflection is all I personally care about and not whatever identity you are. Not that what I say matters. But all these nuances don't translate well online and I think some people long for the simple 'if x, then don't say y'.

2. In your teens and early 20s I think extreme black and white thinking is more common, simply because you haven't had as much life experience and your brain isn't done developing. Plus it feels good to sort people into an in group and out group, because the harder you do this, the more you can belong with that in group. It seems like on tumblr and twitter a favourite way of putting people into an out group is to find some behavior your don't like, e.g. saying a word your in group deems a slur that no one should be using. That person now officially sucks and you can warn others about them, reinforcing your in group as the safe one. I remember absolutely loving this kind of thing in my early 20s, my ocd brain adored the simple black and white, good and evil ness of it all. I would mentally sort tjmblr users into good and bad. If I wasn't sure where to stand on an issue, and the middle ground wasn't an option (you could get viciously attacked and shamed all over tumblr for not being strong enough on an issue, probably you still can), then i would 'root' for the angriest side. Usually the one saying 'x is bad' and not 'x is good, because avoiding saying or doing something has to be safer than doing it, right?

Then I got a bit older (and got on the right meds but that may have been a coincidence), and fucking hell I HATE 'discourse' now. I just can't stomach it. I love nuanced arguments and not seeing issues in black and white. I don't know what people see in it but I assume if you're younger and haven't seen this stuff a billion times before, and are seeking to belong, that probably helps.

3. With the word queer in particular, a lot of people tell the same story: 'well it was all the way reclaimed, but then TERFs came along and made people say q slur and all the kids don't know!' But that story is very simplified. Often the only proof given to strengthen it is 'my college campus in the mid 2000s had a queer studies degree '. In reality most people don't go to university, and your comfort with the word queer varies greatly depending on your life experience, which is affected by age, class and your specific identities within the lgbtq community. (People don't get to tell others what to call themselves, but I don't think they do that because they fell for some TERF logic. The idea of things being very simple and black and white, good and bad may be used by TERFs but its also used by groups with basically all and any ideologies, hateful or 'social justice' or anything. And there are people on here and twitter who are very vocal about never saying queer who are trans women and/or very anti TERF, which I imagine could throw you off if someone else is telling you only TERFs don't want people to say queer.) It's a simple story but things are never really that simple. Outside of specific online space things tend to be much less cut and dry.

Also, personally, I've always found queer and what it represents to be kind of a lot to live up to, because I have a massive complex about my own identity not bring good enough for this community. My own particular hang ups are not for me to try and push on others (they suck and I'm glad for people who don't have them!), but when I see people constantly try and get queer over as the perfect identity for confused people in our community, it does rankle a little. It doesn't work for my particular brand of confused and I've found that can be a lonely place to be. I've tried hard in the past to get people to understand, but they usually respond with yet more trying to get queer over. You can end up feeling a bit of a freak after a while!

Anyway, this is a long way of saying I have sympathy for the kids trying hard to say/not say the slurs correctly. The internet is a scary place for after all, it's a place where a post you didn't really think through enough can be seen by thousands of people who all suddenly hate you VERY quickly. A lot of these kids are protecting themselves the best ways they know how. Connecting strongly with real life communities may be a good antidote but as we know,not everyone is in a place where they can do that right now. Ideally we would have online spaces for isolated lgbtq teens and early 20s take place on platforms that DONT tacitly encourage this stuff. I can only hope. The freedom to make mistakes quietly in a post on a long forgotten forum must return!!

#lgbtq discourse #queer discourse #reclaimed slurs discourse #lgbtq+#online stuff #its a minefield out there on the internet for us all but its easier to avoid the mines when you have more life experience #so look out for the kids even if the things they say sometimes annoy you

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